#And I was near the end godamnit

[camscendants]

When you play a game for 9 hours straight and it crashes and deletes your save file

[fantasiac]

this is less of a theory, and more of a headcanon

(Deltarune Spoiler Warning (go play it godamnit, its free and amazing))

Kris made a deal with Gaster in the bunker to let Gaster control kris using their soul and make the holiday family stop spending time with the Dreemurr family so that Asriel would spend more time with Kris instead of December, Gaster made Dess dissappear, we have seen that Kris has taken extreme measures to make sure people stay (like slashing Toriel's tires) but losing dess would most likely make Asriel distance himself (as we've seen him do in Undertale, when he leaves after you try to spare him as Flowey in a nuetral run) and go to college, leaving Kris anyway, this would probably make Kris feel even more abandoned, ontop of losing Asriel anyway, the dissapearance of December would end up forcing Toriel and Asgore apart, as Asgore would be taking increasingly more extreme measures to try and find Dess (as Asgore is most likely her godfather seeing the relationship Rudy and he has), Asgore eventually getting fired and Toriel leaves him as she didn't aprove of his methods (again, we've seen this happen in Undertale), and then Kris wouldn't even be able to go back to hanging out with Noelle as she'd also be looking for Dess (looking for her sister makes logical sense, but in case it needs to be confirmed for any reason, Noelle's room is decorated with a calendar with each day being labelled the 25th because Queen based it off her search history and Noelle would probably be searching "December Holiday" online, also Spamton Sweepstakes confirms she has a blog, so asking around for sightings of December online makes sense) this action with Gaster to make their brother stay ultimately causing everyone to leave would make Kris probably never want to go near the bunker again, also when Susie scares away Monster Kid and Snowdrake, she asks "are you OK?" to Kris, kris probably looked scared or nervous around the bunker as the player is forcing them to this area with so many bad emotions, they probably looked scared enough for Susie to ask if they're alright. Kris probably shut themselves off from everyone, probably because of the "if I just don't make any more friends, I won't lose them" mentality that is pretty common in people with abandonment problems, they probably would've done it so if Gaster decides to take control of Kris whenever he feels like it, at least it can't really get much worse (also this is probably why they didn't really seem interested in becoming friends with Susie or Ralsei), and long enough that everyone eventually stopped asking if they were alright (they probably would've assumed it was because of Toriel's and Asgore's divorce) Gaster having a human soul with the power to use it's determination to create dark fountains from within a darkworld (my theory is that the bunker is a dark world) to expand his domain and threaten the darkners. (also Gaster making deals similar to Bill Cipher fits in with Spamton and Jevil, he promised them freedom (he probably promised to make them immune to being turned to stone during the Roaring or something))

this theory means that Kris has 3 layers to being controlled, Kris' own control (or lack there of) then us (the Player), then Gaster, this is why the player connects with Gaster at the start of the game, before they are interrupted by someone with a different style of speech (this theory make Kris themselves a very logical contendor, as kris would believe choices don't matter (because of the speech in the art above) and also not want to be controlled even more), and then there's Gaster, who controlls kris when The Player doesn't, like the Act options, they player can choose what to do, but neither Kris or The Player are doing it (like Hugging the Ralsei Dummy for example, you don't hald Left and walk over to the Dummy, Kris just seems to do that on their own) this would make it so Kris removing their soul and glaring at the camera mean that Kris isn't staring at The Player, but staring at Gaster, Kris would be Glaring at Gaster as a taunt for removing his control over them, and the player most likely would think Kris is looking at them because they aren't supposed to know about Gaster. now we have to address the end of chapter 2, as it seems to contradict my control layers theory, as Kris removes control from both Us and Gaster, and then procedes to make a dark fountain as if working towards Gaster's plan. there are 2 possible answers;

Kris IS working towards Gaster's plan and creating dark fountain for him as it could've been part of their deal to get rid of December, OR

Kris doesn't know that Gaster wan't more dark world and made that one to hold together the life they have left before Gaster takes it away again, in this one dark world, they can spend time with Toriel, Susie, Ralsei, and either Undyne or Asgore, there is a possibility of it being Asgore beacause maybe Toriel called him instead of Undyne as he used to be a cop and would protect Kris no matter what the cost, also a chapter with Toriel in it has a chance for Toby Fox to go more in-depth with Toriel's and Asgore's relationship, but how they acted towards eachother earlier in that day lowers the chance, and it seems like a bit early of a chapter to fix the parents in Kris's Story, so it's more likely Undyne.

