#And Aaron and Conner would be friends | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

thegallows-world · 3 years ago

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Opportunity presented itself

Less than a week as roommates Conner and I would wrestle until we were sweaty. He was on the college gymnastics team and had an awesome body. I was in good shape and a bit bigger so I had an advantage. I would often pin him down and choke him. I loved the gurgling sounds and how he kicked and struggled.

Most of his friends were from the team and were all very fit. His friend Aaron was like the leader of their group and jealous of those outside since most gymnast are not very tall like my buddies on the water polo team.

One evening after a few beers at his friends we came home and he tackled me and pinned me to the floor. He always seemed to have the advantage when we drank. He choked me over and over by squeezing and letting go. He giggled each time. We were both soaked with sweat when he let me up. The next day as he was reading I snuck up from behind and garrotted him with a jump rope I had. I made it tight but not so that it left a bruise. His friend Aaron came over to give back a book he borrowed and saw Connors neck red from the rope. He asked Connor "did he try to hang you?" Connor laugh and said we were just fooling around. I'm certain that Aaron went and told the others that I tried to strangle Connor.

Weeks later after a few beers we were wrestling and I got his hands tied behind his back. I got him to kneel in front of a mirror. I got my video camera going and said "You get to watch yourself strangle."

I had a black cord I was saving for this occasion. His abs tighten when I put the cord around his neck and the vein on the side of his neck bulged as I rubbed his shoulders to get him relaxed. I moved the cord above his cute adamsapple and made it snug. He was as curious as I was to watch him strangle. He swallowed a couple of times and after the third time I pulled on the ends of the cord squeezing his neck. Just a little gasp as the cord halted his breath. He didn't struggle much but his abs worked hard to get him a breath. Then his eyes rolled back and head fell forward as he passed out. He came to right away after I laid him down on the floor. He said "Damn, that has to be what it is like to be strangled to death " I un-tied his hands and we both took a nice shower together. After we had some wine and watch him strangle again. I would often find the video out of its case and often watched it myself while I was home alone.

On one occasion I was stepping in a hot tub at our apartment complex, Connor and his friends were already in it. As I stepped in I felt someone's leg stick out to trip me. Aaron was looking up at me and I thought it was him. I flicked his adamsapple with my finger. His eyes open wide and asked why I did that. I said "You tried to trip me!" Connor then admitted that it was he that did that. I apologized to Aaron but he didn't respond. His friend Ian asked him "did he just flick your adamsapple?"

I heard Aaron say "yup, now I know who we are going to hang."

Over the next couple of months Connor and I would continue to wrestle and occasionally I would garrot him with the rope. He also used it on me as well but he often preferred to get my neck between his strong legs and scissor choke me. It was like being strangled by a python. Aaron came over twice after Connor was garrotted and saw the red line across his throat and would say to Connor "when are we going to hang him?" Arron would look at me when he said it as if he was asking Connor for permission. Connor never responded. One day I went to pick up Connor after practice and he was among his friends on the team. As I came close I heard Aaron say "here he comes get a rope?" His friend Ian said "Let's hang him." It was an awkward moment as the others seemed to agree.

Connor and I left and as we drove I asked Connor if Aaron says that to all of his friends. Connor says "No, just you."

I said "he has them all saying that I should hang?"

Connor : "Actually, he really wants to hang you."

I said "All this time he has been saying 'when are we going to hang him ' he really wanted to hang me? Does the whole team want to hang me?"

Connor :"Ian wants to hang you too."

I said "and that's OK with you!"

Connor "he doesn't want to kill you just hang you like he saw in a video one time."

I said "and you are ok with that!"

He said "it's not like he can just come over and hang you. But everyone has seen the video and he says that you have thee perfect neck to hanged like that."

Again I said " AND YOU WOULD BE OK WITH THAT !"

He just shook his head as if I didn't understand. I asked him if he had seen this video. He said he had and that if I wanted to see it he would get it from Aaron. Weeks later my curiosity got to me and I asked Connor to get the video. He popped it in watched it with me. The video started with a group of shirtless guys under a patio with a strong beam in the middle. Two eye-bolts secured in the beam and a rope threaded through. On one side was a noose and on the other was a weight on a chair. One of the guys has his hands tied behind his back and they brought him over near the noose. One of them un-tied the noose, it was just for affect. He wrapped the rope around his neck twice and a knot tied above his adamsapple. The cameraman gave a close-up of his neck, veins on the side plump and adamsapple struggles to get under the rope to swallow. Another guy tied the other end to the weight. The hot, shirtless guy was compliant but his abs tighten with anticipation. There was no sound but they seemed to use the clock as the signal to slowly lower the weight pulling his head back and lifting to his toes. Most of the weight was on the back of his neck which put less pressure on his throat as a noose would. My heart raced as I watched this lean, muscled guy strangle. They allowed him to struggle until his body went limp-about 45 seconds. They quickly un-tied the rope around his neck and laid him down. Sweat made his body shine and left two red lines around his neck. He was not out long and his abs labored to get him a breath in between coughs. It was very exciting to know that someone wanted to hang me like that.

Connor said "Its not much different than the last time you garrotted me in front of the mirror and I passed out."

I said "I never strangled you in front of your friends."

He said "I think Aaron would enjoy that in front of the guys to get the maximum amount of humiliation"

Connor and I were both obviously excited after watching it I went into my room to enjoy the moment.

Though I wasn't there Aaron asked Connor if I enjoyed watching the video, Connor said that he just smiled and nodded - it was more than enough.

Not long after I saw Aaron at a party near by. Aaron was a very good looking guy with long hair, great smile and cute adamsapple - I loved to recall when I flicked it. I got a drink then walked over to him. "Connor says that you really would like to hang me as they did in that video."

He said "if the opportunity presented itself." Then took a long drink.

I said "is it because I flicked your adamsapple that one time?"

He said "that's not why but it was when I knew it should be you"

Then he said " given the opportunity you wouldn't want to garrot me like you have done to Connor?"

I looked at his strong and handsome neck and said "given the opportunity I guess I would enjo that"

We toasted each other, I enjoyed watching him swallow his drink.

Then Connor and Ian came over. Ian said "should I get the rope?"

I said "You can't just hang someone, you have to have an indictment then a trial and a verdict and then sentence. Before you get the rope out." Arron and Ian looked at each other as if I gave them an idea.

Just over a month later I came home after my last final exam ready to enjoy the evening with some friends and beer. It was a hot day so I changed into shorts, tank top and flip flops. As I came out of my room two of Connors friends met me with a piece of paper and said "You have been served" It was a grand jury indictment that one of them got from their dad's work in the court house.

I was being accused of Gross Inhumane Behavior and ordered to stand trial. There was lots of details and the Prosecutor's recommded sentence was :

"Hang by the neck"

A friend of mine was told earlier what they had planned and told him he should be my lawyer. Eric was happy to play along. I showed him the indictment and told him "They really want to hang me." He said "They showed me the video and said they would do it with or without me ". Also, Eric was no match against any of Connors friends and his dad was a lawyer so if anything he could help. More and more guys started to come over knowing what was planned. Connor came to me and said "I didn't know about any of this until I was got here. " I said "it's ok, I was the one that gave them the idea "

Aaron came in after knowing that I got the indictment and said "the trial starts at 6:00 pm." They used a pull up bar that went in between the door jams to the hallway and had a noose dangling from it. Aaron introduced Eric to Patrick who would be the judge. I had not met Patrick before, but I thought to myself that I wouldn't mind being sentenced by him. Blue eyes and light blond hair with a great jaw line. His glasses made him look very official.

My old roommate came in and talked to Aaron and Connor, I had forgotten that Aaron knew him. Then came over to me and said "They want me to testify." I asked "are you going to? He said "sure, why not."

I said "They want to hang me."

He said "after all those times you garrotted me you deserve it. Besides I'm sure they wouldn't really hurt you." He then went and grabbed a beer. It was starting to look enviable and everyone was ok with it. Connor brought me a beer as more guys came and were assigned positions : procecutor, juror, witness, guard, executioner.

Two young neighbors from high school were also asked to be witnesses Eric came over with them and with some concern worried about testifying. They were told that the noose could be used on them if they didn't. I told them to go ahead but don't lie. After a couple of beers they were eager to testify..

At 6:00 pm everyone was taking their positions and judge Patrick open the court. Ian was the procecutor and in his opening said how the state would prove that I accumulated so many instances of Inhumane Behavior that I should be found guilty and that the sentence be that I should be hanged.

Eric opened like a true defense attorney that I only played as hard as those that played with me and that no one was ever injured by it.

They had my old roommate Chris on the stand first. Asked if I ever used a rope to strangle him with it and if it ever left a mark on his neck. Chris agreed that I had many times strangled him with a rope but only a couple of times did it leave a mark.

Eric crossed by asking if Chris ever responded in kind. Chris agreed that he did. Ian countered if it was even between us or one more than the other. Chris implyed that I had many more times used the rope against him.

Aaron took the stand to say that he saw Connor with red lines on his neck caused by me using a rope to garrot Connor though he never actually saw me do it. He also testified that I said, given the opportunity that I would like to garrot him as well. He told them how I flicked his adamsapple for no reason.

Connor reluctantly testified that I had choked and garrotted him many times. Ian showed the jury the video of Connor be garrotted in front of the mirror and passing ou. Eric held his own as if he was a true defense attorney but the testamony was overwhelming. By the end of the trial I would have voted guilty.

Jason, the high school neighbor was the last to testify. He told how he saw me choke Connor and that I once squeezed his neck with my hands playfully. You could tell that he was worried a bit for me.

Ian summed up his case. Then Eric made a great speech on my behalf. Judge Patrick gave the jurors their orders and sent them to the room. The six jurors took two six packs with them as they passed the noose to the room. The judge, Ian and Eric walked outside for a cigarette and talked. Aaron came and sat next to me. He said "well, it looks like the opportunity has presented itself."

I said "I presume that you will be the hangman?" With a big smile he said " Oh yeah"

I said "You must have planned this for a while."

Aaron "ever since I came up with the idea of a trial." He laughed

I said " Did you practice? Do you know what you are doing?"

Aaron"Just this week we couldn't during competition but I got to do it with Ian and Connor."

I said "CONNOR! he helped you with this?"

Aaron "No, not the planning. But since he was used to being strangled he let me practice on him. I used Ian too because he knew of my plan but his neck is thin and long and I was afraid it would hurt him. Connor was actually my first choice after he lost in competition two months ago. But the guys on the team didn't like that idea."I said "then I came along"

Aaron "yup, were born to hang as they say " he played with the chain around my neck.

A juror came out to get more beer and said that they needed 10 more minutes.

They came back in then judge Patrick came in. They stood and treated him like a judge when he entered.

"Do you have a unanimous verdict?

"We do your honor"

They passed the form to the judge.

He unfolded it and passed it back and asked the Forman. "How do you find the defendant?

He responded " We find the defendant Guilty"

The rest of the guys cheered.

Judge Patrick thanked the jury.

Then says "would you please rise" Eric and I stood up..

Judge : This court has found you guilty of Gross Inhuman Behavior,

Is there anything you want to say before I pronounce the sentence of this court?"

Worried that I would sound awkward I shook my head No.

Judge Patrick took off his glasses and looked directly at me with his intense blue eyes and said "Having heard testimony of your behavior it is this courts opinion that you have accumulated the annimus of the state that I have no choice but to sentence you to hang by your neck. It is to commence at exactly 9:00 pm with no appeal."He trapped his make shift gavel and dismissed the court.

I thanked Eric for trying and told him how impressed I was. Connor came over and asked if I was mad at him. I told him no, I brought this on myself.

Just before 7:00 they ordered pizza and some went out for more beer.

Ian and two others came over with a dog chain and rope. One of them put the chain over my head and left it loose around my neck. The rope was attached to this chain and then tied to the leg of the heavy table. It was that or put in the closet until it was time.

One of the jurors was a buddy of mine from the water polo team. He said that he was sorry that he voted guilty but "I have never seen anyone hang before, besides everything they said was true. Just the video of you garroting him in front of the mirror until he past out was enough."

I said "They would probably have hanged you if you didn't go along "

By 7:30 the pizza came and the young, cute pizza guy saw them practicing with Eric what they were going to do. He asked Connor "are they going to hang that guy?"

Connor "No, not him. They are just practicing. He's going to be hanged later." - Pointing at me.

Aaron said "he's going to hang at 9:00, what time do you get off work?”

he said "8:00 can I come and watch?"

Aaron said "sure, bring another pizza"

Pizza guy "can I bring a friend ?"

Connor "sure"

I ate pizza and drank beer as guys came over and played with the chain around my neck. They had the video of the guy that was hanged playing each time someone new came in.

Aaron had a guys practice tying Eric's hands behind his back and had a suitcase ready to be filled with books for weight on the other end of the rope. Aaron used a few of the guys to practice tying the rope around their neck.

Patrick came over to see how I was doing. He rubbed my shoulder and said " that was about the most errotic thing I have ever done. I had to go to my place and jerk off "

That made me so hard.

About 8:30 the pizza guy and his cute friend came in with more pizza.

Ian turned on the video for them to see. Then they came over to me.

" Wow, that has to be crazy knowing that you are going to hang "

I said "it's pretty wild"

Aaron told them " let me show you the noose "

Connor brought me a beer. I said "I can't believe you invited the pizza guy and his friend to watch me hang," Connor said "ah, how else will they learn. "

The two neighbor guys got with them as Aaron was showing the two how the two pull up bars allows the suitcase full of books will pull anyone in the noose up. He showed them how to properly put on a noose and how much more effective it was than the way I was going to hang. He told the four of them that they had to play rock - paper - scissors and that one of them will try it with half empty suitcase for 15 seconds. They turned to each other with the pizza guys friend being the loser. His name was Donny and he looked like a very young and smaller version of Tom Cruise. Ian helped him take his shirt off and tied his hands behind his back. He looked at the pizza guy and said "You brought me here to see me hang didn't you?"

Pizza guy " wait, no. Let me hang instead, he going to think I set this whole thing up."

Aaron " Sorry, rule is that once your hands are tied behind your back then there's no going back "

They had a video camera on as well

They made him stand near noose and Aaron let the pizza guy put it around his neck. Aaron adjusted the noose above his adamsapple as he nervously stood there. Then Ian slowly lowered suitcase. He gagged as the weight pulled him up on his toes, squeezing his neck, tilting his head and making his face red. Just 15 seconds and they let him down. They let the pizza guy take the noose off his friends neck. It was even fun for me to watch.

Now 8:45 they took me to the bathroom 'Just in case', It was about time anyways.

Then back in the room with the recorder going they took off the chain and took off my tank top and tied my hands behind my back. Then a strap across my chest and arms. Aaron came into the room shirtless and with a hood, he came ready for his part. The suitcase was filled with books and on a chair in the hall. The rope over the bar in the closet and over the bar in the hall.

Aaron : "The state has ordered that you be hanged by your neck, is there anything you want to say?"

Sweat rolling down my body I shake my head No.

8:58 they position me next to the noose. Aaron un-ties the noose and puts the rope around my neck twice With one minute to go he adjust the rope above my adamsapple and makes it snug and tied a knot above my adamsapple. The other end of the rope attached to the weight.

With 10 seconds Aaron suggest that I swallow one last time. The rope was so tight that when I swallowed my adamsapple could not get back under the rope. Aaron help get the rope back up just in time. Ian slowly lowered the suitcase at exactly at 9:00.

My head was pulled back the weight pulled me to my toes. I could hear myself gasp and wheeze as the guys laughed and cheered.

The weight was more than I thought it would be. For about 15 seconds I was able to gasp enough air but then found myself gurgling. I couldn't swallow so I choked on my spit. By 30 seconds I was strangling and bouncing on my toes making it tighter with each bounce. I could hear them laugh at my abs and how the spit was rolling down my chin.

At 45 seconds my body went still to conserve energy. The crowd got quiet waiting to see if I would last the one minute required "by law"

The video reviled that my body went limp at 55 seconds and hanged lifeless for 5 seconds.

I woke up a few minutes later lying on top of my bed. Just Connor and old roommate Chris were there when I woke. I was soaked in sweat and my neck sore. After a short while they sat me up and un-tied my hands. In the other room they were already replaying my hanging as well as Donny's hanging and Connor being strangled.

I started to hang at 9:00 and emerged from the room at 9:15.

The noose again dangling from the bar. They cheered when I came out and Aaron came and shook my hand and said that I was a good sport about it. Connor gave me a beer but I wasn't able to swallow for a while. A few guys got there late but were able to watch the video.

