#And you're happy with that cause some things shouldn't mix

[phoward89]

Banner by me. Dividers by @saradika

Summary: You're the winner of the First Quarter Quell and you awaken in the hospital to Head Gamemaker Coriolanus Snow at your bedside.

Pairing: Coriolanus Snow x Reader (Y/N)

Warnings: Coriolanus Snow is his own warning! Possessive!Coriolanus, Obsessive!Coriolanus, DelusionalCoriolanus, Dark!Coriolanus, Soft Dark!Coriolanus?, Head Gamemaker!Coriolanus, Mentions of death, Mentions of planning murder, Mentions of cheating/infidelity (not on reader), Mentions of poison, Large age gap/difference (Coriolanus is 33 while reader is 18), Manipulation, um...trying to think of anything else.

Story Masterlist

Chapter 1:

When the Head Gamemaker’s baritone blared out overhead, naming you the victor of the First Quarter Quell, you literally collapsed into a heap on the blood soaked ground from a mix of exhaustion and happiness. Your eyelids drooped and the last thing you saw before you passed out was a pair of peacekeepers coming towards you.

When you woke up, you were in a sterile white room. A hospital room. You had drips and IVs connected to you along with some monitor that made beeping noises. Blinking to readjust your eyes to the brightness of the artificial light, you surveyed the room only to notice that sitting in a chair right next to your bed was none other then the head gamemaker himself. Coriolanus Snow.

“What are you doing here, Head Gamemaker Snow?” You curiously asked. Surely he had better things to do then be at your bedside. Like being home with his wife. Oh and you knew he was married because 1.) He was wearing a gold band on his ring finger and 2.) You've seen a dirty blonde woman his age on his arm in a few pictures of Victor's balls and such in the cheap Capitol rag mags that get circulated around District 12 to be used as tp by the poor and destitute. 

Staring you down with his icy blue eyes, he said, “I'm making sure that District 12’s first victor in 15 years survives.”

His words made a shiver run up your spine. It was common knowledge that District 12’s first and only victor (until now) had mysteriously vanished into thin air a few months after winning her games and returning home. Nobody dared talk about her. Her name was lost to the wind; she was a ghost that nobody paid any mind too. The fact that the head gamemaker wanted to make sure that you didn't die unnerved you. 

Surely you weren't in that bad of shape, were you? Swallowing a lump in your dry throat, you croaked out, “How bad of shape am I in, Head Gamemaker Snow?”

“Please, darling, call me Coriolanus or Coryo, if you'd like.” The platinum blonde, who looked a bit sleep deprived in his wrinkled button up (as if he'd slept in it) told you. “I insist.” He smiled. 

Him calling you darling and insisting that you call him Coriolanus or Coryo made your insides churn. It wasn't right. Why would he be so informal with you. He was the head gamemaker, a 33-year-old man from the Capitol, and you were just a victor, an 18-year-old girl from District 12. You two shouldn't be informal with each other.

“Oh, where are my manners? You must be thirsty. Let me get you some water.” Corio- no Head Gamemaker Snow lightly chastised himself while rising from his chair.

Crossing the room to a counter where a tray with a pitcher and glass were, he explained, “When the peacekeepers pulled you out of the arena you had collapsed from dehydration.” Pouring you a glass of water, he further explained, “Your vitals were very low and, in fact, you died once on your way here, but the medics brought you back.”

“What the hell? I died?...” You gasped, struggling to comprehend what you just heard. 

Head Gamemaker Snow appeared by your side and placed the water glass into your hand. A hand much smaller and weaker than his large calloused one. “Yea, but you were revived.” Sitting on the edge of your bed, causing it to dip, he motioned for you to drink. “I must have my Victor alive and well, so that's why I've been keeping watch over you, Y/N.”

His words should've made you see a red flag waving in the air, but it didn't. Maybe you were too young and naive to catch onto the true meaning of his words. Maybe they went right over your head because you were still weak, or maybe since you had a stalker back in 12 that you had convinced yourself was just a weird neighbor boy you didn't realize the true possessive meaning of Coriolanus’ words.

“Are you going to stay here now that I'm awake or?...”

“Unfortunately, I have to leave you here and go home.” He pouted. What the hell, he actually pouted? You had to admit that his plush lips looked very kissable when he pouted. Petting your hair, he gave you a reassuring smile. “Don't worry, darling, I've made sure that you'll be well taken care of by the best nurses that money can buy in the Capitol.”

What he didn't tell you was that he threatened the lives of the nursing staff’s loved ones if you so much as had a hair out of place. That was something you didn't need to know. Just like you didn't need to know that when he first laid eyes on you, in your best cotton floral dress; your hair pulled back with a ribbon for Reaping Day, he found you the most beautiful creature he'd ever laid eyes on and just had to claim you as his. Reason why, as the head gamemaker, he might or might not have screwed around with other tributes’ sponsor gifts and made sure you got a few things here and there that would ensure your survival. You had an innocence to you that he had the primal urge to consume. An innocence that was absent in the Capitol. An innocence and a beauty that he carved to have all to himself.

You just being you consumed him with a passionate obsession. One that he would act on soon. Very, very soon. He just needed to take care of his wife, Livia, so that he'd be free to make you his forever. But that wouldn't be hard, considering he was a master at making people drop dead from sudden food poisoning. 

Pressing a kiss to your hair, Corio- no Head Gamemaker Snow, promised, “I'll be back in the morning to check up on you before I'm needed at the Citadel.”

“You have to wrap up the game stuff don't you, Head Gamemaker Snow?” You asked, even though you were sure he'd say yes. In fact you didn't even know why you asked that. Maybe as a replacement for goodbye since you hated that word. 

Last time you said goodbye to somebody it was your mother and she took off with some officer, leaving you with your older half-brother Rein to take care of you both. He was 15 at the time and you were 5. Safe to say, you never used the word goodbye again in your life. 

“I told you, call me Coriolanus or Coryo.” He reminded you, not liking that you were still calling him by his title. “Yes, my darling rose, I must make sure that all the paperwork is in proper order for your prize money and the construction of your house in Victor's Village.” The platinum blonde man, who you just noticed has bags under his eyes, tiredly told you before pressing another kiss to your hair. Tucking a strand of hair behind your ear, he said, “You need to be a good girl and rest for me.”

You blinked at him. What? Be a good girl? And rest for him? Say what? Your brain was short circuiting at his words. Not just his words, but the way his baritone was both dominant and soft as he spoke them.

Pressing a kiss to your forehead, he simply said, “We'll talk more tomorrow. I promise.”

“Okay.” You nodded numbly, unable to comprehend what the hell was happening. You went like your head was spinning, as if you had too much moonshine. Hell, what had your time in the arena done to you?

Coriolanus gave you a pleased smile before rising from his spot on your bed and walking out of your room; making sure to close the door behind him. It was only after he was gone that you realized you were in a private room.

Coriolanus was fucking exhausted when he got home. He could barely keep his eyes open as he stepped out of his black sedan. After you were admitted to the hospital, he dismissed his driver and drove himself there. He didn't want the man to be waiting around on him while he stayed steadfast at your bedside, plus he was more than capable of driving himself home once he saw you open your beautiful eyes. What he wasn't expecting was for you to be asleep for over 24-hours. 

So, sleep deprived, Coriolanus walked into the townhouse he shared with his wife, Livia. The townhouse was a gift he received from Strabo and Ma Plinth once he announced his engagement, but he planned on putting it up on the market once he took care of Livia. He didn't want to bring you to this house that held nothing but hatred and misery in it.

No, he was going to bring you to his penthouse on the Corso. Now that's a proper place for you to live with him. In fact, he'd be telling you about your new residence tomorrow morning during your visit. Oh, he was so excited to tell you that you'd be staying in the Capitol with him. Of course, he'd use the excuse that since District 12 doesn't have a Victor’s Village and it must be constructed that he's arranged for you to use his Corso penthouse during the construction period.

It was a great plan. One that was foolproof. He just knew that you, being so young and innocent, would view his offer as one of help instead of one of ownership. Or, dare he say, love? Yes, love. He was sure that he was obsessively in love with you. It was a feeling he swore to never feel again, but yet again one just can't help who they fall in love with.

He always thought that marrying for hate instead of love or even tolerability would give him power, but truthfully all it gave him was a headache and a bad case of blueballs. Livia was a heinous bitch and was a cold fish in bed. She didn't like to fuck. What the fuck? Who doesn't like to fuck? Coriolanus thought that was absurd, unnatural even.

That's why he had to have affairs here and there; then turn the whores into avoxes to keep their mouths shut when he was done with them. What? He was a man after all and had needs. Needs that he knew you'd fulfill without any problems. With you he'd be faithful because you'd be his mind, body, and soul and would do anything for his love since you were so young. All he had to do was show you how in love *cough* obsessed *cough* he was with you and you'd be his forever.

Unknown to Coriolanus, the object of his marital hatred (Livia) was having an ongoing affair with one of the male avoxes in their household. An avox that had once been an equal of theirs in the Academy and the University, but crossed Snow the wrong way with a question about the songbird from 12. 

Coriolanus wasn't even to the stairs yet when he heard Livia’s screeching coming from the front sitting room. Great…seems like the bitch was waiting up for him. 

“Coriolanus, where have you been? The games ended and you never came home!” Livia demanded in a high pitch scream as her fuzzy heeled skippers clicked loudly against the hardwood floor as she ran out of the sitting room and into the main hall.

“Don't worry about where I was, Livia.” Coriolanus venomously gritted out as he made his way to the staircase.

“You're my husband, Coriolanus. I'm supposed to worry about where you've been.” Livia shrieked while following her husband. 

“I'm your husband when I don't come home, but when I'm home we have separate bedrooms and you come up with every excuse under the sun not to fuck me.” Coriolanus spat back as he tiredly trudged upstairs, feeling a migraine coming on from his wife's nagging. Oh, how he needed to poison that bitch yesterday.

“Your tastes in bed are not the same as mine, husband.” Livia said, placing special emphasis on the word husband, while following him upstairs. “You're too harsh for my taste, but that doesn't mean you can stay out for days on end with some whore.” 

All Coriolanus could see was red, like a raging bull, after hearing her remark. How dare she insult his prowess in bed? He knew how to fuck a woman and how to fuck her good; he never had any complaints either until he tied the knot with Livia. Damn bitch, won't fuck him and then insults his ability to fuck. Oh, yes, it was time for her to go. 

She outlived her usefulness. Livia couldn't give him the one thing he most desperately needed. An heir. What use did Coriolanus have for a woman that refuses to have his child? After a decade of hell with his wife, he was ready to cut his losses. He had control of her family's bank and the Plinths fortune, plus his status as Head Gamemaker and Senator along with his position on the War Council was more then enough to make him a successful candidate for president once the elder President Ravenstill kicked the bucket. He didn't need her for an heir anymore, not when he had you (you were young and fertile enough to give him litters of heirs).

Oh, Coriolanus knew exactly how to make up for never coming home after the games ended with Livia. Oh, yes, he did. 

“The victor, Y/N, from 12 was in bad shape and I had extra paperwork to do.” He smoothly lied to his dirty blonde wife as he set foot onto the second floor of his townhouse. Turning to look at her, he gave her a fake smile full of fake sympathy and offered, “How about I take you out to your favorite restaurant for dinner? The one that has that red wine you can't get enough of.”

“Yes, I accept your apology and dinner invitation. Just don't do this to me again, Coriolanus. We might hate each other, but I'm still your wife and deserve respect.” Livia told Coriolanus before taking off to her room, her robe billowing behind her.

Coriolanus smiled wickedly as he retired to his room. Oh, after tomorrow night he'd never have to deal with Livia ever again. He'd be free to have you all to himself, forever and always.

You were walking in the plains, tall prairie grass blowing in the wind. The deeper you walked in it, the more dread you felt. You couldn't describe the feeling, but you just knew that something was wrong. Then, suddenly, you heard a crunching sound behind you. Turning around, you saw the last tribute, a girl from 2, with a knife in her hand running towards you. 

You were exhausted and thirsty. The water you had been gifted from a sponsor had run out nearly a day ago, so you were feeling the effects of dehydration. You didn't know if you either didn't have a lot of sponsors or weren't getting any more water bottles because a water source was nearby somewhere, but you did know that it sucked you were dying of thirst.

But your thirst didn't matter now. Surviving the girl from District 2 did and you knew you wouldn't be able to fight her in the tall grasses. So you ran. You ran as hard and fast as your lightheaded feet would carry you.

It didn't take long until you were out of the tall grasses and on a barren field of cracked soil. You had a small pocket knife that was gifted to you, something you were sure cost a hefty penny since sponsor weapons were always pricey according to Lucky Flickerman’s game commentary.

Flipping the switchblade open, you turned around and headed straight towards the girl that had tripped and fell at the edge of the plains grasses and the dry bed of field soil. Lifting up your knife, you made to plunge it into her, only for her to look up at you with a sinister smirk and plunge her knife right into your neck.

