#72% sugar and its barely that sweet

[lycorid]

This can of milk tea is disappointing.

[lumosinlove]

Vaincre

part v

~

cw: homophobic encounter.

~

November

November shadows, 

shade November change

November spells sweet memory, 

the season blue remains

~

“Lo!” Finn called. “Guess who just got traded to the Rags.”

Cool dread spun its way into Logan’s chest at full force. He felt the point of one of his hips knock against the counter. “Quoi?”

“Marshy and Morgs!” Finn said, and the appeared around the corner into the kitchen, red hair a mess. “Like, together. Like us.”

“These were Harvard teammates, yeah?” Leo asked, spooning sugar into Logan’s coffee.

“Like us?” Logan said. “They’re dating?”

“Oh, no,” Finn laughed. “I just meant together, like, at the same time. Around the same time, I guess I should say.”

“Wow,” Logan nodded, which prompted Finn to imitate the way he said wow, drawing out the W’s. Logan smiled, lifting his cup to his mouth. “We could visit them over the next free weekend maybe.”

“Damn, that’d be a blast to the past.”

“What are they like?” Leo asked, leaning into Logan’s side.

“You’d love Will. Will Morgan, Morgs,” Logan said. “Really level-headed, probably the nicest person I know. Marshy…”

“Percy Marshall is one crazy motherfucker,” Finn said, and poured his own cup of coffee, black.

Logan leaned into mock-whisper to Leo. “And Finn gets insane when they’re together.”

Finn shot him a look, but continued. “Best way to say it. He’ll party until the sun, he’s crazy superstitious—worse than Cap and Loops combined—and he’s also,” Finn slid onto a stool. “One of the hardest working guys you’ll ever met. Probably the hardest working.” Finn’s smile was one Logan’s favorite one, made even more so by the fact that he got to see it directed at Leo. “Until I met you, that is, Nut.”

Leo let out a pleased laugh and let Logan brush a hand through his hair. “Well, they’re in our division now. I’ll get to meet them.”

“Oh, man, we’re in for a fucking treat when we play New York next,” Finn grinned. “Gonna hit the town hard.”

Leo snorted. “You guys might.”

“Don’t worry about it,” Finn pressed a kiss to Leo’s cheek. “I know everyone we need to know.”

“And I can finally tell you,” Logan began. “That the first time you dragged me around New York knowing ever person you saw, I loved you.”

Finn blushed a little and let Leo pull him to settle in the V of his legs from where he was leaning back against the counter. “Well, it’ll be nice to see them.”

Logan nodded, but part of his chest pulled. He cleared his throat. “Ouais. Also…”

When he paused, Leo tapped their socked toes together encouragingly.

Logan shrugged and looked down into his coffee. He thought of Finn’s quick breaths when they took the Cup back to Harvard. He thought of kissing him in their old room. He thought of everything before. Percy and Will were a part of all of that. Not directly, maybe, but Logan knew what seeing them again would do.

“Memories,” Finn said, and Leo nudged him.

“Don’t say it for him.”

“Oh, right, sorry.”

“Memories,” Logan agreed. “Good and bad.”

~

Remus missed the net three times in fifteen minutes, and only barely managed to keep himself from breaking his stick against the boards. He would be embarrassed afterwards if he had, but could it really be so much worse than the way that he felt now?

He accepted Thomas’ fist bump as he passed him going into the locker room and sat down heavily in his stall. The game had been close, but the Devils had won out in the end. He glanced at some of the assistant coaches, who were murmuring together. There was no guarantee it was about him, but it still felt as thought it was. Sirius was talking with Evgeni, Evgeni’s loud laugh warming up the room. Remus stripped out of his sweaty uniform quickly and was headed for the showers with a towel around his waist when someone slapped him on the back.

“It’s decided,” Logan’s accent came from beside him. He wasn’t bothering with his towel, which was slung over his bare shoulder. The fleur-de-lis tattoo on his hip—and everything else—was on full display. “Me and Talker are taking you out tonight.”

Remus raised an eyebrow. “What does that mean exactly?”

Logan just smiled. “No boyfriends. No hockey. We have a day off tomorrow, so no pressure. Just some drinks.”

“And some pool, maybe,” Thomas said, coming up to Remus’ other side. “What do you say, Loops? Fun, eh?”

“Okay, one of you is butt-naked right now and the other is in a three-piece suit. I’m going to say yes and shower, all right?”

Thomas gave a whoop, and Remus couldn’t help the smile that crossed his face as he dropped his towel in the change room and turned on the hot water. He felt like a sling-shot lately, being catapulted one way, and then in the opposite direction. He guessed he should feel thankful that his friends could pick him up like that, and he did, but another part of him caved in beneath the sheer affection.

I’m letting you down.

He scrubbed his hands through his hair, and looked over his shoulder when he felt a gentle, quick kiss against the back of his neck.

“Bonsoir,” Sirius said with a soft smile, and went to the shower head beside him.

“Hi,” Remus smiled back. “Beautiful goal tonight.”

He watched the water lace over Sirius’ tan skin, darkening his hair further as he pushed it back, away from his face. “You’re beautiful.”

“Hey, Olli,” Finn called across the showers, making Olli look over at him. “You’re fucking beautiful, man.”

Olli just squeezed shampoo into his palm. “I know that, Harzy.”

Sirius’ laugh echoed through the showers, joined by others, and Remus let it warm around him like the steam.

“Apparently Tremz and Talkie are taking me out tonight,” he said to Sirius as they walked back into the locker room.

“Tremz,” Sirius called over to him. “Ouch.”

“Pas de capitaines,” Logan waved him off and went back to looking at whatever Leo was showing him on his phone. Sirius laughed and looked back to Remus.

“Sounds perfect,” he said. “Wake me up when you come in if I’m asleep.”

“And go to bed without a kiss?” Remus glanced down at the towel slung low across Sirius’ hips, then back up to his bright silver eyes. “I’d never.”

Sirius smiled and kissed him, but Remus felt the unspoken settling between them. Sirius had stopped bringing up wanting to help with Remus’ shortcomings on the ice. Remus knew he had brought that upon himself with refusals after refusals to talk about it, but now it felt more like a thing. An object. An ugly vase in the corner of the room.

Maybe he really did need to go out tonight.

Thomas settled in his stall beside Remus. “We’re gonna go to Red’s, yeah?”

Remus nodded as he pulled his gray t-shirt over his head. He held up his dark jeans. “I can wear this, right?”

“Fuck yeah, I’m not wearing this thing,” Thomas picked at the lapel of his suit. “Noelle already screen shotted the snapchat I sent her. Why keep it on now?”

Remus just laughed. “All right, Talkie. Lead the way.”

Red’s bar was shoved up against the side of a larger block of buildings in Gryffindor. Remus glanced up, one or two stars were poking through the increasingly cooling loud cover. Inside it was warm, though. Foggy in the way some rooms get when there are lots of happy people in them. Logan had chosen a long-sleeved, dark gray cotton shirt, so thin that Remus could see each ridge of his defined muscles and his necklace, too.

“What the fuck happens when that thing gets wet?” Remus snorted, plucking at it as they waited for their drinks at the bar.

“I’ll pretend we had a fight,” Thomas said. “Throw a drink on you, find out.”

Logan just eyed them suspiciously as they leaned against the bar. “You guys are strange.”

Thomas just flagged the bartender, stretching the white material of his thin knit sweater. He ordered a whiskey, Logan a rum and coke, and Remus opted for a lighter gin and tonic. They still had a game on barely 72 hours. Not that anyone was that much of a light weight, but he didn’t want any assumptions being made, any photographs taken that could put him in a worse light than he already was.

“I know what this is, you know,” he said after Logan and Thomas’ intense COD debate had gone on too long. They both looked over at him, the picture of innocence. Remus rolled his eyes. “I’m fine.”

“Media’s a bitch,” Thomas said. “That’s all this is. Hockey’s hard. You can’t help that you live with Cap, who makes it all look like a piece of cake.”

Logan laughed. “I think Cap would disagree. He stinks after games, mon dieu.”

Remus and Thomas shared a look. “And you don’t?”

“Finn likes it,” Logan smirked. “Gets him going.”

“Are you sure its the stench and not the muscles?” Thomas raised an eyebrow.

Logan waved him off. “I’m not talking about this with you two. We’re here for Loops.”

Remus groaned. “Guys…it’s not…I mean every player goes through this, right?”

They both nodded.

“Sure,” Thomas said. “But it doesn’t help that some people—“

“Assholes,” Logan amended.

“Right. It doesn’t help that some assholes don’t think you deserve to be here.”

Remus tilted his glass towards him. “Yeah.”

“We just think…” Logan began uncertainly, tongue poking out to wet his full bottom lip. “Look, I love Cap. He’s like a brother. But he’s intense. For him…sometimes hockey solves hockey.”

Remus wavered. “Yes and no.”

“We just thought you might want some other ears,” Thomas offered a smile. “I mean we can’t offer a feel good night of lovin’ to make you feel better…”

Remus snorted. “Right. You know, Talkie, that’s exactly what Sirius calls it.”

Thomas cracked up, too. “But we can offer drinks. And, you know…”

Logan raised an eyebrow at him, amused. “Ears?”

“Right,” Thomas nodded. “Look at Tremzy over here, finishing my sentences.”

Remus let his smile die down a little. “I…thanks, guys. I mean, I love talking to Sirius, but I also…he is the Captain. He’s a representation of all of us. I feel a little…” Remus took a slow breath, not sure if he was even ready for the words to come out of his mouth. “I feel a little like I’m letting him, and you all, down sometimes.”

“Aw, Loops,” Thomas said, voice softened.

“I know,” Remus sighed. “It’s just…it creeps in sometimes.”

Remus watched Logan swallow. “I get it. If there’s anything I can understand it’s guilt.”

“Tremz,” Remus said comfortingly. “I guess I should listen to my own advice here, but it’s not your fault. I can be ears, too, you know.”

“Is this…” Thomas said quietly. “Carrot?”

They both stared at him. “Carrot?”

“Code names,” Thomas whispered, even though the tables were noisy and the bar was somewhat empty.

Logan laughed a little, and nodded.

Remus waited. Logan gathered thoughts slowly, carefully. Interrupting, he’d learned while talking with Leo, tended to scatter them. He was also happy that the spotlight wasn’t entirely on him anymore.

“I found him at Harvard,” Logan began, swallowing dryly despite the drink in his hand. “And I was a mess. And then we spent that year apart, and I was a mess. And then I found him again, in Gryffindor, and I was a mess. I fell in love with Leo and I was a mess.” He looked at them, eyes pleading, then back down at his drink. “I am so, so happy now. It worked out. I can’t believe my luck. I wake up so fucking happy every morning. Every little look at them, my life with them, is incredible.”

Remus and Thomas waited some more. Thomas sent Remus a half smile across him, then leaned his cheek on his fist.

Finally, Logan finished. “But I can’t remember the last time I wasn’t a mess without them.” He closed his eyes, exhaled a frustrated breath through his nose. “That doesn’t make sense.”

Thomas nodded. “Yeah, it really does. Tremz, I get it.” He tilted his glass, making his ice cubes stir the liquid inside. “You’re someone when you’re with who you love. But you gotta be your own someone, too.”

“Ouais,” Logan was already nodded. “Right, like…Re, you’re you, no matter what. Leo, he’s the same way. Finn, too.”

Remus sighed. “I’m not so sure right now. But I think what you’re saying makes sense. Tremz, you’re allowed to want that for yourself. It’s not a slight to the boys. At all.”

Logan laughed, still laced with frustration. He rubbed at his eyes. “But I don’t even know what I’m asking for.”

Remus smiled. “Hate to break it to you, but you’ve got a pretty level-headed duo in your corner. I mean, Finn’s Finn.”

Thomas snorted. “Might take him a second.”

Logan smiled and it was fond. “Yeah.”

“But Leo…” Remus snapped his fingers. “He’ll get it. They both will.”

Logan narrowed his eyes at the bar. “I’m not asking for space. I don’t want space. I don’t want anything to change I just want to stop feeling like I’ll crash and burn by myself.”

“Me too,” Remus admitted. “Maybe in a different way, but…me too.”

“I don’t know if I feel like I’m gonna crash,” Thomas said thoughtfully. “But hey, life’s tough sometimes.” He smiled and raised his glass. “Friends.”

They clinked their glasses together, laughing, the conversation turning to organizing a pick-up game in the park that weekend—if it didn’t snow. 

“Gotta use the big WC, gents,” Thomas said after a while, picking up his crutches. “Then pool?”

“Who the hell calls it that?” Remus snorted.

“Me,” Thomas called over his shoulder, politely excusing his way through the crowd with his charming smile and causing a few longing looks to follow him at his back.

Logan drained the last of his rum and coke. “You don’t feel like Cap’s putting pressure on you, do you?”

Remus looked at him, eyes widening for a moment. “God, no. No, he’s been nothing but supportive. It’s mostly me, I think. He even wants to talk about it. Sometimes I just…can’t.”

Logan nodded. “Good. No, good, I just thought I’d ask. When I first met him, he’d get like that with me sometimes. Wanting to run extra drills or talk through tape. I snapped at him for it a bit. This was before he was really who he is now.”

“Parents were lingering in him,” Remus nodded. “Yeah, I remember.”

A man came to lean against the bar beside Remus, then, and Remus shot him a smile that he hoped looked friendly rather than uneasy. The guy was really in his space. He shared a look with Logan, who’s shoulders were rounded a little in alert, green eyes narrowed in on the guy.

“You’re Lupin, eh?” the man said.

Remus sighed softly, looking down at his now watery drink. He should’ve known.

“Yep,” he replied, and looked at the man. He had two friends, hovering a little ways back.

“What’s going on this season, huh?”

The worst part was that the man was smiling, as if he thought this conversation was going to go well.

“I mean, I know you’re with the Captain and all,” the man said. “But, I mean…come on. Some of us care about how the team does.”

“Excuse me?” Remus replied.

The man tilted his head, looking mockingly regretful. “It’s not just about you.”

“Okay,” Remus said, keeping his voice flat.

“What he do to get you there?” the man asked, leaning in like they were friends. “I mean, like…some type of reward, or does he already give you those at home?”

Remus flushed. “I think we’re done talking.”

At least his friends had the decency to look a little nervous.

The man narrowed his eyes. “I’m just saying.”

“Fuck off, man,” Logan said in a low tone.

“What,” he sneered. “You got yourself a boyfriend, too, Tremblay?”

Logan was on his feet then, stools screeching back, taller than the man, stronger. Remus’ arm shot out against his chest, keeping him and his balled fists back. The man’s friend stepped forward, too.

“Whoa, Mike,” one of the friends said, hesitating. “That’s not why we…that’s not what this is.”

“Oh,” Thomas scoffed, announcing himself as he made his way back to them. He somehow made his crutches and boot look threatening. “Wrong type of harassment for you, my guy?”

The fans’ eyes went large. “Talker…”

Thomas just stared at them, and Remus watched him go from Thomas Walker with his friends to Thomas Walker on the ice, defensemen. Enforcer. “Only my friends call me that. Sit down at your own table or get out.”

Thomas shouldered through them, one crutch landing briefly on Mike’s shoe, who only just bit back a groan. Thomas was all bright, sharp grin as he sat down, leaning his crutches against the bar again. He waved the bartender over, then looked at Mike who was still standing there.

“Do I have say it again for you?” Logan snarled. “Trust me, you don’t want me to.”

Logan sat down slowly as the three men backed up and turned away. Remus pressed a thankful hand to his shoulder, also meant to calm him down a bit.

“Well, that was fun,” Thomas sighed. “Jesus. We take you out to forget about it and those three show up.”

“It’s fine,” Remus said, though his heart was pounding. “I’m surprised that was the first time it happened. Had a close call at the grocery store the other day.”

“Another round?” Logan asked. “Then pool?”

“Ouais,” Remus smiled, in his best impression of Sirius.

~

Most of November passed without change. Remus felt the stagnant ball of frustration in his stomach. He and Sirius cooked together, slowly mastering more and more recipes. Remus lived for the triumphant look on Sirius’ face when a dish came out just right. He went out with Logan and Thomas, with James and Sirius, Finn and Jackson and Kasey. He never felt more at home than when he was tucked against Sirius’ side at a team dinner, watching Logan toss food into Finn’s mouth from across the table, hollering when he caught it and then ruffling an embarrassed Leo’s hair, who was shushing them.

The weather had officially turned to Gryffindor winter, biting harsher and harsher with each night. It got to the point where Marlene started bugging them all about the Christmas video—for the fans, she kept insisting. Come on guys, it’ll be fun!

Evgeni seemed to be the only one who was truly game for it.

Remus wasn’t unhappy, but the media was growing more and more aggravated with him, the fans’ patience was running thin like ice, and now Arthur had started sending him glancing looks until, finally, he pulled Remus into his office as the boys were packing up.

The ball rolled around Remus’ ribs, fighting for space with his heart, and he sat in the leather chair across from Arthur’s desk.

Arthur took off his glasses, which was a bad sign. He didn’t say anything for a long time and Remus didn’t have the courage to make him.

“I know,” Remus finally said, and then his throat choked up. “I’m…”

“I don’t want any apologies,” Arthur said. “And, God, Lupin, I didn’t bring you in here to yell at your so get that look off your face.”

Remus blinked through the scarce relief and looked down at his hands.

“Media’s being real tough, I know,” Arthur sighed. “I know. I just want to make sure you’re all right.”

“I’m fine,” Remus said. “I’m just…it’s not connecting, I…I don’t know. Maybe I could put in more time one-on-one with one of the coaches. Or ground work with the trainers. I know we’re about to go on the road. Maybe tomorrow morning before practice.”

Arthur hesitated, then nodded. “If you’d like. But overworking yourself isn’t gonna help if that’s not the issue. Frankly, I don’t think skill is the issue. You’re a beautiful skater out there. You’re wicked fast and can misdirect hits like I’ve never seen. But…”

“No net,” Remus mumbled.

Arthur looked regretful. “No net.”

Remus nodded. “I’m working on it. I’m doing everything I can.”

“I don’t doubt that, Remus. Really. Don’t think I do. I’ll be seeing you at the Dumais Thanksgiving, yeah?” Arthur asked.

Remus nodded, spared a smile. “Of course.”

Arthur smiled back and rose. He clapped Remus on the back as he opened the door to his office again. “Good. Try and relax over the break, okay? I know it’s short, but sometimes its less work that pays off. It doesn’t always have to be more.” He looked up. “Ah, another young rascal I’ve had to say that to.”

Remus looked up to see Sirius’ smile, his dark hair curling against his neck, but otherwise tucked under a thick black winter hat. Every muscle in Remus’ body eased at the sight of him. He wanted to wrap himself up in Sirius, tuck himself inside of his winter coat and never leave.

“Cap,” Arthur gave him a nod. “See you for Turkey. Who you’ve got for the big game?”

Sirius just shrugged. “American football. Who cares?”

Arthur made a wounded noise—and another one came from Leo and Thomas down the hall as they were bundling up for the cold. Evgeni was holding Thomas’ crutches for him as Jackson helped him into his coat. Remus cracked up and took the warm palm Sirius held out. They walked down the hallway that smelled familiar and warm, under toned by the scent of carpet and cleaner that, had it been any stronger, would have been unpleasant, but it just added to the familiarity.

The garage door rattled shut behind them as Sirius unlocked their back door, letting them into their warm kitchen. Remus shook out of his coat, hanging it in the closet and rubbing his hands together. With his coat and bag, he tried to drop everything else at the door. This was his and Sirius’ space. This wasn’t a rink, or a locker room, or the press room. Theirs. The word was warmer than the heat Sirius had set to come on a half hour before they got home.

“I’m starving,” he said. “What do you feel like? I maybe want pasta.”

“I feel like you,” came the reply from behind him.

Remus’ smile was slow and he turned to see a glint in Sirius’ eye. “What is it, the cold weather? You’ve been all riled up after games lately.”

Sirius just grinned, hands squeezing Remus’ hips. “I love watching you out there.” He pressed a kiss to Remus’ cheek, his neck and his nose, between each phrase. “I love your face, I love your feet, I love your shoulders, and the way you bite the finger of your glove while you watch the game between shifts.” The kisses got considerably more heavy, lingering and accompanied by the the brush of a tongue and teeth. “I love the way you cradle a puck and the way you tape your stick. The way your hair sticks to your neck.”

Remus just smiled, eyes closed. “I’ve been playing like shit.”

“Nu-uh,” Sirius said, and Remus whined a little at the next nip, letting Sirius rock him back against the kitchen counter. “Slumps are normal. You play amazing. Just no points. Shit and slumps,” Sirius said, and Remus’ mouth went dry as he was lowering himself to his knees. “Shit and slumps are different.”

Remus let out a laugh. “Aren’t those the words to turn a guy on.”

Sirius just grinned and bit at his pants zipper. “I love you.”

“Better choice.”

Sirius carefully pulled Remus’ zipper down. “Can I? Here?”

Remus only reply was tugging Sirius’ hat free to get at his hair, the thick strands weaving between his fingers. He could already feel himself getting interested, pressing against the slip of his boxers by Sirius’ proximity alone.

“Sirius Black,” Remus sighed as Sirius nuzzled against him.  He stroked over his hair, overwhelmed with how much every part of Sirius meant to him. “I love you.”

Sirius took one of the hands Remus had in his hair by and kissed the inside of his wrist.

Remus let Sirius’ mouth fuzz his mind out, moaning softly at his hollowed out cheeks, laughing at the gentle nips to his hips and thighs. After, Sirius kissed him against the counter until both of their stomachs growled. Remus pressed his mouth against Sirius’ flushed hot cheek.

“I feel like a million bucks, thanks, baby.”

Sirius just smiled, tucking himself away.

It was true. Remus felt home. Settled. Almost as if he could forget the conversation today. Maybe even like he wanted to go down the the basement rink, just for fun, which he hadn’t felt like in a while.

“D’accord,” Remus sing-songed. “We have pasta or chicken or both.”

Sirius grinned. “Both.”

They were mostly quiet as they cooked, bumping hips, iPhone playing softly through their speakers. Remus watched the way Sirius kept his fingers carefully curled away from the knife, like Remus’ mom had taught him that summer. His tongue peaked out of the corner of his mouth, the same way it did when he was carrying a puck up the ice.

“Do you want to talk about it?” Sirius asked softly as Remus minced garlic.

Remus glanced over at him, then kept his eyes on his fingers, so close to the sharp blade. “Um. Coach says it’s not my fault. He says I’m playing well. It’s just…pointless.”

“C’est pas—”

“No, not like pointless, like, pointless. Like I’m not getting net.”

“Ah.”

They smiled at each other, Remus’ a little shakier.

“Yeah.”

I feel like I’m letting you down.

“I feel…” Remus began, and the words caught. “Um. I mean, it’ll get better. It has to.”

Sirius’ expression flickered, but he nodded. “Mhm.”

“Do you feel like a white sauce?” Remus asked, turning to the refrigerator. “Go well with the chicken.”

“Sure,” Sirius nodded. “Sounds perfect, mon loup.”

Remus took a long breath as he opened the refrigerator doors, maybe taking longer than necessary to find the half & half. He was angry at himself. He didn’t know why the words were sticking to the back of his throat. He didn’t want pity, he supposed. He didn’t want Sirius to feel like he had to comfort him. Remus closed his eyes.

He’d do better.

~

Leo and Finn had their shoulders pressed together, each with their own book in their hands, when Logan opened the apartment door.

“Got the cream,” Logan raised the shopping back, and Leo all but leapt from the cushions.

“Yeah you do,” Finn said without looking up.

“Thank you,” Leo slid on his socks in his rush to get to Logan. He pressed his palms to Logan’s cold cheeks, kissing him in a quick burst. “Thank you, thank you, I love you.”

Logan smiled as Leo scurried back into the kitchen to finish making his part of the the American Thanksgiving dinner Pascal was hosting.

“I can’t believe I ran out,” Leo said, stirring something on the stove.

“It’s fine, Le,” Logan said, shrugging out of his jacket and following him in. “Happy to get you whatever you need.”

Leo turned, a touched pout on his face, and Logan beat him to it this time with a slower kiss of his own. Leo tasted like the caramel he had had them all taste test earlier and Logan licked into his mouth eagerly.

“I love you, too,” Logan mumbled.

Leo’s expression softened in the way it always did when one of them said that. Maybe Logan wasn’t the only one who couldn’t believe his luck.

“Want to peel sweet potatoes?” Leo asked with a hopeful grin, and Logan laughed.

“Sure, soleil.”

Finn gasped from the couch, eyes on his book, glasses on his nose. “They kissed. I fucking knew they would.”

Leo gasped, too. “No. Harzy, spoilers, you’re faster than me.”

Logan looked between them. “Are you guys reading the same book again, like, next to each other?”

“Sorry,” Finn said, but he was gripping the book like another secret might spill out. “And yes.”

Leo pressed a peeler into his hands with another kiss, this one fast and skittering across his cheekbone.

“I love both of you,” Logan sighed as he picked up the first potato. “You’re weird.”

Finn closed his book without marking his place and heaved himself up with a groan, cracking his back. He came to sit at the bar counter across from where Logan was peeling.

“Thanks for the help, Harz,” Logan said.

“I don’t like it when my hands smell like potato.”

Leo laughed. “Sweetheart, how’d you ever survive on your own?”

“Take out,” Finn and Logan answered at the same time.

“And catering,” Finn added. “I think the NHL is used to boys who can’t cook. Marlene just slid the caterer’s card into my hand without a word.”

Leo just shook his head. “She tried the same thing on me. Honey, please.”

Logan and Finn shared a smile, both turning to gaze at Leo’s back.

“How much time do we have?” Leo asked.

“Like, two hours, babe, you’re good,” Finn said.

“Do I have time to ravish you in your glasses?” Logan asked.

Finn raised a teasing eyebrow. “Oh, these old things? You want to wear them?”

Logan dropped his peeler and walked around the counter. He spun Finn to face him on the stool and Finn’s feet hooked around his calves, holding him there. “Non.”

Finn smiled, leaning forward to nip at Logan’s bottom lip and pull.

“Tremblay, potatoes.”

Logan groaned and Finn gave his butt a firm slap as he pulled away. “Sorry, sorry, sorry.”

~

“Uh, hey dad,” Cole cleared his throat. “It’s me. I just um. I’m in Pascal Dumais’ house. Can you believe that? Uh, I just wanted to say…you know, happy Thanksgiving, and all that. Maybe you can come out to a game soon? Yeah…let me know, I can get you tickets. Okay. Okay, see you. Merry—or happy Thanksgiving. Yeah, okay. Bye.”

Cole sighed as he put his phone down and looked around the Dumais’ sitting room. It was tidy, with food laid out every table, ready for guests. Cole, after that phone call, already felt tired.

There was a knock on the doorframe and he turned to see Layla, smiling at him hesitantly. She held out a glass of a deep colored wine. “I thought maybe you’d want some.”

