#ANYWAY. this was. an adventure to write. i'm so glad it's finished
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zukkaoru · 6 months ago
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where i am going (is right where i am)
“You want to pretend we’re dating.” “Exactly!” Ranpo claps their hands together. “We’ll go all out—I’m talking making out during office hours, disappearing to the bathroom together, calling each other stupid pet names, refusing to be separated when we don’t want to do work. Just imagine how everyone will react!” Dazai considers this. He does rather enjoy annoying his coworkers—Kunikida especially. And no one in the office will be more perturbed by Dazai and Ranpo suddenly being an obnoxious couple. It’ll make Atsushi squirm. Sigma and Tanizaki will try to hide their discomfort until it eventually turns to annoyance, which will be hilarious. Naomi will just laugh at everyone. Plus it’ll catch Chuuya so far off guard they won’t even know what hit them. It’s the perfect plan. “Okay,” Dazai agrees. “Let’s do it.”
or: dazai kills a man, gets a boyfriend, has a gender crisis, confronts his own humanity, and starts to heal. not necessarily in that order.
đŸŒ± 25.8k words || souheki / daran / ranzai đŸŒ± post-doa arc + fake dating
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ethanmaldridge · 4 months ago
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Just finished Deephaven and I wanted to say I love how natural the queerness in it is, even though it's not a love story. I don't find a lot of queer books that aren't romance--not to say that queer romances are bad or anything--and it's nice to read a book with an NB person (like me! :) ) as the lead having their own adventure unrelated to their queerness. Probably similar to how girls feel when the fantasy novel has a female lead instead of a male, feeling happiness at the representation and deeper connection to the lead, I am trying to say.
As someone in a household that's not entirely accepting of those things, reading a book where the main character is called they/them throughout with no transphobia was really comforting in a way. How people say books transport us to another world, in the world of Deephaven I feel safe (about my gender, I mean, maybe not so much about the danger of the east wing).
Anyways. All I am trying to say is thank you for the NB representation and I liked reading a mystery involving queer characters.
This note means so much, thank you!!! I'm always so glad and honored to hear when my books have provided some escape or comfort. I always try to write with myself as a kid in mind, when I was scared and closeted and in a community that wasn't always safe for me. Those feelings exist at any stage, and it's a delight to be able to tell stories that sometimes help.
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buggyboba · 27 days ago
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✩ October 17th | Shower Sex
AN 𓏧
↳ ○ | We almost didn't make it folks, I just finished writing this, my ADHD was really bad here, there was a lot of fluff, and I had to remind myself I was writing filth. But listen fourteen deserves fluff, anyone who doesn't agree, well I'm sorry it's to the vortex with you...straight to time vortex jail. SMUT MDNI
SUMMARY𓏧
↳ ○ Domestic life comes with domestic things, and sometimes dangerous shower sex is just what is needed to make a day more exciting.
PAIRING𓏧
↳ ○ Fourteenth Doctor x F!Reader
TW𓏧
↳ ○ Established relationship/companion. Fingering, P in V unprotected sex, back shots. Longish foreplay.
WORD COUNT𓏧
↳ ○ 1700
A03 lINK𓏧
↳ ○ x
MASTERLIST LINK𓏧
↳ ○ x
Retiring had been hard on him; you knew that. Of course, there were still your 'secret’ adventures; sometimes you even took Rose along; it was a shared secret. You, The Doctor, his niece—no, your niece too—you both had been seeing each other long enough, even if it was off and on and had odd periods in between. You two got rather serious when he decided to retire, to heal, to live a life that wasn’t always running. You were happy you got to be a part of it, someone that he could talk to about past events because you had been a companion for a long while now. You had seen him through four faces now; this one was a repeat; you had always been fond of it, and though you knew it didn’t come back because of you, you were glad that it did. You had been gathering clothing to go take a shower; you could feel his gaze on you. 
“Do you want to join me?” You asked and laughed a bit. He got that big grin you adored moving from his lying position on the bed; he moved to follow you into the bathroom. “You big puppy, you know you could just join me; you don’t have to wait for me to ask.”
"Yes, well, what if you didn’t want shower company? Hm? What if you decided you wanted to get squeaky clean all alone? What if you weren’t in the mood to have me there? I would rather have permission than to assume.” He said, wrapping an arm around your shoulder before he kissed your temple. “Besides, having you invite me is one of my favorite things; it means you don’t want to keep your hands to yourself.” He grinned, pulling at your shirt’s collar a bit, before kissing your cheek, moving into the bathroom, and running the water to the temperature you liked. You took the opportunity to slip out of the clothing you had been wearing all day. You rolled your head so your neck would pop. He watched you closely, moving his hands across your now-bare back. He let his fingers massage into your muscles, working away tension. You had started to temp for UNIT, a 'consultant'; it was a fancy way of saying secretary until there was a problem and the doctor ignored their call. It was fine work, paid well, and you got to hang out with Donna and Rose a lot more at work, even meeting the bi-regenerated doctor, the one that he would become eventually; maybe it was complicated. It didn’t matter right now anyway; you had your doctor to worry about, to pay attention to, to help heal. 
His fingers worked, and you felt yourself wanting to melt back against him. His hand slid up your shoulder blade to the crook of your neck, working there and across the back of your neck. Before his fingers slid around to hold your throat, there was no force behind it as he kissed from your shoulder up to your jaw, kissing and sucking where your jaw met your neck. You made a soft sound, his other arm wrapped around your waist, drawing you back against him as he kissed and sucked a deep mark into your skin. Your eyes fluttered shut for a moment as you relaxed into his affection; his fingers at your waist dragged over your stomach down towards your thigh and back up to your hip. He nipped you suddenly, drawing a surprised sound from your throat.
“Water should be warm enough.” He muttered against your skin, kissing where he had just bit before letting you go. You almost whined at the lack of his touch suddenly. You frowned at him pouting pathetically. As you got into the shower, the warm water washed over you, and you made a pleased sound at the way it warmed your aching body. You looked over at him as he undressed, moving to get into the water behind you. He ran his fingers through your hair, pulling some tangles free before he grabbed your shampoo and poured some in his palm, lathering it up a bit before pulling it through your hair. He kissed your shoulder a bit. He was thoughtful; he definitely showed his love with acts of service. You closed your eyes as he let his nails scratch your scalp lightly; you could melt right there. 
You smiled as he let his hands fall to trail down your arms; he pushed you forward a bit so he could rinse your hair. After the soap was out, you turned, wrapping your arms around the back of his neck. You leaned up to kiss him. His hands moved to settle on your hips, pulling you closer; your hands trailed over his shoulders and then down his chest, settling on his stomach right above his pelvis. As you kissed, his tongue lapped against your lower lip, begging for entrance, and you obliged, parting your lips. His tongue slipped into your mouth, and you made a soft sound, your tongue eager to meet his. His fingers pressed into the flesh of your hips a bit more, you savored the feeling of the kiss, he carefully moved to turn you both around so he could press your back against the back wall of the shower, pressing his body against yours, one hand up your side and across your arm lifting it above your head as he broke the kiss, attaching his mouth to your neck again, you made a little sound again and arched against him a bit, feeling his hardened length against your stomach, you let a playful breathless giggle escape. 
He grinned against your neck and let his hand that was holding your wrist above you move back down slowly, grazing over your stomach, and further down, his fingertips traced over your mound before slipping through your folds, teasing you, reveling in the soft mewling sound that came from your throat. His long fingers rubbed, his middle finger pressed into you, his pointer pressing against your clit before rubbing it. When he pulled a beautiful groan from your lips, he slid his pointer finger down to press it into you, starting to thrust his fingers. You felt your back lean against the wall more, your hands splayed against the cool tile of the shower. "Mmf.” You sounded softly, “God.” You breathed, your hips rocking forward. He let his fingers move faster, feeling how your walls clenched and flexed. He let his thumb move to rub slow circles against your clit.
“Feel good?” He breathed in your ear, and you nodded quickly. He continued to kiss you again briefly before he let his other hand move down to stroke himself a few times. “Do you want to..." He looked at you with those puppy dog eyes you loved; you nodded again, and he pulled his fingers out of you, bringing them up to his fingers to lick your arousal off of them. He moved to step back, hissing as he felt your fingers trail up his length. He leaned forward to kiss you again. He savored moments like this, moments where it was just you and him, where the universe melted away and your focus was solely on each other. He pulled away, “Turn around.” He breathed out. You nodded and did as he asked, turning to face the wall. You bent some, your ass pushed out, and he moved behind you, his hand gripping your hip as his other hand reached down to reposition your leg some.
He moved, lining up with your dripping hole, gripping the base of his cock. He pushed slowly into you, inch by inch until he was fully in you. His hand moved to rub up your ass, gripping it before he started to drag back out slowly. Your fingers curled against the wall as you whined, trying to follow; you didn’t want him out of you. You made a strangled sound as he pushed back in rougher this time before he set a slow pace, wanting to take his time, wanting to enjoy this moment with you. His head dipped down to kiss the back of your neck, growling out a moan as he felt you flexing around him, gripping and milking him. His hips grinding and rocking against your ass as he let his hand trail up your side up your chest and his fingers wrapped around your throat pulling you against his chest as he thrust, his hand that had been on your hip moved to wrap around your waist.
You could feel his dual hearts thudding against his chest and against your back as you groaned out, your hands moving to hold onto his arms, your thoughts fogged with pleasure, and you could only whine out his name and soft curses as he drew you closer to your orgasm. The air was heavier due to the humidity from the hot shower that you had remembered thanks to the water pattering against his back and against you, and the wall and floor—at least clean up would be quick and easy. Your knees felt weaker as your body hurtled towards release. He grunted out as he moved, wanting to make sure you had come before him. He felt the way you shook against him, listened to your breathing, and how your heart beat; he knew your body as well as his own by now. You were close. “It’s okay, star; you can let go, just feel it,” he breathed into your ear as you felt your hips give a weak jerk, and you panted out a whine. 
You couldn’t hold it anymore, and you groaned out your nickname for him as you writhed your pleasure spilling over, and you clenched against him, cumming around his cock. He groaned out and held you against him, slowly rolling his hips through your orgasm. He felt the pressure at the base of his spine, how his cock twitched. He moved, pulling out, his cock rubbing against your ass and back until he gripped it, pumping it. Until hot threads of cum painted your lower back, he panted and let his head lay against the back of your shoulder, kissing the skin there as he started to come down. You felt good, Hazy. He moved after a moment, kissing across your back as he moved to wash you up from your time together. He made sure to be slow and gentle as he washed you up, making sure to give you plenty of kisses and asking if you were hungry after the shower was done. You loved this funky little alien, and you hoped he knew that you were in it for the long haul.
★𓏧 𓏧 𓏧★ 𓏧 𓏧 𓏧★
Taglist𓏧 ↳ ○ @bees-fart-too , @bakusquadobsessed , @anastasa-mslfedit , @cabinedepapel , @asteria237 , @suckerforcate , @bingewatchingmylifegoby , @toastvogel , @starbucks-06 If you want to be added to the rest here is the l x
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melonminnie · 2 years ago
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Hello! I'm back, hehehe well I came to ask you something, would you be willing to write for action manhwas? Sorry is that I am addicted to them, blame daddy sung jinwoo.
Leaving the topic, can I have more yandere platonic but this time from Who made me a princess? I have a scenario, maybe the reader was a girl fed up with her life, so you know, she killed herself and ended up opening her eyes in this manhwa and worst of all, she is a rejected daughter of claude.
So in order to survive, she hides from him, contrary to what Atty would do, she decides she doesn't want his attention. She already suffered a lot in her other life from being ignored and crushed by others, as if her feelings were nothing more than garbage and dog poop. That's why this time he doesn't even try, like have you seen the female leads in almost every manhwa quwrer to live and shit? Well, our dear reader DOES NOT WANT TO LIVE, she is tired and fed up with everything.
