#3. set shape keys to work on one side only 4. set mirror again but this time on bisect mode which is slightly less work than cutting the

[bunniestial]

MILKSHAKES & HEARTACHES

L.F x ChildhoodBestFriend!Reader

Summary: You hated Felix. You hated how he was successful and how you weren't. You hated how is voice echoed on every radio. You hated how he forgot about you when he got a taste of fame. When Stray Kids rents out the American themed diner you work at for a music video, repressed feelings bubble back up.

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★ Chapter 2: Ancient History ★

The key felt unusually heavy in your hand as you approached the diner. It was 8:30 a.m., and your to-do list was short, but loaded.

1. Unlock the diner.

2. Clean - extra thoroughly (despite the deep clean you'd done just before closing last night).

3. Turn away any customers who didn’t get the memo that the place was closed for filming.

4. Wait around and try not to throw up all over the freshly polished black-and-white tiles.

Simple enough. In theory.

You moved on autopilot , politely turning away the elderly couple who showed up every morning for pancakes, wiping down every inch of counter space, and dusting under each tacky trinket on display. The cameras wouldn’t catch those details, but cleaning helped keep your spiraling nerves in check.

By 10:24, the first wave of vehicles pulled in — a small entourage, with people spilling out like ants from a kicked nest, all wearing JYP lanyards and name tags.

You stepped outside and propped open the diner's glass door.

“Hi!” you called out, approaching the cluster of crew, trying to keep your voice from trembling.

“Hey there. We’re just gonna set up,” an older man said gruffly, motioning to his team with a few quick gestures. They moved instantly, unloading van after van with clockwork precision.

Lighting rigs.

Makeup chairs.

Mirrors.

Cameras.

Monitors.

And a whole bunch of equipment you couldn’t even name.

As much as you loathed JYP, the company, the chaos, all of it, you had to admit: they were an efficient machine.

“You got a staff room?” the same man asked. “We need somewhere to put the makeup artists.”

Perfect. The one place that had been your safe zone - your only escape from the impending madness- was now being claimed too.

“Yeah... follow me,” you mumbled.

You winced as they flooded in, completely taking over. Your tiny locker, once proudly decorated with stickers a little kid gave you after you made him a cat-shaped waffle, had been shoved aside to make room for coolers packed with water bottles. A wrinkled sign had been taped to the front of the fridge: ARTIST USE ONLY, scrawled across a sheet of printer paper.

Of course it was.

The cooler door slammed shut with a hollow thunk, and someone yelled for a ring light. You barely managed to wedge yourself out of the crowded staff room, murmuring apologies no one really noticed.

Back out front, a sleek black van pulled up to the curb like it was arriving for a royal coronation. Another followed. Then another. Doors swung open and out they came... the artists. Every one of them perfect, polished, radiant in that not-quite-human way that only idols ever managed to be. Even in sweats and bare-faced, they carried a quiet gravity that made the rest of the world tilt slightly around them.

Chan got out of the car first, followed by hyunjin and chnagbin, then Minho, Jisung, Jeongin.

And finally Felix.

You knew it would hurt... Seeing him again. Of course you'd seen him on billboards, on television and on your social medias. He haunted you, for lack of a better word.

He looked ethereal, handsome, his bleach blonde locks tied into a low bun, he had a black face mask on, sunglasses on, as of he wanted to block the world out, he was a true star.

You ducked your head quickly, avoiding eye contact. Not that anyone noticed you, no one ever did anymore.

Sliding your phone from your back pocket, you stepped off to the side, fingers fumbling slightly as you called your manager. You tucked yourself behind a rusted trash can near the edge of the lot, not glamorous, but far enough from the fray.

It rang twice before he picked up.

“Hey,” you said, trying not to sound too on edge. “Just a heads-up: they’re here. Everyone. Crew, equipment, idols... the whole fucking circus.”

A pause. Then: “Already? They weren’t scheduled till eleven.”

“Well,” you sighed, fishing out the crushed pack of cigarettes from your coat, “guess they’re early birds today.”

You lit one with practiced hands, shielding the flame from the breeze, and took a long drag. The smoke hit your lungs like relief. Your manager was saying something, something about waivers or set boundaries or meal delivery times, but his voice blurred under the weight of your thoughts.

The black vans still sat idling by the curb, glossy and smug. You watched as a stylist adjusted one of the idols’ collars, brushing invisible lint from their shoulder while two more followed behind with racks of neatly steamed clothes.

“Are they being nice to you?” your manager asked, his tone shifting a little. “Respectful?”

