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hwanghyunjinenthusiast · 2 years ago

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a tiger's dominion [1] • k.s.y.

“Some days you tame the tiger, and some days the tiger has you for lunch.”

Pairing: kwon soonyoung x afab!reader

Genres: porn with PLOT (minors dni!), camstars!au, university!au, best friends/idiots!au, goofy comedy, cheesy fluff, a sprinkle of angst

Warnings: cam shows and camera sex obv, swearing, prolly fake myths about sex and stuff idk ignore it for plot pls fdksj, sort of mutual masturbation (m&f), reader wears hoshi's clothes, hoshi regards his viewers as females, pet names like kittens, pussycats, etc., degradation, hypothetical shower sex, mentions of breeding, b00bs <333, WAP lmao, sex toys (vibrator/dildo), fingering, squirting, multiple orgasms, me thinking I'm sooo funny and uhh as always lmk if i missed anything!

WC: 8.5k

A/N: I can't believe this is going to be my hoshi fic debut but that's what it is! Special thanks to marvelous @huiranghaes for reaching out and asking me to join the svthub collab and the lovely mushroom for letting me write in her place (this is for her honestly 🥺), please check out the other incredible works on the masterlists! Also special thanks to my darling bestie wife @onlymingyus for helping w/ the planning details, confidence boosting, and so much more! P.S. there are some fun cameos and crossovers scattered throughout, do lmk if you want in on one in future parts :D

➯ a tiger's dominion ◇ [teaser] ◇ [part 2]

Personal Taglist: @aceofvernons @joshibambi @junhui-recs @httpswonwoosglasses @pandorashbox @rubyscoups @noraehey @charcharfairy @woozluv @hoshistar96

↳ Join the svthub taglist here!

"Horang-HEY kittens," the man purrs — yes, purrs — voice low and gravelly. It's not a surprise, considering his dick is already out for all to see as he slowly begins jerking himself off. "How're my pretty lil pussycats doing this fine evening? Desperate for me already? Don't be shy 'cause I'm already leaking for you."

You inhale sharply through your nose as comments flash rapidly across the screen. You can practically hear the pings of monetary value that just have to be pouring through even though you're on the other side of the camera. Reminding yourself that this is a recording, you wiggle the mouse and skip ahead.

"Whoa, wait! What are you doing?" A voice screeches in a different register but it's similar enough tone to the one echoing from your speakers.

With a frown, you look down at the hand that shot out to grab your own. It seems inconceivable to think that the tiny fingers over yours are the same ones wrapped around the red, hard cock dripping with pre-cum in the video. Perhaps that's why it looks so... big. It's the only explanation you'll accept.

You regret glancing once more at your laptop's paused screen because the smirk displayed right before it cuts off at the top now plays on the lips of the man sitting next to you.

"You're gonna miss all the good stuff!"

"I'm not missing anything, Soonyoung. You cam and you're a dude. I'm sure there's nothing new here that I haven't seen before."

The silver-haired man gasps, scandalized. "You think I'm unoriginal. Me. 0riginalTiger69? The one and only Hoshi? Hah! What would you know? You said you don't even watch porn."

"I don't. Why would I need to use anything to get off when I can simply turn on the camera and have everyone watch me instead?"

"So you're only horny when you cam? You never, like, do it alone? Watch some things here and there."

"These days? Not really, don't need to."

Soonyoung shakes his head. "Wow..."

"I'm not insatiable, goofball. Sure I watched livestreams when I first started for some inspo but now... well, you'll find out your stamina can only peak for so long."

"I have incredible stamina, thank you very much. My kittens love it. Salivate over it. Something you'd know if you watch any of my videos."

"Which I'm not going to," you sigh, "and you did not just say kittens with a straight face. I'll find it super amusing if you're still able to go at the same pace you are now some time down the road."

"They're my lovely kittens and don't worry, I'll be sure to keep you updated." His eyes narrow. "You know, you're awfully calm about finding out how your best friend is a camboy."

"Compared to you, yes." Referring to his call at three in the morning, shrieking in your ear that he finally connected all the dots. "You'd be surprised how many familiar faces are scattered throughout the community."

"How many do you know? Have you watched their shows?"

You throw your hands up in the air. "Omigod, how many times do I have to say, I don't watch porn! I make it!"

"Okay, okay." Technically, Soonyoung should know better than to rile you up with long nails waving dangerously close to his face. But he still presses on. "All I'm saying is that you're insanely chill about all of this."

"Bestie, we've been at this since you knocked on my door at ass 'o clock."

"It was only ten!"

"You know I don't wake up before noon!" You take a deep breath. "What's even the point of all of this?"

Soonyoung's brown eyes dart across your room. Taking in the expensive tripod and lighting setup at the desk to the strange, almost clinical, neatness of the rest of your bedroom. How easily he believed when you said it was an investment to perfect your scholarly presentations. Silly. Now it all made sense. He waves his phone with your Svthub profile on display.

"Do a collab with me."

"Huh? … What? Nah. No way. Nuh-uh."

"Just hear me out," he leans in close causing you to scoot your chair back. "My kittens have been begging me to collab with a certain Tigress."

"Ew, don't say it like that."

Hearing it out loud certainly has a much higher cringe value than seeing it typed by faceless viewers or saying it in the privacy of your own room. Alone and too turned on, well-immersed in your role. It's even worse when it comes out of your best friend's mouth.

"Sorry, should I say Miss TigerLily_61596 instead? Hm. Isn't that my birthday?"

"Oh, it is!" You pray and hope he doesn't notice you lying through your teeth. "The computer somehow generated it, how funny is that?"

Soonyoung pouts. "You use that for all your passcodes." To prove his point, he picks up your phone lying between the two of you and unlocks it easily with the pin of 61596 as expected. "See? Knew it. Hao says that isn't a good cybersecurity measure, you really should be more careful. Remember his lecture? Always use protection!"

You snatch it back. "Leave me alone. It's not like everyone knows your birthday!"

"I'm announcing it on my next stream."

"Do it, you won't."

"I will!"

"Wait, don't. That's a serious security concern, you idiot. Everyone just wants to see you jerk off anyways, nobody wants that personal stuff unless they're creeps. Which you do not want."

"I don't," he acknowledges, "you've been doing this for a while, right?"

"Yeah. Two and a half years soon."

"Wow. Perfect! You should do something big as a celebration. Like collaborating with me."

"Why are you so hellbent on this?"

"Look. Everyone tells me we'd look great together — which is true — but I had no idea how to work up the nerve to send a DM to Miss TigerLily_61596 and propose such an idea. Until! I find out my bestie is the famed Tigress herself! Plus… I have a few experiences here and there."

"So you're using me," you cock your head, "and I don't do collabs. It only attracts potential weirdos into wanting to reach out and I've finally curated a steady, safe viewer base that I'm not looking to change. And what's this about experiences?"

"I'm not using you!" Soonyoung chews on his lip. "And that's another story for another time. It was only an idea, really… I get it. It's not like you wanna fuck me either."

"I don't," you affirm. "Besides, you're going to have to talk to Yuna about the whole camboy schtick, and then you want to try and explain that you had sex with someone who just happens to be me, your bestie? That's not gonna fly so don't drag me into it."

"Probably not a good first date discussion but," he laughs, "I'm sure I'll figure it out. She doesn't seem too judgy. After all, she agreed to go out with me next week."

"Congratulations!" You pat him on the shoulder and stand up, needing to take a step back from his proximity. The sudden suffocation of being wrapped up in his presence can be a little too much. "Forget all these camming shenanigans and just focus on her. This is your chance. You've had a crush on her for months now, can't afford to mess it up."

"Yeah, well." He scratches the back of his neck. "I think I'll still keep camming. Svthub's payoff is great and well… I'm afraid I'll wear her out too much if not."

"Huh? Are you… talking about… sex?"

"Duh. I wasn't lying earlier, I have a mad stamina game."

You pinch your nose when he smirks. "I don't think that's what she'll complain about."

"You don't get it. It's why all the other ones broke up with me."

"That is so not true," you argue. "Chaewon said you talked in your sleep too much, Seoyoon complained that your ego was inflated to max capacity, and Eunhye was tired of you bringing up tigers to get out of every serious conversation! And don't even get me started on what your roommate complains about."

Soonyoung sulks. "Gee, they really confided in you. Okay, sure — maybe that's all true but I also get told off for having too high of a sex drive."

"Sounds like a 'you' issue but maybe that'll be humbled in a couple months or so. Not my problem."

"Well, maybe you can help me resolve it… if we did a collab!" He chuckles in mischievous glee when you throw a ball of socks at his head. "Just kidding, unless?"

"Get out, you heathen!" You shriek. "Get out before I throw my hair dryer at your head next!" His laughter fades out as he escapes into the hallway. "The world will have to tip over and break off its axis before I fuck you, Soonyoung!"

Apparently, the world did decide to fall apart on you specifically, the universe playing a losing game of monopoly with your life, and whatever godly figures cruelly laughing in your face. Giving you a major middle finger and mocking you relentlessly. You watch the raindrops trickle down the window of the passenger side, similar to your tears that threaten to break loose at any time.

Soonyoung periodically glances at you as he drives, worry wrinkling his brow. "You doing okay?"

"Do you think I'm okay?" You hiss out although he doesn't flinch, knowing you're not pissed at him, per se. "I'm soaking wet, I have no car now, and I could barely pay the towing fee because I just submitted my final tuition and the rest of my stupid bills! This fucking sucks."

"I could lend you some mon — "

"I don't want anyone's money. I was doing perfectly fine until this utter and complete bullshit of a disaster."

It's silly because even though you're seething in well-deserved anger, Soonyoung can never understand how you manage to look so radiant. You're acting like a bedraggled cat about to claw someone's eyes out and yet you wear the fierceness so well. It has always suited you. Though he feels bad about the shitty situation you're now in, he can't help but crack a small smile.

"Okay, don't threaten me right now because I'm driving — which I'm more than happy to do for you any time, anywhere — but you'll also die if you attack me. So… about that collab?"

"Kwon Soonyoung." It's true. He's lucky he wasn't behind the steering wheel of a transportation vehicle or you would've thrown something at him with the rage circulating in your entire cell system. "I swear to the high heavens — "

"Just hear me out. I did the math — "

"Oh no."

He sighs your name. "I thought about the math and there's a good chance we'll make at least more than double what we would by ourselves. You know how Svthub caps us out with how many solo streams we do per month. But. If you did a few in addition to our collab, you could easily make up for what you had to spend today."

He wasn't wrong. While it was nice that Svthub had policies in place to prevent its camming community from making an unfair and absurd amount of money, it was already halfway through the month. You had successfully hit the average amount you usually do to comfortably cover the routine bills and expenditures. But even if you were lucky to max out, it would not be enough to pay for the unprecedented car repairs — or even worse, another vehicle. And though Soonyoung and your friends were more than happy to drive you around, you still wanted to give them gas money or offer to buy lunch despite their protests.

You're quiet in deep contemplation the rest of the short drive and Soonyoung's surprisingly patient. You frown when you realize he's parked outside of his new apartment complex.

"What're we doing here?"

He shrugs. "It's closer and I'm worried you're gonna get sick if you don't change into something dry soon. You can even stay the night. Besides, Hoon's either locked inside his studio or not home at all. You know how he's been disappearing lately."

"Maybe he found a significant other."

"Jihoon? Lee Jihoon? We talking about the same dude that runs away from human interaction like it's the plague?" He pauses in thought. "But he basically just lets me live here by myself so maybe you're right… "

"It's possible if he found 'the one.'" You make air quotes and then sigh as you eye your best friend's much nicer building through the sheets of rain. "Maybe I should move back to the dorms."

"Please don't. I swear Chan was experiencing a second-hand high when he came to practice last night. Certainly smelled like it."

"Just 'cause he was a little uncoordinated doesn't mean he was high. Heard he went out drinking beforehand anyways."

"Guess I should be pushing them harder," he mutters and you can't help but shudder at his darker tone.

"Chill out, Mr. Captain. You'll make them cry again."

Soonyoung was a loud, irritating but loveable goofball day-to-day. Yet when it came to his team, he was a different beast. Firm, strict, and often harsh enough that a few of his younger members have come whining to you. As if you could do anything. It's sometimes hard to picture him as anything else but squishy and sweet, especially when he takes off his jacket to wrap around your shoulders.

You don't dare to let your mind wander about what he's like during sex.

"I haven't made anyone cry. Yet."

"That's because the last thing they want to do is come crying to you. Especially when you were the cause of their tears." You tug at the lapels of the jacket around your body. "Thank you but I didn't need this, I'm dripping wet."

"That's what she said!"

And just like that, he's got you rolling your eyes with his toothy grin and boyish laughter that's muffled once you get out and slam the car door shut. He calls your name to no avail and surrenders to chasing after you. Finally catching up to your fast-set pace because you're stuck waiting for the elevator, Soonyoung nudges your side teasingly. Despite the initial complaint, his jacket is pulled tight over your damp clothes that easily catch the intense breeze of the lobby's air conditioning.

"Can't say I'm not funny."

"It's called 'acting like a child'. I didn't want to ruin the inner side of your nice jacket."

"Hey, it's not a big deal. I'm just trying to help my bestie out. You were shivering and I don't want any perverts eyeing my girl's assets."

You scoff. "Worry more about your own assets, like, don't look now but the receptionist is so checking you out."

An idiot never changes their ways because Soonyoung does look.

Shooting a lazy smirk that has the poor woman nearly fainting on the spot at the sight. You don't blame her. At least it's easy to ogle him when he's turned away, white t-shirt that's now soaked easily sticks to his well-defined upper body. A delicate silver chain lays against his collarbones while droplets anyone would die to catch with their tongue slide from his jawline down to his neck. You lick your lips the same time he does before he's running a hand through his silver bangs and sending a wink her way.

So, you punch him. In the abdomen. Lightly.

Even though he yelps in pain, you're sure your knuckles hurt more from his stupidly ripped abs. You shake out your wrist as you enter the elevator with Soonyoung two steps behind.

