#Antoine my beloved what the hell is that thing

[wardensantoineandevka]

I love that no explicit explanation ever turned up (at least that I've seen) for what the hell that mechanical device is that Antoine fiddles with while he paces the Grey Hold, so we're forced to conclude that, given Antoine's specialty, it is probably a bomb

[vchroniclesin2022]

Thank you for your answers!

So many people enjoy Sam's Lestat and who can blame them, Sam is amazing and we are starving.

Nonetheless, I can't see book!lestat in AMC!lestat. And I'm deeply sad about it, because I deeply love book Lestat, and I have been loving him for 15+ years. He's that important to me, yes.

I'm sincere, book!Louis and AMC!Louis are clearly deeply different and nonetheless I see book!Louis in AMC!Louis without any problems.

So I've decided to write a list of the ways AMC!Lestat is very very very OOC.

Of course, if you like AMC! Lestat more power to you! I'm sincerely happy you are enjoying the show! I'm just whining about things I personally didn't like.

Lestat beating Louis up. It has never happened, and as matter of fact it's a plot point. Lestat acknowledges he's a monster but not that kind of monster. And for who picks some passages of the books: a shove is not nice but it's not a freefall from the sky after a savage beating.

Lestat menacing, hurting, scaring Claudia. Lestat hating and wanting to kill Claudia. This is where the show 100% lost me. Claudia is Lestat's princess, his darling daughter, he loves and adores her. He never tried to hurt her, and he sure as hell never wanted her dead. Even after she tried to kill him and almost managed to do it. Lestat loves Claudia even after her death, and hallucinates her several times. Also, him and Louis mourning for their lost daughter is very important for Loustat.

Lestat is sensitive, artistic, romantic, charismatic, capable of great tenderness, impulsive. AMC!Lestat is overbearing and weird instead of charismatic, shouts very often and his moments of tenderness are few. Reading Lestat screaming "Putain de merde" in fics has me reacting with "He would not say that"!

Lestat was abused by his family, but he managed to break the circle. He never repeated what was done to him. As matter of fact, he mourned his family and dreamed of turning his brothers, their wives, their sons. He took care of his father and at the very end he could not kill him, not even for mercy. What a difference from AMC!Lestat, who mistreats Claudia like he was mistreated.

His whole cheating affair with Antoinette. Yes, book!Lestat had Antoine, but just at the end, after decades of living together with Louis. A Louis who at times showed his desire for Lestat and at times negated their relationship. When Louis and Lestat start a proper relationship in Prince Lestat trilogy, Lestat doesn't have eyes for anyone else. In this context, where they are practically married, Lestat having a sidepiece doesn't make any sense.

The whole thing of running away with Louis and Antoinette after killing Claudia. WTF. Book!Lestat is horrified by the sheer stupidity , and book!Lestat has pretty stupid moments.

Book!Lestat has moments of deep vulnerability, of tenderness, of reflection. See: the discussions with Nicki, his melancholy, the loving description of Louis, the cry at Marius to please don't send him away, his femininity. AMC!Lestat resembles a caricature, almost always shouting, being vulgar, boisterous.

I could go on but you catched the idea.

In short, I feel robbed by one of my most ancient and beloved blorbos, and I feel very sad about it.

[retvenkos]

anyways i guess i'm a portwell stan now (enemies to lovers/best friends brother/make each other better trope & troy and gabriella parallels my beloved)

and i'm also exasperated at the writers at ricky's path this season. and the writers in general.

i just. want miss jenn and mr mazzara to get together this season and ej and gina to be happy, if that's too much to ask for.

AND WHY DOES THERE HAVE TO BE SO MANY LOVE TRIANGLES????

nobody wants it, they're not needed- all this season has been about romance, with a few crumbs of musical theatre, and it's not what i signed up for! i want more friendship moments between kourtney and seb, and i want more of the dorky improv games.

let the kids be kids.

the north high rivalry is getting unrealistically annoying. if anything, the theatre community is supportive of each other (i'm in a performing arts school, i should know lmbo)

ricky's parents' divorce plot was completely thrown out the window.

nobody wanted the redlyn angst.

why is carlos being kinda mean?

this whole has season has been a mess, and the only people carrying the show on their backs now is ej, gina, mr. mazzara and howie's rendition of "if i can't love her".

i'm so sorry for vomiting this all over you, i just felt this show is going downhill- kinda like glee.

dfghjdsfghjhgfdsdfghjhgfd,,, i haven't watched glee but i know enough about it to know that was a sick burn, cass. i love it.

and omg,,,,, do i have thoughts™. let's unpack them, shall we?

i agree that this season has been..... a lot™. it’s just a cluster of half-baked plot points that are strung together really losely. i feel like they should have scaled back on some of their ambitions.

namely, the north high rivalry is really bland and unnecessary. the only good things to come out of it is howie, the song around you, and the stunning location (i mean, art deco ogden high? count me in). you could take out the menkies entirely and so little would change to the overall story. i’d argue the story could have been even better without it because.... big shock..... we could focus on the characters.

