#Arthur.....I mean.... he lived
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The boy reading with Halo font
I expect him to vanish behind closed doors with "someone" and we'll see him if he's hungry....
Or wandering.
#this is a pacer here#it looks like a great place to pace though#or making me a Grandpa#me: đ€ it's fine it is just more difficult to picture him making it#not really ... I know his blood#it's like the A-team with one OÎÎ#like our culture: hey how's it going *bang*#our culture after: smokes a cigarette like Matthew McConaughey in Teue Detective talking about time is a flat circle#me: standing in his holo cells in a small plane while at 13 14 and beyond#well my vocal chords can work baritone and bass but my spirit is a rainbow of rainbows#color? I dunno ... I don't care#if you like my dick please suck it with all your might#you're gonna need heart#you're gonna need ambition to overcome a motherload#also the sawing zip ties with feet#curious that I must say#it speaks of fun pre school times and also alludes to something dark as fuck that makes me want to kill things#I don't care if I am also the Devil...so's being alive#Arthur.....I mean.... he lived#but he's still breathing here#when I sat there and had to do dead to life math I am like 167 years sir that's a while#I am also like I have made much more progress in 45 than you did in 167 so thanks for cumming in grandma#I see him again after đ€ 23 years#understandably it took almost a full school year to catch on#mhm I used to call him air as a child of not grandpa#he was standing in the hall by my door watching my room#curious old ancestors#and *I* am the one who has to ease his pain#go the distance#bring Arthur back like a good God
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rdr fan culture is playing the game, looking at so many posts, and reading so much fanfiction that arthurâs dialect unironically starts slipping into your every day vernacular
#girl help#said âwe wasâ COMPLETELY on accident today.#iâŠ. am cringe. but i am free#why donât people say feller anymore. itâs such a perfect word#like sometimes that just ainât a guy or a dude or a bro#that thereâs a feller#same with the term âsweet onâ#itâs so cute why did people stop using that??? itâs so much better than âcrushâ#heâs sweet on him vs he has a crush on him. one is obv superior i mean cmon#rdr2#shouting into the void#arthur morgan#rdr2 arthur morgan#red dead redemption 2#i live in a part of the us where yall and ainât are common terms at least
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everyday is a fruk day here but today is especially so đ„ł
#I'm just gonna pretend I live on the other end of the world and it's still April 8th here#im so bad with deadlines omfg#anyways I like to think Arthur is telling Francis how disgustingly incompetent this new New York Times bestseller is written#which he took to read just to give young talents a chance for once (with worst expectations ofc)#i wanted to do something big and mEaNiNgFuL yk but honestly? the only thing that means to me rn is spring#please its SNOWING and was -12C yesterday can we please switch seasons finally#hetalia#hws#fruk#aph england#aph france#entente cordiale
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"Time to come home, John."
(I just think maybe the King in Yellow is big and also pretty)
(id in alt)
#I 100% designed him after a betta fish#so that means if he ever sees himself in a mirror he will smash his body into it over and over till he's mush#if only arthur knew that trick in ep 20#horsey art#malevolent#king in yellow#the king in yellow#arthur lester#john doe#also I was hc-ing that each one of those stripes was a tentacle and arthur could just climb in there and live like a clownfish#malevolent spoilers
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The problem is they both make sense.
John lacks any agency, and as his abilities start "failing" he loses more of what little he has. The only things he can do is perceive the world through Arthur's eyes and talk to him in his head. That's it. He has no material effect on the world around them. He is solely 100% reliant on Arthur for his continued existence and influence on the world. He can't ignore Arthur whatsoever (unlike Arthur who can ignore John easy peasy) he can't Do anything but talk and observe (and also experience the deaths of people Arthur touches but ultimately that does nothing). Of course he is going to be distrustful of other people and possessive over Arthur.
Arthur feels like suddenly he can't rely on this very reliable thing that has been keeping him alive this whole time. It would shake anyone up. Especially with the shit they have to deal with? If he can't rely on directions he will be sliced to ribbons or shot without a chance of fighting back. They may as well be dead already. And for all of John's lack of agency, it's Arthur who has to actually deal with the consequences. He's the one who's getting wounded and torn to bits and has to fight all that. Plus it's HIS body. If someone's existence relies on your body, you have the right to refuse, bodily autonomy is a human right.