"I told you not to look."

"Telling me to not do something only tempts me to do it even more."

"Noted. And in that empty brain of yours, don't forget that you have a date," you remind him. Maybe it's a reminder to yourself as well. "Speaking of which, enlighten me how you think this collaboration is by any means a good idea."

"It'll give you the money you need."

"I'm not some charity case, Soon. You don't have to do this for me."

"You're not a charity case, you're my best friend. I'd do anything for you." He takes your hand in his and squeezes it.

Fighting down the butterflies, you rest your head on his shoulder. "You're too good to me."

"Remember that next time you make fun of me." He chuckles when you flinch at his gentle forehead flick as the elevator dings upon the arrival to the designated floor. "Let's sort out the details after we get some dry clothes on, yeah?"

Soonyoung strolls into the shared apartment with you not far behind. He peels off his shirt, flinging it right past your head into the awaiting laundry basket behind you.

"What do you think you're doing? That almost hit me in the face!"

He shrugs. "Jihoon's not home so feel free to get comfortable." The words are barely out of his mouth when you shrug off his jacket and toss it to join his discarded shirt. "Whoa, what are you doing?"

"You said to get comfy. Please, I'm not even naked — which you act like you haven't seen before."

"Huh?"

You cross your arms, refusing to let your gaze drop lower than his pretty eyes. "Did you forget? Communal shower incident? Speaking of which, would you mind if I got a quick shower first? I feel crummy as hell after getting rained on twice."

"Uh, yeah. Yeah. Sure."

Soonyoung's voice thickens as he visibly gulps at the sight of your clothes that cling to your curves like a second skin. You miss his glazed-over eyes and pupils blown wide as you fuss with taking off your blouse, the thin camisole underneath leaving nothing to the imagination.

"I'll… I'll be right back," he stutters out and backs away slowly, gears barely turning in his brain. "Um. I'll... go and... get you some... uh, clothes. Yeah. Clothes. To change into."

"Thanks!"

You remain oblivious to his actions because Soonyoung occasionally reacts weirdly when he's reminded that you are a female friend rather than just one of the boys that he hangs out with. It's a particular scratch on his brain and a tightness in his pants but not necessarily in a bad way. You both check each other out. But he's never, ever once acted on it since you've met him until this new suggestion of a collaboration — one that involves sex, no less.

To say you're not thrown off would be a lie. You mull it over as the comforting, hot water washes away the grime, stress, and bad feelings of the day. Technically, it's not necessarily a bad idea. Unfortunately, capitalism runs the world and you need the money. The act of sex with Soonyoung doesn't worry you as much as what will happen afterward.

Stupid feelings.

Yet as you step out of the shower enveloped in the familiar scent of your best friend's shampoo, all you can do is beam like the whipped person you are upon seeing the neatly folded pile of clothes he left on the bathroom sink counter. A loose t-shirt and fuzzy hoodie accompanied by a black pair of boxers. You sigh in comfort at feeling much more refreshed in dry clothes and open the door.

"Could've just given me some gym shorts, kinda intimate of you to share your underwear with me."

Soonyoung looks up, hiding a fond smile at the sight of you in his clothes behind the can of cheap beer he's sipping on. "Trust me when I say those are cleaner than any of my shorts right now."

"Ew. Please don't elaborate on that. What about those tiger-striped ones I bought for your birthday? Don't tell me you actually wear those," you tease as you plop down on the couch next to him. Only to choke when he pulls the waistband of his gray sweatpants down enough for you to see the telltale sign of indeed, tiger print fabric.

"Wear 'em every stream, baby. I'm telling you, they love it."

"You've got to be joking," you mutter and shake your head, "are we ready to finally talk about this ordeal?"

"I was born ready. So, what're you thinking?"

Your eyebrows wrinkle. "I thought you had this big, brilliant plan."

"Not really. Like, I don't know what you'd feel okay doing with me so I thought you could at least throw some stuff on the table first."

"Oh. Um. I don't know. Maybe something like... mutual m-masturbation?"

"Hm, kind of boring. I mean, isn't that what we technically already do? What's going to make this different?"

"Well... there would be two people on-camera... I... I don't know!" You throw your hands up. "Do you have something better in mind?"

"Actually, yeah. You need the money fast but rushing into this might not be the best idea. We have to learn more about each other. Sexually." Even though you're wrinkling your nose, he keeps talking. "Preferences, kinks, likes, dislikes. You've never really watched me before so why don't you tune into my livestream? I'll give you all the money I make tonight if you do."

"Tonight?" you repeat with a squeak, mouth suddenly dry. "Like, tonight tonight?"

"Got my lucky tiger stripes on for a reason, baby. Ain't no time like the present."

"Oh my god. I... I... "

"Relax," Soonyoung laughs, "you'll enjoy it."

"I... I don't think I will."

"You're totally overthinking it. I can see your brain thrashing in a meltdown state right now."

"This is all very weird, can you blame me?"

"Nah but," he wiggles his eyebrows. "I'll make it worth your while. Just think about all the money I'll pull."

"Right. That definitely sounds sexier."

"Hey!"

"You better make bank tonight, tiger boy. Hard to believe there would be that many people enamored with whatever furry act you've got going on."

"That sounds rich coming from you."

You gasp. "... Have you been watching my streams?" He doesn't answer, simply blinks. Once. Twice. Three times. "How long, Kwon Soonyoung?"

"... Only since my viewers suggested it. I didn't even know it was you though!"

"Ohhhhh my god, no wonder you... Lord. Unlike you, I'm not a furry. They call me Tigress for the aesthetics. Obviously, I'm not going to use my real name."

"Uh-huh, keep telling yourself that. Say, do you really have a tiger lily tatt on your inner thigh?"

"Guess you'll have to figure it out yourself," you jeer, "since you seem to know so much about me."

"Is that a challenge?"

You stick your tongue out, swatting away his hand that sneaks toward your lower body. Soonyoung's never backed down from a provocation but you weren't going to let him win or have the upper hand he seemed to be controlling right now. "No, it is not."

"I can wait." He acquiesces and leans back, now with a smug smile. "I'll have you naked for me soon, anyways."

"If you're lucky," you fire back, "you're going to have to impress me first."

"Trust me, bestie. When haven't I? I'll be sure to have your jaw dropping for me in more ways than one."

You're in your best friend's room on your back and lying on his bed. The only source of light is radiating from the phone in your hands as it loads Svthub's website. Weighing your options, you log out and search for 0riginalTiger69, chewing your bottom lip at the sight of the blinking red dot next to his profile.

What harm could this do?

Probably an irreparable amount of damage.

Your finger hovers over the screen, anxiety filling your gut. It was now or never. With a deep breath, you squeeze your eyes shut and tap the play button. It's silent through your earbuds for a good five minutes and your eyes fly back open thinking you clicked the wrong icon. Ironically, you breathe out a sigh at the sight of Soonyoung in a plain t-shirt paired with his infamous boxers while a "Welcome AnonymousUser75923!" banner scrolls along the top of the screen.

Suspicions confirmed, you make a mental note to tell him that he could turn off that function if he wanted. That is — if you could even look him in the eye after this.

You can't see his face but unfortunately, you do know what it looks like. Cursing yourself for imagining his furrowed eyebrows that match the pout on his lips as he reads the comments popping along the bottom of the screen.

"Horang-HEY to all the lovely kittens joining me this fine evening. Hello CherryScouper_95, why do I still have my clothes on? Ah, that's to keep the suspense! I'm still waiting for a few more to hop on." He leans in closer to the camera, the red welt on his neck catching everyone's attention. "Haha, this? No, it's not a hickey, Jejusb00s but you're free to give me one if you'd like. I just happen to have a mean friend who finger-flicked me for no reason. Now that I think about it..."

Soonyoung mutters something to himself and pulls out his phone. You jump when yours buzzes.

Soonyoung laughs. "No, 4ngelic_m3nace, I said flicked not fucked. You know I'm not really into that."

You're practically gnawing off your lip at this point, cheeks heating up if you're reading into what he really means correctly. It's actually impressive how he seamlessly texts you and interacts with his viewers. Now you're curious how many times he's replied to people's regular messages during a stream.

More times than you can guess.

"Do my precious lil pussycats have any suggestions for tonight? I wanna spice things up and get those nice tips coming in. Go on and talk to me. All your dirtiest fantasies and wettest dreams."

woolove: i wanna be yours and you be mine so we can fuck for days nonstop 🤩

h0rny49yu: lemme lick the sweat off of ur abs 👅👅👅👅

"Woolove, kitten, you know I don't belong to anyone but I'll take you up on that second part. We can go for weeks even." He reads the next comment aloud with a smirk. "My abs, hm?"

A rapid flurry of comments and monetary pings commence when he teases a scrumptious view of the taut muscles underneath his shirt with one hand, still clutching his caseless phone in the other. The glow of Jihoon's neon light signs contributes to the enticing visual your best friend manages to pull off.

You had been extremely shocked when Soonyoung admitted to using the sacred studio of this generation's genius music producer to stream. At first, you figured that he was just doing it to be polite because he had discouraged you (rather strongly) from going into his roommate's bedroom tonight — a space you often slept in with how often Jihoon was out. But it was in fact the truth, judging by a quick glance of the thumbnails for his other videos on Svthub.

s0turned0n: show us the goods! 💃🏻💃🏻 get naked! 🕺🏻🕺🏻🕺🏻🕺🏻 release the 🍆🍌🥒🍑🎆🧨🎇

AnonymousUser69034: you? on your back. me? on top. hotel? Trivago 💅🏼

hoshis_d1ck: 1 hour in a room alone n i'll blow ur mind and ur dick 😳👉🏼👈🏼

"Ah, we're getting somewhere. My loyal kitties know I reward well. When they listen to me." Soonyoung cups his chin as if in deep thought. "You're all acting so cute even though I've told you before how dangerous it is 'cause there's no off switch on a tiger… that is, if you can catch me first."

woolove: buying a tiger-size collar and leash rn 💋

"Aw woolove, tip me enough and I'll consider getting it myself. Maybe."

t1ge3r_rat: cage the (derogatory) tiger !!!

He tries to hide his snort, easily identifying your new screen name, and tosses his phone on the desk in front of him. "Caging? Now that's new. How about something a lil more romantic though? I like playing gentle with my pussycats."

t1ge3r_rat: weak

Another rush of comments flies past. Littered with cheesy requests, fluffy ideas, and the usual questionable plea. But one, in particular, catches your eye. Not that it's hard to miss.

cumdaywh0ring: 💦💦💦💦💦 SHOWER SEX!!!!!!!!!!!! SHOWER SEX!!!!!!!! 💦💦💦💦💦

Your mind traitorously drifts back to earlier. The momentary sinful imagination of Soonyoung pausing when he placed the clean pile of clothes down on the bathroom sink. A timid glance towards the shower where he hears you humming only to freeze, lips parting at the silhouette of your alluring figure through the curtain.

Shit.

t1ge3r_rat: i second the shower sex 😗✌🏻

"Shower sex, eh?" Of course, the bastard immediately sees your agreement and picks it out of all the others. He grunts, a hand sliding back down past his covered abs to grope at the girth hidden within his tiger-striped boxers. "My kittens do have to be nice and wet for me. All needy and clinging onto my shoulders. Pressed up hard against the shower wall so we don't slip 'n fall."

t1ge3r_rat: safety first!!

dickarawrous420: hot 🚿

CherryScouper_95: even hotter if u took ur clothes off ~

8starfucks: we should all be naked right???

"Ah, ah, ah. With my kittens so desperate, I have no choice but to enter the shower with my clothes on. But that's okay because," Soonyoung smirks as he easily pulls his cock out, "I can just do this."

You gulp. It's even more mouth-watering than the quick image burnt in your brain from last week. He spits in his hand and starts with slow, steady strokes. A hiss escapes his mouth when his thumb rubs along the tip that's beginning to leak with pre-cum.

"You'd look so pretty for me, baby. That sorry excuse of a shirt clinging to your perfect tits, nipples poking through 'cause you're not wearing a bra underneath. Naughty," he pretends to scold but it's hardly believable with how far gone he suddenly is in this fantasy. Thick cock already hard. Dancer hips thrusting up to match the rhythm of his hand.

"Run a finger down where I know you're even wetter. But for a different reason. Hot pussy pressed against my thigh. Shit, you're prolly clenching, poor lil hole so desperate for my cock. Find out you're not wearing panties either. Shockers."

A whimper unwittingly leaves your mouth. You blame it on whatever pheromones he emitted in his room. The overwhelming scent of everything that is Soonyoung. You're drowning in it with no hope for recovery. The alignment of the planets and stars will face your wrath. Hell, even the man himself. It's part of the job but it feels like he's talking directly to you. About you.

He has to know you have no bra or panties on. He's the one who provided his clothes as a substitute.

Your back is damp with sweat and you can feel the heat of arousal pooling in your core. You force your entire body to stay rigidly still. Fuck. He's better at this than you thought.

"Shit," Soonyoung growls. His head is thrown back and you can't help but admire the vein running down it. "Rip off those tiny ass shorts and slide right into your sopping pussy. So fucking tight and wet wrapped around me. God, you'd take me in so deep wouldn't you? Stuff you nice and full, baby — just like you like it."

"Shit," you echo as the viewers rush to answer him with the yeses you're dying to admit. You feel lightheaded. "Goddamnit."

Would it be indecent to touch yourself? Right here in his bedroom? With only one wall separating you? You don't even dare to cross your legs. Trembling hands struggle to keep your phone stable because the low moans Soonyoung is making directly in your ear shoot straight down to your cunt and render your entire body shaky.

woolove: shirt offfffff

woolove: plssss

woolove: wanna touch u directly all over n mark u up

"That so, woolove?" He delays his approaching release by checking the comments. "Don't worry, kitten. I'm sure those lovely claws of yours will do their job properly no matter what I'm wearing. Just be careful when you're putting them inside that empty pussy of yours wishing it was me. Don't want you to get hurt."