because, truly, they’re trying to tackle too many things at once. whatever angst is happening with carlos and seb is the worst developed plot point we’ve had to suffer through. carlos says “does chip have any big scenes?” and it’s the catalyst for a fight? then we have them split for spring break and it’s just snippets of them fighting? literally, there’s zero reason for seb and carlos to fight - their dynamic is cute but it’s background chatter when you have whatever the hell is happening with ricky, nini, ej, and gina front and center. there was no reason to make then fight and it doesn’t add to their development, it isn’t well executed, and it isn’t particularly interesting. just let them be happy?

and i feel like that’s such a running theme for all of the side relationships? like you said - redlyn didn’t really need angst? i feel like the whole “career day” arc was well done and was compelling (but maybe that’s just because i had a friend who went through the same thing as red, so i’m sympathetic to it), but whatever went on with antoine and ashlyn was just.... really unnecessary? it didn’t add anything? maybe they’ll be revisiting the plot point, but as it stands right now, it was just really random to add in, and perhaps if i were more invested with north high, i would appreciate it more. but they’re.... so inconsequential.

and now we get to talk about one of my biggest gripes,,,,,,, ricky’s parents’ divorce. listen, i thought it was well developed in season one. it had importance. it affected ricky. it affected the plot. it raised the stakes. now it’s just underdeveloped. we’ve barely seen ricky’s homelife, given the sheer amount of plot points the show is juggling, and since ricky has mainly had negative scenes through the totality of the season, viewers aren’t really interested in seeing how the crumbs of his tumultuous homelife are affecting his behavior (which is kind of important, seeing as it accounts for the degradation of his character). 

ricky is going through a lot this season, and i feel like the main reason why people are so upset with him is because the writers leaned into his sad boi™ status. maybe it’s because the screentime is so divided and the stakes are higher, or because the writers really just got rid of all of ricky’s personality, but ricky has had two personality traits this season - sad clingy boi and bitter, passive aggressive boi. 

now, these personality appeared in season one - quite a lot, actually - but because it was framed  between light hearted moments and exploration of his conflicts, it was palatable and understandable. viewers understood why ricky was so desperately clinging onto the past and resisted change so much. we saw the tempest he was in! we had moments where friends like big red or even gina mentioned it. his reactions had merit because the viewer saw the buildup! 

this season, we have not had that. we see ricky’s dad trying to do his best with moving out, and with trying to move on, and we see ricky’s mom trying to do the same, and this is all strong for them, but when ricky can’t move on, and we see less of the struggle that ricky feels, we become disenchanted. ricky has stagnated, and we see everyone else moving on, and we do not focus on hat influences ricky to stop dead in his tracks. 

what’s worse is that the writers have ricky blow up so much more than last season, when we see less reasoning, and when he mentions how his parent’s divorce is a main reason for his angst, we really have no basis for that - except for what we saw in season 1. season 1 isn’t enough anymore, though, because ricky’s dad has moved on! so has ricky’s mom! 

i’m just scREAMING because ricky’s story is important and it was done well in season 1 and now the writers are losing ricky in the crossfire and pulling out the most degraded, negative traits of his character and running with them.

where is the ricky bowen i love and miss????

and lol, i’ve spoken so much about north high already, but i agree 10000% that it’s just getting out of hand. it’s just so not realistic. the rivalries aren’t like this,,,, someone please make it stop. they north high kids are also just so underdeveloped? the only exception is howie, and we didn’t even know he was a north high kid for half of the show,,,,,, (which, imo, should have been built up much better. kourtney said they never hung out with his friends, but we should have seen that so the mystery was more fulfilling. we should have also gotten hints he was in theatre - maybe kourtney hears him sing beauty and the beast, and she thinks it’s vvv cute, and she asks him he didn’t try out, and howie has to do some mental gymnastics to come up with a decent lie.) 

there’s so much poor or just underdeveloped writing in this season,,,, i’m crying.

even gina (my beloved) is the subject of poor writing because literally what happened between her and ricky? she was so emotionally involved she was about to leave, and then she suddenly decides to stay? and she suddenly just ignores ricky? girl worked through all of that off camera and while it’s not bad per se, it’s just lazy. they just underdeveloped that entire story.

the only one who has really shined this season is ej, and that’s just... really out of left field, but i’m not complaining.

and, i mean, i could talk about my earlier gripes with nini, but i see that they’re making narrative sense, now that the show has progressed a little further. i just wish she had stayed at yac longer, or we had seen more of her, there, so that when she says “she liked who she was [at yac],” we would have more basis for that. and i kinda wish we saw more of her sans boy drama, but i’m sure that’s coming.

and the love triangles,,,,, don’t get me started. rina didn’t have to be angsty or happen at all,,,, they could have just been friends and it would have had the same effect. don’t believe me? they’re friends and they lean on each other, but then nini comes into the picture and ricky just wants to be with nini all the time. he starts to really blow gina off and gina wonders if they were ever friends at all, or if she was just a cardboard cut out that ricky projected nini onto. the angst happens, gina realizes she has friends with carlos, she has that moment with ashlyn that gets fixed, then gina gets close to ej,,,,, literally no difference.

and lol, mr. mazzara. i think he and miss jenn are vvv cute together - definitely my favorite out of the miss jenn romances. i love a good slow burn, so i’m willing to wait for an eternity to have it. i just think they’re neat.

