#Admittedly these are just some of my more recent pieces but yknow
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toasted-buguette · 10 months ago
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it's a tie between this drawing of Tatyana killing Ivan I made to get used to csp
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or Damara's updated design
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Artists, share your favorite drawing of your OC (that you made)
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whoishotteranimepolls · 4 months ago
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hello, finn here, resident one piece "insane tag" writer.... im doing my duty to defend mr. smoker. smo-yan, if you will.
what are my credentials in commenting on this matter? Well. Glad you asked. I've been a onep fan for admittedly not that long, but in that time (like... 8-9 months?) i've messaged one of my close friends. hm. discord receipts.
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681 times about him. also you know that one post? yeah from "smoker. smo-yan." to "i fucking love him good god" that's all me. glad we've established my expertise here
2. look at him. first of all, im raising my eyebrow at you anon because woahhhh looking 60 is fine for me. just perfect, actually. they grey/white hair is fucking wonderful to me personally considering i also love rayleigh and beckman.... also just like. every other part of him. he has huge boobs that he refuses to cover because he's allergic to shirts for some reason. he has leather gloves (would suck on any day). when also jacketless, he wears his jitte with a thick strap over his chest that is So droolworthy. he has a Fat Ass. search up stampede smoker because that's like his peak look. his face scar is endlessly sexy. the slicked back hair (more recently) and the more messy spiky look from earlier in the series both serve in contributing to his bad boy persona, which leads me to my second point: the dichotomy of personality.
3a. part a - the bad boy delinquent persona. if you only take him for his surface level actions and words, he seems a little bit mean. like every gruff, rough-around-the-edges mad dog delinquent type. just look at him as a marine cadet, head shaved and frowning. look at the illustration oda did of him as a kid, holding a nail-imbedded bat. he's loud and brash and commands a whole marine squad, he's big and always has a frown on his face and he's arguing and cursing and you just expect him to be unkind. but. But.
3b. But he's not. he's not unkind at all. He's not nice, maybe, but he's so kind. when tashigi has her crisis about justice vs the marines vs "doing the right thing" are often, actually, at odds with each other, smoker supports her in his own gruff way. tells her he'll be there to support her. and. the scene of all time;
4. la pièce de résistance - his character introduction. oda does character introduction SO well in general (see: mihawk, zoro, galley-la shipwrights, countless others) but the smoker intro is my top intro of all time, it's SO good. to recount to those who don't know, we basically see this big scary gruff guy - shirtless, obviously strong, all spiky hair and big stompy boots - and a kid bumps into him and spills their ice cream all over him. He obviously has a reputation as a powerful guy, because the villiagers around all beg him for forgiveness, ask him not to hurt the kid - and yknow what he does? He says to the kid "looks like my pants ate your ice cream," drops a few coin into their hand, and tells them to buy more scoops next time. that's the most attractive thing i've ever seen. he does masculinity like NO other. gods.
5. strong moral compass - doesn't often agree with general marine guidelines. he's pretty shit at being a marine, honestly. tells the brass to go fuck themselves often. follows his own sense of justice, and even though he hates pirates.... temporarily allying himself with them is not off the table, not if it means more justice (in his eyes). he doesn't like innocent people being killed. in stampede, even as everyone attempts to leave the island in light for abuster call, he stays because there must be something he can do. hina sighs and calls him stupid for it, but takes tashigi koby and helmeppo away anyways, showing that this has happened before, likely multiple times.
6. can he stub those cigars out on me. please. please. plea- [comically large piano falls on me, cutting off my speech]
For context, they are responding to this post about Smoker
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It's always the last paragraph that pushes it into horny jail territory every time
And he does have one of the best intros. I hope they keep it in the live action
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oodlyenough · 11 months ago
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fic 20 questions
1. how many works do you have on Ao3? 127...! I have had the account since 2009, lol.
2. what's your total Ao3 word count? 707,519
3. what fandoms do you write for? Generally I only write for one at a time, which is currently Ace Attorney. Not counting the odd one-offs for ask memes over the years, the other big ones were Arcane, Borderlands, Doctor Who and the wizard books.
4. what are your top five fics by kudos?
Commutative Law (Arcane)
Window of Opportunity (Arcane)
Where the Air is Rarefied (HP)
Prestidigitation (Arcane)
Contingency Planning (Arcane)
Lmao, 4 of 5 written in 2022. You can see the power of writing m/m in a popular new fandom VS my entire other library at the time. Admittedly at some point I made a concerted effort to try and knock HP down from top spot, which was successful. For now. Jayvik fandom has quieted down a lot.
5. do you respond to comments? Yes. Sometimes it takes a while because if it's a particularly thoughtful comment I try to give a particularly thoughtful reply, and it can take time to gather my thoughts.
6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending? I'm going to discount oneshots because the tone in one-shots tends to be more consistent throughout the piece rather than being about the "ending" yknow.
So probably King and Country, a Doctor Who fic cowritten with @go-ldy way back when. Technically a happy ending if you factor in immense amounts of off-screen couples therapy lmao. But we had originally written something much simpler and happier, and it didn't fit the story at all, so we went back and wrote something heavier for the closing chapter, which is why it sticks in my mind.
7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending? I think probably Anachronism, the 95k Borderlands epic. I had always had a rough image of the four main characters happy together by the end, and it was also my swansong in Borderlands fandom, so I wanted it to be an optimistic, happy ending (especially in contrast to whatever the hell is going on in the canon there now lmfaoooo). Plus the rest of the fic was quite angsty, and the ending was hopeful and happy.
8. Do you get hate on fics? Not in recent memory. Once upon a time I got a couple disgruntled comments in Doctor Who fandom, and perhaps funniest of all found people complaining about my fic on LJ in French, unaware I read French.
9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind? Nope I'm a big baby who gets too embarrassed. I've written some pretty soft-focus M rated stuff but nothing I think could rightly be called smut.
10. Do you write crossovers? What’s the craziest one you’ve written? I wrote a short joke crossover between Doctor Who and Inspector Spacetime, the Doctor Who parody from Community. I don't think that one made the leap from Teaspoon to AO3 actually.
11. Have you ever had a fic stolen? Not that I'm aware of
12. Have you ever had a fic translated? Yes, a number of times. It's very flattering. Mostly Borderlands fics and mostly into Russian iirc, but there's been a few over the years. Sometimes people ask, and I say "sure, drop me a link!" and I never hear back, so I'm not sure if they forgot to link or just never finished translating to begin with.
13. Have you ever co-written a fic before? My longest and best DW fics with @go-ldy way back when! Not so much since.
14. What’s your all time favorite ship? I'm gonna be real it always just feels like whatever I'm into at the moment. And, actually, not necessarily something I write fic for -- like Pricefield is an all-timer for me, easy, but I have never written fic and I haven't read all that much either. If I were narrowing to tree, one of "each" lol, probably Doctor/Rose, Pricefield and Narumitsu.
15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will? Don't have any. I know I will never finish them (RIP Fixer-Upper and Silly Love Songs) as I've lost interest in those fandoms.
16. What are your writing strengths? I'd like to think I am good at packing emotional and/or character beats into a concise scene or story. Adding missing scenes or elaborating on canon scenes to give some additional depth or meaning without really deviating from the source.
17. What are your writing weaknesses? Definitely plot. I will get stumped on the technicalities of things for ages -- I might know an emotional scene I'd like to write, but hell if I know how to get them there. It's why I primarily write one-shots. Also I struggle with any kind of scenery or set description.
