#AND DOES TAKASUGI MEAN NOTHING TO YOU?!!?

[palms-upturned]

[image description: first image is of a tiny Gojo and Geto in the background of a Jujutsu Kaisen manga panel, second is of Sakata Gintoki waving and grinning at the camera. End description]

Round 2, Bracket 7

[sankatsuka]

Shinsuke Takasugi Character Discussion PART 1 - Putting a Name to the Irrationality, that is Love

I recently finished watching Gintama and I really, really needed to talk about my current opinions on Takasugi's character. I'm absolutely blown away by the writing that I really, really need to put into words my emotions about it.

Warnings:

I think there are many ways to interpret Takasugi's dialogue given how ambiguous his choice of words tend to be. This is just my own personal interpretation that hits me best.

THIS INTERPRETATION HEAVILY IMPLIES TAKAGIN. Gintoki has always obviously been the most strongly connected to Takasugi's character. Platonic or romantic, I don't think there will be someone they can come to love more than each other. I know, implying a romance in a Shounen Jump series that's normally queerphobic? But it just makes sense to me (//shot).

Takasugi's attachment is pretty much obvious and evident from the very start, with how deranged he had become from the tragedy of the war and was acting out so as to not let go of Shoyo to live an ordinary life. It's interesting to note how Katsura was swayed by Gintoki to change his ways, but Takasugi wasn't. His childhood does somewhat explain why: until he met Shoyo, he seemingly had not a single thing to live for. As compared to Katsura who was loved by his grandmother, Takasugi was born with nothing - his parents were abusive and willing to kick him out at such a young age. It's no surprise he became unapologetically rebellious, while Katsura found his way as the Runaway Kotaro thanks to his grandmother. But because the meaning of life was so intertwined with bushido, that his parents would have loved him if he was a Samurai, a path was something Takasugi couldn't live without.

So meeting Shoyo, who saw him as a Samurai for the lost punk he was, was like being told there already is meaning - a bushido - in his present impulses. Their repeated encounters and exchanges cemented Takasugi's place at Shoka Sonjuku, and it makes sense for Takasugi to become attached to Shoyo who gave him that home. But as we hear more and more from Takasugi's perspective and his realizations with Kiheitai, it made me feel there was a distinction between his feelings for Shoyo and Gintoki - it wasn't Shoyo he was obsessed with, it was Gintoki. Gintoki represents the vague path he found as a Samurai.

And Shouyou's values simply allowed for that half-hearted, meaningless path.

When you're in the deepest depths of despair, as shown in many instances in Gintama, the love that pushes you forward is from the people who want the best for you. In Katsura's first taste of despair from losing his family, it was his grandmother's love for him that kept him going despite being ostracized for his status. But there was no one like that in Takasugi's life for him to keep going, which is why Katsura's criticism on how Takasugi was 'ungrateful for his chance at a good education' stands out. Takasugi only knew how to use his body to fight and gain power - likely from his hostile, unforgiving home environment where one would have to dissociate to cope - that it was the only thing he took seriously in life. But there was no name for that obsession. And for that Takasugi who couldn't think about anything else other than becoming powerful, Gintoki was the first and only one to respond to that violent spirit.

As much as any other child, Takasugi wanted to be loved, but because he grew up in a hostile environment, he knew nothing about expressing emotions normally. And so that desire translated into physically acting out as reason would only further harm you in a toxic environment. In Takasugi's depths of despair where the only thing he knew was to grow stronger and stronger, Gintoki was there, refusing to lose to him, even telling him to come back after his first victory when all other kids just ridiculed him. For the first time, Takasugi wasn't alone. And this stays true even in the present: Gintoki knows he has to stay strong for Takasugi to keep taking his anger on until he stops.

Naturally, when you find someone important to you, you want to be closer to them emotionally, you want to mean something to them. But the problem is that Takasugi's only way of expressing emotions is through violence, and Gintoki is probably the least open person when it comes to his own emotions. Because of this, although their scores were already matching up, Takasugi still felt as if he was chasing after him. So, more than anyone, Takasugi cared about the one thing Gintoki clearly held close to his heart: Shoyo. This is evident in how even on the brink of death, Takasugi made it a point to make Gintoki to promise to save Shoyo no matter what, even if it meant running over his corpse.

And when Takasugi takes out his anguish on Gintoki over Gintoki's 'choice' to pick Takasugi over Shoyo despite everything, not a single word is mentioned about Shoyo's emotions - all of his venting is just questioning why over and over again, focusing more on how the choice didn't make any sense.

The answer should have always been clear, that it was because Shoyo wanted to protect his disciples and Gintoki simply upheld this. Even Oboro tells it straight to their faces that their teacher granted them their lives. Katsura never seemed to ever question Gintoki's choice himself probably because it was too obvious. But Takasugi couldn't see it for some reason, and it bothers him so much from just not understanding why. This further goes to show how important understanding every fibre of Gintoki's being is to Takasugi.

And Gintoki is more aware than Takasugi of the very reason why Takasugi can't see it - because, in Gintoki's shoes, Takasugi would have done the same, but is unable to discern the reason why he would do such an irrational thing (hint: because he doesn't understand love, duh). This means a lack of self-discipline that doesn't follow Shoka Sonjuku's teachings and he is apparently no longer living by Shoyo's values. It's always been important for Takasugi to be a Samurai in some right. So as punishment for abandoning Shoka Sonjuku's teachings, he would have to kill the very person his body wanted to protect more than his teacher who was the rational choice. And Gintoki knows, because it's probably easy to tell when someone is obsessed with you.

Even in the very first episode Takasugi appears in the entire anime, his criticism of Gintoki's 'carefree' lifestyle reflects the lack of self-discipline he believes he has too. If he chose to kill Shoyo, he wouldn't have anything honourable to fight for anymore, and it would leave an even more bitter taste to live a carefree life on top of all the corpses he piled up after he abandoned their original goal of saving Shoyo. Takasugi hates that his choice would mean trampling over the dead bodies of his comrades. And seeing Gintoki live a peaceful life despite that 'selfishness' further fuels Takasugi's bloodlust to motivate his own self-punishment, despite also wanting him alive.

These beliefs Takasugi projected onto Gintoki actually come to fruition when Bansai is killed. Now that Takasugi is no longer blinded by his self-hatred, he can clearly see the corpses of the comrades who believed in him that he's been stepping on to get this far on his half-heartedness. Takasugi is the type who strongly wants what he wants (Gintoki, translated in wanting to win against him), but is also an emotional person who strongly cares about people - so walking down his selfish path is difficult with no scapegoat (Shoyo) to justify the horrible consequences to other people or another emotion to blind him from realizing it (self-hatred). As Bansai says, Takasugi is a weak man who anguishes about the corpses that pile up underneath him. Of course it haunted him thinking his body would selfishly save Gintoki instead of Shoyo in that moment and abandon the wishes of all the corpses of his comrades (supporting Takasugi to save Shoyo). Not only was he dishonouring Shoyo's values, he was also abandoning the people who believed in him.

This explains why Takasugi couldn't move on from the past like Gintoki and Katsura did. Katsura can be swayed by Gintoki because he knows nothing will bring back the dead and the best thing to do is to move on for their sake. Takasugi can't be swayed even knowing this, because of the self-hatred that whispers in his ears that he would never be doing enough to honour the souls of his fallen comrades and Shoyo. And it is a self-hatred born from witnessing Gintoki's 'choice', a constant reminder that he would choose Gintoki's life over Shoyo. When that wasn't what his fallen comrades or maybe even Shoyo (because they've come all this way for his life) would have wanted.

And in their next encounter on Rakuyo, Gintoki seems to even straight up joke about Takasugi's obsession with him. Cryptically, of course:

Gintoki did nothing to save Takasugi's life in Rakuyo, it was all Kiheitai. So in other words, it may not even be about their current situation, Gintoki is insulting Takasugi as a whole - Takasugi needs to rely on Gintoki's existence to have a reason to live, as Kiheitai sees him. This is because Gintoki was the light in his despair, like he was to Kiheitai (Spoiler: Kiheitai helps him see himself of course). And that is what torments him as he has to come to gripes with the lives he's willing to put aside for Gintoki.

Continued in Part 2 because Tumblr has an image limit. 😭

[sakukaguxxi]

Yakult and Tobacco | Gintama

Word count: 3.4k

C/W’s: none really except for a tiny bit of blood

Summary: a story about what happens to Takasugi and the Kiheitai after ch. 704

a/n: This is my first time writing for Gintama, and I wanted to do something like this for a while but didn’t think I was a good enough story writer. But I really felt passionate about this topic and tried my best. I was inspired by various ideas from fandom and combined with my own random ideas. I hope this isn’t too bad. Likes and reblogs are appreciated!

______

The long search hadn’t been for nothing. It wasn’t a pipe dream, it wasn't a dead end. This couldn’t be a coincidence. After investigating the dragon holes for several months, Matako finally found him. 

She was overcome with tears of joy and relief as she held the reborn Takasugi in her arms. The local villagers who had gathered around upon getting word of a mysterious baby appearing in the dragon hole looked on in mild confusion. What does this baby mean to this woman? they must have thought. Was it really born from the dragon hole or just abandoned? Is it the divine wrath of Ryujin-sama?

Matako didn’t really care how this scene looked to anyone else at that moment. It was just so personal. Feeling like a big weight had been lifted off her shoulders finally, she decided she was ready to leave after she finished crying and wiped away her tears. Wherever home was, they could now return.

Matako turned to the crowd. “I will take this child,” she announced.

Nobody else was racing to volunteer, but there were a few murmurs among the crowd. Then one man pointed at the infant, shouting, “This could be an attack by the Dragon Vein God! You shouldn’t keep it!”

“I can handle this,” she responded firmly. “You don’t know the whole story, because this is actually my friend who I’ve been looking for, and now he’s been revived. It probably sounds crazy, but even if you don’t believe me, I have to do this.”

Now that she found Shinsuke, it was time to embark on the journey to regroup with Takechi. Some villagers were actually kind enough to help her by lending her some baby supplies and giving her directions, even if they didn’t fully understand the background. 

……

Matako met Takechi at a small house on the outskirts of Edo that the Kiheitai had used as a hideout. It would make a decent place for someone who wanted some privacy away from the city. There was a dirt path leading to it with a hedge running along one side.

When Matako arrived at the house, Takasugi still looked like a baby. She and Takechi decided they would take care of him together. The two Kiheitai members smiled down at the infant. Takechi, normally less sentimental, was still happy Takasugi had been found. He was also proud that after being told there wasn’t the slightest chance of Takasugi being resurrected like Utsuro, their intuition had actually worked out in their favor.

“The dark purple hair is definitely the same,” Henpeita observed. 

“And now he has two functioning eyes again,” Matako added. She gazed at the baby, whose eyes were open and was looking up at the two of them. “I wonder if he recognizes us yet even in this state…”

Henpeita put a hand on her shoulder. “We can’t know yet, so you shouldn’t worry right now.”

……

Takasugi had reached a new stage of growth within a couple days of arriving at the hideout, looking around preschool age now. Despite hearing what happened to the reborn Utsuro from Gintoki and knowing what altana was capable of, Matako and Henpeita were still amazed to witness Takasugi’s growth first-hand. It reminded them of Princess Kaguya. Altana truly was a powerful energy.

Henpeita went and bought more clothing for Takasugi in a couple different sizes since they didn’t know when his next growth spurt would be. As the strategist of the Kiheitai, he was trying to think ahead. He also bought Yakult, which Takasugi had gone absolutely nuts for in the past. He thought it might even help spur on his memories.

There weren’t many other people in the close-by area to worry about, but Matako felt a sense of protectiveness towards Takasugi during this sensitive time. She didn’t want people to think he was a monster if they noticed his fast growth. She was glad she’d found him when she did instead of him falling into the wrong hands. For the time being, he had to stay near the house at least.

The interesting thing about Shinsuke growing up at an accelerated rate was that he still couldn’t speak, but seemed to understand basic communication in a way. He also easily regained his ability to do certain things such as walking and using chopsticks with only a little instruction if any. He mostly followed the other two around quietly like a puppy and went with the flow of whatever they were doing. Being like a little kid, he could still get into mischief. Gintoki had mentioned that the reborn Shouyou started speaking fully when his memories were unlocked. However, Matako didn’t know if or when Takasugi would regain his memories and return to his old self. 

……

On the second night since Takasugi’s new growth, Matako rolled to her side and smiled softly at him as they were about to go to sleep. They slept in the same room on their own futons since he had his first growth spurt out of babyhood. But Shinsuke was given the one regular-sized blanket in the house. Takechi hadn’t gotten around to shopping for more of those yet. 

For the first time since being reborn, Shinsuke had a dream of various people crying or looking like they’re about to cry. There was the blonde-haired woman called Matako, a man with curly silvery-blue hair, and another man with long light brown hair. In the dream, Shinsuke thought, No… please don’t cry, everyone… 

Shinsuke woke up again early in the morning and turned toward Matako out of curiosity and instinct. She was still asleep but looked cold and exposed from not having a decent blanket. Despite still being tired, he felt an urge to help her, so he dragged his blanket across the room and covered her. Then he laid down next to her on top of the blanket and pulled one edge over himself.

Like a lot of dreams, most of the contents of Shinsuke’s had faded from his mind within a few minutes of being awake, leaving only vague bits and pieces. The details of most of the people had become blurrier, and he wasn’t aware yet that it was based on real experience anyway. 

A few hours later, Takechi stepped in the doorway to the others’ bedroom, asking, “Matako, are you awake yet?”. He had returned from a short visit to the city and was surprised to see the little Takasugi sleeping next to her on top of the blanket. 

Memories of the first time Takechi officially met Matako flashed in his mind: despite the Bakufu confiscating her gun, she did whatever she could to try to save the imprisoned Jouishishi, such as threatening Takechi with a dagger to the back. More important to her than Takasugi acknowledging her or letting her join him was preventing his death, because she believed the country needed him. No doubt, being saved by him personally had also cemented her loyalty and belief that he had a good heart. Takechi had handed back her gun and told her she would do well to take revenge herself. He recalled her surprised face at the end of the battle when Shinsuke simply said, “Let’s go,” letting her know she was included.

I never thought I’d see them as roommates, Henpeita thought.

……

Later the same day, Gintoki was walking towards the Kiheitai hideout when he came upon a little boy standing on the path. Despite looking young, Gintoki could recognize that face anywhere, having grown up with him. Shinsuke stared up at him like a deer caught in headlights.

“So we meet again, huh?” Gintoki stated calmly, his eyes at half-mast.

Meanwhile, Matako was in the house, expecting Gintoki any minute. The Kiheitai had contacted all of Shinsuke’s old friends, and Gintoki was the first who was able to visit. She was suddenly alerted to a child whining, “Let me go! Put me down!” followed by a familiar male voice saying, “Excuse me.” She went into the genkan to see Gintoki holding Shinsuke under his arm

“Let me go!” Shinsuke repeated, trying to wriggle free.

“Is this your kid?” Gintoki asked sarcastically. “He made an impudent face, and I knew right away.” He finally released the boy from his hold.

As Shinsuke went forward to climb over the porch step, kicking his sandals off behind him, Matako grumbled, “...It’s obvious.” Shinsuke dashed past her into the house. “Come in,” she offered to Gintoki.

……

After setting Shinsuke up with a game on the other side of the room, Matako and Gintoki sat across from each other with their own cup of tea. Gintoki eyed him for a bit before focusing on Matako. “How has taking care of him been so far?” he asked.