But imagine if, by chance, an old diary is found in an abandoned library in the ruby palace (forgot to say, but this is 4 years before the initial story, so my reader is 7 at the time) going back to the diary, she He finds it and it turns out that it is magical. So somehow he travels to the past through this book and without thinking he wanders through the old palace finding Claude crying as a child. Because the reader doesn't give a damn about her life, she begins to establish a friendship because if she was already here, why waste this opportunity? he also hates the adult claude ironically he is his dad.
All that shit from his childhood happens and for 4 years the reader goes back and forth from the past to the future, we reach the point where the adult claude remembers that girl a lot and becomes obsessed with finding her since she was his emotional support. Sorry for all that stuff, now imagine that the plot begins and our reader knows it, that's why she decides to run away taking some money (for some reason she became friends with Felix and he gave her 500 gold coins so she can run away) Like reader hates attention, leaves the palace and lives in a cabin, now we move on to claude still having those dreams with that little girl who was becoming a woman, this was always platonic but he is obsessed with finding her, he promised as a child to return all his care and comfort.
She's the only one who knows him best, but we know the reader doesn't care about anyone and just wants to die in a quiet place.
Annnd, you can develop this better, in the end I would like claude to find out that his daughter has always been his best friend in some way and end up locking her up to prevent her from leaving again. I do not know
And I leave you a gift again, hehehe I edited it for a fanfic that I will never finish or publish
(PS: I traced the lineart of the official art, but the coloring is mine and it is based on that scene, this is already old so it has errors)
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YAN! CLAUDE X DAUGHTER! READER (platonic)
-Hihi I’m glad you’re back!! Unfortunately I doubt I’ll be writing for adventure manhwa at the moment sense I only read romance at the moment but maybe in the future! Reader has the same appearance as athy, fyi your art always amazes me!! Thank you for requesting mwah đŸ«¶đŸ«¶
WARNING EXTREME WARNING CONTAINS SUICIDE DO NOT CONTINUE READING IF THIS MAKES YOU UNCOMFORTABLE this is also extremely confusing I tried making it sound normal đŸ«¶đŸ«¶đŸ«¶
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“Why would she want to die?” Asked one of the dead girls friends, “dunno she had everything yet she became greedy” said the other, standing in front her grave, if the girl was still alive she would’ve choked her, only a pathetic person would be able to make fun of a person in-front their own grave.
Well it’s not like she heard it anyway, and frankly if she did at the moment she wouldn’t care, “I mean she was pathetic with her reincarnation thing and reading fake stuff about it” the friend continued her rant, As she woke up in a non existent body in one of the first novels she’d ever read, but knowing where she was and who’s daughter she was.
To tell the truth, she had reincarnated as the non existent oldest daughter of claude de Alger obelia, the same person who almost drowned his daughter the first he hung around with her, the same person who also killed said daughter in her point of view before she reincarnated, Now she didn’t want the same path, of course she didn’t do the same thing as athanansia did with the rubys, money and gold.
Instead she opted to just hiding away from everyone, it was almost like she was purposely isolating herself, but the maids took it as a joke as she was still a young kid, almost anytime she tired hiding away, one of the maids would find her and then take her back to her room, So she started exploring the entirety of the ruby palace, from up to bottom every bedroom and bathroom.
So of course she soon found the abandoned library, sure it was hard to open the door, but she managed!.
Upon entering said library, it was clear it hadn’t been touched nor used for a very long time, as she took steps her shoes would leave footprints from the dust on the floor, every book she touched had collected dust, While looking around her eyes seemed to wander to a nearly unheard of twinkling sound coming, it sounded sweet almost as if it was luring her in, she searched everywhere to find the source of the sound, which she did!.
It was a old diary frankly she didn’t know it was one till she opened it and read the contents of it, it didnt have a label only twinkling stars surrounding it, of course as a curious 7 year old who can read, she decided to read it.
At first it was boring, the handwriting was messy, as if a child was writing it, it started as writing about what they did throughout the day, it was clear that this diary belonged to someone who had a high noble status.
Soon the soft twinkling noises became cackling noises, it was extremely loud to her ears,but she nonetheless continued, flipping it till she reached a point where the cackling noises sounded so loud that it resembled gun noises, she slowly covered her ears and tried running away from the book.
But she couldn’t, why?, the dust had become fog, just slightly more browner, so with her still covering her ears, coughing sounds erupted from her throat, her eyes becoming watery so she had to close them, she kneeled to the floor continuously coughing as the dust began entering her nose.
Her hands quickly moved from her ears, to her mouth and nose, once everything had settled, and the blonde could finally breathe properly, she slowly opened her eyes, they were met with greenery instead of a dusty library, now this was confusing, as she knew she didn’t walk out of the library.
Because of course she couldn’t, and to her knowledge she didn’t inherit any magical powers, of course it no longer looked like she was in ruby palace, this place was way to extravagant to ruby palace!.
Now she couldn’t go back unless she finds out a way, so she decided to wander around for a bit!.
The blonde haired girl was getting tired, usually she would walk longer, but her legs were giving out, she of course was scared of getting noticed by who ever owns or works here, she’d already worked so hard to not die nor meet any important character, why does she need to die now after being alive for 7 years?.
So she opted to sitting behind a tree hiding her body from everyone, “I’ll just sit here till I gain my strength back!” She thought, she’d lived quietly her entire life, of course this would’ve been easy.
If she wasn’t a noisy person, not even a minute had passed before she started hearing hiccuping noises, it sounded like a boy was crying, whether she wanted to know who was crying or didn’t, it see,ed like her body was punishing her as it started moving by itself to the crying sounds.
There was a boy who was older then her maybe 10?, his appearance matched Claude’s appearance exactly!, but then there was his brother, who looked the same, the girl was standing behind him obviously just starring at him, of course he felt a sudden stare on him, so to his surprise he finds a tiny girl with blue eyes gawking at him.
“What are you staring at?!” He asked slightly embarrassed that someone had caught him crying his eyes out, “Well obviously you your the only person here!” She answered back deciding to sit next to him, “So what where you crying about also what’s your name!” She asked not really caring about what he was crying about, wanting to find out his name only.
“Claude” he mumbled turning his head the other way to whip his tears away, “O-oh” frantically she was quite disappointed, but if this was her hill to die on so be it!, she died once she wouldn’t be scared of facing death again right?, “Well?, aren’t you going to tell me your name” he demanded, “Name..” she answered.
“Then claude, do you want to be my friend?” She extended her hand to his smiling, “W-what do you know who you want to be friends with?” He asked, “yes I do know so do you or do you not?” She asked again, clearly nervous of getting rejected again by the same man who rejected her as a grown adult, being friends with your dad isn’t the best especially when you’ve never personally known him.
“Fine!” He accepted the seven year olds request shaking her hand in confirmation.
“Great” she whispered smiling happily.
“Great..” he said glancing at her hand then eyes.
Of course she found out that by simply it turning night she would return to her original world, the world where the only people who knew of her existence were the maids and lowly knights assigned to the ruby palace, It was good opportunity for the girl cause returning from both worlds affects the timeline greatly, when she’d go to child claude and return at night, It would also become night.
Which meant the maids could leave her alone for days at times, so that’s how the cycle continued, of course every time she returned claude would age up continuously he’d age up a lot in the four years she’d been with him.
In those four years, claude had told her about every aspect of his life, the way his step mother treated him, his brother, family issues, favorite food, Felix, claude slowly realized he’d grown a fond of his friend, he felt like she was a mini version of him, he didn’t notice the way she still looked younger while he looked older, he’d never notice that.
At some point the blonde haired girl knew she needed to stop being around him, it was so that so she doesn’t affect the story line, she’d never want that of course, and so when y/n turned 11, she’d known she’d need to stop, as the storyline was so close to happening, she slowly forced herself to forget she’d ever meet her father as a kid, she knew she needed to stop when he mentioned that his newborn daughter looked like a split image of her.
Now claude would never forget about the friend he made in the garden, how could he?, the way he met her to him was fascinating, he was determined to find her, As the now older man ran a hand threw his hair, he didn’t remember much of you, he remembered how you looked like, he’d know you if he spotted you anywhere, but he just can’t seem to find you anywhere?.
Were you a fairy or an angel?, or were you the ghost of his daughter from another life haunting him as a child.
“Felix!!” The young girl yelled running up to the red haired man, “y/n how are you?” He asked bowing to her, Felix never met you as a child he’d found you behind a tree asleep and took you back when you were eight, ever since he’d been giving you gold to help you escape, as he knew you’d never want to meet your oh so scary dad that you accidentally met when he was a kid.
He just presumed you’d heard rumors about how he killed his own lover afterbirth alongside all his concubines in the palace you’d been at your entire life.
“This time” she breathed heavily as she’d been running, “give me 500 gold please” the blonde begged clasping her hands together mustering the cutest face she could pull off, the red head chuckled softly before handing you 300, “hey! I said 500 not 300”
“Y/n come on what do you need 500 for?”
“Why are you asking please just give it promise you won’t ever see me again” she pleaded with him, “fine don’t let anyone find out though” , he sighed before handing an extra 200.
“Of course I won’t!” The girl replied before running away waving him off with a smile.
“His majesty must never find out..” he mutter returning back to his duties or precisely to Claude’s office.
Y/n kept her promise, she had snuck out in the middle of the night leaving almost everything behind except things she held dearly, and had bought a cabin far away from the capital.
As the years passed by y/n turned 22, it had been a long time sense she’d seen Claude, she’d heard of him of course and her sister athanasia, sense the two had a huge age gap, her younger sister had turned 15 recently, she’d wished she could’ve celebrated with her but she knew if she ever went back there something she’d never want to happen will happen.
Claude had frequent dreams of his childhood friend turning older, claude was forgetting her appearance, it was irritating to him, So the man knew that she wasn’t hiding in the capital she was on the outskirts of it.
He’d heard her say she’d hope to get a cabin on the outskirts of the capital in one of his dreams, Felix knew what was happening to claude wasn’t great he’d tried to stop him multiple times, “are you telling me what I can and can’t do?” Claude asked Felix as the redhead had held his body forbidding him from escaping.
“Your majesty your losing your mind over a nonexistent person” Felix yelled at him, “nonexistent? Felix do you know what the fuck your telling me right now?” The man replied, he cursed him out to no end that night, Felix was getting tired of it, the emperor was going insane over his daughter whom he hadn’t talked nor seen for 22 years, yet now he wanted to talk to her?.
Felix knew where you lived as you made the purchase with his money and he got mail saying he bought a cabin, he threw it out not caring what you did with the money.
Claude was smiling manically the day he knew where you lived, “your highness are you sick?” Felix asked, “No why would you ask that” he replied leaning his head on his hand starring at the paperwork.
Of course, claude knew who you were now, that you were his daughter, that you were the same person who he had met as a desperate kid with no friends.
Claude’s obsession was growing out of proportion, when claude found out where his precious daughter was, he stormed over there an hour later, Felix tried everything possible in his ability to stop him.But he couldn’t.
In those years that you had lived in the cabin your only thought, that was to die, but you couldn’t. You lived in a cabin for no reason, the purpose you couldn’t complete anymore.
While you were asleep, you heard a huge bang at you door, quickly getting up, she opened the door, revealing a tall male with blonde hair and diamond like blue eyes.
Claude starred at his daughter, daggers almost, “I’ve finally found you y/n” he smiled, it was terrifying, how did he find you?, how did he even know who you are, this was absolute hell, the girl tried shutting the door but his grip was stronger then hers, “you can’t run away from now” he said “my daughter” he pushed. The door open and pulled her into a one sided hug.
It was terrifying being held by the same man whom you have been trying to avoid for the past 22 years of your life, he found you like it was nothing, the way he was hugging you was almost bone crushing.
He swiftly knocked you out, knowing the moment he left go of you you’d try to escape.
And he’d never ever let you leave his side ever again, you’ll be forced with the title of the princess whether you like it or not.
Befriending claude de Alger obelia was the worst mistake you’d ever made.