18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic? I avoid it as much as I can. (Which so far has been entirely, lol.) I don't speak any other languages well enough to write dialogue in them and feel awkward relying on Google translate or hitting up random friends to do that work for me. I am more likely to use the "said something in [language]" approach.
19. First fandom you wrote for? I actually can't be sure but I think it was 101 Dalmatians. The animated one. When I was like, 7.
20. Favorite fic you’ve written? I'm gonna cheat and do one per fandom:
Anachronism (Borderlands) -> biggest, most complicated, plotty fic I have ever written, with four main characters and every combination of relationship between them as the focus. Took 3 damn years. Very proud of it.
Unravel (Ace Attorney) -> total recency bias here but I'm very happy with it and it scratched a very particular itch for me, fleshing out a relationship and characters that exist mostly in the fringes of canon, something I used to do lots of but haven't in recent years
Contingency Planning (Arcane) -> an emotional sucker punch fic in my humble opinion, happiest with it
Out of the Howling (Doctor Who, with @go-ldy) -> actually I had a hard time picking a DW fic. But this was our last together and most complex, so it wins. Also the Master is fun as hell to write.
I am supposed to tag people! I am not sure who else has already been tagged. Do it or don't, I'm not your boss, happy new year 🎊 @annalyticall @heavybreathingcatt @sandboxer @mutxnts @tinsnip @tlonista @themirokai
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n3on-graveston3s-calling · 3 months ago
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I'm gonna answer these both right now.
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These have been sitting in my ask box for a few days and admittedly, I was just gonna let them rot there but.
Let's talk.
I write in my spare time. I don't get paid to write fanfictions ( unless they are commissioned pieces, which are all on a hold for the foreseeable future ), imagines, etc. It's something I do when I have the time & I have the muse to do so.
Why haven't I been writing as much?
-I suffered 2 major deaths in my family literally 2 weeks apart from each other. The first one, I was in vacation in another state & had to cut it short, turn around, and drive 1600 miles in 3 days to go home, pick up my family, drive to my other family, have the funeral, go through a tornado outbreak that same night while staying in a hotel & having nowhere to go, find out that some of my relatives houses were damaged & the city they lived in had been majorly damaged by the tornadoes, and then drive home. And then, 2 weeks later, there's another death on the other side of my family. So my summer was spent grieving and in funerals.
-Prior to that, I have depression!! I had a depressive episode that lasted for a hot minute where I didn't do anything!!
-NOW, I got a new job & am back to work for the first time in 1 year and 8 months. It took me a year and eight months to find a job that is nowhere even near my degree field. Wild shit. Anyways. My new job takes a LOT of mental strength. I work as an attorney's assistant. I work Wednesday & Thursday, all day. Fridays are my half days. Which doesn't sound bad!! Except I have a stack of things I have to file that is nearly 200 pages deep bc there was a gap between the person before me leaving & when I started that they got behind. So I'm busy 20 hours a week. & what I handle can be VERY emotionally hard, as I've recently found out. I can't share details bc privacy laws- but I have to read some not great shit.
-In the 4 days that I have off, I help my mother. I'm a partial caretaker for her; I do all of the grocery runs & doctor appointments in those spare times.
So. Yknow. I enjoy writing, I have requests that I've been working on & things in my drafts that I do work on in my free time, but like. I have a life, yknow? And I know everyone has shit going on in their personal lives, I get that. I know fanfiction & fandom is an escape.
But I'm just a person. I have a partner who I try to spend as much time as possible with bc we're long distance. There's a lot more happening that I'm not gonna talk about here because quite frankly- it isn't anyone's business.
I love writing. I love making fanfiction and I love writing requests but y'all have got to stop treating us writers like your personal fiction creators that exist only for your beck & call. Bc I've seen that happen a LOT over the last few years. Majority of us do this for free because we enjoy it. That's it.
So yeah. I will post when I have something done or if I have any silly little thoughts I wanna share about whichever character is taking up space in my brain.
K thanks bye.
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plagueislost · 4 months ago
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Hii, for the artist ask game: number 4 and 10 is something I'd love to know :3
i wrote A LOT for this ask, sorry! i wanted to do the questions justice, yknow how it is.
4. piece you wish got more love?
Ive found from experience that original art tends to not do very well on social media, which kind of makes me sad. It's not much of a problem for me (because most of the stuff i post is fanart anyways) but i can't help but think that part of the reason i rarely ever draw original pieces or make OCs is because of the lack of feedback i get on social media. I know tumblr is supposed to be the fandom website, and maybe id have a different experience on another site, but it is disappointing when i post something original that I'm very proud of and it barely manages to get more than 20 notes, whereas something i like less easily surpasses 100 just because of the tags i put on it. i think the most recent example of this is this piece, which admittedly did get quite a few notes for an original piece, but definitely would have gotten more had it been fanart of the same caliber. this is also not to blame anyone or make anyone feel bad about not reblogging original art (god knows im guilty of that too, and art piggybacking off the popularity of other works of art are of course gonna get more notes), its just something ive noticed from my time on social media.
10. how do you deal with artblock?
i dont get art block very often, but when i do, its ANNOYING. it mostly manifests in me having a bunch of motivation for a part of my process that i cant get to without doing the stuff i have no desire to do (does that make any sense?). like, ill have a strong urge to render an artwork, but no ongoing WIPs that are at that stage, meaning i would have to sketch and color and shade a whole new piece before i could satiate that urge, or do the steps out of order which could mess up the flow and end look of a project. when i get like this, i find its best to try and translate those desires into different activities and take a step away from art. for example:
if i want to sketch, but nothing comes out right digitally, ill find a scrap piece of paper and a crappy pen and make thumbnails until i cant think of any other iterations of the ideas in my head. if one of them turns out good, ill take a picture and transfer it into my software, but only go over it a day or so later so i can have fresh eyes.
if i want to color, but i have no sketches currently ready for coloring, ill go into my photo editing program, find some random old photos that i never edited, and post-process them until i get something im happy with.
if i want to shade, but have no colored artworks ready for that, ill usually do a study of a photo ive taken, because most of the time me shading is really me wanting to see how light and shadow interact in certain scenarios. i actually did a whole AP portfolio on that because i liked shading and lighting so much!
if i want to render, but ive got no pieces ready for rendering, i find its easiest just to find a tedious activity where i can be a perfectionist but also feel like im the smartest person in the world. this generally turns into me cooking some big meal because its constantly engaging but also not that difficult. i know its probably weird for it to not have anything to do with art but this is just what works best for me, and i get the bonus of a nice meal at the end of it!
if i get the more classic kind of art block where everything sucks and nothing i make is good, i find its best to go back to the media that inspires me to make art, and not worry too much about having made something by the end of it. generally the media that inspires me ends up, well, inspiring me, and i can remind myself that art is a voluntary practice that i do because its fun, not because i want something out of it. if it doesnt manage to inspire me, thats okay, i can just tell myself im taking a break and live life for a bit.
i hope that was helpful, and i really enjoyed answering these questions! if anyone else wants to ask a question, the artist ask game is here.