“It’s been relatively good. It’s not like I have much experience taking care of babies or little kids, but this isn’t a regular situation. Takechi-senpai has also been a big help, I hate to admit…”

“When did he start talking, anyway? He still seems pretty quiet otherwise…”

Matako frowned slightly. “Just today when you showed up carrying him… He never said anything before, so I guess this is progress. I thought you meeting him could change things…”

“Well, yes, I am very influential,” Gintoki joked. “I’m not the main character of my own series for nothing.”

Matako looked downcast, so Gintoki snapped back into seriousness, waiting for her to continue. “I can’t help but compare your situation with Shouyou to ours,” she explained. “I want Shinsuke-sama to be happy no matter what happens, but deep down my hope is he’ll regain his memories and return to being the person we know and love. Am I selfish for this? Would he be better off starting a different life and forgetting Shouka Sonjuku, the Joui War, the Kiheitai, everything?” Her eyes stung with tears. “I won’t abandon him, but I can’t deny there’s still a void from losing a loved one. Not only could we not prevent it, we weren’t there for him during that time. We had no idea he was dying. I thought we were doing the right thing by giving him some space, but it didn't work out for us in the end. We shouldn’t have left him alone…”

Suddenly, Takasugi scurried up next to Matako to hold her hand. He noticed her looking and sounding like she might cry and wanted to comfort her somehow. Matako was surprised by his action, but it made her smile. “Don’t worry, I’m alright,” she reassured him, giving him a one-armed hug. He stood back for a few seconds like he wasn’t sure, then returned to his area.

Gintoki drank more tea with a pensive expression. “You don’t know this, but I actually had amnesia once from a car accident and lost my identity,” he shared. “Yeah, I became a productive member of society and didn’t remember bad memories from my past, but it wasn’t me. My friends struggled to get me back, and while it didn’t happen right away and I left them to start a new life, they still came to get me eventually. So the way you feel is natural, Matako-san. And although I can’t make any guarantees and can only go by my one experience, I’d say you shouldn’t give up… Just be honest with him.”

……

Matako saw Gintoki off at the entrance when it was time to go. “Thank you again for coming, Shiroyasha,” she said. 

“No problem,” Gintoki replied. “And like I said, I’ll also see what else I can do. I’ll talk to Zura and Tatsuma about it too. So, see you guys later.”

“See ya.” That came from Shinsuke, who had come out to the front. Matako and Gintoki were still a little stunned to hear him speak again at all, but Matako did a double take because his yukata was now up to his knees. He definitely looked taller than he was even less than twenty minutes ago! Now he had an elementary school-age appearance. 

Gintoki also noticed and smirked. “Take care now,” he said.

On his way down the path, Gintoki encountered Takechi coming from the opposite direction with a bag in hand. 

“Were you in a hurry?” Takechi asked, stopping.

“I had some barley tea and we talked for a bit,” Gintoki replied. As he walked past Takechi, he continued, “I don’t know what’ll end up happening, but… he definitely doesn’t need diapers anymore,” and waved back.

……

Gintoki, Katsura, and Sakamoto met at a local restaurant and sat at a booth together, with Gintoki on one side and the other two across. He was catching them up on his visit to the Kiheitai from the day before.

“I admit that I was initially skeptical and didn’t think it was possible for him to be resurrected,” Katsura said. “I admit it, I was wrong.”

“Aren’t you glad things are starting to work out, though?” Sakamoto said. 

“Yeah, but there’s still the issue of him getting his memories back, which the Kiheitai care a lot about,” Gintoki pointed out. “Matako-san seemed upset when I talked to her. I think we should all do our best to help in some way. Takasugi was our friend too, so we want him to get his memories back, right?”

Sakamoto turned to Katsura with a smile and said, “Well, since it’s our turn to visit now, let’s go together. We should do it soon this week.”

“Let’s bring presents,” Katsura suggested excitedly. 

……

After Gintoki left the Kiheitai hideout, Takasugi didn’t try to speak the rest of that day or into the next. Matako and Takechi weren’t sure why, but hypothesized maybe his mind was still settling in and it was part of his development. They asked him at one point if he could remember his past, but he shook his head in confusion. So they tried to tell him some more about his background, and he seemed to be listening, but his reaction was calm, almost unreadable.

It wasn’t until after going to bed that more peculiar things happened once again. Takasugi had another dream where he was standing by a river at night with fireworks going off. It was a beautiful sight, and he watched in awe as different colors and even shapes soared across the sky. There were other people around him watching, including three people right in front of him. Then those three people turned around and smiled at him. There was Matako, Takechi, and a green-haired man wearing sunglasses… Bansai. By the way they were looking at him, it seemed like they were happy he was having a good time and enjoyed being with him. 

The scenery changed somehow seamlessly to a man standing in front of a nondescript background. He had long, light brown hair and wore gray and beige clothing, with his arms crossed and tucked into the opposite sleeves of his haori. He was smiling and had a strong aura like a wise and kind person. He said, I’m proud of you, Shinsuke, so don’t give up. 

Shouyou-sensei? Shinsuke thought as the recognition completely dawned on him.

Takasugi didn’t get to hear a response as he woke up soon after that in the morning. Not only had he grown to adult size overnight, he now finally had a realization about himself. That dream had made everything clear. 

He sat up cross-legged, the blanket falling over his lap. Since he grew a lot over night, his yukata had opened up and became more like a shirt, revealing his bare torso and obviously not long enough anymore to cover his bottom half if not for the blanket. 

Matako groaned slightly as she also started to wake up. She tilted her head to look at Takasugi and was met with the grown version of him staring back at her with his mouth slightly agape.

“Wha- Huh?!” Matako gasped, sitting up and pulling her blanket further over her chest out of reflex. She honestly hadn’t expected to wake up that morning and suddenly see Takasugi look basically like the person she’d known for 12 years. Out of awkwardness, she shifted her position to slightly face away from him while her eyes were still pointed his way. She trembled a little as she reached to push some hair out of her face. 

Takasugi put his hand over his left eye. “Hey… It’s me,” he finally said.

In a flash, Matako went forward to kneel in front of him as he lowered his hand. She looked up right into his eyes. “You can see, can’t you?” she asked with concern. 

Takasugi looked down and took in her expression fully, which conveyed intense emotion. “...Yes, I can see …” he answered. “It’s just that I only noticed now that I got it back…”

“How do you feel now?” 

“I’m still trying to process everything and let the fact that this is real settle in… But I know how and why I came back and accept it. On that day, Shouyou-sensei actually told me his plan to sacrifice himself by using up all the altana in his body to cancel out the terminal’s altana. And he was distraught at the time because he didn’t think he could save me as well…” He raised one side of his mouth in a half smile. “I feel like Sensei was by my side until you came to pick me up again. And he still is here in a way…” 

Takasugi took a scan around the room, then continued, “And even before I got my memories back, I’ve seen over the past couple weeks how you and Takechi have taken care of and protected me, so I’m also grateful to you. Also importantly, I’ve wanted to say I’m sorry for leaving the Kiheitai behind without a word and any hurt caused by my absence. I couldn’t tell you what was going on and I didn’t know how much longer I’d have to live or if I’d see you again at all. But thank you for not giving up on me.”

Matako felt her heart swell and couldn’t help herself, leaning forward to give him a big hug. He was momentarily stunned but formed a small smile and reciprocated. “It really was no problem,” Matako said. “You know the Kiheitai will be there for you. And we may not have had the chance to meet your master, but we can’t thank him enough for making this possible...”

……

Once Shinsuke was fully dressed and had gotten his bearings, he said to Takechi when they were outside walking, “Could you hand me your sword? There’s something I want to see…”

Takechi unsheathed his sword and handed it over without a word, his eyes fixed on Shinsuke’s face the whole time.

Shinsuke raised his left hand and carefully pricked the pad of the middle finger. There were some tiny beads of blood, but nothing else happened. After sucking the blood off his finger, he resumed, “I actually don’t think I had to do that to know I’m still mortal, but I just felt like making a point for myself.” He gave Takechi back his sword.

As Takechi put it away, he responded in an amused tone, “I figured that’s why you wanted it.”

Shinsuke chuckled. “I wanna get a new sword sometime soon, though. It doesn’t feel right not having something at my waist. And I might need it anyway if the Kiheitai has plans.”

……

Later that day, Katsura and Sakamoto came over. “Sorry it’s been a while since I last wrote,” Katsura told Matako as they stood at the genkan with him in front of Sakamoto. He held up a paper bag. “This is a gift for you, Matako-san. It’s one of those new-fangled robot vacuums.”

“Oh, wow,” Matako remarked.

Katsura stepped a little closer to her like he was giving her some topic secret advice, but said in a louder voice with his finger pointed up, “For the little one’s sake, we need to make sure we take care of dust in even the nooks and crannies…”

“It’s really nice, but why are you so loud right now? And anyway, Shinsuke-sama is already…”

“Oi,” came a baritone voice from inside, which got Sakamoto and Katsura to crane their necks around Matako. She led them forward so they could see in the doorway.

Takasugi was sitting on the floor holding a kiseru. “You guys are as loud as ever,” he said with a grin.

______

a/n: Thanks for reading! Please like and reblog!

[lilac-5ky]

Spending Valentine's Day with kid!Takasugi (x kid!Fem!Reader)

A/N: I lowkey wrote this last minute thing because I had to contribute :p At first, I wanted to write Valentines Day headcanons for him, but then I thought I'd write a cute lil story about cute lil child Shinsuke and his cute lil crush. Might do a follow up post on actual V-Day headcanons today or tomorrow, my brain is toasted and I haven't even properly proofread this. Apologies for inconsistencies!

Plot: Shinsuke has a crush on his classmate and gets her to play hooky with him on Valentine's Day.

Warning: Zero calories fluff, no spice, whatsoever.

He is so embarrassed to admit his own feelings, yet at the same time they're eating him alive. He's noticed the way others look at you and thinks it's impossible they misso out on what he sees; all that makes you brighter and more special than any other girl in Shouyou's class, and any other girl he'd ever had the luck of encountering. Only a fool would fail to realize your worth, and for that, he is scared the day might come when someone who isn't him will show up and sweep you off your feet- and God knows, he can never let that happen. Even if Gintoki or Katsura catch onto his affections, he has to step up and declare his intentions.

And so he does. Away from the eyes of his classmates and on a day with great importance to those in love. Of course, he'd never admit that he is in love with you. Little Shinsuke barely knows what such crude and complicated emotions mean. What he does know is that it's dangerous to let you be at school with the rest of your aspiring "suitors" or allow for your precious chocolate to be stolen by the likes of Gintoki. He's just trying his best to look out for you.

While the two of you walk to school-- your small hands surely enough gripping a box of chocolate meant for an unlucky fellow who wouldn't receive his treat-- he suggests you play hooky from school. Surprised, you ask him what's gotten into him; if there's a specific reason behind his request and if something's wrong. He doesn't bother explain, and tells you to simply follow him without asking more questions for the time being.

The two of you end up back to his house, and once he makes sure his father --at the very least-- isn't home, he motions for you to follow him inside.

You sneak past the gate and the servants who keep sweeping the dirt off the floors without being aware of your presence, and soon you make it to a large area of spreading greenery at the back of his estate. An abudance of wild flowers blossoms wildy and unruly below your feet, creating a wonderful field of color. Entranced as you are, your lips gap at the sight, fingers lightly caressing the overgrown leaves surrounding you.

"They are so beautiful, don't you think," you whisper.

He doesn't answer, but imitates your gesture of caressing a dark purpe flower, one as dark as his hair.

"You'd better get into work." He comments, bothering to explain only after you shoot him a look of utter confusion. "The gardener quit last week and father's furious over the state of these wild weeds," he distastefully says. "You should clean them up."

"But why?" You ask, half wondering why it must be you and why anyone would want to get rid of something this pretty. He only answers your first question, reminding you of a test paper you may or may not have copied from him, and how nothing prevents him from letting Shouyou know.

Without a real choice, you accept the task assigned to you and he hands you a pair of gloves and a pruning shear that casually happened to be lying around. You put them on and get into work, while he assumes a seat nearby the porch, spreading a book on his lap and throwing glances from time to time to see if you are doing as told.

It pains your heart to see the garden become naked, but at the same time you can't help yourself from smiling at the rapidly growing bouquet in your hands. All the colors of the world have gathered up, from sparkling yellows to subtle whites and fervent reds, each is more beautiful than the one before.

Working under the sun has you wiping the sweat off your forehead every three seconds, but even so, you find your shared time a lot more enjoyable than you initially thought it be. Sure, you spend it in utter silence, with only the sounds of stems being plucked and pages being flipped filling the space between you, and yet what you don't know iis that the reason for his quietness has nothing to do with the quality of a book he isn't even reading, or with him playing the role of an employer all too well. In reality, he just can't bring himself to take his eyes from you and knows that if he speaks, his voice will crack in such unnatural way that he'll make a fool of himself.

Once you finish piling up the dried leaves and headless stems, you walk up to him. He doesn't look at you right away- he finishes reading his page, flips his bookmark to the next and then raises his head, finding a bouquet greeting him from where your face ought to be.

"All done!" You speak behind it, and he can hear the smile in your voice.

"Hm..." He looks around, as if he wasn't aware you'd finished. "You did well," he barely admits.

"What are you reading?" You ask.

"Yesterday's notes."

"Kat-su-ra Ko-ta-" You turn your head upside down to read the label, but he pulls it away.

"Zura gave them to me. I was just comparing our answers." He justifies.

Ignoring the fact that you caught him red-handed, you instead smile at him gently. It hasn't been long since you became Shouyou's student yourself, and yet you'd managed to grow fond of him. He had quite the nasty temper and prefered dressing his true intentions in bitter words that matched his higher status, but behind all that lied a boy as devious and mischievous as the rest of you.

"Takasugi-kun," you say as you take a seat beside him, "why does your father not want flowers in his garden?"

He glances at you and then down at his dangling feet. "What's pretty is a distraction. He says samurai don't need to worry about stuff that isn't necessarry and offers nothing."

"But don't you think such life is boring?" You bring the flowers to your nose and take a whiff off the delicious scent. "Without beauty, what's left worth living for? My father says that if the Amanto win the war, nothing will be left for us to look at. Our trees will wither and our rivers will be drained-- then what reason will we have to smile? Doesn't your father consider that?"

Shinsuke takes a deep breath, unsure of what to answer. His eyes that were drawn to you with each chance were a testament to your words, but the viciousness in his father's eyes as he raisd his hand against him was etched all too well in his skin.

"The world will carry on either way," he mumbles.

Even if he hadn't kept you from going to school, you'd keep on blossoming the way you were supposed to, be it close to him or away from his sight. It was stupid of him to think his actions would have a different impact, especially when he couldn't be honest with either one of you.

However, while he took his time to sulk, you'd leaned closer to him and dropped the flowers in his hands, resulting to him flinching away as if an electric current passed through him.

"Then you should have them! Whatever my father or yours say, doesn't matter. When we are old enough, we can have our own rules and make the world how we want it to be. I know I want our world to be as pretty as these flowers!"

"You..." He says, straigthening his lips in a line and then pushing the bouquet in your direction. "You shouldn't give flowers to others this carelessly! Like I told you, a samurai has no use for them- I can't accept them."

"Then, how about these?" You trade the flowers for the chocolates, the ones you meant to give him much to his obliviousness all along. "Chocolate is food and without food even a samurai can die!"