Later that evening the pizza guy and his friend were joking about him being hanged. His friend thought that that's why he brought him. He asked Aaron if he knew that they would hang him before he got there. Aaron said :"No. But if you want to make it even we will hang him for you."

He looked at his friend and said "We will never be even if they don't hang you too"

Pizza guy "Donny, I didn't choose you to be hanged, I even offered to take your place!"

Donny :"Ok, then you should be ok if they hang you now, so that we could be even "

Pizza guy " I'm not going to tell them to hang me "

Aaron looks at Donny "last chance"

Donny looks at his friend then says

"Hang him"

Ian was ready with the rope and ties his hands behind his back. Patrick takes half of the weight out of the suitcase and puts it on the chair. The pizza guy is surprised with the speed of which they had him ready to hang.

This time I was able to watch close up. Patrick gave the noose to Donny and said " You have the honors."

Donny put the noose over his friend head and said "This will be over and we will be even "

Patrick adjusted the noose snug above his adamsapple and told him to swallow. The rope bounced up and down then Aaron lowered the weight pulling him up. He seemed surprised as the noose squeezed his neck as tight as it did. Donny watched as his friend strangled in the noose. His cute abs tighten unable to get a breath.

It was awesome to watch Patrick be the hangman.

Just 15 seconds but his body went limp. They made the noose loose and laid him down. Just a few seconds and his body spasim and he was awake. Donny took the noose off his neck and helped him sit up. Aaron un-tied his hands.

Pizza guy. "Wow, that was crazy, did I pass out?."

Donny " Yeah, but just for a second "

Pizza guy. "I gotta watch that"

They went over and watched themselves hang over and over.

I told Patrick "They thought I was going to be the big show "

#choke and strangle #hanging

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word-scribbless · 4 years ago

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Smile Again Part 12

Finalllly here! Little time jump! The end for the time being but probably not forever!

Masterlist ———— series masterlist

—————————————————————

The past year had been a lot of things. Hectic; full of cases, and moving, and adjusting, but also full of; love, and movie nights, and becoming a family.

Y/N had began to move into the Hotchner house hold the very day after Aaron asked. Her, Aaron and Jack had a packing and moving party that day after they had told him. Jack, really all three of them, were too excited to wait. The next day they told JJ and then she was so excited that they had another packing party, this time with wine. The BAU team, and Will and the boys, all helped that next weekend.

At first Jack took a little time to get used to Y/N being there all the time. One day he just got overwhelmed and would only talk to his dad. Y/N expected it, it still hurt like hell but she expected it. She told Aaron she was going to spend the day at JJ’s and that he should have a dad and Jack day.

Aaron felt awful but she calmed him immediately. “Aaron, I know he loves me, but we knew this would happen. No matter what I’m a woman, whose not his mom, moving in and loving him and his father. No matter how much he loves me and wants me here, he’s going to be confused.”

Just hearing that made Aaron fall in love with her even more.

It had turned out that Jack had accidentally called Y/N his mom to his friend at school the day before and was feeling guilty and confused. Aaron talked to him, told him that it was okay to love his mom and Y/No that he himself was confused at first too. He explained that Hailey would always love them and want what’s best for them, and he believed that was Y/N.

Jack looked up at him with big eyes and said “I think so too Daddy! Do you think I could call y/N mommy?” Aaron smiled and nodded, telling him he should talk to Y/N about it.

Later that night When Y/N came home Aaron directed her to his son’s room. She came out about 30 minutes later with a big smile and happy tears.

“You okay?” Aaron asked, leading her to the couch. She nodded and explained to him how Jack had climbed into her lap, said he was sorry for being rude to her and then asked if she could be his other mom and he could call her mommy.

“What’d you say?” Head smiling softly.

“You knew and didn’t warn me?” She said with mock betrayal.

“Maybe, so what’d you say?”

“Like I’d ever say no to that? I love him Aaron! Of course I said yes!”

“We love you Y/N!” Aaron whispered as he pulled her legs into his lap and kissed her softly.

A few months later, Jack had more questions about Y/N. One day after Y/N and Jack had gone to the grocery store Jack yelled “mommy!” Over the radio in the car.

“Yeah bug?” She said.

“When are you and daddy getting married?”

Y/N froze.

“Well, I’m not sure bud! Sometimes grownups do things a little out of order, but I love you and your dad forever with or with out being married okay?”

“Okay! Love you too mommy!” Jack sings from the back seat.

Y/N smiled. She loved that little boy and his dad. She wasn’t gonna lie, being Mrs. Y/N Hotchner sounded pretty great. She wasn’t in a rush though, she was just happy to be theirs.

Little did Y/N know Jack asked his father the same question the very next day on the way to school.

“Hey daddy?”

“Yeah bud?”

“When are you and mommy getting married?”

“Well bud that’s something you and I need to talk about.”

“It is?”

“Mhm” he nodded and pulls the car over into a close by gas station parking lot. He turns around and looks at his son.

“Yeah, I want to ask Y/N to marry me. I wanted to make sure you’d be okay with that! I was gonna talk to you tonight.”

“You’re gonna ask her!?! When!?!” He squealed.

“So I guess you’re okay with it?” Aaron chuckled.

“Yessss!” He squealed again “I asked Y/N when you were getting married yesterday! She said she didn’t know but she loves us no matter what! But she looked all happy when I asked.”

This mad Hotch smile.

“Well I guess that’s a good sign she’ll say yes then huh?”

He nodded happily.

“Wanna come pick out a ring with me after school?”

Jack squealed again and Aaron took that as a yes.

A few months later Aaron and Jack had planned it all out. Jack was at Jessica’s. Aaron and Y/N were on a weekend trip to New York celebrating their year long relationship.

They had just gotten back from dinner and were sitting on the balcony when y/n finally asked what she’d been wondering all night.

“You okay? You seem nervous.” She asked taking his hand.

“Yeah, everything is perfect. I just had something I want to talk to you about.” He said turning to her and taking both of her hands.

“I once told you that I wasn’t asking you to marry me, just to be your friend and that you call the shots” he said reaching to brush some hair behind her ear. “a lot has changed since then. I love you, and I know you and your love for me enough to know that I can be a little less timid with you now. I still always want to be your friend Y/N and so much more than that. You’ll always call the shots. The one thing from that first statement that has changed is that this time I am asking you to marry me.” He said softly as he smiled with teary eyes, getting down on one knee in front of her chair.

Y/N gasped, her eyes filled with tears as he took her hand in his. The other hand flew to her mouth. She couldn’t believe how lucky she was.

“You can always say no, but you can’t say yes unless I ask right?” He laughed, quoting what she once said to him. She nodded with a watery giggle.

“So here I go; Y/N Y/M/N Y/L/N, will you be my wife?“ he asked holding out the ring that had been in his pocket.

“Yes! A million times yes” she answered barely waiting for him to slide the ring on to pull him into her for a kiss.

They both ended up on the floor of the balcony with Y/N in Aaron’s lap, laughing and looking at her ring.

“Did jack know you were doing this?” She asked.

“Yes and he’s probably bugging the crap out of Jess waiting for an answer.” He laughed

“Well let’s call him! “ she said as she got up and pulled Aaron with her.

“Okay it has to be a video call because he wants to see you open this. “ he said pulling an envelope with ‘mommy’ written on it in jacks hand writing out of his pocket.

She gasped and nodded. Moving to sit on the bed as Aaron took out his phone.

Jack and Jess answered the phone and y/n smiled as Jack jumps up and down saying

“Did you ask her!?!”

“I did!” Aaron said with a smile.

“What’d you say mommy?!?

“I could never say no to a Hotchner man”

She smiled holding up her hand.

“Congratulations you two” Jessica said.

“Daddy give her the envelope!!!!” Jack asked, jumping up and down.

“I have it bud, can I open it?” She asked

He nodded And she opened the envelope to see a hand drawn picture of the three of them holding hands, with the words ‘I love you! Will you be my mommy forever?’

She felt tears I her eyes and looked closer to see that Jack had drawn a blonde smiling stick figure angel and one of a man angel that resembled a picture she had on her mantle. She could only guess they were Haley and Conner and the tears came faster.

Behind the picture was a packet of adoption papers and taped to the back of the envelope was an elegant ring that matched her engagement ring with 3 larger stones of her Aaron and Jack’s bithstones and two smaller ones one the out side one connors birthstone and one a ruby.

She gasped.

“Daddy said that you and him think momma and Connor sent us to each other so you can carry all of us with you.” Jack I love this and I would love to be your mommy, I will never ever replace your momma but I will love you for always my sweet boy!”

“She said yes!” He yelled hugging Jess. Y/N turned to Aaron who hugged her with a huge smile.

“Hotchner boys can I have a minute with aunt Jessy?” y/n asked

“Sure I’ll go get ready for bed!” Jack peeped “I love you mommy, love you daddy!”

“We love you too” they said.

“I’ll be on the balcony, bye Jess” Aaron said kissing y/N’s head.

“You look happy” Jess said wiping her own tears

“I am Jess, I just- are you okay with all this?” Y/N asked

“I am beyond happy Y/N, Aaron and Jack are my family, always, and now you are too. I really do think Haley sent you to her boys and I couldn’t be happier.”

“Thank you Jessica!”

“Always! I miss having a sister, and while you’re not a replacement to anyone, you are pretty great as yourself.”

“You’ll be a bridesmaid right?” Y/N said, wiping new tears at Jess’s words.

“I’d love to Y/N. Now get back to your future husband” she smiled.

“Okay, kiss jack for me.”

She walked out on the balcony and wrapped her arms around his middle, causing him to turn and look down at her.

“I love you Aaron, thank you for making me smile again.”

“I love you Y/N.” He said kissing her ring finger, then her forehead and finally her lips.

@thebadassbitchqueen @violetclifford @kyleetheeditor @thelostallycat @mac99martin @stop-drop-and-drumroll @diesinspanishbcimhispanic @averyhotchner

#criminal minds #criminal minds imagine #criminal minds fanfiction #criminal minds x reader #aaron hotchner imagine #aaron hotchner #aaron hotchner x reader #aaron hotchner fanfic #female!reader

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allforhader · 4 years ago

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Your Friends are...Nice

Aaron Conners x (F) Reader

Requested by: @billhxder7

Warnings: Langauge

“I like your friends”

“Aaron, you only met Hana and who doesn’t like her? Come on.” Y/N handed the tablet to the nurse before walking with Aaron to the attending lounge.

“Why can’t we have a game night and I’ll meet them there? You said Hana has a boyfriend”

“I know but it’s best to be out and about. Just in case we gotta sneak out early” Y/N teases stealing a kiss from her boyfriend. “My group of friends may not be athletes but you’ll get a kick out of them.”

“I would totally ask you if I can bring Lebron, but you’d probably want me to meet them without the distraction” Aaron wraps his arms around her waist. “Even though my bomb ass orthopedic surgeon girlfriend would happily distract me”

“I better be the only distraction, and the only thing you have your eyes on” Y/N smiles as he brought her close kissing her once more before parting.

“I have a consult. Then your friends can torcher me with their many questions” Aaron smiles as Y/N hasn’t stopped smiling watching her boyfriend go.

After the consult and a bit of work behind the desk, Y/N happily walks into Aaron’s office wearing one of his sweaters under her trench coat. She likes leaving work in something comfortable like his sweaters. He looks up from his desk smiling as she patiently waited by the door.

“Is it bad that I kinda want to stay here and admire you from a far?”

“No, but you better finish up so we can go. Then maybe later tonight...you’ll get something” Y/N smirks biting her lip as Aaron finished up his work before quickly getting up and taking his jacket on the way out with her.

“Hana!”

“Y/N!”

The two instantly hug one another once they met up in the bar by their apartment complex.

“Collins, you know I’m gonna run away with Hana one day right?” Y/N teases Hana’s boyfriend Collins, another friend of hers. He instantly gave Aaron a look.

“You okay with that?” Collins laughs a bit making Aaron chuckle and a motion of rolling his eyes. “They are star crossed lovers” he jokes making Aaron laugh.

“I have competition” Aaron laughs sitting in the circle booth beside Y/N. “I’m Aaron”

“We know! We hear a lot about you from little Miss Y/N” Hana smiles. “Again, it’s Hana. But you haven’t met Collins”

“My first name is Emmett but everybody calls me by the last” Collins smiles shaking hands with Aaron.

“Nice to meet you. Is it only you two?”

“Nah Gia is coming, but she’s carpooling with Terrance” Y/N smiles before looking to the two. “First round on me?”

“Uh. Yes. Ms. Orthopedic Surgeon that makes a shitton more money than little ol’ journalist I call myself” Collins laughs before getting up. “I’ll get the drinks with you”

“Awesome, Guinness babe?” Y/N smiles as Aaron nods. She climbed over his lap kissing his cheek before going with Collins to the bar.

“Sooo. I’ve heard the story a million times from Y/N. But I’d love to hear it from you about how you two meet”

“Well, besides working in a practice specifically for sports medicine and Ortho surgery. I get called to consult all the time or go to the ER when one of my athletes end up there. But this one time when I was called, Y/N took the trauma—“

——

“Hey I was paged for a consult?” Aaron steps into the trauma room being handed a tablet by the nurse to check the x-rays they received of the patient. “He—

“He’s got a fracture in his talus, but a break in his fibula. The talus can easily be cases but the fibula break is causing a hematoma so we’ll need to take care of that” Y/N practically runs it all as Aaron stood their in awe and confusion.

“Uh. Why was I paged if you’re the Ortho surgeon?”

“First day babe. I didn’t page yea, the trauma doc did. But you can happily assist me” Y/N smiles making Aaron smile as well. “Get me another set of pre-op scans and I’ll meet you in the OR” She smiles at Aaron passing by him when she finished for the eval.

Once they were in the OR doing their work...

“You have a gentle touch to your work for an Ortho surgeon”

“What can I say? I’m not the meanest Ortho surgeon”

“You saying I’m mean?”

“All I know about you private practice boys, is that you handle around the same group of patients. And don’t think I don’t know you Dr. Aaron Conners in orthopedic sports medicine. You yourself have flawless work and even if the mallet in your hand to fix in the break says otherwise, you’re probably one of the calmest Ortho surgeons I’ve ever worked with” Y/N smiles under the mask catching the gaze from Aaron.

“Does this mean I can get your name?”

“Buy me a drink after work then maybe” She teases. “Dr. Y/F/N Y/L/N. First day at this hospital but not my first rodeo”

“I can tell”

——

“Y’all are cute. Y’know that?”

“Am I supposed to instantly say the same as a courtesy?”

“Bitch. I don’t need you to tell me Emmett and I are cute. I know we fucking are” Hana smiles laughing with Aaron.

“Hana!” Gia cheers finally joining them and sliding beside Hana.

“Girl. Fucking finally. Where’s Terrance?”

“At the bar getting our drinks and taking to your man’s and...your lady” Gia smiles at Aaron. “It’s so nice to finally meet the man that has Y/N’s heart! It’s Gia”

“Aaron, lovely to meet you”

“Right back atcha” Gia smiles as Y/N slides in beside Aaron setting his beer down feeling him instantly wrapped his arm around her shoulders.

“See you’ve met Gia, this is Terrance” Y/N smiles gestures to the guy sitting on the other side of her.

“Hey man” Terrance smiles as Aaron moves his hand up Y/N’s shoulder when he felt got closer to Y/N.

Aaron had a worried look on his face but it was unreadable by others. Except for Y/N. Y/N kisses Aaron’s cheek smiling after she did such, seeing him smile after.

A few rounds of drinks went by and they were all around the dart board taking turns. Aaron hugged the wall with Collins and Gia as the other three take their turn of a game. Aaron looking too much into the fact that when Y/N high fives Terrance, he held her hand after. Only reassuring thing is she pulled her hand away and shot Aaron a smile. Terrance gave him a look while twirling the dart before continuing with the game.

“Hey babe?” Aaron calls as Y/N sets her glass on the table before wrapping her arms around his waist looking up at him.

“Yeah baby?”

“I love you”

“I love you more” Y/N smiles big as Aaron leaned down kissing her lovingly while Terrance watches as he broke the dart in his hand.

“Yo. Terrance I ain’t fucking paying for new darts” Hana smacks him in the chest before taking her turn in the game.

Y/N looked over when her friend snapped at the other. She laughs a bit to herself as Aaron gave him a glaring stare to back down from whatever he’s doing.

“Hey Y/N. Wanna get the next round of drinks with me?” Terrance asks as Y/N nods with a smiles parting from Aaron to go with him to the bar.