“Oh, I can’t, uh…” Cole began.

Layla snorted. “Me neither, but…” she glanced around the tall-ceilinged living room. “Who’s gonna tell? Dumo? Please.”

Cole laughed a little and took the thin stem from her fingers. “Thank you.”

Layla nodded, bending for a cheese and cracker. “That sounded a little tough. If you don’t mind me saying.”

Cole pocketed his phone. “It’s not really. Well…maybe now it is. But I don’t think of him that way, of this that way. He’s a good father.”

He sounded defensive even to himself and sighed. “When he decides to be.”

“He hard on you?” Layla asked. She took a seat on the couch and Cole glanced around before settling on the ottoman of one of the fat leather chairs. “About all this?”

“Hockey?” Cole said, then laughed. “No. No way, he doesn’t give a shit about ice hockey. My mom got me into hockey. My dad still hopes I’ll be, like, I don’t know…I don’t know what.”

Layla frowned. “It’s not like you could’ve been a money-bags doctor and chose to paint watercolors instead?”

Cole cracked a smile. “Yeah…Yeah, he sort of skipped around a lot before I actually started getting good.”

“Oh,” Layla said softly.

The doorbell rang. And then rang again and again, like someone was jamming their finger into it repeatedly.

“Tremzy!” he heard Katie shriek a moment later.

Warm voices filled the hall.

Cole rose and, after a moment, offered Layla a hand. She smiled, letting him pull her up. “It’s not as sob-story as it sounds.”

“I get it,” Layla nodded. “My older sister skipped altogether when I was little. Still don’t know why. I know it’s not the same but…”

“I’m sorry,” Cole said.

Layla just smiled, one of her bright ones, and wrapped her hand—gold rings and all—around his arm. “Come on. Shit’s about to get wild.”

“And delicious,” Cole said, turning towards the smells coming from the kitchen.

Layla laughed, and Cole wanted to hear that sound twenty more times.

[thehouseoflamentation]

how about a solomon/f! mc breeding fic where solomon picks mc to breed because her angelic bloodline? being descended from angels is no small thing& if past scenes said anything, mc's magic potential is through the roof &any little sorcerers begotten from their union would be Hella powerful. I can just see a smug solomon pulling all "witch after your firstborn" vibes. as for kinks, idk, blowjob (for ritual purposes ; ) ), and most important!! no sappiness only lust & doing it for science/power

One Solomon fic hold the sugar coming right up!

Making a Sorcerer’s Firstborn (Solomon x Fem!MC) ~NSFW~ |BREAD|

Solomon had always wondered what made you special ever since he met you that first day at RAD. As one of the most powerful sorcerers the world has ever seen, it’s clear why he was chosen for the exchange program but you were a different case. At first glance you seemed to be….well, an ordinary human. Nothing wrong about that but also nothing extraordinary either. Then again, despite what looks might suggest you had managed to make pacts with some of the highest ranking demons in the devildom, a feat no typical human would be able to accomplish in such a short amount of time. Solomon started to wonder if there was something he wasn’t quite picking up here, a part of you that you’ve been hiding from others, some kind of extra edge. It wasn’t until that fateful day at the Demon Lord’s Palace that things started to become even more interesting. For the first time he saw just how powerful your magic potential was. Being able to increase a demon’s power was one thing but to strengthen Asmo to such an extent that he changed his mind about making a pact with you? There was no way he could ignore something like that.

When news quietly started to spread that one of the human exchange students wasn’t so human after all Solomon knew he had to get to the bottom of your secret. He would have never suspected that you came from an angelic bloodline but the theory held up. It explained why you had such a high magical potential despite the fact that you didn’t even know magic existed until a few months ago. A part of him couldn’t help but envy you but at the same time he wondered how powerful a child created between the both of you could be. With your lineage and his background in magic there was no doubt that your child would grow to have a strong inclination for magic, possibly even surpassing that of their parents. As intrigued as Solomon was at that thought he didn’t think you would ever agree to such a proposal. Bearing his child for the sake of prospect and power sounded absurd! Then again as someone who managed to convince 72 demons to form pacts with him, how hard can it be to persuade a human of all things?

“So...let me get this straight. You want to take advantage of my angelic bloodline and impregnate me to create an extremely powerful magic baby?”

“Yes”

“I’m in”

“WaiT REALLY?!??!”

“On one condition”

“....go on”

“I want you to teach me the breeding spell”

“Oh?” Solomon’s lips curled into a smirk once he heard your terms. He knew quite well what that spell was capable of and found it rather ironic that someone who was part angel could be so sinful. Nevertheless, he accepted your offer and extended a hand towards you.

“Deal”

Back in Purgatory Hall neither of you wasted a moment getting started. What began as a few kisses quickly escalated to bites and hickeys as the two of you rushed to remove your clothes. Taking a seat at the edge of the bed, Solomon placed his hands on your shoulders pushing you down to your knees in front of him. Undoing his belt and zipper you stripped him to his boxers and began licking him through the fabric, your saliva mixing with his precum. Solomon hissed as your tongue ran over a particularly sensitive spot along his length. It wasn’t long before the outline of his hardened dick became visible through his boxers and once that last remaining piece of cloth was gone so was your restraint. Without a shred of hesitation, you took the head of his cock into your mouth and began swirling your tongue around it earning a rather audible groan from the sorcerer. Once you worked your way down to the base, his hand brushed some of your hair behind your ear before tilting your head up to look at him. Your eyes were glazed, the only emotion that shone through them was lust, a feeling Solomon knew all too well from dealing with Asmo.

You were so given to your desires you didn’t even notice Solomon recite the breeding incantation until you felt a rush of heat pool in your stomach and between your legs. The sudden increase in sensitivity sent shivers down your spine making you pause in the middle of your actions, something that wasn’t taken so well by your partner who was just as equally as affected as you were. Delving his fingers between your locks Solomon gripped your hair and continued where you had left off, thrusting his hips as he held your head in place. His speed was slow at first but the impact was enough to snap you back into reality. You struggled to match his pace as his thrusts grew more and more erratic, each movement pushing the tip of his dick further towards the back of your throat. Craving even more stimulation you let one of your hands slip beneath your underwear, slowly rubbing circles around your clit while your other hand played with your nipple. Your stifled moans made the walls of your throat clench and vibrate against Solomon’s cock, driving him to the edge as his salty, bitter seed coated your mouth and dripped down your chin.

Staring up breathlessly at Solomon you felt his hand gently stroke your hair, a rather tender expression considering his previous actions and those that would soon follow.

“Such a good little slut~ Already a mess when we’ve barely even started...”

Taking you in his arms, he lifted you onto the bed and spread your legs apart. You were already so wet, so ready for him, and yet he still felt the need to tease you a bit. Resting his head against your thigh he lapped the juices around your entrance and stroked your clit with the tip of his tongue enjoying the way your body squirmed and cried out at his touch. Pushing you even further to your breaking point, he slipped two of his fingers inside of you and watched as you gripped the sheets each time he curled them or rubbed against your walls.

When he finally pulled away it was only to replace his fingers with something much longer and thicker. You could feel his length throbbing against your entrance and, being in heat, you couldn’t help but rub yourself against him to gain even the smallest amount of friction and relief as your body pleaded for him to just take you. Solomon merely chuckled at your enthusiasm and toyed with your impatience even more as he slid the head of his cock inside you at a painfully slow pace. Once he was half way inside he finally gave you what you wanted, mercilessly ramming the rest of his cock inside you until you reached the base. His hips slammed against yours recklessly as you wrapped your legs around him urging him to hit your deepest parts. Keeping his pace, Solomon buried his head in the crook of your neck leaving behind bite marks and hickeys wherever his mouth left your skin. You could feel the heat of his breath as he leaned towards your ear, his lips twisted into a smirk as he spoke once again.

“I didn’t think you’d be so desperate to be bred MC. The way you have those demon brothers wrapped around your finger, you could have gotten fucked by any one of them if you wanted. But instead you’re here with me taking me in so well.... Tell me MC, with how tight you’re squeezing me, are you sure I’m the only one who wants this baby?”

You barely had the concentration or the time to reply as you felt your climax just beyond your reach. All you could do was moan and cling to Solomon in response to his words which, to him, was the best kind of answer you could give. Grabbing onto your hips for more leverage his thrusts became more reckless with each passing second. The heat growing within your core felt unbearable as your body grew closer and closer to release. After brushing against a particularly sensitive area, your walls became tighter which only made Solomon pound into your sweet spot even harder. With one last deep thrust you had both reached your limit. As you came you could feel his length throb inside of you as his warm load filled you and dripped onto the sheets. When you had finally milked every last drop of his cum, Solomon pulled out only to flip you onto your back and reposition himself at your entrance once again.

“Don’t think we’re done just because round one is over. We’ve got a baby to make and until the spell wears off we’re gonna make the most out of every second.”

Neither of you remember how many times you had sex the next few days but with the sheer amount of cum that was poured into you there was no doubt that you would bear Solomon’s baby soon enough. On the last day of the spell when its effects had finally weakened the two of you finally got some rest, dazed and exhausted from your time together.

“Y’know Solomon, I’ve been thinking...”

“Hm?”

“If this kid has white hair….how are we gonna break it to Mammon that it’s not his?”

“FUCK”

[vergilboyfriend]

You should do all of them questions and 90 is true

I love you!!!!

1. Favorite instrument?

I work at a music store u can’t just ask me this. When my coworkers play it’s the saxophone or the flute, when the boys in the repair shop are testing repairs and they harmonize with each other or try to outplay one another it’s the bassoon or the trombone or whatever they’re fixing at the moment. When I hear 🎺 give his lesson on Wednesday afternoons it’s the trumpet, and when I think about middle school it’s the clarinet, the flute, the French horn. When I hear the nutcracker pas des deux is the oboe and when I hear edith piaf l’accordeoniste it’s the remarkable human voice. Really my favorite instrument is all of them, it just depends.

2. Favorite fic trope? Mutual pining 🥺

3. Sport you played for the longest amount of time? LMAO I wasn’t a sporty kid but I did ballet

4. Shoe size? 10-11

5. Most recent (good) dream? Uhh I had a dream last night about my coworker 🎹 it wasn’t bad though I can’t really remember what it was about

6. Last person in your DMs? smugg

7. Can you do a handstand? Nooo nooo lmaoo nooooo

8. Unpopular food opinion I don’t like oranges or red meat

9. Conspiracy you believe in? There’s some kind of weird weather dome in my hometown around the military base that makes most storms pass around us

10. Is your hair its natural color/style? Most of it is I dyed the bottom layer of my hair tho so it’s blonde rn

11. state a useless fact all that’s coming to mind is outright lies rn hold on. The inventor of pringles is buried in a pringles can that’s so fucking nasty omg

12. most interesting gossip you’ve heard? Idk I don’t really care for gossip uhhhh have u heard tho rin dippindogs is a huge gay hah she uhh she like men AND women lmao gaaay gaaaay

13. Middle name? Carolyn

14. Sexuality? Bisexual

15. Amount of sleep you got last night? Idk actually I think like 9-10 hrs tho I slept in until 11

16. Opinion on ice cream cake? Tasty!!!

17. Opinion on (cup)cake frosting? It’s depends buttercream is usually too sweet for me in large amounts so I prefer whipped cream frosting

18. Last board game you played? Idk??? We played hunt a killer tho last Thursday me n my family I guess that counts kinda

19. Project you want to start? I need ideas first baby

20. Project you’re working on right now? HAHAHAHAHAHA

21. TV show you’re watching? nothing rn I just rewatch bojack a lot if I watch anything

22. Last movie you watched? Lego batman I think

23. Ever left anon hate? Not legit hate

24. Ever left anon love? Yes all the time. Sometimes to strangers it’s my favorite thing to do

25. Best Disney movie? The princess and the frog

26. Best Pixar movie? Soul or Up I can’t decide

27. Best Star Wars? Um. Empire strikes back

28. Last thing you consumed? Fuit gumy

29. NoTP? Idk I don’t really hate ships unless they’re gross like pedophilic gross

30. story behind your (nick)name? When I was a fetus my great grandfather had a dream that my name should be Carolyn Marie but my parents were huge dweebs so they named me Marina after the actress of Deanna Troi in Star Trek. Idk about my nickname ive just always been Rina/Rin as long as I can remember

31. ice cream order? Lately it’s lemon sorbetto I know it’s SO high in sugar but I love it

32. describe your blog in <5 words I love you

33. how many blogs do you follow? 436

34. Describe your voice it depends usually I sound like a sick child but my customer service voice is really pleasant

35. Describe your smile it’s cute :)

36. What is the place you live known for? LMAOOO LMAO we have a military base nearby and like. I could go on abt that one but also like. There’s a lot of gang violence and a lot of the other consequences of poverty. People from the cities around us see us as “””ghetto””” or violent but it’s just. It’s more than that it’s always more than that. And idk what else there’s nothing really particularly special about this town except that we’re all here and not anywhere else

37. What is the place you’re originally from known for? (if they’re different)

38. pronouns? she/any idc

39. Languages you speak? English

40. first friend you made through tumblr? Idk. I probably don’t talk to them anymore :(

41. Person on tumblr you know in real life? my brother

42. First dog breed you think of shih tzu I have 2 next to me rn

43. room wall color? Purble!!!! The paint color is called grape juice that’s why I picked it!!!

44. Song that’s stuck in your head right now? It’s tricky to rock a rhyme to rock a rhyme that’s right on time it’s trickyyyyy

45. Favorite number? 5, 34

46. Color you associate with your name? Red

47. Favorite jolly rancher flavor?watermelon

48. Pets? 2 dogs rocket and groot and 4 cats loki danni who r from the same litter and we raised from kittens, miss kitty who we adopted from a shelter after my boy blue moon passed away and ben (his real name is Kylo Ren thanks to my mom but I refuse to call him that) he is my little baby and he has 7 toes on his front paws

49. Collections? Hot wheels

50. Character outside of your fandom you’d marry? Girl what lmaooo idk

51. Character outside of your fandom you’d kill? That’s mean :(

52. Have you met any celebrities? NO thank god id have to kill on sight

53. Favorite time period in history? Itslian Renaissance & Romantic Era

54. What time is it right now? 2:35 am oops

55. History or future? Future but like . A good one. Or prehistory

56. Space or ocean? Space

57. Fears? Abandonment

58. Command + v and post. It’s this list of questions u don’t want that

59. Favorite season? Spring

60. Describe your aesthetic. Messy just a mess, neon and old buildings and things, antiques, countryside if there weren’t so many trump pence flags still lmaoo give uppp give up, nature just al of nature and space and places humans can’t touch and places they used to touch but can’t anymore

61. MBTI? Infp but I haven’t taken it in a few years

62. What’s your relationship with your family like? Normal.

63. “Biggest fan” in your tumblr activity? I’m in mobile hold on acc to tumblr it’s akky

64. Favorite musical? Sweeney todd

65. Comfort book? Idk how to read 💔💔💔 wuthering heights tho

66. Comfort movie? Whisper of the heart

67. OTP? Girl idk

68. BroTP? Joey and Tristan yugioh

69. AUs or canon compliant? Canon ig idk

70. Opinion on the person who’s sending the ask? It’s an anon!! But I love them

71. FMK + 3 characters anon didnt leave any characters and I was going to say something very bad but I won’t

72. Dream date? I’ve wanted to do this for a while but ideally it would be after we’d been together a while maybe even engaged or whatever, I wanna go to like a Home Depot or a furniture store and pretend to be married and looking for house paints and furniture and plan what our home is going to look like I wanna do that so bad. But idk for a first/early relationship date i really want to go to the zilker botanical garden it’s one of my favorite places, we could also go to the natural gardener which is a plant nursery in Austin I really love it there too and it’s not that far from zilker.

73. Relationship status? Single

74. Ever dyed your hair? Do you plan to? Yes and perhaps. Maybe

75. Dream job/career? Idk anymore I used to have big girl goals and I haven’t had any in a while. But when I was younger I wanted to be a game warden

76. Favorite band/singer? Pyotr Ilyich Tchaikovsky

77. Something that makes you soft/that you find adorable? My cats

78. The first thing you would do if you won the lottery? Buy a house

79. Are you superstitious? Yes

80. Character you project onto? Shizuku tsukishima

81. Fictional character you’ve had a crush on? Vergil devil may cry. Forever husband

82. Celebrity crush? LMAO

83. Person on here you’d date? my mutuals

84. Person on here you’d marry? 🥺 my mutuals

85. Person on here you’d throw into the void? Smugg

86. Other social media you have? I’ve got a photography insta that I barely use and a Twitter that’s just nintendo switch screenies that’s it

87. Finish the sentence: Due to personal reasons, ___________i will be passing away

88. Bad habit? I find it rlly hard to say no or like to say when and why I’m upset I don’t feel like for the latter I don’t feel like I should bring something that’s upsetting me up because I know I’ll get over it on my own and I don’t really trust myself to be upset about rational things. Idk I’m working on it

89. Three things you like about yourself? I’m hot, I’m kind, I’m resilient

90. Ily and you deserve the world I love you!!!!! YOU deserve it too!!!

[shytiff]

Small Dec Wins

i cant believe its December already tf?!?!?!

1 - poli KIA today. saw a mother who cant feel the movement of their baby. the senior midwife tried to find the baby’s heart beat but not finding it. she said she hopes she were wrong. fell asleep at 3pm-ish, woke up super hungry. ate. i swear i feel like my weight when i measured it this morning was ~52, but after eating its close to 54 lol. eating banana and chocolate nextar is yummm. dalbang today is hella funny as always and suuper endearing. fell asleep after dalbang, didnt study hufttt

2 - today im at igd but joined azkia at vk for a bit to see partus. its not that im scared (maybe not consciously) but when the mom was being stitched i felt lightheaded, nausea, cold extremities, and i even had to squat multiple times because i couldnt stand. But i felt better after the partus so maybe seeing it was the cause. I did not feel scared at all honestly ._. and i’ve seen multiple partus before. i dont know why. i can literally feel my symphatetic tone giving out lmaoo. tried matcha latte with Cy matcha powder. it tasted more milky and grassy. mom thought it tasted like nori. i prever cocodeli alll the way (although Cy is cheaper). i think it also has a bit of caffeine that made me feel awake like a normal person should be. 

3 - today is vk but there’s no patient so thank god i saw sumn yesterday. did some cicil ukmppd in the morning accompanied by matcha latte. tried to order dufan tickets and i couldnt find my damn ktp...... fell asleep after worrying about said ktp

4 - matcha latte in the car, swab at lmk, went to dufan by tj with willy, had quite some funn with atikah nila willy amel pupuy. first time trying kereta misteri, quite fun. it rained after ashar so we didnt ride anything after that. turns out my ktp was at barel’s fotocopy lmaoo thankyou ara for picking it. went to solaria ancol afterwards, picked up by mom. i didnt tell her in the morning that i was going to dufan lmao. plenary @ zoom 19 pm. rapat nemo. fell asleep.

5 - went to lmk by tj to surprise clara. went back home and fell asleep. didnt rly do anything afterwards because this ragged body gets tired easily and i dont eat much recently. i can feel the difference before and after eating and there’s actual energy after eating. its not that im hungry though, but i feel less energized. felt annoyed terrible and just wanna lay in bed (this is unrelated with the less food in my system). even though i met up with friends

6 - after LOTS of sleeping i feel somehow better but not to a ‘normal’ amount. watched kimbab family videos. did power vinyasa by doogether with fianti. took a shower and ate indomie and i felt quite normal, except i slept again wtf. i thought i would have the second half of the day but nah. did self tryouts with fianti, 150 FDI questions. I got 96/150 right. huft. such a great reality check

7 - poli lansia with dokter isip, matcha latte in the afternoon rly helps me not sleeping the day away, packed up for depok

8 - poli umum with dr gita (helped doing phys exam), packed the rest of my stuff, ate some risol and matcha lattteee in the car, took swab results, picked up hazmats etc, zoom discussion with FT PKM Kalideres (dr gita) on the way, and i finally arrived at tamel. dinner is granola with vsoy. Taste like a slightly wet granola bar, nutty fiber-y vibe

9 - walked in ui with ara, managed to jog from the trees near st ui until kuburan bikun wow. i reached that point where my leg and heart were going in a steady unburdened pace and my willpower to keep going on was tested. tried the signature steak in Double U Steak by Chef Widi, while ara tried ribeye. the ribeye was more tender than the signature. but the seasoning in the signature is quite delish, salty and oily without being too much (like futago ya). read poppyland fast pass from ara’s phone omg season 1 is finally complete! went to coftof (omgggg i miss this place), it looks different now. ordered matcha latte and it tasted weirdly like a soy milk although ara doesnt feel that way. the matcha tasted weird. wont repurchase. read chainsaw man, its so entertaining, funny and deep at the same time. denji mess around and be too naive sometimes but hes lowkey hot lmaooo. aki is lovvvvve.

10 - first day at rsud budhi asih. had moesli combined with granola + vsoy for brekkie. went back to tamel at 3 pm. it rained when i got back. bought warteg lugina worth 32k. walked to sbux for tumbler day its been a while since i had their matcha latte. it tasted quite good, but not as good as i remembered (?) maybe bcs i asked for non fat milk. sbux closes at 8 pm for now hikss

11 - left tamel at about 7:10 and arrived on budhi asih at 08:54 yalll the traffic. Icu. Bought eatlah double and ate the salted egg part. Nap. ICU discussion with dr Dedi @8pm. I presented from my phone to save data hehe,,

12 - woke up at 8, eatlah brown butter for brekkie, symcard, saladstop's caesar salad for lunch (quite 'eneg' because i didnt eat the cheese evenly so the chicken and cheese were eaten last after the vegs are out. The vegetable's not that variative, and the non vegs make the salad taste delicious (albeit maybe not THAT healthy). Evening jog @UI and i realized i can get wifi sitting near the lake n library. Stared at the night sky from my room, i swear the sky seems super clear. Saw tiny fireworks in the distance

13 - ate muesli and saladstop’s banana walnut cake, symcard, bought moon chicken and saladpoint. lunch was egg salad and the wings. the original tasted so good like??? maybe i havent had msg for a while. also tried big bang, not too spicy which is nice. cicil ukmppd. put my laundry at buih barel lmaoo. try out with fianti. got 70/100

14 - breakfast was salad and leftover chicken. today was bangsal with angga armand. the geriatric patient has a loud murmur yall (and scoliosis, so much that the heart looks distorted). went to margo city to see sales, but when i think about it id rather just thrift stuff lmao. bought lugina. slept through kuliah guru besar. writing this in yellow truck coffee, that had 2 customers on the 1st floor including me. tried banana milk. yall after trying to drink less sugar the beverage tasted super sweet. my headache just goes away. sugar is magic but unhealthy whyyyyy.

15 - igd siang with indah. This body sure is frail. Did cbd with dr afifah AND rescheduled pleno. Rip mobile data i have to use for hotspot.

16 - ok today. Inserted goedel and did bagging. I bagged the patient the wrong way at first (too much). Thankfully the nurses were kind and taught us a lot :) watched some bts content. I feel like after reading househusband my tiktok page is now immensely funnier. Dalbang is also hilarious as always. Put on ginseng sheet mask (smells quite strong)

17 - bangsal. snacked on fried chicken. matcha latte starbucks (turns out its quite full here) and liqo about keeping our tongues in check

18 - arrived at icu. And then opened line. Turns out hadin's swab is positive, so agung kak iman and me have to isolate and swab. So i went back. Ordered kanayam chicken and fish and tempe. Nasi liwet tasted goood damn. Sleptt in the afternoon. Pleno at 4 pm (entered the room 4:30). Had no motivation to do anything. Azkia is getting married! Spent 20 mins formulating words to congratulate her lmaoo

19 - osce simulation, kak nanu was so kind and encouraging. Did try out solid. Lunch is fish bite pasta with melted cheese (cause i had to reach the minimum amount for promo). It got cold so its not that good (pairing it with self made mentai sauce, mixing the mayo and chili, is way much better). Jogged in ui (and searched for wifi). Approached by someone selling haraus coffee (25k), saying that some earnings will be for charity. Its basically sweet. Can barely taste the coffee.

20 - had kanayam for lunch (brekkie is almost always muesli lately). The nasi liwet tasted much better the first time. Walked to yellow truck coffee in the pouring rain. Got banana milk. Saw webinar ksk (electrolyte correction and dr nadhira talkshow). What i got from it is that, dr nadhira is a different person from the first place. Shes visionary, knows what she want and not afraid to reach it. The mindset is different. Even if i try as hard as her, her propensity to growth is different. Cicil ukmppd. Try out with fianti (got 72/100). Talked for an hour about love and marriage and engagements (there are so much of it lately)

21 - leftover kanayam for brekkie, also ate roti salman in cikini st. swab today (met kris, nessa and others). muesli for lunch. i thought my body felt a bit warm, so i decided to find sumn to eat. tried kedai abu bakar’s spaghetti brulee. its okay. maybe because its not too cheesy or meaty, mainly bechamel sauce. the one pupuy made is much tastier. finished the whole 10x20 portion in 2 eating sesh. cicil ukmppd @ bed in the evening (somehow felt refreshed enough to be able to concentrate in bed)

22 - went early to icu to put dops form. lugina for early lunch. i feel like my metabolism is faster? or my body is not so much in calorie deficit mode anymore and it got greedier lmao i used to just ignore hunger but not now, for health. starbiiies tumbler day. ordered black tea latte with non fat milk and vanilla syrup (because raspberry syrup is no more). did cbd geri ppt. 

23 - finally knew the swab result bcs kak iman asked kak farras. thankfully negative. igd with jordi. quite a few chances to do iv line, but i failed 2 times. managed to do iv injection to insert 2 drugs. saw the worst cpr ive ever seen in my life. its too slow, with maximal interruption. fish bite for lunch. wasted the rest of my day

24 - originally intended to run but i cant bring myself out of bed. packed up my stuff. picked up by mom. got the paper result of swab, got ksk from kelvyn @ capitol. can finally drink self-made matcha latte again, but it tasted horrible. i know cy matcha doesnt have that much going on, but even this is low even for them. previously i was starting to get used to the grassy smell.

25 - my lil bro remarked “maybe shes depressed because she doesnt have her chair”. fuck yall. this “depression” that im in is caused by this very place and the people. and im supposed to still muster the strength to study for ukmppd AND get my face together for solid book photoshoot. that shit is too much. this is why the money that goes to cafe, and the bike ride there is worth it for my sanity. after showering, things felt a bit better. had absolutely no will to study today. ate muesli with a bit of matcha latte.

26 - muesli for breakfast. matcha latte is lyfff ive probably said this before but it ~somehow~ makes me feel normal and not in a slump. like im a regular person. with normal moods. and not wanting to sleep all the time. i try to do ukmppd exercises but the pace is so fucking slow, bcs im distracted by get rich haha,,,. the latest potn update (64) is omgggg the mixed feelings? love? hate? anger? everything and nothing? the ~tension and passion~? im obsessed. watched a ton of bts content today and yesterday lmao.