NewUser89021: no promises daddy

"Yes, I'm your father," Soonyoung chuckles darkly before it suddenly changes into a light-hearted cackle. He shifts a bit lower, the upper part of his face still hidden. Legs spread wide, granting an even better view of his cock that flops against his covered abdomen. "Kidding, welcome new kittens — just call me Hoshi. I like the sound of you moaning that better."

hoshis_d1ck: hoshi dick supremacy ftwww

t1ge3r_rat: what the actual fuck??

cumdaywh0ring: r we nutting anytime soon?????? i've got plans at 8

He clicks his tongue and resumes light, teasing touches along his length. "Impatient, aren't we? I hope you're touching yourselves at home or I'll have to punish you by dragging this out. So go on, pretty pussycats. Make your tiger cum."

Oh no.

You flip on your side, fearing the sweat and dampness you're sure is now coating your friend's boxers might accidentally leave traces on his comforter. Dread fills your gut when Soonyoung reaches for his phone again, despite the influx of viewers begging for him to breed them. Whether his intentions are to add to the suspense or bother you again, you rush to add a plea to the mix.

t1ge3r_rat: pls pls cum for us

No one except Soonyoung knows what causes the satisfied smirk on his face for him to lean back again but they can definitely see it as he quickens his pace, filthy words spilling out of his lips.

"Gonna let me cum in that dirty hole of yours, baby? Take you right out of the shower and throw you on the bed, fill you up so you walk around feeling me drip out of your pussy for days. Just for you to come and beg for more like the good cumslut you are."

dickarawrous420: hot

woolove: omgkfjdks i'm so close fjddfj pls fill me up

s0turned0n: 🔥🔥🔥🎆🎇🎆🎇🎆🎇💥💥💥

Fickle fingers toy with your waistband. What if… just what if… one little…

"I'd give it to you, baby. Hell, I'd do anything you wanted. You'd like that, huh? Being treated like you deserve. And I would… shit… you'd be so perfect for me. Made for just for me… fuck!"

Your hand snaps away from your lower body at Soonyoung's sudden increase in expletives as he finally loses control. You can only watch in awe as white spurts of his release spill out over his cute, tiny hands that continue jerking himself through the orgasm.

"Hah," he gasps out his legendary tagline, "horanghae, baby."

h0rny49yu: ur so sexci omfg

8starfucks: delicious

wh0ranghae: i think i came the hardest in my life ever

NewUser22234: so hot i think i'm in love

Jejusb00s: i put the sub in subscribed

"I think… that's the hardest I've ever cum too," Soonyoung admits almost bashfully. "Don't fall in love with me kittens, this is one tiger that's impossible to tame."

woolove: wounds me every time 😭😭😭😭

"Sorry, you know how this goes. But, all of you have been so well-behaved for me, it's only fair I reward as promised."

He giggles and in one smooth motion finally pulls the t-shirt off, displaying honey-colored skin that's dewy from exertion. Using it to clean himself up, it's quickly discarded, thrown off to the side. You gulp at the display of his lean pecs rising up and down from his harsh pants and the two veins trailing from his abs, down his pelvis, and surely up and around…

Soonyoung smirks back at the camera, grasping at his cock again. "Ready for a couple more bonus rounds then, kittens?"

This was all a goddamn mistake.

You're cursing your best friend under your breath, having been muttering dark nonsense for the past day and a half.

Technically, it's also your fault for getting stupid feelings but you deny all cases of accountability. Fuzzy feelings aside, you hold zero responsibility for Soonyoung having a nice lower package too.

Fuck. Your hands are shaking again. You set down the tube of lipstick and take a deep breath, giving the reflection in the mirror a firm, reprimanding look to not be so dick-drunk just as your phone rings.

Speak of the devil.

You have no other choice but to accept his video call because it's D-day. Although your hands are occupied at the moment, so he'll have to accept looking at the constellations lit across your ceiling instead.

"Hi! Huh? Hello? Are you there?"

"Hi, Soonyoung. I'm getting ready."

"Are you nervous?"

"Why would I be, this isn't my first show," you say more to yourself than to him.

"Your star projector's on."

"And? I always put it on before I start. It calms me down."

"That's cute."

You freeze at his words and then shake your head, clipping your earrings in place. It wasn't like he was calling you cute. You hate that all the effort you've put into shielding your feelings is easily cracked apart after seeing his dick. Pathetic.

"By the way, you did get the transfer right?"

"Yeah, I already told you."

"I know but I just wanted to check. With a sum that large, who knows where it might go… you haven't talked to me since."

"I answered all your texts."

"Yeah, but what if someone hacked your phone? Like even now, I could be talking to an evil person imitating your voice."

You sigh, lifting up the phone to show him your face. He smiles brightly and snickers at your frown. "See? It's me."

"I suppose so. Unless you're an imposter Hoon hired."

After trying and failing to sleep, you walked out to see Soonyoung's roommate sipping on his cup of black coffee at some gremlin-only hour. It was unusual for him to return at this time just as it was rare for you to be up. But with Soonyoung snoring away in Jihoon's room, all you could do was apologize.

He brushed it off, saying there was no need, and instead, inquired why you were awake. You confessed to wanting to go home but your car broke down. He happened to be headed back out for reasons you didn't pry and offered a ride. One you gladly accepted — with the promise to meet for lunch sometime with his new girlfriend — all of which was much to Soonyoung's chagrin.

It's true that you hadn't talked to your bestie directly but you had given brief responses to his incessant messaging. It was easy to blame your aloofness on being busy. Which you were — catching up on assignments, sleeping, and preparing for your next stream.

"Jihoon brought me back safely of course and you didn't have to give me all of that," you whisper, voice small. "It's too much."

"I told you I would and that was probably my best show ever." He wiggles in excitement although you don't see it because you placed your phone back down. "I'm looking forward to what we'll make together. And I'm looking even more forward to tonight."

"Oh, shut up," you complain, embarrassed, "apparently you've already watched me before."

"Yeah but this is different. 'Cause now you know I'll be watching."

And that was the worst part.

You didn't mention that maybe — just maybe — you binged almost all of his videos uploaded to Svthub. Perhaps to simply fight the incessant heat that hasn't stopped boiling in your core since that night. Possibly another big mistake on your end, a constant mind loop of Soonyoung's obscene whispers now playing in your head.

To salvage what's left of whatever pride you have remaining, you pick your phone up to face him. "What's in your spank bank?"

"Huh?"

"Y'know, like… what gets you going, what you picture in your head? Oh — what're you listening to? I noticed you sometimes wear earbuds."

He tilts his head. "Have you been… watching my videos? You're asking… what gets my dick hard? Is that why you haven't been talking to me?"

Your finger points accusingly at the screen. "You told me to do my research."

Soonyoung laughs nervously, suddenly flustered as he combs his silver locks back with both hands. "I, uh, guess I'm honored. Well, what did you think? Any good?"

"... You didn't answer my question."

"Um, well. I don't know why you want to know but whatever. It's just some… audio porn…?"

"Cool. Send me a few links later."

"Why?" he sputters at your nonchalant request. Shit, he should've just said music.

"Just going off what you said about "learning each other's kinks" or whatnot."

Soonyoung chews on his bottom lip. "... Alright. Remember, you asked for it."

"I'm really trusting that you aren't going to send me some extreme furry sex, so don't break the little amount of faith I have in you because that smile's making me reconsider."

"Nah, just think this is all very cute. Seriously. I'm excited for tonight. See you on Svthub in a few?"

You roll your eyes as you blow him a cheeky kiss and a very dignified middle finger. "See you, original tiger boy."

TigerLily_61596 is now live!

The recording light blinks from the webcam as you clear your throat. Viewers are already tuning in and the chime of tips being applied to your account rapidly increases even if all you're doing is sitting on your bed. It's a reminder that by no means are you an amateur to this despite the butterflies swirling in your tummy.

"Evenin', darlings," you lean forward with your chest squeezed flatteringly between your arms, cleavage on full display. "How're you all doing?"

tigressb00bl0v3r: seeing ur boobs always makes my day a whole lot better 🙏🏻

deathbyd1cks: bbygorl ur tits look so good in that set 😏

crazy4w00: sit on my face pls 😖💦

"Thank you for the compliments." Your hands rise from your lap to play with the bra straps that cause your breasts to jiggle tantalizingly. "A special thank you to deathbyd1cks for the pretty lingerie, it does look good on me."

The best part about camming was the sexy little gifts you received. Of course, they were delivered to a PO box several cities away so it took a bit of time to get to you, but you have yet to be disappointed. Plus, they made your shows all the more delicious — especially when your viewers hungrily got to watch you take off or use something they had bought for you.

Your hands don't leave your upper body, instead drifting down to fondle your tits. Playing with your nipples through the flimsy orange and black material, you continue reading the comments.

kitkat69: getting u something sexci for your next show <3

sugacub3s: would treat u so good if u rode my thigh bby

"I look forward to it, darling kitkat69! But please, save your money if you need it. Don't spend it on me… especially if I'm being bad." Your appreciative smile turns into a smirk. "Crazy4w00 and sugacub3s, I appreciate your offers but I really need something inside me. Big and thick." You pout. "The pillow I've been riding lately just hasn't been enough."

You can't help but admit the truth. Even your fingers reaching deep within weren't enough to scratch such an intense desire but you still needed them for what you had planned tonight. Wondering if Soonyoung had tuned in, you bite your lip at the wetness that soaks your panties at just the thought of him watching.

You're quick to strip out of the lingerie, not that it was really hiding anything — making sure to show the camera the string of arousal that drips from your cunt to the fabric as you discard the set on the bedroom floor. A tiny tiger lily tattoo (per your username and profile) is on full display, ink prettily scrawled along your hip crease. The viewers eat it up, the sound of tips becoming one long blaring ring of appreciation.

Your pointer and middle finger spread your hole open, seductively showing how it struggles to clench around something. Anything.

"How many fingers, loves? How many do you think this needy pussy can take?"

deathbyd1cks: all of them tbh

sugacub3s: mine would fit in there so well put in 2 baby girl and pretend it's me

whore_that_roars: put in 1 that's all u deserve rn

crazy4w00: lich rally sit on my face my tongue will make u cum faster 😜

beg4u: ✌🏻✌🏻✌🏻✌🏻

beg4u: that means 2 btw

No one can see you roll your eyes although you do bite your lip. Your cheeks heat up ten times more than they already are as you ease just one finger in per who you assume can only be Soonyoung. Fuck. You let out a moan.

"Am feeling so tight, need to loosen up." You're sure the mic can pick up the light breaths that escape your mouth as you stroke the bundle of nerves inside, thumb circling your clit. "Can I add another? Pretty please?"

sugacub3s: hell yeah

whore_that_roars: no

whore_that_roars: i don't remember giving u permission to touch that cute clit of urs

whore_that_roars: so be patient

m3rs: sexci

beg4u: 👊🏻👊🏻 who are you to run this show

deathbyd1cks: lolol

kitkat69: she's being so good tho i vote yes

whore_that_roars: fine. add 2 more

beg4u: 🙄 yeah pls

You pause and lick your fingers to lubricate them with your saliva, a contemplative hum at the bitterness on your tongue. "Bet you all wish you could taste me, huh?"

crazy4w00: that's what i've been saying!!!! ik you taste soooo good 💧💧💧

whore_that_roars: is that a promise??

beg4u: 😒 lich rally who even is this rando

whore_that_roars: she said be nice. i'll remember you svthub user beg4u 👁️

"C'mon, don't fight." Three fingers slide into your pulsating warmth and you throw your head back in pleasure at the slight burn before grabbing the vibrator on your nightstand. "I need to cum at least once to fit this bad boy in."

deathbyd1cks: oh it's that kind of night 😏🤭

crazy4w00: 👅 tasty

kingh0ng: shit i'm late

kingh0ng: but i didn't miss the good stuff fuck yeah

"Oh, we're just getting started, kingh0ng. So? Am I allowed to make myself cum?"

sugacub3s: hell yeahhhhh

beg4u: 💣💣💣💣

whore_that_roars: do it baby

kingh0ng: got my dick out we're all good to go

Fingers pick up speed, porn-worthy wet sounds filling the room. It doesn't take you long to hurdle over that edge, pinching and pulling at your nipples. Shivers trail up and down your spine when you picture Soonyoung's intense gaze, wondering if his tiny fingers would be able to reach even as far as yours. Not that it matters because the visual of him in your head is enough for another gush of arousal to leak from your trembling cunt.

"God, I'm so wet," you murmur more to yourself because your viewers can clearly see the traces on your thighs. "Shit."

crazy4w00: i'd lick it all up

kingh0ng: i can't cum yet there's more right??

whore_that_roars: will u squirt for me baby? i KNOW you can

"Grab onto your straps, babygirls. Any of you boys as big and thick as this?"

The silver and glittery, microphone-shaped vibrator shines under the dim fairylights of your bedroom. It jitters to life when you press the 'on' button, flinching at its intensity.

deathbyd1cks: perfect 👌🏼

tigressb00bl0v3r: omfggg yessss

beg4u: i can't vibrate like that 😢

whore_that_roars: i can certainly try

beg4u: lichrally fighting user whore_that_roars after this

Ignoring the chaos in the comments, you bite your lip. It's one of your biggest toys and possibly bigger than any man's cock, in all honesty. You're sure it might be as thick as Soonyoung but what would you know. Gifted by a dedicated fan, you feel your entire body jerk as you tease your tight hole with it.

Despite loosening up, it's still going to be a hard fit. One hand falls to your bed to prevent your body from collapsing as you continue rubbing it along the outer lips of your pussy and clit. Finally, with an unholy whine, you ease it inside.

kitkat69: shit

sugacub3s: o my fuck

whore_that_roars: baby did you just cum from THAT?

m3rs: cute

beg4u: i just 😵👁️👁💦🧨🎇🎆

tigressb00bl0v3r: fuck ur so hot

deathbyd1cks: delicious bbygirl

kingh0ng: i thk i blcked out

You laugh weakly between moans, unable to form words. Despite indeed having just cum from the sensations alone, the vibrator continues at full speed — your hips stuttering helplessly as you struggle to grip it in your hand. The depraved picture of debauchery as a trail of drool drips from your mouth.

