#A) snark is an art and most of you are not artists

[fideidefenswhore]

latest promotional article for the tmatl production referring to anne stanhope/seymour as 'violent'...booooooo

[vanishedinvain]

𝐓𝐇𝐈𝐒'𝐋𝐋 𝐁𝐄 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐃𝐀𝐘 𝐓𝐇𝐀𝐓 𝐈 𝐃𝐈𝐄

—𝐩𝐫𝐨𝐥𝐨𝐠𝐮𝐞: 𝐩𝐞𝐫𝐟𝐞𝐜𝐭 𝐚𝐥𝐥-𝐚𝐦𝐞𝐫𝐢𝐜𝐚𝐧 𝐛𝐢𝐭𝐜𝐡

pairing: benedict bridgerton x fem!reader (but she doesn't show up yet, sorry lol)

summary: benedict's last moment of contentment before the storm that marooned his dreams.

warnings: very very brief mention of a gun, baby's first fic (it's me, i'm baby)

wc: 1.6k

next chapter // series masterlist

The Wiminet Art House sits just outside the limits of Mayfair, owned by the Dowager Baroness Lyra Wiminet. It is only half the size of a wing at Somerset House, and most of the artists are either anonymous or so unknown, they are as good as anonymous. It crams in an overwhelming number of pieces, barely a centimeter between each frame. It features a myriad of styles: soft landscapes, portraits, absurd finger-paintings, violent war scenes. 

When it first opened, every London newspaper dismissed it as the eccentricity of a widow, mad without a man to guide her. There was no cohesion, they said. Downright tasteless. Where was the class? The refinement? It was a laughingstock for all of two days before the ton moved on as they always did.

It was also Benedict Bridgerton’s most frequented gallery. And Eloise had no idea why.

“You have been here at least twenty times in the past year, and they have only changed a single painting,” Eloise pointed out on one of these trips. Though she did not prefer to visit the same blasted gallery with the same blasted paintings, it was more merciful than watching Daphne and their mother flit about the house searching for the perfect dress to secure a proposal from the Prussian prince.

Plus her brother promised to buy her an apricot ice afterwards.

“What could possibly be left to see?” she asked.

They were standing in front of a rather large seascape, one that spanned a quarter of the wall. Benedict turned away to look at Eloise, a grimace upon her face as she tried to see what her brother saw. It was a quality Benedict most appreciated in her; she was stubborn and quick to snark, but she never wrote off his interests as frivolous. She was attempting to understand, even if she was staring at the painting like it personally offended her.  

“Do you remember when you were eleven and Colin brought home that mystery novel for all of us? The one where an opera singer was killed in the middle of a show.”

“An Aria Most Deadly,” she recalled, smiling, “I couldn’t put it down. Col was scolded for bringing home such a—how did Mama word it?—terribly gruesome and improper book.”

He chuckled, remembering their mother’s scandalized face. As Colin was being scolded, she had set the book down on the settee. Eloise, ever nimble, snatched it and ran up to her room with nary a scuff across the floor.

“You re-read it over and over, looking for the clues, even after you’d finished it days prior. A snide comment from the stagehand that was once humorous turned dark. The author’s insistence on describing the location of the candelabra suddenly became obvious.”

“The details were so much clearer in hindsight,” she remarked.

“That is usually the privilege of hindsight.” He gestured back to the painting in front of them. “What do you see?”

She stared for a moment, tilting her head to one side to see if a change in angle would help. It was a turbulent scene, violent even, with outbursts of red and orange screaming amongst the cerulean and imposing slate clouds as the ship went down.

“A shipwreck?” Eloise answered with a shrug. “An unfortunately timed storm?”

Benedict stepped back, and grabbed Eloise by the shoulders, shifting her to the right so that she could stand in his place. “Do you see that spot of red on the ship?”

She squinted slightly. “Clearly, a fire broke out on the ship. Likely from the gunpowder catching on the wood. I mean, it says it in the title, Ship on Fire in Water,” she said, reading off the plaque underneath.

“But look closer at this spot of red at the front of the ship. Or that one by the captain’s quarters. Compare it to how the artist paints the flames,” Benedict insisted, gesturing to each area of interest. “He or she blends out the flames with orange and a bit of yellow usually. But these particular spots aren’t. They’re blended with brown. Maybe even a bit of black. That’s not fire, is it?”

Her eyebrows raised as the realization dawned on her. “It’s blood! Someone was killed. The captain, maybe?” She turned back to look at him in unbridled excitement at the newly-uncovered narrative.

Benedict smiled widely, crinkles forming around his eyes, watching his little sister finally get it, get him. “Possibly.”

“What do you think was the motive? Was it a mutiny?”

He shrugged. “That I am unsure of, dear sister. Every time I come back, I see something new. So, perhaps we need to look at it longer. Or make our rounds and come back with fresh eyes.”

Eloise had bounded off before he even finished.

They spent another two hours in the gallery, making little comments on each one, attempting to decipher a story from it. They even requested a step-ladder for the ones that had been skied because Benedict, having met Lady Wiminet, knew that there was no rhyme or reason as to the placement of each painting.

There was a most brilliant park scene about half a meter down from the ceiling. The artist did not draw a realistic, soft sunset, but a heightened one with punchy plums and a bright tangerine shade to blend. It was a bold choice that Benedict would’ve never thought of. The scene itself was of a promenade, much to Eloise’s displeasure, but she found amusement in mapping out the interpersonal relationships of the swans in the lake.

They made their way back to the bloodied, fiery ship shipwreck, standing in amicable silence before Eloise spoke.

“I understand it now. Why you've been here twenty times. Why you sketch until your fingers shake at dinner, but then use your drawings as fire kindle at night. You’re chasing greatness.”

“I want to get one of mine on these walls one day, El,” he said quietly, as if they weren’t the only people in the room. It was the first time he had admitted that ambition out loud.

“You will,” she replied, equally quiet back.

He sighed in relief. He wasn’t worried about Eloise’s reaction, though her vote of confidence was cherished. He was worried about being so unworthy that the words would refuse to roll off his tongue, lodging in his throat as a croak. But the idea was out there now, and a mirthful giddiness sprouted forth in the soil where his insecurities were rooted.

“I’d be anonymous, though,” he added after a pause.

She frowned, but neither of them made further comments on the subject. He already understood what she didn't verbalize. She dreaded living and dying in anonymity without a university degree or prolific novel attached to her name, something to outlast her that wasn’t a dullard husband or terrifying child. She could not stand the thought that the world might feel zero impact from her existence. 

Benedict, however, was far less eager to sign his name on a canvas. He could be displayed in any gallery in England if he simply asked, regardless of whether he was even good enough. Who would dare criticize a Bridgerton painting, with nine generations of viscounts breathing down their necks? If he were to ever put his name on any of his work, he wanted—needed—to be so good that everyone would be too awestruck by what was in front of them to check whose name was etched onto the little copper plaque beneath the frame.

This was one of the only points of incongruence between the second eldest Bridgerton brother and sister that couldn’t be remedied by a simple anecdote or shift to the right. Though, perhaps there was no need for one; a painter would never ask a writer to adjust her palette and a writer would never tell a painter his meter was off-tempo.

It was an afternoon well spent away from the ornery obligations of the social season, coming home with their appetites spoiled from the promised apricot ices. Benedict grabbed An Aria Most Deadly from the library, and read the first few chapters before retiring for the night. He’d finished the novel after he pried it away from Eloise years ago, so he knew it was the conductor who had killed the opera singer. This knowledge only pulled the deftly placed clues into crisp focus upon this second reading; even the first chapter was littered with hints.

Perhaps that is why when he sits in the viscount’s study, the one that was never supposed to go to him, he often thinks about the night of Granville’s party. That night began with him feeling so alive, more alive than he could ever fathom. Yet, it ended with a sinking stone of dread taking up a months-long residence in the pit of his stomach.

Were there clues he should’ve seen?

If he’d been less drunk off the wine or the women or both, he’d have noticed Daphne wasn’t wearing the necklace gifted to her by the prince, even though he clocked the ostentatious clunk of jewelry when she left for the Trowbridge Ball. Or that the hem of her dress was muddy and her face was pinched, on the verge of tears.

If he wasn’t so preoccupied with how to take advantage of his freedoms as the spare of the family, he’d have noticed the blooming violet bruises on Anthony’s knuckles as he yanked Benedict into the study with considerable force.

It wasn’t until he was rolling his shoulder, about to complain that his arm could've been popped out of its socket, when the gun box was placed on the desk with a resounding thud. 

Things only clicked into place as Anthony began frantically talking about estates and dowries and an appointment with the duke at dawn, but there were signs from the moment he walked in the door.

The details were always so much clearer in hindsight.

next chapter // series masterlist

a/n: they dropped new abc pictures last month, and i decided to make it everyone else's problem by starting this fic. now it’s bridgerton eve!!! rejoice!!!

[despairots]

miles 42 and miles 1610 are twins and fight over reader and try to impress her and stuff

━━━━━━━━ talk about first impressions.

earth1610! miles morales x gn! reader x earth42! miles morales. fluff and warning, there’s some suggestive comments from grown adults. i started this yesterday but im posting once/twice a day until i burn myself out from writing and deleting requests. reader is like peni parker. ignore the description, my brain was idk.

please remember that in my last oneshot, earth 1610 miles will be spiderman and earth 42 miles will be the prowler, the two are vigilantes, keep that in mind. also you’re an anarchist lolsies!!1!1! the spanish translation might not be accurate. leaving this on a cliffhanger too LMFAO. you’re always an anarchist in these oneshots.

where the morales twins can’t help but fall for the technology nerd who can do a lot of things, trying to impress you and gift you stuff in public, and with you, obviously being a talented person, you apparently have a lot of admirers, especially weird, old, strange adults.

you sighed in embarrassment at the two morales twins trying one up eachother with giving gifts to you or impressing you. some people would call you lucky, some would be jealous of you.

being fought over the two most attractive guys in brooklyn vision who may look the same but act like polar opposites is a nightmare.

the two may be extremely smart and artistic but they for sure, had different personalities.

miles morales is smart and passionate, committed to others before himself. he has a lot of love for science and art, which he got from his mother, making inventions since he was younger.

the two are both suckers for music, mixing beats as a hobby with their uncle aaron when they were younger.

miles is sociable around crowds, as even when he struggled to fit in after moving to brooklyn vision, would often start conversations with those he came across on the street.

though many of his acts are selfless, mikes is partly driven by low self-confidence in his own abilities, feeling smaller than he is.

since becoming spiderman, miles is extremely eager to help others. this is as much to his credit as it is to his detriment, as he will often put himself in grave, life-threatening danger, in his quest to protect his friends and those he cares about.

myles morales, on the other hand, may also be smart but he’s closed off only being carefree with you and his twin brother. he also has a lot of love for art, spray painting with his brother.

myles isn’t one to talk, again, he’s closed off and usually upholds a stoic persona, opposed to his brother who doesn’t have a problem showing how passionate and cheerful he is.

with him being the prowler, and technically being labeled as ‘spidermans rival’, ignoring that the prowler is his own being. he had a strong morality of protecting his family and you after his father had died.

to which leads him also going into life-threatening dangers.

“[name], do you have any idea how lucky you? like, i would die to be in your spot!” you rolled your eyes at that sentence, “then do it.” your snark reply made a few people in the hallway snicker.

now back to you, [name] [lastname], the robot-technology-hacking loving nerd that grew with the morales twins and them fighting over you, it’s not something that’s lucky.

that constantly one-upped eachother to gain your attention, to the point they wouldn’t HESITATE to embarrass eachother in front of you along with literally fighting who got the best present for you.

it didn’t help since you liked both of them, i mean, how couldn’t you not like them? they were literally labeled ‘most attractive boys alive’ and their personality didn’t help, why do you think you fell deeply in love?

“i got the best gift-“

“i did!”

your bestfriend, gwen stacy, sneaked her arm around you, “i obviously did.” she gave you a smug looked as you sighed in your hands with embarrassment, remembering the time you two accidentally kissed (more like pecked eachother on the lip).

you two vowed to never talk about that again but since that was two years ago, you guys are all 15 by the way, which you guys were 13 by the time she stole your first kiss.

the morales twins didn’t like that, uhh, next!

“ahora no es el momento, gwen.” you muttered, expressing massive stress from the two and the welcomed gwen, “i — uh, failed spanish.” you made a ‘that’s-the-point-‘ look.

“siempre suenas bien hablando en español.” myles commented, shooing gwen’s arm off your shoulder and throwing his arm over yours instead.

“get apagado de [nombre], myles.” miles rolled his eyes and scoffed at his twin, “at least i get an a+ in spanish.” miles gasped at the comment with offence.

“this is why you’re failing science, estúpido!”

“estoy siendo peleado por gemelos estúpidos.” you pinched the bridge of your nose before sneaking out between the twins quarrel, heading over to foam party.

did i mention that you won awards and was on the news for making a working robot suit and finding out how to time travel?

mutters and comments were heard in the coffee shop, irritating your already bad headache. ‘i hate society.’ you rubbed your temples, before ordering your drink and waited.

apparently those minutes of waiting, you got… weird, suggestive comments from grown adults. your face scrunched up every time they said something about you.

“that shirt really compliments your curves.”

you’re were just 15.

“you’ll find a person just like me.”

they were in their late 30s.

“how ‘bout instead of wasting your pretty little time in this coffee shop, you come to my place.”

you just wanted your coffee.

“can i get your number?”

stop.

“you’re really sexy.”

stop it.

they tried grabbing your hand.

“i’ll treat you better.”

stop it. they tried kissing your hand before someone clocked them in the face, “aren’t you an adult, man?” miles’ voice was heard beside your ear as he tried comforting you.

myles rubbed his knuckles with a grossed look on his face. they saw that they were harassing you as you tried to move away from them, worst thing yet, nobody tried to do anything.

they saw what was happening but didn’t help, god they really hated adults.

“acércate a ellos, y será mucho peor que un puñetazo en la cara.” they ran off, myles grabbed your order as the three of you left. it was quiet, too quiet for your looking.

“i could’ve handled that y’know—“ miles handed you a box, opening it to which showed a necklace with a charm that was your hacker logo. you could feel the myles’ eye twitched.