The roaring would work well in Gasters favour as he is probably the King of Darkness (bc Ralsei is the Prince), he probably created Ralsei with Kris in-mind, as he planned for them to meet anyway, Also if Ralsei has been created for Kris, than why does he say he's so old, and how does he know about the Roaring? simple, Gaster probably just told Ralsei about the Roaring, and they were probably created around the same time December went missing, which seems to be a few years ago, and time could pass a little bit differently in the dark worlds, my idea is that the dark worlds take twice as long as a normal day, as in chapter 1, the whole crew is knocked out for an unexplained amount of time before Card Castle, and when they leave the dark world, it's late afternoon, but in chapter 2, kris falls asleep until noon and then spends even more time in the dark world than chapter 1 and still comes out at late noon, also Susie says "it felt like years" when talking about the differnce between Chapter 1 and 2, while it could've been a clever joke from Toby fox about how long it took to make the game, it also could've been from the time warping properties of a dark world, as this is her first time in a dark world, she would probably be experiencing some kind of time dialation? it's a bit far-fetched, but it would make Ralsei technically older than he logically should be, but we also don't know just how long he's been alone as he's only really said "so long" but it would also explain why he was so alone, is probably because Gaster left him there in the closet for so long, there is probably a connection to the Bunker like there was to the first dark world in chapter 1, and there are probably more doors to get to other dark world which explains how Ralsei got to Cyber World, but also Ralsei said "THE Door" when talking about the door in chapter 1, so who knows. Also if Gaster Created Ralsei, then he probably would've given him the power to survive in any dark world.

So in conclusion, Gaster is the Knight, but also Kris is the Knight, the cyber world and the chapter 2 cliffhanger world were created by Kris, seemingly by their own fruition, but it's probably caused by gaster in some way, and Kris doesn't actually want the Roaring, or something idk, i just felt like drawing Kris and my mind went wandering lol

[toriwakes]

Pretty Boy 187 [s.r x reader]

summary: reader finds out that her new found tumblr crush is none other than her coworker.

content warnings: she/her!reader, mentions of alcohol

a/n: hi!! i’m so happy to be posting again. i’m really proud of this, so i hope you all like it! as always, let me know if you have any requests!

convincing spencer to get tumblr was tough. not only did he hate technology, he didn’t like social media either.

“it’s gonna be fun! c’mon, please?” you’ve been bugging him about it for about a week. “spencer, please just download it. if i have to hear (y/n) whine again i’m gonna loose it.” said derek, plopping is papers on his desk. “you like it when i whine.” you teased, causing derek to flash you a toothy grin. “alright! jeez.” you clapped of joy and jumped to help spencer, but he stopped you. “no way, i’m not letting you follow me.” he kept his phone facing away from you, your arms dropping to your sides in defeat. “fine. i’ll find your account somehow.” “we’ll see about that.”

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over the next few weeks you acquired a few new followers, only one catching your eye. ‘prettyboy187’ followed you on a quiet friday afternoon. the username caught your attention at first, but when you checked is profile? that’s when you were hooked. half of his pictures were just aesthetically pleasing: outside of his window, his extreme sugary coffee, some books. but others...

it was an excerpt of a poem and his hand was holding back the pages. you doubt he meant to capture it so beautifully. just his hand was godly. you wasted no time dming him.

hey :)

how desperate did you look right now? he followed you barley an hour ago. you cant stop staring at that picture.

hello

he didn’t sound happy. well, he didn’t “sound” anything, you guys were texting. but you could feel his tone through the screen. where you overthinking this too much? you shuffled into your bed, wrapping yourself in the covers as you pondered what to say next.

i just wanted to tell you i really like your account. are you a photographer or something?

no, i’m not. my friend convinced me to get this app and i noticed people post aesthetically pleasing photos on here, so i’m just doing the same haha.

ok, well you don’t post nice pictures. at least, not that type. maybe you’d post a picture of the snow or your bed, but every now and then you’d bless the feed with a picture of you in a swimsuit. it was more for opinions on the suit than anything else.

ohh. maybe i should start doing that.

how do you mean?

oh.

that sounded like a very judge-y ‘oh’. your eyes scanned your own profile to see what he could’ve hated. there was you in your favorite red swimsuit, a picture of your computer with netflix on the screen. the rest of the posts were of the same type, so you couldn’t pinpoint what the problem was.

what is it?

no, nothing. your recent picture. that’s a nice swim suit.

oh. that’s what he meant. you practically threw your phone across the room and squealed. thank the universe that he didn’t dislike you already. you shot him another text. just like that, you had your first ever tumblr crush.

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“what’s up with you pretty girl?” derek asked when you walked into work. you supposed you still had the blush on your face when pretty boy wished you a good morning and day at work. “nothing!” you said, obviously it being something. as if on cue, spencer walked in behind you also giddy. “what, you’re both sweet on someone now?” when neither of you responded, derek laughed. “what?” emily inquired, taking her seat. “spencer and (y/n) both have a crush.” emily’s jaw dropped. “spencer has a crush?” everyone broke into laughter, jj overhearing and almost dropping her files. “why is that so surprising?” spencer defended himself, derek giving him a ‘you know the answer to that’ look. “well?what’re their names?” he pushed. you bit your tongue. you didn’t even know his name. yikes. “let’s start.” aaron called. saved by hotch. thank goodness. “this ain’t over.” derek warned the two of you. yes it was. by the end of the day morgan would’ve forgotten all about this.