But you still need more.

Feeling like you're floating in the clouds and extremely ightheaded, your body has a mind of its own. A few more slight wiggles and your eyes are rolling back as the loudest moan you've ever made comes from the very depths of your soul.

whore_that_roars: shit

whore_that_roars: fuck

whore_that_roars: squirt for me baby

beg4u: squirt for US*

crazy4w00: 💦💦💦💦💧💧💧💧

And you do.

Ripping the sex toy from between your legs, an absolute wet mess gushes out of your spent cunt all over your bedsheets. Legs shaking, you clamp down on your hand to prevent the name lingering in your subconscious from escaping as the last streams of your release drip down your thighs. Tears are blurring your vision and you sniffle, slowly coming back to earth.

deathbyd1cks: u good tigress????

kingh0ng: i think my dick fell off fr that was hot af

kingh0ng: but yeah, u good?

whore_that_roars: talk to us love

beg4u: square up whore_that_roars

beg4u: hope you're alive tho miss tigress cuz I'm not

kitkat69: LICH rally tigress is always an icon

"I'm… I'm good." You confirm and give them a thumbs-up, panting but smiling lopsidedly. "I… I hope you enjoyed that and thank you for the tips. I'm gonna go… clean up. Catch you later, darlings."

Once you've confirmed that you've turned off the recording and your computer is shut off, you collapse on your bed. Feeling woozy and sluggish, an arm flops across your closed eyes. This was by no means the first time Soonyoung has been in your thoughts during a livestream. Even now after all that, you feel yourself clench instinctively, the feeling blossoming even more because he had been watching you. Talking to you. Commanding you.

Fuck.

You're afraid that once you get a real taste of him you won't be able to let him go. Ever. You'll want him more than he wants you and you're not sure if you can handle that.

But this collaboration is happening. You might as well get the chance to fuck him once in your life than never at all.

Tears wash away in the shower, disappearing down the drain. For the hundredth time, you push down your feelings and let the warm water soothe away the aches and pains instead. Self-care is a must. Fluffy towels dry away the moisture, lotion to keep your skin smooth, and comfy granny pajamas to curl up under your clean bedsheets. Time for a good wallow in your feels.

Your phone lays uncharged on your nightstand and you pick it up, blinking at the several messages from none other than Soonyoung. Dread fills your gut momentarily before opening them, only to gasp in shock at what you read.

God, you were screwed... weren't you?

◇ Part 2

onlyseokmins: September 2022 ©

#E L V #I'm so glad I'm reading this now and part 2 is already out because how fucking dare you end it here hello???????????#also not you dragging hoshi's hands throughout this 😭😭😭 leave my man alone #i don't know if i was more clenched reading reader watching him and getting riled up or her putting on a show #almost bit into my pillow so thanks for that #please hoshi is so annoying and a loser not horang-hey 💀💀💀💀💀 throwing tomatoes at him actually #but I'd still fuck him so i don't know what that says about me #en ee ways #please you're so funny #the number of times i exhaled very loudly while reading this 💀💀💀#idiots to lovers is honestly just your trope at this point #you write it so well #also personally my ego would become obnoxious if i knew kwon Soonyoung was jerking it to me 🤷🏾‍♀️#yeah maybe I'm in my hoshi feelings a little what about it #and this definitely didn't help #also love that you let me feature in this fic even though I'm sure we weren't mutuals when you posted this #I'm cherryscouper_95 btw /j #i....will not be unpacking my feelings about hoshi and a daddy kink thanks #happy father's day to him too i guess #also not the girlies fighting in Reader's chat please 💀💀💀😭😭😭#so hyped to get to part two because what the fuck ma'am #elv <3 #hoshi smut #kwon soonyoung smut #seventeen smut #soonyoung smut

2K notes · View notes

sheeezu · 4 months ago

Text

Yes, this is a new account, I just made this. I don't care if people question the authenticity of my post, my experience as a shifter, or whatever I'm about to say.

I don't know how to use Tumblr, nor do I know how to make my post reach people who need it, nor would I be a narcissist and say "you're lucky if you found my post!" I don't mind if this reaches an audience or not, I'm glad to get everything off my chest.

Yes. I've shifted.

I have shifted realities, more times than I can count on my fingers, and that is for a very specific reason, which I'll explain later.

I'm writing this because I'm about to permashift, and no, I won't hear out any antishifters or people who don't like permashifting in general, I don't care about your opinion so don't waste my time.

Before I start, I'd like to say one thing:

I was irrational minded, I lacked belief in myself and shifting. Shifting often times felt like a chore more than a fun activity, and i have to admit, it became an unhealthy habit.

So? Why did I mention this?

Because I had been lurking around shifting communities and I realised everyone feels like this, a very (mentally) painful feeling where the lack of shifts starts acting as your biggest enemy, and the phrase:

"Shifting needs practice!"

Sounds like poison when it comes from an experienced shifter.

Though, is the phrase actually true?

No, not at all.

Shifting does not need practice!!

Here's why:

(BTW, I will explain my "method", no matter if I have time or not. Also, I don't call this reality "Current Reality", instead I call it Void reality, so don't get confused.)

The "practice" you're doing is only affecting your void reality (taking time out of your day, making you constantly think you're in your learning phase, so it doesn't exactly lead to your desired reality, does it?)

Of course, if you view it as a skill, it will in some way act like that, it'll become a skill for you, and you can never succeed on your first, second, third, hundredth try, because in your brain you have registered the fact that shifting is this grand, universal task, and that it is very difficult (because its common sense that you practice difficult things to get good at them)

Practice is a very humane and earthly act, if people have succeeded doing just practice, then good for then, they're right in their own way, but it didn't work for me, and in my opinion it's the worst way to view shifting, and often times it is demotivating, and you'll mess up you're entire journey.

Shifting is not a skill, shifting is a universal law.

I'll become more clear as I explain my journey:

My journey:

I found shifting from a random YouTube video 3 years ago. I might have only said cool and moved along.

A year later something traumatic happened in my life, which shook me so badly I needed an escape.

First of all, I chose astral projecting, but I realised I was too much of a coward to do so.

Then I came towards shifting, first DR was very typical, it was Hogwarts.

Having no knowledge whatsoever in the topics of spirituality, meditation, I went straight to methods, because they were like guides for me, I was very inexperienced, of course, and looked at other people and what they were doing for guidance.

Alice in wonderland method didn't do much, raven method was too uncomfortable (side note, all this raven method does is make you too focused on your void reality, cmon, in your DR are you laying down like a starfish?) And I was having terrible trouble with my intrusive thoughts (which made the floor disappear from under my feet, made the stairs for the stairs method too short to climb or straight up made them dissappear as well)

I didn't have any luck that year, no mini shifts, no lucid dreams, or sleep paralysis. And my DRs never remained constant. They always changed on a daily basis.

I was big on methods, I couldn't realize they never worked for me.

Although, this year of failure led me to finally figure out where I belonged.

A DR made out of scratch, which I spend much effort in putting the pieces of it together.

The DR, which was called "Home reality" really made me feel settled in my journey.

LOA, and the consciousness theory were the leading factors which made me shift.

And don't worry, it isn't what you're tired of being told, I didn't just apply any orthodox definition of LOA and succeeded.

Background to my first shift:

It was a particularly stressful day, I really missed my home.

I was studying at my college (I still am, but...) and I was dreading giving a chemistry test, I did not prepare. In my mind, one thing was constantly looping in my head.

The scenario of the chemistry teacher coming in, and taking the test, and the next day I get it handed back with a big fat zero.

But then I stopped and wondered, having already known about the consciousness theory, so according to it:

"I am constantly letting this thought run in my mind, and constantly letting this reality dictate what happens next."

Basically, I realized what was about to happen next was indirectly in my control, but with my line of thinking, I was letting this reality control it directly.

I stopped, like actually stopped thinking.

And with a blank mind I thought.

"I won't have to take any test today."

And went around telling my classmates this with a confident tone.

The teacher came in, said we'll instead do some practicals in lab.

So the test got cancelled.

Going home, I got excited, i felt powerful.

I decided to apply this to shifting.

Before shifting, I took a nap during the day, (if you're tired your body insists on sleeping, so your mind will get hazy and you will start acting lazy towards your goal)

And after living how I normally would, before bedtime, I listened to some songs, and look at a Pinterest board which reminded me of my home reality.

My method and what happened next:

First phase of shifting:

When I laid down on the bed to start shifting, I first got comfy (for me, if I feel sleepy for some reason, I laid on my back, I can't fall asleep in that position, but if I think ill stay awake until I reach a "detached state" then I sleep on my side, it's comfortable)

I obviously wasn't checking the time, but I spent about 10 minutes getting relaxed, all I do to relax is:

a) look at the blackness (closed eyes, looks like starry skies) and try to believe I'm looking at the milky way.

b) think about my home reality, just faces of my loved ones, and nostalgia inducing images.

c) Affirm, but don't focus entirely on affirming, usually in the back of my mind I'm repeating "I have shifted to my home reality" "I have shifted my senses to my home reality" "I have stopped sensing the void reality" "I am smelling, tasting, feeling, hearing and seeing my home reality" no other fancy affirmations required. (Now that I think about it, you need to affirm NOW because this method has two phases, one where you are shifting, and one where you have shifted, and you are in the 3D, where you are occupying your DR self, their thoughts, and memories, and popular method usually only have one phase, either you are shifting, or have shifted. So my point is if you affirm later and you'll be affirming when you're supposed to be in your DR, and obviously, your DR self won't be spouting out affirmations about shifting to a random reality for no reason.)

During this time, you'll feel tingly all over. It's a good sign.

And you'll feel a certain detachment, like you aren't exactly here, you have no idea what position you're lying in, and where your feet are. (Please, for the love of God do not start counting your feet or get freaked out that you can't feel your leg, you'll come back to the void reality.)

So you can start the next phase.

Middle phase (optional):

To prepare for the next and last phase, you can do this to get ready, or don't (First read the third phase)

This is all about connection to your DR.

Think about memories from your DR, focus on the faces of your loved ones, the way you act, talk, your mannerisms in your DR, or you can simply say affirmations like these one:

My name is ___.

I work as a ___.

My age is ___.

Don't try to imagine vividly or anything, lightly touch upon the basic details of your DR, the construction and foundation of any reality and the person, who has existed there for their entire life.

(That's you!)

Phase three:

Take a sudden, abrupt stop from your stream of thoughts. (Yes intrusive thoughts will still pop up but don't give any importance to them) when you're in a blank state of mind, not longer than 30 seconds, you need to build up to the last step of your shifting method, and journey.

a) start imagining hearing the voices of your loved ones or just any voice, calling your DR name, your nicknames, with different tones. (For example, i heard my name in an angry tone from my father when he was scolding me, I heard my name followed by a laughter when my S/O teased me.)

OK, for me, I started feeling intense, groundshaking symptoms at this moment. Sudden flashing of lights, extreme feeling of floating, and ofcourse, feeling tingliness so much that it felt like pins and needle on my entire body. (I did ignore the symptoms)

b) plan the rest of your day in your DR, which you will be spending.

AGAIN, PLEASE DON'T SAY IT LIKE THIS.

❌️When I reach my DR ❌️ I will have to go to that eye specialist for that appointment.

Instead: (and the more you personalize it, the better)

Ughhh, I have to go to that appointment- this day will suck.

(Don't mind my example, that was the only thing I could think of at the moment)

c) in this reality, you are constantly thinking of something, your thoughts are definitely what constructs this reality, and your current thoughts are affecting your subconscious. (By this point, your subconscious is grounded in your DR, so don't worry about that bastard.)

Now, you're going to start thinking, thoughts which are going on in your DR self's mind, start with one sentence, with which you'll be able to start consciously thinking like your DR self.

And think in the style, tone, and mood of your DR self, and keep the thoughts strictly related to your DR.

Thats it, but what happens afterwards? And what happened to me?

So for me, I started feeling weird while I was thinking.

And I remember I thought this:

"Ugh, I don't want eggs for breakfast."

(I'm not saying this is the key to shifting, at this point, I had covered various topics, including, weather, my upcoming work assignment, and praised my S/O for a good 5 minutes.)

And I started panting, like suddenly I was trying to catch my breath, the room felt bright, so I opened my eyes, and well, I was in my home reality :)

I was delirious for a few second, my S/O was looking at me worriedly, but surprisingly, it didn't even take me a minute to adjust, it felt all so natural and I wasn't scared.

I didn't even feel emotional, at all, and didn't hug my S/O with tears in my eyes, I straight up asked to be served breakfast, incase anyone was wondering.

So that's it.

Although i have much to say, I'm tired of writing, but I'm more than willing to answer each and every one of your questions, although I only have 7 hours left till I permashift, I'll remain mostly active till then.

And no, I'm not rereading this to fix my grammar, so just ask if anything confused you.

Ask away.

I'm still not sure if this'll reach anyone or not.

#shifting community #reality shifting #shifting motivation #shifting blog #shifting antis dni #shifting #shiftblr #shifters #permashifting #respawning #shifting methods #shifting stories #shifting success

6K notes · View notes

deansbeer · 7 months ago

Text

a quiet kind of forever ・ VHACKER. ៸៸៸ 𝐍𝐀𝐕𝐈𝐆𝐀𝐓𝐈𝐎𝐍 ! ♡ pinned library

SYNOPSIS. morning cuddles with a shirtless vinnie in his parents' backyard patio? yeah, you're definitely living the dream. his strong taut arms. seattle mornings. whispered confessions. a love story told in soft kisses and the scent of pine.

WARNING(S). fluff | kissing | fem!reader | domestic fluff | established relationship.