“remember i got [name] a car—“

“shut the hell up, man!”

[name] after the morales twins keep giving them money and gifts.

[randomfoggytiger]

React: A Late-Canon Reviler Gives the Revival a Try (Home Again), Part IV

This is the one Revival episode I was semi-curious about: it may drum up a lot of heartfelt ~emotions~, but my glasses-on-emotions-off side is dying to be intrigued or surprised or… placated. 

It’s gotta happen at some point during this series. 

Part I (My Struggle I), Part II (Founder's Mutation), and Part III (Weremonster).

Let's go!

HOME AGAIN

It’s Home Again tiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiime~. 

Oh, no. 

(Note from the future: Looking back, this sign makes me want to rage.)

…Why are the firemen antagonistically hosing down the homeless?

“You people?” In D.C.? In 2015? Sure, Jan. 

This man’s career woulda been over in five seconds. 

The firemen’s careers woulda been over in five seconds. 

The police wouldn’t be standing by eating food on the job while supervising, what? 

Does. 

Do the writers remember how police procedurals work?

Do….

Do the writers not care about the casefiles anymore? Well, yes; but… do they not care… at all?

Guys, if I read this in a fanfic I’d have already skipped to the end, skimmed through the last paragraph, and closed the tab. 

Solomon Grundy or the avenging Angel of Death or the Homeless Havoc Haver got off a dumpster… truck… and. 

I’m not taking any of this seriously. 

If the MSR is really good, I’m going to save all my snark for the plot. 

It’s a stinky one already. 

THE POLITICIAN GUY STARTS SCREAMING, THE BAD GUY STOMPS IN, RIPS HIS ARMS OFF, AND THAT KILLS THE POLITICIAN GUY?? RIPPING HIS ARMS OFF???? REALLY???

And no, he didn’t rip him in half-- he ripped his arms off.

All the homeless people zipped up their tents knowing the dead garbage... thing was coming-- so, do they have protection from it, or are they afraid of it? 

Also, why did that soda can crunch up before the garbage truck even arrived? A visual that the Garbage Gargantuan was coming? …Before he actually, physically arrived? Even though he apparently can’t manipulate matter in that way himself? Or hasn’t shown himself to do so, yet?

It’s all kinda… shoddy. 

“Sir, are you there?” said the most unconcerned voice on the other end of his discarded phone. …You couldn’t give me… something? 

Wait, the garbage truck dropped him off, drove off, then had to drive back, I guess, to pick him up mere minutes later. Less than five. Less than three, even. 

That makes no sense. 

Here they cooooooooooooooooooooome….

Oh, that’s where these outfits came from. This episode. 

Scully still has her middle-aged wine mom low-cut, very unprofessional-- and your girl knew how to be hot and professional back in the day. (I’m not even saying she has to be prudish, I’m saying why that shirt? Leaving it unbuttoned would work for a softer blouse, but hers has stiffer fabric, which makes the shirt bunch weirdly. You can see it particularly in the uneven collar and wrinkled lapels:) 

Wait, what’s that weird, discolored stripe on Mulder’s left chest? It’s not a shadow from the tie, I don’t think. Is it a wet patch? A thinning patch of fabric?

Also, yes, this episode is a rip-off of Arcadia, who cares. 

“Well, it looks like this person was born with no footprints. …Which is impossible, by the way.” Yes, Mulder, the team knows, THEY ASKED YOU ON THIS CASE. Siiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiigh. 

It wouldn’t be so bad if the cuts didn’t hold too long or end awkwardly. Whoever was in the editing room really hampered the already questionable quality of their material. 

Scully’s voice isn’t as “smoker” anymore. 

WAIT, WAIT, HOLD UP. NONONONONONONONONO.

Mulder just looks out a window and sees a MURAL of the KILLER??????????

WHAT, DID THE HOMELESS POOL THEIR POCKET CHANGE, BUY PROFESSIONAL GRADE ART SUPPLIES, AND PUT GARBAGE GARY UP ON A BILLBOARD?????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????

MULDER AND HIS HOMELESS ART, TAKE TWO, I GUESS. 

Maybe it was a local artist who heard the homeless stories and put it up, but.... 

Wait. 

Waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaait, wait, wait, wait, wait. 

Scully has Bill’s name. In her phone. As William. 

As. 

William. 

AS. 

WILLIAM. 

That was purely to tease the fans because there’s no way Bill goes by William. 

Scully doesn’t even call Bill ‘William.’

Wait. 

Those aren’t Scully’s nails. 

Did the hand model casting department even try. 

I WAS RIGHT, oh, look, it changed due to Scully’s ~trauma~, I guess. 

The writers and cinematographers and directors didn’t even try. 

Why would Scully have Bill in her phone as ‘William Scully, Jr.’ and not Bill? He’s Bill to her, not ‘William Scully, Jr.’ the 2nd, ™. 

She didn't: it was a ~ trauma mirage~.

And a badly done one at that.

The writers tried to have a little “oh, look, it’s William!” moment, but the caller layouts are completely different. 'William' is front-and-center whereas the 'William' in 'William Scully Jr.' is shoved off to the left.

They should have done an extreme zoom-in on the ‘William’ part of ‘William Scully, Jr.’, then a snap over to Scully, then a snap back showing Bill's full name. It would get the point across without being nefariously baity. 

(Note from the future: This makes even less sense in retrospect.)

Shoddy scene splicing, what’s new?

Bill was in Germany, huh. Guess he’s still in the military. 

WAIT. 

Maggie, who is in Maryland, next to D.C., had BILL listed as her emergency contact. (Note from the future: Not even that, it's worse.)

Who was supposed to be in Germany. 