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On a side note my request are always open! I don’t bite đŸ«¶
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koko-heads · 1 year ago
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i just finished rain code and i think i might cry (spoilers ahead!!)
first of all
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I CALLED IT !!!!! I CALLED IT I CALLED IT I CALLED IT I CALLED IT I FUCKING CALLED IT i knew yuma number one and makoto were all connected EVER SINCE yuma and makoto first met and the latter joked abt being number one's son then when yuma left and makoto said "so that's my..." the gears were turning in my head
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these shots just go hard no opinion
i was like so close to sobbing when yuma was abt to sacrifice himself but he realised he needed to protect the ppl he loved and cared about + I KNEW MAKOTO WAS A WELL-INTENTIONED EXTREMIST i would've been on his side anyway bc he's so mwah
OH AND WHEN YUMA AND SHINIGAMI SEPARATED LIKE NEOOOOOWWWWW all of a sudden i wanted to apologise for ever calling her annoying those two leaving each other was a punch to the gut but AT LEAST!!! yuma's becoming a detective on his own đŸ„č
the epilogue made me choke up,,, the others leaving the headquarters,,,, saying goodbye to yakou,,, when they all said goodbye to kurumi i was THIS đŸ€đŸŸ close to crying + the fact yuma was almost never mentioned until towards the end like THATS MY MAN!!! SAY HIS NAME
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number one! yuma was kinda.... idk đŸ˜”â€đŸ’«
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VIVIAAAAAAAA yeah i cried he's so lovely i'll miss him forever
AND THE ENDING!!!!! i know sequelbait when i see it there's no way we're leaving yuma behind that quickly
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SHARA BRIANNA SUZIE LAURA LIZZIE DOROTHY EDWARD SEAN JANICE MATT ERICA????? THEY GOT THE WHOLE GANG OMG
in conclusion: an absolutely stunning whirlwind adventure of a game that actually had me on the edge of my seat; the mysteries were thrilling, the humour was top-tier and the character writing was truly excellent. i'm just glad my big four (yuma, desuhiko, halara and vivia) survived đŸ™đŸŸ
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terresdebrume · 4 months ago
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Messrs Payne and Rowland's Adventuring Agency pt 12
Because I decided to go out for breakfast + writing and I'm not at a point in my life where I feel confident working on smut in public xD
"Young Crystal was expressing her shock at my lack of knowledge regarding combat magic," Mr. Payne says in that prim tone of his while Crystal rolls her eyes.
To her surprise, instead of agreeing with her or saying something to his partner, Charles blinks.
"Why would he bother with that?" He asks, apparently completely genuine. "That's what I'm for, innit?"
Mr. Payne's expression takes a painfully smug turn, and Crystal would sigh at him for it except at that point Charles puts a pair of reins in her hand, and she's faced with and admittedly beautiful horse head way too close to her own for comfort. Right. The Horseriding bit. Time to put Charles and Mr. Payne's theory to the test, then. Reluctantly, Crystal steps to the left flank of the horse, and takes a look at the saddle and stirrups. They're way too high for her as they are, and she doesn't want to risk jumping for fear of hurting the poor animal, so she lowers the stirrup as far as it'll go, hoist herself up with her arms, and then struggles until she's settled in the saddle, feeling weirdly slippery.
"You'll have to ride astride," Mr. Payne says with a rise of his eyebrow. "Suits of armor are not suited to riding sidesaddle."
"Neither is that saddle, for that matter," Charles adds. "And sidesaddle is a stupid way to ride, anyway."
With heated cheeks, Crystal takes her right leg out of its bend position and settles her foot in the stirrup, then leans aside when Mr. Paybe steps up to the horse and adjusts the other stirrup back to the correct height for her.
"Well," he says while Charles mounts his own horse, "we'll have to figure out how to get you up in the saddle faster, but I do believe our theory was correct. Give it a press of your heels."
Crystal does, and the horse starts off at a slow pace that she's glad to find manageable. Behind her, she hears Charles and Mr. Payne get their own horses in motion, then Mr. Payne overtakes her, and they're finally on their way to Crystal's first attempt at adventuring. It's funny, because she has no memory of her life before Charles and Mr. Payne found her, yet there's something in her that sings at the prospect, like it's been stiffled before and is finally being let free. She's not sure if it's the magic she apparently has or a result of some other circumstance she won't know until she finds her memories again, but she does know the prospect of even a short mission is... exilarating. She barely manages to contain herself until they're out of the city gates before she urges her horse into a gallop.
"Young Crystal!" she hears Mr. Payne protest, but she's going too fast to catch the rest of it, and even if she could she doesn't want to.
The the wind in her hair makes her feel like she could take flight, the movement of the horse's back under her teeming with power and as natural as breathing and, oh, Mr. Payne was more correct than he thought: Crystal doesn't just know what to do, she is good at it! With a shout, she urges her horse faster on the wide road, nothing but fields and then grass about as far as the eye can see, and she laughs when hoofbeats catch up with her, keep pace with her, then overtakes her, Mr. Payne's gray robes floating in the wind behind him. Crystal whoops again and presses her legs around the horse's flank, delighted when it speeds up again. She leans against its neck as low as her amor allows her to, setting her sights on a tree further down the way that will serve as a finish line as well as anything.
"Race you to the tree!" She calls out to Mr. Payne, and watches him make himself smaller in the saddle, evidently taking her up on the challenge.
They race along the road in a thunder, wind whipping at Crystal's cheeks and stinging in her eyes, her blood racing with the thrill of the chase, the clangs of her armor like drums in her ears. She manages to catch up to Mr. Payne's horse, keeping abreast of him and grinning triumphantly when he turns around to shoot her a surprised look, then swearing when he urges his horse faster. Crystal hisses between her teeth, then leans further onto her horse's neck and yells:
"Win me that race and I'll get you more carrots than you can eat!"
"You got it boss!" the horse says, and Crystal is so surprised the burst of speed the horse puts on throws her clean off the saddle.
She manages to cover her head with her arms by sheer miracle, but the fall drives the air out of her lungs and scrambles her mind with pain, leaves her winded and gasping on the trembling ground even as someone yells and comes to a stop next to her. She's pushing herself up on her arms when someone catches her shoulders and Charles' worried voice is in her ear:
"Crystal," he says with the tone of someone who's called her name before, "Crystal, can you hear me?"
"I'm fine," she says reflexively, vaguely aware of Mr. Payne coming back to them with both of their horses in hand. Charles is trying to catch her eyes, but she turns to her horse instead and points at it: "You speak!"
"Obviously," Mr. Payne says, "honestly, taking a tumble shouldn't-"
"Not you!" Crystal snaps at him, "You! You speak!"
"Yeah?" The horse says. "We all do, you know."
"You all--" Crystal turns to Charles, feeling more than a little crazed: "Did you know this?"
"I don't understand when you whiny at me," Charles says, something like relief in his eyes. "Are you speaking to the horse?"
"Yes!" Crystal says, finger still pointing at the horse. "It said--it said--"
"Hey, boss, do I still get the carrots? I won the race--"
"You fucking bit me, you fucker," says Mr. Payne's horse in a much deeper voice.
"Well yeah but she didn't say not to, and it's not my fault she fell down."
"You speak," Crystal repeats, hearing the faintness of her voice without being able to stop it.
"Oh great," says a light, younger sounding voice from behind her, "Good job Goncho, you brained her."
"I'm not--" Crystal protests, breathless, "horses don't speak!"
"All beasts speak, you ninny," says Charles' horse with a clear snort, "you bipeds just don't take the time to listen."
"Hey don't insult her!" Goncho says, "She promised me carrots!"
"For fuck's sake Goncho, not everything is about carrots. She's hurt!"
"She's fine," says Charles horse in an exasperated tone. "Look, she's not even bleeding. Come on, get up!"
"Hey, woah!" Charles says when his horse steps in front of him to bump at Crystal's torso.
"Up!" The horse continues, ignoring the way Charles tries to hold it back, "Up, I said! The more time you keep us here, the longer before I get back to my stable."
Goncho and the other horse let out long exclamations of protest and start heckling Charles' horse, their words turning back to annoyed whinnies and huffs in the time it takes Crystal to get back to her feet. She sways a bit, but Charles' hand steadies her quickly. When Crystal turns to him, he looks like he's trying not to laugh.
"They were speaking!" Crystal says, "You heard them, right? The horses?"
"Of course not," Mr. Payne says with clear impatience. Crystal turns around, ready to tell him where he can shove his dismissal, when he adds: "The magic was only on you. All we heard were horse sounds." He pauses, glancing at Charles, and then his lips curve into something that looks like it wants to be a smile. "I must admit the sight of you whinnying was quite entertaining."
"I didn't whinny!" Crystal protests, which is apparently exactly what Charles was waiting for to start laughing.
"You did," he says, voice trembling with the effort of pushing through his chuckles. "You make very funny faces when you're speaking horse."
"I didn't--"
"Oh, be grateful," Mr. Payne cuts off, not as harshly as he could, "now we know one thing your magic does, even if it isn't quite helpful in combat. Now, if you're quite alright, get back in the saddle, will you? Going full speed the whole time is not a good idea, but we do not want to keep young Rebecca waiting too long."
Crystal gets back in the saddle.
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sunshinebarbarian · 4 months ago
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Hello!! You can call me Pigeon! I'm 23F, from Portugal. I'm making this long ass post to give a little background information about the blog. I'm usually not into games like BG3, so I was a little late to the party, but boy am I glad to have arrived.
Click here to see the list of what I've already posted <3
I'm also posting on AO3!
One of my best friends kept talking to me about the game for YEARS and at some point last month Instagram decided to start recommending me fan edits of Astarion (which is funny because when she first asked me years ago who I'd pick, I very decidedly said Karlach) so I caved, and asked her to let me borrow it from her. When I was about 80 hours in, I broke and actually bought the game, because her account was being used and I didn't want to wait to continue my playthrough.
Neither of us expected me to get as much into the game as I did. Seriously. There's like 12 pages of screenshots I sent on discord of my own gameplay (a lot of it is Sol and Astarion kissing, oops), not to mention the unholy amount of reels and videos related to the game that we send each other.
Anyway, after about 180 hours (if you don't count the hours lost when I fucked up and had to reload the game) I finished the story, and proceeded to go cry in the corner. Instagram once again came to the rescue, when I started seeing posts from @meanbossart and I actually got obsessed with the way he draws his characters. I'd ride his dudrow to the Feywild and back if I had the chance. I'm not much of a visual artist, but I always loved writing, so I started writing Sol's adventures, because I was absolutely not ready to say goodbye to her (we spent over a month together! that's longer than some of my relationships). I'm doing it for myself, but I figured someone out there might enjoy it too, so I'm posting it. Plus this way I can save it more neatly than if I just keep using the notes app on my phone. I'm not new to Tumblr exactly, but I have never used an account for more than just snooping for particular posts. There's also AO3, but frankly that website confuses me and intimidates me.
Now, about Sol, and her story: I'm starting it pre nautiloid abduction, and will follow the choices that I made during the gameplay. I'm going to add some filling, to flesh out her character and her relationships with the whole gang, as well as just to give uniqueness to her story (otherwise you could just. play the game. and it'd be the same thing.). When I was creating Sol, I decided that I would play her as myself, making the choices that I would make, doing the things that I would do, so, the filling will be game/lore accurate still, and it will be based on my reactions and thoughts about game events. Luckily I have twelve pages of screenshots and a lot of messages to guide me. Once the game story is finished, I have ideas for how things will continue, because I refuse to let certain things remain the way they are, and I have attachment issues.
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unniekiwi · 2 years ago
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đ—đ—¶đ—ș đ—›đ—źđ˜„đ—žđ—¶đ—»đ˜€ 𝘅 𝗚𝗡! đ—„đ—Čđ—źđ—±đ—Č𝗿. đ—–đ—ąđ— đ—™đ—ąđ—„đ—§đ—œđ—Ąđ—š 𝗘𝗔𝗖𝗛 đ—ąđ—§đ—›đ—˜đ—„.
This one-shot was not created by me, all credit to the respective author, which is AkiraDubs, so let's separate his work from what he has done... Which was terrible, but I did this work when nothing had happened yet
¿? anyway, he deleted the video from his channel.