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you were right like always. morgan didn’t ask anymore about it, instead offering to get drinks. you turned it down, desperate to get home and text your boy. and you did, only at 11pm.

hey, sorry it’s so late. had a long day at work.

no worries, so did i. listen, i have a question.

this boy only sent messages that would make your heart drop. with a pacing heart, you texted back.

yes?

his ‘online’ button flashes on. then he was typing. then he was deleting. it seemed like hours before he responded.

what’s your name?

godamnit. you didnt have a display name because you didn’t want anyone you knew finding your account. what’s a fake name you can use? maybe...

lila.

why did you pick spencer’s ex’s name? you don’t know. you remember being insanely jealous of her because she got to kiss spencer in the pool while you were posted outside. your crush on spencer was still very much alive, but not as much as it was with pretty boy.

that’s a pretty name.

thanks. now you have to tell me yours ;)

you’ve never been so nervous for a text conversation in your life. for some reason, the back of your head wondered what it would be like if you were texting spencer. it was just a thought, though. spencer would never say half of this stuff.

call me morgan.

oh NO. please no... you stalked his profile again, terrified that you’ve been flirting with your coworker this past month. alas, your eye caught another body picture- this time of his arm. no tattoos like derek. not to mention he was much smaller. not that that’s a bad thing. you don’t think you’d ever be able to handle derek...

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you arrived at work yet again with a blushing face. “come on, you can’t keep hiding this from me! tell me something at least!” derek whined. “okay! his name is morgan. and i know what you’re thinking, and no, it’s not you, my boy is much more attractive.” derek’s mouth formed into an ‘O’ shape in fake offense. “that’s damn near impossible. ain’t nobody prettier than derek morgan.” spencer walked in now, again with a dorky smile on his face. “spencer. (y/n)’s got a crush on-“ you jumped to cover his mouth, the sound of your crush’s name muffled. “what- hey! no fair! derek gets to know but i cant?” spencer whined. derek held his hands up and sat back down, not wanting to get you mad. smart. “three can’t keep a secret.” was all you said before sitting down to clean your workspace.

♡♥♡♥♡♥♡♥♡♥♡♥

the new highlight of your day was texting morgan. you learned several things about him; he has a job he can’t specify for personal reasons, he really wants a dog but he feels like animals hate him. you told him about your cat joel, and how they could absolutely love him. he appreciated that.

if i tell you something, do you promise not to freak out?

depends. are you about to tell me you’re a serial killer?

no!

you giggled to yourself at your humor.

i wanna meet you.

you promised not to freak out, but you were freaking out. it was just now setting in that you didn’t know this man at all. where he lived, how old he was, even what he looked like. you took a few deep breaths and asked a question.

where do you live?

quantico virginia.

no hesitation on that one. he lived in the same town as you? you didn’t know how you’d be able to turn this down...

shit, me too. let’s meet up then.

i’ll send you a good place to get drinks.

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“every time you walk in here, you’re blushing. now so are your ears.” you beamed at derek, sitting at your desk before spilling. “i’m gonna meet him.” “wait what? are you sure that’s safe?” you rolled your eyes. “i’m an fbi agent. i’m not scared of a little danger.” you playfully winked and derek blew out a huff of air. “if anything happens, you know you can call me.” you pouted at your friend and nodded, appreciating his concern. spencer was spinning in his seat. “you happy too?” you asked. he only nodded and didn’t elaborate. you we’re going to press on, but hotch called you all in and you lost your chance.

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on rare occasions, the bau got tough cases with very happy endings. this was one of those cases. the plane ride home was extremely joyous and derek offered to get drinks again. this time, everyone accepted (all except hotch). you texted morgan telling him you were going out tonight and you wouldn’t be back till late. you laughed to yourself. it was like he was your boyfriend.

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the night was young and you were fairly tipsy. ok that’s generous, you were drunk. you were spending most of your time with penelope and it took you a minute to remember spencer. “ohmygosh! spence!” he was startled at your presence but he gave you that flat mouthed smile of his. “how are you! you’re my favorite scorpio.” you nodded as you said it, as if trying to convince him it was true. “thanks? i’m good. you’re drunk.” he pointed out. “no shit. hey!!! you never showed me your tumblr user! you gotta show me that girl you like, bet you she’s really sexy.” you didn’t even know what you were saying at this point, whipping out your phone and snapping a picture with spencer. “what are you doing?” he asked, watching you type. “posting this on tumblr! i want everyone to know you’re my favorite in the world.” he wanted to ask favorite what, but a ping on his phone distracted him. lila posted. he smiled and checked her page.

holy fuck.