[ninjakasuga]

Sonsal Celebration Day 6

Day Six of the celebration of best furry couple by @boundforfreedomsonsal continues! Admittedly I’ve been watching eagerly for this day as this was honestly the first of the prompts I worked on. Having finished reading @archiesoniconline ‘s fan-project version of issue 249 and 250 (in which Sally was deroboticized huzzah) and the signs of Sally dealing with the obvious aftermath; I was inspired. Add in inspiration from a few pages of Glitcher’s Sonic Retold series, and well I had material to work with. I recommend if you want to see a faithful fan continuation of the pre-reboot Archie-Sonic era give ASO, a shot or even pay Glitcher’s DA page ( https://www.deviantart.com/glitcher ) a visit. Since the old comics are never going to see an official revisit we fans are the only ones who will see our beloved characters flourish so give these guys and other fan projects a looksie! Also the lovely, AMAZING art work provided for this prompt was by the amazing @foxinadress​  seriously this amazing artist deserves praise. I recommend not only giving his Tumblr a visit but check their various art platforms and Patreon.

One last Author note; there is some pushing of the PG-13 as per usual, but at this point you guys expect that from me. XD Also while this takes place in my little Sonic fic-verse, it’s out of chronological order, taking place between the Double Date and Surprise prompt episodes.

HURT:

Looking out at the forest beyond Sally Acorn didn��t seem to pay mind to the setting sun, nor did she react to the sounds of the far off cheers coming from the city nearby. There was a lot to celebrate, between the Deathegg being put out of commission, for Naugus being exposed and dealt with, everyone was in a party mood. As much as she didn’t care to dwell on it, the Princess knew a chunk of the celebration was for her own safe return after spending a few months as Mecha Sally.

A few horrible, painful months where she felt like she was trapped inside her own body, unable to do anything but the screaming impulses of Eggman’s whim. She’d be lying if she didn’t thoroughly enjoy seeing his shattered expression as he fled from the Deathegg as the vile creation was torn apart by explosions before crashing into one of his bases it was poised above. It almost made up for the hell she endured.

Yet that joy felt somehow hollow still and it bugged her incessantly. She was back home, her friends and family safe, the Kingdom was safe, and yet… Sally couldn’t fully feel right. She did not feel like she deserved to be there, enjoying the celebration with everyone else. The squirrel-munk hated how she felt, not when her friends, and especially a certain Hedgehog, fought like hell to get her back. Closing her eyes Sally felt the raging memories she tried to suppress coming back. Of her time as Mecha-Sally, from being used as a tool to harm, maim, and kill her friends. Thankfully the latter never happened, but plenty of the former happened; and then there was the recollection of when she was weaponized.

A deep shudder ran through her as she curled her legs closer to her chest, her breathing reaching almost hyperventilating levels as she tried to fight down the terror and panic. By the Neo-Walkers, the Almighty, and any Deity that truly was out there, it was like watching someone dismember you and be AWAKE through it all! In lieu of blood was oil, and yet every part ripped out might as well have been an appendage or organ! While a Robian was made of wires and metal they still had a ‘core’ representing their life-force. When Eggman was taking her apart and enjoying it, her ‘core vitals’ went crazy as if even as a machine her body and true mind knew of the violation being done to her. She nearly died just because Eggman wanted to be sadistic as he prepped her to be a killing machine against all she loved.

Even a week after being deroboticized, she couldn’t shake those vague but potent recollections. Sally was able to suppress and bury most of her trauma by focusing on deposing Naugus before he took the Kingdom down with him, but now that she was left alone to her thoughts; she couldn’t drown it all out.

So lost in her own mind, her ears didn’t even twitch as a familiar ‘sonic-boom’ echoed nearby, signaling the arrival of a certain someone. The flag on the pole she sat beside on the hill of FF Headquarters, began to wave and bob from the sudden gust of wind, along with her hair and vest. Yet Sally didn’t truly seem to pay attention any until a warm hand, gently settled on her shoulder.

“Yo Sal, you okay?! You’re shaking all over!” A concerned voice uttered as the hand moved from her shoulder, and now two entire arms began to gently wrap around her, pulling her into the lap of the owner of said arms. At the feel of his warmth behind her back, Sally instinctively nestled against him, and let out a shaky breath. “I-I’m okay Sonic, jus-just a little chilly is all.”

“Bullshi-er-baloney…” Quipped back the fastest Hedgehog alive as he self-censored himself from uttering a more potent and crass choice of phrase. As he gently rested his chin atop her head, Sonic softly began to gently sway his body, rocking Sally in their embrace as he sought to help her deal with her woes. “You can’t pull a fast one over on me, I know you Sally, and this?” He gestured to her entirely. “This ain’t the wind giving you chills.” His usual jovial tone was dialed all the way to deep concern as his hands remained locked around her waist. “Talk to me Sal, please talk to me.”