Your eyes flew open as you screamed bloody murder. You died! You had died in your nightmare instead of being victorious. That nightmare shook you to your core. It frightened you so much that you screamed yourself hoarse, until your vocal cords were stripped. You were so frightened that you huddled in the corner of your room in a fetal position.

Nurses and other hospital staff tried to tend to you; get you out of the corner, but you just struggled and fought with them. You couldn't let them near you. What if they wanted to kill you? What if they hurt you? Your dream had shaken you up so bad that you weren't quite with it yet. You weren't in reality, you were stuck in your own head and afraid that somebody or something was going to get you. You were scared out of your wits. You were so scared that you cried. You weren't aware that you were crying, but the tear stains marred your hollowed cheeks like scars.

Coriolanus had only been asleep for an hour or so whenever he was awakened by a call from Capitol General Hospital. What the charge nurse told him made his heart clutch painfully. His victor, his darling rose, woke up terrified out of her mind and curled herself into a corner, screaming and crying her head off.

“She's having a nightmare about her time in the arena. Aren't you giving her anything to calm her down?” Coriolanus asked the nurse  he was on the phone with as he sat up in bed, flipping on his bedside lamp to softly illuminate his pitch black room in a golden glow of light.

“She won't let anyone near her and you did say to call you with any updates on her condition, sir “ The nurse hesitantly told him.

“I’ll be right there to sign her out since your hospital staff are incompetent and can't properly take care of a victor.” He told the nurse before hanging up on her.

It only took a few minutes for Coriolanus to dress and rush to the hospital. Despite being exhausted, you needed him and he wasn't going to let you down. You were his and he was going to take good care of you. He always took good care of his things. He did like his things to be perfect and if they weren't then he'd make sure that his favorite things were mended until they were perfect. You were his and he'd make sure that he made you perfect once more. Perfect for him, to be by his side as not just his Victor, but as his First Lady. His darling rose.

Dressed simply in a fitted white shirt and black pants, Coriolanus ran up the stairs to your floor and rushed into your room. The site of you curled up, tear tracks staining your cheeks, wide-eyed and afraid pulled at what little heartstrings were in his too small blackened heart. You looked like a wounded animal and he hates it. You were his victor, his darling rose, his future First Lady and he wanted you to recover your senses so that you could regain your strength; be all that he knew you were to him.

He slowly approached you with his hands out in a show of peace. “It's me, my darling rose. It's Coryo.” Coriolanus softy told you in an attempt to let him near you.

Your eyes blinked at hearing his nickname and for some reason you nodded at him. As he crouched down next to you, placing a tentative hand on your shoulder, you clutched the middle of his pristine white shit and sobbed, “I died, Coryo. I dreamed that I died instead of her.”

Your words gutted him. A world without you was no world at all. Wrapping his arms around you: letting you bury your head in his chest, he strokes your hair while offering you the comforting words of, “Oh, my darling, you're alive. You're alive and I won't let anything bad ever happen to you again, Y/N.” You shook in his arms, causing him to simply ask, “You hear me, my darling rose?”

“Mhm…” You mumbled out, too afraid to talk for fear that you'd start crying again. 

“Shh…” Coriolanus shushed you like one would do a small, frightened child. “I'm here. Your Coryo’s here and you're safe. You'll always be safe with me, darling.”

If you were of sound mind instead of scared out of it (from the horrors he designed and put into the damn games) you would've ran far far away from Coriolanus. But, sadly, you were too scared and on the verge of a mental breakdown to understand how twisted the man holding you really was. How obsessessive he was; how wrong letting him hold you was. No, you were too afraid to realize that you were letting the creator of your nightmares comfort you.

Once your sobs subsided and you quieted down, Coriolanus pulled back from you so that he could tilt your chin up in order to have your eyes on his. “I was going to wait til morning to tell you this, but you’ll be staying in a luxurious penthouse while the Victor’s Village is constructed in your district.”

You nodded, only to squeakily ask, “How long am I staying here?”

“Oh, just long enough to build your victor's house. I suppose it'll be done by time your victory tour rolls around; maybe even sooner.” He smoothly lied. He had no intentions whatsoever to let you go back to District 12. You deserved more then the mud and poverty stained streets of the coal district. You deserved to be bathed in rose scented oils and salts, dressed in the finest fashions, fed the best foods, and fucked on the best silk sheets that his money could buy. 

“Okay.” You nodded, naively believing the lies of the head gamemaker. 

“How about we get you out of here and over to the penthouse? Hmm? I'll even call Tigris to come over and spend the day with you, how'd you like that?”

“I like Tigris. She’s nice and was my stylist. Always talked to me like she cared.”

Coriolanus knew that his cousin was your stylist. He's the one that assigned her to you after all. But neither you nor her needed to know that. No…. It wasn't important. What was important was that you two got along, especially since in a short while you'll be family.

“Tigris is my cousin; I'm glad to hear that you like her.” Coriolanus told you while helping you to stand up. “And she does care about you, Y/N.” He told you while leading you over to your bed. “Never forget that the Snows care about you. And that snow lands on top.” He whispered into your ear while helping you sit on your bed. 

You just blinked at him, trying to process what he meant. You were so tired and mentally weak from your nightmare that you had no idea that his remark was one of possession. Your throat hurts from all the crying and screaming that you did, so you weren't thinking straight. Infact, your throat hurts so much that you grab the glass of water from your bedside table, quickly gulping it down.

“Be careful, you don't want to make yourself sick.” Coriolanus warned, much like a parent would to a child, while snatching the glass away from you.

“My throat’s dry and hurts. I need water.” You said in a pained whisper, side eying the glass in Coriolanus’ hand.

“Yes, well, that tends to happen when you scream and cry yourself hoarse.” He stated a bit coldly before lifting the glass to your lips and ordering, “Be a good girl and take small sips for me.”

You obeyed since your throat was aching. The small sips of the cool water seemed to soothe your damaged throat just enough to keep your mind off the pain. When Coriolanus felt you had enough to drink, he put the glass down on your side table. 

Petting your hair, he said, “I need to go sign you out at the front desk, but I'll be back soon to take you with me to the penthouse. Where you'll be safe.”

“Thank you.” You weakly smiled at the man that was now both your salvation and your damnation.

If only you knew what life awaited for you at that penthouse. Would you still be thanking him if you did?

Tags: @kuroosbby001, @purriteen, @poppyflower-22, @meetmeatyourworst, @whipwhoops,

@bxtchopolis, @readingthingsonhere,

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[deliciousangelfestival]

Nothing Has Changed - 2

Summary: Returning home for peace, you're faced with your tormentor, Bucky Barnes, who is now involved in your family's business.

Character: Bucky Barnes x Female!Reader

Words Count: 2,143

Warning: Angst, Tragedy.

Nothing Has Changed - Series Masterlist

Main Masterlist || support: Ko-fi

Thank you to anyone who gave a like, reblog, and left a comment. It motivated me to write more. 

The one person who turned your school life into a nightmare will take over your father's business.

You never had any interest in following in your father's footsteps. Tom had told you from the beginning that you weren't fit for this work. And you hated the business; you wanted to burn it to the ground.

Even though you had never come home for several years, you kept sending your father monthly money. That money was enough for him to move and buy a new house in a big city. Last Christmas, you called your father and told him to sell the house, but he said nothing.

Something never changed: your father would put work before his own happiness.

Now you know why he didn’t want to sell the house. Because he had found someone to continue the business. Bucky Barnes.

Bucky is the popular kid from the wealthiest family in town. Everywhere he went, people followed him. His entourage echoed his every move.

When Bucky said something about you, his followers echoed his sentiments. If Bucky said A, his entourage would cover B to Z, and he never stopped them.

You once thought that he looked down on you because he was rich. But after moving to the city with Ransom and meeting many influential and wealthy people in the business world, you realize that Barnes' fortune was nothing compared to the 0.1%.

Now, you see him as just a regular person.

You sighed, feeling a mix of frustration and resignation. "This is a big mistake. I shouldn't have come back here." You walked past them, not even glancing in Bucky's direction, and headed upstairs to grab your things.

Tom followed after you. “Y/N, please, we can talk about this. I didn’t know how to tell you.” He knew he had been an absent father. After you left for college, your relationship worsened.

You only called him on holiday, and he was afraid to call you first. He didn't know how to start the conversation when he had the chance to talk.

You stayed silent, slinging your bag over your shoulder and holding your laptop.

“Where are you going to stay?” Tom asked, desperation in his voice. “From what you told me, you don’t have much cash.”

He was right. Your bank account was blocked. But you still had some cash and your Rolex, which you could pawn. You glanced at your watch as you headed down the stairs.

Distracted, you missed the last step and started to fall. “Ahh!”

You braced for the impact, but instead, you hit something solid.

“Did you hurt your foot?” Bucky asked, holding you steady. His voice was worried. He had been about to leave, not wanting to cause more conflict between you and your father.

You looked at his face, searching for the smug expression he always wore when he tormented you with his “silly pranks.”

Quickly, you pulled away from his grasp. You didn’t want to be near or share the same air with him.

You walked past him, treating him like he didn’t exist. Before opening the door, you grabbed an umbrella—a habit of always being prepared.

As you opened the door, you felt a hand on your shoulder. You rolled your eyes, turned around, and saw Bucky stopping you.

“Please, listen to your father first,” Bucky said softly, sounding anxious. Your father stood at the top of the stairs, speechless.

At this moment, you felt like an outsider. They seemed more like father and son than you and Tom ever had.

You pushed Bucky's hand off your shoulder. "Keep your hands off of me!" Your voice was filled with years of pent-up anger and pain, each word like a knife stabbing into Bucky.

You slammed the door and stormed off, your heart pounding with a mix of rage and betrayal.

Back at the house, Bucky and Tom stood staring at the closed door.

Tom sighed, his shoulders sagging. "Give her a moment. She's been through a lot."

Bucky, still shaken, asked softly, "What happened to her?"

⌚

At the pawn shop, you tapped your fingers anxiously on the glass counter, awaiting Mr. Rogers' appraisal of your Rolex watch. His gaze met yours, and he inquired, "Do you know how much it's worth?"

You nodded, a sense of unease creeping over you. "I bought it three years ago for around $25,000. With the current market price, and since I didn’t bring the box and certificate, the price will be lower. I would say it’s around $8,000."

Mr. Rogers's eyes widened in surprise at your precise evaluation. Clearing his throat, he mumbled, "Ahem, you're right. And because you’re Tom’s daughter, I will give you that price."

You quietly sighed. You had just arrived at one shop, and he already knew you. But what could you do? This was the only pawn shop open this morning.

"Wait a second, I'll grab the money for you," Mr. Rogers announced before disappearing into the back room.

Taking a seat, you fidgeted with your phone, searching for the nearest hotel or motel.

Just as you began to scroll, your phone rang. It was Maya, your lawyer. You had chosen to work with her because she was your assistant's friend. Money was tight, so you couldn't afford a well-known lawyer.

“Hello?” you answered the call.

“Hi, are you alright? You have arrived in your hometown?” Maya asked.

“Yes, I have. By the way, is there any progress?” you inquired.

“Yes. They already looked through it. I guess you could hear good news in 3 days,” Maya replied.

You sighed in relief. “I’m glad. Thank you.”

After a brief conversation with Maya, you ended the call. Then you heard someone clear their throat.

“Ahem.”

You glanced up to see that the person behind the counter was no longer Mr. Rogers but his son, Steve Rogers, who was also Bucky’s friend.

Back then, Steve didn’t say anything when you were made fun of. But he didn’t do anything to stop the silly pranks either. So his name was also written in your black book.

But now you weren’t the same person anymore. You were a 'female Midas'. You were supposed to be confident. Steve used to look at you as if you were invisible. Now you should do the same.

You got up from your seat and walked towards him. There was a stack of cash, probably $9,000, in front of you. Mr. Rogers was quite a generous man.

You picked up the money and stuffed it into your bag. It was enough to live here for 3 days before you went back to the city.

Steve noticed that you didn’t even look at him. He cleared his throat. “It’s been a while. Are you staying?”

You continued to ignore him. As you exited the door, you clapped your hands, making Steve jump. Then you muttered, “Oh, it’s just a fly,” as you walked away.

🏨

You left the pawn shop and glanced back at your phone to find a cheap hotel or motel nearby. As you walked, sweat poured down your back, making you feel uncomfortably sticky. It was the most strenuous workout you had in a while, just trying to find a place to rest.

Eventually, you stumbled upon an interesting hotel on the booking app. The hotel was located inside a big building that sold outdoor equipment. It was cheap and conveniently close to your location.

Sweat dripping down your forehead, you kept walking until you finally reached the building. You were impressed by the natural surroundings, with shops surrounded by nature. The building was named Bronze Adventure Gear.

Upon entering, you were greeted by an employee.

“Welcome to Bronze Adventure Gear. How can we help you?” they asked.

You were taken aback by their energy; it was still 10 a.m., and they were already bustling with customers.

“I’m here for the hotel,” you replied. “I know it’s early, but I just need a place to rest.”

“No worries. It’s off-season, and there are many empty rooms. We’ll guide you to the receptionist,” they said, leading you further into the building.

