#Asstonishing
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asstonishingxo · 7 months ago
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𝐌𝐮𝐥𝐚𝐧 𝐕𝐮𝐢𝐭𝐭𝐨𝐧 @𝐦𝐮𝐥𝐚𝐧.𝐯𝐱
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whitediamondzxo · 5 months ago
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🤍 | ♡𝐘𝐚𝐡𝐚𝐢𝐫𝐚♡ 𝐗: @𝐲𝐚𝐡𝐚𝐢𝐫𝐚𝐲𝐮𝐦𝐢
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squeez0 · 1 month ago
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eleanor-bradstreet · 1 year ago
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Do any of your WIPs include a gentleman with an Ass that just won't quit?
Bahahahaa 🤣🤣 what an ASStonishing question Nonny! (thank you @sorryallonsy for the pun 😉)
As it turns out, both of the gentlemen I write for possess asses that have never, and will never quit, as evidenced by
Exhibit A:
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and Exhibit B:
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I rest my case and hope you enjoy these peachy bums when they appear in fics 😉
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rbb-au · 2 years ago
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"Now where did this Teleporter take me?"
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@rbb-au-bynovaartz
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desmondkane-of-ao3-fame · 2 years ago
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How about some skarlow angst prompt: Willow hits her head during flyer derby training and gets a small case of amnesia, forgetting everything up to her first meeting with Luz, forgetting Luz entirely, being friends with Amity again, the entrails, even forgetting Skara being her girlfriend, so her friends and girlfriend have to help her remember what willow forgot!
Ah, this one sounds like the sort of tale that would absolutely crush Skara and everyone who reads it.
Lets do it!
This one got… a little away from me, and basically evolved into an “Understanding Willow” sequel by accident. It’s a long one, so if you’re gonna read it, I suggest you grab some popcorn and prepare your tissues as well. Lots of Skara angst in this one…
Willow would be leading another exhilerating round of Flyer Derby practice. They'd be practicing a particularly bold new strategy Skara came up with: The Drop Ride, where a player distracts their opponent by letting them get close, only to drop straight down super fast right before another player to fly up from behind and snatche the opponents flag. Willow's a bit hesitent, thinking the move could be dangerous, but Skara insists that it's as foolproof as a sports strategy can get. So, with a sigh and a smile, Willow agree's to try it. And it goes well at first: Viney's and Hunter are able to complete the move with ease, Gus makes it look effortless, and Skara's able to complete it no problem. So then it's Willow's turn.
Skara's the one who has to grab the flag this time, and just because she's dating Willow doesn't mean she's gonna go easy on her. So, when she reaches to grab the flag... she grabs it! Right before Willow drops! But Skara grabbed the flag with enough strength, and Willow dropped with such force, that Willow loses control, and before she can get Clover to rise back up, she crashes to the field at such an angle she flys off her staff, hitting her head and passing out.
The whole team rushes to Willow immediatly. Skara's the first one to reach her, craddling Willow in her arms and begging her to be ok, but Viney arrives shortly after, testing to make sure what Willow's condition is. After a few quick tests, Viney confirms, thankfully, that Willow's breathing regularly, but she needs to get to a Healer's bed. Skara carries her girlfriends into Hexside as the Entrails follow along, Gus calling Amity and Luz to let them know what happened as Skara internally begs the Titan to let her Petals be ok.
After a few hours, the Entrails, Luz and Amity, and Willow's dads are all around Willow's bedside, worried about when she'll actually come to. Viney's running tests and casts the occasional spell to help with a scrape as Hunter and Gus stand by, grabbing anything Viney says she needs to help her. Luz is comforting Amity, who feels useless in this situation, where Abomination's would just get in the way. Willow's dad's are both getting a lot of practice out of their anti-panic technique they taught Willow all those years ago. And Skara's holding Willow's hand, trying to reassure them that she'll get up soon, Petals is the toughest Witch in the world, it'll be just like a quick nap. But internally, Skara's beating herself up, angry at how she was the one who encouraged the strategy that caused this and she was the one who grabbed the flag and she-
Before she can blame herself further, though, Willow's eye's flutter open. Skara can't help but let out a delighted squeel as she watches, and everyone else turns and smiles at the sight! Willow's ok! Skara wraps her arms around Willow's neck, laughing as she kisses her cheek, so grateful that she's come to-
And Willow shoves her off, completely mortified.
"What the-Why were you just kissing me?!"
Skara's taken aback, confused and a little hurt, but Willow scans the room and her panic continues.