Aaron watched from afar seeing Terrance try and fail to do anything. Y/N kept pushing his hand away when he tried to wrap his arm around her shoulders, pulled herself away when he got uncomfortably close, and the moment they got their drinks Y/N pretended to be clumsy and drop her drink on his pants. Terrance didn’t care as he was head over heels but she gave him a played worried look before carrying the drinks she didn’t spill back.

“What number makes that?”

“8”

“What?” Aaron looks at Collins and Gia confused as they laughed at each other for a moment.

“This isn’t her first time doing that to him. He won’t take the idea so”

“She spills her drink and sneaks back to us” Gia laughs sipping the last of her drink. “Terrance is obsessed with her but she is so devoted to you that she has her ways of rejecting him”

“Has she ever just told him no?”

“The bitch doesn’t take no and it’s funny”

“Funny?”

“She tossed his phone into the fountain and the next thing you know. Her and I were running to the subway while he fished for his phone” Gia laughs a bit as Y/N walks over to the three rolling her eyes while handing Aaron his drink. “That makes 8 sweet face”

“Oh I know” Y/N laughs a bit to herself before taking Aaron’s hand into hers. “You wanna get out of here before he comes back?”

“Isn’t that rude?”

“Babe the way you were glaring at him. Tells me you don’t want him to be around me. Come on we can take the subway and when we get home” Y/N went on her tippy toes whispering into Aaron’s ear of what they’ll be doing at home.

“Okay—let’s go”

“Let’s go jealous boy” Y/N smiles laughing as she drags Aaron out of there making him roll his eyes for a moment before looking back.

“It was nice meeting y’all!” Aaron states as he got dragged.

“WE GOTTA HANG WITHOUT THE BOY NEXT TIME” Hana smiles as the group waves them off.

Aaron grabbed Y/N’s coat along with his at the coat rack on their way out.

“Was me being jealous that noticeable?”

“Babe it was seeping out of you”

#bill hader #bill hader gifs #bill hader x reader #aaron conners x reader #aaron conners #trainwreck #sorry this took so long!!

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drabblily · 4 years ago

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HQ boys according to my brother

sigh...so i decided to send pictures of some haikyuu boys to my younger brother who hasn’t seen haikyuu, he guessed their names and put some of his opinions about them....

please enjoy i was CACKLING at half of these--

Asahi - Xavier, the middle aged 35 year old dad who comes to the game just to support and watch

Lev - Jordan, whose head is too long

Sakusa - Tanner, whose hair looks stupid (my sister said he looks like a Jake instead)

Atsumu - Brian, looks like an idiot apparently

Osamu - Cole, nerd who gets bullied for his huge eyebrows

Aone - Andrew, who got his haircut from super cuts and looks stupid as hell

Bokuto - Garou from one punch man, looks like a shark

Akaashi - Conner or Isaac

Nishinoya - Russel, that one dude who thinks he’s super cool, is a turtle

Tsukishima - Arthur or Jimmmy (yes three Ms apparently his parents named him this because they thought it was cool smh), no athletic skill, is a nerd

Ushijima - Josh (added onto this, when i told my friends this, ellie said his full name would be Joshua but everyone calls him josh and he gets PISSED about it UAFJDBV)

Tendou - Hisoka with more tan skin (he’s not wrong...)

Sugawara - John or a japanese name starting with a K (very impressive that he could guess that his name would start with a K)

Kenma - Aaron or Justin, gamer with no life--if my brother was a girl, he “wouldn’t even like him”

Oikawa - Zack, looks like a snapping turtle, but his color scheme is cool at least

Daichi - Logan or Caleb, square-rectangle head

Kageyama - Shino, the quiet kid who keeps...weapons in his backpack, brother approved, would be friends with him

Terushima - Marshall, looks like a shark, is a goth (because of his tongue piercing apparently LHDVBDV)

Kuroo - Bryce, the jock or bully that thinks hes so cool and either everyone hates him or everyone wants to hang with him

Daishou - Gato, the dude that was in Naruto in the first 20 episodes

Goshiki - Tsutolee, the abomination love child between Rock Lee from Naruto and Tsukiyama from tokyo ghoul, called his bowlcut extremely dumb/ugly </3

Iwaizumi - Hajime, another shark (he actually got this right for some weird reason after three tries)

taglist: @humanitysbiggestsimp @sugasugawarau @lcnelyinthesky @ukaiscigarette @visaintes @myeggodied

#haikyuu #hq #haikyuu!!#haikyuu crack #crack post #haikyuu boys #haikyuu headcanons #haikyuu headcannons #haikyuu hcs #bark bark👺

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fangirl-imagines · 5 years ago

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Headcanons for Dating Aaron Conners

He works really long and sometimes crazy hours as a surgeon so you have lots of simple, relaxing dates at home.

His favorite thing in the world is when he’s exhausted after work and the two of you curl up on the sofa and watch a basketball game.

So. Many. Basketball games.

He’s not opposed to watching whatever you want too but no promises that he won’t fall asleep in the middle of it but hey, at least he tries.

He hates horror movies though. If you watch one he just points out all the medical inaccuracies.

LeBron knows everything about your relationship. Like seriously everything. Sorry, but Aaron is very gossipy and can’t help himself.

He is an extremely considerate boyfriend. You’ve got a hard week at work? He’ll order take out so you don’t have to worry about it. You had a fight with your best friend? He’s got the wine and ice cream and is ready to talk it out. You’re sick? He’s not leaving your side until you’re better.

Also it’s cannon that he eats his girlfriend out a lot so….just gonna leave that there.

Riding in a car with him means jamming out to 80′s pop music.

He would have the softest, coziest shirts and sweaters for you to “borrow”. Same with basketball shorts.

He loves seeing you in his shirts. He gets a big goofy smile when he sees you.

Lots of pda. Nothing major but plenty of hand holding and he’s not afraid to kiss you in public either.

Out of all Bill’s characters Aaron is the most romantic. He is the type to send you flowers at work or leave sweet notes for you around your house.

Once you two start saying I love you, he says it all the time. He tells you every time one of you leaves for the day and ends every phone conversation with it.

He hates fighting with you. He hates confrontation in general but it bothers him with you especially.

He read that it’s bad for the two of you to go to bed angry so he refuses for the two of you to go to bed during a fight.

He’s very level headed so if you have anxiety or are stressed out he’s always there to help you reason things out.

He is also a sassy bitch though so there are always sarcastic comebacks to be had.

You’re his best friend, seriously he tells you everything and just wants to be around you as much as possible.

#aaron conners #aaron conners x reader #aaron conners imagine #dr aaron conners #dr aaron conners x reader #dr aaron conners imagine #trainwreck #trainwreck imagine #trainwreck x reader #bill hader #bill hader imagine #bill hader x reader

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haderberkman · 5 years ago

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You’re Just Jealous

Aaron Conners X F Reader

Warnings: Language

Requested by: @blueeyed0713

It had been six months since Aaron and Amy broke up. Two days after their breakup, Aaron stormed over to Y/N’s apartment and confessed his feelings. They had been friends for years, but neither of them wanted to admit that they had feelings for each other.

He kissed her, and the rest is history. They began dating, and they’ve never been happier.

Tonight was their six month anniversary, and their friends insisted that they should come with them to New York’s hottest club. Of course, they told their friends yes and changed into club appropriate clothes.

Y/N and Aaron arrived at the club and walked in hand in hand. They made their way over to their friends who were sitting in a booth. They slid into the booth and waved down a waiter to get some drinks.

They talked, drank, and laughed with their friends. Aaron was in the middle of telling a story about his most recent surgery when Y/N heard the most annoying laugh. She whipped her head around and saw the only person in the world that she hated.

Aaron gave Y/N a confused look before he turned around and saw his ex Amy chugging a beer. She finished the drink and stumbled her way back to the bar.

“What’s Amy doing here?”

“Probably looking for a guy to either get a STD from or give one to.”

Y/N turned back around and sighed.

Aaron grabbed her hand and leaned over, placing a kiss on her cheek. He leaned back and smiled at her.

“I’m here with you, not her. You have nothing to worry about. Don’t let her ruin our night.”

“I trust you, Aaron. It’s her that I don’t trust. I just don’t like her at all. She’s literally the last person I wanted to see tonight.”

“I know, babe.”

Aaron wrapped his arm around her shoulders, pulling her closer to him. He kissed her head and took a drink of his beer. He shifted a little then stood up.

“I’m gonna go to the bathroom.”

“Okay.”

Aaron leaned down and placed a kiss on her lips. He pulled away and turned around walking towards the bathrooms. Y/N turned back to her friends to continue their conversation, but she was interrupted by someone clearing their throat.

She turned and saw Amy standing there with a drink in her hand. Y/N was getting ready to open her mouth to speak when Amy dumped the cold beer onto her. She look at Amy with a shocked look, and Amy snickered.

“What the hell was that for?”

“You stole Aaron from me. He was mine, and you took him.”

Y/N rolled her eyes at Amy and scoffed. She didn’t want to get into an argument with Amy on her and Aaron’s night out with friends, but she didn’t have any other choice.

“Okay, look. I didn’t steal Aaron from you. You cheated on him, like the whore you are, and he broke you with you. You’re just jealous because he’s with me and not you. You had the most amazing guy on the face of the earth, and you went and fucked it up. That’s not my fault. Aaron and I are happy, so leave us the fuck alone.”

Amy turned and ran out of the bar with her hands concerning her face. Y/N look up and saw Aaron standing there with a surprised look on his face. He walked over to her and helped her stand up.

“That was fucking amazing. Are you okay?”

“Yeah, I’m just wet because she poured a fucking beer in me like a psycho.”

“Come on, let’s get you home and into some dry clothes.”

They said goodbye to their friends as the left the club. Aaron’s apartment wasn’t too far from the club so they decided to walk. Y/N began shivering, and Aaron placed his jacket around her shoulders in an attempt to keep her warm.

As soon as they made it to Aaron’s apartment, he drug Y/N to his bedroom and found clothes for her to change into. She walked into his en-suite bathroom and changed. She finished changing and opened the bathroom door to find Aaron in his bed waiting in her.

Y/N climbed into his bed, and Aaron wrapped his arms around her. She leaned up and kissed his lips. She pulled back and laid her head on his chest listening to the beat of his heart.

She was comfortable in Aaron’s arms. She was happy to be there, and there was no other place that she would want to be. She’s glad that she’s the person Aaron is wrapped around instead of Amy.

#bill hader #bill hader x reader #aaron conners imagine #aaron conners x reader #aaron conners #trainwreck

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myeverythingisyourstruly · 5 years ago

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Request: Aaron Conners on a date with anyone besides Amy Schumer

Let me know if you guys would like me to write more Aaron because I absolutely adore him 🥰

Aaron Conners x reader

Here we go again.

This was the third time your friends tried setting you up and quite frankly you were over it. All three of your best friends had met the man of their dreams and were in committed relationships while one was even engaged.

It’s safe to say you felt a little left out at times but that didn’t mean you always wanted to meet random guys your friends had swore up and down would be good for you. On this particular night you were at Kayla’s place where you and your close friends had come over for an intimate dinner party. There was also a man here you didn’t recognize who apparently was a doctor - he also happened to be single.

Clearly this was a setup but you decided to be nice and play along.

He introduced himself as Aaron Conners and so far he seemed like a pleasant person. There was no denying he was quite attractive. You sat across from him at the dinner table and noticed him stealing glances every once in a while.

Eventually he struck up a conversation with you and in no time had you laughing and feeling like you made the right decision in coming.

At some point in the night you realized everyone else had migrated to the living room while you and Aaron were still at the dinner table, wrapped up in your own little world. He had just finished telling you a funny story about one of his patients that once again had you giggling and that’s when you noticed it got quiet.

You looked up and he was staring at you, assessing what was in front of him. It made you blush a little.

“What?”

He opened his mouth to speak but stopped before anything was said. He was hesitating.

You were slightly amused but your face fell into a frown. That got him to finally speak.

“I hope this isn’t too forward but...you’re very beautiful.”

Now you were definitely blushing.

“Thank you.” You replied quietly.

He smiled and said, “Hey, I was thinking of getting a late night snack at this donut shop around the corner. They have the best apple fritters I’ve ever tasted. Would you like to walk with me…?”

He seemed a little nervous in asking you which only made it more cute.

You said yes.

As you two were heading near the front door you stopped to silently signal to Kayla you were leaving with Aaron. She smirked and gave you a wink.

The walk was fairly quick and the inside of the donut shop was small and very homey. The aroma hit you as soon as you walked in and the display of delicious treats had your mouth watering.

It was also pretty quiet since you two were the only customers. But that wasn’t what had you laughing…

“Don’t take this the wrong way but...do your friends have a kink for setting you up? Because I feel like this isn’t a one time thing.”

The question surprisingly triggered a cackle from you. You covered your mouth in embarrassment but Aaron just laughed along with you.

“Um, yeah they do this all the time. But in this case I think they got it right.” You couldn’t help but smile.

“I think so too.” He smiled back.

It wasn’t long before you two made it back to the front of Kayla’s house. You were leaning against your car door preparing to part ways with Aaron, even though you didn’t really want to.

“Well it’s getting late so I’m gonna head home but it was really nice meeting you Aaron. I had a good time.”

“Me too y/n. This is the most fun I’ve had in a while actually. Is that sad?”

“No, not at all.” A soft smile was permanently etched on your face.

He stepped a little closer and you got a waft of his cologne. “Can I see you again?” He asked in a very sweet, low tone.

Your heart thumped but you played it cool. “I’d like that. Here, let me see your phone.”

He had a glint of humor in his eyes as he handed over his phone but you could see he was confused. “If you’re gonna go through my photos I should warn you my sports buddies send me a lot of weird stuff.”

“No silly,” you giggled. “I’m giving you my number to call me.”

“Oh riiight,” he whispered. “I will definitely do that.”

As you handed his phone back his fingers lightly grazed yours and you two let it linger for a little longer than necessary. You gave him a soft goodbye before getting into your car and driving away.

Once you made it home and changed into some comfy clothes your phone rang. It was an unknown number so you figured it was Aaron.

“Hello?”

“Hey, I told you I’d call right?”

#bill hader #aaron conners #aaron conners x reader #fanfic #request #aaron is baby #i love him #trainwreck #reader fic

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billhaderlovebot · 5 years ago

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of heartbreak and raviolis - aaron conners

summary: you're sick and tired of everyone taking advantage of your best friend, aka aaron conners, aka the most wonderful man in the world, aka the man you love. not so subtle amy bashing fic.

tags: @whoseblogsthis @mpmarypoppins @a-second-hand-sorrow

aaron conners had always had shitty taste in women. you'd mainly thought so because none of the women he'd ever picked happened to be you.

aaron was too soft. too soft for this world and the men and women in it. they would break him. they would ball up the effervescent, unconditional kindness and love he had for people and shove it right back down.

amy was going to break him, too.

you knew she would.

and, oh, how you hated her. you hated her and how unreliable she was and the infuriating vapidness within her and her terrifying lack of respect for the man you had loved since you were seventeen. your best friend.

watching him kiss her was hell. watching him fall for her, knowing he was gone and there was nothing you could do about it, was worse.

but he was so happy, and he looked at her like she'd hung the moon.

it fucking hurt.

because you were tired of sitting by while everyone took advantage of how fucking nice he always was.

because you knew what was coming. and you didn't have the heart to say "i told you so".

"hey, hey, slow down, honey, i can't understand you."

aaron was crying. his voice came broken and shuddering down the line, trying desperately to get something out that wasn't cut with a sob burning from his chest. but you already knew what he was going to say. you knew, and you were pulling on a sweater and grabbing your keys before he could explain.

"she... she said-" and he couldn't get it out. the sound of his heartbreak made your own heart shatter.

"im coming over." you breathed, slamming the door and heading out into the night to comfort the man you had always wanted but could never have.

---

amy had cheated. actually, amy had been cheating for quite some time. she had never stopped, in fact.

you'd been tangled together on aaron's couch, a mass of crying and limbs and throw blankets, for hours now.

"i thought she loved me." aaron scoffed, staring blankly out of the window to where the sun was just beginning to rise over new york.

his head was in your lap and the only thing keeping him tethered to sanity was your hand threading through his hair. "she said she loved me."

he let out a mirthless laugh, and you were suddenly furious.

"i'm so fucking angry." you whispered, eyes intent on aaron's face, angled towards the sunrise, the remnants of heartbreak in shining tracks down his cheeks.

"why?" he inquired, turning over to look up at you.

"because... because this shouldn't happen, aaron. not to you."