You hesitated, the cigarette burning gently between your fingers.

“No one’s said a word to me. So... I guess that’s respectful?”

Another pause. “Okay. Text me if anything weird happens. And don’t let them steamroll you.”

You looked over at the sign above the door. Lenny’s Diner — but even the name felt ghostlike today, like it had been temporarily erased and replaced with Set Location: Scene 5

“Sure,” you muttered. “I’ll stand my ground... right after I finish chain-smoking behind the dumpster.”

Your manager laughed, and the sound made something ease a little in your chest.

“You’ll survive,” he said. “You always do.”

The phone call ended with a beep, as you let out a sigh as you did some... Inner reflection.

You used to have potential. You could sing, dance, you stuck to every strict diet, lost weight when you were told to, smiled differently, talked differently. You were the pinnacle of perfection.

Or at least that's what you thought you were, before you were dropped, by not only your company, but your best friend too. Your dreams were crushed with one fell swoop.

You tried to keep your dream alive, you made music, tried to find a record label that would support you. When that ultimately failed you did it yourself, made tiktoks to promote it, downloaded various software apps to make an album cover.

It did okay for a first release, held together with a string and some got glue (symbolically).

But it wasn't sustainable, between working full time at Lenny's diner, trying to save up to move back home and leave Korea, when hiring a studio for a day was $700.

Oh! That was another aspect to the shit show that was your life. You were stuck in Korea, away from family and friends, and you couldn't afford a ticket back home. That was something you wallowed in self pity about for a good while.

"Do my eyes deceive me?" A voice called out. "What are you doing next to a dumpster y/n-ie?"

"Chan?!" Your eyes shot open, and your heart dropped somewhere around your shoes.

There he stood, same warm eyes which used to look at you as you stumbled over Korean words, same lopsided grin, only now framed by expertly tousled hair and the kind of skin that clearly hadn’t seen a cheap diner shift in years. He was dressed in a fitted navy sweater and joggers that probably cost more than your monthly rent, looking every bit like the successful, beloved leader he was.

And yet, he still sounded like the guy who once stayed up with you till 3 a.m. writing songs in a cramped studio closet.

You stubbed the cigarette out on the pavement and tried to collect yourself.

"I could ask you the same thing," you managed, stuffing the half-empty pack back into your pocket. "Didn’t think global idols loitered behind dumpsters for fun."

Chan laughed, that low, familiar chuckle that made something twist in your chest. “What can I say? Old habits die hard. I saw someone sneak back here and wanted to make sure it wasn't a sasaeng- who would've thought it would be an old friend?"

You offered a half-smile, but it didn’t quite reach your eyes.

"Didn't think you'd recognize me," you said, voice soft. "It’s been a while."

He shrugged, stepping closer, hands tucked into his pockets. "It’s not like I forgot you, Y/N. How could I?"

Your throat tightened.

You could feel your heart thudding against your ribs, but you masked it with a dry laugh. “Well, seems like everyone else managed just fine.”

Chan didn’t answer right away. He looked at you, really looked... taking in the worn-out hoodie you’d thrown on this morning, the faded jeans, the exhaustion etched into your features.

“I heard about what happened,” he said gently. “With your label. With... everything.”

You looked away. "Yeah, well. Ancient history."

“Doesn’t mean it didn’t suck,” he murmured.

The silence between you stretched a little too long.

"Why are you here, Chan?" you finally asked. "Not just here-here, but here. Talking to me like we didn’t just go radio silent for two years."

He winced. You hadn't meant to hit him with that much force, but the words had been building for too long to come out politely.

“I wanted to,” he said. “Reach out. But it felt... complicated. Especially with Felix.”

Ah. There it was.

You sucked in a breath through your nose, grounding yourself.

"He's here too, right?"

Chan nodded. "Yeah. He’s in the makeup chair. I don’t think he knew you’d be here.”

You let out a small, bitter laugh. “No one tells Felix anything until it’s too late.”

Another beat of silence passed, the hum of generators and shouting crew members filling in the gaps.

Chan shifted, then pulled something from his back pocket. A familiar object — black and scuffed around the edges. A USB.

"I found this the other day," he said, holding it out. "You gave it to me once. Said it had demo vocals you didn’t want to lose. I forgot I had it... until we were packing for this shoot."

You took it gingerly, staring at it like it might burn you.

“I was gonna throw it away,” he continued. “But I couldn’t. Felt wrong.”

You didn’t answer, just turned the USB over in your hand. Your voice was on this thing — your younger self, hopeful, raw. That version of you felt like a stranger now.

