#ANGST IS OFFICIALLY OVER BABY TIME FOR JOY

[pressedink]

Tug, chapter 11: Now

sneaky sneaker sneak below 🛒🥭🧁

“Mm so you’re a ruin your insides, who gives a shit about your digestive tract kind of guy?”

“And you’re an I hate joy and pretend to like healthy food kind of asshole?”

He grins after wrapping his pink lips around the word asshole with vigor. It’s so bright Evan wonders if he should ask him for a referral to his dentist.

“Ah, you’ve got me pinned,” Evan says, loving the immediate banter and smirking right back at him. “Am I that easy to read?”

“Impossible actually,” he says, lips stretching out and pushing his cheeks further up his face. “But we just met so give me a few seconds to adjust and I’m sure I can prove I’m up for the challenge.”

Evan feels hyper aware of the space his tongue is taking up in his throat and the way his breathing’s only clear pattern is erratic. He’s staring at the man in front of him and really looking, and the thing that he really can’t wrap his mind around is the man is looking right back.

At him.

He hasn’t had this much direct eye contact since before Zoom became a regular part of his day to day.

[myfictionaldreams]

Protect and Forget // Mafia!Stucky x Fem!Reader

Summary: Life as the girlfriend of the Mafia boss and his second-in-command was not always smooth sailing, everything in life did not always go to plan. Two weeks before your birthday, a threat was made to your life. What happens when Steve and Bucky begin to push you away as they search for the threat?

Tags: 18+ readers only, smut, threesome, angst (LOTS!), fluff, smut, death threats, crying/anxiety, begging, alcohol consumption, confrontation, arguing (kinda), hurt/comfort, body worship, oral sex (m and f), fingering, anal, double penetration, multiple orgasms, creampie, dirty talk, size difference, praise kink, squirting

Words: 9k (oops)

my masterlist 📚 AO3 Link

Steve and Bucky had been counting down to your birthday for the past month, leaving small hints for whatever it was that they were planning. This included travelling to a special destination and a multitude of surprises you could never even dream of. However, life as the girlfriend of the Mafia boss and his second-in-command was not always smooth sailing, everything in life did not always go to plan.

Two weeks before your birthday, a threat was made to your life. Luckily it only came in the form of a note, filled with threats and promises that neither of the boys would allow you to read. Nothing in the world was more important to them than your safety, this had been a priority since day one so this mean that for your protection, you were secured inside of your house until the target could be eliminated.

It wasn’t so bad, to begin with as the house you shared with Steve and Bucky was grand and the garden was your pride and joy but you were even banned from a simple walk. Even though there were multiple guards, cameras and security protecting the property, it was better to be safe than sorry in their eyes.

The loneliness only began to bother you on day 8. Like clockwork, as the morning alarms began to sound, Steve and Bucky would kiss your cheeks simultaneously before rolling out of bed, changing and leaving to continue their hunt to find whoever had threatened their girl, only returning in the early hours of the morning as you were fast asleep in bed. Luckily your bodyguard was stationed outside and he would regularly come in to check on you, spending hours talking about anything and everything just to keep you from going completely insane.

On the 13th day, you’d made it your mission to try and stay awake for the boys returning, a steady excitement humming in your stomach as it struck midnight and your birthday had officially begun! Then it was 1 am rolling around… and then 2 am, and still no sign of the boys or even a message. By the time 3 am was displayed on your phone screen, your eyes were almost burning with exhaustion, leaning your head on the couch arm, you began to drift into a light sleep from where you waited in the living room.

The light sleep soon deepened, enough so that you didn’t wake as Steve carried your sleeping body to bed as the mafia leader and his best friend returned at 4 am.

All three of you groaned as the phone alarm rang at 6 30am, the repetitive kiss on your cheek soon following the silencing of the alarm. Instead of falling back to sleep, you found yourself frowning, blinking a few times to clear the blur from your sight and then rolled over to look at them both. Neither seemed to acknowledge your questioning stare as they continued to get ready to leave.

“Steve…”, your voice was timid as you began to climb out of bed, sheets tangling in your limbs as you moved through the soft material.

The mafia leader’s head turned in your direction, eyebrows raised with surprise at seeing you awake. Steve finished buttoning his crisp white shirt as he approached the edge of the bed where you waited on your knees, his large hand enclosing around yours as you reached for him. “Morning baby, lie back down and get some more sleep”, he encouraged, his voice rough from its first use of the day.

Your shoulders dropped as you took him in, not realising just how much you had missed him and Bucky, both of whom had deep purple circles around their eyes through exhaustion but you could tell that just from the way that they were standing. You’d originally intended to find out if they were staying, it was your birthday after all and even though all the promises of travelling and presents were no longer happening, seeing them actually preparing to leave was not what you had expected. Your gut twisted in despair, feeling overwhelming guilt at being so selfish for thinking this, they were going above and beyond for your protection and safety but right now, you just wanted them to rest or even just acknowledge that it was your birthday, just some form of normality.

“Are you both really going in? I feel like I’ve hardly seen either of you”, you swallowed down the hope, trying to reach further up Steve’s body to hold onto his shoulders, attempting to pull him close.

Steve smiled sadly down at you, fingers gently easing around your wrists to pull himself free of your grasp. “I know Sweetheart, I’m sorry. We’ve found a trail of his whereabouts near Manhattan that we’ve been scoping overnight. We just need to get this son of a bitch and we’ll return to happy families”. 

You knew he was trying to make you better but it only confirmed the reality that they were once again both leaving for the day, your birthday. Had they forgotten? Or was it not as much of a big deal anymore that you had a special day, a day that was only once a year? Yes, there was a threat against you but it wasn’t like they were both doing the surveillance, surely this one day one or both of them could stay.

“I don’t think we’ll be much longer”, Steve continued, easing your body back onto the bed. “Get some more sleep, maybe see if Sam wants to watch one of your movies later, and order some takeout, make sure you use my card”. Giving a chaste kiss on your forehead, he returned to his section of the wardrobe, pulling out a navy tie, wrapping it around his neck and exiting the bedroom.

Before you could allow the sadness to take over, Bucky was approaching, wearing the same outfit as Steve’s except the shirt and tie were both black. “We’ll be back before you know it Doll, get some more sleep, get enough for the both of us”, he tried to joke but the light didn’t reach his eyes as he too kissed your temple and walked out of the bedroom door.

They were actually leaving, without so much as a proper good morning kiss or a ‘how are you?’, let alone a happy birthday. Attempting to still keep the tears at bay, you were swift to climb out of bed, following them out of the bedroom and down the stairs, seeing them both already at the front door, preparing to leave.

“Can’t one of you stay today? Just for one day?” your voice was laced with desperation as you paced towards them, hands reaching to grip the back of Bucky’s shirt. The man sighed sadly, expecting this from you at some point, there was only so long you could be kept inside, not realising that you were also upset about them missing your birthday.

Bucky turned to rest his hands against the top of your arms, pulling you away slightly so he could look into your eyes. You had to quickly bite your lip to hide the quiver as more sadness rocked through you at seeing the sympathy in the crystal blue eyes looking down at you, already knowing that there wasn’t any way that either Bucky or Steve were planning on staying with you today. 

“Sorry honey, we really need to get this sorted so we can get back to normal. How about we call you later? Can have a catch-up then, how does that sound?”

A phone call. You’d been promised a holiday, surprises and most importantly, time with just Steve and Bucky without work interfering and now, all you were receiving on your birthday was a phone call.

“I miss you both”, your eyes flicked before both men as they looked down at you, hoping for something, any kind of hope that they would stay but you already knew nothing was going to happen. Steve leaned over Bucky first, kissing your cheek, waiting a moment for Bucky to do the same before twisting open the door handle.

Bucky moved you out of the way of the open door, keeping you hidden from the outside world, still trying to protect you as he also kissed your cheek quickly once more, “We miss you too, we’ll talk later. I love you”. You didn’t respond, too scared of completely breaking down and not even knowing what to really say. So to try and refrain from guilt-tripping them with your tears, you held your breath, the technique used to suppress your emotions.

Turning on the spot, Bucky followed after his boss, shutting and locking the front door behind him and then you were once again all by yourself.

The air you’d been holding rushed out of your lungs as you released a heavy sob, the tears openly flowing down your cheeks now. It was one of those cries where you were almost choking on your breaths, ribs aching from trying to keep control and not hyperventilate but it was no use.

You cried and cried. For the loneliness. The silence in the house. The lack of touch and affection that you were craving. Even forgetting your birthday, something as menial as this still had you feeling devastated. There was nothing Steve and Bucky ever forgot about you, always being their sole focus. But now, your protection had become an obsession to the point where they were almost neglecting you and even themselves, with minimal sleep, you weren’t even sure of the last conversation that you’d truly had with either of them.

You stayed on your knees at the front door for over an hour, curled up in a ball and releasing all of the pent-up emotions but now that you had started, you couldn’t stop. But as your knees started to ache against the solid oak flooring, you forced yourself to stand and get a hold of yourself.

This only meant instead of crying downstairs, you were now crying in your bedroom, the sheets pushed to the end of the bed and your body still curled into a ball. Not even bothering to catch the falling tears you allowed the front of your pyjama shirt to take the honours of being your makeshift tissue and become soaked through on your chest.

Eventually, your sobs subsided, your eyes red and sore and feeling exhausted from the lack of sleep and turmoil of emotions.

Then suddenly the front door was opened, your heart thundering in the small hopes of the boys returning but then your bodyguard, Sam Wilson’s voice shouted from the floor below. “Boss lady? Where you at?”

Was it already midday? Glancing at your phone that was next to the bed still, your eyes widen to see that hours had already passed by unnoticed by you. In a rush, you were out of bed, trying not to stumble on your weak knees from being in the squished position for so long, and quickly hiding in the en suite bathroom, locking the door for safe measure.

You didn’t want Sam to see you like this, so hiding was the best option, even as you continued to silently cry, having had your hopes spiked for a second that they’d remembered what day it was and once again being let down.

“Sweetheart? You in there?” Sam asked on the other side of the door.

Trying to steady your breathing, you responded and hoped that your voice didn’t crack or give away the fact that you had been crying all morning. “Yeah, won’t be long.”

“Good, I’ve got a special cake out here that’s dying to be eaten!” You could hear the joy in Sam’s smile as you leaned against the door, the cool wood soothing your slightly swollen face from the immense crying.

“Cake?” you asked in a small voice, nearly a whisper.

“Yeah, a cake! Wouldn’t be a proper birthday celebration without cake, am I right?”

“You remembered…”.

Sam frowned at the bathroom door, noting the sadness in your voice, instinctively he stepped closer, “Of course, I remembered sweetheart, is everything ok in there?”

Your lip wobbled as fresh tears began to coat your face, “no…”. There was no point hiding it, otherwise, you’d be stuck in the bathroom all day and you needed to be with someone, not wanting to waste any more time by yourself

Unlocking the bathroom door, you opened it slowly, peeking around it to see Sam standing there. In one hand he held a gift bag and the string to an oversized birthday balloon, and in the other hand, he held what looked to be a chocolate cake with your name written across in cursive white icing. The smile dropped on his face as he saw your distraught, quickly placing the objects in his hands onto one of the dressers, letting the balloon float to the ceiling and then he was wrapping his arms around you.

You were instantly sobbing into his chest, hands desperately grabbing his shirt scared that he might disappear and leave you like everyone else seemed to be doing.

Sam rested one hand against your back, rubbing soothing circles and the other on the back of your head, keeping you close to his chest, giving you the time to let your emotions out. “Shh it’s ok, I’ve got you, I’m not going anywhere”.

He was so comforting and calm, but then he always was. Bucky used to be this crutch for you in times like this as he was previously your bodyguard but as your relationship with him shifted, you ended up becoming close friends with Sam.

Sam had already deduced what was wrong, from his quick glance around the house downstairs and the on his way up, with the lack of decorations and that he knew Steve and Bucky had vacated the house first thing in the morning, they definitely had forgotten about your birthday.

“Take a deep breath for me, that’s it, and another one. Keep breathing for me, sweetheart. Can’t have you crying on your birthday now can I?” It took a few attempts but you were able to slowly calm your breathing down until only small hiccups remained.

Sam pulled back from the hug first, moving instead to duck his head and cup your cheeks, wiping away the tears that remained on your first.

You laughed in embarrassment, trying to hide your face but he didn’t allow it so you just held onto his wrists, feeling ashamed, especially as you saw the mess left behind on his shirt, cringing at the sight. “I’ve ruined your shirt, I’m sorry”.

“I don’t mind, makes me unique to everyone else”, he joked for a moment before becoming more series, his facial features relaxing in empathy. “Did they forget about today?”

You quickly bite your bottom lip, feeling the emotions stirring once more. “Yeah, but it’s... It’s fine! I know they’re busy trying to keep me safe but… I feel like I haven’t seen them in weeks. I hate being stuck in here! I mean, this is the first hug I’ve had since they received that stupid letter, they’ve spent so much time at the office and then tired when they get back and I’m asleep anyway so I never get to see them. I haven’t even kissed their lips in two weeks Sam!”

Once you started your ranting, it all just came flooding out. At first, you were tentative with what you were saying, that guilt still lingering in your gut but the more you thought about it, the angrier you were becoming. Yes, you were in danger but that didn’t mean they couldn’t come home and wake you up, kiss your lips or even hug you properly.

As you came to the end of your rant, you had to take a deep breath, completely filling your lungs with air and then breathing out through your mouth, feeling the tension easing throughout your body.

“Better?” Sam asked referring to your rant, you nodded your head in response. “Good, come on let's go and eat cake and have a chat”.

You were on your second slice of delicious cake, a happy smile on your face finally, chocolate always made you feel happy though. Sam chuckled at your appearance, filling your glass of water that you’d downed in a few glugs, not realising just how thirsty you were.

“I’m not going to try and make excuses for my bosses for the way they’ve been acting but speaking as their friend, they’re scared. Scared of losing you and I know you understand that but from the brief times that I’ve seen them outside or on the phone, I just think that they don’t want to spend too much time here because they don’t want to get their hopes up that everything is ok. You make them feel whole and safe so spending less time with you, it's taking away that security for them, maybe they don’t want to relax and have affection when that asshole is still out there. Now, don’t repeat this to them because I’d like to keep my job but it’s a dumb way to go about this all, clearly. I don’t think they realised just how long it would take to find whoever sent that message to you”.

Sam’s explanation made sense to you. Steve and Bucky had never hidden their intense love for you, and would constantly remind you that they would do absolutely anything to keep you safe. They were proving this now but spending every hour physically possible to find whoever was trying to find you but the small punishment to themselves that they couldn’t hug or even kiss wasn’t just a negative for them but for you as well. You needed them just as much as they needed you.

It was a pitiful circle and today had been the icing on top of the cake, ironically.

“That makes sense”, you responded after another thoughtful bite of chocolate cake, already eyeing up a third slice, you were starving after having no breakfast or lunch. “So what should I do? Leave them to it? What if they don’t find whoever is doing this for weeks? I don’t think I can go that long without seeing them properly but then I also don’t want to confront them if this is their way of coping.” You admitted with a deflated tone. Even though you wanted nothing more than to call them and tell them to come home and simply just kiss and hold you but then you didn’t want to complain when everything they were doing was for your benefit in the long run.

“Well why don’t we-”, Sam was cut off as his phone began to ring loudly from his pocket. Pulling the device out, he saw ‘BOSS’ written across the screen. “Say his name and he will appear”, he joked before stepping away to answer the phone, not stopping until he was outside with the back door closed so you couldn’t hear the phone call. You didn’t think anything of it, knowing that it was probably just an update about the day, the same phone call that was had every day.

Lifting the phone to his ear, Sam was about to talk when Steve was cutting him off, “We’ve got him”.

Sam’s shoulders dropped along with the heavy breath he released. “Are…are you sure?”

“Yeah, his handwriting matched the letter and with some persuasion from Buck, he admitted to it. Scumbags excuse was that was the golden ticket to get to me, well he was damn right about that” Steve growled into the phone and faintly in the background, the man in question was begging for his life as Bucky brutalised him, something he had been hoping to do for two weeks. “We’ve actually got that asshole, Sam!”

“Thank god”, Sam sighed in relief, rubbing his eyes, looks like everyone was going to be sleeping well tonight. 

“How is she?” Steve asked, a hint of hope in his voice.

Sam chewed on the inside of his cheek, thinking about his next words carefully. You had made it clear that you didn’t want them worrying about how sad you were but then on the other hand, he was your bodyguard, and your best interest was key. Also, they’d caught the guy so would be coming home to return to the normality they were all desperate for.

“Sam?” Steve asked with more authority, his shoulders squaring up as he glanced toward Bucky who had stopped his skilled knife movements to look back at him, wondering why Sam wasn’t answering.

“She’s not good, Boss”.

“And what do you mean by that?” Steve asked, storming out of the interrogation room and away from the asshole's ears, not wanting him to hear. Bucky followed swiftly behind, wanting to know what was wrong with his girl. “What do you mean not good?” Steve repeated, putting his phone on speaker so Bucky could hear.

Sam sighed again, tilting his head back to look at the sky before checking that the back door was still closed and you weren’t within earshot. “Listen, Boss, I understand you’ve been busy and I’m so fucking happy you’ve caught the bastard who threatened her but she’s not good. She’s been crying all day, it took nearly 10 minutes for me to calm her down as she was hyperventilating. She misses you both. She also does understand why you’ve both been reluctant to be around her and getting your hopes up for things being ok but god damn, I haven’t seen her cry like this in years.”

Steve and Bucky were overridden with guilt, not realising just how much they had been pushing you away with their desperation to find the guy responsible for this entire situation.

“That’s not the only thing…”, Sam continued with a tone of regret that he actually had to tell them this.

“Go on Sam”, Steve encouraged, it couldn’t get any worse, right?

“It’s her birthday today”. Sam had to pull his phone away from his ear as Bucky shouted ‘fuck!’ followed by the recognisable sounds of him punching the brick wall. There were hushed tones following this as Steve and Bucky furiously spoke to each other, frustrated with each other for forgetting the one day that they’d been looking forward to.

Eventually, Steve placed the phone against his ear, his voice clipped and determined, “Can you stay with her until we get back? I don’t think we’ll be here too much longer now anyway and just…”, he contemplated what to say for a moment. “Just tell her that we got the guy and we’re coming back and that we love her, please Sam?”

“Sure thing, Boss”. The phone line cut off as Steve hung up, following Bucky back into the room to finish the guy once and for all.

Sam entered your home, finding you tucking happily into your third slice of chocolate cake, fork pausing halfway to your mouth as you looked at the expression on your friend's face.

“What is it?” you asked nervously, placing the fork back onto the plate.

“They’ve got him, sweetheart”. 

It had been almost an hour since Sam had spoken those precious words to you and initially, it felt like you were going into shock, your bodyguard having to remind you to breathe again before it truly hit home. You were safe. They had actually found him and you were safe.

But now, you were sat just staring aimlessly at Sam thinking… what was going to happen now? Sam mentioned that the boys wouldn’t be back late and that they loved you and even though it gave you such peace in your heart to know this, there was still the underlying sadness. They’d still been ignoring you for weeks and forgotten your birthday, were you supposed to just carry on like this hadn’t happened?

There hadn’t really been a time in your relationship with them both where you’d actually been angry or upset by their actions so you were conflicted between wanting to celebrate and also remaining confident with your emotions of hurt.

Sam left you soon after to prepare de-escalation of the guards around your home and also give you the chance to have a long soak in the shower and prepare for their return. You’d ask him what you should do and he encouraged you to do what you felt was best which you only realised was an answer to cover his own back to not being fired, of which he laughed at, saying you were correct.

After showering and pampering yourself, the nerves returned, souring your mood once more. What did you wear? Did you dress up and greet them at the door? Did you wallow in self-pity in your bedroom?

But then the sight of Sam’s balloon and present caught your eye. It was your birthday, the one day a year when you actually wanted it to be all about you and here you were panicking.

Fuck. It.

You weren’t going to waste the remainder of the day, you didn’t need to be lost in your guilt and you for sure were going to have some damn fun before the consequences of the past few weeks came crashing down.

Finding something comfortable to wear which consisted of grey pyjama shorts and an old white t-shirt of Steve’s. Then you returned downstairs, linking your phone to the TV to play your music - loud.

One glass of wine turned into two and with the music, you were lost in the distraction, becoming increasingly more at ease and free, letting your body sway with the song. As each song played, you became more carefree, eventually dancing around the living room, the happy hum of alcohol in your veins, your throat aching with how loud you were singing the words.

Every thought of the past few weeks were diminisheds, until it felt like you were being watched from where you were currently standing on the couch, arms in the air, careful not to spill your wine in your one hand. Turning towards the door, your arms dropped down, breathing heavily as Steve and Bucky watched your happiness with smiles that could only be described as unfiltered love.

Neither of you was sure whether to approach the other, just staring for a few beats of the song before you stepped off of the couch and pausing the music, the silence deafening and unsettling enough that you were swift to down the rest of your wine for courage.

For a moment, you looked between Steve and Bucky, at their handsome faces, the overwhelming sensation to run into their arms almost taking over your body as you stepped forward but you stopped yourself abruptly. Deciding to stare at the spot on the floor and before fully thinking through your words, you began to spill everything you’d been holding in for two weeks.

“I’m… I’m so thankful to you both, for always putting me first and finding the person who was threatening me but I can’t pretend that these past two weeks haven’t been horrible and I need to tell you both now before I lose my courage. I understand why you’ve kept me hidden away but please, don’t ever shut me out like that again. We’re supposed to be in a relationship, one that is open about our emotions and supportive but I’ve hardly seen you in two weeks and you’ve not even given me the opportunity to ask how you both are because you’re both gone again at the crack of dawn and-”

You could feel your emotions rising again so taking a steadying breath, you looked up at the both again, “I do appreciate everything you have ever done for me and I love you both so much but, I can’t ever have a repeat of these last two weeks again, we’re a team please remember that before you decide to do things in my best interest when it’s going to be negative on all of us”.

Finishing everything that you wanted to say, your gut twisted with unease as neither said anything at first but Steve finally stepped forward. You straightened your spine as he approached, clutching the hem of your t-shirt to hide your trembling fists, keeping your eyes on his, not entirely sure what to expect until he standing only a couple of inches in front of you, your neck aching from having to look up at his taller stature.

Then he was dropping lower and lower until he was on his knees before you, eyes full of remorse, hands rising to cup around your wrists, gently prying your hands away from your shirt so that he could kiss the backs of them before resting his forehead on them.

“I’m so sorry my love, I don’t want to come up with excuses as to our behaviour these past two weeks but I think obsession and delirium from lack of sleep have caused us both to only want to find this guy and in the process have ignored you which was never our intentions. It’s just that… I can’t lose you-”, Steve’s voice cracked with pure emotions and it took everything within you to not collapse to your knees and hug him.

“I know, I can’t lose you either, both of you!” you emphasised, looking between the top of Steve’s head and Bucky whose emotions were written all over his face, regret, sadness and love.

“Tell us what we need to do, for you to forgive us”, Bucky finally spoke, taking a few steps forward and joining Steve on his knees in front of you, hands lifting to rest on your hips.

Here you were, with the leader of the Rogers Mafia Gang and the Second-In-Comand, both on their knees, looking as if you’d just ripped their hearts out and stamped on it, begging for your forgiveness.

“Just promise me you’ll talk to me next time, don’t ever shut me out”.

Steve finally looked up, the whites of his eyes shaded slightly red from his raw emotions, making sure to look you directly in the eye, “I promise, on everything I love, on you, Buck, the entire gang, that I will never make you feel this way ever again”. Your shoulders sagged in relief at his words, raising your hand to cup the side of his head as Bucky also promise his life that this would never happen again.

“I’ve missed you”, your voice was thick with emotions as you finally dropped lower, desperately kissing Steve and then Bucky on the lips. You consistently moved from one to the other, desperate, emotional kisses that were long, breathless and hard. Concentrating on every little feel, smell and taste of them both, a hand on each of their shirts, gripping tightly scared that they would move away. But they didn’t, they stayed and put as much passion into their touches and kisses as you did until all three of you collapsed back into the couch.

You were extremely breathless, greedily sucking in air as your head rested against Steve’s chest and feet over Bucky’s lap, all three of your lips were swollen from the bruising kisses, arms trapping your body into theirs.

The feeling of contentment was strong as the three of you just stayed like that for a while, your body feeling light enough that you could have fallen asleep but suddenly Bucky shifted slightly, sitting forward on the couch so you could see his face.

“That’s not the only apology we need to be making today, honey”, Bucky stated, lifting your daintier hand up to his lips, kissing each of your fingertips before rubbing his cheek against your palm. “We’re sorry for forgetting your birthday, there are no excuses for this, my love, we’re sorry”.

“It’s ok, I know you’ve been busy”.

“No, there aren't any excuses, you shouldn’t be so forgiving with us”, Steve mumbled against your temple, his lips soft and plump against your skin. “We need to make it up to you and even though our original plans are out of the window, we’ll start tonight and first thing in the morning tomorrow, we’re getting on that plane and getting out of here”.

You couldn’t help the grin that spread across your face, feeling excited about the plans tomorrow but then you contemplated his words a bit more, sitting up slightly in his embrace so you could look him in the eye.

“What do you plan on starting tonight?”

Something flashed in Steve’s eyes, almost as if the iris had darkened, momentarily they dropped to look at your mouth before looking back into your own eyes.

“We have a very long list of ways to beg for our forgiveness and make it up to you”, Bucky then responded for Steve. Looking at the hulking man now, you could see that he too was looking between your lips and eyes, almost like he was ready to eat you whole. “And…we aren’t going to stop until you say the words ‘I forgive you’.

Words seemed to fail you for a moment as you knew what they were planning, knew from the hardening lumps in their laps, the suggestive glances with their eyes and oh the wicked words he was saying. Bucky was giving you the ultimate power, all you could want for as long as you wanted until saying those words and the thrill of being able to have sort of control had your insides clenching in arousal.

They moved almost as one as if they shared the same mind as each article of clothing was removed by your body, freeing you of the confines of the material. The two men remained fully clothed but loosened their ties and unbuttoned the top button.

Steve and Bucky then proceeded to utterly worship every inch of your skin and body. It was almost overwhelming with knowing where to aim your attention, with Bucky nibbling on your thighs or Steve licking the column up your neck. Your body heated at the touches, their hands stroking areas where their mouths had vacated, mixing between kissing, sucking and licking depending on how sensitive the area they were located. Then their teeth would graze you and cause your breath to stick in your throat in an attempt to beg and moan for more.

You wanted to touch them too, missing the way their muscles and abnormally warm skin felt under your soft fingertips, but for now, you were more than content with having their sole focus be on you. Savouring every sensation they had to offer, even down to the way their facial hair roughly scratches your delicate skin, only to be soothed by their wicked tongues.

Then Steve’s huge body is hovering over your mouth, lips only an inch away from touching yours once more but the glint in his eye, he was in the mood to tease as you tried to lean up to kiss him, only to have him move away, staying that torturous distance away. “Please kiss me”, you’re pathetically begging, already giving in to the desperation, wanting more than just his warm breath on your face that smelt vaguely of the coffee he’d downed earlier.

Steve’s full lips form into a smirk, fingers gracing over the skin of your shoulders, eyes subtly glancing towards Bucky where you can feel him kiss against your inner knee.

“I want to taste you”. Steve’s statement was said in such a smokey tone that your hips rolled just to be near that beautiful mouth of his.

Your boyfriends swapped places around your body. Bucky held up your upper half against his chest as Steve settled between your thighs already had a light soaking of your juices caused by their well-skilled foreplay. Watching Steve closely, admiring his handsome face for a moment as a slither of his blonde hair draped into his eyes, you wish you could have kissed him again, tell him how much you loved him but his next words had your thoughts consumed with something else.

“Do you want my fingers or my tongue?”

You released a heavy breath, mouth hanging open contemplating between the two before the smartest answer finally tumbled from your lips, “both”.

Steve seemed to like that answer as his face descended, along with his right arm. Not that you could see as Bucky then tilted your head back against his chest, dipping down slightly to thoroughly kiss you, tongue pushing between your lips, completely dominating you.

Bucky then absorbed every single moan and gasp into the kiss as Steve’s tongue delved through your folds, licking a strip the entire length, tasting your beautiful juices that he’d been craving for the past two weeks. As one tongue distracted you, whether it was your mouth or cunt, then the other would be stroking a certain nerve that had you twitching and praising the men surrounding you. Steve began to concentrate on your bundle of nerves, firming the tip of his tongue to move it in a slow, methodical circle before flattening his entire tongue and licking against it.

Your hands wound into his hair and with the scrunched-up position, your elbows pushed your breasts together, something Bucky noticed from the corner of his eye, his nimble fingers reaching around you to perk the nipples, tugging at the same time as Steve sucking your clit for a few seconds. You forgot just how much you loved the feeling of his metal fingers, so cold against the sensitive bud that he twisted and pulled.

Bucky pulled back from the kiss, wanting to hear the noises you were going to make and, seeing Steve’s fingers moving to tease your hole, circling the entrance a few times before pushing two of his rough long fingers within. “Ahhhh!” You groaned, back arching slightly wanting Bucky’s hands to cup your tits more whilst also, holding Steve close against your pussy.

“I will never get enough of you”, Bucky rasped, his eyes almost hungry as he continued to look down at your body wrapped in his arms.

You held his eye contact, feeling the coil tightening in your abdomen. “Don’t stop”, you choked, body tensing as Steve’s fingers steadily moved in and out, matching the strokes of his tongue.

The mafia boss chuckles, releasing your clit momentarily, “Oh baby, I’m going to fuck you until you’re too tired to even speak”.

The promise in his tone had you feeling such an intense thrill that your walls clamped down harshly around his fingers as you came hard, hips rolling against his face, Bucky also continuing to squeeze and play with your tits until the waves of pleasure subsided. The three of you remained in place, both men giving you a moment to catch your breath, enjoying the post-orgasm glow that graced your expression.

Then they were both moving, you weren’t sure where they were going at first until Bucky began to lie across the couch in the same position as Steve with your legs thrown over his shoulder and Steve was sitting behind you, holding you in an upright position. They’d swapped places and all you could do was look down at Bucky with wide eyes as he looked directly at your sopping cunt, “It’s my turn to taste, oh how I’ve missed this”.

He then swooped in to do exactly as he stated, his mouth devouring your cunt just as much as he had your mouth, his warm fingers pushing into your tight cunt, teasing the spongey spot within. Then Steve was tilting your head back with a firm grip on your jaw, biting his lower lip in anticipation before he too was taking your breath away as his mouth crashed into yours.

You could taste yourself on his lips, the scent of coffee completely gone and this revelation caused your body to heat further, finding it thrilling with how much of your juices he truly had lapped up. Steve’s big hands were then rubbing against your breasts, squishing them before teasing the nipples, each movement causing sparks of pleasure to go directly in between your legs to where Bucky was eating you out.

Your fingers were already in his hair, holding him there and helping to roll your hips against his face. You were already a little sensitive from the first orgasm, embarrassed to say that your second orgasm was already building with increasing pace, thighs trembling as you tried to not squish Bucky’s head.

It took only a few minutes and your eyes were rolling back, face dropping slightly, stopping the kiss from Steve so you could moan Bucky’s name. Your pussy clenched repeatedly around his fingers as he teased you through the entire orgasm, only stopping when your hips were jolting with overstimulation.

Bucky didn’t wait for you to catch your breath now however as he sat up on his knees, both arms wrapping around your body to pick you up, manhandling your body with ease. A second later, you found yourself kneeling on the couch on wobbly thighs, your body leaning over the back as Bucky pushed gently on your shoulders, forcing your arse to lift into the air. 

Unsure where Steve was for a second but then you didn’t care as Bucky pushed two of his fingers back into your cunt, his large body standing directly behind you. He begins to fuck you, in and out with his fingers, positioned at his pelvis so from the front it looks like he was fucking you, and oh he was getting to that part soon but he just wanted to see you cum one more time before that.

The muscles in his arm flexed beneath his black shirt as he began to fuck you quickly with his fingers, your body automatically rolling back to meet him halfway.

“Do you like fucking my fingers?” Bucky huskily asks, staring down with wide eyes, the pupils looking almost completely black with lust.