Swallowing hard, Sally none-the-less tried to ease his concern with false-assurance. Not easy when those emerald orbs looked at her like that. She loved his eyes but the way he looked at her with concern and love, it almost made things feel worse because she didn’t want him to worry about her. “It’s just a little shake, and bad memories I’ll be fine-.” Interrupting her, Sonic kept his tone even, but a firmness trickled in. “Sally, don’t play this off. Now isn’t the time to pretend you’re not hurting. We sent Naugus packin’ and Egg-butt is still reeling from his toys being broken. Right now the only thing this Hedgehog cares about is the well-being of the woman in my arms. You, numero uno, the one and only Princess Sally, Acorn. The woman I love.” His hand traced along her cheek, making her lip quiver. “You’re hurting, let me help you Sal, right now we have nothing to worry about but us right now. Don’t shut me out, not this time, or ever, please. Now’s the time to let it all out because we dunno when we might get another break.”

His pleas tugged at her heart-strings, his devotion and love for her making her feel wonderful; yet awful at the same time with how her conflicted mind felt. Yet those words she didn’t know she needed to hear, eroded what resistance had been left in Sally. She crumbled like a dam that had burst after too much neglect. Turning her body in his embrace, she buried her face into his neck and sobbed, and just gushed, everything in her spilling out in tandem with the hot tears, leaking from her eyes. “I still remember being weaponized, being taken apart piece by piece, Eggman not caring if he nearly killed me in the process. I saw my own limbs and other pieces just, discarded as he smiled and hummed to music!” A deep shudder ran through her body as she clung to Sonic even more. She began to hiccup but kept talking. “Then he sent me out after everyone… I wish it was a blur, but every image is potently burned into my brain! I remember being used against everyone… I-I almost killed you, my brother, Lupe, Antoine, everyone I cared for and loved… How I managed to not kill anyone I don’t know!”

Shaking her grip on him tightened as more hot tears rolled from her eyes, matting the fur of his shoulder and neck. “When I wasn’t out in the field he made plan out methods to attack the Kingdom, or how to use my knowledge of my friends to use psychological warfare to break you all… I was even tasked to come up with methods to-to assassinate everyone!” Her voice grew hoarse as the lump in her throat got worse, along with the hiccuping. “I made fifty plans for you alone…” 

Deep, burning anger, filled Sonic as much as his desire to comfort and console his best friend and love of his life. The latter won out, and so he mentally filed away his desire to race to wherever Eggman ran off too for the time being and pound his face into jelly. A rage that surpassed the killing desire he felt when fighting the original Robotnik one last time just burned in him, to the point it scared him. Mentally berating himself, Sonic tried to refocus his mind. Sally needed him, and not off fulfilling a vendetta. With one hand, he began to rub up and down her back gently, as the other rested against the back of her head; stroking her auburn tresses as she sobbed against him. “Oh, Sally…” Sonic wanted to make the pain all go away, but knowing he couldn’t just snap a finger and do so, the Hedgehog continued to cradle Sally in his arms.

Sonic was known for his fast-talking, use of quips, and using humor to play off the more dreary elements of what was going on. Keeping upbeat and focusing ahead and ready to move on without looking back much. This was not one of those times he could be flippant on the issue. Yet he wasn’t sure what to say, could he really say anything that could make it all better, even a little? He had to try. “That wasn’t you though-.”

Sally’s tear-stained face pulled away from Sonic’s chest, sending him a glare that could kill, if she didn’t look so emotionally wrecked. “Don’t bull-crap me Sonic Hedgehog, I remember doing all those things!! Me, all me! Eggman let me keep my free will so he could use my tactical prowess and memories and-.”

Interrupting her, Sonic let a low growl leave his throat as he shook his head fiercely. “That wasn’t you Sally Acorn!! I’ve been roboticized too, and I know how that song and dance went!” Shaking his head he placed a soft kiss to her forehead as he held her close still. “Buttnik didn’t give my mind as much leeway as Eggman gave you, but I wasn’t some common bot-job either. Point is you’re still programmed to follow their rules. Just like Robuttnik made me do as he wanted despite any freedom of tactical thinking he left me.” He grit his teeth trying to suppress both his memories of that time and his growing anger. 

“The same applies to you being made to follow that- that, F**King Egg-face’s orders!” He cried giving in and cursing, using a word even he rarely uttered which caused Sally to gasp and stare at him in shock. Something Sonic took advantage of to press on with his words. “Even if you were given some mental free-reign Eggman still wanted dominance and control, meaning he was still using you like a puppet. You were still doing things you did not want to do deep down, because the Sally I know, the Sally I love would never do any of that of her true free will.”

Lip quivering Sally sniffled again, her grip on him tightening some. A fresh wave of doubt, both of her current crisis and old ones creeping into her mind. “Sonic, why? Ho-how could you still love me after all I did? All that I put you and the others through-?”