"Who-who are you two," she says, pointing to Luz and Hunter. "Amity, what are you doing here? And what's with your hair?" She grabs at her braids, asstonished. "A-and what's with my-"
Viney quickly takes charge, telling everyone except for Gus and her dads to get out! Skara wants to stay, but Viney insists, pushing everyone out. Skara wants to go back, but Amity stops her: if Viney, the only Healer they knew, wanted them out right now, there had to be a good reason. And Skara can't argue with that. But... Petals...
After what feels to Skara like a small eternity, Viney returns. It appears that Willow's memories have regressed to before meeting Luz. She thinks she's still taking Abomination classes, doesn’t know anything about Flyer Derby-
“And thinks I’m still bullying her.” 
It’s Amity who says it, but Skara thinks it to herself. It hurts, knowing Willow only can remember the worst things she ever did. The days she was friends with Boscha, before she stood up to her and left the triclops for her Petals. A part of her wants to cry and bemoan the unfairness of it all, but she knows this isn’t about her; it’s about Willow. So she takes a deep breath and asks Viney if there’s anything she can do to help.
Viney has one idea. And it’s one that’s a bit... unorthodox. And, they’ll need the help of a wise, powerful witch, who may be willing to bend a rule or two...
Willow’s put to sleep (which Skara can’t help but think makes her look like an angel... if a very spread out and loud angel) and Eda points them in the direction of one Raine Whispers, capable of doing what Viney wants to do: get someone inside Willow’s brain so they can help fix her memories. As soon as the plan is revealed, Luz and Amity volunteer: they both have experience going into Willow’s head, so it should be fine, right? But Luz suggests someone else: Skara. Everyone’s a bit surprised, but Luz reasons that, if Skara is the one who caused this mess, maybe she can be the one who can fix this, just like how Amity had to. Skara, wanting to make things right, agrees, standing tall and firm. As she looks down at her sleeping girlfriend, Skara promises the Titan, the Collector, whoever runs this stupid world, that she’ll do literally anything any of them ask, if it just means she can save Petals...
Raine hands Skara and Amity walkie talkies, casts the spell, and both Skara and Luz enter Willow’s mind forest. As Skara admires how even in Willow’s head, all her plants are beautiful, she takes note of a few things out of place: namely, shards of paintings, strewn across the forest floor, scattered like a thousand dulled stars. Amity explains the impact from the fall probably shattered them, which makes sense given how they were originally burnt when Amity set fire to her memories. The two set to collect all the painting pieces to set up all the memories the accident shattered. But as they do, Skara see’s herself in many of the still in-tact paintings. And many of those paintings painting her in a less then flattering light: laughing with Boscha as she made a cruel jab at Willow, pulling mean pranks on her. As she grabs more and more of the shards, she wonders more and more if she can really bring back... her Petals. If this flood of horrible memories is something she’ll think about, and if the reminder of who Skara was is going to cause Willow to break up with her. She shudders at the thought, trying to keep that idea out of her own mind for as long as she can...
But as that tries to leave her mind, a rustle in the bushes causes Skara to spin! Amity’s getting shards in the opposite direction! What...
Nothing. Nothing sits there.
Skara exhales, blaming it most likely on the wind. Willow’s... mental wind... 
Over time, both Amity and Skara collect almost all the pieces and begin to put them together (thankfully putting the pieces together in the frame just magically reconects them as opposed to needing glue which is not something I thought about until now). Some of the memories are good repaired, actually: Saving the Boiling Isles once and for all, the Entrails first championship, Willow and Skara’s first date. But some of them... Skara just tries to get those pictures over and done with. Amity attempts to keep the mood light and jovial, but with Skara barely responding to anything she says, she eventually just sighs and says:
“She’s not going to break up with you over this, Skara. I promise.”
That’s what Skara hears. And that’s what she wants to believe. What she wants to think. That Willow’s just going to shrug this all off when it’s over, accept Skara’s apology and plan their next date. It be a perfect ending.
And Skara knows that can’t happen.
She points back to the pictures on display, some of them stuff about her bullying Willow, making fun of her with Boscha and Amity. How she helped to make the biggest, kindest person in the world feel small and helpless for years. The fact Skara was able to befriend Willow, let alone date her, is a miracle from the Titan! But now, if Willow forgot about those memories and her old ones of Skara hurting her just flooded back in, then even if she remembers the good times, would Willow still accept her? If she remembers this period with amnesia and all these bad memories is it going to hurt Willow too much to date Skara? And heck, since Skara was the one who got Willow in this in the first place then-
Amity tries to talk Skara down; she’s getting hyper, overly anxious and scared. But Skara can’t stop being scared. She doesn’t want to lose her Petals. Skara doesn’t want to hear her say their through because she realized she couldn’t handle their past anymore. And the more Skara imagines it, the more scared and anxious she becomes.