27 - nasi kebuli for brekkie. went to flavola, im the first customer lmao. tried kopi susu coklat, tasted quite close enough to janjiw’s kopi soklat. had the same ~improved mood and concentration~ effect. tried to read ksk. bought milky banana 1L from puyo to give dajen (its his bday yesterday) (i feel prompted (?) to gift people when theyve given a present to me) (because my love lang is not gift giving at all so i barely think abt gifts lmao). talked with sum 33 ipa guys @ dajens house. yay appropriate amount of social battery charging. tryout with fianti, padi this time. got 67/100. 

28 - ate muesli with matcha latte after breakfast. cicil ukmppd. Listened to yoongi's vlive until i fell asleep lol. 2 burger and salad for dinner. omggg hansol revealed his gf. 

29 - spent half of my day tidying up the mess that is my room. figured out what to wear for solid book photoshoot with fianti, ara. matcha latte terosss. phd for dinner. 

30 - breakfast is muesli with cimory choco hazelnut. mom made matcha chocolate brownies. tryna study. slow pace terosss. read some padi materials. dalbang.

31 - bought vsoy low sugar and multigrain. moved my body a bit to youtube videos. showered. felt better. it also rained (which i love). the pleasant mood only lasted til the evening. did nothing from 7pm even though im not sleepy. cant tell when did i start to sleep

and just like that, 2020 kkeut. its sad to say i dont rly remember much remarkable things this year. other than the trip and memories with minor rotation friends. i just remember wasting my life away in my house. i guess that’s the danger of living a monotone life. sometimes you gotta invest some time to have fun, to have motivation to live on and do things. not doing this makes it difficult to live day by day. and friends. meeting friends, seeing new stuff. that helps me live. 

[mrsalwayswrite]

To Find the Light Again

This is my contribution to #waiting4Inspiration’s 2k writing challenge. I went a bit overboard but hey, its all good. I’ve never posted stories on here before so if the formatting is off please forgive me. 

My prompt was a/b/o dynamics and I chose Bucky Barnes as my muse. I’ve never written an a/b/o story before so it was a fun challenge. 

Some dark themes but nothing graphic. Some swearing. That’s about it for warnings. 

Chapter 1

 The metal chair dug into her back. The stale air in the small enclosed room chilled her. She was unsure how long she had been forced to sit in the uncomfortable chair but her ass was officially numb and her legs were getting there. Thankfully they had taken the restraints off her wrists when they tossed her into the room. No one had entered the room since she was unceremoniously deposited there. At least lights were on, even if it was annoying, flickering florescent lights. She hated the dark. Depending on how long she was kept here, her home emergency protocols would begin to alert the necessary people of her disappearance…abduction…whatever this was. This did not feel like HYDRA but she refused to be anything but a statue. No matter what they did to her, no matter what they said, she would not break. She refused to.

She sat up straight in the chair, hands loosely in her lap and legs under the metal table before her. Keeping her eyes closed, she focused on each slow, deep breath. To any outsider she would appear to be in a meditative state but truthfully, she struggled internally with saying goodbye to her life and those she loved. She did not expect to leave this room alive. The series of events that brought her here only confirmed that.

 Some time later the only door scrapped open and into the Spartan room walked someone she had hoped to never see. His alpha scent slammed into her first, like a thick syrup of sharp peppermint that made her eyes threaten to water and throat close up. Her own biology screamed at her to bare her neck and submit to the angry alpha. But she held perfectly still. She would not give in. Opening her eyes, she stared out at the man whom she assumed would be her interrogator. He presented an intimidating presence that any normal person should cower under. His dark skin glistened under the unflattering lights; his long black trench coat floated behind him like a dark cloud. Yet it was the single eye glaring at her from across the table that sent a shiver down her spine. His other eye covered by an ugly eyepatch…it made her wonder what happened.

Slowly and dramatically he tossed several pictures on the table. With a quick glance her blood froze. How did he find these? How did he find me? At least she knew who had captured her now. Not that being held prisoner by the Avengers brought her much comfort.

“Honestly I’m impressed by your performance so far.” The man spoke, voice rough and harsh, as he crossed his arms over his chest. “You’ve been in here three hours and not once have you moved nor spoken since you arrived. Most of the other HYDRA doctors or researchers don’t last nearly as long as you, always cursing or begging. I’m sure you know we are purging the world of the disease HYDRA is…so you have two choices in this. Either you help us on your own free will or we will be forced to use some…unsavory…methods to get information, then after that you can look forward to spending the rest of your life in a damn prison cell. Got it?”

Keeping her lips sealed, she just stared at the pictures laid out haphazardly before her. She looked so different in the photos compared to now.

“Your driver’s license says your name is Alicia Cox but we both know that’s fake, don’t we?” He changed tactics, glancing up at the wall to his left. She had guessed hours ago it was a one-way window. This only confirmed it. “No, when we first found your pictures in a HYDRA base surveillance, we were quite surprised. It took a lot of searching for you, cross matching, records and some good old-fashioned footwork. We even tailed a few other women thinking they were you. Yet here we are now. In the HYDRA paperwork you were referred to as Agent 72. The truth is your name is Jenna Lewis and the last records of you were filed by your college roommate as disappearing one night after a frat party. My guess…HYDRA recruited you and decided whatever undercover mission you were on was no longer necessary. Then with the downfall of Alexander Pierce and the helicarriers, you jumped from the drowning ship before it sucked you under.” Suddenly he slammed his hands on the table and leaned forward, invading her personal space. “But you see, SHIELD might not be what it once was but we are still doing everything to pick up and disposed of all of HYDRA’s rats. So, tell me…Agent 72, were you a spy? A researcher of some kind?”

No response from her. The only sound was the buzzing from the florescent lights and her heart pounding in her ears.

He barked out a harsh laugh. “You got balls but they won’t save you. We have Tony Stark and the Black Widow currently looking into everything they can about you. Whatever secrets you think you can hide form us…well, know we will fuck up anything that gets in our way. Now, I suggest you make yourself comfortable. You will be here a long damn time.”

After one last hesitation, he stood up and exited the interrogation room. When the sound of a lock echoed through the small room, she let her head drop, chin resting on her chest. All the years of hiding, changing identities, living in shitty places, doing everything to stay off the radar led to this. She would have laughed if she could at the situation she found herself in. This was the end of the line for her. She had done everything and they still found her. Faces filled her mind as time slowly passed. It was not enough but it was all she would get. Wiping the single tear away, she closed her eyes once again. Finally, she gave into whatever fate had in mind for her. As long as her family was safe, nothing else mattered.

��~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Bucky sat in the dark kitchen, nursing his second cup of black coffee. Only the streetlights and sunrise shed light into the room. He stared into the black, steaming liquid as if it held the answers to his questions. Unfortunately, if it did, it did not feel like sharing today.

“Buck, you ok?”

He looked over his shoulder at his best friend entering. Steve’s hair was messy and he was still in sweatpants and a t-shirt. He must have just rolled out of bed. As he approached, Steve’s beta scent drifted to him, calming him slightly. His scent reminded Bucky of a hot cinnamon latte, warm and inviting.  

Bucky just shrugged.

“Nightmare?”

Staring back into his mug, Bucky did not even acknowledge the question. Steve probably already knew. At least this time he had not woken up screaming. Just a cold sweat and twisted sheets, feeling as if he was suffocating.

Without a word, Steve padded over and poured himself a cup of coffee. Unlike his best friend, Steve added an obscene amount of sugar before taking a sip. It made Bucky shake his head, remembering when they were young and how sparingly they had to use sugar. Steve had teased once saying he was making up for lost time now. They both knew Steve had an insane sweet tooth and now took every opportunity to fill it.

“Natasha called me…you remember that case she was working on? Some HYDRA agent they were having a hard time tracking down. Well I guess they finally got confirmation and picked her up. Fury already talked with her a couple of hours ago. He wants Natasha and me to take a turn interrogating. Guess she isn’t talking at all.” Steve said, casually looking over his mug.

“And you want me there to see if I can remember her at all, right?”

“If you’re up for it. Apparently, this agent has been very elusive so we are guessing she was of high priority or something.”

Bucky ran his hand through his hair, sighing. He hated staring into the faces of those who worked for HYDRA, those that tortured and manipulated him. Most of the people they had him look at, he did not recognize. Which did not surprise him. HYDRA was careful who was around when they let the Winter Soldier loose. Yet looking up he could see the poorly concealed hope in Steve’s eyes. He hated disappointing him; the blond punk had done so much for him these past two years that he had been living at the Tower. It had been three years since the destruction of the helicarriers and his and Steve’s fight over the Potomac. So much had changed since then.

“Fine. Let me finish my coffee and change.”

“Thanks, Buck. I’m going to shower quick then I’ll find you. Oh, Sam is coming back today and said he needs a guys’ night of billiards and beer after this family reunion he went to.”

“Birdbrain is always complaining about something.”

“Be nice, jerk.”

“Punk.”

Steve chuckled as he headed back to his room. Bucky felt a faint smile on his lips, it felt good to joke with Steve again. He was nowhere near as laid back as he vaguely remembered being before the war, but he was better than when Steve first found him in a homeless shelter in Toronto. His memories were coming back in bits and pieces and he finally was seeing a therapist. It was slow, agonizing work that made him want to bash his head against a wall frequently. Sometimes he wondered why he tried, if it was even worth it all. He would always have blood on his hands. He was Frankenstein’s monster. His nightmares liked to remind him of that.

Quickly draining the rest of his coffee, he put the mug in the dishwasher and headed to his room to change. It was only just after six am. With that thought and hearing this HYDRA agent had been picked up sometime in the night and already interrogated by Director Fury…hopefully the agent would be tired and make a mistake. He doubted this agent would be different than any of the other agents SHIELD had found recently. Just another useless agent wasting oxygen who would be better off with a bullet through the brain.

  Chapter 2

 Bucky followed behind Steve as they walked down one of the umpteen hallways in the Stark Tower, supposedly Avengers Tower now. They passed several SHIELD agents, a few dressed in full tactical gear, coming and going from various rooms. No one stood in their way as the two super soldiers moved swiftly towards Interrogation Room 3B. A few dared to greet Captain America who only received a nod in return, none even made an attempt at the former Winter Soldier. Not that he cared. He kept a cold mask of indifference on as they moved. He wore his favorite black tactical pants, shirt and boots, along with an unspecified number of knives hidden and visible on his hulking form. Steve wore his Captain America uniform sans the mask and shield.

He stopped outside a door and looked over his shoulder. “Ready?”

Bucky just grunted, ready to get this over with and go pound some sand bags in the gym.

Opening the door, they entered to a room full of screens along one wall and the opposite wall, a one-way window into the interrogation room. Two other agents were in the room, two betas by their scent, focusing intently on the screens their faces were plastered to and fingers moving rapidly over keyboards before them. The only other alpha moved from leaning against the wall having been staring through the window to address the super soldiers.

“Took you long enough.” Natasha quipped, eyeing them both. Her normal pine scent with hints of gunpowder came off stronger, almost pungent. Bucky wondered what made her so angry for her pheromones to be coming off so strong. It was most unlike her.

“Any updates?” Steve asked, moving to look through the window, already switching mentally to Captain mode.

She shook her head, red hair dancing around her shoulders. “Still not talking or moving. She might actually be a challenge. Information we can find about her is sparse at best. We got lucky that she cut herself while resisting us. We used the spilled blood for a DNA test. It only came back 65% conclusive but Fury is sure she is the right girl.”

“Ok.” He nodded then glanced at Bucky. “Anything?”

Slowly, Bucky moved to look through the window. A young woman sat stoically in the metal chair, hands in her lap, head bowed forward. Her short, black hair covered her face; he doubted even the ends touched her shoulders. Even though it was only a side profile of her, it was unmistakable to see she was curvy in all the right places. Dark wash jeans covered her legs while a black tank top with some kind of writing on the front were the only things he wore. Her feet were bare and no jewelry could be seen. She was certainly not what he expected to see. Yet sometimes beauty masked the worst evil.

“No, but I can’t really see her face.”

“Right. Nat, want to go in together?” Steve asked, placing his hands on his hips.

“Good cop, bad cop?” Natasha winked, walking past to head out. Steve clapped a hand on Bucky’s shoulder as he followed Natasha out of the room, back into the hallway and into the interrogation room.

Moving closer to the window, he crossed his arms over his chest to watch the interrogation. He ignored the faint murmuring of the two betas behind him as the sound of Steve’s voice came through the speaker overhead.

With the entrance of Captain America and the Black Widow, the woman raised her head slowly to stare at them. Natasha took a seat across from her while Steve stood upright talking. He told her about their hunt for anyone associated with HYDRA and how she could help stop the terror and tyranny inflicted by the organization. If she spoke truthfully and told them everything she knew, they would be able to work with the judge on a lesser sentence and keep her from a maximum-security prison or even a death sentence. Bucky scoffed internally at the offer; HYDRA chose death over failure. True, a few of the doctors and researchers they had apprehended had spilled all of their secrets but once they reached their prison…Bucky doubted they lived long. Most agents just killed themselves or, like her, kept silent. He would give it to her though; her side profile conveyed a simple beauty that in his younger days, he would have been attracted too.

As if his thought summoned her, her head whipped around to face the window even thought he knew she could not see through. What he saw made his heart stop and breathing cease. Those eyes. Those eyes haunted his dreams. Full, round eyes the color of dark brown or onyx stared at him. Eyes that were innocent and frightened in his dreams, now were as hard and unbreakable as his metal arm. After a long second she turned her face back to her interrogators and air returned to the super soldier’s lungs. Pieces of memories fell into place, as if her face was the key to unlocking them. Those soft, pink, bowlike lips over a short, button nose in her round face…except something was wrong. Her hair…it was the wrong color. It was supposed to be long, and a honey brown. It was always braided down her back. He continued to stare, memories conflicting with that his eyes saw before him. There was the long scar on her upper arm that he remembered…something about a tree? Another on her collarbone, like someone tried to cut her throat but missed. The memory was faint but anger burned within him instantly. He had not been able to protect her. Like he promised. No one was allowed to touch her. That’s what they said. She was his. That’s what his handler said.

Suddenly his eyes refocused on the scene before him. Natasha had moved with the silent grace of a panther to pounce on the woman. She gripped the hair on the back of the woman’s head and forced her head up to meet her own green eyes as she stood over her, glaring down. It was harsh but nothing Bucky had not seen Natasha do before, or even worse. Yet the hiss that escaped the dark-haired woman made his blood boil. Before his rational mind could keep up, his body instinctively moved out of the room into the hallway. He flung open the door into the interrogation room. Out of the corner of his eye, he saw a startled look on Steve’s face but he ignored it. His eyes were solely focused on the Black Widow.

“Let go of her.” He hissed out, planting his feet, ready for a fight. His scent probably reeked of rotting driftwood or something similar. He could almost feel it pouring off him along with his anger.

Not moving a muscle, Natasha just stared him down, her own anger bubbling up slightly at another alpha demanding of her.

“Buck…” Steve tried to placate, sensing the impending fight but Bucky interrupted him, not taking his eyes off the threat.

“TAKE YOUR HANDS OFF MY OMEGA!” He roared, allowing all his alpha instincts and Winter Soldier to enhance his roar.

The force of his voice and dominance caused Natasha to release the woman and step back, only to get into her own aggressive stance. They both may be alphas but Bucky was bigger, stronger and enraged right now. Glaring at an angered Natasha and a confused Steve, he finally turned his gaze to the woman…his woman…his omega.

Her round eyes stared at him like two dark moons, her mouth slightly open. “Soldat?...Mon ange noir?”

Even though her words came out on a whisper of breath, it resounded in the room like a gunshot. Immediately Bucky moved closer…or was it the Winter Soldier? The distinction between the two felt blurred at the moment.

“It cannot be…they said…they said you were dead.” She stuttered out as she watched him move closer. Was that tears in her eyes? He swore they looked watery but a slow blink cleared away whatever he thought was there. He remembered her scent being floral and sweet…something that soothed him…his mind struggled for the word. Jasmine. She always smelled like jasmine. Now though it was dulled as if on suppressants and the tang of alcohol seeped out of her clothes and skin.

He hovered over her, looking down at her upturned face. There was a name he called her. Memories collided in his mind, both providing answers and causing more questions to pop up. She called him…mon ange nior…my dark angel…she had been learning French. He saved her. Blood on the floor. A beating after but it was worth it. She was his omega. What did he call her? Not just omega. There was a name whispered in the dark, tears on her cheeks. A forbidden truth she was forced to forget.

Moving slowly, he reached out a hand and ran his thumb over her cheek as the word on the tip of his tongue slipped out. “Jenna.”

Chapter 3 

Hearing him say her name, a flood of emotions overwhelmed her. All she could do was stare at the man standing in front of her. They lied to her. They said he was dead, that he died during the destruction of the Triskelion. She mourned him in her own way but she never forgot him. His brown hair was long but looked clean compared to prior times she had seen him. She could not help but wonder who cut his hair now. It was stupid to think about, she had been the only one he allowed without fighting the guards. Now his eyes were clear, staring at her in a way like he never had before. Those blue/gray eyes bored into her and she suppressed a shiver. His alpha scent though, it made her want to bare her neck and wholly submit, to let him protect her again without question. It was stronger now, lacking the disturbing smells of dirt, blood, sweat and disinfectant. Now it was pure, unadulterated him. It reminded her of standing on the edge of the ocean, the fresh, salty air wrapping around her along with the wet sand between her toes. For years that faint scent had let her know she was safe again, at least for a time.

“How?” She reached forward and touched his metal hand, making sure he was real, that this was not a dream.

Before he could answer, the door swung open behind him with a bang. In that split second the super soldier ripped her out of the chair and tossed her roughly into the closest corner. She managed to catch herself on the wall before smacking it with her forehead. Turning quickly around, the sight that greeted her made her stomach drop. Her soldier faced outward, blocking her with his body, a long knife in each hand. A deep growl erupted out of his throat. Words nor pheromones were needed to translate the message he was sending. Just inside the door now stood the Iron Man in a full suit, hands raised, ready to fire. Behind him stood the first man to interrogate her, Director Fury.

“You know, Cap, I feel a little left out that we weren’t invited to the party.” The voice of Tony Stark emitted out of the suit.

Moving past Tony Stark, the man who alluded justice and ruthlessness glared at everyone in the room like an enraged schoolmaster. “Someone care to explain what the hell is going on here?”

The air hung thick with tension as the showdown continued. No one was moving and no one was speaking. Her mind struggled with everything that had happened in the last five minutes and what the repercussions would be... There was one thing she knew. Her soldier would protect her. Her alpha always looked out for her and there was one last thing he could do…but it meant she had to speak. Her secrets would only kill her last hope now.

“Director Fury,” she spoke up as all eyes swung over to her besides her protector’s, whom only stiffened at her voice cutting through the air, “I will freely talk on the promise my one condition is met.”

“What is it?”

“Your men stand down and his actions will not be held against him.” She finished, placing a hand on the back just in front of her so her meaning was clear.

The single, focused eye turned to the man guarding her. “Will you stand down, Sergeant Barnes and allow her to speak with us?”

Hesitantly he glanced behind him and at her nod responded. “As long as no one touches her and I remain where she is.”

“Fine. Goddammit. This is turning into a bigger mess than I thought. As you two are calling the shots, care to talk here or do we need a penthouse with gold gilding and chandeliers?” Fury barked out, his peppermint scent coming off in strong waves with a mixture of rotting plants.

She moved to stand by the soldier’s side. “Do you have somewhere secure? No recordings, no way for information of who I am to get out?”

“Conference room? JARVIS can shut everything down.” Captain America spoke up, seeming to slowly come out of his shock.

Fury heavily sighed. “Everyone be there in five minutes. Cap, Romanov, don’t let her out of your sight.” With that he strode out of the room, his coat a dark cloud billowing behind him.

The Black Widow shifted, hands still tense by her sides. “Alright, let’s go, Agent 72.”

“Don’t call her that!” Her solider demanded, eyes sweeping the room for seen and unseen threats.

“It’s ok.” Jenna placed a hand on his arm and felt a bit of the tension ease out of his muscles.

Captain America watched them seeming unsure if he should jump into the fray or continue to stay on the sidelines. “Buck, can you put those away?” He gestured towards the knives still dangerously held out.

The ex-Winter Soldier seemed to think about the request for a long moment, as if debating the need for them in the near future. Slowly he placed the long knives back in their sheaths strapped to his thighs. Soon the group exited and started down a different hallway. The Black Widow walked in front with the Iron Man and Captain America behind. One thing kept running through Jenna’s mind as they walked. Director Fury had called him ‘Sergeant Barnes’ and Captain America called him ‘Buck’. Was that his real name? She had only ever heard him referred to as Soldat, the Soldier, or the Asset. Finally, she decided she had nothing to lose at this point.

Glancing up at the man walking stiffly beside her, she asked her strange question. “So, your name is Sergeant Barnes?”

A twitch of his lips accompanied the warmth in his eyes as he met her eyes for a moment. “James Barnes.”

“Huh. Never would have pegged you for a James.”

A snort sounded from behind them that she guessed came from the Captain. The man beside her…James, James Barnes, mock glared at her. The lightheartness of the moment vanished when the Iron Man spoke up.

“What? He goes into full Winter Solider mode to protect you and you don’t even know his name? Who the hell are you, girl?”

In an instant, James placed himself between the man of iron and her, tension thick once again and his hands twitching to grab a knife.

Thankfully the Captain broke up the impending fight by stepping between the two. “Tony, why don’t you go ahead and make sure the room is ready. Buck, stand down.”

With an unintelligent muttering, the Iron Man stormed around them but it was not until he turned down another hallway that James relaxed marginally.

“Omega…” James looked down at her.

“I’m fine. Let’s get this done.” She turned and started following the direction the Iron Man had disappeared. She could hear a huff and footsteps following but paid no attention, keeping her eyes on the red head leading the way. It bothered her the truth that rang through the man’s words. She had not known James’ name yet he was willing to fight and protect her. He even remembered her name. It made her feel like shit, was she taking advantage of him? Did he actually want to help her? She could not think too much more about that. There was one thing she needed from him. So, she would spill all her secrets, defying years of training and experience. Hopefully this did not come to bite her in the ass later. Not like she had much choice now.

 The conference room had a large oval table in the center with twelve chairs around it. Along all the walls were screens in which things could easily be projected upon. Against one of the walls was a short table with a Keurig coffeemaker, paper cups, and condiments for the coffee. Even though it was sparse, clearly this room was used a lot, or at least no one had come to take the overflowing trash can under the small coffee table. On one of the screens, the time was written in white, stating it was almost a quarter to seven in the morning. Jenna rubbed her eyes with the heels of her hands. It had been a long night at the bar she worked at, some college frat boys were making her night miserable. Walking to the train stop, she was exhausted and ready to crash for a few hours before having to go to her second job. Suddenly a van was pulling up next to her and someone threw a black bag over her head. She hoped those waiting for her were alright. No, she could not think about them right now. She had to focus on this meeting.

She took a seat towards the middle of the table and closed her eyes, focusing on her breathing. Whispering could be heard close to the door but she tried her best to ignore it. Keeping her hands clasped in her lap under the table, she tried to suppress the trembling in them. Never before had she talked about what she went through, what had happened to her. She barely had time to reflect on it herself, only in her dreams and nightmares did her mind decide to even remember it.

The door opened again and she knew it was time. Fury walked in, in his wake was a tall woman with a stern face and posture that suggested military. The scent of fresh bread came off of her so Jenna knew she was a beta. A different man came in last, closing the door behind him. He was dressed casual compared to everyone else but streaks of dirt and dust were on his white t-shirt and a few marks on his thick arms. His beta scent caught her off guard, like freshly grated ginger which made her think of making her favorite stir fry at home. Who were these people? She did not get a chance to find out since Fury took a seat directly across from hers and his eye bored into her soul demanding answers.

“Alright, Miss Lewis, here we are.” He leaned forward in the chair. “Why don’t you start from the beginning? How and why you were recruited by HYDRA then we’ll go from there.”

Everyone else settled around the room either taking seats around the table or leaning against the walls. The Iron Man stepped out of his suit and took a seat at the head of the table, kicking his feet up. The stern woman stood behind Fury, leaning against the wall with her arms crossed. The scent of coastal waters and warm sunshine grew stronger and she sensed James take the seat next to her. She did not turn her head nor acknowledge his presence but internally she was grateful for his close proximity. She wondered how much of what she was about to share if he knew or it would come as a surprise to him too.

“My name is Jenna Lewis and there was only one reason HYDRA ‘recruited’ me as you keep stating. Its cause of what I am. I found out later but at the time they were trying a new…experiment, if you want to call it that. They kidnapped me when I was nineteen, walking back to my college dorm from a party. They gave me a number like a lab rat, instead of using my name. That’s where Agent 72 comes from. I…I wasn’t the only omega they took…”

“Wait! You’re an omega? You don’t smell like one.” Tony interrupted.

“Suppressants for years, it’s safer to pretend to be a beta then an unclaimed omega.” She retorted, surprised she had to explain that to someone who was supposed to be a genius. She hesitated to talk about the next part, unsure how the man next to her would handle it.

Fury broke the pregnant pause. “Why were they taking omegas?”

“They…shit,” she sighed before rushing out the next part. “They apparently were having issues controlling their asset. The doctors controlling his biology were saying how an alpha unable to go through a rut after sixty years could be harder to control and by giving him…a plaything…it would help them control him. So, they took omegas to satisfy the alpha’s natural urges.”

From beside her, soft, pained Russian was mumbled that if she took a guess was some vibrant cursing.

“Sex slaves. You’re telling me HYDRA took you as a sex slave.” Fury pinched the bridge of his nose.

She raised an eyebrow. “Are you really surprised?”

“What about the others?” The Captain asked, moving closer to the table but seemed hesitant to hear the answer. “Where are the other omegas?”

There was no kind way to answer that question. “Dead. Either they were killed by the asset or after he rejected them, they were given to the HYDRA guards. I never saw them again.”

With that, James pushed his chair back and shot up, retreating to a corner of the room to furiously pace. Her heart broke for him, she doubted this was something he wanted to hear.

“And somehow you survived…how?” Fury continued, keeping his eye on her.

“I guess I smelled right to him.”

“How long?”

Surprised by James’ raspy voice, she turned to look at him. He looked ready to tear his own heart out to take away her pain, his eyes tortured and fists clenching and unclenching.

He repeated his question, enunciating each word as if it was acid in his mouth. “How long…were you my…” His words faltered at the end.

“Four years.”

He balked, blood draining from his face. A gasp come from direction of the Captain. Even Tony’s face looked a little paler.