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fake-static-airspace · 1 month ago
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omggg i never get tagged in stuff like this lets goooo >:3 time to infodump gang
last song: Gallery Piece by Of Montreal!
fav color: i have trouble picking, because i've had a lot over the years... really i don't think a bad color exists, just poor uses for them. but i really like pink, yellow, and blue!
last book: actively reading "Paleontology; A Brief History of Life" by Ian Tattersall right now, because i wanna learn more abt that field... but the last narrative book i read was "Carrie" by Stephen King. I've been reading a lot recently, actually, because I've been making it a point to do so!!! Going to the library a decent amount, reading is part of a cornerstone of being a good writer, after all~ ehehe. also been reading fanfiction my friends send me, and the most recent one i actually read was. fucking. tool assisted speedrun. iykyk.
last movie: Electric Dreams!! such a fun movie, such a win for objectums.
last show: Fullmetal Alchemist Brotherhood, and i only got to watch the last half :sob: i watched it with someone i stopped talking to, long story, but i do want to watch it from the beginning at some point. it was really fucking solid, and i don't usually watch anime.
sweet//spicy//savory: i like all three in certain conditions, duh. combine sweet and savory and my heart is yours, though. i don't have a favorite out of the bunch bc it changes on the daily.
relationship status: weird as fuck to say this because i've never gotten to before, but taken? i'm in a queerplatonic relationship! we're both aro/ace spec, but we really like each other so yknow. friendship+ hehe. i won't like, yap too much because i've realized that i'm a "wife/husband/spouse guy," in that i will sit there and talk abt my partner with this dumb look on my face for a decent amount of time, if given the opportunity. i like himb :3
last thing i googled: "can you mix fabuloso and bleach" i made chlorine gas while cleaning yesterday!!!!!!!!! everyone is fine but maybe i should have googled that before mixing them!!!!!
latest obsession: i've been playing soooo much fucking minecraft w my friends, its insane. thinking a lot about gravity falls and my ocs again. ultrakill is still there, i don't think it's going anywhere for a while. been a very relaxed period for me.
looking forward to: halloween!! always!!! and of course, general holiday season, but only bc i'm broke and christmas money sounds lovely right about now. always looking forward to hyperfixations on hiatus getting updates, naturally, naturally. rain world dlc is coming out next march, that's pretty fucking exciting!
time to annoy my mutuals LMAO YIPPEE!!!! we can tag @themaskedpan, haven't spoken to you in a while!! haii :3 hope ur doing well!! @bluefire-axolotl, we spoke literally yesterday and you don't have to do this if you don't wanna, but i need people to tag so. you have fallen victim. @infinite--hyperdeath, YOU TOO!!! >:3 @unfunny-guy-the-emoji, you'd probably enjoying doing this admittedly. @mvee2, and you too!! we haven't spoken much but ur super nice and i love ur art!!
ten people i'd like to get to know better
tagged by: @megkuna thanks <333
last song: the phantom of the opera
favorite color: muted green
last book: uhhhhhh oh man i really need to start reading books
last movie: phantom of the opera which i watched with a friend
last tv show: the original star trek which i also watched with a friend
sweet/spicy/savory: sweet, i love sugar too much
relationship status: single and not looking, i'd rather just have more friends
last thing i googled: "how to know if skincare routine is too harsh" my pimples hurt in a Different way now :(
current obsession: probably still mob psycho 100 but it's not what it used to be. yay depression
looking forward to: when my family finally moves into the new house
tagging: @scarecloud69 @disorganised-thoughtss @daneonrainbow @lawful-goof @officialkarinuzumaki @leo-probably @vychodocech @umkayonninay @mocha-blossom @spageddy29 no pressure though <3
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wavemaker9 · 5 years ago
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Was thinking about spn au again, specifically soulless kyle + the doug thing, and ya’ll want a thought?
So I already suggested the bit of Kyle trying to explain to Gil and Ivan like. Hey this soulless thing is actually working out really well for me and it baffles me that you don’t see it the same way too, i’m /not/ looking to get my soul back, no thank you. But then him later admitting to ludwig (matt? we had suggested the swap to matt recently after the prev posts so I’ll swap to matt too I guess) that he doesn’t think any of it got through and he still thinks they’re going to try something so him thinking he needs to try something first + his referring to soul!kyle as “him” instead of even the “old me” he’d probably been using for a while after the soulless thing first came out, fully solidifying okay he has completely distanced himself which isn’t good. Matt tells gil and ivan like hey we should work on fixing this soon since he didn’t specify an option but he seems like he’ll at least be looking for a way to prevent his soul coming back so like.
Another point I had suggested in another post though was soulless!Kyle getting to meet Doug again, via some bullshit flashback showing that doug wasn’t killed by the three during the first encounter and managed to get his old body back or whatever. Honestly, could get a new one, that’d probably be fine. God, imagine if I introduced jodie into this AU by having her be the next body Doug takes on. Anyway anyway, whether he looks like himself or not, him having a major grudge against the group, mainly gil, ivan, and matt. Kyle’s a nuisance and it sucked having to pretend to give a shit about him, but he was easy to play and he ultimately wasn’t the one who ruined doug’s plans. So Doug lowkey looking for revenge and when he finds the gang again, starts to make plans in the bg. Except at one point, him and Kyle running into each other when it’s just Kyle, and at first Doug thinks he’s fucked on this plan, but tries to do damage control until he realizes something’s clearly off with Kyle. Doug tells him to spill on what’s up with him (i don’t think demons can tell if a person is missing a soul but if so he auto knows from that) and while Kyle argues against it at first because he doesn’t owe doug anything let alone telling him this, he’s eventually either talked into telling him or just lets slip enough clues + doug realizing what kyle’s snuck away to try and research for so that doug can guess at it, which kyle confirms and starts to try and focus on the ‘i’m going to exorcise you so i can get back to work’ thing since having doug here is way more of a hinderance than a help. Except Doug offers yknow, he /could/ help here, if Kyle were interested. At the confirmation that Kyle doesn’t want his soul back and is looking for a way to stop it, but can’t find anything, Doug like oh /mate/ it sure is your lucky day. Doug directing him to some other source of lore in the area to show him there IS actually a spell you can do that’ll make it impossible to put your soul back, scars the vessel so the soul can’t return and all that. All you need is x, y, z, and ‘the blood of the father’ (i really should put the effort into looking up the wording but like. Yknow, idc). Kyle offering his dad’s dead so thanks for nothing, but Doug cutting him off like ‘you know that old magic, lots of wiggle room’ and explains it really only has to be anyone who was a father figure or guardian really, like say, an older brother kyle /used/ to look up to and who hangs over him like a watchful parent a lotta the time, for instance?
Kyle suspicious, knowing that doug can’t really be trusted but also given that doug was able to provide a bit more concrete evidence of this physical piece of lore backing it up, he’s not completely dismissing it. Asks why Doug would want to help him again and Doug waving off oh he’s not, he’s helping himself. Given how their last encounter went + how Kyle is now, Doug knows he doesn’t have to sugar coat anything or bullshit the kid, and that it’s frankly better if he doesn’t. He can just walk kyle through the steps to explain why this is good for both of them. Doug laying out that he’s more mad at the others than Kyle. He’s still fucking annoyed as shit by Kyle- though admittedly less by this version of him than the old kid, and either way, he can pick his battles. But, and Doug brings up three fingers at this: kyle kills Gil for the spell, that’s one down, and he folds one finger over. He says he’s hoping Kyle has to kill at least one of the other two to get away with it, but let’s say that he doesn’t. Kyle thinks Matt’s going to hang around once Gil’s dead? Absolutely not, so he’ll be on his own, easy for him to handle, fold another finger down. And finally Ivan? Without the chance of getting his old boyfriend back? Doug’s sure Ivan’s been putting up with a lotta shit for Kyle to hold onto the idea of this all returning to normal, but once that’s done, once he physically /can’t/ get Kyle back, Ivan’ll spiral and probably drop off from the group too. If another hunter doesn’t finish him off, Doug will easily, and there folds the final finger.
