#Anyway I don't know where I was going with this one
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just-sg · 3 hours ago
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If the community doesn't welcome "cis men", then it excludes transmascs who pass or at bare minimum sends a message that the goal they worked so hard to achieve has made them less welcome in spaces that once supported them, actively punishing them for transitioning. It forces transfems to out themselves, which can be especially dangerous. It forces nonbinary amabs who can't or don't want to change their presentation to out themselves and sends a message that nonbinary people owe you androgyny or visual non-conformity. And if you think you can gauge any of these things by looking at someone, you're not doing the community any favors.
If the community doesn't welcome cis men, it excludes gay men. If men are welcome only when in a relationship with another man/person who reads enough like "a man", it excludes bi/pan/etc men and sends a message that what relationship they're in Right Now determines whether or not they're Queer Enough, you know, one of the core tenets of biphobia and erasure.
If the community doesn't welcome cis men, it excludes men all over the ace and aro spectrums. :) And yes actually, the heterosexual aromantic straw-man does deserve to be here just as much as anyone else. IF he's treating his partners like shit, then we judge him for that behavior, but queer people can be douchebags with shit views and we don't get to say they're not still queer. And if the het-aro dude is instead communicating honestly and being respectful-- a thing I promise is fully possible for humans to do-- then guess what, assuming he couldn't possibly be a decent person is just arophobia and maybe a side of puratinism.
Anyone questioning their identity, anyone who isn't actively questioning yet but later will, guys about to experience bi panic, transfem eggs who haven't clocked anything about themselves yet. Their early exposure to queer spaces being a hostile one is not going to help anyone, and can easily actively discourage people. We also need to be welcoming of supportive partners, siblings, parents, friends, etc, especially in cases where a queer person is disabled or otherwise has trouble going places on their own, or for helping ease anxiety in virtual spaces, etc.
Listen.
The nature of Being A Man is not and has never been the problem. And as much as some of you don't want to hear it, and as much as it fucking sucks and is objectively unfair when it does involve men who are participating in and benefiting from oppression, trying to turn the tables is never going to be an effective strategy. It's "not fair" that it's more dangerous for women to walk alone at night either but you hopefully wouldn't advocate against carrying mace on the basis no one "should" need it. Whether something is fair and whether it's true are not the same thing.
You cannot Get Revenge against a whole huge portion of the human population, and when you actively threaten or ostracize people, (a) you're mirroring the very thing you fight against, but (b) it makes people defensive!!! Some allocishet dudes would get defensive anyway at the idea of not being on top of the ladder anymore, but giving them more fuel won't change that. Dudes who'd have that kneejerk reaction but could be reasoned with won't be if no one bothers to try, or oftentimes even if someone bothers but it's immensely overshadowed with hostility. And people who were already allies can actively be pushed out and turned against the cause. (Not to mention perpetuating in-fighting.)
You catch more flies with honey, I'm sorry. And yes, we do need allies. Perpetuating the "us vs them" mentality helps no one, patriarchy does not target men in the same or as many ways as women but it is also harmful to many, and we will always have a better chance of fixing any system when we have people working for the cause inside and out. People using their positions of privilege to help provide extra leverage and voice to those with less privilege is always going to be desirable overall.
Even mainstream media writers throwing in crumbs of badly handled representation isn't without some merit, if only for proving it's not illegal and won't destroy sales to have Anything At All, which couldn't be said mere decades ago; if only for normalizing that queer people exist even the tiniest bit more. But just, normal people going about their normal lives. Just every random man who will frown at their coworker's homophobic joke and give a simple "not cool dude". Those little things adding up are important. When people hate you, it's easy to ignore you standing up for yourself, and harder to ignore people they like also standing up for you.
Cis queer men are not your enemy. Amabs who "read" cis to you and don't want to out themselves are not your enemy. Bi men who happen to be in relationships with women are not your enemy. Straight male partners of queer women are not your enemy! Allo cishet dudes married to allo cishet women with no queer kids or siblings or anything are not your enemy, not if they're behaving like friends.
People operating on ignorance, especially to a point of willful ignorance because they don't 'have' to deal with it, can be enemies-- inaction in the face of oppression is taking the side of oppressors, and all-- but even they're like... minion enemies if that makes sense. (That goes for men, women, questioning folks or folks who are definitively queer but don't feel like Part Of The Community, etc, to be clear.) It's not your personal job to educate every person, but when you can afford to, taking no shit but remaining civil will leave someone else a better chance of getting through to them. Picking a nasty drawn-out fight with that jackass on Twitter won't fix homophobia but may well increase his devotion to the enemy cause.
Prioritizing defense isn't always an option and I'm not saying it is. Sometimes you need whole riots to make a point, but even that involves group effort, and often times lashing out in your personal daily life can do more harm than good. THIS SUCKS. OF COURSE IT SUCKS. But it's a matter of the big picture. It's not about letting people "get away with" anything, it's about expressing disapproval in a calmer and more casual manner while trying to minimize anything they could twist into an excuse to be worse.
And that's with people who ARE actively shitty, the ones more casual and micro-aggressive about it but still ultimately against us. Lashing out pre-emptively on the assumption that people would be shitty does a lot more harm and no longterm good.
People joke about The Gay Agenda but honestly, yeah. The Agenda is ultimately for the queer community as a whole to be accepted, have the same rights and protections as anyone else, to end oppression, etc, right? Sometimes that's gonna mean dealing with being uncomfortable or uncertain or even biting your tongue in the name of forwarding the Agenda. Especially when it's literally about acceptance within our own communities. How can we reasonably expect everyone else to accept us if we're struggling to accept each other?
i don't care how uncomfortable you are around cis men, queer cis men still need places to go, and sometimes, those spaces will be shared with yours. disabled and neurodivergent queer men and queer men of color especially need a place to go. the queer community isn't the "fuck cis men" community. that is the rad fem community. if you think cis men and people who read as cis men are inherently "too scary" or shouldn't be allowed in queer spaces, you joined the wrong community.
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vaguely-concerned · 10 hours ago
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the contrast in lucanis' early game responses to bellara and davrin are sooo funny and also quietly devastating. the vibe is like
BELLARA: heey so... how are you feeling lucanis? generally, I mean. or specifically, if you'd rather talk about something in particular! well, you usually don't, so no worries if not, you know, no pressure, only if you'd think it'd maybe, I don't know, help! I know it doesn't always. but ah, um... are you -- alright? (in the pantry. we should probably stop asking you about this but are you sure you're alright in there? it's where the parsnips live. and you now, too, I suppose! just... you and the onions. and a demon. sorry, didn't mean to remind you! you see I'm only asking because um for a second there I thought the dark circles under your eyes were actually bruises and it jumpscared me a bit)
LUCANIS (tired but soft): I'm fine, Bellara. Really. Don't worry about me.
VS.
DAVRIN: So hey lucanis. just out of interest. what the fuck is your damage anyway. why are you like this
LUCANIS (at his most 'orders one black coffee and drives away' and also honest): Well you see Davrin since you're asking: I am in hell. Also go fuck yourself.
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myth1cs · 2 days ago
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Deal of Lust (Im Nayeon x M!Reader)
Remastered version of my first smut because it SUCKS. (I'll give Nayeon a new smut ... eventually ... maybe)
Word Count: 1,309
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Walking into school you walked around with caution making sure you didn't bump into a certain someone.
You were almost to your first period class but before you reached it you were grabbed and brought into an empty classroom.
"If I didn't know any better I'd think you were trying to avoid me."
"What no, I'm just really tired."
"Mhm, Anyways Y/N I trust you did my pre-calculus work."
"Actually I was studying for my exam last night so I wasn't able to finish it."
"You piece of shit!"
Nayeon smacked you and you fell to the floor. She grabbed you by your hair and lifted your head up.
"It's due today. Since you didn't finish it your going to pay."
Nayeon was about to hit you and you raised your hand in order to block her punch but before she hit you the sound of the doorknob twisting made Nayeon let go of you.
"Is there someone in here?"
The person who stepped through the door was the president of student council Park Jihyo.
"Oh Y/N you're so clumsy you have to stop falling down." Nayeon started caressing your face and helped you stand up.
"What are you guys doing in here?"
"Me and Y/N wanted to study on our own so we came in here. We were just about to leave but Y/N tripped and fell to the floor."
"Is this true Y/N."
You looked at Jihyo wanting to tell the truth but when you turned to look at Nayeon she gave you a "I'll kill you if you tell her." look.
"Yeah, I fell down I'm kinda clumsy like that."
"Okay well you guys can't be in a classroom without a teacher present so I'm advising you guys to go to the library if you want to study."
"Understood president Park, it won't happen again. Right Y/N?"
"R-right."
Once you all left the room Nayeon waited for Jihyo to be out of sight before she spoke to you.
"You're lucky she came in when she did. Have my homework done by 5th period or you'll regret it, got that?"
"Yes Nayeon."
She turned around and walked to her first period class leaving you in the hallway.
"Damn it why do I let myself get pushed around by her?"
Im Nayeon was the popular girl in school. Even saying that is an understatement she is what many saw as the person every student should aspire to be like. However you're the only one who knows the "real" Nayeon.
Once she realized you were the highest performing in school she started bullying you into doing her work and giving her test answers. She used the threat of beating your ass to keep you in check.
Reporting her would do nothing as everyone including staff had a false view of her and wouldn't take you seriously so you never bothered to do so.
You really wanted to finish her homework to avoid being punished but you were busy in every class. 1st period you had the exam you were studying for last night, 2nd period you had to work on a lab, 3rd period you were working on a project, and 4th period you had to help your art teacher set up for an after school event in the gym.
As the bell for fifth period came you tried to get to your class as fast as possible before Nayeon could find you. You settled for the longer path to your class assuming that Nayeon would assume you would take the shorter path to get to your class quicker.
However you didn't anticipate that she would correctly guess your actions and you saw her standing in the hallway as you turned the corner. "Oh shit!"
You tried turning around to run but before you could Nayeon grabbed you and brought you into the janitors closet.
"Where's my homework loser?"
"I don't have it!"
"Is that so? You know what happens now."
"No wait Nayeon please I'll do anything! Just please don't hit me."
"Anything I want?"
"Yes! Anything, just please don't hit me."
Nayeon grabbed your chin and made you face her. Laying your eyes on her you felt as if her demeanor changed from the one that was present just a moment earlier.
"You know Y/N there is one way you could make it up to me."
She put her fingers on the waistband of her pants and pulled her pants down.
"Wh-what are you doing?"
Once her pants were all the way down you noticed her pink pantie she was wearing but quickly averted your eyes.
"What's wrong Y/N? Do you not like what you see?"
You were unable to say to get words out of your mouth but eventually you were able to muster out a sentence "Please put your clothes back on."
"Don't be such a baby Y/N. Now look at me or I'll punish you."
Turning around to look at Nayeon you tried your best to focus on her face but you couldn't help yourself from trying to get a quick glance at her pantie.
"Go on Y/N stare at my clothed pussy." She put her finger inside her pantie and started to finger herself.
You watched her finger herself and felt your cock grow.
"Y/N if you fuck my pussy everyday then I'll stop bullying you."
"R-really?" You were surprised that her compromise was really lewd.
"Is that a yes or should I beat your face in now?"
Well who were you to deny her?
Walking up to Nayeon you pushed her to the wall and lowered yourself so you were facing her pantie.
"Go on give yourself a better view Y/N."
Putting your fingers on her pantie and dragging it down you got a clear view of Nayeon's wet pussy. Without hesitation you inserted your tongue into her pussy. She let out loud moans but covered her mouth quickly as to not draw attention to the closet both of you were in.
"Gah ~ ah ~ ah"
Hearing the noises coming from her made you want to go faster. You lapped every single inch of her pussy you could get your tongue on.
Nayeon took her shirt off and made quick work of her bra. Her breasts were now out in full display. She started to pinch and twist her nipples for further stimulation.
Pulling out of her sweet pussy you went up and kissed her letting her get a taste of herself. "Mhm ~ you're such a good kisser Y/N."
You reached for her pussy with your fingers and fingered Nayeon. She moaned into your mouth and you decided to explore her mouth with your tongue.
Nayeon felt overstimulated from everything she was experiencing and ended up cumming all over your fingers. So much cum came out that some dripped onto the floor.
"Agh ~ Y/N ... so ... good."
You licked the fluid she sprayed on your fingers: licking every last drop. "Do I taste good Y/N?"
"Yes Nayeon you taste amazing."
"Lucky for you you'll be able to taste this every day."
....
"Should we leave?"
"Probably not school staff is likely roaming the hallways looking for us since we haven't reported to our fifth period."
"So what now Nayeon?"
"We could just fuck until sixth period."
No words needed to be exchanged for her to know that you wanted to take her up on that offer.
The janitors closet was once again filled with moans for the rest of the period.
...
Jihyo was making her way to the bathroom and was passing by the janitors closet when she heard a moan. It was low but loud enough for her to hear.
She slowly crept towards it and laid on the floor to look inside from the crack under the door.
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I prefer this over what I wrote originally. I'd like to think I've improved since I started writing and hopefully that continues.
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hvbris · 3 days ago
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𝐓𝐇𝐄𝐎 & 𝐕𝐈𝐎𝐋𝐄𝐓 @multipleoccupancy
Samantha laughed. She knew Sloane was speaking fondly of Killian. Besides, he was right. "You have a point," she admitted, "we'll just keep it in my car. Like that, he can use it whenever we're on the mission, and he won't be grounded by his parents for showing up at home with a crossbow." She smiled. "I don't mind at all. It could be useful to have a crossbow in the car, anyway. There are a lot of bears where I live." Which had absolutely horrified Killian when she'd told him about it.
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"If we can get the key to an empty dorm, she might be able to lock herself inside. Like that no one can bother her, and she'll be safer, too." She glanced at Violet, carefully assembling the very dangerous crossbow she was going to use. "We can decide on a codeword, so she'll know it's us when we knock on the door." Once the monster would be safely caught and brought to a discreet location.
Violet could tell that Theo was still rattled, but she continued her explanations, hoping it would help him be grounded again. After a moment he did start to watch what she was doing. She was helping, right? She thought of her dad, how she had broken him when she'd told him she was Mauve, and her chest tightened. "Once the bowstring is through the pulley, it can actually be stretched," she explained very gently.
Finally, he spoke, and relief washed over her. Not only was he talking again, but he was nice to her, too. "Thank you," she croaked, moved by his words. He didn't want anything to happen to her. "A lot has happened, but good things happened too."