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“(y/n)?” he asked, not looking away from his phone. “yess?” you responded. “what’s your tumblr?” what is your tumblr? “uhhh..i don’t know, check.” you tossed him your open phone, and his eyes only grew wider. “you’re lila?” the words rang through your ears like a siren. “what?” the word was breathy, you couldn’t add stability to what you said. spencer showed you his phone, ‘prettyboy187’ on the screen. “you’re morgan?” still no confidence in your voice whatsoever. your feelings were supposed to change, you weren’t supposed to like that morgan was spencer. but they didn’t. you didn’t even think about the fact he saw your swimsuit photos. you loved that morgan was spencer, and you still wanted to see him on the weekend. “are you mad?” you asked, not being able to stop yourself from sipping from your glass. “no. should i be?” you smiled. “no. do you still wanna meet up this weekend?” “yes. but i don’t wanna get drinks.” he wasn’t even drinking, why is he complaining. “where should we go then?” “my house.”

[oveliagirlhaditright]

The Mom Friend

Yeah… though Neku had certainly never signed up to be these four’s mom—and he still had no idea how that had happened—he now knew he wouldn’t change it for the world. Oneshot. Canon compliant. Mom friend Neku. Neo spoilers.

https://archiveofourown.org/works/33385999

At first, if you had asked Neku if he had become the mom friend of the Wicked Twisters, he would have laughed in your face.

Because while he would admit he loved the youngins’—and was very protective of them—some old habits of wanting to be cool, and being somewhat rough around the edges, died hard.

But it was with Nagi that Neku finally realized that this was the case.

The girl had decided to go vegetarian, but her body was rejecting not having a lot of protein and thus needed something like nuts this very instance? Who was it but Neku, who went out to buy her some, at near three o’clock in the morning (because he was a good friend and had expanded his horizons that much), since her parents had recently died in a car crash and they could no longer do it for her, the poor girl.

So, Neku crept into Nagi’s dorm window around one-forty-five-ish—which, looking back on it, probably hadn’t been a good idea and could have scared his friend. But, hey: Neku had gotten used to being in the Game. And the week that Coco brought him back before he ran into Beat, he’d been in hiding, and had maybe gotten used to the idea some; and Nagi didn’t seem spooked, so maybe her mind was still stuck on sneaking around in the Reapers’ Game, too—and Nagi took the food out of Neku’s hands like it was the easiest thing in the world before ruffling his hair.

“Much obliged, Lord Neku,” she said as she fixed her glasses in this dim lighting, so she could see him better. Or so Neku guessed. “Now, hopefully, I can feel better enough, that I can work on my essay about the Canterbury Tales. …No one knows such suffering as me,” Nagi moaned, before going back to her bed and starting on the cashews.

“No, problem,” Neku said then—feeling sort of awkward, as he went to mess with a pair of headphones that were no longer on his person anymore—“if you need help with it… I, uhh, guess I could try and lend a hand. I have university coming up soon, too. And I know they’ll have me doing some English stuff, so…”

“Unless you want to be bored to tears, I suggest that you not make such a promise, unless your heart knows little joy,” Nagi warned him.

And Neku didn’t have to be told twice. So, he did backout of helping her with that paper.

But he knew when he visited Shiki soon—and she asked him what he’d been up to—she would still tease him about being the mom friend, for going out and buying protein for Nagi in the wee hours of the morning.

…

And it continued on like that… and Neku was somewhat loath to admit it, because hey: he had an image to uphold here.

But then again… maybe not, because if this was him pushing out his borders as far as they would go—as Mr. H had instructed him to do three years ago—Neku knew he would gladly do so… even at the risk was being called a “mom”, and even an “old maid”, or something.

Right now, Rindo had severely hurt his ankle… and who was he holding onto as they hobbled away, with designs to get him to a hospital? Neku.

“This is the last time I ever try something from the 90’s again!” Rindo complained, as Neku was half-carrying him to his car now (and how nice it was, that Neku could drive now—from memories of another him that hadn’t lost such formative years—that Joshua had implanted into his head).

“Yeah, Rindo… scooters were cool and everything—yours truly had one—but even I don’t know why you decided to try and bring them back now of all times… Especially since they had a bad habit of spinning right back around and nailing you in the ankle… which you know all too well now,”

And godamnit. Neku really had become the mom friend, huh, if he was now telling his younger friend this venture had been dangerous from the get-go, and how he could have easily seen that if he’d tried to?

Neku pulled on one of his spikes, irritated with himself here, but tried not to show Rindo, lest he think he was mad at him.