Kyle clearly considering, but finally frowns and shakes his head. He’s not looking to get them all killed exactly, he just needs them off his back. Working with them has its benefits, he just doesn’t want them wasting time and energy trying to “fix” him when he’s not broken. Doug countering back that Kyle’s really going to let /that/ stop him? Don’t tell him that Kyle’s really going to put the others’ lives over his own when they clearly won’t do the same for him if he’s pushed to these extremes to get them to stop from overwriting /his/ existence with this shittier version of him. Not to mention how long until they actually find a way to force his soul back in? You think they’re gonna give him the same courtesy of second guessing and giving him more time to find a way to stop it, if there even is another way which doug doesn’t think there is? Kyle offering he could try running if it came down to it but Doug just laughing at that. You’re gonna escape all three of them after waiting for a point when they’ll /know/ he’ll be ready to leave. Plus, /please/ tell me how well trying to run from a stubborn vampire who’s faster, stronger, and tougher than you goes when the vampire still thinks there’s a chance to fix this boyfriend he’s sunk so much energy into. The only way to be /certain/ is to scar the vessel and make it /physically impossible/ to stick the soul back in. otherwise, the others will find a way and kyle knows it.
Kyle finally reluctantly sighing, admitting those are all good points. He hates to agree, but doug’s not wrong here. Doug adding on, too, that the only one Kyle’d /really/ be killing is Gil, anyway, he doesn’t have to hurt either of the other two if he’s careful. Doug can also promise as needed not to go after the other two or whatever, but does reiterate that a rogue vampire or an inexperienced hunter don’t have great odds (because he can just go kill them anyway and kyle won’t know for sure if it was him or not. Plus like. Doug can say “I don’t care about killing you as much as the others” but if Kyle’s all alone too, he’ll be easier to take out too, so who really cares?).
And all those points finally being what flips Kyle over to agreeing it’s the most logical option and thus, trying to put the plan into action. I dunno if I want Doug to slip back into the BG after that or have Kyle try to get his help since it’ll be easier to overpower gil enough to tie him up for the sacrifice with a demon’s help. I do think it’d be kind of a shame to introduce doug just for this bit and not have him stick around as an extra threat. Plus, Gil finding out what Kyle’s planning when kyle puts the action into place + finding out kyle found out from doug’s suggestion & is working with him ///again///??? just ???? kyle what the FUCK??? Trying to kill your BROTHER is bad enough but trying to kill YOUR BROTHER because that shitty DEMON we all HATE who is a KNOWN LIAR told you it’d make it so you couldn’t get your soul back is FUCKED UP how do you NOT see the issue in you not having a soul, soul!you would know now not to listen to doug, what the FUCK? With kyle then having to present his counters of ‘you all won’t give up and I can’t avoid or run forever, what do you want me to do????’
Also almost forgot but i remember seeing talk of ludwig punching kyle in the face to stop him in the prev post so now matt gets to do that instead. matt seeing kyle has tied up gilbert to sacrifice him and possibly has doug there with him and just first order of business is punch kyle out before they turn on doug as needed. if doug is there, him probably smoking out real fast if able, this was fun bye nerds
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Pour Me Another
In which Jade visits Dirk at the bar and they drink while sharing feelings. Also a brief meeting of Arquius. @sangriaprince​ @aihorse100seinamanor​
🌺 Shadow 🌺 (Jade/Skylla)01/06/2019
> You need a drink. Or five. This week's been trying and while talking to PI when he came to your shop helped, it still was painful. You... haven't even gotten to see her yet. Droog is still with her body; you can't blame him, not one bit. You admittedly don't know if you want to see her corpse.  > So thus, you need those drinks. And maybe a friend too. Hence you going to the Angel's bar closer to the end of his shift. You dress a little more modestly, hair still pinned up, but you keep on your glasses tonight. If you pass out drunk you don't want contacts in again. 
Avery (PS/Sol/Dirk/Disci/CS)01/06/2019
> It's a little tough having to run this singlehandedly now, especially when you've got a shot leg. Regardless, you shuffle through and sigh.  > When you see Jade walk in through the entrance, you can't help but smile. You walk over to the counter after whipping up a Manhattan -- just like how you and she first met -- and you place it in front of her.  ".. hey..."
🌺 Shadow 🌺 (Jade/Skylla)01/06/2019
> You smile back, taking the drink with a wink. Man he knows you so well at this point huh?~  "Hey yourself. Hope you don't mind be coming by. Felt like seeing a friend tonight."
Avery (PS/Sol/Dirk/Disci/CS)01/06/2019
> Shake your head, and shrug, leaning against the counter to let off the weight off your leg. "Nah, of course not. Why'd I turn down a visit from Jade?"
🌺 Shadow 🌺 (Jade/Skylla)01/06/2019
"Heh, Flatterer~" > You take a sip from your drink; still the best Manhattan around. "It's just... been a long week for me. You?"
Avery (PS/Sol/Dirk/Disci/CS)01/06/2019
> Shrug again, running a hand through your hair. "I getcha. I may not know what's up with your side of the city, but it's been a week for me too."
🌺 Shadow 🌺 (Jade/Skylla)01/06/2019
"Oh? Well now I'm curious~" > You grin as you study him. He... looks tired actually. Poor guy; was he working more than he should? "Anything you'd be willing to tell a friend about?~"
Avery (PS/Sol/Dirk/Disci/CS)01/06/2019
> Sift through the information you can tell her without giving too much. > Smile a little, putting away a few glasses that were left on the counter. "Well, I had to force myself to take a leave to attend to some business. I do robotics as a hobby, you know. Had to make something for an old close friend."
🌺 Shadow 🌺 (Jade/Skylla)01/06/2019
"Ooh robotics huh?" > That sounds really neat, if illegal. Not that you care! You keep your vice low, just in case. "Were you successful? It's not easy finding certain pieces yknow?"
Avery (PS/Sol/Dirk/Disci/CS)01/06/2019
> Nod. "It was easy when you know someone with the knack for technology.
🌺 Shadow 🌺 (Jade/Skylla)01/07/2019
> That made sense. "That's good! How'd your friend take to your finished project?"
Avery (PS/Sol/Dirk/Disci/CS)01/07/2019
"Not that well. It's temporary anyway, so when I can again, I'll work on it again." > Clear your throat as you mix up a single drink -- your hours are almost over anyway, you can have one for yourself. "And then other things happened and said buddy is taking care of me. Helping me out with things that don't concern the bar."
🌺 Shadow 🌺 (Jade/Skylla)01/07/2019
> You frown a little as you drink a little more from your glass. "Hmm, well I hope your friend didn't rag on you too much; you need a real good dealer for the good materials these days." > Wait taking care of him is that why he leaning who tried harming your friend? "Hope you aren't too hurt then?"