Unable, or rather, unwilling to decline a seocnd time, he takes on the box and peers inside; heart-shaped delicacies are carefully stacked up between folds of wrapping paper, each being half the size of a thumb. He picks one and studies it under the sun as if it's a foreign object, while you pick another and push it to his lips.

"Aaa~" You taunt him, and with a look of grumpiness, he accepts. The sweetness melts in his mouth, his tongue watering for more, but when you attempt to feed him another, he glances elsewhere.

"I only took it so that you wouldn't be offended," he tells a lie not even he believes.

You toss the piece between your lips and lean back, your head hitting the wooden planks of the porch. For a February morning, the weather sure is warm enough for you to spend the remainder of your morning in his company. His eyes are glued to his book again, while yours gaze far into the sky and the clouds above, watching the sun gradually melt to softer shades of pink and orange.

Were you at Shoka Sonjuku now, sensei would be patting your heads and wishing you a safe journey like he always did. Hopefully you'd manage to escape the earful, come tomorrow. Sensei was a warm person, but he could be quite scary too.

It was time for you to go home.

You extend both arms in a lazy stretch and jump to your feet, remembering to pick up the flowers Shinsuke previously rejected. You announced your intentions to him and bid him farewell, only for your hand to be caught between a wilsome grasp of fingers.

"I'll walk you home, " he declares. "You shouldn't walk alone through the woods when it gets late."

"Is that part of a samurai's duty?" You tease, accepting his offer with an earnest grin.

He huffs under his breath, mumbling incomprehensible words, as your thumb applies pressure on his palm. There is a brief pasue where he looks up at you, and in that extremely brief moment, you swear to see the sunset peak across his cheeks in a shade that outshone those dancing between the clouds in the sky.

No more words are exchanged between you. His hand remains in yours and yours in his, while you make your way outside his garden, the front door, and the little pathway leading back into the forest, the two of you finding plenty of excuses to make stops along the way to extend your journey, without ever letting go of the other's hand.

[souglias]

I am here to yap a bit about this stupid fic. It's all gibberish but I wanted to put it out somewhere. If you haven’t read it yet, please read it first before you read the contents under the cut

I have some nice lines imo that I couldn’t include and they’re kind of interspersed with these gibberish that were just personal notes as to what i wanted to write for the whole fic in general and specific parts

OVERALL: nothing from that era exists anymore and you grieve over it and heal from it, both of you have changed because change is inevitable (yes even you), but it’s okay because just because things have changed doesn’t mean it’s lost. It just looks and feels different, but at the very core is the same. “You still crave lemonade, but the taste doesn’t satisfy you as much as it used to. You still crave summer, but sometimes you mean summer, five years ago.” PART ONE: you feel the end of an era in your life encroach from behind you, you worry about the change and if it will do more than sting, you wonder if you are grasping a little too hard, but you go anyway, all of you have things to do and places to go PART THREE: peace, sometimes the past comes back to haunt, both of you have changed, but that’s okay you have gotten used to it and no matter how things change you will and you are both here together in this city you can finally bring yourself to call home

(Yes, for part two that is the longest ironically there’s nothing fancy to describe it so i have left it out)

And idk i feel like ive made it very on the nose about the themes,,,, but aahHh I don't have the only have so little RAM in my brain left to work on this with my assignment

I wish I included Takasugi, I am idiot for having not included him bc he was supposed to be important to reader too BIG MISTAKE SHERRY such wasted 0-(-( Maybe I could update this story sometime in the far future because I know when I re-read this I will have shit to pick with it

Either that or I might write something with the same theme again but that risks being similar anyway-

Here are some songs I listened to:

PART ONE: 505 PART TWO: Space Song / The Night We Met PART THREE: My Love Mine All Mine Song that just happened to be there but does not necessarily fit the story: Kanashimigatomaranai I CAN'T STOP THE LONELINESS / Good Looking

I ended up saving some other similar genre songs to my playlist too HAHA dayum my Gintoki lovergirl era is really my saddest girl era for no reason HAHA

The other little things I kept bringing back was at least kind of noticeable (other than the strawberry milk AHAH)

Again, thanks for coming this far and reading my fic. I just wanted to spit out some words in hopes of alleviating what I'm feeling HAHA And writing Gintama fics always makes me so happy, it doesn't bother me that not many people are reading Gintama fics rn. I'll definitely be writing more (whether it'll be of this scale uhh we have to see HAHA short ones def though). Love you all <3

Remember To Throw Your Expired Milk [Gintoki]

Just because an era has passed, doesn't mean everything from then is lost.

c/w: self-indulgent, may have some timeline inaccuracies, mentions of the Joui War, mentions of injuries and scars

Gintoki x gn!reader (reader is implied to be smaller than him for a small part)

word count: 4.7k words (I'm sorry guys)

note: This fic serves an outlet for me, so when I mean self-indulgent, I really mean it!! Please let me know if you think I missed any content warnings. Border is a cropped frame from the Gintama The Final movie :)

cross-posted on AO3 (accessible from my profile)!

All likes and reblogs are appreciated!

The morning before you leave for the Joui war is a chilly autumn, with the last leaves barely hanging onto their branches. The four of you were to leave together: You, Gintoki, Takasugi and Katsura.

This particular morning, it is just you and Gintoki in the abandoned house that Takasugi and Katsura also lived in. Both of them have gone out for a bit. You didn’t know for what, but the house feels a little empty without the two.

Gintoki is keenly aware of you standing behind him, your eyes burning holes into his hands that are tightening his headband. He is about to attach his sword but decides to drop his hands to his sides instead, shaking them.

With his back still facing you, he spits, "Go back to Edo tonight. You have no use on the battlefield."

The monotonous banter, usually akin to a relentless fly, stings this time. It takes only a moment for him to realise the possible weight of his words. Tentatively, he looks over his shoulder at you. 

Gintoki doesn't know if he is more than a friend to you, but he would carry all your burdens and sorrow if it meant you wouldn’t enter the battlefield with them. If he has to choose his life or yours, he will choose yours. He would do anything if it meant that you would tease him about his natural perm or jab him playfully at his sides again. 

So, when he meets your unwavering yet melancholic gaze, he breaks the eye contact that barely lasts. His feet become a little heavier each time he sees you with that face. The more he trudges forward, the more he has to lose.

"I'm not useless. You know I can fight. Didn’t know you had such a shit impression of me."

You can, and you fight well. 

“But you don’t need to fight. You should protect your ass when you can and live. You’ve always been a scared kid anyway. Oh, who was the one who used to be intimidated by me?”

You retort back, but there’s no bite in it. “Shut your ass trap. I’m not chickening out now. You sound like the one who’s scared now.”

Gintoki’s heart is trembling. He sees the grim reaper preparing for its shift to make rounds and he does not want to see you among a pile of corpses. 

He flicks your forehead, takes your headband anyway and wraps it around your head. You too, carry the same pent-up fury from the Kansei Purge as everyone else. You have your grievances to air in your way too. Hell, if you asked him not to fight, he would have called you an idiot and ignored you.

His arms hover around your head as he ties a knot securely at the back of your head. Your head is almost on his chest, and his mind wanders to how close you are to him. 

“It hurts.”

“Ah, sorry.” 

His hands move to loosen your headband, but you rest one hand on his forearm to stop him. You stare straight into his chest and your free hand fidgets with the side of your pant leg. Gintoki realises that you are thinking about so much more than the headband. 

If he could even be audacious, he thinks he knows what you are thinking of. 

He tries to think of something to say. For a split moment, he even considers a hug. Even though it’s not something he has ever been good with. But before he gets to do anything at all, Takasugi creeps up from behind him.

“I can’t believe you guys. Getting all touchy-feely before the fight?” 

Gintoki immediately steps back, creating some distance between the two of you. He hurls some insults at Takasugi and the two of them bicker. When Katsura returns, instead of breaking up the fight, he joins in their nonsensical argument that is not even about the two of you anymore.

You take in this scene and etch it in your mind. This is the perfect time to have time halt if it is ever possible.

The four of you set out when it was time. As you attach your sword to your side, Gintoki comes up to you with his faux nonchalance. His eyes wander everywhere for a bit, one of his hands rubs the back of his head and the other seems to be lost on what to do. "You already know this, but do me a favour and buy me some strawberry milk on your next trip to the convenience store again. Keep them in the fridge.” 

He pauses as he watches your face shift from confusion to understanding.

“It has to be the Azuri brand one! Don't you dare drink it."

Your hand resting on the handle of your sheathed sword tightens.

“Okay, you better fucking come for it.”

Gintoki catches you with that melancholic smile again. He bumps your arm gently with his fist. Noticing you walk with less of a drag in your feet, he assumes it is good enough.

(You are always so difficult for him.)

Sometime towards the end of the Joui war, when the bodies all start to pile up and the soldiers are all weary, he loses sight of you. His eyes can no longer find the silhouette he has become so familiar with and his ears cannot find the rhythm of your steps that he has memorised by heart. You do not return to base when night falls. 

The voices all say you’re dead and gone, but Gintoki tries to protect the flickering flame of hope in his heart as he continues to fight. You promised him a carton- no, cartons of strawberry milk. You are far from stupid to take a promise to the afterlife with you. 

But when the Joui war ends, he disappears, just like everyone else. Along with the dying fire in his heart that he wilfully thought he could protect. Hope is a heavy thing to carry after all that has happened. 

The Amanto, who had kept you in a dark room for what felt like weeks, releases you into a world you are no longer familiar with. You find out that it’s only been days and that you were originally to be executed the next day. 

The sky is cluttered with more spaceships and the sun feels a little more cruel than you knew it to be. You walk with no aim, looking back now and then, thinking that you heard familiar voices. It goes on till the sight of the convenience store you frequented with your friends slowly pulls you back to reality. The weight of your emotions kicks in when you hear the welcome chime of the store. Your wounds start to weep and your muscles burn as you limp towards the refrigerator of cooled drinks. 

With a throat full of screams you bite back, and you place a few cartons of strawberry milk from the barren refrigerator of the convenience store into your arms. Large ones to keep in the fridge, small ones in the event he wants to bring it out. The counter staff asks you if you are okay while he packs your purchases, but you simply brush him off.

As you drag your unwilling feet into the town that spells a lonely journey into the future, the carton of strawberry milk treads too to its expiration date. 

(How naive of you, to think Edo would be the town you thought you could call home with everyone you cared about and the one man you loved.)

-

You wander within the city after you receive treatment, searching for a sign of anyone you know. Eventually, you traverse out of Edo. 

Whenever someone mentions the Four Heavenly Kings, you find your spirit to be lifted, only to be let down without fail. It is a name that strangers use so freely and carelessly. The four you know are now only legends, reduced to mere tales. They are unreachable, even as someone who has grown with them. You start to think maybe they are dead. Maybe you have just been searching for a time that has ceased to exist.

(Besides, you may have escaped death when you were released, but you think a part of you died that day too.)

It’s a long time before you force yourself to get your shit together. When you return to Edo, you see wanted posters of Katsura everywhere, the corners already peeling. One, hangs on by a small strip of tape, at a lamp post outside a humble ramen shop on the outskirts. You get a job at this ramen shop, and you stare at Katsura’s mugshot as you work until the poster gets blown away one day. With your pay, you get by and live in a simple rented apartment nearby.

When you finally bump into Katsura himself, you think you’re seeing the distant light at the end of the winding tunnel. He manages to fill you in on a bit, but takes off soon due to his predicament. The bare, discreet conversation you have with him ends up doing the opposite of what you hoped, whiffing out the little hope you carried instead. Sakamoto is assumed to be in space, which makes you a little relieved knowing he’s living his dream. But, the fact that the whereabouts of Gintoki and Takasugi are still uncertain makes you feel you’re still at square one. 

Despite the time that has passed, you still see Gintoki in many things. The Shounen Jump on the shelves. Any-fucking-one with their permed hair, even if it’s clearly artificial. And especially those fucking cartons of strawberry milk you keep. They are an anchor to your past and their tarnished, rusted edges dig into your skin. You want to throw them out so bad, but you can never bring yourself to. You stay at square one with these rotting cartons for the passing seasons.

On a chilly winter afternoon with snow that’s taking its time to fall, you find Gintoki when you pass through Kabukicho. Walking past Snack Otose, you catch a glimpse of a head of silver in your peripheral vision. 

You don’t recall when this… Yorozuya Gin-Chan came to be above Snack Otose. But you always pass Kabukicho in a hurry. Maybe it has always been there.

An old lady talks to him at his door, blocking him from your view on the ground floor. But you wouldn’t mistake that natural wavy perm of silver, even though all you see are strands peeking out from the sides of the old lady.

When she walks off with a face of frustration, you withdraw into a nearby alley in a flurry. You take in the scene of Gintoki with his exasperated look. He scratches his head a little and sighs, before he goes back inside. You take it as your sign to leave.

(Gintoki sees you. And he isn’t ready to talk to you either. Not with the way your fists clench. He immediately guesses what you’re feeling, if you have not changed immensely into someone different. He shakes away the urge to approach you and convinces himself again that just knowing that you are alive and warm is enough. He is content.)

The snow does not stop even when night falls. When Gintoki returns home, he turns the television on and stretches out with his feet propped up on his work desk. The doorbell rings and he sits up. His heart throbs, in anticipation for a certain someone. He tames it. Expectation is a potential recipe for disappointment.

When he opens the door, he finds you carrying two plastic bags. Your hands are very tightly wrapped around the handles. You refuse to look up at him.

“What? Asshole crawled back up from their grave? Not happy with what you got?”

You enter the house wordlessly and he shuffles out of your path. You drop the bags on the coffee table, causing a loud thud to resound in the room.

“Hey hey, the landlady downstairs is going to complain. She already came up bitching about the rent earlier this afternoon-”

“I owe you something. Did you forget?”

You pull a small carton of strawberry milk out of the bag and set it on the table. It is worn from weather and time. You rip open the top of the carton and the straw gets yanked out of the plastic, soon finding itself in the opening. 

Shoving the carton into his chest, you gather the courage to look him in the eye. The carton starts to wrinkle even more from your tightening grip. You hold it tighter, as if it would stop your tears from welling.

He notices the expiry date printed on the carton, which was more than one and a half years ago. His hand wraps around yours and he doesn’t let you slip them out.

“I don’t forget what people owe me that easily. Even if I died, I would demand for the guardians of hell to arrange a delivery to get them from you.”

Your grip loosens a little when you notice the soft, subtle smile on his face. There’s a lump in your throat again and you take a few deep breaths to stop it. The sound of the television fills the silence between the two of you for a bit.

“A little less than a year ago, I crossed paths with Zura. He told me both of you disappeared and didn’t know where you were.”

The next few words almost escape him. It makes you feel small and helpless to say it, even though he was right in front of you. “I thought maybe you died.”

A stray tear streaks down your cheek. He gently pries the milk from your hands and sets it down on the table.

(He thought you died too. Sure, without realising it, he started to carry hope in his heart again. But it felt like the weight of the world sometimes, and he had to carry it by dragging it across the ground. The possibility of you being six feet under rang so loud in his mind.

It only became lighter when he bumped into Katsura for the first time a few days ago. It was when he heard about you from Katsura. Gintoki headed down and watched you work in the ramen shop from the other side of the road. He left without approaching you. He didn’t know what he was going to say to you. Besides, seeing him could reopen old wounds and he didn’t want to do that to you. And just maybe, he was a little bit of a coward when it comes to you.