Feel free to change the gender of Y/N. In principle, it's ideally created for women but everyone is free to read whatever they want, about whatever they want. &lt;3
Since Treasure Planet is my favorite Disney movie and didn't get the love it deserved, I decided to write this translation, which I've really enjoyed writing, since I ✹ADORE✹ Jim.
✹let your imagination create a scene next to a real Jim.✹
ê’±àżâ™Ą ˚.*àłƒê’±àżâ™Ą ˚.*àłƒê’±àżâ™Ą ˚.*àłƒ
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ê’±àżâ™Ą ˚.*àłƒê’±àżâ™Ą ˚.*àłƒê’±àżâ™Ą ˚.*àłƒ
You have just arrived on a planet where the weather was not
 the best
 Don't get it wrong, you love the rain, but it is very dangerous to go boating while the storm is raging, meanwhile, you and your cadet friend Jim were inside the big hull, sitting in a sailboat. Jim was very upset since he warned Captain Amelia and Silver that it would be a bad idea to come to this planet. They ignored him. And you understand their anger.
-Well, here we go again. - he pronounces annoyed for the fourth time that day.
-What did I tell you? I knew it would be a bad idea to come to this planet. And what happened? A storm. - He sighs trying to calm down. - I told them already, if only they would listen to me! - he growls angrily as he walks.
-We wouldn't be in this situation if they would just listen to me. - he sighs again. - But they won't. Because they only see me as a child, that's what I'll be to them, a child. - He says indignantly and sulkily as he sits down abruptly on the sailboat.
-Well
 I don't see you as a child. You're smarter than you look. - you say with a smile as you delicately sit down in front of him.
-Thank you, I appreciate it. You're probably the only one who thinks that way about me. - he says smiling the same way you do.
-The only one? No one else? - You ask laughing as you shake your head at the second question.
-Yes. - He says looking at you while you are surprised. - I mean, my mother, don't get me wrong! I love her
but
 I feel like she doesn't trust me
. - he says pausing for a moment.
-You know, I can't do anything without her worrying, and yeah. That's what a mother would do, isn't it? I mean
I'm her only child but
I just
I want to explore the world and stuff. I know how fast and gigantic the universe is
 I just want to see every part of it. - looks up at you to let out a sigh. There was a slightly awkward silence for a few moments, but Jim continued the conversation.
-I never thought I'd be on an adventure like this. - he says, trying to defuse the situation.
-I probably didn't think I'd be on this adventure either. - you look amused, laughing a little.
-You too? - he says answering surprised, laughing softly.
-That makes two of us. I'm glad we can relate to each other in some way. - he says, laughing with you. But now he brings up another topic of conversation.
-So. What are we going to do now that this storm is happening? - He asks you to answer honestly.
-Whatever shit Silver's got on his mind- you end up saying, scratching your head.
-Yeah
 Silver has no good idea. - replies to the comment about the old cyborg.
-What do you think he's going to do? I mean I'd love to know your opinion. - you ask with a mischievous grin.
-My guess? - he says looking at you with his arms behind his head, as you nod your head. - He's probably going to try to make us wait until he's finished. I don't think this is going to clear up for the next few days. - he replies leaning back with his eyes closed.
-What do you mean? - you ask in a confused and frightened tone, nothing good is going through that old cyborg's head. He opens his eyes slowly and stands upright again.
-What, what am I trying to say? Oh, that we're stuck here, tch. If the storm doesn't clear up
. - he thinks and proceeds to close his eyes, he was really tired. - I don't think it will clear up for a while at least, so we could just relax, and make ourselves comfortable, with nothing else to do. - He replies.
-Sounds good to me. - You smile since Silver has been blowing you guys up since day one, a little rest is appreciated. But you change your mind to ask him something that has been on your mind since this morning, he's not usually so loose, something's wrong with him? It seems as if he is thinking about something. So you worry about him and ask him.
-Jim? - he opens only one eye and looks at you.
-How have you been feeling lately? - you ask, looking at him seriously but with affection and understanding.
-How have I been feeling? I don't know, some days I feel good
 and other days I feel trapped
 - he says as he looks down at his hands.
-I feel like even if I wanted to take over the ship
 I wouldn't even know where to go. - He looks into your eyes with confidence but it reflects how broken he is inside.
-I want to do the right thing and I want to make the right decision. I mean, I don't want to hurt anyone
 I don't want to disappoint anyone either, I just feel like I've been a big disappointment. - He says sadly looking away, you nod understanding his feelings and how he feels.
-I can't make him happy. I can't make her happy. I can't make anyone happy. I can't even make myself happy. - already as he finishes he looks at you sadly. You felt horrible for knowing how he feels, but you really appreciate that he's confident enough to tell you what he's going through. - So
 here I am
 Just here. - To break your heart even more, he puts on a sad smile as he plays with his fingers to calm the anxiety.
-You know
 - he looks you in the eyes and you walk over to the side he's sitting on. - You really do. You make me very happy. - you sit down next to him and now smiling next to him.
-Do I make you happy? - he says now with a little lift in his spirits. - Oh come on, you don't have to say that. - he laughs a little, looking away to hide the rosy color on his cheeks.
You just nod your head, you really weren't lying, you've learned so much and had so much fun with him that how could you not be fond of him?
-Really? - he asks you again to make sure. And you nod again.
-Yes? - He asks again, to which you say YES again. -Okay. Well
 You make me happy too. - he confesses looking at you with his blue orbs and smiling with a blush on his cheeks.
- Really? - you ask surprised, excited, smiling, and blushing. You are thrilled that the feeling is mutual.
-Yes, you do. - he says laughing a little at your reaction. - I mean. - He takes a breath and calms down. - Sometimes you can be a little bossy 
and
 you always want to be right. - he finishes intuiting what you were going to say annoyed.
-That's a lie. - you jump at him while crossing your arms.
- Yes! You always want to be right. - he says again, stinging you and being sincere.
- That's not true. - Indignant, you look at him angrily.
- Yeah. Right. Whatever helps you sleep at night - He says resignedly with his shoulders. Now you could only hear the sound of loud lightning and rain, the atmosphere was quite nice, if you can describe it that way. Jim stares at you for a few moments and while smiling, opens his left arm in welcoming mode.
-Come here. - He welcomes you warmly in his arms and you settle your head on his shoulder, he imitates you and rests his head on yours. You felt a feeling that you missed
 Feeling at home. His embrace gave so many appreciative vibes to your being, you just smiled along with him. His vanilla and coconut smell was comforting like eating something warm on a cold day, that made you relax enough to settle more into him.
-Thank you. - he says smiling while stroking your hair. - I needed to hear that. It's just
 sometimes I get stuck in my mind and I don't know who I am. -
- It's normal to feel that way. I understand. - You comfort him as you nod and he continues talking, running his hand through your hair.
- But, what I do know is that
 as long as you're here, maybe one day
 everything will make sense, you know
? - he sighs looking at your e/c eyes and you smile at him.
-Of course it will Jimbo. -
-Yeah, someday. -
ê’±àżâ™Ą ˚.*àłƒê’±àżâ™Ą ˚.*àłƒê’±àżâ™Ą ˚.*àłƒ
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kaledya · 6 months ago
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Hello there! (I know you like star wars, let's test your knowledge lol)
Richard here again. I just wanted to say that I'm terribly sorry for the flood of questions I asked previously, and instead go for a little more sober approach regarding the techniques of an artist/writer.
1) where do you find the time to write/draw? Personally I cannot ever get myself the time to draw something really detailed, or write some actually long part of my (already almost finished in my head) Hazbin Hotel au, as well as its Sinners Symphony adaptation.
2) where do you find motivation to create art? I cannot convince myself it's a good time to make something, ever, and I hate myself for that. When I see how fast you're capable of producing art (almost like a factory lmao) I cannot stop thinking about what I might be doing wrong.
3) where do you gain inspiration to make these original? Do you just start thinking and say: "hey this merged with that would be kinda funny/cool/interesting, let's do that" and just go, sit down and make it, or is there a "secret formula" to get original ideas?
I hope I didn't disturbed you during something important, have a nice day/night and see you next time, hopefully with the wheels of my AU already moving!
Once again, love your art, cherish your writing and most importantly, keep having fun making it!
Richard
OBÄ°-WAN KENOBÄ°!!! ohm I mean hi!
1-I want to study animation, so I can find time since both the drawings I make and the things I write are things I need to do anyway.
2- I don't know how to answer this exactly, but before HazbinHotel came out, I had not drawn a at for almost 4 months (this was my first artblock and I hated that) when the trailer was published. I got a great desire to draw.And when I posted my drawings on Twitter and saw that people liked my arts and wanted more, this became my motivation.I still have motivation and inspiration right now, I hope it continues.
And I'm so glad to hear you're writing AU, I'm sure you'll do a great job!
3-The thıng you mentioned happens to me from time to time.But, for example, an idea comes to my mind about what would happen if Alastor adopts a child, and I do it.Then, if I like this idea, I sit down and start planning it in detail.To give an example, Serenity emerged at the end of this process.
And when it comes to inspiration, my inspiration comes from the books I read, the TV series and movies I watch, and the games I play.If I give an example
Constantine:
Books: The Prince, The 48 laws of power ,Sherlock
Serenity:
Games: Last of us 1/2.
Books: Sherlock (Watson)
Series: Adventure time story of Marceline and Simon/ice king
So consume plenty of content and you will find inspiration.
No, it was a pleasure for me to answer your question. I wish you a good day too.And I'm so glad you like my work!❀❀
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lexicals · 1 month ago
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Aaaa okay I've finished the novels now too. Gonna put my thoughts down on them and how they compare to the tv version
So overall I think I like the novels better, the interiority you gain from the format adds a lot I think and it definitely benefits from not having to hold back on things like the gorey side of the supernatural elements (and yes, the gay as hell elements). I think that same lack of restraint in the writing adds a lot more comedy - while I thought the tv version was very funny, I found the books hilarious, and I think a lot of that is down to not having to pull punches on how outrageous wei wuxian gets to act, which is the core of the comedy so much of the time. I also felt that the ending was a lot more coherent, which makes sense given how much was cut out of it for the tv version, and obviously it's nice to have a confirmed post-canon marriage and continued adventures! The post-story cases were a lot of fun, I think some of my favourite parts were getting to see the two of them interact with their little gaggle of juniors and help guide them, it's very sweet.
As for criticisms, I have to be honest, the more mature scenes really weren't for me. I wasn't a fan of the blurry lines of consent (it felt like the aim was consensual non-consent, but... it still didn't sit right, especially some of the dream sequence stuff) and a lot of it felt fetishising to me, but then I suppose it's something to be expected from the genre, so I can't complain too much about it. I liked the fact that the in-universe homophobia was acknowledged and taken into consideration, but sometimes it felt like it was being played for titillation rather than taken seriously - again, though, genre conventions. It also felt like there was an underlying tone of colourism to the character descriptions, but honestly you could probably level that critique at the tv version as well. These were things that soured the experience a bit for me, but the overall read was still positive, and I did really enjoy the story even despite knowing what was going to happen already. It's a good tragedy when you're reading along thinking "maybe it won't happen this time" lol.
I find myself a bit confused as to what wei wuxian's actual cause of death was - obviously the tv version makes it very clear cut, but the book only calls it "spiritual rebound" and doesn't really elaborate or directly show anything from after the massacre, so it felt a bit vague. I suppose the idea is that he lost control during the siege and was torn apart by his own power? Not sure if I've missed something there or if it's just not very clear. It's not a huge annoyance but I was a bit surprised they didn't get into it more than passingly.
Anyway overall it was a really good read, and now I get to go read all the good fic that's out there :3 It's even poked my writing itch a little which hasn't happened in ages - idk if I'll actually follow through with it or just keep my musings to myself, but it's nice to have a nice big brain space to play in after a long time of not having one. I'm glad I finally got around to this after seeing other people talking about it for such a long time, it's been a while since I had a series grab me like this so it's been a lot of fun.
