#All because I did an OC questionnaire ages ago where I had them both answer the questions together and they riffed with each other

[meximango]

Day 10 - Stable - Apogee - G

Summary: A prototype is made. Dawntrail Spoilers!!

I’m toying with the idea of making Apogee an Endless similar to Otis, except the experiment didn’t work. Apogee is still in a mechanical body housing their original soul, but the memory transference got corrupted.

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“Miss–” “-s she–”

“-s it wo–k” “--u awake yet?” It takes a while for them to understand that the words are being directed toward them, and even longer to parse their meaning. Once the people in the room have determined they are conscious enough, the questions repeat rapid-fire: do you remember what you signed up for? How do you feel? What do you recall, before going under? Can you tell us what year it is, your nameday, and your full name? What is your profession?” One by one, the questions get answered, though they are still quite groggy and go about it pretty slowly. There must be a trick to it. By the serious and increasingly worried expressions on their faces, they get the feeling they’re failing a test. They’re bad at this, somehow. The answers aren’t what these people expected, and now they’re disappointed. Only just awoken and already letting people down. Somehow, it makes them want to play this off as a joke, to be casual and pretend it was all part of their plan. 

Surprise! Those were just fake answers to throw you for a loop! Everything is fine, see? Look at my smile. Oh, I don’t have a face like yours? Well, just trust me, then. I’m fine. Vitals are stable. Now can I go?One by one, the scientists run different tests and experiments to try to jog their memory, but it’s met with critically low success. Unfortunately, the name Ada Anurana means nothing to them. They don’t know anything about this Endless project, or their own time as a scientist. They don’t remember their family, their age, or their hobbies. Even Alexandria is a mystery to them. Their homeland! The war! Electrope? Never heard of it. A few scant pieces remain, for which they thank their lucky stars. They understand speech, can read and write, performing magic is second nature to them (though this body has limited aether channels, so even that is something they can’t do right ‘anymore’). They have a decent understanding of  machinery and building things–apparently they used to be an engineer–though they do not understand the math behind how parts fit together, and they can’t draw a blueprint. And that’s it. All that they are. Not all they will ever be, but all that remains, for now. A few other Endless end up getting created, and those work out, not a hitch in sight. Memories and personalities intact. There’s much cheering and celebration. There’s hope yet for their people to be remembered! They only feel bitterness at how things worked out for themself. 

With a shake of their heads, the scientists give up trying to figure out and explain what must have gone wrong with the memory transferral in this case. They even try a few more times to transfer the memories, but the results are always the same. It’s too late to relocate the soul without destroying or sending it straight to the lifestream, and the original body is dead, so there are no more second chances. Something got corrupted, the soul intact but the mind scrambled. 

After the continual disappointment, they don’t really feel like learning about Ada. It would just make everyone’s lives more difficult, trying to memorize facts and pretend. The scientists slowly stop offering details unless prodded. They do not ask. 

It’s strange and confusing and frightening, but mostly they feel frustrated. They hate being seen as a failure. They didn’t even do anything! They’re not given a chance to prove themself worthy of being celebrated, because they can’t fit into what’s wanted and expected. From their perspective, it was as though they were just born! They have to learn about this world and people bit by bit from scratch, like a child. And there is just so little time for that, with the war going on. Perhaps things would be different if the situation were not so dire. As it stands now, they are nothing but a failed project that can’t offer anything. These people knew Ada, and now all they get is– is–they need to start referring to themselves as something, but it doesn’t feel right to take the name of the soul residing in their body, when no memories remain. And as time goes by, it seems it will stay that way. The scientists mourn the person who will never return, it seems, and cast aside and give up on what remains. They are left to their own devices, to do as they please. They are given a file about Ada and told they can help with the Endless project or with taking care of the injured, or fighting the enemy, or anything else they desire. 

They have so little desire, other than to find a way to refer to themself–and above all, to prove their worth, that they belong and deserve to be their own person. They hope to cultivate more desires along the way. They may not be Ada, but they can use this soul to start a new life, even in these tumultuous times. Maybe they’ll learn how to build with electrope and invent something to help with the war efforts to keep their city of Alexandria safe. Ada’s file contains a lot of notes, research, personal diary, everything from her life condensed into a single thick tome. They’ll try to keep it safe, to at least remind themself that Ada existed. Everything referring to the plan to become an Endless had been filed away under a project name: Apogee. From their understanding, Ada had a hobby interest in the sky and celestial bodies, before the shroud of lightning covered everything. Looking up the meaning of the word, Apogee found it did not only refer to when the moon was as far away from them on the ground as possible, but could als be a way to describe someone’s greatest achievement: a climax or culmination. Of Ada’s life work, in this case. What a legacy…

In this one small way, they could honor Ada, while also choosing a name for themself. They like the potential in it: to become the greatest they can possibly be. It’s a worthy goal. Rather than be daunted by how they can’t possibly live up to it, they choose to put on an air of bravado and march forward steadfastly. They’ll prove themself, no matter how long it takes! Once Ada, then nothing, now Apogee. The new name feels right. Wanting to feel useful, Apogee gets to work studying and reaching out to help. They may not know exactly what they all want to do, and they have so much to learn–but whatever they decide, Apogee is going to be the best at it, and there’s no better time to start than today. 

