#And our missing hearts is too soon too close to home set in a far too possible near future and my mental state noped out

[foxghost]

After finishing they both die at the end, I listened to on earth we are briefly gorgeous, and then my hold for our missing hearts came in so I started that

And

Nahhhhh

Not that it isn't good

It is Very good

I think I'm just all full up on sad asian lit for now

[websterss]

COMMON COLDS — GUILDFORD DUDLEY

REQUEST: Can I request one for Guildford Dudley x fem reader, in which they have been friends and courting for a really long time and she faints or get sicks and Guildford is really worried about her and stuff. @arianagrandes-things

WARNING(S): angsty, some fluff

WORD COUNT: 2,466

PAIRING: Guildford Dudley x Ethian!Reader

A/N: I hope you enjoy it! Feedback is always welcomed! Gracie Abrams "I love you, I'm sorry" song has me sat and on a writing spree LMFAO

MASTERLIST

Guildford could not help the way his heart fluttered upon the mere sound of your joyous laughter. He felt boyishly in love with you watching you take off into a sprint through the field of flowers. Your carefree nature and optimism made him love you more and more each day.

He had let you get as far as you could before he’d begin running after you to catch you in his arms. Though you hadn’t made it very far before you stumbled to a stop.

“I don’t believe you understand our little game. Would you care for a refresher?” His smile faded as he slowly approached you. “Y/n…Are you alright-“ He barely got out before he hurried to you, preventing your head from colliding with the ground. “Y/n! Bertie!” He shouted for the servant. “Somebody help!” It was way into the evening that he realized he was practically screaming into the void. He grew startled when you morphed into your Ethian form. A golden beauty with fur, you now lay as a golden retriever in his arms. He didn’t waste a moment to bring you back to the house. He held you close, in hopes to not jostle you around too much.

He entered the manor, shouting at the top of his lungs for help. “Somebody help! Somebody! Please help!” Before he could catch the attention of any staff, he was interrupted. “What in God’s name has got you in a tizzy, Master Guildford? Oh, dear heavens?” Bertie gasps as she catches sight of your Ethian form.

A few feet from the stairs you had turned again. Your delicately soft features graced him again. “Y/n, can you hear me?” He tapped your face lightly. He was met once again with silence, and then once again you had taken your animal form. He huffed in disbelief, as he hurried to get you to your shared bedroom. "I need you to send word for Miss Lady Jane Gray. Her presence is needed here, right away!"

The journey to the bedroom seemed to have taken an eternity, though it had really been only a few minutes. You had shifted back and forth between your human form and animal form five times more before you were finally settled into the bed. Once Guildford managed to get you into the room, he closed the door behind him and gently set you on the bed. He sat on the edge of it, staring in disbelief as your snout and floppy ears lolled to the side. He couldn’t take his eyes off of you, waiting for you to shift back.

“Fuck! Why aren’t you changing back?!” He barked. Without thinking, he began to pet you. His hands ran through your soft fur as he ran the pad of his thumb over your velvety black nose. “Please…” He murmured as he continued to run his hand over your body. To his slight relief, he felt you starting to shiver. The shaking in your limbs started from your paws and then up through your body. In seconds, you had changed back into your human form. You were a sweating mess and you trembled uncontrollably as you lay on top of the duvet.

Guildford’s breath hitched at the sight of you in your weakened, fragile state. “Y/n, can you hear me?” He reached out again to gently touch your shoulder. He received no reply. Your body rippled once more and you were nothing more but a dog before him. "Jane will be here soon enough. You'll be as good as new and begging me to take you on a walk in the evening again." He mustered a faint laugh before he felt his chest cave in. Soft tears trickled and spilled down his face. "I'm sure of it."

-

Jane's travels to their home had been about half a day's worth. Rupert had ensured her safe passage.

The sun had risen and set by the time Guildford had greeted Jane at your room. He didn't hesitate to make his way up to the second landing after the day reached its evening call. His paces determined to see if your state had improved throughout the afternoon.

When he reached the bedroom door, he paused for a moment in the doorway. His eyes fell on you lying motionless as the same, golden retriever. Before he could take a step into the room, he heard a soft voice say behind him, “Guildford?”

Guildford jumped and twisted around to face the soft, familiar voice. “Jane…I didn’t hear you come in.” He gave her a meek smile before he turned his attention to you. "T-Thank you for coming…Y/n, she's been-" He trailed off.

“How long has she been like this?” Jane looks at you, watching your figuration switch back and forth between your human self and dog-like self. She counted a ten-second interval. It was how long before your transformation began and ended within each shift.

“It's been an evening and a day. It has been an endless cycle of transforming from her Ethian form and herself. It's almost as...she can't control it. I'm more afraid of her stopping in her dog form and not being able to transform back...Can you help her?"

Guildford watched as Jane studied you. Her eyes darted along the length of your body, now turned fur, then your face, now turned snout, then down to your feet, now turned into paws, her eyes darting amongst you. She finally let out a huff and returned her gaze to Guildford. "Fever, trembling of the body, uncontrollable transformation…Does Y/n get ill often?"

"Never. Y/n has always had the constitution of a horse, no jesting intended. She's hardly ever been unwell. She has never been this poorly…" Guildford's face paled as realization hit him. He looks up at Jane, wary. "What of her systems? Do you believe her to be severely ill? The affliction?"

Jane gave a thoughtful look as she mulled the possibility over, then shook her head. "In short, no. Some Ethians are hardy and hard-to-off people." Her face gave a small, reassuring smile, "A fever of this magnitude, for one, cannot kill you, but this much I'm certain…Your beautiful healthy fiancé has nothing more than a mere cold…" Jane's smile widened as she shook her head.

Her comment had brought on a moment of levity, and Guildford chuckled in return. Guildford’s eyes widened in disbelief. Did he hear that correctly?

"A cold? You surely jest. All of this worry for such a common ailment?" Guildford exhaled a quiet huff of air that he hadn't been aware he'd been holding. He looked back at you, relief sprouting like roots within him. "A cold? A common cold can do this to her. Here I was afraid I was losing my wife to whatever disease plagues the country only for you to examine her and diagnose her state as a cold." A small, nervous laugh escaped him.

"Indeed." Jane chuckled to herself as she observed the look of relief and disbelief from Guildford. "Y/n is fine. I'm certain she'll wake up in a few days. The illness will pass," She tried to reassure him as she continued to watch your body change back into your canine form. "However, you, on the other hand, look like you've hardly slept a wink."

Those words struck a nerve. His lack of restful sleep through the day was a sore spot for him to say the least. Guildford ran a hand through his hair and huffed, "I'm exhausted, to say the least. I couldn't…I didn't want to leave her alone, but dawn neared, and I…She fainted in the meadow Jane. She fell in my arms, and wouldn't wake. The relief of knowing that I won't lose her, that she only has to bear a cold is solacing." Guildford glanced at you to ensure you hadn't changed before he continued. "I'll be sure to rest once you've given me proper instructions on what to do." Guildford turned his focus back to her, waiting for her instruction.

"Keep her warm, ensure that she's hydrated, and give her plenty of rest. Keep a cold wet cloth on her forehead to help with the fever. Ask Bertie to make her a broth, to add mint. I think I may have some herbs that will help with a cough though she doesn't appear to have one at the moment, but if she does then give her these. One contains Sage and the other Mullein, best if taken as a tea. Her transformations are within 10-second intervals, if I'm certain, they'll slow down. For now, she'll transform multiple times in a day from what I've observed, but I would keep an eye on her." Jane smiled at him softly, "Send for me if something else occurs. I'll be here as soon as I can." She places her hand on his shoulder.

Guildford could tell Jane's reassurances were well-intended, but he felt himself wanting more. He didn't know if he was being over-worried or not. "You're absolutely sure that there's nothing else? She'll be absolutely fine?" He gave her a look that begged for further assurance.

"She's strong and healthy as a horse. I'm certain she will pull through this."

Guildford chuckled at her words, hoping that his worries would be unfounded. "You're quite right about that." He turned to look at you in your canine form again. "Thank you, Jane." He mumbled quietly.

"I'd do anything for you and Y/n. You know of this as I know that she is your reason to live. She's my best friend, but she's your world. I'd hate for her to be taken from you...from me."

Guildford was touched by her words and felt himself almost break down again. He'd been in pieces for the past few hours. Jane was right; you were his world. Everything about you was the very air that he breathed. He'd fall apart if you were dead, or worse, taken.

He looked over to Jane not denying her truth, giving her a shaky nod and faint smile. She tilted her head before rushing over and letting him lean into her embrace as he sat in the chair. It wasn't long before his body shook with uncontrollable tears.

She hadn't meant to cut off his needed crying, but she was brought back to what he said early. "Wait, you said wife."

"What?" He wiped at his eyes, bewildered as she shoved at his shoulders.

"You said, wife!"

"Yes, I said wife. Because she is my wife," Guildford sputtered out. He was still very upset and slightly confused by her interrogation of his wording.

"You married without me there to bear witness, you bastards!" She gasped at him. "When did this occur?"

Guildford felt his heart begin to beat with anxiety because of Jane's tone, and her question alone. He came to a small realization.

You didn't tell her shit.

"Oh fuck, she never told you? I-It was a simple, private affair! Small ceremony. She did not want to wait."

"Could have waited for me!"

"She didn't want to! We-I...We just couldn't be apart from one another a second longer than we had to!" The panic in him was slowly dwindling into annoyance. "Y/n was impatient, she wanted out of her mother's house as soon as the chance allowed for it. You know how infuriating that woman is, gods I would want out of that house too-" He began pacing. "-And I could not bear another moment not being her husband. So we got married, we are married!" His voice began to grow louder as his face flushed. "She is my wife, I am her husband. Husband." He held up his left hand to display his ring. Then he went to grab your wrist lifting it in the air for Jane to see your beautiful golden band. In the midst, your hand transformed into a paw. "Wife- Oh!" He placed your arm down gently. "We did not think about the ramifications! We only thought of each other! So forgive me Lady Jane if you were not in attendance to bear witness to our unity as man and wife!" Guildford exhaled, taking a few moments to calm himself. He ran his hands through his hair.

"Was she beautiful?" She pouted. "Tell me everything. I want to know. Was her dress perfect?"

Guildford paused his pacing as a smile broke out over his face.

"Oh, gods. Beautiful hardly describes the way she looked. It was as though…the angels of heaven descended from their clouds and wrapped her in the finest silks and satins, and jewels. She was immaculate." Guildford looked over at you as you transformed back to yourself. The memory of you in your wedding dress flashed before his eyes and a wide smile spread across his face. The image of you walking down the aisle was still his most prized memory. He'd always said that you glowed like the sun itself, the only sun he could love. "Gods, she was breathtaking. I bedded her the moment we arr-"

"Ah, no! She doesn't tell me everything for good reason!" Jane shivered, covering her ears. "Shameless!" She shook her head at him.

Guildford chuckled at her disgust. "It was our wedding night," He held up his hands in defense. "What is a man to do after marrying the love of his life?" His cheeks flushed as he remembered the memorable evening. He looked up to find Jane feigning a gag. "Oh, don't be so prudish! She's my wife! It would have been a sin to not have bedded her!" He gave her a look of mock offense, but he was amused by her. "And besides, you didn't have to know." A wicked little smile pulled at his mouth. "Now you will never be able to un-know. You can never un-know that I bedded my wife on our wedding night." He said the words in a sing-song voice that drove Jane up a wall.

"You're insufferable, Guildford Dudley!" She huffed at him, throwing up her delicate arms.

"And yet...you adore me for it all the same," He said, flashing her a signature Dudley smirk. "You're acting as though I broke some code of womanly etiquette. You asked for the details and I gave you the answers! No, I gave you the truth! A wife should be loved and ravished by her husband…frontward and backward." He tried to make a serious face but his growing smile betrayed him. He flinched away from Jane's bewildered look, her hands shooting out to smack him silly.

"Animal!" She gasped.

"I am...I was." He smirked at her. "With her. You may leave now, thank you for your help." He sighed pushing her out of the bedroom. Winking at her a farewell before shutting the doors in her face. "Goodnight."

"Bastard!"

[ladyxskywalker]

lost without you, i & ii

Anakin Skywalker x F!Reader/OFC

a momentary separation between you & anakin happens while you are not feeling well. however, despite the circumstances, your hearts have only grown fonder of one another each time you speak on the phone. 💙

I wrote this a while ago & was kindly asked to repost it here on tumblr. also available to read on ao3. based on a real life situation. 🌼

i.

It's been weeks since you've been together. Something awful and truly beyond your control, forcing your current separation. A horrible flu making the rounds in your home world, where you - after attending a wedding, unfortunately, had come down with it as well.

"I confess, my love, I haven't been doing well without you." Anakin confides quietly in you, taking advantage of whispering in hushed tones over the phone.

"Anakin..."

"I know you're still recovering, but I can't help it, I'm selfish for you. I want you here...right now."

A softened sigh of your breath leaves your chest with a slight struggle, a cough escaping there, and a tear drop too.

"I will be back soon, I promise. Being without my other half has truly been unbearable."

"I just...I just want to hold you."

"You will again, soon enough. I promise."

But what you really meant to say, through the emotional heartbreak you've been facing is - yes, I know things have been difficult, I just hadn't realized that you'd been going through this just as much as I was.

"Will I, though?"

It hurts the most when his own mind leads him away from reality and the truth. Right away thinking or feeling like he'll never see you again. But the thoughts are only just intrusive ones, they have no real bearing on what lies in your heart.

"Yes."

Your head starts to feel too heavy, and your pillow is much too nice for you to even attempt getting up right now.

Sleep was inevitable. You hadn't been able to rest in days. Too nervous with worry to let your eyes close.

Too sad and unable to sleep without him all alone.

"This war...sometimes feels as though I am completely by myself, even though I know I'm not. I sense everything so strongly, it's harder than I thought."

"You need human contact. I understand that more than you know."

"Yes. I want it from you."

All while laying down, your cheeks have felt your eyes as they've already gone ahead into weeping. Another sort of instinct, telling you to finally let it all out.

"Tell me...what you miss...what you hope for most when eventually I do return."

Anakin pauses on his side of things, taking a breath before surrendering to his own heart.

"I just...I just want to be close to you."

"I want that too."

"I want to hug you for as long as I'm able to. Hold you in my arms while we sleep together in our room. Watch you smile at me from the door when you wake up. But..."

"But what, handsome?"

"The days...they're too long, too far."

After holding things in for so long, he begins to get a little bit choked up.

"I miss you, Anakin."

"I miss you too..."

So for now, all the two of you can do for one another is wait. A few more days for him to be home, and another stretch of time for you to start feeling better once more.

And then, there's a little static.

Background noise.

Another voice coming through over the phone.

"General Skywalker, there are enemy hostiles about. We should flank them on foot. Surround them."

"Good call, Commander. Lead the way, I won't be long."

You can almost picture his face in your mind then. A distance resonating in his eyes, veering off somewhere towards the setting suns, before looking back down.

Confident.

Brooding.

And, maybe even a little bit tired from it all.

"Go."

"I'll call you again tomorrow. And..."

"Hm?"

"I just want you to know, I'm not going anywhere."

Right then and there, even from across the airwaves, you sensed his light and the force of his love deep within your bones.

... 🌼

ii.

after being apart from one another for quite some time, anakin gives you a warm welcome home ❤️

this part is rated M or E for smut feel free to skip if this is not for you additional content tags: soft smut, couch time, sleepy morning intimacy, implied things happening, nothing crazy

It started with a long hug and a gentle hello. A smile for you, already gleaming with excitement as he greeted you by the door.

You were going to dinner that night. A fancy one he'd been planning for weeks for your birthday. Thoughtful gifts, wrapped with care, just needing to be opened. A release of kind breath, leaving the anxious state of your lungs then, because now - finally, all is well.

And you were home .

"Are you feeling better, sweetheart?"

"Mhmm."

He pulls you closer. Your hands, finding their way up to the back of his neck to feel his still wet hair from the shower.

Anakin hums, tracing the tip of his nose along your neck - leaning into it, enjoying the touch of your skin. The smell of your perfume that he loves so much.

"Do I look stupid?" He chuckles, all while holding you tighter to him.

"No. You're perfect."

"Good. Now go, open your gifts. You've waited long enough."

But for just a minute, you'd rather just take him all in there instead. To say how much you truly missed him while you were apart. That the greatest feeling in the world right now is knowing that Anakin is the best gift of all.

The night went by so fast. Laughing with each other first, then with friends...

Sneaking off somewhere for a while in a dark corner of the bar...

The softened shadows, encasing you both in their ease of surrounding comfort. And his hands, showing you the way toward his hips in front of everyone else, without a care in the world.

Your arms wrap around him easily.

His incredible blue eyes, focus on your lips.

Then your palms cup his face, completely letting go - falling on air immediately when he begins to kiss you hard.

"Want to get out of here?"

"Mm. Yes ."

"We don't need to be here anymore."

And so, you go.

"Come here."

He reaches for you to straddle him on the couch, insistent on his keys landing somewhere on the hard surface of his table below. Making a slightly abrupt noise that he knows someone else might have complained about...

But, he doesn't care where anything is supposed to go right now, and neither do you.

Not with the way you've been eyeing him sweetly from above...

Your shoes ending up someplace with his boots as they've already fallen over...

His belt buckle, already lost underneath his messy chair on the floor.

"I missed you. I thought...I thought you were never coming back. That, maybe you were gone for good."

Anakin caresses your face, brushing your cheek with care at the tips of all his fingers.

"You're my other half, I'd never leave you. Never..."

Anakin sighs, almost afraid to speak. Always brooding, so deep in thought.

"All those weeks...I couldn't bear it. I wasn't myself."

You kiss him slowly, slotting your lips together, chests pressing, getting even closer.

"I know."

Leaning down, you trace every line of his neck with kisses. Gripping the hems of his clothes. Shifting your hips against his, silently begging for him to help take them off.

But it's you that he wants first.

Completely vulnerable and bare on top of him.

Another hand, slipping between your thighs - teasing you with his strong and capable curling. Eliciting a budding sensation there that makes you moan.

The tip of his tongue, encircling the pebbled skin of your breasts, his eyes soothed to a close as he takes each one into his mouth.

"Yes... oh , please... please ."

Then, he grins, feeling that stray shiver he seems to know so well. Shifting you just the slightest for a second to take his pants off. Guiding your hand lower against his hardest part just to arrogantly show what you do to him.