She smiled. He was trying to comfort her, despite his rigidity towards rituals. "Thank you for understanding. It means a lot to me." With the string now put through the pulleys, she demonstrated how the bowstring could stretch. "I think rituals are like cheating. Cultists are lazy. I can make light just fine without a ritual. All I need is a potato, a few wires and coins, and a light bulb."
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"And I can make a crossbow too," she concluded with a smile.
Sloane scoffed playfully, "Killian won't leave anything he thinks is cool in a green box. It was hard enough to get him to relinquish the car keys for this trip let alone a crossbow." It was still said fondly though, Sloane may have even understood Killian's preference for keeping cool looking things. He was young once too. Surprised at the offer for her to keep it instead, Sloane smiled over to her, grateful. His children were only young but they were in the car a lot with him, he would be running a risk. "If you wouldn't mind," he encouraged. He knew she understood he had children, while it was technically a 'secret' it was inevitable that she and Killian would put the pieces together.
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As their talk turned to business though he smile did fade even as his patience and tone remained ever the same. He trusted both Samantha and Killian to do their jobs well, they'd catch the monster that night and hopefully the trap would mean a significant advantage for them. "Yes, I think we can place her in one of the dorm buildings, but it puts her at risk of being disturbed." He hummed thoughtfully, "hopefully though with the crossbow being quiet, she will be fine."
Theo let her have the pulley without a fight, though he was still looking to his now empty hand as she talked to him. Deep in thought about how it was any version of him would turn into a cultist. He had no context of course but he couldn't help but try and come up with the answer in vain. His eyes did eventually drift as she started showing him how to attach the pulley and how it was going to work. At least part of his mind focusing on what she was saying while the other part drifted off into dark thoughts on what could happen should he ever have to do a ritual. Was it addictive?
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You're not him. You're not him. You're not him. You're not him. It ran through his mind, getting altered and corrected as it went and he sat quietly watching what Violet was doing. She still loved the life she had regardless of the chaos of it all and the exposure she had faced. He wasn't sure if he should be impressed or worried.
"I'm glad you came out of it all alright you know," he said honestly and at last. "I don't want anything to happen to you, but it sounds like so much has happened to you anyway." He thought quietly for a moment about rituals and their tolls, wondering if the other version of him, the cultist, could withstand that toll or how it was he tolerated it if that was what he had put his life towards. "You shouldn't feel guilty though." He then said quietly, "I mean... I don't like rituals and I don't think they should ever be used, I will never use one but I get why you had to and I'm sorry that some cultist forced you into that. That really sucks."
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demonpiratehuntress · 10 hours ago
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bug trouble (Straw Hats + Ace, Law, Kaku)
featuring - Zoro x F!Reader, Ace x F!Reader, Sanji x F!Reader, Luffy x F!Reader, Law x F!Reader, Kaku x F!Reader, Usopp x F!Reader
summary - you ask them to remove a spider because you are afraid.
warnings - none
a/n - im approaching 1k followers, so as a thank you to all of you, whom i greatly appreciate ❤, please let me know what you think i should do as a special event!
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ZORO
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Zoro is woken up from yet another attempted nap by the sound of two very familiar screams. He groans, already knowing what that entails, but forces himself up anyway because one of those screams came from you.
Sure enough, when he walks into the dining area he sees you and Usopp on top of the table, holding onto each other and shaking as you cried. This earned another sigh from the swordsman, who almost didn't want to ask what was going on.
You didn't give him a choice, wailing, "There's a spider on the floor!"
Zoro heaved another sigh. If it was just Usopp, he'd have left him on his own until one of the other crewmembers took pity on him. But it was you as well, and he promised to protect you, so...
"Where is it?"
"There!" Usopp pointed.
"Where?"
"Turn around!"
He turned to the left.
"No, completely around!"
He did a 180, ending up facing the right now.
"Zoro!" You cried. "Take this seriously!"
"I am! But I don't see it!"
You opened your mouth to say something, but stopped short when the massive bug climbed onto the kitchen table with you and the sharpshooter. Usopp promptly fainted, and you screamed and fell off the table.
Now catching sight of the spider, Zoro stalked over and just casually impaled it with one of his swords, before going outside and dropping it into the ocean. When he returned, you got up happily like nothing had happened and ran over to hug him, squeezing him in your arms.
"Thank you!!" You beamed, kissing his cheek before rejoining Usopp and continuing whatever conversation you'd been having with him before the spider came.
"No," Zoro grabbed your wrist and pulled you away, "For that, you have to nap with me."
"You say that like it's a punishment," you laughed.
He did not let you go for the rest of the day.
ACE
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Truth be told, there were a lot of people aboard the Moby Dick that you could ask to get rid of the spider. Literally anyone passing by. But your predicament right now needed Ace specifically, because you were hiding in your bathroom with nothing on but a towel wrapped around your figure.
Someone had heard your cry for Ace and retrieved your boyfriend, who raced to your room when he heard you needed him. He burst into your shared room with misplaced enthusiasm, thinking of a completely different need.
"Ace?" You called, and you sounded like you were scared.
"Baby? What's wrong?" He asked worriedly, rushing over to the door. "Are you okay?"
"No!" You cried, "There's a spider in the room!"
"Huh? A spider?" He repeated, then saw something crawl across the floor. "Babe that thing is huge! You're on your own."
"ACE!" You yelled. "I swear to-"
"Relax, I was kidding," he laughed. "I'll handle it baby. Sit tight."
You had no idea what he did with it, hopefully he threw it overboard, but you opened the bathroom door just a sliver to take a peek. Ace was just coming back into the room, and you watched him approach the door.
"Okay, you can come out now baby," he cooed. "It's gone."
You sighed in relief and opened the door completely, wrapping your boyfriend up in the tightest hug you'd ever given him. Your towel slipped, but you didn't care.
"It was so big," you complained into his neck. "My hero."
He puffed his chest out proudly, engulfing you in his strong arms, "Anything for my pretty baby. But I think I deserve some kisses."
"I think so too," you smiled when you pulled back, then proceeded to pepper kisses all over his face, ending with a deep, slow and loving kiss on his lips.
SANJI
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The moment your scream rang out through the ship, the cook dropped whatever he had been doing to rush to your aid. He was panicked himself upon hearing your cry for help, wondering what had gotten to you while everyone was busy. When he burst into your room, you were on your bed, curled up in the furthest corner against the wall.
"My love, what happened?" Sanji asked you worriedly, coming closer. "Are you hurt?"
"No. Just scared," you told him, trembling slightly.
"Why are you scared? Is there something in your room?" But even as he asked that question, he scanned your room and couldn't find what might have gotten this reaction out of you.
"There's a spider on the wall behind you," you offered weakly.
Your boyfriend turned around to see what must have been the biggest spider he had ever encountered. Now he understood your reaction. He, too, trembled in fear at the sight. But he was your boyfriend, he needed to protect you.
"Sanjiiiiii!" You whined when he just stood there. "It's moving!"
"Have no fear my love, I will take care of it!"
And then he ran out of the room. Leaving you to cry, terrified by the fact that now your boyfriend had abandoned you. Stupid, huge spider.
Sanji came running back in moments later, however, holding a pan. You gape at him, wondering how that was supposed to help, before he threw it at the massive eight-legged creature. This only pissed it off, and it started moving. Sanji screamed, grabbed you and sprinted out of the room again.
"Sanji!"
"I have a plan b!"
His plan b was, in fact, Nami. She had to go in and remove the spider, and Sanji felt terrible. He failed you as a boyfriend.
"Thanks for at least trying," you laughed when you finally calmed down, kissing his cheek. "It was pretty brave of you, considering you're also afraid of them."
His eyes bugged out of his head, heart-shaped, "Anything for you, my love!"
LUFFY
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When Luffy heard you crying for his help he thought that you were being attacked. He rushed to help you, because you never cried for help like that unless you were truly terrified. And when he got to where you were, in the bathroom, he stopped dead when he saw you in the corner with your towel around your body, staring at something in the sink.
"(Name), what's wrong?" He asked you, confused. He didn't see an immediate threat.
"Look in the sink," you answered, voice shaky.
Your captain approached the sink, his eyes going wide when he spotted the spider, "Oooh, cool!"
"Luffy!" You cried. "Get it out of here!"
"But why?" He turned to look at you. "It can't hurt you."
"Luffy please!" You squealed, curling up into yourself and hiding your face. "You know I hate spiders!"
He pouted, not seeing the problem, but since you were so bothered by it he picked up the spider like it was nothing, and turned to you. You screamed and fainted on the spot, and Luffy panicked. He ran out and threw the spider overboard before running back to you.
"(Name)!" He picked you up and shook you, thinking that would wake you up.
You did wake up, but not when he shook you. He had taken you to Chopper, towel and all, and you screeched as you sat up and covered yourself, "Luffy!"
"(Name)!" He grinned, "You're awake!"
"You brought me here in my towel?!"
"I was worried!" He answered. "Besides, Chopper didn't look. He told me you just fainted and would wake up soon."
"You showed me a spider," you shivered. "Of course I fainted."
"I'm sorry," he apologised sincerely. "I won't do it again."
"You better not."
LAW
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You try to keep your terror to yourself, not wanting to bother or irritate Law. He was busy, so you figured you had to do this yourself. It was absolutely horrifying, sitting on the table and staring at the eight-legged creature you would eventually have to remove.
Bepo was your saving grace, or at least you thought so until he also got scared and quickly left the room. Fortunately, he ran into Law who was looking for you, and told the captain that a spider was holding you hostage.
"A...spider," Law repeated incredulously, then sighed and made his way to the room you were stuck in. "Where is it?"
You were too busy trying to throw your shoes at it that you hadn't noticed Law enter. He frowned when he saw your eyes glistening and your form trembling.
"(Name)-ya."
You finally looked up, sighing in relief when you saw him, "Please help me, Law."
You sounded so terrified, that your boyfriend found it difficult to be annoyed. You didn't have to be afraid, you shouldn't be, not when you have him around. So, worried that you might pass out from fear, he just room, shambled it into the ocean, a shell taking its place on the floor.
You finally breathed, relaxing as you got off the table, "Thank you, Law. I'm sorry for disturbing you."
He came over to you and, in a rare display of affection, hugged you and kissed the top of your head. He said nothing, but his actions comforted you and you slowly calmed down.
And in that moment you knew he would always be there to help you, regardless of what he was doing. That proved his love, better than words ever could.
KAKU
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Kaku returned home to find you were not in the kitchen like you usually were, ready to greet him with dinner and a kiss. In fact, dinner hadn't even been started, and this struck Kaku as extremely odd. Cautiously, he made his way upstairs only to hear things being thrown around and multiple crashes and thuds.
He burst into the room thinking you were under attack, only to see you running around room crying and tossing things over your shoulder. He couldn't see anything wrong, until he looked down and noticed a massive spider following you.
"Kaku!" You sobbed in relief when you spotted him. "Can you please get rid of this demon?"
He chuckled at your name for it, "Of course, sweetheart."
Your eyes almost bugged out of your head as he, with absolutely no hesitance, bent down and grabbed the spider by its legs. He stood up with it and you yelped and tumbled backwards onto your bed as he took the eight-legged creature outside.
"Is that better?" He smiled at you sweetly when he returned.
"Much," you smiled back, relaxing again, "Thank you, baby." You got up and walked over to him, kissing him sweetly. "Now let me go make you the biggest, best dinner you've ever had."
"I'll help," he offered, ever the sweetheart.
"No, no, no," you shook your head, taking his hand and leading him downstairs. "My hero gets to sit there and look handsome."
He chuckled again, his cheeks going pink at the praise.
USOPP
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This guy...is on the table with you. Seriously, when you screamed and he came running, he took one look at the floor before he jumped so high that he ended up with you on the table. He was shivering and shaking more than you were, and you gave him an 'are you kidding me' look.
"Hey! Those things are freaky!" He defended himself.
You rolled your eyes, "Okay, but now who's going to save us?"
"...I didn't think this through."
"No, you did not."
The two of you sat there for a while, wondering who you could call and who would actually come help if you did. Meanwhile, the spider stayed where it was, taunting you both.
"I mean I could...hit it with a flaming star?" He suggested.
"And risk burning the floor? And the ship?"
"Right..."
"Throw something else at it," you told him. "Ooh, throw your shoe."
"I'm not throwing my shoe! You throw yours!"
"You were the one who got us in this situation!"
"But you-"
Robin walked into the room at that moment, only to stop when she noticed the two of you cowering on the table. She looked at the spider, then at you two, and laughed.
"Do you guys need some help?"
"Yes please!" You both begged.
Robin used her devil fruit power to get the spider out, making a trail of arms that eventually led overboard.
"Thanks, Robin," you smiled, which she returned before leaving. You whirled on Usopp, about to ask what that was when you noticed how pale he had gone. "Come on, let's go get your mind off the spider."
You took his hand and led him away, shaking your head.
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fluffyk97 · 3 days ago
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Sonic 3 spoiler rambling about Sonic and Shadow under cut !
Y'know something that I feel might go lil under-appreciated is how well they made Sonic and Shadow mirror each other in the movie.
Like something that always can easily irk me are people boasting one of the two over the other because from the very beginning of his introduction to the series, Shadow's character is meant to reflect Sonic. They're meant to be equals that are so similar and complete opposites at the same time.
With the movie, I honestly wasn't expecting it that much. Sonic actually has a backstory that is just like Shadow's: powerful little hedgehog that is wanted for his power, so the one he's known his whole small life that he loves sacrifices herself to save him.
I fr fully expected Sonic to learn about Maria and be like "I lost Longclaw, I know you're pain, but-" blah blah blah- BUT they don't do that??
Of course, we have Commander Walters first telling Sonic that Shadow's story is a lot like his but wasn't able to find family and friends, and Sonic does find Shadow had a family from finding a picture of him and Maria together. He never gets told what happened exactly though, although it wouldn't make too much of a difference with the fact they did change up Shadow losing Maria just a little bit.
Since they didn't live up in space, Maria didn't have a capsule to send Shadow off with sacrificing herself and instead they made it an accident. WHICH- can be understandable if people don't like that, however personally I don't mind it that much because honestly the intent to shoot Maria was there, but she ended up being lost from an accident caused by Walters.
Which, ties in to Shadow hurting Tom...
Walters in trying to help save Maria's, Shadow's and Gerald's lives unfortunately led to Maria's death and watching Shadow be put in stasis for 50 years where all he thinks about is that painful memory burned fresh in his head. So of course when Shadow sees Tom disguised as Walters, he takes his anger out on him by hurting him while also stealing the key for the ARK. Leading to unfortunately another scenario of where the intent of harm is there, but someone still got hurt from an accident because Shadow never really meant to hurt Tom. But he does anyway..