---

light snores filled the quiet apartment as aaron drifted off in your arms. he had moved so that his face rested in the crook of your shoulder, his hand draped over your waist. you couldn't help but feel that this was a little bit not fair. it wasn't the first time something like this had happened to him, and it wasn't the first time you'd had to hold him and comfort him and pretend you hadn't been painfully in love with him since high school. so here you were, again, the doting, supportive best friend. again. fuck.

in sleep, he looked younger. in sleep, he looked content, save for the small wrinkle between his eyebrows, the remainder of the day's emotional strain. it disappeared with the gentle press of your lips against the soft skin, and aaron unconsciously held onto you a little tighter. your heart ached as it did when you were a teenager.

when, at seventeen, you lay eyes on him at a house party, shrouded in smoke and coloured lights and the thumping bass of some nondescript vaporwave track, your heart skipped, like, twelve beats or something.

and, when, blue eyed and floppy haired, he looked back at you, raising his red plastic cup, your heart fell out of your ass. upon trying to talk to the guy who had so quickly stolen your heart, you spilled your vodka soda all over him. he tipped his own drink over your head. you stared at each other for several solid seconds of short lived fury, and then cracked up, immediately going to find more alcohol. you were best friends from that day on.

you were the one who supported him through medical school, helping him study and walking to campus every morning to give him coffee and whatever baked good you deemed acceptable. bidding him goodbye with a kiss on the cheek and the promise of a movie marathon.

you endured aaron's many vapid, fake-nice, passive-aggressive girlfriends who would loathe you and shoot you looks that, should they kill, would have you six feet fucking under.

you pushed how deeply in love with him you were right down below the surface, because his happiness was more important to you.

you thought, now, almost a decade later, as he had cried in your arms for hours about a woman that didn't feel the same, that it might be time for you to get your feelings in order and fucking tell him that all you wanted was for him to take you in his arms and kiss you fucking senseless.

and then they got back together.

"aaron, you fuck- you what?" you were absolutely livid, like, struggling-to-hold-the-phone-without-smashing-it-into-someone's-face livid.

"um, i, i just really want to make it work with her, and she was really sorry, and-"

"aaron, she broke your fucking heart."

"yeah, i know, i-

"and i was the one to let you cry your fucking eyes out on me for hours, even though it hurt. i've stood by for years, watching people hurt you and knowing there was nothing i could do about it."

"i'm not your responsibility, honey." he said. "this is my own life and i... you don't have to be involved."

"how can you fucking say that, aaron? of course i do. i won't let her do this to you again. i'm your best fucking friend, is that not enough for you?"

"...i guess not."

you'd never wanted to beat aaron to death before, but if he continued being so fucking stupid, you'd advise him not to put it past you. there was a deafening silence on the phone after that, because there was nothing you could say to change his mind, and nothing he could say that would make you not want to murder amy townsend. or him.

"i won't do this anymore." you finally said, a lump in your throat.

"what?"

"pretend that... that i'm not in love with you so that i can be okay with the manipulative assholes you pick as girlfriends."

"wh-?"

"goodbye, aaron."

---

the month that followed was probably the worst month of your entire life. you didn't speak to aaron once. no calls, no emails, no 2am visits to listen to billy joel and eat junk and talk about how you both carried the weight of the world on your shoulders. you'd always shared that weight, and, now, it was like someone had torn you in half and left you bleeding.

you were halfway through the last episode of season ten of friends, and your second box of cold pop tarts, crying your eyes out, when the doorbell rang. you wiped your eyes with the sleeve of one of aaron's old college sweaters and dragged yourself up from the couch. your breath caught in your throat at the sight of the disheveled, very attractive man hyperventilating in front of you when the front door swung open.

"aaron?" you stumbled over your thrift store welcome mat you bought because of the blue cat on it, holding yourself up on the door frame and staring up at him in sleepy disbelief.

"hi, yes, hi." aaron was breathing hard, the aftermath of running the whole two miles to your apartment in the middle of the night. "i've been thinking a lot about... about what you said, and i just, i've missed you, yknow? and, i, um, not that that makes everything okay, because i didn't listen to you, and it sucked, and-"

"what do you want?" you asked, trying not to punch him. "i'm tired, aaron. and not just physically. i'm tired of waiting around for you to love me."

"oh, well that's, um, that's good." he nodded, peeling off his jacket. "sorry, um, im sweaty-"

"that's good?" you blinked. aaron was clueless at the best of times, but this was insane.

"yes, yeah, because i realised something, um, just now, at home, with amy."

"i really don't want to hear about amy right now-"

"no, i know, i just, um, i realised that she's not who i want." he shrugged.

"it's about fucking time, aaron, i swear to god-"

"you're my best friend, and... i meant what i said, yknow, about that not being enough for me."

aaron ducked under the doorframe, bending down to capture your lips with his own. your eyes widened, and you froze up, your arms at your sides. the fact that aaron conners was kissing you just wouldn't compute.

and then it did, and you were kissing him back, your arms flying around his neck and your fingers twisting into his hair.

the kiss was searing, and your skin burned where his hands trailed across your cheeks, cupping your jaw, and up the back of your shirt, ghosting across your hip bones.

even when you stumbled back into your apartment, falling backwards over the couch, aaron was relentless, attaching his lips to your neck as if nothing was amiss.

what stood out to you was how easy this was. how you were able to fall into place so quickly as if you'd been doing this for years. as if you hadn't been pining for him for half your life.

"hey," you broke the kiss, gazing up at him in all his blue eyed, flustered, swollen-lipped glory. "hey, we have some, ah, things to talk about, i think."

aaron nodded, swallowing. "yeah, um, yeah."

you pecked his lips, closing your eyes. you just wanted to be someone who had kissed aaron conners, no complications, for a few seconds longer.

"raviolis?" he asked quietly, still hovering above you with that signature, heart-melting grin.

"it's 1am, aaron."

"i know a guy."

#aaron conners #trainwreck #aaron conners x reader #bill hader

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a19yearoldtryinherbest · 5 years ago

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Not Her. Pt 2 [Aaron Conners]

Masterlist

Part 1

Prompt: Aaron waits long enough.

Pairing: Aaron Conners x OFC

Warning: Nothing. Fluff.

A/N: Long time coming part two.

Word count: 1838

• • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • •

LeBron was a really good friend. However when it came to dating advice he wasn't that good, so when Aaron told him about his date with Isabella he said he should text her right away anyway. So Aaron did as he was told. It was only an invitation to watch a game, nothing too serious, but she replied "Not ready yet" and she was right but he was afraid. What if he would never be ready? What if he wasn't ready fast enough and he loosed her? So he texted "Would you wait?" To which she replied "Don't rush it" he wasn't sure if she meant don't rush our relationship or don't rush your healing but he didn't ask he just tried to figure out how to move on.

He wasn't sure how to care for himself in that way. He was a great guy, supportive, attentive and caring, but not with himself. He wasn't the best at handling his emotions, especially if they were bad ones, so he asked LeBron for help. He went to meditation, yoga, talked to his friend. Finally therapy did the trick, and he started to work out other thing besides his failed romance with Amy. Realizing she hadn't been the problem, and it wasn't her the solution. He felt good. He didn't felt like he needed someone for him to love, he wanted to be in an actual, adult relationship and not something as one-sided as his previous relationships had apparently been. He hoped it would be with Isabella but he was sure to make peace with it if it wasn't her.

He got home that day, right after a surgery, still feeling that calming thrill that was right then mixing with the calming thrill she gave him. He sat on his couch and looked at his cellphone, seeing the short conversation they had more than six months before. He read and re-read the last text "Don't rush it" — I'm not rushing it. — he assured himself before calling.

— Hi. — answered Isabella and Aaron felt his heart rush.

— Hi- hey. — he smiled — I-it's Aaron. LeBron's friend.

— Yeah, I got you on my phone. What's up?

— I was wondering if you would let me pay you back for that dinner?

She thought about it, it had been about two months were she didn't get a single text from him, she remembered the date how nice he was even if his heart wasn't in it, and now maybe it would be better, so she gave him a shot.

She was arriving a few minutes late at the restaurant. She knew it but she had always loved to make an entrance, and, in her head, it was a way to show she wasn't waiting around for him, even if she had for the past months. She saw him sitting at the table, it was a fancier please than the time before and he was wearing a baby blue, buttoned up shirt and some dress pants. His demeanor was a bit nervous until he saw her walking towards him. She saw him check her out quickly, swallowing dry as he looked back to her face. She was wearing a ruched emerald green dress with a lace falling from a soft knot on the right side, an adornment that detailed her figure and fitted her perfectly. He had forgotten how beautiful she was, he only remembered how nice and sweet she was, how understanding and funny. He had forgotten how smooth her brown skin was, how her enchanting smile made him blush the first time they met, how funny she was and how easy of a laugh she had.

And it felt great, talking to her, getting to know her. He learned she was really into sports, but not the teams, just the festivities it created, she read a lot but mostly romantic novels, throwing one or two classics ever so often, she knew quite enough Spanish to carry a conversation but was terrible at spelling, both in Spanish and English. He also picked upon the fact that she would bite her lower lip if he said something dumb that made her smile, or that she would throw her head back and hold her stomach if something made her laugh too hard. He had wondered how he hadn't notice any of that when they went on the first date, and then he scolded himself remembering it was because he was so hung up on Amy.

She was peaceful but not boring, intimate but not quiet, and, most of all, understanding and empathetic. She was perfect in every way, the way one is supposed to be. He wished to spend the rest of his life with her, so he set himself to not screw it up. He wasn't gonna rush it like he had done so many times, he wasn't gonna accidentally push his feelings completely aside just to please her, he wasn't gonna make the same mistake he had done so many times,if anything he was gonna make new mistakes and work through them.

They kept going on dates, hanging out, chatting and getting to know each-other for two months before officially starting dating. Aaron had always been a hopeless romantic and, even if she wasn't much of a romantic herself, it was nice to wake-up to breakfast and being surprised a work with some flowers. They had been dating for a bit over five months that they settled a double date with LeBron and his wife at Aaron's apartment.

That morning Isabella had woken up, changed for work, came back from work and changed for the dinner all at his apartment, just like the three days before, and like many other times in that month. She had a toothbrush, some creams, some make-up and a drawer full of clothes at his place, he felt fairly certain they were ready to move in together but he didn't want to say anything without really knowing what she thought of it. However that answer was delivered to him right after the dinner. As Isabella made coffee for them and their guest, Aaron washed the few plates they had used since the dishwasher was busted again.

— You should really get a new one. — said LeBron as he slowly dried the washed dishes — It's like the third time it's busted in two months, right?

— Yeah. I just haven't gotten around it. — he explained, as he closed the water tap and looked for something to dry his hands with — I don't know which one to get, though. — Isabella saw him trying not to get the floor wet and passed him a couple paper towels, he thanked him quietly and gave her a quick kiss without thinking it twice.

LeBron and his wife shared a approving look on their friend's behavior — You should get one like ours, bought it four years ago, not one problem, so far. — Savannah said as Isabella passed her and her husband their cups of coffee.

— Yeah, we should get one of those. — agreed Isabella. No one noted it but Aaron heart stopped for a second when he heard the "we" she said. We should get one. We. It was all he needed to ask her. And, after his friends left he asked her.

— Hey. — he said and she looked up from the glass she was washing. It was quite late, he had cleaned the table and swept the floor, and now he was going to ask her — Would you want to move in with me?

Isabella didn't answer, she didn't say anything, she just froze, completely still. Water from the tap still falling into and out of the glass, as she tried to gather her thoughts. Her first instinct was yes, her second instinct was I can't do that, and now she was trapped between the words what do I say?

On the other end of the conversation was Aaron, panicking a little, not visibly thought. He was afraid to be pushing her into commitment so he tried to fix it — Or not. It's okay if you don't want to.

— No, it's not that. — she mumbled, finally closing the tap and leaving the glass to dry.

— I just though that you are kind of living here any- Wait. — he stopped to a halt, his brain just now processing what she had said — What? — he asked but she paid no mind, caught thinking of what he had said.

She half smiled, taking a kitchen rag to dry her hands — I guess you're right, I have been sleeping here all week, haven't I? — she realized, Aaron nodded with a sweet smile, she smiled back quickly. She left the kitchen rag on the counter and crossed her arms and moved next to the counter so she could lean against it — I-. there's this thing you don't know. — she paused and exhaled to chase out her nerves — The last time I moved in with someone was about nine years ago. We had been dating for the better part of a year and it seemed right and we were young and in-love, and-. And about two years later we were engaged. And... He died six months before the wedding. — Aaron moved closer, trying to know whether to hug her or wait. He decided to wait just behind the corner of the island counter — It was unbearable, for a really long time, but now it doesn't hurt every single second, and I don't think about him as much, even if he is still on my mind. But the thing is; I never got this far with anyone after him. I couldn't. But now I can and it somehow makes me feel worse, like if, by moving in with you, I'm betraying him. — she looked at him. Her eyes weren't tearful but they were sad, and she asked him — Is that dumb?

— No. — he said as he came closer to her, putting his hand on the side of her upper back — It's completely understandable, love.

She let go of herself and wrapped her arms around his waist, almost hiding on his chest — You really think so? — he held her back without even thinking of it.

— Absolutely. — he assured, sincere, and left a sweet kiss on the top of her forehead that made her look up.

A smile lingered on her lips as she slightly snuggled against him — I would very much like to move in with you.

He looked down at her, a bit surprised by her words — Are you sure?

— Absolutely. — she said, before leaning upwards to kiss him softly.

He felt so profoundly happy by that one word. He was sure there wasn't another woman in the world for him. Not like her.

#bill hader #bill hader imagines #bill hader x reader #bill hader x OFC #bill hader x you #Aaron Conners #aaron conners x reader #dr aaron conners #aaron conners imagine #aaron conners x OFC #Trainwreck

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derekklenadaily · 5 years ago

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Derek’s Break A Bat Podcast episode review/synopsis!

Break A Bat Podcast is one of the programs of the Broadway Podcast Network. The three hosts; Al Malafonte, Dougie Horowitz and Erin Conners created this series for many fans to hear both sides of mediums such as the stage/screen and sports related from their favorite performer. We hear fun and intimate conversations throughout the episode!

I found this interview was the best one out of all of interviews that Derek had in the past. The interviewers really went through of research on Derek's work before he came on and had such great new questions that we didn't often hear about before in previous interviews that he had.

The hosts and Derek discusses that there are similarities with baseball and theater. Derek agrees, they have the similar kind of task and profession. He says that working out and adapting to the schedule can be both physically and mentally exhausting at times. But he says playing sports from previous years helped him condition and adapt his endurance on Broadway, especially doing it eight times a week.

In the past, Derek gave an insight of his pathway from a baseball pitcher to Broadway actor in various engagements. But in this interview, he gave whole a lot more informative on his experience with theater and baseball throughout high school and college at UCLA, and how he decided to part ways from playing baseball (after realizing how difficult the road would be to become a professional baseball player in the league) and pursue a career as a performer. He told a long-story short about getting his foot in the door, getting his job in New York after being discovered by a Broadway World reviewer and Marc Shaiman heard him sing "Good-Bye" and asking him for a recording for as Aaron Tveit’s standby in Catch Me If You Can before coming to Broadway. After going through several call-backs and rehearsals, it didn't wind up working out but he was offered by a casting director for another project which was an off-Broadway run of Carrie the musical which was his first and official job in New York.

The hosts and Derek discusses again with the similarities with baseball and theatre. It’s really enjoyable to listen to him and the hosts practically ramble on the background of baseball and etc like any kind of sports analysts before the actual game starts on television. They agree that theatre and baseball both have the same ideas such as practicing over and over again to become successful at what you do, having certain preparations for it whether it’s theater or baseball. Derek compares what was it like to be performing on the field and performing on stage.

Then he talks about his time in Anastasia, working with Christy Altomare (Anya/Anastasia Romanov) who he worked with in the past in Carrie the musical as a high school sweethearts, and John Bolton (Vlad Popov) who he still keeps in touch as well. They discuss about the song “Learn To Do it” (they ask Derek if it was like throwing baseball statistics at him) and how it was just a highlight of the show, sharing the fun and companionship on the show. He says that being in that kind of industry is great because he enjoys meeting similar faces and new faces, working with them and developing life-long friendships.

He talks about Nick’s character development and challenges he faces upon playing the character in the show. He had similarities with Nick when he was younger, having expectations and striving to be the best to achieve things at the highest level. He is often asked by others, “How is it like a younger version of Derek?” He explains that it’s quite difficult to have a similarities to the character but much easier to play a character that is nothing like himself and not have to worry about being criticized as much on the portrayal and just focus on bringing the character to life. He pinpoints some things out his younger brother and him at age eighteen would do. He visualizes what Nick’s head is at throughout the show and claims that he tries to do Nick justice, by figuring out who he is as a young adult and learning from the mistakes that he made.