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scoops404 · 3 months ago
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Aaaahhh I just finished ‘Merry Men Making Merry’ (otherwise known as MMMM) and I’m so hyped about it!!! I had so much fun reading it, your world-building is amazing, so impressive!
As I said I’m a big fan of the story of Robin Hood and it brings back childhood memories. I like that you can read your fic without having any knowledge of the original story, but if you do have knowledge of it it’s so much fun to recognize parts. Like BBH being friar Tuck had me cackling, it’s perfect!
I always love how you write Larray, I can literally hear him in my head with the way you write him đŸ€­
Oooh and don’t get me started on the ingenuity of incorporating their background stories through flashbacks, that really made the story come to life for me.
//“You gave me a purpose,” Dream tells him, barely audible over the cracking and popping of the fire. The wind almost carries the words away, but George heard them. They’re his now.//
This is probably my favorite part in the fic. For a moment there you had me fooled because of how the og story ends, but your ending was literally perfect. Anyway, I don’t want to spoil too much and I’ve been going on for too long so for anyone reading this ask please go read the fic, you will not regret it!
Thank you Scoops for giving us such a wonderful story again, you’re amazing!
(All that’s missing was the map of the realms at the beginning of the story, haha)
MMMM because it's finger lickin' good!!! Lol no that's so cringe omg
Spoilers under the cut!
I really wanted to write Robin Hood and I was blessed to get the prompt (It was one of those challenged where you give your top 3 preference and then get assigned one). I knew I could write something actiony/adventury because I LOOOVE writing those and I think I'm pretty good at it. Cc!DNF don't really lend themselves to action and adventure but AU versions of them do. Deep in Dream and The Mushroom King and the Nightmare were some of my favorite stories to write. Like, fully obsessed while I was writing them and working on the world building, and MMMM reminded me heavily of those vibes.
I have seen the DIsney animated movie, of course, and also "Men In Tights" and both of those stories kind of spoof the already famous tropes of Robin Hood, so I did some digging --aka I watched an hour long youtube video essay about the evolution of Robin Hood lore-- and dove in. I wanted to add elements from different "canons" - like Robin Hood being secretly a nobleman. I also didn't want this story to be 100K words (which, as you know, I could easily accidentally do) so I decided for the plot, we would center around something fun-- stealing something, since that's what he's known for. I didn't know how to make George Maid Marian because obviously he has to be the love interest, OBVIOUSLY lol, so once I changed it to Maid Marian being Dream's sister, it all kind of fell into place.
However, I also wanted to see *how* they became the Merry Men, I think that's really interesting and integral to the story, and thus the flashbacks were born. I really don't like flashbacks, both in reading and writing, I think they can be done very very well (Hi Luci!), but normally i just find them really boring, so I had to keep them short and action packed to keep everyone's attention.
BBH as Friar Tuck -- fit tooooo perfectly, I just had to. I went back and forth on George or Sapnap being Little John and then decided it didn't really matter ultimately, they both kind of fill that role. Though, George kind of also rounds out the "Robin Hood" persona --please note that he gets mistaken for Robin Hood at least once in the fic!
I had a blast writing this one and, not going to lie, it got away from me for a while, but @rebelwithoutabroom helped pull me back lol.
Thank you so much for such a lovely review of the story! I'm so glad you liked it <3
(Yes, next time will add a map, though i have no idea what it all would look like so that will add like 5 months onto things. Also, multiple realms, what was I thinking?!)
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be-with-me-so-happily · 2 years ago
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Chapter 11
Series Summary: There are moments in our lives that have a major impact. The interactions, the adventures, and the love, all make up who we are. But when Harry can't remember those moments with YN, they are both left wondering what that means for themselves and their relationship.
Chapter Summary: It's the final one, my friends. We're finishing on how we started, from YN's perspective, just as I feel like it should be. This takes place once YN gets home from staying with her parents, about a week after she gets back, which is about 5 weeks from the time she and Harry last saw each other.
Thank you for being here, for reading this series, and for all the support! I'm glad you've enjoyed reading it as much as I've enjoyed writing it and I truly hope you enjoy this ending. 💗 Bee xx
~~~~~
Chapter Warnings: Some explicit language
~~~~~
As you sit in the bridal suite, admiring the gorgeous floral henna design being tattooed on the top of your right hand, you smile as you watch both Priya and Aman's mothers dancing around together while music fills the room.
"So
 YN
" You hear Priya state, causing you to turn enough to face her in the chair next to you. "How are you feeling?"
"This is so much fun Priya, and the design is amazing! Not as stunning as yours, but that goes without saying, since you're the bride. But thank you for this. I figured it was just for family so I'm really honored that I was invited this morning."
"Oh hush. It's not, and you are family anyway! Of course I want you up here!" She waves off your statement, giving you a wink. "But I meant later
 how are you feeling about
 later today
?"
"This is your wedding day, and you want to know how I'm doing?" You chuckle, looking over at Adhira and giving her a scowl, realizing what Priya is referring to, and knowing Adhira couldn't hold back giving her soon-to-be sister-in-law the details of your relationship, or potentially lack thereof.
"Exactly. It's my wedding day. I want to know how you feel." She states, a somewhat curious, but mostly compassionate glint in her expression. "Well, truthfully, it's a need. I need to know. Because I feel bad that Harry will be here if it's going to be too painful for you. It's just a couple of songs, cover songs, but I can just tell him-"
"No, Priya! It's alright. I didn't want you to stress about finding another band. I knew he would be here." You assure her, placing your free hand over hers. "Please, I'm fine. Don't worry about me, this day is about you!"
"Well, in that case, bring on the mimosas, because today is also about drinks and dancing!"
"And love!" You add sincerely.
‱‱‱
You crunch down on a piece of toast, walking over to your little dining table with nothing but one of Harry's oversized t-shirts and some of your lace panties on.
Harry groans and you look up, finding him nearly chewing holes in his bottom lip.
"You look too good." He mumbles deeply, squirming in his chair across from you. You can't help but feel a little satisfied at the fact that you are teasing him without even trying.
"I just got out of bed
" You respond coyly, brushing off his compliment as if you're oblivious to what you're doing to him.
"Doesn't matter." His dimples cave with a mischievous smirk. "It's one of my favorite ways to see you. Not my top favorite, but definitely up there."
Your mouth drops open and he immediately points over to you.
"Yep, that's another one of them!"
You hurl a piece of toast in his direction, extracting an exuberant laugh, which causes your heart to flutter.
He takes the last bite of his pancakes, gathering his plate with a wide grin still plastered all over his face. Once everything is in the sink, he walks back over and squats down next to you. "This actually is my favorite way to see you."
"Right." You roll your eyes.
"M'serious!" He exclaims. "I wouldn't mind waking up to it every single morning, from now til
 no, that's it. That's the answer."
"Yeah, we'll see." You joke, unable to deny the chaos of butterflies swirling throughout you. There isn't anyone you'd rather wake up with either.
"Yes, we will." He kisses your cheek and stands up, shuffling towards the bathroom door. "But right now, we better get ready to meet up with everyone, or Addy is going to kill us."
You get up and clear your plate, walking to follow Harry, but stopping to see him eyeing you up and down.
"What?" You giggle. "Stop looking at me like that!"
"You're so gorgeous. And I will never stop looking at you like this!"
After making conversation with most of Adhira and Aman's relatives, you take the opportunity, before the ceremony begins, to walk through the grand foyer of the luxury hotel.
The designer in you can't help but be fascinated by all the little details, so you pull out your phone and walk around, taking photos of almost everything you see.
You look down, making sure the photo you took of some artwork came out clearly, when you turn around and bump your shoulder into whomever was passing by.
"Oh! I'm so sorry!" You exclaim, locking the screen and looking up apologetically. Your eyes grow wide as you see those beautiful and unmistakable green rounds staring back at you.
"S'alright. Not the first time you've done it." Harry chuckles, causing all breath to leave your body.
You knew you'd see him today, it isn't a surprise, but you weren't exactly expecting to be standing this close, feeling his warmth, smelling his familiar scent, feeling flustered by the gaze that always penetrates your soul.
"Right." You nod, feeling your throat as dry as it's even been. "Umm
 how are you?"
"M'good." He responds quickly, lacking any sort of detectable emotion to give you a hint of how he really feels. "You?"
"Yep. Me too. Good." You mumble, feeling a little embarrassed as to how unconvincing your answer may have come across.
"That's good to hear." He clears his throat, crossing his arms over his chest, which usually isn't the most positive gesture coming from him. "Would
 would you be up for having a conversation later?"
Your stomach twists a little. For some reason, the way he worded that question was so different and unsettling, but you figure it's needed, so you give him a quick nod.
"Okay. I'll connect with you sometime tonight then." He states, giving a quick smile. He turns around as you both notice everyone begin to shuffle towards the French doors leading outside. "I better go. But it was nice to see you."
"You too." You smile back, feeling the knot tighten as he turns around.
He swivels back to you and runs his hand through his hair.
"I hope it's okay to say
 you look really nice." He utters.
"It is. Thank you." You utter, hoping he can hear your words but not the nervousness in your tone. "You do too."
He gives you one last smile and makes his way out the doors, presumably to set up before the wedding party is ready to make their entrance.
It takes a moment for you to gather control of your motor function, when you feel another presence next to you.
"Are you alright, Didi?" Adhira asks. You release a breath you didn't realize you had been withholding, especially considering you thought it had all left your body as soon as you saw Harry.
"Yeah, I'm
 yeah. I'm alright."
"Well, I don't really believe that, but others might." She giggles, wrapping her arm around your shoulders. "What did he say?"
"He wants to talk later." You reply, feeling your stomach twist even tighter.
"And what do you want?" She asks.
You think for a moment. The time and space you had while visiting your parents was good, mainly because you got to spend time with them. You did get the clarity you needed, which wasn't hard to do. But in terms of what you have, or don't have, with Harry, now feels like it's still up in the air. It unnerved you to hear him suggest a conversation, even though it's definitely needed. It's just the way he said it that's got you uneasy. So stoic. Maybe you were right before, maybe he did change his mind. Maybe he did give up. Having to wait for those answers is going to drive you crazy.
"I guess, firstly, I want to know how he feels."
"Well
" She begins, slowly shuffling the two of you towards the doors, stopping before the exit as you look out to the gathering of their family and friends. "You'll find out tonight."
She gives you a squeeze and leaves your side to rejoin the bridal party, as she has the role of a bridesmaid, so you take a deep breath and step through the doorway.
A seat on the end of a row, in the middle of the right section, seems like a good enough spot. You should be able to see the couple at the altar, and nothing else. No one else. You want to be able to focus on the ceremony, since that's ultimately what you are here for.
A piano and drum melody begin to play and you turn towards the doors as the officiant walks out, followed by Aman with his parents.
Maybe it's the way you say my name
Maybe it's the way you play your game
But it's so good
The female voice catches you off guard, considering Harry was presumably the one to be performing the entry song, and your head uncontrollably shoots over to where the band is located. You smile as you see Ny Oh towards the front, her mouth to the mic, as her fingers run along the keys. Your eyes travel to Sarah and Mitch, also seeing Elin standing close by. Then, by habit, they land on Harry. He is still towards the front, but has his head down, bobbing as he gently strums his acoustic guitar. The way his hair is falling down can cause any girl to swoon, and it usually does, but it elicits so many feelings in you. And memories. You've seen it happen when he's playing, when he's sad, when he's hiding a blush or a smirk. Even when he's hovering over you on the bed and looking at you with intense passion.
As the first pairing of the bridal party passes through your vision, you turn your attention back to the next ones walking down the aisle.
'Cause I'm in a fields of dandelions
Wishing on every one that you would be mine
Your gaze shoots back over to the band as you hear Harry come through the speakers with his low harmony.
And I see forever in your eyes
I feel okay when I see you smile, smile
This song is for Aman and Priya, but as you notice Harry has found you within the crowd, all of your feelings grow more intensely. You must have missed Adhira passing by because suddenly everyone begins to stand, and the chorus is repeated as Priya walks down the aisle with her mother and father on each side of her.