“Yes, they feel so fucking good”, you responded, holding desperately onto the back of the couch.

Bucky held onto your hips, squatting slightly to have a better view of your cunt before he began to curl his fingers, gently tugging on them with each thrust, massaging directly against your g-spot. “That’s it, hot mama, let go for me”, he encouraged, knowing exactly what he was doing with his special trick as splashes of fluid began to squirt out of you, coating his arm and the couch but neither of you cared.

Your body was convulsing, thighs struggling to hold up your weight as Bucky was now fully kneeling on the floor again, his tongue sticking out to its fullest length to try and catch any of your squirts, groaning as flecks of liquid coated him.

You were cumming through this entire moment, the sounds of the sloshing from your cunt caused my Bucky’s fingers were like music to Steve’s ears as he watched you completely explode through your orgasm.

This time, Bucky allowed you a few moments to gather your bearings, gasping for air as you tried to sit up more, your arm and head hanging off the edge of the couch as Bucky licked his fingers clean.

You were exhausted that much was true but you’d been so touch-deprived over the last few weeks that you couldn’t help but beg for more. “I want you to fuck me”, you sighed over your shoulder at Bucky.

The man smirked devilishly, taking his sweet time to undress completely, also giving you just that little extra time to gather your senses, trying to ignore the wet feeling under your knees from where you’d soaked the couch.

Then there were suddenly hands on your hips, helping to push you back up as a long thick cock was rubbing at your entrance. “Bucky…”, you sighed as finally, his cock was stretching your cunt, the sensation was so much more intense after the long wait and thorough foreplay.

“Fuck, you’re taking me so well, Doll”, Bucky praised as you took most of his cock, there still being an inch that never seemed to fit.

A hand began to stroke a gentle touch across your cheek as Steve was suddenly in front of you. As Bucky began to fuck you with long, strong strokes, Steve caressed your phase in a praising manner, letting you know he was there and even giving his thumb to suck on, the stimulation of which was causing your cunt to clench around Bucky.

Reaching out with a lazy hand, you attempted to grab Steve’s belt, wanting more than just his thumb to suck, no, in fact, you could definitely say, you needed to suck on his cock right now.

However, you groaned in annoyance as Steve pushed away your hand. “No, I’m supposed to be making you feel good”, he informed you as his large hand moved down your naked spine.

“But I want your cock so bad, please, I won’t ask for anything else ever again”, you exaggerated, knowing it was a complete lie.

Steve did too, even though he relented as he stood to his full height, “ok, Baby”. His fingers which were once inside of you, were now swiftly unbuttoning his shirt and undoing his belt and you watched in fascination as he began to undress. Fuck, his body was unbelieve, just as Bucky’s was over your shoulder. But then, all thoughts disappeared from your mind as you were suddenly eye level with the veiny, red hard cock of Steve, his voice low as he commanded, “Open your mouth for me”.

You do as instructed instantly, earning a soft stroke against your cheek in praise before he was resting his heavy tip against your tongue. His salty taste splashed around in your mouth, you swallowed harshly, wanting to taste more of him as you held your weight up with one hand, and the other gripped the base of his cock.

All the whilst, Bucky continued with his deep thrusts that also caused you to jolt forward, almost like he was doing the work for both of you as with each one, you were taking Steve deeper into your mouth. Your warm tongue was teasing the underside of his cock, taking special time to stroke against the area under the tip that had Steve gasping and holding the back of your head.

There were so many sensations going through you that you hadn’t even noticed that your eyes were closed until Steve spoke once more. “Let me see those eyes”.

Once again you did as instructed, opening your eyes to look at Steve. His eyes were flicking between what your mouth was doing and also watching the area where his friend was fucking into you.

“You look so good beneath me”, Bucky grunted, slapping his hips harder into you, his hold on your hips almost bruising but the mix of pleasure and pain was blissful. You gagged around Steve’s cock as he hit the back of your throat with the powerful thrust from Bucky, your eyes were instantly watering but Steve was quick to wipe away any tears that fell, whispering sweet praises down at you.

This was when Bucky licked his own thumb and began pressing it against your asshole, not pushing in straight away but allowing the momentum of his thrusts to slowly inch its way in. With the way you began to moan, the sensation vibrating around Steve’s cock, he knew you were loving it. Finally, his thumb slipped in and he stayed there, resting his other fingers on your lower back and almost using this as his grip to fuck you.

“You like sucking on his cock whilst I take you from behind?” Bucky asked, knowing you couldn’t verbally answer with your mouth full of Steve but the brunette smirked when he heard you groan in pleasure.

“You are doing so well”, Steve continued with his praises, the apples of his cheeks pink, mouth gaped open, releasing moans between his words. Bucky could feel you were adjusting well to his thumb, pulling it out and replacing it with the two fingers that he had been fucking you with earlier.

You felt so full in every hole, the sensation near overwhelming as you couldn’t prepare for the orgasm that consumed you. It took your breath away so much that you had to pull your face back and off of Steve’s cock to suck in air, a thin strip of drool connecting your lips with the tip of Steve’s glistening tip. “Oh baby, you’re drooling everywhere”.

Bucky had also paused his thrusts now, letting you calm down from the orgasm and the way your cunt was twitching around him, he nearly shot his load already. Attempting to sit up further on your knees, you looked up at Steve with a cock-drunk expression, eyes glazed, lips swollen and chin covered in spit.

“I want you both”.

Steve cupped your face, smiling slightly at you already forgetting about your declaration only moments ago that you wouldn’t ask for anything else. “Baby girl, we haven’t prepped you and it’s been nearly two weeks, you won’t be able to take us both”.

You make an annoyed face, “I can take it please! Please don’t say no to me!”.

Steve looks at Bucky over your shoulder, seeing what he thought about it and with the distraction, you purposefully clenched your cunt around Bucky’s cock, causing the man to curse and grip the globe of your arse in a firm grip.

“We’ll try but it if it hurts, we’re stopping”, Steve finally decided for the three of you and you couldn't be more thrilled, displaying a shit-eating grin across your face. Bucky was the first to move, snaking an arm around your waist and swapping the two of your position so that he was now sitting on the couch and you were practically sitting in his lap, your sweat-covered back against his toned abs.

Bucky was able to easily hold up your legs as the two of you watched Steve walk around the couch and stand between your legs.

Holding out two fingers under your mouth, you smiled before spitting onto his fingers. He smirked at your obedience, moving the wet fingers down to your asshole, and seeing as Bucky didn’t have a spare hand, he gripped his member, guiding it to your wet hole.

“Nice and slow”, Steve encouraged Bucky and you, watching your expression for any signs of pain as well as any tension that arrived in your body. However thankfully, you were so thoroughly aroused and had to couple of fingers from Bucky that it wasn’t painful. It did still take your breath away with how far you were being stretched but once he was past the thickened part of the tip, the rest slid in fine, even being able to take that extra inch with this position.

It was intense and you were thankful for the time they both gave you to adjust your ass was fluttering around Bucky as it tried to go back to its original size. “You’re doing so good for me”, Bucky breathes into your ear, kissing just below, showing his appreciation to you.

You nod to show that you’re good to carry on and Steve is lifting one leg next to Bucky’s hip on the couch, using it to position himself and gently ease his cock into your eagerly awaiting cunt, your juices naturally lubing his path.

The two of them began slow, mostly with Steve doing all of the thrustings, the sensation of his cock brushing against your walls and brushing against Bucky’s, even with there being a barrier, was enough to have you all moaning. But then Bucky began to tilt his hips up slightly, still holding up your legs in the process.

You’d felt full before but now, you were being stretched in all of the right places. Your hands rested around Steve’s waist, nails digging into his back as he moved at a steady pace, even though you didn’t need much prepping, you weren’t such that a hard fucking whilst being double penetrated would have been the best option right now.

Especially as with his perfectly timed strokes, you could feel every single drag of his cock along your walls and the way he rolled his hips meant that his pelvis brushed your clit. It was more than euphoric, feeling like you were constantly at the height of orgasm with everything being so stretched.

“Fuck, look at you, taking both of us like a good girl. Do our cocks feel good baby?” Steve asked in between pants, his body gleaming with sweat as he was trying to hold back his own orgasm but already knew he wasn’t going to last much longer.

“Yes! Feels so good”, you babble, lead lolling back against Bucky’s shoulder, loving the feeling of being sandwiched between their hard bodies. “Want you both to cum inside of me”.

Hearing such dirty words from your mouth had them both groaning deeply, their thrusts deepening slightly, Steve’s hand now resting gently against your throat so all you could do was look up at him.

Bucky came first, his fingers tightening around the hold on your legs as his thighs tensed beneath you, hips fucking up once more, “ah fuck!”, was all he was able to grunt as he coated your asshole in his cum.

Steve fucked you a little harder as he stopped holding back his own orgasm, his lips parting, “Gonna fill you up baby, fuck - yes!” You didn’t stop the eye contact as Steve came, his eyebrows furrowing as he too stilled, his cock hardening with each spurt of his seed, it spilling out around his cock and dripping into Bucky’s lap.

Your body felt completely useless as Bucky eased out, more cum dripping out and mixing with Steves, and gently he simply moved you onto his lap, cuddly you close, keeping you warm as you all attempted to catch your breath.

A smile crept onto your face however as one thing came to mind.

“I forgive you both”, you admitted and truthfully, you’d forgiven them the moment they had dropped to their knees in front of you but it was nice for them to give you the opportunity to decide when you’d forgiven them. They both kissed your temple, smiling against your skin.

“Happy birthday”, they both whispered, causing you to chuckle at the late hour at which they were saying it but at least they didn’t completely miss the day.

Steve reached to the floor, picked up his trousers and found his phone, checking the time, not quite realising just how late it now was.

“Let’s get you to bed, we have an early start in the morning”, he informed the two of you as he began to stand.

Glancing down at your body, you tried to move your legs but all they did was tremble as you still hadn’t the full sensation back from how hard you’d been fucked. “I don’t think I’m going to be able to walk in the morning”, you joked to them both.

Steve chuckled, bending down and placing one arm under your knees and the other supporting your back, lifting you up and into his arms. “That’s fine with me, I wasn’t planning on you walking anywhere over the next few days, I’ll just carry you on the plane”.

You smiled giddily at his words, arms circling around his neck, feeling fucked and dazed as he carried you up to the bedroom, Bucky smiling at you over Steve’s shoulder as the three of you returned to the comfort of your own bed.

[rebelliousstories]

Old Habits

Relationship: Austin Butler x Reader

Fandom: Austin Butler RPF

Request: No

Warnings: Fluff, Angst, Insecurites

Word Count: 1,386

Main Masterlist: Here

Austin butler Masterlist: Here

Summary: Preparing for his new film, Austin starts to freak out once his voice starts slipping.

Waking up in the morning, with birds chirping and the sun shining, Austin was happy to wake up and see her face. There was very little that brought him joy quite like waking up to that image. Sunlight beaming down and her eyelashes tickling her cheeks. She looked so peaceful just lying there, in one of Austin’s shirts. Her breath fanned out across his bare chest, and he unfortunately had to get up to start his day.

With great difficulty, he set his girl back down on her pillow and went to get ready. Austin’s shower was heating up while he brushed his teeth. Smaller arms wrapped around his torso while he was rinsing his mouth, and he chuckled. Spitting the last bit of water out, he shut off the faucet and turned to face his lover.

“Good morning, baby. You awake?” He questioned, letting her fall into his chest again with a sleepy yawn. Austin chuckled, and set to rubbing her back for a brief second.

“Want to shower with me?” She nodded, and let her boyfriend take the shirt off before he moved to his own clothing. They stepped underneath the stream together, and took turns washing and rinsing. No words were spoken, but there was no need for them to. Austin stayed underneath to wash his hair while she stepped out to go get ready. Afterwards, he stepped out after turning the shower off, and slung the towel across his hips.

Austin was busy applying product to his hair as he heard rustling in the next room over. They switched places for her to do her hair and makeup while he got into his clothing. His eyes drifted over to the bathroom periodically to watch her. She was just finishing up when Austin slipped on his shoes. Reaching into his bedside drawer, his gold chain, and ring was placed on, followed shortly by his watch. His lover came over and placed a kiss to his forehead so as to not disturb his hair.

“Gotta go to a table read today, baby. I’ll be home by dinner. Think about where you want to go. I’m treating us tonight.” He said with certainty, kissing his girl and gathering the rest of his things.

“Okay, hun. I’ve just got to get some stories run by the office and then I should be home by four at the latest. I love you.” She pressed another kiss to his lips, and giggled as she rubbed the lipstick off. Grabbing a bag, her wallet and keys, she rushed out the door with a final farewell out of the door. Austin smiled, and turned his attention to gathering his own things, but paused when he saw the photo of them on his nightstand.

It was from the premiere of Elvis a few years ago where they had announced their relationship for the world. She had worked as a story developer for the movie industry, and it just so happened that she was working on Elvis this time around. Her presence was usually on set in some form or another, meaning that Austin spent a lot of time around her. A three year long process had cultivated in a phenomenal performance, and an incredible relationship.

He had offered to make her his plus one to the premiere, and she had shown up in a gorgeous 50’s style evening dress that matched his suit to a tee. Ever since then, they had been so happy. There were highs and lows, just like every relationship, but they always came out stronger together. The script he was reading for was a new movie about a biker gang from the 60’s; The Bikeriders. It was always a fun challenge doing a period piece for him, but he was certain that this was going to be a great film to make. At least, that is what he hoped for.

The rest of the day passed without a hitch for her. It was a normal work day. She was biding her time until she could officially clock out and get home to get ready for her date with her lover. As soon as the clock hit four, she packed up her desk, clocked out, and practically ran out of the door. The car ride home was filled with anticipation for the night ahead, but when she pulled in, confusion hit her hard. Austin’s car was already parked in the driveway. He was supposed to be home later than her, not before.

Making her way inside, she cautiously set down her bag and keys before searching the rooms. Nothing in the living room, nor the kitchen. However, pushing open the bedroom door, she was met with a pitiful sight. Austin was curled up on top of the covers in a fetal position. Softly kicking her shoes off, she made her way over to the bed and placed a hand on her lover.

“Aus, honey, what are you doing here?” She cooed softly. The man did not respond for a minute, but turned to lay in her lap without a word.

“Oh sweetheart, what’s going on? What happened?” Once more she tried to get a response out of him, but her words died when she saw the tears that stained his face. He grasped at her clothing and buried his face into her top as a tear fell out. She ran one hand up and down his back, and the other through his hair in an attempt to soothe him.

“Is it anything that I can help with? I gotta know, Austin.” Once he was able to calm himself, Austin turned out of her to face his girl. His head was still in her lap, but now he could gaze up at her.

“It’s nothin’ that you can help with.” His words choked up as he spoke, and fresh tears ran down his face.

“What happened?” She pressed again.

“I… I went to go do the script read. We were all sittin’ round the table and, my voice. It just- it slipped. And I can’t get it back, baby. Nothin’ is workin’.” He wailed, scrubbing his hands over his face. The longer he talked, the more she understood what had caused her boyfriend to become so upset.

“Elvis came back out, didn’t he?” Austin confirmed her theory with a nod, and more tears ran down his face. They were starting to stain her legs beneath, but neither one cared too much about that.

“Did you call your coach?”

“He ain’t available right now.”

“Honey, look at me,” her hands removed his from his face, “we’ll get through it. Just like we did last time. But hey, you stayed in that voice for three years. You’re going to have slip ups now and again. It’s natural. It’s just a minor set back. You’ll be okay.”

“And what if I can’t? What if I can’t get tried of it this time? I don’t know who I am when it slips in.” Austin lamented. While they did not fall, tears remained in his eyes as he thought about the alternative.

“Then we’ll get through it like last time. We’ll find a way to get around it. I’m not letting you be helpless during this, honey. Believe me, please.” She comforted her lover, who finally was able to crack a smile for the first time in hours.

“There’s my man. Such a pretty smile on such a pretty face.” The blush that came across his face made him turn to hide it, which caused her to giggle as she tried to turn him to see his face again.

“Now, do you still wanna go have dinner, or do you wanna stay in?” He rubbed his face again and laid down on his back once more. Austin chuckled out a breath, and sniffled lightly.

“Wanna go to that diner on fifth? I could use a burger and a milkshake.” Leaning down, she pressed a kiss to his lips and patted his chest upon her ascent.

“Let’s do it. Gotta change my clothes though.” Austin rolled off and watched as his lover picked out a new set of clothes, and disappeared into the bathroom. All he could think about in that moment, was how lucky he was to have a lover and partner like her.

[kriffingstars]

Johnny MacTavish; the other man

pairing: Johnny MacTavish x Price!Reader summary: The MacTavish sisters take things into their own hands, and Johnny gets jealous warnings: verrrrrry slight age gap (I imagine reader to be around 20, Johnny is 26), tiniest bit of angst if you squint a/n: i hope this makes up for the lack of follow up, once again asks are always open. if you want to be added to the tags just let me know :) enjoy my beauties

None of the boys are particularly fond of the more ceremonial side of being in the military. The uniforms are too hot, itchy and Gaz has already complained about the way the trousers are splitting him in half.

The nice aspect of it, is that they get to show their families a small part of what they do, even if it’s a carefully constructed show with lots of procedure.

Price can see you mingling with a few of the other soldier’s families. You’ve always been the most personable of the Price’s, taking your mother’s kindness and magnifying it tenfold.

Currently you’re in deep conversation with two ginger girls, the three of you chatting animatedly. Price feels himself smiling as he watches you, he doesn’t really get to see this side of you very often, all your cousins are much younger, and you rarely bring friends round to the house. He’s told you many times, you’re not just a guest, it’s your home and he expects you to treat it as such.

You know it’s your home, but you also see how your Uncle is with new people, and you like to keep the sanctity of your home just that. A sanctity.

“You know you’d be perfect for my brother, he needs someone with a head on their shoulders,” Maisie mentions, switching their conversation in a complete one-eighty.

“Ah, maybe.”

It’s only awkward for you, Maisie and Amelia have no clue that you were in fact sleeping with said brother, not even three weeks ago, and spent most of the time in between texting him.

“He’d be head over heels for you trust me,” is all that Amelia adds to the conversation. From the twenty-minute conversation you’ve had with the two MacTavish girls, you’d learnt Amelia was the older of the two, and slightly more reserved than the youngest, Maisie.

If you thought Johnny was out-going, he had nothing on his baby sister. All big smiles, loud laughs with the biggest heart.

You can see what Johnny says when he tells you he has his work cut out, being the protective older brother.

Maisie’s energy is infections, and her comments about her brother’s potential affections are quickly forgotten as she moves the conversation onto this new band she’s been listening to. Before you know it she’s added a few of their songs to your playlist and you’ve promised to text her what you think of them.

The shrill sound of a bugle cuts off the conversation between the three of you, noting the start of the ceremony and presentation.

It’s nice to see three of the four men parading in all the finery. Ghost for good reason isn’t there, you figured that his mask is not part of the official uniform. You sigh, thinking how it must be a shame that the man can’t be included in the festivities.

The man in question doesn’t, he’s currently in his sweats enjoying the peace and quiet and reading his book, lounging in the now quiet rec room.

Your Uncle sneaks you a subtle smile across the square when you catch his eye. Your face beaming back at him brings him a joy he’ll never admit to.

He knows you’re not his daughter, but you might as well be. He’s resigned himself to the fact that he’ll never have kids, he’s getting older and no closer to meeting someone to spend his life with.

He doesn’t mind. His time at home is spent catching up with old friends, and enjoying your company. You’ve been confused as his daughter a few times in the village and he hasn’t bothered to correct them as of late. He knows you don’t mind, you go as far as calling him your third parent, yes, it’s mainly in jest, but the sentiment is there.

By the time the service is over, all the family and friends in attendance descend on the square to take photos and congratulate the people they’re here for.

You and the two women in tow, make your way over to the three men, lost in conversation over Gaz’s continuous complaints about just how uncomfortable he is.

“Johnny!” is all the older man hears before the Scotsman is out of his vision, being nearly bowled over by a flaming red head flying at break-neck speed.

Soap’s spinning the girl in a circle as he laughs with her, over something inaudible to him.

This time it’s your turn to congratulate John, as he pulls you into his side, checking that you weren’t too bored and laughing when you say how impressive he was.

A call of your name breaks the quiet conversation the two of you are having, it’s Amelia beckoning you over two where the three MacTavish’s are standing.

“This is Johnny, honestly you two would be great together, I think you would really get along,” Maisie butts in again, wiggling her eyebrows as she mentions the getting along.

Oh the irony of the whole situation. Thank god Uncle John can’t see your face because there’s currently a shit eating grin adorning your face.

Johnny’s spluttering, his sisters take this as him being astounded by the woman that’s in front of him, you know better. His eyes aren’t glued to yours, he’s looking slightly behind you, where no doubt your Uncle is glowering at him.

Usually he’d step in, but he’s heard stories about both of Soap’s sisters and there’s no way he’s facing their wrath. He knows how tormented Soap is by the two of them on the daily, even when he’s in a different country. He doesn’t trust that the two of them would turn their focus towards him for interfering in true love.

“We’re going out for dinner later, you should join us!” is the next thing that’s uttered and you try to make your excuses, how you’re actually already going for dinner with the man stood behind you, bit it’s too late.

Fortunately, or unfortunately (it depends on who you ask), John gets invited along too, which is how you find yourself at dinner in a nice country pub as a five, instead of two.

You’re conveniently sat next to Johnny, whilst his two sisters bombard John with questions, many of which are brushed off with a quick ‘I can’t answer that I’m afraid’ but he makes up with plenty of stories of all the times Soap has done something stupid on base, and a few stories from deployments.

“This is not the kind of dinner I was talking about,” Johnny murmurs to you, when he notices his sisters have his CO distracted.

That earns him a gentle slap to his stomach as he laughs at the incredulous look plastered on your face.

“You look beautiful,” is how he follows up his comment, drinking in the way you look in the dim light of the pub.

“So do you, I mean handsome, I mean not that you aren’t beautiful,” you reply stumbling over your words, because god, the tension is palpable.

His hand finds yours underneath the table, stroking slowly over your knuckles, as he decides to finally save Price from his sisters’ rambling.

You’re surprised at how good he is at keeping his cool, you’re sure your face is radiating so much heat that everyone else at the table can feel it.

You’re also surprised at how much you like the thrill, maybe it’s just because Johnny is holding your hand, or maybe its the fact that you know you’re doing everything your Uncle told you not to.

You take a moment to think about how different things could be if John was supportive of the two of you. Maybe you’d actually be dating the man sat on your left, and you’d be holding his hand above the table, maybe his arm would be slung around the back of your chair as you lean into him. He’d toy with your hair slightly, to keep himself from being too distracted from the conversation he was engaged in.

You’d leave the pub hand-in-hand, stealing kisses from each other, as you walked behind the rest of the guests. They’d all be staying in the house with you all. John would make up the sofa bed for Johnny’s sisters, and you’d fall into bed together, stealing kisses and whispering sweet nothings.

You’re snapped out of your daydream by Amelia asking if you’re currently seeing anyone, a mischievous glint in her eye.

“Oh…not really,” is all you can manage, embarrassed to be interrupted from the tangent your mind had taken you on.

“Not really doesn’t mean no! Spill the beans,” Maisie teases, and you realise you’re completely in the shit.

“There’s this one guy I’ve been talking to I guess. He’s not from here, but it could work out.”

You notice the shift in Johnny straight away, you feel the absence of his touch immediately as he drops your hand. Price raises his eyebrow, of course you’ll be grilled when you get home about this mystery man.

“Didn’t know you were seeing anyone,” Johnny mutters, but it’s loud enough for everyone to hear.

You’re quick to use the slight pause to change the subject, bringing up the first time the two of you met, much to his sisters’ glee and his despair. Even John chortles, thinking back to Soap sputtering over the huge mistake the man made upon your first introduction.

“Seriously Johnny?!” squawks Amelia through her tears.

“They even look alike, I figured out they were related as soon as they were stood next to each other, and this is the first time we’ve met!” is the follow up, through more laughter.

Dinner finishes quickly after that, the two men splitting the bill, not allowing any of their companions to even see it.

John bids his goodbye’s to Amelia and Maisie, before telling Soap he’ll see him on base tomorrow, slightly later than usual. Before you can make your way home the two women are pulling you into hugs, before letting you know they’ve set up a group chat for the three of you.

Johnny’s goodbye is short and sharp, gone is the playful man you spent most of the evening with.

It’s only when you’re lying in bed later, rehashing what went wrong that you realise Johnny thinks you were talking about someone else.

I was talking about you, you dolt x

Your phone starts buzzing, and you don’t even need to look to know who’s calling.

“Had me sweating for a minute there, Sweets. Thought I was going to have some random bloke coming for my head.”

You can hear the relief in his voice as he lays the charm on real thick. Between his accent and the things he mumbles down the phone you think your heart might explode.

The crush you have on this man is debilitating, if you can even call it a crush that is. It’s been on and off about two months of talking to each other, and you know that you’re beginning to get in deep with him.

“Sweets, you there?” his voice echos softly through the speaker on your phone, tentative in case you’ve accidentally fallen asleep on the phone. It wouldn’t be the first time.

“Yeah, I’m here. Just thinking, sorry.”

“Don’t be sorry, what you thinking?2

“Just about us, you…” your voice trails off, you’re tired now, inhibitions slipping a little as your head feels slightly heavier on the pillow.

“Yeah? Anything good?” you can hear the grin he has plastered on his face as he talks.

“It’s all good. I like you, y’know.”

That’s the first time you’ve admitted your feelings for him. You know he knows, and he’s made it very clear he has feelings for you, but hearing you say it has him bouncing off the walls with glee. It’s the best medicine to fix the conflicting thoughts he’d had about the whole thing once you admitted you were seeing someone.

“I do, I like you too. Like really like you.”

The conversation turns soft once again, and before he knows it he’s whispering goodnight to you, as your gentle snores crackle through the receiver, half muffled by the duvet you cocooned yourself in.

Taglist: (please let me know if you’d like to be added, all requests from my taglist will get priority)

@cassiecasluciluce @misshoneypaper @unknownduck0 @iwannabealocalcryptid @darkangel4121 @clear-your-mind-and-dream @mothiing @pepsicolacoochie @samanthamarkle92

[thefallennightmare]

Truth-one shot

Pairings: Bucky Barnes x Reader

Words: 8800

Warnings: heavy duty angst, swearing, fluff, mention of death and alcoholism, implied smut.

Summary: Years after losing her husband, Reader needed a change and decided to move to a new apartment in a new city, hoping for a fresh start. She always had questions about what happened to her husband but never expected her neighbor to be the one that had all the answers she had been looking for.

Authors Note: Holy shit, this is a long one. Took me two days to write with my busy schedule. So, apologies for any small mistakes, I didn't proofread. 32 pages, can ya blame me? Hope Ya'll like it!

I walked up the last few steps towards my apartment, the long and emotional day finally catching up to me. The three-hour drive turned into a six hour and with half of my day gone, the thought of climbing into bed brought a soft smile to my lips. The amount of people I had to plaster a fake smile for mentally drained me, so I was thankful I didn’t have to see anyone for the next 12 hours until someone undoubtedly face-timed me to check in. 

Grief wasn’t something I expected to deal with overnight and the support was nice when needed. But it had been years since that night, I was at the point in my life where I was ready to finally move on and accept it, even if his family continued to check in every day. 

Whatever joy I felt about being able to quickly slip inside and into my bed left my body when I noticed two guys hanging around the apartment door across from mine, chatting amongst themselves. Internally I groaned when I knew that I wasn’t going to go unnoticed by them. Almost every day one of them would ask for my number or ask to come inside. It never got physical and they accepted no the first time. 

It still bothered me that they tried every day. 

“Hey baby, why the long face?” One of the guys asked. 

Not wanting to deal with any of them today, I ignored them and reached my door in a quick flash, ready to get this interaction over with. However the other guy had stepped in front of me to block me from entering my apartment. 

Unbeknownst to them, I had gripped my car key in between my fingers; to be safe. 

“Please move. I’m not in the mood tonight.” I threatened. 

He licked his lips. “Come on. One night with us will change your mood. I guarantee it.” 

I sliced my eyes into him. “Move. Now.” 

He didn’t budge and the other guy was now lurking behind me. My heart hammered in my chest, not knowing what was to come. The key could only do so much damage with the two of them. 

“Everything alright?” 

I looked over my shoulder and let out a long breath of relief when I saw my next door neighbor leaning against his doorway, concern etched on his face.

“Doesn’t concern you.” The guy behind me said while not taking his eyes off of the back of my head. 

“I think it does,” my neighbor said. 

The guy that was blocking my path inside didn't bother to see who my neighbor was before he spoke up. 

“Man, get back inside. She's fine!”

“She doesn’t look fine.” 

The same guy grabbed my hand, ignoring my neighbor, and led me towards my door giving an extra hard push. 

“Tell him babe, you’re with us.” 

I haven't officially met my neighbor, only seeing him in passing, so I hoped he understood the look of despair I gazed his way. If that didn’t catch on, the way I mouthed ‘help’ should have. 

Before I could register what had happened, my neighbor had the guy behind me on the floor clutching his stomach and the guy in front of me pinned up on the wall, gloved fingers around his throat. By the look of fear in their eyes, it was clear that they finally realized who saved me. 

“I don’t want to see you lurking around here or bothering her again, understand?” 

They guys were out of sight in seconds, not wanting to get on the wrong side of my neighbor again. 

“You alright?” He asked while giving me a quick once over with his intense eyes. 

I nodded, my heart calming down. “Yeah, thank you for that. They always hang around but never got that close before.” 

My neighbor nodded. “Well, I’m glad you’re okay.” 

He went to walk back into his apartment but my quiet voice stopped him. 

“Thank you again, Mr. Barnes.” 

He turned to face me once again. “You can call me Bucky. I’m around anytime if you need something.” 

We shared a small smile before slipping into our own apartments. 

The quiet solace of my apartment was everything I needed after the absolute hell of a morning I had. I never meant to raise my voice at her, she was hurting too, but she was asking questions that I didn’t even know the answer to. 

“I never said I don’t miss him, Barb. It’s just been so long that I can’t keep dwelling on the what if’s.” 

“How can you say that? Don’t you want to know what happened to him?” 

“Of course I do! But there’s no leads; no answers. I don’t know what else you want from me.” 

“He’s my son, Y/N. I will find out what happened to him whether you want me to or not!”

“He was my husband, Barb! I don’t have any fucking answers on how he died because I don’t know how he died! The cops don’t even know. So stop thinking I’m hiding something from you.” 

My mother in law meant well but she was tired of not having answers to what happened; we all were. But none of us were accusing each other of hiding something. 

I let out a deep, aggravated sigh, while I pinched my eyes shut, hoping it would help the headache that was slamming behind my eyes. My body molded into the couch, hoping that it would ease away the worries I felt. The darkness I saw behind my eyes began to fill with memories that night, hours before he died, and my veins filled with regret knowing that I was the reason he was dead. I kicked him out that night, told him not to come back unless he kicked his habit. 

Alcohol consumed his life and it wasn’t something I could deal with anymore. 

The constant fights because of him staying out all night at the bars or showing up to important things drunk as hell. 

Maybe if I let him stay, he would still be alive. 

I quickly shook those thoughts out of my mind, knowing that even if I did keep him home that night, one way or another he would have still wrapped his car around a tree. 

The only answers the cops could give me was that they believed he was driving drunk. I believed them because I knew the kind of man he was; as much as he loved me, he loved the booze a bit more. 

His mother never wanted to believe that her “precious son” could have those demons so when I told her what happened, she didn’t believe me. 

My phone’s alarm went off with the message laundry and I remembered that I had been working on my laundry when Barb called. 

Making sure my phone and keys were in my pocket, I let my door close behind me as I walked down the long hallway and hung a left, the communal laundry room coming in sight. 

I always chose to do my laundry in the middle of the night because everyone else in the building was asleep so I didn’t have to worry about someone hogging all of the machines. 

So to say I was surprised when I saw someone else in the laundry room was an understatement; mostly because Bucky had his back to me, folding away. I only knew it was him because of the metal fingers that worked to fold a shirt of his. 

“Here I thought I was the only one who did laundry at 3 am,” I smirked while walking past him. 

Bucky gave me his own. “I usually don’t but couldn’t sleep so I figured I might as well get a couple loads done.” 