"I want you. Right here ."

And as you lower yourself down upon him, it feels as though everything is made right again.

Affectionate sighs of impassioned relief, escaping there from you both...

Foreheads dipping into an almost blind surrender to the simplest form of selfish touch...

It took some time for you to drift off. The adrenaline and excitement of seeing and truly being with him again, almost feeling like too much.

He hums when he sleeps sometimes, sensing when occasionally your eyes tend to open - watching him. Closing them softly again when you know you've been caught.

You missed his bed. The smooth sheets. His warm pillows.

The broad span of his chest, and the cool feel of his arms.

Snuggling closely to him, you check the time. Looking across the room at towards the window, judging that by now it had already been morning. Your calming hint being the comforting light of the sun.

"Mm. I haven't slept at all..."

You whisper to yourself. Unable to fathom the last time you did something like this. Or that all of it had truly been real as well.

"There you are..."

Anakin slowly opens his eyes, allowing them to adjust.

"Morning, handsome."

Looking over, you see that all this time, the sheets have grown tighter. Sliding your hand beneath the warmth of your blankets to palm what lies beneath them. Though, before you know it, both he and you are no longer guarded by your covers.

"Where do you want me?"

You whisper, pressing each word against his waiting mouth.

His kiss, feeling like the only sort of sensual welcome you ever want to know.

Then, wordlessly, he takes you by the wrist, carefully and protectively, leading you back up and over where you belong.

Reaching around the hardened length of him, the pad of your thumb grazes over the smooth tip, before guiding it towards that sensitive spot. Letting go.

He kneads at your flesh, grasping at the skin of your thighs, rolling you forward, kissing you hard. His fingers, holding tightly to the back of your head. Freeing you only when you stretch, sitting back up. Your entire being, on passionate display for him there.

"I'm a lucky man..."

He smiles, all while mumbling a string of endless thoughts. Secrets from his mind that he's been keeping. Allusions to everything he loves about you, never spoken, always bottled up. Until this overwhelming moment.

Until, right now.

"You're a goddess... so beautiful..."

You can't help it when a single tear begins to fall, when you see his pure surrender to joy slipping with dampened eyelids of his own.

A rough hand then changing the scene...

Emotions running wild when a mere gentle moment turns into something else.

Your lips, pressed into momentary capture by the welcome feeling of his palm.

All you can do is watch him, as he's watching the joining spaces between you. The quickened pace that comes from the rolling of your hips. Your fingertips, toying with your own chest there...

And then he releases you. A moan escaping, then his shuddered breaths...

Another kiss...

Then one final glide.

Your blinding wave and loving fall, following his right after...

He's so warm, so safe like this. That when he eases you off of him, carefully making space for you to sleep next to him some more, you almost can't believe that you are really here with him now.

That you've almost spent four seasons of time with this amazing man.

That either one of you no longer had to fear the thought of being alone.

No universe exists where you would ever dream of being with someone else.

And you loved him.

... ❤️

thanks so much for reading 💌 xo A

[chrystal-ink]

Shadow x Fem Reader

Regency au part two Dream

No content warning in this one mostly just set up.

-Enjoy

Your carige ride home was spent in a dizzy haze your mind reeling from the events of the night. The excitement of your first ball and the sudden reappearance of your childhood friend had left your mind scattered and you needed to pick up the pieces.

You couldn't recall much after your dance with Shadow, just saying a simple goodbye before making your swift getaway into the crowd. Your mother, who had accompanied you that night, with her impeccable timing, was ready to retire for the evening meaning you didn't have to make up an excuse as to why you needed to leave before the ball was technically over.

Unfortunately your mother had seen you dance with the Viscount, and she was more than pleased.

"oh it is delightful that you two have reunited after all this time, and what a lovely couple you would make. I should invite him for tea, or perhaps dinner. Do you know what food he prefers? Perhaps I shall ask his mother maybe she will know. Do you know if he will call upon you tomorrow? Well he must with the way he was looking at you as you danced."

"Momma, perhaps you should hold off on planning the wedding until after I have secured a proposal." You interjected, tired of your mother's chatter.

"Oh come now darling, you know it is much too soon for him to propose, you must court him for two weeks at least." Your mother responded, completely missing your sarcasm. "I suppose if one is passionately in love an hour can feel like a lifetime, in which case a proposal may not be far away at all."

"Momma, tonight was the first time I've seen the Viscount in eight years largely because he has ignored me or any attempts I have made to rekindle our friendship. I sincerely doubt that he is in love with me. He mearly wants to make amends for his past actions."

"Well then he has apologized has he not?"

"No he has not."

"And would you accept said apology should he choose to do so?"

"I am not sure, that is the problem. He hurt me so deeply when he left I do not know if I have that kind of forgiveness in me."

"Well I'm sure both of you will come around eventually you were so close as children I doubt much has changed since then."

"Many things have changed since then, he is a viscount now he is responsible for his family's legacy one that has been tarnished no thanks to his cousin, not to mention he is a very high ranking member of the court, a court that could outs him over the slightest hint of scandal. He does not have time to worry about matters such as finding a wife let alone apologizing to me or anyone else he has wronged."

It hurt you to say those things but you knew it was true, it was by the grace of her majesty that the Robotnicks kept their place in society. Nobody knew why. rumors spread throughout the ton on the circumstances which allowed them to keep their ranking. Many thought it was bribery some said it was manipulation, others suggested an affair with the queen was what kept the Robotnick name safe from further scandal. You weren't sure which rumor was worse.

"Young lady the circumstances surrounding you two may have vastly changed, but your heart has remained as loving as ever, no matter how much you try to deny it. And as for the viscount if he is wise then he will apologize in due time, but only you can decide weather he is worth the forgiveness."

Your mother though odd in her own ways, always knew what you needed to hear even if you didn't necessarily want to hear it. Feelings had reamerged, ones that you had suppressed long ago, they were neglected and begged for attention, and they weren't going to leave you alone without a fight.

"Thank you Momma for the kind words, I wish to reflect in silence for the rest of the ride home."

"Of course my darling, try not to grow too worrisome you two have time to work things out."

The rest of the ride home was silent only the only sound that could be heard were the horses trotting guiding you and your mother home.

💎

Sleep did not come easily to you that night, your mind buzzing with questions.

Why should Shadow reappear now of all times?

Could it have anything to do with your coming out this year?

What has he been up to for all these years?

What is this mysterious fluttering in your chest, and why do you only feel it when you think of him?

Your mind flipped rapidly through these questions until a restless slumber overtook you.

💎

You were back at the ball, only it was different this time. The crowd around you was replaced with an eerie emptiness. Your dance card had only one slot on it and Shadow's name took it's place.

The music began and he was nowhere to be seen. You ran about the ballroom calling his name but he could not be found. Finally you collapsed on the floor in despair tears falling from your eyes and crashing onto the dancefloor.

Suddenly you felt a warm presence around you. It drew you into it's embrace and held onto you as you sobbed.

The presence whispered in you ear. "No need to cry now, I'm here, I will always be here, no matter how much time has passed, I promise I will not leave you again."

You turned to the presence unable to make out it's face until it reached out a hand to dry your tears.

"Shadow"

He didn't respond in words he just looked into your eyes as he removed his gloves placing his bare hand on your cheek. Instinctively you leaned into his warm gentle touch leaning closer and closer to his face until your lips were mere centimeters from touching.

You gasped immediately torn out of your dream and into reality. Your heart was racing as though you had been running and a cold sweat had seeped through your nightgown.

The morning sun had begun to peak through your curtains as you steadied yourself. Slowing your breath you had only one thought that went through your head.

What on earth was that?

Before you had time to absorb the shock of your dream your mother and your ladies maid burst into your bedroom.

"Good morning my dear, you shouldn't be in bed at this late hour, not when there is so much to do today! Lilly be a dear and draw her a bath will you she looks completely disheveled from last night."

"Yes madam" Lilly said before quietly leaving to get your bath prepared.

"Oh darling there is so much to do we are woefully under prepared for this season and we didn't even know it, we will be taking gentlemen callers in two hours, after that we must go to the modiste to get you a new wardrobe, and then we shall promenade with the Rose family this afternoon after tea."

"Mother we just bought me a new wardrobe for the season why must we return to the modiste, how many more dresses could I possibly need."

"It appears that the reemergence of the Viscount has been proven to be quite beneficial to you, we have been receiving invitations all morning. Balls, Banquets, Teas, all sorts of events all wanting you. And then this arrived."

Your mother handed you a copy of the Ton's gossip column. You heart began to race again as you read the words.

"Queen Elise pronounces miss Y/N L/N as her diamond of the season"

[kingofmyheart-19]

Begin Again - Chapter 1

***thinking about posting my wattpad stuff here too, starting the first chapter of this book.

Six months prior - Mack's POV

I'm getting Riley ready for bed when my phone rings from the other room.

I look at my watch.

She's late again.

"Mommy? Where momma?" Riley asks me sadly.

"She had work, baby. She will see you in the morning."

She leans in and kisses my cheek, "Okay."

I scoop her up and kiss her cheek, "We love you. So much."

I set her in her crib and turn on her sound machine and then hit the light.

"Night night, mommy!"

I sigh, "Night night, baby."

I close her door and walk to the next room, "Max, come here, boy."

Our big yellow lab runs into the room and hops onto the bed.

I grab my phone and see two missed calls.

Ally.

I push her contact and it quickly gets picked up.

"Hello." A man's voice answers.

"Uh, hello? Who is this?" I ask, concerned.

"Is this the spouse of Allison Hughes?" He asks.

I gulp, "Y-yes? What is going on? Where is my wife?"

Silence.

"Mrs. Hughes? My name is Dr. Snyder, I was your wife's trauma doctor today."

My heart drops.

"What? Where is my wife?" I ask and stand up.

"Your wife was in a terrible accident. She came into my trauma bay and we performed CPR for 30 minutes, but her injuries were too extensive."

I stop pacing.

"No. Where is my wife? I want to talk to her! She-she was on her way home, albeit, late, but she was on her way!"

"Mrs. Hughes, your wife passed away about 30 minutes ago. We were unable to save her. I am so sorry." He says.

My brain is unable to compute what is actually happening.

"We have a two-year-old." Is the only phrase I can say.

"I'm so sorry, Mrs. Hughes. We will need you to come down to the hospital. It's a formality."

I stare at the bed and feel tears running down my cheeks.

I see the photo of us on our wedding day and when Riley was born.

"Fuck. Okay. I understand. I'll be there, what hospital?"

"UC San Diego Medical Center."

I hang up and rub my face.

'This can't be fucking real. It just can't be.'

I go to my contacts and click the name.

"Hey dude! What's going on?"

"Lauren?" I sniffle.

"Whoa. What's wrong? You and Ally okay?"

The mention of Ally makes me cry harder.

"Shit. This is bad. I'm coming over."

She hangs up and I sink to the floor.

'What am I going to do?'

Present

"Riley! Don't go too far, okay?" I call out.

"Won't, mommy!"

I look out at the ocean and sigh. I look down at my wedding rings that I can't take off.

'I miss you so much, babe.'

I look back up and try to locate Riley, but can't.

"Riley?" I call.

I feel my heart rate increase and call again, "Riley!"

"Mommy, I'm here!"

I whip around and see Riley run up with another girl.

I kneel down and hug her, "You scared me, baby."

"Right here, mommy." She says.

I pull back, "Who's your friend?"

She smiles, "This is Charlie!"

I smile, "Hi, Charlie."

"Hi! My momma is over here!" She says and bolts away.

I watch as she comes back, pulling a woman.

"Whoa, Charlie!" She says.

"Momma! This is Riley, my new friend! And this is her mommy!"

I smile and stand up, "Hi. I'm Mack."

She smiles and I feel butterflies in my stomach.

"Alex. Nice to meet you. Looks like these two are thick as thieves." She laughs.

I nod, "Looks like it."

"Can we go play?" Charlie asks.

"Yeah mommy, can we?" Riley pleads.

"Sure, but we have to go in 10, yeah?"

She nods and runs off with Charlie.

"She's cute, how old?" Alex asks.

"She's 3. What about Charlie?"

She smiles, "She just turned three too."

I nod, "Nice. We will have to exchange numbers so they can have play dates."

She smiles wider, "Totally."

We continue talking when I look at my phone.

"I'm so sorry, but we have to go. Riley, come on!"

She runs over, "Time to see momma?"

I smile sadly, "Yeah, baby. Just like always."

She nods, "Bye, Charlie! See you soon?"

Charlie nods and hugs her, "Yeah!"

I see a look in Alex's eyes, but it quickly changes, "Here's my number."

I grab it from her and nod, "Thank you. I'll text you."

She bobs her head, "Great. Bye!"

I wave and we walk to the car, getting in.

We pull into the cemetery and I park.

"Mommy?"

I sigh, "Yeah, baby?"

"When can momma come home from the cemetery?"

I feel my eyes fill with tears and sigh, getting out of the car.

I open the back door and get her out of her seat, setting her on the ground and kneeling.

"Ry, momma isn't coming home from the cemetery. She died, remember? Her body stopped working and she went to heaven." I say sadly.

She looks down and nods, "Lots of flowers."

I smile, "So many flowers, just like momma liked."

She sighs, "Go talk to momma, now?"

"Yeah, let's go."

She runs ahead and I look up.

'She misses you so much.'

Alex POV - later that week

"Earth to Alex! I'm telling you a story!"

I turn and see Taylor, "Sorry. Zoned out."

"What about? How your divorce with Serv is almost done with?"

I sigh, "No, but also thanks for the reminder."

She chuckles, "It's a good thing. Then you can be free to do what you want or really who you want."

I smile and shake my head, "You're ridiculous."

"Now that you're like settled on the whole being with a woman thing, we have to find you a lady!" She exclaims.

I sigh, "Oh my god."

"Come on! Let's go to the gay bar." She says, pushing my shoulder.

My eyes widen, "I have a three year old. No one wants my baggage."

She sighs, "Dude, you're a catch. Charlie is adorable. Also helps that you're a ridiculously famous soccer player."

I chuckle, "Maybe. I don't want to date another player though."

"Okay. But we will find you someone." She says.

"Sure."

I stand up and walk out of the locker room.

I get to my car and stare at my phone.

'That woman never texted me. Charlie's been asking about Riley.'

I sigh and head towards Charlie's school.

I pull in the parking lot and Mack crosses my mind again.

I shake my head.

'She had a ring on, Alex. Get a grip.'

Mack POV -

The bell rings and I smile, "Alright guys, that's the bell! I'll see you all next week!"

I watch as my high schoolers quickly clamber to get out of my classroom.

I turn and sit at my desk, starting to grade papers.

I glance up and see the photo of Ally and I with Riley, one month before she died.

I sigh and sit back.

"Knock knock, buddy! Time for the weekend!" Lauren waltzes in.

I look at her and smile, "Yup!"

"Let's go out tonight." She says and leans on my desk.

I stare at her and shake my head, "Riley is still having a hard time during bedtime without Ally."

She sighs, "You need a break. Call your mom, she can come watch Ry."

I look down, "I'm really missing her, Laur."

"I know you are, which is why you need a break. Let's go out, get a few beers, nothing crazy, you'll be home by 11. Ally would want you to take a break." She says.

I look back up at her, "Alright. I'll text my mom."

She pats my back, "It'll get better, I promise."

I bob my head, "Okay. I need to go get Riley."

"See you at 8."

She walks out and I lean back, looking up.

"Send me a sign, babe. I don't want to go on without you, but it's hard."

I close my eyes and sigh.

I gather my stuff and head to my car, going to get Riley.

I pull up to her preschool and smile when I see her running out on the playground.

'She's so much like her.'

I get out and she sees me, "Mommy!"

I jog over and pick her up, kissing her cheek.

"Hi my little love!"

"Hi Mrs. Hughes! Can we chat real quick?" Riley's teacher asks.

I nod, "Go play a little more."

I watch as Riley runs off and turn to her teacher.

"What's going on? Everything okay with Riley?" I ask.

She nods, "Yeah, just she's having a hard time napping and has been acting out a little bit."

"Acting out, how?" I inquire.

She sighs, "She's shoving kids, not sharing, wants to be by herself, which as you know, is not like her."

I shake my head, "It's not. She's been struggling with losing Ally."

She nods sadly, "I agree. I really think it'd be beneficial to have her see a social worker."

My eyes widen.

"I know that sounds scary, but you're an educator, you know the importance of getting the right supports in place." She says gently.

I think about it and let out a breath, "I know you're right. I'm just worried, she sleeps with me every night."

She nods, "We will support you guys just like we have been."

I nod, "Thank you, see you Monday."

"Come on, Ry!"

She skips over and grabs my hand.

We walk to the car and get in, "Okay, baby. Tonight, grandma is going to stay with you for a few hours. I'll tuck you in, but mommy is going to go out for a few hours with Auntie Lauren."

She shakes her head, "No, mommy! What if something happens!"

I sigh, "Nothing will happen. I'll see you in the morning. You'll be safe with grandma. Maybe she will even give you ice cream before sleep."

Her eyes well up and she nods, "Promise you'll come home?"

"Promise."

Alex POV

"Okay, let's get a drink!" Taylor yells.

We walk to the bar and I lean on it.

"Hey. What's your name?"

I turn and see a gorgeous blonde staring at me.

I smile, "Hi, I'm Alex."

"Elise."

"Nice to meet you." I say.

"Can I buy you a drink?"

I nod and am about to speak when someone bumps into me.

"I am so sorry. Jesus, I should really watch where I am-"

"Mack?" I ask.

She looks up at me, "Uh- Alex? Hi! What are- what are you doing here?"

I chuckle, "Same thing as you."

She stares at me and shakes her head, "Can I buy you a drink?"

I smile widely and nod.

"But-" Elise starts.

I turn to her, "I'm so sorry, but i know this one. Thanks for offering though."

She scoffs and walks off.

"Did I interrupt something?" Mack asks.

I shake my head, "No."

"Mack! The hell? You just wander off and now you're with some hot chick!"

My eyes widen.

"Holy. Are you her wife? I am so sorry, but I promise this is not what it looks like."

Her eyes widen, "Am I her- oh no. Just best friend."

Mack sighs and I notice her demeanor change.

"Lauren, what's your name?" The woman asks.

"I'm Alex. Our kids met at the park the other day." I say.

She smiles, "Oh, nice."