But he guesses it is all futile. You found him after all.)

With his thumb, he brushes your cheek. You notice scars on his arm that you don’t ever recall him having.

“You worry too much. It takes a lot to kill me.”

“But it hurt, didn’t it?”

It did. Even now, the wounds on his soul throb a little. He thinks he’s underestimated how much he missed you. “They’re just scratches.”

You inch towards him and put your arms around him for a hug. He tenses up at your touch, but he manages to loosen up and pats your back gently until you stop crying.

“Did you cry like that when you found Zura?”

“No.”

A stray smile tugs at the corner of his mouth. “Don’t waste your tears on Zura.”

“So you’re saying it’s worth it to cry for you?”

Gintoki’s eyes dart off in another direction. “No. Don't cry for me again.”

The way his sentence seemingly hangs thickens the air between the two of you. He scoffs and sits down on the sofa. Refusing to make eye contact with you, he rubs the back of his head and frowns.

He is still the Gintoki you committed to your memory and love. Even as time passes, he still has the same habits. Even though his fashion sense has changed, you still see him adorn the same shades. You can still see the pureness of his soul even with the haze of time. Despite the tears, you find a hearty laugh rising up your throat. So you let it out. 

He freezes upon hearing your laugh and realises that he has not heard something so genuine from you for so long, even from before the two of you parted.

As he runs his fingers through his natural perm for the last time and stands up, he suggests, “Let’s go to the supermarket. We should get new cartons.”

You glance at the clock. “Sorry, maybe not today. It takes a while to get to the supermarket and I need to get back to my apartment too. I live on the outskirts.”

“I’ll send you back. I have a scooter now.”

“Wow, I assumed you couldn’t pay rent. Where did you get the money for that? Did you rob a bank? It’s well within the capabilities of the White Yaksha.”

His eyebrow twitches. “Quit yapping and move along. I bargained hard and relentlessly for a lower price.”

As both of you make your way to the scooter, you continue to make more snarky comments about how he got the scooter. When you see the scooter, you decide to make some more comments about the scooter, though you actually think it is a fine thing. He smacks you on the head, eliciting a giggle from you instead of what he thought would be a retort.

“Your home is so damned far away, you know,” Gintoki complains as he turns on the engine.

“You were the one who offered.”

Without much thought, you tease him as you sit behind him, “Then, where should I stay? With you?” 

You realise what you’ve asked and you’re about to make a comment to brush it off. But Gintoki plops a helmet on your head before you can do so, and starts the scooter. As he begins to drive off, you place your hands tentatively on his waist. He throws a glance over his shoulder at you. “Hold on tight and don’t let go.”

It doesn’t take long for you to get used to your hand on him and he can feel your tense hands slowly relax. With his eyes on the road in front of him, he’s not 100% sure, but he thinks you’re leaning in a little.

(The scooter doesn’t go as fast as those flashy sports cars the rich use to zoom around town. But you still get to the convenience store a lot quicker than you expected. It’s too fast, you feel like you will never have enough time with him. 

Even though he is right in front of you, the lost time makes the vast distance between the two of you so clear. It is one that you cannot cross now with your arms, even if you gathered the courage to wrap them wholly and tightly around him. The thought that he might disappear again will gnaw at you for a while.

That night, he pays for the strawberry milk. The two of you take the last two cartons of the Azuri brand he very much prefers. You take your time to sip on it during the ride, watching his wavy hair let loose in the wind and catch the lights of the slowly dwindling traffic around you.)

-

Gintoki gives you a face when he looks up from the grocery bag on the coffee table. His eyes fill with incredulity and his lips downturn dramatically. "What is this?"

You put up an air of innocence, teasing in a sing-song voice, "What's what?"

"THIS!"

He pulls out a carton of milk from the grocery bag with two fingers gripping it and waves it around hysterically.

"This is plain milk!"

"You're stating the obvious."

He drops the carton back into the grocery bag and yells out in exasperation, hands grasping at nothing in the air. You stifle a laugh.

"Still gives you the protein that you so absolutely love in your strawberry milk, doesn't it?"

He plops down on the sofa and crosses his arms. Eyebrow twitching, he begins a lecture.

"Listen [name]. Plain milk is not the same as strawberry milk. Strawberry milk is NOT just syrup or sugar getting added into milk."

You nod, pursing your lips so as not to let out a laugh at the bewildering he says and the ones he might say. 

His doctor highly recommended that he cut down on sugar. Based on your internet searches, strawberry-flavoured milk has more sugar than plain ones. And because you love your boyfriend so much, you decide to take it into your own hands to buy plain milk which would be much better for his health. Watching him become exasperated over it is just a huge cherry on top.

Sensing that you found his reasoning ridiculous, he whines and throws himself face down onto his sofa. You don’t bother to suppress your laughter when he starts kicking his feet. 

Out of nowhere, he jumps off the sofa and slides his wooden sword into his belt. “You did this on purpose, didn’t you? You offered to buy it because you planned this, right? Because the doctor said I had to reduce my sugar intake.”

How dare you, his beloved, commit such an act of betrayal to him! He adds a little shout in between his rambling. Then, adds, “Sugar is life, [name]! We have to go buy them now!”

He tugs at your arm and you refuse to budge. Initially, you reason that he can’t leave the house because Yorozuya’s opening hours aren’t over yet. As he tugs harder, you start to mock him for having such a sweet tooth, how he’s weak for being unable to go by without strawberry milk and how ungrateful he is for you. He retorts back saying you shouldn’t have backstabbed your boyfriend like that, and there’s nothing sinful with having a sweet tooth. In the end, he lifts you by your waist with his arm and out of the house into the spring evening. Conscious of the looks of onlookers, you smack him on his back harder and harder till he complains about how it hurts and puts you down.

Gintoki continues to lecture you about the strawberry milk as the two of you walk to the convenience store that opened months ago. In the five-minute walk, you let him go on about the difference and hum now and then as an indication that you are listening. At the same time, you imagine the pink cherry blossom buds overhead. You imagine the falling sakura blooms around him. A mental image of the blossoms in his silver hair surfaces.

When he finishes his sentence, you comment, “I think you could be a strawberry parfait too.”

“Huh?”

It’s now your turn to talk in this walk and Gintoki sees the vision you’re having. He’s about to make a dirty joke, but you jab him at his side before he can say it.

When the two of you enter the store, he runs straight to the refrigerator. You trail behind him, already finding his arms full of large and small Maiji milk cartons although it has only been one minute. 

It has become normal for Gintoki to take the Maiji brand carton without a second thought. You can no longer find the Azuri brand milk in Edo anymore, and possibly the whole of Japan. It took him a little getting used to and some whining to you, but he has come to enjoy it. 

When you watch him try to arrange and squeeze everything into the basket, you think maybe your plan to help him cut down on sugar has backfired. He is simply trying to stock up at this point. You end up having to do some convincing in that narrow aisle, with some other shoppers, for this manchild to put a few back.

From the refrigerator to the cashier and back to Yorozuya, Gintoki keeps pouting. You poke his cheek with his free hand, but all you get is a “hmph”. He’s not going to give in so easily, it takes so much more than paying for his sweets and saying he looks like a strawberry parfait! 

You think about offering to pay for his parfait, but you tell yourself not to give in to him. You want him to live a long life and die of old age, not go out way before his time in agony because of sugar.

Gintoki plops down at the corner of the sofa when the two of you return to Yorozuya. He starts reading the latest copy of Shounen Jump with one leg crossed on the sofa, sipping loudly on his milk in an attempt to irritate you. You sit on the other corner with your drink and magazine you bought yourself earlier, and you prop your feet on top of his lap. He smacks your feet once, but he lets you be as he always does. On other days, he enjoys doing it to you too. 

Every now and then, you look up to see him engrossed in his manga. Sometimes when you blink, you still see images of the past versions of him. 

You get up and give him a kiss on the cheek, before heading to the stairs outside. He’s a bit caught off guard, but you leave him to process it.

On the street downstairs, a few kids scramble around, presumably to head home. Your mind wanders to the three boys you grew up with. There are still days you think you wake from your nap in the classroom to the three boys duking it out in the dojo. But when your bleary vision in the morning clears and you notice that the ceiling above is different from the one at Shoka Sonjuku, reality settles. It’s just a ruckus made by some kids outside. You stare at the ceiling, remembering that Takasugi is at large with his new comrades. You remember that Zura now has his own faction, which both you and Gintoki reject his relentless invitations to. You remember that Shoyo-sensei is gone. 

You hear the sliding door open behind you and Gintoki leans on the part of the ledge beside you. 

“What’s up?”

“Nothing.”

Gintoki notices you running your finger back and forth on the grooved surface of the ledge. He places a kiss on your temple. A little hesitant at first, but he goes for it. He then shifts behind you slightly, resting his hand on top of yours. With his steady frame behind you, you lean back a little on him. 

(Gintoki wonders what Shoyo-sensei would think about the two of you. Hopefully, he approves, even though Shoyo had witnessed him disturbing you in class and outside of it. Hell, Shoyo even thought Gintoki was bullying you at one point and Gintoki had gone to lengths to prove otherwise. He would also argue that he was teasing you to get you to break out of your shell. Though in hindsight, maybe he had been a little mean about a few things.)

The wish to return to the bygone days still squeezes your heart with its agony. The days that Shoka Sonjuku was your home. Its invisible hands still try to grasp at the memories that are becoming ever-distant and drifting away in the stream of time. It is always the worst when you find resemblances that you find hard to ignore.

But everyone has found their place in this new era, including you. The night he dropped you off after reuniting, he asked you’ll come to Yorozuya again. You said you’d try, but no promises because it was far. Though, as you watched his receding figure ride back into the brightly lit town you once detested, you knew you would. 

You found a place with Gintoki. A place, in this still unfamiliar city, that you can finally bring yourself to call home again. 

If you've come this far, thank you so much for reading this self-indulgent, monster of a fic <3

[banapricot]

Through blatantly contradicting itself, installing a revolving door in the Fourth Wall, and almost never taking itself seriously, the world of Gintama became one where everything is Real and nothing is True.

In an unrelated post I said ‘If you acknowledge the Prototype Yorozuya’, because while it’s very clearly a ridiculous joke we have no reason not to believe it. 90% of the entire show is a joke, that doesn't make it any less meaningful. Just look at the Memory Loss arc; a plot device everyone uses to make fun of Gintoki that is also utterly heartbreaking. 

The Timeskip arc, with every plot twist dumber than the last, sheds light on integral characteristics of everyone’s personality. Everything mentioned in the ‘Joui reunion’ can not have logically happened, yet ‘Kuroko’ showing up means it did. The Renho arc played out right in front of us but does Elizabeth actually look like a human man under that maybe-costume? 

This even applies to the main plot: We know how Takasugi lost his eye, but he was revealed to have lost it in a fight on a rooftop years before. Against a recurring antagonist that seemed to be the Final Boss, except he never even existed. The fake movie trailer was endorsed by the protagonist, so while the movie is fake maybe the scene isn’t, if you don’t want it to be. 

Shouyou is dead; He’s alive and immortal. Utsuro is gone; He’s a child. 

Everything is imaginary and nothing is false. 

[writing-badger]

Twitter Polls Make For The Bloodiest Battlefields - Chapter 2

There Aren't As Many Voice Actors As You Would Think

1 (Previous Chapter) • 2 • 3 • 4 • 5 • 6 • 6.5

Pairing: Sakata Gintoki x Reigen

Summary: Anime Twitter was thrown into chaos. Thirty-two "DILFs" were thrown into a merciless battle to find out who truly encapsulated the title of Dad I'd Like to Fuck. Two competitors begin to wonder whether the battle is worth it and maybe, just maybe, they can overcome their differences to find a way out.

Word Count: 2,904

Warnings: Too many DILFs

Gintoki is under no illusion as to what a DILF is. After all, he is a man of culture, as a certain hair-cutting samurai would say. He keeps thinking about any possible reasons as to why he might have been chosen. He does have a rather impressive chest, although this is mostly because the animation staff started putting more budget into him rather than an effort on his part. He used to be more like a noodle, limp and unimpressive. Maybe his upgrade in appearance appealed to a certain demographic, but his personality should have been a major turn-off. Right? What sort of father would fight his daughter over who gets to eat the last piece of dog food? 

 But then again, in a DILF contest, does personality even matter?

 If not, then he might actually stand a chance. With newfound confidence, he materialises into a white void that is almost completely empty save for a large figure a short distance away. 

 This confidence is immediately smashed into a thousand tiny, tiny pieces as he gets a closer look at the man. From just the bright red hair and daunting size, Gin immediately knows who he is looking at. How could he ever entertain the idea of being more fuckable than Shanks? Not that he would ever admit it out loud, but he used to re-read Shanks' chapters over and over again knowing that he wouldn't be seen for years on end. 

 Gintoki is completely frozen as he looks at one of the most fearsome and stunning pirates in manga, like a child meeting their hero. Meanwhile, Shanks is sitting on the floor, one leg stretched out and his back resting against an invisible wall. His head is lowered slightly as if he is sleeping, his hair swaying lightly as if being rustled by a breeze. His cloak covers most of his body, hiding the impressive sword that is always by his side.

 You would think that, with his previous crossover experience, Gin would be handling this like a professional but he is absolutely not. 

 This situation is unlike anything he has ever done before. Usually, he was just being isekaied into a fantasy world, hijacking time-slots, or hiding in the background of films. Having the Red-Haired Shanks sitting in front of him is nothing like running around with those Sket Dance punks who tried to leech off of his popularity. And then their creator then had the audacity to slander Sorachi in a different manga. Gin-san may not like school festivals, but he did not let his youth go to waste. He was busy fighting wars against amanto and trying to tame his unstained hair. He swears that if he ever meets that obnoxious ogre, he’s going to give the loser a piece of his mind. 

 “You know,” a smooth voice suddenly rings out, drawing Gintoki’s gaze over to Shanks, “with such a sour look on your face, it would be easy to mistake you for an enemy.” From underneath his hair, Gin can see a single eye trained on him like a tiger waiting to attack. A shiver crawls up his spine as he quickly tries to look as defenceless as possible.

 “Oh no, no,” Gin quickly says, waving his hands slightly to try and show he means no harm, “I’m just a big fan of yours and, well, you’re a lot more intimidating in real life than in the ma… um… on your wanted poster.”

 At this, Shanks stands up and Gintoki has to strain to look up at him. For a moment, he wonders if this was how Takasugi felt all the time, but he quickly brushes the thought from his head. He really doesn't need those kinds of thoughts coming back right now. Instead, he focuses on the pirate's face, finding that it looks so much more defined and handsome than he remembered. The three iconic scars run over his left eye, only adding to his appearance. When he was younger, Gin had tried to convince Zura to give him similar wounds, although Shoyo immediately put a stop to it. For a second, he lowers his eyes as he tries to push the memory away, but he ends up being eye level with Shanks's tastefully exposed chest. The loose-fitting shirt leaving very little to the imagination. It takes a lot of willpower for Gin to tear his gaze away. 

 There is an icy silence as sweat begins to bead on Gin's forehead. All it would take is a single blast of Conqueror’s Haki for Gintoki to be knocked into oblivion and, if Shanks knew what Gin was thinking, he would probably never wake up again. 

 And then Shanks starts to laugh. It starts off as a rather light laugh but, within seconds, the sound is booming around the room as Shanks tries to calm himself down a little.  

 “Sorry about that,” Shanks says, “it’s just I’ve never seen someone looking so angry while barefoot.”