After Al numbering several previous successful jukebox musicals, he asks Derek about Jagged Little Pill and how the musical just works so well on Broadway. Derek describes how real, fearless and passionate Alanis is through her music. And it was a perfect marriage of Diablo Cody’s writing/working with specific themes in Alanis Morrisette’s Jagged Little Pill album and brought the story to life onstage. Her music relates to the different people and face the harsh reality/truths that we still continue to see today’s world. The actors demonstrate who she is and what she stands for, not necessarily what she went through her in life through music. But he makes it clear that it’s not a biography musical. He brings up a moment where Alanis made her first visit to the workshop, feeling sort of hesitant but once after they performed in front of her, she was absolutely pleased and fulfilled that her story and important messages from her lyrics are being told so very clearly after twenty-five years after the album’s release.

The hosts asks on what Derek has been doing during the quarantine process and Jagged Little Pill being on hiatus. It turns out that Derek has been writing! Perhaps a television show in the future? :)

Towards the end of the episode, each of the hosts gives fire and quick questions to Derek; favorite films - (American Beauty and Shawshank Redemption), favorite places to eat in NYC, top three favorite cast albums (Ragtime, Parade and Spring Awakening), Broadway crush (Patti LuPone), his opinion on Roger Clemens being on the Hall of Fame and being on steroids, best baseball game he ever watched/witnessed (Dodgers vs White Sox World Series), most embarrassing moment on stage (flubbing during “My Petersburg” in Anastasia), memorable moment in his career was doing Dogfight - working with most known director in the theatre industry, Joe Mantello and Tony Award Winning and long time friend/mentor, Lindsay Mendez (Wicked). One of the hosts asks Derek on what was his best advice that he ever gotten. Derek answers, “Prepare.” It’s better to prepare for something in advance rather than having major fears and anxieties over not having materials to work with.

I really enjoyed the episode because it feels really fresh after hearing the same old questions from previous interviews and we got to hear more of what he went through. I felt like Derek was at his comfort zone being around with the hosts and even geek-ing out over many baseball things with them which was really fun to listen to! :)

So if you want to listen to the episode, click [here]

#Derek Klena #broadway podcast network #broadway #break a bat podcast #appearance: break a bat podcast #appearances #review #podcast

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cc00-cinema · 5 years ago

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Trainwreck (2015) dir. Judd Apatow

So, the only reason why I watched a movie with Amy Schumer in it is because Bill Fucking Hader. Like most, I really wanted to watch this film, but was extremely put off by the fact Schumer stared main lead. But all honesty she was bearable, like it was a diluted version (not to sound cruel) Also she’s a pretty good actress in some moments

The movie is pretty much a character study of what happens to the typical main character’s crazy drunk best friend when she goes home? And I really love how they explored it. The damage from childhood (and now) that the main characters have endure are clearly affecting their relationships that ring so true to my own. Commitment and vulnerability issues, not thinking they’re deserving of love (that hits home) Trainwreck presents these awkward or dramatic moments and flawed behaviours and illustrates in a comedic way.

I really enjoy how the dynamic between the two is that Aaron Conners (Bill Harder) isn’t trying to change Amy. He loves her regardless. Also Aaron Conners is my new Doctor dreamy, because good god is he so attractive in this movie. Like they pretty much conjured my perfect type physical wise and personality. Dorky, empathetic and kind, awkward and smart. So good. Also the movie oddly enough has really good actors/actress , like there so no shitty acting (apart from moments with Amy but even then she was pretty solid)

If you’re put off watching ‘Trainwreck’ because Amy Schumer, I would still give it a go because honestly the move is pretty good. Sometimes the pacing is effy and Amy a little yikes but ‘Trainwreck’ is one of the better romcoms personally.

I rate it 7/10

#trainwreck #bill hader #amy schumer #romcom #movie #review #romance

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packsbeforesnacks · 5 years ago

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Dirt Off Your Shoulder || Blanche & Winn

[Part One | Part Two | Side B]

TIMING: Saturday, February 8th, 2020, Noon LOCATION: White Crest General Hospital PARTIES: @harlowhaunted & @packsbeforesnacks SUMMARY: Winn doesn’t die, c’mon, as if. Blanche, exasperated: MEN. WARNINGS: Medical blood, mentions of unhealthy coping mechanisms, potential self-harm.

Winn burst through the doors of the emergency room in the early dawn, shambling and groaning. Nurses were on him in seconds — typical, when a shirtless, shoeless man comes in, covered in blood, with a crossbow bolt sticking out of his shoulder. “It burns, get it out, please.” He fell to his knees, and a nurse’s hand jostled the bolt, causing Winn’s vision to go white and hot and please, please, please no, not like this. He felt himself being hauled up to his feet by firm, unwavering hands, but he knew he was slipping. The Hunter had gotten him good, probably to the bone. Not that Winn would ever find out, if they didn’t get it out of him quickly. The silver sizzled inside of him, and, oh, the lights were brighter now? He dimly felt a hand fiddle in his pants, looking for a wallet, but, fuck, Winn had forgotten it. Here lies, John Doe. A bubble of laughter slipped out of his mouth at the thought. Winn tried to open his eyes, tried to get them to focus, and saw the face of a man, lips pursed in obvious concentration as he assessed the wound. Had that much time passed? Fuck.

“Get him to Surgical Suite A,” the man said, “and get me Rodrigo and Aaron.”

“Yes, Dr. Harlow,” said one of the nurse’s, Winn thought, hoped. But. Wait. Harlow?

“Hey,” he gasped out, tugging on the sleeve of the good doctor as he started to turn away. “Tell Blanche I’m sorry, okay?” He coughed. “Adrien… too…”

That was the last thing that Winn remembered.

“Winn Woods?” Blanche repeated to the nurse looking at her like she had five heads. Blanche remembered her, she had been there when she brought Alain the other night. When she burst into the emergency room half in tears saying she needed help bringing someone in with a head injury. And here she was, again, this time looking for someone else. Adrien texting her asking how the hell she knew his hockey coach and accusing her of making her mother cry had not been great. “What room is he in?” And now she wandered the hospital in search of his room number, head down, hood up, and AirPods in. Her concern for Winn was the only reason she was subjecting herself to GhostVille, and she breathed a sigh of relief as she finally found the right room without having to talk to someone’s Great Aunt Sally.

“Winn?” Blanche poked her head in, relieved a circulating nurse wasn’t here. The one at the desk probably already texted her mother that she was here. Definitely wanted to avoid all forms of family while she was here. She brightened, though, when she saw him in bed. She found him!

Oh, wait, he was injured.

“Winn! Jesus Christ! What happened?”

Winn had woken up, which was a good first step to not being dead, he figured. Dawn had shaken off its frigid dew, burning into a spectacular morning, if the light streaming in through the window was any indication. He took a deep breath, noting the slowly subsiding throbbing in his shoulder — where he’d been shot, he was remembering — and tried to figure out how he’d ended up here. Most of the events after the Hunter — ‘cause it had to be a Hunter, right? who else would be out that early? — had put a bolt in him were blurry, elastic. He remembered finding the tree where he’d tied a pair of pants, bolting to the hospital as fast as his four legs could carry him, not really giving a shit who saw him. Changing back in the bushes, the way the silver lit up his nerves, and then… nothing. Huh. Problematic.

‘Course, more problematic still was Blanche Harlow showing up to his hospital room and— Oh, fuck, had her father operated on Winn? She asked him what happened, and Winn considered his options. He liked Blanche — trusted her way, way more than Noah, and he had found out Winn was a wolf (stellar week for Winn, really). Telling humans wasn’t always a mistake (hell, Winn had ended up a werewolf because some folks had trusted him) and Blanche seemed like the type to know when to keep her mouth shut. (Maybe to her detriment, but Winn couldn’t say much ‘bout that.)

“Close the door, Blanche,” he settled on, voice as even as possible. He paused, before adding, “Please.”

It was then that Blanche remembered his cryptic email from earlier in the week — he knew some secret about her and it had made her anxious enough to ignore his subsequent emails, and then he ignored her text and left her on read, which made her ignore his email about skipping class again. Not that that mattered, because he didn’t look too good. If her dad had seen him that meant it had been really bad. Blanche frowned at him but shut the door anyway — she glanced down the hallways to make sure Dr. Harlow or a visit from Nurse Harlow weren’t in the works. She turned and went to sit in the chair by his bed.

“How are you feeling? Are you feeling alright?”

Winn took a deep breath. “Blanche, do you trust me?”

Blanche stared at him, alarmed. “I— I mean—” Trust him. Sure. But she also kind of thought he was sort of an idiot and wasn’t expecting a question like that. “Of course I do. Why aren’t you answering my questions? Are you high—you told them you smoke, right?” Blanche clamped her mouth shut before she could get going on her anxious tirade of questions.

“‘S okay if you don’t. Trust me, I mean. You, er, might not, here in a minute. You wanna sit down? Wait. ‘Course. You’re sitting already,” he babbled, trying to calm his nerves. Winn had come out to folks all his life, but nothin’ was quite like the frenetic anxiety of tellin’ someone that you turned into a big wolf-creature once a month (... or so). And unlike when he’d told Noah — been, some might say, called out on his shit — Winn didn’t only have to nod his head to give an answer. No, he had to come clean.

Was this what it was like havin’ more than just wolves for friends? It’d been a while since he’d had either.

Another deep breath. “Alright, so. Sorry. Just… a lot. Uh, I’ll answer your actual questions, first. I’m feeling better, since your dad got the fuckin’ crossbow bolt out of me, but for a minute I thought I might be a goner — not tryin’ to scare you, just the way it is — and, uh, I mean, I haven’t… spoken to anyone? Just woke up a few minutes before you got in here. So, no, they don’t know I smoke yet, but ‘m also not high.” He snorted.

Blanche went from confusion, to more confusion, to wondering if she should call a nurse when her mind registered the words crossbow bolt. “You got shot?!” Her voice rose a few octaves, eyes bugging out of her head as she leaned forward on the edge of her seat. “Who?! What?! When?! Were you drinking?! I’ll kill them! What?!”

“Damn it, Blanche, calm down for a sec, I was gettin’ to that.” Winn sighed. “Sorry, I ‘ppreciate the concern, really, but, even if he’s a shit dad, your dad is a halfway decent doc. I’m fine.” A pause, as he studied the younger woman. If Winn wasn’t an only child, he got the feeling that, given his reputation as the Golden Boy of the Zhou-Delacour family, that his younger siblin’ might’ve been like Blanche. Bit of a spitfire, a little too “leap before they look.” Ready to literally kill for their friends, ‘pparently.

“I don’t know who. I already told you what—crossbow bolt, to my shoulder”—he gestured at the gauze packed into his healing wound—“and this mornin’ before I, uh… changed… back.” He let that particular revelation, vague as it was, hang in the air. “And, yeah, I drank a bit yesterday. Might’ve been a bit of an amateur about the aftermath, if ‘m bein’ honest.”

She shot him a look. The look that said she was not happy and also, she hoped, said that you couldn’t just tell someone to calm down after saying you got shot. Blanche opened her mouth to tell him just that, but the mention of her father made the words catch in her throat, a mixture of conflicting emotions on her face. She crossed her arms over her chest, listening, nodding along with his story until… “Wait— back up. You’re doing this well and you were shot this morning?” Blanche said, brows furrowing. “What do you mean changed back? What— Winn! Stop telling the story in parts! I keep getting confused! What’s going on!”

Winn groaned. “Alright, but, promise to just stick with me until I finish talkin’? No runnin’ out of the room. Pinky swear?” He held out his pinky, dead serious.

She made a face at him in disbelief. Now she was imagining the worst — drunk, frat boy shenanigans. Still, she wrapped her pinky around his. “Pinky swear,” Blanche said. “No running. Just tell me what happened.”

“So, I’m a werewolf—” Winn started, or tried to.

“You’re a fucking what?” Blanche immediately blurted out, jaw dropping.

“—and I—” Winn paused, looked Blanche dead in the eyes, and said, “I just asked you to stick with me until I finished talkin’. Whatever happened to ‘Yes and?,’ huh?” He smiled as best he could, given the coil of dread in his gut. “Alright, so, the short version — ‘cause not everythin’ is relevant to how I ended up here — of that story is that there’s a fraternity — shut up — of werewolves down South, and I rushed that fraternity, and I got turned into a werewolf partly because I’m really good at—” He cut himself off.

“Anyway,” he continued. “Some shit went down, I went to Europe for a while, I came back to the States, got some killer”—oops—“therapy, and decided that I wanted to become a counselor.” He’d tell her about Dorian, eventually. About Conner. About Jules. About the worst day of his life. “And I— Uh, I know I said that I would just tell this front-to-back, but y’sound a little like a tea kettle, B. Need a sec?”

Professor Hideki Okamoto had told her he turned into a fox a little after she accused him of being a murderer. Blanche had almost gotten sick then, but maybe that was only because of the dangerous fire trick he pulled… Though judging from the way her stomach tied itself up into a knot and the high-pitched distressed sound that was coming out of her as she sank low in her seat… “Nope,” she wheezed. “Keep going.” This was fine. Blanche knew werewolves existed! It wasn’t the weirdest thing in the world! But maybe it was a combination of the fact that Winn just got shot. “Wait— No.” Blanche held out a hand to stop him. She was about to slide right out of her seat and onto the floor if she kept doing that. Breathe. Get your shit together. She rushed a Hunter with a fucking sword in his hand two days ago! Some news about her friend wasn’t going to get her.

“Was it a Hunter?” Blanche asked, forcing herself to sit back up straight… and lowering her voice so she sounded halfway normal. It wasn’t working. “Oh my god. A Hunter went after you? Does he know you’re you?! Did he see you shift back? Where was this? Who was it? Did you see them?” She was on her feet now, her nervous energy better used as pacing. “Oh my God, I’ll have to get her—” Nell. “—to make you a magic blur bracelet too! Why do they always go after my friends? This sucks! I’ll kill him!”

Winn’s head buzzed, though he guessed he was partly to blame for that—Christ, had he really gone through a 24-pack yesterday? And smoked a bowl? And done some shots? Unhealthy coping mechanisms out the wazoo, he had. Then again, it wasn’t… strictly his fault that his world had gotten flipped on its head. The sheer magnitude of all of that hadn’t left him even if a crossbow bolt had knocked some sense back into him.

“We… are going to talk about all of what you just said later. Because, like, I’ll be honest, I’ve had a real shitty forty-eight hours, and I had no clue that you knew about any of that shit. Though, that, well. That explains the lack of faintin’.” He pursed his lips, humming a low note in the back of his throat. There was a cup of water on his bedside table he hadn’t noticed before, and he gulped it down greedily. Oh God. More of that. Please.

“You’re makin’ my head hurt more with that pacin’, B. Jus’ lemme finish, alright. Deep breaths. I’m here now. I’m alright. I’ve been a werewolf for longer than you’ve known I was a werewolf, and one measly crossbow bolt ain’t gonna take me out”—granted, it almost had—“that easy.”

“But—but—but that doesn’t even make sense!” Blanche burst, looking at him exasperated. “You got shot. By a crossbow!” As if he needed reminding. She let out a small groan though and practically threw herself back into her seat, pulling her knees up to her chest as she stared at him. She would mention, later, that she’d only been on the full train ride to all things Supernatural Fuckery for a few months, but now was a bad time to talk about that. Apparently. She took a deep breath to appease him. “Alright, alright. Continue.”

“So,” Winn started again, hopefully for the last time. He licked his lips. “So, I’m a werewolf, sure. But, apparently, none of my packmates figured I needed to know that wolves weren’t the only things hidin’ in the dark?

“So, Thursday night, I’m tryin’ to figure out why the Arena’s lights are fuckin’ up, and I go back to the electrical room and it’s just covered in ice. Somethin’ whips my phone outta my hand — sorry if you’ve tried to message me since then, by the way, forgot to tell ya for reasons that’ll become clear — and I end up fighting a fuckin’ Zamboni — don’t you dare fuckin’ laugh — with this older guy? An exorcist, I guess? Because ghosts are a real thing now?

“And I’m a pretty good guy, and I can compartmentalize, and it’s all fine, ‘s all good. I turn into a wolf every full moon, ghosts aren’t that big of a stretch. But then I go to this frat party, and I run into a Hunter because of fucking ‘course I do, but we’ve got bigger problems, because a monster tries to suck the fucking bones out of some undergrads. And at that point it occurs to me, y’know, what the fuck. How did I not know any of this shit?