Grateful for the hospitality, you thanked them as they left you at the receptionist.

The hotel was called Bronze Lodge.

“We’ll leave you to our friend,” the employee said before departing.

“Thank you,” you replied, feeling a sense of relief wash over you as you tapped the reception table and waited.

“Welcome to the Bronze Lodge. How can I help you?” a friendly female voice greeted you. However, to your ears, it sounded like venom. It was Natasha Romanoff, the popular girl in town.

You felt a shiver run down your spine, a sensation far different from when you had encountered Bucky and Steve again.

“Y/N? Is that you?” Natasha's voice cut through the air.

You tried to compose yourself. “Yup.”

“Goodness. It’s been a long time. And you're so beautiful. Ah, where are my manners? Are you staying at this hotel?” Natasha wore her trademark smile—the same one you hated seeing back in school, where her girl gang would always talk behind your back.

"You know what-?" You were about to say, but then second thoughts about leaving crossed your mind.

That's when you heard the most enormous thunderclap of your life.

“Are you surprised? The weather is quite unpredictable,” Natasha remarked casually.

She glanced at your belongings. “Oh, and you brought your yellow umbrella. Such a nostalgic touch. You never changed,” she continued, her words like needles pricking at your skin.

You clenched your fists, your frustration bubbling up inside you.

“You’re lucky. There’s a room ready for you. Here’s the key. I hope you enjoy staying with us,” Natasha said, offering you the card key with a sweet smile.

You snatched the key from her hand. “I’ll try.”

Turning on your heel, you made your way to the elevator. As you left, Natasha's smile faltered, and she quickly grabbed her phone to make a call. “You won’t believe who checked into the hotel today,” she said eagerly.

*********

The moment you entered the hotel room, you threw yourself onto the bed, exhausted. You turned around and stared at the ceiling.

The rain and thunder outside seemed oblivious to your desire for peace. You starting to regret coming back here.

Closing your eyes, you tried to ease your racing mind. But four hours later, what was meant to be a short nap turned into a longer one.

'Knock. Knock.'

You were jolted awake by the sound of someone knocking at your door. Lazily, you left the bed and peered through the peephole, wondering who it could be since you hadn't requested anything.

You gasped when you saw Bucky standing outside. What on earth did he want? Wasn't it enough that you had already encountered him and his friends earlier today?

Taking a deep breath, you hesitated before opening the door.

When you did, you remained silent, not wanting to converse with him.

Bucky said, "Tom is looking for you."

"I see. Thanks for the info," you replied, moving to close the door, but he stopped it.

"What do you want?" you sighed in frustration.

"You have to talk to him," Bucky insisted.

Closing your eyes, you responded icily, "I'll talk to him when I'm ready. But I don't need you hovering around. I certainly don't want to see your face."

His expression seemed to reflect grief when you said that, though you dismissed it as your own emotions. Why would he feel guilty towards you?

"And how did you manage to find me?" you asked.

"It’s easy," Bucky replied nonchalantly, "since my family owns this business. I can access anything I want, including information about guests staying here."

There it was, the smug face finally making its appearance, accompanied by that cocky explanation.

You gritted your teeth. Somehow, the idea of being in prison didn't seem so bad anymore.

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[intimidating-fettuccine]

Hi! Can I request Masky with a gn! reader that is stronger than he expected? Like, maybe they’re training or even roughhousing and he expects them to fold easily, but next thing he knows he’s on the floor? 😂 I always find this kind of funny, but do you think you could also make it a little spicy? (Also, I did this literally exactly at 2 for me, it’s always difficult to remember where has what time frame y’know?)

I know you said Masky, but I did write for specifically Tim, because my Masky would not have enjoyed this situation.

Tim is a pretty hefty guy. He's decently tall, and he's been working on bodybuilding for years, so he's definitely not lacking in strength. That's why when the two of you started training together, he wasn't exactly worried about losing. He's confident in his abilities, and it's not that he thinks you're weak, but he wasn't really thinking that you'd be able to take him down easily. You've obviously got some power and strength to you too to be able to be one of Slender's employees, but Tim is one of the leaders for a reason because he's one of the strongest in the mansion and he knows how to lead and fight. 

At least, that's what he tells himself as he goes into your training session. You seem oddly relaxed as you stand across from him, and it sets Tim on edge a bit to see you so calm, but he shakes it off, thinking it must be his imagination. He knows you're strong, so he doesn't hold back when he starts launching attacks at you. While he's not intentionally trying to cause you severe harm, it's clear he's trying to test you and see just how much you can handle. Perhaps Tim should have realized that you'd be doing the same to him. You take his strikes efficiently, letting him think he's got the upper hand before you counter one of his hits particularly well. It catches him off guard, and makes him stumble back, but doesn't do too much overall, at least in his mind. Tim clears his throat nervously as he watches you roll your shoulders and crack your neck before you resume your fighting stance once more. He takes a deep breath and launches back to fight you again, but he shouldn't have been so careless. It doesn't take long this time before you've got the upper hand, having memorized all of his moves, and soon Tim is on his back staring up at the ceiling, a gasp shooting out of him as all his air leaves him.

You have him effectively pinned, even pressing your foot into his chest to hold him there, and Tim can only stare up at you in shock and awe as his heart races and thumps beneath your pressure. His face soon begins to flush red, even the tips of his ears staining with the blush taking over him. "What's the matter, cat got your tongue?" You smirk as you taunt him, and it causes him to grow even more flustered. He opens his mouth to respond to your taunt, but nothing comes out of his mouth as he stares up at you, clearly affected by the situation the two of you are in. When you smile at him, giggling at the situation as you go to help him up, he finds himself feeling vulnerable in a way he hasn't before, and he takes your hand tenderly as you pull him up. Level with you once more, he finds himself staring at you with mixed emotions, but one thing is for sure in his mind; you should do that again. The words slip past his mouth before he can stop them, and they catch you off guard, causing you to laugh again as they settle into your mind. You wrap your arms around his neck, pressing a kiss to his cheek as your body flushes against his. When you whisper into his ear that you'd be quite happy to his body trembles against yours, his hands moving to grip your hips before he can stop them. Tim tells himself he's going to have to train with you more frequently as he eagerly presses his lips against yours, his heart racing for another reason now.

[phoenixblaze1412]

HII!! happy new year!!! Can I get some fluff hcs with dottore (+ segments) and reader whos child is sucrose? This can be seen as a part 2 to the having a kid hcs if u want! - 🐓

It was you who gave your child the name Sucrose. Dottore didn't really mind any name you gave your offspring, his segments have weird names, why should he stop you from giving your child a chemical compound name?

Theta (Webttore) though... was curious of it.

"So.. why Sucrose exactly? Could have easily rhymed such a name with glucose, fructose or even lactose?"

"Because sucrose is sugar and what does sugar taste like? Sweet. And my daughter is the most sweetest thing in Teyvat."

"...both you and 'him' are bad at naming things. Naming your own kid table sugar, what a dumbass."

Sucrose prefers to stay with her father in his laboratory whenever you're busy, she's not much of an outdoor person and doesn't really want to interact with more people aside from you, Dottore, and even his segments who she can already tell who is who. She's just a shy little bean with good memorization.

Ever since the day Sucrose was born, everyone has been more restless, mostly you and Dottore since the segments don't even need sleep to energize themselves.

You would find her crawling around a room, searching for things that catches her interest and even reaching places a child shouldn't even reach.

One time when you, Dottore, and Sucrose were sleeping together on your shared bed, you were immediately woken up in the middle of the night due to the sound of your daughter crying but was nowhere to be found.

It took you and your husband at least 20 minutes to find that Sucrose was at the top of a cabinet and couldn't get back down.

Sucrose, your sweet daughter, apparently has taken in her father's footsteps, studying the world of science at just four years old. What got her interest the most is alchemy.

She immediately learned the chemical components of the things around her. Even creating and mixing a few chemicals into a test tube to see the reaction, Dottore stood beside her just in case something bad happens so he could pull his child out of the way.

One time when you were about to visit your family in the lab after coming home from a mission, you were immediately welcomed with a loud explosion which made you panic and run down to where it came from.

Once you reached the lab, you were greeted with your husband and child's faces all covered in soot. Both of their hair was messy and in every place, it was as if someone had electrocuted them which cause their hair to stand.

"What did you two do that caused this?"

"Welcome back, dearest. We wanted to see what kind of reaction we may get when we mix fuel oil with ammonium nitrate fertilizer."

"We got an explosion.."

Next time, before you went to another mission and leaving your two scientists behind, you asked the segments to keep an eye on the two and make sure they don't cause any more explosions.

Surprisingly, Sucrose has a few segments that she favored.

Omega and Prime, aside from being almost as perfect as her father, the two segments would teach her more about the chemistry field whenever Dottore is busy.

She finds Zeta's quiet behavior comfortable since she too is also shy and meek around others. They both communicate with a few sentences and it's already enough for them. Both Sucrose and Zeta rather prefers to do work than talk over it.

There were some fatui soldiers who would mistaken your child as a cicin mage due to her hair. Dottore suggested on dying her hair blue but you immediately declined his suggestion.

It's you who would be the one to style both Sucrose and Dottore's hair every morning, making sure it wouldn't hinder them whenever they work.

This caused the other segments to also want their hair get tied up, even those with hair as short like Theta's.

Dottore would always find ways to be able to spend time with you. Which is why he would hand his child over to his segments before sweeping you off your feet and carrying you out of the lab to spend quiet moments between you two.

All in all, Sucrose is happy to have her parents and guardians, if you could even call the segments as guardians. With her curious mind, she even learned about the other nations.

Oh, how cute Sucrose was when she asked her father if she could go to Mondstadt and study alchemy there.

"Absolutely not."

[yourantag]

Do NOT Let Him Cook (Morningstar!Ithaqua×Reader)

AN: Happy White Day! I'm probably not posting more than this and the other fic I was supposed to post Valentine's Day (which, as you can see, I failed in doing) for March. I will, however, be posting a little more in April cause that is my birthday month! Expect a few indulgent fics. This fic is honestly just crack, so if you need something silly and sweet, here we are! Genuinely, do not let this man cook. Word count: 2.2k words Summary: It's White Day, a day of reciprocated love. Of course, Helel has to give you something in return for your wonderful Valentine's gift. Now, if only he could figure out how he turned a tart into a fruity croissant...

There were very few things Helel feared. The first, of course, was you. He held your heart in his hands as you did too, yes, but no one could get him to obey them quite like you could. It was loyalty, it was devotion, one reciprocated through blood and love. To possess such power over him is somewhat of a marvel, something to fear, even just a little.

The second was your death, the thought of you leaving his side forever. He'd tear apart the world, commit sacrilege in the holiest places, and declare war upon the gods before he'd let someone take you from him. Still, he cannot control plagues, time, or the hostility within the hearts of humans. Life is delicate, even Helel cannot deny that.

The third thing he feared, Helel learned, was baking.

It seems simple enough, really. Chuck a few ingredients in, mix it, then toss it in an oven. Easy, right? Looking around him now, with smoke billowing off the charred tray (and wow, he didn't know metal could burn like that), Helel was completely at a loss.

"Ah, these don't seem quite right." He muttered, scratching his cheek. All Helel wanted was to give you something in return for your Valentine's gift, something special. He had consulted many people, even asking some of the prisoners, as odd as that sounded.

Most didn't give any good responses, only saying "please let me go" or "you're going to pay for this." Terrible advice, really. Not even on topic, either, but it could be worse, he supposed. So, he went to ask his favorite person to bother.

"For the love of- just make them cookies or something!" Nebuchadnezzar had exclaimed, absolutely done with Helel's ramblings. He looked about ready to chew his tongue off so he could finally know peace again. At least death wouldn't ramble about their lover for 15 hours straight.

It had been a decent suggestion, so Helel had taken it. Perhaps he shouldn't have, considering the disaster that was most of his creations.

The counters were covered in flour, the fine powder dusting the area like snow. Splatters of batter, egg, and butter painted some places like abstract art. The worst place of all, funnily enough, was the table. It was completely clean, presenting only a few delectable looking treats.

Sadly, they were not exactly what they were made to be. Somehow, Helel had managed to make bread instead of cake, a croissant instead of a tart, and now small bricks instead of cookies. He carefully tapped one against the counter, wincing as the wood chipped under the force. The cookie, however, was fine.

'I... can't give them this.'

Helel smiled awkwardly, wanting nothing but to slam his face against a wall. He had thought "it couldn't be that hard!" and look at him now. It was pathetic, to the point he genuinely considered just asking a servant to make something instead. However, that's literally something he could do any other day. It didn't carry the significance he'd want it to.

You had given him the head of the rebellion's leader, which most would find horrifying but he found terribly romantic. The best Valentine's gift, truly. Sure, he couldn't give you something of equal value, but he could try and match the sentiment. Helel knew you loved effort and thought, so he would do his best to give you something of that in equal measure.

So, he couldn't give up. Helel once again turned to a different page in the cook book, praying to himself that he didn't fuck up this time. He couldn't possibly mess up sugar cookies, right? They were simple, so surely no matter what they'd be fine.