Which of course in turn, makes Sonic mad just like Shadow was 50 years ago. Only difference is Sonic doesn't get immediately captured by GUN and forced into stasis. Letting him able to go straight to Shadow afterwards for hurting his family.
We have Shadow take note of all of that himself, telling Sonic he's feeling exactly the pain he felt and Sonic being the one to say "I'm nothing like you!". Just like how I thought Sonic would tell Shadow about Longclaw in hopes of redeeming him, but reversed and both sides full of anger and grief.
One awesome super fight later though, we come to the talk on the moon. Probably my favorite part in the whole movie. outside of the super fights and Live and Learn playing lol
After mentioning Tom and getting uppercutted straight to the moon by Sonic, Shadow loses his super form, leaving him vulnerable, easy for Sonic to take his revenge on him. Only for all of that to be stopped because of Shadow pointing at his own chest which reminds Sonic what Tom told him at the beginning of the movie and calm down.
"You didn't let pain change who you are."
This completely baffles Shadow, with him actually wanting Sonic to finish it, but of course Sonic just refuses saying "No one wins with revenge". It just leaves silence between them, finally giving Shadow his own moment of remembering Maria outside of her death by looking at the stars he used to gaze upon with her.
He mentions it to Sonic how all he knew and felt was just the pain, and now finally- FINALLY, Sonic mentions how he shares that feeling of loss from Longclaw. Not in a moment of trying to just redeem Shadow without the full weight of it, but in a moment of understanding.
A strong moment of these two looking at each other in a mirror, eye to eye. Sonic, who was allowed to grieve all those years ago after losing Longclaw, telling Shadow the pain of loss will never go away, but the love will always remain.
"The light shines, even though the star is gone."
And through that shared pain and loss, now coupled with empathy and understanding one another through it. They truly connect.
Sonic and Shadow's dynamic was just done SO WELL in the movie and I couldn't be happier with it...
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hitlikehammers · 2 days ago
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oh golden boy (don't act like you were kind)
part i : you were mine but—
for @kultiras at the ❄️ Winter @steddieexchange 🖤🩵
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Arguably the sharpest knife in his chest about this whole fucking shitshow?
Eddie thought they were doing good.
Like: so fucking good.
Eddie thought they were on the cusp of…that they were building something.
He’s such an idiot. Such a…
A heartsick fucking idiot.
But if he’s gracious—which he’s not, least of all to himself—when he puts all the pieces together, lines the evidence up and analyzes it, thinks of it in terms of a narrative that he can understand and recognize the flaws in, where he’d rewrite the ending or tweak the rising action so everything slides into place realistically, cause and effect in balance just right: Eddie can see that the way this has all shaken out is fucked up. So, so fucked up.
Because there honestly hadn’t been any signs that they weren’t laying the foundations of something long-term, something lasting; that they weren’t in this deep and rooted, strong and committed and serious in a real, tangible way, and, just…
Forever. Eddie was…he was playing for keeps, here. He thought, he just, he thought—
Fuck.
He just…really believed he wasn’t alone in it all.
Again: idiot.
It’d started so fucking predictably, really, because if there’s one thing that Eddie clocked about Steve Harrington from the get-go of actually getting to know him versus operating on the popular-gorgeous-jock framework he’d distilled the guy down to in his head before 1986: the one consistent thing he’d figured from what he’d heard and what he’d seen put together was that: Steve Harrington?
Bastard’s protective to a fucking fault.
So when he blinked back to the land of the living with Steve goddamn Harrington at his bedside? Standing guard, looking a little haggard—like he cared, at least enough to worry—but still fucking devastatingly pretty, good god-
When he woke up to that, Eddie was surprised and also: not at all surprised.
The way he lit up when he saw Eddie was conscious, like world was less before that moment and something right slid back into place? Eddie…Eddie felt like his body was pretty wholly broken but that fucking cracked something down his middle, decimated parts of him in new ways that hadn’t been already devastated on another plane, were sitting ripe for wholesale ruin.
He’d let Steve blame the breathiness that’d overcome him on coming back from the brink of death, because Steve didn’t need to know the sensations, the emotions, that were running riot through Eddie’s veins.
But then it hadn’t stopped.
Steve standing guard at his side became a constant, like Eddie couldn’t quite comprehend save that it felt like his body was knitting itself around the fact of this more-than-good dude and Eddie wasn’t entirely sure what to do with that, save kind of just…poke curiously at the new shape of everything he was for it, and once he worked through the fear of the unfamiliar in it?
To kinda…savor it. Roll around in it and relish.
Probably it was gonna be short lived anyway. Probably it was gonna go away when Eddie finally got out of here. Only made sense to soak it up while it lasted.
And it was one of those early days, where Eddie was soaking it up and before anything possible beyond the bubble of middle-space they were existing in inside Eddie’s hospital room was even hinted at. Steve had gone to check on Max while Eddie grappled a bit to look down at himself a little better under the handkerchief that the hospital deemed sufficient as clothing, and he braced for the worst because it felt like the worst and what he did remember at all from the scene of the inter-dimensional mauling definitely aligned with being ‘the worst’: but it was honestly mostly bandages and pain.
Eddie didn’t…on second thought he didn’t know if he was ready to see what was underneath just yet, so he was actually kinda grateful that his hubris about it all didn’t immediately have a chance to floor him, especially when he was alone because he’d thought it’d be easier to stomach if it was just him—but the prospect, the bullet dodged, lodged in his throat and proved him kinda instantly wrong for the sharp cut of bile rising in him, and the violent jump of his pulse right behind it.
His hand had gravitated to his chest, though, like he could keep his heart from cracking his ribs that way, and he noticed that…even the light pressure ached, so he looked down a little more carefully, didn’t think the little fuckers had concentrated their attacks on the center of his chest so he tucked his chin and tried to see what was causing the sting—maybe just like, general area tenderness after playing buffet table to fucking…flying hellspace rodents but—
No. No: even from this weird-ass uncomfortable angle, Eddie could see the outline, coukd make out the dark stain of a bruise.
In the shape of a hand.
And listen, Eddie wasn’t foolish. He knew that everyone busted ass to get him topside and to a hospital. And that probably involved…stuff he didn’t want to really dwell on too long in terms of the nitty-gritty of his own mortality. He was also very much aware that Steve had played a crucial role, even if the man himself didn’t stand up and declare it. The kids didn’t have any sense of a fucking filter, so.
Eddie knew.
But Eddie then started tracing the splay of fingers on his sternum, his heartbeat so fucking heavy under even just the brush of his nails as he followed the outline of the purpling over, and over, and over, imagined what it would take to make that kind of an impression on his skin because Eddie was fucking pale, yeah, he marked quick—but not that dark.
Not that deep.
“Shit.”
Eddie’d startled, snapped his attention to the doorway where Steve had reappeared, looking a little breathless as he took Eddie in, came quick to his side and leaned to look closer at the monitor next to him and oh: Eddie hadn’t realized that the beeping was so loud, so fast. Hadn’t realized his heartbeat had ratcheted up quite so high.
Not that he was surprised.
“Shit, are you okay,” Steve barely breathed, eyes so goddamn big about it as his hands had kinda hovered, as he’d tried to figure out what to do, how to help, because that was what he was always doing; that’s who he was to his core, and Eddie…
“Oh god, let me call the nu—”
“Don’t.”
Eddie’d half-moaned it, god: scratchy but desperate as he reached for Steve’s hand and he…
He suspected he knew exactly how big that hand was; what shape it’d make to a fucking T. But he needed to see
For sure.
“What are you,” Steve’s brow had furrowed in that way Eddie was becoming increasingly aware he wanted to kiss smooth, and he started to ask it as Eddie grabbed to uncurl his grip from the bar at the side of the bed but Steve gave up fighting quick, focused on stopping Eddie from moving at all instead, from stretching the way he was against the precarious threads holding him together as he reached for the neck of his gown again, still loose enough from where he’d pulled the back up, left his ass out against the sheets to bare his breastbone, the mess of the tattoos on his chest more grisly after everything than any horrors he’d gotten inked before but—
This was a different kind of horrifying thing. Not least—maybe most—because it was entirely possible that it was also the most beautiful, sacred thing to ever touch Eddie’s skin. To ever beat through Eddie’s fucking veins.
“You,” Eddie let go of the last breath he could wrestle out before his lungs seized up too tight, because then he was watching it happen, watching Steve’s broad palm as it hovered over the imprint, shivering when Steve’s warmth made contact: eclipsing the bruise near-perfect, just like Eddie knew deep down it fucking would.
His heart took the hint and started shivering under Steve’s hand immediately, like it had something to prove.
“Ed,” Steve’s voice was wispy, choked a little; eyes too bright and Eddie feels like there must be so many kinds of dying, because he’d felt one keenly under that angry red lightning; this was a wholly other thing.
But felt just as keenly life-or-death.
“You,” Eddie whispered, the words, the truth, the feeling of it all too fragile, too precious to disturb, and he wondered if his heart knew Steve had pushed the bruises down around it to save it, if that’s why it was so unbridled and unabashed in hammering against that touch, that touch—
“I think I heard you.”
And Steve? Big eyes framed with those feather lashes, stretched wide and all made of shine and earnest fucking feeling?
“You didn’t…want to lose me?” Eddie’s voice had been so small, so so small because he did think he’d heard that, and the wisps of recollection, of a frantic but resolute voice demanding of him: what he was able to collect and try to tie into a whole matched up when he paired it all with Steve in his head, but what if he was wrong?
What if it was all just fever dreams and wishful thinking on his deathbed, what if Steve had no investment in him beyond keeping the Party safe in its entirety, no exceptions; what if Eddie was fucking wrong and showed too much of his hand with this, with Steve’s palm pressed to his thrashing heart and—
Then Steve was brining his free hand to Eddie’s cheek, fucking…cradling it like it fucking meant something, like he could matter and—
“I couldn’t lose you.”
Oh.
“You,” and so many possible ways to end that thought had swam through Eddie’s head—you barely know me, you can’t possibly care if I live or die, I cannot matter one fucking bit in your universe, so why would it matter but Steve’s hand was warm under his, and Steve didn’t pull away, only leaned in, only stayed close enough that Eddie could feel his breath on his skin and Steve could chart the way Eddie’s heart took to pummelling his already-taxed ribs but it didn’t matter, it couldn’t matter because Steve held there, so careful of the pain but nothing short of steady, devoted, a soul-sworn guard of that heart under his hand like it did matter, like Eddie did…
Like Steve ever could—
“Stevie,” Eddie would probably have flushed if the situation had been anything but what it was. If his heart wasn’t racing into Steve’s touch at the chest and just under the jaw where Steve’s thumb pressed almost proprietary, almost like a shield but also like a welcome, like the idea of Eddie’s heart beating into him wasn’t a dealbreaker, and fuck, fuck—
“I don’t know what I’m doing,” Steve breathed out against him, prickling dangerous across his skin and Eddie’s heart leapt a little, fuck; more than a little and Steve felt it, front-row-center, couldn’t not feel it but he just leaned closer still, and Eddie was front-row himself to the catch in Steve’s inhale, undeniable and unapologetic as he murmured low, turning into Eddie’s cheek a little and Eddie maybe resented how it forced him to pull away,until his lips brushed the tip of Eddie’s jawbone and drew a whole ass shudder down his goddamn spine.
“Just know,” Steve gasped there, fucking…panted and hell if it didn’t catch in Eddie’s blood like pure bliss; “just know why.”
And fuck, but Eddie could only press in to the warmth of Steve’s lips where they moved for the words alone, let alone what words; what Eddie thought maybe they meant—
“Me too,” Eddie rasped a little, because fuck him, man; this was something…something else, swelling up in his chest so strong and Steve had to be able to feel it where he still held against him, palm to his galloping pulse at the source, feeling the life he coaxed back into the world.
“Does it have to make sense just yet?” Eddie asked, knew he sounded too hopeful, too desperate, more than he’d earned, than was safe but his heart kept knocking against that hand, so fucking insistent and who was he to deny it, to try and wrestle in into being less when he couldn’t even hide it, when it was evident to the man it was leaping at; for.
“I don’t think so,” Steve mouthed more than spoke where his lips dragged wet across the stubble on Eddie’s cheek.
“Then,” Eddie tipped his head, tried to catch Steve’s eyes, aimed to reason, to convince but the moment he moved, Steve dipped his chin just so to take Eddie’s lips, to kiss so hard, so complete with what felt like it couldn’t even be reasoned as less than all of him, because how could less than all feel like this—
Fucking impossible.
And Eddie couldn’t shy away—as Steve kissed him breathless, left him gasping; Eddie couldn’t shy away from the sense that he was being killed and revived all over again, endless and unbreaking, and it was perfection.
Jesus fuck.
And the kicker was that…weeks passed. A whole month, close to another. And if anything changed it was all for the better, for the more and Eddie wasn’t entirely sure what to do with it, if he was entirely honest. He…the bruise healed, y’know? That brand above his heart but—
He didn’t need it anymore. That was the thing. He didn’t need to see.
He was very fucking aware. Every minute of every day. He was…so aware. It could kill him better than those bats, it was so big and so much, and so quick, but with all that, probably because of all that: Eddie’d never felt anything even remotely like what it meant to shake off sleep and have Steve Harrington kiss you to wakefulness, to hold you for the nightmares as much as the news of small victories on the road to recovery: never wavering.
Never leaving.
When Eddie got the go-ahead to continue his rehab outpatient-style, his original conviction that all of this ended at the latest upon discharge was immediately challenged, because Steve had become so much more than he’d started as, but Eddie still worried. Made himself sick over it.
Felt like an indefensible monster as Steve rubbed his back, brought him soup, tended him like Eddie didn’t cause his own suffering, and all for the terror of losing the very man who was there, without question.
Then he signed himself out, and Steve drove him home.
Save that Eddie recognized where they were headed and…he only knew one person in Loch Nora.
“Your uncle’s still in the motel by the plant,” Steve had explained what Eddie already knew but hadn’t put together when Eddie raised an eyebrow in askance, wholly unsure how to process any of this, any of this; unsure how to hope in the face of what he was seeing, held against what he was wishing.
“Government’s being fucking assholes about setting you up with someplace appropriate,” and something in Steve’s tone had made plain that he was not just very clear on what constituted ‘appropriate’, he was probably actively involved somehow in holding the people in question rightly accountable for appropriate, and nothing less.
And Eddie…he did say he didn’t need a mark you could see on his heart, didn’t he.