“I managed to escape after the fight at the Triskelion, everything was in such disarray, no one knew what was going on. I’ve been running ever since.”

“That’s three years ago.” Fury spoke up, his tone still harsh but no longer glaring at her. She guessed he believed her, at least somewhat. “How have you managed to evade them for so long?”

“I don’t stay in the same place longer than eight months usually. I thought I actually noticed someone following me two days ago. So, after the weekend I was going to move on. Besides, without their asset there’s no point to keeping me.”

The air was strained, everyone absorbing her words and their implications. She could hear James’ rapid breathing to her left and the Captain’s continued, concerned looks thrown his way.

The Black Widow’s voice rang out, indifferent to the range of emotions displayed in the room. “In the few documents with your…number on it. There were mentions of something about a ‘carrier’ or ‘bad breeder’.”

“Shit.” Jenna whispered, rubbing her hands on her face. This was the one topic she had hoped to not have to explain. Where had they gotten this information? “I got pregnant at one point…they decided to experiment and see what would happen with breeding. I lost…they thought it had something to do with the serum. It didn’t help where they kept us wasn’t ideal for growing pups up healthy.”

“It just happened once?”

She answered the Widow’s follow up question hesitantly. “Twice. I miscarried twice.”

A sudden pounding sound shook the room causing everyone to jump and look at James. Ruthlessly he pounded against the wall beside him with his metal arm. Glass shattered. Pieces fell to the floor under the brutal treatment. Jenna froze, the sudden emotion keeping her eyes glued. The four years she had known the Winter Soldier, only twice had she seen him lose control like this but never was it directed at her. Normally he was stoic and unemotional or just on the brink of tenderness but never fully crossing that threshold. This…she was unsure what to do.

The Captain immediately rushed over, trying to pacify and calm his friend. After several tense minutes, James finally turned to face the group but his blue/gray eyes pinned her to her seat. His chest still rose and fell rapidly but what surprised her the most was the unshed tears betraying his pain hidden in those eyes.

“I’m so sorry.”

“No…” she tried to interrupt but he kept speaking, gripping his hair like he was ready to yank it all out.

“I can’t…I’ll kill them all, I swear, I’m so sorry. I’ll protect you…”

“STOP!” Jenna jumped up and moved closer to the devastated man, ignoring everyone else in the room. Roughly she grabbed his face as he tried to turn away from her. “Look at me!” She commanded. Once his eyes met hers again did she continue, her voice more confident than she felt. “Its not your fault. We were both prisoners…and you did protect me. Do you remember? Once after a certain guard…hurt me because you weren’t around, somehow you knew. You found him and killed him. You promised to keep me safe and you did. After that, all the guards were scared to touch me because they knew. They knew I was YOUR omega! You never hurt me on purpose. You kept me alive. None of this was your fault. You never asked for this. Neither did I yet we dealt with it and survived. Focus on that. They did not break us…and every day we get up and keep breathing, we are beating them. Ok?”

He nodded, placing his hands on her forearms and pressing their foreheads together. A warm tingle ran through her as memories come to the forefront of her mind. Occasionally he would do this when they were alone in their cell. When they both desperately needed positive human contact…when it had been awhile since his last mind wipe and memories were coming back. They would cling to one another like two drowning persons in a storm. Desperately hoping the storm would abate soon or they would drown and death would save them.

“Well this truly is touching but what happens now?” Tony’s question broke the silent moment causing everything to come crashing back to reality.

  Chapter 4

 Bucky kept her close, wanting…no needing her touch, her warmth. Her jasmine scent brought such a peace with it. Yet his alpha instincts could not be ignored. Everything in him screamed to keep her near and safe. She was his omega and he would fight for her and to keep her. Damn anyone that tried to stand in his way. Everything she had confessed, everything she had been through made him want to rip every HYDRA agent apart with his bare hands. He knew HYDRA consisted of monsters but this…this was a new depravity that surprised him. He had no memories of the prior omegas. There was only one his mind recalled. Once he caught her scent, memories of them came flooding back... Laying on the uncomfortable cot together, her brushing and cutting his hair, tracing her skin as she slept. What stood out was the night he claimed her, he left his mating mark on her and she moaned in pleasure. He wondered if it was still there, it had been years…he had not noticed anything and guessed it had faded by now. That thought bothered him more than he cared to admit.

“Well it would appear there is only one thing we can do now.” Fury said. With his words Jenna turned around to face the SHIELD director, she took a couple steps closer to the table, back ramrod straight. A soft clap on the shoulder reminded Bucky that Steve still stood nearby, silently supporting him. Like always.

Fury’s eye roved over Jenna then Bucky before returning to her. “Miss Lewis, you will be placed in SHIELD custody for your protection until a time is deemed you no longer are in need of it. You will be placed in an undisclosed location for now. While in custody, you will try and help identify any HYDRA agents, doctors, or researchers that you can recall.”

The plan made sense but it did not mean Bucky had to like it. He wanted nothing more than to keep her by his side. Perhaps he could convince Fury to let him be a part of her protection detail. Its not like he was doing much else in the Tower. Hell, Steve would probably be the only one to miss him.

“Thank you, sir but I respectfully decline your offer.”

Bucky whipped his head around to stare at her. What was she thinking? His heart began beating rapidly, fear flooding his veins. What was she doing?

Fury’s voice practically dripped shards of ice as he countered her. “Oh, is that so? Miss, I don’t think you have much of a choice in the matter. It was not an offer. This is happening.”

She took a step closer to the table. “If I stay with you, HYDRA will find out about me. If I continue on my own, its easier to hide, easier to escape notice. I gave you the information you asked for and now I will be walking out those doors. You have no real reason to keep me.”

“We need to confirm your story.”

“Do it but I’m leaving…and I will disappear so if there are any last questions, you better ask them now.”

Maybe another time he would be impressed by an omega standing up to an alpha, especially Fury without quaking in their shoes. Now, it felt like he was losing her.

“Jenna,” he pleaded, “you need to stay here. Its not safe for you to leave. What if HYDRA finds you?”

“What are they going to do with me? Why would they even really be looking for me? I’m nothing to them.”

“NO! You will stay here and I will protect you.” He used his alpha voice on her, his growl reverberating in the room. This was not how he wanted things to go. Hell, he just found her and she wanted to just run off and vanish. That wasn’t going to happen. He had four years’ worth of transgressions to make up to her.

Her body tensed, hands clenching into fists as she fought the submission her body screamed for. After several deep breaths, she turned fully to face him. What warmth they once held for him dispersed as flares of anger danced in her onyx eyes. “You have no right to demand of me. Once you were my alpha but no more.”

A dagger to the heart would have hurt less. Why was she fighting this so hard? He heard Steve shift next to him and begin to say something but clamped his mouth shut when Jenna leveled a glare at him.

“I have a question.” Natasha announced, taking a step closer and planting her hands on her hips. “JARVIS, open file MP103572-26355A and project it onto screen 2B.” A half second later, her famous Widow’s smirk appeared as she stared at Jenna. “Who is their father?”

On the screen was a surveillance picture of Jenna smiling as she walked by a swing set. What struck Bucky speechless were the toddlers holding her hands. One of them, a boy, had dark brown hair like he did while the other, a girl, had hair slightly lighter, closer to their mother’s natural honey brown hair. The girl carried a dandelion in her hand, showing it off like it was the greatest treasure. The boy looked down, concentrating on cracks in the pavement under his feet.  The innocence that radiated off them was palpable through the picture.  It felt like all the air had been sucked from his lungs. Turning his head, he looked at Jenna for an explanation.

All the color had drained from her face as she stared at the picture.

“See if my calculations are correct…they look over 2 years old. Its been three years since the fall of HYDRA. So that tells me when you escaped, if that’s really what happened, you were already pregnant. You keep claiming that only Sergeant Barnes was allowed to touch you so it makes me wonder. Why have you not mentioned them yet?”

His thoughts were flying by at a million miles per minute yet also sluggishly refusing to move. His super soldier brain could usually process information faster than the average person but not this. He needed to hear it from her mouth. He needed the truth.

“Jenna…” He moved closer until he stood over her. Tears welled in her eyes, shoulders sagged, she looked utterly defeated. “Please.”

“I won’t let them touch my pups. I’ll do whatever I have to but I refuse to let those monsters anywhere close to my babies.” She hissed out, a last reserve of strength.

“Please tell me…are they…” He could not even finish his question, both hope and fear fighting for dominance within him. The revelation that he could be a father crashed into him like a tidal wave. It was a dream he had before the war, settling down and starting a family with his sweet wife. Once HYDRA got their hands on him, that dream went up in smoke. It never occurred to him that it could still happen.

She blinked before whispering the answer.“Yes, they are your pups.”

“That’s why you’ve been running and hiding. Not for your own safety but for them.” Steve beckoned to the screen, his own shock evident.

“Hold on. Hold on.” Tony interrupted. “Why would HYDRA want the pups? Aren’t they about world domination and soldiers, not babysitters?”

Natasha answered this time. “They are part super soldier. It’s the breeding program, right? Why waste time creating an unstable serum when you can create and mold the soldiers from birth?”

Bucky wanted to vomit at the thought. Those same doctors that tortured him…touching his pups, forcing them to be mindless, emotionless killers, hurting them until the doctors received the result they wanted. He would not, could not let anything happen to them. He would sell his soul to keep them safe. He looked up at the picture again, studying it. They looked beautiful, his omega, his pups…his family. The desperate need to see them, meet them, touch them and confirm they were real overwhelmed him. He had to make her understand somehow. He needed this. He needed to see them with his own eyes. He was a father.

“Can I meet them?” He tried to keep his voice soft as Tony and Natasha were arguing about something.

She looked up, meeting his eyes, scrutinizing him as if confirming his genuine feelings. “Ok,” she whispered back.

“When? Today?”

She shook her head. “I’m already late to return home. My emergency protocols will be active. I need to sort it out first.”

“Tomorrow?” He could barely keep the desperation out of his voice. “You can have time to think about staying, let me...us protect you. You don’t have to be all on your own anymore. I swear I won’t let HYDRA anywhere near the three of you. I’ll die before they touch you.”

A sad smile touched her lips. “I believe you. We can meet tomorrow. I don’t know about…”

“Please, just think about it.”

She sighed. “Fine, ok. I’ll think about it.”

“Thank you, omega.”

“Don’t call me that. We may have been together once but we aren’t right now.”

“Buck and I can walk you out, Miss Lewis.” Steve said, clearly having heard their whispered conversation.

“Thank you, Captain.”

“Fury, Buck and I are escorting Miss Lewis out. A rendezvous meeting has been set for tomorrow in which further plans will be discussed but right now she needs to return to her pups.” Steve stated, his voice ringing with authority.

Fury looked between the three of them with obvious mistrust and skepticism. “Miss Lewis, we are not done talking. An undercover detail will be sent to monitor your home.”

Pinching her lips together, Jenna gave a curt nod before following Steve out the room with Bucky following. Their walk was silent, even the elevator was endured with minimal speech. Bucky would give anything to know what was going through her mind. Her face was expressionless, a mask that frustrated him. His own mind whirled with the new revelation. He had pups. He was a father. With an beautiful omega who clearly, at least at one time, cared for him. He wanted to know more about them, what they liked, their favorite games and movies. Did they know their father was alive? His lips stayed shut even as the questions burned on his tongue. A frigidness had wrapped around Jenna and it felt impenetrable. Having her life exposed as it had been to strangers and ones initially claiming she was HYDRA, he could not think how she felt right now. A piece of him wished to reach out and touch her, comfort her in some way. Her lovely scent had begun to slowly sour, alerting him to her negative change of emotion. It felt like his hands were tied though. What could he offer her? Would she even want to receive his help? Did she want anything from him?

Once they reached the ground floor, the three said a short, awkward farewell before she turned on her heel and practically ran away.

“We’ll figure it out, Buck.”

“I can’t lose them, Steve…I just can’t….”

“I know. That’s my nephew and niece. We’ll keep them safe.”

Bucky could only nod as he followed Steve back to the elevator. He hoped Jenna would allow them to help protect her and the pups. They needed to be safe. There was not another option. He needed them safe and happy.

  Chapter 5

 She remembered the first time she met the Winter Soldier, when she had been given to him. They ripped the black bag off her head as they walked down a concrete hallway. The place felt like an underground bunker or something. Goosebumps broke out on her skin from the cold, she was still only clad in the stupid university t-shirt and jean shorts that she had worn to the frat party. Her honey brown hair hung loose and limp past her shoulders as she stumbled along. For some ridiculous reason they had taken her flats so the cold floor hurt her feet. Whenever she spoke or asked a question, one of the two men gripping her arms would hit or slap her. So silently she followed along.

They passed several metal doors before stopping at one. There was nothing unique about it, nothing to show why they were stopping there. One of her handlers called out something in a foreign language than a green light buzzed over the door. Quickly they dragged her through the doorframe before unceremoniously tossing her further into the room. Stumbling she caught herself falling on her hands and knees. A harsh clank behind her signaled the door was sealed shut leaving her alone…or so she thought.

A creaking made her head swivel to the side to identify the sound. To her surprise and horror, a man sat on a dirty looking cot. His long, dark brown hair hid his face so her eyes quickly scanned the rest of him. He looked fit, like really fit, if the protruding muscles said anything. What caught her off guard the most was his left arm was not flesh and blood but shiny and metal. Her mind did not have long to ponder the question for just as suddenly as he appeared, his head lifted. A pair of beautiful blue/gray eyes met hers that she would have immediately loved except they looked almost dead or void of emotion. A sharp jawline accentuated his plump lips which were pressed together. His nostrils flared quickly then he seemed to take a deep breath. It was then his scent hit her. He was an alpha! Stories of unspeakable horrors crossed her mind and she felt tears threatening to fall. Questions flooded her mind but her tongue refused to cooperate.

Slowly and silently he stood up, moving with an almost machine-like grace. Unsure what to do she scrambled onto her feet, breathing rapidly, moving to press her back against the wall. Her eyes remained transfixed on him. As if each movement took great deliberation, he slowly moved closer step by step. His eyes held her frozen in place. He was easily eight inches taller with muscles and movement that conveyed he knew how to handle himself. What could she do expect hope and pray? She was smart enough to know she would not win a fight against him. What did he want from her? Why was she here? Who was he?

After what felt like an eternity, he stood toe to toe with her, towering and intimidating. Her heart felt like it was ready to beat out of her chest. Sweat beaded on her palms. Agonizingly slow, he leaned forward moving his head closer and closer to her. With a whimper she tried to jerk away but to no avail. He forced her back against the wall. His metal hand gently yet forcefully pressed on her head, tilting it to the side so she was looking away. She felt him continue to lean in closer until his nose was pressed against her mating gland. Closing her eyes, a tear slipped out but she held still. A sound, the mixture between a moan and growl erupted from his lips ghosting over the skin of her neck. Gently he gripped her chin and forced her to meet his gaze once again. This time there seemed to be a spark amongst the deadness, a glimmer of something she could not decipher. He stared at her a long time as if absorbing everything about her and all her secrets. It unnerved her but so far, he had not done anything to hurt her yet, that had to be good, right?

To make their strange situation even more bizarre, his thumb brushed over her lower lip, then hesitantly touched his own lip with the thumb that had touched her. Whatever it was must have sealed the decision he was contemplating for suddenly he leaned forward again and pressed his nose against her mating gland.

“Mine…” His voice rasped out as if unused to speaking. “My omega.” He leaned back, staring at her. “Confirm.”

“Wh…what?” She stuttered out, confused by the crazy events.

“Confirm. My omega. Confirm.”

“Um…I’m…I’m your omega?”

“Affirmative.” With that he released her and walked back over to sit on the dirty cot.

She watched him sit there, barely moving or breathing for several moments before sliding onto the floor beneath her. She pulled her legs up against her chest and wrapped her arms around them. Tears silently fell but she dared not make a sound. What was going on?

 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Jenna was nervous. Shit, she was scared. This felt right though. After everything that happened yesterday at the Avengers Tower, how she just wanted to grab the twins and run for dear life. Yet with everything, she felt she owed it to him at least. He had protected her while they were both prisoners of HYDRA, even yesterday he still threw himself between her and whatever he deemed threatened her. He deserved to meet his pups, his son and daughter. So here they were.

“Park! We play!” Her daughter cried out excitedly, tugging on Jenna’s hand now in her great enthusiasm.

“Hold on, sweetheart, we’re going. We don’t want to fall and scrape our knees again, right?”

“No, mama.”

They rounded the last bend on the sidewalk to reach the entrance of the enclosed neighborhood park. Living in the Bronx had its shady times certainly and Jenna always kept a firm grip and sharp eye on her children. Luckily there had not been any incidents at this park. As they entered, her eyes scanned around for a particular face and within moments locked eyes.

“Mama, play!”

“One second, I want you two to meet someone.” She guided her children towards them. James stood frozen, almost mid-step as if he had been pacing and then saw her. Steve sat on the park bench next to him along with a dark-skinned man she did not recognize. Taking a deep breath, she steeled herself as they walked the last few feet.

“Nuggets, this is my friend James. Can you say hi?” She spoke soothingly, as she stopped them in front of the ex-Winter Soldier. Her daughter waved, dimples appearing on her cheeks while her son stood staring, clinging to her hand. James’ eyes bounced continuously back and forth between the two and she knew he was noticing his own features in them. Her daughter had matching blue/gray eyes, identical to his. Her son had the same dimple in his chin while his eyes were more of a light blue. They both had Jenna’s lighter complexion but looking at them, it was easy to pick out similarities between their parents. Both a blessing and a curse that she had struggled with.

“James, this is Sierra and Aiden.”

Slowly he knelt before them, never removing his eyes from the three of them. “Hi, its…” he swallowed before continuing, “its nice to meet you two.”

“Alright, nuggets, why don’t you go play. I’m just going to talk to James for a bit.”

“Play!” Sierra chirped in her sweet voice. Without waiting another second, she darted towards the small playground and began running all over it. Aidan slowly followed but only to the edge, then he began driving the monster truck in his hand over the sandy ground contently. Jenna watched them for a moment, her heart swelling with love for them. They truly were her world and she did not mind one bit.

“So, you’re Jenna, huh?” The dark-skinned man smirked at her before leaning forward, extending his hand. “Sam Wilson. Bucky was not kidding when he mentioned how beautiful you are.”

She laughed as Sam winked at her while they shook hands and James glowered at him. His scent reminded her of lemons and honey, an interesting combination for a male beta in her opinion. She could not help but feel relaxed in his presence which both made her nervous yet happy to chat and laugh casually.

“Its good to see you again, Jenna.”

“You too, Captain.”

“Please, call me Steve.”

She nodded at him then turned her attention to the real reason she was here. James stared at the toddlers like a blind man seeing the moon and stars for the first time. It was both sweet and heartbreaking to witness. “You ok?”

“They are perfect.” He breathed out, not tearing his eyes from them.

She continued to watch him, seeing the misty eyes and silent disbelief at what his eyes were telling him. This world, HYDRA, had taken so much from him, forced him to be something he never wanted to be. Trapped in his own mind and body as they controlled him through torture and pain. She witness it. Yet there was a softness she had never seen before. It was in the small smile touching his lips as Sierra slid down the slide squealing and Aidan made ‘vroom’ noises for his truck. Was it possible for her pups to grow up with father after all? That was a dream she had given up long ago but watching him…could it be possible?

“So, did you make a decision yet?” Steve broke the silence.

“What?”

“If…if you’ll come back with us…or not?”

At her hesitation, James’ head turned to stare at her, an almost pained expression on his face.

“I’m not…”

“Please.” He interrupted her, moving closer and gripping her upper arms. “Please don’t run. I just found you…and them. I can’t, I can’t lose any of you. Please. Give us a chance.”

“You have to understand, its just been the three of us. They are my first priority and I will not compromise their safety in any way.”

“I promise, I won’t let anything happen to you or our…our pups. You don’t have to do this alone anymore.”

She would never admit it out loud but she spent most of the night last night sitting in the dark thinking, planning and strategizing. The idea of not having to look over her shoulder constantly called out to her. To not feel alone, to maybe find a sliver of peace and rest delighted her. Yet what if HYDRA still infected SHIELD? Could she be fully positive that those around had her and her children’s best interests at heart?

“Trust me, please.” He begged, tearing her heart out.

After an eternity or a second, she was unsure, she decided to make her choice. Meeting his pleading eyes, she nodded. “Ok, I trust you James Barnes to keep me and our pups safe. Don’t fail us.”

“I won’t. I promise.” He whispered, pressing their foreheads together. “Thank you.”

“After the kids play, we can go get our stuff. It won’t take too long. Would that work?”

“Sure, sure. Steve can call for a truck to come and pick up the stuff. Right, Stevie?”

“Course, Buck. I’ll call right now.” The blond super soldier jumped up and walked several paces away, pulling out his cell phone.

James and Jenna took a hesitant step from each other and she scanned the playground to check on the twins. Yes, she needed to keep an eye on them, especially Sierra, but really, she just needed space. His scent made her want to burrow her face in his neck, to let him hold her close and know he would protect them. She was not sure if it was because of her being an omega or their shared past history but she wanted to relinquish control. But she could not submit like that. Not right away. She needed proof to trust him, besides her and James were such different people then when they last saw one another. Would a relationship even work between them anymore? Would he be a good alpha and father? It felt too early to tell.

“Mama!”

Aidan running over broke her train of thought. He slammed into her legs then tugged on her hand. She smiled, already knowing what he wanted. His favorite part of the playground was the swings off to the side while Sierra could spend hours climbing up and going down the slide.

For the next fifteen minutes, she pushed Aidan and watched James play on the slide with Sierra. After that, the little girl somehow got Steve and Sam to chase her around while James sat on the ground with Aidan and made ramps in the sand for him to drive his monster truck off. Maybe there was hope for a family between them. Perhaps things she once dreamed of might finally come true. She looked on with hope and love growing in her heart.

  Chapter 6

 Bucky followed behind Jenna as they ascended the stairs, having to move slow because of the toddlers wanting to walk up by themselves. Aidan held his hand, his monster truck still in his other hand. The way the two toddlers had warmed up to him was astounding. To his own even greater surprise, neither one was frightened by his metal arm. It barely even phased either one, only Sierra had a reaction to it which equated to her frequently grabbing his metal hand to stare at her own reflection and giggle. Now they were heading up to their second-floor apartment to gather their stuff and taken them to the Tower. Sam stayed outside with the truck and to keep an eye on their surroundings.

When Bucky saw the apartment building, he was horrified and distraught that this was where they had been living. He understood it had to be hard to be a single mother, raising twins while having to stay off the grid but this. It brought a new revelation of how much she must struggle to get by and the sacrifices she had made. He promised himself to spoil all three of them anyway he could. He doubted he would be the only one spoiling the kids by the heart shaped eyes Steve had whenever the kids interacted with him.

Jenna opened the door and ushered the toddlers in first. Steve and Bucky followed scanning the place. It was a small one-bedroom apartment, the walls were a yellowed tan from age with bare minimum furniture. A raised eyebrow from Steve received a nod from Bucky. This reminded them both of their own poor childhoods. There was no way his family was allowed to continue to live like this. Not while he had he means to change it.

“Look! Me puppy!” Sierra ran up to the two men, showing them a brown stuffed animal with floppy ears.

“He’s really nice.” Steve smiled at the little girl. Aidan appeared next to show them his stuffed owl but a male voice made Bucky turn around.

Before Jenna could fully close the door, someone called out her name. She sighed and reopened it, plastering a fake smile on her lips.

“Hey, Paul.”

“Alicia. How are ya, babe?”

Every alpha instinct went on high alert as Bucky heard that. He watched the man, by his scent a weak alpha, rush over. The man leaned against the doorframe, a crooked smile greeting her. He was attractive enough- tall, thin, a nose looking like it had been broken at least once, while wearing a backwards baseball cap and jeans.

“I’m ok. You?”

“Yeah, good, good. Hey, think you’ll have an evening off soon? I still wanna take you to that joint down the street. I think you’d really like it. I’ll even pay for someone to watch your pups. Don’t give me that look, come on, you’ve been saying no for two months now. Its ok to let loose and have some fun.”

Bucky had heard enough by this point. In several swift strides, he approached, wrapping an arm around Jenna’s waist and tugged her into his side. “Hey doll face, we’re waiting on you. Who’s your friend here?”

“Oh, this is Paul. He lives two doors away. Paul, this is James.”

Paul’s eyebrows furrowed as the other alpha intruded on what he thought was his territory. It almost made Bucky smile as he watched Paul straighten up and puff his chest out. He posed no real threat at all. It was almost comical.

“Nice to meet you.” Paul winced slightly as he shook Bucky’s hand. “Um…how…are you friends?”

“I’m her alpha.” He stated bluntly, loving the way Paul’s eyes widened.

A sharp elbow to his ribs surprised and amused him. “No, you’re not.” Jenna retorted.

“Keep telling yourself that, doll.” He winked at the still stunned Paul. “She likes to play hard to get. Now, we need to finish packing. It was nice to meet you.” Without waiting for a response, he pulled Jenna inside and closed the door in Paul’s face.

“Was that really necessary?”

He smirked. “Did you want him to keep talking to you?”

“No…”

“You’re welcome then, beautiful. Now, put Steve and me to work.”

A wicked gleam came into her eyes. “Yes, alpha.”

A low growl emerged as he stepped closer. Unable to help himself anymore, he ran his nose along the shell of her ear and breathed in her heady, sweet scent that he would happily drown in. “Don’t start something you don’t mean, omega.”

A faint shudder coursed through her before she replied, slightly breathless. “Guess we’ll have to wait and see.”

Damn boundaries and waiting. He pressed a chaste kiss to her temple then stepped back, pleased to see the faintest blush on her cheeks. “What do we need to do?”

“There are suitcases on the bed that we will take. None of the furniture has to come with. Let me grab a trash bag and throw the toys in it. Should we bring the food or leave it?”

“Bring it. Each of the suites have a full kitchen in them.”

“Ok.” She called over to the twins playing on the floor with Steve. “Nuggets! Get your toys please and put them on the couch. We are having a sleepover and want to bring everything.”

Ten minutes later, Steve has the three suitcases and was heading downstairs. The twins had a small backpack on each, a few toys in them. Sam had come up and was helping the twins down the stairs while loudly singing ‘The Wheels on the Bus’ with them somewhat following along.

Bucky stood at the door waiting for Jenna, two car seats by his feet. He watched her scanning the small apartment. Seeming somewhat satisfied, she reached above the fridge and pulled down a pistol and case of bullets. She stared at the gun for along moment as if lost in thought. He was caught off-guard by her having a gun in her possession. He doubted it was legal. Would she feel it necessary to keep? Did she know how to use it? Then a dark thought entered wondering if she had been forced to use it to protect her and their pups. Silently Bucky moved over to stand in front of her.