He was cursing himself wasn't he?

He poured the ingredients, carefully measuring them as he went through the motions. It went smoother this time since he just made cookies (if he could really call them that). With practice under his belt, Helel managed to make a tray of cookies.

"Now I roll them in sugar before baking... where's the sugar?" He looked around, grabbing at the jars in front of him.

"That's flour... that's baking powder... or is it baking soda?... that's powdered milk... wait why do we have powdered milk? Oh!" Helel smiled as he finally found what he was looking for. He didn't know how the chefs managed to get anything done with nothing labeled, but that was the beauty of not being a chef. He didn't have to know, and perhaps he never would.

So, he popped open the glass jar, pouring in the crystalline fragments into a bowl. They glimmered innocently in the light, small gems that melted upon one's tongue.

Helel quickly tossed each cookie ball into the bowl, placing them back onto the tray afterward. Making sure they weren't too close together, he arranged them one last time. Finally, he placed them in the oven. The timer would let him know when they were ready.

The man sighed, moving quickly to wash the dirty dishes. He knew he could leave it to the servants, but at this point, he just wanted to get rid of the evidence of his failures. Sure, most of his baked treats looked... fine, but the first few looked as though it had gone through someone's digestive system already.

After all was said and done, Helel felt a wave of exhaustion wash over him. If this was what the chefs dealt with on the daily, he was going to have to give them a raise. All this for some desserts? Really? They deserved to be paid more for this misery.

Checking the timer, he nodded to himself. 10 minutes was enough time to snack on something. Helel let himself drop into a seat, groaning as his weary legs finally got to rest. He grabbed the cake-turned-bread, cutting off a small slice. The cookies were a definite no, and he had his suspicions about the croissant, but the bread seemed fine.

'If I get poisoned from this, they're never going to let me live it down.'

You would absolutely make fun of him. Morningstar, the King of Babel, dying from his own creation. It sounded like a story Shakespeare wrote, really. Helel hoped more for his pride rather than his life that he wasn't that bad at baking.

Taking a few bites, he found that he wasn't dying yet. Which was relieving, of course, but to his surprise, the bread also tasted not bad. Sweeter than most breads, but nothing unbearable. It was probably going to be one of the few things he could actually share with you.

At the chime of the timer, Helel took the cookies out of the oven, letting them cool. That would give him another few minutes to start packing things up. Should he use red ribbon or white? It's a White Day gift, yes, but you told him red reminded you of him.

Humming, the young king started slicing the bread, gently placing the slices in a nice container. Perhaps he should pack some jam in the basket too- it would go well with it.

Helel glanced at the first batch of cookies, opting to dump them in the trash after a brief moment of contemplation. Could they be used as projectiles? Honestly, yes. Was he going to let anyone know he failed that badly? Never.

Finally, he took a bite of one of the croissants. It was fine as well, just odd. The fruit fillings and cream were distributed well throughout the pastry. If it weren't for the fact that it was supposed to be a tart, Helel might have been proud.

Packing those up as well, he placed the 2 containers in a basket, grabbing a few jars of jam and a butter knife. By then, the cookies were sufficiently cooled. Though, after taking another look at them, Helel wondered what he had done wrong this time.

Unlike the first batch, these cookies were puffy. They weren't like cream puffs, but they were certainly not cookies. Had he mixed up which of the powders he was using? He really wouldn't be surprised if that were the case.

The other pastries he had packed weren't made to be what they ended up as, but tasted fine anyway. Maybe, these would be the same.

So, shrugging his shoulders, Helel tossed one of the "cookies" in his mouth. 

And instantly he regretted it.

It was salty. Not salty in the pleasantly seasoned way, but salty as in if he had drank salt water it would taste better than this.

Spitting out the abomination, Helel glared at one of the jars. Of course he mixed up the sugar and salt, of course. Still, he at least had something other than this. He'd just have to dispose of these.

If you didn't find him.

The door clicks open, and Helel can't decide whether he wants to scream or jump right out the window. In the doorway, as he expects, is you. You're always welcome in his eyes, his wonderful, perfect significant other. However, at this particular moment, he really wishes you weren't here.

"Helel? What are you doing here?"

Though you ask, you already seem to at least know he was baking. Not a very hard assumption to make, all things considered, but that just makes things harder for him.

"I was... baking." He says, giving a strained smile as he slowly grabs the tray of cookies. Hopefully, if he's quick enough, you won't even notice him toss the entire thing in the trash.

'Please do not ask about these, please don't notice-'

"Is that a scone dusted in salt???" 

Helel was going to throw himself off a cliff.

"...I was trying to make sugar cookies."

The look you give him simply reaffirms his decision.

"I... see. What's the occasion?" You draw closer to him, staring curiously at the basket. He's thankful he managed to add a blanket on top beforehand, though it would've been nice if he had tied a ribbon around the handle, too.

"It's White Day, so I wanted to give you something special." Helel responded, dropping the tray with a sigh. It was too late to hide it, so why bother?

You hum softly, lips curling into a smile. You grab one of the scones, taking a bite before he can warn you. Yet, instead of spitting it out like he expected, you chewed as though nothing were wrong with it.

"Are- are you okay?" He can't help but ask. He had tried one right before you came- he knew they didn't taste good. So, how was it that you ate the entire scone without even cringing in the slightest?

"Yep, I'm fine. I'm sure you already know, but these are salty." You laugh, quickly grabbing a glass of water and chugging it. Despite the concern he feels, Helel can't help the way his chest warms. 

"Well, yeah, I was going to warn you about that. Can't believe you ate it all- I spat it out immediately. Why did you eat it anyway?" He can't help but ask. You weren't one to shy away from being honest. The fact you looked him in the eye and told him it was salty was proof enough. You weren't scared of him, so why would you put yourself through that?

You give him a smile, tilting your head towards the window. The sun is high in the sky, letting all know that it was sometime in the afternoon.

"You've been here for... I'm guessing at least 5 hours. I don't know how you haven't collapsed yet, but that's not the point right now. The point is," You take his hands into yours, kissing each of his knuckles. "I see your effort, and I don't want to let it go to waste."

Helel, for all his cruelty, his hatred, his grief- cannot be anything but in love for you. To love is to be seen, to be known, and it seems that for all his life, that's exactly what you've done. Seen him, known him, but most of all, loved him.

So, he lifts your hand to his lips, pressing kisses from your palm down to your wrist. He lingers there, letting you cradle his face as he closes his eyes.

It wasn't perfect by all means, but he thinks that this small moment is worth more than anything he could've ever orchestrated. Helel doesn't need endless praise, gifts, or overwhelming acts. All he needed was a bit of acknowledgement, a bit of love.

"Happy White Day, my sun.”

-

ALTERNATE STORY:

Helel did not realize he was that bad at baking. He completely blames Nebuchadnezzar for everything.

"HELEL, HOW THE FUCK DID YOU MANAGE TO MAKE A MONSTER!?"

"HIS NAME IS FREDERICK KREIBURG AND HE'S SORRY TO SAY THAT HE'S FRENCH!"

"WE AREN'T EVEN IN FRANCE! WHAT DID YOU ADD TO THOSE COOKIES? THE CREMATED REMAINS OF YOUR DAD!?"

"...that explains why the sugar was so dusty."

"...Helel Morningstar Babel-"

"Ahaha... ha..."

Yeah, Helel was going to kill his brother if you didn't end up killing him first.

[maochira]

Until the mirror breaks. [Part 1]

[Part 2], [Part 3], [Part 4]

Tags: gn!youngest Itoshi!reader, angsty, overprotective!Rin, Rin is slightly possessive

Sypnosis: Sae and Rin have another sibling who was born shortly before Sae left to go to Spain. Now, a few years later, Sae is visiting home. Before he left, there was no time to bond with his youngest sibling. And by now, Rin has gotten obsessed with the thought of the little one being the next prodigy, causing conflict between the brothers.

Requests open! Itoshi sibling masterlist - current writing event

Sae doesn't dislike you. But he doesn't like you, either. He simply doesn't care about you.

Because he left so shortly after you were born, Sae never got the chance to bond with you. The occasional photos your parents would send didn't do much to him either.

He knows he's your big brother, but he doesn't feel like it.

But you don't know about Sae's opinion of you. You actually feel quite the opposite about him. When your parents announced Sae would visit soon, you got really excited. And so did Rin. Although Rin's opinion quickly changed after talking to Sae for the first time after his arrival.

But now, your parents instructed Sae to spend some time with you. They really want you and your oldest brother to properly bond now.

But Sae just feels cold about it. In no way is he excited or happy about it. He doesn't even know what to do with you, the only thing that jumps into his mind is to play soccer in the backyard. And because that's better than doing nothing, it's what he chooses to do with you.

But he didn't expect it to be so frustrating. Who could have guessed a young child doesn't like sticking to rules and runs around wildly instead?

"How does Rin have the patience for this?" Sae said to himself. He's irritated, kicking the ball around carelessly to get rid of some of the frustration that built up inside of him.

This would have been no problem if you weren't running around so energetically. Before Sae realized he shouldn't have kicked the ball in that direction, it hit you right in the face. The shock and pain make tears stream out of your face immediately.

Sae doesn't know how to react at all. He knows comforting you is the next right move to do, but how is he supposed to do that when he has no knowledge about little children?

"Are you okay?" He asks, but feels a little dumb for asking a question that has an answer so obvious, so only a few seconds later he adds: "I didn't mean to hit you, sorry."

You look up towards him, still crying. The tears on your face cause a bit of guilt in Sae.

Your big brother kneels down in front of you and wipes a tear away with his sleeve. "Let's take you inside." He announces before gently picking you up.

Sure, Sae didn't really care about you. But he's certainly not heartless towards you. He doesn't like being the cause of your pain and tears, but he has no idea how to make you feel better, either. His only idea is to bring you to Rin.

Sae knows how close you and Rin are. The amount of photos of the two of you Sae has been sent by your parents told enough about that.

"Rin?" Sae asked after knocking at the door to the other brother's room. He still held you in his arms.

"What?" Rin's tone sounds annoyed. "What do you wa-" He opens the door and is shocked to see you crying. He immediately takes you out of Sae's arms to hold you close to himself. "What happened?" There is a mix of annoyance towards Sae and worry about you in Rin's voice.

"I accidentally hit them with a ball." Sae responds.

The cold tone of Sae's voice makes Rin angry. How could he be so emotionless after hurting you? How could he be so cold after making you cry?

Rin only looked back at Sae with anger in his eyes. First, he gave up on their dream, and now he hurt you. Rin starts hating the fact that Sae is visiting home for a bit.

"I hope they're not scared of playing soccer because of you now." Rin hisses at Sae.

"You're overexaggerating." Sae responds, sounding as cold as before

"I'm not overexaggerating. I'm worried. I-" Rin doesn't get to finish his sentence, Sae is interrupting him without a care.

"No, you are overexaggerating. A hit in the face won't make them scared."

Rin takes a deep breath before responding once more. "I am reasonably worried."

Sae really doesn't feel like continuing this conversation, so he simply answers a dry "Alright." before heading off to his own room.

Rin looks down at you, running his hand through your hair. "Does it still hurt?" He asks in a voice much softer than the way he spoke to Sae only a few moments ago. Before you respond, Rin spots some dirt on your face and hands, so he takes you to the bathroom and sits you down next to the sink. "Let's get you cleaned up." He forces a soft smile on his lips.

Rin really does not feel like smiling right now. His head is full of angry thoughts about Sae, but he doesn't want to show this anger to you. He knows you need to be comforted right now.

As Rin cleans your face with a wet towel, he tries to comfort you with words. While a part of his words really is comforting, the other part is Rin letting out his frustration about Sae by repeating over and over how much of a bad big brother Sae is for hurting you.

"Sae's just a big meanie, isn't he?" Rin removes the last bit of dirt in your face. "Don't worry, I won't let him hurt you again." Rin's smile has turned into a genuine, comforting one by now. "Let's beat him in soccer one day, okay?"

Rin knows Sae's room is next to the bathroom. The entire time, he's well aware of the fact that your oldest brother can hear him. The choice to leave the bathroom door wide open was actually a conscious choice by Rin, he wanted Sae to hear him. He wanted to provoke Sae.

And that's exactly what happened. Clearly having enough of Rin talking so badly about him to you, Sae leaves his room and stands in the doorframe. "Why are you even saying these kinds of things about me? I didn't even hurt them on purpose." Sae's tone is still cold, but there's a hint of anger in it now. "How am I supposed to bond with (Y/N) how mom and dad want me to, if you tell her I'm a mean, bad brother? And besides, what's up with the talk about beating me?"

Rin doesn't even look at Sae as he answers. "Well, you see, (Y/N) is the next prodigy, I just know it." Rin gently ruffles your hair before he turns his head around to face Sae. "And we're going to beat you."

"Prodigy?" Sae can't help but laugh at that. "How would you even know? They can't even play soccer properly. If they could, the accident earlier wouldn't have happened."