She panics, and in her panic, angrily cries.
“Even when I’m dating her, all I do is hurt Willow!”
But before Amity can say anything, a hulking behemoth formed of petals and a thin, wirey, cacoon-like mesh, smashes through the forest! Glowing bright scarlet in rage, the beast takes a fist, roars, and smashes one of the tree’s with a painting the girls had finished! Shocked and confused, Skara watches as the beast raises its fist again at another tree, before Amity snaps her out of it, and Skara lunges at the creature! Not knowing if she can even do magic here, Skara just gives the beast the ol’ Skara Special, the same move she tried on that EC gaurd who tried to capture her... but to no avail. All it does is turn to her, angrier then it was even last time.
“You. Hurt. Her!”
The creature smashes its fist into Skara, sending her realing. Luz is able to send the thing back, but it still attempts to destroy another one of the paintings on their way out, one of Boscha ‘pranking’ Willow with an exploding potion in her Abomination goop. As Skara recovers her senses, she asks Amity if she has any idea what in Titan just happened!  And Amity’s quiet. She doesn’t want to say it. So Skara asks again, because she knows if Amity wont tell her-
“It’s... I think that was her Inner Willow.”
Skara feels a lump in her throat, and her fear worsens. She can’t help it: She runs, runs back through the forest of memories, trailed by Amity begging her to stop. But Skara keeps running, because at least running is better then facing the idea of Willow-
Skara realizes too late that she’s smacked into one of the tree’s, diving headfirst into the painting. At first she’s scared: She just landed in another reminder of her mistakes! Thats all she can-
But no. Instead, when she opens her eyes, it’s not that at all! It’s a memory of their first date! Of Willow playing (well, breaking) a Test of Strength and winning Skara a stuffed Slitherbeast. Skara watches on, as Willow hands her past self the oversized prize, to Skara’s delight. She remembers how she still has it in her room, and how she cuddles with it whenever Willow can’t be there...
Amtiy arrives, asking Skara to stop running before realizing she had. So they both stop, and watch the silly couple walking away, Skara kissing Willow’s cheek as the two made their way to grab some Rotten Candy. Amity sighs as she watches, patting the space next to her as she sits criss-crossed.
“I think we should talk...”
So they do. Skara sits, knees to her chest, and admits she knows she’s selfish. She knows she’s being stupid. But she’s so, so scared of losing Willow. 
“She’s the greatest thing to happen to me.”
She pauses.
“But you don’t think you’re the greatest thing to her?”
Amity sighs, placing a hand on Skara’s shoulder.
Skara takes a deep breath, let’s it out, and asks, shakily:
“If Luz… if she left you cause of how you used to be… what would you do?”
Amity’s eyes go wide. For a moment, Skara wonders if the idea of losing her girlfriend scares Amity more then it scares even her.
“I… I would be hurt. Incredibly hurt, I won’t lie.”
Amity takes her own shaky breath at the idea. “I’d probably curl into a ball on my bed and spend the next week crying. Losing Luz over the past… it would be like losing a limb.”
Skara knows it’s the same way with her.
“But… you’d get it?”
Amity nods. “I care about Luz. And I care about what she wants. What makes her happy. And if, Titan forbid, being with me didn’t make her happy… I’d break it off myself.”
It’s not exactly what Skara wants to hear, but it’s what she knows she has to.
Unfortunetly for them, their talk is interrupted tremors shaking the entire memory. As the two run to the gate, they spot the creature again, stomping about the forest and looking at other memories to smash. Remembering what Amity said earlier, about an ‘Inner Willow,’ Skara knows what she has to do. Leaping out from the painting, she runs up to it, standing in front of the newest painting to catch its eyes. 
“Willow, I’m sorry! If you hate me, I get it, and if you want to... to break up then-”
But that’s as far as Skara’s speech goes before she’s punted down the length of the forest.
The monster follows after Skara, and Amity rushes to catch up. But as she does, somthing stops her. The faint sound of crying in the distance. A very specific crying.
Willow’s crying.
Amity stops in confusion, and turns to the sound, seeing a faint purple glow in the same direction. She calls out, trying to grab Inner Willow’s attention. As they look up, she see’s their glasses fractured, cracks all across them, as she tries to stand. Amity rushes to Willow’s side, trying to help her up.
“There was a thud, and the whole place shook, and so many memory paintings shattered and now somethings here and-”
Amity’s already grabbing the walkie talkie, calling on help from Raine and the others to know just what the heck whatever’s hunting Skara as she drags Willow to catch up to them.