“I get home, I throw myself into my bed, I message Remmy and Ricky to apologize for tellin’ them the chest on the beach isn’t cursed — because what the fuck do I know — and I pass out. And I wake up, and I skip class, and I down, just, copious amounts of booze and smoke pot to cope, because, as I’ll remind you, I had thought werewolves were the only fuckin’ thing around.

“Then, Remmy gets back to me, and mentions folks being able to do magic. And Ricky is a little shit and tells me ‘No duh, the fucking chest is cursed. We tried to tell you!’ And M—”—wait, no—“this other wolf I know, he tells me ‘I don’t know why you’re surprised? Did you not know? There are hundreds of creatures out there!’ and I’m like ‘Are you fuckin’ kidding me.’ So, I drink some more, I smoke some more, and it’s the fucking full moon of all fuckin’ nights.

“I turn, everything is just fine, I am in a part of the woods that I think no one will come out to, but I guess I’m an idiot, and I wandered too close to some asshole Hunter’s territory, so I get a shoulder full of silver bolt and they give chase and, not to scare ya B, but I only got away because I was lucky—or maybe the Hunter was just dumb. Either way, I find my jeans, put ‘em in my maw, and run to the hospital as fast as three-and-a-half limbs can get me. I cried in a bush. It was fine.

“And, uh, yeah, so, I was, y’know, a little bit of an idiot. And now I have a headache. But your dad got the silver out, miracle of miracles, so my arm’s… almost good? I think? It’ll take a little longer to tell.” He stops, giving her some time to let all of that sink in. “So, um, moral to the story, never shift while crossfaded?”

She had so many questions. So many. Blanche stared at him for a long time after he finished speaking. Too long, really. Her mouth hung open slightly, disbelief clouding her features. Maybe it was that she couldn’t believe Winn went to a frat party and fought a monster with bone sucking abilities with a Hunter. Or maybe she wanted to throttle him for being really fucking stupid.

Both. Definitely both.

“I—” she started, and then had to stop. “You—” Nope. “But—” She took another long moment of silence to formulate exactly what she wanted to say. “You fucking moron!” Blanche finally burst, running her hands down her face. “I’m not even a werewolf and I know that! Don’t get crossfaded and do anything other than prepare for the incoming hangover!” Like that ever happened in real life. “Okay, okay, not important. Where was the Hunter’s territory because I’m going to walk my happy ass over there and shove my foot so far down his throat that he’s going to wish I shot him with a crossbow!” Blanche leaned forward on the seat again, staring at him hard for a moment, and considered.

“Iseeghosts,” she blurted out. “There, we’re even.”

Winn blinked. Shesawwhatnow?

“I—” he started, and then had to stop. “You—” Nah. “Wha—” There was a knock at the door, and Winn froze, looking to Blanche for some indication of what the fuck he was supposed to do? “Blanche,” he whispered. “I need you to distract whoever comes through that door. If they check under this gauze, they are going to be pretty fucking confused, and I am going to be, how the kids say, fucked.”

“What do you mean?!” Blanche hissed, her brow furrowing as she stood slightly. “I don’t think I’ll be able to—Dad?!” Jean had let himself in, freezing at the sight of his daughter in the chair next to Winn’s bed. She immediately stood up, body tensing. She hadn’t seen her dad since that night in the gas station and she was not prepared. Knots of anxiety twisted in her and her palms began to get clammy and she felt like she was going to throw up.

“Blanche,” Jean said, stiffly.

“Uh—” She had backed over to the other side of the room while he moved over towards Winn.

“Mr. Woods, I’m glad to see you’re awake. I hope… your friend hasn’t been riling you up. I just want to check your shoulder, and I’ll be on my way to rounds—” Medical jargon started coming from him and Blanche watched in horror as he got closer and closer to Winn. Do something you moron! He trusts you to help!

Crap. What could she say to distract her father? What was mortifying enough to make him turn around and pay attention to her instead of Winn? Blanche thought hard, and of course picked the first thing that came to her head.

“Uh— I’m going on a date with a frat boy and having sex with him in a cave!” she blurted out. Jean, who was normally a very stoic and serious man, turned 40 different shades of red in about .2 seconds and whirled around to face his daughter.

“Excuse me?”

Blanche had her back pressed against the back wall, eyes wide as she tried to read whatever emotion that was on her father’s face. This was going poorly.

“Yup! So much cave sex! Lots of it. And I’m not even on the pill! And he’s probably too stupid to bring condoms! Whatever will we do? Oh yeah! Have sex! In a cave!”

Winn glanced around the hospital room for something that he could use to—well, to open his wound back up. Fuck, this was going to hurt. He looked back to his bedside table. Glass, no. Too loud, Dr. Harlow would notice glass shattering. Paper? No, paper cuts didn’t require trips to the emergency rooms. There was nothing. Except. He looked down at his hands. Fuck. Just then, Blanche started yelling about “cave sex,” causing Dr. Harlow to turn around.

Shit. Okay, now or never. Never let it be said that Winn didn’t do anything for the werewolf community. This was probably extremely gross, but Winn didn’t have time to think about that — his immune system would block anything bad, right? He tore the gauze away from his shoulder carefully, but quickly, clenched his teeth, and jammed his thumb into the closing wound, and yanked up, hoping he could approximate the damage that had been done to him.

Fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuck. He couldn’t stop a small gasp from coming out as he reopened it. Ow. He looked to Blanche’s face as she stared at him past her father, silently mouthing “sorry,” and pushing the gauze back town, taping himself back up as best he could. He wiped his thumb, bloody as it was, on his upper leg, underneath the hospital gown, and blinked away the tears welling up in his eyes.

Wait, did she say date with a frat boy?

“Blanche Louisa Harlow, how dare you disrupt a patient’s—”

“Yeah, Dad, whatever! We’re going to go into the cave and have holy motherfucking hell—” Guess when Winn decided to reopen his wound. “Sex,” Blanche finished, lamely. “Without protection.” Did Winn just fucking do that?

Jean looked fifty shades of angry, and Blanche sort of wanted to go die in a hole. She just said the words ‘cave’ and ‘sex’ consecutively and also implied a strong chance of pregnancy. Great. Awesome. Loved that for her. Anxiety was twisting her insides inside out and now she definitely knew she was going to be sick at some point that day. God, she was going to fucking kill Winn.

“And also, Winn was just saying how he wants to be discharged against medical advice!” Blanche hissed, shooting him a glare.

Jean made a face. “What?” His head turned towards Winn. “What?” he repeated, still confused.

“I—” Winn wanted to kick himself. He could’ve spent that time thinking of a better cover story instead of stabbing himself with his thumb. “Yes, I’m a, uh—” Quick, Winner, think of a religion that refused medical treatment. “Scientologist?” he tried. “Clearly, I wouldn’t have come here if I didn’t have no other choice. Clearly. And while I thank thee”—alright—“Good Doctor, it is time I take my leave of this place, lest my, um, soul not go to the great beyond and join with the Motherland.” Shit, dumbass, he didn’t know anything about Scientology. Other than Tom Cruise. Wait. “Tom Cruise would be very disappointed in me.” … Wait, no.

He smiled weakly at Dr. Harlow. “If I could just get some fresh gauze before I go, I’ll, uh, yep. Be… on my way.”

Was Winn talking about Tom Cruise?! NO! Blanche ran her hands down her face, exasperated as Jean stared at him like he had four heads. “Scientologists usually have cards—” The tiny card in their wallets with their identification. Blanche coughed loudly.

“He’s new at it, really—can’t you just get a nurse to redress his wound and grab the AMA paperwork so we can go?” Ah, so they were a ‘we’ now. Blanche realized the second she said discharge that it meant she was the ride home. That was fine, she just hadn’t been expecting it. Jean, clearly exasperated and angry, looked between the two one more time, before shaking his head. He moved and went to redress the wound himself.

It was painfully quiet for the three minutes it took him to do so. Painfully quiet. Blanche wanted to melt into the floor. “The nurse will be in with the paperwork shortly,” he said flatly. Jean moved towards the door, before turning towards Blanche. “We will discuss this later.”

Blanche was always quick to anger, but her expression turned stony as she stared back at her father, and she sneered. “No, we won’t. Get out,” she snapped. And he did. Letting out a slow breath, she turned towards Winn, waiting a few seconds. “... What the HELL was that?!”

“... I panicked?” Winn said, honestly. “Look, I just forgot that the Jehovah’s Witnesses—fuck, I could’ve said I was a Jehovah’s Witness—existed, or that people refused medical treatment. I’ve never not wanted to get proper treatment!” He tried for a joke, a half-truth. “Glad I didn’t have my wallet on me when I rolled in here, otherwise I think your dad might’a thought we were lyin’ or somethin’. Little cards, who knew?”

He winced as he rolled his shoulder, trying to get his body to get with the program. Damn it, he’d been asleep for most of the healing earlier, but now he’d have to actually deal with it. “But, uh, thanks for the… um, cave sex cover story? Don’t know where you came up with that one, B, but you really saved my bacon.”

The nurse came in, squinting at Winn as he handed him a clipboard and a pen. Great. He was definitely a hospital cautionary tale now. He went to leave as quickly as he had come, though, with only the vague assertion that they could use a wheelchair, being as Winn didn’t have any shoes. Which… fair.

“Can I keep the gown? I, uh… didn’t have a shirt either?” The nurse didn’t look very impressed, but nodded shortly, before shutting the door behind him.

“I knew about the cards!” Blanche hissed, but that was probably only because she had heard her parents bitch about them too many times whenever they were home. Still she stood in the corner as Winn got situated in his wheelchair, wondering how on earth she was not only going to explain how exactly she had come up with her cave sex story—thank you Regan—to Winn, but also how she was going to keep Winn from getting another crossbow bolt into his head.

The nurses would have a cow. Not only had he had major surgery, but he was leaving not long after he officially woke up. Blanche had her tonsils out when she was like 14 and that definitely wasn’t how this was supposed to work. Though, she didn’t imagine she was going to be shoveling excessive amounts of ice cream into Winn’s mouth. If anything, he was going to give her ice cream.

“For the record,” she grumbled when they were finally cut loose. “I’m not having sex in a cave—we’re going on a hike! A regular hike! And I hate you.” She stewed. “Okay, no I don’t, I’m going to kick someone’s ass for you but oh my god, Tom Cruise is going to be disappointed in me?! Winn!”

Winn shrugged, sheepish, and dodged the less-than-salient (or, less favorably, boneheaded) points. “Like I said, though, I don’t know the Hunter who shot me. You’ve got no one’s ass to kick.” It was a bit odd, how easily he fell into the assumption that Blanche knew a.) more than he did about the supernatural, but b.) that he knew far more about protecting himself from Hunters than she did or could.

“So, uh, I know that I just got crossfaded to my immediate detriment yesterday, but, um, d’you wanna get high? Because I feel like both of us need a come down. A vent sesh.” Oh! Speaking of which. “So, wait. This means you didn’t know I was a werewolf? I thought you’d figured it out!” And then he’d told her anyway, and the world hadn’t ended, so, really, he was at fault here. In his defense, it had been a rough week. One that looked like, thankfully, it would end on a high note.

“Oh, trust me, I have a few ideas on whose ass to kick,” Blanche muttered, a certain French hunter coming to mind. Well, two French hunters coming to mind. Except only one of them had admitted to hunting beasts. Of course, it couldn’t be Kaden’s fault, the coincidence would be too strong. She shook her head. “Whatever, I’m just glad you’re okay. Adrien scared the shit out of me, you know.” Blanche looked at him and stared at him. She thought about the week she had. Her nasty panic attack, the whole Alain situation, Kaden’s stupid fucking ghost, and the mistakes she made with Regan and Remmy, and considered.

“No, I actually didn’t know you were a werewolf. How the hell did you think I figured that out!” she said, frowning. “Yes, I’d like to get high,” she confirmed, digging in her pockets for her keys. “Desperately.”

#wickedswriting #para #Blanche #Dirt Off Your Shoulder #medical blood tw #self harm tw

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bubblieywubbliey · 6 years ago

Text

Evan x Fem!Reader (SMUT) - Practice

The reader is Evan’s best friend and grew up with Zoe and Connor as she lives next door to him. Evan is crushing hard on Zoe and you’re struggling with your crush liking the girl you dated (You used to date Zoe and Evan doesn't know, you guys are still friends). The reader isn’t a virgin (You dated Connor as well as Zoe, both of whom you'd had sex with during the course of the relationship.) so she offers to teach him how to kiss and things… escalate. You are also still insecure about your body and have self-harm scars on your thighs. There is a lot of fluff/story setup at the beginning, so I’ll mark where that stops and smut begins!

I wrote this for me personally originally so it’s very specific to me... Feel free to make requests for anything you’d like! I’m really into DEH at the moment so any ship you like, I’m down to write! I’ll write LGBT fics, any smut with kinks, whatever you fancy! There will be a sequel continuing this!

Warning: References to Self Harm, Smut, Swearing

You turn to look at your best friend Evan Hansen. He was rambling to you, Jared and Connor while you ate lunch, about what his therapist told him about managing his anxiety.

“And she said d-don’t worry about your hands getting sweaty, or they’ll be sweaty and even when you try to dry them it will get worse and the way to d-distract yourself is to imagine everyone naked, but then I get really u-uncomfortable because I think everyone’s naked and then I tried it when I was talking to Zoe and I got a b-b-bon- you know a-”

“Evan!” You interrupt him as he starts to spiral out of control. He inhaled and turned to face you.

“Y-yeah?” He flashed a nervous smile at you and you reached out to touch the top of his hand, he jumped but let it stay there. You looked him in the eyes and smiled softly.

“Calm down, okay? I’m sure she didn’t notice, you left straight away right?” You patted his arm before letting go and retracting it, still smiling.

“Y-yes! I, um well I actually r-ran away.” He corrected you, blushing. “She’s just so… so…” You flinched internally as he was lost for words to describe her, how perfect she was. It hurt, you knew it shouldn’t but it did. “I know she says we’re friends but I don’t really know how to talk to her without you guys there and she’s so beautiful…”

“Dude, that’s my sister you’re talking about getting a boner for!” Connor seemed to register what was being discussed and thumped the table. “Seriously dude just ask her out already so I can stop wanting to punch you!” Conner huffed and sunk down in his chair a little more and sulked.

“S-sorry!” Evan stuttered and blushed even more than before. You punched Connor in the arm.

“Listen, Evan, if you really want to ask Zoe out I could come over tonight and give you some pointers?’ You still cringed at the idea of Evan - YOUR Evan asking your other best friend AND ex-girlfriend out. “I could tell you the kind of stuff she likes?”

“R-Really? That would be great Y/N!” the bell rang, Evan grinned and jumped up from his seat, kissing you hurriedly on the cheek and running away excitedly. You froze in your seat as his lips touched your cheek and felt a stirring in the depths of your stomach. At this moment you were truly grateful you weren’t a guy or there may have been some issues downstairs.

“Y/N? Are you okay?” Jared poked you gently in the shoulder to check. “The bell went, we need to go..” you jumped at the contact.

“Yeah.” You sighed and got up and the three of you started walking to your next class.

“You struggling with Evan liking Zoe?” Connor asked, seemingly gentle and understanding for an unprecedented moment.

“W-what? No! I-I could care less about who Evan likes! I don’t care at all, not a bit!” You stuttered and tripped through the sentence, startled by Connor’s perceptive question.

“ I think the lady doth protest too much!” Jared quipped as you threw a nasty glare in his direction as he began to laugh. “Wow, Evan huh? Didn’t see that coming! He’s such a dork, the guy can’t even string a proper sentence together!”

“Jared! Leave me alone! This is bullying!” You shoved him gently and he pushed you back.

“I’m just sayin’ you’re hot! You could have picked pretty much any guy in the school! But you picked the socially awkward guy who has an unachievable crush on his best friend’s ex-girlfriend?”

“Sshh! He’s doesn’t know we dated! And I-I didn’t choose it! I haven’t! I don’t like Evan that way! I’m not even hot, I don’t know what you mean by that.” You struggled to lie to Jared since you knew him so well.

“Sure, Y/N. Sure. That’s why you and Connor used to fuck every night.” Jared chuckled while Connor sniggered behind the pair of you.

“Shut up! I do not have a crush on Evan Hansen!” You yelled, getting strange looks from passers-by. “Dumbasses.”

You arrived at Evan’s house, nervous about what you had planned to say to Evan. You knocked on the door gingerly and watched as Evan’s face appeared behind the now open door.