Avery (PS/Sol/Dirk/Disci/CS)01/07/2019
"It wasn't the material really, it was more of the model itself. But he's telling me not to focus on it yet, so there's that." > Chuckle and nod. "Nothing too bad. It was just a bit of a stab to the knee, but it'll heal."
🌺 Shadow 🌺 (Jade/Skylla)01/07/2019
"Eh?! Dirk a stab to a knee can be pretty bad!" > You would know; you've stabbed many people this way. " You sure you should be walking around tonight??"
Avery (PS/Sol/Dirk/Disci/CS)01/07/2019
> You nod again, taking a sip of your tequila. "Yes, I'm fine. I had a day's rest and I'm alright. Nothing too much."
🌺 Shadow 🌺 (Jade/Skylla)01/07/2019
> You pull a face at him but don't press. You are far too familiar with the Strider Stubbornness after all " Well then, anything else of note happened?"
Avery (PS/Sol/Dirk/Disci/CS)01/07/2019
"..." > Clear your throat again and shrug. "... I think I found my bro."
🌺 Shadow 🌺 (Jade/Skylla)01/07/2019
> Blink. Blink again. "Wait but--" > Lowers voice again "I thought you said he died??? Is he this world's version ooor...???"
Avery (PS/Sol/Dirk/Disci/CS)01/07/2019
"I know what I said." > Push shades up and pinch the bridge of your nose. "I know what I said... What I still don't know is that if he's actually my bro, or some other guy from another universe. I just... It sucks, Jade. To think I was such an idiot and wanted to approach him immediately?" > Cover your eyes. "God. Made the guy uncomfortable as fuck -- he's more open to Sock now, for Christ's sake, so much for being a great bro."
🌺 Shadow 🌺 (Jade/Skylla)01/07/2019
> Swirl your glass before downing the rest and reaching for his hand. "Dirk you're not an idiot. Not by a long shot. You're human; of course when you see someone that have been your Bro  you'd war to meet him!" "So you made him uncomfortable; that was an accident! I don't know what you said but may be just give it time. Okay?
Avery (PS/Sol/Dirk/Disci/CS)01/07/2019
> When she takes your hand you lower the one over your eyes and you look at her tiredly, gaze flickering from her to your hands before you sigh.   > You nod lightly. "Yeah... Yeah, I'll give it time. Thanks."
🌺 Shadow 🌺 (Jade/Skylla)01/07/2019
> You give him a soft smile; though one that slowly fades from your face. "Besides, at least you still have a chance to speak with him, even if you have to wait..." > Now it's your turn to bow your head. "I.... don't.  Not anymore."
Avery (PS/Sol/Dirk/Disci/CS)01/07/2019
> You know. But she doesn't know that. > So instead, you lean a little closer, sympathy on your face as you frown a little. "... What do you mean?"
🌺 Shadow 🌺 (Jade/Skylla)01/07/2019
> You can't give all the details. Besides it still hurts to talk about it. > But isn't that why you're here? "My friend... she passed away recently."
Avery (PS/Sol/Dirk/Disci/CS)01/07/2019
> Hearing it from someone who wasn't responsible for the death was... An experience, to say the least. > You frown a little bit more, looking around only to find the bar almost empty, so you limp your way to the back, grabbing a bottle of sipping whiskey and two glasses with ice before you move to go around, gritting your teeth everytime your leg feels the weight, and you sit beside her, pouring whiskey for the both of you. "... Do you want to talk about it?"
🌺 Shadow 🌺 (Jade/Skylla)01/07/2019
> It was an experience wasn't it? And strangely enough, it's similar to how you felt when your Grandpa died. > You note his leg and feel that Dirk was downplaying his injury, but you take the whiskey with a murmured thanks. "...she was my friend. A very close one. We were supposed to meet up on New Years Eve, but she was late. That wasn't like her, not without telling." "...later I got a text from her dad that she was d-dead." > You knock back the whiskey, pretending the burn is why your eyes get teary
Avery (PS/Sol/Dirk/Disci/CS)01/07/2019
> You sip your drink, carding a hand through your hair as you lower your shades and sigh. > You want to smoke. > But you move your free hand to rest on Jade's shoulder over her back and you give it a squeeze. "... can I ask if this was related to the fire?"
🌺 Shadow 🌺 (Jade/Skylla)01/07/2019
> Fire? Ah, yeah, that was in the papers wasn't it? Aradia's name nor her murder was but there was all sorts of speculations. "Kinda... she wasn't burned... actually I'm not even sure how she died, other than she was killed." > You lean into Dirk as you clutch your glass "She was a good person; it shouldn't have been her time..."
Avery (PS/Sol/Dirk/Disci/CS)01/07/2019
> You know too much and when Jade leans into you, you just pull her close, tucking her head beneath your chin. "... I know how that feels." > You close your eyes. "... and I'm so sorry."
🌺 Shadow 🌺 (Jade/Skylla)01/07/2019
> You're not able to say much, not with your throat constricting and tears threatening to spill once more. > Instead you just wrap your arms around him and hug trying to show your appreciation all the same
Avery (PS/Sol/Dirk/Disci/CS)01/07/2019
> ... > You lower your glass and you wrap your now free arm around her, rubbing her back and burying your face into her hair. > This was the least you could do.
🌺 Shadow 🌺 (Jade/Skylla)01/07/2019
> You probably stay like that for a few minutes before reluctantly pulling away. "Heh, sorry; didn't mean to cry on you." > You've been doing that too much. You gotta stop that...
Avery (PS/Sol/Dirk/Disci/CS)01/07/2019
> You let her pull away if she wants, but the arm closer to her stays on her shoulder. > You shake your head and you give her a small smile. "We all need to let it out sometimes. It's better if you do, instead of bottling it up, you know."
🌺 Shadow 🌺 (Jade/Skylla)01/07/2019
> You don't mind the arm there; it's genuinely comforting "I suppose so... though then you should probably take your advice too.: > You gently prod his chest with a finger "I feel like finding your Brother is more of a bigger deal than you let on Dirk."
Avery (PS/Sol/Dirk/Disci/CS)01/07/2019
> The prod makes you chuckle and you shake your head. "I don't know." > You shrug and let out a heavy sigh. "I'll let it do it's own thing for now. Approach him when it's under better circumstances."
🌺 Shadow 🌺 (Jade/Skylla)01/07/2019
"That sounds safe. Besides maybe observing from a distance will help you figure out exactly who he is." > Information is always vital in situations like this "Though I gotta admit, the city is starting to get real crowded with all you Striders~"
Avery (PS/Sol/Dirk/Disci/CS)01/07/2019
> That draws another chuckle from you. "It sure is, huh? All seven of us... wow."
🌺 Shadow 🌺 (Jade/Skylla)01/07/2019
"Seven?" > Wait did you miscount? Dirk, Dave, Sock, Sock's brother, the Hal guy, now Dirk's brother... maybe Cal? But you don't know if he knows Cal so...? "Who's Strider Number Seven then?~"
Avery (PS/Sol/Dirk/Disci/CS)01/07/2019
"There's me, Dave, Sock, the other Dirk, his Hal, me, my Hal -- of which I call Arq -- and then maybe my bro." > Shrug.
🌺 Shadow 🌺 (Jade/Skylla)01/07/2019
"Oh! I didn't know you had a Hal of your own." > puts two n two together "Wait is this Arq the friend you were helping then?"
Avery (PS/Sol/Dirk/Disci/CS)01/07/2019
> Nod. "He's the one."