He interrupted her again with a kiss, soft, and quick, after breaking it his hands gently frame her face. “Because I can, because I do love you, and want to help you through this. Just like you did for me after I was roboticized and used against you all. Remember I wanted to die, but you not only turned me back but helped me deal with the aftermath.” Gently ‘booping’ her nose, he flashed her one of his soft smiles. “I still owe you a makeup date since, well the last one got interrupted by all the blow-out from the Nicole paranoia.”

Softly hiccuping for a moment as she tried to compose herself, Sally found herself slowly smiling if just a thin one. “Even if your girlfriend is a mess? Sonic I-I don’t know if I can trust myself, even if a part of me knows you’re right…” Laying her hands over his, she shook as another wave of doubt and sadness took her. “That was still me, what if what I went through woke up some nasty side of me, a part of me that willingly became a monster to-to ‘get the job done’?”

Firming shaking his head, Sonic leans in, his nose touching hers as his emerald eyes stare into her soft blue peepers. “Then the monster’s gonna have’ta deal with having me around to poke her or wag a finger in her direction. That said I don’t think there’s a monster, just the most amazing woman ever doubting herself. I understand some of what you’re going through Sal, and what I don’t I’m still here to help you along the way. We’ll get through this together like we always do.”

A true, warm, and wide smile crept onto Sally’s face before outright overtaking it. Leaning closer, her forehead, and his touch as she let herself be lost in his emerald gaze. “I don’t deserve you.”

Making a ‘hmm’ of deep thought, the hedgehog just flashed his trademark cocky smile back at her. “Hmm, judges say that’s hogwash. I think the Princess deserves nice things.”

Sally lifted an eyebrow, her mouth quivering as she barely withheld making a ‘snerk’ sound. “So you’re a nice thing?”

“Ten out of ten agree, when you go Sonic, you don’t go back.” He chimed in a sing-song, cheesy tone. Just happy to see her expression lighting up.

A happy laugh left Sally’s lips as she slid her arms around his neck. “I’ll give you that, I’d be lying saying otherwise.” Leaning closer, still staring into Sonic’s eyes, Sally craned her head to the side still leaning in. “I still think I don’t deserve you-.” “Sal-.” She put a finger to his lips. “However, I am very, very happy that you still love and want me even with all my flaws, and baggage.” “Like I’m not flawed-?” She interrupted him again, “Not finished, the bottom line is- oh screw it! I love you too, now kiss me!”’ Deciding words weren’t enough and anything else she said would be a mere retread of words already spoken. She removed her finger from his lips and closed the distance. Planting a big, ol’ wet, and hungry kiss against the Hedgehog’s lips. To which Sonic’s only response was to make a surprised if pleased sound and eagerly return the kiss. Each tightening their hold on the other as the sun fully began to set, and soon the sky lit up with fire-works from the celebration in the city. Almost as if to mirror the setting sun, giving way to the moon and the night; their kissing grew more passionate. Simple lip-to-lip meshing gave way to dueling tongues and their grip on each other began to pet and rub at the skin under their fur, as a heat grew between them.

Shrugging a shoulder, Sally let her vest start to fall off. Noticing this, Sonic started to grasp the article to help slide it back in place, but one of her hands grasped his wrist to stop him. “Don’t.” She pleaded, heat in her voice, her still tear-wet eyes opening to look into his. “I need you Sonic, I want to feel you all of you, kissing me, holding me, on me, in me…” Her soft words carried a mix of soft pleas from the inner turmoil she still felt; intermingled with a sensual huskiness that underlined her desire to be loved and make the pain go away.

Any argument about being out in the open, died without Sonic even uttering the thoughts. Certainly, the concern of being walked upon was there; as far from prying eyes as Freedom Fighter HQ was, they were sitting on top of the grassy hill on top of it. Anyone could wander by and get, well one hell of a show. 

Sally’s loving, needy gaze, and soft pleas killed any objections as Sonic, helped her remove the vest and their kissing resumed. It was probably in their favor that the fireworks show went on as long as it did, dulling out sounds, a pretty distraction and if both Sally and Sonic were, to be honest, ambiance to the oldest dance they were engaged in without a care in the world besides each other.

Robotnik couldn’t destroy them, and neither would Eggman, they would endure as long as they had each other.

[pcurrytravels]

Thoughts: New Orleans (Part VI)

Upon disembarking from the boat, we saw that the Audubon Aquarium was still open for another thirty minutes. Given that it was only around the corner from Spanish Plaza, we quickly walked over and, despite being repeatedly told we’d only have twenty minutes, just went on ahead and took a look around…………only to leave fifteen minutes later. Having been to the Shedd Aquarium in Chicago and the Aquarium of The Bay in San Francisco, maybe I just wasn’t judging it fairly. Or maybe I was, because those two blow this one out of the water (pun not intended……but it’s still pretty funny that I used this phrase to describe an aquarium of all things).

One thing the Audubon Aquarium has going for it is being themed around aquatic life in The Americas. There were sections dedicated to nautical life in and around the Caribbean, the Amazon, the Arctic, the Great Lakes and of course, the Mississippi. That’s also where things stop being interesting pretty much. It’s very small, which is odd because the building looks so large from the outside, and the only exhibits that really caught my eye were the piranhas, the catfish (mostly because I’ve never seen live catfish before) and the albino gator. I’d honestly suggest skipping this one entirely, unless you’ve never been to an aquarium before.