 Gin quickly looks down at his feet, noticing that his shoes are missing, probably still back with Kagura and Shinpachi. He’s lucky that this is just a fanfic, otherwise, he would have to worry about his feet pictures being shared on some sketchy website. If people want his feet pic, then he is going to make a profit off of them. They are his feet after all.  

 “Oh,” he says as he wriggles his toes, almost as if he is surprised to see them. 

 “You didn’t even notice, huh?” Shanks says with a smile, his icy mood completely melting away. Gin, meanwhile, is thanking his Ketsuno Ana Zodiac Reading that he didn’t immediately make an enemy out of a fearsome pirate. 

 “Well, you know how it is with being teleported into a blank void and all that.”

 “And it looks like we aren’t the only ones,” Shanks says as he gestures to something behind Gintoki. 

 Turning around, Gintoki spots a strange floating light that slowly morphs into the shape of a man. And then another, and another. It seems that whatever happened to them is quickly ramping up in scale. By the time the lights stop appearing there are thirty-one men, many of whom look extremely confused and wary. 

 Gin ends up recognising a lot of them, and for the most part, he appreciates the taste of whoever organised the competition. Kurosaki Isshin is often an overlooked hottie due to that loser Aizen and his stupid glasses reveal that still lives in Gin's mind rent-free.

A couple of the choices are odd for an Anime contest… Dracula, for example, is standing in the corner glaring at every single person that moves. Firstly, he's from a videogame, and if you wanted to push it, a Western animation. But neither of these things are technically anime. Not that he isn't hot, it's just that Gin would be a little bit annoyed if he won and it's not like the guy needs the money. He lives in a castle while Gin struggles to pay rent for his flat.

 Some of the others haven’t even been in an anime yet, standing out with their strangely papery appearance, although he can't deny that it adds some charm to Kishibe. Not that Gin was paying particular attention to him or anything, he's not getting involved with any character that works with any government-sanctioned agency. He just knows how to respect and appreciate his elders… as long as they aren’t trying to squeeze rent out of him. 

 What stands out most to Gin is the fact that, of all the DILFs in anime, Ikari Gendo is standing there as if he is meant to be a part of this group. How could anyone who wears shades every second of the day think that they look cool? Worse still, Gin can’t even openly criticise his inclusion after what happened between him and Hasegawa. They are practically the same man with the only difference being their employment status. It makes Gin feel a little bit nauseous inside. If he ends up hearing Hasegawa’s voice coming out of Ikari’s body then he might just die on the spot.  It also makes him wonder about all those other fathers that could have been chosen… like Oscar Vessalius or Joseph Joestar. How on earth did Joseph not make it? Sure his grandson is standing off to Gin’s left, but what about his grandfather with his striking good looks and perfect voice, huh?

 Gin has to take a moment to calm himself down as he continues to keep an eye on the other competitors. Thankfully, for the most part, everyone seems calm, but there are a couple of loose canons that could cause an untold amount of damage if left unchecked. A loud buzzing sound rings through the space. A couple of the men look startled while others don't respond at all. 

 “Welcome, gentlemen, to the Ultimate Anime DILF Awards,” a robotic voice states, crispy static overlaying their words, “we are waiting for our final contestant and then the competition shall begin.” The static sound abruptly cuts off, leaving the room in silence. A couple of the men have gathered in groups, mostly based on people who they already know. Gin is still standing relatively close to Shanks, but tries to keep some distance so that he doesn’t make a complete fool out of himself. 

 As he is standing there, a man in a festival mask walks over to him, Gin immediately recognises him from Kimetsu no Yaiba but remains quiet. He can’t afford to have the others figure out that he knows who most of them are, it would be more than a little suspicious. 

 Hey guys, don’t worry. I'm from a parody anime and know who most of you are. Oh, by the way, a couple of you are going to die soon. I hope we all get along! 

 It took all the strength in his body to not go and warn Minato of what was coming his way when he first caught a glimpse of him. He doesn’t even know if it would change anything… like would it create a parallel reality where Naruto was raised by his father. Would he become fed up with his dad spending more time at work than with him, becoming bitter and desperate for attention? Would Naruto become like Boruto?

 Gintoki shudders at the thought. 

 Someone really needs to say something and save Gin from the mental spiral that he is falling into as he begins to rewrite the entirety of Naruto in his head. 

 “You know,” a voice pipes up from the other side of the room, “I’m not sure how I got here. But I was on a space station about half an hour ago and I really need to get back.” The man who is talking is Ishigami Byakuya. He has all the makings for a strong leader, something that he has put into practice many times before and, out of all the people standing in the white void, he is probably one of the most traditionally qualified. But he is also completely out of his depth. “So does anyone know either where we are, or how we got here?”

 “It appears that we are in a pocket reality,” Ryūken says after being nudged on the shoulder by Isshin, “I have no intention of playing along with this farce though, so stay out of my way.” He quickly adds this on while glaring at the bearded man next to him.

 “Come on Ishida, we all want to go home,” Isshin reminds him, “I hope my two little princesses are doing alright. They must be so worried about their dad.”

 “I’m sure they’re celebrating their newfound freedom.”

 This immediately silences Isshin who has a look of horror spreading across his face. Clearly what the Quincy just said has stepped over a line, but at least it gets the group back on track rather than Isshin rambling on about his kids for the next twenty minutes. 

 “We should try and figure out who is behind this,” a different, yet similar voice says. Gintoki looks over at Minato who exudes an aura that most people would struggle to match. It’s a reasonable suggestion, but his point is completely ignored as Leorio quickly points out something that a couple of the other men have also noticed. 

 “Hey, why do you,” he says gesturing to Minato, “and him,” he gestures to Isshin, “sound exactly the same?” His insinuation is clear, he thinks that they could be working together or are some sort of contraption there to trick them. It’s not an unfounded assumption, but it is a categorically wrong one. 

 Gintoki quickly realises how this line of thinking could devolve into suspicion and anger, but there is no way he calm the situation down without being even more suspicious. 

 “Well, we could say the same about you and the astronaut,” an older voice says, “so we shouldn’t be pointing fingers.” Masaoka Tomomi may technically be an enforcer, but he was a detective before that; one who believed in looking beyond the simple black-and-white answers. Thankfully his more advanced age also seems to settle the nerves of the younger men, but not everyone is happy to go along with this.

 “I don’t really care about what you monkeys do,” a smooth voice says, “but do not tell me what to do.” Getō Suguru is not the type of man you want to be stuck in a small space with at the best of times and, right now, the times are not looking good.  

 “Well aren't you just asking for a beating,” a different man states but he clearly recognises the jujutsu sorcerer. Gin nervously looks over to see a well-built monster of a man confidently walking towards the sorcerer. If Getō is a landmine, then Fushiguro Toji is going to be the foot that sets it off. “And since this is a contest, then surely a couple of people are going to die. So why not start with you?”

 “Those are big words coming from someone who’s already d-“

 Without thinking, Gintoki cuts into the argument; physically acting as a blockade while also causing Getō to stop talking out of surprise. Perhaps he wasn't expecting the barefooted man to be the one trying to act brave. Of all the people in the room, he is definitely on the weaker side, meaning has a lot to lose if the two start fighting.

 “You really should listen to the detective,” he says; sweat dripping off his forehead as both men keep getting closer. “Fighting won’t get you anywhere.”

 “The samurai’s right,” Shanks says as he backs Gintoki; his imposing aura making the two freeze in place. That and the large sword that is currently pointed at Getō’s throat stops him from being able to relax. On the other side, Minato has Fushiguro locked in place and unable to take a single step. A kunai is resting against the man's temple as a threat.  

 After a couple of minutes, the two begin to calm down. Or, at the very least, they stop staring at each other like wild animals. Minato puts his kunai back while Shanks sheaths his sword in a fluid motion. Gintoki, meanwhile, feels his legs nearly give out underneath him.

 As he manages to shuffle off to the outer edge again, he finds Jotaro walking over to him with a slightly suspicious look on his face. 

 “You sound familiar,” Gintoki pauses for a moment. Of all the people that would recognise his voice, he didn’t expect it to be one that hasn’t technically heard him before. 

 “We haven’t met,” Gin says, trying to play it cool. Jotaro is a potential problem if he comes to believe that he’s trapped within an enemy stand. While Jotaro doesn’t seem to quite believe him, he lets the topic slide. Gin can’t help but briefly curse whoever cast Sugita in the role of Joseph Joester for making his life more difficult than it needs to be. 

 Feeling his mood beginning to slip again, he thinks of the positives that come with this situation. Like he can go and gloat to Shinpachi and Kagura that he met Jotaro and that the Red-Haired Shanks defended him. Of course, he would embellish a little to make it sound more impressive, and they wouldn’t really care. But just picturing their faces, eyes rolling back in annoyance, makes him feel a little bit better. 

 Gin is so distracted that he doesn't notice the final contestant arriving until the robotic voice informs the group that the competition has officially begun. As Gin's eyes jump around the room, trying to figure out who it is, they fall on a familiar man.

 Reigen Arataka.

 Gintoki would recognise him anywhere. How could he not? The so-called Greatest Psychic. The man stole Gin’s entire schtick of odd-jobber, and then somehow became more popular. His entire identity is just a cheap rip-off of everything that Gin worked hard to achieve. A man who wouldn't know fashion if it whacked him in the face with a baseball bat. The fraud even stole Gin’s birthday, one that he definitely didn’t steal from Naruto. 

 You know those things Gin said about not fighting, yeah? They are long gone as he glares at the golden-haired man. Gin is officially out for blood and he will see the supposed Twink Supreme obliterated. 

Next Chapter

Read on Ao3

[sparks-joy-imagines]

Hola! \(^_-)/ May i request a HC's of Joui 4 catching their crush masturbating and moaning their name while making such erotic expression?😏 like they suddenly barge in their rooms 'cause they thought she got hurt?

hi anon, thank you for requesting and sorry for taking so long! I had so much fun writing this😏 -niob

Joui 4 catching their crush masturbating

Gintoki:

thanks to a neighbour who apparently has left their water running the whole night, your apartment got flooded and you were forced to leave for at least a month so it could get rebuild

unfortunately, it was not easy to find a place, but Gintoki was kind enough to let you stay at his place

after four weeks with almost no privacy due to Gintoki’s small home, you decide to use his and the kid’s absence to get rid of some pent-up stress

totally caught up in your little fantasy while touching yourself, you did not notice how Gintoki comes home earlier than planned

Gintoki enters the apartment, happy that he was able to get out of the job earlier and would now be able to laze around the rest of the day

weird noises from the room next door make Gintoki freeze on the spot, and he attentively listens to determine the source

he hears a muffled noise followed by his name, causing mild panic rise in his chest

were you hurt? did you just call him for help?

he barges into the room without a second thought, yelling, “y/n, are you okay?!”

you were okay, in fact you were doing pretty well until you suddenly were disturbed during a very intimate activity…

Gintoki needs a whole ass second to realise what is going on and what you were doing

during this time, you have already covered your body with a big blanket while squealing loudly and turning away from him

he is totally shocked, his face burning up as he tries to bring out a word, but they are stuck in his throat

he is so shell shocked that he only moves when you yell at him to get the fuck out

he slams the door shut, but keeps standing in front of the closed door, still processing what just happened

when his brain finally functions again, he deadpans asks you through the closed door if you need any help with what you are doing

when you face each other again after the incident he pretends nothing ever happened if you do the same, but if you show how embarrassed you are he will grin at you and ask you what happened that you act so weird in the most innocent voice he can muster

Katsura:

after getting chased through half the city by the Shinsengumi again and finally losing them in the area of your residence, he decides to slip into your house, without knocking or using the bell (just like a real criminal)

he plans to just lay low for a bit until everything has calmed down, expecting you to not be home anyways and he would surely be long gone when you get back

he lets himself fall down on your couch in the living room, only to jump up again when he suddenly hears weird noises

he doesn’t dare to move an inch, highly concentrated on listening into the apartment

nnghh… there, again! Katsura turns to where he believes the sound came from and finds himself in front of your bedroom door

what or who could this be, he wonders; you should be at work right now… that means… a burglar?? rage raises in his chest at the thought of someone (other than himself) breaking into your home and he takes a step back, his hand already resting on his katana, ready to finish the bold intruder at sight

ahhh… Katsura!… he hears through the door, and this time he recognises your voice

his body relaxes, he just stares at the door, not knowing what was going on, you were home it seems… wait… you just called his name, right? you were calling for him!

he slams the door open, while shouting your name, half a second later an incredibly high-pitched scream almost deafened him and stumbles backwards, almost falling over

you were under the covers quicker than he could see what was going on

“WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING HERE?!?! GET THE FUCK OUT!!!”, you scream

totally confused he follows your command and gets out of your bedroom

you later give him a lecture about not breaking into your house ever again

Takasugi:

lost in his thoughts Takasugi wanders through the spaceship, unexpectedly hearing his name when he passes by the door to your private quarters

undetermined what to do he just keeps staying in front of your door

did you actually call him? he is not sure, there was no way for you to know that he just walked by your door

after a short while he decides to just ignore it and continue his little walk through the ship, not even sure anymore if he really heard his name, maybe he misheard it

but after taking two steps he could hear it again: his name and followed by some weird, strangled noises

he takes two steps back, now standing in front of your door again, shamelessly eavesdropping to find out what is going on with you

a muffled whimpering followed by a wailing sound convinces Takasugi that something must be wrong, maybe you got hurt and couldn't get up?

Takasugi knocks at the door, softly saying your name but instead of an answer another wailing sound was audible

you were in need of help he was sure of it and opens the door, but the scene unfolding in front of his eyes was a different one: lying on the futon, one hand shoved down your panties, the other clawed into the bedsheets, your kimono open and loose, revealing your breasts as well as your stomach

utterly shocked to suddenly see Takasugi standing in your door you sit up instantly, not even able to make a real sound and scrambling around to cover yourself with whatever was available

Takasugi turns around on the spot, slamming the door shut behind him, distancing himself from your quarters with fast steps, trying his best to ignore the image that is now stuck in his brain

he pretends this never happened and also won't ever try to talk about it, but he might recall the image in his head when he feels a bit lonely (read: horny)

Tatsuma:

in order to celebrate a big business deal, the Kaientai are having a little party on the spaceship

on his second beer Tatsuma notices your absence and asks around if anyone has seen you; apparently, you were not in the mood to drink and left earlier

not very happy with the answers he got, Tatsuma puts the alcohol down and leaves to get you and celebrate together with you, even if that means he has to drag you out of your room

he arrives in front of your door, lifting his hand, but a weird noise coming from inside stops him from knocking against it

he listens carefully, one ear pressed against the door

a loud whine makes him jump back in surprise and causes the mental picture of you being hurt and in pain forming in his head

suddenly overwhelmed with worries he attempts to open the door, almost slamming himself into it due to it being unexpectedly locked

he runs off to grab the spare key and hurries back to your room to open the door

you shriek up, screaming, not able to wrap your mind around what just happened and how someone was able to open the door you have for sure!! had locked earlier

it took a brief moment for you to even realise who was suddenly standing in front of you while you were naked from the hips downwards, only wearing a big shirt, that was given to you by Tatsuma a while ago (because someone barfed on yours and you had nothing to change into)

you hurriedly cover your lower body with your blanked, not able to look up or knowing how to explain yourself when you remember that HE barged into YOUR room which was even locked

“GET OUT!”, you yell with a shaking voice, burning cheeks and still not able to look up

Tatsuma certainly did not expect THIS, but it does not take him long to realise what you’ve been doing and what you are wearing while you do it and it undeniable turns him on

your high-pitched voice brings him back to the reality that he disturbed you and he stumbles back, mumbling some apologies and getting out, but not without taking a last glance at you how you sit curled up on your bed with his shirt on

[agroupofcrows]

bansai spider?? 👁️👁️

TL;DR im funny in the head and think that strings=threads and automatically mean web, which necessitates a spider. the post is me failing to decide whether that spider is takasugi, bansai or both

oh lol. welcome to the 'i enjoy my media overanalysed' segment🕸 fun fact i swore to never write this kind of long meta post with manga panels oh how the goddamn turntables

spiderweb in gintama is introduced (via jiraia) as a double metaphor for deathtrap and... social network. then sorachi consistently uses the web/threads symbolism as something that:

1. helps you remain [a person belonging on this plane of reality = a character belonging in this story/genre] (ok MAYBE jirocho's kiseru is more wheel of life than spiderweb but allow me, they look really similar. see spiderwebs in utsuro's cell vs. that wheel when he gets out and starts killing)

2. but also (or eventually) kills you. which is the same thing: it's a nice and rare shoyo-utsuro pov, or maybe Nameless Pre-gintoki Thingie pov. They are characters that do not belong in yorozuya gin-chan's shonen comedy, whether we like it or not.