Instead of her daughter who is in D.C.

~~~~~~Tensions~~~~~~ I see. 

Mulder immediately notices the slight change in Scully's voice and intuits Something’s Wrong. Good, good. The bare minimum, but good. 

Wait, the EMTs found Bill's number on Maggie, or…? 

So, did Maggie not have anyone listed as her emergency contact? ...And the writers want us to think Scully would stand for that in case of an emergency??

Well... that could be a valuable character beat, we’ll see. 

Mulder telling Scully to immediately go and her “Yeah”ing and going is a good beat, too. They’re acting more like themselves... they’re acting like a 50-something version of themselves, at least; it’s good. 

Don’t ruin this for me, writers. Don’t do it. 

Scully’s gone and DID NO ONE THINK TO CHECK THE SECURITY TAPES??? NO ONE’S DONE THAT, YET????? NO ONE EVEN BOTHERED TO LOOK FOR A SECURITY CAMERA???

Siiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiigh. 

(WHY are we down but looking up into Scully’s face with really weird jumpcuts as she clops out of the building????

WHAT IS THIS. 

This is not displaying her anxiety. It’s portraying impending madness.

THERE ARE FOUR. FOUR. MOUNTED SECURITY CAMERAS. 

Mulder’s gauging the perpetrator's height based off of basketball players; but is this supposed to be a "heehee, haha, that's weirdo Mulder for ya" bit? Because his method is just... sensible and smart. (The other investigator has a split-second “what’s up with this dude?” expression, but that wouldn’t fit here because what Mulder did was, dare I say, normal.) 

None of this is offensive, and it’s not drumming up real anger, so. That’s a win, I guess. 

That street art was put up… this morning? THIS? Morning? How did someone scale and paint and get it all done before Mulder and Scully arrived? 

Whaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaatever. Probably supernatural, anyway. 

Mulder stepped in gum, then had the brilliant idea to preserve it as evidence. Smart. 

Scully’s at the hospital. 

Maggie’s in the hospital, alone. Ah, man. 

This scene’s shot really well thus far. It has the right balance of music, the right balance of silence, the right balance of camera cuts. 

And it’s immediately ruined.

WHEN MAGGIE GAINED CONSCIOUSNESS, SHE REPEATEDLY ASKED FOR "SOMEONE NAMED CHARLIE" AND NOT HER OWN DAUGHTER WHO LIVES IN D.C.

THIS ISN’T MAGGIE, WHAT. 

There had better be a real-- and THOROUGH-- explanation for any of this. Maggie LOVED her little Dana and her daughter Melissa and Bill. But here we’re to assume Charlie has supplanted Melissa as the outcast or Dana as the favorite???

Really. 

(Note from the future: Nope. It might be worse, though.)

To me, Dana was her "favorite"-- her "baby girl"-- all these years. The two always drew comfort and strength from each other, growing closer when Captain Scully passed and the other Scullys drifted away or died off.

But now Maggie wants Charlie. To what, right a wrong???

Scully has been shoved into this new reality of her mom not listing her as an emergency contact and only asking for Charlie-- NOT FOR HER, FOR CHARLIE-- and perhaps having suffered from health complications for a while now without filling her medical doctor daughter in on the details. 

It’s so. Cruel. 

“They’re estranged.” 

CHARLIE’S ESTRANGED FROM MAGGIE. 

WHAT. 

WHERE DID THIS COME FROM. 

I knew there were fandom speculations that Charlie was estranged, but I never knew it had confirmation in canon (well, the Revival canon.)

SO. 

All this time, Charlie didn’t have a problem with his father-- since Bill is Captain Scully’s carbon copy and Charlie always called or communicated through him-- but with his mother. 

What’s Maggie ever done? Honestly, what’s Maggie ever done for this to be her ending? What in canon pointed to estrangement or secrets from her children or whathaveyou?

If anything, this is Tena Mulder 2.0: estrangement from her son, asking for him to come before her death, keeping a health complication secret, dying without providing closure. But that’s not Maggie’s character and never has been. 

I don’t understand this, Morgan and Wong or Morgan or Wong. At what point did you think this was the right decision to make for this character??

I can pick up what the writers are putting down-- no one truly knows another person, even if they think they do, etc.-- the FLAW with that logic is, we know enough about a person to notice if they're acting differently or out-of-character. And Maggie has always been a flamingly consistent person: she can’t hide her feelings and doesn’t feel shame in expressing them, she’s terrible at keeping secrets, and she’s torn apart if excluded from her loved ones’ personal lives. These traits have consistently remained the foundation of her persona. Changing them now-- so suddenly and completely-- is poor if not lazy or "hack" writing.

My fury is not solely because I like Maggie and want her to have a happy ending but because that’s not Maggie-- never has been-- and Maggie Scully would never act the way this Maggie has. 

Regarding Charlie, he was never portrayed as “separate than” the Scully clan-- that was Melissa-- just always busy on military tour or whatever he was doing. He kept in contact with Bill, he let his sister babysit in Home (heh, Home Again, GET IT), and he sent presents to the family through Bill in A Christmas Carol. Maggie never seemed perturbed or disturbed or saddened or emotional when hearing his name or talking about him; and she would have been if there were something amiss. 

“She, she didn’t ask for me, or for Bill, or for her grandchildren?”

The implication here is that Bill has children and Charlie doesn’t-- if Charlie had children, Scully would have assumed Maggie were trying to get in contact with his kids-- her grandchildren-- by calling him. Scully doesn’t say “all her grandchildren” or “her other grandchildren.” Nope. 

So, Charlie’s not a dad, and Bill has more than one kid.  

I do understand he was written as the lone guy with a wife (while Bill had a wife and kids) in Beyond the Sea, but times and lore have changed; and I’m disappointed Morgan and Wong or Morgan or Wong didn’t update their memory, too. 

In a deleted script, Charlie was also, supposedly, single. And yes, that script was never produced, but I find it interesting that he and Melissa were kind of the “unattached” Scully kids, with Melissa being considered the black sheep and Charlie being considered largely absent. 

“Hey, Mom. I’m here. I’ve been where you are. I know Ahab is there. And Melissa.” Um, okay. Something feels off about this, but I can’t pinpoint what. 

“And Mom. I’m here.” That part can stay, wow it kinda got to me. Okay, Revival, you got something out of me. Huh. Don’t butcher this. 

(‘Kay, so, I thiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiink the problem I had with the first statement was that it was a little clunky, a little “remider”y. But it bridges the gap between redundant and old X-Files dialogue, sooooooooooooooooooooo. I’m not sure how to sort it.) 

“Bill, Jr.’s” (guess he’s forever called ‘Junior’, huh… that’s kinda hilarious, but also out of character) “here. And William.” Her crying over William a little, realizing she talked about him voluntarily for the first time, is also a nice touch. “And Charlie. Charlie’s here.” 

Too bad I’m not invested in Maggie because… welp. Review criticisms above. 

“Please, Mom, don’t go home yet. I need you.” 

I do wonder why this is called Home Again-- I get it, it’s a wink-and-nod to M and W’s Home title, but the material doesn’t reaaaally sync. Unless, of course, Maggie’s real proud of “her boys”, and is tossing aside Scully’s importance aside because she never had children.... Well.

…Oh, my word, the two politiciany people on the scene are so highschool play. Stop, please. “Are you threatening me?”/”I’ve been threatening you for six months.”/”Well stop.” UGH. 

Lady calls police-politician-whoever a name and Mulder jokes, “You married?” and mumbles a little as the lady stumbles over her words explaining…. That’s David-humor, not Mulder-humor. 

Mulder having to become the voice of the homeless while hashing out this not-married couples’ couple banter aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaand. Snore.

This is like a little Professor Layton sideplot where you can’t pass down the alley you need to get to if you don’t solve a random villager’s puzzle. Groovy. 

Random homeless guy says “Band aid nose man” to Mulder and walks off. That’s a clue if I’ve ever been beaten upside the head with one. 

Oh, look, the mural’s gone. Groovy. 

WHY are we getting a flashback to Scully’s bedside from One Breath? I get it, I do, nostalgia, etc. etc. HOWEVER, I think this scene would have been better served if we heard Mulder’s voice instead of seen his hand because, I don’t know, Scully was in a coma and didn’t see this happening, I don’t think. Unless she had a bird’s eye view above her body and just hovered there for days, I guess. 

Maggie has a new coin necklace, ooooooh, the woman without secrets had secrets, ooooooooooooooooooooooooooh. Ugh. 

Bill called, and Scully finally called him ‘Bill.’ 

Bill needing to know if Maggie will die before he gets there and demanding expertise from Scully IS a Bill thing to do-- he’s probably not meaning to inflict more trauma on his sister, but he’s never paid attention to what does traumatize her. Nice, nice. 

Maggie wanted to remain on life support, nice, nice, that fits with her  One Breath experience and Catholic values, good. 

That was a REALLY good scene, I will admit. Just having Scully watch someone else’s body be packed up for the morgue while Bill continually leeches answers from her on the other line, I wish that’s how the One Breath flashback had unfolded, too. 

OH, it was a band aid, not gum, that stuck to Mulder’s shoe. 

Why does the undead man need to wear a band aid on his nose. 

Deadman’s neither dead nor undead. ‘Kay. 

Scully’s being hyper-vigilant and boundary crossing into "doctor mode" while keeping an eye on her mom. Bored, trying to distract herself with work, nice, nice. 

MAGGIE MADE A NEW DIRECTIVE WITHOUT TELLING SCULLY ABOUT IT. WHAT IS THIS, PAYBACK FOR WHAT HER DAUGHTER DID?????? But if this is payback to Scully, why is she ALSO punishing Bill??? Because Bill is being inadvertently punished: he was left in the dark, too, and only called incidentally. And even if that's the case, Scully's punishment is still WORSE. Whyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy. Because of William???

Sorry, that’s not a Maggie thing to do. She mended fences between her husband and youngest daughter, embraced her despite the chaos of her life, even forgave her after the whole cancer debacle (being kept in the dark then forced into secrecy without the healthy outlet of discussion.) 

MAGGIE’S JUST NOT VINDICTIVE, SHE’S NOT. WHY IS SHE NOW????????????????????????????????????????????????

Dudes are collecting the homeless paintings and selling them. 

So the painting wasn’t---

OKAY, WAIT. 

The mural (plural?) isn't supernatural. 

Despite being completely finished and all materials being cleared away before Mulder appeared on the crime scene. 

Despite two arthouse dealers swiping it before Mulder even walked away from the crime scene. 

Despite them swiping it (hauling a ladder over, climbing it, unpinning the painting or whatever, climbing down, and scooting off) within minutes of Mulder seeing it from the window, checking the cameras, and going out to investigate.

With police swarming everywhere. After Mulder let the head of the team know he wanted to investigate the mural.  

What. 

Scully’s still dealing with this alone, ‘kay. 

Not against that, either, because Mulder is busy and that is a thing he would do, even in his 50s. It’s how he operates. It’s how Scully expects him to operate. It’s how he operated when his own mother was on her deathbed (and after.) So, nice. 

Maggie’s gonna get extubated. 

The William screen thing keeps happening. Wish it WOULDN’T. At least do a zoom-in or weird camera angle then, not when Scully’s weirdly stumbling down the stairs. 

Mulder’s here. That’s nice. Another thumbs up from me. 

THIS is how you do character development: both characters acted on their modus operandi, but Mulder has grown enough to set aside time for Scully, to be there for her and help her. This isn’t after her mother’s death or after tragedy or after the truth has slipped through his fingers, this is during the long wait. Mulder’s still himself, but he’s also grown, too; and that growth hasn’t been shoved in our faces or jumped from A to B without proper explanation. Here, we get to see him make the choice and grow as a person. Further, Scully’s reaction lets us know this is NEW for her partner; and that she’s immensely grateful and touched to know he won’t leave her to do this alone.

THAT’s how it’s done. 

Case stuff, who cares. 

Mulder can’t stay. Scully’s going through it, doesn’t understand why her mother’s done what she’s done. Even Mulder’s surprised. 

Disclaimer: this isn't The X-Files of old. These scenes may be good-- excellently acted, not too shabbily written-- but Mulder and Scully still don’t feel like Mulder or Scully. The characters (when not poorly written or wildly butchered) don’t even come close to the essence of IWTB, at times: as badly as that movie fell apart, at least Mulder and Scully retained a spark of their original selves. Here? DD and GA act as twins or doppelgangers. They’re not Mulder and Scully, they’re Clone!Mulder and Clone!Scully who exist separately from the juvenile nature of the cases they investigate, who exist only to sit near each other and talk over their past, and whose very existence and nature are determined by the writing flavor of the week. There’s no cohesion and no point to the plots-- there’s only a hint of Mulder and Scully, and, hopefully, a quiet second for the characters to absorb. And that’s not even a guarantee, anymore. 

Mulder following after Scully and gently pulling her back when Maggie needs to be extubated-- good character moment. Scully not caring about the bigger questions right now-- also a good character moment.

The unfortunate darting on Scully’s top makes it look like she’s really cold in that hospital. (What an oddly constructed shirt, anyway. …Kinda just want to stare, marveling that it’s both: stiff and silkyish, has buttons and doesn’t, and isn’t naturally low-cut but is? ...I don’t miss 2015's fashion.)  

A Home music number as someone gets murdered? Siiiiiiiiiiiiiiigh. 

Buuuuut why the lady and not the politician-police-guy? What? Why? 

ANOTHER bit of character growth: not only does Mulder show up, but he stays. Ding, ding, ding! Good writer, that’s a good writer! 

Though this all washes over and away because it’s in service of a Not-Maggie, so. Consider my investment shot. 

Here are the lines I always read in gif sets:

“Back in the day, didn’t we ever come across the ability to just… wish someone back to life?”

“I invented it. When you were back in the hospital. Like this.” 

“You’re a dark wizard, Mulder.” 

See, those lines coulda been cheesy; but they were tempered and calmly handled. (Good writers, good writers, who’s a good writer!) 

“What else is new?” Mulder adds, and laughs at his own joke. Self-deprecation and amusement in that one. And Scully is cheered up a little by it, too. Thumbs up, DD and GA.

Charlie called. Scully begging Charlie to “do what I can’t do” caught Mulder’s attention, as it did mine. That’s an interesting dynamic that could have been explored: she said it quite flippantly; and that’s a VERY big “I’ve just held you back” tell.

Aww, well. A question for a better series, I suppose. 

AND Scully thinks Maggie will come back if Charlie talks to their mom. WOW, okay, that’s a lot... and will never be explored again. Ah, well. Again, a better series. 

Charlie sounds how I expected him to, huh. 

OH, NOW Maggie wakes up. 

They all think it’s a miracle and then Maggie thinks Mulder’s Charlie. That made me laugh, I’m sorry. …Or am I? 

WAIT, she didn't, scratch that. It's worse.

Maggie came back to say, “My son… is named William, too.” 

Um. 

Uuuuuuuuuuum. 

UUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUM. 

She really woke up, recognized both of them, then ignored her daughter, grabbed onto Mulder, and commiserated with HIM about their sons named William. As if she related to all of Mulder’s hardships and gave Scully absolutely zero grace or mercy. 

That’s cold.  

AND SCULLY’S SO DEVASTATED because she woke up that morning not knowing her mother had effectively cut her out of her life. Because of the past. Because of William. 

WAIT. Wait. wait WAIT. 

None of this makes sense. 

Scully has been seeing ‘William’ all day on her phone. At first, we the audience assume that’s her continual guilt. 

It’s revealed Maggie has open wounds over ‘William’, as well. 

Maggie wakes up only to utter “My son… is named William, too”, which suddenly introduces a supernatural element to the messages on Scully’s phone. 

But the only time Scully’s gotten supernatural messages in the past is from MELISSA. 

So did Melissa try to connect with Scully to prepare her for Maggie’s final message before Maggie woke up? Did Melissa do that ever since Maggie collapsed, from the very first phonecall Scully received? 

And if that’s the case… did Melissa hang out with Maggie in that forest with Ahab, but try to make connections with her living sister to prepare her?

And if so………………….. That’s the worst possible way to do it, giving Scully new layers of guilt and depression from failing her mother and reliving the moment she failed her son. 