Realizing that my clothes weren’t quite dry yet, I set them for another cycle before giving Bucky my attention once again. 

“Did I have my t.v to loud? I only moved in six months ago and sometimes forget that these walls are paper thin.” 

He quickly shook his head when he noticed the sorrowful frown pulling my lips. 

“Not at all. Just couldn’t sleep,” Bucky shrugged. 

 There were rumors around the complex of him, some that I opted to pay no mind too but there was one that I did believe; his nightmares. 

The walls were incredibly thin and you can hear a conversation from the person on the other side of the wall. Which meant I had heard Bucky have nightmares once or twice. Given who he was and what he used to do, I couldn’t blame him for having them. 

For a brief moment, our eyes locked and the fire I felt burning in the pits of my stomach with how intense his gaze made me bite the inside of my cheek. I had only seen him in quick passes so never got the chance to actually look at him. His blue eyes were dark, filled with exhaustion, but somehow still shone bright. His stubble that covered the lower half of his face was filled with a few gray hairs, and the long hair that he had when I saw him a few nights ago was gone. 

My mouth fell open. “How did I just notice you cut your hair?” 

Bucky smiled. “Needed something different.” 

“Well you look good. I mean it looks good. Not that you don’t look good, you do but your hair looks good too.”

Words spewed out like vomit before I had the chance to stop it. I felt my cheeks burning in embarrassment. It had been so long since I attempted to flirt with someone and the first chance I had, I blew it. 

“I’m just going to glue my lips shut now before I embarrass myself even more.” 

Bucky chuckled while lifting his basket with ease, metal arm twinkling in the overhead light. Some of the other rumors that went around the complex was that people were afraid of him because of his arm. But I always found myself intrigued with it. 

Black with gold lines twisting and turning all around his arm. I wanted to trace it with the tips of my fingers. 

“If you glued them shut then we wouldn’t be able to keep talking,” Bucky said. 

“I’m sure there are other people around here that will be glad to talk to you without embarrassing themselves.” 

He shrugged. “I don’t like talking to them as much.” 

My brow peaked at his comment. “Are you saying you like talking to me?” 

He gave me a wink before walking out of the room while calling over his shoulder. 

“You look good too by the way.” 

The previous heat I felt down below intensified and had to swallow the moan that came crawling out of my throat. This was the second interaction we shared that lasted more than a few seconds and slowly he began taking over my mind where I found myself thinking of what he was doing and how badly I wanted to talk to him or see him. 

“God, I need a bath and a large milkshake,” I groaned to myself as I reached the last step of the floor to my apartment. 

My eight hour shift that started at six this morning became a fifteen hour shift and now that it was reaching close to nine in the evening, I never craved sleep more than I did right now. 

As my door came into view, I quickly noticed that Bucky’s door was open and he was hanging around it, a few people with him. They were chatting amongst themselves and clearly having a good time so I decided not to impose. My head was down as I searched my purse for my keys, trying to go unnoticed. 

“Long day?” 

Bucky stepped away from his group of friends and leaned against my door frame. 

I nodded. “My boss asked me to stay a few extra hours; I couldn't say no.” 

“So I’d assume you’re too tired for a drink?” Bucky asked while stuffing his hands into his pockets. 

“Yeah, sorry. I’ve got the late shift tomorrow so I want to take advantage of the extra sleep.” I apologized. 

He waved me off, saying he understood. 

“Plus, I wouldn’t want to impose on your friends.” 

“You wouldn’t,” Bucky shook his head. “But if you change your mind, the offer still stands. 

I nodded a quick thanks before I watched him walk back into his apartment, the skinny brunette girl attached to his arm. A twinge of jealousy stirred in my stomach and I let out a gruff groan, knowing that it was ridiculous of me to feel jealous. 

The rest of the night passed with nothing exciting, that was until I had decided to finally go to sleep, only to be kept awake by nightmares of that night. Flashing red and blue lights, his car wrapped around the tree, his body hanging out of the driver's side door with blood pooling from his head, and the sirens being drowned out by my screams. 

I awoke with a scream, it echoed throughout my apartment, and my chest rose and fell with each heavy breath. It had been so long since I had dreamed of that night but it was still as raw as that night. 

Once I had calmed down, I finally could hear what was coming from the wall behind me. The headboard banging against the wall in the apartment next door only getting drowned out by the moaning of what could only be described as ecstasy. 

But as soon as I heard it, it ceased being replaced by hushed voices. 

“Did you hear that?” 

“Why’d you stop? I was so close.” 

“I think the scream came from Y/N’s place.” 

“Bucky, come on. I’m only in town for tonight. Don’t waste it on someone else. I’m sure that person is fine.”

Damn these thin walls. 

With a quick jump from my bed, I tossed on a sweater and sweatpants before climbing onto my balcony through my large bedroom window, allowing the fall night air to calm my racing thoughts. I don't know who I thought was on the other side of the wall, clearly that was Bucky’s room and there was a brunette clinging to him when they walked back into his apartment. 

It still stung to see someone else with him. 

Why does it matter to you? You’re not even on his radar. 

I shook the thought from my mind and looked up into the sky, hoping to see some stars. Why I ever moved to New York, I never understood. With the noise and lights, trying to look up to the night sky for some peace was inevitable. 

Tears fell and I ghastly wiped them away as I thought back to my nightmare, visions of him lying there in death, all alone. Soft sobs fell from my lips and shoulders shook with despair and hatred that I allowed him to leave that night. 

“Everything alright?” 

I slightly jumped at the voice and saw Bucky leaning against the shared railings of our balcony, a beer bottle loosely hanging between his fingers. 

“Yeah,” I nodded while avoiding his gaze. 

Thankfully it was dark out here so he wasn’t able to see my tear stained cheek. Between the nightmares and hearing Bucky having sex with someone else, I was a wreck. 

I wasn’t sure why the thought or image of him with someone else bothered me so much. This feeling was unknown, something I hadn’t felt in so long; since before my husband. Maybe that’s why I felt like this, guilty for it being because of another guy. 

You fancy him, dumbass. 

Blinking away the thought, I leaned deeper into the chair and closed my eyes, enjoying the breeze. 

“Anything I can help with?” Bucky questioned. 

“I don’t want to keep you from your company.” 

He quickly shook his head. “You’re not.” 

“I’m fine, Bucky. I just couldn’t sleep,” I kept my eyes trained on the chipped away  nail polish on my fingers. 

The curtness in my voice didn’t go unnoticed by him. “I heard a scream-.” 

“Bucky, there you are! What are you doing out here, it’s freezing!” 

Both of our eyes landed on the woman that had slinked her way next to Bucky, a hand on his back and a soft kiss to his cheek. 

My heart fell deep into my stomach and I let out a shaky breath to try and compose myself. I didn’t want to cry again, not in front of them. 

“I’ll be there in a minute. I’m talking with Y/N,” Bucky nodded towards me. 

I shook my head while standing to my feet. “I was actually about to head to bed. See you around.” 

“Perfect, let's go Bucky.” 

The brunette linked fingers with him, purposely avoiding his metal hand, and tried to drag him inside. 

“Are you sure you’re alright?” Bucky wondered. 

I nodded, trying to hold the tears back but Bucky could see right through my facade and told the brunette he would meet her inside. Reluctantly she nodded and soon it was the two of us again. 

“She seems nice,” I motioned towards where she was previously standing. “Sounds like you two had a good night.” 

Bucky’s face fell when he realized what I was talking about. “You heard?” 

“Thin walls.” 

He cursed under his breath. “I’m sorry, we’re usually more quiet.” 

“Oh, so this isn’t a one time thing?” I wondered. 

“Does it matter?” He asked. 

But then the confusion was replaced with humor, a sly smirk pulling at his lips. His elbows leaned against the railing, his face coming closer to me. We were so close now I was afraid he could tell that I had been crying so I kept my gaze trained hard to the floor beneath my feet. 

A cool metal finger lifted my chin and I sucked in a breath when I drank in his gaze, so powerful and moving. 

“Are you jealous?” 

My lips parted, unsure of how to answer mostly because I didn’t even know if that’s what I was feeling. But I did recognize one feeling and was coursing through me; comfort. 

It was a simple action, his finger lifting my chin, but that had been the first contact I’ve felt in so long that it almost over took me, the tears pooling at the corner of my eyes. 

“No,” I finally answered. 

Bucky snorted, not believing me. Whatever witty comment he had was gone when tears fell from my eyes, concern clouding his gaze. 

“Hey, what’s wrong?” His hands now cupped my face. 

I shook my head in his grasp. “I’m fine.” 

“Y/N,” he urged. “You can talk to me.” 

My eyes refused to meet him, knowing that if they locked, I would melt into him and tell him everything. He didn’t need that, though. He could have been dealing still with his own trauma, I wasn’t going to pour mine on top of it. I had been dealing with it on my own for so long, I could continue too.  

I breathed, feeling his pinkies gently trace circles in the back of my head getting tangled in my hair. The slight action caused a quiet moan to fall from my lips. 

Not a sexual moan but a need for more affection. 

Bucky seemed to have understood so with his metal fingers he ran them fully through my hair and begged me with soft whispers to look at him. 

I obliged. 

His blue eyes bore down at me and with his touch, I felt myself crumble into him, my hands slowly grazing up his chest to his shoulders. I was ready to let it all go, let him in. 

Until her voice sounded behind us once again. 

“What the hell?” 

Bucky turned to look at the brunette, ready to explain himself but before he had the chance, I slipped out of grasp with fresh tears falling. 

“I’m sorry,” I whimpered. 

His pleas to come back meant nothing as I slipped back inside, shutting the window behind me. 

The buzzing from my phone on my end table meant nothing as I turned my back to it, adjusting a new position on my bed. With my blankets pulled up to my chin, another broken sob fell as the water from my eyes continued to stain my pillow case. 

I knew who was blowing up my phone, I didn’t need to check. 

Bucky had found my number from the apartment phone book the other day and he had been trying to get into contact with me to see how I was doing. 

It had been almost a week since that night on my balcony and I had done everything I could to avoid him. Not sure why I felt I needed too, he only was trying to help. 

Truth be told, the memories of my husband and his accident had caused me to go into a dark place, not wanting to leave my apartment let alone my bed. Since I moved to New York, I was alone, no one to share in my grief with which is why whenever a wave crashed over me, I fucking drowned in it. 

When the buzzing phone finally ceased, I breathed a sigh of relief and forced my eyes to shut in hopes of letting the dark slumber take it. 

Three persistent knocks to my window caused my eyes to spring open and when I saw Bucky sitting on the other side, I groaned. 

“Leave me alone!” I yelled, fully engulfing myself in my blankets now. 

The sound of the window opening and a large body all but crashing inside made me sit up in bed, brow perked in confusion. Bucky was standing in my bedroom now with a concerned gaze. 

“You know for a former assassin, you’re not that quiet when breaking into someone’s apartment,” I stated. 

He shrugged. “I thought about knocking on your door but figured you wouldn’t answer.” 

I nodded. “You thought right. Feel free to leave that way though.”

My back was turned to him as I laid down in bed again, pulling the blanket to my chin. Bucky didn’t need to say anything, his warm presence was still felt behind me. I let out an annoyed groan before turning to face him again and it was then that I took in appearance for the first time. Gray sweatpants and a tight black shirt that hugged every inch of his chest and torso. His metal arm twinkled under the soft glow from the lamp in the corner of my room. 

Even in somewhat darkness, he looked breathtaking. 

“You’re not going to leave, are you?” I questioned. 

When he shook his head, I reluctantly sat up and motioned for him to sit; he hesitated. 

“If I didn’t trust you, I wouldn’t be inviting you in my bed right now,” I stated. 

Realizing I had a point, he finally relaxed and sat on the edge of my bed. “Did I do something to make you uncomfortable?” 

“You didn’t,” I reassured him with a small smile. “I’ve been dealing with some things lately, that’s all.” 

“Do you want to talk about it?” Bucky suggested. 

I gnawed on my bottom lip, debating whether or not it was a good idea to talk to him about my problems. I didn’t want him to think less of me because of them. 

You know he wouldn’t. 

“I don’t want to keep you,” I began. “Especially if you’ve got company.” 

Bucky immediately shook his head. “That’s over, I promise. You’re the only one that has my attention.” 

My heart soared with his words and the redness that crept from my cheeks to the tips of my ears didn’t go unnoticed by him. I let out a deep breath to gain whatever courage I could and wondered where to start. 

“I, uh, was married.” 

Bucky’s body tensed at my words so I gently laid a hand on his knee. “Was. Not anymore.” 

He relaxed with my touch. 

“My husband, Rick, died about eight years ago. Next month actually,” I admitted. 

His face fell. “I’m sorry.” 

“I’ve done my best to move on, try to create this new life without him. Which is why I moved here. I thought a fresh start would help.” 

“Why did you wait so long to leave?” Bucky asked. 

“My mother in law. We only had each other and I never found the right time to leave. But the grief and questions became too much to bear so I had to stop thinking about how she felt and start taking care of myself.” 

I almost didn't notice Bucky slip his flesh fingers between mine as I continued to tell my story. 

Almost. 

“She was so hell bent on finding the truth on what happened that her accusations pushed me away.” 

“With his death?” Bucky questioned. 

I let out a low sob. “Yeah. He-uh-he was driving drunk one night and crashed his car into a tree.”

My body shook with fresh tears as the memories began replaying like an old movie in the back of my mind, the wounds tearing open once again. 

Bucky had snuck up next to me, wrapping his arms around me to pull me into his chest. I seeped into him, allowing his soft words of comfort to ease my pain. 

“The images of him hanging out of his car haunt me to this day. I can't go to sleep without seeing him, bloody and cold,” I cried into his chest, hands grasping at his shirt. 

He didn’t say anything, he didn't have too. If anyone understood how I felt, it was Bucky. His large hand rubbed circles on my back while I continued to sob, finally letting go for the first time in so long. I didn’t realize how bad I needed someone to just listen to my problems and comfort me, not criticize how I feel or accuse me of keeping secrets about Rick’s death. 

“His mother blames me,” I muttered into Bucky’s chest. 

“Why?” 

I pulled slightly away from him and looked up into his eyes; they were clouded in sorrow. He cupped my cheek and with his metal thumb wiped the tears away, the coolness of it easing the redness caused by my cries. 

“I couldn’t deal with his drinking any longer. It was ruining our marriage so I told him that he  needed to leave and only come back when he was sober. Rick’s mom didn’t want to believe that he had those demons but he did. I held onto him for so long that I couldn’t take care of him any longer.” 

“He got so good at hiding when he was drunk that I had no idea he was that night. Maybe if I had known, he would still be-.” 

“Hey,” Bucky lifted my chin up to meet his gaze. “You cannot blame yourself for his actions, okay? None of what happened is your fault.” 

I wasn’t so sure if he was talking to me or more so himself. It wasn’t a surprise to anyone that knew about The Winter Soldier's past that Bucky had so much trouble not blaming himself for what he did during that time. 

My head pounded from all the crying and I had nothing left in me, emotionally, so all I could do was nod in his grasp. 

“I’m here to help you with whatever you need to get past that guilt, alright?” 

I nodded again. “Thank you, Bucky.” 

He responded by pulling me into his chest once again, allowing me to ease into his comforting touch as he continued to run circles over my back. 

Time had passed, the two of us locked together with my sobs being replaced with constant yawn after yawn. 

Bucky began to pull away. “I’ll let you get some sleep.” 

I squeezed him a bit, not ready to let go. “Few more minutes? I haven't felt this kind of comfort in so long. It’s nice.” 

His lips brushed the top of my head and I melted into him again, my heart beating so hard against my chest I knew not only could he feel it, Bucky could hear it as well. 

“Take all the time you need, doll.” 

My heart fucking soared at the pet name. 

Our laughter bounced off the walls of the complex as Bucky and I both ascended up the staircase towards home. I had been on my way home from work when I bumped into him one block away, with a bouquet of fresh flowers grasped between his metal fingers. 

“You mentioned that you had a rough day at work so I thought these would make it better.” 

His words from when I questioned him about them brought a smile back to my face. 

Ever since that night last month where I told him about Rick, we had grown incredibly close. He was there for me when the nightmares got bad, or I needed someone to talk to; with me also returning the favor. 

Even if he was in therapy to deal with his past, I was still by his side to lend an extra ear and a comforting hold. 

If anyone was to ask what we were, I would tell the truth; friends. 

That love to steal longing glances, the occasional flirty banter, and fingers lingering on one's skin longer than normal. 

“You didn’t have to go out of your way to get me flowers, Buck,” I reiterated my words from earlier. 

He shrugged as we turned the corner of the hallway, our apartments coming into view. 

“Anything to bring a beautiful smile to your face,” he mused while throwing an arm over my shoulder. . 

“Cheeky, aren’t you?” I giggled while patting his chest. 

My feet came to a halt when I saw the lone figure leaning against my door, arms crossed in what appeared to be one thing. 

Anger. 

“Barb, hi. What are you doing here?” I asked, confused. 

She shook her head. “Eight years. Today.” 

My heart dropped. Bucky had been such a good thing in my life lately that I had forgotten Rick’s death anniversary was today. 

“Oh.” I muttered. 

Barb scoffed. “That’s all you have to say? What would Rick have to say about this?”

She motioned towards Bucky who still had his arm around me so he quietly slipped away and tried to leave but I gently grasped his arm to stop him. 

“I can go. I’ll talk to you later,” he suggested. 

While I shook my head, Barb’s demeaning voice spoke again. 

“I think that’s a good idea. She doesn’t need you right now.” 

My eyes snapped over towards her. “Excuse me? What gives you the right to speak to him like that?” 

“Doll, it’s alright.” 

“Doll?!” Barb shrieked. “How long has this been going on? What would Rick think?” 

I shook my head in disbelief. “Nothing because he’s dead Barb. Has been for a long time.” 

“I cannot believe you’ve moved on already. He was your husband for god sakes! He loved you dearly and this is how you repay him? Fucking the first man that touched you.” 

Anger radiated off of me, Bucky noticing the way my breath became erratic so he gently laced our fingers together and nodded towards his door. 

“Come on, let’s get inside.” 

In our many talks I had mentioned a few times about how demeaning and cruel my mother in law could be but I put up with it for years because I was married to her son. The constant belittlement from her had knocked me down to my lowest and now that I was finally starting to feel better about everything thanks to his help, Bucky refused to let me get back to that low. 

I held him back with a shake of my head before giving Barb my attention. “I don’t know why you came here. Like I said on the phone last week, I still don’t have the answers you’re looking for, Barb. Whether you want to believe it or not, your son was an alcoholic and it was his actions that night that killed him. I know it’s not easy to hear but Rick is gone and your quest to find answers to questions that don’t exist isn't going to bring him back.” 

Barb shook her head, looking at me bewildered. “No. There’s a witness that was there that night. They said they saw someone in the road before RIck crashed. He swerved so he wouldn’t hit them. Not the lies you’ve been saying!” 

“I’m not lying about anything!” I snapped, mouth ready to spew hateful things towards her. 

Bucky squeezed my hand as if he could read my mind, knowing what I was about to say. 

I took a deep breath to calm myself, knowing that no matter what I said to her Barb would never change her mind. She could never see her son in such a negative light. 

“I don’t know what else to tell you, Barb. But I know that I can’t keep doing this with you; Rick wouldn’t want this. As much as we loved each other, he wanted me to move on. We talked about it all the time that if something happened to one of us that the other wouldn’t dwell on the heartbreak. He had demons, he tried to drown them with alcohol but they knew how to swim.” 

Tears pricked my eyes. “Rick would want me to be happy, to find love with someone else. He would want the same for you.” 

Without another word, I let Bucky lead me inside of his apartment, ready to finally leave Barb in my past. 

“Are you alright?” Bucky questioned once inside. 

I sat on his couch with a soft groan and nodded. “Yeah, it needed to be said. I hate that it took so long though.”

Bucky trekked around his apartment placing the flowers in a vase then grabbing a beer for him and a glass of water for me. I smiled a thanks as he sat next to me, his hand placed on my knee.

“I’m sorry for what she said to you,” I frowned. 

He shrugged. “It's nothing you need to apologize for, doll.” 

With his flesh hand on my knee and the metal one lounged on the top of the couch, his fingers inches from my face, I began tracing the gold lines, mesmerized by the design. Before when I would look or touch it, Bucky would flinch because he was afraid of how I would react to it. 

“I don’t understand how you’re not afraid of it,” Bucky wondered. 

“The way I see it,” I began while linking our fingers together, “This arm was your fresh start. Your old one did all of those horrible things and this one has done so much good, you can’t let the weight of the old one hold you back.” 

A smile pulled wide on his face. “Who needs therapy when that advice is free.” 

I giggled with a wink. “Plus, I come with some extra perks.” 

Bucky smiled smugly with his eyes turning dark. “Care to explain what those perks are?

My lips went dry and I rolled my tongue over them, hoping it would help. The intense gaze I felt from Bucky was enough to lock me into place on his couch with my hands now in my lap clasped together in hopes they stopped shaking with nerves. 

They didn't. 

There was something between us, that wasn’t a question. But what exactly, I wasn’t too sure. We would flirt back and forth and have some small touches here and there but that’s all it was. Neither of us were brave enough to take the next step in this relationship. 

I gnawed on my bottom lip while staring in Bucky’s eyes and I noticed the way his breath caught in his throat, unable to move as I slowly, oh so agonizingly slow, closed the distance between us. Meters from his lips, I hesitated though, my warm breath fanning over his plump lips. This close I could see how pink and full they were, practically begging to be kissed; ravished.

Lips parted and ghosting over each other, I could feel the softness against mine and when I glanced up into his gaze I noticed Bucky’s pupils were blown with desire. 

Fuck it. 

I crashed my lips to his in a slow but firm kiss, testing to see if he wanted this as much as I did. Soon we began to meld together, his hands gripping my hips while mine found his broad shoulders, nails digging slightly. He hissed against my lips, the sensation burning low in my core when he repaid the favor by digging his own nails into the bare skin of my back. 

I nibbled on his bottom lip, begging to taste him, and his tongue slipped between my lips, exploring every inch of my mouth and I groaned when the heat expanded from my core all the way to my head, making me dizzy. 

Our breathing had become ragged with desire, wanting to feel every single inch of each other's bodies. Bucky’s flesh hand tangled in my hair while his metal hand lifted me with ease into his lap, sprawling his fingers over the plump of my ass. My own hands ran down his chest, down his stomach to ghost over the belt of his pants before they snaked underneath his shirt, the skin of his stomach hot with lust. 

“Bucky,” I moaned into his mouth when I felt his hips press into mine. 

The hardness of his cock pressed against the confines of his jeans and a low groan echoed into his mouth when he pressed up against my heated core again. 

Bucky’s lips left mine to start biting and nipping at the skin of my neck while I rutted slowly but firm into him. My hands gripped and pulled at his shirt, yanking it off of his head in a snap. I felt him tense under me as my eyes glazed over where the skin and metal of his arm met, the scars still looked fresh to this day. 

I left soft, pepper-like kisses over each scar, letting him know that it didn't bother me. 

“Bucky,” I breathed his name once again. “I need you.” 

He spewed a few curses into the crook of my neck before finally pulling away, locking our lust blown pupils together. “Are you sure about this?” 

I traced a finger down his cheek and scratched at the stubble on his face. “I’ve never been more sure about anything.” 

That was all he needed before tossing me over his shoulder and carrying me to his bedroom. 

The coolness from his metal fingers felt almost orgasmic on hot skin as we laid next to each other in bed, in a post-climax haze. Bucky’s fingers traced my spine from the top to bottom, over and over again, and he would leave light feathery kisses where his fingers missed. 

It had been a couple weeks since our first kiss and we had been spending most of our time in his apartment since he had the bigger bed but tonight he surprised me by sneaking into my window while I was asleep, wrapping me in a warm embrace. 

“For an ex assassin, you’re still not that quiet,” I muttered into his warm chest. 

“I missed you,” he breathed into my hairline. 

We then proceeded to spend the next hour tangled in between one another. 

Our relationship had blossomed in those few days even if we had decided to take things slow, not needing to rush or put a label on it quite yet. Even though we both knew how we felt about one another. 

His soft lips left the skin of my back and found its new mark on my neck, Bucky continuing the mark he began earlier. 

“Bucky, I’m so tired,” I whined, playfully smacking him away. 

With a fake groan of annoyance, he pulled away not before leaving a kiss on my forehead. 

“I’m going to grab a glass of water then I’ll come back to bed.” 

The dark slumber was within my grasp, fingers dancing towards it, so all I could do was nod in response. The bed shifted with the sudden change in weight and I wrapped the blanket around me, allowing the darkness to fully engulf me but only to be yanked from it a short time later by the sound of glass breaking. 

“Babe, you alright?” 

Silence. 

“Bucky?” 

More silence. 

Pulling my brows together with confusion, I quickly dressed myself in Bucky’s shirt that he had worn over here and walked into the main living space of my apartment expecting to see Bucky cleaning up whatever broke. 

However, I only saw the broken glass from a cup and a picture face down on the ground next to my couch. 

“What the-?” I muttered while picking it up. 

My heart sank when I saw what picture it was; Rick and I on our wedding day. 

I mentally smacked myself because I thought I had taken down whatever was left of Rick in my apartment when Bucky and I started seeing each other. It wasn’t fair to him that I still had pictures or mementos of a past love up. 

“Fucking dumbass. No wonder why he left,” I cursed to myself. 

I scurried back into my room and reached for my phone, typing out a message. 

I’m sorry that you saw that picture. I thought I packed everything up. Can you come back so I can make it up to you?

A few minutes went by with no response so I sent another message. 

Or I can come over there if that’s alright. 

A few more minutes went by with no response from Bucky so with an aggravated groan, I tossed my phone onto my bed with myself falling close behind. 

“Way to fucking blow it, Y/N,” I grumbled while running my hands over my face. 

Two days. Two fucking days Bucky had been ignoring my texts, calls, and persistent knocks to his door. I had been a wave of different emotions the last two days; Anger, confusion, and hurt; mostly hurt. 

I never knew that Bucky had an issue about my past marriage since I talked about it openly with him so much and he helped me heal that part of mind and heart, moving on completely from it; with him. 

The time we spent together was some of the best parts of my life and I would be a fool to say that it meant nothing to me. Bucky had become an important person in my life and the mere thought of losing him forever weighed heavy on my heart. 

A heart that took so long to mend from past heartbreak and loss. A heart that took forever to find that perfect someone to pick up the pieces, make it feel whole; loved. 

I sat up in bed with a start, the blankets falling from my body, when I was slammed with the sudden realization; it hit me so hard I almost fell right back into my bed. 

I was in love with Bucky. 

And I wasn’t going to let him get away. 

Throwing whatever clothes on I could find, I was standing in front of Bucky’s door in less than a minute, knuckles rapidly knocking with no end in sight. 

“Bucky, can you please open the door?” I called through the thick piece of wood. “I really need to talk to you.” 

More knocking followed by more begging. 

“I’m not going anywhere until you let me inside,” I informed him with crossed arms and all of my weight perched on my left foot. 

“Do I have to pull some ex assassin bullshit and sneak in through your window?” 

The door in front of me opened revealing a very tired looking Bucky and I cringed when I remembered that it was almost four a.m. 

“I’m sorry, I didn’t even realize what time it was.” I apologized. 

Bucky simply nodded. “It’s alright.” 

He went to shut the door again but I blocked it with an angry hand. “You’re not going to shut me out again. For two fucking days you’ve been ignoring me with no explanation.” 

“Y/N, please-.” 

“No!” I shot. “I don’t know what the hell is going on with you but I don’t deserve to be shut out like this especially after everything we’ve gone through and the things I’ve told you.”

Bucky ran a hand over the subtle on his cheek before nodding, allowing the door to open a bit more with me slipping inside before he could change his mind. I was in such a rush to tell him how I felt that I hadn’t noticed his sleeping attire; a pair of very tight black briefs and his hair was a tousled mess of slumber. 

As breathtaking as he looked, Bucky needed to know how I felt. 

“Did I do something wrong? I know you found that picture of Rick and I.” 

He was quick to dismay my worry. “It wasn’t about the picture.” 

My shoulders raised with confusion. “Then what is bothering you? Is it me, are you over us?” 

“No, doll, trust me.” He hesitated to reach for me. 

“Then tell me why the fuck you’ve been avoiding me?!” I snapped, voice raised in anger. 

“I can’t,” Bucky shook his head, refusing. 

“You’re kidding, right?” I scoffed. 

He was in fact not kidding with the stern face he bore. 

“God, I’m so stupid!” I covered my face with my hands. “I let myself open up to you, let you in my life when I needed someone the most, trusted you with my heart and you ripped it away from me. Right when I started to fall in love with you.” 

Bucky blinked. “Wh-what did you say?” 

Tears pricked my eyes. “I love you, Bucky.” 

“Doll,” he breathed, unsure of what to say next. 

“You don’t feel the same,” I nodded to myself, realizing what his silence meant. “God, I’m such a fucking idiot.” 

Hasty wiping away the tears, I stormed past him only to be stopped by his metal fingers grasping at my wrist, pulling me into his chest. His lips crashed onto mine in a powerful kiss, tongues quickly finding each other in starvation for each others taste. 

We shared many kisses but this one was different; it was the kind that made you fall to your knees with dizziness. 

A good kind of dizzy. 

“I love you too,” he pressed into my lips. 

My heart jumped into my throat as his revelation. “Then why have you been ignoring me?” 

Bucky stepped back slightly and rubbed the back of his neck. “There’s something I need to tell you. I wish I would have told you sooner, it might have saved you.” 

“Save me from what?” 

“Falling in love with me,” he linked our fingers together and set me down on the couch. 

We sat with our knees touching and my heart was hammering so loud in my chest I knew Bucky could hear it. My mind raced a million miles a minute with different thoughts of what he had to tell me. 

“The reason why I left the other night was because when I saw that picture, memories came flooding back, almost over taking me,” Bucky began. 

“Memories? Of what?” I pressed. 

Bucky ran a hand through his hair in clear distress. “I know what happened to Rick.” 

I nodded. “Yeah because I told you. He was driving drunk.” 

He disagreed with me. “He wasn’t drunk that night.” 

I looked at him with confusion. “What are you talking about?” 

With one last deep breath, Bucky fully confessed to his past transgression. 

“Rick wasn’t drunk that night. He was sober and driving to meet with the head of the local Hydra group. I don’t know what Rick told you he did for work but whatever it was was a lie. Rick was hired by SHIELD to take back the super soldier serum I had stolen back in the 90’s.” 

My eyes blinked with disbelief. “You’re lying.” 

“I wish I was, doll. I knew who killed Rick.” 

“Who?” I asked, afraid of knowing the truth. 

Bucky hesitated, breath getting caught in his throat, before he spoke with broken words. “The Winter Soldier. And that was me.” 

His bottom lip trembled the same time his nose scrunched up his disgust for his previous actions. 

My whole world came crashing down from the heavens, falling into large pieces of debris around me. My heart was ringing in my ears that I swore I misheard Bucky. Everything I thought I knew about Rick’s death was a lie? Had Barb been right this whole time?

“No,” I stood to my feet with a start. “You’re fucking with me.” 

Bucky reached for my hand but I snatched it away, a look of hurt flashed across his face. 

“I’m so sorry, sweetheart. I didn’t have a choice,” his broken voice begged me to understand. 

I stopped pacing. “How’d you do it?” 

Bucky refused to answer, only standing to try and get me to stop moving. Anger spilled out of me and I pushed his shoulders to force him back onto the couch. 

“How did you do it?!” I seethed. 

His tongue rolled over his dry lips. “I got in the way of his car so he would have to swerve out of the way. When he crashed, I had to make it look like he was drinking so I injected him with alcohol so it looked like he had been drinking all night.” 

“No,” I sobbed. “This whole time I thought he was at a bar getting fucking wasted and was on his way home when he was actually sober!” 

Bucky flinched but kept his eyes trained at his shaking hands. 

“You fucking left him there to die!” I screamed. “You could have saved him!” 

Bucky was on his feet now, shaking his head rapidly. “It wasn’t me, doll. I swear.” 

“But you still did it!” 

I shoved his chest, hard, and he stumbled back a bit but kept his stance. 