NOW shamisen: weaving a tale or a melody or a web, or a little scheme, mayhaps a plot. maybe the downfall of the government or a requiem for a ghost that overstayed its welcome, idk. music and strings (and bards. and sometimes spiders) have metanarrative quality

(((flashback to gintoki taking up a shamisen to exorcise the ghost onsen, unrelated but equally hysterical brief contemplation over fact that shamisens used to be made with either cat or dog skin, of which gintoki is both, thank you for your patience.)))

anyway a shamisen has strings and strings are threads, so there has to be [clown music as you decide to stop reading after all] a spider. i think the web is the kiheitai and takasugi is the spider.

permanent damage to my mental health: 1) bansai holding the strings for 'shinsuke' 2) takasugi playing in duo with bansai...

in my interpretation, bansai went to SC thinking that gintoki was a carcass and removing him from shinsuke's horror story, sorry, political scheme, would be routine web maintenance. except the reader already knows that yoro-zuya gintoki is Thee spider... postSC could have been bansai's coming to terms with being just. part of the web? im not sure because SHAMISEN DUOS

anyway we've arrived at bansai's death scene which is about *drumroll* takasugi! it has nothing to do with bansai, it's a character moment for takasugi. (i m fine. it's fine. tbh, i think bansai was fine too? he made his death look so effortless. i think he's loved very much)

ok so maybe im going nowhere but regarding that a few dozen amanto did very much die right after this panel,,, idk. does this look like prey stuck in a web. im having feelings

[seal7035]

about joui3 and friendship(spoiler)

These punky adults are living in my head rent-free. They have known each other since young, shitty brats with the attitude of a mower. They shared the same school, same spirit, same teacher... It was just the good old days and when tragedy struck, all 3 went to war. Then friend-to-friend camaraderie turned into absolute trust, of people who entrust their own lives to other comrades to fight side-by-side on battlefields, “your life is my life” kind of thing. Imagine that kind of bond then one day they just... broke off. Something happened and that tie was irreversibly damaged. 10 years passed, they reunited, but not as friends(except for Katsura and Gintoki). Oh no, they became mortal enemies and would probably skewer each other on sight. I mean, Gintoki and Takasugi did. Slash, stab, a few limbs would have gone flying if not for plot amour. They screamed anguish more painful than any wound blades could inflict. And when finally, FINALLY, these brats in adult’s bodies were on speaking term... one of them fucking died! At Gintoki’s own hand! Bloody dammit this show! 

But what I was trying to say is... dramatic as joui3′s story is, it kinda resembles some of our real-life friendship. Not the “kill you on sight” thing, but the fact that we come across and befriend many people in our lifetime. Some are attached to us by the hips. However, as much as your anime boys like to shout about eternal friendship and life-long commitments, the fact is, eventually people would go separate ways. Maybe you keep in touch and meet up once in a while, but maybe not as close as you used to be because everyone has their own life to take care of now. In some cases, one day you talk to a friend and another day received a notice of his/her funeral. It was bittersweet, and it can be distressing to think about at times. 

It’s the beauty about relationships in this show, and many other shows I have come across. It strips away the sugarcoating in the present and presents to us the poignant core in the future. The status quo will change. Nothing lasts forever. As our silver-haired samurai painfully articulated, “Life doesn’t have to be fun. I just want you to live”. Even if he had uttered it in a fit of despair, it does speak to Yorozuya’s situation. Shinpachi and Kagura are still young, they have an entire life ahead of them and will inevitably choose their own paths. Not to mention, as a Yato, Kagura would naturally outlive most of the cast. Will she have new friends then? Will she forget the trio of misfits and move on with her life? I don’t think so. She will move on, I believe that, but she won’t forget. Just as the Joui3 never forfeit the old days as much as they want to say otherwise. When all the conflicts died down was when the sentiments from all those years ago resurfaced. Almost too easily, those brats in adult form were bickering again, even only for a while, to rekindle the spirit still flickering in each of them. So that when it went awry and it was time to say goodbye, they could return to simply be the three brats of Shouka Sonjuku. 

Is this show trying to give us the resolution to deal with friends we have lost touch with? I don’t know. With the Gorilla author kept throwing around poop jokes and breaking the 4th wall, I don’t think he was aiming for anything so philosophical. The message to appreciate people in your life is certainly there, though. 

“Even if where you are now is beneath the sky you don’t recognize, even if where you are now is beneath a sky without us, please don’t cry. Because we are always with you...  beneath your sky.”

[regnigt]

Gintama shortfic - Joui Four

I wrote this shortfic for the Chocolate Box Exchange over on AO3, now reposting it to Tumblr. It's a Joui Four shipfic, poly. Rated PG for language and sexual situations. Title: The Opposite of the Opposite of the Unexpected, Times Four Characters/Pairing: Gintoki/Katsura/Takasugi/Sakamoto Summary: Things each of the Joui Four are not terribly known for: the silence of Sakamoto, the languor of Katsura, the gentleness of Takasugi, and what of Gintoki...? Rare glimpses, given to precious few. Author's Notes: This piece is not always terribly precise in its setting, but when it talks about Takasugi you can mostly assume it's from wartime unless otherwise noted, while the time setting can be more ambiguous for the other three. Vague spoilers for the final arc. Concrit and other feedback welcome and appreciated.

The silence of Sakamoto

Sakamoto always seem to be noisy somehow, his words and laughter ringing out louder than anybody else’s. Quiet in Sakamoto terms means talking in a soft voice, mumbling, humming; intimate and close, but still not silent. Like the times when he washes and combs Zura’s hair sometimes, showing greater facility with the task than the other two, who got oddly hostile the very first time, as if they were jealous. Zura was just delighted with it. Sakamoto was more quiet than usual, then, but he was still humming and sometimes erupted into small talk.

Gintoki and Takasugi might say crassly that he only ever shuts up when he’s either asleep or has someone’s cock in his mouth. But in the former case, he still snores half the time – as Zura will point out – and in the latter, he will suck and slurp and pant so enthusiastically that ‘silence’ still doesn’t seem the right word. A truly silent Sakamoto is an outlandish idea.

But it does still happen. There are times when Sakamoto watches the autumn leaves tumbling down, or the stars starting to light up on the night sky, and says nothing, eyes pensive, with a boundless faith in his smile. Gintoki thinks he looks very comely in those moments, but he is still always relieved the next moment, when Tatsuma starts talking. Whether he says something dumb and crass or thoughtful and yearning, just the sound of his voice is nice. Gintoki, for his part, does not much like it when Tatsuma is silent. Sometimes those deep blue eyes seem to see right through Gintoki all too clearly.

Most usually, though, a silent Sakamoto is only caught in the corners of their eyes, as he watches the others with warm eyes, perhaps stretched out on a futon waring nothing at all. That fleeting silence may end quickly. Gintoki tends to get self-conscious and embarrassed when he notices, making him go, “What? Why are you looking like that? What’s on your mind?” which just makes Sakamoto laugh. Zura on the other hand doesn’t seem to mind, but he does get more blushy and giggly than usual when Sakamoto is being silent. As for Takasugi, he just gives Sakamoto a long, unsmiling languid stare right back, then huffs and turns to his pipe or his shamisen.

***

The languor of Katsura

Katsura is all diligence and dutifulness, as a wartime leader, as a postwar revolutionary, even as an energetic boke full of strange radio waves. Even he can be tired sometimes, limbs heavy and eyes bleary; in fact, it is often only when he’s already worn down that he gets softened enough for a roll in the hay, persuaded in the small hours to indulge in such a luxury. He still tries to do his bit dutifully to please his partner or partners, and is the one most likely to direct the others when they are more than two. Gintoki seems to take it as a personal challenge to “get Zura to let go more”, which can awaken Takasugi’s competitiveness. Sakamoto just laughs about it, and that’s probably what makes Zura relax the most, in the end.

But in the morning, he is always the first one awake, futon neatly rolled away, already busy eating breakfast – or, in war days, giving his men the first orders of the day outside the tent – by the time anyone else is rubbing his eyes with morning-heavy head. He is not a man who believes in lingering in bed.

In his late twenties, Zura will start to discover laziness, usually while playing videogames or spending idle times on the internet, or even just watching TV with Elizabeth at his side. But even that is an ordinary kotatsu-esque kind of slouching, nothing sensual about it.

It is so rare to see him in the early morning light, stretching out in a happy yawn with rumpled bedclothes and unruly hair, bare arms beside his head, reddish-golden sunlight on his face, his expression not just sated with the nights’ activities, but fully content with that fact. At peace. It is so rare, in fact, that when Sakamoto first sees it he does a doubletake and even wonders for a moment if Zura is putting on a show, trying to impersonate one of the others. But when Sakamoto glances at Gintoki, he can see him watching Zura with an expression not of surprise or annoyance but wistful fondness.

Takasugi’s gaze is more unreadable, but he joins Sakamoto in getting dressed and moving about with unusual quiet and caution, as if they’re trying to prolong this unusual sight as long as possible. It’s only when they leave the room to get something to eat that Zura blinks and shakes himself out of it, jumping to his feet and going to get washed. Gintoki groans and glares at the other two over breakfast. That image of a languid Zura will linger in Sakamoto’s head in years to come, and it is to a great delight when he finally gets to see it again, on a cold day in Edo, drinking hot chocolate together in the snow.

***

The gentleness of Takasugi

Takasugi is easily roused to anger when Gintoki is around, but he has a calmer side as well, for instance when planning for battle or directing his troops. He retreats, sometimes, into a solitary kind of quietude; strumming his shamisen, composing poems, reading reports, reading books, or just sitting and thinking.

He can be quiet, he can be careful, but you would usually not call him gentle. Even when they’re having sex, if he’s taking things slowly it comes across more like he’s teasing the other or others, rather than being considerate. As for times when somebody truly is sick or wounded and needs more careful handling. he acts short and grumpy about it. It is almost like he’s embarrassed, not just to be seen to show such care, but also embarrassed for the other person, too, and the weakness they’re showing.

But rarely, very rarely, on the eve of upcoming terrible battles, when the odds are against them and they all know that many will die, when life is thin and the four of them seek joy in each other’s bodies one more time; it’s only then, hovering so close to infinity that every small gesture between them is like poetry, that he can rest within tenderness without being bothered by it, without trying to hide it. When, in the gray light of the early dawn, his eyes as he looks on his brothers in arms are large and gentle and weary, the weight of impossible softness hanging on the small edge of his smile.

The others tuck those memories away and hide them deep in their heart. In years to come that moment will both warm and hurt.

Katsura will not see that look again; the trysts he and Takasugi sometimes keeps, before Benizakura, never even brush up at the edge of that kind of softness. Sakamoto will imagine he sees it, once, on Rakuyo, which might be a delusion. Gintoki truly will see it again, on a boat going down the river to Edo, Takasugi taking Gintoki’s head into his lap and smoke his pipe in quiet.

***

The ??? of Gintoki

1. Katsura thinks of Gintoki as a man of enormous strength and with a truly remarkable amount of different traits and qualities, some very open and blatant while others are a little more hidden. He might at first just seem like a lazy slacker, but he can summon a great deal of energy when he wants to, and not only for fighting either. If Katsura had to pick just one noun that doesn’t feel very Gintoki-like, he might pick ‘shyness’. Especially honest, quiet shyness that doesn’t hide behind a grumpy tsundere facade. The very first couple of times they kissed, unsure and clumsy, Katsura was able to see that unusual shy look on Gintoki’s face; it was still a treasured moment, a revelation in its own way. He saw it again the first time they slept together, the awkward, blushy fumbling as Gintoki took his own clothes and put his arms on Zura’s shoulder, neither of them having any clear idea what they were doing. It feels like a long time ago now.

It’s natural, Katsura thinks, that familiarity and comfortability would chase that momentary shyness away. Gintoki seems usually to be incredibly self-possessed, even in times when he’s weighed down by self-loathing. And usually he simply doesn’t talk about the things that would bare his inner self too awkwardly, nor does Katsura try to initiate anything romantic in public. But there are moments still, few and far between, when that old, odd timidity seems to return on Gintoki’s visage, and they seem as young again as they did back underneath a willow tree by a river, the taste of their first kiss lingering on their lips.

2. Takasugi would not deny that Gintoki is a man of many facets, but there is no question in his mind which trait he thinksfits him the least: ‘weakness’. The boy who kept defeating him in the dojo for such a long time, till Takasugi slowly began to catch up; the warrior who fought like a demon, seemingly invincible, with his unparalleled use of unpredictable movements and uncanny flow; even now, in his beaten-down peacetime persona, where his fighter skills are wasted on petty ordinary activities, it’s still the case that whenever he’s pushed to the brink, he will step up and summon forth his stupendous power and fighting skills that remain with him, indelible. His soul might be wounded now, deeply stricken and suffering; but his body can always fight.

Of course, Gintoki could be soft, towards those who were sick or wounded; or even sometimes when they fucked. But the sinuous, resting strength in those marvellous muscles always remained. He was no mean some perfect lover, but even if he got too over-enthusiastic at times with a tendency to blow his load (which Takasugi always scathingly pointed out, enjoying Gintoki’s scarlet flush and “Shut up! I’m doing the best I can!” in response); but that was always due to lack of technique, not a lack in strength. As for the battlefield, even when he’s bleeding from many wounds, with broken bones, there almost always seems to be still a residue in strength in him.

But there have been a couple of times when that was not the case. Gintoki caught a bad Amanto virus, once, during the war, and had to be isolated in his tent riding the sickness out. Katsura who never gets sick was the one who mostly took care of him, but Takasugi sneaked in there a couple of times. That pitiful figure, the feverish sweat, the trembling; the lack of resolve in Gintoki’s stricken face… It had shaken Takasugi, who went out to fight the enemy with even more fury than usual. He wasn’t even sure if it had been the sight itself that shook him the most, or the unwanted surge of tenderness that it had provoked in him. He had no idea what to do about that. Gintoki wasn’t supposed to be weak.