That’s… that’s. Melissa levels of unawareness, but she’s supposed to be all-knowing or less… Melissa in the afterlife, right???? If this is even Melissa????

And if it wasn’t Melissa, WHAT WAS THIS ALL ABOUT?????

Maggie wanted Charlie, she wakes when he talks, she ignores Scully completely-- who’s been by her side since coming back from being on-the-run, supposedly-- and talks about WILLIAM with MULDER. 

It’s all so tangled and confusing. And, just. Mean. So unbelievably mean-spirited. To come back from the brink not when your daughter begs you to but because your son called while keeping said daughter and your other son out of the loop-- Bill was called by chance, after all-- and never leave clearer answers or messages or love or anything.... 

Wow. 

Wow, wow, wow. 

Tena’s was the worst death, but this angers me just as much because they did this to Maggie. 

Yep, she’s dead. 

SHE NEVER SAID A WORD TO CHARLIE, EITHER. 

Her estranged son finally called and she died without speaking a word to him, or looking around for his voice, or anything. 

Wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooow I’m mad. 

At least the episode’s not pretending to be a casefile. 

UH OH, here comes the (can’t remember the name, help me out) morgue bed. Scully’s panicking over it, Mulder has to go wrangle her (gently) AND THIS IS THE FIRST TIME I’VE FELT THE ESSENCE OF SCULLY other than a smirk or a smile. THAT’s Scully-- the fire, the fury, the indignation. 

“Margaret” is what Mulder calls Maggie. Can’t remember if that’s canonical, either. Oh, wait, he called her “Mrs. Scully” in the past. Eh, it makes sense he changed it to Margaret. 

Wait, does that mean “Maggie” was her husband’s endearment, and everyone else called her “Margaret?” The “Scully” and “Dana” nicknaming duality got a little more layered. If, if, if.  

Scully’s beating herself up about William, but at least she says, “That we gave away” which means she considers Mulder a part of herself and her decision (and that he’s drilled that truth into her head until it stuck.) 

“Why did she say that?” Because the script told her actress to do so. “Why did she have to say that?” I know, cruel, isn’t it?

Not getting Mulder from this scene, either. David can act, but he’s tooooooooooo… muted, here. Mulder would have given a little more. 

The last frame hanging on his face is okay, though. Still too… muted. 

Only one type of spray paint on crime scene evidence, one search on Scully’s part, next clue found in three seconds. Because that’s how life works. 

Scully still struggling with her mother’s death, not clued in. Mulder whistling after leaving the shop, really subtle, but a fine character tidbit. 

SCULLY JUST DROPKICKED THE--

NO. 

NO. 

NO. 

THAT’S NOT HOW PHYSICS WORK. 

SCULLY’S LITTLE TWIG ARMS AND LEG AREN'T TAKING ANYONE DOWN-- LET ALONE A GROWN MAN-- WITH A TEENY TWIST-FLIP-KICK MANEUVER, ON STILTS. 

WHAT. I thought that scene happened in the computer simulation whatever episode. WHATWHATWHATWHATWHAT. 

I can hear 90s David screaming about feminism from here. 

The case continues to descend into “who cares?"ville.

The kid gets away because Mulder doesn’t do stairs anymore. And though we're all with Mulder in spirit, this is his job.

“Mulder, back in the day I used to do ‘stairs’ and in three-inch heels.” ‘Kay, Barbie. But Ken didn’t. 

“Back in the day…. Scully, back in the day is ‘now.’” …..

………..

……………

……………….

What. 

What did that dialogue have to do with the kid getting away and Mulder not chasing him? If “back in the day is now”, then Mulder would have done stairs and caught the kid.

“Back in the day is now” doesn’t make sense even if you two flash your lights over it. 

OH, LOOK, THE FLASHLIGHTS ARE CROSSING AGAIN, GET IT. 

We’re, like, four episodes in and Mulder and Scully are still slowly getting back in the groove of The X-Files. 

OH, LOOK, THE CAMERA SHOT IS HOLDING ON THE FLASHLIGHTS MAKING AN X, DID YOU NOTICE IT YET???? Yes, yes we did. 

WHAT WAS THAT. A rubber mask and suit popped out, hit the wall in front of them, and fell back into the shadows????

That was as convincing as the rabbit fur puppets mauling Gillian’s face. 

Hurry it up, I don’t care about the case. 

Mulder doesn’t do stairs but can kick the door in with one try in his tight, tight Patriarchy Pants. 

I can hear 90s David screaming about feminism from here. 

Grotesque clay masks, got it. Okay. All right. I’m bored. 

A new character, the garbage man, is going on about homeless being treated like trash. ‘Kay. 

He’s the artist? What. Doesn’t... what. He wouldn’t have time to put up the art after the murder but before--

Forget it. 

Oh, it wasn’t him. They were… supernatural? What. 

THIS TRASH GUY MADE A TULPA OUT OF TRASH. 

HOW DARE YOU RIP OFF MY TRASH BABY TULPA EPISODE. HOW DAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARE YOU. 

I DIDN’T SIGN UP FOR THIS TRASH RIPPING OFF MY TRASH. 

GET OUTTA HERE. 

ACTUALLY GET OUTTA HERE. GO ON, SHOO. BEAT IT. SCRAM. GET LOST. 

AND NOW THEY’RE SAYING 'TULPA' WAS A MISTRANSLATION????? OH, THAT’S RICH. SO WHAT HAPPENED IN ARCADIA WASN’T A TULPA, BUT THIS ONE MIGHT BE. 

THAT’S REAL CUTE. 

A realized Tibetan thought form would never harm someone or kill. 

But what if… hang on with me a second… what if it already did? 

This guy willed it, so it happened. 

This is giving Scully an idea. Guess she’s gonna manifest Maggie from the dead. Or manifest William from the clouds, I suppose. Or manifest herself a better wig, I reckon. 

WHAT IN THE EXISTENCE FLASHBACKS IS THIS. HOW IS SCULLY COMPARING HER SON’S BIRTH TO WILLING A MONSTER INTO EXISTENCE?????? I, I, WHAT. NO. NO, DON’T DO THIS. THIS IS BAD, THIS IS VERY NOT GOOD. 

“He came to me,” the guy explains, and Scully now thinks William came to her???

Is… is this a revelation or a mental breakdown????????

“But in the end, he told me what he wanted to be.” 

ARE YOU SERIOUS RIGHT NOW??? IMPLYING THAT WILLIAM WANTED TO BE PUT UP FOR ADOPTION-- SHOWING HIM CRYING IN S9-- IN ORDER TO GIVE SCULLY SOME CLOSURE ON THAT MATTER AFTER HER MOTHER’S RECENT DEATH???????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????

NO ONE TOLD ME THIS. NO ONE WARNED ME. 

THE AUDACITY OF THE WRITERS.  

SHAME, ACTUAL SHAME, ON THEM. 

…I will take all this back if the script does, but WHAT IN THE WORLD. THIS IS INSANE. 

Never have I EVER seen Scully so broken mentally. Wow. Morgan and Wong or Morgan or Wong love her character? I’d think they view her as the band aid on their shoe. Wow. 

(Note from the future: They don't take back any of this implication, only gaslight us into believing Scully was thinking a totally other, very normal thing about "responsibility." Which is utter doodoo.)

“All we do, is hold the pencil. All we do, is hold the clay. I think there must be spirits or souls--” GET OUT OF HERE WITH THAT FIELD WHERE I DIED GARBAGE. GET. OUT. YOU BUTCHERED THAT EPISODE THROUGH YOUR OWN SHEER INCOMPETENCE, YOU CAN’T TRY TO REWRITE IT NOW THROUGH ANOTHER LENS TO MAKE US SWALLOW YOUR POISON LIKE PUNCH. 

GET. 

OUT. 

OF. 

HERE. 

“And if you think so hard, if you want them real bad, they’ll come to you.” 

Stunning. 

A thought experiment that would be interesting to tap into when explaining the *insert words* of The Field Where I Died’s plot, but is ABSOLUTELY. IRRESPONSIBLY. IDIOTIC. here in light of the sheer amount of trauma you are putting Scully through, right this second. 

Full disclosure: I don’t care how many bad things are done to the characters-- I really don’t-- IF those experiences give weight or add to their stories or history. THIS, HOWEVER, DOES NOT. 

I’M FURIOUS. I’M SO FURIOUS I MIGHT TEAR UP. 

HOW DARE YOU INSERT EXISTENCE FLASHBACKS TO--

i’m done. let’s just move on. 

I’m struck anew with how these characters aren’t Mulder and Scully-- not even S9 Scully-- when both scenes are positioned back-to-back. 

I just knew this episode would be butchered, but never would I ever…. 

By the way, to catch us back up to speed, Scully’s having this… revelation while a garbage man rambles about the MURDERING THOUGHT FORM he dreamt into being. 

Also, the cuts and flashbacks A. reinforce my disdain of this series, B. are cheesy and corny, and C. are ham-fisted and clunky. You know how it should have been done? Without the flashbacks. Not one soul who is watching this episode needs to be hand-held through Scully’s memories, especially ones we’ve already seen mere minutes ago. 

Scully’s clutching her cross after remembering her mom’s words, ‘kay. 

I LAUGHED AGAIN. 

Mulder’s been listening to this guy and looks over and does a doubletake because Scully’s frozen LIKE THIS: 

Mental. Health. 

Also, considering what happens to Jackson’s character later on… this episode is kind of implying Scully was so terrified by the constant tragedy in her life that she willed a tulpa-alien-god baby into existence (or WOULD have, if given the opportunity, which is worse) for her own selfish reasons, or for the world’s protection; then yeeted it to the adoption agency, anyway. (Note from the future: This implication doesn't make broad canonical sense, and is kinda reverted, later, but:) ...Which plugs dangerously well into her disavowal of William in My Struggle IV. Which makes me hate Home Again even more.

(Also also, that turns Scully into Arcadia's Gogolak. Stellar writing.)

Siiiiiiiiiiiiiiiigh, have to break this down. 

If Scully thought William into existence, he wouldn’t be a normal baby in S8. Which he was. He also wouldn’t be a magic baby with independent will in S9 (who is closer to the alien DNA kids in Founder’s Mutation that cut themselves out of their moms to survive, but ANYWAY.) He’d be a thought form controlled by one impulse. A tulpa. Or-- let’s extrapolate-- a Supersoldier like Billy Miles. Which he wasn’t.

If Scully is comparing herself to the Syndicate that brought beings into a tormented existence for their own ends (or to the garbage guy’s intent) and is… freed? by that thought…. She needs help-- not “go to therapy, babe”, no, actual, real, extensive help outside of the FBI and away from work, period, for awhile. That’s so incredibly unbalanced it’s… kinda scary. 

Also, again, if Scully willed Jackson into Existence-- say, by touching the alien spaceship?-- the timeline wouldn’t match her late S7 pregnancy-- but what else is new-- but would condemn her for Jackson’s later erratic actions, anyway. 

And therefore, Scully becoming pregnant in My Struggle IV would have to be an actual, literal miracle because she didn’t taint it with a thought-form or alien DNA or any other thing this episode or Founder’s Mutation or the other Struggles are suggesting.

Any of these possibilities are foul. If William exists, he’d have to be a normal baby (as he was until the writers changed him) or it would crumble the very meaning of his birth and the leadup to it from Requiem to Existence. 

It. just. doesn’t. make. sense. and. continues. to. be. cruel. 

Scully now thinks she’s responsible for “making the problem” and Mulder’s like “huH” and “UHOH” at the same time. 

Okay, let’s say M+W or M or W take the aforementioned implication back: this scene is utterly and unfathomably cruel, a cherry on top of the other cruelty they put Scully through this episode. 

I’m gonna say it: at least Chris Carter gave William to Scully. 

“You’re just as bad as the people that you hate,” a.k.a. "You did a bad thing by playing god and creating life only to abandon it." 

Thanks M+W, I really needed “Scully comparing herself to the Consortium” on my list of Unexpected Things to Hate, that was nice. 

NOW the tulpa’s going after the politician-policeman. Not before killing the woman who wanted the homeless on the streets if they preferred, but after, now that he's moving them into a nicer facility. 

Oh, the guy’s soooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo evil because one of the homeless people's dog’s temporarily at an animal shelter. Well, yeah it was kinda evil to separate them (temporarily.) Had to make politician-police dude eviler, I guess. 

He smells something bad, oh, nooooooooooo…………….

Guys, gonna be honest. How’s this politician-police-whoever guy bad? He’s callous, but he’s moving the unhoused into housing where they can, hopefully, have better access to resources to get back on their feet. 

…What’s the moral here? That no one treats them like people, therefore the tulpa or thought form will kill indiscriminately? Even if the homeless might be benefiting? That the garbage man just didn’t like HOW policeman-politician-whoever was operating, so thought up a tulpa to kill him and the others?

Slow clap for the stupidest morality tale I’ve seen in a bit. 

I. just. Can the writers craft an episode where the homeless are actually being victimized? 

Oh, wait, the 90s already did that. Huh. 

Poli-man’s about to be murdered. Mulder and Scully arrive and gently jaunt down the hall towards his screams. That’s cute. 

They were literally FOUR. SECONDS. too late. Then don’t express a sense of remorse or whatever that they were. And this guy isn’t villain- enough to be given zero remorse, c’mon, save that for the big 'uns. 

Tulpa’s vanishing instead of walking away, I guess. 

Scully’s too calm for acknowledging they just heard politician-policeman die. He was screaming for help and you two didn’t speed up. 100% they wouldn’t be able to pass the FBI field tests. A witness-victim-whatever just died because they were FOUR SECONDS late, that shouldn't have happened.

The gymnastics of this plot, summed up: 

Monster always leaves band aids behind, I guess. 

Garbage man made the band aid sculpture’s face into a smiley so it's gone forever, I GUESS. 

Wait, LAKE SCENE??

THAT’S IT???

THIS IS IT??????????????????????

“I know now why Mom asked for Charlie even if he was out of her life.” OH, THIS HAD BETTER BE GOOD and not  A. “she’s a mom, so she loved and missed him” or B. “she created him so he mattered.” Because neither of those answers explains what she did and didn’t do or say to the two children that stuck by her. 

*sharpens harpoon*

*THUNK*

I KNEW IT. 

SHE WANTED TO KNOW BEFORE SHE LEFT THAT HE’D BE OKAY. 

Then WHY did she ignore Charlie on the phone and TALK TO MULDER while laying on another layer of guilt about William WITH HER DAUGHTER, who'd been pleading for Maggie to come back to her, RIGHT THERE???

Just because Maggie “gave birth to him” doesn’t mean anything. 

Like. 

Guys. 

Of course she wants to know her son’s okay, of course. She raised him, she loved him, etc. 

But. But but but. 

If she’s the loving mother we all knew from the OG series that SUDDENLY took a dive into secrecy and distrust and guilt-tripping, there would have been signs. Scully missed all of them, didn’t even know her mom had her living will signed by other veteran sailors (AND WHO ARE THEY?), doesn't even know what the quarter lore is.

 You can’t have Maggie want to know her baby’s okay while actively neglecting and ignoring the others. You can’t. 

*sharpens second, third, and fourth harpoon*

“She made him. He’s her responsibility.” 

*THUNKKITY THUNK THUNK*

OH. MY. WORD. 

THIS IS SO TWISTED. 

Scully is now being guilted for giving up William, AGAIN, because she needs to "take responsibility" for him. 

Canonically, she gave him up because she was taking responsibility for him-- to protect him, to take care of him. 

And whether that decision was justified or not-- it wasn’t-- S9 Scully and IWTB Scully and pre-this-episode Scully and Mulder made the best they could of that decision for their son’s sake.

A.k.a. Responsibility. 

HOW DOES THAT TRANFSER ONTO MAGGIE? What responsibility does she have to take?? Perhaps she drove Charlie away?? But none of her behavior thus far would have driven him away. 

So, not only has Maggie’s character been harpooned on her deathbed, but her past off-screen behavior must also be harpooned in order to justify that "responsibility" line: a.k.a., she must have been a horrible person to Charlie, and must want to take responsibility for that action now. 

Because “responsibility” doesn’t fit IF Charlie walked away of his own accord for his own reasons, separate from his mother’s actions or behavior. 

Also, “responsibility” doesn’t fit PERIOD with either scenario: Scully already took responsibility for William when she sent him away (as stupidly as that decision was written, it wasn’t written for any other pretense) but Maggie DIDN’T take “responsibility” because she didn’t even apologize or question or talk to or whatever with Charlie. She did it WITH MULDER, and even THEN she was urging HIM to take responsibility of William, if anything. 

Know what’s worse? They’re saying all the pain Scully is going through (and put Mulder and her family through) is because she hasn’t taken responsibility for William, and that she needs to go find him and make it right. IGNORING THE FACT THAT IT WAS REVIVAL MULDER, NOT SCULLY, WHO PUT WILLIAM BEHIND HIM. IF ANYTHING, IT WAS SCULLY WHO TOOK RESPONSIBILITY ALL THESE YEARS. 

Which means Scully is culpable for everyone’s emotions and pain and trauma because she gave her son away for his safety. AND I DON’T EVEN AGREE WITH HER DECISION-- there’s no way she would have given William up, and most certainly not that way-- BUT YOU WRITE SCULLY INTO AN IMPOSSIBLE SITUATION, THEN PUNISH AND REVICTIMIZE HER AT THE HANDS OF HER OWN MOTHER IN ORDER TO "OWN UP" TO "RESPONSIBILITY." 

I’m... pretty mad.

I should be furious, really, because this does unfathomable damage to… everyone. But My Struggle I's and Founder’s Mutation's brain rot runs deeper-- by comparison this is a 0.5 to its -1,000,000. 