Mack is lost in thought and her friend nudges her.

She looks up, "Riley met her daughter at the park."

"We established that, idiot. You know what? I'm going to go find our crew. You'll catch up?"

Mack nods.

Lauren walks away, "So, you promised me a drink."

She smiles, "I did. Let's go out on the patio though."

We grab drinks and walk outside, which is way quieter.

We sit and I stare at her.

'She's so damn cute."

I shake my head.

"So, where's your wife?" I ask.

She looks down at her hand and sighs.

"I know you see these rings and that's why you ask."

I look at her confusedly.

She lets out another breath, "Alex, my wife died six months ago."

'What?'

[tomtenadia]

Detours to You - 30

Hello..

Here we are...this is the next to last chapter.

MASTERLIST

“Our son, he is coming.”

Rowan hung up and set the car in motion. His heart raced. He was about to become a dad. A ray of light in a very dark day.

Due to a hefty section of the city centre being closed, the traffic was now hellish and progress slowly. His phone rang again and he activated it via the bluetooth command on his wheel “Ae?”

“Where are you?” She sounded better and he relaxed.

“Stuck in traffic but coming. How are you?”

“In a fuckload of pain, but our boy is fine.”

“How far along?”

“Doc says six centimetres, you still have time, chief.”

“I think I know a shortcut, I will see you soon. Love you.”

His job had him driving a lot around the city and with time he had learned a lot of shortcuts. And this one allowed him to arrive at the hospital in a shorter time than anticipated. 

At the hospital he bolted out of the car and ran for the maternity ward. At the reception the charge nurse gave him a glare and then he realised why. He was a mess, his face still dirty, same for his hands and neck. Of course they did not want him in such state in a place where there were newborns. He ran back to his car where he kept a change of uniform and then used one of the bathroom to get cleaned up and a bit more presentable. His hair was still darker then usual but he just placed his head under the sink and hoped for the best tying his hair in a man-bun.

Finally he got to Aelin’s room and saw her sitting on a yoga ball, with an IV attached her hand and Lys and Elide keeping her company.

“You are here.”

He kneeled and kissed her.

“You stink of smoke.”

Rowan let out a chuckle “I only had time to change in the hospital bathroom. This requires a shower.” He then turned to Elide “Lorcan is fine, but I would go home to him, this call was a lot for everyone.”

Elide looked at Aelin and she nodded “Go, I am fine, Rowan is here,” she turned to Lys “you too. Go home, relax. We will call you when you are an aunt.”

When they were alone, Rowan sat on the chair opposite to her and Aelin noticed the deep wariness in the lines on his face “we called my parents and your mum and Maya is with her.”

“How are you?” He caressed her face.

“This ball is amazing and it’s helping with some of the pain.”

Rowan moved at her back and started massaging the spot that he knew she loved. The sounds that left Aelin’s mouth were not for a public audience.

“Fireheart, they might think we are having sex.”

A grin spread on her face “an orgasm releases the happy hormone that might help my pain.”

Rowan’s ears turned red “Aelin I don’t think it’s appropriate.”

“Squeeze a boob? I know you love them.”

He sighed and kneeled behind her and his arm sneaked around her waist holding the belly. His mouth traced lazy circles on her neck and nibbled at her favourite spot behind the ear. She leaned back against him, then his hand travelled up and cupped a breast hiding under the hospital gown and Aelin moaned.

He then smacked a kiss on her neck and stood “I am starving, am I okay if I go downstairs and grab something? I have not eaten since this morning.”

Aelin stood and wore her gown “I am coming too.”

“Are you sure?”

“Walking is good.” She grabbed her IV and attached it to the carrier then grabbed his arm and slowly they walked down to the cafeteria.

Aelin snacked on some of his fries and inhaled the scent of coffee. She missed it.

By the time they got back to the room they were both exhausted. Rowan collapsed heavily on the chair and Aelin covered him with a blanket “rest a bit, you had a long day.”

“I can’t.”

“You will hear me screaming when it’s time, I am sure.”

But Rowan never managed to fall asleep. He brought the chair closer to the bed, grabbed her hand and placed it on his heart. He told her what happened, he felt bad at spoiling her day with such a sad story but he needed to unburden his soul. He needed her. 

It was in the middle of the night when she patted his hand nervously “Rowan…”

“What is it?”

“He is coming.”

He ran outside and called for the doctor who, after a few checks, confirmed that yes, Aelin was ten centimetres and ready to deliver. He followed to the delivery room and was given a set of scrubs to wear on his clothes and then stood at her side “I am here, fireheart.” He kissed her forehead while she screamed in pain.

The doctor moved in-between her legs and told her that the baby was already crowning.

“Chief, come and see your son.”

Rowan stared at Aelin and she nodded so he moved and gasped when he saw the head.

“I can see him, fireheart.”

Aelin pushed and pushed and Rowan watched his son slowly be born.

The doctor took the infant away and he walked back to an exhausted Aelin “you are amazing,” a kiss “Aelin that was…”

“Buzzard, are you crying?”

He shrugged “he is here.” 

She looked up at him and her heart melted at seeing him weep.

In the distance they heard the infant cry “that is a good sign.”

A moment later the nurse placed the bundle in Aelin’s arms and Rowan sat at her side “he’s beautiful.”

“And still a bit gross.” Aelin kissed the baby’s head “we do good babies, Whitethorn.”

“Wonder if he has your eyes.”

“I read it will take a while before it settles,” he added using the info he had read in all of his babies books.

“Maya was a shade of green already at birth and then it settled in you pine green.”

As if he heard them, their son opened his eyes and looked up “they are quite light. Hopefully they will be blue.”

Rowan kissed her head “anything, my love.”

“Do you want to go to your dad?” She passed him the baby and Rowan’s heart raced. He had missed all of that with Maya, but now he was going to be present in all the milestones of his son. Witnessing his first moments had been the experience of a lifetime.

“Hi you, I am your dad.”

Aelin stared at Rowan talking to their son and felt emotions well up at the image. Rowan was meant to be a dad.

He walked back and passed the child back ���I am not supposed to take him away from you too long, skin on skin with the mother is important.”

Aelin took his hand “the father too.”

The nurse joined them a moment later, “have we settled on a name?

“Thomas,” said Rowan.

“Thomas, Alasdair Whitethorn-Galathynius.”added Aelin.

Rowan stared at her in disbelief.

“And I have the documents ready to change Maya’s surname legally to Whitethorn-Galathynius too.”

“I love you.” Was all that Rowan managed.

*

Once Aelin was back in her room, Rowan had started the round of calls and to fill his phone with his son’s pictures.

His mother with Maya and the Galathynius had been the first visitors. 

Maya stormed in the room claiming that she was a big sister and wanted to see her brother. Rowan removed her shoes and placed her on the bed “Maya, meet Thomas.”

“Thomas, meet your big sister Maya.”

The girl leaned forward and kissed the boy “mama he smells nice.”

“Do you want to hold him?” Maya looked at her father in surprise.

Rowan moved behind her “sit down properly on the bed,” he helped her and showed her how to bend her arms and then he passed her her brother, always keeping a hand nearby to hover.

His mum stared at the image in front of her and took pictures at the same time.

Rowan looked at her and he knew where her thoughts had gone, because he was thinking about the same thing. His father should have been there to witness that moment and all of a sudden the pain of his loss came back for a brief visit. But luckily his daughter’s squeals of happiness brought him back.

Rowan then took his son from his sister’s arms and walked to his mother “mum, please meet Thomas Alasdair.”

A sob escaped Eiddwen’s lips and took her grandson “hello, mo chridhe. I am your grandma and I will love you so very much.”

The Galathynius arrived later “sorry it took us so long, the traffic is a nightmare.”

And Rowan for a moment remembered why and darkness threatened to resurfaced but as he stared at his son and daughter he managed to push the pain away.

“It might be a while before it gets fixed.” He added flatly and Aelin grabbed his hand.

“Is this our grandson?”

“Nana have you seen my brother?”

Evalin and Rhoe moved to Aelin “oh he is gorgeous.” She took him from his mother hands and cooed at the baby “and what’s your name, my love?”

“Thomas Alasdair,” added Rowan proudly and Evalin stared at both of them “it’s perfect.”

“Have you told Lys and Elide?”

Rowan lifted his phone and showed the video of Lys dancing in the living room and celebrating being an aunt.

Aelin and Rowan enjoyed the celebrations until the nurse took their son away claiming that it was time for his nap. Maya protested saying that she wanted to stay with her brother but they had to explain her that he was very little and had to rest.

Eventually they left and Eiddwen took Maya with her.

Rowan remained behind and sat on Aelin’s bed and she caressed his face “you should go home too, you are tired.” His forehead leaned against hers “No, I am staying.”

“Ro, please, I need you fully rested. We have two kids now.”

He chuckled “Okay, but I am back tomorrow morning.”

“We will be waiting for you.”

Rowan kissed her deeply “I love you. You are my everything, Aelin. You and our two children.”

Aelin pulled him closer. She could feel his residual pain and it broke her heart than on such a joyous days he could not be fully happy “you make me happy too, chief.”

Rowan gave her a last kiss and stood.

“Drive safe, please.”

He nodded and left.

The drive home had taken a while. He had received a call from the commissioner explaining that during overhaul they had discovered water infiltrations that had weakened the structure in the long run and the vibrations of the rails had worsened the structure. It had been a disaster waiting to happen and now an investigation had been opened. 

Rowan finally got home. In the house he took in the unusual silence and it upset him. He was now so used to constantly hear the voices of his girls that the silence brought him back to a time when he was alone. Slowly, he climbed upstairs and got changed, then he dragged his tired body in Maya’s room and stared at it. The were some clothes abandoned on the bed so he placed away and then a chuckle left him when he spotted a skate peeking out from under the bed. Rowan grabbed her hockey kit and stored it away. He and Aelin had been trying hard to teach her to be tidy, but in that sense Maya was just as messy as her mum. With a smile on his face he finished clearing up and then he left, closing the door behind him. 

A few steps down the corridor and Rowan reached a new room waiting for them. He had finished it just a few weeks before. They had gone for a pastel green theme. The crib had a mobile hanging over it with fairy creatures attached to it. Maya had chosen it. He took out his phone and stared at some of the pictures of his son and his heart swelled with love. It had taken a while but he was finally on track to have the family he had dreamt and at his side the love of his life.

taglist

@rowaelinismyotp @swankii-art-teacher @whimsicallyreading @elentiyawhitethorn @aelin-bitch-queen @bruiseonthefaceofhumanity  @mis-lil-red @thegreyj @sailorsassley @leiawritesstories @clairec79 @morganofthewildfire @sv0430 @heartless--aromantic @autumnbabylon @rowanaelinn  @susumaus98  @gracie-rosee @mybloodrunsblue @tanvee1231 @avenrebekah @whoever-you-choose-to-love  @theywillnotsingforme @universallytreepost @black-daisy-water @goddess-aelin @whispers-in-the-darkest-heart @lovely-dove-zee @athena127 @mariaofdoranelle

[lily-blue]

I look at you like you're perfect for me

☆ characters: half-dark elf!theo & you ☆ genre: dark fantasy au, soulmate au ☆ warnings: mention of blood, violence and death, manipulation, slight mention of self-hatred ☆ summary: having a soulmate sounds like a fairy tale, doesn’t it? too bad that yours could have been easily written by one of grimm brothers or the queen of dark fairy tales, @dat-town herself ☆ words: 11,2k ☆ also: just like every year, this soulmate au was written for my own soulmate, kathy ♥ the tenth year of our friendship brought along a lot of changes; and i’m immensely happy to know that there is no such thing in our relationship as too much distance between the two of us. thank you for sticking by my side through all these years, starting from my super awkward high school years, and please, stay with me for five times this many (and even more) ♥

There had been a time when you had hated yourself for being born the way you were: without magic. However, shortly after your twentieth birthday, when the Dark Elves came knocking on your door, this rare deficiency - that less than one hundredth percent of the population had the misfortune to experience -, was what allowed you to survive when your village went up in smoke. You see, your people lived in one of the most lavish and dense forests of the Northern Kingdom. Even with magic running through your community’s veins, you stood no chance against the flames. Many died before they could have even thought about running.

Not that abandoning their roots helped a lot of people. Because the Dark Elves were ruthless just as the stories suggested and killed everyone who bumped into them on their way towards the border of your village. Gender or age… neither of those mattered. Once they sensed your spiritual core, the magical energy deep in your soul, there was a target on your back and their soldiers never missed aim.

The bile was burning your throat when you heard yet another body fall on the ground with a loud thud a few steps from behind you, but you willed yourself and kept running. This time the screams were louder; they came from a lot closer and it terrified you. The implication that you would be the next.

However, that arrow, you were so sure was meant to pierce through your heart, never came. It was as though they couldn’t see you. As though you were completely invisible in the open while people who tried their best to lay low lost their lives due to their stalling. You couldn’t grasp what was happening around you, but to be honest, you didn’t have time or spare energy to ponder over the reasons and theories. You needed to get as far from the chaos as possible before your weak legs gave up.

You had never been too athletic. You were driven by your sheer will to survive.

You weren’t sure how long it would take to get away from the stomach-churning screams and the distinct sound of wood burning; however, you had to be a lot deeper in the forest than you had ever been in because the awaited sense of safety didn’t embrace you as soon as you entered the realm of Mother Nature. You had to keep running. You had to keep moving forwards even when your feet hurt and your lungs begged for a break.

You didn’t stop until your body was physically incapable of moving. And then… Then, you crawled behind a thick trunk to placate your aggressively beating heart. 

The Sun was already peeking through the trees by the time you more or less managed to regulate your breathing and came up with a semi-well-thought-out plan. Obviously, as much as you wanted to see your family, you couldn’t have just gone back to your village to look for other survivors. You didn’t have any weapon on you to fight your way though an army, any experience in close combat other than those playful fist fights you had occasionally had with your neighbors or magic to rely on against other magical creatures. If the Dark Elves were still around, you would have died the moment you set foot in your home.

However, your chances might not have been that horrible if you hadn’t been alone. If you had had other people backing you up while fighting back against the Dark Elves. Therefore, what your next move should have been was clear: you had to find the nearest village and see what was going on there. Had they been spared by the monsters who had chosen the most peaceful moment of the night to destroy your home? Had they been already slaughtered? Would they have been the next victims of their conquest?

Either way, you had no time to waste.

So despite the tiredness in your bones that became more significant after the adrenaline left your body and the minor injuries you had obtained during your escape, you pushed yourself into a standing position and headed east. You had never visited any of the neighboring farms and villages before, but you were a regular at the market, so you had met many vendors from the area. You had heard stories about their families, about their lifestyles and homes, hence you knew where to start looking for people who might have actually been willing to lend you a helping hand. There should have been hunters on the other side of this forest who would have felt for you and your family. They were more empathetic than lone farmers around the western regions.

Following the Sun, grateful for its guidance, it was easier to disregard the pain in your feet, caused by the cuts and bruises on your bare soles, than you would have initially thought. You had never been a warrior, after all. What wasn’t easy to shut out, however, was the grumbling of your stomach and the feeling of emptiness in your gut. When was the last time you had eaten? You were pretty sure you hadn’t skipped dinner last night, so why? Why was your body demanding food so desperately while numbing the pain?

Your mind was switching between daydreaming about your mother’s roasted sweet potatoes and the pictures of your loved ones falling on the cold ground like sacks of rice, hence in no time, you felt like you could have thrown up the minute your mouth touched anything edible. You were so damn hungry, but all the death and suffering that lingered in your mind made it hard to digest that you were still alive. Why were you still alive?

Your steps faltered then came to an immediate stop when the unmistakable sound of horses trotting somewhere in front of you registered in your brain. Your heart was in your throat as you looked around in panic, trying to find a place where you could have hidden. A bush that was dense enough to hide your figure, a hollow in one of the thicker trees, a branch low enough for you to use as leverage, so that you could climb on the top. Something. Anything.

In the end, you did come across a branch that you could reach on your tiptoes, so you quickly ran towards it and used your momentum and the sturdy trunk underneath your feet to aid your above-the-average muscles. You pulled yourself up on the tree and hugged the trunk in hope of blending into your surroundings. 

A voice inside of your head - a gentle yet teasing tone akin to your beloved older sister’s - scolded you for breathing too loudly and staring in the direction of possible danger, so you swallowed down your fears, willed your body to comply and closed your eyes like your father had taught you during the first and last hunt he had taken you on. You remembered how ridiculous he had sounded to you when he had told you and Nobara that every creature could feel it when they were being watched. You, for that matter, had never experienced such a thing during any of your hide-and-seeks with your friends, but your sister had paid a lot of attention to your father’s instructions, so you had mimicked her serious expression.

Despite your best efforts, your father had never taken you on a hunt after that one occasion. For months, you had been sulking, convinced that it had been because he could have seen the skepticism in your eyes. Later, your sister had told you that he had only been worried about you because at that moment he had realized that you truly couldn’t sense other creatures’ watchful eyes without magic.

Life without magic had always sucked.

The tingles came unexpectedly. At first, it was as though tiny needles were pricking on your skin, but later, as your rational thoughts resurfaced, you realized that was hardly possible. So you thought the sensation came from tiny insects creeping under your clothes, and you prayed that they weren’t poisonous. You were without your loved ones, you felt miserable for sure, but that didn’t mean you wanted to follow them to the afterlife in case they were already six feet under.

You gulped and resisted the urge to lift your hand and scratch your nape. You willed yourself not to open your eyes.

However, as the seconds ticked by, it became significantly harder to stay still. You had never been a hyperactive person - you loved spending time at home, helping your mom and reading in the barn or on the field -, but at that moment, there was this slowly growing urge inside of you that made you want to reveal your hiding place. It encouraged you to climb off the tree, and it scared you how your nails had to dig into the trunk consciously, so that you wouldn’t have given in to this irrational temptation.

‘Keep heading west. I’ll catch up with you,’ you could hear one of the riders send away the rest, making you wonder what his reason could have been for both staying behind and staying alone without any backup.

You wanted to sneak a peek at him so much. Your hands were trembling as you held onto the tree desperately. What was wrong with you? Deluding yourself into thinking that you were out of harm’s way just because he was alone was the worst thing you could have done. This rider could have easily been one of those who had attacked your village the previous night.

Your arms jerked and your hands let go of the trunk when something big and warm landed on your shoulder. You could have pinpointed the exact moment you lost your footing and your body fell forwards, then towards the cold ground underneath.