As they run after Skara, she’s currently being cornered by whatever it is that’s in Willow’s mind. She’s stepping back, unable to turn away from it. She pleads with it to stop, to let them finish, but all it can do is swipe at Skara, crying ‘YOU. HURT. HER!’ Skara jumps to the side, as it smashes it’s hand into the tree, causing the whole thing to shake and shatter the painting, once again. But this time, it stops, staring down at the pieces in shock, before trying to take them into its oversized hands. Skara stares on in bewilderment as the creature begins to try and reform the painting after smashing so many of them?
And then she looks down at the shattered pieces, and realizes what makes this memory different: It’s in Willow’s apartment building, right outside her door. Both girls are in their finest dress up attire after Skara brought Willow home from a movie, talking and laughing and holding hands and blushing and Skara taking a deep breath right outside Willow’s door and-
This is the memory of their first kiss.
And Skara thinks she knows whats going on.
Back with Amity and Willow, Raine tells them about called an Algos: a phenoma where a person can bring so much fear into another persons head it manifests as a seperate being! And this Algos seems to be coming from Skara!
Which Skara herself realizes, as the creature begins to shrink down, morph, into a glowing purple mirror of herself, save for dark, empty eyes. She’s trying to repair the painting, frantically putting the pieces back together like her life depnded on it, muttering about how all of this was her fault, how she can fix this, how she has to fix this, how-
Skara takes a seat next to her counterpart, helping to repair the memory. “After we fix this one,” Skara tells them, “we should try fixing all the other ones... we smashed.”
But her memory mirror shakes her head. “We hurt her. We hurt her and she’ll remember that. But, if she can’t remember, doesn’t remember, then-”
“Then we just make the whole thing a billion times worse.” Skara turns to her counterpart, taking their hand. “Believe me, I get it. I’m terrified of what she thinks of us when this is over. If she’s gonna hate us or not. But... but this isn’t about us. It’s about her. And if after all this, she breaks up with us, then...”
Tears stream down the purple Skara’s face. She looks up at the real Skara, eyes filled with pain and hurt and understanding. Then, without warning, she wraps her arms around Skara.
And Skara wraps her arms around them.
“Skara! You here! You ok?”
Skara blinks, and her mirror image is gone, now replaced with Amity, and a glowing purple Willow with broken glasses. Seeing them, she smiles.
“I’m ok, yeah.” Then, looking back on the ground, she notes “C’mon. We got some memories to re-make.”
A couple hours pass as the three girls put the memories back together again. Skara doesn’t say a whole lot, not really sure what she can say. She knows that some of the memories they put together make her too happy to say anything. And some of the memories make her want to stay silent forever. But as she, Amity, and Willow slide the last of the pieces into the final memory, of agreeing to Skara’s stupid strategy, she knows she’s ready for whatever comes of it.
As the last of the memories are repaired, Willow’s glasses lose their cracks, and she looks at Skara, wide eyed and beaming. 
Then, to Skara’s surprise, Willow hugs her.
And Skara hugs back.
With one last call to Raine, Amity and Skara return to the physical world. Viney, after making sure both of them are ok, holds smelling salts up to Willow’s nose and, much to everyones delight, she awakens. Coughing and hacking up a lung at the terrible smell, but awake none the less.
Everyone crowds Willow, hugging her and rapidly talking about how much their glad to have her back. Everyone but Skara, who stands behind them, still not sure what to say or do. But knowing she would only do it if it was best for Willow.
After a minute or two of everyones undivided attention, Willow notices Skara’s hesitation. She asks for some privacy, and after a few more hugs from Luz and some quick kisses from her dads, the room clears. It’s only the two girls, alone in the room.
Willow reaches out her hand. “You know I’m not gonna break up with you, right?”
Skara barely can believe the statement, even as she takes her girlfriends hand. “But when you pushed me away, and all the horrible memories... after getting you hurt again, how can you still wanna date me?”
“Because the girl who hung out with Boscha’s gone.” She squeezed Skara’s hand, smiling. “She’s just a memory. And now, I have this wonderful, amazing girl, this brilliant strategist and fun soul and silly bard, to be with.”
Skara can’t help but feel a few pinpricks of tears forming in her eyes. “Titan... you’re a sap when you wanna be, you know?”
Willow just smiles. “I’m glad I get to make new memories with you, Skara.” Right before pulling Skara in for a kiss.
And of course, Skara kisses back.
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eumegeud · 2 months ago
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The amount of assholes I've had to deal with this week is asstonishing
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asstonishingxo · 7 months ago
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𝐓𝐨𝐤𝐲𝐨 𝐃𝐫𝐢𝐟𝐭
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lonita · 17 years ago
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ASSTONISHING
That as smart as some folks are, they are still so socially inept and people-ignorant.