The problem is they've gone through this cycle before (cycle of learning and forgetting and learning that they are One Unit and need to work Together vs The Problems and forgetting) but never has it shaken Arthur so much. Even when they've argued before he would still listen to John's directions. But now? Everything is in question (as is probably the intent behind John's "failing" abilities.) They DO need other people to help and they DO need to be careful and include John. They cannot truly trust someone else while keeping John a secret or without his input. Arthur has the most control over the situation and the onus is on him to make the compromises. Yeah it's his body but 1) countless times he promised to John that they were in this together and 2) at this point separating them would be so traumatic that they may as well be One.
All of this is to say, curious that Arthur is so willing to tell Oscar about literally everything EXCEPT John. What happens if he does? What if there's someone else to assert for John in a way Arthur can't ignore so easily? Would that legitimize the shared ownership of Arthur's body? What does it mean for John to gain agency by the loss of Arthur's autonomy?
#im being Bold today and not saving this in the draft#pls be nicey if you disagree#i have a lot of confusing thoughts and feelings about what bodily autonomy means when youve got a guy living in your head#that is somehow separate from yourself#malevolent#malevolent spoilers#goobabble#also to be clear I think Arthur is being complete major dickhead#i understand why he feels the way he does#or at least how i think hes feeling#and i think john would stab him if he could#slap him upside the head for being a dummy#i wouldnt blame him lol#i cant include all the intricacies of their dynamic so theres def things that may be missing here but you get it#also yeah i watched the fionna and cake finale lol#to be completely honest i dont think these guys even know what Trust is#they are all men of faith#posting before i can overthink myself into a spiral about this
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Every day I get closer to making an unhinged behemoth of a post listing all of the things about Kaeya and his possible connections to mythology & stuff that I notice but NOBODY ELSE SEEMS TO BRING UP IN THEIR THEORIES
(edit: OMG I reached the tag limit I'm so sorry)
#genshin impact#kaeya alberich#kaeya#kaeya theory#genshin impact theory#the unhinged behemoth of a post would also include all the reasons I DON'T think Kaeya is up to anything nefarious#if I see 1 more âkaeya will betray usâ or âkaeya is allied with the abyssâ theory ISTG I'm gonna break something#also WHY. WHY IS NOBODY AND I MEAN NOBODY MENTIONING THE POSSIBILITY THAT#EVEN IF KAEYA IS WORKING âWITHâ THE ABYSS ORDER#IT'S AS A DOUBLE AGENT?!?!!?#LIKE HE'S GETTING INTEL FROM THEM FOR THE PURPOSE OF FEEDING IT TO THE KNIGHTS OR TO DILUC OR SOMETHING#AND HE'S ALSO STABBING THE ABYSS ORDER IN THE BACK#IT'S A SNEAKY TACTIC THAT'S NOT EXACTLY HONOURABLE AND PUTS HIM VERY MUCH IN HARM'S WAY BUT IT'S FOR THE SAKE OF KEEPING PEOPLE SAFE#HOW IS THAT NOT THE MOST KAEYA THING EVER?!?!?#WHY AM I SEEMINGLY THE ONLY ONE THINKING ABOUT THIS?!?!?!#I FEEL LIKE I'M TAKING CRAZY PILLS#also why is no one bringing up Kaeya's possible connections to king Arthur???#I mean HELLO?! secret possible royal lineage raised as a ward/foster child/adopted child of a noble family alongside an older brother?!!#and why aren't more people talking about Kaeya's connections to Lord Krishna???#again spirited away from his actual family to be raised in another family alongside an older brother figure who has less chill than him???#not to mention peacock feather imagery and being pitted against an evil uncle#if you believe that Clothar is Kaeya's uncle rather than a direct ancestor#there is so much more I could bring up and I'm not even an expert in any of this nor am I the best at research#but I should probably save those for an actual post#plus I don't want to flood these tags more than I have#I have so so so many things to say about Kaeya#he lives in my heart rent free he makes me feel and think so much he is truly the most beloved of all my beloveds#truly the blorbo of all time for me#if even 1 person expresses interest in all my theory-esque thoughts on Kaeya I will have won at life#this is an invitation guys please ask me to talk more about kaeya
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oscar: (*random priest who seems fairly sweet and helps people as much as he can*)
me: okay seems reasonable
oscar: (*reveals that as a kid he bashed a priest's face in with a hammer for bullying/murdering his friend*)
me: (*dimming the lights and lighting candles*) COME HERE LOVERBOY-
#my outloud reaction was me saying âoh OSCARâ#in the same tone of voice john uses to say âoh ARTHURâ when he's like deeply impressed and also very turned on about it#like ngl i went from being like âwow he's cool!â to âi nEED to fuck himâ#i love sweet characters who are capable of/have committed tremendous acts of violence#bc that means the sweetness and kindness is a very conscious decision#and that should you cross them. well. let's just say you may not live to see the sun rise.#malevolent#malevolent pod#oscar malevolent#an eldritch being and his wet cat#malevolent spoilers
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Again, I havenât gone here in a long time -
But letâs talk Arthur.