"I listened to one of the tracks," Chan added softly. “The one called ‘Second Best.’”

You blinked.

“You remember that?” you asked, unable to hide your surprise.

“I remember all your songs.” Your breath hitched.

Before you could think of how to respond, another voice called out sharply from the back door of the diner.

"Chan! We need you on set for lighting tests in ten!"

He glanced over his shoulder, then turned back to you.

“I gotta go,” he said. “But... are you staying the whole shoot?”

You shrugged. “I kind of have to. I work here..."

He gave a small smile, that told a different story from the pity in his eyes. “Right. Of course. Look... I know it’s messy. But if you want to talk, really talk, i'd like that.”

You didn’t answer, but you didn’t shut him down either. And maybe that was enough for now.

Chan jogged off, leaving you alone with the USB and the rising churn of nerves in your stomach.

You turned it over again, thumb brushing against the label you’d written in faded Sharpie: “For Safe-Keeping – Y/N.”

As if on cue, the back door creaked open again. You looked up, and your breath caught.

Felix.

No mask, no glasses, just his face, stunning and open and achingly familiar. His eyes found yours almost instantly.

He froze.

You froze.

A thousand memories roared to life all at once. Midnight studio sessions. Street food at 2 a.m. His laugh when he got nervous. His hand in yours.

You swallowed.

He took a slow step forward.

And then another.

"...Y/N?" he said, voice barely above a whisper.

Your heart cracked wide open

--------

A/n this is not proofread ahhh sorry 😖😖

Felix tags: @thatcuntblog @hyunjinsfavwif3 @0325tiny @plus-ultra0 @starrylixq @chasinghxran @iambangchanswife @chaeone1 @peskybirdysya @wilmalovegood @mafiulaputaama @technicallyimportantsweets @beal-o @sweatynightnight @robinnotgood24 @16lotonhermind @pegassus-101 @afararraaaa @jennibahng @jaemdonut @strsforjsb @strwbrryzhra @channiesbighugs

[mooncaps]

The parallels between Catra and Glimmer keep sticking in my mind. They don't quite mirror each other exactly, visually or thematically, but there's a lot of overlap. They're similar in so many ways, but the inverse of each other in certain ways as well. Their natures are so alike that if their circumstances had been swapped, they'd probably just become each other.

So, I guess I’m picking up my shovel and digging into this. I wanna examine the ways they’re alike, the key ways they differ, what shapes each of them, and why their intersecting journeys are significant. There’s a lot to unpack and this is gonna be a long post, but if the subject matter sounds interesting to you, then read on.

Their parallels are most evident in Season 4, but are also woven throughout the show. I'm thinking back to 1x07 when Adora explains to Bow and Glimmer what being raised by Shadow Weaver was like and Glimmer, without missing a beat, says: "Okay, sure, Mom stuff." Completely nonchalant, with a casual shrug, as if nothing sounded out of place. All of these characters are impacted by being embattled in a militaristic conflict, of course, but Catra and Glimmer are both getting particular parental experiences from their mother-figures, the only parent in either of their lives. Notably, they don't have the same experience. Angella's a much better mother to Glimmer than Shadow Weaver is to Catra. Shadow Weaver is abusive, manipulative, power-hungry, and especially cruel to Catra above all others. Even when Angella is harsh, she's constructive and supportive.

But both of these children end up with a strong desire to prove themselves on the battlefield. Both want their mothers to be proud of them, to recognize them as worthy. Catra spends the early part of her life suppressing the urge to prove herself, pretending not to care about it while secretly being deeply upset when she finds herself overshadowed by Adora. Glimmer, on the other hand, openly thirsts for opportunities to be a great commander and earn recognition for her accomplishments. They both have somewhat of an inferiority complex as well. Catra comes to decide she doesn't want to be the sidekick. Glimmer is insecure about being the princess who has to recharge.

In 1x08, Glimmer's jealousy toward Bow and Perfuma is essentially a microcosm of a key dimension of Catra's arc for the show. But Glimmer is much quicker to learn the lessons and grow. Due to her experiences, Catra's walls are much harder to break down. I'll swing back around to that point later.

As Season 1 draws to its close, Glimmer and Catra both gain a little more independence, though they do it in very different ways. Catra does what Glimmer wanted to do at the beginning of Season 1. She presents valuable tech and a valuable ally to her commanding officer. Glimmer gets closer to her mother and they both start to understand each other better. Catra defeats her mother-figure in combat. Glimmer and Catra both gain favor in their respective armies and get the much-desired chance to prove themselves in the Battle of Bright Moon.