🌺 Shadow 🌺 (Jade/Skylla)01/07/2019
"Sooo does that mean you were building a robotic body for him?"
Avery (PS/Sol/Dirk/Disci/CS)01/07/2019
"Yes."
🌺 Shadow 🌺 (Jade/Skylla)01/07/2019
"... cool." > giggles suddenly! "What's he like your Hal??"
Avery (PS/Sol/Dirk/Disci/CS)01/07/2019
"Well, for one thing, he isn't Hal anymore. Due to consuming some data, I've asked him if he wanted to be known by another name. So I call him Arquius now." > Card a hand through your hair. "He's AI I developed way back when."
🌺 Shadow 🌺 (Jade/Skylla)01/07/2019
"Arquius is a unique name~" > Kinda sounds like Equius. What an odd coincidence! "Oh! Then did he come with you when you.... first arrived here?"
Avery (PS/Sol/Dirk/Disci/CS)01/07/2019
> Shake your head. "No, he came after. He... he came for me."
🌺 Shadow 🌺 (Jade/Skylla)01/07/2019
> Oh shit "Dirk, does that mean there's a way back... to the other place?" > Hey there's still one or two bodies around
Avery (PS/Sol/Dirk/Disci/CS)01/07/2019
> Chew on the inside of your cheek. "It looks like it. But he's .. he's been having trouble with his plans.."
🌺 Shadow 🌺 (Jade/Skylla)01/07/2019
"Oh..." > You feel... odd about this. You would be happy for him to go home, but you feel you'd miss him terribly "Well.... what sort of trouble?"
Avery (PS/Sol/Dirk/Disci/CS)01/07/2019
"It's not really trouble? More of like... things stopping him from doing his plans with the danger of him being reprogrammed." > Take a loooooong sip and sigh as you put the glass down.  "And I'm scared to lose him that way."(edited)
🌺 Shadow 🌺 (Jade/Skylla)01/07/2019
> Being reprogrammed? Oh no that doesn't sound great at all "I'm sorry Dirk... maybe... you can save some of the way he is? Just in case?" > You don't know if that is morally wrong?? Wow you need more of that whiskey
Avery (PS/Sol/Dirk/Disci/CS)01/07/2019
"He told me he already had it backed up, so I trust him." > Pour yourself and her another glass of that whiskey. "I just... don't think I'll be able to handle that."(edited)
🌺 Shadow 🌺 (Jade/Skylla)01/07/2019
"Honestly I don't think I would either." > Leans against him as you take a sip "Is there no chance to protect him form that?"
Avery (PS/Sol/Dirk/Disci/CS)01/07/2019
> You chuckle dryly. "If there was a chance or a way, I would have done everything."
🌺 Shadow 🌺 (Jade/Skylla)01/07/2019
> That's a good point. You fucking idiot. "I'm sorry Dirk, I really hope your friend will be safe."
Avery (PS/Sol/Dirk/Disci/CS)01/07/2019
> But maybe you haven't done everything. > Though you don't know how to make him seem loyal to the Felt without pissing him off to the next planet. > ... You wish it never came to this. > You lower your head. "I hope so, too."
🌺 Shadow 🌺 (Jade/Skylla)01/07/2019
> Oh, you made him sad didn't you? > ...gently hugs him again because hugs are good; and you give the best hugs "Hey, whatever happens, you can get through it. You survived a lot so far Dirk. I doubt it's been easy but if you can handle that, you can handle this too."
Avery (PS/Sol/Dirk/Disci/CS)01/07/2019
> You return the hug, giving her a gentle squeeze before you sigh. "... thanks Jade."
🌺 Shadow 🌺 (Jade/Skylla)01/07/2019
"No problem." > You give him another smile as you let go before downing your glass "...think you're off shift now?~"
Avery (PS/Sol/Dirk/Disci/CS)01/07/2019
> You look at your wrist watch and chuckle. > Nod. "Yeah. I'm off now."
🌺 Shadow 🌺 (Jade/Skylla)01/07/2019
"Awesome." > Stands to stretch a bit "Wanna go to another bar then?"
Avery (PS/Sol/Dirk/Disci/CS)01/07/2019
> You shake your head. "I'd rather not tonight. Not with this leg."
🌺 Shadow 🌺 (Jade/Skylla)01/07/2019
> Oh right that leg! Hmm... "How about I help you back to your apartment then?"
Avery (PS/Sol/Dirk/Disci/CS)01/07/2019
"I can handle." > Shrug and get up, moving to bring the glasses to the back again. "You go on ahead."
🌺 Shadow 🌺 (Jade/Skylla)01/07/2019
"Dirk you dumbass." > Gives him such a Look "You're not going to get home at a reasonable time without help."
Avery (PS/Sol/Dirk/Disci/CS)01/07/2019
> You roll your eyes and shake your head. "Alright, alright. Geez."
🌺 Shadow 🌺 (Jade/Skylla)01/07/2019
> Helps him up all the same > You are unapologetic. Nope! Not one bit. "Time to go home Strider~"
Avery (PS/Sol/Dirk/Disci/CS)01/07/2019
> Chuckle as you set away the glasses. > Lean a little against her. "I hear ya Harley."
🌺 Shadow 🌺 (Jade/Skylla)01/07/2019
> Giggles and helps him out of the bar > Hey, maybe you'll get a glimpse of this Arq guy~
Avery (PS/Sol/Dirk/Disci/CS)01/07/2019
> You make your way to the apartment and you unlock the door. "Well, we're here."
🌺 Shadow 🌺 (Jade/Skylla)01/07/2019
> Hums a little as he opens the door "You sure you're gonna be okay? You better rest your leg."
♠ Leo ♠ (CA/AD/KV/PSI/ARQ)01/07/2019
> You are somewhere. You are places. > You are Arq, you watch.
Avery (PS/Sol/Dirk/Disci/CS)01/07/2019
> You nod, giving her a small smile. "I will. Thanks again."
🌺 Shadow 🌺 (Jade/Skylla)01/07/2019
> Gives him a bright smile! "It's no problem; happy to help a friend~" > Smile turns a little more softer "Chin up okay? If you do, I will too."
Avery (PS/Sol/Dirk/Disci/CS)01/07/2019
> You nod and you give her one last hug. "Yeah. We can do this."
🌺 Shadow 🌺 (Jade/Skylla)01/07/2019
> Accepts the hug!!! "We can!~" > Presses a smooch to his cheek before letting go "Have a good night Dirk."
Avery (PS/Sol/Dirk/Disci/CS)01/07/2019
> >:O > Return the smooch. > Pull away as well. "See ya."
♠ Leo ♠ (CA/AD/KV/PSI/ARQ)01/07/2019
"That is adorable. Is that your girlfriend, bro?" > Eyes glow in the dark. SMILE.
🌺 Shadow 🌺 (Jade/Skylla)01/07/2019
> Jumps slightly, nearly pulling out a knife "Uh... Dirk...? Is that Arquius or....?" > Look if you gotta stab someone--!
Avery (PS/Sol/Dirk/Disci/CS)01/07/2019
> You roll your eyes. "Yes, it's Arquius." > Turn to look inside. "And no, she's not my girlfriend, Arq."
♠ Leo ♠ (CA/AD/KV/PSI/ARQ)01/07/2019
>Tilt your head, eyes still glowing red in the dark, you haven't moved besides that. "Then who is she?" >That's a false statement, you know her name. At least you have seen her online, well not her, but Equius has which makes it easy crunchy info for you.