“You need the room while you get better,” Steve murmured as he killed the engine, and lifted Eddie’s hand to his lips, pressed his mouth on the knuckles, nuzzling a little, eyes closed and Eddie…Eddie didn’t know what to do.
The only saving grace was that he didn’t have a monitor to rat his ass out when his heart started trying to escape orbit—fuck just his ribs, how pedestrian—this time.
They sat in a living room that looked like it was once absolutely pristine and still was, mostly, but up close Eddie could see little snags on the sofa, could feel the texture of the fabric different under his fingers for scrubbing out a stain. He suspected four infamously unmannered teenagers were the culprits. The remaining stiffness of the cushions was good for the way his body was still working through being gnawed apart, but he was gone far enough to kind of immediately hope he’d see how they wore with love and use and maybe something more once they got there, once Eddie’s body cooperated again, because he…Steve brought him home.
And maybe they didn’t have to stop when Eddie left the hospital. Maybe he didn’t have to lose.
He’d only made it shortly past the best fucking grilled cheese he’d maybe ever tasted, and he didn’t think it was only because it was his first meal without an aftertaste of sterile in too fucking long—but he only lasted a little more than an hour before Steve’d helped him to a guest room on the first floor that’d obviously been reworked for him, from the way he could reach the bed from just inside the door, to the fucking posters that he knew for a fact Steve wouldn’t have had on hand, and Eddie’d giggled a little wetly at the Ozzy one, because he figured the man steadying him at his side would never be anything but intertwined with the Prince of Darkness in his mind, now—but Steve, who’d more than proven he was so far beyond any kind of king, won hands down. By a landslide.
And who could have seen that coming?
“Careful,” Steve chided him gently as he guided Eddie slowly down to the mattress and made to tuck him in, and the word was so warm, so warm but Eddie had to…
He had to reach. Again. He needed Steve, he…needed.
The handprint on top of his heart didn’t need to be a thing he could see, but he needed Steve to…know some level of what he was feeling, of how much was inside him already, and growing, the momentum building and he didn’t want to feed it, didn’t want to let it run if he wasn’t going to have someone to catch it, to run with him but he also didn’t think there was any chance to stop it, now, he didn’t think he could trim it back or tame it from consuming him and he wasn’t sure he’d even want to if he actually had the power because it was the best feeling he’d ever known, even if it was terrifying, even if it could hurt him more than anything he’d ever known and—
“I don’t want to be alone,” was what spilled from his lips with Steve’s hand above his heartbeat as it pumped so goddamn hard it couldn’t be denied, it couldn’t be misconstrued, and he didn’t want to sleep alone, didn’t want to lose what he’d rebuilt himself around all these weeks, he—
“Good,” and Steve leaned down, cradled Eddie’s face and tipped him up to kiss him full, hard, one hand still on his chest because that was the mark, the promise, the fight for all that this was and all it could be like a fucking vow and Eddie melted for it on sight, on contact.
“Because I’m not leaving,” and Steve brushed the tip of his nose back and forth against Eddie’s, his smile like honey in his tone as he pecked Eddie on the lips one more time before stretching his hand to follow him across the bed, to crawl to the other side and slide in next to Eddie, to carefully arrange him against Steve’s body, to wrap around him with so much care, to touch nothing too tender and everything safe to hold as Steve tucked his face against Eddie’s neck and kissed behind his ear as he breathed:
“Never gonna leave you all alone again.”
And Eddie believed him.
Eddie believed him.
And when, weeks later when Eddie was hurting less and moving more, perched in the corner of the couch that was starting to give a little under persistent weight, starting to feel like it was meant to be used and lend comfort; as Eddie was poking at campaign notes for the gremlins, pen caught between his teeth, he only paused when he felt the gravity of a familiar gaze settle on him—not immediately, because he liked just existing in it, feeling its heft, but after enough moments to satisfy him he looked up, met those eyes and felt them in his goddamn soul as he asked:
“What?”
And Steve had just kept on staring, the bare hint of a quirk at the corners of his lips spreading to the full sunrise of his smile.
“You fit, here,” and he’d said it so simply, so…much like a truth, a fact of the universe—Eddie Munson fits, belongs in this place, this space, this home, this life—and then the smile dimmed ever so slightly, cloud cover across the shine as Steve shifted a little, crossed his arms loose but still as a barrier over his chest: “if you want to, I mean—”
And Eddie sat up straighter, and he reached both his hands out to Steve because:
“I want to,” it was all he wanted, really; it wasso far beyond his wildest dreams but it was real, Eddie could see and touch it, taste it, feel it through his blood when it pumped, tracking through his whole body, filling up his heart overfull and magnificent and he as just…
“Sweetheart,” he took Steve’s hands and tugged him down to sit next to Eddie, settled him so close; “I’ve never wanted anything as much as I want that.”
He leaned back, wholly prone and never once letting go of Steve’s hands, never once doing anything but keeping them laced together and anchored, locked tight and Steve matched him, followed him as Eddie drew him to his healed-enough chest to settle right at the center, to hear Eddie’s heartbeat for the declaration it was, it already was in its entirety:
“You fit here.”
And he did. They both did. Their worlds had shifted, grew around the shapes they made together and after not-long-at-all, they fit so fucking well that it was bespoke to their cells, they’d never fit anyone else. It was quick and it was heady and it was fucking right.
For months
And then it all went to shit.
Because Steve decided what should have been expected, honestly—that Eddie wasn’t worth the hassle, that he wasn’t right for Steve, that Steve’s staggeringly-expansive capacity for love was wasted to hell on this low-life dipshit who couldn’t even graduate on his third try at high school, who maybe didn’t have a murder charge anymore in the legal system but would never wash it clean from the court of public opinion, who was…trouble. Always trouble.
Not fucking worth it.
It’s just…Eddie never thought Steve would stop wanting him. He maybe went in reticent at first, but Steve had loved so hard out the gate that as soon as he knew he was allowed, and welcome? Eddie didn’t hesitate to meet that love beat for beat.
He just never imagined his love would ever be unwelcome; that that's how his heart would break.
What breaks in the moment, though—the heartbreak is constant, and unfortunately proving to be kinda fucking unending, really—but what breaks now is…possibly the handle on the front door for the way someone’s banging and jiggling it back and forth like the first time it didn’t give against the lock was just a fluke.
He frowns, considers waiting out whoever’s enough of a dick to knock like that but apparently not so witch-hunty to throw a brick through the window—which: Eddie will take progress, he guesses—but when a concerning creak sounds from near the hinges, Eddie thinks of Wayne, and how his uncle doesn’t deserve a broken front door, so.
Heartbroken or not, Eddie has to drag himself to deal with…this.
Then he’s throwing the door open and…this is—
“We need to talk.”
This should have been expected. There’s really only one little asshole who’d assault his door with that much…determination.
“Henderson—” Eddie huffs, because he knows he needs to set a date for them all to get together, he left the campaign they were in kinda dangling on a thread when he didn’t hold the gatherings at St—
Well, when their regularly scheduled venue became too much for Eddie’s heart to handle.
Which: okay, fine, he gets it but like, he can’t care as much as he maybe should when he feels like this, and the kids need to fucking take a chill pill and if they can’t understand, then at least they can just shut the fuck up for at a couple more weeks while Eddie licks his wounds and sees if they decide to finally scab over enough that he doesn’t keep with busting them back open every time he breathes—
“About Steve.”
Eddie’s heart shudders just to hear the name. He’s avoided hearing it for weeks, now; it hurts too much.
He hears it enough in his own head, in his dreams, in his nightmares when he see the worst, in the cadence of his fucking pulse because his heart doesn’t know how not to be Steve’s, kinda feels like it’s not interested in learning, will never be anything other than what it is now, forever, and—
“We need to talk about what you did to Steve.”
Wait.
Wait, what he did to—
What?
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for @kultiras🖤
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tulipq · 1 day ago
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No one ever states the whole concept of the ship of Theseus. This shit is too fucking long winded. I hope you are all ready for this shit. At least I will use text you can copy paste around!
The full problem with the ship of Theseus is meant to be like a koan that gives you an insight into the unstable nature of identity. That's how I read it. I just wanted to state my current conclusion first, because you can't refute me if you don't know where I am going with this.
My answer is that neither is the original ship. The ship ceased to be itself in the original sense every moment and is actually "close enough to be felt the same by humans at the time" instead of being itself. Identity is unstable. A does not equal A because the notion of A is as a flickering flame in the eyes of its beholder.
Anyway, I am going to cheat in order to make things in a certain way. I will make it clear when this is cheating and not just clever storytelling.
We witness:
A boat maker, and he makes a boat. He also travels with the boat and he keeps replacing parts along the way because wooden boats are like this. He has a little barge or something that he stores all of the cast off part of the boat.
Suppose he is the last original crew member to die. He and his complete boat of boat parts get taken to the cemetery where all of the other original crew members.
Then Persephone notices she has the complete set of one of her favorite little adventuring groups that the muses sing about. She gives them all new lives and even magics the boat parts to be young and unworked material because fuck you this is a greek philosophy parable, I have decided to fuck with how time works. You can tell a version where that does not happen in your response.
Then the ship builder makes the ship parts into the original shape of the ship.
This is completed just as the current crew of the ship, the builder's body road to the graveyard in shows up to bury someone who was not part of the crew when it first departed.
Which ship is the original ship which the builder made? Is it the one with the builder, the crew, and the material that first left in the very same condition as when they left, or is it the one which has experienced all of the changes that happened since it first departed?
If the builder says he believes for sure the answer opposite yours, do you care about that? I do not.
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crescenthistory · 2 days ago
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hello there,
i’ve been a follower & a big admirer of your work for quite some time now — so i thought, perhaps i could leave a suggestion down here for when (if) you have the time and inspiration ?
here is what i had in mind,
female reader who is a freshly transferred student at hogwarts, and someone who happened to become very close to regulus. close enough for their mutual attraction to be clear and their relationship labeled as somewhat of a talking stage.
which is why it’s only natural when slytherin skittles, as regulus’ best mates, feel it is their mission to make sure reader is a decent person and someone who would not leave his heart broken. after all, it’s not an interrogation if they ‘just so happened to stumble over her in the common room’ while regulus is away. or maybe it is. still, they are looking out for him.
anyways, feel free to shape the scenario however you see fit or not write it all if it’s not what you’d be interested in. i hope your day is going great and i’m sending you all the love and hugs ! xoxo
hi there darling, thank you so much for your kind words and request<33 i went with the skittles hounding regulus prior to meeting up with reader, hope that's alright with you, mwah
Words: 1.3k
Warnings/tags: not proofread, fem!reader, slytherin skittles focus, banter, barty and dorcas bully regulus a little, you're not an active part in this but are talked about, regulus is in love and embarrassed over his friends, reader's background prior to hogwarts is not addressed, seer!pandora
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"Is it truly so hard to believe that someone other than you lot would dare be friends with me?"
The dorm erupted in various statements of "yeah, pretty much", "duh" and even Evan's "if what you have with her is a friendship, then I don't think we're friends, Reg."
Even on his worst days, Regulus was beyond grateful for the ragtag found family he had been swept into during his time in Slytherin. Barty who essentially picked him up one day and claimed him as his own, Evan with whom he found solace in the quiet, Dorcas who became the best verbal sparring partner he could ask for and Pandora who understood him better than he had ever thought possible – these were his people through and through.
Unfortunately, his people were kind of arseholes.
"It's taken us years to crack through your," – Barty, from where he was perched across Evan's lap, waved in Regulus' general direction with disdain – "stoicism, and you tell me this bird has you asking her out within a month? We have to believe that shit is some twisted dark magic."
"You would know all about twisted dark magic, wouldn't you, B?" Dorcas volleyed through a laugh, wiggling her eyebrows suggestively at him.
"Fuck off, Dorc, I thought you were with me on this!"
Evan playfully napped at Barty's ear when his passionate outburst turned its heat from Regulus to Dorcas.
“I can play for two teams." Dorcas seemed offended at Barty’s assumption of her loyalty, while Pandora sat beside her with an impervious smile, unaffected by the back and forth. “And don’t fucking call me that, Crouch.” 
Evan had to catch Barty’s foot by the ankle when he tried to launch it towards Dorcas in retaliation.
Regulus dropped his head into his hands with a groan. With Barty and Evan lounging on Barty's bed and Dorcas and Pandora on the floor in between, Regulus was left on the edge of his own bed, feeling awfully sorry for himself for having caring – if meddling – friends.
"Can you guys please be normal tonight?" he asked into his hands. Without looking up, he held a finger into the air to quell the argument about to fall off of Barty's tongue. "Don't. By normal I mean don't scare her off. Don't go asking weird or inappropriate or threatening questions, okay?"
"I simply cannot promise that." Both Dorcas and Evan gave Barty a wack to the leg and arm for his comment.
“I resent Barty at the moment, but yeah no, that’s going to be a tough ask, Reggie,” Dorcas amended.
Regulus eventually lifted his head to stare in near-defeat at his friends. "Listen. I... I like her, okay? Like proper, more than I thought I could. I want her to keep feeling comfortable around me, this is all still very... new to her."
He didn’t have to say that this was new to him, too. 
Pandora shifted in that way that alerted everyone to the fact she was about to speak – only when she spoke did Barty ever actually shut up. She smiled softly. "You're in love." She stated it plainly, a fact.
Regulus felt as if he had been punched in the gut by her assertion. "I– What?" he stumbled, gaze flashing quickly to spot the mirth and mischief on all of his friends' faces. With a steadying breath, he pressed his lips together and his palms to his knees. "That is way too soon to say, Dora. But I'd like to think I might eventually be. If you lot don't fuck it up for me." That last sentence was directed towards the bed opposite his with a light glare.
Barty threw his head back with a gleeful, almost screeching laughter and fully ignoring most of what Regulus had said. "This is going to be so fun!"
"We're not going to fuck it up," Dorcas translated Barty's sentence, with the dignity to wear a somewhat rueful smile. "Though, I will say, if she cannot handle these dynamics of ours, I question how she will be able to sustain a relationship with you."
That exact fear had been brewing in Regulus' stomach all day, ever since you agreed this morning to join him with his friends to Hogsmeade tonight after spending almost every day together in the library for the past month. Being with you was the highlight of his days, a quiet sort of ease settled into his bones, and he ached to extend it past dinnertime. What you had was special to him, something he feared to lose, though he did not dare voice it. He had no idea how to answer Dorcas' musings, but thankfully he didn't have to.
"Oh, she will," Pandora assured, breezily, as if this was a cosmic law.