"(Y/N) is great at soccer." Rin's tone turns deffensive. "And I'm making sure to turn help them to get the most out of their potential."

"It's not right to push your dream onto them."

"I'm not doing that? (Y/N) wants to be great at soccer. Right?" Rin changes the direction of his gaze to look back at you. You're a bit confused and overwhelmed with the current situation, but if there's something you know, then it's how you want to be at your big brother's side in everything.

After you nod, Rin looks back at Sae. "You see?" Rin didn't wait for Sae to answer, he just continued speaking. "At least (Y/N) won't leave behind our dream like you did."

"You can count their age on one hand. They have no idea what any of this is about. You're being selfish."

Sae's response angers Rin so much more. Maybe because he knows what Sae says is right, or maybe because he hates the thought of you leaving his dream as well. Or maybe it's both.

Rin opens his mouth to continue the argument, but before a word leaves his mouth, Sae leaves without a word. Rin is about to follow him but decides not to. Instead, he gently picks you up and returns to his room, where he sits down on his bed with you on his lap.

Sae's words keep running through Rin's head, but he simply pushes these thoughts away. He returns his focus to comforting you.

This entire situation confuses you so much. You barely understand what just happened.

What's going on between your brothers?

Is Sae not a big brother to love?

[thecircularsystem]

Recovery and Syscourse Thoughts

I thought I would toss my hat into the ring briefly in the latest discussions about recovery from CDDs, since everyone and their uneducated brother have been spamming screenshots and sources left and right, and almost all of them have ignored the fact that the DSM and scientific (or otherwise) sources are not the people going through this disorder.

So let’s drop this take into the mix: there is no one set way to heal or recover, and everyone should work to find their best method of recovery and what works best for them.

I am a person working on recovery with DID. I phrase it that way specifically because I don’t want to stop having DID. I… actually really like having my system, and being multiple parts. My partner loves it too. They actually are overjoyed when I split — sad that I’m that stressed, of course, and so, so caring and gentle with me when I reach that point — but thrilled that they get to meet another part of me, a part so vivid and developed.

Isn’t it beautiful that I can see that love so brightly?

Anyways. Back on topic, I am recovering with DID. I am utilizing EMDR (though it’s been some time since we did a session) and I attend therapy weekly. I have grown far more integrated, and this past week, we’ve been so soupy that it’s hard to tell who’s fronting, and it hasn’t caused distress. It’s been nice to just be a collection of parts all at the same time, instead of split apart.

But wait. Isn’t that functional multiplicity? I mean, I just said I’m not distressed, and we’re all working together.

But wait. Isn’t that final fusion? All of us together, instead of split apart?

But wait.

How the fuck am I defining it?

Cause doesn’t that matter so much more??? There isn’t a set definition of what FM/FF are, guys. There isn’t this Ideal Recovery that so many people seem to post about. I’ll reach functional multiplicity when I say I do, and my FM will look different than others, and could look like FF too, because FF isn’t “okay now you’re a singlet.” If anything, the FF systems I’ve met have discussed how they feel MORE plural now.

FF/FM isn’t a dichotomy that can only exist separately, and they aren’t even the only ways to heal. For instance, am I not in recovery right now? Am I not actively healing? I might still be disordered, but isn’t it possible to be disordered and functional? Isn’t it possible to heal WITH DID? (The answer is yes; even FM/FF do not erase the fact that I have a rewired brain with new mental pathways. I could become nondisordered, that IS a thing, thought it took years to convince me it was. The fact is, it’s up to the individual.)

And my recovery is going to look entirely different than the recovery of my friends. For instance, I know many of my friends have reached final fusion, and one of them said they split frequently still. But for me, I split maybe once a year at the current moment, max three times a year. It's been a little messy, and confusing, but that seems to be the case. But if you're final fused, shouldn't you not be splitting???

NO YOU CAN DO WHATEVER YOU WANT, FUCK THE RULES!

If that person says they are doing better and feeling fine, then that's what matters. And the fact is, regardless of what a DSM or source you provide says, that's what any therapist worth their salt is going to say as well. If you aren't distressed, then you're good.

The same thing does for anything system related.

Preference of how to refer to your alters/parts/headmates/people in your head/fuckers in your head/those assholes up there who bother you constantly? More power to you! You can call them whatever you want!

Littlecourse and how your littles engage in healing? Woohoo, do whatever makes you the most happy and does the least amount of harm -- or, yknow, harm yourself! That's part of learning too, and people trying to take away the dignity of risk from systems because "but-but think of the children" can go suck a dick. So long as the person is doing what they think they should be doing, why is it my problem?

The only time these things become my problem is when they impact me. And, remarkably, what someone else does with their system does not impact me.

I think so much of syscourse needs to learn to mind their own business when it comes to other people's recovery. What someone calls their parts or origins or recovery does not matter and does not impact me in the slightest. What someone else does on their own time is of no consequence to me. The only thing I see in syscourse that does actually impact me is misinformation about my disorder, which impacts me because it makes our parts who struggle with denial latch onto that...

WHICH IS A ME PROBLEM.

Sure, I correct the misinfo, because that helps me, but that's still a me problem, something I need to work on for me.

I used to be gung-ho about fighting against endogenic systems, and one of the reasons for that was because I had parts who clung to the idea that we might be endogenic. The existence of endogenic systems helping my parts deny that we had trauma does not suddenly mean endos shouldn't exist. It means I need to work on my trauma denial.

This post has been a HUGE ramble, and I'm sorry about that -- there's so many thoughts I Have about recent syscourse, and I usually can squeeze in about 30 minutes of free time to write.

I want to post more about this soon, but to summarize some ideas:

Let people recover however they please.

If someone is recovering in a way you don't like, then look away.

If someone is spreading misinformation, correct them, but like... buddy, do it gently, no need to get all butthurt, relaaaaax

If someone continues to spread misinformation after you've corrected them, more power to you, my guy, do what you gotta do to correct that shit for others if you want to do that

It is exactly Nobody's Job to do steps 3 or 4

And lastly; stop sucking [insert source you just googled]'s cock and talk to a system in real life for like. A half hour, at least. Just get to know how they view their system and what works/doesn't work for them. It might actually make you learn something.

[siriusblackdevotee]

yours tags on the reblog????? i’m going INSANE??????? a hundred yeses!!! esp to the kink feeding into sirius’ pleasure (+ resolving some issues lol) and bringing in mom/dad and sirius is just emotional now bc???? parents??? who love me???? but also horny!!! bc sex!!!

very confusing moment for our baby boy and james is there to hold him through every second of it

I'm a bit shy on that stuff (for reference, here) so it went in the tags, but yes, fauxcest prongsfoot was introduced to me by a mutual who responded on literally the og post and said "what if they're into that" and they told me about fauxcest and it pretty much altered my brain.

The idea started off as just pure smut, like a pwp thing...but then I realized Sirius's desperation for familial connection so I just mixed them with fauxcest and yeah here we are, emotional pwp??

Anyways, James had already noticed how happy and content Sirius gets when he's offhandedly called 'brother' in conversation. "Yeah my brother Sirius" and he would be quietly beaming or struggling not to smile. Because...well Sirius came from a loveless family, I think in this universe even Regulus is ashamed to be his brother so yeah, Sirius desperately needs someone that's truly proud to call him and claim his as family.

So again James knows it's a whole serotonin/ dopamine boost for Sirius but they've never mixed the 'brotherly' part of their relationship with the sexual one cause ig it feels like a line they shouldn't cross?? however, at the same time, I'm thinking they're already used to thinking of each other as a brother that the term kind of just slips out naturally?? During sex, I mean.

So the first time it happens, either Sirius is getting hard?? moans unconsciously?? or cums immediately??? idc, he's like wtf what happened how did that even my body doesn't do that I'm so sorry idk what's wrong with me (basically confused and horny as u say) and James is like shh it's hot it's okay you're fine and yk, cue alot of emotional comfort here bc idk that far into the idea.

And thennn this brings to Effie/Monty. I think for Sirius involving the parents is a lot more overwhelming bc like the sibling progression with James was a slow build up so he could keep up with it?? Hence why it was surprising and yes, a lot, but not as overwhelming as satisfying his desires for Effie/Monty becoming his parents. Like the whole time he's like, I'm fine with being a family with only James, being part of the family but also not really, but once Effie/monty is involved, it's like fantasy is not longer a fantasy?? Like it's been solidified, a reality that he can't look away from??

And btw, the sentence used to involve the parents has to be natural?? If I make sense, like smth incestuous siblings would say?? So that Sirius gets the "oh my god, this feels like a family" vibe???

So yeah he breaks apart and starts crying and James is there to pick up the pieces or...keeps fucking him idk but more importantly, Sirius is finally realizing he is family!! Fully family!! Through the power of sex!! And a lot of crying and comforting!!

Throughout it all Sirius is a complete emotional disaster, a mess, a baby James is coddling and doting on.

anyways, thank u for coming to my ted talk, sorry I didn't answer quickly, I was procacinating

[such-familiar-distance]

Flufftober, found

--

Teunis should have been less drunk to open it.  Or maybe more drunk. He spent the evening pacing the little parlor and bedroom of his boardinghouse rooms after a tense supper with Elion; he had trouble focusing on Elion with the unopened letter in his pocket, unable to make himself speak of it.  It lay on his parlor table while he drank, first small glasses and then straight from the bottle even as he knew he shouldn't.

--

My darling Kallius,

A friend attended a rather remarkable exhibition this spring in Leucarnum and she said the funniest thing.  She said one of the pretty boys running errands for that detestable Thisbe ad Claudiae woman looked remarkably like my favorite little assistant.  I didn't think it could possibly be you, since you were always such a good, polite boy and I know you'd know better than to get mixed up with such a horrible woman causing so much trouble, but I thought I would write to you at the address my friend provided because I have some rather important news I thought you might like to hear, in case it truly is you mixed up with so much trouble.

Our dear Ephaedro has for some years been visiting your lovely mother and father, who I understand are very anxious for any news of what happened to their precious boy.  Ephaedro has spent many holidays with them since they came to enquire about you, after your unfortunate disappearance.  Your charming parents seem very affected by your absence and comforted by Ephaedro's visits.

Your poor parents, like Ephaedro and so many of your unfortunate class, have never managed to learn to read nor write, but I would be more than happy to pass them news of you if you're able to find someone to write your reply for you.  A part of me hopes that my dear friend was mistaken and that you are not entangled with that horrid radical ad Claudiae woman, but another part of me hopes this has reached you so that your poor parents have news of you after all these years.

--

Teunis stumbled out of his rooms after he read it, the walls narrowing as the floor rose up to meet him.  He made it out to the cold back garden before he threw up.

Love,

Domina

[celaenaeiln]

Thanks for answering my questions previously!! I saw that you're not a big fan of fanon batfam and I've been wondering if you consider the batfamily: wayne adventures webtoon canon or fanon?

Someone told me that batman fans aren't happy about the WFA, but have recently accepted it over the Gotham War. Also I feel like WFA is one of the main causes of an influx of fanon fans(? If that makes sense)

WFA is fanon. It was meant to be a fun past time that DC decided to purchase under their name because it has characters they created which means they have copyright claims to it. Also webtoons in general are all fan-made so it's not something that should be taken seriously in the first place.

However here's where it gets confusing. WFA is fanon, but the characterization of the characters is not too far off. Like yes, all of them are way too happy to be truthful to the comics but also it's written that way on purpose because thats the intent.

Another anon asked me about this a long time ago but I've been holding off on it because I don't even know my own feelings about it! I've been religiously avoiding reading it because it mixes canon characterization and fanon in such a perfect way that it's hard to decipher what's true and what's not.

But because it's not canon, I can't use it to back up an argument or explain something because technically it's just digital fanfic that was acquired by DC due to copywriting and business profits.

About influx of fans from WFA - mixed feelings on that as well. You can't really help how you enter a fandom, it's just different and unqiue and it depends on what was going on at the time you entered the fandom. But also when you enter the fandom, you have certain expectations of characters because of what you saw of them them before you entered.

And that's...complicated. I guess I feel like it shouldn't be a problem if people understand that things in canon are different and shouldn't be fought against because it's not like how it's portrayed in fanon or WFA. And I think most people do get that but there's also some people who made some comments about how the Gotham War was terrible writing because the batfamily was fighting and that's not right. A comic shouldn't be judged on how many good feelings it provokes, it should be judged on character portrayal, plot events, character interaction, and excitement. And what Bruce is doing sucks but it makes sense because he's in the middle of a downward spiral. His struggle is way out of control and that's the whole point of the Gotham War. It's well-written for all the above mentioned things even if it isn't the happiest of storylines. But at the same time, I struggle to remember any batman arc that's happy. Hasn't been that way for decades unfortunately.