🌺 Shadow 🌺 (Jade/Skylla)01/07/2019
"I'm Jade! Though you probably knew that already?" > If he's an AI it's probably bound to happen right? At least, you assume he knows the basic stuff "Nice to meet you!"
Avery (PS/Sol/Dirk/Disci/CS)01/07/2019
> Sigh softly. "She's a good friend."
♠ Leo ♠ (CA/AD/KV/PSI/ARQ)01/07/2019
"You are quite smart, that is excellent. I STRONGLY support this friendship." > finally step out of the dark to a more visible and comfortable spot for all parties.  "Nice to meet you too." >Offer handshake.(edited)
🌺 Shadow 🌺 (Jade/Skylla)01/07/2019
> Gives a pleasant smile! A friend of Dirk's is a friend of yours! "Thank you! I try~" > Ooh he looks neat! Shakes the offered hand!!
Avery (PS/Sol/Dirk/Disci/CS)01/07/2019
> Smile a little. "Good to know you like her too."
♠ Leo ♠ (CA/AD/KV/PSI/ARQ)01/07/2019
"Of course, I would. I don't see why not." > You like the strong handshake! "Fricking fantastic. Thanks for keeping him safe out there"
🌺 Shadow 🌺 (Jade/Skylla)01/07/2019
> Handshakes are hugs for your hands! And you do give good hugs~ "I try my best to!~ I hope you're able to make sure Dirk rests his leg though."
Avery (PS/Sol/Dirk/Disci/CS)01/07/2019
> Chuckle awkwardly. > Well it's not like Arq didn't already know about the leg.
♠ Leo ♠ (CA/AD/KV/PSI/ARQ)01/07/2019
"Oh I will, I will command him to rest and dunk him to bed, and call him a noob if he doesn't"
Avery (PS/Sol/Dirk/Disci/CS)01/07/2019
> BI
🌺 Shadow 🌺 (Jade/Skylla)01/07/2019
> Giggles!!! "That sounds very effective! I leave Dirk in your capable hands then~"
Avery (PS/Sol/Dirk/Disci/CS)01/07/2019
> BI
♠ Leo ♠ (CA/AD/KV/PSI/ARQ)01/07/2019
"Thank you, do keep taking care of him from the dangers of the wild, he  might break if you look at him for too long tho"
Avery (PS/Sol/Dirk/Disci/CS)01/07/2019
> Pinch the bridge of your nose. "Alright that's enough. Time for Jade to go home."
🌺 Shadow 🌺 (Jade/Skylla)01/07/2019
> GIGGLES MORE!  > Sorry Dirk he makes a good point~ "I promise to do my best Sir~" "Aw alright fiiine~"
January 8, 2019
♠ Leo ♠ (CA/AD/KV/PSI/ARQ)01/08/2019
"Bro, you sure know how to be a party pooper. Anyway this was a pleasure Jade. I'll see you eventually."
Avery (PS/Sol/Dirk/Disci/CS)01/08/2019
> >B/
🌺 Shadow 🌺 (Jade/Skylla)01/08/2019
"Pleasures all mine Sir!~ Hope to see you soon then." > A wink n a smile Dirk's way "Sweet dreams Strider~"
Avery (PS/Sol/Dirk/Disci/CS)01/08/2019
> Smile in her direction. "See you around, Harley."
♠ Leo ♠ (CA/AD/KV/PSI/ARQ)01/08/2019
> Wave goodbye!
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royalrastafariannaynays · 7 years ago
Text
Laundry Pods (4/?)
continuation of my davekat merperson AU! content warnings are in the tags :)
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“Does it hurt?” Jade asks, worried. 
You can walk fine, now, but they found a chip broken off of your shoulder socket in a successive x-ray about a week ago. It had to be surgically removed, and that sucked. But it was a simpler surgery, so not too bad you guess. 
Your throat still hurts a bit when you breathe, and the neck strain hasn’t improved all the way. But your attending said that was normal. For now, at least. Naproxen was all they gave you for the pain, and strict instructions for bedrest, and a little pamphlet of physical therapy exercises. 
So you’ve got some papers and a sling over your shoulder and you’re staying in Hawaii, on Jade’s island, for the next couple of months. Maybe longer, who knows? You brought all of your things with you when you came here, except for some furniture, which you had moved into a storage unit just before you left your apartment. With John’s stuff. The storage unit is paid off for the next two years. 
Mom’s money. 
So you could stay here, for awhile. On this beautiful island.
It wouldn’t be so bad. 
After all, you don’t have a job back... “home”. You could clean up Jade’s house or do the laundry or weed her garden for her. 
She grows pineapples outdoors, here. 
“Yeah, of course it hurts,” you snap at Jade, as the pain spikes. Ow. 
She looks a little dreadful for a minute before straightening up, rolling her shoulders back, and fixing you with a glare. 
“I don’t deserve that, Dave,” she says. And.
Yeah. She doesn’t. 
You’re a miserable human being. Wouldn’t have been so bad if that fall killed you, huh? 
“My bad, man,” you mumble. 
Jade pats your shoulder. 
The sound of a slide guitar, and some of her Bon Iver-ass bullshit soft music, echoes from the basement. That’s where you were a minute ago, chilling in the dark and watching a movie on the projector she has set up down there. 
Trying to reach the TV antenna is what got your shoulder hurting. 
“You just need to heal,” she says. 
Two days ago, Jake left for his most recent expedition. He’ll be gone for a year or so. Rose left the day after, promising to return soon, but that she needs to speak with her editor and see her wife before Kanaya has to leave for the Big Fashion Season in Italy. 
“Maybe you could go out on the beach for a bit?” She suggests. “Dirk and Jane just got back from their jog.” 
That doesn’t sound too bad, but... 
Is she getting you to go somewhere where there are chaperones? 
So you make a face. 
“They’re gonna be doin yoga out there,” you say. Dirk and Jane, workout buddies. Roxy would have been jogging with them, but she won’t be coming this summer. Well, she did, but she had to leave already. Robotics conferences and government work and so on. 
She might be able to come out later. 
You miss Roxy. 
Jade squares you with a Look. 
Okay, you admittedly haven’t been outside lately. 
You could do with a walk. 
Thank GOD for spray-on sunscreen. 
It’s hard enough to get your tank top off without help, and your beach shorts on, but if you had to put on sunscreen manually without the use of your right hand? Jeeeeeesus. That would be beyond annoying. 
It smells a little artificial, though, you find. 
But eh. Keeps bugs off, too. 
The sand is warm under your feet as you walk along the little path to Jade’s lagoon. Yeah, her house has an entire lagoon all to itself. And not a particularly tiny one, either. It’s not big, either. 
Okay. It’s a small lagoon. 
Kinda like the one in that Ghibli movie with the pig. But yknow. Only in size. Not super high walls like that. Yeah.
You’re not the best at descriptions. Maybe it’s the pain meds. 
Dirk and Jane have some other soft acoustic shit playing as you walk out. When you pass them there, Jane is showing Dirk how to do the crane pose without falling. They say their hellos to you, and Dirk asks how you’re doing. 
You know Rose told him to watch you like a hawk, and prevent stupidity. And you know he agreed. 
You shrug Dirk off as much as you can with only one useful shoulder, and walk gingerly out to the beach.