"You’s seen her?" Evan questioned, looking at his sister with a gaze only she could decipher. She made a so-and-so head movement, which seemed to be a perfectly understandable answer to Evan.
Regulus supposed it was to him, too.
"Really, Reg, we're not going to scare her off or traumatise her or whatever else you're accusing us of here," Barty grumbled, as if relenting. He crawled out of Evan's lap to come hustle Regulus out of his perfectly comfortable seated position, slapping the sides of his arms when he stood. "We might interrogate her a little bit – but, hey, that's just to know that she deserves our little prince! And we'll be totally nice and polite or whatever."
"Reassuring, Barty." Regulus gave him an unimpressed glare, but the corners of his lips tugged at his best friend's familiar tactics.
"Great, 'cause that's not my strong suit you know!" Barty called out as he whipped around, grabbing his coat and bag in a flurry. “Pulling out the big guns just for you, Reggie.”
"Never thought I'd hear him admit that," Dorcas mumbled to herself, drawing a giggle from Pandora.
The rest of the group seemed to get the signal that it was about time to move outside, having been chattering away for the past half an hour after Regulus insisted on them getting ready early, lest they be late. "Finally heading out?" Evan questioned gleefully, not one to want to wait for long.
"Yeah. Just, again, please. Be cool." Regulus stressed it one final time, regarding them all sternly.
Barty gasped. "He said please!"
"Then we simply have to," Dorcas agreed.
With a roaring laughter, they opened the door and filtered out as if they were one large entity. Regulus supposed in some ways they were, which made him feel terribly sorry for you and what he was about to put you through.
And he knew he was a selfish man when he thought it next, but his blood warmed nonetheless as he hoped you liked him just as much as he did you – which would mean enough to withstand his friends' undoubtedly incoming interrogation.
Lucky for him, by the entrance of the Great Hall, where you had agreed to meet, you were standing in your favourite outfit and wringing your hands, eager to not just withstand but dance in that very storm.
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kaminocasey · 3 days ago
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Hey! I'm gonna take advantage of your charity and incredible talent and ask me some Silco stuff, and I will make it very personal.
Im just a sucker for angsty fluff, so I was thinking something in the lines of reader works either in some restaurant where Silco goes or actually works in the last drop. And she's just having a rough couple of days and Silco finds out about it and just wants to help (maybe he gets frustrated because of it all, and goes all Silco, you know what I mean? Damn I'm gonna shut up now). But we all know Silco is not the most affectionate man, or at least shows it in weird (?) ways. I feel like it would be better (?) if they didn't have a relationship yet. But I'll leave it to your brilliance to do as you please, I have complete trust in your skills.
But remember, you don't have to do this if you don't feel like it of course.
Anyway, to much information already. So good luck, love your work, that brain of yours and you in general ❤️💙💛🤍
PS- do not allow me to make more requests, I will make them long, weird and I'll keep remembering more stuff to add and the next thing you know it's a full blown fic 🤣
Take All Your Sins
A/N: Thank you so much for your request, love!!! I was excited to do this one!!! This is going to be a two parter or MORE for SURE. <3 ilysm thank you again for your trust in me!!!
Summary: You work in the Last Drop and very close to Vander. What happens if Silco comes along and ruins that?
Pairing: Silco x Reader
WC: 1.4k
Warnings: Angst, sweet Silco, protective Vander, alcohol
Taglist Form | Arcane Masterlist
“If you have something else to do, I can finish those.” You come into the doorway of the kitchen, nodding toward the dishes that he’s doing. 
“I got ‘em. Almost done.” The older man smiles at you.
A few years ago, Vander gave you a place to stay when he found you out on the streets and ever since then, you were basically inseparable. His kids were like your own. 
“Rough night, huh?” Vander asks as you lean in the doorway, keeping an eye on the place in case more patrons came in. 
The Last Drop is usually busy this time of night, especially on this day of the week. But it’s like a ghost town right now and you can’t seem to figure out why.
“Rough week.” You sigh, crossing your arms. 
“Do you need a couple days off?” Vander asks, genuinely.
He always made sure you were taken care of, which you appreciate, but sometimes it feels like he does too much for others, and never lets anyone do anything for him. You’re bound to change that though. His birthday is coming up and you’ve been saving up for something special that will be from you and the kids. 
“Nah, I’m-” You start but hear the door open.
“You got it?” Vander asks and you nod with a grin and turn around to greet the customer, letting the kitchen door swing shut.
“What can I get ya?” You smile at the older man, who makes you do a subtle double take.
“Whiskey. Neat, please.” He smiles. 
He’s got dark hair, a partially scarred face, one blue eye and the other dark black with an orange iris that makes him look incredibly menacing. He’s wearing an open, fancy peacoat with a buttoned vest and tie. Who the hell is this guy?
His eyes rake over you as you approach the bar where he sits. 
“Haven’t seen you before.” You smile, politely. 
“I don’t get out much.” He takes his coat off and sits it down on the stool next to him. “I… work a lot.” 
His voice is silky and you can’t help but want to hear him say more. 
“What do you do?” You ask as you pour his drink. 
“I own my own business.” He tells you and takes the drink when you slide it to him. 
The way he says it, makes you think he doesn’t want to answer anymore questions about himself. 
“What’s your name?” He asks softly. 
You tell him and he takes a sip, keeping his blue eye on you. You smile softly, unsure of what to say.
“Pretty name.” He tells you, after he finishes off his drink. 
You go to pour him another but he puts his hand over his drink and shakes his head.
“Thanks.” You put the bottle back down and then take the empty glass from him, sitting it in the sink. “What’s yours?” 
“Silco. Do you like working here?” He asks, not missing a beat. 
You nod. “Yeah, I do.” 
“And you like Vander?” 
You nod. “Who doesn’t?” 
He chuckles, glancing around subtly. “Who doesn’t, indeed?”
“What are you doing after work?” He asks. 
Oh… of course. He thinks you’re going to put out- 
“I’m not trying to fuck you.” He tells you, as if he can read your mind while he stands up and puts his coat back on.
“You’re not?” You narrow your eyes at him.
“I mean, I wouldn’t say no if you wanted to, but that’s not why I asked.” He smirks.
You both stare at each other for a moment. His eyes fall to your lips before coming back up to your eyes.
“So… the real reason is?” You cross your arms.
“I think you’re beautiful and I’ve not been on a proper date in years.” Silco shrugs, placing a hand on the back of the barstool. 
You go warm in the face before looking down at his slender fingers and immediately can’t help but wonder what they’d feel like inside-
“I’ll be by at 11.” He tells you, snapping your thoughts back to the present as he places a few cogs onto the bar. 
“Um. Alright.” You nod, giving a kind smile. 
He stares at you for another short moment before giving you a smile back and then leaving. Just as the door closes, Vander walks out and sees you staring at the door, breaking you out of the trance that Silco seemed to have put you in.
“Everything okay?” He asks, placing a hand on your shoulder.
You look up at him, smiling a little dreamily. It’s not something you’re used to. Normally, when customers ask you out, you brush them off and pay them no mind. But Silco… he managed to get you to pay attention. 
“All good. Um… I have a date after work.” You go warm in the face at the word ‘date’. 
It’s not like you don’t date… you do… just not consistently. The last date you went on was a year ago. It didn’t go well so you decided to just focus on work.
“With the customer that just came in? Who is he?” Vander’s eyebrows raise in surprise, knowing that you haven’t gone out with someone in a long time.
“Just… some guy.” You shrug, starting to wipe down the bar. 
Vander chuckles. “Alright. Keep your secrets. I was young once, too.”
You laugh with him, your thoughts immediately going back to Silco’s unmatching eyes and the way they softened at the sight of you. 
“You can go get ready if you want. I can finish here.” Vander smirks. 
You roll your eyes. “Thanks. I owe you.” 
“Nah. Get outta here.” He nods toward the door that leads to the upstairs. 
You pat him on the shoulder as you walk past him, heading upstairs to go shower. You look at the clock and see that it reads 9:30. That should give you plenty of time to get ready. You don’t take particularly long showers. 
As you turn on the water, you climb into the shower, letting the water flow over your body as you stand there for a moment before starting to wash your body and hair. You still can’t stop thinking about the older man. He had to be about Vander’s age, right? You wonder if they know each other. Perhaps after you get to know Silco a little more, you’ll introduce them. 
After your shower, you dry your hair the best you can and then settle on a dress that you’d saved up forever to buy just because. What better excuse to wear it than on a date with an extremely attractive, slightly intimidating, man? 
At ten til 11, you make your way back down to the bar. Vander and Benzo both let out a whistle at the sight of you.
“Don’t you clean up nice?” Vander grins. 
You shrug, going warm in the face from the attention. “I guess.” 
You sit up on the bar stool next to Benzo. You glance over at the door and then back at Vander. 
“Do you want something to loosen your nerves?” Vander teases. 
“I’m alright, thanks.” You roll your eyes, amused.
“Who’s this hot date with?” Benzo nudges you with his elbow. 
You go warm in the face all over again, thinking about Silco. “Just some older guy… he’ll be here any minute.” 
They accept that answer and continue their conversation from before about business stuff that you don’t really mind yourself with. You pretty much just show up and do your job and do exactly what Vander tells you to do and then go back upstairs and sleep. And then repeat. 
The door opens moments later, and the three of you look up to find Silco walking in. You can’t help but give him a sweet smile. He smirks at you and pauses by the door.
“Are you ready-” He starts.
“Silco.” Vander growls. 
“Hello, Vander.” Silco’s eyes fall past you to the man behind you. “Lovely establishment you have here.”
You turn to Vander, confused. “You know each other?”
“Oh yes, we do.” Silco walks toward you, wrapping an arm around your lower back, looking you up and down. “You look beautiful, darling.” 
“She’s not going anywhere with you.” Vander comes around the bar and starts toward Silco but Benzo gets up quickly from the stool and stops him. 
You look between Silco and Vander, still confused.
“I think that’s for her to decide.” Silco smirks up at Vander who stands almost a foot above him.
You turn to Vander, with furrowed brows. This man is the one who gave you life again, the man who is like a father to you. The man you owe your life to. If he says you shouldn’t go… then shouldn’t you listen to him?
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starburstminibot · 1 day ago
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Ok, seeing the post about the playlist, you mentioned how Breakdown only gets his act together after finding out that Bee was carrying
So it got me thinking (and this has actually been in my mind since i first came across the au tbh), but how was it while Bee was like, carrying?? There's the fact that, at first, many of the bots probably don't like Breakdown too since, well, he was not the best bf let's be honest.
Idk, I'm just curious to how things were before Breakcheck came to see the world
(Im going out of town for a week and cant draw so im just answering this with a straight up fanfiction-esk paragraph I’m so sorry wish I could be artistic for you anon)
Long story short: the Autobots are very forgiving but they can also be petty motherfuckers.
I mean they welcomed Megatron among their ranks and treat him (for the most part) as an equal and sometimes even a friend. Of course, Megatron earned that trust after years and years of repentance.
I imagine Breakdown is going through a similar arc. He’s never really been THAT loyal to the Decepticon cause. He just… kinda ended up there and didn’t care enough to do anything about it. He views Autobots as these goody, righteous people that he doesn’t feel like he belongs with. So really… what’s left besides Decepticons (considering yourself a neutral at one point was pretty much a death wish. A faction was the only way to acquire any sort of Energon or medical attention. Something Optimus tried hard to avoid, but the reality was safety in numbers.) the only kinship Breakdown ever felt was with the Stunticons… and they’ve been scattered to who knows where… if they’re even still alive.
Except he did have one friend. A friend he’s somehow managed to keep despite being on opposite sides of the war. He tried to convince Bee to join the Decepticons a few times but it was never with genuine intent. Bee was too good for the Cons; Breakdown knew that. He asked to get a rile out of him more than anything. Of course Bee would retort with his own argument of why BD should defect. He was serious about it… but Breakdown knew his place. He’d already done too much…
Now the war is over. And the leader of his faction doesn’t even believe in the cause anymore. Now, Breakdown’s never been a fan of Megatron anyways, but he sure as hell is pissed off when he abandons them to go be buddies with the Autobots. Maybe Breakdown is a little jealous (Of course, he’d never admit it) That Megatron, possibly the cruelest and most unforgiving of them all, is allowed to be redeemed.
He feels betrayed. All the Decepticons do really… He feels like he was led down a path that would only end in self destruction and at the last moment, the one who was paving the way jumped ship, leaving them all to suffer the consequences alone.
He never even wanted this.
But it’s way too late now. He dug this grave and he’s going to see to it that he’s buried in it. But despite the betrayal, and most of the Decepticons now stabbing each other in the back, trying to claim whatever power they can while holding on to this flimsy cause they can barely call a functioning faction, he still has Bee… who is maybe more than just a friend at this point but that’s a lot of feelings Breakdown isn’t ready to unpack.
And he still runs every time it feels a little too good to be true. Still proclaims his loyalty to the Decepticons because he’s too stubborn to admit he’s on a sinking ship. And he still keeps his distance because he refuses to take Bumblebee down with him when it finally goes under.
And maybe they’ve got a fling going… and maybe the autobots start to catch on. It doesn’t matter though, Breakdown doesn’t stick around long enough to see their sneers.
Until… he finds out Bee’s carrying that is… because damn he may not be the best bot in the galaxy but he’s not a complete deadbeat.
And when it hits him… that he’s going to be a sire… well maybe… he start’s sticking around to see the sneers. He hears the mumbles of disapproval. And boyyy does it make him so angry at first. How dare these holier-than-thou bots. They don’t know him or what he’s had to do to survive. How many comrades he’s lost thanks to them. They don’t know what Bee means to him. They don’t know just how much he loves Bumblebee. How he would lay down his spark for him in a klick.
Then Breakdown questions… Does Bee even know that?
From then on… Breakdown realizes, preserving his ego isn’t worth this. He has a chance now. A real honest chance. To do better… to have the life he actually wants… with the one bot who hasn’t ever given up on him.
He wants it so bad.
So he puts up with the comments and the obvious distrust. Because he’s willing to put in the work it takes to earn it. He’s going to prove how much he wants this. He’s going to prove how much he cares. He’s going to prove he is capable of doing better… and maybe along the way he’ll learn… he’s deserving of better too…
Breakdown is lucky Bumblebee has always been a little spoiled because it didn’t take too much convincing for the autobots to give him a shot. To attempt to accept him into their ranks.