“Well, I’d thought about getting a motor scooter,” Rindo explained, Neku loading his pal into his backseat now. “So, I think that’s what got scooters on my brain… But I was trying to be green, and still think of a faster way to catch things in FanGo than walking! And now look where it got me. Oy! …But I guess I shouldn’t be complaining. This should be the least of my problems, when just a few weeks ago I was fighting for you guys’ survival, huh?”

And Rindo paused in where he’d been about to put a hand over his eyes, to peek at Neku now who was currently getting into the driver’s seat—as if he was asking for the past Living Legend to remind the new one to have his priorities straight.

“For real,” Neku told Rindo, whilst he started to pull away now. “When I got out, I was mostly thinking about the Game… about what Joshua did, and how even then, I still trusted him but couldn’t forgive him. And I was so excited to finally meet up with my friends—to finally have some and care about that—be glad, Rindo, that you got out with your friends, and there’s so much trust between you. Like there is between Josh and I now.”

And Rindo set down his phone then—apparently like he had when he first met Shoka in the RG—like he was really listening to what Neku had to say, and he had to appreciate that.

And it might have been his imagination… but Neku could have sworn he saw a flash of blue nodding his head at Neku’s words, as it sat back there with the injured Rindo.

…

The next time Neku ended up being the “mom” for someone in the Wicked Twisters, after the Game, it was with Fret.

It was towards the end of his and Rindo’s sophomore year of high school…

Fret had been ecstatic to come back to life, Neku had known, and wasn’t wasting his second chance. He had really thrown himself into his studies, Rindo had told Neku in private (quite proudly, Neku might add).

If he could keep it up, he would probably even be able to graduate early. And talent scouts were looking at him, Neku had been told: towards a kid who hadn’t strived that hard in school, but now was and excelling because of it.

Naturally, Fret had decided that his calling was fashion—everyone who had been playing the Reapers’ Game with him would have gathered just how much he loved clothes—and apparently he had really thrown himself into designing towards the end of the year, and was trying to put a portfolio together for Jupiter of the Monkey to look at: who the school was suggesting he try and intern with, as they had some connections with (and damn, if Neku didn’t wish he’d gone to Fret and Rindo’s school now, being a huge J of the M fan himself).

Part of Neku wondered why Fret just didn’t try to intern with Shiki during his senior year, but perhaps it was because he was afraid Shiki would just give him the position because they were friends and not because she really thought he was talented.

Anyway… Fret hadn’t gotten the internship. J of the M had said the Fret should try to use less color (you know what? Maybe Neku didn’t like them very much anymore…).

And since then… Fret had seemed to give up on his dream of being a fashion designer, and was trying to be an actor.

And, look: Neku had no problem if him wanting to do both, if he thought he could do it and this was really what Fret wanted… though call him crazy, but he felt like something else was at work here: something that Neku and Shiki had both experienced before.

So, Neku had sat Fret down to talk about it at Ken Doi’s—away from the filmmakers who were currently trying to film in Dogenzaka, that Fret had just been a part of—and laid it all out on the table, “It’s okay… to get Imposter Syndrome. I’ve had it before with my art. Even Shiki has before. But if you want to be an artist, you’re going to fall down a few times… Fret, I feel like you don’t want to be an actor, so much as you don’t mind people dinging your acting, because that isn’t something you care about as much as your designing.”

And after Neku had spoken, Fret somehow looked both like Neku had made him had an epiphany he hadn’t quite realized, and like Neku had stumbled upon the horrible truth he hadn’t wanted anyone to figure out.

Neku took a bite of the yummy curry that Ken Doi had been kind enough to make just for him, after he’d brought Joshua around recently (he’d said he’d missed the two of them. Go figure), and let Fret get his bearings.

And now he was sighing, and running a hand through his hair, much like Neku often did. Neku smiled, finding it hard not to sympathize.

“Oh, man. I really do have to get back into fashion, huh?”

“You do,” Neku agreed, wondering what wonderful articles of clothing Fret might come up with for him to wear in the future. Shoka, too. Really, with those two and Shiki and Eri, Neku had it made in the clothes department, and he was not complaining. “And it’ll be hard sometimes. But most things in life worth gaining are.”

And when Fret smiled back at him, Neku knew he’d made some progress here—which was good—and then he did one thing that was decidedly not mom-like, and let Fret get the bill. Why? Because Neku was a starving college student at this point, and Fret still had parents who paid for stuff for him.

…

And then the last person who needed Neku’s help (…for now, he guessed. Because apparently this was a full-time gig. And at this point, Neku wasn’t complaining because he happily would have taken custody of all the Wicked Twisters long ago if he could’ve), was Shoka.

…Who was freaking out after Rindo having tried to give her a promise ring and wasn’t at all being her usual FanGo loving self, where Rindo was concerned.

And, yeah… Shoka could be a bit of a tsundere sometimes, but Neku felt like the issue ran much deeper.