Anyway, my phone was dying, and I was musty anyway, so we went back to the hotel room to recuperate. I took a shower, charged my phone and relaxed for about an hour before heading back to the French Quarter. There were about two hours before the Haunted History tour began, so I grabbed some more beignets from Café Beignet as a snack before we hung out on Bourbon again for a little bit.

Even though the history, culture and food were all a higher priority for me than nightlife, I do regret not really taking part in New Orleans nightlife. On Bourbon alone, there’s just so much variety in the nightlife. There’s many different options available, from jam-packed party bars no larger than a booth (see: Lafitte’s Blacksmith Shop), to bawdy strip clubs (see: Rick’s Cabaret and Hustler Hollywood), to classy, historical cocktail lounges (see: Old Absinthe House), to tacky, touristy daiquiri shops (see: Tropical Isle and Cat’s Meow) to small live music clubs (see: Bourbon Heat and Funky Pirate), there really is something for everyone there (compare this to The Strip in Vegas where you’ll be treated to an endless amount of mega-clubs, poolside day-clubs and “ultra” lounges that all require one of your limbs to get in, all charge a kidney for drinks, all have disturbingly similar décor and all play the same music). And that’s just Bourbon. I saw a number of venues that caught my interest in not only the rest of the Quarter, but Marigny, CBD, the Warehouse District and the Garden District as well.

I was honestly having a blast just walking down the street and looking in the window of the various bars and lounges; it was only 6 P.M., and they were all already in full swing. I heard so many styles of music. Jazz (be it Brass, Dixie, BeBop or Smooth), R&B, Funk, Bounce, EDM, Blues, Zydeco, Hip Hop, 70s and 80s throwbacks, Top 40, Rock, Ska, Caribbean, Latino…..you name it, they got it. Of course that’s to say nothing of the BEAUTIFUL happy hours and drink specials all over the place. I learned my lesson about having a few drinks before walking around in the heat the hard way on the Cemetery tour, so I refrained from taking part this time, but boy oh boy was I tempted. Let the good times roll/Laissez les bon temps rouler indeed!

Okay, let me take a look at my smartphone watch again. Oh, it’s 7:30 already!? Well then, let’s head on down to Reverend Zombie’s Voodoo Shop for the Haunted History Tour!

There’s a number of ghost tours in New Orleans, all of which varying in quality (based on what I’ve been told anyway), but I could already tell we had picked one of the better ones. Both the shop and the sidewalk in front were overflowing with people. There was a long line, which would be broken up into groups of twenty or so for each tour guide. The sun was setting on the Quarter, and with Sarabelle as our guide, we were off.

Our first stop was in Pere Antoine Alley. It was here where our guide gave us the rundown on investigating ghosts and the supernatural, complete with plenty of witty banter. Yes, Sarabelle was VERY funny, and the humor was a nice touch indeed, even though it didn’t really help make the stories any less horrific.

Moving on, Pere Antoine Alley is along the side of the St. Louis Cathedral; so-named as a dedication to Antonio de Sedella, a beloved Capuchin friar who served as parish priest from 1805 until his death in 1829. Now, local lore states that said alley is haunted by a friar, but whether it’s Pere Antoine or someone else is up for debate. Said alley was also the location of a funeral procession for the six, executed leaders (whose corpses were left to rot in front of the St. Louis Cathedral for WEEKS, mind you) of the brief rebellion which took place against the Spanish Inquisition, wherein another friar known as Pere Dagobert loudly sang the Kyrie. It’s been said that during the early-morning hours, or whenever it’s raining, you can hear the sound of the Kyrie, sometimes accompanied by the sight of a Capuchin monk in this very alley.

From there, we walked down Chartres to Hotel Provincial. Old-timey, quaint, elegant and VERY haunted. What’s the story behind this one, you ask? Apparently, a portion of it served as a military hospital during the Civil War………yeah. I’m pretty sure we all know that war-related injuries tend to be the sort that require surgery and sometimes even amputation. I also don’t think I need to explain the horrors of surgery and amputation in the 1800’s. Basically, anyone who knows the backstory of this place and chooses to stay there on purpose is crazy.

This site in particular is very susceptible to a paranormal phenomenon known as time-warping (I personally think the FQ as a whole has a predisposition towards that actually, but more on that later). Our guide alerted us to a number of reported instances where guests took the elevator, only for the doors to open to the sight of an 1860’s era hospital. People have also reported seeing confederate soldiers writhing in pain on the floor, mysterious blood stains on towels and bedding and even women in mid-1800’s clothing standing on the balconies, likely apparitions of the soldier’s widows.