You could phantom the pain that was surely about to come with the collision, but you did not feel the crash. Instead, your bare feet touched the grass gently like you had been floating on your way down and your balance was supported by two strong arms that enveloped your torso. Those palms that appeared on your hips were big and warm. Familiar in a way you had a hard time to explain.

‘Aren’t you gonna open your eyes, little one?’ The same rider asked you with a pinch of playfulness to his voice that immediately disarmed you despite your better judgment. A part of you was still aware that you knew nothing about this person. Your concerns and worries and fears were still there, somewhere in the back of your head. They just didn’t seem to reach you when you needed your survival instincts, your defenses the most. 

Why else would you have called him out on the nickname he had chosen for you instead of on how he had sneaked up on you and endangered your life.

‘I’m not little,’ you sulked, linking your arms in front of your chest, which later you realized was only proving him right. You acted like a little girl, but you couldn’t have decided whether it had been already too late to back out. Should you have held your chin higher or let your arms fall back by your sides?

Indecisive, you let your body posture stay the way it was, but stopped pouting to lessen the spoiled brat attitude.

‘U-hum,’ the lone rider hummed out, taunting you with a pout similar to the one you had just abandoned and simultaneously urging you to fight back. However, you didn’t have any good retort and even if you had had any, the words would have stuck in your throat the moment your eyes met his ash gray orbs. He looked breathtakingly beautiful.

Inhuman. 

‘Like what you see, little one?’ The rider teased, and that alone would have earned a scoff from you if you had been able to close your mouth while you were taking in his appearance.

The boy didn’t look older than twenty-three; his complexion was pale as though his face was lit up by the Moon even in daylight. He had fair hair that fell into his face and ears as sharp as needle ice. He was an elf. There was no question about it and yet, your feet made no attempt at putting the well-needed distance between you two.

‘Are you without a horse?’ His more reasonable question pulled you out of your head and you nodded on instinct, although admitting that you had no means getting away from him might have been a mistake.

It seemed like you were making one poor decision after another in this stranger’s company. Who was he anyway? And why did it feel like he was someone important to you whom you should have kept close?

‘Are you heading west?’

‘East,’ the truth fell from your lips easily as if you weren’t in control of your own actions, and in a world where magic was more common than people without power, the possibility shouldn’t have been brushed off as quickly as you had just done so. It was just… as soon as the thought could have formed in your mind, your heart rejected it without hesitation.

‘Do you mind if I take you to the nearest village? The forest isn’t the safest place right now,’ the rider reasoned and a part of you wanted to ask how he knew that the area was dangerous, but before you could have parted your lips, he had already taken your silence as a permission to touch you.

The boy’s palm was warm against your skin; his fingers fit around your wrist like a bracelet. Your body followed him towards his horse with minor protest. You didn’t come back to your senses until you were standing in front of the mighty animal and your company took his hand off you to fix the saddle, so the horse could carry the both of you.

‘I… I didn’t say that I’d go with you.’ You took a step backwards. You still didn’t sound too eager to turn your back on him, but it was a baby step towards the right direction.

Why did you have to remind yourself that you didn’t know him? You knew that you had no idea who he was and what his intentions were with you. You were completely in the dark regarding his reason for sending the rest of his group away and you were also unaware whether he had known about your presence when he had done that. 

Not to mention that he was an elf. That in itself should have been a good enough reason for you to run in the opposite direction. Yet, you stood in one place, with your chin held up high. Your breath hitched when your eyes met for the second time.

‘You didn’t say you don’t want me to take you there, either,’ the elf exclaimed, his smug grin both annoying and charming - a thought you would have liked to bury deep in your mind, so you could have never accidentally blurted it out. ‘You want to stay here alone?’

You didn’t. You didn’t want to be alone.

‘You’re an elf. My village has been destroyed by elves,’ you forced the words through your gritted teeth as you simultaneously fought the tears in your eyes. You shouldn’t have shown weakness in front of a stranger. You shouldn’t have cried and mourned your family when you hadn’t known for sure that they were gone. They might have made it. Just because your sister had told you to run and she had stayed behind, it didn’t mean that she had failed to find a way out of the chaos. 

You didn’t notice that you had balled your fists or that your arms were trembling due to your frustration and anger until your eyes fell on the rider’s face and you noted that he was staring at your hands. You relaxed your fingers immediately.

‘Did I destroy your village?’ He asked a tad tentatively and you gulped when you picked up on the sadness in his voice. You hadn’t meant to offend him. Yet, it was hard to convince yourself that if he had seen the shoe fit, it had been absolutely on him.

You felt like an asshole.

‘I mean… I don’t know for sure,’ you mumbled under your nose, looking at everything but him, so the unexpected tightness in your chest would have eased up a little. ‘Did you?’

The rider scoffed, but didn’t call you out on the bluntness of your question or the rudeness of the implication behind your words. Instead, he took a step further from his horse to encourage you to climb on the animal.

You bit into your cheek from the inside, waiting.

‘I’ve just arrived from the east with my group,’ he stated, his words aligning with what you had seen and heard mere minutes ago. The noises had indeed come from that direction, while your home had been located in the opposite way. Even on horseback, it sounded unreasonable that they would have taken such a huge detour just to get ahead of you and fool you.

Without magic, you were no match for their kind.

You looked down at your bare feet littered in cuts and bruises, then shifted your gaze to the horse. It would have been a lie to say it wasn’t tempting; however, letting the elf take you to anywhere was really the good choice?

‘Are you a dark elf?’ Another blunt question, another wave of guilt that washed over you the moment the last word had left your mouth. Since when had you been so concerned about a stranger’s feelings when your safety was at risk? He could have been as easily related to the monsters who had killed your people as…

‘I’m a half-elf.’

You sank your teeth deeper into your flesh. The pain in your body had been bearable before. Your feet had been numb and your wounds superficial. You could have made it to the other side of the woods on your own. A part of you was even determined to do so, so why… Why were your feet dragging you towards the horse?

‘Good girl,’ the rider complimented you when you climbed on the horse on your own, then got on the animal behind you, keeping you stable with his arms around your body.

You swallowed down your nerves.

You tried to swallow down your nerves.

Surprisingly, the journey towards the closest village was spent in calming silence. The only sounds breaking the tranquility were one of Mother Nature: the light breeze playing with the withering leaves, the foliage getting crushed underneath the horse’s hoofs, mosquitos and other insects buzzing into your ears. 

In hindsight, you should have picked up on the telltale signs and known that something was really, really wrong when no birds or squirrels came out of their nests, but you weren’t as experienced as your other family members were when it came to the neighboring forest. So obviously, it hit you in the face when you arrived at your destination and it was also burned to the ground, just like your home. If it hadn’t been for the half-elf, you would have fallen off the horse due to the shock that shook you up quite badly. Just a week ago, you had been talking to this old man from this village at your market, promising him to buy an extra sack of potatoes from him if he introduced you to his grandson.

Now, they might have been both dead.

‘Hey, where are…’

The rider’s question didn’t register in your mind as you jumped off the horse and ran in a random direction, calling for survivors and looking for anyone who might have needed your help. It took you less than twenty steps to bump into the first half-burnt corpse and seven lifeless bodies in total to find the old man.

Overwhelmed, you didn’t realize how much the sight affected you until your knees hit the ground beside the man and your head crushed into a firm bundle of muscles, albeit less roughly.

The last thing you heard was the rider’s voice before your brain shut itself down.

Later, when you woke up, your wounds were dressed in clean textile and your head was put on something soft that gave enough support to your neck to not be in pain despite the hours you might have spent sleeping on the ground. It had been still pretty early when you had reached the other side of the forest; however, based on the blinding sunlight that shone down on you at a sharp angle from the sky, now, it had to be way into the afternoon.

What had happened while you had been out? Had there been any survivors? And where were you exactly anyway?

Where was the ri…

‘Good morning, sweetheart,’ a distinctly familiar, deep voice greeted you, and you made the mistake of trying to get in a sitting position as soon as possible to look at the half-elf, letting out an involuntary whine in the process. Hell. The middle of your forehead was throbbing; you felt so dizzy as if you had a head injury. Had you gotten hit on the head or something? You seriously couldn’t remember.

Your confusion must have been written on your face, because the next thing you knew, the rider crouched down in front of you and picked up a torn textile from the floor. Then, he rinsed it in a bowl of water and pushed you on your back, placing it back on your forehead.

‘You accidentally hit your head when I put you down, so that I could look for something to eat,’ he explained with an apologetic smile, the expression making it obvious even for your smashed brain that it hadn’t been you, per se, who had hit your head, but him who had been too careless.

You didn’t call him out on his wording, though. Mostly, because he had carried you to a safe place and stayed with you regardless of being strangers. In spite of your rude questions and open distrust. He hadn’t been obliged to protect you after you had accused him of killing your loved ones, but he had still done so. To you, this spoke volume.

‘Would it help if I told you my name?’

The question made no sense to you. Why would it have helped with anything if you had learned the rider’s name? And with what exactly did he think you needed help? 

On the other hand, would knowing his name have made anything worse? You could have pretty much stopped referring to him as a rider and a half-elf in your head, which might have actually taken less out of your already drained brain power. Hence, you nodded (and hissed when it triggered yet another mini explosion behind your forehead). Ouch. That hurt.

‘Theo. My mom was a maid at the Light Elves’ Court in the south,’ he introduced himself, although the revelation that he was one of the creatures known as the least worse out of all monstrous magical beings did add to your guilt. He might not have been a good guy, either, but he wasn’t out there, killing thousands of innocents, either, and as bad as it sounded, that was already more you could have wished for.

So you told him your name in exchange and what had happened to your village the previous night, leaving out the teeny, tiny detail that the reason you could have run away was the lack of magic rushing through your veins. You didn’t have any proof.

Not to mention, saying that aloud could have still put you in danger - a voice akin to your mother’s warned you quietly.

After the most crucial pieces of information were shared and there was a semi-solid base that your acquaintanceship could have been built on, Theo brought up some lighter topics to ease the mood while you were munching on berries and rose apples. They might not have been as delicious as your mother’s kimbap rolls and chicken salad, but they were filling and that was all that mattered.

‘You should rest some more. I’ll stand guard,’ the rider reassured you and covered your upper body with his jacket before you could have protested. And you were grateful for him. You were grateful that he didn’t give any chance to your stubborn ass to claim you weren’t tired. Because you were. You were so exhausted, sleeping a couple more hours sounded exactly like what you needed.

‘Hn,’ you gave in with a low hum, enjoying the phantom touch of his fingertips against your skin and in your hair moments before you fell asleep.

Your initial plan to look for help at the nearest village, obviously, had been thrown out the window. However, it wasn’t like you could have just given up and not do anything. You had to find your family - or at least their remains if that was all that was left of them - and you couldn’t have possibly done that alone. You still needed people. You still needed survivors. Warriors. Anyone with weapons and will to kick elf asses.

You also needed a companion. And Theo was offering his help to you on a silver plate like he had nothing better to do despite those elves he had sent ahead - those elves he had promised to catch up with - right before your encounter. It was weird but appreciated, and you weren’t exactly in the position to look the gift horse in the mouth.

Thus, you made a deal: he would stay with you until you found a village that was spared by these monsters and in exchange, you promised to tell him those details he knew you had left out of your story about the massacre. It sounded like giving out nothing for everything, but you guessed, everyone had different values. What wasn’t valuable to you might have been a treasure to someone else.

You got on horseback a day after you had woken up after fainting from overstimulation and traveled from village to village just to meet more destruction than you had ever seen in your life. Honestly, before the night you had been separated from your family, you couldn’t have even imagined something so brutal. The fire wasn’t even the worst part. It was the smell of roasted flesh and the sight of those personal belongings that had somehow survived. The first time you had seen a pile of ash next to a half-burned doll, you had been crying for minutes for a child you had known nothing about.

Losing hope was too easy. It took you no longer than a week of constant failure and you felt like you didn’t have it in you to keep going. What was the use? You had gotten further and further from your home and still had no army that could have challenged the elves. Not to mention how hard it had become to work up an appetite with the stink of death in your pores, your hair and your clothes even after taking a bath in a stream or lake (depending on what the two of you came across in the afternoons). In short, there was no use and you had no energy to start a fight.

A magicless one-man-army had no business to start a war. It would have made no difference if you had just given yourself up. In fact, that might have been less embarrassing.

‘What’s making you so conflicted? Your forehead is all wrinkly.’ Theo sat down by the fire beside you, his rough fingertips trying to smooth out the furrows on your forehead, around your eyes and between your eyebrows. You pressed your lips together to suppress a whine. It was exhausting, thinking and talking about your feelings. They were so negative and draining these days.

You let out a sigh, watching over the fish you were roasting on wooden sticks.

‘Do you think what we’re doing is useless? As far as we know, the Dark Elves could rule the whole kingdom by now,’ you voiced out your second biggest fear, too scared to bring up the possibility of your family’s death. Talking about that would have made it real and a stubborn part of you refused to believe they hadn’t made it.

Could there have been a safe haven out there somewhere for those who had survived? Were there others trying to accomplish the same goal as you, albeit with more success?

‘I’m pretty sure we’d know about it if they took control over the whole kingdom, sweetheart. Don’t worry your pretty head about them. Let’s concentrate on finding an unaffected village,’ he slid his fingers to your jawline, tapping on your cheek once, twice, three times before he pulled your head against his chest.

Instead of complaining, you buried your nose into his loose shirt, sniffing his characteristic, musky scent that made you feel safe. You wanted him to be right so much.

‘I don’t know what I would do without you,’ you mumbled under your nose when the silence stretched too long, giving in to the urge to close your eyes and get lost in his closeness. The warmth of Theo’s body enveloped you like a fluffy blanket on an unforgivingly cold winter night.

‘You would be just fine,’ the rider insisted, and you appreciated his faith in you, even though a voice in your head insisted that the only reason he said this was how little he knew about you. He had no idea that under the pseudo-confident, stubborn facade you were weak. You had been born weak and being sheltered by your entire village, you had never gotten the chance to grow strong.

You didn’t even know which berries were edible in the woods.

‘I really wouldn’t,’ you admitted defeatedly, closing your eyes and taking a few shallow breaths as an attempt to gather enough courage to speak the truth. If Theo had really meant what he had said, that meant he hadn’t yet figured out that you couldn’t have backed him up in a fight in case you had come across danger. It wasn’t fair to him that you kept him in the dark. ‘I don’t have any magic. Nothing. I was born without an ounce of magic in my body.’

You wished you could have taken back your words as soon as they fell from your chapped lips. It scared you, the rider’s non-verbal reaction: his arms coming up around your torso and pulling you impossibly close. Why wasn’t he saying anything? You needed him to say it, to say something, even if that something was a scolding or a series of profanities.

‘Theo?’ You tried to pull away to be able to look him in the eyes, but his hold on you was too strong, and you barely managed to tilt your head backwards to at least see a bit of his jawline. It didn’t seem tense, which gave you hope that maybe, maybe his silence didn’t mean that he was angry with you. Your confession must have rendered him speechless, that was all.

You bit into your lower lip, counting to ten, fifteen, thirty in your head before you decided that enough was enough. You needed him to come back to the present instead of stucking in his head.

‘You know…’ you started, not quite sure what you could have said that would have made the situation better. ‘I might be a deadweight, but I think you make me stronger, so it’s not like it’s as bad as it sounds,’ you explained, playing with open cards as you should have done from the beginning. Or well, from the day you had made that deal about staying together.

At that point, you were so worried about what could have been going through the half-elf’s head that you got a tad taken aback when he gave you enough space to look up at him from a more comfortable angle.

‘What do you mean?’ He asked, confusion written all over his face, which would have made you giggle if the tightness in your chest hadn’t been so suffocating. Should you have told him everything or only a fragment of the odd things you had experienced in his closeness these past few days? Would he have believed you if he had heard the truth or deemed you crazy and left without a second thought?

You gulped, your throat suddenly resembling parchments. It was time to tear off the bandaid, wasn’t it? You had simply said too much to back out.

You gulped another time to steal a couple of seconds in which you pathetically failed to put yourself back together, but it was fine. At least, you told yourself that you would have been fine if he had just packed up and left. Sure, it would have taken a lot of time, but you could have gone back to your village on your own and started the search all over again, going in a different direction.

‘I don’t really know how to explain it, but you remember the first time we met?’ You asked, absentmindedly fidgeting with his loose shirt. ‘I could feel your presence, and while I’m sure it’s not a big deal to you, to me… it was a first.’ Out of nervousness, you casted your eyes down, but didn’t stop talking. ‘The other day, when I was at the verge of a panic attack and you told me to calm down, my heart listened.’ 

You sounded crazy, deep down you knew you did. Because what you were describing was the bond that your parents shared, what your grandparents had shared when they had been still alive and what those who were blessed to have a soulmate shared. Although you lived in a world where magic was real, complete soulmate bonds were almost as rare as your kind. So to have one while not possessing the ability to practice magic, it was unfathomable.  

You wouldn’t have blamed Theo if he had thought you had lost it. Because what you were implying included things you obviously hadn’t experienced, only had heard from stories. For example, the reason why your parents always knew when the other person was in danger, felt happy or needed a hug. Soulmates, after all, shared feelings and had the ability to comfort each other without as much as touching or being in the same room.

‘What? You say I’m your soulmate?’ The boy teased and it would have been a lie to say his lighthearted question didn’t hurt. Was it that unbelievable that you could have been destined for each other?

Well… it wasn’t like you were a hundred percent sure about it, either, but still. Was his soft chuckle necessary?

Whether it was your sour facial expression and pouty lips or something more special, Theo seemed to be able to sense your bitterness and cupped your cheeks with his hands. He looked you in the eyes for long enough to make you feel shy and with that, to make you surrender. As a soft whine escaped your mouth, you leaned forwards and buried your face in the crook of his neck where he let you hide.

‘You’re cute,’ he mumbled against the crown of your head, nosing your hair as he slid his hand back on your waist. You stayed like that for a few moments, soaking in the silence, but not as long as you would have preferred.

If you had done that, the fish would have definitely burned to ashes on your wooden sticks and you would have both been left without food for the rest of the night. There was no way Theo could have caught more of them so late at night even if he was an amazing hunter and a determined provider for the two of you.