Neku also happened to see Shoka looking into the mirror a lot lately… And at first, he wondered if she’d become self-conscious like Shiki had been.

But upon hearing the arrogant comments that Shoka still said about herself—that Neku’s surrogate little sister so deserved to say, he thought—he knew that wasn’t the case.

He tried to use a bit of his soul power on her… because it turned out that Neku was strong enough to use it in the RG some, but all that really told the ginger was that it was a deep-rooted issue with Shoka and not what said issue was.

Finally, Neku knew he had to just talk to her.

“Let me in, Shoka,” he urged her—after he’d caught her looking at wedding dresses in her apartment at a group hang-out (it was just the two of them at said hang-out right now; everyone else had gone to get food for everybody). “Tell me what you’re thinking.”

And it was pretty fitting, Neku would later think, that he used Shiki’s old words to him with Shoka here, since she made him think of Shiki some—what with her favorite Mr. Mew hoodie and all. Especially when they’d been in the Game.

And at his question, Shoka sighed—like opening her thoughts to Neku was the biggest burden in the world—and dropped the magazine like it had burned her.

“What?” she demanded, fiddling with the zipper at her neck. “About Rindo? I feel like him wanting to give me a promise ring is silly—and of a time gone by—so of course I told him ‘no’, and give him a hard time about it. Not all of us can be you and Shiki, you know…”

And with that, Shoka seemed content to ignore Neku, and to go boot up her PS5 so she could play the “Stranger of Paradise” demo.

And, hey: more power to her—Neku thought it looked sick, too—but no way was he letting her get off that easily. “That’s a lie, Shoka, and we both know it. So, what’s really going on here?”

Shoka was sighing once more now—as if the weight of the world was on her shoulders. And it probably was, with this tragic girl—but she shuffled on the couch closer to Neku, which he saw as a good sign. “Fine… I guess I should have known that I couldn’t lie to Mr. Soul-Reader… I just- I feel I look too much like them: Ayano and my little sister. And I know it’s dumb, but I worry about it.

“Will I be like Ayano and settle into one thing? Like, say I get really into being Rindo’s girlfriend here… but I force myself to marry him one day, because he really wants that: what if we end up living a loveless life because of that, I didn’t want to tie the knot but forced myself to just because it was what he desired? And since I look like Little Sis… If Rindo and I do end up together, what if I end up dying young like she did and leaving Rindo alone. It’s too much.”

And here Neku had to pull Shoka into a small hug and kiss the crown of her head, whilst he ran calming hands down her arms. Shoka had been through way too much trauma for someone so young. It wasn’t fair. But even with all of that… Neku had to make sure she was sure of one thing right now.

So, he got off the couch and kneeled in front of Shoka, so she was looking into his eyes, and wouldn’t miss how serious this was. “Shoka… you definitely have a lot of baggage there, that I do think you should talk to Rindo about. And I’m so sorry that you’ve lost so much family for someone so young… but know that your family isn’t you. Their lives aren’t yours, nor are the things that they did. The things you do are going to be totally different from them, and you have to make those decisions for yourself. Got it?”

“Okay, Neku,” Shoka allowed, while she helped to pull Neku back up now. And she seemed to be blushing a little… but that was okay, because so was he. Neku may have been the mom of this little group, but big declarations of the heart like that could still be hard for him.

“Thanks!” Shoka beamed, before throwing herself at Neku to give him a quick hug this time.

And Neku laughed slightly. “No problem. Now, what do you say we get super far in this awesome demo before our friends get back, for being losers in forgetting to take us with them to get the food?”

“I think that sounds like a pretty sweet deal!” Shoka agreed, already pulling away from Neku and going for the controller.

Yeah��� though Neku had certainly never signed up to be these four’s mom—and he still had no idea how that had happened—he now knew he wouldn’t change it for the world.

Especially when the rest of his children came back happy—which was always a perfect sight to see—and Shoka did end up working things out with Rindo.

It was a wonderful world, indeed.

Author’s Note: Yeah, I’m headcanoning here that the last Dive that you do (not counting Rhyme) for the little ghost from Shinjuku was Shoka’s sister.

Hope you all enjoyed!

[edenfalling]

the failure mode of performative outrage is hilarity

This morning, I woke up to a series of anonymous ff.net comments on Tides (a Naruto canon-divergence AU fic I wrote back in 2005), which I cannot read as anything other than performance art.

I suspect this is even how the commenter intended them, although what they thought they were performing was threatening and dismissive anger with the aim of producing hurt, fear, and a sense of inferiority, rather than the utter hilarity I actually experienced, because baby's first flame attempts are impossible to take seriously. *wry*

Content warning for misogyny, ableism, homophobia, and death threats/suicide baiting, I guess.