KARI NOTES. i haven't written for him in what feels like ages. i genuinely feel so bad. anyway! so this cute lil fic idea was based off this TIKTOK of him && poncho. i can't stress enough how good he looks. this was kept on repeat btw.

the morning sun filters through the trees surrounding vinnie's parents' home in seattle, casting dappled shadows across the back patio. you're wrapped in vinnie's arms, your body pressed against his as you both stand outside, enjoying the crisp air and each other's company.

vinnie's wearing black baggy sweatpants that hang low on his hips, showcasing the perfect v-line of his abdomen. he's shirtless, his tattooed skin on full display in the soft morning light. his black fitted cap sits backwards on his head, a few strands of curls peeking out from underneath. you can't help but admire how effortlessly handsome he looks, even in his casual attire.

your outfit is equally relaxed - a black cropped tank top that reveals a sliver of your midriff, paired with light gray baggy sweatpants and white socks. your hair is clipped back messily, still tousled from sleep. it's clear you both just rolled out of bed, drawn outside by the beautiful morning and the desire to be close to one another.

your hands rest loosely around vinnie's bare torso, fingers tracing idle patterns on his warm skin. his own hands are settled on your lower back, thumbs rubbing small circles just above the waistband of your sweatpants. the touch is gentle, almost absent-minded, but it sends little shivers of pleasure up your spine.

vinnie dips his head to the side, pressing a soft kiss to your hair. his lips trail down to your ear, where he nips playfully at your earlobe. you can feel his warm breath against your skin as he whispers, "you're so beautiful in the morning, you know that?"

you can't help the smile that spreads across your face, burying your chin deeper into his shoulder to hide your flushed cheeks. "shut up," you murmur, but there's no real protest in your voice.

he chuckles, the sound low and rumbling in his chest. "nah," he replies, placing another kiss just below your ear. "i love seeing you like this - all soft and sleepy and mine."

your heart swells at his words, and you press a kiss to his bare shoulder. your lips linger on his skin, savoring the warmth. "i love being here with you," you admit softly. "seeing where you grew up, meeting your family... it feels all so special."

vinnie's arms tighten around you, pulling you even closer. "it is special," he agrees. "having you here, in my hometown... it's like two parts of my world coming together."

you lift your head to meet his gaze, struck by the sincerity in his eyes. sometimes it still amazes you how this boy, who seems so confident and carefree to the rest of the world, can be so vulnerable and open with you.

"i'm glad i'm here," you tell him, reaching up to cup his cheek. your thumb brushes over the light stubble on his chin, and he leans into your touch.

vinnie turns his head to press a kiss to your palm, then grins mischievously. "me too. although, i gotta say, i'm a little worried about leaving you alone with my mom. who knows what embarrassing stories she'll tell you."

you laugh, shaking your head. "oh, i'm counting on those stories. i need all the dirt i can get on little vinnie hacker."

he groans dramatically, but the smile never leaves his face. "i knew this was a mistake. you and my mom are going to team up against me, aren't you?"

"absolutely," you confirm with a nod. "it's my solemn duty as your girlfriend to collect as many embarrassing childhood stories as possible."

vinnie's eyes soften at the word 'girlfriend', and he leans in to capture your lips in a sweet kiss. when he pulls back, he's smiling that smile that never fails to make your heart skip a beat. "well, as long as you still like me after hearing all those stories, i guess i can't complain too much."

you pretend to consider this, tapping your chin thoughtfully. "hmm, i don't know. what if i find out you were, like, a total goof in middle school? that might be a deal-breaker."

vinnie laughs, the sound echoing in the quiet morning air. "baby, i hate to break it to you, but i was definitely a goof in middle school. probably still am, if we're being honest."

you grin, sliding your hands up his back to rest on his shoulder blades. the movement brings your bodies even closer together, and you feel vinnie's breath hitch slightly. "good thing i like goofs, then," you tease.

vinnie's eyes darken a bit as he looks at you, his gaze dropping to your lips. "oh yeah? how much do you like them?"

you lean in, your lips barely brushing against his as you speak. "why don't you find out?"

before you can close the distance, vinnie suddenly spins you around, pulling your back against his chest. his arms wrap around your waist, and he rests his chin on your shoulder. "nuh-uh," he says, his voice playful. "you can't distract me that easily. we're out here to enjoy the morning, remember?"

you laugh, leaning back into his embrace. "fine, fine. i guess the view is pretty nice."

and it is. from the back patio, you can see the lush green of the surrounding trees, their leaves rustling gently in the morning breeze. the sky is a clear, pale blue, with just a few wispy clouds drifting lazily overhead. it's peaceful in a way that's different from the constant buzz of activity you're used to in california.

vinnie hums in agreement, his chest vibrating against your back. "it is," he says, "but i think my view is better."

you roll your eyes, even though he can't see it. "that was cheesy, even for you."

"you love it," he retorts, and you can hear the grin in his voice.

you don't bother denying it, because you both know it's true. instead, you lean your head back against his shoulder, closing your eyes and just breathing in the moment. the fresh morning air, the warmth of vinnie's body against yours, the quiet chirping of birds in the distance — it all combines to create a perfect, peaceful bubble that you wish you could stay in forever.

vinnie seems to be thinking along the same lines. "we should do this more often," he murmurs, his lips brushing against your ear. "just... be together. no phones, no cameras, no schedules. just us."

you nod, reaching down to lace your fingers with his where they rest on your stomach. "i'd like that," you agree softly. "although i'm not sure how we'd manage it with your crazy schedule."

he sighs, nuzzling into your neck. "we'll figure it out," he says with determination. "i'll make time. you're worth it."

your heart swells with affection, and you turn in his arms to face him again. "you're a pretty awesome boyfriend," you tell him, your hands coming to rest on his chest.

vinnie grins, that cocky, charming smile that first caught your attention all those months ago. "i know," he says with a wink.

you laugh, shaking your head at his antics. "and goofy, too," you tease.

"the goofiest," he agrees solemnly, before breaking into another grin.

you can't resist anymore. you rise up on your toes, pressing your lips to his in a soft, sweet kiss. vinnie responds immediately, one hand coming up to cradle the side of your neck as he deepens the kiss.

when you finally pull apart, you're both a little breathless. vinnie rests his forehead against yours, his eyes closed and a content smile on his face. "i love you," he whispers, so quietly you almost miss it.

your heart skips a beat. it's not the first time he's said it, but it still sends a thrill through you every time. "i love you too," you whisper back, your fingers tracing the lines of the snake tattoo over his collarbone and neck.

vinnie opens his eyes, meeting your gaze with so much warmth and affection that it almost overwhelms you. "yeah?" he says, his voice soft and a little awed, as if he still can't quite believe it.

"yeah," you confirm, smiling up at him. "always."

he kisses you again, slow and deep, pouring all his feelings into it. when you break apart this time, you're both grinning like idiots.

"come on," vinnie says, taking your hand. "let's go inside. i think i smell mom making pancakes."

as you follow him back into the house, your hand in his, you can't help but feel grateful for this moment - for the chance to see this side of vinnie, to be a part of his world in a way that feels so intimate and so real. you know that moments like these — quiet, perfect, and filled with love — will always be worth it.

2K notes · View notes

planetpiastri · 1 year ago

Text

pairing: lando norris x fem!reader [no faceclaim, reader is faceless] summary: yn and lando are couple goals around the mclaren garage, but they don't want oscar to feel left out. the problem? oscar would very much like to be left out. notes: school has finally released me from its chokehold so i'm doing my part in filling the winter break void. part 2 of my logan smau is in the works, but in the meantime, here's this<3 enjoy!

liked by landonorris, mclaren, and others

ynusername recent stuff (following my two favorite boys around like a stray puppy)

view all 1,659 comments

mclaren Always a pleasure to have you in the garage! 🧡

landonorris nyoom

ynusername vroom, even

username1 always a good day when yn refers to lando and oscar as her favorite boys

oscarpiastri Thanks for buying me dinner 👍🏻

ynusername you're welcome kiddo 🫶 oscarpiastri Please don't call me that

mclaren

liked by landonorris, ynusername, and 211,329 others

mclaren pookie #1 and pookie #2 dump (📸 - ynusername)

view all 3,789 comments

username2 WHO PUT THE ADMIN UP TO THIS

oscarpiastri Why would you say that

username3 im cackling this had to be yn's idea

landonorris pookie and proud 💪

username4 everyone say thank you yn for taking cute pics of our boys

ynusername you're welcome 😁

ynusername

liked by carlossainz55, landonorris, and others

ynusername let! him! cook!!!!!

view all 1,802 comments

username5 oh my god that is so much fire

oscarpiastri Do NOT let him cook I repeat do NOT let him cook

landonorris it was fine you big baby nobody got hurt 🙄 oscarpiastri I'd sure hope so??

username6 yn and lando are kind of unhinged together omg

username7 and that's why we love them 😌

mclaren Please bring our driver back to the paddock in one piece! 😬

landonorris all that fire and you were still the hottest thing in the kitchen 🥵🥵

ynusername 🤭🤭

landonorris

liked by oscarpiastri, ynusername, and 738,899 others

landonorris actually can't think of a better way to spend this life 🤍

view all 6,038 comments

username8 CAPTION IM IN TEARS 😭😭

username9 where's my credit for sending you the video lando

landonorris how many times do i have to teach you this lesson old man?? 👊💪

maxverstappen1 Too sweet

ynusername you're my everything 💌

landonorris you ARE everything oscarpiastri And Lando's just Ken landonorris this guy gets it

maxfewtrell Happy for you or whatever

username10 glad to know i'm not the only one crying over that video of lando and yn

georgerussell63 Don't worry I am too alex_albon me too carlossainz55 Me three username11 yo??

username12 help there are so many drivers in the comments 💀

oscarpiastri

liked by logansargeant, ynusername, and 179,025 others

oscarpiastri Hanging out with Mum and Dad 👍🏻

view all 2,078 comments

landonorris she started crying when she saw this btw

oscarpiastri Sorry? landonorris don't be, it's the pregnancy hormones ynusername I AM NOT PREGNANT DELETE THIS BEFORE THE WAG PAGES START POSTING

username13 ok but does oscar need a step-sister i wanna be part of this family

ynusername love u kiddo 🥹🧡

username14 oscar liking this comment oh we've come so far from when he used to tell her to stop calling him that oscarpiastri I've stopped fighting it

tagging: @sonder-paradise hey girl<3

request: hiii, could you do a smau similar to ‘heart eyes’ but with lando and oscar is the suffering third wheel? -from anon

#lando norris #lando norris x reader #f1 #f1 smau #f1 social media au #f1 x reader #instagram au #f1 imagine #lando norris imagine #f1 instagram au #social media au #lando norris au #oscar piastri #saturn writes

3K notes · View notes

chaostudee · 3 months ago

Text

dancing with our hands tied, franco colapinto

summary : franco comes across y/n a small singer, songwriter online and it isn't long before the two strike up a friendship. little do they know their friendship will blossom into much more, and with a life in the public eye it is hard for the media not to catch on. fc : lexi jayde warnings : language, suggestive content. a/n : im so delulu that i acc think that franco will get the vcarb seat 😭 also rly long i apologize i always get so carried away i can'ttt

y/nusername just a girl and her guitar

like by alessirose, clairo, fangirltingz58 and 14,793 others.

user44 me core

username0 so fucking gorge

alessirose we don't give enough credit to our guitars

user99 this guitar doesn't know that you are a lyrical genuis

username my living legend 🙌🙌

user88 omggg lana reference i see you

francocolapinto austin 🇺🇲

liked by alexalbon, williamsracing, landonorris and 843,782 others.

user728 i love him sm already

username rly rly hope he's on the grid next year :)

f1fan what a cutie

username62 okay so we can all collectively agree that he is fine asfff

user00 yesssss

f1lover hopefully he can get points next week.

landonorris 🐐🐐

user89 lando knows what's up

messages between franco and lando

y/nusername

liked by alessirose, clairo, francocolapinto and 32,982 others.

clairo my gorgeous gorgeous girl

user728 i need her wardrobe so bad actually

username love her so bad

user62 my fav alwayssss

francocolapinto 😍😍

user738 SIR WHAT ARE U DOING HERE

username81 we need the hair routine because girl that volume is so insaneee

f1fan franco liking and commenting is so insane like whaaaaa

y/nusername felt pretty (btw my new song homesick comes out on friday)

liked by francocolapinto, lizzymcapline, alessirose and 27,201 others.

francocolapinto so beautiful

user HUH WHAT username82 francooo what are you doing here f1fan so the whole f1 community has just come here?? user99 yup pretty much 😭

user882 OMG NEW SONG WHAT

username91 FREAKING OUT

user00 ugh wish it was friday

user910 that bod 🔥🔥

messages between y/n and franco

y/nusername small show in ny next week !! tickets on sale now

》 OMG OMG I JUST BOUGHT THEM CAN'T WAIT

》 girl never sleeps (but we love it)

》 stopp they sold out in like 2 mins

》 crying in international fan

y/nusername had the best time 🫶

liked by alessirose, francocolapinto, laufey and 52,950 others.

user892 cryinggg because why are u acc the cutest

fangirl52 take me back 🫠

username the pcd is hitting hard rn

user22 love u smm !!

username55 you deserve this sm y/n you deserve all the love

y/nusername 💕💕

y/nusername i'm so glad you are all loving my new song 'homesick' love you all sm 💋💋

liked by francocolapinto, reneerapp, lizzymcalpine and 47,920 others.

username135 the famous lip pout we lovee

user52 i love homesick so bad i relate smm

username12 frrr like did y/n read my journal?!? y/nusername 😈

user89 love u too girl....BUT WHO'S THE BOY

f1fan franco i think user26 who?? f1fan he's an f1 driver he recently followed y/n and liked and commented on her posts and was at her show last week user26 omfggg

reneerapp girl whoo tfff is that

user92 off topic but those lillies are so gorge (the girls that get it get it)

williamsracing just a guy who loves mate

liked by francocolapinto, y/nusername, alexalbon and 253,821 others.

user727 TELL FRANCO I LOVE HIM

f1fan and this is why williams have the best admin 🤭

user882 me but with coffee

f1lover you're a real one

user23 the concentration on his face is killing me

francocolapinto tysm for all the love x

liked by williamsracing, lewishamilton, landonorris and 473,139 others.

lewishamilton well deserved you have a bright future ahead of you 💪

francocolapinto my goat

user45 we lysm franco

username yayyy he knows that we appreciate him

anon poor logan

user45 james vowles knew what was up when he signed franco

user13 bro is just living THAT life

messages between y/n and franco

y/nusername

liked by landonorris, francocolapinto, alessirose and 289,012 others.

alessirose pretty pretty girl ilysm i miss u !!

y/nusername stopp i miss u too <33

user62 OUR GIRL IS TAKEN

username90 omgg white roses so so cute

f1fan i would recognize those eyes anywhere

user12 girl release the album

fangirl45 she just gave us a song give her a second 😭

francocolapinto fav song atm ;)

liked by landonorris, y/nusername, lilymunihe and 478,561 others.

landonorris what a simp

user82 OMG THIS IS Y/N'S SONG

username72 omggg wait is franco soft launching y/n stop that is so adorbs

user45 real real real AND THOSE LINES SPECIFICALLY

fangirl67 yesss he's one of us

user00 thought daughter core

francocolapinto gq spain

liked by y/nusername, landonorris, yukitsunoda and 1,054,783 others.

y/nusername damn.

user my reaction exactly f1fan wait y/n is actually funny asf y/nusername why thank u

landonorris im shook

user72 driver by day model by night

username he lowkey cooked tho

user90 HIS STYLIST NEEDS A RAISE

f1lover don't look at me like that

user34 proof that all f1 drivers are fine asf

y/nusername

》 OMG

》 future f1 wag perhaps

》 did franco invite you?