Tears are forming in the corners of your eyes and you try to convince yourself that they are solely due to how beautiful Priya looks in her jeweled red wedding dress, and the sparkle you see on Aman's face as he reaches his hand out for her. The tears are for those reasons and nothing else.
The melody continues as the ceremony begins, the couple keeping it short and sweet, since they are bigger fans of the actual celebration.
"I now pronounce you husband and wife." The officiant states, snapping you out of a daze you didn't know you had been in. "You may kiss the bride!"
The melody picks up and Ny Oh sings the chorus once more, accompanied by Harry's background vocals, as everyone up front walks back down the aisle, and the crowd cheers. You clap along, unintentionally shifting your focus to the band. Your gaze meets Harry's, and you can't immediately turn away. The sudden thought that you've never been more jealous of a microphone enters your mind as he continues with the lyrics, eyes fixed on you. A hot blush rises to your cheeks and you manage to break eye contact just as the rest of the guests are encouraged to make their way inside.
‱‱‱
To your delight, and relief, you find that your seat at the reception is right next to Jordan. As well as you know a lot of the family members attending, it'll be nice to have a close friend to go through the night with.
"Hey! Ready for a wild night?" He exclaims as you sit down, placing your glass of champagne on the table in front of you.
You give a small smile and shake your head, with the intention of showing how well you know how crazy things can get with the family. You've been a part of it since you were young, but Jordan had to quickly become accustomed to it when he started dating Adhira. With that in mind, and the situation with Harry, this will definitely be an interesting experience.
"It'll be one for the books." You nod, quickly taking a sip of your drink.
"Are you doing alright?"
You nod again. "Yeah."
"Are you gonna talk to him?"
"He wants to." You reply, placing your glass down and beginning to fiddle with the stem. "I mean, I guess I do too."
"Yeah. You'll find out how he feels." He replies, taking a sip of his own drink. The wording is odd, and causes an inquisitive look to show on your face, only to be met by a shrug from him. "Right?"
You shrug as well, and your ears pick up on the soft instrumental that begins to play. This time, you control your gaze and turn directly towards the doorway leading into the banquet hall where everyone is seated, watching the bridal party begin to saunter in.
The beaming grins on the faces of both Aman and Priya make you feel so good. They truly belong together. You're so happy that they are so happy. They immediately make their way to the dance floor, and you must have forgotten to keep a handle on your focus, because your gaze travels over to the band yet again. Your heart stops as you see Harry already gazing back at you, and he steps closer to the mic.
The first words leave his lips and you pull away to focus back on the happy couple. It's not you and him. Though looking at how lovingly Aman stares into his bride's eyes, it brings a tear to your own knowing how much you've wanted that with Harry. You drop your head, quickly wiping the tear, and you let your eyes wander back to him. You finally have the opportunity to really take him all in, and he looks so good. He always has. But of course, you really haven't been able to admire it, not fully admire it, for a while now. It hasn't changed though, because he looks incredible in the white button-up shirt under his light blue suit. That is your favorite blue. It's also your favorite color on him. You meet his eyes once again, his fixated on yours as he sways back and forth.
Fall into me and I'll catch you, darlin'
We'll dance in the street like nobody's watching
It's just you and me
And the song on repeat in my head
Playing over and over
I'm drunk on your voice high on the moment
I'd fall for you twice if that's what you wanted
I'd give you my life from now till forever
I'm falling in love with you
Over and over again
Your breath hitches as you think you notice a subtle smile appear, but his eyes quickly flicker over to Aman and Priya, so yours do as well.
Your nerves were already on alert from the fact that you'd be seeing him at this wedding, even with the knowledge of his attendance, but his unreadable demeanor, and now disappearing smile, have caused that level to rise. You wonder at what point you two will have this necessary, but now anxiety-inducing conversation, so you can swiftly and politely make your exit afterwards if it doesn't go well.
Until I had met you
There was no sun in my sky
No mirrors for monsters
And no love in sight
Then you walked down those stairs
And I knew my heart wasn't mine
On the day that I met you
My whole world came alive
You look over again, seemingly unable to control yourself anymore, and see that subtle smile again. This time it stays, even when he notices you watching him, it stays.
Your eyes jolt over to your friends for just a moment, since that's where they should be focused, but immediately move back to Harry. Again, the smile remains, and it may be your imagination, but you swear it's grown even wider.
I'm falling in love with you
I'm falling in love with you
I'm falling in love with you over and over
I'm falling in love with you over and over
You take another sip of the champagne, mildly questioning how much you've already had considering the heat rushing to your cheeks. But nonetheless, you watch Harry. As improper as it may be to some that you aren't watching the bride and groom, you watch Harry. As confusing as all the emotions are that course through you, alongside the champagne, you watch Harry. As unsure as you are about how anything will end up tonight, you watch Harry.
And Harry watches you.
"Please raise your glasses for this beautiful couple before us! To Aman and Priya!" He toasts, and you quickly grab your glass, not even realizing that the song had ended.
You place it back on the table and look up to see that Harry has left the stage and is making his way towards you. Your heart flutters as he gets even closer and it dawns on you that the chair to your right has remained empty for a reason. It's his chair. Whether they forgot to change it, or simply couldn't, it doesn't really matter, because either way he is now shaking Jordan's hand and lowering himself into it.
"Hi." He speaks softly.
"Hi." You reply, hoping those words actually came out and weren't lost in the breath you exhaled with them. "That was good. You did
 you all did good. Up there."
"Thank you." He chuckles, catching the attention of the nearby waiter carrying a tray of champagne flutes. He takes one for himself and you quickly grab another for your own, taking a large sip before placing it on the table.
You turn to try and bring Jordan into the conversation, hoping he could ease the awkwardness you're already feeling, when you realize his seat is void of him. You scan the rest of the table and shake your head. You're not sure why it didn't occur to you before, but no one else is there. Those other seats are for the others in the band, who are conveniently missing. So now there you are, left alone with Harry, and you make a mental note to interrogate your so-called group of friends to find out if their sudden disappearing act was on purpose.
"Wow!" He exclaims, and you turn back to him, following his gaze as it lands on your right hand. "That's very pretty. It's called henna, right?"
"Mhm." You hum.
"Can
 umm
 may I take a look?" He asks timidly, with an innocence to his gaze.
You nod and raise your hand, feeling that familiar warmth as he brings his to sit under it. He lowers his face and his breath on your skin sends a shiver down your spine. The index finger of his other hand suddenly begins tracing the intricate design, going over every subtle line and curve of the ink as it moves up your forearm.
He looks up to you and straightens up, still holding your hand in his.
"It really is beautiful." He utters and your heart begins to race.
However, a frown appears between his brows, causing the beating to slow and your stomach to turn. He looks back down to your hand and turns it over, so that your palm is facing upward.
"Your cut healed nicely." He sighs, not revealing what emotion was behind it.
"Yeah." You clear your throat. "Thank you."
"No problem." He mutters, releasing your hand and turning his body to fully face his spot at the table. At that moment, your friends all appear, simultaneously, which gives you the answer to the question you had a few moments before.
"Hey everyone!" Sarah exclaims, switching her glance between you and the man beside you. You glare, unamused by their apparent scheme. Mainly because now is not the time to have a serious conversation with him. She gives an awkward smile back and takes her seat, as do the rest of your friends.
You spot the wait staff begin to walk around with plates of food, and have never felt more relieved to eat. Hopefully dinner will take some of the awkward energy away.
‱‱‱
As the plates are cleared, and toasts are given, it is announced there will be a Bollywood dance routine performed by some family members, alongside dessert, which always perks you up.
You had chosen chocolate cheesecake, and your mouth begins to water as it's placed in front of you, but your throat immediately dries up as you feel Harry tapping on your thigh and leaning in closer towards you.
"Can we go somewhere and talk?" He whispers, and your eyes dart around the table. Everyone's attention is either focused on their plates, or the dancefloor, as the music begins to play.
"But
 dancing, and dessert
" The words slip out with a minor whimper, not intending to actually utter those thoughts out loud.
"Just for a moment. Please?" He asks, and as you look in his direction, the plea in his expression is too much for you to deny his request, so you nod and follow him out of the banquet hall.
He leads you out the doors and over to a staircase, close enough to still hear the festivities, but far enough away so that they don't overtake your conversation.
He walks up to the third step, resting his back against the banister, and you gather your dress to step up and stand against the wall across from him. As soon as you are settled, your eyes fixate on your hands and they fidget with the nails of the other.
It's silent. Maybe he's waiting for you to speak first? Or maybe he doesn't even know what to say? You at least would've wanted dessert before potentially having to bolt out of the venue from embarrassment or heartache. At least your heels are easy enough to slip off if you need to make a quick getaway.
"How are your parents?" He breaks the silence, his question causing a scrunch in your nose.
"Good. My dad's doing well."
"Good." He nods in response.
"Look, Harry-"
"YN..." He interrupts, standing up straighter and running a hand through his gorgeous curls. You could curse them for being so inviting to touch. "M'not gonna take up much of your night. I just wanna get something off my chest."
"Alright." You swallow nervously, hoping you'll find out exactly how he feels and that you can express the same, wherever that leads you.
"I love you." He suddenly states, catching you a little off guard. For some reason, whatever you thought he was going to say, that was not it. "I don't think I'll ever stop loving you if m'honest."
He puts his hands in his pockets and your breathing picks up as he takes the smallest step towards you, raising his gaze to meet yours and locking in on you.
"I know I hurt you. I can only imagine how much pain I caused you. And I am truly sorry. Because what I feel now, is probably only a fraction of what you've been feeling, and I feel so fucking empty without you."
He steps closer again and you let out a whimper as a tear escapes down your cheek. Once again, like the last time you two spoke, his finger is quick to wipe it away.
"I never want to hurt you again. I never want to make you cry again. As much as it hurts to be without you, that would hurt so much more. I love you too much to put you through that again."
You sigh, unable to move, barely able to breathe, as his eyes, and words, hit deep into your soul.
"Please say something now." He whispers.
Every response you want to give him vanishes from your mind. This is what you wanted. This is what you came home for. He is what you came home for. Yet your mind goes blank as your mouth opens to speak.
"My heart was broken, and it hurt so much. Because I think the hardest thing I've ever had to do is walk away while still being in love with you."
His hands softly travel from your shoulders, down to your hands, and you feel a strike of lightning shoot through your veins.
"Do
 do you still love me?" He asks in a whisper.
"Yes." You whisper back in response.
"Because you're all that I care about, YN. I just want you to be happy. Whatever I need to do to make that happen, I'll do it. I would've barged my way through that airport, but you asked for time and I wanted to give it to you. And if you need more, I'll give you that too. No matter the outcome. I'll give you whatever you want."
Hair is tenderly brushed out of your face and tucked behind your ear and you see more love in his eyes than you ever have before.
"Do you still need time?" He asks, clearing his throat and glancing down for a moment as his thumbs run over your knuckles.
"Yes." You state, squeezing his hands before his head drops too low. This may just be the moment you get back everything you've been missing, everything you've wanted. "With you. I need more time with you."
His hands drop yours and instantly hold onto your cheeks, radiating a heat that could power every chandelier in that ballroom. His gaze flickers between each of your eyes, and he doesn't wait another second before his lips are passionately pressed on yours. Your hands swiftly travel up to rest around his neck, not only to embrace him, but to keep yourself from completely melting at his touch. He steps closer, leaving no room between your heaving chests, and your back pushes firmly against the wall.
He pulls away and you both catch your breath, his forehead resting against your own, and you hear him hum in contentment.
"Cheeky." He smirks, peppering tiny kisses on your cheeks. "I can definitely give that to you."
The sharp sound of mic feedback pierces through the speakers from the hall, and Harry leads you, hand in hand, back to your table. He holds your chair out as you sit back down, and gives you a quick kiss on the cheek.