And if you had hated your dinner for stealing the half-elf’s embrace from you, you made sure your body language didn’t show it. Which meant, the only way Theo could have known it was if he had been indeed your soulmate. And that was impossible, wasn’t it?

It was time you stopped believing in fairy tales. Miracles didn’t happen to people like you.

It had been around a month that you had run away from the surprise attack that had destroyed your home, and you had yet to come across a village that would have been willing (or able) to help you fight the Dark Elves. With the help of Theo, you had successfully worked through each and every one of your episodes; nowadays, you didn’t feel frustration when your eyes fell upon half-destroyed houses and corpses that had turned unrecognizable after the vultures had had their feast. You still felt sadness, of course you did, but not to the point of breaking down and it might have been a small step to an outsider, but to you, it was another proof that the half-elf’s presence made you stronger.

You were convinced that there wasn’t anything you couldn’t have overcome while he was near you.

However, to your misfortune, the rider couldn’t be near you all day every day. For example, he was in charge of hunting for food and looking for water and your company slowed down both of those processes. As it had turned out, your incapability to sense life mixed with your loud footsteps turned you into a human-alarm for the animals in the area.

You were so focused on setting up the fire for the fish Theo had promised you for dinner that you were completely oblivious to the monster who appeared at the border of the forest you used as a potential hiding place in case of emergency.

You yelped when something sharp and pointy was held to your neck. The adamantine blade barely touched you, but you could feel your blood lazily dripping down your skin. How you got yourself in situations like this all the time, that was beyond you. All this time, you had been convinced that Dark Elves couldn’t have cared less about your existence and yet, here you were, about to be slaughtered by one.

You could only wish Theo wouldn’t come back to your makeshift camp before it was over; your heart ached just thinking of him getting killed because of you. Because you were so weak, you couldn’t have even used the woods to your advantage when the half-elf had told you a million times why it was smart to stay close to the trees. Why couldn’t you have done at least this one thing right on your own?

‘Where is he?’ The monster groaned into your ear, his warm breath tickling the sensitive skin right under your ear. You didn’t like the fact that he was talking to you. It felt humiliating, like he was playing with his food as you were pretty sure he didn’t intend to let you go once you answered his question.

You choked on your saliva when the elf grabbed your hair and pulled your head backwards. His blade grazed your neck and with that, left another wound behind, only a few inches under the first one. It was deeper, bled more, but your loose shirt soaked up the blood diligently. 

‘I asked you a question,’ the monster spat, forcing you to look him in his sharp, silver eyes. His skin had the same glow as Theo had, but in his case, pretty and beautiful were the last things on your mind when you tried to read his facial expressions. ‘Where. Is. H—’

You didn’t realize you were screaming until a pair of strong arms pulled you away from the dark elf and familiar, calloused palms cupped your cheeks, redirecting your focus. With utmost gentleness, Theo wiped away your tears and pressed his lips against your forehead, not letting you go.

‘I’m so sorry, sweetheart,’ he mumbled against your skin right before he pulled away and assessed your injuries. ‘I’m so sorry,’ he repeated, sliding his right palm on the cuts on your neck tentatively.

Theo’s magic coursed through you; however, it didn’t hurt like it did when your neighbors’ son used his power on you, nor did it resemble a strike of electricity such as when your sister healed your wounds. The half-elf’s magic was warm like a blanket. It not only took care of your injuries, but also comforted your soul.

Admittedly a little light-headed, you let Theo pull your head against his firm chest and keep you there while you were looking out of your head. Somewhere in the back of your head, you knew that there had to be a dark elf nearby, or at least the remains of such a creature. Slowly but surely you could recall the knife that had pierced through the monster’s abdomen while you had been still held at blade point. The main reason you had been screaming hadn’t been the shock, but the pain you had felt in your side…

You dragged your hand to the area that you remembered should have been in pain and pulled away from Theo in panic when you could feel the hole in your shirt. You looked down and saw that the fabric was red. Yet, when your fingers finally sneaked under the textile, they touched nothing but smooth skin. You furrowed your brow in confusion.

‘How?’

‘I healed it. There was no other way, but I healed it as soon as I had you in my arms,’ the boy claimed and you looked up at him, lips parted in wonder.

Maybe, you should have been mad at him for putting your life at risk without hesitation. The old you would have definitely screamed anyone else’s head off for less than this and still, as you looked into his worried eyes, that were desperately searching for forgiveness, you reached out to his face and smiled up at him.

‘Thank you. For saving me,’ you whispered like a secret and brushed a silly, stubborn mop of hair behind his ear at the same time he did the same to you. It made you giggle despite the horrific happenings and upon hearing your laugh, Theo’s eyes lit up like a birthday cake.

With what had you deserved someone like him in your life?

With what had you deserved to be alive in the first place?

‘I’ll always save you,’ the rider declared, pulling you in his lap. It was then that you actually noticed you had been both sitting in the dirt all along. It was also the first time that your gaze fell on your attacker’s corpse lying behind Theo mere meters away from you. You pressed your chin into his shoulder and shut your eyes. The whimper that escaped your mouth was unintentional. ‘Shh. I won’t let anyone take you away from me. I promise you. No one can hurt you.’

You wanted to say thank you over and over again. You also wanted to reassure him that you knew you could trust him with your life and today’s happenings hadn’t planted any doubt about him in your mind. He had saved you; how he had done it, what path he had chosen did not affect your opinion. You had long made peace with how cruel the world really was. You couldn’t have afforded to see it only in black and white anymore.

‘Theo…’ The plea that broke out from your throat sounded pathetic even to you, but the rider didn’t seem to mind it or find it as ridiculous as you did.

No, when he put his index finger under your chin and encouraged you to open your eyes, all you could see was determination on his face. You assumed he wanted to prove it to you that he meant every world. He hardly had any other reasons to look so hell-bent at that moment. Maybe the way you phrased your reassurance hadn’t been as fierce as you had intended it to be. It might have come out hesitant due to your shock.

‘I mean it. You know why?’ You didn’t know why, but you didn’t shake your head, nor did you voice out your confusion. Of course, you had assumptions such as the deal you two had made, but somehow, saying out loud that you were a contract to him felt so wrong. Especially after he had saved you from a dark elf instead of looking in the other direction. ‘Because I care about you,’ he confessed, casting a metaphorical spell on you with how he wetted his lips after the last word fell from them.

You couldn’t look away. You couldn’t move. But if you wanted to be honest, you didn’t want to either. Especially when Theo destroyed the distance between your lips slowly albeit steadily, and you could taste yourself on his tongue as he licked into your mouth with ease. The kiss you shared wasn’t eager. He didn’t rush you or push you too hard. He let the moment drag out, then allowed your lungs to fill themselves with fresh air before he dived in once more.

Your lips tingled by the time you stopped kissing and your heart was dangerously close to an explosion. If you hadn’t known better, you would have thought something wasn’t quite right with the heightened reaction it pulled out of you, but you were aware that it was merely the consequence of your inexperience. You had never been kissed before; but you were glad that Theo could be your first. Your second and third.

You lost count of how many times he captured your lips before your stomach demanded some of his attention, too, and reminded both of you of the fish he had promised you.

That night, the half-elf called your lips his dessert when the dinner was gone.

A lot changed after that day; meanwhile, it felt as though you came across the same, hopeless sight whenever you stumbled upon an area that should have been populated: piles of ashes, half-burned houses, death. You didn’t know how it was possible that every time you chose a direction, you ended up at a dead end; however, you couldn’t deny what was right in front of you. You couldn’t deny the lack of survivors and all that misery.

‘Maybe we should go back west?’ You asked after you arrived at another abandoned village. You admitted, you hadn’t been thinking about your family that much nowadays, but the sight of what was undoubtedly a hunter’s hut reminded you of your father, and your longing for him, your mother and Nobara returned with great intensity.

Why were you still marching towards the eastern border when you had wanted to turn back a week ago? Did you have any reason to believe that they had come so far from your home without you?

‘We should go east like we agreed on,’ Theo protested, and while his voice was gentle and the kiss he pressed against your lips light as a feather, something inside your chest felt tight as you nodded.

Oh. How could you have forgotten that you had agreed on that direction because of… What was your reason for heading east? There must have been a reason, a good one on top of that, otherwise, you wouldn’t have said yes. Why had you said yes? Suddenly, going east made no sense.

But then, Theo took your hand and pulled you towards his horse. He stole one more kiss from your lips before he helped you climb on the animal, and the two of you galloped in the previously agreed direction. East.

It took the doubtful voice inside your head a couple of miles to quiet down, but when it did, it became easy to lean into Theo’s body and let him guide you towards your next destination. If it hadn’t been for the dizziness you felt whenever you closed your eyes while riding his horse, you might have fallen asleep in his arms; his closeness was that soothing to you by that point. Or was it the soft melody he was humming into your ear that effortlessly calmed your nerves?

You wouldn’t have been surprised if your acceptance had been a result of both. Or the love confession that was oozing from every gesture he made.

The thought that something was really wrong with how pliant you were in the half-elf’s arms somehow didn’t cross your mind even when your eyes fell on the military camp near the eastern border. What you felt instead while you were getting closer and closer to the huge, black and silver tents was confusion. Did Theo not realize that these were the colors of the enemy? Of those creatures who had destroyed so much already and might not have planned to stop until your whole kingdom was in ashes.

At the first sight of actual dark elves in the area - a part of you hoped until the last moment that what you came across was an abandoned camp -, your body became tense and all you wanted to do was run away.  However, with Theo’s arms around your petite body, it wasn’t as easy as it should have been. Couldn’t he see what you were seeing? Shouldn’t he have felt their presence?

‘Theo, I really don’t think we should keep going,’ you spoke up eventually, your voice barely above a whisper. ‘Maybe they haven’t seen us yet. It’s not too la—’

‘It’s okay, just calm down, sweetheart,’ he cut you off while simultaneously turning you into jelly with his hot breath fanning over the juncture between your neck and shoulder. Even though you pressed your lips together in mild frustration, your body immediately shrank to a smaller size, hence the rider’s chin on top of your head caged you in that much more.

You still felt safe in Theo’s closeness, but it was different somehow. With all those elves suddenly having their eyes on you, with the cogs in your brain spinning at a restless speed, you couldn’t put your finger on what was so off. After all, as far as you were concerned, fear and anxiety were natural reactions to danger. Then, it hit you: as you were helped down from Theo’s horse, your heart wasn’t at the verge of a panic attack. Why wasn’t your heart about to explode? You two had no chance against a smaller army of powerful magic users.

You had no way out now that so many of them were aware of your presence in their territory. Hell, you had walked into their camp like you had the right to be there.

You curled your fingers and let your nails dig into the soft flesh of your palms. Why was your heartbeat so slow?

You didn’t have too much time to dwell on it, though, because the next thing you knew was Theo’s calloused fingers in-between yours and a strong pull that demanded your attention. Oh. You were walking more into the camp.

‘Taeyang. It has been a while,’ a beautiful woman… No, a beautiful dark elf exclaimed with little to no enthusiasm, her gray eyes loitering over the rider for a couple of seconds before they fell on you. You gulped, and she dismissed you with a frown. ‘You have never shown up at the northern frontline. Is this your reason?’

This. Not you, not a human being, not even a magicless creature. This. The elf couldn’t have made it any more obvious that you were worth nothing to her.

You resisted the urge to take a step back and hid behind Theo’s back. Instead, you stayed still and quiet in hopes of not drawing too much attention, although it must have been too late already. The crowd around you was big enough; you honestly doubted there was anyone in the camp who wasn’t witnessing the happenings. The tense conversation between this beautiful woman and Th… Taeyang.

Why did this new name hurt you so much?

‘Only partly, my queen,’ Taeyang said as soon as he went down on one knee, leaving you exposed to the spectators and making you feel unprotected. Your hands were shaking, but not as much as they should have and your damned heart was still at ease as if it had been on a silly mission, trying to please the rider next to you. ‘She is a survivor of the massacres in the forest villages. No one other than me could feel her presence while we passed her by even though she is not good at hiding. This ability is a threat to our plans. I apologize. I had to investigate before sending words to you, my queen,’ the boy explained and his words should have crushed you, but you couldn’t feel the heartache as though your heart was incapable of anything else but remaining calm.

The woman gave you another once-over with a bit more interest this time.

‘She is still alive. Did you not find the answers?’ She inquired, her white locks falling into her face as she put her elbow onto the armrest of her chair and rested her chin on top of the back of her hand. She looked so bored while she was asking for the reason why you were still alive.

‘She means no threat, my queen. In fact, the reason why she managed to escape is that she is so insignificant, our kind completely dismisses her existence. There is not even a drop of magic in her body,’ the half-elf explained before he quickly added: ‘However, she is obedient. She is my slave now.’

‘Are you sure it’s not the other way around, Theo?’ Someone from the mass asked and it did not take too long before your eyes found the golden-haired dark elf who dared to interrupt the conversation between Taeyang and the unamused royalty. He radiated annoyance and pride as he walked up to your trio. ‘Because I saw you protecting this human and killing your kind. Like a lapdog, waiting for their owner’s treats and compliments for doing such a good job.’

The golden-haired elf scoffed and spat on the grass right in front of the rider’s feet.

‘I see.’ It was the queen talking, dismissing the second elf with a simple wave of her hand. If the circumstances had been different, you would have admired her for the power she held - up until that moment you hadn’t even known the Dark Elves had a female rules -, but the situation was everything you would have rather avoided and you had no respect for anyone who talked about human life the way she did. ‘Let’s see how important she is then.’

For the first time in hours, your heart skipped a beat in panic, and you wondered whether it was deliberate or if it was your own anxiety at all that you were experiencing. Why would your heart have suddenly decided to act up when it malfunctioned during this whole drama? If anyone, it should have been Taeyang who felt scared and jittery due to the woman’s vague declaration. After all, you had been a dead human the moment the boy had brought you here. His future, however, most likely depended on the next couple of minutes.

‘What do you wish me to do, my queen?’ Taeyang inquired and you tilted your head as you allowed yourself to really look at him. He didn’t seem nervous and his voice was also too stable for your liking, but his thumb was tapping on his little finger every ten seconds, so your assumption could have been right. You might have actually gotten better at reading him, you concluded, which, for some reason, made you feel proud.

Never in your life had your emotions confused you this much. Nothing made any sense to you anymore. The lack of disappointment, the barely there fear, that damned calmness. Not a single thing.

‘You say she is obedient. I want to see just how obedient she can be,’ the queen answered, not giving too many hints to the half-elf; however, one look at the boy’s firm jawline was enough to you to know he had gotten the message you had unsurprisingly missed.

‘Your wish is my command, my queen,’ the half-elf insisted before he stood up and turned towards you with his entire body.

The brewing storm in his gray eyes clashed with your calm. You were so stuck in the bubble your staring contest created, you didn’t realize the weight of the moment until you heard a familiar voice calling your name.

‘No, no. She can’t be here. You can’t be here, noh-ho…’ your sister cried out, her crazed eyes growing three times their usual size the moment she saw you. The lump in your throat felt big and hairy as you continuously tried and failed to swallow it down.

Why was she here?

‘Don’t move,’ were the first words that left Taeyang’s mouth; you felt both surprised and not when your body shut down and your limbs refused to move. You also didn’t know what to think about your defleating need to be close to your family. Up until that moment, your yearning for your sister’s closeness might have been flickering but constant. Now, when you were finally at an arm’s length from her, you just didn’t know what you wanted. If you had still wanted to hug her. If you should have still wanted her in your life and it unnerved you: that your feelings felt so foreign all of a sudden.

You furrowed your brows and looked up at the rider. What was happening to you?

‘That girl over there…’ the half-elf started as he cupped your cheeks and turned your head in your sister’s direction. Nobara was crying like the world was about to end, but unlike a few seconds before, now she was restricted by magical ropes that had grown from the ground. ‘She wants me dead. And you can’t lose me, can you, sweetheart?’ Theo asked and you could feel your heart clench at the thought of the half-elf’s death, hence you shook your head frantically. No. For some reason, you couldn’t lose him. ‘You have to protect me,’ he whispered into your ear before he pecked your lips.

Theo stepped away from you a moment later, but not before he pushed a knife into your hand. Your body, led by your determined heart, moved on automatic as you walked up to your si… to Theo’s enemy.

‘You freaking cowards. Just kill me, you hear me! Kill me. Don’t make her do it!’ The faintly familiar girl was screaming from the top of her lungs, making you wonder why the hell did she look so sad despite the curses. Shouldn’t she have been angry or scared?

With one precise cut on her neck and no free hands to put pressure on the wound, the girl fell on her knees and choked on her blood as she said:

‘S’ rr.’

Lacking further instructions, you could almost taste a small part of your free will on the tip of your tongue. Tears immediately blurred your vision, then soaked your cheeks and you didn’t even know why.

‘Oh, sweetheart.’ Theo’s palm was warm against your cheek, his gentle caresses pacifying the raging frustration in your soul. Devastated and confused, but still sort of detached, you let him pull your head against his chest and buried your face in his loose shirt. Something was wrong, something was seriously wrong with you and this situation, and you needed him to tell you what had just happened. ‘You still don’t get it, do you?’

You really didn’t, and you shook your head to signal that you had no idea what was going on. You hoped it would be enough for the half-elf to have mercy on you and fill you in on the details.

Theo pressed his lips against the crown of your head and let out a sigh-laugh.

‘Your theory about soulmates… It wasn’t completely wrong,’ he started, mumbling into your hair. Your heart picked up its rate in excitement and you pulled away from him only a little, just to be able to see his beautiful face. ‘You were meant for me. I’m the successor of your heart. You gave it to me willingly.’

You furrowed your brows, admittedly unsure of what he had meant by that, but then he put his hand on your chest, right above your heart and the warmth lulled you into a state that felt so satisfying, it overpowered your need to understand just how literal his words could have been. You had confessed that you both cared about each other. Sure, it couldn’t have meant more than two unsure I love yous.

You loved him. He loved you.

‘You are dismissed,’ you could hear the queen’s voice from somewhere on your right, but you didn’t turn in her direction until she asked her men to clean up the mess. Then, you snapped your head in  her way without meaning to, and your eyes found the dead girl on the ground once more.

Nobara.

Your lips trembled at the sight of her lifeless body, but before you could have thought too much into your body’s unconscious reaction, Theo pulled you away from the scene.

You were sitting on the edge of the half-elf’s queen-sized bed, swinging your feet back and forth while you were waiting for him to bring you food. The tent that had been assigned to the two of you had the size of a smaller bedroom, which reminded you of people whose faces might have been familiar, but meant close to nothing to you.