He thought Optimus would be the worst of it. The one who practically raised the bot Breakdown knocked up. And for a while it is. Optimus lectures him every chance he gets. Any small hiccup, any little mistake. He doesn’t go easy on breakdown. Optimus at least pretends to be polite about it, or at least professional.He doesn’t yell, or make unnecessary insults. His words are always very honest (which makes them that much harder to hear) but Breakdown will take it… he’ll sit through it, no matter how hard he has to bite his tongue against saying something he’ll regret. He knows how thin the ice is. But he’ll do it for Bee.
The others are a little more brutal… Elita especially so… they are more sharp with their words (and sometimes their blasters) letting him know just what they think of him.
But no… the worst of all… is Megatron. Because Megatron is probably the only bot in the whole faction who looks at him and empathizes. Breakdown doesn’t want empathy. Especially not from the damn bot who betrayed him. Megatron doesn’t give lectures, he doesn’t verbally or physically abuse him when he steps out of line. He barely even raises his voice. And it pisses Breakdown off more than anything. Sometimes he slips up in front of Megatron just to push his boundaries, just to see if he can break this peaceful facade the ex-brutal-dictator seems to be taking. He’s witnessed the warlord beat bots into scrap for far less… and yet… Megatron won’t. Megatron seems to be attempting to guide Breakdown, to offer a new start to their relationship, and Primus Breakdown wants nothing to do with it. He’d rather be lectured and assigned extra training.
And it takes a long while… longer than Bee’s carrying term, and a little while into Breakcheck’s sparklinghood for the Autobots to really start to come around to him. Optimus’ lectures seem to have a bit of fondness to them. And perhaps Breakdown listens a bit more earnestly and takes to heart some of the genuine advice the Prime gives him. And maybe the sparring with Elita has turned less from a one-sided fight and into an enjoyable workout. And MAYBE… he doesn’t intentionally push Megatron as much, and has come to a realization of his own that his Megatron… is nothing like the one who betrayed him… and perhaps there is more in common between them than he’d like to admit.
And when people look at him now, he’s not just the Con Bumblebee has been sneaking around with. He’s a Sire… and a devoted Conjux…
And maybe this is what he’s always wanted. And he can be deserving of it too.
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thesummerstorms · 1 day ago
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You know that conversation you can have with Emmrich where he asks what your plans are for your body when you die?
I think Arsinoë accidentally horrified him. Not by clinging to non-Nevarran ideals about cremation, but by telling him she never thought anyone would care that much one way or the other.
She would be dead, so she wouldn't care. And honestly, a majority of compradi die as Fledglings without graduating; she thinks their bodies were probably burned (since you have to do something with bodies) but they certainly don't have funerals, so it certainly wasn't worth worrying about then.
Emmrich interjects, trying to wrangle his own shock long enough to point out that she's not a Fledgling now, so surely...?
Well if she dies now, Arsinoë all but shrugs, it would depend on the circumstances, wouldn't it? She isn't someone important like a Talon or the scion of an established Crow family. She certainly isn't Caterina Dellamorte, who warrants something verging on a State Funeral.
If she died, there is still a non-zero chance it would be at another Crow's hands, in which case it's anyone's guess what happens after.
If she dies honorably fulfilling a contract, then Viago might feel obligated to do something if he isn't pissed off at her failure and she's isn't still in Exile. He's her mentor, so probably he would manage at least a small pyre. Maybe even a flower or two for the flames if he's letting himself feel sentimental. Teia would probably be there because Viago was.
But just as often, when a contract goes wrong, there's no time to go back for the body. The mark get ahold of it, or whoever's left on the contract has to focus on survival rather than the dignity of a corpse that can't feel any of it.
But really, none of that would matter to Arsinoë, would it? She'd be off wherever dead souls end up going, or maybe in oblivion, who knows. She doesn't have any family to be horrified by her corpse unless you count Viago, who is Fifth Talon, has bigger things to worry about, and will get over it.
But anyway, why do you ask, Emmrich?
Emmrich is too aghast to answer clearly at that point because every single point of Arsinoë's answer goes so deeply against everything that is ingrained in him as part of the Mourn Watch, from the belief that a corpse just doesn't matter to her sincere belief that no one would care enough about her for any particular mourning rights.
And the thing is Emmrich does care. It's his professional duty to care, but he's also become fond of his young friend and he cannot handle imagining that she could die on this mission or the next and potentially receive no rites at all.
Cue Emmrich starting to plan how he's going to have Rook interred in the Grand Necropolis when the time comes. It may involve some string pulling, especially if (hopefully) she dies not on this mission but in the distant future, and even more so if he precedes her and has to leave the job in one of his colleague's hands. But Maker help him, there will be a plan and her death will be respected.
When it comes to light, Neve is uncertain and a little weirded out, but also a little offended by all this. She's fallen in love with Rook, but even before that, the respect between them would have warranted a pyre and Arsinoë's name on the Wall of Light if there was no one else to arrange things. Is this why she's never asked about what happened after Varric-
Lucanis is horrified by the idea of Arsinoë as one of the spirit-possessed skeletons in the Necropolis or one of the jewel-eyed skulls in its many niches; he snaps at Emmrich about Nevarran obsession and respecting Rook as Antivan.
Emmrich refuses to budge. She expected the Crows to do nothing for her. She deserves better, deserves to be remembered, even if she isn't Nevarran.
Lucanis seems fully stunned by the idea that Rook believed this in the first place, given Viago's attachment. Given Lucanis's own growing feelings. Emmrich does soften a little bit when he sees that Lucanis truly didn't realize, but he also doesn't fully divert his plans.
Gathering a grave-dowry is normally left to a lover or family member if the deceased was themselves unable, and Emmrich is neither. But needs must, and though his friend now seems attached to Neve and Lucanis, hearts can be fickle. A plan is better. So he puts away small things here or there, eyes which of Rook's enchanted rings and amulets she seems to favor just in case.
It almost helps him live with the knowledge that Arsinoë believed she would die unmourned. Almost.
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angelpuns · 3 days ago
Text
50AU Part 34/Finale
Donnie would like to say that the worst 10 minutes of his life was when he had to watch as Leo sacrifice himself with no way to stop him. 
He would like to say that. 
But now that he'd seen Leo's memory of that moment, watching his twin throw himself into another dimension was taking second to this moment. 
The moment in which he described what had happened during the curse to Leo. 
Because he could have lied. He wasn't good at it, but he could have at least tried to lie. It would keep Leo from worrying about the things he had done during the curse, and it would keep Donnie from having to tell him about what happened during the memory spell. 
Except, Leo looked so tired. And Donnie was sick of lying to him. 
And he was fairly certain Leo would find a way to learn the truth on his own, anyway, whether Donnie wanted him to or not. 
He slowly went through the events of the curse. How well the first day had gone, how Leo had ran the second one. How he'd been injured and just kept running,  and how they had been so sure they got through to him. Only for Leo to have been acting. 
It felt like so much when he was saying it aloud, but it…it really had only been a week. 
And barely even that. But so much had happened that it felt like forever. 
Leo's face fell as Donnie kept going, as he described what had happened day by day.
As he suspected, Leo had found out about their fight on his own. Leo hadn't said anything until Donnie brought up the fight, so it was a little surprising when he interrupted. 
“ And then I-” 
“ Did it hurt?” Leo asked, voice small. He had shrunken in the booth, shoulders hunched and eyes staring down at the table, “ When I…when I attacked you?” .
Donnie blinked. He lightly touched his beak, which was thankfully no longer tender. It had hurt a lot, but Leo already looked so guilty. 
“ No, it didn't hurt-”
“ why are you lying?” He hissed, glancing up to make eye contact with Donnie, “ don't lie, Dee, I- I would be fucking scared of me, too”
Scared? 
Leo thought they were scared? Of him? 
It was almost laughable, really, but Donnie had enough self control to keep himself serious. 
“...is that what this is about? You think we're scared of you?” He asked, unable to keep the humor out of his voice. Nothing about the situation was funny, but for Leo to think they were scared of him was- well, it was downright hilarious. 
Leo didn't seem to agree, though, looking away guiltily. 
“ Lee, c'mon, as if any of us could be scared,” He tried, “ It was pretty wild to see you so…violent, don't get me wrong, but-”
“ But I hurt you! And-and apparently I hurt Mikey and Raph, too!” Leo retorted, suddenly sitting up again, “ I mean- I-I could have seriously injured one of you or even-”
He snapped his mouth shut and shook his head, like he didn't really want to say it. 
Donnie sighed, “ Look, ‘Nardo, that wasn't really you, I mean, you were cursed-”
“ You don't get it! That- That was still me!” Leo hissed, throwing his hands up in the air, “I am angry! And violent! And- and terrible!”
“Leo, we're not scared of you, even if you are like that, it-it doesn't matter, we know you didn't mean to!” Donnie protested. 
He wasn't really sure where all this had come from. Leo claiming to be angry and violent. Sure, Donnie had seen Leo get mad before. And he could really get mad. But it wasn't like he couldn't control it. 
Donnie remembered when they were kids and Leo would get so mad he'd just cry. He'd be so upset that it wouldn’t have anywhere to go, and he'd just burst into tears and run away. 
Once, Donnie had followed him to try and apologize, only to walk in on Leo throwing his things off his bed and screaming into a pillow. So Donnie of all people knew his twin could get mad. 
“Raph gets mad all the time, and we're not scared of him, right?” Donnie tried, “ you're not scared of Raph, are you?”
“‘Course not…” Leo murmured. He rested his forehead on the table. 
 “ ….Even though Raph tried to…to kill you? During the invasion…?” 
They both looked up at the voice, Donnie blinking in surprise. Raph and Mikey had shown up almost out of nowhere. Right. Donnie forgot to leave a note. 
“ Raph….I'd never be scared of you,” Leo sighed, “ that's- it's different- ” 
“ Its not. Leo, we get that you were still yourself during the curse,” Mikey said matter of factly, “ But the point is that you didn't know it was us. If you had actually believed us, would you have done any of those things?” 
Leo scoffed, “ of course I wouldn't!” 
“ Okay, then, it's settled. We're not scared of you, and we have no reason to be. Got it?” 
Leo frowned, but nodded a bit. 
He looked up at Donnie. 
A small part of him was hoping Leo would be satisfied and not ask to hear more, especially not the whole ‘ went into his memory and accidentally saw some shit’, but he knee his dum-dum twin wouldn't be satisfied. He wouldn't have been either, if he were in Leo's shoes. 
“ Donnie, what happened after that?” 
Donnie took a deep breath, “ Let's- before we get into that let's go home…” 
Leo glanced around, seemingly just noticing that they were the only ones left in the restaurant, save for Hueso and Leo's….boyfriend watching from the kitchen. 
“Shit, I forgot about- uh, lemme apologize to Hueso and uh- “ His cheeks flushed as he gestured to the waiter, Donnie unable to hold back a snort. It was a little funny that Leo thought they didn't know. About him being gay, that is. He’d actually hid his boyfriend pretty well, even from Donnie. 
They watched as Leo hurried over to Hueso and apologized, the skeleton waving it off like he had last time. Donnie planned on giving him a full kitchen remodel to make up for all the damage they kept doing to his restaurant.  
Then, Leo turned to the waiter and pulled him into a tight, squeezing hug. He glanced back at his brothers with red cheeks before giving the waiter a peck on the cheek and hurrying back to their side. 
“ Ohohoooo, Looks like Leo's got some explaining to doo~” Mikey teased,  “ Dude, Raph is gonna hunt that waiter down and give him the shovel talk!” 
“ Raph is not!” Raph retorted, glancing at Leo, “ unless he ain't treatin’ you right already. then Raph'll have to talk to him,” 
“ Oh my god can we please just go?” Leo whined, already cutting open a portal, “ I didn't plan on having so many emotional talks tonight and I just wanna get this one over with,” 
Raph and Mikey stepped into the portal, Donnie starting after them. 
He was…scared. Scared that once Leo found what he did, he'd never forgive them. Never forgive Donnie. 
It made him shudder with anxiety, wringing his hands as Leo followed him through the portal. They emerged in the living room, Mikey and Raph already taking up two of the beanbags. 
Leo closed the portal and slumped into Dad's chair.  Donnie swallowed down the nausea at the sight. 
“ Okay, chop chop Dee, I want to get all the emotional talking out so then you all can tease me about Yuichi and all that and we can all go back to normal, ‘kay?” Leo sighed, looking far too comfortable in the chair that they'd trapped him in. Twice. 
“ Well..well, after that, Draxum finished the potion and…” Donnie started, starring to pace. His fingers ached with how hard he kept squeezing him, but it was the only thing keeping him from just running away.  He hated this he hated this he hated this! 
He hated that he didn't know how Leo would react. Obviously he didn't give a shit if Leo decided to fight him again. That would make sense, at least. 
But it would hurt more knowing that Leo was well within his rights to just…dedide he didn't want to interact with Donnie ever again. That he wasn't to be trusted. That Donnie could never be trusted with anything again now that he'd done this. 
Leo could be understanding, sure. But he was the king of holding grudges. Rest assured that if this upset Leo, Donnie would be living in the aftermath of it for..probably forever. 
But he could not keep lying about stuff to his already confused twin, he couldn't keep breaking promises. 
He described the whole memory spell, that Draxum had modified it so they could stay there longer, that they first had cleansed the memory of him falling off the roof. 
“ and then we were….it was your memory of the invasion, back when…when you decided to…” Donnie swallowed back his anxiety. He was pacing back and forth. He'd been doing so as he spoke, afraid that if he sat down he wouldn't be able to say it. He couldn't stop to watch Leo's expression, to try and puzzle out his reaction to what Donnie said. He had to keep moving or he'd never be able to say it. 
“ But- something happened. We were too far, the item was your sword, and- and you were about to portal into the prison dimension,” Donnie sighed, rubbing at his arms thoughtlessly. He finally stopped and looked at his twin. 
His expression was like something out of a drama. Wide-eyed realization set in. Leo blinked, staring at him incredulously. 
He smiled faintly, a lopsided, shaky thing that was nothing like Leo's usual smirk or even his more rare, soft smile. This one didn't fit his face right, didn't curve in the right way, it hardly looked real. 
“ You…didn’t. You wouldn't…” he chuckled, standing up off the couch and stepping up to Donnie. He put his hands on Donnie's shoulders, grip not overly tight, but definitely noticeable. Like he was purposefully holding back, “ Donnie, please tell me you didn’t,”
Donnie sighed shakily, “ I didn't have a choice,” 
Leo’s strange, crooked smile cracked into a shaky frown, his expression changing a thousand miles a minute. It didn't take the years of practice Donnie had had trying to interpret his expressions to know that Leo was angry. He pushed away from Donnie - the softshell only stumbling a little. It wasn't nearly as hard as Leo could have pushed him. 