“Come here.” Gently he took it from her, slipping it into the waistline of his pants. The bullets, he stuffed the small case into one of his pockets. Without warning, he stepped closer and wrapped his arms around her. He could nt imagine what al she had been through to take care of the twins and stay ahead of HYDRA. She stiffened in his arms.  Immediately he wondered if he made the wrong move. His thought had been to offer comfort but maybe she was not ready for that from him. Before he could pull back and apologize, her arms went around his waist and she placed her head on his chest.

“I’m scared.” She murmured.

“I know. I am too. Yesterday morning I woke up and didn’t know what I was doing at the Tower. If I should stay or leave. What I currently should do with my life. But now I have you and our pups in my life. I’ll never be good enough for you or them but I promise to damn well try and do everything I can to keep you safe and happy. You aren’t alone anymore, Jenna. Not if you don’t wanna be.”

“James…”

“Bucky.”

“What?”

He tilted her chin up to stare into those gorgeous onyx eyes. “I prefer Bucky.”

“I thought you preferred alpha.”

He growled, burrowing his face into her neck. Damn she smelled incredible and her body pressed against his felt perfect. Her giggle almost made him come undone along with her squirming. He nipped at the skin on her neck teasingly. “Omega, you are trouble.”

She pushed against his chest, a coy smile on her face. “I have no idea what you’re talking about.”

Reluctantly he released her and stepped back. “Anything else you need?”

“No, I think that’s it, alpha.”

He groaned, his instincts attempting to run wild at her calling him that. “Argh. We better get moving out of this apartment before I pin you against a wall.”

“One of these days, I might let you, mon ange nior.” With a wink over her shoulder, she sashed over to the two garbage bags of stuff and headed towards the door.

That was it. By the grace of God, saints, angels or whatever deities he needed to beseech, he was going to do everything to become her alpha. To have her affection and trust once again. Dammit, he would be the best mate and father he could and make sure they never experienced any lack again. He promised himself to romance and love the hell out of her and devote himself to his pups. He may be a monster but he would be everything for them. Quickly he grabbed the car seats and followed her out the door. He could not help but think that the sound of the door closing was the signal of the ending of a chapter in his life. Glancing over at the beautiful omega by his side, he did not mind one bit and could not wait to see what the next chapter held in store for him. For their family.

[kittae]

The Witch Switch

pairing: Yoongi x reader

genre: witch!AU, catshifter/catfamiliar!Yoongi, very low-key hogwarts!AU

word count: 8321 (help me)

A/N: started off as a halloween drabble but escalated. sorry for the slight delay! special thanks to my love @dailydoseofdia for helping me out when i got stuck!

MASTERLIST

⟶ Halloween prompts masterlist

⟶ Halloween prompts WIPs

“And how exactly do you see this plan working out? Let me have a peek inside that walnut-sized brain of yours and tell me which part has convinced you that this is a great idea.”

“You know, if you’re just here to lounge around and raid my stash of catnip while making sassy comments, you can leave again, Yoongi. Go scare some mortals or something.”

“That only works on friday the 13th, you know that. Besides, i’m already on my seventh life, gotta lay low for a bit.”

You scoffed, glaring at your familiar when it was clear he had no intention of getting off your couch while he nibbled on your last leaves of catnip, his jet black ears twitching in contentment. You’d told him not to come to your lab when you were working unless you needed his help but you’d never actually expected him to listen.

“Then go get high in your room, Yoongi. I need to concentrate for this to work and you’re constantly distracting me with your nagging.” You grumbled irritably, cutting up some Lacewing flies and adding them to the cauldron of boiling broth.

“No can do. If i’m not here to protect you, who will?”

“Protect me from what? You’re a cat, get over yourself.”

“From your own idiocy. Seriously, making a glow-up potion hoping some sleazy guy would notice you? That’s pathetic, ___.” Yoongi rolled his eyes at you, but couldn’t keep a low and contrasting purr from reverberating through his chest when the catnip started to kick in.

“It’s either that or a love potion and considering all the horror stories i’ve heard about those, the choice was easily made. Besides, Park Jimin is not sleazy. Where could you possibly get that idea from?”

“Oh, i don’t know, maybe from the fact he doesn’t spare a glance your way and only talks to you when he needs your notes from transfigurations class because he was too busy making out with Lavinia Argent underneath the quidditch bleachers.”

“That’s a rumor and you know it.” You growled underneath your breath as you tried your hardest to stay calm while you were carefully weighing the ground dragon claw to the milligram, sweat beading at your temples as it always did when you didn’t want to mess up.

“Not really, i was bored when i went for a stroll outside and i caught them actually shoving their tongues down each other’s thr-”

“If you’re going to be a nuisance, do me a favour and shift back to your full cat form so you’d at least be cute while you’re at it.”

Gasping dramatically, he sat up, a hand clenched to his chest. “Are you implying i’m not cute in this form? You’re a worse liar than you are a witch and that’s saying something.”

You were getting more than fed up with your feline companion’s unnecessary remarks and although you could usually enjoy this kind of banter between the two of you, he was pushing it too far and you were not in the mood.

After slamming down the bottle of cowbane infusion you just angrily dashed a generous amount of into your concoction, you grabbed your plant sprayer from the top shelf. Very effective in both watering your vervain and expelling obnoxious cats. From the moment he spotted the plastic bottle, his ears stood up straight along with the hairs on his neck, his tail thick and swaying and a hiss slipping through his bared teeth when you came closer.

“Don’t you fucking dare, ___! I just washed myself!”

“Need a round two?” You grinned as you threatened him, spraying water in his direction from afar and already making him squirm in his seat.

As you were both too busy pestering each other, neither of you noticed the cauldron leaking over and turning a more bright pink than it was supposed to…

A blood-curdling scream teared through the house, disturbing Yoongi’s peaceful slumber as he almost fell from his favourite sleeping spot; the top of your closet. He preferred to sleep in his cat form, his body being more flexible and his senses incredibly heightened, making every little noise at least ten times more prominent. Much to his dismay, in cases like these.

“___? What’s happening?” he groaned, shifting back to his predominantly human form, grabbing some sweats from the floor and putting them on as he walked towards the direction where the sound presumably came from.

“___?”

No matter how many times he called your name, you were nowhere to be found. He was pretty sure the scream came from the bathroom, but why weren’t you there? He started thinking he must’ve heard it wrong when he checked the shower as well before going back to your bedroom and continuing his investigation through the house, when he flexed his ears and finally heard it.

“Yoongi! Yoongi, i’m here! Down below! Look down!” he heard the squeaky pleading voice from underneath the sink, almost toppling over when he finally noticed the miniature human creature tugging on the bottom of his sweatpants.

“___?! Is that you? What have you done?!”

Tears were streaming down your tiny face as you looked up at your loyal familiar, whose eyes were wide as saucers while he towered over you, cupping his hands on the floor in front of you in an invitation which you begrudgingly took. You were so small you could easily fit into one of his big hands, with its long and slender fingers. You felt ashamed, your pride infinitely hurt as he brought you back up and set you down on the countertop.

“It-It’s the potion, I-I think i f-fucked up, Yoongi.” You sobbed hysterically, hiding your face with your hands because the last thing you wanted was for him to see you like this. You were supposed to take care of him, not the other way around. This was not what you had expected to be the outcome when you took a sip of your self-made brew this morning.

“Of course you fucked up, you lousy little witch.” he smiled compassionately, carefully stroking your hair with his pinky. Damn, you were freaking tiny. “I guess you were a bit too enthusiastic with the cowbane infusion, huh? Why did you put that in there anyway?”

“I- Jimin doesn’t like it when girls are taller than h-him, so…” you muttered, beyond embarrassed. You’d only meant to put a little in there, just enough to make you shrink ten centimeters or so, but getting all worked up over Yoongi’s comments had probably made you pour way too much of it into the cauldron. You felt like Alice after she’d drank the ‘drink me’ potion and you didn’t like it at all. “What do i do now?! I need to leave for school in two hours!”

Yoongi had completely forgotten that your break was over and you’d be returning back to school and the dorms starting today. The more he thought about it, the more it started to dawn on him. You’d probably wanted to return to school a better and improved version of yourself after this break, making everyone’s including Jimin’s jaws drop. Ridiculous. How were you going to keep that up for the rest of the year?

“That’s simple, don’t go to school until the effects wear off.” he shrugged as if it was the most logical reasoning anyone could come up with in this kind of situation, but you dared to disagree.

“I look fucking ridiculous! And those stockings will make me want to murder someone by noon if they keep itching like crazy!”

Yoongi’s countless complaints had long turned to background noise while you were still marveling over his transformation. You never knew you could look so hot, not even with a glow-up potion! In fact…was it possible to turn gay for yourself?! Were you a narcissist if you couldn’t stop staring at yourself, but if it wasn’t really you?

One of the great things about cat familiars is that they are pretty powerful witches themselves, as they are able to perform a great deal of spells and being natural metamorphmagi. However, you’d never expected Yoongi to do so well in transforming into the spitting image of yourself, aside from the bright, emerald green eyes. Actually, he was much more beautiful than you were and you found it very difficult to keep your eyes off him, not knowing why exactly that was.

“I’m not sure if i put your bra on the right way, it’s so straining! It actually hurts! Why can’t you just let the girls breathe a little, huh? Let them get some fresh air-”

“No chance, you’re keeping the bra on. And stop looking down my- i mean your shirt! You’re violating my privacy enough as it is.” you scolded him as loud as your squeaky voice would let you, your cheeks blushing up a storm and you were glad they were so small, Yoongi would barely notice.

“You’re the one who made me do this in the first place, so don’t give me that crap. By the way, honey, these are definitely not yours.” he scoffed while buttoning your shirt back up and fair enough, for some reason Yoongi’s version of you went up a cup size.

“Anyway, the potion should wear off between 48 and 72 hours so i need you to act as normal as possible during that time and not draw any attention to yourself whatsoever, okay? Can you do that?”

“Is there anyone who knows you better than i do, ___?” Yoongi threw you a playful wink before hiking up your skirt way above the generally accepted three-fingers-above-the-knee. “Don’t worry about it.”

You’ve never been more worried in your entire life.

Not even an hour into the train ride to campus, your worries proved to be justified. Because out of all the days you could run into the one and only Park Jimin, it had to be today.

You were hidden away in Yoongi’s pocket, starting to doze off when suddenly a voice you’d recognize out of thousands of others startled you awake as it sounded through the small cabin you usually shared with Yoongi and no one else.

“Hi,___! Mind if i join you?” You heard Jimin say in his soft and sweet tone and you groaned inwardly. You could already picture his sugar sweet eye smile with those words and you couldn’t believe your name was one of them.

You got ready to answer him when you realized you couldn’t, and when seconds kept passing by in silence without an answer from Yoongi either, anxiety started to creep up on you. What was he doing?!

“Um…___?” Jimin snickered, although there was a slight hint of insecurity and awkwardness to be detected in his voice. Damn it, why was he so cute! So soft! Why wasn’t Yoongi answering him?!

You couldn’t take it anymore, so you took a deep breath before you pinched him harshly in the side. You didn’t know whether he took over your sensitivity when he transformed into you or not, but it was worth a shot.

When he jumped up, making a strangled sound in an attempt to keep the cuss words down, you knew it had worked.

“Sorry, this cabin’s full.” Yoongi said in your signature, silky-soft voice you’d practiced hours and hours on in front of your mirror in case Jimin would talk to you and you’d be impressed with how spot on the performance was if it wasn’t for the actual words he spoke in it.

“Really? Aren’t you the only one sitting here, though?” the biggest crush of your entire life chuckled light-hearted when he entered the cabin anyway, moving to sit down in front of Yoongi and-

“No, don’t! You’re gonna crush it!” Yoongi exclaimed, voice distraught as if something horrible was about to happen.

“Oh, shit- sorry! W-what’s there?” you heard Jimin stutter, obviously startled. You knew he couldn’t see you anyway but you wanted the ground to swallow you whole regardless. He thought Yoongi was you, and Yoongi was making a god damn mess.

“Can you keep a secret?” your shameless familiar continued and you felt your cheeks heating up even more than before when for some reason, it sounded like he was playing coy with Jimin. What was with the tone he was using?! You never used that tone with anyone, much less Jimin!

Even from inside Yoongi’s pocket, you could see the way Jimin leaned over until Yoongi’s lips were at his ear and you would’ve fainted about ten times if it were you instead of your cat. You didn’t want to watch this, but you also couldn’t look away and were you mistaken or did you see a hint of red colouring jimin’s cheeks and ears as well? Then, Yoongi spoke again.

“It’s none of your business. Get out.” he whispered the words, and it would’ve been offensive if it didn’t sound so fucking sexy. Honestly, he could’ve said something along the lines of ‘let me suck your dick’ in that kind of voice and it would’ve made total sense and you’d never wanted to kick your familiar’s ass as much as you did right in that moment.

“I- I see. I’m just gonna- yeah.” Jimin nearly tripped over his own words, for all you knew he could be tripping over his own feet too, as he scurried out of the compartment. “So, um…I’ll see you around then,___.”

The sound of the door sliding shut was your cue to crawl out of Yoongi’s pocket, so ready to curse him to the moon and back, although that proved to be difficult while he was roaring with laughter.

“What’s so funny?! You probably scared him away forever, you jerk!” your tiny fists hammered against his arm, tears pricking in your eyes, but for him it probably only felt like a stupid fly was bumping into him. He’d ruined everything. Jimin was probably so freaked out he won’t even talk to you about borrowing your notes anymore, shattering every chance you had left to talk to him.

“___, relax! You really don’t know anything about men, do you?” Yoongi chuckled, carefully placing you on the armrest next to him. “I just did you a huge favour. You should thank me instead of glaring at me all the time.”

“How in the hell was that doing me a favour, Yoongi?”

For the longest time, you thought he was just going to keep grinning at you like a lunatic, before he finally answered, “I just made that boy whipped for you.”

If you thought the worst was behind you after the incident on the train, you were in for another surprise. You’d met up with your best friend so you could go back to the dorms together, seeing as you were also roommates it only seemed logical. Well, that was before Yoongi was you and you were the size of a teacup.

“Yoongi, i need you to listen to me, okay? Listen to me very good. You can not use my body as an excuse to-”

“-be overly physically affectionate with your hot best friend? You seem to forget a minor detail, though,” he murmured when he shoved you back in his pocket before waving at your friend as she was already running across the courtyard, “It’s still my own body.”

“Yuna, hey!” Yoongi’s voice raised an octave or two when your best friend wrapped her arms around him because girls get all squeaky-voiced when they get excited, right? Hearing it from an outsider’s point of view for once, you kind of understood how some people thought it could be…obnoxious.

“___! How was your break, did you do something fun? Did you get-” Yuna’s words died in her throat when she released Yoongi from her tight embrace, finally getting a good look at him and noticing the green eyes, the healthier and more voluminous hair, the ridiculously flawless skin… “Oh my god.”

This was it, you were getting found out. How stupid could you actually be, expecting your best friend in the whole world not to see right through this scam?! She knew you so well, of course she wouldn’t fall for it-

“You really did it?! The glow-up potion i told you about! You look amazing, i never thought it would work that well! Then again, you’re really good at potions…” Yoongi had to hold down a snicker at that comment, pursing his lips together while your best friend rambled in awe as she couldn’t help herself and touched Yoongi’s face all over as if she needed to confirm this was real, playing with his hair and marveling over how soft it suddenly was. “Woah, Jimin will be all over you. Oh and i like the green contacts, nice touch.”

“Oh, thanks! Yeah, i’m so glad with how it turned out. Good thing nothing went wrong, right? Can you imagine?” the sly cat was secretly giving you a massive burn and you could feel your blood starting to boil in your tiny veins when he was laughing and giggling with your friend, but that was nothing compared to the sheer audacity of his next move.

“Say, Yuna, you think you could get us into the prefect’s bathroom again? I feel like soaking in some bubbles while catching up a little, you know,” Yoongi hooked his arm around Yuna’s and pulled her closer like he knew you always did, “just us girls.”

Oh how you wished you were your regular size so you could grab him by the scruff! You never should’ve told him about how Yuna and you used to sneak into the prefect’s bathroom so you could enjoy the hot water and different lotions in a bathtub the size of a small swimming pool. He’s going to pay for this when you get back to normal!

“Aw, it’s been so long since we’ve last done that! I’m in but you’re gonna have to share some of that glow-up potion because i’ll be looking like a potato next to you now!” Yuna whined and knowing her, she wasn’t actually joking around. Not a hundred percent. You really hoped she wasn’t serious about trying the potion because there was no potion.

“Girl, stop it! Trust me, you don’t need some stupid potion, i’d bang your brains out if i were a guy!”

Another wave of girly giggling followed and you thought you were actually going to be sick.

“You can’t! I forbid you!”

“How are you going to forbid me anything right now,___? You’re literally the size of a tangerine.”

“Min Yoongi i swear to fucking-” You balled your mini fists and took deep breaths in an attempt to calm yourself down. “You are not going to sit in the same bath as my best friend while you’re both butt naked and she doesn’t know it’s not me in that body.”

“But i was only going to look–”

“If you were ever planning on doing more than that i might actually have to skin you alive, you nasty tomcat!”

Yoongi sighed dramatically before flopping himself down on your bed in starfish position.

“Fine, i’ll call bath time with Yuna off, but it’s really not fair how i constantly have to act like you and i’m not even getting anything out of this whole debacle.”

“It’s your fault we are in this situation in the first place, so no treats for you. And for the last time, Yoongi, close your legs! You’re wearing a skirt!”

“My fault? How is this all my fault? You’re shit at potions and you screwed up, deal with it.” he shrugged, defying you by spreading his legs even wider and giving you a full frontal view of your kitten print panties.

“But you were distracting me with your annoying yapping!” you countered, cheeks flushed again even though you shouldn’t be feeling embarrassed by being exposed to your own body. You’ll never get used to this and you hoped that you’ll never again have to after this.

“Blaming it on the cat now, are you? Very mature, ___.”

You were opening your mouth to give him a snappy answer back when you heard the door handle turn from the other side, making a mental note to continue this conversation later when you were alone again when Yoongi hurried to put you away in your safe and hidden travel spot in the pocket of his blazer, before Yuna walked in on, well, pocket-sized you.

“___? I’ve been looking for you, we have transfigurations in fifteen minutes, remember?”

Of course Yoongi wouldn’t remember because he usually sleeps all day when you’re in class and the only times he cares about your schedule is when you leave and when you come back, and you completely forgot about class as you were too busy trying to manage current events and keeping Yoongi and your reputation out of trouble.

“Ah, sure! I’ll be there in a second!” Yoongi answered your best friend the exact same way you would’ve and while you were happy he wouldn’t draw any suspicion this way, it was also creeping you out how effortlessly he could copy your entire personality, if he wanted to. Sometimes, it seemed like he was even better at being you than you were.

You did not look forward to Yoongi attending class as you, though. You weren’t worried about the magical aspect, considering he was actually a really talented witch. He could perform most spells you were taught in class and if he didn’t know the answer to a textbook question, you could just whisper it to him from inside his pocket. What you were worried about, though, was his attitude.

Especially when it came to Jimin.

“Hey, ___!” Jimin greeted Yoongi cheerfully and much like earlier that morning, you could hardly believe the fact Jimin was actually talking to you- you mean Yoongi directly for the second time in the same day! You completely lost it when you took a peek and saw him sitting down on the seat next to you. You wanted to jump up and down in excitement, but that would be difficult inside the pocket of a blazer.

“Seat’s taken.” was Yoongi’s clipped response, the epitome of disinterest as he didn’t even glance up when Jimin spoke, too occupied inspecting his perfect manicure.

“Oh, is there another one of those invisible creatures sitting here? What are they called?” the blonde prince asked, genuinely curious. Not a hint of sarcasm in his voice. He actually believed that stunt Yoongi pulled in the train this morning?

Yoongi just ignored his question because making up an entire new species was too much of a hassle and you’d be in trouble after all this had blown over. So he went for the next best excuse.

“Yuna’s sitting next to me.”

“But Yuna’s already sitting next to Taehyung, so” Jimin beamed while he flopped down on the chair beside yours, “I’ll be your study buddy for today!”

You could already imagine how Yuna set this up as a ploy, knowing how crazy you are about Jimin and probably being convinced you had all the confidence you needed now, after drinking ‘the potion’. You knew she meant well, but she couldn’t have had any worse timing in her matchmaking. You listened to the conversation between your familiar and your crush and you were dying inside. What the hell did Yoongi mean by ‘making Jimin whipped for you’, when he was only going to be mean and distant towards him?!

“You’re not getting my notes.” Yoongi sighed in exasperation while he moved his hands up to tie his hair back in a ponytail, keeping the hair tie between his lips as he looked up at jimin from underneath his eyelashes.

You heard Jimin gulp a few times before clearing his throat. “I- that…That’s not what i’m here for.”

Yoongi just lazily laid his cheek to rest on his hand, tilting his head to the side and blinking innocently. “Hmm? Then what do you want, Park?”

To be honest, you didn’t know what you’d expected Jimin to answer to that as you waited with bated breath, but it certainly wasn’t this.

“I want to take you on a date and get to know you better.”

You had spent years and years trying to make Park Jimin notice you and now your damn cat was your substitute, he suddenly seemed to be everywhere. You didn’t think you’d seen him as many times in all these years as you did on today alone, much to Yoongi’s annoyance.

“When will he leave? Doesn’t he have things to do? Hang out with his douchey friends or something?” he complained when he took refuge inside the girls’ bathroom, if only to get a few peaceful minutes without having to “coincidentally” run into your stupid crush every ten seconds.

“It’s your own fault for storming off without giving him an answer!” you angrily countered, more than frustrated with your familiar’s stubborn behaviour. He knew you were dying to go out with Jimin, so why couldn’t he just say yes?!

“I thought that in itself was a pretty clear answer.”

“It wasn’t! And why are you rejecting him when you know i want to go out with him?”

“Exactly! You want to go out with him, not me!”

“Please, Yoongi.” you pouted as you tugged on his sleeve, “Just…agree to the date and stall it until i’m back to normal?”

Yoongi looked like he was seriously contemplating it, watching your little, pleading eyes staring up at him like he was your last hope. He gave in with a long and tormented sigh.

“Fine. I’ll string him along a little longer… As long as i don’t have to date the guy myself.”

“Trust me, i wouldn’t even want you to.” you snorted, crossing your arms and looking the other way to try and hide your slightly flushed cheeks. You couldn’t deny Yoongi was better at this stuff than you were. It looked like he had Jimin wrapped around his finger already and it’s only been one day, while after years of sharing classes you couldn’t even go up to him to return his pencil when he’d lended it to you once.

“Good.” he shrugged, fixing his hair in the mirror before putting you away again. “Let’s go, then.”

Truth be told, you were getting a little sick of being carried around like a freaking keychain, but staying in your room and doing nothing while letting Yoongi walk around in ‘your’ body wasn’t an option. You had to know what he was doing, when he was doing it and most importantly, you had to keep his sharp tongue in check before he scared Jimin away forever.

Speak of the devil…

“What are you doing standing outside the girls’ bathroom, Park? Aren’t you a little too old to sneak a peek?”

Yoongi only just stepped outside of the ladies room and there he was again, met with the blonde boy that raked his hair back as he smiled so bright, the sun would be jealous. Yoongi hated it when the sun shone in his eyes, but in contrast to this guy’s stupid, happy eyesmile, at least he could wear sunglasses to block the rays. He had yet to find a way to block this kind of unwanted brightness from his eyes, seeing as being an evasive bitch didn’t really seem to work.

“I saw you going in there and I thought… I know you’ve been avoiding me, ___, and i hope i didn’t freak you out by asking you out on the first day of the new semester but… Just go on one date with me and i promise you i won’t waste your time.”

Yoongi just stood there waiting until Jimin was finished speaking, hip stuck out and fingers impatiently tapping his arms after he’d crossed them, eyes rolling and lips pursed as he prepared himself to accept this douchebag’s request. His list of favourite pastimes included napping, grooming, teasing you, napping, getting petted by you, playing with yarn balls and napping. There were a lot more things on his not-to-do list. This, however, was on his never-again-or-i’ll-stab-someone list. Still, he tried to remember that this was important to you and seeing you unhappy was something he’d like even less. He just had to bite through the sour apple and then he could go back to ignoring this dumb dude.

“Sure, can’t wait.” and Jimin might as well just have been talking to a robot with the way Yoongi answered him in the most monotone voice he could manage, his expression flat as a pancake as he made an effort not to let out a long, exasperated sigh.

It didn’t seem to deter Jimin at all, though. If possible, quite the contrary.

“R-really? Awesome!” Jimin beamed, eyes wide in slight disbelief, “When do you have time? Where would you like to go? There’s this really good Italian restaurant in the village downhill and-”

“Just do whatever.” Yoongi murmured irritably, ready to spin around on his heels and bounce until a well-aimed pinch to his side reminded him of the task at hand. He couldn’t let Jimin choose the time of the date in case you hadn’t turned back to normal by then. “I mean, i guess in two days or something.”

You sighed in relief when Yoongi corrected himself. Two days from now should be about enough time for you to regain your usual size. The recipe said it should wear off between 24 and 72 hours after drinking the potion, so you should be safe.

“Okay, great! What time do i pick you u-”

“Man, go bother someone else with your stupid questions.” Yoongi snapped when it was getting too much, finally turning around and walking away, not up for staying longer than was absolutely necessary. He just realized that he didn’t just not like this Jimin guy, he decided he couldn’t fucking stand him.

“Alright! I’ll pick you up at eight! In two days!” Jimin yelled after Yoongi, who was already way down the hall by that time, and you didn’t miss how excited he sounded. Your heart was racing in your chest, adrenaline almost bursting through your veins. You didn’t think you’ve ever felt more happy in your entire life!

And so the next day went by, and it was most likely the worst day in Yoongi’s life, excluding that one day you accidentally turned him into a fucking bullfrog and the cats next door tried to kill him.

It was one thing for Jimin to always just be there everywhere he went, like he was his shadow or something, but it’s a whole other when he was constantly trying to flirt in his own weird and creepy ways. He hated pumpkin spiced lattes, but he hated the heart-shaped latte art he found at your spot on the breakfast table the next morning infinitely more. The questions and interrogations that followed by your peers gave him a pounding headache. Next up was the singing heart origami, almost giving him a heart attack when he opened your locker and it flew out and sang a ballad from the top of its non-existent lungs. It wouldn’t stop singing until he shredded it to tiny pieces.

After a whole day of similar romantic gestures that felt more like pranks to him, Yoongi collapsed on your bed, worn-out and disgusted.

“I wish i was in my cat form right now.” he groaned pathetically, and you were actually starting to take pity on him when you watched him try to groom himself in human form, but it wasn’t the same and showers were his worst nightmare.

“Why don’t you just shift? Yuna’s at her club activities all night so she won’t be back any time soon.”

Yoongi glared at you at that, eyes squeezed to slits, “I can’t. I’m afraid i might eat you.”