“Hey! T-thanks for this again. You r-really didn’t have to.” Evan smiled and opened the door, hugging you lightly before allowing you into the house.

“No problem! Anything for you, Evan.” You smiled, sitting down on the couch. “So, how can I help? I could tell you about the kind of romantic moves have worked on her in the past? She dated Aaron Jones last year and he only ever wanted to make out and fuck so she broke up with him so I would do something sensitive that doesn’t have any expectations tied to it?”

“M-make out? I’ve, um I-I-” He stuttered again, you could see him starting to panic.

“Whoa, okay don’t worry about that yet! I was thinking of something slightly subtle. Maybe a double date in the park, there’s less pressure for it to be a date-date?” You suggested gently as Evan began to calm down.

“Y-yeah. That could work, I’ll ask her tomorrow. Could you come? As my double date, uh bring whoever you like? B-but not Aaron James!” His eyes widened at the idea.

“I, um I don’t think that’s a good idea Ev, ask Jared or Connor? I have a lot of work to get done over the next couple of weeks..” You excused yourself and Evan’s face fell.

“I understand, o-of course I’ll ask Jared.”

”Y/N! I did it! I asked Zoe out! She said yes! I’m going with Jared and his mystery boyfriend? Do you know who it is?” You looked up at Evan and smiled.

“Great Evan! I’m so glad you were able to do that... Not sure who his boyfriend is!” You shrugged and Evan smiled back before looking anxious again, you touched his arm and you knew he was still worrying about Aaron James and his adventurous tongue. “Hey, don’t spiral again…”

“I-I haven’t kissed a-anyone b-before! What if I’m b-bad at it? This is a bad idea maybe I should just leave Zoe she’s probably happy being just friends and I’m gonna ruin it and I don't know how kissing works and what if I bite her and then she hates me forever? What then? I just really wish someone could just t-teach me how! How do people know? Oh, w-wait I wasn’t asking YOU to teach me, that would be weird, right? That would be weird, right?” Evan’s breathing continued to get heavier and heavier. You knew he was very much asking now.

“Ev, I’d be happy to teach you, if you really want me to… Then you’d know what to do after the date. She usually kisses after the first date so you’ll be prepared?”

“O-oh I mean t-“ He stuttered in surprise.

“It’s fine! You don’t have to!” You backtracked.

“N-n-no! I would, I’d appreciate that. That would be really helpful. Really, um, really great..” He trailed off, you looked away and so did he.

“Okay then… Is your house okay?”

“Y-Yeah, my mom’s at college tonight.”

“Cool..”

“Cool…” You looked awkwardly at each other.

“It won’t even be like your first kiss because it’s not with someone you’re attracted to! So it’s just practice for the real one.”

“Y-Yeah! Not to say that you a-aren’t attractive you are! And funny and kind! I don’t want you to think that I think you’re ugly or something because… I definitely… D-don’t think that.” He finished awkwardly and you laughed softly and picked up your tray.

“I’ll be over at about 6.” Was your parting message before dropping your tray off and heading to jazz band.

When you arrived at jazz band you spoke sat next to Zoe as she practised on her guitar.

“Hey, Zo! I, I heard you and Evan are going on a date tomorrow..?” Zoe paused and looked up at you.

“Yeah! He finally asked me out, in all honesty, I don’t really think of him that was but he’s my friend and I want to give him a chance, you know? Maybe I can least give him his first kiss! There’s no other girl in the school who he’ll ever build up the courage to kiss, he’ll be waiting until college otherwise!” She smiled at you and your heart ached for Evan. Maybe it was weird, giving him pointers on a girl who was very clearly not interested in him, but you wanted to be closer to him, to be supportive of him. He was sweet and kind and handsome, the likelihood was high that Zoe would grow to care about him in a romantic way. Smiling at Zoe you nodded, wishing her luck on the date.

You brushed your teeth as soon as you got home from band practice after school. Eating a mint and picking out your nicest bra (who knows how far the kissing would go? Maybe you could teach him some other things too…) you put on a skirt with a skirt tucked in, before changing your mind and putting on jeans and a t-shirt, then finally picking a skirt with fishnet tights underneath along with a shirt and jumper. Sighing at the exhausting decision-making process, you headed to Evan’s house.

You arrived at 6 pm on the dot and knocked. He opened the door and hugged you in his awkward way and let you in. You sat down on the sofa in his living room and patted the spot next to you. The smell of aftershave was a little overwhelming and you chuckled to yourself as you noticed an empty packet of mints on the coffee table.

“Come on, I won’t bite.” You beckoned him to sit again and he shuffled over to you, fiddling with the hem of his shirt. He sat gingerly on the edge of the seat and looked at you.

“Okay, this is going to be fine okay? If you want we can watch TV for a bit so you can get comfortable again?”

“T-That would be great!” Evan’s shoulders dropped a little as he realised he wouldn’t have to kiss you just yet. You weren’t sure if it was disappointment or relief.

“Feel like watching Heathers? I found a bootleg online! I know how you feel about those but we did pay to go and watch it twice…”

“U-Um sure,” Evan replied smiling. You switched the TV to show YouTube and entered brought up the video.

30 minutes into the show you decided the anticipation had gone on for far too long and he seemed relaxed enough. “Evan I’m going to kiss you now.” You warned him and his eyes went completely wide. You leaned across and put your hand on the side of his face and pressed your lips to his. He was completely still during the kiss and placed an apprehensive hand on your waist before pulling away.

“Wow… Um, t-thanks! I didn’t know kissing was that… that nice. I, um I-I, wow.” He blinked heavily and turned back to the musical and you sighed before replying and placing your feet on his lap to continue watching.

“Yeah… Just, try to be a little more comfortable? Don’t just accept the kiss, be involved in it! Why don’t we take a little break, huh?” You finished your sentence as he began to stress out again.

“O-Okay.” He mumbled.

About ten minutes later Evan began to look uncomfortable. You realised why pretty quickly, it was the scene in the movie where Veronica sang Dead Girl Walking. The actors were grinding and kissing stage and Veronica was wearing a skirt and a bra while JD was shirtless. You had to admit you were getting a little hot under the collar watching them. Evan gingerly removed your feet from his lap and asked you quietly, eyes flashing from you to the TV in front of him. “C-could we try that again?”

“Of course, if you’re sure?” You asked and he nodded.

You pulled yourself onto his lap and he jumped a little, sitting up a little straighter and you smiled before leaning in and connected your lips to his once again. You took a moment to appreciate the softness of his lips, the warmth coming from them. His hands wave around a little as he tried to figure out what to do with them during the significantly more passionate kiss. You gripped his shirt at the shoulders and pressed yourself closer to him while you made out for a few minutes. He finally places one hand on your waist and another behind your neck, you rubbed your tongue across his bottom lip and he gasped, you took the opportunity to deepen the kiss, both of you breathing more and more heavily as you slid your hands up and down his chest. “Evan..” you moaned out and began to kiss his neck softly.

“Y/N..” He gasped, rubbing your back gently. “Y-Y/N! S-Stop!” He pushed you off him shakily. He crossed his legs. “T-Thanks. That was… helpful.. wow. U-Um I need to go to the toilet.” Evan got up quickly with his back to you and ran towards the staircase.

*smut starts here*

“Evan!” You called out and he turned his head to you. “Come here..” you sighed sympathetically. He kept his back towards you as he moved in your direction, trying his best to hide what was clearly a boner. “It’s okay, you know? It’s natural. You’ve never experienced that kind of intimacy before!”

“I-I didn’t mean to! I just couldn’t control it because the kissing was getting so intense and you’re so pretty plus I don’t really, um, touch… y-you know… that very often so when I got excited h-he got excited too I’m really sorry!” He rambled before trailing off. An idea struck you and you stood up and made him turn towards you. His boner was very evident and you sniggered slightly to yourself.

“It’s okay…” You laughed, blushing at his compliment and kissed him again. He jumped back a little as your thigh brushed against his crotch.

“Y-Y/N..” You reached down between the two of you and began to unbutton his pants. “What are you…” He breathed as you began to palm him. He took a half step backwards but moved no further, allowing your hand to remain in its current location.

“It’s all part of the lesson Ev, only if you’re okay with it though. We can stick to kissing if you’d like, that’s completely okay.” You looked him in the eyes, pausing your ministrations.

“C-Can you teach me, um, how to- you know, do… that stuff? I want to be good for Zoe, i-if we go that far. I’m s-scared I won’t… well last. Connor always talks about it like it’s so easy! And I k-know you have experience in that… area.”

“Of course Ev, if you really want that. We’ll stick to the basics okay? If you wanna know a secret, Connor was terrible at sex, to begin with! He learnt over time and so will you… If you want that. We can stop whenever you want, we’ll go slowly?” He nodded nervously and fiddled with the hem of his shirt. “If you ever want to stop, let me know okay? Just shout…” You looked over at the baseball glove on the mantle, “Shout ‘glove’ okay?” He nodded at you as you kissed him again, still palming him against the outside of his khakis.

“Y/N... Oh my... If you’re not careful I won’t learn... anything today..” He mumbled into the kiss.

“What did you say?” You chuckled, he seemed to be relaxing a little.

“U-um, nothing! W-What did you say because I didn’t say anything at all I think that was yo- oh god! God!” He cried out as you slipped your hands inside his khakis and pulled his dick out. It was… unexpectedly large. You crouched down and licked gently up the side and his legs wobbled, he reached out a hand to grab the arm of the sofa. “H-Holy s-shit…” His eyes closed as you began to blow his 7-inch dick. “Y-Y/N, stop, stop I can’t hold it, glove!” He cried out and you pulled off him with a pop and looked up smiling.

“You okay?” Evan looked away momentarily, all his nerves overcoming him once again. You stood up and hugged him, pulling back you smiled. “Do you want to stop?” He smiled and shook his head.

“N-No I’m enjoying it, I just felt really nervous because I‘ve never h-had you know a b-blowjob and so I feel really awkward, I-I don’t know what to do, like where do I put my hands? Do I m-move or let you do all the work because that seems mean and I d-don’t want you to think I’m using you because you’re my best friend Y/N and I want you to feel valued. M-Maybe we should just stop, I feel like I-I’m taking advantage of you!” He began to spiral again and you stood up to face him.

“We can stop if you want to, but if we do this- well if I teach you how to do this, it’s not using me, not if I enjoy it too okay? It’s okay for you to enjoy it, casual sex is very normal okay?”

“C-casual s... I, um okay, I’m sorry I’m just panicking a little.”

“We can take a break whenever you need okay? We don’t even have to go all the way, alright?” He pulled his boxers back up the little way you had pushed them down and buttoned his trousers.

“A-Alright…” He replied, breathing heavily and you pulled him into a hug. He hugged you back, gripping your shirt tightly. After a few minutes of the hug, his breathing calmed and he let go. “Okay..”

“So, I’m just gonna kiss you now, since you seem completely comfortable with that. Remember to be natural, and it’s fine to enjoy it!” He nodded and placed his hands gingerly on your waist, fiddling with the hem of your shirt now. His eyes flashed from your eyes to your breasts, before looking away guiltily.

You chuckled again and pulled him into a kiss, ever so often straying to his jawline and neck until he became accustomed to that, you sucked roughly on his neck and he moaned out, not able to hold it in. “S-Sorry, I’ll be… shit… Be quieter…” he apologised, and you looked up at him, a little shocked.

“E-Evan… I like it. Really, be as vocal as you like.” You smile at him and he let out a breath.

“Okay, um, okay, we can, um, wecankeepgoingifyoulike.” The words tumbled out of his mouth and you chuckled slightly.

“Pardon?”

“I-I said we could c-continue if you becauseIwasreallyenjoyingthat.”

“Hmm. Okay.” You placed his hands on your waist and kissed him again softly. “You’re so.. god...” You muttered into his neck before hesitating and pulling away, he laughed a little, nose crinkling that way it always did when he found something amusing. You blushed and he smiled at you, thumbs starting to rub your waist.

“So, so what now?”

“Depends, do you feel ready to go any further? We can stop here if you want.” You reminded him.

“No!” He blurted out before one hand flew from your waist to his mouth, eyes wide. He removed his hand and spoke again. “S-Sorry. Do you want to stop? I don’t want to take, y’know advantage or anything.” He gestured towards

“No. Ev, it’s fine, you aren’t taking advantage of me, you’re allowed to enjoy it.” You reassured him, placing his hands back onto your waist and connecting your lips to his again. He whimpered softly when you slid a hand under his shirt to rub his chest. You deepened the kiss, slipping your tongue into his mouth, easily dominating the kiss, he gingerly slid a hand up and down your waist and you began to unbutton your shirt.

“Um, o-okay, wowwe’rereallydoingthiswowokay,” he mumbled to himself and you took one of his hands off your waist and gently held it. You kissed down his neck, the hand that wasn’t holding his was rubbing collarbone under his polo shirt. His other hand is now on your shoulder.

“Hey, you can touch me you know, here.” You let go of him and pulled your arms out of the sleeves and threw your shirt to the ground. He gasped at the sight of you covered breasts.

"Wow." He breathed out, you pulled his hands up to touch them and he groaned a little. "U-um is this good?" He asked quietly, rubbing his thumbs over your clothed nipples.

"Mmh..." You muttered out, he stared at you, your eyes were closed as you enjoyed the sensation. You reached back to undo the bra and he stopped you.

"I-Is it okay if you um, if you leave it on for now? I don't... I don't think I could actually handle that." He glanced away from you, embarrassed.

"No problem Ev, in all honesty, Zoe isn't the biggest fan of that kind of stimulation anyway so there isn't much point learning about that."

"Huh? Did she tell you that?"

You blushed, not wanting to share your past relationship with Zoe with him just yet, fearing some kind of disgust or negative reaction. "Y-Yeah, I guess we share that kind of stuff with each other..." You cringed internally at the mediocre excuse but he seemed to accept it readily.

"O-Okay. So, should I take my shirt off?" He asked, you nodded, his expression became slightly anxious again and so you pulled the shirt over his head, giving him a small smile to reassure him. You kissed him again, running your hands over his chest before pushing him down onto the sofa and straddling his thighs. You glanced over him, slightly lost for words at his beauty. His chest was surprisingly covered with hairs and freckles dusted his shoulders. Stretch marks littered his hips and he noticed you looking at them and he closed his eyes, not wanting to see your reaction.

"Ev, you're so perfect." You leaned forward and mumbled into his ear before kissing his neck softly. He turned slightly red and stuttered out a reply.

"I-I'm really not..." You pulled back, giving him a stern glare. Leaning forward you kissed up and down his jaw to punctuate your next sentence

"You are. Evan Hansen. You are beautiful. You know that right? I mean you're so handsome and sweet, and the kindest person I know. Remember that. Okay?" You both blushed at your outburst and he nodded subtly. You nodded back and kissed his neck slowly, leaving a couple of hickeys while he gasped out, eyes wide at the sensation. His hands ran up and down your back as he moaned out your name.

"Y/N... God that feels so good." You smiled into his neck, realising he was becoming more comfortable around you. He pulled your face back up gently to kiss him again and he then began to kiss down your neck, your head lolled back in pleasure as he slid his hands just under the hem of your skirt, rubbing your thighs through the holes in your fishnets.

"E-Evan!" You gasped out as he found your sweet spot, sucking it gently, you ground down onto his hips and he gasped into your neck, his forehead pressed against your chin as he groaned softly. “Jesus… I thought you’d never done this before?” You asked in disbelief as he slid a hand up to the hemline of your tights, even closer to where you needed him almost desperately.

“Is this okay?” He whispered into your neck as he hooked his fingers into the waistband. You exhaled a soft reply.

“Oh my god, yes.” He pulled your tights down at the top, you could feel his hands shaking while he did it, he continued to kiss your neck as he pulled your tights further down. “Evan…” you gasped out again and your breathing intensified. “Holy shit you haven’t even touched me yet.” You mumbled to yourself.

“Huh?” he paused, not hearing your comment.

“N-Nothing… Can we hurry up a little?” Evan nodded at you, eyes wide with excitement.

“Please, I’m um, I’m feeling much more, more comfortable. You, youmakemefeelreallysafe.”

“I’m glad you feel comfortable with me Ev, I feel safe with you too.” You replied, letting him take off your tights, following them with your skirt. Now just in your shirt, you kissed his neck again and unbuttoned his jeans. He inhaled suddenly as your hand brushed against his bulge. You stood up, now clad in only your bra and panties. He stood up too and kicked his khakis off his feet before you pulled him back into an embrace, kissing his neck again and running your hands up and down his arms and back before reaching down to hold his butt. He gulped as you reached into the waistband of his boxers, pulling them down over his ass. The rush of cold air took him by surprise and grabbed your hands, stopping you.