I feel that I had an experience of my own just walking past; see that photo above? Yeah, I was standing perfectly still for it, and it still came out blurry AF. I took about ten photos of this place and ALL of them came out like that. Maybe my phone’s camera was just acting up. But then again, the lens of a camera is much more infallible than the eyes of a human. Also, while I am very much a believer, mind you, I think I need to give the skeptical part of my brain a bit of thanks. After all, our next stop of the tour was Louisiana’s very own gate to hell the infamous mansion on the corner of Royal and Gov. Nicholls. Widely referred to by locals as merely “The Haunted House,” this was once the home of a demon in the shape of a woman known as Delphine LaLaurie.

Another character you all may know from American Horror Story: Coven; like Marie Laveau, many liberties were taken with her story (the scenes filmed in or around her “house” actually made use of the Hermann-Grima House……..not that I blame them one bit for not using the real thing). That being said, in regards to her story and what really happened, it’s actually pretty difficult to tell where the legitimate facts stop and the sensationalized scandal begins as it is.

As you can see, I did provide a link to a video that gives a basic rundown of what happened, but truthfully speaking that’s one of about twenty different versions of the story I’ve heard over the years. Long story short, she was a local celebrity who threw lavish parties in a big gray house on Royal Street during the 1830’s. Suddenly, a fire broke out in 1834 and it’s revealed that she’s a madwoman engaging in extreme mistreatment of her slaves. The whole town is outraged (yes, you read that right, Delphine was regarded as a special kind of evil even by the standards of antebellum-era Louisiana) and she skips town in the dead of night as a result. Shortly after she left, neighbors began to report hearing screams and cries from the empty house at night; claims which still persist to this day.

The news reports from the era which regard said event are in one of two categories: a highly scandalized and exploitative version of events as seen in the New Orleans Bee, or a brief rundown that gives very little detail as seen in the Times-Picayune. In each version of the story I’ve seen and/or heard, the only details that remain consistent are a young slave girl jumping to her death after LaLaurie chased her around with a whip for brushing her hair too hard, the house fire, said fire being started by a slave who was chained to the stove, a horrific sight in some room on an upper floor, and the LaLauries fleeing shortly afterward. Beyond that, the details widely vary.

In our tour guide’s version of the tale, we were told that the slaves were never seen at the parties, which contradicts what I read previously about how each party seemed to have a different set of slaves; each individual slave rarely ever being seen more than once. And that’s only one of many discrepancies. Honestly, this is a story that was highly sensationalized from the get-go, and it’s only gotten even more exaggerated and over the top over the years, so you can’t get mad about it when the actual truth of what happened has simply been lost to time.

After the events of 1834, Madame LaLaurie was never seen or heard from again. General consensus is that she fled to Paris, but it’s been speculated she may have been hiding out in either Mobile, Alabama or some town across Pontchartrain like Slidell or Covington under an assumed identity. There’s even evidence which suggests she may have discretely returned to New Orleans at some point, if the nameplate and possible burial vault in St. Louis No. 1 says anything. After all, she really did love her house.

Over the years, the house has been used for many different purposes. At first, it went through a revolving door of owners, none of which staying for more than a few months. There was one man who mysteriously turned up dead in the house actually. In the 1870’s, it served as a segregated school for black girls (…….I would say something witty here if I wasn’t rendered speechless), only to shut down a year later thanks to numerous girls complaining about getting scratched and bruised by “that woman.” After that it’s been the location of a number of establishments, most notably a music conservatory, a furniture store and a saloon; all of which quickly failed (gee, I wonder why). In the 1890’s, most of the mansion was converted into apartments; first as low-income tenement units, largely occupied by Italian immigrants and briefly a homeless shelter before becoming luxury apartments in the 1950’s, although the first floor would still be occupied by a revolving door of businesses until the late 20th-century when it was reconverted to a mansion. The revolving door of owners persisted; Nicolas Cage bought the home and started living there in 2007……shortly before his career tanked and he went bankrupt, leading to foreclosure in 2009. Just a coincidence? Could be……but it’s not like this house has had a good track record with any of its tenants over the last 180 years.

These days, it’s owned by an oil tycoon from Texas who hires interior decorators and caretakers to furnish and maintain the house but otherwise does nothing with it. Basically, the “Haunted House” just stands there looking pretty (in the eeriest way possible) and that’s it. Then again, what with past business tenants and residents reporting apparitions of naked men in chains and frightened children pleading for help, a dubious black liquid oozing out of the walls and even the vengeful spirit of Madame LaLaurie herself roaming around, would you want to stay there? Let alone enter?

I tried to take a few pictures but night had fallen, and they all came out way too dark to see anything. As did most of the pictures I had taken after this point ( although I did catch some strange, green and/or blue colored mist within said darkness in a few of them......makes you wonder). In terms of lighting, aside from Bourbon Street and the vicinity of Jackson Square and the French Market, the French Quarter is VERY dark at night. It really did feel like I had stepped back into the 1800’s, and was also why I abstained from going there at night for most of my trip. Not trying to get drunk down there alone, lest I either get mugged or unsuspectingly walk into a time warp of my own.