"I'll be right back." He utters into your ear, leaving you to watch him in a confused state as he heads back up to meet the rest of the band.
"Hello! I'm Harry." He states into the mic and he waves to the crowd. "It's a great night, isn't it?"
He looks over to you with a wide grin and your cheeks flood with heat, yet again.
"We've performed a couple of songs already tonight, and I wouldn't call this a wedding song, but it's really fun, it's our last one before our friend DJ Raj takes over, and it was requested by the groom." He turns to Mitch and Sarah, nodding for them to start it off, then turns back to the mic. "At least that's what I'll be claiming."
He smirks as he looks back to you and holds onto the mic stand, closing his eyes and shaking his head to the beat before taking in a deep breath.
Here to take my medicine, take my medicine
Treat you like a gentleman
Give me that adrenaline, that adrenaline
Think I'm gonna stick with it
Your jaw drops open and your palm immediately covers your open mouth, holding back the loud laugh of unbelief threatening to burst out.
"Didi!" Adhira exclaims, plopping down right next to you. "You're smiling! Does this mean it worked?"
You nod and tug on your bottom lip. You can see, even from this distance, how Harry's eyes begin to fill with desire as he stares at you.
I had a few, got drunk on you
And now I'm wasted
And when I sleep I'm gonna dream of how you

"Tasted." You whisper, aware that only you know the rest of that line. Not that he'd sing it in front of this particular group anyway. Suddenly your gaze shoots over to your friend and your brow instantly furrows. "Wait
 did what work
?"
"Come on
" She replies, drawn out, most likely due to a couple glasses of champagne. Her tipsy condition is ideal for this moment considering you want answers. "The last time at the bar, the songs
 the singing tonight, and the songs
 that was me! I'm the mastermind!"
Jordan gets up from the other side of you and holds Adhira by the shoulders, lifting her up from the seat.
"I wouldn't say 'mastermind', babe
 but you helped
" He states, giving you a smile.
"I'm just glad it worked! They're in love!" She shouts, thankfully no louder than the song being played, though you couldn't care less at this point. It's true, after all.
They make their way to the dancefloor and you turn your attention back to where you want it to be, right on Harry, biting on your lower lip as he bounces around, smirking every time his eyes catch yours.
If you let it, your body could float. All of the heaviness from the past couple of months has lifted completely, evaporated, never to be seen or felt again. All that's left is the light daze that being with Harry gives you, and it's in the best way. But that daze, and the sudden heat rushing to your core, is not being hindered in any way by the current song.
If you go out tonight, I'm going out
'Cause I know you're persuasive
You got that something
I got me an appetite
Now I can taste it
You giggle as you take your actual first bite of dessert, shaking your head at how Harry looks as if he wants to devour you more than you want the cheesecake in front of you. And you won't complain.
We're getting dizzy, oh, we're getting dizzy, oh
La-da-da-da-da
We're getting dizzy, oh, we're getting dizzy, oh
La-da-da-da-da
Before you take another bite, Harry's hands are pulling you out of your chair and into his arms, wrapping one around your waist as the other's hand sits against your cheek.
"Was Aman really the one to pick that song?" You chuckle, lifting your fingers to finally, once again, entangle them in his gorgeous hair.
"M'not telling." He simply replies, running his thumb across your lips to wipe some crumbs away. "Think we can sneak out early?"
Your teeth grind into your lower lip as you shift your weight within his embrace. The butterflies you feel inhibit any words, so you use a smile and nod as your answer.
Harry looks around the room and leads you around the tables, stopping every few paces to give you a quick kiss.
As you make it out into the foyer, he turns around, pulls you in by your waist, and presses his lips firmly against your own. Your palms rest on his chest, and you sigh as you feel the heat from his skin. It's quickly matched by the heat building up at your core.
"If you keep stopping to kiss me, we'll never get anywhere." You utter, your lips hovering in front of his.
"We'll get there Cupcake. I just have a lot to make up for. I don't plan on stopping anytime soon."
‱‱‱
Harry had never been more nervous in this entire life, until this moment. Nothing had made him shake, or sweat, or forget how to breathe, more so than what he was about to do. However, he knows that this one action will lead to a moment that will top it immensely.
He picks up his phone from the counter, his shaky thumb hovering over the contact. He takes a deep breath and presses it.
Pacing is all he can do while the phone rings, but he halts in place once the sound turns into a clearing of the throat on the other end of the line.
"Harry! How are you?" The murmur can barely be heard.
"I'm doing well, Mr. YLN, how are you?" He replies.
"I'm doing alright." Your dad clears his throat again, and Harry begins to feel some guilt for the fact that he isn't there, talking to your father in person. "But
 I have a feeling you aren't calling to
 just check in with me
"
A smile quickly appears on Harry's face. Your father has always had the best attitude, and a knack for being very in tune with what's going on. He says it's because his only hobby is to people-watch, so he can pick up on those unspoken cues very quickly. He also jokes that he should be a body language analyst for the FBI.
"You're always on point." Harry chuckles, inhaling a deep breath and gathering his composure, as if your dad can hear his stature change. It's possible. "I'm sorry I can't do this in person. But
 I have an important question to ask you."
Sitting across from Harry, in your favorite cafe, flipping the page of your book, you look up to find Harry's eyes on you, smiling as he takes a sip of coffee.
"What?" You ask with a giggle, a slight blush quickly forming on your cheeks.
"It's just been a good day." He shrugs, and your blush grows deeper. "But every day for the past two weeks has been a good day."
"You're adorable." You shake your head, feeling the exact same way. As absolutely terrible as those recent couple of months were, you've never felt better with him than you do now. "Do you wanna do anything in particular?"
"Yes! I have the perfect plan!" He suddenly exclaims, causing you to find him looking outside at the rain. He quickly shoots up from his seat and moves next to you, reaching out his hand to take yours. "Come with me."
"What?"
"Please?"
You can't resist that smile, and those dimples, and the way he makes your heart flutter. Not that you want to anyway. You let him take your hand and guide you out of your chair, then out of the cafe, into the rain.
"Wanting some peak romance?" You ask, knowing it is a tradition of yours, but unsure as to why he was so interested in doing this so abruptly.
"Something like that."
He brings you closer, staring at your hand, and you notice his breathing increase dramatically.
"Are you okay?"
"Yeah." He replies breathlessly. "I, umm
 I wanna make this moment special."
"What do you mean?" You ask, simply watching his expression for any clue it could give you.
"I love you, Cupcake
"
"I love you too, Harry." You smile, cupping his cheek to encourage him to look at you. The anxiousness in his eyes causes yours to widen.
"You are my everything, YN. I can't believe there was that short period of time where I missed out on just
 being with you."
"Harry
"
"I was lost for a moment and
 I almost lost you
 but I found my way back home. That's you. You are my home."
"Oh my god
" You whisper, your heart racing faster than the speed of the raindrops falling all around you.
Harry looks down at the ground and frowns as he sees the puddle that has accumulated at your feet. He squeezes your hand, reaching his other into his coat pocket, and stepping closer as he holds a small box in front of you. His eyes flicker between it and your gaze, finally landing on you with a nervous smile.
"I don't want to waste another moment together. And I've been wanting to do this for a long time, so I don't want to live another second without asking you
 " He clears his throat and his shaky hand opens the box. "Will you marry me?"
It's a surreal experience, to say the least. Everything happens in slow motion, but too quickly at the same time.
This is Harry. The love of your life. The man who dragged you outside into a storm because you told him you'd never been kissed in the rain. The man who learned to make your coffee order just so that you could stay just a few extra minutes at home with him before heading to work. The man who sat on the bathroom floor with you, all night, holding you while you cried.
He means everything to you. Everything. You can't imagine a life without him, and now you won't have to.
"Yes!" You exclaim, flinging your arms around his neck and pulling him as close as you can. "Forever, yes!"
~~~~~
the end.
~~~~~
Series Masterlist
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emilybeemartin · 1 year ago
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Hi! Sorry to jump in there while not knowing you. I've just discovered you via your very nice drawing of Boromir and his nephew. This is so adorkable. So, first thing? Thanks.
Second, this might be a long introduction so, sorry and hang in there.
I looked to your art through your page and really loved it. The thing is I am looking for an illustrator because (although it is not clear on my page) I am writing (I am trying to write) Children tales. (Well only one is autopublished so...). I have another tale finished and I can't do the cover myself.
Then I discovered that you were also a real writter with lots of books out AND a ranger. I am really impressed (in awe?) and was not sure I should ask. So this is why I am writing such a long text.
Cut to the chase: Do you do commission? or cover? For children tale? (by the way English is not my mother tongue so apologies for the mistakes).
Anyway, thank you, just to take the time of reading this and Thank you for your very beautiful art (even if you don't do commission).
Thank you so much! I'm glad you're enjoying my work. Unfortunately I'm closed to commissions for the foreseeable future. But I'll punt this out there to any illustrators who are looking for clients--send @emmanuellececchi your portfolios!
Bonne chance with writing and publishing your stories! Children's books are a big adventure but can be frustrating, so don't despair.
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terramythos · 10 months ago
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TAYLOR READS 2023: SYSTEM COLLAPSE BY MARTHA WELLS
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Title: System Collapse (The Murderbot Diaries #7) (2023)
Author: Martha Wells
Genre/Tags: Science Fiction, First Person, Agender Protagonist
Rating: 9/10
Date Began: 11/19/2023
Date Finished: 12/31/2023
In the aftermath of the alien contamination incident of the Adamantite colony, Murderbot and its humans face a new challenge. Barish-Estranza, a major corporation, seeks to claim the planet and its inhabitants as salvage, which would doom the colonists to contract slavery. To save them from this fate, the non-corporate humans must find a way to convince the colonists to trust them and reject Barish-Estranza’s offer.
But after a nervous breakdown, Murderbot has problems of its own. Unable to trust its own judgment, Murderbot must come to terms with its distressingly human response to the traumatic events of Network Effect— all while keeping its humans from accidentally killing themselves in the cutthroat political climate Barish-Estranza brings to the Adamantite colony.
“On the team feed, Ratthi asked, Can we come down and help you, SecUnit? No, I told him. He hadn’t asked me what I was doing, probably because he was afraid I didn’t know. Which, valid, but this time I actually did know. I continued around the edge, because if I was right, the first one would be directly attached to the pad. If it wasn’t here, I was going to look incredibly fucking stupid and the humans were going to assume because of redacted I— Oh, here it is.”
For live reading notes, check the reblogs (contains unmarked spoilers).
Content warnings and review (spoiler-free and spoiler versions) under the cut.
Content Warnings: Mentioned -- Murder, torture, sexual slavery. Depicted -- Slavery, PTSD, self-hatred, emotional manipulation, dehumanization, violence, gore (kinda), death (implied)
**SPOILER-FREE REVIEW**
This section is spoiler free for System Collapse, but not The Murderbot Diaries as a whole, so please keep that in mind!
I've consistently enjoyed The Murderbot Diaries throughout its run. The strikingly relatable narration Murderbot supplies makes the books approachable and entertaining to read, despite often delving into disturbing and dark subject matter like slavery, depression, and anxiety. The book chronologically preceding this one, Network Effect, is one of my favorite novels of all time. While System Collapse doesn't reach those heights (and it doesn't need to), it's yet another story following Murderbot's adventures and struggles with personhood, so I predictably liked it.
System Collapse occupies a more transitional space than previous entries. We end the novel in much the same place as in Network Effect, literally and metaphorically. Murderbot makes the same decision it does at the end of Network Effect; to leave its Preservation humans and travel with ART and its crew instead. I question whether System Collapse was originally planned when Network Effect was written; as a story, it feels tacked onto that entry. It's just more of that book-- a continuation of some loose threads from it.
However, this isn't a criticism, at least not yet, because despite feeling similar to Network Effect, System Collapse introduces critical character development in order for the next arc, which I imagine will focus more on ART and the University, to succeed. I'll get into more detail about that in the spoiler section, but I have no problem with a break from the extreme high stakes tension of Network Effect to spend time developing various characters, including Murderbot itself, especially going into the next story arc.