---------------

Chapter 1: What a load of shit. He'd better die! Oh, and suckura's not strong. Her healing, fine, that's ok, though quite honestly, anyone can do that. Hinata, Ino, hell even Naruto heals Guy's eyes or something like that, so she's just a stepping stone there. She's not special and she's not strong. She's still useless, weak and totally ugly!

Chapter 2: Wtf you damn retarded sakutard. Suckura the desperate slut might want to turn traitor for her precious delusional fantasy of being with sasgay but Naruto would NEVER turn his back on the village! he stay true to his ninja way you fucked up delusional creep! This story is a pile of shit! Watch the damn anime before making your own pathetic shit up!

Chapter 3: Boring shit! Write better. Naruto would never leave konoha for the avenging traitor!

Chapter 4: No. Suckura IS still behind. She will never be near Naruto's level! Fuck you and your made up shit!

Chapter 5: Wtf again? You really are pathetic. Naruto was the one to learn the water walking and walked on the ocean when he saved that worthless slut suckura on that mission with that Idate kid! Stop fucking changing things to make sasgay the traitor and that desperate weak slut suckura look good. Naruto is the genius. Even Tsunade and Jiraiya said so, since he learned the Rasengan in 3 days, so stop funking up a good anime cunt!

Chapter 6: Sakutard! She has NO curves. Zero. Zilch. Nada. Get it?! Suckura does not change. she's STILL a ramrod straight billboard brow with a huge forehead that's ugly and doesn't give her character, and a huge ass! She has never been a looker. that's Ino, Temari and Hinata's job. And even Tenten has more to her than suckura the billboard brow and body!

Chapter 7: Oh god this is sickening. Sakutards are disgusting. YOU'RE disgusting! Suckura is not the stronger one. She's NOT. FUCKING. STRONG! Get it through your thick, delusional head! She is shit!

Chapter 8: You are a sicko! It was Kakashi that the older Naruto and Suckura fought, not sasgay. Sasgay s not stronger than Naruto. Naruto would thrash him easily. Suckura is NOT strong! godamnit you're completely delusional. You're a typical sakutard who makes up shit to make that shit look good. She is total trash! So funk you! Go and die you worthless piece of trash!

[Chapter 9 was apparently too awful to merit its own comment.]

Chapter 10: Thank fuck for the end! What a load of shit. Sasgay is an avenger. End of. He's NOT special! He's a demon by choice! ITachi is the one that getsrid of the curse mark, not suckrua, who would never manage that kind of thing! Itachi had reasons to kill his crappy clan off and that was cause they were trying to stage a coup d'etat, so fuck you! They deserved to die! And so do you sakutards! You're all pathetic and delusional!

---------------

...

I find these hilarious both for their general misreading of the manga (apparently the intended message is that Naruto is god and can do no wrong, while both Sakura and Sasuke -- you know, the people Naruto loves and would die to save -- are horrible and need to die in agony (thus making Naruto's choice of friends... wrong? impossible! pay no attention to the contradiction behind the curtain!)), and for the amount of effort expended in performative outrage when every browser comes equipped with a perfectly functional back-button. The attitudes embodied in the commenter's choice of insults are more sad than anything else, but also contribute to my inability to take anything this person says seriously.

This gift of hilarity has also reminded me that I should probably go stick a note in front of all my Naruto fics saying that they're based on manga canon only (for the very simple reason that I have never watched the anime). I mean, people like today's commenter never read author's notes anyway -- they are looking for things at which they can perform frothing outrage, not nuance -- but it would give me an additional thing to laugh about later on when they act like anime-only events should be a trump card when discussing a manga-based story. *wry* And for people who aren't performative outrage artists, such a note would be a quick and easy way to set proper expectations going in.

...I'll get to that some other day, when I am feeling up to a couple hours of internet housekeeping.

[karij]

I just finished Deponia: The Complete Journey. 

I bought it on sale for something like 10 dollars for the bundle trilogy. I want my 10 dollars and 20 hours back. Spoilers below the cut. Not that you should play this game, so... read away and be warned.

It’s so damn frustrating because it was so close to being good, it had an interesting world and some fun characters, fantastic art, and a mostly-good sense of humor. But mostly-good wasn’t good enough, because the jokes made in poor taste... god I hoped there was going to be some sort of punch-in-the-gut moment of realization for Rufus (the main character), but in the end he’s portrayed as a true hero because dying for his girlfriend absolved all of his wrong doings. It certainly did not, not by a long shot.

During my quest to save Deponia, I was not only given the opportunity but FORCED to partake in lovely scenarios such as:

- Exposing my ‘girlfriend’ Goal (subtle name, I know) in her underwear and watching her be physically harmed by dangerous machinery while talking to a ‘fan’, then being patted on the back and having Goal tell me I was ‘cool’

- Leaving small children with an obvious pedophile to get them out of my hair, then trying to unknowingly convince the children to go in and check out his ‘petting zoo’ in his trailer before leaving the children to die in the sewers.