I'm really confused over WFA so I haven't said anything about it so far because I can't write about something I don't know. I refuse to read it because I just spent years decoding my brain from fanon nonsense and WFA mixes fanon and canon characterization in a way that regresses that effort. So the best I can say for people who enjoy WFA or are coming in through it is, enjoy the webtoon but also have fun exploring the canon comics. They're really great :)

[quintenrosenburgwrites]

mirren sketches >:)

lyrics are from Mixed Messages and Red Flags btw

OH ALSO i wrote some dialogue stuff, see under the read more! warning for some humor that's way more nsfw than i'd usually post (i mean. come on. it's dialtown. they're awkward as hell. they're obviously gonna say something questionable /lh) also some more serious stuff (self hate issues, depression, anxiety)

Nice/Fun stuff:

- They say pretty much everything that comes to mind, and once they get a train of thought it doesn't take long for it to derail and crash through a small community, leaving a trail of destruction behind it. TLDR they're really rambly.

"Birthdays are kinda weird. Like obviously there's the whole counting down to your death thing, but also, like. You're basically celebrating the anniversary of you getting evicted from your mom's, uh. You know. Okay that sounded REALLY, extremely, UNCOMFORTABLY Freudian. Can we PLEASE pretend I never said that? Thanks. Oh, right, the murder case."

- They have a tendency to just accept things and move on without commenting further.

"Oh. You lay eggs. Anyways, can you help me break into the ticket booth? I need to check the entry records."

- They're a fucking dork /pos (They're really sweet, but in a convoluted way)

"I, uh, please don't think this is weird, but I made characters for both of us! This one's named May, and they're kinda a failure. They failed their parents, they failed their old best friend, they failed their job. They used to think they had no redeeming qualities. Then, one day, they meet the other character, Ginger. Ginger seems terrifying initially, and even if it isn't obvious at first, they're not actually human. Ginger and May go on a journey in which May tries to learn magic in order to protect people and redeem themself for their past actions, even though they despise the idea of learning magic, but, eventually... Ginger helps them see their own value, helps May see that they're a person too. They are allowed to be selfish sometimes, they're just as worthy of happiness as anyone else. And, uh, maybe... Maybe that saved their life a bit. And maybe, May is allowed to do things for themself sometimes. Ginger means a whole lot to May, even if they have trouble expressing it, and... uh, I guess that's everything. Um. What do you think?"

Serious, bad stuff:

- They see very little value in themself, and tend to expect others to insult or make fun of them. To combat this, they typically are quick to insult themself, in an attempt to get there before anybody else can. It hurts less if they're the one saying it.

"And before you say it! I know it's super annoying when people are constantly insulting themselves, cause like it comes off as compliment seeking, right? I promise that's not what I'm trying to do, I'm just kinda trying to warn you I guess? But, uh, that's still no excuse, and I can totally just shut up if you want! Or, wait, I shouldn't have assumed it's annoying you, I could just be restating what you're thinking? I mean, the things I'm saying about myself aren't exactly incorrect- Just, let me know if I'm being annoying. I'd rather shut up than annoy you, haha. ha. Wow, that sounded fake."

- They tend to blame everything on themself, and act very self destructively.

"Oh god, this is all my fucking fault, I'm so sorry. It's okay if you hate me- or, no, you SHOULD hate me! Fuck, I'm- Why did you even talk to me in the first place?! Do you realize- If you just- You would've been better off if you just walked past me and ignored me! I need to- This is for your wellbeing, being around me is only gonna make things worse for you. I'll be fine, just- Don't follow me. I mean, I don't know why you would in the first place."

- They put everyone else before themself.

"I need to make it up to them, even if I ruin my life in the process. It's not like my life was looking particularly bright in the first place, which is entirely my own fault, so, y'know. Yeah."

[kolour-me-kourt]

Chapter Twenty: Bad Bitch named … Karma

He kissed her deeply while holding her tightly like he never wanted to let her go. "How did we get here?" She moaned "does it matter YN? You want me?" He pulls away staring in her eyes "yes I want you Melo" "then don't worry about shit else" it was a whirl wind next thing he knew he was about to be inside her again... it had been too long he had waited for this moment again ..... and then he woke up. It had been a week since he laid down everything out on the table for YN and he still didn't know what he was gonna do.

Melo sits up in his bed "damn" he glanced beside him staring at the Instagram model from last night .... He never really looked at her face cause the whole time he was imagining she was YN.... But she didn't feel like YN.

He shakes her slightly "I gotta head out soon... so it's time for you to go" she cracks her eyes "want some more before I go?" She was on mission to get called back and be chosen.... Of course she didn't realize he wasn't available "uh yeah... just do the work" truth be told he woke up hard because of his dream she might as well solve it while she was here. She smiled he groans sliding his dick out of his boxers as she climbs on top of him.

He studied her face when she slides him inside of herself. "Bounce on this dick don't play with it" she moaned moving her hips up and down. He sighed.....

she's not YN

............

It's been a week... and two days and she still hasn't heard anything from Melo. She was wondering if he had decided to just let her be happy in her relationship and not include himself anymore even though he wanted her. She missed her friend.... She always missed him when she knew she couldn't have him worst thing about it is she had no one to talk to about it.

Her girlfriends felt like she shouldn't be friends with Melo at all and the fact that she missed him... they would be quick to judge and she didn't have time for that.

She also missed Jayson right now he had been on the longest road trip of the season he was so tired between games they haven't even been talking .... That is until Ella was at the game on Boston's side court side with her friends.

Jayson reached out to make sure YN knows he went straight to the gym and back to his hotel room alone.... She had to trust him because if she wasn't going to trust him she should've just broke up with him. But right now she was feeling more lonely than ever before and it sucked. So what did she do? Throw herself into her work even more than before.

Her body had been hurting. She would get some of the sharpest pains and what felt like cramps in her stomach and back but she felt like it just had to be her period coming back hard as ever.

She walked into her office the sound of her heels clicked over the floor she presses the button for the elevator taking deep breaths scrolling through her phone. Her straight long hair moved slightly a man walked towards her dressed nicely she could smell him ... it was clearly expensive cologne. She could tell he was looking her up and down so she took a sip of her iced coffee immediately her stomach started to hurt.

"How are you today?" He asked nicely "I'm great ... it's a beautiful day" "I agree with you" "and how are you Mr.?" The elevator finally comes "Sampson Jonah Sampson and I'm great" "hmmm Jonah Sampson are you supposed to be meeting with YN today?" "Yes do you know her? How is she?" YN smiles "mixed reviews but I love her" "oh okay so what's your name?" "YN" they shared a laugh "what's the Likelyhood of this happening" "very slim you're early and I'm late" "we'll I'm excited to meet you... ladies first" "thank you ... I'll just talk to you now since you're here my office is this way" YN slides her Id across the scanner to get into the back where her office was.

She placed her things down "feel free to sit down you can shut the door if you're comfortable" YN says and sits behind her desk

Jonah shuts the door sitting down. "So what brings you in today?" YN asks

"I think you're the perfect person to help me with this .... I have a small start up company and I've seen the events you do for your company I know this isn't really your job but I know you do it on a budget I would like to partner with you guys" "you want me to plan an event?"

"Respectfully" YN laughed "what do I get out of this?" "We have referrals that we'll bring to your company... on a consistent basis you guys can be our go to HR department since we'll be outsourcing for our HR and we'll pay you" "I'm hybrid so I'm not here all the time ... and I'll be helping not doing the whole thing by myself" "that's fine we need your connections and your expertise" "is it just you? Or?" "I have a partner in my firm named Lorenzo"

"Lorenzo ... okay interesting." She says softly "sorry I didn't hear you" "nothing I was thinking out loud but yeah this sounds fine we can do a contract and set everything up between companies however, funneling your people over here for Human Resources is above my pay grade but I can talk to my boss and let you know ... once I get the okay I'll hit you back" "okay great thank you for your time" "thank you as well nice to meet you" "you too .... See you later... you can stop at the front desk to make our next appointment or I'll call you I still have your card" sounds like a plan" he walks out of the office "open or shut?" He asked "shut please thank you!"

It was 9:25 In the morning and she had already started and finished her first meeting of the day. Her assistant knocks on the door coming in smiling. "Who was that fine man you were talking to" "the guy that just left?" "Uh yeah how many fine dudes you talk to this morning" YN laughed "he was fine?" "Uh yes .... You can look you just can't buy" "I honestly didn't notice he was cute it's so early but he's a possible partner so I'll have to talk to Lisa and Alicia sometime today."

"They're both in their office now I can shoot them a email and ask if you can speak with them soon" "okay that's fine .... What else is on the agenda" "well That depends .... Are you in the office all week?" ".... Except Friday I'm off" "welllll you know they're doing the anniversary party Thursday night at the Marriott dress nicely we're all putting in at least 10 dollars to give Alicia a wine basket" "just the company?" "And partners"

"okay what else?" "Today you have client meetings at 12 and one at 2 ... 12 o clock is a new client. Team meeting is 10:30. Tomorrow is Ashley's surprise so—" YN cuts her off "what surprise" "Liam is purposing" "at work?" YN makes a stank face "fix ya face yes at work apparently this is her favorite place to be" "that's sad ... but anyway" "anyway we're holding up signs for that so I'll just get you when he's ready... you have three client meetings tomorrow at 12,2 and 4 Wednesday you're gonna meet with Mr.Sampson and his partner if Lisa and Alicia give you the green light and I'll move your Friday schedule up to Thursday so once I get to all those people and then hit me back I'll let you know more about Thursday" "thank you Leslie ... especially for holding it down while I been traveling"

"and how has that been" "it's been great" "when you going back to Boston" "it'll be a little while.... I'm focusing here" "why?" "Because I'm a busy woman" "and?" "He's busy too" YN pouts "yeah that sounds right" "bye go do some work instead of messing with me" "I'll let you know when Alicia and/or Lisa email me back" "okay thank youuu" "mhm you're welcome" she leaves shutting YN door.

She glanced at her phone sighing then she picks it up FaceTiming Jayson. He answers pretty fast.

"Goodmorning beautiful" "Goodmorning handsome" "you working hard?" "Hmmm not really ... just wanted to check in on you I missed you" " I miss you too .... I'm thinking about coming there when we have our last road trip game" "don't threaten me with a good time" she smiled "I do miss you ..... all of you" "oh you in drought huh?" "You better be too..." Jayson smiled "of course don't do that" "you said it like it was only me" "mhm how has Deuce been doing on the road trip?" "Good honestly just rolling with the team you know it's his favorite thing to do" "it's good they had a break from school at the same time .... So he can turn up with you" "yeah I'm thankful for my mom coming along" "yeah I know it can be tiring" "definitely but it's been going good so I can't complain"

*knock knock*

"You can go now YN"

Thank you Leslie

"Well baby that was my que .... Call me later? I love you" "I love you too I'll call when I have time" "okay bye" "bye"

YN stands up she gets the sharpest in her side it makes her almost fall over. She clearly made a noise cause Leslie came in "are you okay?" "Yeah ,.. I just got the craziest pain in my back... I think I'm fine now"

"okay I'll walk with you to Lisa office" "thank you girl... shit almost took me out" "what you think it was?" "Idk it was worse than a period cramp though... I been getting them a lot" "girl I need you to pay attention to your body" "after this meeting... I'll head to urgent care" "okay bet let me know if you need me to drive" YN knocks on the door "come on in YN!" Leslie laughed shaking her head as YN walks into the office

"Hi ladies I just wanted to run something by you really quick" "okay" "um so I've been propresitioned to help with planning a party for a company in return they will began to outsource their Hr issues here. I would also like first priority for the cases" YN winces after every word taking deep breaths "sounds good to me what type of company" "a small start up construction company" "oh great yeah you can reach out and tell them you've been approved"

"Well okay thank you when do you need it in writing?" "you're welcome just have the contracts done before you start any work.... Anything else? What's wrong?" "I need to go to urgent care my side is hurting" "yes go now why are you here" "it didn't get bad until I was already here." "Go now and keep me updated" "of course" "and have Leslie drive you if you're having issues" "I'll Uber and bring my laptop" "take care of yourself YN" "I am ... I have things to do too though but yes I'm going now"

She laughs slighty walking to Leslie while going into the Uber app requesting a ride "can you call Jonah Sampson and tell him we've been approved we can start looking at contracts this week and then if anyone else has meeting with me tell them to log into teams ... I'm going to urgent care now" "okay but keep us updated ... let me know what's going on" " I will" YN scurries off getting into the Uber as she's rushed to urgent care. Thankfully it isn't packed and they were moving fast.

Within a hour she was in the back she told the doctor her symptoms they did a few exams and then the doctor was back in her face .

"We're going to have to admit you to the hospital your appendix is inflamed it's gonna have to come out" "um what!!" "I'm shocked you've been walking around it's definitely time to put the work down ... call the people you need to call we're scheduling your surgery for tonight it's very routine you'll be fine" "okay ... I um okay" YN immediately calls her mom and her close friends and then she calls Leslie so she could alert the people who needed to know at work.

She wanted to tell Jayson but she was gonna wait until he called her she didn't want him stressed. After she got moved into her private room at the hospital she dozed off. She woke up to her door opening and much to her surprise it was Jayson.