You had an inkling feeling, that one of them was related to the dead girl somehow. You just couldn’t quite pinpoint the connection.

‘I hope you like rabbit meat,’ Theo exclaimed with a wide grin as soon as he entered the tent. He had two plates in one hand and a jug of iced water in the other, but he still managed to close the curtain door flawlessly to maintain your privacy.

‘I do,’ you reassured him and took one of the plates from him, placing the porcelain on your lap. The food smelled delicious, and it made you contemplate whether you should have asked any of those questions that had been on your mind while he had been gone. You didn’t want to ruin your dinner when it was your first time eating from actual plates, far from the horrific massacres of…

You furrowed your brows. Just a moment ago, you had been convinced that you were safe at this campsite. However, weren’t they the same monsters who had killed all those people you had never gotten the chance to speak to? Villages robbed and burned to the ground, innocent people killed at their own homes. These crimes had been committed by Dark Elves. You had been almost killed by a dark elf. So why were you so calm about staying at their tent?

And why were you so affected yet unaffected by that dead girl whose bled-out body stuck in your head for no goddamn reason?

‘Theo… Can I ask you something?’ You spoke up in a small voice, only continuing when the boy gave you the green light with the most precious smile you had ever seen on his face.

‘When it’s just the two of us, you can ask anything, sweetheart,’ he said as he wiped some of the juice off his lips with his thumb and sucked his finger clean with his eyes on you. 

You gulped, determined to stay focused.

‘About the dead girl… Who is she? I feel like she is someone important to m—’

Before you could have finished your sentence, Theo grabbed both of your arms and turned you towards himself. Your food, half-eaten and sad, fell on the floor dirtying not only the rugs but your left foot, too. Could it have been that the rider’s “anything” did not include that girl? It definitely seemed so.

You swallowed down the bile that was creeping up in your throat. Your eyeballs were moving from left to right repeatedly in desperation. You had never meant to upset him. You had just wanted to know why your heart was so calm while the cogs inside your brain tried to remind you of something important.

‘Look in my eyes,’ Theo demanded and you willed yourself to focus on one single point on his face instead of trying to take everything in: the small twitches of his jawline, the flaring of his nostrils. ‘From now on, I’ll be the only one you’ll think about. Noone else, only me, you hear me? I’ll be the only one on your mind,’ he said firmly.

Your lips parted for a soft protest, but no words made it through them. And a couple of seconds later, you couldn’t even pinpoint why you would have wanted to think about anybody else but your soulmate. Because Theo was your soulmate, he had to be. There was no other explanation for the warmth you felt in your chest whenever his eyes bored into yours so lovingly.

When the silence stretched long enough for the half-elf to break it, you let him feed you with his own food and also followed him towards the barrel in the back of the tent that was filled with warm water for bathing. A distant memory about how shy you had felt when a few of your boy neighbors had showed up at the stream you had been playing in with your… with someone close to you popped up in your mind, but it disappeared just as quickly, and with that, your reason to ask for some privacy.

‘Come here, sweetheart, and put your hands up for me,’ the half-elf asked and you did as he said with a happy smile, letting him help you out of your clothes and wash your body with a soft cloth while you were sitting in the enormous barrel. These were activities you could have done on your own, a faint voice in your head tried to remind you; however, you shut its nagging out easily and leaned your head back against the edge of the barrel with a content sigh. It felt so nice to be taken care of.

To not have to worry about what was next, because Theo was there for you to make those decisions on your behalf with your best interest in mind.

To be guided and told when the water was starting to get too cold, and be wrapped in a warm towel afterwards. Like this, being carried to your shared bed, it was easy to only think about Theo. To only want to be embraced by Theo.

To live for your soulmate.

‘My beautiful sweetheart. You must be tired, hm? It was such an exhausting day,’ the half-elf mumbled against the top of your head after he tucked you under the blankets and pulled you against his chest. He was stroking your hair slowly, making you hesitant whether you should have told him you didn’t want to sleep.  

It didn’t matter, not anymore. And maybe he knew your body better than you knew yourself anyway. Because you did fall asleep the moment he said:

‘Sleep, my love. I promise you, no one will dare to hurt you until you’re here with me.’

the end.

[kariachi]

Some fic. Same brand of shit that's been the last few, focusing on old rp stuffs with Monie. This time a daemon au.

~~

“So, are we telling people before your siblings show up,” Monette asked as she forced a brush through Chazz’s far too thick, wet hair. “Because you know they’re going to realize you’ve Settled as soon as they see you.”

“May as well tell everyone after breakfast,” he replied, rolling his eyes. In his lap, a brush going through her equally thick fur, Bala scoffed.

“They should’ve realized on their own at this point,” she said, as if they hadn’t been back for all of maybe five hours, come from school directly to their grandpair’s for break. Though she had been preening and posing more than usual. If nothing else it was enough for Cadyl to chuckle, setting Monie’s half-done evening braid aside long enough to reach around and scratch behind her ear.

“Yeah yeah, your beauty should have made it clear.” She flashed teeth nearly as long as his in response to the half-teasing tone, making a half-hearted lunge and snap at his hand at didn’t come near to landing.

“Don’t mock me, fluffnuts.” He just snorted, returning to taking advantage of having thumbs.

“You know that’d land harder if you weren’t also fluffy.” Huffing, Bala settled back with what was not a pout. Princetons didn’t pout, and if anyone claimed otherwise, they were hallucinating.

Monie and Cadyl had long decided something was wrong with this side of their family. Shit was wrong with the other one too, but that was more bigotry and less whatever was going on with their cousins over here.

“You’re gorgeous, darling,” Monie chimed in, running the brush through one last time to make sure she hadn’t missed anything. “An absolute alpine queen. Between the pair of you I’m amazed you weren’t sent home for beating suitors off with sticks.”

“It was close, if school’d run just a day longer.” Chazz smirked as he spoke, lifting his chin haughtily. The other pair laughed, he and his daemon somehow relaxing more than they had before at the sound. Weekly calls were one thing, but the four of them hadn’t seen each other in person for nearly a year.

There was something about sitting in your room, laughing with your bestfriend that couldn’t be compared to.

“We could’ve gotten a few more days of relief, at least, if those morons hadn’t decided to throw that party,” Bala said- “It wasn’t even good.”-with the sneer that meant they’d had fun and appreciated the effort.

“Well lucky we already have one planned,” Cadyl said.

“You can take pictures back in the fall,” Monette continued, “show them what a proper party looks like.” Though unable to turn to look at her, not with her already working his hair into a braid for the night, Chazz’s tone got the desire through.

“Did you just show up and tell grandad and gram you were throwing a party for no reason?”

“Mm-hm. It’s not as if it would have mattered if they said no, we already have things scheduled and paid for.” The other pair barked a laugh in unison, Bala shaking her head while Chazz rolled his eyes.

“You spoiled little- Do they deny you anything?”

“Do they deny you?”

“If we counted it up, it would probably be more often,” Bala said. Chuckling, Monie and Cadyl shook their heads. He finished up her braid, giving a light tug before walking across the bed to drape himself over Bala’s legs.

“They want to talk to you lot, by the way,” he said, stroking her fur when she and Chazz both tensed. “They’re going to wait until your siblings arrive and get settled before calling you all into the office.” Monette set Chazz’s hair aside for the moment, instead looping her arms around his chest and giving a gentle squeeze.

“They were talking with our parents. They’re pissed. Like ‘will Slade and Idida still be in the will’ pissed.” Chazz took a steadying breath, Bala’s tail swinging anxiously.

There were two pairs alive that didn’t get anxious staring down their grandpair- not helped by the sheer size of cape buffalo- and those were Monie and Cadyl and their damming pair. The entire rest of the family, even though they’d never had anything worse harsh words well deserved and firm discipline, still hated to see their ire.

Cadyl scratched at Bala’s ear, Monette’s grip tightened.

“You know we’ll be right outside the door,” he said. With a huff Bala swatted at him, gentle enough to do minimal damage. Chazz put on a small smirk.

“The way they let you get away with things, we’ll be shocked if you aren’t in the office.” A laugh, another squeeze, and Monie returned to braiding while their daemons batted at each other in familiar play. “So, what’s the plan for this party?”

“Well to start with, you have an appointment with the tailor tomorrow afternoon, we want to make sure your new clothes fit right before they do the embroidery.”

“You’re getting a cloak for Christmas, by the way.”

“There’ll be people over to set everything up on the fourteenth, party is the fifteenth-”

“Five o’clock sharp, so you’ll be coming down somewhere about five twenty-five. A nice dramatic entrance.” Bala opened her out, openly bemused. “Consider it practice for your pro career.”

“You’re wearing boots, by the way, there’s going to be about two inches of fake snow and plenty of faux rocks for Bala to climb and show off on. And shrimp is in season so you are being spoiled-”

“You always spoil us,” Chazz pointed out.

“Because you deserve it. Things will be proper and prim for the first three hours to satisfy the old folks, we’ll be getting more upbeat and dancey at eight fifteen.”

“No, you aren’t expected to dance, but you are expected to signal the switch over and kick back looking over everything like the guests exist only for your amusement.”

“It shouldn’t be hard. We’re rehearsing the big moments on the thirteenth, so everything will be ready to go.”

“Remind me,” Bala said, raising her head to meet Chazz’s eyes, “if we ever marry, they don’t get to plan shit.” More laughter filled the room. Monette’s answering grin was wide and bright as Chazz’s smirk.

“And we don’t intend to have one of our own, so we’re hedging our bets here.”

[ladylooch]

Our Little Family - Miles Wood [With His Girls]

From the author, 👢 anon: Hey guys, we have another little wood family update. This takes a turn. I hope you guys like it.

"Babe, can we talk ?" You ask Miles, as he comes from practice. Miles is a little worried but he tries not to show you. "Yeah, can I just change and say hi to our baby ?" You smile nodding because he can. 

After changing, loving on your girl a little, Miles sits down beside you. You pout asking where your kiss is. Miles giggles and leans to kiss you. Yeah, now it's better. 

"Do you still want to get married ?" You ask him, Miles starts to panic because things are going well. So he doesn't understand. "Yes I do, you don't?" 

You chuckle. "I do, I just want to know so we can set a date and the size of our wedding." Miles relaxes as you play with his ring finger. "Got to show people that you're off the market." Yeah, he likes that a lot. 

You show him your ideas to see what he wants, if he likes them or not. He's helping, that's for sure. You guys settle on a few things. Still not knowing the size of the wedding. That kind of worries you. But you just keep going. Once you guys have a path to go, you guys decide to rest.

Miles' birthday was awesome. There wasn't a better way to spend it. All the family together. Lily had a blast. You had to give your present to him too. But that's later in the night. You climb him like a tree and let him destroy you.

Best present he could get. 

Then, the season started so things got a little crazy. Lily misses him like hell when he's on the road. But you guys are working on it. 

This road trip something is off. You can feel it. It's one of the biggest road trips so far. It's going to be hell. As the days go by, Lily starts to take a bad turn, you don't know what it's happening and you're scared, but she is not feeling well.

One night you wake to her screaming, it's the first time you hear that cry. You panicked, but then remember you're alone so you need to be in full, mom mode. You rush to her nursery. She has a fever.

You take a deep breath to clear your mind, so you can think straight. First things first, you have to change yourself and then try to lower her fever. 

When nothing you know works, she begins to wheeze a little, and that's when you decide to take her to the hospital. Grabbing everything you need in your way. Trying to calm her in the process. Before starting to drive the car, you text Miles. 

Taking Lily to the hospital. I'lll call you when I have a diagnosis. 

On your way to the hospital you call Lily's doctor to meet you there. Thankfully, she's there when you get inside with a crying Lily. They take Lily to the exam room. You're so nervous watching them work on your baby. You step aside to let the doctors work.

Seeing them poking your daughter makes you want to scream and protect her. In the middle of the craziness, Miles is calling you. You see yourself in the reflection of your scream. You look like shit, but knowing your fiance, he's probably freaking out. So you need to be the strong one here, event if you're pretending.

"Baby, what 's happening with her ?" Miles blurts out. You can hear him pacing and losing his mind. 

"I don't know, they're still working on her. They'll take her for some tests, they did the blood work. So we are still waiting." You're surprised with how calm and secure your voice is, even if you're shaking. 

He still has two more days of his road trip, before he can get home to you both. Miles is asking tons of questions and you can't give him the answers because you don't know. 

They start to move Lily, you tell Miles that you need to go and will update him as soon as you can. You end the call and tell the doctor that you're going with them. You're going to be out of their way, but you need to be close to your baby.

She doesn't look like your baby, it breaks your heart. You should have done a better job taking care of her. Lily will have to be admitted and stay a few days in the hospital. So now you need to tell that to your worried fiance. 

She's laying down in bed, with the IV in her little hand. She lost all her color. You take a deep breath before pressing Miles' contact. You call him, because you don't trust yourself if he sees you on FaceTime.

You explain that she has RSV, that she needs to stay a couple days in the hospital. You can hear Miles trying to find a solution. You tell him what hospital you guys are, but since she's admitted, he can come tomorrow after the game. You know he's not going to find a plane ticket right now. 

You want him there, but there isn't much he can do right now. Miles asks more questions about what Lily has, you try to explain the best you can, but the virus is new to you. He abruptly says that he'll work something out and let you know the plan. Then he ends the call.

Looking at the screen of your phone, you realize that he didn't even ask how you're doing. You clear a tear that is about to stream down your cheek. 

You bring the chair close to Lily's bed. You sit, laying your head on the bed holding her hand. "I'm sorry sweetheart, I should have done a better job." A couple minutes later she squeezes your finger. It brings a soft smile to your lips. 

When Lily lets your finger go, you go to the nurse station to let them know that her dad is going to come. You just don't know when. 

You can't sleep, basically watch her sleep. Making sure that she's breathing, you watch the nurses come and go. They ask if you need anything, you shake your head. You just need her to be okay. 

Miles gets there in the middle of the morning. She just went through some tests and now she's resting again. He goes straight to her bed, kissing her head. He's so worried. You say hey softly, he follows your voice, but doesn't reply. He looks at Lily again. You watch him, yeah he is upset with you because she is sick.

You bite your bottom lip, watching him. Almost an hour after he's there, her doctor comes in and explains the situation and where Lily is with her recent tests. She will need to stay at least a few more hours.

"You should go home, I'll stay with her." Miles says it's not a big deal. "Thanks, but no. I'm staying here until she's home." You're not going home without her.

You step outside to call his mom and update her. The next few hours are the coldest in your life. Miles and you barely speak.

He goes to get the food that he ordered, he's hungry and you should eat too. Even if you said you didn't want to. He's on his way back to her room with the food. 

He's about to get inside when he hears you asking the nurse, if you could have done something different. What breaks him from his guilt trip is hearing your voice breaking when you ask if it was your fault that your daughter got sick. 

The nurse assures you that it's not your fault and it's something that happens with babies. "You can't blame yourself for something that 's out of your control." She assures you that beside the RSV, Lily is a very healthy baby girl. 

It breaks Miles' heart hearing that. He feels so guilty for not being there to help you with Lily. He gets inside the room, putting the food aside, rushes to you and brings you into his arms for a hug. 

You sigh, feeling his big arms around you, that's what you needed since the middle of the night. Be in his arms. You cling to his shirt. Miles kisses your head. "I'm sorry, it wasn't fair to you the way that I was acting. I feel guilty, I want to be here with you guys." You nod, because you can't really speak. 

"You're doing such a good job with her, babe. We're so lucky to have you in our lives."

That's what you needed since the moment he walked through that door this morning. You're doing the best that you can to keep it together. You didn't eat today and have barely slept. All you want is for your baby to be okay again. 

Miles says that he still thinks you should go home, that's a huge no from you. Then he insists for you to eat something. At first you don't want to eat. He's getting a little frustrated there.

"Babe, if you don't eat you're going to get sick and you can't get sick. You can't take care of our baby. So you need to eat something." Miles says with a serious voice. You nod and move to the table where the food is. You eat slowly watching Lily in her bed. 

Meanwhile, Miles is watching the game, the one that he was supposed to be playing. You can see in his eyes, he wanted to be there. 

"I'm sorry, you should be playing with your teammates." You say to him softly. "Nope, I'm right where I am supposed to be with my girls." He squeezed your hand as you nod.

[acefiree]

𝗯𝗮𝘆! 𝗹𝗲𝗼𝗻𝗮𝗿𝗱𝗼 | the farm ⁽ ¹ ⁾ ( summary )

Leonardo ✷ Alaska ( pining friends ) MASTERLIST 2012! – BAYVERSE!

ᕦ(๏益๏)ᕥ: After the Kraang invaded New York city. Alaska and her family of misfits go to April’s childhood home on the farm to lick their wounds after Splinter is thrown into the sewer, leaving everyone to question if he is alive or not. With Leonardo being hurt, no one knew what to do. Alaska and Raphael spent most of their time watching over the turtle in blue, hoping he’d wake soon. (third pov, turtle anatomy, pining like a damn idiot, Raph being the big softy we know he is, spidergirl persona, all characters are 18+, NSFW scenes, and Leo being a fucking simp.) wordcount: 1371

⁽ ² ⁾ , ⁽ ³ ⁾ , ⁽ ⁴ ⁾

  "DEAR TO WHOMEVER IT may concern if you find this journal...

     The Kraang finally did it, the stupid alien got the better of us and defeated us...Leonardo got hurt, and Master Splinter is gone, ripped away from us in the blink of an eye, and Vern was taken in the invasion...

     We fucking lost. 

     So, Raphael and Donnie made the call and we all fled the city, going to an old farmhouse my close friend, April, grew up on. 

      It was miles away from the city, a place we could all be safe in. 

     The first thing we did was take care of poor Leonardo, seeing as he was in no place to take care of himself, the fearless leader unaware of the world around him anymore...

     I made sure to keep a close eye on him, swearing not to leave his side for too long, wanting to make sure he was okay and still breathing as I waited for him to wake up. I was doing a good job of it so far, but I would be doing a much better job if the other three brothers would stop hovering over me.

     At first, I thought they were only hanging around because they wanted to watch over Leo as well, but I soon found out he wasn't their only concern. 

     It was me...

     Raphael was the worst of his brothers, and kept a constant vigil over me and Leo...there were even times the red-clad turtle would have to practically drag me away to my room and force me to sleep...and sometimes, he'd even make me eat.