“I wish I never did, Y/N. If I could take back everything I did when I was The Winter Soldier, I would; you know that,” he begged me to listen. 

Sobs plowed through my body causing me to shake and fall to my knees with the truth of what happened that night. The man that I found myself falling in love with had killed my husband. How do you get past that? 

But it wasn’t him. He had no choice.

I screamed at the voice in my mind, telling it to shut up. 

“Doll,” Bucky knelt down to reach for me. 

My fist collided with his cheek knocking him onto his ass and rage took over my vision as I straddled his hips, landing blow after blow to whatever part of flesh I could hit; face, head, neck, chest, stomach, and flesh arm. 

Bucky never stopped me, allowed me to hurt him; try to anyway. The super soldier serum that flowed through his blood every day made it so it felt like he was getting slapped by the wind. 

“Fuck you, Barnes! I hate you!,” I bellowed while going to attack his metal arm. 

In a swift movement, I was now being straddled by Bucky who had both of my hands pinned above my head with his metal fingers gripped tight. Tears fell from his eyes onto the skin of my neck and his chest rose and fell with deep breaths. 

“You don’t mean that.” 

I writhed in his grasp, trying to break free. “I do! You’re a monster, I hate you!” 

When the words left my lips, I immediately regretted them. I knew that he wasn’t a monster, I was only angry at his revelation. I never meant to call him that. Whatever anger I had spilled out of my body through the floor beneath me and I tried to break free once again from Bucky, to reach for him. 

“I didn’t mean it,” I cried. 

He nodded before pulling me into his chest, arms now wrapped around me. He hushed my cries with whispers of sorrow and promised to make it right; make everything right with me and us again. 

“I love you, Y/N. I’m so sorry.” 

My hands clutched at the muscles of his back, my own words being muffled by his chest. 

How could anything be right with us again with me now knowing the truth? Nothing would ever be the same.

[maeral33n]

Was it Worth it? (Velvet and Veneer Angst)

Description: What if Brozone couldn't save Floyd in time? How will the twin handle the consequences of their actions? Is a sibling's bond strong enough to forgive murder? Authors Note: Yeah, I was feeling some stuff today, and writing angst is cheaper than therapy. That being said, forgive me if characters seem a bit ooc and feel free to leave feedback.

They did it.

They are officially the most famous Mount Rageons in the past decade.

Velvet and Veneer's rise to fame skyrocketed over night after their award-winning performance at the Rage Dome. Tickets for their performance sold out almost within the hour they were available, and yet people still demanded to buy tickets even if there were no more seats available.

Their beatiful faces were plastered everywhere. In the malls, on the streets, on billboards, and if that wasn't enough, various programs on television were constantly reminding you that these two were the top dogs of the industry.

From the glittering city to the humble suburbs, to the slums of the undercity, everyone knew their names.

And all it took was one troll.

One dead troll.

Veneer stared at him, Floyd, still in his diamond prison. He lay lifeless and colourless. No, not colourless...translucent.

He's heard of discoloured trolls before, he's aware that troll can lose their colours due to trauma, but...it never occurred to him what would happen when a troll died.

Veneer felt life he was going to vomit.

Velvet was practically bouncing with joy as, yet another news anchor showed clips of their two during their performance last night. Her hands fanned her face as she fought back tears of joy, Veneer was trying to hold back his own, but for completely opposite reasons.

Velvet grabbed her brother by the shoulders, shaking him and pointing towards the screen. "Look Ven, we did it! They love us!"

He didn't look at the TV, his eyes were on Velvet in utter disbelief, at no point after their performance did, she even acknowledge that she was practically carrying the small corpse of a troll. Even now, she's pretending like Floyd never existed.

He shoved his sister away, causing her to stumble a bit. She turned to him, brows furrowed in confusion, "What was that for?"

That disgust that churned in his stomach bubbled into something far more ugly than Veneer could have ever possibly imagined as he practically spat. "You killed him."

"What?"

"You killed Floyd!"

Velvet recoiled slightly at her brothers raised voice. Veneer never raised his voice to her, or to anyone really. She rolled her eye and sighed, "Well, maybe if his brothers actually bothered to rescue him, we would have had to kill him."

Veneer groaned into his hand as he rubbed them down his face, he started pacing around the room, an annoying habit of his when he was getting antsy. "Are you even listening to yourself?" He exclaimed, "You don't even CARE!" Now the tears were falling, and there was nothing he could do about it.

Velvet huffed, "Jesus Ven, stop being such a baby." She grabbed his arm, stopping him from pacing, her grip tight. "Look, how about we go on a bit of a hiatus, hm? Y'know, travel a bit, go to Vacay Island or somewhere and relax. And then when we're done with our hiatus, we can find some more trolls and get back to work-"

Veneer practically ripped his arm away from his sisters grip red crescent mark were left where his fingernails dig into him. "Don't fucking touch me!" He snapped, then his eyes widened when her words sank it, "Wait...did you say we'll find some more?"

She scoffed, "Yeah, duh. You didn't think that we'd stop at the Rage Dome, did you?"

He stumbled over his words, trying to form a single coherent thought but failing. His sister spoke up again, "Last night was just the beginning. We may be famous now, but that won't last for long if go into an early retirement. I want us to go global, and to do that, we're gonna need more songs...more trolls."

Veneer was hyperventilating, his shaking steps brought him to Floyd, his tears hitting the diamond surface of cage. Floyd was a person, and Velvet was treating him as a tool, a sacrificial lamb for the offer of fame and prestige. Floyd was someone to somebody, he had a family who loved him, he had a long life ahead of him. And now all of that was gone because of some sick twisted idea some teenagers had one day.

Veneer began to sob.

"Oh god stop being so dramatic Ven," Velvet groaned.

Veneer turned his body around and approached her, his hands balled into fists, his face contorted with anger and contempt, Velvet took a step back. "You're a murderer," he hissed as he now stood face to face with his sister.

Fury flashed in her eyes as she mirrored his stance. "And you're a murderer AND a coward."

He blinked at her, "What?"

She jabbed her finger into his chest, "Don't play dumb. You point the finger at me and call me the murderer, but you forget that you were the one that helped me capture that troll in the first place."

Another jab into his chest, this time, much harder. "You were the one who used his talent first."

She started raised her voice, and jabbed at his chest on last time, this some so painful and Veneer had to grab her wrist and pull it away from him. "And that you had every chance in the world to expose us."

"...What?"

She sneered at him, "Yeah, you could have ended all of this as soon as it started, you could have gone to the police and told them everything we did, and we would be behind bars by now...but you didn't."

His lips quivered as fresh tears fell down his face.

"So that makes you, a murderer and a coward."

Veneer shoved his sister away from him and stormed into his room, Velvet followed him, her heeled boots clicking against the marbled floor. "Where are you going?!"

He didn't answer his, simply grabbed a bag and started shoving anything he could fit into it. Some clothes, shoes, his phone, his wallet...would this even be enough?

"What are you doing?" Velvet growled as she watched her brother walked around his room.

He still didn't answer her, he was crying so hard he could barely see what he was shoving into his bag.

"I said, what are you doing?!"

"I'm leaving!"

Velvet stood still for a moment at the entrance of his bedroom, for once, she had nothing to say. All she could do was watch her brother pace back and forth, growling in frustration as he struggled to shove in another pair of shoes into his back, giving up in the end.

This wasn't supposed to happen. Not like this.

She felt her face grow hot, her emotions overwhelming her. "You don't mean that."

He turned to her as he shrugged the heavy bag over his shoulder, "Yes I do, Velvet. This has gone too far." He pushed his way passed her and made a beeline to the front door.

"Fine then, leave. You'll be back." She spoke coldly this time; whatever fire had been in her voice before was gone now. And that had always scared Veneer.

His hand was on the doorknob, and he spared a single glance over his shoulder. His sister stood in the middle of the room, her arms crossed, her face neutral. She was his best friend, his confidant, his partner in crime...literally.

The he flicked his gaze over to the diamond bottle, the one that held Floyd's dead body. He squeezed his eyes shut as he felt another sob rack through his body. How did it come to this? They couldn't go to prison; he knew he wouldn't stand a chance...and he didn't want to think of what Velvet would do.

Velvet was right, he was a coward.

He rubbed his eyes and looked at his sister again.

"Don't bother calling me."

SLAM!

Velvet stood in the middle of the room, everything was silent, save for the advertisement on TV for a new car model. Despite the silence, her mind was screaming.

He'll be back...he'll be back.... he'll be back...he always comes back.

They've had arguments before, and they've always made amends. Well...she gives him the silent treatment, and he eventually apologies to her. They'll get through this.

She stepped towards the table where the diamond perfume bottle sat atop of. The translucent body of the troll...of Floyd...lay still.

"He'll be back."

(2 Weeks Later)

She had called him over thirty-six times, all of them went to the same prerecorded message of Veneer's voice that he made years ago.

"Hello, you've reached the voice mail of Veneer. If you're getting this message, it's probably because I'm dead or suuuppperrr busy. Anyway, leave a message after the beep....BEEEEEEP!"

Velvet hasn't had a good night sleep since her brother left, and not once did she sleep in her own bed. She'd spent most of her days moping around the living room, going back and forth between channels on TV that might have anything on Veneer's whereabouts to her social media.

She had been absolutely bombarded with fans praising her for her performance and asking if she plans to make more music. She had even received calls and messages from popular news outlets and interviewers to be featured on their shows.

She had declined them all.

She couldn't do it without her brother.

She let out a quiet sob as she sank to the floor in front of her couch.

"....Come back...."

[and-justice-for-zoisite]

𝕰𝖓𝖙𝖆𝖓𝖌𝖑𝖊𝖉 𝖎𝖓 𝕯𝖆𝖗𝖐𝖓𝖊𝖘𝖘 (Kung Lao x Pregnant! Reader)

Official Masterlist

Summary: a curse threatens to shatter the happiness of Kung Lao and the expectant reader. As the curse takes hold, the reader descends into madness and paranoia, convinced that their unborn child is a demonic presence. Desperate to save themselves and their loved ones, Reader attempts to take drastic measures, leading to their confinement and protection. With time running out and hope fading, Kung Lao and his allies embark on a perilous journey to break the curse and restore Reader's sanity.

Word Count: 4.5K words

Warning/s: mega angst, self harm with the intent of killing your baby in the womb. PLEASE READ WITH CAUTION!!

This was written as a request for @eemr1000 thank you for your request and I hope you like it!!

-

8 months in.

The sun's gentle rays filtered through the billowing curtains, casting a soft glow upon the serene bedroom of an expectant couple, Kung Lao and his pregnant wife, who would usually be glowing with her pregnancy. Their shared sanctuary, once filled with laughter and anticipation, now exuded an undercurrent of unease.

Eight months had passed since (Y/n)'s pregnancy began, and the world outside seemed to hold its breath in anticipation of new life. Lao, ever watchful and supportive, revelled in the joy that emanated from his beloved. Their love had blossomed amidst the chaos of battle, forging a bond that could weather any storm.

But as the months wore on, a subtle shift began to take hold. It started with fleeting moments of unease, like a ripple on the surface of a calm pond. (Y/n), once vibrant and radiant, seemed to carry a weight upon her shoulders—an invisible burden that cast a shadow over their once harmonious existence.

Lao noticed the subtle changes in his wife—the way her laughter became more forced, her smiles tinged with a hint of melancholy. Concern etched lines upon his face, his heart heavy with worry. He longed to understand the source of her inner turmoil, to bring back the light that had dimmed within her eyes.

He had just been in their kitchen, preparing the woman a hearty breakfast which usually she would eat with great haste and gluttony - a trait which he loved about her. She was definitely a hungry pregnant, and even when she had put on some weight due to the pregnancy, he still adored the way she'd happily chow down on any dish he prepared for her.

This time though, it was different.

As he returned to their bedroom, a plate of toast, scrambled eggs, and bacon in hands, he observed his wife, lying on her back, drawing circles on her round belly while she stared blankly up at the ceiling.

"I made you breakfast, my love," Lao announced, his voice gentle as he approached her. "...I'm not hungry..." she croaked out, her eyes unmoving as the remained glued to the ceiling.

Lao's brow furrowed with concern, his heart sinking at the emptiness in her voice. He set the tray aside and sat down on the edge of the bed, reaching out to gently caress her cheek.

"That's not like you," he murmured, his voice laced with worry. "is something troubling you, (Y/n)?"

Her eyes flickered, momentarily meeting his gaze before drifting away once more.

"There's...something...wrong," she whispered, her voice barely audible. "I can't shake this feeling, Lao. It's like a dark cloud following me wherever I go."

Lao's heart clenched, a harsh sense of fear swelling within him. He had always been her rock, the one who stood by her side through every trial they had faced. He couldn't bear to see her suffer, especially when he couldn't pinpoint the cause.

"Tell me more, my dear," he pried, clasping her hands with his and rubbing her knuckles with his thumbs.

Tears welled up in her eyes, reflecting the torment that churned within her.

"I...I fear for our child, Lao," she confessed, her voice quivering. "These thoughts...they whisper to me, saying that our baby is not what it seems. That it's something...dark...sinister."

Lao's heart shattered into a thousand pieces, the weight of her words crushing him. He couldn't bear to witness her torment, nor the doubts that gnawed at her soul. But he knew that he had to be her anchor, her unwavering support, even in the face of the unknown.

"(Y/n), you..." he began, trailing off, not entirely sure to say as he shook his head, smiling and trying to lighten the mood, "you're going to be okay. You're...you're probably just anxious and overwhelmed with everything that comes with pregnancy. It's natural to have some fears and doubts, but we'll face them together, my love."

She looked at him, her eyes filled with a mixture of longing and desperation. She wanted to believe what he was saying, to simply brush off these horrid feelings and continue her pregnancy as it was, carrying their child to term. But the darkness that consumed her thoughts refused to release its grip. It clawed at her sanity, infecting her mind with doubts and paranoia that threatened to unravel everything they held dear. Her longing for peace warred with her fear, creating an agonizing turmoil within her.

She didn't say anything, though, she simply looked at her lover, giving him a single nod.

He leaned over her, placing a gentle kiss to her temple before he left the room, his intention with going out into the courtyard and practicing his training.

As he prepared for his training, Lao closed his eyes, taking a deep breath to centre his thoughts.

-

As the days passed, since (Y/n) had initially admitted that she felt something off about that their child, her state seemed to worsen. She continued to refuse food, and would not sleep either. Her days would be spent staring into the void blankly, as she tapped her belly and muttered unintelligible words to herself.

Growing anxious as their baby's due date became closer, Lao called upon the thunder god, Raiden, and his friend Liu Kang, for assistance, hoping to resolve whatever was happening with his poor wife.

"Thank you for coming, Lord Raiden," Lao thanked the deity, as they entered his home. "I fear that something is deeply troubling my wife. She's been consumed by this darkness, and it's taking a toll on her physical and mental well-being."

Lord Raiden's eyes, filled with an otherworldly wisdom, scanned the surroundings. He could sense the turmoil that enveloped the place, the lingering aura of despair and fear.

"I sensed a disturbance, a darkness that clouds this place," Lord Raiden remarked, his voice resonating with an ethereal power. "But fear not, Kung Lao, we shall do everything within our power to uncover the truth and bring light to this situation."

Liu Kang stepped forward, placing a reassuring hand on Lao's shoulder.

"We're here for you, my friend," he said with a determined tone.

Lao gave him a grateful nod, smiling briefly at his best friend as they continued into his home.

Lao led Lord Raiden and Liu Kang through the corridors towards (Y/n)'s chamber. The air grew heavy with tension, a palpable sense of unease filling the space. Lao's steps quickened, his heart pounding in his chest, eager to find answers and provide solace for his suffering wife.

As they entered her bedroom, a horrifying sight became evident.

(Y/n) had a knife held above her. And the target?

The womb which carried their child.

Before any of them could react, she had brought the knife down in one swift movement, driving it straight into her stomach. As she did, a cry of pain echoed throughout the bedroom, and Lao and Liu were quick to rush to her sides, restraining her so she could do no more harm to herself.

One of Lao's hands cradled the knife which was stuck in her, afraid to pull it out as to not let her lose too much blood.

She was squirming, begging to be let go, begging to carve this cursed child from her body.

The scene was a devastating tableau of despair, and Lao's heart shattered into a thousand pieces as he witnessed his wife's anguish and desperation. He knew that time was of the essence, and they had to act quickly to save both (Y/n) and their unborn child.

His eyes teared up as he looked toward Raiden.

"Lord Raiden, please! She needs help!" He begged, his voice trembling as the tears spilled from his eyes, having to shout over (Y/n)'s screaming and crying.

"Be strong, Kung Lao," Lord Raiden said, his voice firm yet comforting. "We will do everything in our power to help her."

Raiden, his demeanour calm, approached the situation, conjuring a surge of energy within his hand as he used the other to carefully draw the knife out of the woman. As he did this, he sealed the wound to the best of his abilities, enough to keep the bleeding at bay.

Tears streamed down (Y/n)'s face, her breathing laboured and weak. She had began to calm down, drowsy from the blood she had lost which had pooled on the ground below her.

As the immediate danger had passed, Liu Kang quickly fetched some clean towels to help staunch the bleeding, while Lao maintained his gentle hold on (Y/n), careful not to exert any pressure on her injured abdomen.

He gently repositioned his wife, so that he could cradle her body like she were a child. He pressed his forehead to hers, unable to stop the choked sobs which passed his lips.

"The baby is unharmed," Lord Raiden confided, sending a wave of relief over Lao. "though, I do sense something sinister within her. A curse."

"Who would've placed a curse on her?" Lao's voice trembled with a mix of confusion and anger.

Raiden approached the woman once again, kneeling down in front of her as he placed a hand on her stomach, gently as to not cause any further harm. He closed his eyes, allowing himself to concentrate on the sinister force that had infected the woman and her baby.

And suddenly, he realised the familiarity of the magic.

"...Shang Tsung." he muttered, opening his eyes again as he drew his hand away.

Kung Lao's eyes widened at the revelation.

"Why would Shang Tsung curse (Y/n) and our child?" Lao asked, his voice filled with a deep-rooted fury. "What does he gain from inflicting such pain upon us?" "I have no clear answer for you, Kung Lao," Raiden admitted regretfully, his tone tinged with frustration. "It is possible that he seeks to disrupt your life and sow chaos, relishing in the pain and suffering he inflicts upon others."

Upon this news, Liu Kang returned to the bedroom, fresh towels in hand as he came to (Y/n)'s side again.

He and Lao helped (Y/n) onto her bed, the two men removing her bloodstained clothes, mindful of her fragile state. Their movements were slow and deliberate, ensuring they didn't cause her any additional discomfort or pain. Lao didn't mind allowing his best friend and the thunder god to see her in such a vulnerable state, considering they were there to help her and two of his closest friends.

Raiden had assisted by fetching a basin of warm water, bringing it back so that they could proceed with her cleaning.

With gentle strokes, Liu began to cleanse the wound on (Y/n)'s abdomen, carefully removing any traces of blood. His touch was tender, his focus unwavering as he tended to her injuries with the utmost care. Lao stood by her side, holding her hand tightly, offering silent reassurance and love as he observed the process.

Though her eyes remained closed, the tension in her features seemed to ease slightly, as if the physical care provided by her husband and friend offered a brief respite from the torment she had endured.

The room remained hushed, filled only with the sound of gentle movements and the soft splashes of water as Liu Kang worked. As he did, Lao decided to gather some fresh clothes for his wife, his trust in his friend unparalleled.

Leaving (Y/n)'s side momentarily, Lao quietly stepped out of the bedroom and made his way to the wardrobe. He selected a soft, comfortable set of clothes, mindful of her delicate condition and the need for gentle fabrics. Each item was chosen with care, a silent gesture of love and consideration.

Returning to the bedroom, Lao placed the fresh clothes on a nearby chair. He leaned over (Y/n), brushing a gentle kiss against her forehead, his lips lingering for a moment as he silently conveyed his love and support.

Lao picked up the clean clothes and began to dress her in them. He moved with a tenderness born out of an intimate understanding of her needs, his hands moving skilfully yet gently as he adorned her in the fresh garments.

With a final kiss to her forehead, Lao whispered, "You're strong, my love. We'll get through this together."

-

Raiden had explained to Kung Lao that the only way to break the curse was to locate Shang Tsung and have him directly remove it, or wait until the pregnancy was over and the child was born.

The weight of the situation laid heavy upon Lao's shoulders, and he knew very well that he couldn't simply wait around while his lover suffered the horrifying effects of the curse. The thought of allowing (Y/n) to endure more pain and torment was unbearable to him.

With steely determination, Lao looked at Raiden and spoke with conviction in his voice.

"We cannot wait any longer. We must find Shang Tsung and confront him. I cannot stand idly by while (Y/n) suffers. I will do whatever it takes to protect her."

Raiden nodded in agreement, his gaze filled with a mix of empathy and resolve.

"I understand your anguish, Kung Lao. Let us track down Shang Tsung and put an end to his wicked deeds once and for all. We will not rest until (Y/n) is free from this curse."

As much as he didn't want to leave (Y/n)'s side, he knew that he had to deal with this. He had to be the one to put the sorcerer in his place, he had to be the one to ensure that Shang Tsung knew to stay far away from his family. He wouldn't rest otherwise.

He left (Y/n) in the hands of his best friend, Liu, allowing him to take care of her while he set out on this treacherous task. He trusted no one else with her.

With a heavy heart, Lao bid farewell to (Y/n), knowing that she was in capable hands. He assured her that he would return as swiftly as possible, his determination fuelling his every step.

The path to Shang Tsung's lair was fraught with danger, testing Kung Lao's physical prowess and mental fortitude. He faced formidable adversaries, engaged in gruelling battles, and overcame treacherous traps with unwavering focus.

Finally, after what felt like an eternity, Kung Lao stood at the threshold of Shang Tsung's domain. The sorcerer's presence loomed before him, a chilling reminder of the pain he had inflicted upon (Y/n) and their unborn child.

There, the sorcerer stood, menacing, as he looked down at Lao and Raiden from his place atop the top step of his grand staircase. He clapped his hands together a few times, providing a condescending applause to the warrior who had made it this far.

"Well done, Kung Lao, for making it this far. I sense your goals, why you're here," Shang Tsung sneered, his voice dripping with malice. "But do you truly think defeating me will erase the curse? The curse upon your wife and unborn child runs deeper than you can comprehend."

Kung Lao's grip tightened on his weapon, his eyes burning with rage.

"Tell me, sorcerer, why did you curse them? What is your sick game?"

Shang Tsung chuckled, relishing the opportunity to taunt his adversary.

"Oh, Kung Lao, it's simple. I curse those who possess something I desire. Your bloodline is powerful, and your child would have been a threat to my plans. How could I forget your ancestor, the great Kung Lao? By cursing your wife and child, I ensure that their potential is forever tainted."

Kung Lao's jaw clenched as he listened to Shang Tsung's twisted explanation.

"You dare meddle with my family's fate for your selfish desires?" Lao spat, his voice laced with defiance. "You underestimate the strength that runs through our bloodline. We will rise above this curse, and your plans will crumble."

Shang Tsung's eyes gleamed with malicious delight.

"Oh, how amusing it is to witness your futile resistance. Your confidence will be your downfall, Kung Lao. I eagerly await the day when your hopes are shattered."

Each word which fell from Shang Tsung's lips seemed to fuel Lao's rage more and more. The sorcerer's callous disregard for the lives he had affected, his arrogance in underestimating their strength, ignited a fire within Lao that burned with an intensity he had never felt before.

With a primal roar, Lao unleashed his fury upon Shang Tsung, his strikes swift and powerful. Every blow carried the weight of his love for (Y/n) and their unborn child, driving him forward with unwavering determination.

The clash of their forces echoed through the chamber, the sound of metal meeting magic reverberating in the air. Lao's resolve hardened with each exchange, his movements precise and calculated. He had honed his skills for this very moment, and he would not let Shang Tsung's curse go unanswered.

With every strike, Lao channelled his frustration, his anger, and his love into his attacks. He fought with a determination fuelled by the knowledge that he was not only fighting for his family but for all those who had suffered under Shang Tsung's cruelty.

Their battle became a dance of fury and skill, as Lao anticipated Shang Tsung's every move and countered with unparalleled precision. He weaved through the sorcerer's dark spells, dodging and deflecting them with a grace born of years of training.

Lao's weapon, a testament to his heritage and training, sliced through the air, meeting Shang Tsung's defences with unwavering force. Blow after blow, Lao pushed himself to the limits, refusing to yield to the sorcerer's malevolence.

The chamber crackled with energy as their powers clashed, the very fabric of reality trembling under their duel. Lao's determination radiated from him, his eyes burning with an intensity that matched the blazing fire within his heart.

In a final, decisive moment, Lao delivered a devastating blow, striking at the heart of Shang Tsung's defences. The sorcerer's grip on power weakened, his face contorted with a mix of disbelief and defeat.

He looked down at the sorcerer, a scowl on his face, though he felt a sense of relief wash over him. He was defeated, it was over now.

A harsh cackle echoed throughout the land, and Lao furrowed his brows when he found that the source was Shang Tsung.

"I did tell you...that defeating me would not remove the curse..." he wheezed, the smirk on his face emanating the evil in his cold heart, "she will carry the curse...until your child is born...though, she'll likely kill herself before then."

Lao's heart dropped as Shang Tsung erupted into more evil laughter. He realised what he had just done - perhaps this was an unintentional rouse, one to get him away from his self destructive wife.

Without wasting another moment, Lao began on his journey back to his home. His steps were frantic, fuelled by a mix of fear and guilt. Raiden tried to reassure him that this was not his fault, though nothing could've convinced him in that moment.

As they arrived home, the first thing Lao did was rush to his room, where his wife would be resting. However, he was shocked to find that she had been bound to the bed by ropes which were tied to each corner of the bed, with Liu Kang sitting patiently beside her. She was asleep, but breathing heavily and sweating, all pale.

"What is the meaning of this? Why is (Y/n) restrained?" Lao's voice trembled with a mix of concern and frustration as he approached his friend. "Lao, I am sorry that it had to come to this, but it's for her own good," Liu began holding his hands up in a way which he hoped would display his sincerity. "She has become too dangerous...so much that not even I can keep her safe without going to drastic measures. First, it was the baby she was trying to harm. But now...it is also herself."

Liu approached (Y/n) again, ushering for Lao to join him as he brushed the hair away from her face and pointed to her throat.

"Do you see that?" he asked, referring to the little cut which was present where he pointed, "had I not caught her wrist at the moment I did, she would've drove that knife right into her throat."

Lao's heart sank as he saw the cut on (Y/n)'s throat, realizing the gravity of the situation. The mix of concern and fear washed over him, and he struggled to hold back tears of anguish.

"(Y/n)," Lao's voice quivered as he reached out to touch her cheek gently. "I'm so sorry my love..."

Tears welled up in Lao's eyes, threatening to spill over, as he leaned closer to (Y/n), his forehead resting against hers.

"Please, hold on for me. It'll all be over soon, I promise."

As he whispered to her, the tears in his eyes finally spilled, falling onto his lover's face. He began sobbing, cupping her face in his hands.

Raiden placed a hand on Liu Kang's shoulder, catching his attention as he turned to him.

"Come, Liu Kang," he said, "let us give them a moment alone."

Liu nodded once, and they left the room.

Lao's sobs filled the room as he held (Y/n) close, pouring out his heartache and desperation in that intimate moment. He clung to her, his grip firm yet gentle, as if trying to transfer his strength and love into her wounded soul.

Outside the room, Liu Kang and Raiden stood together, their expressions solemn and resolute. Liu's eyes glistened with unshed tears, mirroring the pain he felt for his friend and the woman he considered family. Raiden's gaze held a mix of sorrow and determination, his commitment to their cause unwavering.

It was horrifying to know that nothing could be done about it except for wait it out, though they would assist Kung Lao in these trying times and ensure that (Y/n) and her baby would come out of this situation safe.

-

Screams of pain echoed throughout the Kung home, as the three men rushed around the house, gathering the supplies they would need for the delivery of (Y/n)'s baby.

Kung Lao asked that Liu gather towels and a basin of hot water for his wife, while he asked that Raiden stay by her side and use his powers to keep her pain to a minimum.

Though, even when the pain had subsided for the most part, the screams continued. Screams of terror.

She did not want to deliver this baby.

Even so, Lao was determined to have this baby come into the world, healthy and happy. He knew his lover was bewitched, that her heavy reluctance was only a result of Shang Tsung's evil.

He and Liu entered the room, frantic as they prepared everything for the birth of this child. Kung Lao approached his lover, who was writhing in her restraints, trying to break free. He grabbed her hand, leaning over her and brushing the hair out of her face.

"(Y/n), my love, I am here with you," he whispered, his words a soothing melody amidst the chaos. "You are a beautiful warrior, and your strength surpasses any curse."

He could feel her grip tightening on his hand, her fingers digging into his skin, seeking solace in their connection.

"I...I can't..." she shuddered, shaking her head. "I can't...I'm so scared."

"You must, (Y/n)," Lao encouraged her, squeezing her hand a little tighter, "you have come much too far to give up now. You mustn't let Shang Tsung's evil cloud your mind. Have faith in me."

In amongst all of her fear, (Y/n) couldn't help but feel a sense of relief wash over her when she stared up at her lover, who was just as afraid and desperate as she was in that moment. Even when she was convinced that she was about to give birth to the anti-Christ, she would always feel more compelled to trust Lao, even if all she had was his word alone.

Lao noticed the way she seemed to relax a little at his words, and he felt his own body relax as well, looking toward Liu and Raiden, ready to give them instruction and ensure the safe delivery of this baby.

He established that he wanted Raiden to use his powers to ensure that (Y/n)'s pain was kept to a minimum, while he and Liu sat by the end of the bed and delivered the baby themselves.

(Y/n) clasped onto Raiden's hand as tight as she could, while he administered his healing power through their contact. The other two men had finished preparing things on their end, watching as the baby began surfacing as Liu held a towel beneath the site and Lao had his hands ready to guide the baby's head.

With each push, (Y/n)'s determination grew stronger, fueling her resolve to bring their baby into the world. Kung Lao's hands, steady and gentle, guided the baby's head as it began to emerge, his eyes filled with a mixture of awe and tenderness.

Liu Kang swiftly and delicately caught the baby, cradling the tiny, wriggling form in the waiting towel. The room was filled with a collective gasp of awe and overwhelming joy as the cries of their new-born filled the air.

Kung Lao's eyes teared up as he took in his child for the very first time. In that moment, as he held their baby in his arms, the world seemed to fade away, and all that mattered was the precious life they had brought into existence.

Despite being covered in muck and blood, Kung Lao saw nothing but beauty in their child. Every tiny feature, every wrinkle, filled him with an overwhelming sense of awe and unconditional love.

With trembling hands, he reached out to gently wipe away the remnants of birth from their baby's delicate face. Each touch was imbued with tenderness, a silent promise to shield their child from harm and to be a constant source of love and support.

Naturally, he would approach his exhausted lover, and bring the child to her, gently laying the new soul onto (Y/n)'s chest. The baby's small form rested against her, their heartbeats synchronizing, a physical manifestation of the unbreakable connection between mother and child.

Kung Lao's hands gently supported their baby's delicate head, his touch light yet steady, as he watched (Y/n) marvel at the miracle lying in her embrace. Their child's tiny fingers curled instinctively around (Y/n)'s own, as if seeking comfort and reassurance.

Silent tears cascaded down (Y/n)'s cheeks, mixing with tears of joy and exhaustion. They looked down at their child, their eyes filled with a blend of overwhelming emotions. In that moment, a newfound strength and tenderness radiated from within them, a fierce maternal love that knew no bounds.

Upon viewing her daughter for the first time, (Y/n) felt her paranoia and fear wash away. She knew this would happen - because the curse was broken, and she and her child had survived.

Together, they basked in the miracle of their child's arrival, their hearts overflowing with a love that seemed to defy any limits. In that sacred space, time seemed to stand still, and the world outside faded away as they forged an unbreakable bond as a family.

-

[she-karev]

The Worst Day (Andrew DeLuca x Alex Karev’s Sister Angst with a Happy Ending)

Previous Chapter Here

Age Rating: 12+

Chapters: Three of Three

Fandom: Grey’s Anatomy

Ship: Andrew DeLuca x Amber Karev (Alex Karev’s Sister)

Canon Episode: Season 17 Episode 6

AN: As far as I’m concerned the GIF above is how the episode ended but this story tells a happier ending than the one we got so hold on till the next chapter when Amber and Andrew officially reconcile. Like and reblog below and the next story will be released tomorrow.