"Am I hallucinating? What type of medicine did they give me?" He kissed her forehead. "No hallucinations I'm here baby" "who called you?" "Leslie" "remind me to fire her" "she looking out for you ... if you would've had surgery without telling me ... we would have a big issue"

"I was waiting for you to call I didn't wanna text you and have you stressed or have you rush here ... exactly like you did" "why not?" "You we're working" "being there for you is way more important stop playing ... I'm not gonna argue with you like this" he kisses her lips again "thank you for coming baby... I'm so glad you're here" "so tell me what's up.. what you having surgery on?" "My appendix..." "how long you been in pain?" "I thought it was my period honestly .... But that came and gone and I was still in pain I wanted to ignore it" "damn I know you were hurting real bad bae..." "yeah... but I'm glad you're here... again I missed you" "I wish I didn't have to see you in a hospital bed ... you don't have to get sick for me to come see you" he joked "kiss me" he kisses her lips slowly the door opens again and it's her mother.

"You don't look sick to me" YN eyes got wide "ma what are you doing here" "you're having surgery ... and you think I wasn't coming?" "Uh ... well Jayson this is my mama ... ma this is Jayson"

"Pleasure to meet you" he walked over to her extending his hand "under these circumstances?" "Of course not. I didn't mean in that way" Jayson became flustered YN rolled her eyes "ma ... stop" "hi Jayson" her mom says walking over

"So what's wrong with the baby?" "My appendix.... They're taking it out tonight" "well.... I'll be here with you all night" "... it's not necessary ma it's so routine I'll only be here for two days at the most" "I'm not leaving.... It's a bathroom in here?" "Not this door but the next one" YN says pointing "okay I'll be back" "I guess you're in good hands" Jayson says holding her foot "yes" "you want me to leave?" "I want you to stay.... But I understand if you wanna go" he walks back over kissing her forehead

"yeah I'll stay" "when you gotta go?" "I'll at least be here today and tomorrow... after that I don't know yet" "i should be back home by then" "that might be when you need me most" "If they put me out that means I'm good" "yeah... I just don't like the thought of you being home by yourself recovering .... Maybe when I'm not there Melo can check in make sure you good?" YN mom came out of the bathroom

"So Jayson when did you get here?" "Not too long before you ... got on a plane and came straight to her" "how long you staying?" "That's actually what we were trying to figure out .... Are you staying long enough for when she's home?" "I'll stay about a week" "oh okay... so after you leave I'll come back and make sure she good" "anybody wanna ask what I want?" "Nope" they said at the same time cause them both to laugh YN rolled her eyes "ha ha ha" YN says sarcastically

"tell Me what you want" Jayson says walking back over to her. "I just wanted to ask you something" "hm?" "You're gonna stay until after my surgery right?" "Of course why wouldn't I?" "You busy..." "mhm and my girl getting surgery" she smiled "okay Jayson" "what? Does that not sound silly? I don't care how busy I am when you need me I'm there" "I love you...." "I love you more.... Let me go call who I need to call and I'll be right back... want some food?" "I can't eat before surgery 😭" "damn" "you can eat bae" "not up here?" "Up to you...I'll be fine if you come back ... promise" "okay Bae I'll be back soon did you want anything Mrs.Ymn" "No Jay I'm good"

After Jayson walked out of the room YN's mom walk Over. "I guess he alright" YN laughed "just say you like him" "I said he's alright"

YN smiled

*two days later

YN was home recovering nicely. She still felt sore but was up and moving around and working from her bed. Her mom was still there helping with small things. Jayson left early this morning so he could make it to his next game.

She still hadn't told him about Melo because everything had been a world wind. However Lamelo did pop up but just to leave flowers he didn't come in. She sighed yeah the friendship was clearly over it sucked but she gets it. Why hurt him even more? Cause she's not losing Jayson.

After a week or so her mom left and she was back up and moving around normally Jayson couldn't come for another two days but she felt like he was trying his hardest to get back so she understood. She did tell him she wanted to tell him something but it's absolutely nothing to worry about and she just wanted to talk it over in person. He could read her tone so he agreed.

Right now though she was heading out to get a few things at Target. Small items deodorant toothpaste those things. When she opened her door she was instantly met with Lamelo. "I swear I was about to knock" he says quickly "you wanna come in?" "Can I?" "Yeah... come on" she moves letting him walk in "if I'm being honest I was contemplating.... Nice to see you up and moving around" "yeah I'm pretty much back to normal ... just short an organ" she tried to make a joke so he slightly laughed "um so what was the surgery?" "My appendix" "oh well I'm glad you good" "thank you" "so um I been thinking and at this point it's two weeks Damn near.... Um I can't do this anymore .... I'm with other women I'm thinking about you and you .... well I get it I understand I tried to play the cocky role cause you like that hoping you would come back to me but when that didn't work I really was just like .... Damn so I guess what I'm trying to say is until I can Fr get over you we shouldn't have any contact"

"let me just... cause on one hand I get it but on the other... you wasn't in love with me or in like with me until I got in a relationship Melo" "that's not all the way true" "how is it not? Until you had to fight for me you wasn't caring .... But you know what I get it take all the time you need it's been real I got shit to do" "so what?" "I won't contact you Melo" "just like that?" "What you want me to do?" "I don't know what I be expecting from you dead ass" "Me Either!!" "Alright... Jayson wins" YN rolled her eyes

"I'm not some trophy and until you realize that you won't get over me.... That's your real problem you're trying to compete when their is no competition that's my man period" "hmm alright" he walks pass her and then stops turning around "bye YN" she glances over her shoulder "bye Melo" she waits to hear his footsteps and the door open and close before she sat down. She slowly began crying. Her phone began ringing and she realized it was Jayson she didn't know when she would talk to him again so she tried to fix herself and then answer. "Fuck fuck fuck" she says softly

"Heyyyy bab—- what's wrong?" He said "it's about what we need to talk about I just ... ughh I'm so dumb" "let's talk now" "no cause you're gonna get mad and I need to hold you" he smiled "I'll respect that but can you please stop crying?" "Yes of course ... it's stupid anyway" "your feelings not stupid bae" "how was your day" "real good .... I'll be on flight to see you in about four hours" "that makes me feel wayyyy better" "you been up and moving around?" "Yeah I was about to head to target... just gotta get myself together again"

"while you there get me some t shirts and boxers" YN laughed "regular t shirts? Or like under shirts? Or like graphic tees?" "Uh like a black one and a white one" "for any special reason?" "No just need some extra" "oh okay cause you know I'll wash your clothes if you're running low on outfits" "yes I know bae...and I thank you" "mhm always ... that's how you know I love you" "I fucked around and learned how to cook some quesadillas so I wanna fix you those tonight ... how that sound?" She smiled "really good bae"

"I'll cook ... we can talk and makeup...you cleared for sex?" "Sadly no... I have to go back in in tomorrow and he'll let me know then... but it could be like two more weeks" "mmm damn baby... really a drought for us" "you still wanna come?" She pouts "Bae of course I'm coming" "good... I miss you" "just because we have a lot of sex doesn't mean we're only sex... we really in this thing .... I really love you .... Okay?" "Okay" YN hears the door open and it's Brandy and Deuce

"need me to go?" She said softly "wait a second" Deuce comes over talking a mile a minute "I want you to talk to someone real quick this is daddy's special friend Mrs.YN" "Hi Mrs.YN" " Hi Deuce how are you?" She almost wanted to cry even though it was over the phone it was still big. "I'm good how are you" "I'm good too" "hey YN" Brandy said "YN is daddy's special friend" Deuce says to Brandy causing everyone to laugh "hi Mrs.Brandy I hope you're good today" "I'll see you later beautiful ... let me get everything ready so I can see you tonight... I love you" "I love you too" she hangs up taking deep breaths she goes to Melos number deleting the contact and blocking him on social media. Then she gathers herself heading to target.

*four hours later

Jayson had already texted saying he was down the street so she was waiting patiently at the door. When he appeared in front of her she nearly cried.

"I know that's not no tears?" "I missed you soooooooooo damn much" he kisses her lips "promise I missed you more" she takes his hand placing it in her panties. "Oh fuck" he groaned "you know I can't do anything about this..." he slides his fingers inside her and then quickly pulls them out tasting her. "Yes I know hopefully I'm cleared tomorrow" she smiles pulling him in the house fully.

"Yeah but don't rush healing ... over some sex I'll always be here" they began walking to the couch but he remains standing she sits down in front of him smiling "always?" "Mhm which leads me into this talk ... I been stressing about what you had to say especially since you was crying earlier ... so do me a favor and just say it straight up" YN bits her lip sighing

" Melo says he's in love with me....And wants to be with me he also men—" Jayson laughs cutting her off "ima handle this" "what does that mean?" "Exactly what I said ... anything else we need to talk about?" "I was hoping you would elaborate" she said timidly

"bae I told you ... I been telling you so I don't know how to make it anymore plain" she stands up pulling him into a hug "I told him we couldn't be friends anymore until he gets himself together I told him I love you and I only wanna be with you ... I was brutally honest. I only told you because I didn't want any secrets with us... it wasn't to be messy or start anything between you and him" Jayson sighs kissing her forehead "the beef started the moment he came over here telling you that shit .... But okay thank you for letting me know" "I love you" "I love you too"

[reinabeestudio]

It's still early for me (at the time of posting this), but I wanna do some retrospection before I enter the new year

(it's heavy & long, feel free to not read it)

The first half of 2024 was... rough, to put it gently.

January was alright, I'm glad I found out about UT Yellow bc it's a wonderful game (I'd like to go back to it sometime, but that's not the point here). But then February came and it's when things got bad.

I met some people I thought I could call friends (I will calm any doubts now: if you can read this, this isn't about you :]). I'm not gonna pretend like I was an innocent victim, the way I reacted to certain things wasn't the best. I did apologize afterwards, but the damage was done. Yet there's also the truth that I was in a very bad place, mentally speaking. I'm not good with friendships, mostly for the fact that I don't consider myself interesting and I expect things to eventually crumble—as you will read later, it's something I'm working on.

I was paranoid everyday as I waited for the other show to drop. Things were going well for too long. I had my very first ever anxiety attack and I was called dangerous for it. In my worst, lowest moment, I was isolated.

I had some people that stayed with me, even when they learned everything about the ugly situation. I'm thankful for those people, being a rock when I was feeling so lost.

On the bright side, I got help. That is, I finally managed to start therapy. It's been working wonders so far, I'm so grateful to my therapist with how much she's been helping me. Turns out there's a lot to unpack there, many knots in my soul related to my family and social life.

Amidst these rocky times, I was reached out by an old contact from a very old former friend group. The Incident(tm) that birthed this deep fear of losing people I love by simply caring, for years thinking of myself as a burden that people tolerate until I'm not fun anymore. Everything wrong that happens is my fault, it was my thought process. Like a sword through the heart. Everyday I bled and it hurted, but I had to carry it as a form of atonement. You'll get used to it, eventually.

I was explained everything then, what this other former friend did during these years. How my life was utterly fucking ruined for several years because this person bad-mouthed me behind my back to the point that I was ghosted with no explanation. I remember after everything:

'It was not your fault.'

In that moment, I felt a heavy burden lift off my shoulders. 11 years of guilt gone in a minute. This situation mixed with a session where I was talking to my therapist about certain family drama that happened during my teen years and her words also hit me like a hammer.

'You were only a kid, [Yomiel]. It was not your fault.'

It wasn't my fault. I shouldn't have had to go through these painful things.

When I was back home I felt so much anger, bottled up for years thinking it was an unjustified feeling, thinking I didn't DESERVE to be angry ('everything wrong that happens is my fault'). But under that anger, was a feeling of betrayal. And that betrayal led to sadness. And that sadness just caused me to break down into tears. I didn't know how much I needed to cry until that moment. Mourning the loss of years of happiness stolen by other people that didn't like me and instead of just walking away, they hurted me.

I've been better since then! I have good days and I have bad days. There's a long road ahead of me leading to recovery, but for the first time in a decade, I'm full of hope. Earlier this month, someone very dear to me came back after several months of little contact due to being busy themselves. I don't mind waiting, I will always wait for my loved ones (life happens, especially when you're older. Among many other reasons). But having them back felt like having family back, bringing warmth back inside the house that we call life.

Awful things happened to me, and it wasn't fair how I was treated. I'm no saint, no one is. I'm flawed, it comes with being human. But being flawed doesn't mean I'm a horrible person. It's true that things get better. The sword was taken off my chest, and it hurts so much. But now the wound can heal, and the heart can beat and love again.

Maybe these events in my life are a sign from the universe, or something (very cheesy, I know). 'Time to let go of the past, of things that can't be fixed, of people that don't like you. And enjoy life in company of those that want you', I feel it's telling me.

Hopefully, 2025 is the year where I can start anew.

Thanks for your company 👑✨

[ramonag-if]

I lost track of this wip for a long time but I'm so glad to have found it again. Just finished my first playthrough since way back when this was just two chapters long and I am so delighted and impressed by the quality of writing and quantity of content! Also!!! I gotta gush about Salyra and Ahlf for a second.