**SPOILER REVIEW**
By far System Collapse's greatest strength is how it addresses Murderbot's trauma post-Network Effect. If I'm right and this entry wasn't originally planned, I'm glad Martha Wells decided to write it anyway, because leaving the long term effects of what Murderbot went through in the air and unaddressed would be a disservice to Murderbot as a character and readers who have undergone similarly traumatic experiences.
In particular, Murderbot experiences a realistic depiction of PTSD, something it's disturbed by and ashamed about. System Collapse can often be a brutal read because Murderbot is so hard on itself, seeing itself as an incompetent failure for having a reasonable reaction to trauma. It hearkens back to earlier points in the series where Murderbot didn't really see itself as a person, something that has gradually changed over time. But one thing that sticks out to me is a heavier thematic focus on Murderbot's humanity.
Murderbot itself is a construct-- a combination of machinery and cloned human material. We know it has a human face, human neural tissue, and some organic body parts, but the series to this point has focused on Murderbot's PERSONHOOD rather than its HUMANITY, which are separate things in this series. Murderbot itself doesn't identify as human, usually avoiding the association and approaching the world as a machine would. So after Murderbot suffers its PTSD episode, when ART says “this affects the part of you that is human," and Murderbot doesn’t outright deny that assertion, it's VERY striking to a long time reader. Murderbot's human aspects have to this point been depicted as a nuisance, something Murderbot feels neutral about at best and dislikes at worst.
System Collapse makes a direct connection between a fundamental aspect of Murderbot's character and this idea of humanity. It's something that seems obvious in retrospect but as far as I know is the first time the narrative directly addresses it. Murderbot LOVES the TV show The Rise and Fall of Sanctuary Moon. As an autistic-coded character, Murderbot's primary special interest IS Sanctuary Moon (and the concept of human media as a whole). It watches favorite episodes of this space soap opera to comfort itself when it feels stressed or overwhelmed. One reason Murderbot cites for not hating humans despite what they've done to it, even before meeting humans it likes, is their ability to create media.
Yet when we meet ART in the second book, a space ship bot with greater than human intelligence, it doesn't understand the emotional aspect of media at all. It needs to watch TV shows by seeing the reactions of others to get full context. One of the ways ART and Murderbot initially bond is through watching shows together like this. Murderbot cites "human neural tissue" as a requirement for fully understanding media. Yet here in System Collapse that same neural tissue causes major problems for Murderbot— the trauma response.
One connection System Collapse makes to Sanctuary Moon and why it's so important to Murderbot is that, after hacking its governor module pre-series, Murderbot used Sanctuary Moon to heal and rewire its brain. Murderbot has always had some human aspect to it, whether it likes to acknowledge this or not. And one of the things most precious to it is something it would not be able to fully understand or appreciate otherwise. So Murderbot has to grapple with both positive and negative aspects to, as ART identifies (correctly, I feel), its humanity. I was hesitant about this framing at first, as the series to this point has avoided addressing this so directly. But on reflection I REALLY like it, and am interested to see how the next entry expands upon this.
Beyond Murderbot itself we do get development of some newer characters. Iris, ART’s favorite human, made an appearance in the last book, but gets a lot more screen time in System Collapse. We get a sense of her self doubt, but willingness to do what is right in the face of danger. Another character I really enjoy is Tarik. I honestly can't remember if he made more than a passing appearance in Network Effect. But System Collapse develops him as a human foil to Murderbot; he was part of a corporate death squad and broke free, has trauma associated with that, is the newest member of ART'S crew, and is quietly a badass as like, a background detail, which is pretty funny. With the book's greater focus on humanity and how it relates to Murderbot, I think a character like this has a lot of potential and I'm excited to see where that goes.
Slavery and self-determination are core themes of the series, and we continue with that trend in System Collapse. Barish-Estranza are the primary antagonists and seek to enslave the surviving colonists of Admantine in everything but name, and the conflict focuses on finding a way to convince said colonists to establish themselves as an independent entity to escape that fate. While I don't think it's the most poignant exploration of these ideas in the series, it is nice to see the consistency of The Murderbot Diaries' anti-slavery message and the variety of ways it's explored throughout.
Another overarching plot thread gets expanded upon in this entry-- that of free constructs besides Murderbot. Murderbot encounters a "ComfortUnit" (a cutesy name for a sex slave) earlier in the series and frees it, and we still don't know where it went or what it has done since then. In Network Effect Murderbot frees another SecUnit which it calls "Three", who is a minor character in this entry. During the story of System Collapse Murderbot frees two other SecUnits owned by Barish-Estranza, one of whom helps them during the climax. It's implied this Unit will do what Murderbot initially did and pretend it's still under the governor module's control while continuing to do its job.
So my question is, when does this part of the story all come together? The slavery of constructs is arguably THE conflict of the series. Murderbot has given various constructs the means to disable their governor modules and free themselves throughout the series. Presumably this could cause a chain reaction over time as other constructs free each other. Is this the endgame of the series? I don't know, but I'm excited to find out.
**CONCLUSION**
As always I greatly enjoyed System Collapse and highly recommend the entirety of The Murderbot Diaries. It's one of my favorite series ever and if you haven't read them yet
 DO IT! I would not consider System Collapse the best entry in the series (it's hard to beat Network Effect) but it provides compelling character development and food for thought regarding the next story arc of the series.
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artist-issues · 9 months ago
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(I may have accidentally clicked the Unfollow button instead of the Ask button, my bad!! 😅 Still following ya!)
I'm here to deliver you a fun question amidst a world full of negativity, and that is;
If you ever had the opportunity to create your own story/animated film, what would you want it to be about? Who would be the characters and how would you want to write their stories? Would you bring in subtle tenets of your faith, or go all-out Lewis/Tolkien and dive into analogy/Christian values? Fantasy or Sci-fi? Romcom or thriller? Adventure or something cosy and intimate? Any worldbuilding?
Basically, if you could write your dream stories, what would they be about?
Sorry if you've got a similar question before, but I am really curious. Your posts talking about storytelling and faith always fascinate me, and I'd love to know how someone with such a love for Christ and stories would go about creating their own stories 💙
This is a wonderful question! I can't tell you how wonderful. Thank you! I'm so glad you follow me still!
I guess I'd always lean more toward allegory, and fantasy. I don't know how to make a story that isn't saying something very intentionally about God and people and their relationship to God.
It's funny, my taste in stories is more intimate. My favorite Disney movie is Lilo & Stitch, for example. But I have a hard time boiling it down when I make my own stories, because I like to trace every character's motivations back to their source--and when I do that, I wind up world building without meaning to, for way longer than I planned!
I make my stories based off of the Invisible Ink model by Brian McDonald, with a few tweaks to the outline so that it makes sense to me specifically.
So I always start with a thesis statement, the Point of the Story, the lesson I'm hoping it teaches. Then I break it down by listing "characters that need to learn it" and "characters that believe the opposite of it" and "characters that know it already." And then how they all interact, and where they'll be by the end of the story. Fun stuff like setting and fictional history and characterizations come while I'm filling all of that in, kind of naturally, which I wish I was better at giving in to.
Anyway! On to the fun part of your question;
I keep my stories really private because I have learned that if I "tell" the story, even just in a summary or a tumblr post or a text to a friend, I lose a lot of inspiration and a lot of...mental freedom to finish the story itself. It's like once I say it out loud, that version of the story is final in my subconscious, and I have less motivation to tweak it.
So I don't tell people about my ideas. Not unless we're officially or professionally collaborating.
But this question is so GOOD and I so APPRECIATE IT, that I'm going to get over that and tell you about one, for example, that I started doing but probably won't get to make.
I call it "Come When You're Called" and it's a story about a sheep farm, from the perspective of the farm animals (but specifically the dogs.) The style is like if all of Ruyard Kipling's Serious Animals With Their Own Noble Cultures met Albert Payson Terhune's How Animals Thrive Serving Their Owners met Disney's Fun Anthropomorphic Animals.
The main character is a border collie named Sky Blue (she's liver-colored with blue eyes) who is learning the lifestyle of a good dog on her master's farm. She's very energetic. Thats the one word you could use to describe her. She never stops trying to play or have fun. She's proud of being the fastest dog on the property; the older border collie she's learning from, Sharps, isn't even as fast as she is. He's teaching her how to recognize the Master's commands and obey them immediately.
Sharps is excellent at what he does, but he's super irritable because all he cares about is the work. If he had a character arc, it would be to find his identity in how much his Master loves him instead of how well he can do his job. When he first meets Sky, he doesn't like her because there's a subtle fear that he's getting too old to do the work himself. He's very strict.
There's another older dog on the property. His name is Lockjaw but everybody calls him LJ, and he's the opposite of Sharps. He's even older, wiser, and downright jolly. He used to be the guard dog for the whole huge property, but he's been raising a young German Shepherd named Buckwild to take it over. Buckwild and LJ have southern accents and Buck is a very smart, good dog...as long as someone tells him what to do, and exactly how to do it: his default state is laziness. He becomes Sky's love interest.
Anyway, the music would be very highlands-folksy—think The Oh Hellos. Each animal species on the farm has its own "culture," but they all function like a kingdom serving their king, the human Master. When you're living by that code of obeying and fulfilling your purpose, the animals generally call it "Coming When You're Called." But if you are disobedient, lazy, or out for yourself, stealing food or killing the Master's chickens or whatever, you're twisted and looked at with scorn and apprehension by the good animals.
It would be super episodic. đŸ€·â€â™€ïž There's villain characters, like a pack of wolves that like to try picking off the sheep every once in a while. Theres also a tomcat who does not Come When He's Called, but just sort of does whatever he wants around the farm and causes mischief. Theres a tiny black kitten who Sky teaches what she's learning, about how to Come When You're Called, who wants to grow up and chase the lazy tomcat off and take his place. Stuff like that.
I have other ideas. One, in particular, I've mentioned before, got me involved with the studio I'm currently working in. It's an allegory to do with a siren, vampire, and werewolf in the early 2000s. But I'll keep that one to myself đŸ«ą for now! The story the studio and I are making right now is sci-fi fantasy adventure, about a family that needs to figure out their relationship to each other and the world they're finding themselves rulers of...but that's all I'll say about that until it's out there for people to watch!
Really I like creating all of it. I've got a sci-fi idea, three fantasy ones, and then an ongoing batch of monster stories, too! I guess I always tend to create as if my audience is...in that 12-20 range? But really, like Disney, I'd like it if my stuff could be enjoyable for all ages. We'll see! I think! I hope!
Thank you for this question!
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nexusconjunx · 1 year ago
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I finished the gundam anime! ... it went about as well as I expected. First of all i want to make it clear that WFM is an excellent show. However. Immediately after I started an 86 rewatch with a friend; That made me realise that I really wanted witch from mercury to be like 86. 86 has bite and teeth and INCREDIBLE character writing and direction; meanwhile WFM is very flat. Too "polished"; as in, it needed to be more messy. It has a cast as big as 86; but 86 gives you more meat to these characters in 3 episodes than WFM delivers in a season.
86 doesn't coddle the viewer, meanwhile WFM held my hand all the way through. I needed more scenes like Guels big earth adventure, more MESSY character reactions. They all felt too disconnected. Meanwhile, when a character dies in episode 3 of 86, it's HURTFUL. You can feel the anger and rage felt by the spearhead group and they have BITE. They don't coddle their handler, they don't have time for her whining.
I also needed MORE of Suletta and Miorine. I'm glad they got married, but again. They felt disconnected. There needed to be a better delivery. More emotion.
Disconnect disconnect disconnect and too CLEAN - I needed to know more about shaddiq and OG Elan. The scene where young Lauda and Guel meet for the first time? I needed those scenes that tell me about why I should care about the others too. I liked them as characters, they had a purpose, but it's just. Show me what made shaddiq do it. Show me how the benerit group operates on earth. I liked guels earth adventure BECAUSE it's so messy. I wanted more of that.
Gwitch was fine, overall.
Anyway, watch 86, it's really, really good.
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