He was not Uther. He was a better man and ruler than Uther but Uther forged him. Itâs very difficult to be a healthy person when the foundation of your personality is cracked - affection starved. His worse impulses enabled or encouraged. Thrown in jail for fighting with his father. Participating in massacres at fifteen. Raised since birth to hate an entire group of people.
Who does he go to when he breaks his own laws to save an elderly woman from burning alive? The father who wrote those laws. The father whose legacy was genocide. It was his destiny to undo that legacy.
Fulfilling it required him to change as a person in a way that wouldâve been incredibly painful. It wouldâve required self introspection Arthur wasnât fully capable of yet and something/several things to radically reverse his attitude toward magic. It wouldâve required facing the fact that his only parent, who he can acknowledge wasnât always good, was evil. Truly and deeply evil.
Season 5 made it clear it wouldâve happened eventually (esp. if Merlin took the opportunities given to him to push for magic to be legalized) but it was too late. He was out of time the moment Aithusa was put in that pit with Morgana.
#It doesnât matter how kind noble and well meaning Arthur was - you cannot be a just king or a good man while upholding laws like that#I said what I said#Merlinâs protection ultimately hampered him#Iâve heard/read him called a class traitor and I love the guy but he was#Arthur and Merlin have social obligations- Arthur as king & Merlin as Emrys - they do not fulfill and thatâs what gets them.#then thereâs whatever qyburn is doing#bbc merlin#merlin meta#arthur pendragon#uther pendragon#fuck uther#At some point if heâd lived all the times Arthur was a bystander an enabler or an active participant in violence against magic users wouldv#Smacked him in the face. Heâs known itâs wrong - he hasnât been nailed with the emotional horror of how wrong yet
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born to be arthur morgan,
forced to be kieran duffy.
#im not complaining#i love kieran#people need to give him more love#it hurts me on a personal level when you click greet and arthur is still mean to him#like hes just a guy leave him alone#he just wants to be liked and hes trying so hard#i cannot wait to go on the fishing trip with him because i accidentally missed it on my first play through and i dont want to do that again#live laugh love kieran duffy#rdr2#red dead redemption 2#kieran duffy#arthur morgan
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Another snippet from my Flipping the Coin au. Probably wonât make it into the actual fic, but Iâve been obsessed with these two and keep finding myself writing moments like this ^^
âŠ
Mordred was sprawled over Arthurâs chest, with his thumb tucked in his mouth, and blue eyes serious as he listened to the story with the gravity of a judge. The two of them are slumped in their favorite armchair, the red velvet blotchy from numerous spilled drinks, sticky snacks, and misguided attempts at crafts. It was too warm for a fire, but in the dim evening, with the lone table lamp for light and the window cracked open for a breath of air, it took Arthur back to countless evenings spent in another room. One built of stone and lit only by candle flame.