At least we know what the coin necklace date was supposed to mean: the date Charlie walked out of Maggie’s life. “Responsibility” and all that garbage.  

“She wanted us to be responsible…. To make sure William’s okay, even if we can’t see him.” That is NOT what Maggie said, and that is NOT what she meant. “My son… is named William, too” was a commiserating statement spoken to MULDER, indicating he, like her, suffered from an estrangement. And who would be the enforcer or creator of that estrangement? The same woman who broke up with Mulder over depression (before he had a meltdown or breakdown, despite knowing his history of suicidal tendencies.) 

The Revival does Scully (and her mother… and Mulder…) so dirty it’s. Ugh. 

Can someone knock Not-Maggie's ashes over onto the ground or something? That way she can join her brethren, the dirt.  

Let’s be honest, this Home Again should have been further down the season. ‘Cuz if Babylon’s next… guess they didn’t look for William. 

Scully’s smoker voice makes its first appearance, ugh. Code broken: GA uses smoker voice when Scully is feeling teary or depressed. 

UGH. 

“...To keep him safe. That it was for his own good to put him up for adoption. But I can’t help but think of him, Fox.” The requires the special 'what', *ahem*: WAHT. 

“I believe you will find all of your answers--” ALL. OF. YOUR. ANSWERS?

“And I will be there when you do.” WHEN YOU DO?! What is she, an elementary school teacher holding Mulder's hand while he explores around the gymnasium??????????????? Where’s the Scully who insisted this was her quest, too???? ...wwwwwWHAT.

This is. This is. Guys. Why. 

“But my mysteries… I’ll never have answered.” 

Um. Scully can’t figure out how to find William?

She can’t, just, go back to the agency and offer to connect with her son? 2012’s over-- the world might end, still, but CSM’s dead (as far as she knows), APPARENTLY there are no aliens or Supersoldiers, and no one’s cared about her and Mulder getting back on the files.... Where is THIS coming from???? Just ring up the agency, Scully! 

UUUUUUUUUG.

“...If he’s ever been afraid, and wishes I were there. Does he doubt himself, because we left him?”

While Scully continues to speak, I must add: Mulder looks like a browbeaten 50s housewife. I love watching DD’s acting as much as GA’s, but David’s giving nothing here. I KNOW it’s a direction issue because he’s been consistently this key the entire episode (except for the... comedy or “dark wizard” scene) so SOMEONE wants Mulder to be this way. But.  

But it doesn’t line up with his character from the previous eps.  

And the previous episodes don’t line up with each other. 

And all the Revival eps. don't line up with IWTB.

Or S9.

Or canon.

Etc., etc.  

“What… questions does he have of me? The same that I have of this quarter?” Um. I thought we concluded that was the date Charlie walked out. 

Isn’t Scully the investigator, here? Maggie kept that quarter necklace secret, Maggie kept her health secret, and Maggie only wanted to talk to Charlie-- ergo, Charlie’s connected to the quarter necklace. And if it’s not his birthday, it’s the date he left. Ergo, voila. 

“And I want to believe--” yeah, yeah, yeah, “--that we didn’t treat him like trash.” 

This doesn’t match. 

The writing treated him like trash because Scully was written to give him up for no reason. (Perhaps "like garbage" is a fun dig at CC's decision, but Scully ends up taking the damage for it.)

Scully herself didn’t treat William like trash-- she was trying to protect him. 

In short: writers = trash; Scully = not trash. Scully’s decision = trash, Scully’s canonical reason = not trash. 

Are we following canon now, writers? Have you caught up WITH YOUR OWN SHOW?

Mulder decides against talking, opting to pull her into a hug, instead. 

Um. 

Whhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhere’s the reassurance, Mulder. You reassured her in Founder’s Mutation quite soundly, but not. Here. When she’s in crisis.

Groovy. Stellar. Ugh.  

...WELP, that’s the end, I GUESS. 

CONCLUSION

What. was. that. 

Thanks for reading~

Enjoy!

[stxrry-dxys]

i said i wasn’t gonna say more on the whole watcher debacle but sorry i just have to talk about the ai art allegations cuz holy shit this is a massive oversight.

before going in i’d like to clarify that i don’t think steven, ryan, or shane personally implemented this BUT it was absolutely their responsibility to check over what their crew members put in their videos.

disclaimer that i did not personally find these, they were brought up through reddit threads on the snark and main subreddit.

this is the most egregious one. look at the hands. the unnatural length of the fingers. the NUMBER of fingers, the way the hands curl. that is not a mistake a human artists makes. and the way the clothes distort, the fact that one of the shirts looks like it has a finger hanging out of it. in what world is this not obviously computer generated.

this one is harder to notice, but pay attention to the bars on the boat, how they’re uneven, wobbly, some even stopping and starting up randomly. the boat’s reflection in the water does not reflect back the actual silhouette of the boat. the silhouettes of the people are harder to see but a lot of them look more like wonky blobs, though admittedly this part is rather weak.

this is the one i think i believe the least but am bringing it up anyways for posterity. the foot is wonky and the back one appears to be missing. his proportions are very off. and i cant say for certain but i seriously doubt a shadow would be that thin from this angle. this one is probably the weakest piece of evidence but feels relevant to include anyways.

there’s more i believe but it’s 3 am and i don’t wanna go personally hunting for it.

this isn’t even a new topic, people have brought it up in comments and threads in the past. and i know good and well this goes against morals that they have brought up before, so this is not quite the look you’d want. using ai art that steals from other creatives to claim as it’s own is not something i’d hope to see from a company that prides itself on being high quality art. it is entirely possible this is just the doing of someone on the art or editing team, but when one of your figureheads and his wife is openly against generative ai like this, you would expect quality control to ensure this never happens.

i hope they’ll speak up about this, and either prove that this isn’t the case or deal with whoever implemented this, though i’m doubtful they will. if they don’t address it and continue to use ai generated art then i hope everyone all has a long look at whether or not this company is as genuine in its passion for creativity as they have tried to appear.

honestly either way i don’t care, im done with these three’s content and have been for a while, but those of you still supporting deserve all the information you can as they proceed forward with this “plan” of theirs. make whatever decision you want regarding this, i wish you all the very best.

[lolotheparagon]

Rating Every TNBA Redesign Cos Why Not

The New Batman Adventures was the last season of the infamous Batman the Animated Series, although it moved to another less strict network. Because the producers wanted to do crossovers with the Superman animated series, they gave the series and its characters a more streamlined style to it. Now I dont wanna blame Bruce Timm entirely since there were many artists on staff back then who did the redesigns but because I hate this coomer, Im going to anyway. In BTAS, you can tell each character apart and they have their own unique outfits and looks to them. But here, these are some of the most unimaginative superhero/villain designs Ive ever seen. Although some did surprise me and were not that bad. So, for a bit of fun, here's my look at each Batman character's redesign in the final (and worst) season of the show.

(Not counting Robin cos he's a different character to Dick Grayson or characters that had very little changes like Clayface or Harley Quinn)

Batman

The big emo rodent himself. For his redesign, I like the more sleek look to Batman's cape...thats it. His original design is really hard to perfect. Its got everything. Why tamper with perfection?

Batgirl

I actually kinda like Batgirl's redesign. The yellow gloves and boots really help her stand out and its the one of the few times the darker toned outfits actually accentuate a design rather than ruin it. Too bad Bruce Timm couldn't stop salivating over her and the rest of the women in this show. So next time you see someone consider Bruce Timm this legendary storyteller of Batman, give them a healthy reminder that he shipped this college girl character with her mentor/surrogate uncle figure FOR YEARS.

Alfred

Its like they sucked away all of Alfred's snark and replaced it with a cardboard cutout. Literally, he looks so sterile and empty. Who had the idea of making Alfred look more bored and done with everything? Also whats wrong with his chin??

Commissioner Gordon

Good ole Commissioner Pringle got off pretty much unscathed but I think they made him a touch too old considering they gave him a more lanky body, which makes him look more feeble and weak. Dude looks old enough to be Babs' grandad

Joker

Ohhhhh boy. So Joker's redesign is infamously considered by fans as one of the show's worst redesigns, to a point even the showrunners were like yeahh. And thats not unwarranted. He looks like an inverted Dr Draken and im so glad they redesigned him again for Batman Beyond and onward.

Seriously he's A CLOWN WHERES THE MAKE UP?!!

Two-Face

I know Two Face is just a redrawn version of the original design with the TNBA streamlined art style but I want to draw special attention to the monster side of Dent's face. Notice in the original it looks more manic and feral? Heavily contrasted with the conflicted, guilty look on Dent's normal side? But here, in the redesign the monster side is less scary and Dent looks way too bored and angry. The overuse of black lines doesnt help.

Catwoman

She looks like Harley Quinn or Barbara wearing a catsuit. Starting to see a pattern here?

Baby Doll

Its a tough call cos they both look very good but Im gonna lean towards the redesign cos shes got that creepy doll look down to a T (Annabelle would be proud) whereas her original design looked more like a Tiny Toons character.

Scarface and the Ventriloquist

I like the redesign cos of the exaggerated style of the rest of the show perfectly captures Scarface since he's, yknow, a puppet and having the Ventriloquist be shown to be scared and submissive really does show how the puppet is ironically the puppetmaster.

Penguin

Actually I like both of them. They both give off that sophisticated element Penguin is known for and after so many reiterations of him being this crass Scouse-talking crime boss, its nice to see versions of him going back to his rich asshole roots.

Bane

In the original, he has a luchador-style mask and wrestling suit fitting his Spanish roots. Here, he straight up looks like a gimp. Its really bad. Embrace your heritage, Bane!

Riddler

They went from Frank Gorshin to Jim Carrey for Riddler (fitting cos Batman Forever came during TNBA's development) and I love that. So I love both of them. Nice to see a villain with some fucking colour in TNBA cos im tired of seeing all this black outfits. Also his cane being an extended question mark instead of a question mark on top of a regular cane is genius.

Mad Hatter

Both of them fit Hatter's deranged stalker vibes perfectly, but I wish they kept the colour scheme for the redesign cos Hatter's new colour scheme looks too rounded and doesnt stand out.

Poison Ivy

Killer Croc

Finally, now he looks like an actual crocodile instead of whatever the hell he was supposed to be!

Scarecrow

Okay, who the fuck decided to make Scarecrow look like the Babadook? Cos I want to give them a raise. Holy mother of piss, that is terrifying. That shit belongs in the Arkham games. I still prefer the old design cos it has that perfect blend of goofy and gothic. He looks like a Cacturne now that I think about it.

Mr Freeze

HONEY WHAT HAVE THEY DONE TO YOU?!! WHY DO YOU LOOK LIKE A FUCKING FUTURAMA HEAD?!! WHAT IN THE ACTUAL FUCK?! YOU HURT MY HUSBAND, TIMM, NOW ITS PERSONAL

[cnidarianrui]

psst can i rq some tiny shinonomes hcs???

OF COURSE~!! ^_−☆

Headcanons under the cut! Thank you for the ask, anon!!

...(i didn't know if you wanted headcanons of akito and ena separately, or together, so i did both! I hope you enjoy!!)

AKITO U・x・U

I personally headcanon Akito as a kid regressor, around 5-8 when he's little!! He is definitely a little brother regressor, even with people other than Ena! He just has little brother energy!

Secretly so clingy!!! It's not something he wants people to know, but when he's small and with someone he really trusts, he will always be close to them!!

With Vivid Bad Squad, he tries to hide when he's feeling a bit smaller than usual, but his partners are quite good at picking up on his small traits, and the slightest affection and care from them makes him the smallest boy!!!

Surprisingly picky when small. Carrots are obviously a big no-no, but it's hard to get the little guy to eat any veggies when he's small!! Why would you eat anything other than pancakes and cheesecakes?

Surprisingly, a great playmate!!! He gets along much better with people when he's small, and enjoys playing! With older regressors he can play sports, with smaller ones he can color and play pretend with!

ENA U^ェ^U

Like my headcanons for Akito's age, I believe Ena is a kid regressor, probably around age 6 on average! She maintains her pride even when she's small, standing firm on being a big girl when she's small, even though some petnames or sweet affection has her feeling so small!

Her artistic flair doesn't disappear when she regresses! However, her art makes a shift, from painting with brushes, to finger-painting! She makes the most beautiful pieces for her friends, being the talented little creator she is!

With Niigo meeting at 1 A.M., a little Ena struggles to stay awake for that meeting. There have been a few occasions of Ena regressing and falling asleep to the sounds of her friends voices on Nightcord, but it's so adorable to think about, how could they possibly mind?

The plushies in her room get the most use when she's little. If she is feeling lonely and can't chat with any of her friends, she has sleepovers with her plushies!! And, of course, she still enjoys selfies and photoshoots when little, so she can occasionally dress her plushies up and take photos with them to send to her friends!!! (they find these photos so cute)

We all know Ena is very stylish and aesthetic, caring about her appearance greatly, which carries over into her regressions! She loves playing dress up, having so much fun, being a pretty princess, a famous artist, a model, anything she can imagine while going through her closet!! ...she's a bit shy about this pastime, but she enjoys it so much!!!!

TOGETHER!!

You might not assume this from first impressions of the Shinonomes, but they are some of the cuddliest regressors ever!!! Playmates, caregivers, and especially eachother, they cuddle with all of them!! When the Shinonomes are small and sleepy, they cuddle up together with plushies and nap!!! They were a bit shy about it at first, but its grown into an important part of their bond when regressed.

Ena is occasionally quite whiny when she's little, wanting to play, color, cuddle, dress up, and being denied these fun activities only makes her whinier. Luckily, Akito, who I believe is an amazing playmate, is always up for it!! Anything for his big, or sometimes little, sis!

While there is some snark and argument in their relationship still, it is definitely muddled. Regressing is a very comfy, safe thing for them, and part of this comfort involves their happiness together. They play fight, wrestle a bit, horse around, but at the end of the day, the two siblings care about eachother deeply.

THANK YOU FOR READING, AND AS ALWAYS, HAVE A GREAT DAY, EVENING, AND NIGHT!!!!

[wordrage]

PSA: Fandom is a Party, Not a Market

It's been a couple decades since I first entered fan spaces (fandom). Overall the experiences I've had within a fandom have been extremely positive! However, there is a behavior I had to unlearn through trial and error, what the unwritten rules are of how to conduct myself.

Here are some tips if you're new to interacting with fanworks within fandom:

Fanfic/Fanart is a gift.

The writer/artist created something and it's being shared to the fandom. If you appreciate and enjoyed the gift, tell them! Joy is meant to be shared, and being in a fandom means we're all here to celebrate a shared story or experience!

Comments/reblogs/likes/etc are all ways to say "thank you" to the artist or writer that took the time and effort to create and share their joy.

Think of fandom like a massive, ongoing party. People are coming and going, having chats and discussions about the book, show, movie, etc. on and off. You can walk around saying hi and join in on these open conversations.

Occasionally, someone goes up on stage to announce they are going to post a new piece of fanart on the wall for everyone to look at if they want. Everyone interested can make their way over to where the art is displayed by the artist and check it out.

Someone else announced they just put a new fic on the fanfic shelf. Everyone is over there reading and chatting about what they enjoyed with the writer and each other.