“Are you okay Evan?” He shrugged and replied to you.

“I’m worried… That I won’t be good enough for you, that you won’t enjoy it, or that I’ll… C-cum too early, I don’t exactly have any practice with, holding out- for very long. Is there a… a way to get you closer first? I… I want you t-to get something out of this too.” Your best friend looked away nervously, one of his common ticks that shone through when he began to let his anxiety take control.

“Of course, I mean I know it’s what Zoe tends to enjoy more than penetration- so, so she’s told me. That's the kind of stuff us girls talk about... Yep...” you trailed off once again. Evan nodded, blushing a little before apprehensively kissing you again. This time it was softly, pulling away he grinned at you, his nose crinkling up again. He kissed you again, slowly pressing soft kisses to your lips and around your jaw.

“Is, is this okay?" He muttered as he reached around to unclip your bra. His fingers ghosting over the strap, waiting for a reply.

"Y-yes fuck, just do it. I don't wanna keep waiting." Your whole body was tingling with excitement as he attempted to unclip your bra, he managed the task with little to no trouble and you took your arms out of the straps, looking up at him and smiling. You felt relief rush over you at having the layer removed, before a sense of nervousness spread through your chest, your heart beating faster as Evan glanced towards your chest and back to your face, attempting to gauge his reaction. Even though you were experienced, you were still insecure.

"Is it okay? I know they're not that big and Zoe's are nicer but-"

"N-No!" Evan interrupted you, eyes wide. "Um, they're- you. You're beautiful. But specifically... they... are beautiful. Really." He fumbled awkwardly with your fingers and tried to be reassuring. You weren't sure if you believed him but you nodded anyway. His fingers, which were previously resting on your hips, had travelled up to rest on the sides of your ribcage, where he apprehensively looked at your breasts. You pushed him down onto the bed and straddled him once again, feeling his hardness pressing against the inside of your thigh. Your mind raced as you ground down on him gently. He looked down at your waist briefly and you pulled his gaze back to you, directing him away from your scars. You kissed him, being slightly rougher as you grew impatient, wanting to just fuck him already. He closed his eyes, whimpering at the friction you provided.

"S-Shit..." he mumbled and you held back a chuckle, not wanting to make him uncomfortable. You took his hands from your waist, sitting up straight so they were opposite him and placed them onto your breasts and his eyes flew open. "Jesus!" He gasped out, attempting to move his hands away but you held them there.

"Ev, you don't have to just stare, you can touch. If you want to, no one’s forcing you.” You explained to you and he gently squeezed them and your eyes half-closed and he rubbed his fingers over the buds of them and stared at them in awe. Suddenly he leaned forward and took one nipple into his open mouth, rolling his tongue across the tip. You moaned out softly and he looked up at you, seemingly nervous about your response to his actions.

“Is that, um, good?” He asked, releasing you.

“God Evan don’t stop...” You panted out, head lolling back. He placed his mouth back on your chest and rubbed the other side gently, he anxiously wiggles his tongue against your flesh, watching you as you moaned out softly. He let go suddenly and you looked down at him.

“Okay, you’re a natural! That was, that was... really good Ev.” You were breathing heavily and he scoffed lightly, holding back a smile. “Can we… head up to your room? It’s a little weird doing it down here with all the pictures of your mum…”

“Y-Yeah, of course, I get that, totally, definitely we can go upstairs. To the room… That I sleep in, to my bedroom.” Evan rambled once again and blushed gently. You took him by the hand and led him.

You stood up and grabbed your clothes, then the pair of you walked into his bedroom hand in hand, you climbed under the covers and he copied you. Kissing you again, he rubbed tiny circles on the small of your back. You reached underneath the covers and attempted to remove his boxers and he pushed them away.

“Um, How do I say this? I want to, um, you know we talked about teaching me to um- you know what it’s fine whatever you want to do is completely fine with me!”

“Evan, it’s about you learning, so yes it’s about mutual pleasure but there’s no point to this if you don’t tell me what you want too, okay?” He nodded silently and you gave him a stern look.

“Um, I mean, can you teach me how to… howtofingeryou?”

“Oh, sure…” A million thoughts raced through your head on how to hide these scars from him. Evan pulled the duvet back and got distracted once again by your breasts. You smiled at his vague innocence and chuckled slightly. Evan inhaled deeply and looked back up at you. He kissed you again, before migrating down to your breasts, licking and sucking gently while you gasped out, he couldn’t help but continue, almost addicted to the sound of your whimpers and moans. “Jesus Evan, that feels so-uh! So fucking good…”

Before you knew it Evan had, with a burst of confidence brought on by your praise, pulled your panties off and kissed you, this time it was more passionate, he stopped observing your body with awe. Before you knew it Evan was kissing your stomach on his way to your thighs.

“Wait, Evan-” You tried to stop him, but it was too late, his head was between your thighs and he was frozen on the spot.

“Y/N…” He gasped out, you could hear the pity in his voice and you hated it.

“Evan, don’t please, I didn’t want you to see… They’re old scars, I don’t feel that way anymore, not much, never that badly.” You tried to pull your knees up to your chest, to cover your scars but Evan held your legs there, at first you flinched as he kissed each one of your scars gently, then you relaxed in his grip and he made no further comments on the subject. You couldn’t have asked for more from this boy, you really were fucked. Doing this with him was a bad idea, it meant much more to you than to him, no matter how much you lied to yourself, but fuck, if you weren’t going to do it anyway.

“Evan, that’s the sweetest thing anyone’s ever done for me.”

“I’m your best friend, it’s my job to care about you!” He protested and looked away, struggling to take the compliment. “Okay, can you tell me what to do? I’m, I guess I’m just not really sure what to do now…”

“Well that’s why we’re here isn’t it?”

“...Si..Senorita! Um, sorry. I got nervous again.” Evan blushed and looked up at you from between your legs.

“Okay um, so, god I’ve never really explained this before, just, rub around the outside a little bit? I’m pretty… well, I’m pretty wet already, so you can probably slide one finger in straight away..?” You stuttered while you tried to explain what to do. Zoe wasn’t a virgin when you dated and Connor never asked any questions, you assumed he had learnt from porn?

“Okay…” You looked down just as Evan touched your entrance with a finger apprehensively and you whimpered under your breath, internally begging him to speed up, although he didn’t mean to he was teasing you mercilessly and you could hardly bear the tension. He rubbed his forefinger against you gently and you couldn’t help but moan out. He drew his hand away sharply and looked up at you.

“Is everything okay?”

“Jesus Evan, it’s fine, just… felt really good. Don’t stop now okay?” You told him and he nodded, returning to his ministrations. “H-Holy shit…” You muttered under your breath as he slid a finger gently inside of you.

“Is this okay?” He paused.

“God, keep going Evan.” You gasped out, clutching softly at the sheets with one hand. He pumped his middle finger in and out of you gently, easing it through every time, he treated you as though you were made of glass. This was very different from sex with Connor or Zoe, which was quick and rough and mind blowing. He was so cautious, gentle, he focused on your pleasure. Not to say you didn’t get off with Connor or Zoe respectively, you always did, but this was in a very different way. You felt extra pressure suddenly, realising that Evan had slid his forefinger in alongside the middle one, you barely held back your gasp. Having easily slid in the second, Evan entered you with a third, his ring finger. You moaned out and panted gently, feeling him stretch you slightly with his fingers.

“I-If you, oh god, okay- If you want you can- uh- you can use your mouth too, only if your com-comfortable though- Jesus, Evan!” You managed to stutter out as he thrust his fingers into you.

“Okay, I’ll try it?” Evan replied, nervous, he wasn’t sure if he would be any good at that, and you seemed to be enjoying what he was already doing and what if he didn’t like the taste? No. This was about learning, trying new things, now was no time to let his anxiety get the best of him. He leaned in and licked the tiny nub above your entrance. You cried out, your legs flailing slightly. Evan jumped in surprise. You must be sensitive there, he started treating the tiny nub like he did your breasts, giving it tiny licks and sucking on it with gusto.

He decided he liked the taste.

You reached down and tangled your fingers in his hair and he groaned out, directly onto your clit and began to thrust his fingers into you even faster, you gripping onto his hair for dear life.

“Holy, Holy shit! Okay, okay you need to st-stop…” You pushed his head away gently and Evan looked up at you, pouting subtly.

“But you didn’t finish?” He asked, confused.

“I don’t want to cum yet, then what happens to you?” You replied, breathless.

“Well, I guess, nothing? I want you to, well I want you to cum and I don’t think I’m gonna last very long, no siree.” He rambled and you pulled him up so he was half-straddling you.

“I’m nearly there, I’ll direct you okay? Do you have any condoms up here?” You asked. “I’m on the pill but you know, for safety?” Evan nodded nervously.

“Mom keeps some in the bathroom, ‘just in case I ever bring a girl over’.” He chuckled at the idea before giving you a quick kiss and getting off you to go to the bathroom. You lay there silently shocked, that kiss wasn’t just practice. That was him, kissing you, not as part of making out, just a kiss. He walked back into the room and you snapped out of your daze and leaned up on your elbows.

“Okay, do you know how to put a condom on?” Evan nodded, pinching the tip and rolling it over himself after removing his boxers. He climbed onto the bed and straddled you again. You lay in the missionary position at the end of the bed so he could reach you easily and Evan aligned his cock with your entrance.

“Are you ready?” He asked, nervous about hurting you. He had heard that sex could be painful when the guy was on the bigger side and from what he had concluded, he was.

“Mmh hmm. Just take your time okay? Don’t be afraid to cum first, you can always finish me off afterwards.” You reminded him and he nodded. You felt a large pressure at your entrance and then a stretching sensation.

“Shit, oh my god, shit, oh my GOD!” Evan cried out, he finally filled you all the way, he length was certainly impressive, a little larger than Connor’s, you’d never had anything of that size inside you so you managed to gasp out a request.

“C-Can you just wait a second?” Your question came out as more of a whimper as the burning sensation that came with the stretching began to fade as your body adjusted.

“Um, shit, okay yeah,” Evan replied, leaning over you slightly and gasping. He tried to steady his breathing a little, calming down.

“Okay, you can move, just, slowly? I know it’s hard but- it’s cliche but I’ve quite literally never had anything this big inside me…” You trailed off and Evan tried to suppress a smile at the idea of being bigger than anything you’d ever had. He ever so gently pulled back, only halfway before pushing back all the way in. You inhaled sharply, a shockwave of pleasure running through you as he hit something deep inside of you. He pulled back again, this time too far and his dick slid out of you completely.

“Shit. Sorry.” He muttered, pushing back into you, filling the emptiness that overtook you so suddenly, your back arched as his pelvic bone brushed against your clit and you moaned. He repeated the thrusting at the same angle and you gasped again. He consistently thrust in and out of you at the same angle, his eyes closed tight shut as he held on to his orgasm as long as he possibly could. You reached down and grabbed his hips, stopping him.

“Evan, the first lesson of sex, don’t stick with the same position, it can get boring... Try other angles too, you can even be a little rough with your thrusts if you like, just let loose a little, it doesn’t have to be so structured, yeah?”

“O-Okay. I can do that, let go, just let go. That’s not hard. Here we go, okay.” He mumbled to himself. He began thrusting again, his thrusts began becoming a little more erratic and you could tell he was nearing his orgasm, he was going to cum before you and he would never forgive himself. You reached down and began to rub your clit, the knot getting tighter and tighter in your stomach. Evan began thrusting harder, you gasped as he hit a new place inside of you, arching your back and moaning his name breathlessly. Suddenly he pulled out and essentially rolled you over onto your front, so he could access you from behind. He wrapped his hands around your waist and thrust again. At this point, it was less of thrusting and more of a merciless pounding as he chased both his and your orgasm.

“Thank you, thank you, thank you so much..” He panted over and over again as he neared his orgasm, shifting your position one more time back to missionary, he latched onto one of your nipples while you continued to rub your clit. Pumping in and out of you he moaned out, whimpering and making what you could only describe as a kind of desperate sobbing as he attempted to hold out for you. He began pounding you even harder, the bed shaking as he filled out, gasping, you felt even more pleasure was over you and he pulled away from your chest to look at your face as you tightened around him, your orgasm finally washing over you. His thrusts became stronger and you felt the collision of your pelvic bones, you knew that would leave a bruise.

“Y/n…”

“Ev…” you gasped out as your body spasmed around him but he continued thrusting, giving you no chance to recover and edging you towards your second orgasm.

“Y/N! Oh my god ohmygod ohmygod I can’t hold it.”

“L-let go, Evan!” You cried out, your second orgasm hitting you as he jackhammered in and out of you, gasping your name alongside a string of ‘thank you’s.

“Evan!”

“Thank you, I love you!” Evan let out the garbled sentence and you both collapsed on the bed, spent. In that moment where he pulled out of you, you registered what he’d said.

“You what?” You panted out. Turning to face him.

“I-I just meant that you’re my best friend and I, um I love you.”

“Oh okay, because I, um I love you too, you dork.” You replied. Well if this wasn’t the weirdest thing you’d ever done. You had just had sex with your best friend who you’re in love with, so that he could practice having sex for a date with your ex-girlfriend and other best friend. And then you said you loved each other. What a fucking mess.

Evan didn’t reply, he only turned took the condom off and flopped back down onto the bed to face the ceiling. Out of the corner of your eye you see him move his arm towards your hand, before stopping halfway, changing his mind. You closed the gap and interlocked your fingers with him. After a while he broke the silence.

“So who else knows?” He asked quietly. You turned your head towards him.

“Knows what?” He gestured towards your exposed scars. You sat up and pulled the duvet over the both of you, insecurities flooding you once again.

“One minute. I need to go and pee.” You didn’t answer his question and instead pulled on a t-shirt that was draped over his desk chair. You ran into the bathroom, breathing heavily, you sat on the toilet and peed before sitting down on the floor next to the sink. A few minutes later you heard a knock on the door, just as the tears began to fall.

“Y/N? Can I come in?” You heard the nervous tapping of his foot and figured he was getting really anxious about you.

“Y-Yes…” You replied quietly, . Evan opened the door, clad only in his boxers and saw you on the floor. He dropped to his knees and hugged you.

“I-I’m sorry, I should never have asked you to do this, you regret it now, god I’m really sorry, that was really selfish an-”

‘-Evan!” You interrupted him. “I don’t regret it, I could never regret it, you, I mean. The only people who know are Connor and Zoe, I was having a pretty rough time a couple of years back, me and Zoe had just broken up, Connor wasn’t talking to me so neither was Jared… It was a bad time for me.”

“Wait broken up? You Zoe dated?” Evan’s jaw dropped, everything made sense now. This was all kind of fucked up wasn’t it?

“Yeah… I guess this is me coming out. I’m bisexual… I, um I totally get it if that’s weird for you or something, I didn’t really want you to know.” You finished and looked away. He leaned across and kissed you, a million thoughts racing through his mind, what if you rejected him? What would he say to Zoe? How had he been so obsessed with her for so long with you around? What did this mean to you, if anything? You interrupt his train of thought by wrapping your hands around his neck, kissing him back softly.

“That doesn’t change a thing… I don’t know what’s happened tonight but, I like you, a lot, hell, I love you. I’m sorry! I shouldn’t have said that it’s too much pressure, you don’t have to say anything obviouslyididn’twann-”

“Oh my god Evan, stop, I love you too. I mean it. You. If you’ll have me, I’d like to be your girlfriend? Or, we don’t have to classify it yet. We can just be, together.”

“No, I- I want to be your boyfriend, I want you to be my girlfriend. If you want to be?”

“Of course I want to be! That’s what I just said to you, dummy!” You retorted, kissing him again. “I guess you won’t need to practice for Zoe anymore then?” You snigger.

“I figured I could, we could practice, for us.” He mumbled.

“I like that idea.” You smiled at him and stood up, pulling him off the ground too. You held his hand and as you were walking down the corridor you heard a shout.

“Evan? Sweetie! I’m home!”

“Shit!” Evan muttered and you both ran to the bedroom, you threw on your skirt and put your bra and shirt back on while Evan pulled his khakis and polo shirt back on. “Okay Mom! I’ll be down in a minute, I’m, um, just finishing up studying!”

“Evan! I can’t find my underwear. I think I left it downstairs!” You whisper shouted to him.

“Fuck, okay, my Mom knows you’re here tonight anyway so just go downstairs and try to look in the living room for them.”

——-//———

So please let me know if you liked this and if you want me to write more!! :)

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