Summary: Amber and Carina hear from Hunt and Altman about DeLuca.

Words: 757

April 30th, 2020

Carina sits at the pew alone feeling like she has cried all her tears out. Her girlfriend, Maya Bishop, went out to talk to a nurse about an update. While she does this Carina is trying to keep herself from imagining the worst because she knows the worst will destroy her.

Even in separate countries her brother has always been by her side, supporting her and annoying her when he can. The thought of living in a world without her sweet baby brother in it is too much for her to take. She can only hope the doctors in that room will fix him and he can live to support her and annoy her for years to come.

While this runs through her head she senses a person sitting next to her. She looks to her right to see Amber Karev has joined her at the front row. Her eyes are red and puffy and her cheeks are stained with tears same as Carina. Carina knows that if it was Maya on the table she would be wrecked as well. So, she holds Amber’s hand letting her know she is not alone in her grief.

“It was Rumours.” Carina looks at her brother’s ex-girlfriend confused by her numb sentence. She sees Amber sniffling before explaining, “When we talked at that skeevy bar the night we met, a Fleetwood Mac song was playing on the jukebox. It wasn’t Chain it was Leather and Lace, the song was Leather and Lace. We learned that we both loved the Rumours album, and we talked about it. We talked about the history and the underappreciated songs and how I was named after one of the singers. He was the first stranger in a long time that I could stand talking to for more than five minutes.”

The Night They Met Here

A small whimper escapes Carina knowing just how loving her brother can be, “He…He was the first person who looked at me the way he did that night. He was the first person who made me feel things I never felt with anyone and it was just from one look. He was the first person who…who showed how to love and made me feel loved.”

Carina inhales shakily holding Amber’s hand tighter, and she does the same, “It was Rumours that made me start to fall in love with him.”

“He was head over heels the moment he met you bambina.” Carina tells Amber in comfort, “He didn’t say it, but I knew he was falling in love with you. He still does.”

Amber swallows the lump in her throat sniffling, “I do too. I want him to know that, more than anything I want him to know the feeling never went away. He needs to know that he needs to.”

Carina and Amber hold hands sharing their pain and grief until they hear the doors open and immediately stand up. Hunt and Altman enter the chapel with Maya in front. She stands next to Carina who puts her mask on along with Amber. Jackson stands up from his pew in the back to hear this news next to Amber. He hopes this isn’t when he has to hold her while she breaks down in tears on the floor. He listens to Hunt along with the rest who look on anxiously.

“We had to remove his spleen, but the wound was mostly superficial. He’s pulled through.”

Amber gasps at this, “Oh my god.” Jackson exhales the breath he was holding relieved by this news as well as Carina who is gasping and crying in joy.

“Oh my god!” Maya is next to her smiling behind her mask at the good news, “Oh it hurts not to hug you right now.”

Maya has Carina face her, “Hey look at them while you hug me.” Carina laughs in joy and does so hugging Maya while she looks at Hunt and Altman saying thank you.

“Thank you, thank you so much.” Amber sniffles and begins to cry in joy with a smile behind her mask holding onto Jackson’s arm for support feeling like she’s gonna collapse from the basking relief. The surgeons leave them in the chapel to rejoice.

“Come here kid you need a hug.” Jackson pulls Amber into a hug that she doesn’t protest. Instead, she wraps her arms around him and cries in relief against his shoulder as a smile forms behind her mask at the man she loves living to hear her confess her love for him once and for all.

Next Part Here

[incorrectmarvelquotesss]

— frozen hearts: epilogue —

Warnings: strong language, fluff, angst, panic attack, mentions of past abusive relationships, sexual themes (nothing graphic)

Word Count: ~10k

A/N: We’re officially officially at the end of the series. If anyone wants to talk about it (I want to talk about it), please send in asks and messages. Just so we’re clear this is taking place a year after the start of the series. It also probably has a few typos, so please let me know where they are so I can fix them! Reblogs are always appreciated and welcome! Enjoy!

Series Masterlist || Main Masterlist || Join My Taglist ||

December 21st

“We’re going to be late!” You called out, voice echoing through the somewhat empty apartment. The suitcases had already been placed inside the car, three duffel bags waiting for you to pick them up on the side of the shoe rack. There were some boxes piled up in the corner, books and sweaters pouring out of them. You made a mental note to pack those properly as soon as you came back to your little home. 

Your boot was now tapping against the welcome mat, arms crossed and a scowl on your face as a pair of stupidly blue eyes finally peeked out from the corner wall. His soft dark hair had grown and been cut several times in the past year or so, but it still flopped onto his forehead and in front of his eyes. 

“Sorry, doll,” Bucky started, his arms cradling the little bundle of joy that was starting to screech. “She’s not letting go of me.” 

You sighed and beckoned him over, taking the white ball of fur from him and scratching the top of her head. You had brought her home on a dull rainy day, finding her cooped up in a wet cardboard box in the back alleyway with no collar around her neck. Bucky was reluctant of the new member of the family, but he had glanced at her white hair and said Alpine. 

“Alpine’s just a daddy’s girl,” you whispered, looking up at him with bright eyes. Somehow, even with the slight stubble, messed up hair, a rip in his sleeve where Alpine had dug her claws in, he still managed to knock the breath out of you. 

“Just like her mommy then, ain’t she?” Bucky teased when your phone rang with your dad’s face and name plastered on the front. You rolled your eyes and grabbed your phone from his hand—he had taken it to talk to Matthew about the new attachment that he had wanted for his house, but Matthew spent the time talking about his baby boy and Bucky would be lying if he said he minded it. 

“Hello? Yeah. In a bit.” A hum followed by another. “Okay, see ya. Bye, love you too. Bye.” You looked up at Bucky, pecking him on the cheek—Alpine purred against your chest as a warning because she disliked the display in front of her—and then tilted your head as a way of telling him to leave now before Alpine caught onto your play. 

“I’ll get the bags in,” Bucky stated, grabbing the three duffel bags with no problem with his left hand. “You get her in her bed, lock up the place. Also, just check if the dispenser has enough cat food for her, will ya?” 

“Yeah, Bucky, I will.” 

The same smile that had appeared on his face when you first said his name plastered itself on his lips. It had never seized from showing, his dimples and eye crinkles making it worth it. Every time you said Bucky made him glow, like he couldn’t believe you actually called him by his name. You tried to use as much as possible, more often when he was in a sour mood or had just woken up from a nightmare. 

Those had decreased overtime, dying down to about twice a month unless something triggered him. You found those little ticks of his, the ones that meant he was uncomfortable, the ones you hadn’t noticed before. The first time you had noticed his eyes sweep to the exit, you had shrugged it off, but when his eyes kept trailing away from the crowd and you towards the door, you knew he wanted to leave. He was just too stubborn to say anything. The other antics came about and you learned to memorize them. 

After an argument about his stubbornness and feeling the need not to ask for help—especially because it broke your heart not being able to help him when he needed it most—you signed the two of you up for couples counseling. Bucky had a bit to say on the matter, feeling the fight drain from him when you pouted and told him that it was only for a little while anyway. He still had no defence against your pouty lips and tears. He quite literally dropped to his knees once in an argument when you teared up. 

“‘Kay, sweetheart. I’ll see you outside.” Bucky pecked your lips and then let his thumb caress the space between Alpine’s ears. “And I’ll see you in two weeks sometime.” With that, Bucky left the apartment, closing the door gently behind him as you started walking off to leave Alpine in her monitored room. 

Bucky insisted on using the little room—the one that was originally a storage room—for Alpine, saying that the little one deserved her own room. You didn’t mind it one bit. Plus, you got a gorgeous view of his back muscles and abs and seeing that metal arm being put to good use and the other one flex while carrying heavy materials. Yeah, you distracted him and he got distracted once or twice or maybe five times. But, in the end, Alpine had her own little room with her too big cat scratcher, food dispenser, and little security cameras so that you two could watch her behaviour. 

You bent down and watched her scurry off to climb the scratcher and curl up on the second landing. “Bye, Alpine.” She meowed in response and you figured it would be best to lock the window and door, seeing last time you and Bucky went out for date night, she had somehow managed to get out. 

After that, you locked the front door and made your way down the three flights of stairs, the elevator still stuck from three months ago. You never minded the exercise and you definitely never minded the way Bucky would pick you up from behind and carry you up just because he could. He had opened up with the PDA and, while you loved having his presence, it made you flustered furiously everytime. 

You hadn’t known how much he was holding back from saying and doing things during your days last year. He spent every second of any moment near you whispering sweet nothings or something vulgar enough to leave you breathless. Sometimes he would keep his hand on your back, other times it was wrapped around your shoulders or waist. If he wasn’t near enough to either of those, his eyes would find yours, crinkling up and giving you a look that was full of love. 

Opening the main entrance, you were pelted with the harsh wind and snow bullets flurrying along with it. You shivered and tugged your coat closer to yourself, wishing you had listened to Bucky and put on that stupid scarf. You had been distracted while he was telling you that anyway; he was rolling his sleeves up before doing the dishes. Your shivers were over quickly because Bucky pulled his car in front of you—the one that he specifically bought for the two of you after a few dates of using his motorcycle and Steve’s car. 

Bucky rushed out to rush you in, and with his sweet and gentle pushes, you sat down in the passenger seat. The car door closed just as you shuffled your body on the seat and started buckling up. 

“Should I blast more heat? You think you’re fine? You should’ve worn the damn scarf, y’know? I told you it’s gonna be cold and you didn’t even bother putting on gloves. Come here—” Bucky grabbed your hands and put them in front of the vent, eyebrows furrowing as he felt your icy hands in his warm ones. “You gotta listen, doll. You get sick in the winter and, as much as I don't mind caring for you when you’re sick, you sure do suck the breath outta me when you are. You were sick for five days straight with the highest fever I’ve ever seen last time and—” 

“Bucky,” you stressed out, noticing the tension leave his shoulders slightly and his eyes darted up to meet yours. “I’m okay. My hands are sweating and the temperature is fine. You should start driving before we get caught in traffic and are late for our flight.” 

Bucky sighed and hesitated but obligated eventually when you pouted. 

December 22nd

You stirred awake to hushed whispers and little giggles, blinking away the fuzz and trying to decipher what was going on. The room was dark, but the time on the clock told you it was half past eight. The usual arms around your waist were still there, but the muscles were tensing and loosening every now and then. You sucked in a breath and turned around, greeting the sight of Nate and Dan jumping up and down on the bed with raised eyebrows directed at Bucky. 

“G’morning, doll,” Bucky whispered, kissing your cheek. “I love you.” That was the daily greeting, whether it was verbal or not. Sometimes he would get up for an early meeting with some investors—his architectural firm was growing rapidly after designing the Stark Tower for Tony—and leave with a note placed on your night table, his loopy handwriting reminding you that he loved you loads. 

“Love you, too.” You looked over at the twins and they both chimed in a greeting, huffing and falling down with their bodies draping over Bucky. Bucky groaned at their weight, but you all knew better—he was more than capable of picking up the twins and spinning them around like he had yesterday. 

After Matthew came to grab the twins, you and Bucky got ready for the day. There were gentle teasing hands trailing up your waist at points, making you unsteady and set your whole being on fire. Once that was over, you provoked Bucky by putting on Sam’s hoodie and inhaling it deeply to put on more of a show. Bucky wasn’t impressed and practically tackled you to the bed and convinced you to take it off. There were some elements of persuasion that worked better than others on you, and Bucky knew every single one of them. 

You barely made it downstairs when Bucky’s phone rang. It had started ringing a lot more in the last three months than ever before. Business associates and potential clients started contacting Barnes & Co. and that would lead them straight to Bucky. Even with Wade, Bucky’s personal assistant, scheduling appointments left and right, Bucky still ended up taking more calls than he wanted. 

“I have to—”

“I’ll wait in the kitchen, Buck,” you whispered, giving his lips a peck and then making your way towards the kitchen. It was bustling with noise, clicks and clanks of pots and spoons making the cabin a home. The sweet and fresh scent of ginger lingered in the air as you stepped in to see your family. 

Hailey and Jake had arrived a week ago with Vanessa, Dylan, and their 10-month-old baby girl, Inara. They said they wanted to stay longer this time around, but you knew that they were facing problems with Jake’s family. They had a strict upbringing and conservative mindsets. So when Hailey started to work again a few months ago, they started dousing Hailey with the fault that she wasn’t going to be there for her kids as they grow. Jake stood by Hailey’s side every step of the way and you were glad for that. 

TJ and Diya weren’t going to be able to make this time around, but Isabelle and Lea were already here. Lea was a carbon copy of her mother, with the same long black hair and emerald eyes. But she had her father’s facial shape, in a more feminine way, but it was her father’s genes that made that part of her up. Lea was hunched over a book, eyes darting around the page and unphased by the commotion around her. Isabelle was swatting Jake’s hand away from the pan, giving him a glare and mumbled something under her breath that made Jake grin. 

Skylar and Tyler would be coming in tomorrow, having wrapped up their terms and exams. Deanna and Xavier would come on Christmas Eve with Harry and a new addition, Evie, a six-year-old girl. Your grandparents were supposed to be here today, but the snow storm on their end had their flight postponed. 

“Hello, honey,” your mom said, grabbing your elbow and dragging you to a seat next to your dad. You raised an eyebrow and looked between them suspiciously; there was no mistaking that cooing tone in your mom’s voice. 

“Okay,” you drawled out, shaking your head. “Nope. I’m not getting into the middle of this—whatever it is.”

“Oh, but—” 

“Nope.” You shared a look with Matthew and he grinned at you, tilting his head as if to say jokes on you. You ignored him after sticking your tongue at him. 

December 23rd

Bucky stirred awake, pulling you closer into his chest and burrowing his head into your neck. His hazy brain barely registered the kiss you dropped on his hand, lingering slightly before you started pulling away from him. His arm tightened around you, eyes snapping open and finding yours already on him with pursed lips. His gaze flickered around your face quickly, mapping out why exactly you were getting up, leaving him in bed by himself, this early in the morning. 

“What’re you doing?” His voice was raspy and low, breaking in between the vowels, but he could see the way it relaxed you slightly. 

“Need to use the bathroom,” you whispered, eyes darting away and cheeks burning. He raised an eyebrow, knowing you were lying. His grip faltered and you took the escape, dragging your feet to the bathroom. The door shut and locked with a click, making his eyebrows furrow even further. You never locked the bathroom anymore. 

You had closed off before, early on in the relationship when Bucky was still taking you out on dates and earning bits of your love. You had pulled away from his touch during a morning coffee date, lifting your hand close to your chest and shaking your head gently. Even with his chest squeezing in on his heart, he had accepted your choice with a pained smile on his face. It’s okay he had reassured you, leaning back in his chair and giving you the space and time you needed. 

You weren’t ready for his touch when the two of you were walking back to yours, nor the next day when he brought pizza for the hockey game, or the next when he was over for your weekly game night. Natasha had sent him questioning glares, scowling when he sat a few feet away from you on the three-seater. Steve already knew—Bucky being in a quieter state than usual and staring at his phone whenever it was lying somewhere near. 

And he was fine with waiting for you. He could spend his whole life waiting for you and he would still wait afterwards. 

When you were ready to talk to him and touch him again, you had called him. It was the dead of night and Bucky was already passed out, but he had woken himself up to talk to you. He listened to you apologize and explain that it was an impulsive thing, that it wouldn’t happen all the time. It was triggered with a phone call from Matt Murdock about the case, telling you that Rumlow was being detained for violating his restraining order. Even though that meant that Rumlow was a safe distance from you, you couldn’t help but think that he was going to find a way to get out. 

Bucky got up and started towards the bathroom, knocking twice and asking, “Can I come in, doll?” A few seconds passed before the tell-tale click sounded in the silence and Bucky pushed open the door to find you teary-eyed. You lunged at him, wrapping your arms around his neck and burying your face into the curve of it. Bucky’s arms went around your middle, tugging your body towards him as one hand trailed up to the back of your head. He scratched your scalp and kissed your temple, laying his cheek against it. 

———

You wanted to spend the day lounging in bed with Bucky and watch a movie, no matter how insistent he was about the scene. It wasn’t like he didn’t want to spend time with you—he often complained about how much less time he got to spend in your presence nowadays—but you rarely saw your family. However, you were stubborn enough for him to give in, only going down to tell your mom that you weren’t feeling all that well and wanted to spend the day upstairs in your room. With the slight blush on his cheeks and hair out of place, you could tell he was teased about the plans you had. You felt the tiniest bit of guilt, but it was overpowered by the urge to tease him about it more. 

“You alright there, Bucky?” You asked, teasing tone making him huff out a breath, feigning annoyance as he eyed you wearily. 

“You seem perfectly fine,” he said, placing a knee on the bed and crawling to hover over you with a cocked eyebrow. 

In all honesty, you had started to feel better about two hours ago when he had knocked on that door and held you while you cried. But you didn’t feel up to talking to your family and wanted to stay out of their sight until you felt ready for all that. You also had the sudden urge to just feel Bucky today. You wanted nothing more than to be in his arms, drowned in his scent, wearing his hoodie, and watching a movie you two fought over in your shared bed. 

“I feel better when I’m with you,” you mumbled, gently pulling his head down with your hands behind his neck. You stopped pulling when his nose bumped yours, nudging you to pull him further down, but you stopped there. He let out a shaky breath, eyes darkening the longer you kept the distance between your lips. His eyes darted between yours, finding the challenge in them, before swearing under his breath. 

“Fuck it.” He placed his lips against yours, kissing you with an urgent need that set your whole being on fire. Every fibre and bone suddenly trembled in excitement as he pushed down and let his body press against yours. His lips started to move, leaving a trail of heat and goosebumps. Down your jaw, pressing against your pulse point a bit harder, and dragging his teeth on a sensitive spot on the curve of your neck, his lips gave you every bit they had to offer. 

Everything from there turned into a blur, clothes mixing up on the floor as you both tried to get closer to each other. 

Gentle fingertips traced your body, lips finding the places that made you squirm and his lips turn up into a smirk. Another hand, cold to the touch, but gentle touching on your skin, came to your hip to keep you grounded. His lips landed on yours once more, one hand skimming down to bring you to the edge and let you fall. Whispers and hushed voices echoed in the room, keeping the volume to a minimum. Slowly he delved through you, taking you apart and putting you back together twice before reaching his own high. 

Deep inhales and exhales overtook the quiet moans that had escaped your lips as Bucky gently lowered his body weight onto you, biting your shoulder playfully. You chuckled and swatted his arm, exaggerating your breathing to tease him about his heavy body draped over yours. He lifted his body, raising an eyebrow as he kissed up your neck. He favoured his metal arm as he slid a hand down your side, squeezing your hip with a smirk when you squirmed and brushed against him. 

“We need to take a shower,” you whispered, feeling his lips press into your neck once more. 

“Together?” His voice sent shivers through your body. “Scandalous.” He pressed a few more kisses on your neck and then lifted you up with him without even a huff, walking towards the bathroom. 

December 24th

“How does the arm work?” Vanessa asked, flopping down next to Bucky before deciding to climb onto his lap. She twisted her legs, hitting a spot that almost made him keel over, and sat crossed-legged on his lap. You hid a smile, but Bucky caught it anyway. 

“What do you mean, princess?” Bucky raised an eyebrow and caught the way she looked over at her dad for some sort of reassurance. Once she found it, she gestured to his shoulder, right where metal met skin. 

“I mean, how does it move?” She furrowed her eyebrows cutely. “We learned a little about the nervous system in class. The teacher said that our…um, body parts were connected to our brain and the brain sends messages to the body part when we want to move it. But your arm isn’t really…” 

Bucky tilted his head and filled in, “Organic?” 

Bucky knew where this was going, but he couldn’t bring himself to care about it. Vanessa, like the rest of your family, was more than respectful with her questions. No one had ever said something off-handedly about his arm, not even after yesterday’s incident of his detached arm when you two had finally ventured down. He had always been ready to answer any questions they might have had, but no one ever asked him any. 

“Yeah, I guess. It’s made of metal and we learned that if someone gets a part cut off—wait, there was a word she said…”

“Amputated?” 

“Yeah! Amputated.” It wasn’t perfect, but it was the best she could say it so Bucky smiled for her to continue. “When that happens, you can’t put it back, like teeth. After your baby teeth fall out, the adult ones won’t have a—a, uh, replacement.” Vanessa gave him a crooked smile, eyes shimmering with pride. 

“You are so smart, princess,” Bucky praised, ruffling her hair a little and laughing when she wrinkled her nose and swatted at his hand. “Well, you see, this arm was a gift from Princess Shuri and—”

“Princess Shuri?” Vanessa beamed and jumped a little at the name. “We read about her. She’s so cool. She’s a princess, but then she’s also a scientist.” Bucky grinned at the way she slightly mispronounced the word scientist and felt his heart swell with the way she thought highly about Shuri. He would tell Shuri about this encounter later. 

“Yeah. She gave me the arm after I helped King T’Challa.” Vanessa squealed and turned a violent shade of red. Bucky raised an eyebrow and looked over at Jake. 

“Celebrity crush,” Jake sighed, shrugging and giving Hailey a look that meant it was her fault somehow. Hailey merely shrugged and winked over at you. 

“King T’Challa is a perfect gentleman,” she said simply, letting you giggle and Bucky scowl at the way you nodded along with her. 

“Seriously, doll?” Bucky shook his head and turned back to Vanessa. “That man is married and you are way too young to have a crush on him.”

“Fine,” Vanessa groaned out, rolling her eyes and then grinning. “Can you tell me how she made it move?” 

“Well, it’s connected to the part of my brain that sends those messages to move to my limbs. It’s a little chip that she had to put in, right here—” Bucky pointed to the spot above his ear— “with a little needle.”

“Did it hurt?” Vanessa’s voice was small and timid as she brushed her fingers over the spot Bucky had pointed at. Bucky’s voice got lost in his throat before he cleared it and shook his head, unable to trust his voice. “Oh. That’s good.”

“Yeah,” Bucky whispered, clearing his throat again to get rid of the burning sensation there. “Shuri made sure it wouldn’t hurt.”

“Does it ever hurt? Like when it’s cold or too hot?” 

“No, not really.” Bucky tilted his head in thought. “Sometimes it aches, hurts when it’s cold. Just over here.” He pointed at the spot where metal met skin. Vanessa frowned and looked around. She spotted a blanket at the corner of the couch and grabbed it, putting it around Bucky’s shoulders. 

“There,” she announced after smacking his head with her elbow by accident and adjusting the blanket to drape over his shoulders like a cape. “We can keep you warm so it doesn’t hurt.” 

Bucky felt his breath lodge up in his throat and his heart contracted in his chest at the gesture. He blew out a breath and pulled Vanessa into his chest, eyes tearing up a little. Vanessa giggled and muttered something along the lines of don’t tickle me before wrapping her arms around his waist as much as she could with her tiny arms. He locked eyes with Jake who was watching on with a teary smile and then he looked away when Vanessa pulled away. 

December 25th

Bucky’s voice echoed through the house from the top of the stairs, yelling your name as loud as he could. The silence in the living room was deafening, everyone’s eyes coming to land on you with some sort of accustory expression on their faces. Dim red, green, and white lights flickered in their eyes and on their face. The lights of the Christmas tree weren't enough for your family, so your dad flicked on the main lights as he walked towards the hallway bathroom. Your mom looked at you with raised eyebrows and pursed lips, an expression that you knew meant she wanted an answer right away. 

You shrugged, keeping your grin from breaking out on your face by biting the insides of your cheeks. When Nate and Dan came in, snickering and giggling, Matthew traded a deadpan stare with Tania, bouncing baby Gabriel on one of his knees while Tania’s arms were filled with a sleepy Ariel. Matthew then turned his head to give you a glare, knowing he was going to be dragged into your mom’s lecture since his kids were involved somehow. 

Bucky was right behind the boys, in all his sparkling glory. His hair was streaked with silver, the overhead lights hitting him just right to showcase your handy work. From his hair to his shoulders, he was doused in glitter and leaving a track behind him. Silver glitter was stuck to every inch of his face, a few sparkles falling to the ground each time he took a breath or turned his head slightly. The glitter on his shoulders was trickling down to his black sweater and burgundy sweatpants. His socks were no better than his shoulders, sparkling in the light. 

He was identical to a disco ball. The thought had your remaining facade falling, breaking down into laughter as his scowl became prominent. Glitter fell from his face as he twisted his lips into a thin line, cheeks hollowing out as he glowered at you. Even without the glitter his glare would have done nothing to intimidate you. You only laughed harder, doubling over in your spot on the couch as he tried to glare at you harder. The glitter fell to the floor as he furrowed his sparkly eyebrows. 

He tried to move forward to get to you, maybe cover you in glitter, but stopped short when he realised you were sitting across the carpeted floor. The glitter would be a hassle to get out of the carpet and it seemed to dawn on him that you took that specific spot for a reason. 

Your mom was the first one to react after you, getting up and fussing over him, but not daring to touch the glitter. Her hands drifted around his body as if she was going to dust him off, but merely gestured to you with a finger. Frowning and shaking her head, she opened her mouth and closed it twice before finally speaking. 

“Y/N Y/M/N Y/S,” she started, dropping her hand and placing her hands on her hips. You were still giggling, even more so when she tried to glare at you too. She was never the intimidating one in the family—neither was your dad—and so you tried to stop laughing, but it only seemed to get worse. Especially when your dad walked in, stopping to look at Bucky, giving him a once over, and then keeled over laughing and slapping his knee. 

Bucky’s own facade was starting to crumble, lips twitching and eyebrows moving slightly. The glitter that fell from his face told you that he was holding it together with a string now. 

“He looks like a disco ball,” you stated, letting your lips curl up higher when Bucky pouted at you. You almost cooed at his face, finding the glitter coating his cheeks and eyebrows almost adorable and innocent. Matthew broke down at the comment, startling baby Gabriel and earning a quick swat from your mom who was close enough to do that. 

Nate and Dan were laughing, rolling on the floor loudly with Vanessa rolling her eyes at them and muttering boys under her breath. Her lips did, however, curl into a sly smile when Bucky looked over at the twins with an exasperated sigh. Jake was trying his best to be polite, snickering into his fisted hand and covering his smile with a hand while Hailey was shaking her head at the mess around Bucky’s feet. She tugged baby Inara closer to her chest and leaned back, unable to keep her smirk off her face. Everyone else joined in slowly, giggling when Lea high-fived you. 

“Merry Christmas,” you mouthed at Bucky, falling into another fit of laughter as Bucky’s grin finally broke out on his face. 

December 26th

The snow trickled down, landing in piles on the curb and turning into slush on the sidewalk. Your boots collided with concrete with a soft squish, breath turning into vapour as you took a deep breath and brought your hands up to warm them. The gloves you had worn were thin and wet after throwing snow at Bucky. He was trudging next to you, a feather-like imprint of his hand on your back as he navigated through the small town he had taken you to. Most of the shops were closed and those that were open were celebrating Boxing Day, sales going up to 70% in this part. 

Bucky’s hand bunched up your jacket, dragging you abruptly towards a small shop that was nestled between two huge buildings. He smirked when you swatted his arm, about to scold him for pulling you so harshly when your eyes landed on the display window. There were books lining the display, classics and modern titles all adorned on several small floating shelves for passersby to look at. Your eyes flickered up to the name, Stan’s Corner, as Bucky rattled the knob, twisting the keys in his hands. 

He grabbed your hand and pulled you inside, moving you in front of him so that he could lock the door and let you awe over the bookstore. The shelves that adorned the walls were filled with books, not one space empty. The lights overhead weren’t white, weren’t LED, but the yellow hue these lights gave made the bookstore all that much warmer. Bucky’s palms were pressing between your shoulder blades all too soon to guide you through the front shelves to the cashier counter. 

“How—How did you get the keys?” You stuttered, chuckling airly as you turned to face him. You were sure your eyes were dazed, stars flying around your head, and a heart floating in front of you. Bucky shrugged, ears and cheeks turning pink with his flustered state. 

“Met the owner when me and the boys were out getting new jackets,” Bucky said nonchalantly, the slight tremor in his voice telling you that he was nervous about this date. Since you two had gotten together, after the first date back last year, he had promised you to go on at least one date every week. This week, since you two were here, you had thought he would skip out on it—and you were fine with that—but he had told your parents he was taking you out today without hesitation. 

“And they just gave you the keys?” You bit your lip when that teasing smirk replaced his smile. 

“Are you implying I stole these, sweetheart?” He brought the keys up, dangling them between the two of you and jiggling them with a raised eyebrow. You giggled and shook your head, the glint in his eye making you lightheaded. “I just talked to him about bringing you here today, but he told me it was supposed to be closed ‘cause he had taxi work to do.”

“And then you stole them?” You joked, squealing when his cold hand slipped up your jacket and shirt to tickle your side. You tried to jump away from him, but his metal arm wrapped around your waist, trapping you against his chest. 

“I asked him for the keys for the day,” Bucky whispered, his breath hot against your temple. He placed a kiss there and added, “Thought you would like it.” 

The emotion in his tone made you lean into his body, molding into his chest as he wrapped his flesh arm around you too. The warm air in the store was starting to get to you, jacket ruffling as you unzipped it halfway before Bucky’s fingers replaced yours, tugging the zip down all the way. You tilted your head just enough to look him in the eyes. He swallowed, eyes flickering up from your chosen outfit—a velvet burgundy dress with a neckline that dipped down enough for him to adjust himself. 

“There’s some first edition books at the back that Stan collects. He said we can read them as long as there’s no stains or folded pages. Thought you’d like the back a bit more because there’s—”

“I love it, Bucky.” You turned in his arms, looping your arms around his neck and tugging at his locks affectionately. You placed your lips against his gently, only allowing a small peck before pulling back with shining eyes. “I love you.” 

“I love you too, doll.” Bucky kissed you, unable to wipe the smile off of either of your faces and smiling into the kiss. Bucky pulled away, his hand coming up to tuck a loose strand of your hair behind your ear. “I love you more. Now, let’s read.”

He pulled you towards the back where the first editions lined the bookshelves, couches and armchairs in front of it with a fluffy carpet covering the floor. You nudged Bucky, toeing off your boots and making him do the same. You could feel the fluffy texture through your socks, wiggling your toes in it before walking over to the shelves just to graze over the titles. Bucky flopped down on one of the armchairs, leaning his face against his fist and watching you with a smile on his face. 

He had deliberately planned dates like this twice before, not realizing the first time why his eyes were stuck on you. The first date in the summer, the one you wore the pretty blue number that you said matched his eye colour, he had wanted to take a trip to the zoo after a quick talk with Natasha about your love for baby animals. Once he had seen you coo over the tiger cubs and then the bear cubs, his heart had never felt more full. Then, during a week full of rain, he had a date lined up to be at the aquarium. He had spent the whole time with his eyes on you, gauging every little reaction you had. 

Now you lightly graze the spines of the books, gentle as if you were touching a flower petal, tilting your head slightly to mouth the titles to yourself. Murmuring something under your breath, you went on the line of books, reading each title and stroking the spines as you moved along. Your eyes lit up at a certain book title, letting your fingers press into the book a little harder and then smiled as you moved to the next book. His eyes drifted off from you for a second to get the title, grinning when he saw it was the first edition of The Hobbit. 

His eyes were back on you a moment later, storing the thought of asking Stan about buying the book off of him someday at the back of his head. 

“Buck?” Your voice was teasing, but the way you said his name left him breathless. You raised an eyebrow at him, pulling out a book delicately and holding it to your chest protectively. “Are you going to just watch me read?” 

Bucky shook his head with a smile, beckoning you over with a crooked finger and spreading his legs a little further than they already were. He grabbed your waist and dragged you down to sit on his thigh, closer to his torso, and then tugged your legs up with his hand gripping your thigh. His hand curled around your calf when it was close enough, leaning back and folding your legs on his lap. 

“You’re going to read to me,” he said lowly, voice husky as he kissed your neck and you squirmed on his lap. His fingers dipped under your dress and he added, “Don’t stop and you’ll get what you need.”

