#Alvar Vacker

[alvarvacker-ceo]

oh my fucking god. (UNRAVELED SPOILERS)

[the-way-astray]

sophie describing della, alden, fitz, and biana: they're so hot that i can barely look away. their beauty is like a force drawing me toward them. they all have insanely good looks. is it even legal to be that good-looking? how is this even possible. i could never be as hot as them. they are literally visually perfect. fitz and biana literally look like a combination of their parents' best features in the best possible way. their gorgeousness blows my mind

sophie describing alvar: yeah, he's good-looking i guess, but not as hot as the rest of them. it's okay, though, because he works out and gels his hair

cracking up forever and always at the way sophie always describes alvar as "hot, but not as hot as fitz and biana"

[alvar-not-vacker]

if this gets 1k notes before the new year, i'll compliment fitz

[frizzle-mcshizzle]

i have the God given gift of creativity and access to procreate

and im making it everyones problem

[queefsencen]

breaking my silence i want alvar vacker so bad

[kriskrossapplesauce05]

They ended up going

[the-great-gullon-incident]

Alvar had his spotlight stolen away

Fitz could never leave the spotlight

Biana was never in the spotlight

[castleofravens]

jolie died 16 years before book 1, when she was 20 (so she'd be 36). as of stellarlune, she'd be around 38. she's 10 years older than alvar, and their parents were friends, which leads to the very distinct possibility that she babysat for the vackers (or at least, alvar and maybe fitz as a baby?)

[doodle-do-wop]

The Vacker Siblings

my (late) contribution to the Vacker weekend

Zoom ins under cut!!

[everliving-everblaze]

a vacker brown eyes edit for the people, but especially for the crushers

[chronically-ill-psionipath]

YIPPEE! VACKER WEEKEND 🥺🎉🎉💖💖

@vackerweekend

[kale-of-the-forbidden-cities]

it would be fucked up if Fintan or Brant used Alvar's Vacker crest to heat it up and burn him so he has a Vacker shaped burn scar somewhere

[the-way-astray]

how many people am i gonna piss off with my kotlc villain opinions

morally gray: bronte, oralie

sympathetic villain: fintan, brant, ruy

anti-hero: mr. fucking forkle who i hate

anti-villain: gethen (to me, once shannon does something with him i will have more to say), vespera, gisela

just plain annoying: FUCKING ALVAR

[sophiejacksonchase]

Della: My children's diet is entirely organic.

Grady: that's cool. When Sophie eats, which happens almost never, she eats candy only.

[frizzle-mcshizzle]

everyone look my abomination, his name is Larvar

[an-j8]

If there is no such thing as cheating in the elf world, why does Alvar claim to have 3 girlfriends in book 1?