You have made characters that are so flawed and so lovable in a way I very rarely see and it's fantastic! The more I learned about each of them and their interactions with the MC (many of which poor MC didn't even know about) the more I'm fascinated by them. So many of the revelations made genuinely hurt so deeply, Ahlf being the old leader of the blood guard, Salyra's new family, Ahlf never sharing her letters and lying about MC being happy and fine, Salyra's bid to fix the war by having a mixed race baby blessed by the gods, it's all terrible and my poor MC is heartbroken because these two people who should have loved her did such a bad job of it but she's also conflicted because she'd like to at least think that they do actually love her! They were trying to do their best while also being fairly self-centered people. The angst is so so good! And for all that I can fault these characters I can also kinda see their lines of reasoning. It makes sense that Ahlf wouldn't want Salyra back in his or the MCs life, both out of spite and out of real concern for the safety of his child cause like, who goes to give a baby god powers with the express disapproval of their partner??? You can't trust a person after that.

And while it sucks that Salyra has a whole new family now she's more than just the MCs mom, she's a whole ass person and so of course she continued to do the things that people do even without MC around, she continued to live and love and make questionable choices. It's shitty that she never came back, but the vibe I've gotten from both the game and your responses to asks here is that she was under the impression MCs life was better this way, that their life shouldn't be uprooted again, that they knew at least some version of the truth about where she was and how she was.

Never mind her involvement with the princess and the repercussions her counsel has had on countless people! She's so interesting and tugs my emotions in so many different directions. I pity her and I loath her, and I'm playing a character who loves her so much but is crumbling under each new revelation and it's so so good.

And oh my God another thing I appreciate is how consistent your characters are, even when it doesn't paint them in a good light. Salyra is described by many people as stubborn but stubborn is one of those traits that I often see written with only the positive connotations in mind. A character is "stubborn" but it always works out for them, it only chafes the other characters who are bad guys or antagonist, it's more determination and it's tempered and righteous and leads to good outcomes because "you should never stop trying, never give up!", but like that's not proper stubbornness. Salyra is stubborn to the point of ruin, she charges forth with what she thinks is best with what seems to me is little regard for the input of others and it appears to have gone disastrously in many places but she just. keeps. going!!!

I'm having so many feelings about these characters omg. I have so many questions! Though at the forefront is does Salyra even love MC or does she just love the potential she saw in them, the plan she had for them, the symbol they were supposed to be? This ask is so long and for that I do apologize I just wanted to let you know how fantastic I think this story is and I guess express my undying love for the way you've written Salyra, even if it does break my heart lol

Have a great day!

Thank you for finding your way back to the game 🌼 I forget that the game was at one point just a few chapters in and now we're a just past the halfway mark of the full game 😅

I'm really glad you're enjoying Ahlf and Salyra as characters. I never intended to make them this flawed or angsty, but as I wrote their scenes, their characters did become more than the idea I had for them and suddenly Ahlf was emotionally detached and Salyra was heading straight towards martyrdom. I like showcasing realistic characters, which is how I view Ahlf and Salyra. I've always enjoyed family dynamics that aren't always depicted as happy and perfect or the fights are trivial at best so this was a lot of fun for me to write such a complex and painful family.

I've always been stubborn myself, so I know that it can be more of a flaw than it can be a good thing. With Salyra, I based her on a lot of different leaders who would often be successful at rebellions but have really bad personal lives because they were so focussed on their ambitions that it got in the way of everything else. Salyra's best and worst quality is her stubbornness, it's what gotten her this far, but it's also what's ruined her personal relationships around her.

Salyra does love the MC, though you as a reader need to determine if she loves the MC because they're her child or because she can't separate the MC's existence from the plans she once had as them being a symbol of peace and unity 😅 It will depend on your playthrough and there is no right way to interpret her feelings towards the MC. As the writer, I can understand how she might seem to genuinely love the MC and how to others, she might seem like she's manipulating the MC or only loves the idea of them. So you'll need to ask yourself after weighing up her actions and words if it's enough to prove genuine love or not.

Please don't apologise for the long ask 💖 I enjoy reading everyone's take on the characters and the game. It's always my favourite part about sharing updates and the story with others so we can all gush about it together. Thank you for your support 😊

[selvie-blue]

Selvie... In The Buff

I've got my headphones on, at the moment, listening to a change should do you good. I've been at this writing game for a while, now. And, as I'm sure many have noticed, my writing tends to go through waves. This is because, most of my life, I've made the mistake of comparing myself to others. While it can be empowering to use others as inspiration and even empowering to say competition can sometimes be good for you, this shouldn't always be the case. I shouldn't always feel like I'm waiting behind the velvet rope of the latest and hottest club in town and trying to convince the bouncer at the door I'm worth going in while slipping him a 20. I'm sure that same bouncer probably wouldn't understand the complex and cosmic metaphor of that 20-dollar-bill being the symbol of my insecurities simply trying to mask itself in the petty representation of this paper we use to trade and barter. And let's just say, if this were real, his bouncer friends would already be dragging me away while saying, DUDE, YOU'RE TOO FUCKIN' WORDY!

You see, the first time I stepped away was much like the second time I stepped away. I felt like I just wasn't getting enough of a reaction or enough likes or enough shares. That my writing wasn't enough. And maybe, I wasn't enough. And I found I wasn't writing for the sheer joy of writing. I was tap-tap-tapping at the keyboard, typing up words pushed forward from this paranoia in my head, QUICK! QUICK! GET IT OUT, NOW! Or you'll be forgotten, faded into obscurity. And people will suddenly look at me with pity saying to themselves, There goes Selvie Blue, holding up that sign: will write for 15 minutes of any kind of attention. And, while it may be good to write within boundaries and try to appeal to the general public, it shouldn't be the only thing that drives me. It should a balance. Trying to get my work to be more relatable while still being authentic to me and to myself. And this all had me asking myself, what would my niche be? What would make me different?

Well, the answer is, I don't want to think about it too much. Thinking too much can cause creative head-aches, to which I'll have to metaphorically pop some metaphorical happy pills that would be a bite-sized fast-food version of a road to enlightenment. Like it should be so easy to feel like a wise, thoughtful person that can meditate so effortlessly, I'd literally be floating in the air. “Look, everyone! No strings!”

But I think that we're all well aware that our own consciousness and thoughts can come with strings attached. This got me to thinking about other things I've always wanted to say, things I've always wanted to write about: thought-provoking pieces about the frustrating divide of male nudity versus female nudity in Hollywood, a countdown of my favorite ENM movie scenes and going into descriptions of why they're my favorite written with pathos and humor, maybe also a countdown of my least favorite scenes of both ENM and just male nudity in general. Mainly converting into an article-based format revealing me as a person, exposing my innermost thoughts and desires, what makes me tick, what drives me, and what makes me want to keep moving forward as well as what makes me afraid. All the while, still writing ENM fiction and including that in the mix. (Including continuing my Dinner and A Show story).

I think, for me, I should be more honest with myself. Yes, I wanna see if my writing gets any reactions. Yes, I wanna know if I'm, at all, popular. Maybe if I'm honest with that part of myself, I can use those parts of me that want so desperately to be liked and recognized to shape a new person. Smooth over these characteristics and then just take a deep breath. Stop kidding myself by saying it doesn't matter if I get recognition or not. I mean, seriously, do you really think all those actors saying, It was an honor just to be nominated, are telling the truth??? Probably a more accurate portrayal is when Samuel L. Jackson was passed over for an Oscar and you could literally see him mouth the word, shit. Or fuck or something like that. And then, I can come to the realization that it doesn't have to be one or the other. I think that several of us here that write these stories do want to be recognized. Not saying that for everyone as I'm sure just as many do it because they want to with the only thing driving them forward is, indeed, the sheer joy of writing. But, hey, I'm sure that at some point in our lives, we all wanted attention, we all wanted to be told, you did a really good job. I also want to celebrate why we're here, whatever your reason is. I want to prop up instead of thinking of ways of trying to race ahead while yelling, Look at me! I'm being so different and clever, you'll never catch me! Before running, face first, into a pole and realizing I probably should have ordered that slice of humble pie while dining at that restaurant titled: This is a literal representation of you.

I want to get better at, well, everything. Basically, I still want to be me, just an improved version of me. Not changing for the wrong reasons, but rather, shedding my nervousness and intimidation and pettiness and need to compare myself to others while still retaining at least a piece of all those bad parts of me to help me on my journey to a more advanced Selvie. You see, I don't want to think of it as being freed from chains, but instead, using these fears and insecurities as ways to go through the chains. I want to accept me as I am, both the good and the bad, and maybe, just maybe, I'll have found at least some kind of enlightenment and I wouldn't even have to order it from the drive-thru lane of McDonald's to get it.

Now, at this point, you're probably thinking, Selvie. This article is titled, 'Selvie In The Buff.' Please don't tell me that that was just a symbolic title to represent the exposure of your deepest fears and desires and to relay to us the naked embrace of everything that makes you you and give your article an eye-catching, click-baity title. Either put up or shut up, man. Let's see some skin! OW!

And to which, I'd respond, Of course it was symbolic man. Pfft. Well, that's it for now, BYE EVERYONE!

Okay! Okay! JK, people. Geesh! While, yes, it is a symbolic title, I actually do want to use the flesh of my naked body to represent a metamorphosis. That I am stepping forward more as myself while still working on me physically, mentally, and emotionally. And while I still have insecurities about myself and my body, I also want this to be another way to say that this is just me.

Oh, and it's a shot from the shoulders down. Sorry, not going to show myself from head to toe. Not sure if I will, but maybe someday. And since this is Tumblr and I don't want to take the chance of this article being either flagged or not even getting to be published just because of the nudity of a consenting adult male, this is only a pic of my torso. If you wanna get the full pic, then click here. With that said, here is me: awkward, sometimes overthinking, energetic, weird, wonderful me:

[irmimimi]

Sacrificial Lamb 🕛

Tears. Lots of tears dripped down the boy's rosy cheeks, staining his white shirt.

He whimpered, choking on his own saliva, unable to mouth a single proper word from the horror. He can't do anything else but watch the short -pitch black- creature's deranged faces and hear their ugly laughs as they drag him deeper into the forest.

Two of them painfully hold his legs up and two his arms, treating him more like a child would treat its dolls than an actual human being.

That's when you know that you're very much fucked up.

The creatures -whom most of them wore an old maid dresses- dropped him to the ground, on top of a very suspiciously shaped rock. He gasps as he hits his back hard. But that shouldn't be bothering him now.

He should be more bothered that they're tightly tying his hands with a rope, spreading his limbs apart with no way of ever breaking out.

He should be more bothered that their leader, Irmi, is following them from behind and has now reached them.

Show no mercy!

Show no mercy!

They're whispering -or at least try to, because some of them speak unknown words and make animalistic sounds- in sync as they make a perfect circle around the terrified man.

Irmi raised her hands and smiled blissfully towards her little -but rather strong- creatures, giving them the permission to light up their torches and stick them in the dirt in front of them.

Smoke filled the man's lungs causing him to cough continuously and slowly lose his consciousness to a point that he almost passes out. His head feels heavy as if he had been drinking and smoking blunts for hours straight.

Show no mercy!

Irmi looked up the clear black sky. No clouds just stars, a perfect summer night. A perfect night to perform a long bloody sacrifice to yourself.

She turned towards the creature beside her, calling it by its hypothetical name -Chiros- and asked for the time. And hypothetically, it answered back in fluent English. "11:58"

Irmi nodded playfully and petted its head, holding it close to her like a child.

She must really love her maids...

Before the man could gain back control of his mind and make the whole procedure hard for them, Irmi pulled out a knife. It was shahin Kris dagger type with painfully clear curves and was close to six inches long. The man -even though dizzy- saw it and let out an exhausted grunt.

Irmi tantalizingly sharpened the blade in front of him, spreading as much fear as possible. "11: 59" the other thing said again and everyone grew even more excited and desperate to see him die than before.

She came closer and sat on her knees, -leaning as close to him as possible- almost on top of him. Quickly, she tears the man's shirt off, leaving him bare-chested for easy access. She quickly shifted the blade, curving a sigil in the middle-to-left part of his chest's skin.

With that done, she wrapped her hands around the handle of the knife and brought it up, positioning it just above the place where the man's heart should be. If his drowned cries aren't motivating enough then the thought of his poor soul becoming your possession in a few seconds definitely is.

"12:00"

The moment the clock struck twelve, the knife was pledged into his flesh, pierced right through the heart.

The guy's scream was completely muffled by the applause, loud cheering and bells ringing by them in the middle of the night.

The man surrendered, the life faded from his eyes and the last thing he saw was the creature's clapping, happy grins and his heart getting ripped out of its original place. For a brief second, he watched his heart being out of his body, stabbed by the knife and yet still beating in agony.

🍻

That's how it always ends for the pitiful, unlucky people that she decides to sacrifice to herself. After that, all of the creatures would perform a sick shedule where they would collect the person's blood and mix it with fresh wine. Some is drunk during the ritual and some is kept. Usually they would eat parts of the body while ritualistically dancing around the sacrificed 'lamb' as a sign of excitement and satisfaction.

Good feasting.