His hands shook with the effort it must have taken to hold back. The mask of control sliding down before Donnie had the opportunity to see Leo get angry again. Not that he wanted to, but it wasn't as if it would be a strange occurrence now. Not after the curse, anyway. 
“ You- you promised,” Leo bit out, taking a few steps back. His eyes were glassy, like he might cry. It had been years since Donnie had seen Leo cry out of frustration like that. He was sure it had happened, but never in the view of anyone else.
“ you promised you wouldn't- you wouldn’t ask about that anymore, but you just had to know, didn't you, ‘Tello?” He bit out, voice shaking with barely contained anger, “ You just- you just had to see it, huh? Co-couldn't even wait to ask again?” 
“ It- it wasn't on purpose! I had to get the sword, and you were already teleporting, and I couldn't- I couldn't get out!” Donnie retorted, knowing he must have sounded desperate. But he needed Leo to understand it was an accident, “ I tried not to look, I-I promise, but you made me!” 
“I made you?” Leo scoffed, tears rolling down his cheeks. He was laughing, throwing his arms up in the air at what must have felt like a cruel joke, “ oh I'm sure! I'm sure I made you follow me in, made you watch as I- as he-” 
He shut himself up, snapping his mouth closed and shaking his head. 
“ I never wanted you to see that,” He bit out, “ I would never want anyone to see that”
“ I didn't mean you as in- as in you- you,” Donnie sighed. He felt so defeated. He was so tired still, even if things were fine again. Because they didn't feel fine. Leo was mad at him. Mad at him. And rightfully so, but…it still hurt. 
Sure, Donnie had been avoiding him lately. He just…he hadn't wanted to tell Leo what happened. He thought maybe if they didn't talk, Donnie wouldn't have the opportunity to tell Leo what he'd done. And eventually they'd all forget and move on. 
“ your…the inner Leo made me watch. I promise, I tried to-”
“Oh so now you're saying that-that I must have subconsciously wanted you to see it!? I bet you told Mikey and Raph everything, didn't you!?” Leo chuckled, eyes unfocused. He was hardly even looking at Donnie anymore, pacing back and forth in a way that mirrored what Donnie had been doing before, though it was far more erratic, “ I bet everyone knows now how - how broken I am and how scared I was and-”
“I’m not saying- I-I didn't tell them!” Donnie cut him off, grabbing Leo's arm to stop him, “ Leo, I didn't want to- I didn't mean to see it, I promise! I’m sorry, it-it was a mistake!” 
Leo wrenched his arm away with a scowl, eyes still unfocused. Like he wasn't really listening. “ you promise, huh?” 
It was silent for a moment, Donnie unsure what to say that hadn't already been said. 
“I need..I need to go..” He murmured, turning away, “ Please, don't…don’t try and- I just need to be alone…’ 
He still had his sword on him from his impromptu pizza trip, and he quickly cut a portal and stepped through it. Donnie just stood there. 
He didn't know what to do anymore. How to fix it. He'd finally managed to fix the curse but how was he supposed to fix what he'd done? It had been an accident, but still. 
He glanced back to Mikey and Raph, who were watching the entire thing with concern. 
“ You guys…i think-  I think I really messed up..” 
Donnie didn't tell them what he'd seen. He didn't dare fuck that up again. But he did tell Raph and Mikey about the promise he made with Leo, about how he had purposefully kept the truth from his twin the entire week. And about how Leo had found his security tapes from before. 
He almost wanted to delete them, to get rid of any evidence that Leo had been…. But he didn't touch them. If Leo wanted to know the truth, he should be able to see it for himself. 
“He’s never gonna forgive me…” Donnie murmured, now cradling a cup of tea. Mikey was making breakfast, even if it was a little too early. He'd urged them all to eat something, even if Donnie was especially not hungry. 
It had barely been an hour, not even that, but it felt like Leo was going to be mad at him forever. And he couldn't fix it. He didn't know how anymore. He didn't know Leo anymore. 
It all just kept circling back to the same thing. If he had done better. If he had paid more attention to the changes Leo was going through. If he had been able to keep Leo from hurting him or if he had been faster or if- 
He didn't know. It was done, now, but he wished he could just go back and-and maybe even take the hit. It was his fault they were fighting in witchtown in the first place. At least if he had forgotten his family, it wouldn't have been- well, wouldn't it have? 
Leo was better at reading people, though. And a much better strategist. He could have kept Donnie from doing anything too permanent, kept him from running off. 
Ugh, this was getting them nowhere! Wishing things were different just made everything feel worse. He needed to find a way to fix it, not dwell on it further. 
“ D'you think Leo hates me?” He asked, not realizing he'd said aloud until Raph reached over and put a hand on his shoulder. 
“ Nah, he doesn't hate you,”  Raph rumbled, squeezing Donnie's shoulder a bit, “he’ll figure out it wasn't your fault soon enough,” 
Donnie nodded, though the thought didn't comfort him. It was his fault, after all. He'd thought he could get the sword. Not to mention Leo was so stubborn, he was probably never going to forgive Donnie. 
“ Yeah, maybe..” Was all he said, knowing full well that Leo probably did hate him and would never forgive him and- 
He sighed, and took a sip of tea. 
There was no fixing this, was there? 
Leo only ignored him for a couple of days. He'd bounced between a couple of random beaches on the West Coast before returning that same night. Donnie watched his tracker for a while that first day. How he seemed to be pacing a lot. Like he was deciding whether or not to forgive Donnie. 
Which, he shouldn't. Except when he was doing that open and honest thing with Mikey, Mikey told him not to think like that. Because it wasn't his fault, even though Donnie was pretty sure it was. 
As much as he hated discussing his feelings, it kind of…helped. A little. It made him less sure that Leo was going to hate him forever, at least. But not entirely sure, as he would have liked to been. 
Finally, after two days of the cold shoulder, Leo came and knocked on his lab door. Donnie was trying to distract himself with work, but he'd been having trouble with the coding on Shelldon 4.0 and it was leaving him more frustrated than distracted. 
Then again, he'd been trying to replicate Sheldon for nearly 6 months now with hardly any progress. That would frustrate anybody. 
“ I took a nap earlier, Raph, I'm not going to bed anytime soon!” He sighed, knowing it was probably Raph trying to get him to sleep, like he usually did. He did nap earlier, so at least he wasn't lying. 
“ Not Raph,” 
Donnie turned to see Leo standing in the doorway instead, leaning up against the frame with a faint frown. 
“ oh..” Donnie didn't know what to say. He could apologize again, but he didn't know if it would make things better or worse. He couldn’t tell what Leo was thinking. It seemed he could never tell these days. 
Leo sighed and shut the door behind him, stepping into the lab without invitation. Not that he needed it. As much as Donnie liked to protest his presence, he never really minded it. He would lock the door if he didn't want Leo to come in, after all. 
“ So…I’ve been thinking..” Leo murmured, rubbing at his arms a bit, “ I don't…I don't think its…that terrible that you…saw everything…”
Donnie blinked in surprise. It was about the last thing he thought Leo would say, especially knowing how well Leo held a grudge. 
“ I just mean- maybe it's…not so bad to have someone else know and all…” He continued, “ cause- cause at least someone else can tell me it was real. And it’s okay to be…upset and- ughhh, this is too real for me right now!” 
He ran a hand down his face and looked at Donnie. 
“ I just- I don't want you to, like, pity me or- or- think I'm…weak or fucking whatever..” He muttered, cheeks pink, “ cause I survived, didn't I? And- and I’m fine, so-” 
Donnie chuckled faintly. He dropped what he was doing and buried his face in his hands. He wanted to scream. 
“ I didn't think that for even a second,” He sighed, leaning back in his chair, “ Leo, you may be an idiot, but you're one of the strongest idiots I know. Slash SRS on the strongest part and slash j on the idiot part, just in case that wasn't clear” 
Leo snorted, leaning against Donnie's desk, “We’re not really good at this open and honest stuff, are we?” 
“ No, and I never claimed to be,” Donnie sighed. He stood up and opened his arms for a hug. He kind of needed it himself, actually. 
Leo gave him a tight squeeze back and they stood in the silence of the lab together for another moment before Donnie finally, lightly pushed him away. 
“ Okay, enough lovey-dovey twin stuff,” Donnie sighed, “ are you…mad at me?” 
He hated that he couldn't tell just from the hug alone, but he needed to know. He needed to know Leo wasn't gonna hate him forever, even if he seemed to have forgiven the action. 
“ No, I'm not mad at you,” Leo sighed, “ I just want..I want everything to go back to normal. I know it…it probably won't, but I can dream, right?” 
Donnie sighed, slumping back into his chair, “i don't think it will go back to Normal normal. But…I will try my best to make it feel that way,”
Leo leaned back against his desk with a faint smile, crossing his arms and watching as Donnie got back to work. 
And it was about as normal as it could have been. 
No curse. No grudges. No looming worries, for now. 
---
this is not a great ending, I am super aware of that, but sometimes it's good to just finish the thing. I do wanna write a REAL fic for 50au, okay? And I will eventually. This was a decent start at the very least.
So that's how it ends. Keepin' it open ended was a good idea methinks. The google doc for this is lik 50,000 words (minus the 1000 for the OTHER outline i did at the beginning) and like 130 pages so yay?
Enjoy (or don't)
part 1 | Part 33
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featureenvyproductions · 3 days ago
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This post touched on physical media for drawing which is good but I want to add my ramblings about physical drawings as well because these days there's a lot of emphasis on drawing digitally, to the point where I think it's been an actual decade since I've come across a tutorial where someone has drawn things physically on paper....Like, don't underestimate the power of drawing on paper and learning to use physical media. Yeah it's not going to do anything in terms of your popularity 👀👀💧 but at the moment, you've also got an extra layer of protection between you and AI since the best physical art AI could probably do with current technology is something akin to "printing" out a picture with a writing utensil of some sort since mimicking real physical technique from photos of paintings or drawings is quite a bit harder than weighting pixels and outputting them into a file.
I'm also telling you this for corporate reasons. The way the world is going, there's going to come a day when there are no free programs for drawing, and certainly tablets and computers won't be free or cheap, and they're going to demand all your personal information to even boot up. You'll be locked into selling all your data and locking yourself into subscriptions just to have some artistic expression. Do you want that? Adobe and apple can do a lot but they can't fucking take away your paper and pencil. You should learn to use them if only to take back power from corporations. It's why even though I do use digital tools a lot for comic color because it's faster and I'm just one person, I still do almost everything else physically (ink/pencil/layouts/etc). I have a box the size of a large coffin with all the comic book pages I've drawn in my adult life, and the only way Adobe is getting their hands on them or removing my access to them is by banging down my front door or burning my house down.
Sure, technology makes our lives easier, but if you learn to use physical mediums, no one can ever take art away from you or keep you from creating it (at least not EASILY without some seriously oppressive changes) and it's going to be a very long time (maybe not even in our lifetimes) that the corporate ability to do so is finally nerfed.
And yeah you don't need fancy shit. I do all my rough sketching on printer paper with a mechanical pencil, or with a cheap ass sketch book I carry around. Especially if it's just for you practicing and no one is going to see it, you do not need fancy things. Your ancestors ground stuff up and dipped their hands in it and smacked a cave wall. This is your RIGHT to make shit by whatever means necessary whether you think it's instagram worthy or not. (I even outlined what you can use for animation from dollar tree if you're broke in a series of posts if that's a thing you want to do https://www.tumblr.com/featureenvyproductions/752966738522619904/my-thoughts-on-how-to-do-basically-kinda-cel?source=share)
And that's another thing too, don't worry if it sucks. I promise it doesn't, because you made something. And also even if you think it does because you're not meeting your goal or whatever, you have to shake the 10000 bad drawings out of your wrist before you get to the good stuff. Even someone like me who's been drawing [seriously anyway] for 25+ years has to warm up a bit before churning out something serious. Just do it I promise it's fine. (And also if you have the ability to take a figure drawing and/or life drawing class do that because in my experience it helps)
(Also not that I'm that great at art still compared to a lot of artists, I have been at it for a long long time, so if anyone who sees my stuff ever wants to know how I did something, please ask me, I will tell you free tips, I love info dumping, there is no such thing as a stupid question,,,,the greatest compliment is being asked how I did something,,,you do not understand,,,,to me democratizing art means ensuring YOU no matter who you are, can make some of it)
Can't afford art school?
After seeing post like this 👇
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And this gem 👇
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As well as countless of others from the AI generator community. Just talking about how "inaccessible art" is, I decided why not show how wrong these guys are while also helping anyone who actually wants to learn.
Here is the first one ART TEACHERS! There are plenty online and in places like youtube.
📺Here is my list:
Proko (Free)
Marc Brunet (Free but he does have other classes for a cheap price. Use to work for Blizzard)
Aaron Rutten (free)
BoroCG (free)
Jesse J. Jones (free, talks about animating)
Jesus Conde (free)
Mohammed Agbadi (free, he gives some advice in some videos and talks about art)
Ross Draws (free, he does have other classes for a good price)
SamDoesArts (free, gives good advice and critiques)
Drawfee Show (free, they do give some good advice and great inspiration)
The Art of Aaron Blaise ( useful tips for digital art and animation. Was an animator for Disney)
Bobby Chiu ( useful tips and interviews with artist who are in the industry or making a living as artist)
Second part BOOKS, I have collected some books that have helped me and might help others.
📚Here is my list:
The "how to draw manga" series produced by Graphic-sha. These are for manga artist but they give great advice and information.
"Creating characters with personality" by Tom Bancroft. A great book that can help not just people who draw cartoons but also realistic ones. As it helps you with facial ques and how to make a character interesting.
"Albinus on anatomy" by Robert Beverly Hale and Terence Coyle. Great book to help someone learn basic anatomy.
"Artistic Anatomy" by Dr. Paul Richer and Robert Beverly Hale. A good book if you want to go further in-depth with anatomy.
"Directing the story" by Francis Glebas. A good book if you want to Story board or make comics.
"Animal Anatomy for Artists" by Eliot Goldfinger. A good book for if you want to draw animals or creatures.
"Constructive Anatomy: with almost 500 illustrations" by George B. Bridgman. A great book to help you block out shadows in your figures and see them in a more 3 diamantine way.
"Dynamic Anatomy: Revised and expand" by Burne Hogarth. A book that shows how to block out shapes and easily understand what you are looking out. When it comes to human subjects.
"An Atlas of animal anatomy for artist" by W. Ellenberger and H. Dittrich and H. Baum. This is another good one for people who want to draw animals or creatures.