- Stealing hormones from a transphobically depicted transgender woman and using them to unknowingly perform a sex change on an unknowing/unwilling bar patron.

- Driving my ex-girlfriend to a mental breakdown, driving her to near-suicide, and then convincing her psychiatrist to tell her to kill herself to take away her last safe place. This is presented as reasonable on the psychiatrists part because Toni talked about her issues too much. To her psychiatrist.

- Finally, the most disturbing action I’ve ever had to take in any game, ever, which almost made me put the game down and never pick it back up again. Separating a bi-racial couple, sending the white husband to be robbed of free will by a vampiress and turned into a living drive-thru speaker, and then proceeding to convince his mourning black (I say that to emphasize how horrifically racist this bit is) wife into being SOLD to a MONKEY GRINDER to DANCE AS HIS MONKEY wearing nothing but a RED MONKEY VEST that doesn’t even REMOTELY cover her chest! A game literally made me engage in SEX TRAFFICKING OF AN AFRICAN AMERICAN WOMAN, and told me to make her live the rest of her live as a NAKED DANCING MONKEY. AS A PUZZLE IN A MEDIOCRE ADVENTURE GAME. WHAT THE FUCK.

Oh, here’s the kicker. That was JUST THE LAST GAME IN THE TRILOGY. Yes, it is by far the WORST but the others game aren’t GOOD either. The first game involved you being responsible for causing long-lasting brain damage to Goal, then calling her your girlfriend the whole game as she lies comatose! In the second game you split Goal’s personality into 3 separate sections: Lady Goal, Spunky Goal, and BABY GOAL. Yeah guys, we all know the 3 parts of the female psyche right? Too-Good-For-Men, Fiesty-And-Hot-For-Men, and More-Childish-Than-Men. Basic fucking psychology really. 

 You then, for the remainder of the game, whenever she won’t consent to an activity she views as too dangerous and too humiliating or anything, for any reason, you take out a remote and changer her to a different personality which WILL consent to your demands, or in the case of Baby Goal, isn’t smart enough to know better! Like... I just.... I REALLY WANTED THIS GAME TO BE OKAY. I KEPT HOPING THAT RUFUS WOULD GROW UP AND CHANGE HIS WAYS AND REALIZE WHAT HE’D DONE AND MAKE THINGS RIGHT. 

BUT NO. IT’S OKAY GUYS, RUFUS CAN’T CHANGE AND IT’S NOT HIS FAULT. BECAUSE HE’s A CLONE, A CLONE DESIGNED TO HAVE NO REGARD FOR HUMAN LIFE. SO IT’S OKAY. YOU HUMILIATED AND INJURED YOUR GIRLFRIEND? ITS OKAY, I’M A CLONE. YOU NEARLY MADE YOU EX KILL HERSELF? DUDE, I’M A CLONE. YOU LITERALLY SOLD A BLACK WOMAN INTO SEXUAL SLAVERY FOR PERSONAL BENEFIT? IT’S OKAY GUYS, I DON’T HAVE TO TAKE RESPONSIBILITY FOR MY ACTIONS, I DON’T HAVE TO CHANGE THINGS, I DON’T HAVE TO CHANGE AT ALL. BECAUSE I’M A CLONE AND I DON’T KNOW BETTER. AND I PROBABLY BREATH TO MY SKIN BECAUSE HOLY SHIT WHY NOT THROW THAT IN.

This game took me 18 hours with a walkthrough because of the confusing as hell, antiquated adventure pull design and GOD I want that time back. I really do. I regret having played this game because it gave me so much hope, it tricked me with its colorful designs and fun visuals and pretty soundtrack and cool character designs into thinking it was a good game when this piece of shit is GAMING’S EQUIVALENT OF FAMILY GUY. Good GOD this game crossed so many lines that it did NOT earn the right to cross, that it did NOT cross in good faith, that it did NOT even REMOTELY cross with any sort of respect or self-awareness. I wanted to like this game, and deep down it hurts me that this team was wasted on a project that was so deeply entrenched in racism, misogyny, homophobia, and transphobia that every time it pulled me in it threw me right back out. 

This is such a waste of talent, and it really pains me to say that I don’t think I can play one of Daedelic Entertainment’s games ever again unless they impress the FUCK out of me and cut this bigoted bullshit out of their games forever. Godamnit it Deponia, I had so much hope for you. I invested myself in your world, I fell in love with your characters, I had so much faith in you that you would move past your rough spots and bring about something special. But you didn’t. And you never will. Because for all your charm and all of your beauty there’s an ugly reality right underneath. Rufus considers himself a hero, somebody who makes a difference. But Deponia, just like Rufus, your actions show that in reality, you really are nothing but a trash baby.   

Don’t play this game. You’ll put too much of yourself into it and get nothing back. Just trust me.