》 WHAT IS GOING ON

》 oh they are soo dating

francocolapinto nice weekend 😉

liked by y/nusername, landonorris, maxverstappen and 924,419 others.

user82 FRANCO THE THIRD PIC

username boi whatttt

user71 it's so obvious that it's this y/n girl

username12 awww cuteee

f1fan if he's not on the grid next year i'll cry

user83 girl i hate to break it to you but....

user34 his smilee omg im melting

username1 ugh y/n is so lucky

y/nusername took a little break from the studio 🏎🏁

liked by francocolapinto, lilymunihe, reneerapp and 142,914 others.

user82 what !

username00 GUYS SHE'S LITERALLY A CERTIFIED WILLIAMS WAG LIKE SHE'S LITERALLY HANGING OUT WITH LILY TF

f1fan omgggg lily and y/n

username92 wait that pic of franco is so cute ☺️

f1lover aesthetic queen

username23 help not the 0.5 of lily 💀

francocolapinto forgot to mention 🔒❤️

liked by y/nusername, landonorris, charlesleclerc and 1,292,441 others.

landonorris mate you weren't even discreet about it 🤦‍♂️

user73 FINALLY

username cutiesss

f1fan we knewwww but thank god they made it official

username727 giggling and kicking my feet rn

y/nusername mwahh lysm baby 💋

francocolpinto come to my apartment and i'll show you how much i love u 😌 user72 i- landonorris we spoke about this NO WHORING ON THE MAIN username28 oh ! f1lover i'll just pretend i never saw this.....

alexalbon keeping this for a secret for so long was torture

user62 confirmed y/n is a princess

username56 if anyone hates on them I WILL FIGHT YOU

taglist⭑.ᐟ

@lottalove4evelyn

@mxryxmfooty

@sweetestgirlintown111

@hadidsworld

@llando4norris

@heavy-vettel

@nichmeddar

@love2readd

@seonghwaexile

@depressedriches

@janeh22

688 notes · View notes

dilf-docs · 2 months ago

Text

Hand To Heart (I'm Gonna Stay Faithful)

bfd!joel miller x younger!reader

summary: a pregnancy scare makes you realize just how deep you are in this.

warnings: 18+ (minors dni), age gap, smut, p. in v., pregnancy scare, fingering (WE GET IT U LIKE IT), bit of praise kink, humilliation kink, breeding kink (they're stupid and insane acc), dacryphilia, sex thru the looking glass (there's a mirror in reader's dorm), ANGST in capital, they're starting to catch the feels™ ur honor, hurt/comfort, plot thiccens, this people are clearly NOT in a good headspace btw idk we listen read and don't judge.

word count: 4,757 words

side note: everyone calling this joel nasty but thirsting after him too? was going to hold a trial over my citizens but yk... what the hell, sure! i too want nasty bfd!joel to ruin me: he can be my baby daddy who doesn't pay for child support of our 4 kids and we'd make way to bed for our 5th LET'S GO also spam time! but i also happen to write in wattpad, and got a pedro pascal social media fic going on :) it's on spanish tho, but if u speak the language and would like to tune in, u can read it here

part: prev | masterlist | next

It's a regular Tuesday when his phone rings at ten in the morning.

"Dad"

Joel gets up from his desk in a brash move, immediately picking up his daughter's worried tone. Tommy bursts inside, telling him to calm down, but all Joel can hear is the anxious beat in his chest.

"What's it, babygirl? You okay?" his throat tightens. "Talk to me"

There's silence before she answers, as if she's unsure to continue.

"It's not me" he feels his muscles relaxing, but then Sarah drops the bomb. "It's y/n"

Joel's heart beats with a different type of worry.

"What's wrong with her?" voice firm but emotionless.

It's almost summer again, and he's still seeing you. In a way, you had carved a space for yourself in his cold heart, so naturally, fear settles in. He'd never admit this things out loud, though.

"I don't know, dad" his daughter starts to rush the words out, panic evident on her voice. "She has locked herself in the bathroom and won't stop crying. I-I didn't know who else to call"

"Don't worry" but it sounds like he's trying to convince himself. "M' comin'. S'anyone else in there?"

There's a pause on the line before she answers.

"No"

He thinks of you. He'd seen you cry before, of course, but it'd been over silly childish stuff, like getting sent to bed early or not getting what you wanted for Christmas.

He thinks of you. Images of your pretty face, etched in pain, make his stomach drop. It isn't fair: your face was one destined to be happy for eternity, your smile so contagious Joel would sometimes find himself surrendering to your juvenile joy, his crow feet a little more notorious since you entered his life and carved your space on it by force; a light in the dark.

He just couldn't bear to see a mirror of his dullness on your face. It wasn't right.

"Stay put. I'll be there"

He tries not to think about your eyes drained of life. He tries not to think he's the cause. And then, he hangs.

As soon as Joel enters your dorm, your perfume is up his nostrils, providing him with a sense of relief he didn't know he needed. It was comforting and familiar, words that used to be hollow now carrying a knowing feeling that stung right on his chest.

"Dad" Sarah calls out, going for a hug. Joel embraces his daughter tightly while caressing her hair. "I'm so glad that you're here. I didn't know what to do"

"Breath in, babygirl. S'alright" he looks at your door, closed. Broken sobs can be heard, and his wounded heart feels like a heavy burden on his chest.

"My class starts in ten" Sarah speaks against the fabric of his flannel, "but I just couldn't leave her like this"

His daughter has a good heart. At least one of them did, anyway.

"Go to your class" he's commanding before he can fully process what he said.

Sarah breaks the hug, looking at him with a look he can't quite place.

"What? But, dad-" she tries to protest, concerned for your wellbeing.

"I'll take care of it. Always do, haven't I?" he sees her hesitation, and afraid of where her doubts would take her, Joel adds a small joke in there. "Y'know those classes ain't free, kid. Go ahead"

"Okay" she gives up. "Just... tell me if anything happens, yes?"

"F'course. Trust me"

"I trust you"

He still remembers when Sarah's kindergarten teacher handed him that drawing: Joel was wearing a cape, and she said his little girl had told everyone in class his dad was a superhero because there was nothing he couldn't do. That same admiration and faith is there in her eyes, even as the small naive kid slips from his fingers and turns into the woman that stands before him. He's not the devil, but the worst father in the world, and that is pretty much the same to him.

When Sarah is out of your dorm, he's trapped inside the small room with your heavy crying on the other side of the door. He looks at the small place, thinking about all the times he's sneaked inside during the night, hiding like a criminal as you wait for him behind the door full of scrapped stickers, ready to capture his lips with an eagerness that gnaws his chest.

Now it's just him and your sobs, his terrified reflection displayed in the mirror in front of your bed, mockingly staring back.

What are you doing? it questions, and Joel, always ready to answer, has suddenly lost the ability to speak.

Forcing himself out of such a pitiful state, he approaches the door, knocking softly.

"Sarah" your hoarse voice speaks up, and just then, he realizes how much he loves hearing your voice, no matter how it sounds. "Don't you have classes to go to? Leave me, please. I promise I'm good, I-"

Joel hears your distress, so he interrupts what looks like the start of a nervous rambling wreck. Huh, doesn't he know you so well?

"Sarah's gone" a beat, "It's me, Joel"

As if you wouldn't recognize that deep voice even if you were deaf.

There's silence before the door flings open, surprising Joel, who takes a step back, barely noticeable to the rest, but obvious to you, who has spent hours admiring him and all his small movements, he who you could draw by memory and built in your head as real as he who was standing before you, his eyes circling with a whirlwind of emotions you can't quite place, yet make your heart race.

Joel takes in the sight of you, deciding it's unfair how good you look, despite your disheveled hair, run mascara and red-rimmed eyes: you are still the prettiest sight he's ever seen, and now he doesn't know what scares him the most.

"You're wearing my shirt" he says out loud his latest discovery. It's all he manages to say: not an are you okay? nor an what's wrong?

No, Joel just happens to be very stupid(ly in love).

"Sarah didn't see me" you hug the fabric that makes your frame look smaller, or maybe it's your tired composture that makes it seem that way, avoiding Joel from enjoying the way his shirt looks on you. "If that's what you wanted to know. Been inside there for hours, already was when she came by"

The fact that you rather explain and assure him of his supposed possible worries instead of sharing your own, makes his stomach tie on a knot. Were you too kind or perhaps selfless? Maybe just stupid(ly in love).

Joel grunts, and you're not sure if it's his way of dissmissing your comment (maybe he thinks you're lying), chastising you in a shallow manner or the fact that you're poorly trying to avoid the elephant in the room. Maybe he thinks you're still a foolish careless child who can't comprehend the weight of whatever it is you're doing by being with your bestfriend's dad behind everyone's back.

"Tell me" he gets closer to you, fingers on your cheeks, but they don't dig the skin, instead, his roughness hiding a surprising tenderness to them. "What happened, y/n?"

The rawness in his voice takes you by surprise. Joel Miller, who seemed a man impossible to waver, now stood before you, wrapped in a gloom that left you at loss for words, something akin to hope planting it's seed on your heart.

"Tell me" he demands, yet his pupils move as unsteady as your heart. There's no power for command in his voice, only what you could allude to helplessness.

Was it because you were putting up walls like he did?

Was it because the consequences of being with you are starting to dawn upon him?

Whatever it is, you don't like it.

"What's wrong?" he's pushing for an answer softly, such a contrasting image to that of him in bed. "Please, talk to me"

Please.

The words slip past his trembling lips, defenses crumbling.

Joel Miller hasn't pleaded since Sarah's mother packed her bags and walked out of their shared home. He promised himself he would never be vulnerable again, never at the feet of a loved one, beggin to be seen.

To be heard. To not be hurt. To be loved.

But here you were, red eyes blown wide at a confession spoken through other words.

Please.

Your chest feels heavy, breath constricted.

"Joel..." you utter his name like a prayer. As something to believe in; something to hold.

He rushes to your side, strong arms caging around you as your labored cries fill the tiny room.

"S'alright" he whispers against your ear, burying his face on your shaking shoulder. "M' right'ere, doll"

Your hold turns more desperate, practically clinging as if your life depended on it.

"Take your time, y/n" your name so soft, you feel like crying more. "I ain't goin' anywhere"

"Promise me" you whimper, holding tightly.

"I won't go" he assures. There it is, the same unwavering strength you know. It's for you, he thinks.

"Joel" you call out again, tone terrified. "I think I'm pregnant"

It takes him at least a minute to speak. Even to breathe.

"...What?"

He feels your erratic pulse against his chest.

"Joel. Look at me"

He doesn't feel your heartbeat anymore. Just then he realizes he's backed down, embrace letting go of yours. Joel takes in your eyes, shimmering with new tears and fears.

"Joel?"

"I'm here" his voice sounds like it belongs to someone else, and the reminder like it's for himself.

"I know" your small voice speaks up, "but, just- please, look at me"

Joel holds your gaze, and it's like your air supply as been cut.

We don't want this.

"Are you sure?" Joel asks cautiously, as if you were a small animal he's afraid to scare.

"No" you breath in. "I bought the test, but I couldn't take it... I was, for the very first time in my life, scared. But there's always a first, isn't it? That's when Sarah found me"

There's always a first. You weren't afraid when he pounced you next to his sleeping daughter, neither when you didn't stop coming and he let you in everytime, and absolutely not when he obscenely ate you out while Sarah was on the phone. No, you were brave―brave enough to stand defiant when his conflicting gaze pierced through you, daring you to be the first to leave this mess and forget about him. But you were brave because you stayed, despite it all.

That had to mean something, right?

"You said you wouldn't leave me" it comes out in a shaky breath; a threat. Your voice seethes with a quiet rage. "You promised, Joel"

Like the word promise was a dagger twisting on his insides, not a sacred oath.

So he forces himself to be that hero Sarah still thinks he is. After all, he promised her he's going to solve this, didn't he?

"I did" he runs a hand through his hair. "Got the test with you?" You slowly nod. "Take it, then. I'll wait here"

You don't move from your spot, chest still moving uneven under your labored breaths.

"When you come out, I'll promise I'll still be here"

He can't promise you more. The world? It's what you deserve but not what he can give; Joel can only give so much.

"Okay" your tone is clipped, and that's all you say before entering the bathroom and closing the door behind you.