December 27th

The dark blue sky is clear for the first time in weeks since winter began. The stars dance and shimmer in the sky, happy to be seen and looked up at. They give a little show to onlookers and one falls to the never ending empty space, stroking the sky behind it in a dim white colour. The moon is small, a mere crescent in the sky, but it shines brighter than it has in days. The light from the moon trickles into the room through the blinds, illuminating your sleeping figure on the bed as Bucky stirs awake to the buzzing coming from somewhere on his side. 

Bucky's arm flung out to stop the insistent buzz, grabbing the cool phone off the night table and swiping the answer button without looking at the contact name. He gently maneuvers himself to face away from you, metal arm still stuck under your pillow when he whispers into the silent night. 

“Hullo?” Bucky slurred out, snapping out of his daze when he heard the sniffles through the speaker. He pulled the phone away from his ear, glancing at the name and sucking in a breath as he waited for Rebecca to speak. 

“Hi, Bucky,” she whispered, voice raspy and a sniffle following her greeting. 

“What happened?” He asked, worst case scenarios popping out in his mind as he shifted even further from you. You shifted towards his body heat, but he knew if he kept talking like this, you would wake up. After the long night you two spent awake, he wanted you to get the sleep you needed. 

“Bruce broke up with me,” she choked out, a sob crackling through the line. Bucky sat up after moving his arm from beneath your head, sitting up at the edge of it. Bucky ran a hand through his hair, unable to reason why exactly Rebecca had called him for that—she usually opted to keep him out of her love life and Bucky was fine with that, knowing she would much rather talk about it with her friends. He waited for Rebecca’s crying to seize before speaking. 

“Why?” He asked, eyes trained on the books lining your shelves. Rebecca inhaled and exhaled before answering his question. 

“Because he can’t—it’s because he can’t—” Rebecca broke off, inhaling sharply before whispering, “He can’t have kids.” 

“I, uh, well—did—did you two—have you—” Bucky cursed inwards for not having the proper words to ask what he wanted without making it weird and heard Rebecca sigh. 

“I should call someone else, shouldn’t I?” 

“Yeah, Becca” Bucky breathed out, shoulders relaxing slightly, but not enough to feel relaxed. “Call Nat, will ya? She can handle things like this—” Bucky felt the tapping on his shoulder and looked over his shoulder to see your slightly dazed eyes watching him. His phone drifted off from his ear slightly, just enough for your eyes to catch the movement. 

“You okay?” You whispered, shifting over to kneel behind him and press the heel of your palm in between his shoulder blades. You started massaging the tense muscles there and Bucky felt his shoulders loosen with your eyes on him. 

“Yeah,” he replied, uncertain about telling you about Rebecca’s current state and situation. The topic of kids was never brought up in the past year or so, both of you knowing it somewhat too early to talk about it. But now, Bucky was wishing he had brought up kids at some point and told you that he wanted them with you. 

You pressed your hand into his back a bit harder to bring him back, Rebecca’s voice coming through the phone in a low murmur. 

“I’m okay, but Becca, she, uh, broke up with her boyfriend—no, her boyfriend broke up with her and she wanted to—”

“Here,” you cut in, extending your arm out in front of him and opening your palm upwards for him to place his phone in. He fell back into your chest, keeping his weight light as he did so, and gave the phone to you without a question or hesitation. Your free hand came up to his hair, fingers raking through his hair and nails scraping at his scalp gently to relax him further into you. 

You shifted to sit crossed-legged and brought the phone up to your ear. 

“Hey, Becca?” Your eyes widened slightly as you shook your head. “No, no, no! I’m fine. Yeah. We’re going to talk about you and Bruce.” 

You certainly knew more about Rebecca’s love life than him. When you had timidly asked him if he was ever planning on reaching out to his family six months ago, he had initially shook his head. But a mere month later, he found himself dialling his mother’s number, always having it stored in his head, and greeting her with a choked hello, ma. It was an emotional conversation, his father’s cutting into his mother’s and becoming a jumbled mess. Calling you after cutting their call with the promise calling them back in a few hours, he had waited for you to come over before breaking down. 

Slowly, the conversations with his parents became easy, having caught up in life. They knew about you and the holiday you two had spent together and the way your gentle words had somehow brought Bucky back to them. Bucky was relieved when you and mother—even though he had scowled at the time—exchanged embarrassing stories about him. Rebecca had already called you her sister-in-law twice, laughing when you got flustered at the statements. His mom had only given him a knowing look through the screen and smiled when you started speaking again. 

“Okay?” You asked, yawning and giggling when Rebecca said something over the phone to you. “Well, you tell your brother that because he—” You laughed, chest moving with each sharp inhale and made Bucky’s head bob with it. 

“Sorry, okay. Yeah, alright. Take care. You too. Bye, bye.” You giggled as you hung up, placing the phone on his chest so that he could pick it up and place it back on the night table. You pressed a lingering kiss on his temple, moving some of his hair away from his eyes to look at him properly. 

“Let’s go to bed. We’ll see how she’s doing tomorrow when we meet her, ‘kay?” You said, kissing his head once more before starting to move behind him. He urged his body to move and laid back down, pulling you flush against him. 

“Since we’re already up—”

“No, James.” 

“Oh, but what if I do the thing with my tongue and—”

“Goodnight, Barney.” 

December 28th

With the growing line behind you and the closely huddled crowd beyond the gates, you could tell Bucky would need your help to get through. Although he hadn’t had a panic attack in a large crowd for two months now, you were always worried about his health. He had procrastinated the professional help he needed after losing his arm and then did nothing to meet the therapist halfway for the first six months. You knew he had a hard time opening up, especially when it came to his accident, but you had been furious with him when he had tried to conduct himself through a panic attack at one of Tony’s parties five or so months ago. 

You could have helped him. You told him that you felt as useless as he did last year at the mall when you were having a panic attack close to the bathrooms. Realising what you felt when he pushed you away, he let you guide him through his panic attack. 

Now, he tugged on your hand to push in front of him at the metal detectors, urging you to go before him. You went through the frame and grabbed your bag from the band, waiting for Bucky to go through. Luckily, vibranium wasn’t detected in these types of metal detectors so he didn’t need to detach his arm. He grabbed his duffel bag and your hand, swiping his thumb over your knuckles before bringing your hand up and pressing his lips into them. 

“I’m okay,” he whispered, winking at you when your mouth opened to retaliate and ask exactly how he knew you were worried. “You think too loud, doll.” You rolled your eyes at him and guided him through the airport towards the gate number you were supposed to be at five minutes ago. You had been late to get out of your room this morning, all blame going to Bucky when you saw the marks littering your chest and imprints of hands on your hips. 

He hadn’t even seemed the least bit remorseful when you shrugged on one of his hoodies that covered every little bruise. In fact, he had grinned and taken upon a smug expression as you two had made your way downstairs to say your goodbyes and leave for the airport. The flight heading to Brooklyn was a last minute plan, mostly because his mom hadn’t been sure if they were going to be home for the holidays or gone to Romania to visit her cousins. She had called two days before your flight to Canada, letting you two know that they were going to be home and you two were welcome to come over whenever. 

Bucky had scrambled to find flight tickets when you had told him you wanted to meet his parents and Rebecca. In person, because online videos and chats weren’t the same. 

With most of the passengers already boarded, you and Bucky made it to your seats fairly quickly and sat down with a laugh when Bucky had to squish his body into yours to let an elderly lady through. Your seat was in the middle, a man around your age on the window side, while Bucky was in the seat close to the aisle. It seemed to be a fine seating arrangement, but then the man had started talking to you while Bucky brought out a book to read. It was innocent at first, just asking about your holiday plans and the flight back, until he started asking you if someone was waiting for you at home. 

Bucky had all but growled and scowled at the man, leaning his head in and whispering, “Switch seats with me, doll.” You obliged, never having seen his possessive side back at home. You never really ventured out of your band of misfits, sticking to your friends during an outing. Men had asked you out in front of Bucky before, but then you hadn’t been his and he hadn’t been yours. 

Settling into Bucky’s seat, you noticed two things; one, his seat was warm and two, he was too big for the seat in the middle. He adjusted himself to sit slightly sideways, blocking the man’s view of you completely. You leaned against his shoulder and read the book he was reading, recognizing the title. You bit your tongue for a few minutes, letting Bucky think that you accepted his behaviour without teasing, before proving him wrong. 

“You’re so cute when you're jealous.”

———

Winifred Barnes greeted you as if you had been in her life since Bucky had been. A warm embrace and kiss to your cheek, she cupped your cheeks in her hands with a soft smile on her face. She then swatted Bucky’s arm with the oven mitt she was holding, scolding him for taking so long to get his act together and calling them. Bucky merely smiled painfully as she continued to ramble, slowly realising she hadn’t even hugged him yet. Then she was crying into his shoulder, patting his hair and smoothing a hand down his back with hushed murmurs too low for you to hear. 

George Barnes had stood back with glazed eyes, lips pressed into a thin line before extending a hand to you to shake. His eyes were the same shade of blue as Bucky and his hair, even though lined with grey, was the same as the dark locks of Bucky. You shook it with a genuine smile on your face, a stray tear slipping down your cheek as George took his wife’s spot and wrapped his arms around Bucky. Bucky seemed to stiffen when George patted his back and then relaxed when George whispered something in his ear. 

Rebecca came running down the stairs, earphones dangling from her phone where they were plugged with her hands trying their best to grasp them. She looked similar to Bucky with the same piercing blue eyes and dimples on her cheeks when she smiled. Her features were feminine and softer, but she looked like Bucky. They both had gained more of their father than mother. She wrapped you in a hug, squeezing tightly and whispering that she had some things to tell you. Her mood was better than last night and you wondered if Bruce had called her back. 

“You!” She pointed at Bucky, voice increasing louder than you had expected. “You little shit! You left me on read that day and your asshole friend told me nothing! Nothing! I had to find out you moved to New York to join the fucking army from Steve’s girlfriend. Steve, oh my, when I get my hands on him, I’m gonna strangle the shit out of him! Asshole.” 

Bucky grinned and said, “Missed you too, Becs.” Rebecca softened and pulled him into a hug, squeezing a bit more tighter and making him groan. 

“You deserve a lot worse than that, dumbass.”

Stupid,” Bucky muttered under his breath, earning a swat to the head from Rebecca. He glared at her and she stuck her tongue out at him. 

“Can’t do anything about it,” she taunted, spinning on her heels and sauntering further into the house. “I’m ma and pa’s favourite.”

“She might be my favourite Barnes,” you teased Bucky with a wink as he stepped up onto the first step when his parents had gestured for Bucky to take the suitcases upstairs to his childhood bedroom. Winifred waved a hand, gesturing for you to follow her, seemingly not hearing what you had said. 

“Favourite Barnes, my ass,” he muttered under his breath, heaving up a suitcase without groaning and sending a glare towards where Rebecca was now settled beside you on the three-seater. You heard him with the small two-story brownstone open floor plan. 

You found the house nice and warm, kind of like the embrace Winifred had wrapped you in. The more you looked around the place, the more you realized that she was probably the one who decorated the place. The vintage velvet couches were a dark red colour that fit perfectly in the light brown colour the living room was painted in. The dining room was a sage green colour with a lighter shade creating a mural of leaves. The kitchen was a pale blue colour with a hint of grey in it. The fireplace was on, lighting the wooden floor in shades of yellow and oranges. 

Your eyes landed on a picture of Bucky and Rebecca in the snow with a snowman built between them. It was hung beside the TV, a place where anyone in the house could see it. Neither of them were looking at the camera, but at each other and that just made it more adorable. Bucky’s wide grin showed a missing tooth at the top, one arm thrown around the snowman while the other jutted out to the side. Rebecca, who was probably around four or five, was only managing a smile, caught looking at her brother from the corner of her eyes. 

“You guys are adorable,” you cooed, eyes flickering to Rebecca when you heard her huff in annoyance. 

“I’m gonna burn that thing,” she muttered under her breath, watching Bucky descend the stairs and catch your line of sight. He sighed in annoyance, a similar reaction to what Rebecca had. 

“If you do that,” you started, pausing when Bucky flopped down beside you and threw his arm over the couch behind you, “I might cry.”

“Fuck,” Bucky hissed, throwing his head back and screwing his face up like he was in pain. “Don’t burn that picture, Becs.” You wanted to laugh at the thought of your tears—just the thought of your tears—causing him so much pain. You wanted to giggle or tease him, maybe fake some tears right then, but you understood what he felt to a limit. While you would be hurt if he was crying, you weren’t sure if you would cry with him. But, knowing your Bucky, he would break if you cried. You had seen it in an argument you two had about eight months ago. 

“Shit, he’s whipped. You gotta tell me how you did that.”

December 29th

Mornings with the Barnes were different from mornings with the Y/Ss, that much was obvious. The usual clangs of pots and pans were missing, replaced with hushed voices and the smell of cinnamon, coffee, and bacon strong in the air. The curtains were closed from Winifred’s orders, telling you both to get as much sleep as you needed, so no light invaded the room. Your bodies were tangled up more than usual with the smaller bed frame. None of you had batted an eye when you realized that the double-sized bed was what you two were sharing for two nights. 

Snuggling further into Bucky’s chest and tugging the blanket up to your nose, you yawned and blinked awake. The smell of coffee had always seemed to wake you up and the smell of cinnamon was making your stomach growl lowly. Sneaking a glance up at Bucky, you snuck out of bed and made your way into the bathroom. When you came out, Bucky was still asleep, mouth slightly parted with his soft snores filling the room. 

He ought to be tired after all the heavy lifting he did yesterday and the day before. After dropping your suitcases to his bedroom and getting a five minute break on the couch with you and Rebecca, he had been whisked away by George to shovel the driveway. Bucky assured you and Rebecca that he didn’t need help and was looking for a way to keep exercising over the holidays anyway. The snow had mixed with rain so it was heavier than usual and you could tell Bucky’s arms were going to be sore the next day.

He had started wincing last night when he laid on his side. He still held you close, wrapping his arms around your middle and yanking you to lay on his chest for the first few minutes. Then you had slid off, placing a kiss on his jaw and feeling his body relax as he fell into a slumber. 

You tiptoed downstairs before making your presence known by the creak in the last step. Winifred and George looked up from their plates and smiled at you. 

“Good morning,” they both chimed, Winifred moving to get up. 

“Good morning,” you repeated back, sitting down at the breakfast table when Winifred motioned for you to do so. You wanted to argue but you had learned Winifred Barnes did not want anyone else in her kitchen yesterday. She placed a plate of toast, eggs, and bacon in front of you and let you dig in before sitting down, satisfied with your first bite. Rebecca trudged down the stairs a few minutes later, eyes trained on her phone with a big smile on her face.

She and Bruce had had a long talk and Bruce finally accepted the fact that Rebecca was fine without kids for now. When they did want to have kids, and if they stayed together for that long—she thought they would—they could always adopt. 

Once she reached the table, she flopped down onto the chair with routine and waited for her mom to set up her plate. She put away her phone and started chatting with you as you both ate. George was long gone into his study, the only room on the main floor that had doors and walls of its own, when Bucky came down. His eyes darted to you, a soft glare on his face and a pout on his lips. 

“You left me alone.”

December 30th

Bucky shook his head at you when you grunted trying to pick up your suitcase. He had been telling you for the last few hours that he was going to load them into the pickup truck Steve brought over last night with Natasha. Steve had gotten quite the welcome; a warm hug from both his parents and then Rebecca attempting to swing her foot into his face. Natasha merely greeted Bucky’s parents and grabbed you and Rebecca, pulling you two away from the group and gossiping about whatever. 

He was lucky for that. It had given him the time to sneak his parents and Steve away into the study for a bit without you noticing. 

“Doll,” Bucky said, hands on his hips and an adoring smile on his lips. You huffed out a breath of annoyance and let go of the suitcase handle to push your hair back. “Me and Steve’ll put this shit away.” 

“Why haven’t you then?” You retorted, a frustrated tone coming into hearing. He furrowed his eyebrows and dropped his stance to something more confused. You rarely snapped at him without provoking or a really good reason to. His mind wandered off to yesterday, trying to remember if he had pissed you off somehow or if anyone else had something to you. His mind came up blank. 

“You okay, sweetheart?” He asked timidly and you seemed to sag at his voice. You blew out a breath and then inhaled deeply, repeating the process a few times. 

“I’m okay,” you replied, lips trying to curl at the sides but failing miserably when your bottom lip trembled. He caught the action and was wrapping his arms around you tight the next second. You wrapped your arms around his middle. He felt his shirt wet and his heart squeezed itself in pain. 

“Hey, sweetheart. Don’t cry, Y/N. I might cry too, and we know that’s gonna be a mess.” His knees were starting to feel weak and his eyes were glazing over, trying to blink away the tears. Your watery chuckle had his heart loosening a little. When you looked up at him with your teary eyes and sad smile, he let out a shaky sigh. “There’s my girl.”

“I’m okay,” you repeated, nodding your head once to affirm it. “I’m just a bit emotional since we’re heading home now.”

“Well, I know a little white furball who’s probably waiting for her mama to come back home. I know she misses you loads.”

You snorted and said, “Yeah, right.”

“I’m serious, doll. That cat loves you.”

“She’s absolutely smitten with you, Bucky Barnes.”

“The cat?”

“Both of us.” 

[ghostxrose]

𝑶𝒇 𝑴𝒐𝒏𝒔𝒕𝒆𝒓𝒔 𝒂𝒏𝒅 𝑴𝒆𝒏 | 𝑩𝒂𝒌𝒖𝒈𝒐 𝑲𝒂𝒕𝒔𝒖𝒌𝒊 𝒙 𝑶𝑪

Part One | Part Two | Part Three | Part Four | Part Five | Part Six | Part Seven |

Tags/Warnings ~ Fem!OC, angst, hurt/comfort, eventual fluff, enemies to friends to lovers, slow burn, potentially triggering content, universe-typical violence, Enji Todoroki (yes, that is a warning, he's trash), character death, suicidal ideation, (more tags to be added as story develops <3)

Note ~ Hey, Lovelies! Here's chapter three and four will be up right after I post this one! My husband and I will be going out of town for a bit, so yall get a double-update treat! Enjoy, Lovelies! <3

“Toya, are you sure it’s okay for us to be doing this..? Dad will kill us if he finds us out here without him or Mom..” Natsuo quietly asks, his body language screaming how nervous he is as they all walk along.

Toya lets out an annoyed huff, waving a dismissive hand in the air, “If you’re going to be such a scared little baby, then you can go back to the house.” He says without turning around to face his younger brother.

“We’ll be fine, Nats. We’ll only be down at the beach for a bit; play in some waves, make sandcastles, admire the stars or whatever, then we’ll head back.” Azusa tells Natsuo, reassuringly wrapping an arm over his shoulders.

“Yeah, Nats! C’mon, this is going to be so fun! It’s a full moon tonight, so we have plenty of light to play wave tag in!” Fuyumi exclaims with a wide smile as she skips across the sand.

With another huff, this time one of slight guilt for being snappish, Toya turns around to face his three siblings, “Exactly what they said, Squirt. Look, I just want to make the most of this vacation. You know that Dad doesn’t get a lot of leave days, so who knows when we’ll be back and dammit a night swim at the beach is something everyone should experience! Even you brats!” He lightheartedly jabs with a playful smile as he continues to walk backward on the beach.

“Hey-”

“-m not a brat-”

“Toyaaaa-”

Azusa, Natsuo, and Fuyumi all playfully whine out with giggles and smiles on their faces as they all charge their older brother. A game of tag ensues; laughs echo in the air, sand and water being flung at one another, and pure joy exudes from each of the Todoroki siblings.

A yelp escapes Azusa’s mouth when she feels Toya squish a fat handful of sand into the top of her head, ensuring that grains of sand bury themselves in her hair.

“Oh my god, Toya! You are so dea-”

BEEP! BEEP! BEEP!

“Attention Rangers, report to the Mess Hall for breakfast, then report to Bay 3 at 0600 immediately following breakfast for your co-pilot and Jaeger assignments. Attention Rangers, report-”

Azusa groans at the AI voice grating at her ears and she blindly reaches a hand out to shut off the alarm and the accompanying repetitive message. As she pulls herself from her bed, she tries to cling to the faint feeling of happiness she gained from the memory she relived in her sleep. She makes her way to her dresser, pausing before opening up the sock drawer to pick up a photo of her late brother.

“Today is the day I officially become a pilot, Toya.. I’ll even get to pilot your old Jaeger. D-don’t worry, Toya, I’ll m-make sure t-to take care of her f-for you.” Azusa whispers to the photo, barely getting her promise out past the painful lump in her throat. She gently sets the photo back down on the dresser and takes a few deep breaths then proceeds to get ready for the day.

Once dressed and as mentally ready as she can be, Azusa leaves her room and heads for the Mess Hall. Fuyumi never showed up to accompany her, which happens from time to time especially when Rangers are woken up earlier than usual. A small and quiet voice whispers how much it wants to be in bed still in the back of Azusa’s mind as the elevator descends. She lets out a tired sigh as she steps off of the elevator when it stops but quickly rights herself out as she enters the Mess Hall.

Azusa heads for the food line when she’s roughly shoulder-checked by somebody quickly moving past her. “Watch it,” she hisses out just before she registers the tall, broad, and blonde-haired being cutting in front of her. Sticking up his middle finger, Bakugo turns to shoot Azusa an arrogant smirk before turning back toward the stack of trays at the start of the food line. Azusa’s jaw clenches, her blood immediately boiling, but before she can spit any venom at Bakugo, Kendo and Tetsutetsu come up to her.

“Asshole,” Kendo says harshly under her breath as she casts a glare at the back of Bakugo’s head.

“I feel sorry for whoever his co-pilot ends up being,” Tetsutetsu adds as the three of them grab their trays and join the food line.

“Hopefully whoever it is can help him pull his head out of his ass.” Azusa quips quietly, causing her two friends to snicker as all three of them watch Bakugo’s knuckles go white from how hard he grips his tray.

Breakfast goes by without any more spats, surprisingly enough to Azusa. She had to hide it in the moment but she was genuinely shocked that Bakugo hadn’t attempted to fight the trio when they were shit-talking him literally right behind his back. All she had gotten for her comment was an ugly, snarl-twisted glare shot at her before he stomped off to “his” table.

All too soon, Rangers across the entire Mess Hall began standing to clear their places and head for the Shatterdome. An air of nervousness and excitement settles amongst the collective of newly graduated Rangers as they all gather around the elevators. Azusa blankets her nerves with perpetual stoicism and forced calm. She observes that Kendo has chosen to take occasional deep breaths while Tetsutetsu finds that yammering on endlessly about random crap soothes his nerves. It’s only when the group of new Rangers are all standing at attention at the mouth of Bay 3 with Marshal Todoroki and Marshal Aizawa in front of them that a suffocating silence ensue.

Marshal Todoroki’s judgmental gaze sweeps over the group as Marshal Aizawa’s stern gaze serves as a silent reminder to take this seriously. Marshal Todoroki clears his throat, making everyone tighten up their positions.

“At ease, Rangers.” Marshal Todoroki finally says after a couple of moments of tense silence. “Before we announce the co-pilot pairings and Jaeger assignments, I wanted to remind you all that this is not a game. This is not your childhood dream nor is it your chance at 15 minutes of fame. This is war. You are Rangers now, fighting for the sake of saving humanity.” Marshal Todoroki firmly states, his tone deadly serious.

“This is reality and in this reality, in this war, you are all putting your lives on the line. You may die. Your co-pilots may die. Your friends may die. But with those facts of this hellish reality looming over our heads, I thank you for your service and hope that you all live to see the day we win this war.” Marshal Todoroki ends his speech, both he and Marshal Aizawa straightening up and saluting.

The group of Rangers, collectively torn between shitting their pants from fear and keeping their cool, straightens up and salutes back. Azusa, while fully grasping the seriousness of the situation, inwardly cringes a bit at the lack of encouragement from her father. ‘Did I really expect him to be any sort of encouraging, though?’ She ponders bitterly as she and the rest of the group relax their positions.

“Onto announcing the co-pilot pairings and Jaeger assignments,” Marshal Aizawa says, drawing every pair of anticipation-filled eyes on him.

As Marshal Aizawa read off the names of pairs of co-pilots and their assigned Jaegers, Azusa’s stomach began to churn a bit. As much as she tried to will away the feelings of nervousness and slight dread, the roiling feeling refused to go. Occasionally her eyes connected with those of her father’s, making matching his steely and stoic gaze the only easy thing about this whole event.

“Rangers Kirishima and Tetsutetsu, you both will be the pilots of the Jaeger; Steel Riot.” Marshal Aizawa announces, then sends a sharp glare at the two as they move to high-five and cheer, stopping them in their tracks.

“Rangers Hado and Kendo, you both will be piloting the Jaeger; Battle Fist.” Marshal Aizawa continues, letting the smiles the girls shoot each other slide despite the air of professionalism.

“Rangers Bakugo and Todoroki, both of you will be piloting the Jaeger; Bravo Inferno.” Marshal Aizawa says, casting a slightly wary glance between Azusa and Bakugo.

As soon as she had heard Bakugo’s name in the same sentence as hers, every single other word out of the man’s mouth became muffled by static. Her stomach now burns with a nasty mix of anger, dread, and loathing. She hears a curse-filled outburst that undoubtedly comes from Bakugo, but she is too focused on glaring at her father to acknowledge the brash blonde.

Marshal Todoroki pointedly avoids meeting Azusa’s eyes, his stoic gaze shifting over the other Rangers. Azusa clenches her jaw, her teeth grinding together as she continues to glare, half registering the stern words from Marshal Aizawa’s reprimand toward Bakugo. She can’t understand why her father or Marshal Aizawa thought that pairing her with Bakugo would be a good idea.

‘There is absolutely no way we will be able to work together, let alone Drift smoothly! This doesn’t make any fucking sense! He’s a stubborn asshole who will get us both killed if we’re even able to Drift successfully! Son of a fucking bitch-’ Azusa seethes as she half listens to Marshal Aizawa continue with assignments. Eventually, the assignment announcements come to an end and the group of Rangers are being led to Loccent’s command center while the first Jaeger and its pilots are being prepped for their first test run.

Azusa and the other newly graduated Rangers watch as team after team take their turns with their Jaegers, going through their first Drifts. Her peers cheer and congratulate each other with every successful display. Azusa offers her own words of praise when Tetsu and Kendo come back from each of their own successful Drift sequences with their co-pilots. Finally, the moment that she has been dreading comes when Marshal Aizawa tells her and Bakugo to go suit up.

The tense and rage-filled air between Azusa and Bakugo could be cut with a knife as the two don’t utter a word, let alone spare a glance at each other while techs help them suit up. The two enter the Conn-Pod of Bravo Inferno, Bakugo stomping his way over to the right-side pilot harness without even asking what side Azusa would prefer. As much as she would have preferred piloting from the right, she lets it go with an annoyed roll of her eyes.

Mechanisms lock Azusa into place when she steps into the foot-holds and places her back against the harness. The soft hissing and clicks coming from her right tell her that Bakugo hasn’t decided to leave the Conn-Pod in an anger-filled rage. Azusa takes a deep breath, using the cool oxygen being pumped into her helmet as an aid to shove down her growing dread.

“Alright, Rangers, let yourselves flow through the Drift. Remember Random Access Brain Impulse Triggers, or RABIT, don’t chase it and don’t fight it. Just like in your simulations, do not get stuck in the memories. Are you ready?” Marshal Aizawa’s voice coaches through the Comms, his voice firm but holding the slightest amount of hesitance.

“Whatever! Let’s just get this over with!” Bakugo snarls out, smothering her confirmation of readiness. Marshal Aizawa doesn’t even bother reprimanding him, just lets out a tired sigh before getting off of the Comms.

Azusa straightens up and tries to force the tension from her body as the AI voice speaking through the Comms counts down the seconds til neural handshake. She leans back a bit and closes her eyes, the final seconds ticking down. A gasp is ripped from her mouth and her body jerks as her consciousness is sucked into a flurry of memories, both hers and Bakugo’s.

Flashes of her childhood play before her eyes, good moments blurring together into bad. She sees herself running around and laughing as she chases her siblings. Watches as her past self cheers and gloats over beating Toya in a video game. Feels it when memories of her father angrily shouting at her and her siblings when they did something wrong or embarrassed him in some way fly by. Unaware of her body’s labored breathing, new memories flash across her mind’s eye, memories that are new to her but not to Bakugo.

Azusa watches as a younger version of the blonde marches across a playground seemingly commanding those that follow him. Another memory bleeds through and she sees an older, female version of Bakugo cleaning his younger version’s knee. The woman, his mother Azusa assumes, says something that makes Bakugo’s younger self reluctantly giggle before that memory fades into another. This time, Azusa sees a teenage Bakugo gripping tightly onto a family photo. His face is twisted into anger and anguish, tears sliding down his cheeks and his jaw clenched. Everything fades out completely and with another gasp, Azusa is dropped back into reality, feelings and thoughts that aren’t hers invading her brain.

“Right hemisphere calibrating,” the AI voice from before guides, as Azusa and Bakugo lift their right hands up in sync.

“Left hemisphere calibrating,” the AI continues, Bakugo and Azusa raising their left hands up in sync.

“Holy shit,” Bakugo breathes out over the Comms and Azusa can feel his awe as much as she can feel her own.

The pair’s thoughts fall into sync seamlessly as they move to show off a bit. Moving together fluidly the two raise their fists and bend their knees, getting themselves and the massive machine they now control into a fighting position. Feeding off of the impressed looks and cheers from onlookers, they quickly move into a different stance. Their brains and bodies following the same train of thought, they straighten up and bring one fisted hand to the palm of their opened one. Bakugo’s overwhelmingly confident and flashy ego reminds Azusa of Toya, a bit of sadness flashing through her mind when-

“Where the fuck is he?! Where is Toya?! He can’t be dead! Please, no no no-”

Flinching at the painful drop back into reality, Azusa groans and tries to make out what the voices she’s hearing are saying, “-roki and Ranger Bakugo, you are both out of alignment! Please try to re-stabilize yourselves!” Iida’s slightly panicked voice rings through Azusa’s ears.

“I-I’m sorry, I’m good now-” Azusa tries to say, but she is cut off by Marshal Aizawa getting on the Comms.

“You’re stabilizing, Todoroki, but Bakugo is still way out of it! Bring him back, now!” Marshal Aizawa commands with urgency.

“Dammit- Bakugo, listen to me! Snap out of it! It’s just a memory, you have to come back to reality!” Azusa shouts across the three-foot gap between her and Bakugo.

Unfortunately, nothing seems to be getting through to the blonde as he stands in place, stock still. His eyes have a faraway look in them, his face fearful and his hands clenched into fists at his sides. But Azusa keeps trying to get to him, closing her eyes and sinking into her mind to try to find where his went.

When she opens her eyes again it’s raining and she’s standing among the rubble remains of a building. Her gaze sweeps the area, not finding her co-pilot anywhere but instead catching on the form of his younger self. This version of Bakugo appears to be the same teenage version from the earlier memory. Once again, she looks around at all of the broken pieces of the building and pieces together that it used to be an apartment complex.

She looks back at teenage Bakugo when she hears him cough and groan as he moves to sit up from where he is lying. In the distance, she can hear helicopters and there’s a slight rumble from the ground beneath her, but all she can focus on is the boy in front of her. Teenage Bakugo stands up slowly with a dazed and pained look on his face as he grabs at his bleeding torso. More blood runs down the side of his face from his hairline and overall he doesn’t look too good.

Azusa watches as he looks around, clarity coming back to him as concern floods his features. He stumbles forward, desperately searching for something among the rubble surrounding them.

“Ma? Pops?” He calls out, his raspy and cracking voice echoing throughout the destroyed landscape. A few tears escape his eyes and he furiously wipes them away before continuing his search for his parents. A few feet away from where he had woken up, Bakugo stops cold in his tracks.

“N-no,” he brokenly whispers out, looking down at a pile of broken concrete slabs.

Azusa slowly walks up behind him, morbid curiosity getting the better of her, admittedly. A horrified gasp leaves her mouth as her stomach lurches at the sight of a hand sticking out from beneath the rubble. Slender fingers lay slightly crumpled and limp on the ground, a silver wedding band coated in dust sitting snugly on the ring finger. Acid burns at the back of Azusa’s throat when she recognizes the small ruby adorning the ring.