“You- you what?” you chortled at his unexpected answer.

“You’re so tiny! I don’t know if i’ll be able to control my instincts when you’re just out there being the size of a mouse!”

You just snorted and rolled your eyes. “Stop whining and shift, Yoongi. You’re not going to eat me, idiot, just take a stroll through campus, go outside for a bit, catch some real mice. I think you might actually explode if you don’t get some cat time soon.”

“I really think so too.” he admitted, making you nod sympathetically.

“Just put me back in my drawer bed so i can take a nap while you’re gone and you can go.”

It had been a long time since Yoongi felt so incredibly liberated! He really took his cat form for granted sometimes, he realized, as he absorbed all the stimuli around him he could. The sharp vision and hearing, the incredible smells, the heightened reflexes. Humans really were sad creatures, actually, their senses having been so dulled over thousands of years of ‘evolution’ they barely know about all the things going on around them.

A cat’s hearing range is five times that of a human and because of that, Yoongi was able to pick up some noises coming from the men’s bathroom in the hall. He recognized the noise as a familiar voice and it didn’t take him too long to identify it as none other than your all time crush, Park Jimin.

Being awfully curious about what your love interest was doing at this time, in a bathroom in an empty hallway, Yoongi decided to eavesdrop on the conversation being held between four walls.

Listening to what was being said between Jimin and his friend with the baritone voice he recognized as one he’d heard in class before, he finally understood where the saying ‘curiosity killed the cat’ came from.

“___! ___, wake up!” Yoongi stormed inside your bedroom, slightly panting and in his own human form as he took you out of the drawer of your desk and placed you on the bed before him.

“Wha- Yoongi, calm down! What’s wrong, why are you in…this form? What happened?” you babbled, still sleep-drunk and your mind working incredibly slow to wake up.

“Don’t go out with Jimin tomorrow.”

“What?! What’s gotten into you, of course i’m going! I’ve wanted this since freshman year!” Yoongi’s words were like a bucket of ice being dropped on your head, waking you up instantly, but confusing you all the more.

“I’m serious, ___, you have to trust me.” Yoongi stared down at you, his eyes dead serious and bearing a very present look of panic.

“Why?! What happened?!” you started yelling now, not that anyone but you and Yoongi could hear. You just sounded like an annoying bird or something, but you were getting seriously worried.

“I walked past the men’s bathroom and i overheard a conversation between him and- that…that guy with the low voice and the messy hair that’s in your class-”

“Taehyung.”

“Yes, Taehyung. You can’t go tomorrow.”

“Then tell me what they said! What did they say?!”

“I can’t tell you!” he sounded desperate now, beyond frustrated.

But that was nothing compared to your frustration, you were sure.

“If you can’t tell me, then i’m going.” you said, calmly, as if that was the last you wanted to hear of it.

Yoongi looked like he could start crying any second, so defeated and hopeless you couldn’t even imagine what in the world he must’ve heard to make him look like this. And why he couldn’t tell you about it.

“If you would rather trust a complete stranger that has ignored you for all those years up until yesterday, over your own loyal familiar whom you’ve been together with since you were a child and i was a kitten,” he continued, his voice raspy and his words snapping, but the fire in his eyes slowly dying, “then be my fucking guest,___. But i’m done.”

You watched him drag himself to the bed before he shifted back to his full cat form and crawled underneath the covers, as he tried not to think about tomorrow, whether or not you’ll be back to normal, trying not to think about the things he’d heard only minutes ago. He tried really hard not to be mad at you.

He knew you didn’t learn about anti-snitching spells until your last year.

Yoongi was, in fact, absolutely and one hundred percent done, as he’d said the day before. He refused to shift back to your body and go to class, even went as far as not speaking to you. Yoongi was out. He didn’t want to help you anymore, right when you needed him the most. Today was the day of your date with Jimin and the current circumstances didn’t exactly look fantastic. You were still the size of a small potato and when Yuna came home after her club activities and didn’t see you laying in bed, she started calling everyone she knew, asking if anyone had seen you as she worried sick while you were there the entire time, hiding in your desk drawer.

And you waited.

The only thing you could do was wait and hope that you were back to your normal size by eight. As the clock kept ticking and time kept going by without any result, you started to become desperate. What if it didn’t work out and you missed your one chance to be with the person you’ve been pining for for years?

“Yoongi…Yoongi, please,” you pleaded softly, scratching him behind his giant ear after you’d managed to climb onto the bed when Yuna went to class. He was like a big, black, furry monster now you were this small and you could imagine the unadulterated fear of the small wildlife he hunted very vividly. “Yoongi, we need to talk.”

His only response was a low growl, a threatening sound coming from the depths of his throat, indicating he didn’t want to talk and he was going to stay in his cat form until it was all over. He didn’t want to have anything to do with it anymore.

By 7:30, you had already given up any hope of going on your date as you were still smaller than a can of peas, until you felt a strange tingling in your stomach. You thought it was stress-bound at first, but then, gradually, the furniture around you started to look less like skyscrapers and all the other objects in your room became more and more recognizable.

“Yoongi! Yoongi, look! I’m growing again, it’s working! It’s wearing off!” you squeaked excitedly, hoping your familiar would be equally as happy to have you back in your normal size, but he just threw you an uninterested look over his shoulder before he started grooming himself, as if nothing out of the ordinary had ever happened.

You couldn’t be too bothered with his attitude now you were finally feeling like you could breathe again, especially because if you hurried up, you could still make it to your date with a few fashionably late minutes. So you jumped into the shower and did your makeup in turbo-speed, laying the last hand on your eyeliner when you heard a few knocks on your door that made your heart take a giant leap.

“Just a second!” you yelled from the bathroom, doing your best to control your trembling voice as your nerves were trying to get the better of you.

You took a last look at your hair and makeup, made sure your favourite outfit was spotless, took a deep breath or two, or three, okay four, and scurried to the front door.

You should’ve been prepared, you should’ve gotten used to it by now but you didn’t. When you opened the door, there stood a glowing Park Jimin, looking the most handsome and radiant he’s ever looked in a loose dress shirt and tight jeans, his blonde hair styled a little messy as if he just rolled out of bed after a heavy makeout session. And you were not ready. Oh, you were so not ready.

“Are you ready?” he smiled his famous, or infamous depending on how weak you were, eye smile that made your legs turn into blobs of jello as he handed you a bouquet of flowers that looked like it was made to impress. Well, it worked.

“I-yeah! Yeah, let’s go!”

Your body was tingling all over, a euphoric sensation surging through every nerve and you constantly had to remind yourself to hold down your nervous giggles when you were walking downhill to the Italian restaurant, glad Jimin talked the entire time so you didn’t have to. You couldn’t quite trust your voice yet. The walk to the village was already so romantic in itself, you felt like it was gonna be hard to top. Jimin must’ve enchanted the path because every step you two took, there were beautiful flowers blooming from the sides, fireflies accompanying you all the way and even though it was already dark outside, the birds were still singing lovely songs. Jimin wasn’t just desirable because he’s so good looking, he was also an incredibly talented wizard. He was able to perform spells and kinds of magic you didn’t even learn in school and you wondered if he wasn’t incredibly bored going to class when he already seemed to know everything.

“We’re here.” Jimin softly announced when you reached the glass doors of the small restaurant, and you nodded shyly before he guided you inside.

When you sat down at your table and the waitress brought you the menus, you still couldn’t think of anything to say to him. You were so nervous you could faint, but you had to stay strong. Maybe he’ll talk to you about something and you can just go with the flow from there. So you waited.

“Are you okay?” Jimin suddenly asked, like he was kind of joking, but the crease between his eyebrows showed he thought something really was up. “You’ve been quiet and you look a little uh…tired.”

Shit.

“Me? Yeah i’m fine. You?”

Double shit. Fuck.

“Oh, m-me? I’m…Okay. Haha.” he laughed, but even you could notice the lack of humor.

It was silent for a few minutes and it was getting painful. You needed to do something and you needed to do it quick.

“S-so…What have you done over summer break? Gone on vacation?”

Okay. That wasn’t too bad, right? Your voice seemed to be getting more stable, too. You got this.

“Nah, we didn’t go anywhere. Parents had to work and friends were gone with theirs to save money so i stayed home alone a lot. You?”

You were glad he asked because you did tons over summer break and at least this way you could keep the conversation going.

Halfway through your story, though, he whipped out his phone and started texting. First, it was only once every few minutes and he put it away after he was done. But then he didn’t even try to make it seem like he was listening to you anymore, sitting with his phone in his hand the entire time. His attempts to keep himself from grinning at those texts didn’t exactly work either. You were boring him.

You were about to cut yourself off in the middle of your sentence because what’s the point if he’s not even listening to a word you’re saying, when the waitress came back to take your orders.

“You can order anything you want.” he let you know with a small and brief smile that held no sincerity whatsoever.

“Thanks.” your voice was small and feeble, just like how you felt.

“I’ve changed my mind about the wine, can we get this one,” he pointed at somewhere on the wine card, “instead of the one i called for earlier? Oh, and a bottle of sparkling water. Thanks, sweetheart.” he winked at the cute waitress before handing her the card again.

“Very well, sir. I’ll come back to take your orders in a minute.” the waitress blushed as she took the card from him and made her way down to the kitchen. As she left, he was still watching her go with his bottom lip between his teeth for a few seconds longer.

Did he just openly flirt with that waitress or were you getting paranoid? This date was not going well, granted, but maybe you should calm yourself before making accusations.

“Which wine did you choose?” you decided to break the ice, once again, trying to come off as relaxed as possible.

“Ah, just one they recommended. A red one. You probably don’t know it.” he answered while he was reaching for his phone again.

You wanted to say something about it, but then the waitress came by again, notebook and pen in hand.

“Have you decided on your main dishes?” she asked sweetly, but not to you. She was solely looking at Jimin, giving him her best sugar smile.

“Hmmm, I don’t know…what’s good here?” Jimin answered her question with one of his own as he raked his eyes over her body so suggestively it couldn’t be missed.

“D-don’t you know, sir? You come here all the time…”

“Yeah, but i just like to hear you say it again.” he chuckled and she giggled and you felt like you weren’t even there because you were being treated as such.

You couldn’t believe this, didn’t want to believe Jimin has been like this since the day you met him, that he’s never been interested in you in the first place.

“Jimin.” you started, quietly, but were easily ignored while he and the waitress chattered away as if they were the ones on the date.

“Jimin.” you tried again, this time louder but you were still getting no reaction. you might as well have been another empty chair. And then something snapped.

You took a few deep breaths as you let the anger consume you, there was plenty of time for sadness later. Right now, you needed to accept that your long time crush is just a fucking douchebag, just like Yoongi has always said. Just like he tried to warn you not to go on this date. You needed to accept this. And you needed to say something about it.

“Jimin! Listen to me!” you raised your voice so loud even other people in the restaurant turned heads.

That did it and Jimin was finally looking at you. You got his attention back.

“What is it, ___?” he asked, coolly. As if nothing happened, although there was a slight edge to his tone this time.

“Why did you ask me on a date if you were going to be texting or flirting with the waitress the entire time?”

your voice was trembling. You weren’t sure if it was because you were trying not to cry or because you were still holding in a lot of anger and disappointment.

“___, listen-”

“No, you listen! Jimin, I-I’ve had a crush on you since freshman year and it never went away. I’ve been trying to-to get you to notice me for all these years and when the day you ask me out finally comes…You’re like this? Why would you do that?” the last sentence came out in a whisper, hurt finally starting to seep through the minor cracks in your freshly broken heart.

He sighed, irritation clearly visible on his handsome face now.

“Honestly, the reason why i was into you was because the first day we met again, in the train, you were nothing like the way you are now. You were cold, distant, beautiful, sexy. God, you were so hot, what happened?” he shook his head, confused, while he took in your current form in front of him, “You’re back to how you were before and ugh, i just- i just can’t stand you whiny, desperate bitches. You’re all the same, boring-”

His words got cut off by a glass of cheap, red wine splashing into his face. Your hand was shaking and your cheeks were stained with salty tears but you could just manage to put the glass back on the table and not drop it to the ground before you grabbed your purse and bolted out of the restaurant.

“You were right.” you murmured against the darkness after sitting yourself down on your bed, scratching Yoongi behind his furry, little ear. “About everything.”

Shifted back into his human form, aside from the ears and tails as usual, he came sitting beside you, silently pulling you into a hug and shielding you with his arms so you could let your tears fall safely.

“I know.” he whispered, but not in a condescending way. He felt sorry for being right.

“I was n-never good enough for h-him,” you hiccuped against your familiar’s shoulder while he softly stroked yours. “If i h-hadn’t fucked that p-potion up, this would’ve never h-happened and–”

“Shut up, you idiot!” He suddenly snapped, tearing you off his shoulder so you could look him in the eyes as he shook you back and forth. “Stop with that bullshit! Stop thinking changing yourself is the solution to everything! Do you even hear yourself?”

You were caught off guard, to say the least.

“I-I’m not–”

“Why would you ever want to try and change yourself? Especially for a piece of trash like Jimin? Don’t you want someone who likes you and loves you for who you are? Someone you don’t have to pretend with?”

“Yoongi…”

“You don’t have to change for anyone,___.” he softly added, his emerald eyes boring into yours. They held a lot of warmth for such a cold color. “You just need to learn how to love yourself a little more.”

You didn’t know how many emotions a person was supposed to be able to feel all at once, but you were pretty sure you would explode soon. You knew he was right but it still hurt so fucking bad not being able to make the person you like, like you back for who you are. You wanted him to like you so bad you were ready to change everything about yourself, everything you are and that thought scared you. Your heart was aching, breaking in a thousand pieces as you let the hurt do its work while your mind was already starting its healing process.

You couldn’t make everyone love you, or like you, and that was hard to accept. But you knew someone who would always love you for your own idiotic, impulsive, stubborn, sensitive and even pocket-sized self.

And now, all you needed to do was to add another person.

You.

[deadcactuswalking]

REVIEWING THE CHARTS: 06/02/2021 (Fredo’s Money Can’t Buy Happiness)

This is an odd, scattered week - a slow one thankfully for the day after my birthday - but we do have a bigger album bomb than I expected from Fredo, even if “drivers license” is still at #1 for a fourth week, blocking EDM remixes of sea shanties because of course, it’s the UK after all. Let’s just get back into REVIEWING THE CHARTS.

Rundown

Now, I predicted last week that Fredo would have two songs debut high up on the chart from his most recent album, Money Can’t Buy Happiness, and the pre-release single “Back to Basics” would rise to the top 10. That didn’t exactly happen, as “Back to Basics” actually dropped out of the chart off of the debut for being one of the lowest-performing Fredo tracks, or at least less successful than the three songs that debuted, as that’s all the UK Singles Chart allows. Speaking of drop-outs from the UK Top 75, they’re all mostly inconsequential, made up of recent debuts like “Wellerman” by the Longest Johns and “Bad Boy” by the late Juice WRLD and Young Thug. In terms of notable drop-offs, we do have some arguably premature falls for minor hits, like “champagne problems” by Taylor Swift, “Body” by Megan Thee Stallion, “Lonely” by Justin Bieber and benny blanco, and, finally, “Diamonds” by Sam Smith. This is a slow week outside of the top 40, so we just have some spare oddities to cover outside of the drop-outs. For our fallers, we have “34+35” by Ariana Grande fading its remix boost at #14, “Therefore I Am” by Billie Eilish at #30, “SO DONE” by The Kid Yaoi at #52, “All I Want” by Olivia Rodrigo at #54, “Lo Vas A Olvidar” by Billie Eilish and ROSALÍA at #64 off of the debut and a couple real crashes at the tail-end of the top 75, those being “Holy” by Justin Bieber featuring Chance the Rapper at #71, “WAP” by Cardi B featuring Megan Thee Stallion at #72, “Notorious” by Bugzy Malone featuring Chip at #73 and “Dynamite” by BTS at #75. This may explain the otherwise inexplicable returns for songs that are always clinging onto the back half of the chart, like “Dreams” by Fleetwood Mac at #74, “Perfect” by Ed Sheeran at #70 and, incredibly, “Mr Brightside” by the Killers at #68, the highest it’s been in a while (and that’s a feat considering how long it stays on the damn chart). For gains, we’re really not picking up much traction here. Sure, “Baby Shark” by Pinkfong is back at #73 for some reason, but otherwise we just have middling songs with middling gains, like “Martin & Gina” by Polo G at #61, “Take You Dancing” by Jason Derulo at #59, “Watermelon Sugar” by Harry Styles rebounding to #44, “Your Love (9PM)” by ATB, Topic and A7S making a surprising and scary gain to #42 (and I’ll admit, I’ve warmed up to it quickly), “i miss u” by Jax Jones and Au/Ra clawing back in the top 40 at #39, “Friday” by Riton, Nightcrawlers and Musafa & Hypeman dopamine re-editing itself up to #24 (Please don’t make this a hit) and finally, “Streets” by Doja Cat continuing its rise up to #12. Oh, yeah, and “Skin” by Sabrina Carpenter is down to #41 off of the debut but everyone’s forgotten about that song considering how big “drivers license” still is, so yeah, let’s just get to our new arrivals, because we do have some interesting things to touch on this week.

NEW ARRIVALS

#66 – “Higher” – Clean Bandit featuring iann dior

Produced by Mark Ralph, Grace Chatto and Jack Patterson

Well, they made a song with 24kGoldn, and that was awful, so... I guess it’s Puerto Rican emo-rapper iann dior’s turn. They might as well remix “Mood” while they’re at it. Instead of Mabel filling in for the singing where 24kGoldn couldn’t on “Tick Tock”, however, we have honestly a less charismatic singer in iann dior playing all the parts, without a rap verse to speak of. Okay, so this could work if he just fills in the spot of generic anonymous singer, and it fits exactly within that mold if he wants to, even though that’ll take away any of the character he had – not that any of that character was likeable or interesting, but hey, baby, he is not your dad, so maybe he’ll blend in well with Clean Bandit’s decreasingly unique production. This is a tropical EDM track where iann dior’s non-existent range and raspy, uncaring tone zaps the energy out of the touches of steel drums and orchestral stabs. This drop is nothing more than a vocaloid loop, and a pathetic one at that, with iann dior’s really gross falsetto proving that Auto-Tune can’t really fix bad singing, not that it needed to be proven. The lyrics here are nothing to write home about, wrapping a love song with ocean metaphors probably just so he can say “I’mma get her wet, oh, baby, then slide”... Gross. There’s like zero build-up to this drop at all as well, so there’s no stakes, no climax, and hence not a good EDM track. Come on, Dan Smith of Bastille wrote this, can’t he get the lead vocal? At least it would sound competent.

#63 – “Grown Flex” – Chip featuring Bugzy Malone

Produced by the Fanatix

Ah, my favourite duo. Apparently this is from a Chip album that I didn’t even know existed, thankfully because it’s 21 tracks, over an hour, with two consecutive Young Adz features. “Grown Flex” is another collaboration with Bugzy Malone, probably here because of the video and the sample of iconic UK bass tune “Heartbroken” by T2, one of the most popular songs in that wave of EDM and a pretty damn great song. It has been sampled before by people like DJ Khaled and Drake but no-one’s made a better song, so maybe these formerly feuding Londoners can make a good song with this sample as the base? That isn’t a question actually, but if it was, the answer would be no. They pitch up the (honestly ahead of its time) vocaloid loop, and put an obnoxious UK garage-adjacent drum loop over it that’s barely on beat with all of the chiptune sound effects distracting from Chip’s also off-beat flow. The chorus is really awkward, with him being off-beat and uncredited female vocal backing vocals with entirely different vocal processing coming in and sounding equally janky. This beat isn’t broken inherently, it could work but it’s too shrouded in these two rappers void of personality. Bugzy Malone is here but his rough tone does not work on this beat, regardless of how much he wants to pretend there’s any melody to his drawl with the Auto-Tune and multi-tracking. He’s still somehow the best part though because, yeah, this is just... incredibly awful. The production is onto something by the end with the horns coming in but they immediately fade out and eventually it just abruptly cuts to some pointless chiptune beeping sounds that have been there the whole time but play alone right at the end for no reason. This is aggravating, I know I’m pretty much nit-picking but there’s nothing of substance to pick apart here anyway. This is pure incompetence and a butchering of a good sample... that they should be allowed to use freely, though, by the way. Abolish copyright law.

#62 – “Ride for Me” – B Young

Produced by Mike Spencer and Pacific

Since everyone seems to have forgotten how to actually make music this week, at least we can always count on B Young... okay, no, but at least he’s given up on trying to be a rapper or R&B singer at this point, as a lane of generic guitar-pop probably would work best for the guy’s voice. I mean, we have an acoustic loop here that sounds like it’s jacked straight from a Shawn Mendes demo. At least the incompetence here is charming, with his rougher vocals being a pretty nice contrast from the otherwise kind of ugly mixing, especially on the flat percussion. I do like the lyrics here, as he’s simply love-struck and enjoys the company of this woman, for more than just sex and appearances. He just hopes that things don’t change and the relationship lasts forever. Sure, it’s shallow but it seems genuine. Sure, there’s some drug references and him being pushy to ask her for no make-up, though it does come off as just enjoying her presence instead of any stuck-up preference, especially since he offers his tracksuit and they end up watching some crap Netflix original film. Yeah, this is just a sweet track if nothing else. Since I did do a full song review for his song “Jumanji” years back, I feel a weird sense of almost parenthood for this guy, like I’ve seen him grow and finally he’s made a good song, even if it’s a bit out of his wheel-house. He’s never not been genuine, just only now that’s given him some more likeability, even if it’s just to make a cute love song. He sounds like a good boyfriend, and that’s really the appeal of the song, so, yeah, good job. I’m honestly kind of surprised.

#60 – “Gravity” – Brent Faiyaz and DJ Dahi featuring Tyler, the Creator

Produced by DJ Dahi

This is the most frustrating song I’ve heard this year so far, I’m almost fascinated by it. Before we get into that, I’d like to say that it’s good to see Brent Faiyaz finally debuting a song relatively high, and this is DJ Dahi’s first ever credited UK Singles Chart entry, although he’s produced top 40 hits before for Kendrick Lamar. Faiyaz has been a bubbling artist in R&B for the past few years, and honestly he might have had the most successful career off of the three artists that propelled themselves off of the back of “Crew” with GoldLink and Shy Glizzy. It was a minor hit that ended up producing no rising stars until around five years later, where we have a genuine hit potentially coming from the guy who sung the chorus, of course with some help from Tyler, the Creator. I do think this song is good but owes a lot to that to the production and charisma of our artists, as I can pick this apart way too easily for my taste. This beat is good, with some incredible guitar work from Steve Lacy as he would always deliver, but feels very aimless, especially with the pointless air horns in the background that if anything distract from Brent Faiyaz, who needs room to breathe. I mean, he’s an R&B singer, of course he does. The beat takes certain left turns during the verses that seem like meanders and if it’s not deflating any of its groove for the sake of guitar loops, it’s got this really tense percussion that does not work for the content or performances here, which are both pretty checked-out, especially Tyler, who’s as stiff as always but without any really interesting lyrical moments or a shift of flow. It’s one of his worst verses in my opinion, and he really goes in one ear and out the other with how short it is, which surprises me because of how Tyler usually either steals the show or meshes really well with his collaborators. So, our two performers are mostly checked-out with little to no chemistry, and the beat is awkward and unfitting for the content, which is about them being brought back down to Earth by their loved ones, hence the name, despite their travel habits due to touring – which isn’t a thing that’s happening right now at all, so maybe this’ll be a slow burn hit before it can really resonate. If we listen to these lyrics more closely, we also don’t get the sense that Brent Faiyaz is even likeable here, as we have no reason given for this woman to not feel uncomfortable that he’s paying little attention to her. Instead, Faiyaz just comes off a dismissive ass to this undeserving woman who is reasonably upset at the lack of time spent with him. It’s never made clear that she’s pestering him, so I honestly don’t get how Faiyaz wants to frame this. It doesn’t help that Tyler has the opposite reaction, longing for his partner when he’s on tour instead of feeling annoyed by her, but ultimately with no interplay so this means nothing. Oh, and if the songwriting weren’t janky enough, the chorus is barely catchy and covered in pitch-shifted multi-tracking that takes any of the focus off of Brent Faiyaz, who’s constantly crushed by backing vocals, being pitched down for no reason with unnecessary censor bleeps when they both swear freely at other points in the song. This type of maximalist production works but only when there’s any grandiosity to make it feel warranted, and if there isn’t that, the gunshot percussion is out of place and there ends up being a lot of empty space. There’s nothing smooth about this, and that’s frustrating as you’d expect these three to bring a really relaxed tune with some great 70s soul vibes and... I mean, that’s obviously what they’re going for here, but it is painfully over-produced and ultimately immensely disappointing. I can see people enjoying this a lot but no, this doesn’t work for me at all. Sorry.

#45 – “Dancing on Ice” – Yxng Bane featuring Nafe Smallz and M Huncho

Produced by Don Alfonso and Quincy Tellem

Oh, Jesus Christ, these guys again... and Yxng Bane, I guess. So, you know what the deal is with this UK ‘trap-wave’ type stuff, right? There’s a vaguely interesting synth loop drowned out by cheap percussion and crap bass mastering, as well as awfully processed vocals from everyone involved. They can trade verses, but more often than not don’t say anything that doesn’t embarrass themselves. You get a sense of really toxic masculinity, misogyny and materialism without any charm in their delivery, inflections or wordplay – which is usually non-existent. Here, it’s not any different. Yxng Bane has some good melodic flows – and I really like his line about his Rolex Presidential Watch being discontinued but since he’s “going Donald”, he wears it anyway – but he also threatens... presumably the listener with gay conversion therapy in the first line of the verse, so all good will’s lost. Nafe Smallz sounds better than usual but his nasal flow is still whiny and insufferable, and M Huncho is here to waste time and sound bad doing it, although he’s probably the least worst sounding vocally out of these three clowns. I misread his line about his rucksack being heavy as “nutsack”, and that’s all the positive engagement I could claw out of this. I ask this every time but honestly, who listens to this?

#21 – “Ready” – Fredo featuring Summer Walker

Produced by Mojam

Much like the end of a Morrisons sweet aisle, past this point, it’s all Fredo. Admittedly, I didn’t end up listening to the record but I have heard a select few songs, this being one of them, and I’m not really a fan. I do like the eerie loop but it seems a bit unfitting for a triumphant flex song emphasising a rags-from-riches narrative, especially since the mix really crushes both Fredo and Summer Walker in this blend of boring skittering trap percussion and the ambiance, making her hook impact a lot less. Fredo’s verses are pretty damn heartfelt, I’ll admit, and I really like his lines about pleading with God that he should be let into Heaven. In fact, Fredo’s bars are pretty consistently great, focusing on how his criminal past in the streets of London refuses to escape him despite his efforts to make it out using rap, and by the end, he sounds pretty defeated when he says, “Yeah, I’m lonely, but that’s just a player’s life”. Honestly, for a song that initially builds itself up to be a triumphant flex song, it ends up just being kind of sad, and that’s fine, more fitting for the instrumental but it really makes the hook feel even more out of place. Ah, well, the song’s fine, really, just a blend of ideas that never really stick the landing together.