3. Sakamoto thinks that by and large, what he wished was a more common trait for Gintoki is just plain open joy. Not just battlefield frenzy, not just manic, not-quite-honest cheerfulness; not even just a mellow contentedness with a small, fond smile at those that he loves. That last thing is very nice and all, and so is raucous drunk companionship, even if those bar nights always feature copious puking, especially on Sakamoto’s part… But that’s beside the point. It would just be even better, in Tatsuma’s opinion, if Gintoki felt secure enough in his happiness, and in his own right to be happy, to express it more fully and openly. Even when sober.

He wonders sometimes if he should talk to Zura about that, or maybe Shinpachi and Kagura, or even someone like Gintoki’s landlady, who seems to have a good head on her shoulders. But as stubborn as Tatsuma Sakamoto can be, he can recognize this objective as a longterm one that will require a patient and subtle campaign. So he will just laugh even louder and turn up when least expected and coax Gintoki into sharing a few drinks with him at least.

And in the privacy of a hotel room, he is sometimes -- rarely -- rewarded by unexpected happy giggles from Gintoki as Tatsuma nibbles his ear. Those are very, very good moments.

[pwapuri]

Gintsu week day 7: meant to be

It was another dawn in Edo. The katoken program had already passed and they were showing the session of the films that nobody wants to see. Gintoki woke up in a jump dreaming again about some things from the past...When he bet with Takasugi that he could find the watermelon smelling the candy, he can still hear Zura's voice in his head saying it was a bad idea. Although younger Zura was always the most prudent and pleaded with Gintoki and Takasugi to stop getting in trouble without the sensei seeing them. That was when in the dream things got mixed up and Gintoki heard kagura taking Takasugi's place encouraging him to jump off the cliff while Shinpachi cut the watermelon and said the joke was over and the years had passed. An old man with responsibilities shouldn't do these things. It was true.

Upon seeing the friends of past and present, with the ghost of time on top of everyone gintoki woke up with kagura mumbling sleep and Shinpachi without the cover that fell off the sofa. The three had fallen asleep while the katoken program.

-Hey. Go to bed ... Do you all want to get a cold or...

He looked at the two young lying on the couch without concern. How long had it been like this?

At the age that Kagura now had, gintoki had lost Shouyo to the tendoushuu and at the age of Shinpachi he had already killed so many amantos and government officials that he had stopped worrying.

That was all he had now. It was more than he could ever imagine to have. When Otose found him and took him home, Gintoki went through the front door of what is now Yorozuya and thought that how big the space was, even that the space was just three times bigger than the prison cell. There was nothing, no furniture or equipment. He thought about how he would do business being who he was, without a title or master. But as soon as began to know the neighborhood and become friends with people and so they started to trust in his services, It wasn't long before he found these two idiots who started to follow him. That  room now looked tiny. Even though Shinpachi sometimes looked at him with contempt and even though he never managed to pay the month, making them be shamed. When they looked at him with admiration, when they asked for help or advice, everything was worth it. He never thought of it as a family because it is dangerous ... as companions it might be cowardly because he knew it was more. But he liked to think that this was another one of those feelings to which no name is given.

And out of all the people he met, almost all had the same title for him ... maybe not as strong as those two little pests who lived with him and whom he paid full attention to ...

All the idiots who gathered around him made him feel that way, indescribable.

As the day came he was thinking about his own life. Those kids weren't going to stay there forever ... nothing is eternal. But where the hell had space for a normal life? Staying here and there with a woman under his arm like the gorilla couple he knew? Or Zura and ikumatsu? No ... none of that seemed natural. Just imagining it made him shiver. The only situation in which he thought to walk around having a normal life was with Ketsuno Ana because he was going to show her off to the world ... after all, it was Ketsuno Ana. But of course it wouldn't be so good in reality after all, He didn't want to burn his wings getting too close to the sun ...and speaking of sun, what time was that?

Looking at the clock, he saw that there were six. He remembered tsukuyo's schedule by chance ... always by chance.

'Believe me, this is the time when I come home.'

After asking what time the hell she stopped working, that's what she answered. He marked her words because it was hard to believe that there were people who enjoyed working so much

He started thinking about things three years ago ... about the woman who had a destiny similar to him. She killed the master herself to protect someone else. What irritated him was perhaps because she was so different from him ... working and working instead of enjoying the life that the master gave her. After thinking so much he understands, her life and his are the same. The difference is that to forget, or rather, to remember that she is alive, she works.

The two were so similar and yet so different. Damn thought that bothered him. Why did it have to be this way? Why couldn't she make herself more of an idiot? Why it had to be so independent and beautiful? Beautiful ... a soul so pure and clean. Ah, that was a perfect attribute to keep him interested. But in the end it was impossible to keep something with that woman using just that ... he didn't worth it for her. He was weak and coward, afraid to lose those two lying on the couch, afraid of losing the friendship of others and was afraid of losing the life he won after losing everything two times. Starting over was tiring, new house, new goals, all of this is scary. It was already difficult to keep the feelings in place with those people around him. Imagine new sensations and the worst, new obligations.

But among those moments of fear, he wanted to throw everything up when he remembered that she liked him. She liked it enough to understand that he wasn't hers, who the hell gives up what loves to make someone else happy? What was her problem? Cowardice or courage? But after all, he didn't have the right to speak ...was he's fault to make that so clear , oh look! He thought, we are the same after all.

-maybe today she changes her mind and decides to say she loves me?

It would never happen. Otae and kyuubei were the first to say what he already knew. He was the one who must say he loved her or not. But he couldn't. First because he wasn't going to destroy her heart saying he didn't love her and secondly because he didn't like lying. It was not easy as with Sachan, that is a good woman (in many ways) but dosent work with him. Worse, she knew it and continued to insist.

Tsukuyo no, it was her and that damned hope... so he had to scream that she shouldn't have hope for a no future like him, but scream what she already knew?

Call to tell that you love her and can't live without the smell of lavender and cigarettes. That she's perfect for you in every detail. That she completes you.

Damn ... she knows. And yet she continues to look with those eyes. Eyes full of love and concern, even with a hard mouth to give cruel answers. Maybe he should call and say it. Call now!

Call and tell her to forget you, not to show up! That you can't love her and she needs to move on

What a mess...

What kind of feeling is that? As he thought again, it had no name, no shape. Where does he get these thoughts from?

Finally he picked up the phone and dialed. he thought of the bullshit he was doing on the first touch. Twisting the telephone cord sitting on the chair in the office, he began to murmur: 'Kestuno Ana I'm not cheating on you', 'believe me she's just a friend', 'this thing in my chest isn't what you thinking', 'I haven't seen her for months, I haven't spoken to her ... I'm the crooked savior of her home, I need to see how things are going', 'it doesn't mean betrayal, right?'

Four rings and no one answered. 'ah I knew ... she must have slept it, in fact it was what I should do too'

-Hello?

Everything went white. For a moment he forgot how to answer a phone. he heard the serious voice of the guardian of yoshiwara

-ham ... it's me. Is everything okay out there?

-gintoki is that you?

-Of course, did you think it was the joestar jotaro or something?

-Is this time to call? Have you looked at your watch? When was the last time you woke up so early in life?

What a regret.

-I thought something had happened, you ungrateful bitch

-What the hell would have happened that I couldn't have called the next day ?! You goddamned hollow head!

-My phone rang and I'm just checking, your stupid! -Said gintoki

All lies, the most poorly told. And she knew, again, she knew. She couldn't even hide the excitement of hearing after a night of patrol the voice of the man she loved most in the world.

-Well, it wasn't me... but I thank you for your concern. But there's nothing here that I can't handle. Unless a new yato king appears I don't need your services

-you are really stupid and boring! You will die unmarried! Damn time I called

-grumpy! Damn time I answered!

After a few seconds of silence gintoki was preparing to hang up when tsukuyo interrupted:

-but is everything really okay? Kagura and Shinpachi, are you all okay?

That was what destroyed him. She was like that, tough and sweet ... not much different from the others but something in her gentle way to say those things, how does she do that?

-yea. All right

-How about you? Is everything really okay?

Tsukuyo was never able to disguise it, she wanted to receive that call so much that it seemed like a dream. She was so happy to see that Gintoki remembered the time when she came home ... even though were it by chance. She thanked the universe and begged the man to continue the conversation

-Well, I had a weird dream ...

From that point on, the conversation lasted until the sun started to heat everything up again, until just before Shinpachi opened his eyes and saw the phone off the hook while gintoki slept on the desk. The desperation for the high bill made him yell at Gintoki and force him showering and getting ready, it was too late and they had promised to fix a roof at 11. Gintoki complained but was completely happy to have talked to tsukuyo. The two fell asleep hanging from the phone and it made them feel young again, as if for a moment everything was possible.

After all, that's what they were. The relationship between Gintoki and Tsukuyo might never leave the paper, there would never be room for a normal life ... but what was normal for them anyway? So it was enough. This enormous feeling of joy filled  and satisfied him. They never meant to be something because they were already everything for each other.

....

-Tsukuyo, Thank you for love me

-Thank you for letting me love you

__________

This was the most difficult prompt for me, I don't know why...I've tryed everything...edits, fanarts, comic. None of this managed to transmit my feels abou it. I'll make some fanart for the long prompt but, thats it!

[mariaantonnietta]

Let’s talk about the Gintama 2 Movie!! (Be Forever Yorozuya)

AI wanna talk timelines, timelines!!, I saw the movie again and with the manga finished I want to discuss theories about it!!

Hello! Is me again, I want to talk about the second movie, because after seeing it I always want to try to desipher what happened in the timelines we didn’t see play out! Of coure these will be at best theories that are we can’t probe, but I still want to try to guess! And now with the manga finished, I think is time to revisit it with all the date we have!

I will talk about the second movie, the manga end, and everything, so stay with me having that in mind!

Firstly, this movie deals with time travel (fairly well I might add, I realycould follow all the time twists and make sense of them), and I believed it wise to add a timeline so everyone follows along. Behold my horrible graphic!

Haha, there are some things to say about the drawing. From left to right, The first line is to separate the time-points nothing else, (the movie was released at june 2013, the manga volume for the shinigami arc was december 2013, so I don’t know if I am being  a bit generous there, but in timeline I think it only matters is before Shogun assasination (after which it get serious until the end), and that it is before that point)

The other are the first (and first’s branch),  second and thrid timeline, I didn’t count Tama going to the past to bring past Gintoki as a separate timeline and more like a  little branch of the first because when Gintoki is sent forwards they converge (you can also see it as the rest of that branch dissappearing). All of them are in a sense a branch from the first timeline, but this one converges so.

(ask if something else isn’t clear, I tried T-T) 

Well now unre the cut the  rest of my silly ideas and theories!

A comment, but the only thing that is a bit out of place is Tama surviving in the second timelime?, like shouldn’t her be erased like GIntoki?, I think is either that she would otherwise cause a bigger loop (she doesn’t exist as time machine there->Gintoki cant kill his past self->Genma makes her a time machine->Gintoki kills his past self-> she doesn’t exist as a time machine->...infiinitum) She is the one that allows the timeline to exist. The other is that she is in a Schrödinger' situation that as long as the possibility that she will exist in the future exist she will (gintoki dissappeared because his posibility of future was erased as he killled his past self). Or time machine power makes her inmune to paradoxes, who knows...

Also, we don’t talk enough of  Gintoki dying in this movie. Both Enmi Gintoki of the first timeline, the past Gintoki of the second, and the  protagonist Gintoki we follow in the movie (first timeline branch) are erased, and from now on we are following the Gintoki who’s the future of the Shiroyasha of the third timeline. (the one who helped us fight the Enmi, from now on he’s the protagonist)

The same about the kabukichou people, I mean, nothing changes practically, except maybe the Joui members having seen something strange that day.

1) Now, something I wondering was if the events of the first timeline ocurred in the same way that in the third one. Was there a Shogun Asasination arc?, A silver soul arc?

Well, no. I think that there events unfloded differently...because GIntoki dissapeared for five years, and he did it  before the shogun assasination arc (this not only for the date release, but also the jovial athmosphere at the start at the cinema)

But did the events of the story play on in another manner without Gintoki regardless?, Why, I sure they did. 

Okay, follow me on this. I do not know if the shogun assasination arc happened or not (even tough a parallel can be made of Katsura and Shinsengumi alliance in both places), but I think that even if it did, it didn’t happen at all as planned.

I think everything went into disarray with the virus (don’t we know about that), any plan was left into the air, and Nobunobu or Shigeshige are in charge depending on their luck.

I also want to know what happened with Utsuro and the Tendoshou in this timelime.(Because cm’on, don’t tell me I am the only one who believed Enmi GIntoki looked a lot like a crow ) I want to know if Takasugi is dead or not, and how he died/where he is. (I asumme Sakamoto is fine, maybe helping people, is Zura with those clothes and Gintoki words, Gintoki going to the terminal that make me worry)

So, I started gathering those points and I believe I reached a theory about this.

Okay, so follow me. These are the things we know about the first timeline.

Gintok soon after watching the movie discovered he was infected with the virus. He suspected it was the Enmi, went to talk of the past with Zura to clear his mind, talked wiith Gengai about making a time machine if he didn’t came back. 

Left the Yorozuya to investigate if there was a solution, tries to kil himself when he doesn’l  find one. He fails. He has not other choice but to wander as he sees the world be destroyed by his own hands. 

I posted this photo because of the ships that surround the tower and attack it. It doesn’t say when this attack took place after he left, we could only see that he wasn’t there. But this image looks fairly similar to the one when the Altana liberation force attacks.

The tower also looks very similar 5 years later as after attacked by the altana liberation army. (I checked also with how it was when the Tegenism ship fell, it looks more like the after the attack)

(After Initial liberation army attack. Third Timeline)

(Five years later. First timeline) Probably they didn’t have resources to rebuild with everything falling down with teh virus. Why would some army attack, I think that maybe the earthlings that escape, some had the virus, that probably expanded it onto another planets, that now made the problem worse in the universe and some people really mad at the planet from where the infection came from. Or, it could be rebels, like the Kihetai, that are taking advantage of the political turmoil to attack their actual objective (the terminal, with the minawabanwu maybe too ) Or both.

(Two years later third timeline) I added this to show how it doesn’t look like the terminal we discuss, so I think if something happened, it happened earlier more than later. (Or later, but it was only one incident and not 2)

Another thing we know is that the Enmi look a lot like the Tendoushu. I compared staffs and things. Wondered if there were related to Tengenism (the weir religion that launches the last arc)

Well, It’s not basic staff like tendoushou, but the decoration is different tha the tengeism. The clothes are also similar but not the same (I know the these arcs came later, but sorachi could have used different designs and not similar ones, you know, also, it’s just throwing ideas)

(Enmi at the start, checked, Enmi Gintoki uses the same one (and same clothes))

Oboro staff is different. Tengenism have the same type. Tengenism symbol are wings (phoenix), not Enmi. But the similarities are there too.

So, we all know the Enmi are nanomachines that are used to destroy worlds right?. I wondered if Utsuro could survive that. The answer  I reached was that it depended. If the Enmi virus only worked on humans, it would probably not kill it. ut if after killing humans it affected animals, then plants, then destryed the planet vitality, well, that would do it. It would depend of how lethat it actually was. (in  the last case, he would be the last to die, and Gintoki would be the only one who survives as the new vessel...moving onto the next world until he dies naturally or some poor bastard kills him)

 Well, I’m gonna asumme that the Enmi would destroy the world to that point, because they were described as ‘beings  that caused damage enough to leave a planet uninhabitable’ and the other ‘uninhabitable’ planet we see is Kouka’s, that is dying and its Altana was almost nothing when she left. Zura said they were forbidden or being restricted because of this.