“No, no, no! Damn it!” Bakugo’s gut-wrenching shouting breaks Azusa’s attention away from her horrible realization.

Turning to her left, Azusa sees teenage Bakugo on his knees next to a body half-covered by rubble. Part of a re-bar sticks out of the side of the body’s chest and her nausea hits full force, once more, as Azusa walks over to Bakugo. When she reaches him, his face is buried in his hands as he sobs and his shoulders shake violently. Azusa looks down at the body before them and with a broken heart she realizes that it’s the man from the family photo from the other memory; Bakugo’s father.

Lost within the shared feelings of loss, grief, and pain, neither she nor Bakugo registers the sound of emergency personnel making their arrival. It’s only when a paramedic is crouched down in front of Bakugo do either of them briefly break from their grief. Bakugo, expressionless and silent, gets ushered to an ambulance with a dust-covered picture frame in his hands, the glass of it shattered and the whole thing is overall broken.

Teenage Bakugo passing out in the back of that ambulance is what snaps them back to reality, both of their bodies giving out on them. Alarms are blaring throughout the Conn-Pod and voices shout at them through the Comms. Looking out of the window of the Conn-Pod, Azusa watches the arms of the Jaeger slowly fall to its sides. As the glow of them fades out, she realizes that one of the weapons had been engaged during the traumatic flashback and a dulled shiver runs down her spine.

Ignoring the continued shouting from whoever is on the Comms, Azusa removes her helmet and releases herself from her harness. She rushes over to Bakugo, hands out ready to steady the man as he stumbles from his harness’s release. He rights himself, though, and shakes the look of sadness from his face to replace it with a harsh glare. He rips his helmet off as he steps away from Azusa.

“Get the fuck away from me.” He seethes out before running a hand over his face to wipe away the remaining tears. Shoving past her with little care, Bakugo storms his way out of the Conn-Pod leaving Azusa alone to deal with the torrent of emotions flooding her brain.

Note ~ Let me know if there are any tags I should add! I love and appreciate every single one of you, Lovelies! <3

Tag List ~ @tomiokasecretlover

Divider Credit ~ @animatedglittergraphics-n-more

[ultrastarseeker]

RANDOM FANFIC IDEA(that anyone can use if they want, just credit me.)

AU: MK dies from over using his power but Wukong manages to trap his soul into a jar. Now the crew has to figure out how to get MK back, since they want to keep him in their lives. With the help of Nezha, they figured out there’s a potion to rebirth MK but they need a host to get pregnant for it.

Now I’ve created four routes for this AU, I might make more if I want to, but anyways the routes are:

Lotus baby: Nezha takes the potion and pours it into a Lotus seed, he explains that no one needs to actually get pregnant, they just need a host. So Nezha takes care of the Lotus seed until it blooms and reveals a baby monkey MK with faded pink hair. Nezha becomes official brothers with baby MK who now has Flower powers and Monkey king powers.

(TW: Mention of miscarriage)

Dragon egg: Mei takes the potion and explained that her mother recently had an (unfortunate) unfertilized dragon egg that they could put the potion in. So they take the potion to Mei’s parents and at first they refuse but then Mei’s mother still wanted another baby, so she agreed and put the potion into the egg which fertilized it. Mei’s family takes care of the egg for the next year and nine months and then BOOM, Mixed dragon-monkey toddler MK was born and then raised by Mei’s parents.(btw MK is a toddler because he grew in the egg since dragon hatch from eggs and live a really long time.)

(This is the part where Mpreg is mentioned, so if you’re uncomfortable with that then skip these two routes, Please.)

The freenoodles piglet: Tang decided to be the host since He and Pigsy raised MK, and drank the potion. Pigsy (with the help of the others), help Tang with troubles and joys of pregnancy. When Tang gives birth to Our pride and joy, MK, he now only has a monkey tail and claws while the rest of his body is human. Tang and Pigsy raise MK again but now with the powers edition. :)

The Shadowpeach infant: Wukong begs Pigsy and Tang to let him give birth to MK, since he felt that MK and he developed a Father and child bond and the fact that he feels guilty that MK died from his mistakes. Pigsy and Tang reluctantly agreed(Pigsy: Damn those baby monkey eyes.), and Wukong drinks the potion. Now after everyone talked about it, Wukong was going to stay in Flower Fruit Mountain for the pregnancy since it’s safer but there was a problem, who would help Wukong during his second and third trimester? Suddenly A emo monkey appears! Macaque volunteered since he knows how demon monkeys work since he is one, he can easily tell the others when MK is being born with shadow clones, he has a father-son relationship with MK too, and he already lived on the mountain anyways. (Wukong raised an eyebrow at that but anyways) Wukong agreed and the two of them went to FFM. During this pregnancy, They worked out more of their communication issues and got back together(DBK: for the fifth time in a row!), The Demon Bull Family visited(even though we never got to see how Wukong and the demon family worked it out!), Pigsy and Tang fuss over Wukong like a lot. And then MK is born like a regular monkey demon with Wukong’s powers.

Now here are some extras you can put into the story routes!

Redson having a crisis since she had a crush on MK but getting over it as they realized that his MK won’t be coming back and he should embrace this new MK. (This is for Spicynoodles fans if you want angst for Redson. Also if you want Redson could develop a crush on Mei instead if you’re also a Dragonfruit fan.)

Wukong, Pigsy, Tang and or Macaque fussing over MK’s host like the dads they are. This will annoy the caretakers and they’ll tell them that they need to realize that MK is being taken care and that they(the caretakers) need a break from their fussiness! The MK dads (reluctantly) agree and take a step back. (Wukong and Macaque ignores this and use bug transformations to spy on MK’s host without the Caretakers noticing, expect for Nezha. Don’t worry Nezha scolds them for being clingy.)

Crazy baby MK shenanigans(I gave y’all a lot of potential for this. >:3 )

This is a goofy idea that I randomly made, so just have fun with it. I might make it myself once I’m done with my other fanfics.

[jerzwriter]

What's Forever For Universe Things Unsaid Part 3/3

This fic is part of a new Tobias & Casey AU, What's Forever For? (Learn more about it here.) For those who follow my T/C HC, their background is a little different here. A headcanon will be posted in the next few days. 😊

Book:                   Open Heart (Post Series-Alternate Universe)

Pairing:                Tobias Carrick x F!MC (Casey)

Rating:                 Teen

Category:            Angst/Short-Series/AU

Warnings: Divorce/mention of miscarriage

Series Summary: Three days. That's all that stands between Tobias and Casey Carrick and the end of their marriage. The house is sold, they've said goodbye, and now they just have to wait to make it official. But what happens if one (or both) have second thoughts?

Chapter Summary: Tobias is heading to Casey's parent's house to pick up their son, Kyle. Both of them have so much they want to say, but insecurity, fear, and other factors stand in their way. Can they overcome the obstacles? Or will this be the end?

Words: 2.5 k

A/N: Participating in @choicesflashfics, I was ambitious and used prompts #1 and #2 this week! Also participating in @choicesmonthlychallenge prompt Love (painful love, but love.) I wanted to do one more quick edit - but I won't have time to do so for a while, so I'm going to be all Elsa and let it go. (Then I'll edit on Saturday and be mad at myself... you understand lol) WFF? Universe Info & Masterlist Tobias & Casey Masterlist All Works Masterlist

Monday evening.

The sun still shone so brightly that Casey didn’t need a light on as she stared at her reflection in the mirror of her childhood bedroom. Something to be grateful for… winter's darkness was finally lifting. She would be sure to include that on her gratitude list before going to sleep tonight. Well, attempting to sleep. It was a new habit she had recently adopted, desperate to find any bit of joy to carry her through.

If the mirror could talk, it would reassure her she was beautiful and that the outfit she was inspecting was as lovely as the dozen that had come before. But Casey remained unconvinced. A quick glance around the room, and suddenly, she was back in high school, every ounce of self-confidence, gone.

But that insecure teenager didn’t exist anymore. She had been replaced by an accomplished physician, one of the brightest of her generation… admired, respected, and renowned. Until recently, she had it all. One half of the dynamic duo… the Doctors Carrick: medical marvels by day, loving… excessively so… couple by night. They did it all with aplomb and looked damn good as they did. When baby Kyle came along, the picture was complete. Everything was perfect. Right? So how’d she end up here?

She pulled a pink sweatshirt over her head and tossed it on the growing pile of rejects scattered on the floor. Apparently that insecure teenager had never been too far away after all.

She had already decided to wear her old baby blue jeans that fit like a second skin. Comfortable and worn, they were like an old friend, and she needed that more than anything. Sure, they looked great on her, and there was a time when he couldn’t keep his hands off her when she wore them, but Casey pushed that out of her mind. That wasn’t why she chose them, she insisted. It had nothing to do with that at all.

A soft cream-colored cardigan over a lacy camisole was the next contender. She twisted around, studying her reflection… No. It was too much. She couldn’t look like she was trying; she couldn’t even bring herself to admit that she was. This could easily turn into a nearly wordless handoff of their son. Parenting agreements, custody arrangements… all part of her new world. Tobias would likely see her for all of five minutes without a care about how she looked or what she wore. But… if he noticed… she couldn’t have him thinking she was primping for the past hour, even if it were true. 

A deep sigh escaped her. She didn’t know if she was brave enough to keep her promise to Sienna. Her confidence was stronger when telling him the truth was an abstract idea and a full day away. Now that the moment approached, courage seemed to escape her.

I love you, Tobias. I never stopped. I think we rushed into this, and if we try a little harder, I know we can make our marriage, our family work. I love you, and I don’t want to live without you by my side. Do you still love me? Do you want me, too?

It was easy when she practiced it a thousand times in her head. Ashe envisioned a beautiful rom-com ending for a love she knew would last forever – together or not. But as the moment approached, it was a past conversation that kept creeping into her mind.

“I can’t do this anymore, Casey. I’ve tried, we’ve tried… we always end up back here. This isn’t what we got married for. We have to accept… I know it’s hard, but… but… We’re not going to make it. Our marriage, it’s over. I have nothing else left to give.”

She survived hearing those words once, just barely; but she was unsure if she had the wherewithal to do it again. The numbing acceptance that defined her new reality was temporarily interrupted by a vision of a happy ending. But what if he said no? Could she remove the bandage and expose the wound once more? She wasn't sure she could.

The sound of voices near the front porch pulled her from her thoughts. 