Just like in a real life party, if someone came over to any one of these groups unasked to start telling everyone why they dislike whatever is being talked about, it isn't going to be received positively. Some people might agree with you and join in, but most will see a person committing a social faux pas.

How Do I Return the Gift?

The polite and expected etiquette when coming across a fandom fic or fanart that you're not feeling is to either keep scrolling, or hit the back button. Don't like, don't read has been an age old saying in fandom, for good reason.

If the fanart or fanfic isn't to your taste, move on! There's no need or reason to tell the writer/artist you didn't like what they created. Unless you are specifically asked for constructive criticism by the writer or artist, your input is not needed nor asked for. To reiterate the above, fan creations shared are a gift. Just like if you received a gift you didn't like or want, especially one made by the gifter, would you immediately tell them all the reasons you don't like it? List reasons why they should rework it to your taste? Write critical "reviews" posted to sites like Tumblr, Goodreads, TikTok, etc. where the writer or artist can see them?

Why? What is your goal to do this? If the artist/writer didn't ask to be criticized, then you're doing the equivalent of telling someone that just wrote you a story or drew picture for you all the reasons it's bad. Who are you to decide what is good and bad?

How Will They Know They're Wrong?

Fandom means we are all here to celebrate something we all enjoy. You kill the mood of the party when you do things like complain how another fan's art failed to meet your expectations.

Also, please remember the artists and writers are fellow fans. Real human beings that put their time, effort, and a part of themselves in their work. Art is subjective, but there's a time and place to criticize that person, and at the public fandom party in front of everyone is not it.

Instead, form friendship's with fellow fans that share your tastes and are like-minded, and complain to them directly. Step out of the party into the yard for privacy and form a group chat where you can post your honest reactions. Run through the emotional reaction you're processing after seeing something you strongly dislike.

Warning: Unchecked snark and negativity can quickly turn toxic. Venting is fine, we all have to do it, but if you find your group space is only complaining about other people's fan works, or complaining about the people themselves, then maybe it's time to take a break and go home for a bit. Maybe go check out some other parties, or share your own fic/fanart.

Tag Responsibly

Lastly, if you're going to ignore everything above and continue to intrude at the party with toxicity, don't be a jerk and tag the fandom. Or ship. Or the creator's name. If people wanted your criticism, it would be asked for. Don't hurt someone's feelings because you wanted your 5 minutes of Internet fame.

[enbycrip]

Obviously this is one of those paintings people have a lot of “OMG, they were comrades” snark about, but I actually love its tenderness unironically.

They are pale; the way white boys unused to being out of their clothing and this vulnerable with each other are, but there’s this innocence full of possibility to this.

Who are they going to be? Lovers? Fuckbuddies? Friends who are tender and vulnerable with each other?

I love to see portrayals of men and masc people with this kind of tenderness. I like the way you get to read yourself if the nudity is sexual or not, because it’s not exploitative. They are not positioned for the pleasure of the viewer, and you get to choose if they are going to be positioned for the pleasure of each other, or just for openness with each other.

It’s a thing I do actually quite love about some literature of this period; there *are* portrayals of tender masculinities like this out there. Tolkien is obviously the prime example most of us know about, but given I was that weird kid who devoured old books, I’ve come across more.

We are so used to only seeing masculinity portrayed as hard. And that hurts us all so much - men and people of marginalised genders, female and otherwise, alike.

For some reason I read this as very working class coded, and I genuinely don’t know why - obviously one of the great possibilities of nudity in art is the *removal* of class signifiers, so the viewer is *free* to read the portrayed in the way that makes sense to them. To me, this reads as two very young factory workers slipping away for a day together on the beach, with that guilty and delicious freedom you get when no one else knows where you are, with their dog.

I’m now looking to see if I can find paintings, or other artistic portrayals, of black young men with any similar tenderness and possibility.

I know they’ll very likely be a fuck of a lot later because this was painted right in the middle of the period when white society was incredibly invested in portraying black men and black masculinity as violent and bestial - not that we are out of that period now either, as every murder of a young black boy by police shows anew.

A painting showing this kind of tenderness, ambiguity and possibility in black young men or masc people would be incredibly radical because portrayals of black masculinity tend to be so *unceasingly* hard.

Please post if you have any, if you have the time and spoons. I am not an art historian and this isn’t my speciality so I would love to see what better-informed folk might show me.

[msweebyness]

MiracOlympus- Theatre Deities

Here’s the next batch of gods! The theater class! Enjoy! @artzychic27 @imsparky2002

Ayesha:

(Euphrosyne)

Goddess of joy and cheer

Can find a silver lining in any situation, negativity is a foreign concept

Personal cheerleader for any deity who needs it

Impossible not to smile around her

Great at talking people through their problems

Anthony:

(Thanatos)

God of death

Everything he says is morbid in some way, but he’s still a snark king

Only smiles around Jesse, otherwise he’s a dark cloud

Black Hair, black wings, black everything

SCARY when he’s mad

Jesse:

(Melpomene)

Muse of theater, specifically tragedy

Just as dramatic as his twin, Jean

Will start crying at the drop of a hat

Kind of a pessimist, worries a lot

Seeing him smile is a rare gift

Dot:

(Clio)

Muse of history and records

Keeps METICULOUS files of all happenings on Earth and Olympus

Can be a bit OCD about her records

Can recite an unbelievable amount of trivia

Can be persuaded to sing with her siblings

Petra:

(Iapetus)

Deity of Craft and artistic skill

Always working on some new project

Super critical of her own work

Loves visiting earth to find new materials

Can make anything into a fun art project

Roxie:

(Nemesis)

Godex of Retribution

Can be persuaded to forgive, but NEVER forgets

Believes very strongly in fairness and just punishment

Gives the most savage burns

Refuses to lose an argument

Candace:

(Eunomia)

Goddess of order and lawfulness

The Responsible One™️

Huge stickler for the rules of the divine order

Gets stressed when things go off course

Aggie, Alix and Ismael drive her up the wall

Brecken:

(Cybele)

God of wild creatures and nature

VERY protective of all wildlife

Sweet as a kitten with his friends and Evie

Doesn’t like being inside

Has some animal features, i.e. feline eyes, claws, etc.

Eri:

(Hecate)

Goddess of witchcraft and magic

Still gothic and theatrical as heck

Has a potion or spell for everything

Only likes to come out at night

Everyone is at least a little scared of her

Aggie:

(Atë)

Goddess of daring and impulse

Will NEVER turn down a dare

Harbinger of chaos

Giving the other gods heart attacks on the reg

Lacey’s parkour bestie

Margo:

(Eos)

Goddess of the dawn

Wakes up the world with encouragement and affection

Still a romantic, Rose’s matchmaking buddy

Biggest morning person ever

Dresses like the sunrise

Soo-Yeon:

(Eurus)

God of the east wind and fall weather

Quietest and most restrained of the winds

Still a nervous wreck, tbh

Tries to wrangle his fellow winds as best he can

Can be intense when it’s needed

Has wings like a falcon

Parker:

(Kratos)

Goddess of strength and fortitude

Can deadlift just about anything

Always up to fight for a good cause

Can be VERY stubborn

Best workout coach

Staci:

(Erebus)

Goddess of the ether and gloom

Emotions are impossible to read

Likes to hang out in the shadows

Still snarky like no other

Hangs in the Underworld most of the time

Evie:

(Erato)

Muse of song and lyric poetry

Voice so pure it will make you cry

Still very proper, but cuts loose when singing

Master of wrangling her siblings

Writes love songs for Brecken

Mona:

(Morpheus)

Deity of dreams

Half-awake 90% of the time

Things they say are confusing, but also profound

Cannot stop falling asleep

Keeps a dream journal for the whole world, great at interpretation

Eloise:

(Metis)

Goddess of prudence and deliberation

Consistent voice of reason on Olympus

Does complex math problems or puzzles to relax

Not the most versed in emotion, but a good listener

Always has at least three plans

Anais:

(Urania)

Muse of science and space

Spends hours locked in her lab, working on countless experiments

Never goes anywhere without their telescope

Infodumps about the periodic elements

Is very…intense when curious about something

Missy:

(Asclepius)

Goddess of health and medicine

Will punt any of her fellow deities if they’re not taking care of themselves

She cares, it’s just aggressively

Serves as Olympus’ doctor, nurse, physical therapist, nutritionist, etc.

Snarky, but it’s out of love

Leave your thoughts in the comments and reblogs!

[cboffshore]

Well, less than twelve hours after wondering if I should make it: it's here, the official playlist for On Sea, Sunlight, and Sky! Cover art and everything, too.

Since Spotify doesn't allow track-by-track notes to be added, I've included commentary on each included song under the cut (as well as their names and artists so anyone who's not on Spotify can go look them up). If you're short on time, the most important thing to know is that order is not important here, as this is a rough collection of songs that either inspired or act as parallels to the series. You know, for when you want the energy of the fics without actually reading them.

Before the notes: here's the full cover art. I sourced all the illustrations from free art websites and Google listings, then edited them together and did some minor color correction in Sketchbook (on mobile, too!). I tried to go for a scrapbook style look, so I hand-cut each piece out with a rough eraser for a papery feel, then added text that I formatted in Canva, pulled the background out of, and textured.

Now: the tracklist and commentary!

"Escape Route" by Paramore: Given Nya's MO of GTFO throughout the series, I thought this would be a nice capstone track. I especially love the lines "Not quite a victory to run from your problems/But it's the only plan that I got, the only plan that I got" and "Where I'm going is everyone's story" in a meta kind of way. Where she's going - or trying to - is indeed this entire story.

"The Ballad of Mona Lisa" by Panic! At The Disco: Three out of four entries in OSSAS take their name from "Kaleidoscope Eyes," a bonus track from the same album as this one that's not on streaming services (although you can find it on YouTube). In the absence of the title track, I picked "Mona Lisa" for its ethereal opener and ominous guitar work. I also adore the line "A lonely speaker in a conversation/Her words are swimming through his ears again" for the prologue of IICT(OSC).

"Small Cuts" by The Brobecks: This is where "It Doesn't Take Much (To Cover Up Small Cuts)" takes its name from. I think the themes of covering up pain while wanting someone to acknowledge it works very well for that particular fic, but also for the series as a whole. My favorite OSSAS-ish line in this one is "She will leave you deaf and bewildered/Oh, how she floats like a butterfly, stings like a killer."

"Visitation Of The Ghost" by The Brobecks: From the same album as "Small Cuts," this is a delightfully spooky track (and if you want extra drama, go look up the "fancy studio version"). The second verse is especially relevant for reasons I'll try to articulate in the finale of this year's installment, if all goes well, so pay attention to that one ;)

"GLOOMTOWN BRATS" by I DONT KNOW HOW BUT THEY FOUND ME: This track brings us three for three on Dallon Weekes songs, and there's more where that came from! A brand-new release, this song is a panicky, funky track that acts as a nod towards Nya's canon distrust towards overblown luxury and Nadakhan's veneer of gentlemanly behavior.

"Tell That Mick He Just Made My List of Things To Do Today" by Fall Out Boy: It's loud, it's fast, it's snarky, it's bitter - this is a song to run away to. Take a look at that chorus, the chunk with the bridges and the piss, and tell me otherwise. This might be a personal thing, but the swell of the volume between the verses and the choruses makes me think of swooping ocean waves.

"Playing God" by Paramore: At its core, OSSAS is a power struggle. This song exemplifies that with its own hefty dose of Nya-aligned snark and poignant venting. I especially like the pairing of the lines "Next time you point a finger, I might have to bend it back or break it off/Next time you point a finger, I'll point you to the mirror" as a character analysis of both Nya and Nadakhan (as a bonus, this line will become very relevant in the IICT(OSC) finale - and not for the reasons you think).

"Nearly Witches (Ever Since We Met...) by Panic! At The Disco: Another one from the album that kicked all this off, this is yet another spooky, dreamlike track, with an undercurrent of lost love and regret that serves Nadakhan especially well. (For him, I think it's fun to take the shouted "And I regret never letting you go!" out of the song's context for the IICT(OSC) opening sequence.)

"mirrorball" by Taylor Swift: Something a little softer and solidly out of the 2000s alt rock scene, this song works nicely for the introspective sections of the series, especially when it comes to how Nya processes her situation. For that, I really like the line "I'll show you every version of yourself tonight/I'll get you out on the floor" and the general quietness of the track.

"Look Who's Inside Again" by Bo Burnham: This one is pretty specific to IICT(OSC) and actually almost gave the fic its title! It ultimately didn't, but I think it's still a good fit. If I listed every line that fit the story, I'd be writing out the whole song, so do us both a favor and go play it once or twice.

"Hold Me Like A Grudge" by Fall Out Boy: Yet another snarky one that I particularly like for both Nya and as a tongue-in-cheek reference to Nadakhan's constant physical contact despite the fact that he's growing to resent her and his own failings (literally holding her like a grudge). Nya is nothing if not a "full-time problem". (Also: the bass line on this is incredible.)

"Carry On" by Coeur de Pirate: This song actually inspired the post-Seabound Nya fics I wrote a while back, so it's a Nya song to me now. In the context of the newest series installment, I love the line "The light of the sundowns/On my fate" as a little bit of foreshadowing.

"YES MOM" by Tessa Violet: This one is unadulterated independence, power posing, and self-confidence - that is, Nya every time she kicks off some new menace behavior. "Push me down and I bounce right back/Trampoline and it's in my past/Rising like a phoenix, making fire from the ash" is a FANTASTIC sequence for her, in both the context of her little successes in this series and her origin as Samurai X.

"The Carpal Tunnel Of Love" by Fall Out Boy: Surrealist Wentz lyricism at its best, I chose this one for the underlying themes of relationships that are apparently destined to never work (like the one Nya's trying to avoid) and the sheer energy. I especially like the Wentz screaming section in the middle, and the lyrics for that part are pretty relevant - although unintelligible, so you might want to just look them up and read them on your own.

"Say Amen (Saturday Night)" by Panic! At The Disco: The music video for this one inspired the combat sequence in IICT(OSC). Aside from that influence, I think the lyrics that swing from wild confidence to existential despair are a great fit for the tone of this series.

"bury a friend" by Billie Eilish: I love that this one opens with a series of questions that range from simply wondering what's wrong with someone to wondering about what happens after death. If that's not a fun fit for Nya's arc in this series (we'll get to the death thing eventually, don't worry), I don't know what is. Again, there's a nice sense of bitterness in here, as well as those ominous male backing vocals muttering "Careful" and echoing the lyrics here and there.

"Choke - Acoustic" by I DONT KNOW HOW BUT THEY FOUND ME: Both versions of this track are awesome, but I like the gentle, almost taunting creepiness of the acoustic style in this one. The entire song is about hating a place, which I think is appropriate given the fact that Nya's trapped with someone she hates for the first three fics on the timeline and with memories she hates for "Small Cuts." In IICT(OSC), she loosely considers burning the Temple down as a means of escape, but finds that she can't, which lines up beautifully with "If I could burn this town, I wouldn't hesitate/To smile while you suffocate and die." And, in true Weekes style, there's another little commentary against undeserved wealth that works nicely with Nya's disdain for her situation.