Whilst spooked by the darkened Quarter, we came upon an unassuming Creole townhouse at 823 Orleans, one of many homes in the area fronted by a gallery held up with poles that are adorned with decorative, protruding trimming of sorts, named “Romeo spikes” in the local lingo. However, they’re anything but romantic; there’s a very gruesome story behind how they got that name, and this property is where it took place.

The story goes that one night, the man who owned this house wanted to take his family to dinner, but his daughter claimed to not be feeling well, so she stayed home while he and his wife went about their way. Upon arriving at the restaurant, he realized he forgot his wallet and quickly went home to retrieve it, only to find his daughter in bed with her boyfriend. Startled, the boyfriend quickly ran out and jumped over the balcony……..only to get stabbed in the hip by one of the spikes. Not able to support his weight, the spike ripped through the entire side of his abdomen, pulling out his intestines in the process, before he fell to this death. It’s alleged that sometimes a shadowy figure can be seen dangling off this gallery from afar, only to vanish if one takes a closer look.

After that, we took a little break. I talked with Sarabelle for a little bit, particularly asking about the Gardette-LaPrete House, only to learn that the tale of a sultan and his harem moving in, only for them to get massacred a few weeks later, is totally fictional (sad face). There’s no news reports of such a thing happening nor is there any record of a sultan ever living at the property. Even then, I still have to ask how such a story came about in the first place. I doubt such a tale would just sprout out of thin air, but moving on, during the break I walked over a block to Bourbon only to see a rowdy second-line in front of Laffite’s Blacksmith Shop.

While tapping my toes to the second line, I peered inside Laffite’s Blacksmith Shop for a moment. Built in the 1770’s, and one of the few structures in the Quarter that survived the 1788 fire, it was originally a blacksmith shop (obviously) that also doubled as a base of operations of the pirate Jean Laffite for a time. Currently a bar, evoking an old-timey feel, it’s lit only by candles, and is also very haunted. Granted, it’s utterly packed with people so not a good location for investigating, but it has long been claimed that the spirit of Jean Laffite himself can be seen blending in with the crowd, only to disappear when spotted; in addition to being the hiding place of a demon who wanders around with disembodied red eyes.  

After our little break, we then headed over to the Voodoo Spiritual Temple on 826 Rampart. In a bit of more recent history, we learned about the couple who resided in the upstairs apartment ten years ago, Zack and Addie. They first garnered attention during Hurricane Katrina, being two of a handful of people in the French Quarter who didn’t evacuate. They’d assist in cleanup efforts, would provide food and other necessities to those in need and helped prevent the various businesses in the area from being looted.

As soon as things went back to normal in New Orleans, things immediately went downhill for the couple. They’d regularly binge on drugs and alcohol, going on to argue and fight as a result. This all persisted for a year until one night where Zack committed suicide by jumping off the roof of the Omni Royal hotel. In his pocket, a note was found that pleaded with the authorities to go back to his apartment and check on his girlfriend (***WARNING*** very graphic details ahead).

And that they did, they entered the apartment, only to find that no one was there………until they checked the kitchen. Inside the oven, they found arms and legs. The pot on the stove contained a human head. Inside the fridge was a large bag containing a torso. Zack had killed, dismembered and attempted to cook Addie. Although cannibalism was widely speculated, a suicide note found in the apartment suggests that Zack was trying to think of a way to dispose of her body and turned to cooking it as a last resort.

The apartment has remained unoccupied ever since, although it is available to rent, and the resident priestess of the Voodoo temple downstairs does offer tours. Apparently, no one’s even bothered to change the stove and the refrigerator ever since that grisly incident took place (…….*shudder*). It’s theorized that a sort of demonic entity has long lurked the premises, and said being is what ultimately drove Zack mad. Even I couldn’t shake the feeling of something with evil intentions staring at me from the darkened windows of the upper floor apartment.

Next, we were taken to a gallery that has paintings of a blue dog on display. Although the artist claims that they were painted as a tribute to his dead dog, it’s widely believed to be a depiction of a creature from Cajun and/or rural Louisianan folklore known as the Rougarou. Like a cross between a werewolf and a wendigo, it is a beast that wanders the swamps and the bayous, and if bitten, you will become one yourself. Granted, there’s no real haunting (or even much fact) behind this one, it’s likely just a story Cajun elders told children so they’d behave, but it was still neat to learn about either way.

Our tour concluded in the alley on the other side of St. Louis Cathedral, known as Pirates Alley. One of many alleged hangouts of Jean Laffite, it’s said that his ghost wanders this location as well. With the lighting on the Jesus statue in the cathedral’s courtyard casting an ominous shadow on the backside of the building, it was here where Sarabelle bid us adieu. From there, well, we were hungry, so we made our way over to Café Maspero.

Café Maspero was delicious, if not necessarily mind-blowing. I had appetizer-size bowls of both gumbo and jambalaya, and it did feel good to finally try these two dishes I have long been fond of in their place of birth. My mom ordered a muffaletta. I had a bite and I honestly just thought it was too much going on, but she liked it. Once we were finished and I washed it all down with my Voodoo Doll daiquiri, we then made our way back to the hotel to rest up for our last day in New Orleans. And I honestly didn’t want to leave.