Aloud, Arthur read, âBecause he was the kingâŠâ
Personally, it wasnât his favorite retelling, but Mordred had seen his name on the cover and insisted on hearing it, so he had conceded. Maybe he shouldâve waited until Mordred was older before telling him that there were stories about characters who shared their names, but in these last few years, the events from long ago had been so close to mind Arthur had wanted to share it. He assumed Mordred would fixate on the sword fighting and tournaments. Instead, Mordred had picked a book that started with babies being sent out to sea.
âTwo by two, he carriedââ
Mordred pulled his thumb out of his mouth. âDid you really do that?â
âNo.â Arthur marked his spot with a finger and ruffled the thick, black curls. Still damp from the bath, they were in need of a comb. And soon, if Arthur hoped to avoid dealing with tangles. âI never did that.â Dipping his fingers to tickle the back of Mordredâs neck, he smiled as Mordred giggled and tried to escape. âI could never.â
Sitting up, Mordredâs knobby limbs found all of Arthurâs soft spots as he settled knees first on top of Arthurâs chest. âIf you had to, could you?â
âWould you,â Arthur automatically corrected.
âWould I?â Mordredâs pitch went comically high. âNooooooo! Would you!â
Arthur gave him a look, one that Mordred immediately leaned in and mimicked with a giggle. âWould I, Arthur Penn, a man far removed from the ancient past, cast a boat full of babies into the ocean? Absolutely not.â
âWhat if Merlin told you to?â
Heâd never had to. History hadnât played out like that. But Arthur couldnât tell his young son that he definitely knew it hadnât happened because he couldnât even explain his own past and all that entailed. All Mordred knew was that his father was named after King Arthur, so that meant heâd been named after Mordred. Because they were father and son and that was how it was supposed to be. He didnât know that in another life they hadnât been related and that the first time Merlin met Mordred he had helped save him.
âNope.â Arthur popped the âpâ. Out of Mordredâs sight, he set the book on the ground. It was time for a better story anyway. âNot even then.â
âWhat if Merlin did it?â
âListen, let me tell you about theââ He almost said âthe Mordred I knewâ but luckily stopped. Instead, he says, ââthe story I heard. It took place when Uther was still king. The first time Arthur met Mordred he was only a little boyâŠâ
#bbc merlin#flipping the coin#arthur pendragon#mordred#father son relationship#arthur lives au#look arthur being mordredâs father is becoming a critical component to this au#itâs helping arthur heal from his unaddressed trauma with uther#itâs also preparing arthur for the sudden reappearance of everyone he loves#sure thereâs going to be the most awkward moment ever when mordred regains his memories of his past life#and everyoneâs going to be like HUH????? when they hear mordred call arthur dad#but just picture arthur being naively oblivious to everything youâre supposed to do as a parent in the modern world#he doesnât send mordred to school until heâs about 7 or 8 because no one ever told him he was supposed to#he reads books to him that are not age appropriate because a book is a book#not to mention he wonât bat an eye at playground violence because thatâs what he did as a boy#what do you mean youâre supposed to play nice even if the other kid started it????#side note i need to come up with a tag for these two#additional note: the passages arthur is reading comes from I Am Mordred#because that seems like a book arthur would read to a young mordred without realizing the themes arenât meant for such a young child#especially when that child shares the same name as the protagonist#nothing like starting your kid out in life by reading a book that begins with their father trying to kill them
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As much as I hate verlaine, I have to admit that the man suffering in the trenches of depression after Rimbaud's death is perfect for my rimlaine.