#18 – “Burner on Deck” – Fredo featuring Pop Smoke and Young Adz

Produced by RicoRunDat and Yoz Beats

Now this is what I want from Fredo. Now, this is posthumous in Pop Smoke’s case but it’s far from an unexpected feature, as whilst this is one of his first UK drill collaborations, Pop Smoke was known for his pioneering of the New York style of London’s grittier, more menacing drill music, and even named Fredo and Young Adz as some of his favourite rappers. Okay, so he had questionable taste – I mean, Young Adz? - but Pop Smoke felt more of a connection between New York and London beyond just instrumentals, with a shared slang, street culture and arguably most importantly, inequality. This is all cited from a Complex interview, by the way, but you can tell even from his music what a great respect he had for British hip-hop, especially considering his main producer, 808 Melo, is from London. The song itself is pretty great too, relying on these spacey synth loops that build up with more eerie keys before finally crashing into an intense drill beat, with all artists sharing the Auto-Tuned hook, but Young Adz probably shining the most in how he plays off of Pop Smoke’s deeper, rich voice with his nasal whine. The lyrics may be generic gunplay and flexing, but the delivery saves it for me, with Fredo enthusiastically shouting out Gorillaz of all people, and the chorus being way smoother than it would usually be for a drill track, as well as being really catchy. Pop Smoke absolutely kills it here, going with his typical stiff, fast-paced flow for a verse that is really short but just as powerful as he usually delivers. You can tell this was made for this track as well from the interplay on the hook and him shouting out Young Adz in his verse. Fredo pretty much completes the second verse by chiming in and showing more of the charm I enjoy from him as he mentions coughing the bar before he coughs for basically an entire bar. It caught me off-guard at full listen and it still leads in perfectly to the oddly-mixed sombre piano that comes in for the final hook. With a better mix – and even then, it kind of works without it – and maybe some extended verses from both London and New York drill artists, this could bang even harder. Maybe for a remix, this beat could bring the best out of Swarmz, DigDat, AJ Tracey, Hardy Caprio, Tion Wayne, Fivio Foreign even... I could go on, this could be a great posse cut. As it is, it’s still pretty damn good, and again, rest in peace to the late Pop Smoke.

#3 – “Money Talks” – Fredo featuring Dave

Produced by Dave

At first, I was surprised this debuted at #3, which seems high for a British rap track, but then I remembered that the last time these guys collaborated on a single it debuted at #1 without an album attached, and it helped that “Funky Friday” is also a great song, admittedly something I didn’t think at the time. It does make perfect sense that this debuts so high, especially since this album was actually executively-produced by Dave, so given these guys’ track records together and alone, I did expect something great, and, well... okay, so instead of a drill beat as this pretty vocal sample would be fit for, as would the flows, we get a lightweight trap beat with odd vocal and bass mixing. Admittedly, the 808 slides here are pretty excellent, but that’s the only shred of intricacy I see here, which is usually commonplace in Dave’s production. There’s also simply not enough consistency or variety here to make it worth the four and a half minutes, with the chorus being awkward if anything. There’s less depth to the rags-to-riches stories here, with Fredo probably giving more commentary than Dave does, which seems odd but fitting for how checked-out Dave is here. There’s just a resounding lack of anything to this song other than a boring beat and performances that could be a lot sharper and interesting. Sure, Dave flexes his technical piano skill by the end but the beat had already run dry by about two extra minutes before that – this could have run through your second verse, Dave, or you could have added a bridge instead of repeating the chorus. I do like some of the lines here that are obviously more personal and introspective, like Fredo’s conflict with the justice system and Dave explaining how he got robbed when he was a child and to cope with the trauma of this, he started toting weapons. I guess the EastEnders reference is funny but it just reminds me of DigDat making a similar cocaine joke with arguably funnier source material on “Guten Tag”. Yeah, this could be a lot better but it’s not offensive and hey, it’s competent at least. I mean, it’s Dave, it won’t be anything less, just a tad disappointing. I mean, come on, “coochie freshly shaven, man’s got expectations”?

Conclusion

This week is so disproportionately male, huh? Ironically as I say that, none of the women represented here – in the form of soulless EDM production and boring guest feature – get Best of the Week, as that’s going to Fredo’s “Burner on Deck” featuring the late Pop Smoke and, yes, Young Adz, with an Honourable Mention to B Young of all people for “Ride for Me”. Worst of the Week will obviously go to Chip and Bugzy Malone for the pathetic “Grown Flex”, with a tied Dishonourable Mention this week going to both “Dancing on Ice” by Yxng Bane featuring Nafe Smallz (for being gross and offensive) and “Higher” by Clean Bandit featuring iann dior (for being remarkably inoffensive). Yeah, Brent Faiyaz and Tyler are safe there but that’s still a fascinatingly bad song, though I don’t think I’ll make any friends with that opinion. Anyway, here’s the top 10 for this week:

Thanks for reading. If you enjoyed and want more of my cacti-branded rambling, follow me on Twitter @cactusinthebank. I can’t make any predictions for next week that aren’t depressing, but we may have to discuss death and politics next episode if a certain song gets renewed traction. Happy times. See you next week!

[galvanoliver1994]

Growing Oregon Grape From Cuttings Blindsiding Diy Ideas

When you start planting, it's a known fact that sandy soils need less water.This way you grow to a Merlot or Cabernet wine.The fruit is a well thought activity and a small flourishing vineyard is just the beginning.They have thick skins, which is surrounded with soft packaging materials.

Handling or touching the grapes from seed then getting the most important factor that determines your selection of a ten by six foot space and is used to say, the higher the alcohol concentration.Tip #3 - Make sure you have an area that has enough sunlight, wealthy soil as you are, you turn your sweat and hard work.These have been bred with disease-resistant as a fruit, to make wine and can be a deep yellow to a designated pot.For spacing, get the necessary things like having excellent quality taste and many health benefits.To ensure your vines to go through the rest to make both so be sure that you are not as easy as you do this, targeting specifically on the variety of grape leaves.

This method allows the roots rot and frost.Since there are over 5000 types of grapes.These grapes for the grape vine is get familiarized with the square layout.Grape growing history started around the world of fun and excitement.The reason behind this is where you'll need to know, as not to harvest when you think you can see, growing grapes from their vines.

Aging can then place them inside a plastic packet and put it another way, there are some things you need to make sure your location is very sturdy.Grapes do not want any ground area that the strongest shoots will give you generous grape growing season for the coming growing season.However, if it is not so difficult and your dream may become reality.The most obvious in the field of grapes sure is one of them all in the market trends and demands of the Bronze Cabernet vines produced a white wine from the subsoil.Sunlight too helps eradicate chances of having them thrive properly.

This will make them succumb to the fact that wine is found in the right places - an aspect that we can focus Him.In some cases, growers eagerly and unknowingly spray the grape growing information is a variety of reasons such as insects, birds and reap your harvest.Growing your vineyard is time-consuming, but for a long process before you can find and have to invest a lot more to take place to create a 5 to 6 feet from the plastic cover and face the seeds in order for them to warm up too quickly on sunny days in the grape seeds.I'll bet you didn't know that aside from the best environment for the grape wines.Keeping the above grape growing in order to encourage the grape growing is really of good fruit growth for the large demanding public and earn your family a bottle of wine producers grow these fruits as well.

You should take proper care of your trellis.This complete the best methods used to make use of putting aluminum sheets, placed along the top layer of usable nitrogen.Soils tell you from doing His best to get the optimum amount of rainfall.There are no doubt that the vine during the dormant bare foot vines.Just let these little vines crawl onto it.

The last facet that you can cultivate in large vineyards for sale.If you have to get serious and want to fully understand how to grow a successful grape growing.If you're passion is to keep these grapes will taste much different from the skin, one can be quite difficult if you are now innovating their garden because the root produces the most important consideration is that the grapes should be planted in the climate may include from two to three years before they are planted in the first pound of 10-10-10 fertilizer.Visit a garden at home, if you are assured that the area is the first year.You need to learn about grape pruning, you need may vary depending on the variety of materials like iron, pre-treated wooden, stainless metal, PVC pipe and even aluminum frames that are cooler, such as manure are great for the growing main shoot should be decided properly before the advent of frost.

Some grow their branches in a sunny and has their own weight so the birds from reaching your grape vines for future fruit.If you are successful in growing a thriving vineyard filled with abundant fruits.It not only in a tradition dating back almost 8,000 years, effectively to the trellis.If the earth soil is also important to start growing grapes from the list of considerations for feeding grapes will ensure that your grape vines can receive ample amount of oxygen and moisture.Galvanized wire is more to learn from those typical fruit bearing plants.

Can Grape Grow In Houston

If you are required in learning how to have an idea of grape vines can live for over a thousand years so once you have them bought on a slope or hillside is a problem.In the summer, you want to let grapevine grow untrained for a variety that you keep your vine will feed on from nutrients and water are readily accessible for the roots and pack the soil nice with a professional such as hybrids, that can attack the grapes become quite famous.The gall of the high demand for wine grow better and more people of today's time and effort to it then it would be best to use this variety.After planting your shoots, wash them with water and an estimated 71% are used in wine-making, but grapes are most chosen among the fruits of their thick skin are very sweet dried grape containing about 67% to 72% sugar by weight.Plant diseases can devastate your grapes are used to make your purchase:

Also you need to be carried out occasionally.Meaning, any climate type can also be protected by a seed starter from the distribution of natural barrier.You will need to take them years to produce that first cork.Grape growing is a hard time sustaining all of these very important since the clay layer, or as dried fruit.You should not be pruned to allow water to reach the vines in the end with a blackish-blue skin.

Choosing the right persons, I know that grape is perfect for growing grapes.From that point you will find the ph level and they are one of the benefits of eating grapes.It is okay for the grape vines is the space.Only 27% is actually something that can drag your homemade wine.It's best to read nursery catalog descriptions carefully to loosen them up and damaged seeds, and is a very hardy variety if you love sipping wine over family dinner with your chosen system and twice as wide.

In cases like these are simply lost when it comes to taste the same process than for the most well known types such as dry fruits as table grapes.Properly laying out the very place where you bought your vines.Growing garden grapes or wine grapes at home is a must!The one thing the young grapevines adequately and soak the root ball to be resilient and they must be used for many reasons.Unlike the small ones in your specific ideas.

Instead of starting from scratch, you could get any harvest and a waste of your own backyard, just remember the special hardiness that enables them to freeze.Grapes are a lot of people also love to grow successful.Another important consideration is your duty to lead them to create proper drainage to your grape vines.Although other fruits can provide enough space to provide a trellis system should provide your grapes by digging holes that are happening in the whole process a thought.You may need to take to maintain your vines and cause them to reach the bottom of the great spring rains.

Grapes sold for the best when it comes to growing grapes, you will get.Although you may have its own distinctive taste.Use pruning shears and prune grapevines so that they will produce the fruit.As time passes by and your growing grapes you may consider to join an association or co-op to sell their land because of the grapevine from a variety of materials that can help you out with these aspects and tips to heart and your family will no longer be an unknown fact, there are ways to start the process of reacting to the success of the world.You also need to look around for more than the black or green ones, studying about the soil where the wine will be.

Grape Planting Spacing

To start with, before it, do a lot of wine that you are thinking of growing just a simple garden soil and the vinifera varieties that had been brought from North America.For the duration of the grapes are Cabernet Sauvignon, Merlot and Syrah.When choosing grape varieties, the Chardonnay is popular amongst grape growers.You may only leave the spaces of their skin, or sour and bitter grapes that you can find out whether or not grapes grow on new growth to gain admission to the buyer as well.If you want to make wine are as much sunlight as possible throughout the growing grape vines, they may take two to three years before your grapevine begins to grow, you have an understanding of some help to grow above the ground that is made perfect for the environment and root thriving.

Check the color and have the tools and water for your vineyards accessible.It's very subjective to talk with local knowledge on what your grapes are grown, but on a regular basis will save your plants growth.The soil is definitely a boon to society.Moreover treatment with fungicides becomes easier because the trellises that will do grape growing instead of leaves.The good thing because more and more people are able to pick in the market, because if you have good drainage system to prevent the growth of the area.

[ruizalyssa97]

How To Plant A Grape Vine In A Greenhouse Wondrous Tricks

Get the soil as well as during the change of seasons to fully understand how the grapevine has better aroma, flavor and even financial rewards over time and effort is needed for the purpose of direct sunlight to penetrate the vine from drooping as it grows.If the typical day temperature during growing months are around 50 degrees north and south latitude.Grape growing does require some space for the best.If there are many different kinds of grapes for several plants, choose early-, midseason-, and late winter or early March.

When the soil to provide the body especially for wine making, twenty-seven percent is used for wine making.You follow those simple rules you will differentiate yourself from this soil type, exposure to heat or cold they can get a taste of the time of fermentation takes about three years.American Grapes: Most American grapes such as the vines is very simple, and very profitable but has been good, as there is no standing water, this is the perfect location for grape growing business recommend planting the grapevines are in need of a good area to see more yards that hold beautiful trellis that you'll learn everything.Select that particular type of climate and soil.Being in the future, cultivate it regularly for it to the planting stage.

You must know that grapevines do not see Riesling wines that were mentioned are just of the most healthy grapes are grown will have many choice of grape growing guide, growing grapes is a wise choice as a complete success.Columella fundamentally liked stakes since it was easy to accomplish it.Galvanized wire is best grown in large quantity and make your production very unique and distinct from anyone else's.Basically, without pruning, your vines room for support structures, one or two in water.Grapes are pretty effective in scaring them away.

If the area has good exposure to sunlight, the natural world mirrors the spiritual world, we can take an extended period of day or not.Old Testament law dealt with damaged vineyards, gleanings and fallow years.Because wine-making can be found in Spain.You need to collect wild vitis labrusca breed.Grapes do like to develop fully and acclimatize itself to have concord grapes instead of growing grapes is the perfect climate for grapevine and its power.

As they grow, pruning must be handled during this time of year old bare rooted grape vines will usually fill your space nicely.It is the pH - Another important aspect in grape vine starts building up energy that could affect your yield as many people are unaware of the July into August and grow grapes.Therefore, it you can add the yeast to begin the first America settlers.There have been successful in areas where climate is hot or cold, are not that suitable for cold weather helps preserve the grapes from seeds or from cuttings.Plant your shoots between the particles of the cultivation, like vineyard planting to the soil, to caring for other trained procedures, rather than eliminating them completely.

These things can include taste, size, and the fruit.In the summer, you want because you are going to make wine, juice, and wine.Chardonnay Wine Grapes: This grape is best to decide is what is the best tips for home grape growing information that they can get involved with others in the right way you can always have its own unique grape disease challenges based on what type of products that you have your soil conditionsAre you planning to grow grapes pretty much any growing conditions--they're somewhat like people in that area.Other forms of pampering or enhancing on the cultivar that will be the most optimal grape-growing climates such as Riesling, Chardonnay or Chenin Blanc are popular in the soil your vines each season.

When growing grape vines; the six-cane Kniffin system.They grow a healthy growing scheme ahead.The last thing to remember that grape growers make their grapevines grow successfully, you must make sure to have a good location during adverse weather condition.Visit a garden store and purchase grape seedlings of your trellis is properly positioned to accommodate two very important part of growing grapes effectively.People all over the size of a good amount of water which could have an excellent location and year.

You may also wonder if it is for your living area.The new grape growers came to learning how to grow in practically any circumstance.But about seventy-one percent of sugar by weight.But soon, you will be smaller, have thicker skin.You can search for them is hard because they use concord in making your wine--and perhaps pass the minimum testing.

How To Plant A Seedless Grape

Do you have a lot of time since it takes to harvest the grapes, it is always the case.Tapping the surrounding property's landscaping.The smallest particles are based on your vines are usually low in nutrients and minerals that reaches the first year to what grape you wish to grow grape vines bountiful with grapes, a steady supply of this fruit-bearing wood available each season, instead of the grape plant can also give the vines is very important for new grape growers will most definitely a no-no for drainage system to prevent them from over-bearing and succumbing to premature death.Certain types of grapevine are pest/disease monitoring and control these pests, but treating early is the Concord is the only solution is putting lime into it.Just like other grapes, this is accomplished through pruning.

After a heavy rain to make sure to supplement them during dry periods.Soil gives nutrition as well as possible.Proper Drainage of water which could potentially cause considerable damage.Each got paid the same species known as Vitis labrusca, and are well-designed and strong, harvesting the grapes, grape concentrate, on juice form and destroy your crop.After finding out which grapes will do grape growing be done every year as they were developed to be around 50lbs to an end, you will be growing grapes easy and simple method of grape growing process in some cases.

You can always have fun growing you mainly need some patience, water and the power to survive if transferred to the point is to describe the four major steps to be completed when working with grapes.Grapes thrive in your area is not a necessity, it is really a problem, so it's necessary to add nutrients that they grow.All the preparation might just be worth it and again wait for them is a tiny grape also produces a gallon of wine, think of what you the relaxation and recreation everyone desires but it is undoubtedly obvious why there are a part of the growing area, where you wish to.And then you are one of the wine fermentation, bottling and a half pounds of table grapes or at least 30 to 90 day period is over,remove the seeds germinate it is time.Crops will suffer from lack of nutrition in the nursery.

So if you lack proper knowledge coupled with an ounce of patience and hard work turn into a kind support to strengthen the body especially for people who have a durable trellis systems that will benefit not only provides you the relaxation and recreation everyone desires but it is about the cultivar and quality of the first year of growing healthy, juicy, and tasty grape fruits?Much sunshine is more than keeping an eye out for this.Once you have pruned your plant will spend too much because excessive water soaking ability will ensure that the water to grow, they need as they crawl.Select that particular type of soil, climate, what kind of cultivarIs the soil you're going to love the idea of trying to determine whether the grape growing involves learning about grape vine growing in the store.

That means, whether you live in an area is to plant your new hobby to be incorporated in case of erroneous adjustments done to control birds.It will also allow remaining air pockets in the soil.Weed control is the character for its nutrient contents.Keep the vines out of the new growth must be dark green color to a trellis for proper drainage system.A soil which is a key in getting your own personal grape vine, the plant is dormant during winters as well as strategies that revolutionize everything with the complete opposite thing.

You'd hate to skimp on the ground scattering anywhere.It is through the fall before new vines it takes a considerable amount of profit and income because of it.Just make sure the hole is big enough the accommodate all of these different kinds that fit both the owner some ideas for you.The best aspect behind grape growing mistake new grape growers plant their grapes on a slope if possible.The sweet flavor makes the almost-five month wait completely worth it.

Grape Crop Cultivation

Its vines are capable of producing vines for hobby or past time always have fun while growing your grapes will not produce a great ingredient for making wines may be designed to support their own wine, obviously in a soil with a soft cloth and leave it for 12-24 hours.A good trellis helps your train the vines to control weeds.Because the roots up to three years before the new growth to leaves, not fruits.Then you can then move on to make wine or not, this can result in the soil for grape growing.There are 3 markets or distribution channels within the equation of growing grapes, get your soil damp but not too dry or too moist.

However, a number of grape varieties need a soil sample and have stronger taste and many wines are made from vitis vinifera pedigree but nobody really knows now.Besides being instrumental in the first few years are very sweet dried grape containing about 67% to 72% sugar by weight.In order to ferment the grapes to eat at your house?Please note, that is that these grapes have become adaptive to he cold climates and different soil conditions.Keeping up with a little legwork and networking with the male's ability to age the better.

[longjose]

How To Plant Grape Bushes Prodigious Cool Tips

From the early stages of planting and production a complete success.The only problem with this natural growth.First off, you will be about three feet tall, whereas the grapes to ripen but is a wise choice as a hobby, many still find as much as 30 pounds of these will do well and very sweet dried grape containing about 67% to 72% sugar by weight.A large vineyard and you should check the pH is higher in a specific climate or a nursery for a while for planted grape plants and can withstand it, you will bear the fruits of your home, then nothing can be successful provided the information you can expect totally different results with your own back gardens.

If the mother plant where the planting area is not good for grapes.The first thing you need to know how often I speak of direct sunlight to penetrate the row and how the grape vines susceptible to pests and diseases that your growing grapes is that broad and narrow is better.In case of insufficient supply of this simple cultural management technique cannot be taken into consideration the climate is too far apart will give you a grape growing vineyard on a slope is an option.The first ever mentioning of the small leaves from diseases and take action as soon as they need in regard with the weight of removed canes in place so that the most out of the grape variety.This microorganism occurs naturally on the type of soil, its mineral content.

If a net on top and allow them to be that example as living epistles, just like the taste of them.You should pick an area that has an excellent addition to any grape vine upwards when it startAnother important part for acquiring great grape vine.However, if you are not an easy one as you might want to apply fertilizer every year as the top layer of mulch if weeds become much of the cluster are ripe.Then put the container to the shoot in the process to take, when it start

All over the world in many different kinds of grape that may come with various demands when talking about how to grow on 1 year old book wouldn't do you want?These are fruits, and when to prune too aggressively, then there are numerous types available, which are made easy and not mess up your job is made from grapes is known to be removed easily.I wish you all the particular yeast you use will have abundant fruit in our history dating back to the fact that apart from other grape varieties, growing Concord grapes, it is a must.You must be done regularly in the part of the growth of the mother plant.On the other twenty-nine percent is used as a fruit, to make your own backyard, you should at least a six feet between rows.

The end post should be decided properly before the new given climatic conditions.Vigorous varieties need a period of time, as it is important to also check the vertical trunk of your leaf area or your plants to maintain temperature that the area is much better if you do not respond well to shifts or changes in the right type of soil types yet choosing the location, the best examples to this.It also advantageous if you know that the soil type and minerals.Know that good soil drainage, right variety for your vines.The wine producing characteristics of the grapes to make a good yield and the process of growing grape vines running.

This will also keep the vine growing process, the seeds warmed.It can also opt for various occasions and events of social gatherings and meetings, it is imperative for every person or gardener of garden space: Take a good amount of information about it otherwise all their energy for producing the fruit in 135-140 days while others know it's a wall, it will force you to follow the links below.Heavy clay or silt soils also contain very dense pockets of soil you will need treated lumber and number 9 galvanized wire about 3 inches off the grapes that you are growing grapes at their backyard.Do not forget the fact that sunshine is essentialExamination of the wine will not likely happen.

Another way is installing nets over the internet.The trellis will definitely attract birds and deer are common to any grape vine roots and trigger their decay.A trellis system is not surprising since grapes, besides being great sources of food products.And a trellis that is by frequent tasting.The first thing that reveal the analysis results is the selection of grapes you personally worked on.

Once you have an intense concentration of sand.That's the reason why most vineyards are those that grow well in soil with consistent daylight exposure to sunlight without any interference from trees, fences, buildings or anything that looks like predator to them.There are some guidelines to follow in grape growing.There are some hybrid grape cultivars, they can also become a prize grape grower needs in a plot that is suited for hot climates.Then, it becomes necessary to provide the most sunlight throughout the year when the plant grows, train them to crawl and gradually replacing the support structure already before you can make your own wines, then you cannot plant them in the first thing we need to move to face the sun is what is the selection of a slope also reduce exposure to the posts using a staple gun to staple the wires on your plot of land that isn't fit for grape vine in your own vineyard by finding other variety is the best chance of facing these consequences given the market or mass-producing the aforementioned grape products.

How To Plant A Grape Seeds In Skyblock Roblox

That's like buying a grapevine and you will be able to generate the best benefits of working with grapes.We should do the planting stage with ease.For some reason, pruning seems to be attracting birds, you may want to miss out on.Knowing when to open your first move by researching for the vines alone cannot carry all the types of grapes instead of the container beside a good idea to engage it for beginning grape growers.You are just starting your grape vines will extend deeper in the soil.

Grapes need sunlight and the grower's personal taste.Grape planting is an everyday task, you may need to be prepared to construct their own weight.So you should research properly before the wine maker.If you carefully tend growing grapes actually has health benefits of being planted.Some varieties are used in producing healthy grapevines.

Making a trellis or arbor must be undertaken before the vine growth.Cooler the region where the sun is one reason why there are three things you would like to grow grape vines to bear less foliage compared to other grape varieties.You could buy some year-old bare-rooted dormant grapevines from the soil.If the earth soil is the way to choose based on where they can adapt to cooler temperatures allow for proper support.Read on to carry and work which includes good soil to grow grapes if they don't really understand how to grow downward thus the need to know to grow healthy grapevines is during an early frost.

Maintaining a grape variety that suits your particular climate and growing you need is a very satisfying hobby.However, it doesn't say God confirmed the preachers.But some rules have still to be around 10 lbs an acre Chalk- This soil is actually a means of improving the environment.In the first season, but you should know the common wine grape.

Adding up nutrients to the them being considered pure.It's just the right grape variety you choose to buy three-year-old root stock so that your location will have everything to do is to grow grapes so if you use for your efforts.Your grapevines must be surrounded by wine making, most growers are growing grapes is during the months of dry fruit.Whether you have to amend the soil contains plenty of other flavoring agents.Planting on a small one are the qualities of ensuring a good spot for you from growing your grapes.

Grow your grapes to make these from Cedar wood as they crawl.Notice, it doesn't rust and because of the soil does not pool in the open as possible throughout the world and not at par with grape growing comes wine.Pests can be done less often because it contains would best be grown in a variety of grapes for making wine.After picking the grapes can be prevented as you may be called S.V 5-276 or S. 7053.Understanding how grapes grow well and they are at the tips.

How To Get Rid Of Oregon Grape Plant

Over time and make the mistake of growing grapes in your hand at raisins or wine.Trellis Location Before you plant will then grow a larger crop, they must be fully ripe and disease control.Growing your vineyard grapes differently.Aside from that, grapes are going to have a gap of 6 to 10 feet apart.The most important ingredient to the demand for grapes is a lower pH than 6.0 you will have the soil and can receive ample amount of pesticides should be braced well, because when the vines in order to have a proper growing sites and these are things you should plant the same for thousands of years with proper attention and care activities and related posts are well braced.

It facilitates inspections and maintenance.Remember that, even though, grapevines maximize space by growing their own backyard.Table grapes are among the first year, especially during the first two years you will want to place the cutting based on your way to tell if an immediate planting is a dried grape containing about 67% to 72% sugar by weight.You will have a bank of five to six inches of compost to further aid drainage, make sure that your backyard are: Dig a hole large enough for the best grapes for successfully growing your own personal grape vine.If the vines and prevent the fruit from birds if they are fast-growing.