"Absinthe" by I DONT KNOW HOW BUT THEY FOUND ME: As of IICT(OSC), beverages are a major plot device, which plays nicely with 'Whatever they give you, stop drinking it down!" and the title of the track. If "Choke" is Nya's TLDR opinion of the situation, "Absinthe" is Nadakhan's - but we'll get to that in the finale.

"Modern Day Cain" by I DONT KNOW HOW BUT THEY FOUND ME: Last IDKHOW track for a while, I promise! And I hate that I keep saying the finale is going to make a lot of these make sense, but if it's true for one song, it's true for this one, which did inspire some of what I'm working on for the final confrontation.

"The Calendar" by Panic! At The Disco: This one is only here for the lines "There is simply nothing worse than knowing how it ends" and "Anticipation's on the other line, and obsession called while you were out" as very thematically-appropriate lines. Also, a straight bop.

"Patches of Sky" and "Path of the Eclipse" by Coeur de Pirate from Child of Light: A little instrumental break, these are two of the pieces I keep on my default writing playlist. Ominous and optimistic in equal measure, I think these two fit OSSAS well.

"Disloyal Order of Water Buffaloes" by Fall Out Boy: This one is an absolute goldmine of lines that could work for either of the series leads. For Nya, I really like the repeated "Boycott love! Detox just to retox!/And I'd promise you anything for another shot at life/Imperfect boys with their perfect ploys/Nobody wants to hear you sing about tragedy!" For Nadakhan, I like (well, not LIKE like, but I definitely think it works) the slightly stalkerish and somewhat paranoid "Little girl, you got me staring odd/Or was that just a telescopic camera nod?"

"Time To Dance" by Panic! At The Disco: This one is perfect in ways I can't articulate succinctly, although I do want to say I love the detached and kind of panicky sarcasm of the opener as a summary of the overall series mood: "Well, she's not bleeding on the ballroom floor just for the attention/'Cause that's just ridiculously odd/Well, she sure is gonna get it!" There's also some desperation in there that works very well for every failed escape attempt or revenge plot.

"Leave Me Alone - Piano Version" by I DONT KNOW HOW BUT THEY FOUND ME: Surprise, more IDKHOW! The lyrics on this one are pretty straightforward - read it as an insulting monologue being hurled at Nadakhan if you'd like. I chose this one for the lonely, vaguely-frightened vocals over the stripped-down piano backing.

"Boy Division" by My Chemical Romance: I like this one for its high energy and fight scene vibes, but most importantly, look at those lyrics - don't they read as someone lamenting a situation they put themselves into? I think that works well for what I've done and plan to do to Nadakhan in this year's installment and any future ones.

"To The End" and "It's Not a Fashion Statement, It's a Fucking Deathwish" by My Chemical Romance: Songs from Three Cheers for Sweet Revenge automatically get Skybound brownie points for all the gore and the wedding theme. "To The End" reads as a mockery of Nadakhan's marriage plot; "Deathwish" is a fun examination of resilience and, well, revenge - I adore the line "I'm taking back the life you stole/This hole you put me in wasn't deep enough, and I'm climbing out right now/You're running out of places to hide from me!" as a general summary of what Nya's doing the whole time.

"F.T.W.W.W." by My Chemical Romance: Again, excellent action sequence energy here; this is what flipping the bird would sound like if it made noise. In the context of Skybound and this series, I really appreciate the line "The heart you got, it ain't the one you need."

"Karma" by Taylor Swift: Listen, this entire series is an excuse to flip the script on Nadakhan and let Nya take a crack at the whole "read your enemies and then use their flaws to beat them to an emotional pulp" tactic, because frankly that's a cool narrative device. Here's where "Karma" works best: remember the line in "Wishmasters" where Nya, with little other comment, tells Nadakhan that he'll be sorry? That's this song. There's a sort of "I know you're about to get your ass beat" energy, a sort of wink wink from the singer that subtly pokes the subject with the knowledge that only one person here is in the right.

[robo-dino-puppy]

10 Fandoms, 10 Characters, 10 Tags

thank you for the tag @bluntblade! (i'm embarrassed this took me so long. also i've never been good at ranking things so uh don't consider this list in order of most favorite or anything)

Donna Noble (Doctor Who)

Character I think about if I'm having a bad day <3 This scene between the windows in Partners in Crime never fails to cheer me up. Also: "You're not mating with me, sunshine!" Theeeeee best platonic relationship with the Doctor IMO.

Varl (Horizon)

Aloy did not appreciate this good dude nearly enough. I want Varl to be my BFF. T_T But HFW happened and... I won't say too much about that or we'd be here all day. He's alive in my head and that's all that matters.

Cimorene (The Enchanted Forest Chronicles)

Cimorene! She's no-nonsense and clever. She wasn't a fan of being treated like a princess so she went and "got captured by" a dragon so people would stop bothering her, and helps her cook and organize her library. I mean, goals.

Loki (MCU)

I wasn't into the MCU when it started getting big, and in fact I didn't see any of the movies until I read someone on Tumblr (c. 2012) going on about (paraphrased) how awful it was that people liked Loki because he was the absolute worst and if you liked him you were a gross immoral person and you should feel bad. So I went and watched this Avengers movie everyone was talking about. And guess what haters? He is terrible and I love him.

Parker (Leverage)

Although I am not brave enough to throw myself off buildings, sometimes I amuse myself by thinking "what would Parker do?" and since a canonical option involves stabbing someone who's bothering her with a fork and jumping out a window, the thought cheers me up even if I can't do that.

Aziraphale (Good Omens)

He just wants people (aside from Crowley) to leave him alone in his bookshop. He never fits in with his "side" but tries to do what they want anyway, because that's the good thing to do, and he wants to be good. I can relate so hard, buddy.

Milo Thatch (Atlantis: The Lost Empire)

Ok so... I totally had a crush on Michael J. Fox and I was already interested in linguistics back when this movie came out, and then here's a main character voiced by him who was a linguist! Milo had to be my favorite :D

Elena Fisher (Uncharted)

I will fully admit that some of my initial love of Elena came from her AI covering my panic-flailing self early on in the first Uncharted game (I'm THE WORST at games with guns, even on easy, it's actually embarrassing) - but she impressed me right away when she was not overly impressed by Nate. And her snark game is on point.

Zeb (Star Wars Rebels)

I feel like Zeb needs more love. Comic relief character who actually has an unbelievably tragic backstory! And his story has so much untapped potential! We never really get to explore what happened with Lasan, and then then dump Kallus in there with his defection to the Rebellion and his whole *handwaves* history with the Lasats and eventual apparent (b)romance with Zeb - and the show had so little to say about it! Huge angsty storytelling miss right there. (Dave why.)

Brian Finch (Limitless [2015])

This dude! Lovable but he would be SO exasperating to deal with IRL. His arts-and-craftiness just resonated with me. He was always making stuff out of toothpicks and yarn and papier mâché and clay and and and- I'm still mad this show only got one season.

zero-pressure tags: @mari-mary, @ayaitch, @hannahmationstudios, @inomakani, @fogsblue, @nerd-artist, @singingkestrel, @prototypelq, @tjerra14, @artekai or just consider yourself tagged if you want to do it!

[therosebunpost]

Fruity Domino Belt

Steve isn’t very artistic, but maybe that didn’t matter.

CW: An absolutely heinous pizza combo, and Steve being self deprecating about his art skills. Reader is often referred to with Fem pronouns and is called Bunny as a nickname. Her style is very distinctive, but other then that, she is written as inclusive as possible!

————

The next Saturday, Steve is over at the Munson trailer. A six pack in one hand, and a notepad in the other. It took him a while to come up with something he could make, something useful, but then he remembered your notepads. He's been able to communicate verbally just fine, but with his hearing going down the drain by the year and his migraines making it hard to think, let alone talk, he figured he might as well.

You open Eddie's door with a flourish. Your eyes were big, and shiny while pulling him inside where Eddie was already stretched out in the living room. He's got a tiny figurine in one hand and the world's smallest paint brush in the other.

"Geeze, Munson. Careful or else you'll start wearing glasses like me." Steve snarks to avoid focusing too much on the furrowed brow of concentration on Eddie's face. The delicate way he paints the tiny shield of the figurine. Something Steve hadn't thought Eddie could do.

"Look who finally showed up, and with beer! You're worming right into my heart here, Harrington." Eddie jokes, reaching over to grab a can before taking a guzzling sip. You have Steve sit in the middle of you and Eddie, so he's boxed in, not that he minds all that much. Sure, the floor wasn't all that comfortable, but he was too distracted by the two of you to care.

You have your project spread out before you. You had paint at the ready, the beads and dominos carefully laid out as well. There’s some wire and some other tools that he didn’t know the name of.

“So…your making a..?” Steve trails off, knowing that Eddie told him but forgetting all the while. Even before everything, he had a hard time remembering things, but now a days he found himself forgetting more then usual.

You didn’t seem to mind, though. ‘A fruit belt! Its based off my favorite fruits.’ He admired the doodle you made. “It’s cute.” He admits, wondering if he’ll ever see you wearing it. “Though…how are you gonna get it to go through the loops of your pants..?” He asked, eyeing the tiny metal eyelets dubiously.

Shaking your head, you flip to the next page. He watches the way the little puffball on your pen sways with the vigor of your writing. You probably had great essays, he thinks.

‘I have a lot of baggy shirts, and I thought this would cinch them in a bit. Plus, the idea is just cool!’

He nods, not really having any reason to disagree even if it wasn’t how he normally wore a belt. Though, fashion in general didn’t really make much sense to him. Most of his fashion advice just came from what his parents wanted, or what girls said he looked nice in.

A tap on the shoulder startles Steve. The former jock whirling around to look at Eddie, who jumps as well. “Shit! Hey, I just…did you hear me? Just now?” He asked, brows lifting as Steve stares at him blankly.

“I just…what did you bring to work on?” Eddie pointed out Steve’s little pad of paper. Steve hesitated, lightly drumming his fingers on the cardboard cover.

"...I..thought I could…color this. And stuff." He taps at the book. "I've been um, forgetting things a lot. Having a hard time…hearing." It felt weird to admit this to the couple, but then again, he might as well be truthful.

You perked up, scooping up your book and making a vague gesture towards his. You were smiling, and Steve's face was burning as you put two and two together.

"Yeah, it seemed to be really helping you, so…" He shrugged and Eddie's lips turned up into a slow smile. "Cool. What are you gonna paint on it?"

Steve paused, now faced uncertainty. "I…didn't get that far. This stuff isn't really my…wheelhouse?" He gazed at the cover, his artistic career over before it even began. Though it seems you weren't ready for that yet.

'well, what do you like?' You ask, turning towards him with raised eyebrows. 'that's what inspires me, along with my outfits or an accessory.'

Steve bites the inside of his cheek. He knew the answer, but was mindful of the company he was keeping right now. Eddie, 'throwing balls into laundry baskets' Munson was right next to him. But Eddie was eyeing him curiously, and you looked so eager to hear the answer…

“Maybe…some baseball, or basketball?” Steve admitted, ignoring the faint fizzle of disappointment when Eddie scoffed. You leaned over, shoving Eddie on the shoulder, much to the metalhead’s protest. You gave your boyfriend a glare, hands on your hips.

“Fine, fine, christ. What were you thinking exactly? Like, a hoop? Or a bunch of balls?” Eddie asked, gesturing with his hand while trying his best to not roll his eyes again. Steve shrugged, tapping at the cover. “Was thinking about a bat actually. Or maybe something water related?”

‘I think either of those sound really cool. I have stencils in case you wanna add one of the balls to it?’ You hand over the floppy plastic, and Steve chalked it up to the light but he was sure your cheeks tinged pink when your hands brushed his. You also handed him rulers, pens, and paint.

Vaguely he remembers going over colors in art class. Red and blue make purple, red and yellow make orange, blue and yellow make green. He looks at the paint in both your pallets, the colors swirled and mixed into a rainbow of shades and hues. He starts with blue first. His glob of paint was a bit too big, and it only got worse when he tried adding white to make it lighter.

Shifting to look between you two, his puddle of blue doesn’t seem to phase either of you, so he just starts painting. He loads his brush with tons of paint, slathering the front of his notebook with it until the entire thing was covered and oh no, why was it bending, shit, yours didn’t bend like this-

“Uh, you want me to grab a hair dryer? That’s gonna take years to dry otherwise.” Eddie cuts in, eyeing the globs of blue on the paint. The paint wasn’t even fully mixed, so streaks of white marbled the over saturated cardboard. It was kind of pretty, but not what Steve had planned. “Uh, sure, yeah. Thanks.”

Shifting in his spot, Steve stared at the mess with a sinking feeling. Honestly, he knew it probably wasn’t going to look great. Art really wasn’t his thing. He liked it, but he didn’t usually stare at a painting and feel some sort of desire to do the same thing. Usually it was just him trying to find the ‘meaning’ that Robin told him about. What meaning was there to find in a bowl of fruit other than pretty colors? The guy was probably hungry when painting it, maybe?

He felt a tap to his shoulder, his head shifting over to look at you. At the paintbrush in your hands. Your notebook is laid there, the length of your previous conversation with him growing and growing.

‘Paint goes a long way! Though trust me, I’ve also had that happen a ton of times. While you wait for it to dry, do you wanna paint some dominos with me? I have the paint mixed already. :)’

“Oh, yeah.”

Picking up the brush once again, Steve eyed the way you scooped up the paint. A much smaller blob then his previous one, and smoothed it over the ivory plastic. He follows your lead, frowning slightly as it doesnt come out as smooth as yours. Little bumps and lines of paint that looked similar to his old elementary projects. Still, it was kind of nice. Watching the color cover the once blank canvas. “How do you get yours so smooth?” He muttered, looking between your pieces.

You reach for your pad, pause at the paint on your fingers, before shaking your head and turning towards him fully. Gesturing with your hand for him to watch how you do it. He turns, shifting a bit as his knee bumps into yours. You grab another domino, your paintbrush dipping and grabbing a frankly minuscule amount of paint in his opinion. You slide the brush across the domino, and it makes those same bumpy ridges that were annoying him before. You smooth it out with your brush, laying it out with the others before grabbing yet another domino.

This time you scrape the sides of the brush, and the paint glides on smoothly this time, like it was dyed instead of painted. You smile and show him again, and again until you encourage him to pick up his brush and try it out. Honestly, he could understand the appeal once he managed to get that smooth stroke down. Kind of like when he really perfected his baseball swing to get that strong, nearly effortless looking glide.

You reacted a lot nicer than his coaches, though. Beaming at him, and nodding in praise as he kept painting. It wasn’t perfect and there were moments where the paint still beaded up or looked patchy, but you were proud of him. That counted for something. You didn’t remark on how he should have picked it up faster, or how this was easy shit and everybody else could have done it. Didn’t say he was stupid, or dumb. It was nice, really nice. Still, it’s not long before he remembers you’re going to be wearing this, whatever it came to be.

“Hey, if you uh…need to re-do any of mine, it’s fine, Y’know? I get it.” He murmurs after a few dominos. “They’re kinda patchy. Don’t look as good as yours.” And after all, it really was fine. He couldn’t blame you for it. You were probably just trying to give him something to do after he basically fucked up his notepad. There was no way that was going to dry with that much paint on it, he realizes that now. Now he was going to have to go home with it, probably ruined.