So we know the Enmi were beings that could destroy worlds,(probably up to their lifeforce), that were contained by something, that someone attacked the terminal tower looking a lot like a pseude liberation army, and that Enmi’s dress is eerie similar (but not the same) to the Tendoushu.

I believe they were also a ting the Tendoushu kept to themselves, a fraction that can destroy a planet to the point of leaving without life (Altana) sounds like something they would regulate. Maybe mercenaries was  a cover up, or maybe it was both.

Was the first timeline all Utsuro plan? Well, too many jumps there. I believe thst he vouldn’t do that trapped with Shoyou, I think that in the first timeline he did as in the last arc, he saw that mortals used that virus to harm the others, and decided to make use of that. He of course was the cause that they attacked the Terminal and is probably happy that all the universe may perish of disease.

Maybe.

Or maybe that was the plan, and Takasugi stopped him. (There are too many factors to see how things developed. But either kihetai + harusame maybe + minawabanshu and some others killed utsuro, or they died either fighting him or from disease)

The way GIn is dtanding aside as the ships atack the terminal (he can’t join) makes me think some kind of final battle took place.

(Gorilla might not know how Gintama was fgonna end, but he did have some ideas, and final fight at the Terminal tower was one that stuck all the series)

Does Gintoki know of Utsuro?, Who knows?  If you want my take, I think Takasugi and Utsuro both died figthing each other. As the terminal exploded.

I think he eventually at least, found out. Because he decided to go die there.

(also because you know, final fight at the terminal.)

2) In the second timeline everything is much more clear. Young GIntoki dies. I see 3 options unfolding

a) the one I call the normal one. GIntoki dies, people mourn him (because Gintoki just erased his future, not his past, young Gintoki body should remain), either Zura or Takasugi kills Shouyou (probably Takasugi, I’m thinkin so because Oboro mostly, he would pick if not shiroyasha, the other more known at the frontlines one, but could be either way), and is a bit diffrent but in practical mostly the same.(maybe some things are held back and the shogun asssination hasn’t happened yet, or maybe it did, who knows) We can’t tell more than thi.

b) Probably not route. shouyou discovers that Gintoki’s died and it gives him strenght to make keep Utsuru more in check, he uh...destroys things, there’s no need to kill him for now.things advance more or less like in canon,  with a lot of things we don’t see 

c) I cry route. Shouyou discovers what happened, and it kills off his personality (sends him to sleep at least). There’s no need for either Zura or Takasugi to kill him. They never find his master at the war (maybe they are told he is dead, and don’t believe it). They didin’t kill his master, but los Gintoki to who knows who, and don¡’t know what happened to master, Thingd happen more or less like in canon.

 3) Here someone (probabky kurokono!...ok no, leave me dream), wakes GIntoki from his drunk sleep and he and the joui 4 see a bizarre image of people from 15 years in the future attack the Enmi.(of course they don’t know this) They brieftly join them. They see from a distance how the future people dissapear. They continue with their life.

(That last one is canon, haha)

As you can see nothing has been cleared and these are mostly cool theories, a lot of other things are possible. But I don’t know, wanted to talk about it.

[imagine-gintama]

Ahhh!! I’m so excited,can I request a male reader nsfw with gintoki,takasugi, shimura and hijikata? 😭💕

Male reader NSFW hc’s with Gintoki, Takasugi, Saitou, and Hijikata.

Sakata Gintoki:

Gintoki loves oral, giving and receiving. When giving, the control he feels when you squirm or quiver and attempt to close your legs, only for him to push them apart, is unexplainable.

When receiving, it goes without saying, your mouth provides a different stimulation compared to penetration that has him craving for more. Plus, you make such cute faces too.

Gintoki doesn’t take being on the top or the bottom too seriously. He’s pretty experimental, willing to be both. If both of you feel good from it, he likes it. That being said, he does prefer being the dom slightly more.

Loves, loves, loves to make you beg, edging constantly, with his hands or mouth on your dick. Only one problem, Gintoki breaks and gives in easily if you begs. He’s weak to that, but pretends that S/O doesn’t know that.

Gintoki is a huge ass man, especially when it comes to your ass. Groping, smacking, anything really to touch that ass, Gintoki does it.

Takasugi Shinsuke

Careful, Takasugi is a biter.

That being said, Takasugi likes to use his mouth in general. Whether it is to place light butterfly kisses or to mark, he likes doing it all. Except when it comes to oral, he enjoys receiving more than giving.

Light bondage is this man’s bread and butter. Ropes, silk, binds, and handcuffs all float his boat. The sight of you stuggling in his binds, unable to touch him is hot.

Has more tendencies to be the dominant one, but if he’s feeling it, he doesn’t mind being the bottom. Since he’s slightly shorter, so if you’re taller, having your pleasure clouded eyes peer down at him as he pleasures you sends him on a power trip. If you’re not taller than him, don’t worry, that fact alone sends him on a power trip.

Takasugi is pretty quiet when he doms, hums of approval and sighs are more frequent than moans and groans. However, when he bottoms, he’s much louder.

Takasugi thinks the noises he makes are  embarrassing, so he bites his lips or you often to hold back. When you’re is finished with him, its either your own body that is littered in bite marks or his own lips that are swollen, possibly bleeding, depending on how much you “messed” with him.

Saitou Shimaru

Inexperienced especially when it comes to guys, but willing to learn for your sake. Please help this poor man.

Praise and encouragement go a long way for Saitou. He understands that he probably isn’t the best at pleasuring, so if you praises him for his effort, he melts.

He’s quite self-conscious about the noises he makes, so he tries to hold them bock quite often. However, continuous reassurance from you makes him feel more comfortable. He’s thankful for your patience with him.

Saitou relishes being close to you, his favorite positions are when he can see your face, when he can have his back pressed against your chest, or vice versa. However, that doesn’t mean he isn’t willing to experiment. He just wants to be in your embrace.

He wouldn’t have a position he prefers, but would prefer if you took the lead during the first few times. To guide him through the waters, if you will. When he becomes more comfortable, he will try other things out.

Feels guilty if he falls asleep, even though it happens less frequently than he’d expect.

Hijikata Toshirou

Hijikata is a huge switch, a strong believer that it’s the best of both worlds. He’s here for a good time, and both are great to him. He’s open trying a variety of new things, but he’s not open to hurting you, much.

Please. Toy. With. His. Hair. He likes it when you run your hands through his hair, tugging when he does something to your liking. He likes it when you have your hand tangled in his hair. He also likes when you tug his hair to get him to face a certain direction, but he’d never tell you that.

He gets flustered easily, especially when you whisper sweet nothings into his ears. Hijikata will almost immediately turn his head to the side. 10/10 will call you an idiot, lovingly.

Hijikata wants to try tying you up, but he’s unsure as he also likes the warmth of you hands on his skin while he’s toying with your body. He also thinks its a little lonely in a sense if you can’t touch him.

Hijikata’s nipples are quite sensitive. He cannot hold back when your fingers or tongue is on them. The sounds of ecstasy that come from his lips when you do that are delicious.

[lilac-5ky]

I have a theory that Takasugi is actually bashful/shy/awkward.

Okay it's not exactly a theory but hear me out.

Exhibit A: In official fanart as well as that episode in which he beat Gin when they were younger, Takasugi blushed and acted all embarrassed and shy when others praised him. Meaning that he can't really handle compliments or praise, even when it's deserved.

Exhibit B: The episode with the red light district visit. According to Tatsuma, nothing happened with that girl. He just glared at her all night long or something, and even if it did happen, she didn't sound too happy meaning that he kept that attitude up. No, I don't think that Takasugi hates women, because he did choose her. Be it her appearance or the fact that others were with, he did show some interest for her, enough to get mad when Gin also pointed at her.

So, why did he glare at her? Why did he "ignore" her? A prostitute will be promiscuous and try to get her client all drunk and sleep with her, extort as much money as possible. Takasugi is more of a "mental" kinda guy, meaning he values personality more than looks even if he does have a preference. So when she presumably tried to move things along when they were strangers, he probably got cold feet.

Even if she was willing and he found her pretty enough to spend the night with her, he ended up hesitating. His glaring isn't part of his "edgelord persona" as some would say, but is just evidence of him being shy! He is not like Sakamoto or Gin who are upfront and openly sexual, he is more reserved about the way he feels. So most likely he felt awkward about sleeping with some stranger, especially when she insisted. Him glaring is a way to conceal his shyness.

Exhibit C: While his closest friends call him Takasugi, most of the Kiheitai members call him Shinsuke. Even Matako calls her SHINSUKE-sama, not Takasugi-sama, which means that he insists on others calling him that. He doesn't mind his closest friends (joui 4) calling him Takasugi because they already are close, and by asserting his first name as the way for others to call him is as if he is trying to close the gap between them.

Now going back to Exhibit A, he felt awkward about people praising and admiring him. He doesn't want the Kiheitai's admiration, and while he does view a lot of them as disposable soldiers (sad truth of war), he wants to be on par with them as comrades. If everyone uses one another's first name, then no gap is created, aka no opportunities for people to fawn over him and bring him on the spot.

Namely, I've seen a lot of people confuse Takasugi's lack of romantic interest as him being homosexual or something, but if you look at his previous interactions with people in general, he does seem a bit more awkward than he lets on. Even when talking about his own friends, he tries to conceal his feelings and acts a bit harsher (e.g. his dialogue with Nizou in Benizakura).

Therefore, at the end of the day Takasugi can't help but be a...

tsundere. Here, I said it. Takasugi is actually a tsundere and that was the whole point of the post. He prefers opening up to only a handful of people, plays it off when accused of having friends/comrades, admits to it in crucial moments, blushes/glares when pressed and has a tendency of "insulting" those whom he considers his closest friends (cough cough Gintoki cough cough).

In another life where he'd be able to have the time and the emotional capacity to meet girls, I feel like he'd totally be the guy to get all bashful and semi aggressive because of having a hard time to declare his feelings.

[goldenlaquer]

Could I request some general headcanons for the Kiheitai (including Nizou), like how do they get along with each other, how they spend their free time etc. Unfortunately Gintama didn't show us a lot of Kiheitai interactions. Wishing you all the best for your blog!

 I gotchu, anon. The Kiheitai faction has got to be one of the more underrated aspects of Gintama for sure. Thanks so much for your words!

Kiheitai Headcanons:

Kijima Matako:

If you got something to say to her face, make it sweet and short, or you’ll be staring down the business ends of her revolvers. Unless you are Takasugi Shinsuke, of course. But doubly so if your name is Takechi Henpeita.

With a quick temper and happy trigger fingers, Manko Matako should be on anyone’s list of whom not the cross, but within the Kiheitai, this means plenty of entertainment between missions and during space travel. As a result, often poked and prodded. 

She’s mostly chill with Bansai, but he sometimes (unintentionally) pisses her off when he (unintentionally) insults her. 

Do not listen to that twin-bunned ape. She definitely takes care of her body and especially her underwear, because you never know when Shinsuke-sama might succumb to his urges and-! 

is weak to cute things. Weak. Oh, and sweet things as well. She tries to keep it a secret. She doesn’t want to be viewed as childish. Safe to say, everyone in the Kiheitai knows anyways. 

Her free time is spent trying to find Shinsuke-sama, indulge in her mentioned vices, and kill Henpeita. 

Takechi Henpeita:

For the last time, “I am not a lolicon, I am a feminist.”

The one guy everyone loves to hate. 

If you think he only cosplays Takasugi then you are wrong. Matako, Bansai, Nizou. He even cosplays the Yorozuya trio (he loves cosplaying Kagura ofc) 

This hobby unfortunately is the main cause for all the beatings he takes, courtesy of Matako and Bansai. 

Speaking of beatings, he takes straight-up insults like a champ. Literally anything you say does not seem to faze him.

If Henpeita doesn’t want to be found, Henpeita won’t be found. Poof. But pissing Matako is so fun so you might find him by her at most times. The sibling dynamic is strong with them.

The thing is, when the going gets tough, the Kiheitai knows he’s got their back with his quick-thinking and skilled strategy. Despite all his creep tendencies and annoying habits, they can trust him with their lives. 

As for free time… well, whatever you think this man does in his free time might definitely be true. But BUT, despite what others may think, he actually does do serious things, like planning strategies, missions, emergencies and… err… other serious stuff. 

Kawakami Bansai:

this dude is just so naturally funny. Like, it doesn’t work if he’s trying, because the jokes are so terrible and dumb. 

I swear Bansai is intelligent, but he is the mastermind at interpreting things the wrong way, like he doesn’t understand the nuances of certain social situations.  

“Want to go out with me?” “Sure, where do you want to go?”

His shamisen playing is on point. But that fact and him being a night-owl causes a lot of complaints. No one wants to hear it at three in the morning.

Bansai looks out for Matako in and out of the battlefield, regardless of whether Takausugi orders it or not. He actually does like Henpeita, finds him funny and respects his prowess, but also likes mauling him with his shamisen lol

Does not get enough respect for his side job. Excuse me, being a producer for top-tier idols is his main. Being a Kiheitai assassin is just his side job.

really, not many in the Kiheitai care about his musical aptitude, except Shinsuke and Henpeita, who likes to discuss Enka. 

Nothing really special about his free time. He uses it for finishing the latest Otsuu single or finding a nice remote spot to just chill with his headphones. 

Okada Nizou:

He maintains a distance from the other members. Small talk here and there, nothing personal. Maybe some disparaging remarks too

Just business, y’all. Just business. 

Obscene amount of gel is needed to maintain than signature grey locks. In fact, he has a whole regimen. 

Might or might not think of himself as a silver fox. 

He’s prideful. God bless the new recruit who thinks he can make fun of the poor old blind man. He’ll prove you so wrong, you wouldn’t even know what happened until your head hits the floor and you’re staring up at Nizou.

“Not so bad for an old, blind man, eh?”

Remember when Nizou almost kills Matako? Yeah, they’re not on good terms.

Henpeita is probably the only one cheeky enough to playfully mess with Nizou and get way with it.

His free time: honing his blade and touching up his hair.

Takasugi Shinsuke:

Again, It’s business. He maintains the superior-subordinate relationship to a T. He doesn’t disclose personal thoughts/feelings or even small talk to the others. They don’t really mind. They all deeply respect him. 

Takasugi is always moving forwards. He doesn’t like lingering anywhere for too long. Doesn’t like growing attachments and sentiments. This means its kind of rare for him to meet up with the all the members when they aren’t on the run or travelling through space. 

Have a problem with him? He doesn’t care. Do your job right, or he’ll have a problem with you. 

That is, he’s more lenient to people who are competent and important to his goals.

Rare as it may be, there are times when he indulges his time with the members. Drinking and eating alongside them after an important mission goes particularly well and he’s in the right mood to be socializing with the others. 

He sometimes stays and listens to Bansai’s playing, even picking up an instrument and dueting with him. Shinsuke can appreciate fine music. 

Dry humor dude. You might see a hint of smirk if someone tells a very good joke. But even that disappears before anyone can process it. 

He ignores Matako’s fangirl-ing. It’s surprising that he’s so patient with her. He also tolerates Henpeito’s cosplay. It can be convenient when he wants to make a quick escape. 

Free time: doesn’t have any. Every moment is spent planning, planning, and planning.

All in all, the Kiheitai are a rough crowd, brought together by the one and only Takasugi Shinsuke, but I love them anyways.