      Then there was Michelangelo. He would often goof around and try to get me outside to help with the farm chores, even going as far as forcing me to feed the animals – but mostly he just wanted to goof around and cause trouble...

     And while all this was taking place, Donatello decided to build a lab in the barn, trying to create a mutagenic medicine to heal Leo as Casey kept him company...However, in Donnie's case, I think he'd prefer to be alone rather than have the Jones hovering over his shoulder 24/7 asking questions that would even have me annoyed.

      April kept herself busy, cleaning the house and making sure we all stayed fed, and up to date on what was happening in the city. I know deep down that she was just trying to keep her mind off things and kill the need to chase a story.

      I miss New York, our Sensei...and Leonardo...

     Hopefully, he will recover, and I will finally get to get over this guilt I feel, and we can all go home...if there's even a home to go back to.

     But life, as Master Splinter would say, must continue on.

     ALASKA'S MOSS EYES WERE glazed, and her mind was foggy, her hand wrapped around a tattered rag tightly as she stood beside the bed, watching the two terrapins lower Leonardo down into the springy mattress. She blinked once. Twice. And even a third time as she tried to blink away at the new reality she was suddenly living.

     As Raphael and Donatello stepped away to give her room, she took a slow step forward, her eyes set on Leo's relaxed cataleptic face as it stared back at her haughtily. She lifted a steady hand, running the rag over his skin. The once vibrant olive color no longer looked as if it held any life to it, his skin looking an ashen green and littered in dark hues in what she guessed was the equivalent of a bruise for a turtle.

     Her heart tightened as she cleaned his bare face – a face she had always dreamt of seeing without his tattered blue mask.

     The ebony-haired girl hated that the first time she got to see his face again, was when he was unconscious and unaware of his surroundings.

     As she continued to clean the comatose leader, Donnie worked in the back as he set up a makeshift IV line for his older brother. Alaska's eyes flickered to the genius as he lifted Leo's hand and stuck an IV in the largest vein, placing tape over the tube to secure it. His golden gaze caught the curious look on her face, and he was quick to soothe her curiosity.

     "This will keep him hydrated – it's an infusion of fluids through a 'drip'...It should help him heal faster." Donnie explained as he slipped into a ramble, spewing information as he went back to checking the IV bag and line, "I would much rather have him in a tub full of water, but with our size, a human tub won't work. This will have to do for now,"

     Alaska nodded numbly once he was done info dumping (a thing he often did under stress) before turning to look back at Leo from her place on the bed, her shoulders curving forward, and her bottom lip being brought in between her teeth. The taste of dried blood from her previous chewing danced over her taste buds, but it didn't really disgust her by the taste. Blood was something she had become quite acquainted with over the past few days.

     "Will he wake up?" April's soft voice came from the bedroom's threshold as she looked on, Casey standing only a few inches away as he tried to comfort his girlfriend.

     Donnie hummed as he finished up making Leo as comfortable as he could, "His injuries are pretty severe, and from what I can see, he sustained some trauma to the head. He seems to be in a vegetative state, but I can't know without running proper tests..."

     Alaska frowned, growing questions forming in her gaze as it traveled over Leo's body, looking at the large crack in his plastron. She felt terrible he was in this state, and she felt like it was all her fault. She continued to chew her lip as she went back to cleaning the soot from his face, the rag following the long-faded scar on the right side of his face.

      Even on the brink of death, he still looked so pretty...

     After a long pause of silence, the atmosphere in the room nearly suffocating with how solemn it felt, the others left her alone with the leader — well, at least, Alaska thought she was alone.

     She placed the rag down as her fingers curled into a tight fist and her nails dug into her palm. She squeezed so hard, she was sure blood would soon trickle from her skin. 

     Why did it have to be Leo? Why did he have to risk himself for me? Why was this hurting so bad to the point I wanted to break something? Her thoughts screamed as she clamped her eyes shut, trying to block them out. 

     A heavy three-fingered hand on Alaska's shoulder had her tensing and she snapped her head around. Two different shades of green mixed together as she locked eyes with her best friend, Raphael. The quick-tempered brother observed her with a look she had never seen on him before. A look that nearly had her breaking. In that moment neither one of them had to speak, a silent understanding passing through their eyes.

     She wondered how long he was going to stand there, but nevertheless, she appreciated the company.

      Her mouth curved into a soft smile that didn't meet the color of her eyes as she lifted a hand to place over his, her silent way of saying it will be okay before she turned back to Leonardo and leaned closer, and went back to cleaning his face so there was no more dried blood and dirt.

     Raphael tracked her movements with a guarded look on his face, emerald gaze holding a certain softness he didn't even realize was pushing its way through. His somber mood kept him silent, though questions about the events that took place after the invasion played on the tip of his tongue. He knew now wasn't the time to poke or prod the younger woman, seeing as she had already been through so much in the past twenty-four hours.

     They all have.

     So, he kept himself quiet as he allowed her this time to care for Leo.

     And that day, the heaviness in her heart never left, but she was grateful for the shadow of the turtle who never left her side as they took turns caring for the leader.

[afrenchaugurey]

I finally ended my translation of the 3rd Chapter of my fic' Caribbean Blue ... Tina and her team "land" in Port au Prince and begin their investigations.

An excerpt below, and full (long) chapter on AO3 following the link

Idées préconçues

Superstitions dangereuses

Malhabiles défenses

Suddenly, the whirling was gone. She was there, on her feet, in the middle of an unknown room very far from home, her fingers still gripping the worn hat’s edge. Tina scanned the place with care, the same way their creatures did when they discovered a new environment.

Afterward, she took a few seconds to close her eyes and recover from the trip. Portkeys weren’t her favourite manner to travel –a true understatement. It always ended with her feeling nauseous, dazed, her stomach flying up at the back of her throat. That was why she preferred to use apparition, by far . Unfortunately, in the current circumstances, the choice wasn’t hers, they had to act quickly.

When she opened her eyes, her gaze had become only flames again. She was now just determination. The besotted woman was gone, relegated deep inside her brain, deep inside her heart – warming it with every beat, but waiting for more propitious moments to get back on the top of things. In this foreign country, presently in a major crisis, she embodied again Chief Porpentina Goldstein, the highly qualified team leader, meticulous, professional and self-confident, on the features of her commander’s unshakeable mask, at least . Because, under the artificial varnish, crouched in the shadows, persisted a network of cracks and that permanent feeling of remaining an impostor.

Setting her posture back upright, she let her eyes linger on her squad once more. All of them seemed to have dealt better with the trip than she had. Good . They didn’t have a spare second, she intended to solve the case as soon as possible, and to clear all responsibilities up, no matter what, or whom, they were.

After only a few –  too short  – moments, Tina felt a heat wave washing over her, giving her vaguely the impression that she was suffocating, her head now growing heavier for a different reason, without any link with the transportation. Without any potential doubt, she stayed abroad – in a very peculiar place – and far from the wintery temperatures that had stated the tempo of her early day. She already missed them, even –  maybe  – the exasperating wind.

Out of habit, she quickly checked that only wizards surrounded her and transfigurated her clothes, trading them off for a lighter blouse and looser slacks, her coat changing into a wide and long linen tunic, floating around her. She ended her transformation by whispering a cooling charm. Probably relieved to see their supervisor put herself at ease, her team members mimicked her in a blink of an eye.

At the same time, the Head Auror discreetly verified that the passenger who had travelled in her pocket hadn’t been affected by their swirling crossing. The fact was that Delia dealt with portkeys to perfection, better than she did. It was – likely – linked to natural selection, and habituation, as consequences of her husband’s never-ending journeys. She shook her head to the thought, ashamed –  just a smidge  – that a niffler had outperformed her.

[ramcharantitties]

Bandook Meri Layla

Chapter 5

Layla tapped her foot on the wooden leg of the chair.

Tak, tak, tak.

It alternated the sound of hands in the clock set upon her piano. Her velvety gloves were dusty, so was her smooth, warm ruby skirt.

Tak, tak tak.

Richard gulped at the sense of eerie silence in the bright blue room. He felt as if she was going to kill him right now. There were a lot of options for her to kill him right now. Stab him with the heels. Strangle by the gloves. Throw the inappropriately large clock on his head. But these were- what she called cheap methods to kill him. She wasn’t a tired wife. The only way to kill him through her ways was to shoot the just reloaded pistol in her hand.

Layla sighed. “He isn’t some super soldier with supernatural powers. Just a guy with trauma. Can we stop obsessing over him already? Just find and kill him”

Richard rubbed his temples. “Layla, I know, but he is smart. Ram broke through our security in the hotel, he saved you, and escaped from this place. Escaped through the 200 people armed. It’s not gonna be easy to just find and kill him”

Layla rocked on her chair, her head titled backwards. "Find me the list of everyone who attended that exhibition."

--------------

The sun was bright and Ram was sweating when he reached the city. Laila's place was far from the city, but not avoidable. He wondered if it would be better to go to his own place or escape somewhere else. Ram has started to understand what Layla thinks. If she really wanted to harm him, his house would have burnt down by now. Ram decided to play a game with Layla, and took the risk. He entered his own home.

Babai sat there, in his chair, his head in his hands. "Babai?" Ram croaked out. The old man's head snapped up, relieved to hear his voice. "Raju!" He exclaimed, rushing to him. "Where have you been?" He asked frantically. Ram sat on his bed, taking a deep breath. "Layla kidnapped me" he muttered. "What?" Babai were confused. "For two days?" He interrogated further. Ram turned to Babai. "Two?" He asked, looking at the calendar. "You've been gone for two days now. I didn't want to make a police report, worrying it might hinder your investigation" babai said.

Ram nodded his head. Layla was easy to be caught in now, as he knew where she was and what her business was. But to think of Layla to be so easy going was not on his list. Besides, she could turn up on his door to finish him and everyone he knew in a moment. Ram breathed, sitting back on his bed. His shoulders hurt, his back aching. Ram needed to take a bath. He sighed, picking his diary, when his stomach grumbled. He got up.

Akhtar knocked on Ram's door when Ram was fast asleep. Even he doesn't remember when he passed out. There was a cooked pan of rice in his kitchen, untouched. Ram forgot to eat. Akhtar slowly opened the door, to find an unconscious Ram on the table. Akhtar's heart was filled with butterflies and joy. His Anna was back. "Bhaiya?" Akhtar cautiously tip-toed in the room, but Ram jolted up from sleep, looking around. "Akhtar" he mumbled, rubbing his dreamy eyes. "How have you been? Babai told me you're back." Akhtar asked, kneeling close to Ram. Ram nodded in return, getting up from his chair. Akhtar stood up too.

"I'm gonna wash my face, can you serve two plates of rice for us?" Akhtar's face lit up. He nodded with a smile and rushed to set two plates up. About ten minutes later, Ram and Akhtar sat down to eat. Akhtar mentioned his curiosity and concern when Ram went missing. Ram nodded, hoping to reply but couldn't. He didn't understand what to do. "Jenny informed me- somehow, that she is meeting a friend tonight. She wants us to come" Akhtar said, stuffing his face. Ram followed, hungry.

"How many friends?"

"one"

"woman?"

"I think"

Ram smirked. Jenny was calling Ram and Akhtar on a double date. They were soon done eating, with Akhtar finishing the left over rice too. Ram surfed through his diary meanwhile. It was stressful how much he wanted to capture Layla back then, but despite that, Ram helped Akhtar get ready for the date.

It was about an hour later, when the sun has started peeking its vibrant orange when Ram hopped off Akhtar's bike. It was a high end, English café in the heart of Delhi. The outsides were decorated in white, green and pink, with young saplings planted by the door. Lanterns were already lit, a hue of brown and golden casting over the walls. Ram could see the big, doe eyes of Akhtar looking for Jenny. He smiled, wondering who Jenny's friend could be. When he stepped on the flight of stairs of the cafe, the same feeling of exhibition filled him in. He felt a presence- someone who shouldn't be there. Ram looked around as both the men made their way in, when Jenny appeared in his view. He smiled, exhaling, only to see a very familiar face sitting near the window.

------------------------------------------------------------------------

taglist- @dumdaradumdaradum @nerdreader @vijayasena @yehsahihai @ramayantika

[myhatisblue]

I started this Mills thing forever ago.  I did what I could with it since it was already pretty long but it does just kinda stop.  Least there’s some fun lore here.

In an ideal world Gaspar Mills would be at home. Curled up in blankets, as the smell of a slow cooked stew permeated the air, and the television showed and sang the roars of a kaiju or two.  Left alone disconnected, and at peace.  

But it’s been a while since he’d gotten the freedom to even go home. His most recent job went bad, sure an abstract horror laid slaughtered… But not before Mills found himself gutted, and internals spread across the floor. The beast was arrogant, its twisting limbs and multiple mouths came in close to enjoy the meal. Close enough to touch, and stupid enough to forget to make absolutely sure he was passed out. Regardless of the nature of the creature it was just meat and bone… It cried out the same, a broken form trapped in skin it never consented to. Craving to be unwound and set free.  A request the King of roaches would deny over and over again on any other day.  It was a step too far, a peak that wasn’t easily backed down from.  

But the madness brought on while at the brink of death drives all sense away. Before he fully grasped his action the room was coated in red fibers of meat and spikes bone.  And in the middle of it all a flower bloomed from what hadn’t been cast away to the walls or floors.  A victory yes, but what remained of Mills was barely held together. Death would finally come this time, he’d be done with all of this. The world faded and nothingness gripped him once again.

“Can’t believe you finally did it.”

Even in death there was no escaping that voice. It was as much a part of his mind as he was.

“Just let me fucking die in peace Kenneth.”

“Man, you wish Gaspar. You already know there’s no getting off this ride.  Within the hour the monster hunting bastards will be scooping up your sorry corpse.”

“It’s Mills asshole… and as if there’s even enough there to put back together…”

“God you’re being dramatic as fuck again.  You might have earned the cute little title of ‘King of roaches’, but you ate the heart of the eldritch lord of flesh.  You really think a few missing organs are going to stay gone for long?”

“...Eldritch lord?!”

“Oh, ha wow that just slipped out. Woops.”

“Fuck off Ken. You just like dumping shit like that one me when I can’t get rid of you.  Then refuse to say anything beyond it.”

“To be fair I’ve already told you that I make up half of the shit I tell you. If you get stuck on one thing or another that’s your fault.”

“Urgh… Can you atleast give me a hint about what the flower was?”

“Say please and maybe I’ll consider it.”

“...”

“Come on Mills.”

“Ugh.. Please Kenneth tell me what the hell that meat flower was.”

“Making something new is complex, even more so when it’s alive. Why wouldn’t you start small? Wouldn’t have pinned you down for someone who’d spread flowers though.”

“I didn’t plan on doing that, I just did what it’s flesh wanted… And I guess that was what it wanted to be.”

“Sure it was.”

“... I’m not taking the bait.  If I ask what you're implying you're just going to say ‘oh nothing’ in that stupid tone.”

“That sounds about right.  Well it seems like our time is running out, but I’ll give you this.  Keep doing anything and you’ll get better at it.  Though I’m not sure that’s what you actually want this time.”

It all went quiet after that, and soon the world saw fit to drag Mills back to consciousness. The ceiling was white, and mumbling voices filled the air.  They seemed like they wanted his attention, but it all faded into background noise. His body felt wrong, the placement of joints and internals…  It wasn’t right, but just like every other lump of flesh it could be altered. With an unsteady hand he reached towards his stomach. Skin parted, and it wasn’t long before the  voices around changed from murmurs to out right screeches.  No matter how much he tried to correct the mistakes it was never perfect.  The pain was growing, still he tried to fix what was broken. Until his arms were grabbed and an all too familiar needle was stabbed and injected into his neck. Instantly the world faded and not even that cold nothingness could take him.

By the time Mills was able to open his eye again a man was sitting next to him reading.  He was wearing a Navy blue suit,  with a black dress shirt underneath.  The gray hair and tired eyes spoke more to the amount of stress he deals with day to day than his actual age.  Mills had asked once expecting him to be well over 50 only to find out he was only 39. His name was Harris, and he was the poor fool stuck trying to keep Mills in line. A job that likely only added to the amount of gray hair growing on harris’ head.

After letting his eye wander between Harris and the ceiling, Mills tried to pull himself up out of bed.  It was only then that he became aware that his hands were currently restrained.  6 black bands that were about an inch thick had been placed on his arms.

“I… Pissed off the higher ups.. didn’t I?”

His voice was shaky, and pathetic but it was enough for Harris to put down his book. He looked as if he was about to scream at Mills but took a breath and managed to only let out a sigh.

“I don’t know what you expected… You gave the medical team the scare of a lifetime. What were you even trying to do”

“My insides… they don’t feel right…  I just wanted to fix it.”

“Sneckdraw had suspected it was something like that. Give me a second. I wrote down a message from him.”

Harris pulled out his phone, making sure to mimic the emotionless tone of the demon hunter Mills knew all too well.

‘Organs that undergo complete evisceration often grow back imperfectly.  I can only conclude that this process will hold a heavier weight for one so engaged in the subject matter.  All you can do is move forward, bear the weight of your choices, and do better to avoid them in the future. With time it will fade.’

Mills couldn’t help but scoff, that sounded like something he’d say. Most of the time Sneckdraw says nothing, he just stares and leaves everyone around him on edge.  But on rare occasions he’ll speak with extended detail. Drawn out words, spoken in a deep monotone, slow and deliberate. Always unsettling in their delivery.

While Harris couldn’t capture it fully he got the gist.  Although Mills couldn’t be sure if the impression was actually intended, or just how a message from sneckdraw naturally ends up sounding.

“That sounds like a lot of words to just say that it’s normal…”

“There was nothing normal about that scene Mills… What was that?”

“Guess you saw me after all that huh…’

“Yeah, I did.”

No escape from this conversation… The grim look Harris had been wearing since the start of all this was evident. It was a genuine concern, the kind that always knocked Mills off kilter.  He could bear the pain and what it did to him, it was easy enough to ignore it, and bury it deep within.  But being reminded that it wasn’t normal, that it wasn’t just fine to keep going like that… It shattered the poorly put together illusion everytime. Mills would have to be honest, or he’d never leave the medical wing.

“...You know how I ask people to avoid physical contact?”

“Yeah, I remember you saying their bodies were too loud.”