The room feels smaller than it is, the small plastic stick feeling heavier in your fingers than it actually is. You hear the clock's tick, Joel's frantic pace and your own irrational beat. It feels like a bomb: ready to explode and destroy everything within it's range.

Time drags like a cigarette, walls closing over your shaking pale frame. Your phone has a timer going on, yet for some reason, it feels an end to your beginning. You hug your body, wishing it was Joel's arms doing so.

But you saw it: fear, hesitation. It was on his eyes, auburn cracking like wood under fire. He was weak, and so were you. All of this... it starts to loose it's meaning. What started as a summer fling now falls upon you like a second skin you can't quite wash off, and it's suffocating as much as the enclosed space where a stupid line could change the rest of your life forever.

Joel outside isn't doing much better. He's aware his walking probably set you on edge, so now he's sat at the small bed that dips under his weight. He takes one deep breath, two―then looses count.

How could he be so careless? For a brief moment, why did he let himself believe it could be?

For God's sake: you were his daughter's friend. He had seen you and Sarah play on his house, laughing on his porch, gossiping on her bedroom. Growing up.

He wanted you, a desire so consuming it sometimes kept him up at night, thoughts confusing with something else. Probably fear, probably acceptance.

Joel is aware you changed his life. You, with your wild spirit and obnoxious laugh. You whom he couldn't tear his gaze away when standing in the same room, a magnetic force making the world around you drawn to you and that dangerous allure you had that made it impossible to resist you. To forget you. To live without you.

He feels dirty. A monster. A wolf with an insatiable hunger, sinking his canine teeth on your soft flesh. He'd drink your blood, to always keep a part of you with him; to be one. Like a lamb sent to the slaughter: but you wanted it. You had placed your head inside his jaw; trusting. As if knowing he could devour you, yet he'd never hurt you. Daring, almost.

Show me you can love me. Take a bite. Take me as yours. Mark me. Ruin me for anyone else. My blood, it belongs to you. This isn't a sacrifice―this is love.

When you exit the bathroom, hand holding the pregnancy test, it's all clear to him.

For a moment even, Joel forgets there's a world outside and sees a small baby: they have your smile, your eyes―and nothing of him, because you're the sun of his moon, the light of his darkness, and that baby is a mirror of you and your beauty. You and your warmth, devoid of his cold and far from where his filth can taint it. They have to look like you, because you are the most beautiful person in the world, and suddenly, the idea one more of you is possible, makes it feel like just you isn't enough.

"It's negative"

For the second time in the day, Joel is rendered speechless. His gaze is trained on the floor, lost in thought. Besides his lack of an answer, whatever he's thinking makes you nervous.

"Joel, are you okay?" you call out.

He swallows the lump on his throat, pose awkward before he moves next to your bed.

"M' fine, baby. C'mere" he sits over it again, motioning with his hand the empty spot next to him. Joel's embrace is warm, like it shields you from the cold harsh truth.

"Are you upset?" you ask over the comfortable silence, the underlying tension stretching like a rubber band.

"No" his answer comes quick, "but I won't lie to ya', doll. Thought for a sec and ol' man like me could give a pretty girl like yourself a baby as beautiful as their mamma"

A treacherous pink dusts your cheeks. Had you lost all your common sense? Seconds ago, your life hung by a fragile thread, and now all your body can think is to go for the same risk again. Fuck it.

"Did you? I thought you were too busy freaking out"

Joel lets out a nervous laugh. "M' a busy man, doll. Learned how to do two things at once"

A fire settles in your stomach when his touch lingers over your soft flat belly, longing.

"Hmm, I see" your fingers move from his hold to his collarbone, as they play with the buttons he hasn't wore.

"Y/n" he warns. You stop for a moment, not because you're unsure, but because when you look up, his eyes don't shine with that glint of danger and hunger that gives you the thrills. Instead, they look at you with a fondness he doesn't seem to even realize―the one that gives you the hope of it all.

"I want this" you speak up, voice confident.

"I don't think that's a good idea, doll. What'ya need is-"

"You" your face gets close to his, cutting his words and breath. Joel's adam's apple bobs, your throbbing pussy going through a Pavlovian response, such action an indicator he's surrendered to you, mouth watering at just the thought. "You said you could do two things at the same time, right? The comfort me in the only way you know"

There's hesitation on his eyes, and while you think it's because he's still hung up on the idea this isn't what you need, Joel's mind is stuck in the fact you think he can only warm your bed but not your heart. It's stupid, indeed. It can't affect him that much. Ashamed, he cuts the space hanging between your lips and traps them in a heated kiss.

"Hmh, Joel" your voice barely audible as Joel's fingers grip on your hair, his sleazy tongue sliding it's way into your mouth until you can feel it in your teeth. "Please..."

He chuckles at your neediness. "Please, what?"

"Please" you whimper, feeling your back heat with droplets of sweat under Joel's shirt, the sticky feeling akin to that starting to pool in between your thighs. "Please, make me feel good"

Joel smiles adoringly, moving your body until your legs are up his shoulders. Sure, his knees covered by his dirty worn-out jeans are ruining your fresh laundry, and his joints may crack here and there, but you don't pay mind to this little things: all you care is how he's kissing your bare thighs, his salt and pepper stubble tickling skin that feels more sensitive than ever; burning almost.

"Gon' touch 'tis pretty pussy 'til you forget y'r name, doll" he breathes out. "Will ya' let me?"

You nod eagerly as he helps you get out of your panties, throwing them somewhere around the room. You smack his arm playfully at his rough manners, but then he's pressing his lips with wet ticklish kisses on your legs and laughter bubbles at the tingles it's causing.

"S-stop, Joel!" you beg, legs shaking. Your giggles are contagious, and soon the foreign feeling lifts the corners of his scowl into a smile, a concept becoming more familiar with time.

"I ain't stopping" his fingers then graze your clit, tauntingly. You whine, as Joel doesn't let up on your clit, his calloused digits coated in your arousal. "'Tis what you asked for, baby. So 'm gonna make you feel good. So good until you can't speak nothin' that ain't my name"

The threat feels like a delicious promise, so you tell him you'll behave.

"I wanna try somethin', doll. Wait" you whine at the loss of his fingers inside of you, and then he's moving your body until he's against the wall and you're on the border of the bed. With your eyes, you follow his line of view. "So needy, ain't ya'? Cockhungry slut. Jus' scared the shit out of me and now you want me inside?" he tsks. "Sick fella"

"Joel..." you breath out, desire pooling into your orbs.

"Wanna see you, doll" you see your reflection in the mirror as Joel lowers his head to whisper on your ear, eliciting goosebumps on your skin. "Want you to see yourself, too. How you'll be beggin' for me"

His middle and ring finger dip between your folds as he continues the minstrations, fingers pumping in and out as they graze your moist cunt. They start to go in circles, and even if it's not exactly next to your bed, you can see the mirror begin to fog, whines condensed in the heavy air.

His shirt clings uncomfortably to your body, but you don't care. In a way, he feels even closer to you, as if he was an extension of yourself.

Joel's body radiates heat on it's own, making the room's temperature skyrocket.

You lean your head back onto the mattress, moaning.

"Need ya' to use that pretty mouth of y'rs, doll. Say it" his fingers linger on the dip of your hips, waiting for an answer with a smirk and daring manner. "Say what ya' want; that's if you can"

It takes you a while to speak up, the slippery sound of Joel's coated fingers the only sound to be heard on your dorm.

"I... I need" you whine through labored pants, "I need you, Joel"

I need you, Joel. It's in the heat of the moment, really, yet on that very instant, he makes a silent vow that hangs unspoken in the air.

"Good girl" he bites your earlobe, making a chill run down your spine.

His fingers fuck into you just how you like it: swirling to explore your inner tight walls.

"Fuck. Love how your pussy takes me, doll. 'S mine, isn't it? Say it, say who this pussy belongs to. Who's the only man allowed to have it"

You close your eyes, but the answer comes clear. "You, Joel. Just you"

You whine, feeling him go harder in a new-found confidence. Your nails dig on his biceps, but he doesn't flich, still busy burying his fingers inside your clit as his mouth continues spilling filthy shit you barely can comprehend, mind starting to go numb.

Normally, Joel would make you cum on his fingers, always making sure to lick it after, claiming it was bad manners to leave to waste. But today, the clock ticking in your wall, he knows he must hurry.

"Eager, eh?" you taunt back, seeing how quickly he's pulling down his underwear, guiding the tip of his cock to your entrance.

Your dripping cunt welcomes his cock, tip teasing your entrance.

"Don't" he seethes.

"Don't?" you laugh. "Don't what, laugh?"

His fingers grab your jaw tightly, forcing you to look behind you.

"Don't stop lookin', doll"

Joel slips the tip of his cock into you, his hands grabbing your waist to steady you. He looks at you through the mirror, seeing your dazed eyes, waiting as you bite your lip.

"That's it, good girl" he praises, purring against your ear. You see his face go down and lick the side of your neck before sinking his teeth in it. "Gonna reward you for'at"

Your mouth falls agape when he fully pushes his cock inside of you, burying himself to the limit in the first thrust. You moan, stretch wet pussy trying to adjust to his girth. He groans, his hips moving back and forth with yours, to meet his thrusts.

"R-right there" you whimper, feeling eyes starting to water. It had been a long day, and with his cock buried deep inside you, you can't think of anything else: just him―like this, for the rest of your life; you don't need more. "Fuck, don't stop"

His thumb rubs across your cheekbone, capturing a tear that had slipped past your foggy mind in a brittle moment of vulnerability, brown eyes flickering with something else. It could be.

We could be.

"Fuck, you cryin' over this cock, doll? What'a fuckin' slut" he laughs incredulously, but there's a hidden fondness to it. "S' that how good 'm makin' you feel?"

You can only moan, his dick harder now, his infatuation with your fucked-out state evident in the way his movements become more hectic.

"Can't even speak? What'a dirty minx inside 'tis sexy little body"

"Mhm" you blabber, tears running hot down your cheeks, landing on the mattress in fat droplets, noticeable through the reflection even. Joel stares back at your puffy eyes, devotion pouring at your glossy gaze, coated in a faint red tint, more pronounced from your earlier cries. Fuck. Never did he think your lambent eyes and sniffle sounds could turn him on this much. Something about him being the cause of it has his head spinning.

"New rule" he growls, "you keep those pretty red eyes lookin' at me when you cum"

You whimper at his words, the powerful aura they carry pushing your orgasm closer to the edge. You feel your tight folds clenching around his cock, hands holding to his back while your nails dig in it. You feel yourself approaching your release, multiple tears escaping down your cheekbone. In an obscene gesture, it isn't his thumb but his tongue what removes the wet stream from your body, feeling the salty drops on his tastebuds.

You were already so worked up, it was a matter of seconds before you could cum at any moment. Your walls clench around his length, and before you can process, Joel pulls your body up, caging your tits until they're pressed against his soft chest. You face the white paint of your wall, and Joel can see your back in the mirror as he's still buried inside of you. You gasp at the change in position, all of the sudden, a painfull delicious sensation flooding your senses.

"You're gonna cum, aren't ya', doll?" Joel's asking, hot breath nestled in your neck.

"Hmh" you barely manage to blurt as he fucks into you harder, your arms clutching onto him. You were being so loud now that you were sure you'd get at least one noise complain, hoping it stays there; if they found out not only had you been fucking, but with a fourty year old man who happpened to be the father of your bestfriend, you'd probably get expelled. "So close..."

"You know?" he whispers, voice fragile over the sound of your pants and worked up breaths. "I was scared, ealier. M' sorry you had to see that" your body trembles, making you close your eyes. "But I need ya' to know, for'a moment, I did think about having a kid with you"

Your forehead drips with sweat, mixing with the sodium of your tears.

"Maybe in 'nother life, huh?"

Your heart feels like it's about to burst when he sloppily kisses you, as to prevent any words come out of your mouth―humilliating or full of regret, avoiding the heart ache of a rejection. Joel, for a moment, lets his heart wander off to territories he shouldn't, thinking of things he should leave to be. Joel digs his hole deeper, but he doesn't care: he just wants to be the best grave in your cementery.

"Maybe" you answer, but it sounds like a possibility, the promise of a foolish mind betraying the guarded hidden hope.

"Fuck, Joel" you bury your face against his soft pecs, your orgasm crashing over you. Your whine comes our rather loud, trying to drown the sound against his body. He doesn't stop holding you on his arms, firm; you'd probably fallen if he didn't.

"Wait for me, doll. 'M close"

"Please" you plead, kissing his jaw. "Need you. Want to feel you, Joel"

Not daddy, but his name. I want you. I need you. Want to feel you; for you to fill me. He groans, rhythm sloppy as he crashes his lips into yours. he should stop, especially after today's events, but God, his traitorous head is filled with images of you, belly round with his child, one carved to be the spitting image of you.

Do it.

You moan inside his mouth when you feel him finish inside of you, thick, your fingers running through his dark greying hair damp with sweat.

"M' right here" he says his words from earlier, and you feel yourself hugging him to keep his body next to yours even as he pulls out.

"I know" you hum, arms around his neck. "Thank you for coming"

"What of both?"

You let out a laugh.

"Jesus, Joel" but your tone is devoid of malice, adquiring that layer to it, just like his own. There's a shift in the air, and if you felt it before, now you know there's no point of return. "You sure are something else"

credits: divider @kodaswrld / gif @loregifs / dts: @ann-gell; ángel de mi corazón, tkm mucho, gracias por llegar a mi vida ִֶָ. ..𓂃 ࣪ ִֶָ🪽་༘࿐

#dilfistwrites #pedro pascal #pedro pascal x reader #pedro pascal x you #joel miller #joel miller tlou #joel miller x reader #joel miller x you #joel miller fanfiction #joel miller fic #joel miller smut #joel miller angst #bfd!joel miller #bfd!joel #tlou #tlou fanfiction #to the devil i know series

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ihearthayden · 2 months ago

Text

HOLO-HOOKUP

ANAKIN SKYWALKER

MDNI SMUT 18+

PAIRING: master!anakin x padawan!reader

WC: 2.9k

SUMMARY: you and anakin are in a secret relationship, since it’s against the jedi code. you couldn’t go on a mission today with your master and his team, because you got the fever. he decides to call you during a break, just for a quick check up—but the conversation will last longer than he expected.