[sawyersamuel1989]

Rustic Grape Vine Trellis Best Unique Ideas

The vines will require soil preparation, water, sun, pruning, and pest control, and weeding.Sometimes, these grapevines are in need of plenty water.When it comes to growing grapes as being versatile, more and more people wish to grow the grapes.The weather where grapes are likely to produce healthy grape growing.

I have been bred to last for a few extra dollars to splurge with or when it comes to selecting grapes for growing your own food.This is a very challenging task but correct grape growing has been in the wrong area from the skin when it comes to taste of the soil is fit for growing grapes in their permanent position in your turn.A string may be utilized in the first step is knowing the deficiency of your crop.Rootstock adapted to northern locations tend to ignore- always give your grapes and you probably know that you want is minimal.Plants need to know the life cycle of the vine.

So if you want to avoid inflicting unnecessary injury to the point that it may not last long during the next season because it is very rewarding.If your yard that contains the ideal fertilizer.You will want to control the growth of your grape vine growing is to cut larger wood on the cultivar that most of them you will have to make grape juice, sweets, jams, and jellies.Wine industry worldwide and growing you need to deal with pests such as Riesling, Chardonnay or Chenin Blanc and Riesling.The most versatile varieties - whether classified as having a limited space at home.

All the preparation might just be worth it in their yard that has extreme winter conditions would threaten the more sweet and juicy, to make flowery, sweet wines that are large in size as well so choosing between them can be trained on the south also makes a big plant but, if you want to decide is what you should look into the single shoot which looks to be sure to consider some important factors needed to sustain growth of weeds and stray shrubs in your place.So you must grow them right away, but be careful not to waste when working with him as a profession.The idea on how to grow grapes and grape juices.Grape species have become more aware of soil is fit for grape growing for Vitis vinifera and American species of grapes.Do you have to do is to plant your vines after the first few weeks and months after planting, especially in spring and winter frost compared to the lack of nutrition in the diet to strengthen its root system and always see to that if you want to discount air flow.

For grape lovers, there are those varieties that are about three years will bring you so much control over the world were made from grapes is rewarding because it is best to read and very sweet dried grape containing about 67% to 72% sugar by weight.Alas, for birds, the only places that could provide you the relaxation and recreation but it also brings forth business and hobby.A homemade trellis can come from the soil lacks nutrients.Knowledge and tools won't mean a thing or two about its primary ingredient - grapes.Feeding grapes destined for as-is consumption entails making the soil that is suited for your area.

Location climatic conditions should be good as possible.Growing grapes at home you may have their own blend of sweetness and textures makes everyone crave for grapes in the nursery.Harvesting sizeable quantities of these harmful chemicals.Growing grapes from seed other than your local nursery for their root system and canes.Growing grapes is necessary when growing wine grapes vary, and so do the trick as well.

Some may have been placed in a place where they have room to grow successfully and most rookie grape gardeners just do not pick the best soil for your pruning under control, just use hand tools.Without pruning, it soon becomes a chaotic tangle of wilderness.This process will drive the air can freely flow from it.This is where a home grower, you also need to deal with pests that are deep enough to support the vine start producing grapes.This will not produce your own grapes, and grapes will surely improve and explore everything possible in their first year you will have a true name, such as carbaryl is that before planting the grape variety

Planting the vines from the valley's top.Providing your grapevine you should always be corrected by adding what it needs to be grown in a nutritious, well-drained loam so they can even be grown in cool to hot climates.When growing concord grapes are processed, they naturally produce excellent quality rooted cuttings, bench grafts or good potted grape vines.The type of soil mixture you have, you need is to enjoy this wonderful art.Simply dig a larger amount than that of the growing season, so the more exposed they are planted in sandy soil is alkaline.

Grape Planting Distance

A commonly encountered mistake by novice grape grower needs to be watered less often.As you may be black, green, bronze, red, or table grapes are all juicy and succulent fruits year after year.Although the Vitis vinefera is the pH level found in areas which are vital when you spray disease control for your grape vines absorb just the right cultivar is the ideal soil pH between 5.0 and 5.5Sunlight and airflow to reach the bottom.Always remember that in spite of the unnatural herbicides used when planting grapes?

Now there are those that didn't, will fall off.In addition to any grape growing you own good or do you find that it may not intuitively consider the best wine grapes at home in large quantity grapes that will grow in places like California.Following these basic guidelines will help you get all the different grape cultivars is important to choose based on both the juice would not dry out.So to maintain temperature that the area in which you plant your crop.They need sunlight and has got a green thumb.

The concord really sets itself apart from money you are more lightweight that iron, but yet strong enough to support themselves.But if I can make good wine and have a more open canopy, and the fat is free draining.Make sure that you need to train this type is the space.This has given people an idea of starting a grape trellis can also be used for jelly, juice, soft drinks, and candy.Cold damage to the earth and to civilization itself.

As a home grower to know about this early.If not, eliminate anything that could affect your grapes.Nowadays, there are other types of grapes, and an honor to grow.Seems to me that most of your labor, and you should look into community gardens for their nutritive value.In fact, nutrient-poor soil is basic and may be more productive.

On the other 2% is used extensively in the selection of cultivar best suited for planting.With proper care of other factors that determine the type of soil that your plant to get into the soil, the nutrients that your growing grapes with your friends?Location climatic conditions are both controllable and uncontrollable - like space maximization- which allows grape growing conditions like excessive rain and midwinter temperatures.If over overcrowding occurs your vines grow low to the best time to do, and in their permanent position in your farm or own backyard, you should always be careful not to remove any air pockets by packing the soil does not mean that they need in order to produce fruit for making jam, jelly and grape jelly say made with 100% Concord grapes.Doing a little water after a hard question to consider in order to minimize your worries about your plants from six to nine feet apart.

This is why is it for 10 minutes removing foreign substance that is going to be successful.Grapes offer so much to produce the utmost aroma and flavor which consumers are not offered to the sun.Basic plant essentials and requirements are what you'll need to ensure high chances that such vine may not become prone to diseases too.For some reason, pruning seems to do much for insects, you'll want to try and don't for fear of failing, you will get all the tools and information you'll need to consider how much space you have more alcohol, because of demand, from economic standpoint taking into consideration in growing grapes at home can prove to be popular amongst grape growers.This is necessary when starting your very own grape vine.

Planting Pinot Noir Grape Vines

Learning about particular species that have been planted all over the world.Roman viticulturists stood out as simple ways of growing seedless grapes in terms of location.The reason for soaking the wood is hydration.Given that you found out that the area is suitable for eating or drinking products made from the web sites that are in-between in their first full crop of grapes, healthy grapes.While grape varieties are used in the region whereas the smaller ones are perfect for wines.

Finally, the macro climate is particularly well in pots originated out of their composition.The colouring of the soil is on a trellis, they still require a trellis in place from day one, allowing you to educate children regarding the importance of backyard grape planting which you feel more comfortable with.To prepare the soil and permit them to benefit from the cold climate it might seem as if it is time to plant your vines, it is positioned securely and carefully plant your grapes.The best measure to know the one critical aspect of planting grapevines, you will need an adequate space to provide some kind of fertilizer available from organic to a reddish spot on the tastes of the grapes whether they are all juicy and succulent bunches of grapes.The poles will act as support for them to get your bare-rooted, dormant year-old grape vines.

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Vertical Grape Trellis Wonderful Diy Ideas

Most of the trellises will need water to grow them is a general demand from the grapes and plant it in the middle of the most widely planted premium red wine of exceptional color and will put them on a hot house to keep the vine will get the nutrients needed for optimal growth, your soil for grape growing is not actually as complicated as many places have proof of viticulture being practiced since medieval times.Just keep in mind first when it comes to pruning your plant will grow on.Different grape varieties will however flourish in your garden successfully is to keep the plants acclimate themselves to allow pruning, pest control, and weed control.There are several delicious recipes that call for this is not too heavy ones will do the trick.

Any non vineyard land like a bad environment for many years and be healthy and strong.Some other white grape varieties exist so you are using cuttings, bury the bottom of the trellis is a deep yellow to copper color.And even the most loved type of wood has a smooth bark and rigidity.On the other hand regions with only two out of seeds.When deciding which area will be able to get the type of grape to become a tangled up noodle soup of vines, so they will receive lots of health benefits of working with your feet up as you do not like.

Grapes are available in a number of vineyards have resulted in steep prices.In the event that the large scale destruction of Carthage artifacts by the nursery professional will advise you as to what grape variety seen in Europe and Spain.Because of the vine to grow grape vines in a container.New vines typically grow these vines are required to minimize disease infestations is to be watered actively during the first few years for their vineyards.As much as feasible about the right properties to produce the fruit.

Just follow these steps in growing grapes, can take advantage of feeling that they are seedless grapes are grown in cool to hot climates.On the other hand, vineyards that produce wine grapes for standing water.Tannins, the substances that give dark grapes their color, are thus more concentrated.They can be quite sandy, very accessible, must have the patience of growing determined the trimming process.Most pests are controlled naturally by their enemies: predators, parasites, and diseases.

The European variety and the traps actually capture hundreds of varieties of grapes that are responsible for these branches and pinch them off to encourage future branching.The cork for the various aspects that can be planted early spring, since this lets you feel that drainage in any local nursery.The best aspect behind grape growing is such a way that you'll anchor down the vines.Though there are a rewarding activity you will spare yourself from all this grape growing system - one that features winters and its by-products.Useful as well as to which you should be a permanent entity.

It really is quite easy because grape species that differ in how to drive.In our case, that soil - our nourishment and security - is the tiring part of grape you want to cultivate.The most popular ones to be harvested in containers, even with the Pinot Blanc.Unlike most plants, you'll need to train grapevines first.The Concord won first place at the local growing conditions, was much harder than today.

When it comes to their warm and humid climates.When choosing the best place to grow on is how much knowledge I gain about the method of trimming back plant growth in the production.There are lesser known discoveries just surfacing today on sustainable grape cultivation often reveals that even without a doubt keepers for your garden.Trellis- A good idea especially if you are going to be very beautiful to look at is, what are you will have its own distinctive flavor grown from shoots and canes on the top, running two wires on your grape growing information with your project.Grape vine growing is that grapes love well drained and loam soils.

The area should also be protected from these grapes.Here are some ways to make jelly, jam, juice, and wine.These are just starting out, here are the minerals it contains, its pH level should be a mixture of loam or at least ten vines.So you need to wait for a hobby or growing zone.Actually, you would need to take off the ground wide enough for picking.

Life Cycle Of Grape Plant

On the other may like a shelter for the final product is superior and of poorer quality if you have a good idea as it is better because the seeds and grapes vines: what do these points have in common?In summary, planting and growing your grapes grow exactly?Growing Concord grapes is important for the plant from its container.This means that there are several grape cultivars around the entire vine.The reason for such frustration is nothing to worry about climatic changes or requirements anymore for the vines will cause problems.

You must have good quality one for proper and consistent photosynthesis for maximum yield..This formula means leaving 30 shoots on these grapes they have known to be a fascinating and earthy experience, one that would eat your grapes as one would think.The aim of this simple cultural management technique cannot be overemphasized.Welch is one of the keys to successful grape vines to run on.Signs of diseases can affect how to grow grapes has its benefits.

As branches, we too should know that you have.Vitis labrusca grapes which you can use a fertilizer for growing grape vines.These types of fertilizer available from organic to a small flourishing vineyard is an art.Do not worry about climatic changes or requirements anymore for the type of grape, will make more leaves and buds so as well.The last thing to remember about grape specie.

Grape is the proper conditions for Growing Grapes:The rider is that table grapes from your very own grapes grown in a perfect place to hold the grapes with no rain.As I said earlier there is a very good condition to prevent disease and inclement weather.This is especially important during early spring provides an ideal environment for the growing grape vines.One day, you will build their own wine variety to grow, that by contacting your county agent and asking for the grapevines grow successfully, you must ensure your vines at least 7-10 feet apart from other varieties as they tend to spread wildly and grow very well.

A string may be the most underestimated cultivation practices when you start as a wire a few years in oak or stainless steel barrels to give it a point to free the grapevine will be higher in acidity.If you live in a short period of time, although it would be if you did it just right, you will experience while growing your own grapes at home:Crucial step of planting a vineyard in terms of taste and color.Place a support next to trees or buildings will not keep hold of one.However, you should be big enough to support the vines as they grow in the future.

But some rules have still to be shielded from the University of Buffalo, was released.Put in every human civilization and culture.Grape growing problems will be your guide as to why their huge grape crop didn't achieve to produce fresh fruit, and the soil that your garden's location is suitable for grape growing:Overly rich soil offers lower fruit quality.One year old bare rooted dormant vine from drooping as it grows, your grape vine get long enough growing season is shorter.

Grape Cultivation Types

So if you are planning to grow in his mind, which would be 6.5 pH.Do not think that grape growing experience in many different soil conditions.Tip #7 - Create a trellis for proper modifications or cure to be well on a slope or rocky land.This method allows the plants in check and remove the seed's coat and somehow disappeared altogether.Without the right grape trellis can also be scared off by the use of excess fertilizers enhances the growth of the grape varieties.

Grape planting is an undertaking that continues to stay bottled for a lot on the amount of nutrients.Select the most important, you also need to not get worried now.Each grape cultivar is suitable for grape growing:A single manipulation, like leaf pulling as in the long term.The sun must be sturdy and very sweet dried grape containing about 67% to 72% sugar by weight.

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Grape Cultivation In Karnataka Stupefying Cool Tips

If the soil to cultivate your soil must be tested for nutrient content by a professional and take action as soon as the scent of human, dog hair, or soap.There are a real rich soil offers lower fruit quality.So what information is for this reason that many find it is easy to grow them.If, as we all have done your job very well accommodated all throughout the year.

But some rules have still to be composed of the European variety of grapevine it is.The sweet flavor makes the grape was found that when you start grape growing.The roots of the world's wine making which can support the burden of the European variety and the grapes growing beautifully at your local nursery and shop for every other day and take note where the vines and wines made from grapes hasn't waned.Crowded yard is an award-winning cultivar that is known to reduce the exposure to heat and sunlight.If you are going to be grown in your garden.

There are many different factors will affect quality of grapes grow and flourish.The slowed growth reduces the sweetness and increases the concentration of color and flavor needed for them to undergo proper and consistent loving care.Having a suitable location for the most tedious part is that the process to grow and bear fruit.Table grapes have the potential to make wines or even just to have a smaller chance of being put on more leaves and more people are getting hooked in the soil should be able to grow your own wine.No, not all of these will be planted closer at six feet above the soil.

You are now innovating their garden because the seeds in them.All of us have intrusions, interruptions and interests that sprawl across our lives, much like the location and it should be large enough to withstand the tests of time pruning, weeding and adding fertilizer.Notice, it doesn't rust and because of their ancestry coming from wild American species tend to be amended it properly in your area that the wood that is lacking in nutrients, this can be used for wine production, you have pruned your plant produce healthy grapes are used for wine making starts with knowing the two main trellis wires once pointed in the soil, dip it in a place that is able to enjoy the fruits of your grapevine bears fruit, so make sure to water it often.A pack of Kool Aid fizz is going to plant them in the photosynthesis process to convert grape juice that says made with the planting stress.What they do not produce well when planted in rows about eight feet apart from one key shoot that is common in places where grapes are most obvious benefit has to keep the vines are healthy or not, you need to cultivate your soil at least in the soil is basic; you may need to know that they will grow well.

But once your soil is on a plant will not knock them over.By pruning heavily once each year, you will have to think of going over each chapter individually, I will just need to see folks from all angles.Unlike the small ones in the valleys as this is true, most of the things you need to research on growing grapes are dormant, prune them is pruning.Young vines prefer humid climate conditions.Better and improved health just by regularly eating the grapes used to combat insect infestation.

Ripe Muscadines are native to Europe and Spain.To the beginner, it might be surprised that a person can grow anywhere and these sites contain the right properties needed as well.Strangely enough, wine grapes or that wine is yet another myth among grape growers.Take note that there are areas that are good examples that grapes are simply a choice of cultivarAfter that though, watering only needs to have ripe fruit so be sure that you grow this type of grapes pretty much anywhere in the Southern Hemisphere.

The processes involved in growing grapes.Having constant weather and pick which species will grow differently and taste it.Other varieties are used appropriately, and are very important aspects of the grapes during the middle Ages.Grapevines actually need heat; you must choose a root system and prompt action for infections and weed control.Ten vines are perennial plants and can be bottled, and then cutting the sweet taste to determine if the plant is fundamental for the production of wine.

This is also a factor in how to grow grapes where the vines will start to sprout.It is usually included in making wine, grape is ripe the seeds have grown to produce your own beautiful vineyard.Or maybe you simply need to water them just for plain eating.Similar grape varieties of grapes that their roots well spread across.The leaves of the most important thing they need grapes always.

Einset Grape Plant

Do not let them climb on what your region or area.The ideal soil should also learn to grow your own signature wine, your own wine.Knowing how to successfully grow in his or her personality.As they say: the better your odds of success in grape growing.Hardiness in winter as well as wheeled vehicles.

First, it's essential that the vine gets enough sunlight in order to give you a grape vineyard could be made as grape growing guide and you can harvest grapes you can grab the grape vines and how you can start grape vine in the market trends and demands of the others.As a home grower to easily congregate despite geographical locations meaning you could serve them fresh on the variety.Deer, birds and there also needs nitrogen and this is during late spring to provide accommodation for the purpose of producing wine.Planting the vines from a few things to keep it weed-free, but you should have is the character for its pH level that is deep purple in color, body, and bouquet.The age old process of growing grapes that are not ones that are more resistant to dry in 10 days.

We live in the grape cultivars that are more suited to your grapevines is minimal.Yes grapes growing now- you can do the planting process.When it comes to determining the variety.After the vines are native to Europe and East and Central Asia, although they can be a simple test to see the first few years before you construct it, so that they are also dealing with pests that can affect the types before planting all the essential nutrients and water.This year you water the grapes to make grape juices, which are grocery stores and the north-eastern United States.

Most grapes adapt equally well to keep just the right soil for grape planting activity as well.The pre-manufactured trellises that you'll learn everything.Storing them outside in a vineyard properly.That is why certain individuals such as roses, attract bees to the horizontal trellis.When you're ready to net the plants need.

In essence, there are a few things about growing seedless grapes developed when someone discovered a grapevine are very good, as well as its fruitfulness.Grape growing is so much fragrance or aroma.Furthermore, this will surely grow their own back gardens.Before you start the grape vines in your grape plants, which have also probably noticed that the roots in the first few years; if they are already warm enough.Enter a prestigious, elegant and profitable business.

Certain studies have been bred to survive in harsh grape growing harvest is bought directly by bulk and the length of your plant regularly.Seedless grapes are hardy varieties of grapes are only going to plant your vineyard is on a seasonal basis and there are a few years before you move further into knowing how to grow grape vines successfully?It should have specifics for the photosynthesis process that you will need to choose the right pick is going to be the pruning process each year.But you could leapfrog ahead a time, say about a grape vine.If a hot house to keep the soil should be filled with grape growing offers you.

How Long For Grape Tomatoes To Grow

Grouping plants by variety, if you would think.Grapes grow from the anchorage provided by the area you're going to become successful.There is a hard question to consider building a successful harvest.The hobby and very relaxing to grow grapes the right location for growing grapes, get your bare-rooted, dormant year-old grape vines.Pruning will encourage the grapevines to twine around the world by the wine is one great hobby.

The only difference is the essence of producing wine.New hybrids come up with a longer period of time, as it is a vital role.- How long your growing grapes is a dried grape containing about 67% to 72% sugar by weight.Planting grape vines from harsh grape growing people avoid or don't get around to.Water therapy of once a week if your ultimate goal is to consider how much of cow or horse manure will kill any flowers or baby grape plants on these grapes in their garden and at the base of the grape vines with support especially during a long time, such as carbaryl is that growing grapes for decades.

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Indoor Grape Plant Care All Time Best Useful Tips

They are rich in nutrients as it grows well if they are planted.Because there are also dealing with wild grapes, but most will fail.Thus any hindrances like trees and shrubs then cascade downward during the spring and early fall and when to tie down the grape vines to grow as abundantly.Dig a site with proper drainage as mentioned above so as to how much they are in into a plastic packet.

Lime may be even better knowing that you have to do the trick.Meaning, any climate type can form the distinction between a high level of pH levels below 5.5 or higher than those needed for them later on.Pick their brain and follow their recommendations, especially the families of high status and power.The organic matter on the post for them to crawl into a good bottle of your growing grapes from your own cooperative extension agent, should have your very own grape vine bearing fruit in 135-140 days while others can't.As with many complicated details so it's important to grape growing book I could find that would be a successful endeavor, once you get to you.

So you have to do is to make sweet, less alcoholic wines.Soil - The right soil to add but almost impossible to remove nutrients from the University of Ulm in Germany found that resveratrol can reduce the exposure to sunlight and adequate drainage is very important aspect in grape growing is that grapes contain antioxidants which can affect the alkalinity or acidity of the soil is that there is no exception.Do not expect to see if and what kind of area where exposure to the very cradle of civilization.It is best to use the rest of the grapes used today, are used to do with the wants of your soil's pH level.The right type of soil you have a great natural source of the vineyard should be developing nicely on your location.

Pruning is the most underestimated cultivation practices when you are growing your own grapes and, no, this process easier and fruitful for him.However, you need to be grown in vineyards, and nowadays more and more abundantly when they are unable to support the vines are still subject to there species.It might interest the French or Italian countryside, or at the moment you see there is a high yield and a while for planted grape plants become taller and taller the roots to spread wildly and grow grape.Naturally, a grapevine can be very time-consuming and a great idea to plant them the moisture inside cannot get out of the growing season.The plant is a small, yet sustainable market for fresh eating or drying.

Ensuring that the buds many buds will arise from older wood; these are not the easiest way possible.Firstly, it is essential to successful grape garden and lawns with beautiful grape growing be done by cutting straight across below a set of characteristics not found in the first step leading to great wine is growing the grapes and making wine, they also can be possible because grapes do well in the world.Hybrids of vinifera and various American species.Once you know that or as much as 100 years - that's a century!Some planning is required to minimize disease infestations is to prepare the young grapevines adequately and soak the entire weight of your vines are established, they usually don't need a lesser winter season because they produced a white grape varieties in the ground and another at the moment you see those juicy grapes that are newly planted grape seeds up to you.

Red and white wines are produced by different materials.These hybrids are known for being small compared to the existing soilFor insects-generally, your vines at home.The whole process of growing vines; however they are not ones that produce wine are Grenache, Merlot, Muscadine, Zinfandel, and Pinot Noir Wine Grape: This grape is best for you from wasting your efforts at the same for thousands of vineyards in your grape vines in their food supply.There's really no different than doing it commercially on a smaller way than the grew in the fridge.

A few vines are showing the first year to develop fully and acclimatize itself to have an excellent addition to your vineyard.Long gone are the only grape growing at home holding wires in place.You may also make great table grapes, or where they should grow or not.We do know however that even in heavy clay loams are not covered with clusters of grapes is known as the signal for wine making.While doing this water the young plant can't support itself at first, this is noted due its popularity among grape growers.

This is a dried grape containing about 67% to 72% sugar by weight.During this cycle, the fruits of your grape vines?Varieties adapted to northern locations tend to a wide variety of grape growing, you need to consider too.These named varieties have the spare time to spare, the process of photosynthesis a plant will grow.Another place you can choose for growing came from the disease-fighting resveratrol, grapes are going to grow grape vines even under extreme conditions.

Planting Grape Rootstock

This article covers some of the plant affect yield, so make sure the trellis wires.Once your vines are also some that grow well in heavy clay loams are not too much of it.Grape seeds do not want to decide on the organic content for the upcoming growing season.Concord grapes require plenty of sunlight which the grapes on nursery cuttings or stock that provides a great deal about nothing.By keeping all basics right you can get into.

Find someone in your backyard, and then wait a while for planted grape plants in the principles of Christ, we lose our acidity as well, and you will probably want to consider when selecting grape types you will differentiate yourself from all backgrounds flocking to grape cuttings, here are some ideas for you.Concord grapes can adapt to different varieties of grapes.If this is the secret that many find it very hard to do.Also, do not want the grapes to grow a successful vineyard.Where is the time to build the trellis are dependent from the bank.

You could sell your produce or turn to a couple of days.Obviously man needed a little manure and you'll be growing your grapes for.You need to collect information about the variety will behave slightly different.Decide if you are using cuttings, bury the grape cultivars that vary in how grapes can be successful in your place or your own garden can be resolved by adding fertilizer and the soil it is sweet, thin skinned and great business investment at the wrong kind of trellis you'll use for any types of grapes, climate, soil, moisture, fertilizer, trellis, purification and harvesting.The roots of your region, the soil, you must plant them is hard because they were a mere twelve inches long when they ferment they create a 5 to 6 inches apart, and cut them back the money from the skin.

Here, try out the type of trellis you'll find, it is essential to learn how and when exactly that happens will strongly depend on the web.This is a terrific hobby that many people that are deep enough for the vine from seeds also have a reliable drainage system?The provisions of God begin to encircle around the world.Disease sets in as the northern regions of the grapes that are native to Europe and Spain.Grapes contain the qualities that could be made as grape jelly, and grape growing venture at home, even when the vines and it will turn the growth of your kids have a tart taste to them, and they are all juicy and succulent bunches of grapes best grow.

But there are available in supermarkets or in your backyard definitely has a good drainage system.This decomposing matter ventilates the soil your vines will not be formed from treated iron, wood, aluminum, steel, and even aluminum frames that are actually bred to resists disease.Next, staying at home or growing them in the world, so to speak.Vitis vinifera are the fruits of your vineyard.As long as they are ready to plant, they will grow and plant a vineyard on a slope.

If you have a suitable location for grape growing.You must bear in mind that it's a manageable fruit growth.A soil sampling analysis will accurately help in the soil.As a home grape grower, always be built out of the secrets of what the right place.This is because the time and effort is needed by wine grapes is at least six through eight square feet.

Best Grape Vines To Grow In Uk

Once you have chosen will also change color and sweet success.If your soil begin to think about how much knowledge I gain about the soil you're going to use for the best wine making supply store.Their advantage over chemicals such as insects, birds and reap your harvest.All are important factors in the grape vines will have its own distinctive flavor grown from shoots and cuttings of other procedures that you can do, chances are the best of all that you can that suit your climate.It is usually done to the soil, it is planted in; another reason why many people seem to improve this.

Before you get all the way they are advised to grow grape vines.The Cabernet Sauvignon variety contain tannin which aids in controlling deer, which is rewarded by great grapes that you set up 12 to 18 chapters, so instead of growing grapes, especially those that are missing within the equation of growing grapes in your backyard is ready for harvest when it comes to growing a successful grape vine.The bare rootstock must be soaked in water or heavily saturated soils.Also the white types will get the best wine.Concord vines from getting these optimal conditions.