“It’s not just that… Their flesh speaks to me.”

“It what?”

“‘The skin is a prison’, and every single living thing I’ve been forced to have contact with wants to be set free. Everytime I’d tell them to fuck off.  I was out of options, so that was me giving it what it wanted…”

“Why haven’t you brought that part up before?”

“Cause the list of possible solutions can only really end with me locked in a cell somewhere for being a problem.”

“That’s the paranoia speaking Mills. We’re here to support you, but we need to know what the problems are before we can help solve them. Has this gotten worse over time?”

“Na, since I woke up it’s always just been there.”

“That’s good to hear at the very least.”

A phone rings, and it only takes a glance at Harris to know what was coming next.

“I have to head out for now,  I’ll be back later tonight. If you need me before then you know my number.”

“How am I supposed to make a phone call when my arms are tied down…?”

“Just shout, someone will be around to check on you.”

“Well at least tell me what the armbands are about before you fuck off.”

“Ah right, they should help you stay grounded and stay focused on where you are. It’s a better answer than just wrapping your arms in cloth over and over.”

“Right…”

Again Mills was left alone to stew with his thoughts… While he was sure he could escape the restraints if he put his mind to it, what would be the point?  The compound the medical wing was in was deep underground. He wouldn’t get far before he was thrown back in bed.  

At the very least he would be able to rest his eye for a while. Or at least that would have been his plan if not for a new guest slipping into his room.

“Talk about Déjà vu, at the very least you're looking better than last time I crashed your hospital room.”

Brandom Lewis was always easy to pick out of a crowd, his fashion choices were unique to say the least.   Tending to favor bright colours and floral designs, and a pair of orange toned glasses he was hard to miss.

Brandon took a long look at Mills, getting really close to his face. Unintentionally showing off the other unique feature the man hid.   Perhaps man was the wrong word, because he was more accurately described as a highly complex hivemind of insects piloting a human corpse. And under the right circumstances liked getting annoyingly close to other peoples faces. Letting them enjoy the sight of his collective squirming ever so slightly beneath his skin.

After evidently enjoying making Mills visibly uncomfortable, he set on freeing his hands and crashed on the seat next to his bed. Mills took the opportunity to rub his wrists and stretch out his stiff arms.

“They’re gonna have to go back on before I leave, but may as well enjoy the freedom while you can. Though between you and me it’s stupid to even bother with them.”

“I agree but the illusion of control is a hell of a thing.”

“Don’t I know it! So Kid, how are you doing? Last time I actually saw you, you were still a twig by comparison. Faye mentioned that you were going to work on bulking up. Didn’t expect it to happen so quickly.”

“You know how time goes, months in the other dimension, are days out in the real world.”

“Mhm, I’ve heard new blood is gonna start being trained there in the next year or two.  Once the nerds make sure people won’t blow up randomly after prolonged exposure from being there.”

“They don’t mention shit like that to me, building materials just start showing up.”

“Huh I figure they’d just have you make those kinds of things.”

“Things I make there have a minor habit of collapsing into meat if my brain gets too fuzzy.”

“Ahh with the millions invested in equipment, I guess that would be a bit of a problem.”

“Millions??”

“Oh yeah there’s some serious money being poured into you. No pressure or anything.”

“So you're saying I probably shouldn’t make the ground under them collapse no matter how funny it would be.”

“Nahhh do it anyway, It’ll be great for you.”

“Yeah I’ll get to enjoy a few years without having to worry about taxes, or bills. It’ll just all be in a nice cell custom made to fuck me…  Now why are you even here Brandon?”

“I’ve got the day off, and didn’t have much planned beyond doing dailies and that's easy enough to do here.”

“Dailies…?  I assume that it's related to the game that you’re always playing? Heard Faye ranting about how you dropped a few grand on that thing.”

“She just doesn’t have the backing of the gatcha gods.  And if we’re being real here what else am I gonna spend money on?  Housing, internet and food is covered already, and I can’t exactly go out and party like the old days.  If I drop a few bucks here and there investing in the things I enjoy, what's the big problem?”

“It sounded more like gambling when Faye was telling me about it, and pretty shitty investment if that’s the case.”

“Says the dude who spent hundreds on original godzilla posters…”

“That’s art!”

“Riiiight…”

“You have to have seen them, I know people around here are always breaking into my house and bugging the shit out of it! Shits real nice looking, it’s peak classic poster art.”

“Information related to your house is classified, But I have been keeping up on your reports.  I enjoyed the ones that just degraded into calling people assholes or ‘mega dicks’ for 10 pages.”

“Well normally I have to get that shit done the second I finish a case.  Can’t blame me for still being a little pissed about the whole thing. Not like I really get why I’m even doing it, hell I’m shocked you’re even reading them.  Kinda assume they got tossed in a bin and thrown into a cabinet somewhere.”

“Nah, I read all of it. What might be some ‘crackhead’ in one of your reports could likely be related to some bigger fish in another game. So I might not be able to smash some skulls like the old days, but I still get a little rush from nailing down someone trying their best to be ignored.”

“I get it, I just didn’t really see myself doing so much deskwork.”

“Well you’ve managed to piss someone off given those arm bands so you might be doing a lot more of it if you keep this up.”

“Huh, Harris told me they were just replacing the wrappings I used to use.”

“Kid, you have got to work on your senses.  Skipping on the magic studies just cause you’ve got bad blood for it is gonna screw you.”

“I’ve been working on it, but it just never clicks.  Come on what the hell does magic have to do with the bands?”

“Try and take one off.”

Stares were shared over a brief silence before a loud electric pop filled the air. Even the slightest movement Mills tried to make against the bands ended in a sharp shock to his arms, while they stayed clung exactly where they were placed..

“Shit!”

“Pfft God you should see your face, kid.  Priceless.”

“Not fucking cool!  What if they get caught on something or someone rips them off mid fight?”

“It’s magic and set to protect solely against your interference. That’s talking mentally and physically. So even asking someone to remove them or even replacing your arms is going to lead to a lot of fun results.”

“Fuck they can do that?”

“They got your blood, name, and pretty much anything else they’d ever need to nail any spell or curse on you. You ought to be happy, it's not worse than a few shock collars.”

“Ugh… I killed the beast, while the details might have gotten a little messy but the results were still good.”

“The higher ups will always see you as a danger to humanity, giving them more reasons to think that lands you in early retirement.”

“Speaking from experience?”

“You know it…

Ah crud, look at the time.  I remembered some stuff I need to handle before night rolls around.  Show me your hands, so I can lock them back up.”

“Fine. But before you go, any idea how much longer I’ve got here?”

“Given the rumblings I’ve heard you’re gonna be stuck with a week of observation. So at least you’ll have tons of time to write the report for that last job.”

“Great…”

Mills let his arms be locked to the bed he was already stuck in. Without much else to do he could really only try and sleep.  Least that would kill some time.

[sparrowsworkshop]

“Find Our Way” by OneWingedSparrow

Fic Summary: Set not too long after leaving Syngorn / rediscovering Byroden. Worried about money troubles, teenage Vex'ahlia vents to her twin brother Vax'ildan. Vax soon realizes that Vex's stress comes from a deeper place than expected. Main Tags: Vax’ildan & Vex’ahlia, Vex & Vax & Trinket, Pre-Canon, Before Vox Machina, Before Main Plot of Kith and Kin, Emotional Baggage, Emotional Hurt / Comfort, Siblings, Money Trouble Read on AO3 Reblogs are appreciated! ~ The purse jingled loudly, a testament to how much air indwelled the nearly threadbare pouch. Had the purse been plump, the melody would have been less distinct. But it made a clatter rather than a clink when Vex plopped it on the table—a worrisome sound, all too familiar, like sharp, sudden pain from an old wound that should have healed over by now. “All we have left,” Vex said, evenly. Crosslegged on the bench, Vax paused from sharpening his Flametongue dagger. The other two daggers, their blades glinting in the candlelight, rested on the table beside the whetstone and the accusatory purse. “How much?”

“One more night in this inn, at most.” She wrapped her arms around herself. “I really thought you’d be able to find work in this blasted city of yours. Yet, here we are once again. High and dry.”

“The city is not the problem,” Vax said quietly.

“They judge you here,” Vex accused, glaring. “Don’t think I haven’t noticed. I know why you haven’t gotten hired, why I can’t get haggle anyone’s prices down. They look at us and see bastard children. Unwanted. Unrespectable. Wandering vagabonds that strayed too far from a home they never belonged to. All because of how we look, how we carry ourselves. Syldor would laugh at us if he saw us now, living up to everything he expected.” “And I would laugh at him,” Vax insisted. He tossed the dagger aside, narrowly missing the candle, and stood. At his full height, he had a good two inches over her. “I never cared what that man thought of us then, nor do I care now. Whatever twisted words he shackled us by, they will not follow us here, Vex’ahlia.”

Her mouth twisted. “They already have!” she exclaimed, eyes flashing. “No matter how far away we are from Syngorn, the prejudice follows. I knew that before we came here, Vax’ildan. But you were so confident we would find work in this place, and I trusted your judgment, so I followed your lead. But now it’s been weeks and nothing has happened. No word, no work, not even a stupid look of despicable pity. What little you pickpocket isn’t enough to live off, much less feed a hungry bear, and I can’t….” She clenched her fists, inhaling deeply as if about to unleash another flurry of words.

Behind her, Trinket groaned, distressed by her outburst.

Vax watched conflicting emotions flicker over his sister’s face, all in a split second. At last, Vex seemed to think better of a further rant, for she spun on her heel and pressed against Trinket instead. She slid, almost comically, to sit upon the floor, while her outspread arms sank into Trinket’s fur in the nearest equivalent to a hug she could give such a massive critter.

Worriedly, Trinket sniffed her head.

“I can’t do anything,” Vex yelled in response.

With that, she buried her face in Trinket’s fur.

Vax released a very long breath, feeling wrinkles crease his forehead. With the silent grace of a practiced thief, he tiptoed just behind her. Trinket eyed him, but Vax raised an eyebrow back, and his nephew snorted, granting permission.

Taking his time, Vax sank to his knees behind Vex. Carefully, as if testing a suspicious wall for traps, Vax gradually leaned over her back and tentatively moved his arms around her sides. When she did not cringe or shove him off, he hugged her, closing his eyes as the feather in her hair tickled his nose. His hug was gentle, echoing his relief of her acceptance, but tight and relentless like his heart now clenching with worry. A grumble escaped her throat, sounding not unlike one of Trinket’s; telltale proof she was wrestling back tears. A fact no one in all of Tal’Dorei, save Vax alone, would likely ever know.

Something caught in his throat too. He sighed into her braid. “We’ll be okay, Stubby,” Vax said softly. “I’m going to look after us. Far better than he did. You know this, don’t you?”

Vex made no reply, but Trinket snuffled, as if voicing his agreement. Thusly encouraged, Vax pressed on, his confidence strengthening the longer he spoke.

“Coin or no coin. Work or no work. Wanted or not wanted. We’ll find our way. We always do.”

“Mmmmmgghhh,” Vex mumbled incoherently.

His mouth twitched with a smile. “I’m sorry, I don’t speak bear.”

She shifted, pulling slightly away from Trinket’s side. “I wish we didn’t have to find our way,” Vex repeated tiredly, casting a glance over her shoulder. “I wish...we were already there.”

“I know,” he murmured back. “I know.”

They were quiet for a while, while the persistent candle grew lesser and lesser. The hardwood floor was uncomfortable, and grew colder as nightfall approached, but neither the twins nor Trinket felt compelled to move. In odd, unspoken solidarity, they remained, as if staying together granted them ongoing, impregnable protection against the uncaring outside world.

At length, Vax rested his chin on his sister’s shoulder. “They’re wrong about us, you know.”

“Hmm?” Vex yawned.

“They’re wrong,” he said again, catching her yawn before continuing. “The ones who look down on us for how we look or what we do. They’re wrong, plain and simple. We’ve got something great, you and I. And we will find our way. No matter what they think of us.”

Vex tipped her head against his. “Always?”

“And no matter what happens.”

She hummed thoughtfully. “Then I suppose I should believe you, darling.”

At that, he had to grin. “As ever, dear sister.” ~

[may--hawk]

fields of gold (ineffable remix)

II. Fields of Gold - Sting

Will you stay with me / will you be my love? I swear in the days still left / we’ll walk in fields of gold

They’ve had a perfectly lovely day in the fields outside of Paris. They’re both in town for work. Crowley’d shown up Sunday morning and suggested that they go for a picnic. The dear had already packed a basket. How could Aziraphale say no? They joined the troupes of families headed out from the city into the countryside to take in the air. They find themselves a little patch of field far from any others, and they just - sit there, talking, for hours, Crowley basking in the sun, Aziraphale trying, and failing, not to stare at him fondly.

It’s early summer, late afternoon, almost evening, really, a light breeze keeping the heat from being too bothersome, and the light is slanting yellow and heavy across the fields, lighting up the grass like gold, sulfur-yellow, something bright and beguiling. Crowley’s reclined in the grass, hat and coat and shoes off, and as he’s in the middle of saying something clever about Manet, he yawns, suddenly, and stretches, legs long and spread carelessly, one arm thrown up over his head. Aziraphale can’t help but watch, breathless, lips parted a little: the long line of him glorious in the sun.

“What would you say to some dinner, angel?” He says, turning towards Aziraphale. The families are streaming out towards the dusty road, heads bowed: the children tired out; the adults hot, irritated, headed back home to the stifling, dirty city, to their hum-drum lives. The sun’s setting, almost set, soon it will be nightfall in this field, the air cool and hushed, Crowley close enough to touch, and Aziraphale can so easily imagine turning towards him and reaching out -

Aziraphale stutters, says he has to be getting on, really, can’t stay here, lovely time, has to go.

“But the sun’s about to set. You’re going to miss the good bit,” Crowley says, turning his head towards Aziraphale. His sunglasses on, eyes unreadable. Aziraphale knows that means, Stay. Feeling a perfect beast, he says, “I really can’t, Crowley. These peasants won’t bless themselves.” All perfectly true statements.

“Right,” Crowley says. “Course not. On with you.” He flaps a hand like he doesn’t care, and Aziraphale, heart sinking, turns to go. He steps through the high grass, leaves Crowley behind. But before he loses Crowley entirely from his sight, he turns around, and Crowley -

Crowley, the sun bright and sharp behind him - one of his stars? Aziraphale doesn’t know, they’ve never talked about it - is sitting up, his mouth a thin straight line, watching him leave.

One day, Aziraphale promises, one day I will stay.

[amateurd18]

Hii Ami!! Secret Santa here!! Happy Friday!! May your weekend be a long and restful one!! ✨

It was your friends birthday? Well, happy late birthday to them!! 🥳✨ you can never go wrong with Mexican food!!

Ooooo, you’re studying in Madrid? That’s so cool!! What are you studying, if you don’t mind me asking? I had a close friend study abroad in Spain for a semester and absolutely loved it there!! I totally feel you about wanting to move to London!! It sounds like a pretty nice place to live based on the things I hear about it. I remember when I was studying abroad, my friends and I planned our spring break trip to the UK for five days, but due to COVID, we got pulled from our program before we were even able to step foot on the plane there. So I still have that desire to visit the UK for that reason alone lol.

Same here!! I love sweet things, to an extent!! I don’t eat as much surgery things as I did when I was younger!! But when I do, cheesecake is the key to my heart!! Lol.

Thank you!! As of right now, all the owls are packed away from when I decorated my apartment for Christmas. After we introduce ourselves properly, I can definitely send you some photos of my prized ones!! They range from very tiny figures to relatively large ones!! I’m pretty proud of it!!

Lego does count as a collection item lol!! They’re so cool!! I really like the aspect of having to build them (that’s pretty obviously lol, but it truly is therapeutic in a sense!!). Hopefully one day, you can start that collection!! Is there one particular Lego set you would love to have?

Speed Round Answers: Movie/TV Shows? I wasn’t sure if you were asking if I preferred movies or tv shows lol?! I’d probably say tv shows because you can learn more about the characters and their stories through the lens of a series rather than their one dimensional aspects cut short for a movie!! Some of the most recent tv shows I’ve watched are Heartstopper, Young Royals, Wednesday (Netflix cancelled this show after the first season, and I will never forgive them for it!! It’s called The Society and I definitely recommend it if you haven’t watched it already!!) I’ve been rewatching a kids show named Chowder on Hulu for the nostalgia factor lol. Movies/books? Hmmmm… I like books, but I can appreciate a good movie!! I’d say the best book I read this year has been One Last Stop by Casey McQuiston. I highly recommend it!! Who doesn’t love sci-fi lesbian strangers to lovers!!!? Fav. season? The transitional period between summer and fall!! To me, that’s just the perfect weather!! Not too hot or humid, yet not too cold!! Beaches/Mountains? I’d probably live by the beach because I went to college up in the mountains and when it gets cold, it gets cold!!! I’ll risk living around the sand than anything else. City/countryside? I’ve always lived relatively close to the city, but I think it would be nice to get away from it all. Have my own home in a nice large area. But not too big that someone could be living in my home and I wouldn’t know it lol.

Here are more speed round questions, my dear!! Do you have a favorite piece(s) of comfort clothing? (Sweater? T-shirt? Shoes?) What are three things you know you can’t live without? Do you play/enjoy any games (whether that be video games, board games, card games, etc). 🎄✨

Helloo! How is your weekend going? Mine's been fab yay!

I'm doing a dual master - an MBA with a master in business analytics. Why I chose insanity is still unclear, but oh well. It's been hectic but good so no complaints.

I'm so sad that you missed London coz of covid, but here's hoping you can make it there soon. ✨

As far as the Lego goes, i have a long-ass list of very random ones i want. So in no particular order- the entire city collection, the Harry Potter castle, the life-size r2d2 from star wars and the formula 1 Ferrari cars. Is it obvious yet that i love really random stuff? 😂

I love your speed round answers, and I'm putting one last stop on my Christmas read list. Fav clothing: nothing specific, just track pants and a tee / shorts if it's summer. Jeans if i need to be presentable. Three things i can't live without: ooh that's hard. My phone, an internet connection and my earphones. I love board games! Monopoly is a household favourite, as is Uno when we're traveling. Do you have a favourite board game?

More questions: I'm assuming you speak Spanish, but any other languages you speak or want to learn? Do you have celeb crushes? Comfort movie that you'd watch at any point? Do you have a favourite Christmas food?