Etherington Brothers, they make books and have a free blog with art tips.
As for Supplies, I recommend starting out cheap, buying Pencils and art paper at dollar tree or 5 below. For digital art, I recommend not starting with a screen art drawing tablet as they are more expensive.
For the Best art Tablet I recommend either Xp-pen, Bamboo or Huion. Some can range from about 40$ to the thousands.
💻As for art programs here is a list of Free to pay.
Clip Studio paint ( you can choose to pay once or sub and get updates)
Procreate ( pay once for $9.99)
Blender (for 3D modules/sculpting, ect Free)
PaintTool SAI (pay but has a 31 day free trail)
Krita (Free)
mypaint (free)
FireAlpaca (free)
Libresprite (free, for pixel art)
Those are the ones I can recall.
So do with this information as you will but as you can tell there are ways to learn how to become an artist, without breaking the bank. The only thing that might be stopping YOU from using any of these things, is YOU.
I have made time to learn to draw and many artist have too. Either in-between working two jobs or taking care of your family and a job or regular school and chores. YOU just have to take the time or use some time management, it really doesn't take long to practice for like an hour or less. YOU also don't have to do it every day, just once or three times a week is fine.
Hope this was helpful and have a great day.
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apoptoses · 2 days ago
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Armand, Haussmann, and Paris:
The thing about Paris that's not really discussed in the VC books themselves is the Haussmann project.
In 1853 Napoleon III commissioned Haussman to completely renovate Paris. The plan was to tear down all of the old structures and rebuild the city; reorganizing the streets and reshaping them to accommodate more green spaces, and replacing smaller buildings with taller apartment blocks in more uniform style.
The Paris Armand knew when he arrived as the coven master and which he came to know as the theater leader would have looked something like this:
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Dark, winding streets leading off wide boulevards and short, leaning buildings.
The Haussman project would see all of these places systematically torn down, occupants removed to other areas of the city while new buildings were put in their place. In some areas workers were destroying and rebuilding things 24 hours a day.
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At this time Armand would have been living at the theater on the boulevard du Temple, Paris's street of theaters:
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This dagguerotype shows the boulevard in 1838. This painting, in 1862, looks much the same:
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But by 1863 all but one theater on the street had been destroyed, and that was only because that theater was on the opposite side of the street shown in the painting. How and why it wasn't pulled down, I don't know- no information on it seems to exist, just like no explanation for the very small handful of other old structures that were left untouched.
That theater, the Théâtre Déjazet, still exists today. But it was established in 1770 by Comte de Artois, so while it could have been Anne's inspiration for Armand's theater it's not the 'rickety wooden rat trap' that seats 300 that Lestat describes in TVL.
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Anyways, knowing all of this, I think it makes even more sense why Armand so quickly grabbed onto Louis and was ready to run away with him at any cost.
Armand, who'd been kidnapped from the monks, who'd had his palazzo torn out from under him, who'd established something of an existence under Les Innocents and was then ripped out of that world when the cemetery was destroyed. Who was watching the city he'd finally come to know get systematically torn apart. Everything that was familiar to him was being taken again.
So why not let Louis burn the theater? He arrived in Paris in 1870, just as Haussman was dismissed. But the work of destroying and rebuilding Paris was set to carry on. Chances were the Theatre de Vampires would be next, and if that were the case there's no way the crypts beneath the place would remain safe and undiscovered.
And if he'd stayed where would they go during the renovation? What would they do? What would the point be in continuing trying to run a coven he was bored of and a life he didn't care for in a new location?
Armand was going to have to begin again somewhere- better that be with Louis, out in the world, than roaming a now unfamiliar Paris. And even though he didn't burn the theater himself, allowing/instigating Louis to do it still gave him more control than letting a stranger come in at some unpredictable moment to demolish things all over again.
(And what of Lestat, what does he feel about these changes? He never could have shown Louis the Paris he knew and loved, which existed when Louis was still mortal- that Paris was largely gone)
Chances were Anne might not have known most of this at the time she wrote interview or even TVL. But I think it still makes a lot of sense and brings up a point about Armand and immortality that I don't see brought up much- that not only do vampires lose every mortal they've ever known, but with time they also see the destruction of every place they've ever known or loved.
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(ps: I'm not an expert on this topic or anything, so if anyone does know why some buildings were unchanged or has any interesting historical info to add by all means please, reblog and add it on!)
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inc0mple · 3 days ago
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🗝️ ”Keys Are People, Too” 100 Chapter Q&A ⭐️ (ongoing!)
(Last edit: 12/20 10:40 CST)
Hi! :) If y’all don’t know me my name is Inco (it’s not but shh) and I write a fanfiction for Cinderella Boy called Keys Are People, Too. It’s not finished, it’s ongoing and rapidly approaching 100 chapters XD (yes we are like four chapters away but shh rounding) (I PROMISE WE’RE ALMOST TO THE LAST ACT). So because of an ask from @isitamia and, we’ll say the 100 chapter milestone… tada Q&A??
I don’t know how many people are going to engage with this but that’s totally okay :) I love ranting about stuff and I’ve put a lot of thought into this story, so it would be cool to have an outlet to answer some questions where they don’t get forgotten in AO3 comments. And if you guys also have general questions about writing advice/things like that, I am not an expert but I do also like talking about stories.
So please ask! I’m not planning to close this at any specific time—I was thinking y’all could comment questions under this post or via reblogs (I might miss them in reblogs though) and I will edit this post to answer them, and also reply to you so you know your question is answered. This might get like 10 notes and that’s fine haha (I have zero idea how many people regularly read my story beyond the ones who leave comments), but if there are a lot of questions I’ll try to categorize them. Really just a place to drop info for fun :)
Q&A below ⬇️
I tried to make it organized. It's... kind of organized. Kind of.
Plot/Characters
"What key archetype isn't one of the siblings? Do we get to know their archetypes soon?" asked by @spookieee28 12/20
I'm not gonna say the archetypes at this point in time because it risks spoilers. You will find out by the end of the story and hopefully by that points all of the archetypes should be relatively clear. Some have already been mentioned like the chapter "Heralds and Thieves" for Jade and Cooper, I think (?) Cora has been mentioned as the Innocent archetype, etcetera.
"Which character do you struggle writing the most and which feels easier for you, if you have preferences?" asked by @isitamia 12/20
"Do you ever struggle with keeping Cinderella Boy's canon characters in character?" asked by @isitamia 12/20
I'll answer both of these together. Chase is pretty easy for me because I just channel chaotic gremlin energy and it seems to work. Buddy is OKAY although I am struggling right now making him vulnerable while still retaining him Buddy-ish-ness if that makes sense? Deacon is just Deacon... I am sorry, I feel like I don't really do anything to characterize him, he's just there as a sounding board XD I will say- I daydream situations for CB ALL THE TIME which gives me a lot of comfortability with the canon characters and considering what they would do and say and how they would react. I do have a little bit of difficulty characterizing the human keys so I just kinda went like "oh WELL that's because, UUHHHH, the key siblings don't match the keys exactly! That's it that's the answer!" because I felt like Silver wasn't quite Silver-ish and stuff. As for struggling writing the most I have two main answers.
BRONTE. For those who maybe haven't read this but are scrolling through it anyway, or aren't there yet, Bronte is the "human" version of Bronze and I kinda accidentally eliminated him from the story until like... the 80th chapte ror something like that. I had a lot of trouble actually writing his dialogue and scenes with Chase. It just did not have Bronze's snarky energy. So that was tough and I feel bad because I really feel like I did not do him justice :c
DUKE RAVENELL!!!!!! Ravenell hates me. He gives me so much trouble primarily because I just plunked him in at the beginning and didn't give him a real personality beyond a few vague notions. I've really had to sculpt his character as I went and it's especially difficult because Ravenell is intended to do a lot of plot device-ing. He perpetuates a lot of themes in the story and he is a HUGE character foil to Chase, because he often reflects the opposite of Chase's (and Idonea's) values and intentions. I want him to be morally grey and I am constantly fighting a BATTLE with this man to make sure he isn't too likeable or too hateable. I posted on Tumblr like a week ago really just asking for a diagnostic and the response made my day because people are all OVER the place about this man, some people love him, some will never forgive him, some are like "he's alright but there's something off about him and I can't help but distrust him" and others are like "I know he keeps making mistakes but I can't help but trust him" and I LOVE IT. Fortunately I think he's finally in a place perception-wise where I want him. I want the confusion. So badly. Only now I have to continue to fight this stupid tug-o'-war to keep him properly dividing until the end of the story XD
Behind the scenes
"How did you come up with the plot for KAPT? Was it just a little thought that popped up in your head one day, or did you have like inspiration or something?" asked by @xcitrix 12/20
"Did you have an idea for how you wanted the story to end when you first started writing or did you come up with more ideas while working on it?" asked by @lapileaf 12/20
I'mma answer both of these (and any others if they are asked) in kinda the same go if that's alright. In August I was wanting to write some fanfiction for CB, and one idea rotating in my head was, what if Chase went into a nonfiction book? Like he thought it the most effective way to study for a history project, or he saw a mention of Ex Libris, or something. So, completely directionless, I drabbled out the first chapter of KAPT where they find the book in the museum and... adopt it. And then it sat there in my Google Docs for like two weeks while I worked on a different fanfiction, Violets and Chains. I tried to return to it a little bit and got through the first anthology chapter where they're in the Chartesia battle, but that too did not have a plot behind it, I was like "myeh... trebuchets... uh... and now there's a guy... oh maybe they're PRISONERS..." And then brain did not work and I gave up. Eventually got myself together, BS-ed the rest of the scene, and then sat down and essentially ranted to myself about potential ideas until I figured out the plot.
More ideas have kept cropping up as I've worked on it. There are certain puzzle pieces that are foreshadowed in even teh first ten chapters that I didn't even mean to foreshadow because I hadn't thought of the yet - the plot was generally mapped out but has defintely been refined and added to as time goes on. Eventually you get into the flow of a story and everything just starts clicking into place, like you yourself are theorizing about an external work. Keep in mind that because I am publishing it as I write each chapter, KAPT is a first draft, and I have to hatch out plot points and main parts of the story as I write and make my best effort to recover any loose threads or things like that. It's a fun exercise!
"Do you plan to stick to the story you have already till the end or is there a possiblity you'll have to change some things if we get to know more about canon Ex Libris/Buddy lore while it's still ongoing?" asked by @iwikpines 12/20
There are some new bits of information that are kinda iffy for KAPT, but ultimately because KAPT takes place inside a book most of the Buddy/Ex Libris lore is not applicable. Regarding Buddy's situation I am going to go ahead like I was planning to originally, and I'll add a disclaimer when time permits. I don't think either way throws a wrench in the plans too much but I would rather be confident in the themes I've already set up as opposed to trying to hastily recover new lore in the last third of the story, if that makes sense.
"How did you come up with your ocs? I know some, like Jaime, come from another original story of yours ... but what about characters like Ravenell, Galeus, and Rose? What inspired you? How did you decide their personaltiy, their struggles? Did you take inspiration from yourself for anyone, similar to how Punko took inspiration from herself for Chase? Do you follow any specific process to come up with ocs, like follow a list, scheme, or coming up with hypothetical scneraios?" asked by @isitamia 12/20
A lot of the characters are cameos from a passion project I've been working on for years called IFI (no I will not tell you what it stands for) - Jaime and emma are from there, as well as several others including Alexei, Nishan, Mattheo, Kelitia, Indie (the Marchioness), King Aarius, and King Olivyn. So those are just plunked in and then Jaime decided to become part of the plot. As for the other original characters made specifically for KAPT, they just kinda got plopped in for one reason or another (I wanted Rose to connect to the Chartesia lore, Ravenell to have a foil for Chase, and Galeus because, well, there had to be a king) and then I slowly worked to build connections, themes, and character. Often times I don't specifically sit down and think "this character will be this way", it just emerges naturally from their dialogue, like I'm chiseling something out that was already in the stone like an archeologist, as opposed to carving my own new sculpture. I've always written that way and it makes it difficult when I am required to add structure to my writing or explain why I do things the way I do. I will say it is all VERY inspired from my own life and beliefs; Rose exists as a confidante in the story, and many of her more preachy dialogue pieces are things I'm getting out of my system. So yeah, not really a lot of structure to it, they just appear... and I figure them out as I go... most of my characters are in some way facets of myself or the way I percieve life. As I get more experienced with writing I'm sure I'll be more intentional with them, but for now, they are Athena and I am Zeus.
"How do you post daily" (kind of) asked by @isitamia 12/20
To give an actual answer for this because I know it's a lot to post a 2-4k chapter PER DAY - I am a student and have a LOT of downtime in class where I can't really do anything but write. That is how. Also, I have taught myself to be a prolific writer because that is the thing in my life I can always rely on when other things are unstable.
"How did you extend the story so far? I love the plot and it's kinda insane how you were able to develop it so much, at this point it's a full novel and I kinda live for it LOL. Also how long would you consider one act?" asked by @shyve3 12/20
Two parts to this question, I will answer them both;
I didn't mean to. I am really bad about being concise; I can't. When I write and get passionate about a story there's so much I want to stay and I can rarely fit it into what most people consider a pallatable length. I just get going and... idk... unstoppable force or something lol. And yes KAPT is at least the length of a typical trilogy XD ITS BEEN FIVE MONTHS
Regarding the act question, I ORIGINALLY said KAPT would be three acts, with the first ending when Chase goes down into Rose's "tomb" for the first time, the second ending with the Bronte part, and the third being the final one. It is actually more like four now, with the "second" act split into two at the masquerade ball. We are so close to being onto the actual final act, which should be a 4th of the total fic, so we have maybe 30 chapters left (?) (we'll see lol)
I don't have a specific length, it's just the way the story tends to ebb and flow if that makes sense?
General stuff
"Do you have any advice as a writer?" asked by @iwikpines 12/20
I AM SO BAD ABOUT THIS because I really do just go type type type and words appear. I know there's more to it than that but I've spent a lot of time writing and not a lot of time learning how to write so I have the experience without the actual education behind it. Write what you care about :) I mean NO DUH but like - your best stories will come from the heart. You will find prolificness (is that a word?) in PASSION. If I didn't care about Cinderella Boy or the themes I'm trying to communicate in KAPT would I spent my days writing a chapter a day ABSOLUTELY FRIGGIN NOT I'd be writing a different story. So yeah - write what you love and your audience will find you. What the world needs is a buncha people doing what they love really well because it's what they care about. Also, I didn't include your full comment here, but I am excited to read your fanfiction! <3 Please post it on Tumblr when you also post it elsewhere!
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