The sand is still warm, even standing in shallow water. A crab scuttles across your toes, and you look out at the ocean. It’s so vast, and you’re so small. The line where it meets the blue, blue sky is almost invisible to your eyes. 
June, the nurse, said to take it easy. Even on your leg. So you decide on a short walk, out to where the lagoon spills into the sea at high tide. There’s always a flow there, minimal, and you know there are little tunnels that go in and out below the surface. But at the entrance there are a couple of tide pools. 
“I’m gonna go check out a starfish,” you call to Dirk, and you don’t wait for a response before you’re limping out to the land bridge. 
Maybe you should have brought your sketchbook. 
At the smallest tide pool, you sit, carefully. And you reach over with your good hand, and poke at a crusty little starfish. 
It doesn’t do anything except wiggle a little further out of your reach. 
Something sparkles in the sand, there, though. 
It’s... 
Glass?
It’s a pretty thick piece, and it’s bright red. 
It’s shaped into something with two loops, and two lines going off of it. Some kind of hippie horoscope shit. 
You pick it up, and admire the texture of it in your hands. Smooth, for the most part, and cold from the water. But warm on the top, from the sun. 
It’s etched with some symbols. You’re not sure what they are. 
More hippie horoscope shit. Probably.
At your curating job, you haven’t seen anything like it. Huh. Maybe a Lord of the Rings website could help you out. 
A cord is attached to it when you drag it from the water. 
Huh.  
Who wandered by Jade’s place at night or whatever? Or did it just wash up? 
Maybe a little animal got caught on it and brought it up. 
You pocket it, and poke at the starfish again. 
Prime entertainment. 
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moony-balloons · 7 years ago
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Oh hey yeah I was gonna make a “what is up with me lately” post so here it finally is! Under a cut bc I don’t know how long it’s gonna be.
So! Firstly, I have a job. I work full time as a cashier at a grocery store, a major chain one BUT it’s part of a smallish franchise owned by a dude who is very nice and community focused, and we’re treated very well so no complaints on that front. I didn’t -actually- want full time for “I have no energy as it is and will not get anything done towards finding a Degree Relevant job if I am spending literally all of my energy at my current job” but my parents were not real receptive to that? So when I was interviewing and the manager asked me if I wanted full time or part time I said I’d take whatever and they put me on as full time bc boy howdy do they need people. Also honestly tbh I don’t mind making that full-time dough, could use the money to build my savings back up and start paying down my student loans faster / buy myself some of the things I’ve been putting off for forever and a day bc “well it’s not ESSENTIAL and I don’t have a job so lol”. I’ve been there for around..... 6 weeks? 2 months? Somewhere in there, and the Exhaustion from working on my feet 8 hours a day every day is reducing as my body gets used to it so I may be able to start getting things done again, aside from the small organizational irl things I’ve been picking away at bc those just make my life and my brain and everything feel cleaner. Clean is good yknow? And my mom’s house is pretty cluttered (less cluttered than her parents admittedly so step in the right direction, but lordy) so wanting my room to at least be neat is nice.
But yeah, on the topic of getting things done for job searching? The troubles I’ve been having, as always, are that I feel like 1) I need to do Everything Right Now bc I want to get a job that utilizes my degree, but that is overwhelming, so I feel like 2) I should take things a bit at a time bc that is the solution to things being overwhelming but that is Not Good Enough Or Fast Enough bc I should be there Now so as a result of those two things clashing I often just end up doing nothing? Which is even worse than moving too slowly, but? With the fact that I don’t have a clearly quantifiable end point in mind with my “I gotta learn x, y and z languages/skills well enough to be able to get a job” goal, I always feel like I am wasting time when I chip away at it bc, oh, maybe THIS skill isn’t important and my time would be better spent learning THIS instead, or maybe no one even does things THIS way anymore and it’s dumb to even learn it bc I will have to learn a different way anyway. Or other such nonsense and basically what I am getting is that my attempts to learn these things keep failing in part bc I am too damn vague and I can’t feel like I am making progress towards my goal if I can’t quantify what my goal IS, or at what pace I “should” be moving towards it. So I plan to try and.... set things up more like as if I was in school? Like give myself deadlines and homework and reading assignments and shit lmao, and see if that works. I also have to remember what the therapist said when I was speaking to him a while ago when I was first starting medication, which was.... I was having this same issue, and he asks me why I feel like I’m not moving fast enough and it’s because I feel like more is expected of me, by both my family and by society in general, and he’s like well basically fuck what they think, you move at whatever pace you can (in much nicer terms obv lmao). And I gotta like, write that on my forehead in sharpie bc that is the thing to remember, getting there more slowly than someone else is fine if that is what I am capable of and it sure as shit beats giving up and never getting there at all.
But I did have a mental health slump recently bc, well, it doesn’t feel great to have a bachelor’s degree and still be doing retail stuff, and getting turned down by countless actual tech jobs in the meantime. Being rejected by the most recent one hurt the most because it was one of those “oh we’re looking for more of a personality fit than a skills fit!” type positions, and it was an internship (a new position they were still in the process of working out even what that entailed, but even so) and they liked my personality and invited me to take a skills test...... and I didn’t complete it in time, and they were basically like uh yeah we’re gonna pass. Like, not looking as much for a skills match but my skills disqualified me anyway. And then on top of that! The weekend before last I went to help my grandpa put in his new air conditioner (he still uses the kind you have to mount in a window) and he had a nice snide comment about “6 years at [school] and all you can say is, do you want fries with that” which, A, 4 and a half years, thanks, but also B, can you not??? He’s very much of the opinion that college is a waste of time and computers are on their way out and have overstayed their welcome and I should learn a SKILL (anything that doesn’t result in physically building something with your hands is not a skill in his book) bc only people with SKILLS are useful/valuable/etc. I know that he’s wrong about that and that his “if it wouldn’t help you in the apocalypse then it’s dumb and not worth knowing” attitude is not anywhere near the norm, but the fact that it echoes the insecurities I already have about myself re: being dumb and useless just made it REALLY hit home. Bc like...... idk. I can combat my own bad things I think about myself with, well yeah, you have depression and are definitely not as bad as you think you are, you’re just looking at yourself with poop-tinted glasses bc mental illness. But if someone ELSE says it, well, clearly they must be right! Which is dumb af but that’s what my brain does. BUT after spending time with my very pissy grandpa I went over to my dad’s house and got to pet my dog a lot and Dad made burgers on the grill which was excellent (my stepdad considers himself a grillmaster but honestly tbh keep this a goddamn secret but I like my dad’s burgers better) and they showed me the house they bought, which has 4 bedrooms and would theoretically have space for me to stay with them should I ever need it, unlike their current house which is small af and causes some inconveniences if I end up having to stay the night lol. Also the new house has a fireplace and a loft area above the living room which I am SO sure their cats are gonna love.
Artwise I’m in a similar spot to where I am career-wise, which is “I would love to do a fancy finished detailed thing but I definitely won’t have the energy to actually do it to my satisfaction so I should work on just practicing little things but that is not good enough and I have to be able to do awesome cool things right now” and the fact that I don’t have a good, comfortable drawing space doesn’t help. I keep meaning to work on it and I do believe that in bits and pieces, I will, it’s just one of those things where I want to draw and then if I do start, I immediately hate it and want to stop, and lately haven’t had the energy to push through it. XD Just weh.
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