[fcrensis]

THEMES & PREFERENCES QUESTIONNAIRE !!

aka, things i’ve always wanted to ask people / have people ask me. please remember to repost rather than reblog!  happy munday ~ !!

what types of genres do you gravitate towards ?

in general ?? horror, for sure, in any sort of media ; though my tension in writing could use some ( a hell of a lot of ) work, writing horror characters is so much FUN. i actually came to the d:bh fandom from dead by daylight, where i wrote one of the killers, “ the wraith ”. i legitimately miss writing him because he was ?? SO FUN WOW i got to portray this horrifying, monstrous being, manipulated to kill over and over and over again and all the turmoil that came with becoming a predator. my best friend also had this cool horror storyline that i made a character for. his name was gilad, and he was a youth pastor, also indoctrinated into a nasty cult with demonic beliefs and child sacrifices and fucking hell we really need to write that some day.

what types of genres do you gravitate away from ?  

uh anything historical, usually, even fantasy history like game of thrones. it just doesn’t really interest me. saying that, fantasy just plain doesn’t interest me most of the time honestly, one of my favourite books is fantasy but nothing else of it has ever really been my thing !! i’m also USUALLY not a huge fan of anything that’s too much like real life. real life plots and au’s can be fun sometimes but not all the time ; i love a good fuckin barista thread now and again but i couldn’t write it for everything.

what types of characters do you most often play / enjoy ?   

GOSH ,, my character type changes pretty often. a couple years ago i was writing a lot of heroes ( like steve rogers and peter parker, i wrote a lot of marvel characters ) but when i dipped into the DC fandom, i picked up jason todd, who is absolutely an anti-hero. and that was sort of a stepping stone for me writing the more villainous and angry, troubled characters which is sort of still where i’m at ?? so melissa and connor are SUPER challenging for me right now and it’s a lot of fun trying to balance my need to make them fucking assholes and my common sense telling me not to do that.

what types of characters do you seldom play ?    

children, i guess. i have a couple of oc’s under the age of 18 who i have barely used, and before the dead by daylight fandom i was writing ernest vega in dream daddy, but generally i’m sort of weird about writing teenagers and children because i am ,, 20 years old, i don’t know what the fuck kids are like now. i also have never in my life written a maternal character. melissa’s sort of there, but it’s these brief mentions and references and not a defining trait.

any pairing tropes you particularly enjoy ? ( e.g. opposites attract / anguished declaration of love / etc )    

UH yeah, polar opposites ??? listen, in real life, i don’t think anybody who was totally different to me personality-wise would be a good fit, but in writing ? fuck yeah. give me the rough, moody character falling madly in love with the soft one. give me two characters who should be enemies coming to the horrifying realisation that they’re developing feelings for one another. i’m all fucking for it.

any platonic tropes you particularly enjoy ?    

found family is so important to me and i would DIE for hank & connor. i’ve had a lot of found family plots with friends and i am so emotional about every single one of them, be it a sibling relationship or parental.

any antagonistic tropes you particularly enjoy ?    

listen . . . i don’t know what an antagonistic trope is so i’m going to guess and you’re gonna all pretend i’m totally right.

i guess i’m pretty into characters being manipulated and finding out they’re being manipulated, trying to come to terms with that and address what’s happening and what they’ve done and being angry at the injustice.

what are your preferred thread types ? ( novela / para / banter / etc ? )    

oh man, it really depends on my muse. i struggle to write things that are super short, so i do like at least one good sized paragraph, but i prefer to have different lengths of threads !! like, sometimes, i really want to write something long, something more around the 700-1000 word length, but i don’t want that for EVERY thread. shorter things are amazing. they’re a good respite when i don’t feel like dedicating that much energy to something. 300 words is around my usual minimum but i can go shorter !! <3

what are your favorite types of interactions ? ( fluff / angst / smut / etc ? )   

i love both fluff AND angst. what i want at the time really depends on how i’m feeling, though !! like a few days ago i was super into angst and right now i just don’t really have the muse so my angst threads are on temp hold ( except for this one i’ve owed for a week lmao ) while i focus on less violent stuff. i love my characters loving and being loved, but at the same time sometimes i just want them to suffer in some sort of way.

i don’t like smut, though. i can’t write it. i honestly don’t know why, i’ve always been really awkward about it and i feel like, you know, you can’t moderate who reads it if you post it publicly and if i DID write smut, i wouldn’t want underage people getting at it.

what’s on your wishlist ?  what sorts of threads / plots / relationships are you craving right now ?    

me : give a serious answer me to me : literally anything w gavin give me BIG BRO GABIN

i don’t have anything super specific in mind except i ,, did a few days ago want to do an angst thread with connor where something happens ( i.e. hank dies ) and he just decides that he’s done, pulls out his thirium pump and unfortunately has it put back in before shutdown. so i would be open to discussing that w somebody for in a couple days when i inevitably wanna do angst again.

for melissa i !! really just want her to open up to somebody. tell them what happened to her and why she can’t let androids in her space. i also really want an android to TRY to get in her space. befriend her, androids. please.

i also wanna write the fuckin wraith again so if anybody wants to interact w an unwilling executioner trying to hold onto the last of his humanity hit me the fuck up

tagged by . . . @isolationtender a BABE an ANGEL melissa’s fuckign gorlfriend

tagging . . . okay none of you actually have to do this totally feel free to ignore but @detidgaf @lostxdetective @hcpesalive @ethereal-myth  ( hi guys it’s deviiancies )