There was a moment where you looked between the two growing piles before shaking your head. ‘They look good, Steve. Once they dry, do you want to help me put on a second coat? I need to do the same for mine. Usually these need a few coats before they really look good.’

He glances at your work, and doesn’t really see what you mean, but hey, he kind of liked this painting thing. Might as well keep it going, even if he sucked. “Sure.”

Eddie finally came back with the dryer in hand. It’s an old, clunky thing that rattles when the metalhead moves. The plastic coating that protects the wire is worn in a few spots, but it roars to life when Eddie plugs it in. “Let’s leave it in the kitchen, yeah?” He offers, scooping up the gloopy book carefully. “While m’ in here, you hungry?? Could order pizza? What’ya say baby?” He calls, turning the dryer on before popping his head out to look at you.

Steve ignores the faint heat on his face at the thought of Eddie talking to him, like that. To the both of you really. Being his baby, your baby.

“Hey, Steve?”

Blinking, Steve snapped his head up. You both were staring at him, expectantly. He blinks again and Eddie makes a snorting noise. “Are you hungry, man? What do you like on your pizza?”

“Oh! Uh, anything. Whatever you guys want, don’t really care.”

"Anchovies with pineapple and mustard it is!"

Steve retched before he could stop himself. "What?"

"What, you said whatever we wanted? Felt like getting our special, right baby?" He grins over at you, and despite your wrinkling nose you nod with a smile. Though Steve rolled his eyes.

"There is no fucking way you actually eat that." Steve deadpanned, stabbing towards him with the end of his paint brush. "Hell, ten bucks says you'll both puke."

"You're on!"

You sit up in your seat, suddenly a lot less amused. You hold your finger up to Steve, indicating you needed a minute before hurrying after your boyfriend. Steve can't help the smile crossing his lips as he hears Eddie laughing and apologizing in the kitchen. Not even trying to hide it.

"I was just calling his bluff Bun, I'll eat it, okay?"

Eddie's voice dipped softer to where Steve couldn't hear him anymore. He hesitated before slowly leaning over to peer at the couple.

Eddie has his hands cupped over your cheeks, thumbs brushing the soft skin. He has such a soft smile, and his eyes are like liquid chocolate when it comes to looking at you. You're brushing his hair away from his face, caressing his temple, adorable pout still on your face even with the tender gesture.

God, Steve didn't know who he wanted to be more at that moment. Get to feel your sweet touch, or to feel Eddie's? Or maybe he could get both, be boxed in between you two again.

Steve startles when Eddie catches his eye. There's a glint in his and Steve leans back with a panicked grunt. Oh fuck, he hadn't gotten caught as of yet, and he wasn't sure what would happen if they did. Could he handle it?

"Alright, pizza's ordered Steve!" Eddie called from the kitchen, leaving the jock to let out a sigh.

-

Three pizza's ended up coming to the munson trailer. The anchovy and pineapple was at the top, looking just as gross. Eddie made a point to squeeze the mustard upon it artfully, a gleeful grin on his lips upon seeing Steve's mouth turn down in displeasure.

"Don't worry, we got some others too, in case you truly don't want this masterpiece." Eddie teases, nodding towards the boxes. You were already digging into one of the boxes, a gleeful smile on your face. Steve settles on the third box, pepperoni and cheese.

"Okay, I'm changing the bet, twenty five bucks says you won't make it through the first slice." Steve shoots back, narrowing his eyes.

"Seventy five, and I'll eat half in one sitting."

"A hundred if you eat that whole thing."

Eddie's eyes widened for a moment before he let out a small scoff before offering a hand. "Deal, hope you got that sweet dough in the pocket of those tight jeans of yours."

Feeling heat crawling up his neck, Steve reaches out and clasps Eddie's hand. "Don't worry about that, man. Just focus on that shit you call pizza."

The doorbell rings a second time, and Robin steps in with a rush of apologies. “I’m so sorry, I got side tracked, and I didn’t know what to bring- Oh my god what is that-“

While you’re explaining to Robin the unfortunate bet, Steve offers a wave before going back to painting. Slowly dragging the color across until it was smoothly covered. He watched the way Eddie gobbled at his pizza, suppressing his laugh the entire time.

Robin soon plopped down across from him, and maybe you were just as opportunistic as Eddie, because you also eagerly suggested she help paint the dominos. “Sure! Though, it probably won’t end up good. Whenever I paint, I either use too much paint or too little and it looks patchy..”

“I can help, here.”

Steve wasn’t sure why he offered, but soon ended up showing her the technique you had. Robin caught on pretty quick, which he expected, and soon it was a small circle of painting.

“Didn’t know you painted, Dingus.” Robin comments with a smile, gently nudging him and Steve shrugs. “Not really, had a good teacher.” He turns to look over at you, and he adores the bashful look on your face. He could absolutely get used to seeing it more often.

——-

-

Taglist: @ali-r3n (DM if you wanna be added!)

[aeolianblues]

Realising. I have (/had) a lot of sympathy for NME, since they played a big part in shaping musical and pop culture, and crucially, I started reading NME in 2013. The things artists said about them being two-faced shits did not really resonate with my experience of reading the NME. I'd spent a decent amount of time over the years, watching people like Andrew Trendall do good, in-depth and considered interviews with artists, often video ones that are less easy to manipulate if you will, that actually treated musicians like complex, thinking, feeling human being trying to express themselves through art, and writers like Rhian Daly who wrote a lot of the news stuff pretty factually— none of the snark that accompanied every news story of the past. I was fairly sympathetic to their cries of no one supporting journalism anymore, and I was saddened by them going out of print in 2018, and I agree it's a hellish landscape for journalism in general; worse for a non-news, leisure magazine like a music mag. I was happy that they were coming back in any form at all, with those bi-monthly (every 2 months) magazine drops.

I realise now (after the Fontaines incident, which I thought was in extremely poor taste after they'd spent the week before that posting clips of Andrew's 30-minute interview recorded at Grian's house) that had I been reading NME even 5 years before I started, I might certainly have been in the chorus of people celebrating the publication's woes. They were fucking horrible. Particularly from the late 00s onwards, they just got more and more tabloid. They ragged on new bands repeatedly. If you looked a certain way, if you had certain sentimentality, they would eat you alive, even as any other infrastructure in place to give you a boost slowly fell apart.

I realise now that they were on the back foot. They were playing niceys because they knew that they got way more publicity out of doing a collaborative Instagram post with pink pantheress than she got out of it. They went down the tiktok artist discovery route, they branched into covering K-pop (notably, not in NME Asia, as they did with indie bands from Asia, but in the UK/global NME). All just finding the artists with the largest audience they could woo or at least expose their website advertisers to. BTS don't need the NME, their fans don't even read it. They are too busy compiling 'x weeks since BTS has been in the Spotify charts; stream BTS, army!!' charts on twitter. All BTS gets out of this is saying they've fulfilled UK/English language press obligations, and maybe hopefully exposed themselves to someone over age 35.

Then the Oasis reunion happened. 35 articles a day. And the minute they found an opening to rag out a new band, throw them to the dogs (Oasis fans over the age of 45), they did. Stirred up this shitstorm—the Fontaines 'controversy' is that their guitarist and bassist aren't Oasis fans. That's 'controversy'. That is the stupidest thing i've heard. They're allowed that opinion. To turn it into a focal point story also is to imply that this is a point we should take note of and cross-examine. I think they did Fontaines so fucking dirty, and it reminded me of why people were wary of these magazines in the first place. They wait until they have the moment and momentum to sell you out, and they do at the first chance. So distasteful.

So yeah, this felt like old-school NME bullshit. No wonder most millennials don't feel too kindly about them. Gen Z readers caught them at a low ebb.

I'm not saying burn them all down! I'm saying this culture and attitude still very much exists in journalism, dormant as it stays right now. Look at the tabloids.

[springtrappd]

@limbsandheads this entire blog has actually been an elaborate operation to convert as many people to vannyism as possible via the "shite posts" of the youth. Glad to see it's working

jokes aside: HEHEHEHE THANK YOU... yeah a big part of getting comfy in my niche here has been getting comfortable enough to actually, like, POST my anaylsis /because/ of the complete lack of it elsewhere. being counterculture can be a tough place to be in! the amount of times i've had to hold myself back or scrap something bc i'm unsure if i'm gonna get dragged into explaining, idk, what a fucking metaphor is or some shit... ugh. awful do not recommend. i'm not sure what's worse: people who refuse to believe that parallels exist, or people that understand that parallels exist but only as fodder for theories (which are, as we all know, the most important part of any satisfying story)

i think people in general have a hostile response to any kind of serious analysis precisely because it's serious; it feels like... there's this pervasive sense -- particularly when you talk to the people that i'm thinking of here -- that academia is somehow Other or (views itself as) Superior in some way, thus making the act of engaging in it about posturing rather than, well. study. people have a very strict idea of what art is, even if only subconsciously, and react accordingly when the Other comes in to try and take away their favourite toy. games are fun; analysis is not. why can't you just let people enjoy things, you're just doing this for attention, etc etc etc. it's a position borne of ignorance, one that assumes that you can separate art from play at all -- and one that finds itself most vulnerable to exploitation. it's fundamentally reactionary rhetoric, is what i'm getting at here, and why i can so easily swap out stupid fnaf jargon for a conservative strawman and still get the point across.

anti-intellectualism sucks because it sucks all the joy out of art. like, for all i joke about being fuelled by spite, you'll find that even my most virulent snark comes from a place of love. i talk about this shit because i love it; because i love the actors and writers and art directors and character designers and production teams and editors, every single one of them, and there's nothing quite as intimate as a dissection. to peel back the layers of a piece of art is to ultimately shine a light on the things beneath -- all the blood and bone and gristle, where the artist has been pressed between the pages... to look at someone and know them, to sit and think about what they wanted to say -- what is that, if not love?

you aren't born knowing how to say "i love you". it's something you've gotta learn. and this is what we in the biz call a """METAPHOR""",

also, while we're here: fun fact! i actually write a lot of my stuff off-the-cuff, which is why the flow is often weird/words are missing/it might take a wild left turn away from the original subject? (like i'm low-key doing rn!) it's something that makes me cringe, but also fuels my desire to get around to writing a proper essay abt this terrible franchise eventually... i've got pages of bullet points & notes scattered around the place (& hundreds of discord messages to pull from, oh god), it's just the practical part of it that makes me want to crawl back into my skin. until then you are stuck with the Crazed Ravings (Autism Flavour), (un)fortunately (depending on how you look at it)

[miatsai]

I want to be an editor someday! What are the most important qualities or skills you think an editor can have? Both from an editor perspective and an author perspective?

Hi Anon!

This is a great question that has lots of answers because it really depends on the kind of editing you do and what the expectations are. But in general, I think that having an understanding of authorial intent and voice is super important. Authors make choices in their art, and any editor who believes rules supersede those artistic choices in every situation possible is not taking into account that writing is art.

There are copyeditors (or copy editors, I know some of you like seeing this term open) who hew strictly to their style guide of choice, the dictionary (Merriam-Webster Collegiate is the gold standard in trade publishing), and/or the house style guide, even when the author demonstrates a clear preference for something that's contra the guides or the dictionary. Sometimes it's for a very good reason. For example, I know that "accouterment" is the American spelling and therefore the "correct" spelling in the US, but you can pry "accoutrement" from my bare hands only after I am dead. Sometimes the author simply does not know about the rule, and that's where your discretion comes in when writing a global query.

Hand in hand with understanding authorial intent and voice is the ability to query without being harsh. No one likes having a mean editor. It's tempting to snark or fuss at an author, especially when passages are egregious, but a gentle correction with the right tone of voice works much, much better than a comment that will result in your author thinking you hate them. Being a mean editor (I'm sorry, "brutally honest" if you're a man) is not a badge of honor. I'll say that again: Being a mean editor is not a badge of honor. Editors are there to help clarify and shape a document, all under the aegis of the author's vision. They are not there to cackle maniacally and go on power trips. It's a skill to write queries and letters with gentle but direct language and provide examples where they are needed, and it's something that's only developed over time.

What do I mean by gentle but direct language? Well, that's hard to define as well; authors take feedback in so many different ways, so what may seem gentle to you may not feel gentle to the author. As an author, I have received edit letters that made me spiral for two months. My editor was not mean. She was complimentary. It's just that she asked a lot of questions and I needed to break my manuscript apart to address them in the scope I think they needed to be addressed in, and then I ran into a block, and thus, a spiral ensued. And that's for a letter that was short and kind! Her language was great, though.

Overall, I think that language such as "Echo here intentional?" or "AU: I noticed that this chapter and the previous seem to be out of sync with the rest of the timeline. OK, or should that be changed?" and comments in that tenor are professional and will not be met with accusations of being mean. This goes for developmental edit letters too; you have to find the tone that suits you as an editor as you deliver news that amounts to "scrap the following and rebuild," which no one wants to hear even when we say we want to hear it! No, we want to have written it perfectly on the first try.

And lastly--this one may feel the most controversial, but it isn't if you're an editor, and is if you aren't--when you're on a job, take your sentimentality out of your editing. You'll definitely find manuscripts or papers or whatever you're editing that you're a fan of, and when that happens, it's really wonderful. The jobs go by so much quicker when you're enjoying the material. But you still have to be able to look at a work as objectively as you can and analyze it without regard to your personal feelings. People have asked me how I feel about things I've edited when I was editing them, and the real truth is, aside from a few manuscripts I really adored (but still took the magnifying glass to), I don't have particular attachments to them. I don't have opinions on them. It's work, and it's a sign of respect for your profession and your author that you give them your best, regardless of your feelings for the manuscript.

I know, I know, it sounds cruel. But it's also one of those things where you don't want to be overly harsh to an author because you really, really don't like the way they write, or miss things because you were so caught up in the book that you just could not stop reading it. In those cases, when you send the manuscript back to the author, you can include a little note about how much you loved it, how much you're looking forward to seeing it on the shelf or on your device, etc. There are exceptions, of course, and I try to sniff those out before I accept manuscripts so that I don't read something that hits all my triggers. And that's the last-last piece of advice I'll give on becoming a good editor. Learn what your boundaries are and how to say no. Sometimes, it feels like you can't say no because you need the cash or you want desperately to get word of mouth out, but editing is taxing on the mind and body and the only one who suffers the consequences of that work is you.

Hope that answered your question!