#Everytime I think about them they make me so#They are so poetic just by existing.#like what do you mean rimbaud gave verlaine his real name and took his huh?? what do you mean he tried to help him#figure out his humanity huh?? what do you MEAN that wasn't enough and Verlaine still felt inhumane and abnormal#to the point that he didn't wantnto raise another child like him in that environment huh???#what do you mean rimbaud gave him a gift that symbolised his humanity when verlaine had already planned to betray him#AND STILL FELT UNHEARD AND UNSEEN BUT RIMBAUD WAS TRYING SO HARD AND IT WOULD'VE TAKEN A SINGLE WORD#FROM VERLAINE FOR THEM TO RUN AWAYBAND RAISE CHUUYA TOGETHER IN SOME COUNTRYSIDE IN JAPAN HUH?!!!#WHAT DO YOU MEAN EVEN IN DEATH HIS LAST WIDH WAS FOT VERLAINE TO LIVE ON WITH HIS MEMORY AND BE HAPPY HUH?!âč-3)1(3-#WHAT DO YIU MEAN VERLAINE NOW SPENDS HIS DAAYS WAITING IN THE BADEMENT FOR THE STORM THAG WILL NEVER COME ANH RA ANGQKNBBQMMJDSNANJWKSLFJUR#bungou stray dogs#rimlaine#for your sake don't read the tags#arthur rimbaud#paul verlaine
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this is a tiny pet peeve but i think its kinda odd that people seem to like. forget, or maybe just neglect to take into account, that yellow, for whatever reason (whether he's an alt universe john or a fresh piece of this universe's KIY that kayne went and ripped off) has ALSO been trapped in the dark world prior to being with arthur and has exactly as many Feelings about it. this is a very load bearing character trait imo
#the nemesis speaks#mv liveblog#malevolent spoilers#standard ''fandom hermit'' disclaimer most of my perception of common hc/characterization here is just osmosis from fics ive read#this is why i lean way more towards the ''alt timeline john'' idea than anything else#bc how does it work otherwise. did kayne grab a new piece of the king and then. stick it in the dark world to finish cooking?#i mean i wouldn't put it past him i guess it just seems like a needless logistical investment on his part#anyway more to the point. in terms of personality/character i think both of them are several layers removed from the king atp#and it's BECAUSE of the dark world. BECAUSE they went through this process of being helpless and fighting for their lives#that's why yellow is Like That. this is why he bites.#you think the king would be that goddamn defensive and scared and easily cowed by threats?? fuck no. hes better than that#relatedly i think ppl overestimate how much yellow actually remembers of being the king#and correspondingly underestimate how much the persona really is just a mask he grabbed at to defend himself from arthur#''ok you're saying that i am this thing and you hate and fear it so i'll become it and then you'll stop snapping that fucking whip at me''#like cmon. you make a guy feel so fucking lost and small and helpless and then tell him that he used to be a fucking GOD#what is he supposed to do besides lean into that idea in hopes of getting any of that power back to defend himself with??#yellow my poor lil meow meow... my sad wet cat who refuses to admit he is wet or sad...#anyway i'll stop doing character analysis in the tags now
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i love how everyone in the merlin fandom woke up and universally decided arthur was a footy kid
#except for when he's not but that isn't the point#i'm talking exclusively to myself here#i hate being australian sometimes im sorry i keep imaginging arthur playing afl or rugby league#and i know he's british meaning football is soccer#sore spot for arthur as a soccer kid who grows into a footy teen#no one can tell me i'm wrong#why is king arthur quintessentially british to the point that writing them aussie just feels blatantly wrong#modern merlin is meant to live in london or cardiff or maybe even glasgow#if not glastonbury/avalon#and nowhere else#i don't make the rules#ok i'll shut up now
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Ok but I need a post canon, Arthur returns, slow burn, Merthur, kind of fic where we can acompany our beloved king through the different stages of grief he will go through when Merlin tells him he's been dead for over 1500 years so he lost his kingdom, knights, friends and wife. A fic where we can see Merlin introducing Arthur to the 21st century and its technology that he insists is just magic, Mer-lin, I know it, I'm no fool. I know magic when I see it. A fic where we can see Arthur still struggling to fully trust on Merlin again because yes, he forgave him and he doesn't really care about the magic (except he does because Merlin's eyes look so beautiful when they are gold and where did that come from, Arthur Pendragon? Merlin, beautiful? Ha! The clotpole must've been right when he told you you shouldn't drink a third cup of that dark, strong, addictive beverage) but he still can't get over all the years of constant lies and deceiving, and Merlin feels guilty af so he tries to win his trust once again day by day and keep the promise he made to himself that day he finally confessed his magic to Arthur to not lie to him ever again. A fic full of fluffy moments between merthur where we can see them fall for each other harder