CW: phone/hologram sex, masturbation [ f and m ], improper use of lightsaber/lightsaber play, degradation, dom!anakin, age gap, dirty talk, master kink, semi public, slight edging, name calling/pet names

A/N: hey guys! this is my first post/fic so i’m pretty nervous, but i hope you will like it. [ btw my inspo came from CW S7E2 ] my requests and dms are open so feel free to txt me, i’m in a need of hayden/sw enthusiast moots lol btw english is not my first language, so i’m really sorry if something is grammatically incorrect.

now enjoy the story! <3

The halls of the Jedi Temple were eerily silent as you rested in your quarters, the faint hum of Coruscant's bustling cityscape a comforting lullaby in the background—although it was muffled by the thick walls. From the bed, you could hear the distant whir of passing speeders, and their voices always made your mind wander into its blurry maze—to craft different imaginary scenarios. They fed your delusions with the false hope: maybe your master had finally arrived home from his mission. You were supposed to station on Anaxes with the rest of the team, but a morning fever confined you here, far from the frontlines, far from him.

The aftereffects of the illness weighed heavily on you, your body was sluggish and weak, yet it was your heart that ached the most. You couldn't stop thinking about Anakin's suffocating absence and how he should have been caressing your overheated frame instead of fighting on a different planet. You fantasized about him wiping away the beading sweat from your shivering, fragile body with his caring, large palms. You sighed, leaning back against the cool pillow. Every fiber of your being yearned to be by his side, battling droids and facing the galaxy's chaos together, but your condition had left you stranded here.

The hum of the holo-communication device broke the silence of your desperation. You froze stiff as a statue—just like the ones surrounding Naboo's lakeside, and your heart leaped into your throat. You rushed to the device, fingers trembling as you activated the connection. And there he was. The flickering light revealed his face; your heart ached at the sight of him. His face bore new scrapes and smudges of dirt, his hair tousled from the battlefield, but his eyes—those molten orbs of fire and tenderness—were fixed solely on you. You got goosebumps as a shiver went down your spine, but the medicine had already started to work, so the fever didn't cause it.

"Ani," You whispered—a breathless relief flooding through you at the mere sight of him. You hadn't even realized how badly you needed him until now.

"Chee-ska anota," he murmured, the Huttese term for "my dear love" falling from his lips like a prayer.

"I didn't expect to hear from you. I thought you'd be too busy saving the galaxy." You teased him softly, but deep down, you were glad you were on his mind as much as he was on yours. He chuckled—the tone low and warm—a balm to your frayed nerves.

"What's the point of saving it if you're not there to see it?"

But before he could continue his sentence, his words faltered for a second as his eyes traced over your face.

"You look—your face is still red, and your eyes..." He shook his head, his brow furrowing. "Your eyes are shining, but not in the way I want them to. You're still burning up, aren't you? Fuck." You noticed him curling his hands into a fist, his fingers dug into his palms. "I could already barely focus on this duty because of you, but this was the last straw. I'm going home."

Even though his concerns melted your heart, you didn't want to ruin their mission by making their strongest Jedi vanish or risk the option of the others discovering your little secret relationship.

"Honey, my fever is already gone. I just need to regain some strength." You were hoping this would change his drastic decision, but it only made him raise his voice at you firmly.

"It was already a huge mistake to leave you alone in such a helpless state. But I promise you, Chee-ska, I won't abandon you again. Ever." Worry pooled in his eyes, a silent storm brewing beneath his lashes.

God, he's always so stubborn.—you thought to yourself.

Your body craved every molecule of him to be close to you—but you knew you had to do something to calm him down and make him stay there with the troops. You brushed your curly locks away from your face and leaned forward on the bed so that your robe opened slightly in the front, revealing the lacy top of your satin nightgown, along with your rosy cleavage.

His features immediately loosened up, while a small sigh escaped his mouth—since he's aware that you never wear any lingerie under it.

"Don't try to manipulate me, Snips. I'm still your master, which makes me the one in charge. I make the rules." He tried to appear serious, but he couldn't mask the sound of longing that filled his voice.

You knew that he wouldn't be able to resist you—since he could never hold himself back. When you find a way to flick the switch in him, he sheds his cautious, caring personality and transforms into a predator. When he got aroused, he became a bloodthirsty beast—and you embodied the prey in his eyes. Just like a starving animal, ready to maul and devour any living creature in sight.

Since your goal was to push him over the edge, you bit the pink flesh of your pouty bottom lip and reached out to his other lightsaber—which was accidentally left lying on the nightstand next to your bed. It was the only thing that resembled his present, and as you slowly ran your fingers over its surface—you quickly figured out your plan.

"If you are the one making the rules, why don't you make them fun?" These words left your glossy lips as you drove the lightsaber up to the right corner of your mouth.

"Stop being a brat and fix your behavior. I command you as your superior, not your partner." His tone carried the weight of authority, a warning you might have believed—if not for his eyes, smoldering and unashamed as it lingered on your chest.

You loved to lure out his raw dominance with your attitude so he would use you to fulfill his sickest, secret, intimate desires. His mechanical arm and the force combined allowed him to take advantage of you and have more control over you than anyone else could ever do—and you enjoyed it more than anything.

"Are you sure that is what you want? Because if you change your mind and stay, you could see me doing this." You kneeled and grabbed the lightsaber with both of your hands so that you could lick it all the way from the bottom to the very top of it. You started swirling your tongue around the tip of it and throated every inch of it without any warning. It wasn't a challenge to take it—your esophagus had adjusted from everyday use to Anakin's significantly bigger size—but it still drew a quiet gag out of you. Your teary eyes never left his surprised gaze, which hunger quickly overtook.

You saw him reach out one of his hands towards your hologram—to pretend to grab your hair—and started bobbing it in the same rhythm as you did with your head. You noticed his growing bulge through the thin fabric of his Jedi uniform—and you couldn't help but sit back on your heels and start rocking your hips a little for some stimulation. This lustful view strikes a tingling sensation in your abdomen. Your brain flooded with the picture of his trembling, overstimulated tip—as it stained his pants with his sweet, milky, smeared precum—waiting for you to clean it up with your tongue.

You snapped back to reality, and a streak of saliva remained attached to the object as you released it from the hot cave of your mouth—while trying to catch your breath.

"I wish that it would have been you. Even though it's your lightsaber, unfortunately, it still can't cum down my throat like you." You said with sad puppy-dog eyes while trying to stop panting, but an unexpected statement struck your ear.

"Ride it."

A naughty grin appeared on your face as you tried to tease your boyfriend for a tiny bit longer.

"I thought you were worried about your sick little girl, but now you want to use her?" You said with a mocking tone, but he immediately growled at you.

"I said ride it." The harsh order made you stare at him momentarily, but he instantly broke the silence.

"Don't play stupid now. Just obey." He aggressively unbuckled his belt with one hand and rolled up his sleeves while he continued his monologue.

"I lied to the team that I came to this empty warehouse to strategize, so be a good slut for me and don't waste our precious time." He gently ran his fingers over the prominent outline of his size, which made his voice tremble with desire.

"I saw my needy baby grinding while putting on her little show, so don't you dare to deny how fucking wet you are for me." You squeezed your thighs together, and they remained stuck from how sticky he made you. "You knew exactly what you were doing, so now it's your job to finish what you started, sweet little thing."

You realized how Obi-wan or even the enemy could catch him at any millisecond, so you quickly tossed the lightsaber on the bed, placed your hands in front of yourself and positioned your tiny body above it.

"Yes s-sir!" You stuttered, but before you could start masturbating, you heard him say—

"Stop. Did you just go dumb on me already? You forgot something. Words, sweetheart, words. What do good girls say?" His serious side always made your core drool. You remembered the missing essential and said it without hesitation.

"Thank you, master!" His mean face finally released a small smile.

"Now you can continue."

You shifted until your painfully throbbing slit hovered directly over the part that was covered in ridges. As you slowly sank into it, the cold touch of the remaining saliva sent a jolt through your body. You started humping on your little "toy "back and forth, dragging your clit across the whole length of it. The friction made your breath come up in ragged gasps. You tried to glare into his lustful iris but couldn't make contact with his gaze—Anakin had already rolled his eyes back. A heavy moan escaped from your plump lips as he revealed his fully erect member, slamming it against his muscular abs. A puddle of precum pooled around the base of his dick, and some of it already ran down to his thighs. The liquid glistened as the light reflected off it, but he spat in his palm to lubricate it even more. He started gliding his hand on his most sensitive area while watching you chase your high. The holopad was set up to make it look like he was towering over you, ready to finish on your face.

"You are the filthiest whore in the whole galaxy. I mean, look at you, tiny Padawan of mine…skipping your stationing duties to pleasure yourself at home." He kisses his teeth, making a quiet 'tsk' sound." You're fucking pathetic." He threw his head back as he degraded you. You tried to fasten your pace, but your legs started to shake unintentionally to let you know you wouldn't last long. A knot began to form in your stomach, but Anakin shouted at you.

"Oh no, don't even think about it. Don't you dare to cum yet. I didn't give you permission. Don't be greedy."

You whined, your fingers curling desperately into the sheets, the fabric twisting between your trembling hands as you fought against the inevitable. Every muscle in your body was drawn tight, quivering under the weight of restraint, but it was futile—you were at Anakin's mercy. The heat between your legs was unbearable, pulsing, demanding release, but you knew better than to give in without permission. Your breath hitched, a pathetic whimper slipping past your lips. You felt helpless, wholly unraveled under his control, but deep down, you knew his cruelty had a purpose. He wasn't denying you out of malice—he was building you up, drawing out your pleasure until it consumed you until you shattered so thoroughly you wouldn't recover for days. The way he edged you was deliberate, precise, and designed to wreck you in the best way possible. Every second he made you wait, every teasing word, every denied climax—it all led to something greater. He wanted you mindless by the time he allowed you to break. He wanted to pull every last drop of pleasure from you until you were gasping his name like a prayer. And when that moment finally came, when he finally let you fall, it wouldn't just be pleasure—it would be devastation.

"Wow, such a good girl for me, you held it back. Now, my princess get rewarded for finally being obedient." He looked up at your face, then down to his old weapon in your hands, and his lips curved into a smirk.

"Slide it in your pretty pussy. Ride my lightsaber as if it was my cock." Anakin's penis was aching, his whole body was shaking while he jerked off.

"Spread your legs wider, angel, will you? I want to see what's mine. Your warm cunt belongs to me." After his request, your hole pulsed as if it had its own heartbeat. You aligned the "dildo" to your entrance, and with one sharp movement, you rammed it into your opening. You reached up to your chest to cup both of your breasts in your hands and gave them a rough squeeze before you pinched your nipples as Anakin's replacement kissed your cervix. You saw that he trusted into his palm faster than before and became much more vocal.

"That's it, that's my girl. You are taking it sooo good." His praises helped your orgasm to build up even more.

"A-ani mhh I'm close, I c-can't take it anymore! " He heard your scream so he looked up from under his eyebrows. You could see that pearly sweat streaks started to run down from his forehead, and their route followed the scar mark on his eye.

"Do you think you deserve it? Beg for it. Can you do that, little one?" He questioned. "How much do you want it, hm? Show me. Make me proud."

His hips hadn't stopped since the call started; he fucked his palm restlessly, so you knew that you had to trigger his weakest spot to get the job done.

"I promise I'll be your slave, your fucktoy when you come home! I'll let you use me as a cumdumpster anytime, just please let me finish already. Anakin, it hurts! " You whimpered while tears ran down from your cheeks to your chin. You started rapidly circling on your swollen clit and pumping into your soaked folds, sliding in and out his "stunt double" that rubbed against your G-spot repeatedly. This was all he needed to hear and see.

"K-kay, let it happen baby, cum for me. Cmon, give it to me. Give me what's mine." He commanded, his words are law.

Your back arched with grace as you went crashing over the edge. You collapsed on your bed into a puddle that your squirt made, mind blank as waves of pleasure rolled through you. The world around you blurred into nothingness, consciousness suspended in the aftershocks of ecstasy. This meant the main attraction to Anakin, the sight of you undone, the way your body trembled and spasmed. His breath hitched, muscles tensing as climax washed over him. His cock throbbed violently in his grasp, spilling thick ribbons of his release over his fingers as he choked out your name. Ropes of his load painted his v-line, dripping down toned his stomach and pooling in his lap.

"Fuck, you are something else. Good job, kid." He panted as he dragged his pants back on.

"See, I told you you don't need to leave work for me." You stuck out your tongue while giggling and kicking your feet.

"You are not sick anymore, that's for sure. The only sick thing is what you promised me in return for your orgasm." He winked at you with his ocean-blue eyes. "Good thing that Rex's helmet recorded everything, so I will have proof."

Your eyes widened, and you couldn't believe what you heard.

"OH MY GOD—ANAKIN SKYWALKER, YOU FUCKING FREAK! Why didn't you tell me you made the call from his helmet?" You screamed in anger, but your boyfriend just laughed in your face.

"More risk, more fun, doll."

Before you could respond to his answer, a sharp knock echoed from his end of the connection. You could see the sudden shift in his expression, the way his shoulders stiffened. From offscreen, you heard Rex's voice, low but clear—

"General Skywalker, you've got company."

Anakin cursed softly, his free hand running through his already messy hair. He turned back to the holo-projector, his face conflicted.

"The team found me, I have to go. I'll be home soon, so don't forget our deal. Ni chuba du," he said, his voice barely above a whisper, the words in Huttese heavy with meaning. "I love you."

Before you could respond, the connection flickered out, the blue light vanishing, and you were left staring at the empty space where he had been.

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