“Shit!” she muttered, pulling the pink sweatshirt back over her head. It would have to do. She glanced at the clock, he was twenty minutes early, and she was unprepared. Already, things were not going as planned.

~~~~~

His hands were still white knuckling the steering wheel, even though he had put the car into park over five minutes before. He glanced at his watch; it was early. He didn’t want to look desperate… or inconsiderate… for all he knew, he could be the last person she wanted to see. For a man who had spent most of his life with assured confidence frequently bordering on cocky, these feelings still left him lost. Doubt, insecurity, confusion, regret… they weren’t in his vocabulary before. He learned that he was infallibly human, and he didn’t like it one bit.

Taking one last look in the mirror, he jumped out of the car before he lost his nerve. His feet were carrying him down the narrow concrete path that led to Casey’s parent’s home. He had been lucky enough to avoid his parents-in-law on previous handoffs. He told himself it would be better when he and Casey settled into their new places. Then he remembered that wasn’t what he wanted at all. It would be better if….

“Tobias,” Rose called out, doing her best to be polite.

His luck had to run out sooner or later, he turned to her with a nervous smile.

“Hey,” he said, not knowing what to call her anymore. The comfortable, Ma, he had used for the past decade sure didn’t seem to fit anymore. “It’s been a while.”

“Mmm. Just another thing we’ll have to get used to. You’re early,” she observed. “Kyle’s out getting ice cream with David. They should be back soon.”

Her arms crossed in front of her chest, and she did not offer to invite him inside. She knew the day would come when she’d have to be more cordial, for Kyle’s sake, but that day was not today.

“OK… I uh… was wondering if…” he stumbled. “You know what, I’ll just wait in the car.”

But before he could walk away, the front door crashed open, and like a vision, Casey appeared. For a moment, she was sixteen again. The boy her parents deemed unsuitable was attempting to make a call, and Rose was in momma-bear mode sending him away. But she wasn’t sixteen anymore, and the decision was hers to make.

“Hi,” Tobias smiled sheepishly. “I’m sorry I’m early. I was just going to wait in…”

“No…” she halted. “Mom, I need to talk to Tobias alone. Would you give us some time?”

“You’re of age,” Rose shrugged. “I’ll be in the garden if you need me.”

Tobias’s cheeks turned red and he was uncertain if it stemmed from anger or shame. Their marriage was ending, but did Rose seriously think he’d do Casey any harm? But then again, how could he blame her? For he already had.

The estranged couple settled into the living room, Casey offered to get him a drink. He politely declined. Accepting her hospitality just didn’t seem fair. He sat perched on one end of the couch as Casey cautiously took her place on the other.

“So,” he spoke softly, eyes fixed on his fidgeting hands, “you wanted to talk.”

“Uh, yeah,” Casey stammered. “I just… we haven’t really had the chance to talk since our last day at the house, and… well… it’s just two days away now.”

Perhaps he would have noticed the tears in her eyes if he were looking her way, but shame prevented him from doing so.

“Yeah,” he sighed ruefully. “Two days.”

“I… I was wondering… is there anything we need to… do… before then?”

“I don’t know,” he shrugged. “I suppose the lawyers would tell us if we did.”

“Yeah,” she scoffed. “The lawyers….”

Anxiety began to grip her and Casey turned her gaze away, fixing it on Tobias’s keys and phone tossed on the coffee table. Silence weighed heavy in the room, and the longer it hung, the more forming words felt impossible.

Tobias hadn’t intentionally let the silence linger; he was lost in thought weighing what option would be worse… returning to his mother’s and admitting he didn't tell Casey he loved her and didn’t want their marriage to end. Or telling Casey the truth and risking eviscerating rejection once more.

“Casey, I don’t want this. I love you, I’ve always loved you, and I always will. I know you think I just wasn’t meant to be married, and you know what… you’re one -hundred percent right. I never was. Until I met you. If there was ever anybody meant for me, it’s you. We gave up too easily, and ignoring our problems wouldn’t make them go away. I love you, I want you… please, please give us one more chance.”

“Tobias?”

Casey’s voice beckoned him back to the present.

“Yeah…” he startled, “I was just… thinking….”

“I was saying Kyle will be back any moment now, so… if there was anything we wanted to say… now would be the time.”

“Casey,” he started, “this all feels so, so….”

“Wrong,” she finished. “Look at us. We’re afraid to even speak to each other; this is never who we were.”

“It’s not,” he sighed. “We got so lost along the way.”  

“We did,” she choked back tears. “You were my best friend before you became much more…then you were my everything….” she bit her lip, heart and head still battling over what to say.

“I loved being your everything,” he smiled. “And I loved when you were mine… my everything. But we have Kyle, we’re still a family.”

“But what if we didn’t… have Kyle,” she interrupted. “Would you still want any part of me? Or would you let me go?”

“What… what do you mean?”

“If there was no Kyle, just us… would this be it? Would I never see you again?”  

“Oh, Casey,” he gasped, fighting a visceral reaction to take her in his arms. “I hate to think of a world where you aren’t a part of my life. But I’ve got to admit….” He stopped, afraid to continue, but Casey wasn’t letting him off.

“Admit what?”

“The only reason I might… be done… is because I don’t know how I’ll handle the pain of having you in my life, knowing you’re no longer mine. I guess… I have to, for Kyle. But, Jesus, I don’t want to.”  

“You… you don’t want to?” her heart raced at his words.

“No! No,” he said as a single tear rolled down his cheek. “That isn’t what I meant. A voice inside his head was screaming, tell her, but another yelled just as loudly, telling him he had no right.

Their minds both wandered… a montage of their lives flashed before their eyes. Good friends who had become lovers, so in love, they could barely breathe. A life he never imagined but welcomed with open arms. Her face at the altar and his as he carried her over the threshold of their new home. All the dreams, the plans… now gone. He kissed her forehead as she cradled their newborn son. Perfection. There was no way their life would ever be anything but light. Then came the exhaustion, the demands, the misunderstandings, and the fights… real life crept in on their fairy tale and refused to let go. The compromises that left both feeling like they lost, always followed by resentment. Casey lying in a hospital bed weeping, mourning a life that never had a chance to begin. The dark, dark days that followed, when the chasm only widened. They forgot who they were, forgot the promises they had made, and instead of turning to each other, they both turned away. Tension, anger, misunderstandings… they took control.

“You don’t trust me!”

“Why should I? You’re rarely here, and when you are, you're a million miles away. I know what it felt like to be wanted by you… and I don’t feel that anymore.”

“Life changes, Casey! But that doesn’t mean I don’t want you!”

“Really? So I’m the only one you want?”

“What? What’s that supposed to mean? Yes! You are… you... you don't believe me?”

“No. I don’t.”

“Then we have a real problem! Because if you don't even trust me, I don’t know what we have left.”

The bottom fell out, and it never came back. There was no reason for her not to trust him, but he never took the time to understand why she no longer did. He wasn’t avoiding her, but she never bothered to find out what he was. And now, in two days, they were getting the only solution they thought they had. Until now….

“Tobias,” Casey whispered. “I know this may sound crazy, but I was wondering….”

A loud ring interrupted her train of thought… life’s all about timing. She wasn’t snooping, but instinctively turned its way.

Miranda.

Casey fell back into the couch, visibly defeated. Tobias turned off his ringer and threw the phone in his pocket. He tried to pick up where they had left off, but the train had already derailed.

“You’re still friends?” Casey sniveled.

“Yes. Just friends. I never said we weren’t.”

“You have Kyle for the next four days. She's not going to be around him, is she?"

Tobias’s jaw clenched. “No, she's not. But one day she likely will be. Are you telling me Kyle ever around Bryce? He’s never around your friends?”

“That’s different.”

“How? How is it different, Casey?"

“Because Miranda hates me! She was all too willing to tell you how you'd be better off without me. God only knows what she put in your head and I won’t have her do it with my son.”

“She doesn’t hate you! And she never told me to leave you! No, she’s not your biggest fan, but, in fairness, you treated her like shit."

“I treated her like shit because she didn’t respect me. I was your wife, and she didn't know her goddamn place!"

With a shake of his head, Tobias jumped to his feet. "You know what... I didn't come here for this. We've spent countless hours fighting over Miranda, and I have no desire to do it again.”

"I couldn’t agree more. Besides,” she swallowed, "we’ll be divorced in two days. Your friends, and any other relationships you may have, will no longer be any of my concern.”

Tobias shook his head as he shifted on the balls of his feet. "You were going to say something before the phone rang… is there anything... do you want to….”

“No. It was nothing,” she replied. “It's just... this is hard. It's so hard.”

“It is,” he lamented, sadly reaching out to gently stroke her face. His heart felt warm when she didn't retreat.

“Life’s changing for us, Casey…in big ways, but I will always love you. I need for you to know that.”

“I… I do,” her voice quivered. “And I’ll always love you, too.”

“I think I’ll wait for Kyle outside. I’ll… I’ll have him call you tonight before he goes to bed."

“Please do,” Casey wept, no longer trying to contain her tears. “I wish… I wish things had turned out differently, Tobias. I really do.”

“Yeah," he chuckled sadly, so do I. But what did you say the day we moved out of the house? It was a beautiful dream.”

“Mmm-hmm,” she sniffled. “It was.”

Tobias reached over and took her hand in his, grasping it so tight, he never wanted to let go.

“You know, some nights, I have these dreams.... nothing specific, but in them, you and I are together. They’re back when things were still so good, when we were magic, and couldn't have imagined it would change. When I have them, I wake up it feels like you were there with me…you know? For a brief time, I get to have that again.”

“I know,” she wiped away her tears and tried so hard to be strong. “Sometimes, I have those dreams too… and it feels the same way.... but...."

"But?"

"I miss you SO much when I have them. It’s wonderful and hurts like hell at the same time.”

“I know," he sighed. "So, how about this? From now on, when either of us has one of those dreams, we'll remind ourselves the other may be having one, too. Maybe we couldn’t make things work in the real world, but in our dreams, that's something else. We’ll always be together in our dreams… and no one can ever take that from us.”

“You’re right,” she whispered, turning her eyes toward the floor, the pain almost searing. She needed to escape... cut this short... there was no way she could take anymore. “So, Wednesday..." she smiled sadly. "You and me? The courthouse? Will you be there?"

“Our last date,” he half smiled. “How could I miss it. I'll see you there. Good night, Casey." He leaned over and kissed the top of her head as both fought back tears, then he walked out the door without looking back.

In the days that followed, they convinced themselves they were doing the right thing. It would be foolish to go turn back. They didn’t make this choice lightly, and they had reasons. It was cold feet, they surmised, they just had to be strong. But deep down, both knew these were excuses. The truth was, fear prevented them from taking that step.

In the days, and years that followed, they each learned the most painful lesson of all:

Unspoken words never go away, they live forever in our hearts, haunting the corners of our minds. The one question never answered… “What if?” That became their burden to bear.

A/N 2: I'm sorry! It's an AU! It's an AU! They do go to court on Wednesday, and I HC each asks their lawyers, privately, what would happen if they called it off. The lawyers aren't helpful, telling them the perils of calling things off, only to file again, and in their experience, most couples end up filing again. Discouraged, each of them puts on a brave face and signs the papers. They leave the courthouse together, and Tobias walks Casey to her car where he tells her, “So much, we give it so much, and with one signature, it's over." 😭😭 But it's not over, their story hasn't reached its end.

In this universe, I want to explore real life. Where problems aren't miraculously solved. Friends and family aren’t always supportive. Issues don't disappear. Where pride and stubbornness take charge and leave people broken in their path. But we will also see the resilience of the human spirit and how people can move on, even when their heart is broken.

Will they end up together in the end? Perhaps. (She said cagily.) But if they do, it's a long and winding road that will highlight how love exists in many forms. How it morphs and changes over time, and most importantly, how… when its real… it never ends.

Perma: @a-crepusculo @animesuck3r @annoyingmillenialnewbie @crazy-loca-blog @differenttyphoonwerewolf @doriopenheart @fayeswiftie @gryffindordaughterofathena @genevievemd @inlocusmads @jamespotterthefirst @jennieausten @kingliam2019 @liaromancewriter @lucy-268 @onikalover @openheartforeverinmyheart @potionsprefect @quixoticdreamer16 @rookiemartin @socalwriterbee @secretaryunpaid @tessa-liam @trappedinfanfiction @jerzwriter-reblogs-asks @choicesmonthlychallenge @openheartfanfics

OH: @annfg8 @binny1985 @coffeeheartaddict2 @mysticalgalaxysstuff @ofmischiefandmedicine @peonierose @youlookappropriate

Tobias Only: @icecoffee90 @kyra75

[txemrn]

Maybe Someday...

Pairing: Ethan Ramey x f!OC (Tatum Erikson-Ramsey)

Word Count: ~3075

Warning: Mature audiences only; adult themes, angst; TW: heavy discussion of pregnancy, infant loss and depiction of PTSD; a few curse words, verbal fight/tension

AN: Happy Mother's Day to all the brave women out there who are mothers, who have stepped up to be mothers, who want to be mothers, who have lost mothers, and who have children being held for them in heaven. You are amazing, courageous and strong.

A/N 2: Some characters and plot belong to our friends at Pixelberry. This was not beta'd; please excuse my errors. Also, there is a more personal AN after the fic! 🖤

~🖤~

"Alright, Mama," Tatum whispers in a direct, warm tone, "just one last big push, and your sweet baby will be here." 

Feeling the gradual pressure building in her body, the exhausted mother takes a big breath, bearing all of her energy into delivering her first born child.  Suddenly, she gasps for air, both in relief and out of pure joy as her baby enters the world.  She tumbles back into her husband’s lap, his endearing arms embracing her with unbridled admiration. After nine laborious months of hoping, planning and praying, they're officially a mom and dad.

"Hey, there, precious!" Tatum squeals, "happy birthday!" She swiftly dries and stimulates the newborn, suctioning out the tiny gurgles and replacing them with the tiny cry of new life. "Dad, wanna tell everyone if we have a boy or a girl?"

Giving a tender kiss to his wife's forehead, the elated young man dabs tears from his face before looking at the baby in the physician's arms. "It… she's a girl!" Roars of celebration from the delivery nurses fill the room as the new parents sob secretly to one another, embracing their now family of three. 

Not wasting any time, the physician lays the little girl on her mom's chest as she finishes the delivery, ensuring mom and baby remain safe. After cleaning up the patient and the room, Tatum saddles up next to the bed, taking a moment to dote on the new family.

"Thank you so much, Dr. Erikson," the young woman glances up at Tatum, gently stroking her baby's back. "I could not have done this without you."

"Girl, I am so proud of you! Look at what you did." Tatum tenderly caresses the infant's chunky arms before allowing the baby to grip her finger. "What a beautiful way to bring in your first Mother's Day!" 

"Oh my gosh, that's right," the patient giggles, patting her baby on the bottom. "A Mother's Day to remember!"

Tatum smiles brightly as she squeezes the new mom's hand. "Enjoy the rest of your special day! You've earned it!" 

Grabbing her phones and pagers, the blonde obstetrician quickly makes her way to the door.

"Dr. Erikson?" The new father calls out, "would you mind if we got a picture with you and our baby girl?"

"Sweetie," his wife gently scolds, "don't you think she wants to go and enjoy Mother's Day, too?"

"It's fine," Tatum grins, holding out her arms to take the infant. "I can never get enough baby snuggles… as long as you're okay with it." 

Eagerly nodding and powering on the camera, they gently pass over their daughter. 

Cradling the partially-swaddled newborn in her hands, Tatum brings the petite infant closer to her face to coo and singsong about her cuteness. Entranced with the innocent movements, time seems to cautiously slow down, the room becoming a blur. A breath hitches thickly in the OB's throat as she gently traces the dainty features, the familiar gesture causing her mouth to run dry. The chubby fingers. The rosy nose. Long lashes sprawled heavenly across her cherub cheeks. It was like a dream, a beautiful moment in time, flooding memories of hope… and crushed dreams.

"Dr. Erikson?"

Tatum's eyes flutter. "I'm sorry, um what did you–?"

"We want one with your face!" The patient giggles, holding the camera up.

“Oh, of course,” Tatum paints on a smile. 

"Ready? Smile!"

As the flash of the camera begins to fade, Tatum gently boops the infant's button nose. "Well," she hands the baby back to the mother, "I better not take up any more of your family time."

"You probably need to get home to your own kids," the new mom suggests.

"How many kids do you have, Dr. Erikson–?" 

"--I bet you're such a good mom!"

Tatum glances at the hopeful mother's stare, filled with so much love and anticipation for the physician's answer.  "None, um, I mean, no," Tatum clears her throat, a chill almost penetrating her stormy blue gaze. "I'm not a mother."

"Oh," a tinge a sadness hits the new mom's voice. "But, I bet delivering so many babies… and coaching so many women… probably makes you feel like a mother."

"Something like that," Tatum grins, giving the patient a wink. "But what's most important here and now is that you are now a mom." She gives the woman a pat on the hand. "Have the nurses call me if you need anything. Congrats again, you guys." 

Tatum hastily exits the room. Shutting the door behind her, she exhales heavily.  Today is barely halfway done, and it has already proven emotional taxing on the chief of OB, especially after delivering her sixth baby. Which meant her sixth 'Happy Mother's Day!' Which meant her sixth clarification that she doesn't have children.

And no. She doesn't want to talk about it.

Still, Tatum takes joy in the holiday by watching other women become mothers, watching them relish in the precious moment of enduring the miraculous test of the human body and spirit, watching them bond with the actual fruit of their labor. The journey was not created for all, but if she can help it, she wants to help women enjoy the transition who desire motherhood.

Experiencing such a monumental moment is the reason she even got started in this business. Maybe this is her way of coping; maybe this is her way of healing. Maybe this is her way to ensure that every new mother savors that moment they first hold their newborn in their arms.

Maybe this keeps her memory alive, a beautifully tragic memory, full of so much love. And so much unspeakable pain.

Even after all of these years.

"Dr. Erikson! You have a delivery."

Tatum slips off her scrub cap as she moseys towards the cheery voice of the unit secretary; but, even before she reaches the desk, her eyes capture the sight of an elaborate arrangement of white lilies and roses.  She breathes in the subtle floral notes, her fingertips admiring the soft petals of the flowers. A large satin bow, accented with burlap adorns the large vase.

"These came for you, ma'am."

"Me?"  Tatum's eyebrows furrow as she notices the handwriting on the envelope to the card. Her husband. And she's instantly confused. While flowers are lovely, Ethan knows better than to send them to his wife. And surely he knows better than to send them today.

A small crowd of nurses and techs gather around as she opens the card.

"Are you about to tell us we're all about to be aunties?" One of the nurses jokes, the other staffers giggling and gasping with hope.

"Definitely not," Tatum titters, forcing a kind smile. "We just got married, you turkeys." 

"So?" More laughter erupts as the rest of the unit joins. "We're ready!"

Tatum playfully scowls, lifting open the card to read. 

To the strongest mother I've ever known, to the strongest person I've ever met. Today I celebrate you and your courage. Happy Mother's Day. -Rams

A subtle sting pulls at her vision, her heartbeat now thundering in her ears. She feels her cheeks flush with heat; from embarrassment? From love? From anger?

No, he meant well.

But, damnit, he knows better.

Tatum swallows thickly, painting a brave, chipper expression on her face. "He, uh… Dr. Ramsey wanted to brighten up the unit for mother's day.  And–" she thinks off the top of her head, "--to celebrate the day, lunch is on him!"

The labor and delivery team collectively 'aww' and clap in excitement from the generous gesture. "Well, if you aren't going to give us a baby just yet, I guess we'll settle with food," a nurse jokes as the women snicker amongst themselves, heading back to work.

Tatum speedily retreats to the physician's lounge, making phone calls to her favorite deli and putting in an emergency order with a hefty tip of appreciation.

Finally having a moment alone in the locker room, Tatum decides to freshen up from her busy morning. As she empties her pockets, Ethan's card pops out, coasting onto the tiled floor. Slowly retrieving, she anxiously opens it back up.

And she reads it again.

And again. 

Her fingertips drag across the ink, each line and stroke like a sharp blade to her heart.

She closes her eyes, concentrating on her shallow, furious breathing.  It’s fine, Tatum; it’s fine. Breathe, two, three. Exhale, two, three. Breathe, two…

Suddenly a pair of gray eyes appear in the darkness. His gray eyes. Then, his voice. 

“What’s wrong with her? Tate! Tate?!”

A pair of hands appear, gripping tightly to her tender abdomen. Another set join in, rubbing vigorously on her chest, causing Tatum to gasp and wretch on her own air.

“This is too much blood–”

“Call a rapid team–”

“Will someone page trauma–?”

One by one, more hands appear, but what once looked like her saving grace deteriorates into her hell as arms and hands tangle around her, strangling her, choking her.

“Cross and match four units–”

“Grab the methergine and hemabate–”

“We can’t let her die, too!”

“No,” Tatum exhales, her own fingertips tearing at the collar of her shirt, her nails clawing at her neck and chest.  Her tears pour like heated rivers down her flushed cheeks. “Please… stop…” 

“Dr. Erikson?”

Tatum’s eyes snap open, frantically looking around the locker room. Her attention turns towards the petite, concerned voice of the secretary, waiting by the door.

“I--I tried knocking, but--”

Tatum nods, forcing a big smile on her face. “It's fine," she swallows in relief, "that's fine.”

----------

Tatum slinks into the apartment after 9PM, instantly being greeted by the wet nose of Jenner.  

"Hey, buddy," she lovingly croons, taking his face in her hands for sweet scratches and kisses. Giving him one last pat, she quietly kicks off her shoes before heading to her bedroom through the kitchen, hoping to avoid her husband.

As she turns to head straight into the en suite, she crashes into a broad chest, arms open wide to receive her.

"Hey," Ethan hugs her tightly, pressing his lips along her hairline. "How was your day?"

"Fine."

"Yeah?  I… tried texting you–"

"I was busy." Tatum slips out of his arms as she heads to the bathroom. 

"Are you hungry?"

"No." She shuts the door; but the force behind her nudge is stronger than intended, causing it to rattle bitterly against the frame.

Ethan stares at the closed-off entrance to the room, uncertainty flooding his features.  He takes a deep breath, running a hand down his face. Irritation snarls on his mouth as his hands flex.

Then, he barges in.

"Ethan!" Tatum shrieks, quickly grabbing a towel to cover her naked body. She hugs it around her backside as she faces away from him. "Do you mind?" 

He scoffs into a sardonic snicker. He recognizes she's upset, but he's not about to let this spin out of control. "Since when do you hide yourself from me?"

"Since right now," she hisses.

"Then look at me," he growls, "and tell me to leave."

Tatum blows away a frustrated breath.  Adjusting the towel around her torso, she finally turns to face Ethan. She opens her mouth to speak, but her words fail her as her eyes lock with the devastating compassion in his gaze. She fixes a stern lip, but she can feel her own defenses crumble as his expression softens.

Ethan begins to saunter towards her, careful as not to challenge her, but with assurance and protection. Close enough to reach, he grips tenderly around her shoulders before enveloping her wholly into his tight embrace, tucking her trembling body into his own.  

Feeling the swift rush of being swept from her own feet, Tatum finally lowers her facade, melting into sobs. 

Letting her fall apart in his arms, Ethan combs his fingers into her blonde tangles before fisting her waves, drawing her into his neck. His other hand relaxes, allowing his wife to stand on her own again–but he refuses to let go. Absent-mindedly, he traces figure-eights across her back and down the slopes of her sides, feeling her ribs shutter from each cry.

"I knew today would be rough… but I'm guessing that I made things worse," he whispers, a deep gravel in his timbre. "I wasn't trying to make you upset, baby."

"I know," Tatum's words are barely audible as she twists Ethan's T-shirt into her grip. "I… I just don't want to talk about it–"

"Maybe we should talk about it."

"Rams… I…" Tatum lets go, gently shoving herself away to stare at her husband. "No."

He sighs, raising an eyebrow. "Tate, I–" he shrugs his shoulders, "all I did was send you flowers–"

"--on Mother's Day!" She snaps, pounding the side of her hand into her palm. "How could you–? I mean, why–?" she fumbles anxiously with her words before hanging her head into her hands. "It's bad enough I'm cursed with the memories–"

"--then let me be haunted with you, Tate." He gently cups her cheeks, pleading silently for her to look at him. "Facing what you did… you were–you are… so… incredibly brave–"

Tatum shakes her head, breaking out of his hold. "Don't."

She begins to storm towards her closet, but Ethan grabs her elbow, pulling her back. "Do not walk away from me, Tatum Ramsey," he steams through his nose. "I get that I may have fucked up today, but–" he lets out a humorless chuckle, shrugging, "baby, I didn't know, okay? I–I just… I love you so much. I didn't want this for you today. I didn't want you to be sad." He sucks in his bottom lip before exhaling. "It's your first Mother's Day where… you don't have to be alone with this." He tenderly takes her hand, lacing his fingers with hers. "You're not alone. Not anymore."

Tatum stares at their joined hands, her wedding band softly clanging against his. She sucks in her lips before glancing back at her husband. "I'm sorry, Rams," she breathes. 

Within an instant, Tatum is safe and sound where she's supposed to be: in Ethan's arms, his lips lost in her waves as he whispers words of reassurance.

Tatum tips her head up, her husband’s stare greeting hers. "I still don't think I'm ready to talk it… about her. About what happened."

"Okay," Ethan casually concedes, his fingers lost in her tresses. "That's fine."

"I… don't know if I will ever be ready," her voice cracks.

Ethan hooks her chin, lifting Tatum's gaze back to his own. "Maybe. Not today. But… maybe someday."

----------

Four Years Later…

"... if you are just now joining us for today's show, we are discussing maternal mortality rates in relation to postpartum hemorrhage…"

"Are you seriously listening to that?" Tatum hands Ethan his dinner as she crawls onto the couch next to him with her own meal. "You were there for the recording–"

"I know," he dices up his salmon. "But they're interviewing a long-time hero of mine."  Tatum chews quietly, her stormy blue pools locked with admiration on her husband as he nonchalantly winks at her. "Rumor has it… she's got the hots for me."

Tatum snickers, shaking her head as she drapes her ankles across his thighs.

"... I am here with Dr. Tatum Erikson-Ramsey, an OBGYN analyst for the New England Journal of Medicine and a correspondent with the American College of Obstetricians and Gynecologists. She is also the head physician and lead research analyst and developer for what is now being hailed by the World Health Organization as the 'gold standard' of defense from PPH. Of course, I'm talking about intravenous tranexamic acid." The cheerful host jokingly takes a big breath before continuing. "Thank you again for being with us, Dr. Erikson."

"Thank you for having me."

"Now, postpartum hemorrhage is clearly something you are passionate about. Pardon my pun, but what birthed this passion? No doubt you see this in the maternity ward a lot, but was there an event? Maybe a person that inspired you to dive into this research?"

"Actually," Tatum endearingly chuckles, "yes. There… is someone. A young women I met after medical school, way before I even considered OB. She found herself pregnant in a loveless, abusive relationship, and to make matters worse–" she falls silent, whispers of heavy breaths being taken. "Her baby was not compatible with life."

"God," the host gasps.

"It was… an awful situation," Tatum licks her lips. "After delivery, she lost over half her body's blood volume, losing consciousness a few times, but… she fought. She fought hard… just so she could hold her daughter before she… while she was still here."

The interviewer takes a moment. "Wow, Dr. Erikson. I… I can see why such a tragedy like that, witnessing something like that influenced your entire career. Are you… still in touch with her?"

"I am," Tatum's voice brightens. "Everyday."

"No doubt she is very proud of you."

"She is. She's… incredibly proud."

Tatum quietly looks back to her husband, a knowing sparkle in his eye with unshed tears. "You know? I'm fairly proud of her, too."

Ethan slowly leans in to kiss his wife when a sudden static from a baby monitor interrupts them, followed by a few muffled mewls until finally pained wails echo throughout their living area.  Ethan puts down his bowl, but Tatum presses her hand to his shoulder.

"I got it." She grins, quickly giving him a kiss–then another–before scurrying up to check on their five-month-old son.

"Cord?" She singsongs, padding into the darkened room. 

As soon as the blond-headed baby sees his mom, he begins to frantically pump his legs in the air. His crystal gaze tracks her movements, sticking his tongue out in joy. "Why are you crying, beansprout?" She chuckles as she brings him protectively into her arms. "I bet… you're hungry, huh? Is my big boy hungry?"

She peppers kisses across his soft head as she prepares to nurse him. Slinking back into her favorite rocking chair, she latches her son to feed as she traces his precious features.

"You have a dimple right here," she coos softly, stroking softly over the mark. And she titters to herself. "Just like your mama." Tatum takes his free hand, curling his fingers around her thumb before kissing his tiny fingertips.  "Your older sister…" her breath hitches, a teardrop sloping down her nose as she begins to chuckle. "She had the same dimple."

~🖤~

Thank you so much for your support! Every like, comment and reblog means the world to me! 🖤

~🖤~

Tags (please let me know if you wish to be added/removed)

PERMA

@alj4890 @anjanettexcordonia @ao719 @bascmve01 @charlotteg234 @issabees @kat-tia801 @kingliam2019 @mainstreetreader @mom2000aggie @neotericthemis @nikirennie87 @peonierose @socalwriterbee @tessa-liam

~🖤~

AN 3: I hope you don't mind, but I'm going to put a more personal note with this fic. As a lot of you know, I have the absolute honor and privilege of helping women become moms. When I first went back to school, I never thought I would fall in love with women's health. But even more of a surprise to me, I found a deep passion in my heart for bereavement.

I first heard the term "miscarriage" when I was 5 years old, and I remember even back then, it was such a forbidden topic; NO ONE talked about it. So, in silence, I learned that the word equated to shame and embarrassment.

Twenty years later, I took care of my first patient. And she had a miscarriage in her history. My next patient? Same. Third? She had two. I would learn from one of my mentors that ONE IN FOUR women will experience a miscarriage or loss of an infant (and it's estimated that the number is higher!). And I started wonder: if this is happening so frequently, why aren't we talking about it?

I understand this is fanfiction, and this story (along with a lot of my other angsty fics) is written for "entertainment" purposes. And of course, I want you to enjoy them! But I just wanted share with you, my beloved readers, that these subjects I write about are very near and dear to my heart. I hope you can see the underlying message of bringing awareness to motherhood tragedies and trauma in the maternity ward. I hope that the fictional voice of Tatum Erikson gives the real voice of women who continue to grieve silently. And if you are the one in four, please know that you are seen, and I am so, so very sorry for your loss.

[guqin-and-flute]

WIP TAG GAME

RULES: post the names of all the files in your WIP folder regardless of how non-descriptive or ridiculous. Let people send you an ask with the title that most intrigues them, and then post a little snippet of it or tell them something about it.

Tagged by @treemaidengeek (THANK!! 😃)

This was difficult, I kept not wanting to put a thing down because they were just a one line concept or title but it's in the rules, so I do the thing!! THIS GOT SO LONG HOLY SHIT I'M PUTTING IT UNDER READ MORE

TAGGING: @january-summers @madtomedgar @little-smartass & anyone who wants to because my brain is melted 🫠

One Offs

Xiyao (When Silk Flowers Bloom)

After the Temple

Taste of Luxury (MBMSAM)

Texts (MBMSAM)

No Evil

Ace Mingjue

Wen Qing/Qin Su

Xichen having FUN painting something silly /not like normal

Time Loop

Teach Him a Lesson (Ch. 5)

Mingjue Meets Baxia

3chen (ChenChenChen)

XXC/SL/JC

As All Things Do (Ch. 2)

Meng Yao Dancer AU

Calamity Ghost Jgy Post Canon

Meng Shi lives, sheltering Lan Xichen

Beyond Control (Ch. 2)

NMJ protect jgy from jins au

Wangxian let the world spin madly on

Wuxian is a ghost during 16 years, realizes feelings, sees A-Yuan grow up, sees Jiang Cheng, max angst --forgets the second he's resurrected [Seriously that's the title]

Parent Trap--Jin Ling makes Wwx and Jc hug DAMMIT

WWX and the only vaguely annoying haunting

Traveling with Xiao Xingchen

Peony To Lotus

How did Jiang Cheng react to Golden Core stuff?

Jin Zixuan comes to deliver invitation

Are You Here To Stop Me (Ch. 7)

ChengQing

WEN NING AND HUAISANG???

100 Days (Chapter of All the Things?)

Night Hunting at Jins >:)

Retaliation

Drunk and bitching about JZX as brother-in-law's

Wwx and Jgy both brought about end of Sunshot

JGY BIRTHDAY HAPPY AND SADS?? Everyone

Soup Bonding!!

First errand

Dancing with Yixin

Yanxiyao get together

Yanxiyao Fluff

Yanxiyao finding out

PHILANTHROPISTS/BURY MENG SHI

Yanxiyao Sick/Teamwork

Jgy decides he wants to fix WWX’s core

Swimming

Showing off Jgy

Mo Xuanyu

3zun Raise Jingyi AU

Holding Me Holding You (Ch. 7)

And A-Fu Makes 4 (Ch. 6)

THE BIG SWITCH/confronting daddy/6 month break down (it's not joy)

Competence Kink

NieYao Reconciliation

WEI WUXIAN

First Time Yanli decides Jgy is family dammit

Pre-reconciled NieLan Dueling with Thirsty JGY

Conference Night hunt with juniors

HOSTAGE??

AFTER FREAK OUT

Ask about grandparents

How did you get together?

Xichen Drunk

Nielan Snuggle (lxc pov)

JGY pushing boundaries/Mingjue’s buttons to test 

Early morning full family goofy jokey

JGY doesn’t know games and it’s SAD

JGY skin hungry, feel safe (later)

Bonding Over Kids

3am Jin Bro Bonding

Mingjue frankly talking to Xichen about him dying/Talking with Jiang Yanli 

how do 3zun deal with tantrums?

Stairs

NIEYAO MUST SNUGGLE

Jingyi's first hard night hunt

Visit Yunmeng with Yellow Father!

3zun cockblock LJY in later relationships?

Mo Xuanyu Coming Out

Weird Eating

‘Trust me’ RUN

KID #2

NHS POV

Lxc realizes he's been unhappy. He thought he was happy

Playful Xiyao seduction of nmj

HUSBANDS

Snowed In (Ch. 2)

Sword Shenanigans

Early 3zun Notes/getting together fic

Modern 3zun

When You No Longer Need To Endure (Ch. 2 & 3)

I Can Explain! (Ch. 3)

The Dadliest Chat (Ch. 2)

What do daddies do?

Jin Sibs Introduction to THE BABY

Dad Issues Confrontation

I wanna be a Stay At Home Dad, and I’m aware that makes me the worst person in the world

Sexy Times

Game Night

Mother's day is officially dubbed Yanli s day as only mother

Huaisang babysitting

Mo Xuanyu

Tarzan

Jin Papa's Road trip

[sunflouwerhabit]

hello! good day! i hope you are doing so so well and you're finding things to be happy about in your everyday life! <3

i once asked you a question on anon about the reality of vulnerable relationships, and you gave me a very very well thought out, well-articulated response, and i appreciate you so, so much for it.

i apologize for the extremely late response to it! i just wanted to tell you that the answer you gave me (oh i loved the rambling please never apologize for using your words <3) gave me a lot to think about, over time. it has genuinely made me more open to being vulnerable in relationships with my friends, as well as with my partner, and i just wanted to thank you for it. im still not very good at it, but, it's made me want to try to become better at it, so. we'll see how it goes, i guess. :]

not only that, but also seeing healthy relationships being portrayed in your fics has had such a genuine impact on me, so. just know that there's someone out there whose life you've impacted for the better, who thanks you for it. :]

also! as an update! i have since finished down the line (ASHFJDSJSGSH) !!!!!!! the angst ? the raw ??????? my heart was in my throat, oh. i LOVED it, heavens, 10/10, no notes. and !!!! im so so very excited for your and rogueskimo's in the name of being excited, i love the premise, i cannot wait to have time to read it :)))

that is all! i apologize for the looooong read, but i just needed to tell you that your answer did, in fact, help. thank you for your time. :D <3

HIIIIII HELLO <333333 it has been awhile since this ask was sent in, but reading it made me the absolute happiest ever. i remember your first ask and am so happy my very rambly response could be helpful (i am never not rambling, hehe. i have not yet mastered the art of shutting up ever!).

i’m so proud and happy for you! it’s amazing to know that my words could have some sort of impact, and the journey you’re on isn’t always easy, but starting it and making the conscious decision to try is the very hardest part, so. you’re very much on the right path 🥹❤️

i’m also not at all a natural at being open and as i’m going on my own journey of learning to be more vulnerable, i’ve also learned to afford myself quite a bit of grace because we’re all works in progress and we aren’t perfect. i was driving around with a friend i talk to about this a lot with and i told her how i felt like i had to start over again with a lot of my relationships in the past year and she reminded me that none of us are born emotionally mature/with all the skills needed to build healthy relationships and that made me feel much much much better. we all have work to do, and that’s okay, but the important part is that we’re trying 🥹

and MY BABY DOWN THE LINE!! AHHHHHH!! im so so happy you enjoyed it! my fics are my literal children and my pride and joys and im just so happy you’re enjoying them 🥹 thank you thank you thank youuuu! writing angst is my absolute passion 🤪

and it’s been long enough now that in the name of being honest is officially OUT! if you have read it, i hope you enjoyed :-) liz and i are so unbelievably proud of it!!

and thank You So much for this ask! i love love love the long messages. sending you so much love and best wishes for a lovely day 🥹❤️

[jungk0oksthighs]

Stay With Me | Perfect

exhusband!jungkook, singleparent!jungkook, unplanned pregnancy, E2L, fluff, angst, smut

Word Count - 3.5k

Your pregnancy hormones are wild enough to make Jungkook lose sleep. Warnings: swearing, explicit pregnancy sex, masturbation, tooth-rotting fluff

SERIES COLLECTION

“Jungkook…” You whisper, throwing a leg over him beneath the floral bedsheets, his bare muscular back pressed against your chest and your arm lazily draped over his middle as you pull yourself closer to him. “Jungkook….” You try again to coax a reaction from him, a little louder this time.

You’re not sure what time it is, what you do know is that it’s still dark outside and your pregnancy hormones are in full swing – the second trimester was a pain for impromptu horniness during your first pregnancy, and this one is proving to be no different.

Your ex husband is still asleep, giving that he sleeps through anything and everything under the sun you've been trying to wake him for five minutes now, but nothing is working. It’s times like this you detest how much of a heavy sleeper he is, when you’re desperate and in need of some kind of relief.

“Kook…” You pepper his shoulder blade with gentle kisses and he begins to stir, his heavy body stretching out in your hold when he hums once. “Kook… Are you awake?” You sigh, hand trailing the strong lumps and bumps of his abdomen.

“Mmm.” He hums again, smacking his lips together. You know full-well he’s still asleep, a fraction of you feels guilty for trying to disturb his slumber but there’s an ache between your thighs that you know he can soothe. An ache that you want him to soothe.

“Jungkook…” Your hand sinks lower and lower, until you find the waistband of the grey boxer shorts he’d worn to bed. Your fingertips dip beneath the fabric teasingly, you rub his skin a little harder but he still doesn’t seem to catch on to your frustration, lost to a dreamland. “Fine…” You huff, rolling onto your back to stare at the white ceiling, wide-awake.

Jungkook officially moved back in with you three weeks ago and your life has been a constant bliss ever since. He’s changed from his old stubborn ways, now helping with dinner and spending some much needed (and missed) quality time with you and Seol. You’re almost five months pregnant now, due for your gender scan tomorrow morning.

Seol came to your first scan appointment with you and Jungkook, the doe-eyed pair both tearing up upon hearing the baby Jeon’s tiny fluttering heartbeats which made you very emotional too. You're so full of love and joy recently, so much so that it almost outweighs the dreaded morning sickness you've been cursed with. It’s not the life you thought you would’ve had at this age, but you wouldn’t have it any other way.

Everything is perfect.

At least it would be if Jungkook woke up.

Feeling agitated and brazen you kick his shin, not hard, but not gentle either. This wins you another hum and some soft snores from the man beside you, one arm is bent beneath his pillow and the other hangs off the bed. There’s no sign of any movement so you try again with added force, kicking his shin and pushing his leg off the mattress with your foot.

“Mmm.” He smacks his lips together a few times again, the noise akin to him chewing something soft. You feel like screaming when his leg finds it’s way back to it’s original position on the bed and he squeezes his pillow tighter, nuzzling his cheek against it.

You exhale sharply, eyes trained to fluffy brunette hair gathered at the back of his dumb, selfish, still sound asleep head. Wow, pregnancy hormones are wild, you can’t recall the last time you were this pissed off and the poor guy’s fast asleep and has no idea.

“Jungkook.” You say loudly, sternly, burning a whole into his head.

Nothing, not even a hum or any sign of acknowledgement this time.

“Kook.” Your bitterness is amplified by another kick to his shin, this time maybe a little too hard to be considered an accident. Though there’s nothing accidental about what you’re doing and you’re fully aware of that fact.

“Jungkook. Kook. Jungkook.”

You poke at his back with your finger repeatedly, emphasising the call of his name but it’s to no avail. The man is out for the count and you know there’s nothing on earth that can disturb him when he’s in this deep of a sleep.

Sighing, you reach over to the bedside drawer and grab your battery operated boyfriend and shimmy your underwear down your legs in preparation. Thankfully you’re wearing a thin white cotton nightie with lemon detailing for bed, one of the only garments you own that still fit you by this point in your pregnancy, so it’s not too much of a hassle to set up station.

The neon pink bullet you’re holding finds it’s way to your clit when you press the on button, humming contently as the vibrations begin to ease the tension between your legs. You’re breathing heavier, the nape of your neck growing sweaty when you tuck your lower lip between your teeth to suppress shallow moans.

Like a poorly timed punchline of a bad joke Jungkook rolls over in bed, dark eyelashes still dusting the tops of his cheeks and lips still pouted as he snores. His strong inked arm finds your middle quickly and drags you closer to him, distracting you from the growing pleasure you’re giving yourself for a moment. It’s when you get back into the zone and close your eyes, focussing solely on how the vibrations feels against you that he smacks his lips together again.

“For god’s sake…” You groan flippantly, brain incapable of staying wholly committed to masturbating when your ex-husband is making chewing sounds right in your ear.

In this moment you don’t know which you’d prefer: fucking him, or killing him.

Increasing the bullet setting you sigh again, head lolling back against the pillow with a content hum. Thank god it’s doing something, you know that you’ll come soon enough if you can just focus on the task at hand. Sounds easy enough. You spread your legs a little wider, free hand coming up to cup your breast gently. Heat slowly floods your body and you know that your high is approaching, winning you to increase the speed again and suck in a breath at how sensitive you are.

Your mouth falls open, you’re so invested in the sensation deepening in your being that you don’t register that the snores have suddenly stopped. There’s no chewing sound anymore, there’s no sound at all save for the dull vibrations of every girl’s best friend.

“Y/N...?” Jungkook’s voice is quiet and heavy with sleep but it still finds a way to make you jump, eyes flying open and straight over to him.

Your ex-husband is looking at you with a tired smirk, a single brow raised as he blinks away the fatigue from his big, brown doe-eyes. Gaze flickering to the source of the noise he chuckles, the sound deep in his chest when his stare lands back on your face, the hold he has on your middle loosening. With equal parts embarrassment and caution you turn off the bullet, tossing it to the ground like nothing happened.

“Mmm?” Your lips make a flat line, fighting back an awkward smile.

At this Jungkook stretches again, big body shaking when he yawns – but still, he finds the strength to carefully climb on top of you, holding himself above your growing body with his arms. He’s smiling like an idiot, dark hair unruly and fluffy, sticking out in every direction to draw attention away from his puffy face.

“You should’ve woke me up.” He mumbles, lazily cocking his head to one side with judgement riddling his features.

You can’t stop the puff of air from escaping your nostrils, your eyes rolling into the back of your skull. “I tried, trust me I tried.” You admit, laughing breathily.

“Not hard enough apparently.” He giggles, lowering his head to rest in the crook of your neck. “Next time just grab my cock and hop on, you know I don’t mind.”

Before you can respond his lips find yours, he kisses you gently, softly, albeit a little lazily. You kiss him back, bringing your hands to his messy hair where you tug on the locks very delicately, pulling him closer. It’s not long before a hum of approval falls from his mouth and into yours, along with his tongue and a weak moan. Using his knee he spreads your legs further apart, sucking timidly on your lower lip.

“I love you.” He whispers, voice croaky, lips making their way down to your jawline to litter the area with small kisses.

You exhale in bliss, a coy smile tugging the corners of your mouth, “I love you too.”

Jungkook’s breath is humid against your neck when he reaches one hand down to tug off his boxer shorts, kicking them out of bed. Spitting on his palm he smears the lubricant over his already hard cock, hooded eyes trained on you eagerly waiting for him to make you feel good. You offer him a kind, thankful smile and he chuckles in return.

“I’m serious, next time just wake me up. I’m never gonna get tired of waking up to you.”

You bite back a grin, “It wasn’t for lack of trying, nothing can wake you up.”

"Your vibrator woke me up." He reminds you with a tired smile, quirking a single brow.

"Sorry..."

“Roll onto your side.” He whispers, kissing you sweetly, voice so quiet it’s barely audible, and you oblige.

It’s when you’re lying on your left you feel his weight shift on the bed behind you, his warm hand carefully gripping your knee and lifting it in the air to give himself more room. Soon enough you feel the tip of his cock align with your slick entrance, he coats himself with some of it before slowly pushing himself inside. Your mouth falls open again, a content sigh escaping you when every inch is stuffed in your walls, you feel so full, so relieved yet still so frustrated all at once.

“You’re so beautiful…” He hums, adjusting his position until he’s right behind you, still holding your leg up in place. “So, so beautiful.”

“Please Kook…” You whimper shamelessly, pushing your hips back onto him.

“Don’t worry baby I’ve got you.” He kisses your shoulder, withdrawing himself almost entirely before pushing back in. It’s slow, very slow, intimate and almost docile. He’s fucking into you at a languid pace, keeping a steady rhythm that has you both breathing heavy and whispering profanities.

He replaces his hand on the bend of your knee with his forearm, dipping his fingers between your legs to massage your clit, just as leisurely as he’s making love to you.

“Oh-,” You exhale, a breathy groan betraying you, “Don’t stop, please… Don’t stop.” You beg him with tiny whispers, peering over your shoulder to catch a glimpse of him.

Jungkook’s eyes are fluttered shut, kiss-swollen lips ajar, brows pinched ever so slightly as if he’s really concentrating on the feeling of what he’s doing to you. It’s when his tongue darts out to wet his lips that his shiny eyes slowly open, catching yours instantly. He smiles, breathing heavier and rubbing your sensitive area a little harder – never picking up the pace.

“Please don’t stop...” You repeat with a sigh, the familiar pang of heat beginning to envelop every nerve in your body.

He kisses your shoulder again, rolling his hips into you deeper with each thrust, being sure not to knock your stomach with his hand. “I don’t think I can,” He stifles a chesty moan by biting his lip, “I want you too much to stop.”

The combination of his lazy thrusts and inked fingers rubbing your clit has you close to reaching your peak, you’re quietly panting for air when your body grows even warmer than before. It’s when Kook’s shallow breaths turn to hushed grunts and groans that he pushes himself inside even deeper, filling you up to the brim all while sloppily massaging your sensitive bundle of nerves.

“Jungkook…” You whine, chewing your lip to keep quiet. “Right there, shit, right there…”

“Mmmmph,” He hisses, feeling your walls beginning to tighten, “Come for me baby, wanna feel you c-come.” His words lost to the sound of a guttural moan escaping your lips, spilling into your hands that try to conceal the noise when you come intensely and seemingly out of nowhere, walls pulsating and throbbing around his thick cock.

“Shit shit shit shit…” Jungkook exhales shakily, gripping your hip to drag you back further onto his length. “Gonna come, fuck.” He squeezes his eyes shut, burying his face into your shoulder when his own orgasm reaches his peak and he spurts strings of hot come deep inside you, occasionally thrusting back into you to ride out his high.

With a bit of effort he pulls out of you with a breathy chuckle, falling back-first onto the bed before snaking his arms round your middle and pulling you close. You feel as though a huge weight has been lifted from your body, all your muscles soft and wobbly with post-orgasm bliss when you curl up against Jungkook’s strong chest, to which he plants a sweet kiss to your temple and sighs.

“Get some sleep,” He hums, hand reassuringly rubbing the spans of your torso, “Big day tomorrow, or today… What time is it?”

But you don’t answer him, sleep having finally come easy to you now that you’ve been taken care of. Jungkook laughs tiredly, smoothing out your hair before softly kissing your head, attempting to succumb to his own slumber that was so rudely interrupted by your whimpers and the dull vibrations of the bullet he hates so much.

Pregnancy is wild.

--

“What if it’s two boys?” Seol grins from the chair at the far end of Dr Kim’s purple office, “It’ll be four boys to one girl at home.”

Oh god, truthfully you hadn’t thought of that. You’ll be outnumbered to say the least, and as discovered with Seol potty training boys can be somewhat difficult… And he was only one baby. Your eyes widen, mouth turning dry as Jungkook’s grip on your hand tightens. You’re both looking at the screen expectantly, Dr Kim pressing the medical device into your rounded abdomen to get a better look of the babies.

“I don’t think I could put up with four of you,” You snicker, playfully rolling your eyes, “You two are demanding enough as it is.” Despite Seol being thirteen now he is in fact quite the mommy’s boy, and now that you and Jungkook are back together he too is very needy for your attention. It’s nice though, it’s a lot nicer than things used to be between you both that’s for sure. You wouldn't change this for the world.

“I take it you’re hoping for two baby girls?” Dr Kim asks with a genuine, dimpled grin. Over the course of your pregnancy you’ve grown very fond of Dr Kim, especially since your HG diagnosis. He always checks in on you, never gets angry when Jungkook calls him at 3AM with concerns about your health. He’s just a great doctor, you feel safe in his presence and at this point you’d consider him to be more of a friend rather than a medical professional.

“Or just the one.” Jungkook beams, gnawing his lips anxiously, “One of each doesn’t sound too bad.”

“Well I can tell you that you won’t be blessed with a boy and a girl,” Dr Kim chuckles, “Babies are sharing the same sack meaning they’re identical. So they’re either both girls or both boys.”

Jungkook’s grip on your hand is strong enough for you to frown, wincing slightly. He’s so nervous bless his soul. It’s no secret that he wants to be a girl-dad, even when you were pregnant with Seol he hoped for a girl – longing for a daughter to protect and father, to braid her hair, hold her hand, support her dreams and show her the ways of the world and be her number one fan when she takes it by storm.

Of course he wasn’t disappointed with how things worked out in the end, he loves having a son now, someone to talk to about Marvel superheroes and arm wrestle with. Seol and Jungkook are one of the same, like they’ve been copied and pasted and their bond is unbreakable, they may be father and son but they're also best friends.

However you know that Kook longs for something different, a new parenting experience, and the way his features have washed pale and clammy is just a reminder of how much he’s really hoping for a baby girl. Well, two baby girls.

“We’ll be happy either way.” You smile, glancing at Jungkook who hasn’t stopped sweating or attempting to break your hand since you laid down on the doctors bed.

Kook nods in agreement, though his profile is still crumpled with anxiety, “Right… As long as they’re healthy.”

“Well everything looks good, heartbeats are perfect, babies are as big as they should be things look to be in order and healthy.” Dr Kim smiles, brows raising when he catches sight of something on the monitor you and Jungkook are clearly not noticing, “So would you like to know the gender now? Or we can have it put in an envelope for you to open privately, or we actually sell confetti cannons at the reception if you’re having a gender reveal—”

“Now.” Jungkook’s leg bounces impatiently, “We’d like to know now please.” He lifts your entwined hands to his lips, kissing your fingers gently.

“Y/N?” Dr Kim eyes you cautiously, making sure, “You’re sure you’d like to know?”

“Yes.” You nod quickly, heart racing in your chest which is comically obvious on one of the monitors hooked up to your fingertip. “We’d like to know now please, Seol come over and see!”

Dr Kim uses his right index finger to point to the screen, truthfully the image is nothing more than fuzziness and uncertainty to you, but you can make out the tiny faces that are looking to each other. One baby has their hand up displaying what looks to be a peace sign with their two exceptionally small fingers and you, Jungkook and Seol all laugh.

"That's my girl." Kook gasps, eyes big and rounded with astonishment.

"Or boy." Seol adds, taking pictures of the babies on his phone.

“Okay so do you see this here? This is baby number one’s pelvis,” The Dr is pointing at the screen, Seol is squinting at the image equally as confused as you but Jungkook seems to catch onto something you don’t, his grip loosening.

“Is that… A penis?” He says somewhat sheepishly, disappointment evident in his words.

At this Dr Kim bites back laughter, nose scrunching, “Not quite, that’s baby number two’s foot.”

“Oh.” Kook exhales, and you can’t help but snort. “I don’t see anything…”

“Exactly.” Dr Kim nods, a knowing grin pulling his plump lips when he continues to point at the screen, circling one area, “This is where baby’s penis would be, if she had one.”

Jungkook’s chin quivers, not once does he look away from the television, nor can he stop smiling, “She?” He asks for confirmation, doe-eyes glassy and swimming in emotions.

“She.” The Dr nods again, a heartfelt smile warming his features, “Congratulations mom and dad, you have two healthy baby girls on the way.”

You and Seol share a loving look, “I’m gonna have two little sisters! I can beat up their boyfriends and teach them karate!” He exclaims proudly, “Can I name one of them? That one will be my favourite—”

“That’s not how that works you can’t have a favourite Seol.” You roll your eyes with a giggle, using your free hand to hold your sons.

But to Jungkook your conversation fades to white noise, his heart is racing, grin stretching from ear-to-ear, he’s not sure if he’s even blinked since the revelation was made. He’s going to have two beautiful baby girls, two daughters, two tiny loves of his life to raise and protect. His chest bursts with pride, tears cascading down the skin of his cheeks. He tries to wipe them away with his jacket sleeve but it’s no use, he’s fucking sobbing, breath catching in his throat, vision blurred.

Everything is perfect.

x