slowly but surely until one day, after 3 or 4 months since Arthur came back, he finally kisses Merlin. And then they kiss some more. And more. And they are so happy grinning like idiots between kisses because finally they are on the same page. And everything is perfect. And Arthur suddenly loses his shirt somehow and things are getting heated although everything is still so soft and sweet and tentative. And then the doorbell rings. They ignore it at first, Arthur's orders, but the person behind the door is insistent so they have to stop so Merlin can go and see who it is. And when he finally opens the door, his jaw almost hit the floor because the person in front of him is no other than the fucking Queen of Camelot, his first and beloved friend, Guinevere Pendragon, the long ago dead widow of Arthur Pendragon, king of Camelot, whom he's been making out with seconds ago. And then everything goes downhill coz Gwen sees her husband and Arthur is so shocked to see her again and then they are hugging and smiling and kissing and glowing with happiness and then there's Merlin, with tears in his eyes as he sees them reunite again. As he sees Arthur reunited with his true love. And when the king finally takes a moment to process everything that is happening while having Guinevere laughing crying in his arms, his eyes find Merlin, his Merlin, the one he had in his arms minutes ago and everything comes crashing. Reality hits him so hard he can't even breathe for a second. Because he was happy with Merlin and even though he hadn't yet admitted it out loud, he knew, deep in his soul, that he was in love with him, but then Guinevere is back! His beautiful, amazing, sweet and wonderful queen who he loves with all his heart is back from the death and how is that even possible???
Phew! A fic full of drama and angst and hurt/comfort and tough decisions that Arthur will have to make eventually because he loves them both, but he only can have one and that is breaking him apart because he is a righteous man at heart and he knows that as a married man, his choice should be clear as water, but his soul is screaming at him because it wants something else, someone else, and he doesn't know what to do as he knows whatever he decides, one of the two people he loves the most in his life will end up brokenhearted. But life is unfair and cruel to everyone. Even to legendary kings.
So.
Can someone please write it?
For me???
Pretty please???
#merthur#fic prompt#i've been having this idea in my head for ages now but haven't find anything remitely similar#i could write it but it wouldn't turn out as great as it is in my head#i am desperate#i need someone to write this please#i love drama#i love angst#i love merthur#i love to respect the canon of the show but give it a little twist in a future escenario#i love the idea of arthur choosing gwen back in his camelot days but choosing merlin in the modern world#arthur loves gwen with all his heart but he also loves merlin with all his soul#true loves doesn't mean forever lovers#i also live for that moment in the fic where arthur confesses his feelings for merlin to gwen#she will be hurt but so understanding too#ok enough of the tags#this is getting out of hand#but this is how you know i've been thinking about it deeply and for way too long#please someone have mercy on this poor little untalented soul that can't write for the life of her
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There are so many different flavours of Arthurs in my mind but Iâm addicted to drawing one flavour of Arthur
#rambles#hetalia#I've always wanted to draw Arthur how sunnylolli portrays him#<--#I don't know how to describe him but he radiates so much joy and comfort and spiritually he's me#but I also want to draw him as a grumpy old man#Or draw him as a retired man who just wants to live a solitary life and sit in his garden drinking tea in his victorian country house#but I also want to draw him as a really toxic man that works in a high position at a successful multi-billion dollar company#but also prettify him and make him all young and petit and dress him in pretty dresses#and other times I want to draw him as a really creepy bloodthirsty and/or lustful man#or draw him as the main character of every horror/giallo film and tear him apart limb to limb#or draw him as a cornish man#ARGHHHHHÂ there's so many Arthurs I wish I could draw#I mean I COULD draw ALL Arthur flavours but that's going to to take a decade or two off my lifespan#edit: he'd also be your typical british mum#the list could go on
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My mother asked me âwhatâs your type?â
and I was like âhold my coffeeâ and went looking for that very specific picture of Colin Morgan from bbc the living and the dead where he has peak Mr Darcy aesthetic
#you all know the one I mean#Iâm sure that picture spawned many Arthur returns in Victorian area fics#sure Iâve never watched that show because I donât like horror but sometimes Iâm very tempted because he looked fantastic in it#i see that photo and go oh look itâs Merlin cosplaying as Mr. Darcy!!#merlin bbc#colin morgan#bbc merlin#merlin tv#the living and the dead
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