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the-firebird69 · 11 months ago
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and the posuedo empire ran round saying it all day we ddid not say that and had planned to cordon off for good the whole penninsula and do thei magic here alone. and later. and do it right and steel it all. an the magic was there they said. and then this. wew do it anyways without him and we hit the fag. and tons say it now. we go afte r them they are out sick an gone. now too bg had it too. said it need it now and out then and he is an ass. loser. we hope it is ok and says yeh they max out at 100gs a year and little kids make more a week and we see them cringe nad are stupid too and asses. and we say it he has ideas we like it not yours. the empire has some but your ridiculous heard i t too work for us. andwhy and you flipped out. and said it tired we did it tired him out we use exortion.
-and this is a day to remamber he says it me n dmac and ben and ken billium we think we can let you do it and see and he says ok we do knowing we said not good and also that we suggested no. and they say this whyso your friends can comein. and ok the clones tried and we do it right work an fire on ppl all over here. mac got mad let me out o fhtis you talk i go home it is late. and left no had him pinnned down and why wont we listen and so on. and said it over an over as you wont. let him o ut. and saaid dont ever do tht again. you fail to see my point and that is all. they smired and smiled laughed and said he is with him survival mode. nd said this we eat at them fag...pussy....your ladies. got anymore girl stuff i mean wow what bitches...and they were asstonished siad he led them there. and then this. we need to know why. and your shppers stick to it groceries and annoying like bitches. stick to it heard it said ok then what they looked. saw it not. and said they fight here and here. and lost it. justin cried that night...and said this fight timmy d and did no your wrong did not do the work idid andwas fascianted by the response we are too tired to carry on justin too tired. and true too.
Thor Freya
Olympus
and yeh timmy d is always tired mike t too. so he saw heard ken groan no no dont wake me and ok got up told him to look for moe fully know and did and studied maps and more. said this re huge dont say it off planet and high powered laser i got 700 class A 100 gten mile billium should and did. and he said wow and we think that o themorlock...and then this number of morlock in the popuolace and macs. and oh. and then infiltration suscces and stopped we see it. works ran over you fast. and so on bugs if failure and then this we see it. a wa but okand worked and ken said it is on and told him to study and owrked on gettingfeeash comprehensive data and there and there ndok and got some and went to biden and said it they die we die and talked now it is on they split now and tons ay will ruin them so what nd we have to
tons leave no wont. so they wait no have to now
Thor Freya
Olympus and they see ti happening now so not too hard and run at it yes no no dont. and are a few now growing and within the psuedo empire
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b2bmaldives · 1 year ago
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Unwind Pristine Parádeisos !
Because next chapter of your story should unveil a stunning backdrop of the Maldives, so we are here to find your island escape & curate the best of maldives itineraries and asstonishing experiences for You.
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historitor-bookshelf · 5 months ago
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Just digging out this post and art due to recent asstonishing reveals.
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Roboute Guilliman in his Terra Social Debut.
Officials praised his polite and composed demeanor,also his pragmatism and wit.Some secretly rejoiced that finally there was a primarch who valued smooth communication.
Yet,he was also considered lacking the charm of Horus and Fulgrim.This was because the 13th Primarch spent over an hour discussing "Military Camp Arrangements: Theory and Practice" with the most noble gentlemen and ladies on Terra.
Before making his debut, Guilliman had discreetly sought the opinions of Vulkan and Dorn, who were also there at that time in Terra. But he found their advice to be of no real value.
Nonetheless, Terra Gossip Gazette also praised the young primarch for his sharp jawline and nice butt. He didn't say anything about that,but experienced a brief moment of secret delight. When he returned to Macragge, he couldn't resist sharing this news with Euten, only to face playful ridicule.
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do-you-have-a-flag · 3 years ago
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Thierry Mugler Haute Couture Fall/Winter 1995 
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rebu72 · 3 years ago
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Asstonishing assets
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asstonishingxo · 7 months ago
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@𝐬𝐚𝐬𝐬𝐲.𝐛𝐮𝐧𝐧𝐲𝐲
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kavtari · 3 years ago
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“Are you a magician? When I looked at you, everyone else disappeared.” - sk
Kav gasps, slowly opening her eyes wider. "Oh my gosh," she speaks, asstonished. "Do I really look like I have control like that? Really?" Her voice lifts in excitement, having completely not understood the pick up line. "Thank you!"
Then her face drops as she looks up and stares at the knight. "You tried to hit on me with a line like that?" She smirks and moves in a little closer. "What do you call a man with a shovel?"
@orinous
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