In 2x02, Glimmer and Bow take Catra hostage and the ways in which these two characters differ are really highlighted. Glimmer is tempted more than once to be as ruthless with Catra as Catra would be with her, but Bow talks her down when push comes to shove. "We're not them." Catra doesn't have a person in her life who talks her down. Not anymore. Catra sees the reliance on friendship among the Rebellion as a weakness. "It's why you're never going to win."

With the environment she grew up in, Catra's understanding of concepts like friendship and love are primarily in relation to power and manipulation. She's quick to seize upon the closeness between Glimmer and Bow as a way to force Glimmer to use up her magic. Catra's own love for Adora is, in the early days, selfish. She doesn't want to share Adora, whether with friends in the Horde or friends in the Rebellion. And it's why she believes that Adora doesn't feel the same way. If Adora wouldn’t take things to the same selfish extremes, then she must not feel what Catra’s feeling. This is what Catra believes because her experiences have given her this very specific, and flawed, understanding of love.

Glimmer's relationship to love is different. She comes from a more supportive environment and even in the rare instance when she does trend toward selfish love, she's more able to accept and understand the flaws of it.

But focusing on 2x02: Glimmer and Catra push each other's buttons. Each of them instinctively knows how to hurt the other one, though Catra is more willing to inflict that hurt. They’re both paying attention and learning each other’s vulnerabilities. The one moment where Glimmer touches a nerve with Catra is: "How did Adora take years of this? She didn't run away from the Horde. She ran away from you." And Catra immediately pushes back: "You think she's not going to leave you behind too, Sparkles?"

It's somewhat telling that Catra sees Glimmer as having taken her place in Adora's life. Again, similar, but not the same. The relationship between Adora and Glimmer is different to the relationship between Adora and Catra, but Catra, with her limited and warped understanding of love, can't tell the difference anymore than she could when Adora first befriended Lonnie. Catra sees Glimmer as having the same place in Adora's life that Catra used to have. And as much as Catra wants, at this point, to tell herself she's over Adora, she's still angry.

So we’re kind of flipping between parallels and inversions, but a key factor starts to become clear at this point. What Catra and Glimmer hate in each other is what they fear in themselves. Glimmer hates that Catra took her as a hostage, but she's also frustrated that she can't be just as cruel when she has Catra as a hostage. She wants to be cruel, and yet she hates herself for wanting it. Catra hates seeing Glimmer step into the role of Adora's sidekick and she mocks the Rebellion for "the power of friendship" because she hates how vulnerable she felt after opening her heart to Adora. She wants a loving relationship, and yet she hates herself for wanting it. Catra and Glimmer see their own perceived flaws, weaknesses, and shortcomings in each other, which is why there's so much friction between them. It's really an interesting concept that develops further as the show goes on.

The next minor point of interest is 2x04. Glimmer sees the primary conflict as being between herself and Catra. It’s not much, just a little look into how Glimmer is thinking about things.

Seasons 2 and 3 are paired together in terms of themes in a way that other seasons aren’t. At the end of Season 2, or midway through the story threads, Catra loses her mother-figure. At the end of Season 3, Glimmer loses her mother. Once again, the circumstances differ. Angella is truly gone, but Shadow Weaver has simply switched sides. Glimmer’s arc going forward is very much driven by Angella’s absence, whereas Catra’s arc is driven by Shadow Weaver’s presence...as an enemy combatant.

And Shadow Weaver doesn’t just join the Rebellion, she starts working her way into Glimmer’s life. Her opening pitch that gets Glimmer to free her plays on a familial connection - the fact that she taught Glimmer’s father. They go to the Fright Zone together and of course they run into Catra, who discovers Shadow Weaver quite literally taking Glimmer by the hand.

All of this sets the stage for Season 4, where the Catra and Glimmer parallels are at their strongest. The two of them become much more similar to each other in this season. Glimmer is now receiving guidance and familial connection from the very person who shaped Catra into the person she is.

Both Catra and Glimmer effectively take control of their respective armies. Glimmer literally becomes queen and, in the very same episode, Catra seats herself on Hordak’s throne. Glimmer is reluctant to take the throne, Catra is eager to. At the end of the episode Catra says to Hordak, “I think you and I are going to do great things together.” This line echoes what Shadow Weaver said to young Micah and baby Adora. And of course Glimmer is also stepping into her mother’s role.

From there, the two of them find themselves on similar paths. In 4x02 they both have the same idea to recover Mara’s ship. In 4x04 Glimmer wants to think like Catra and asks Shadow Weaver to teach her. Glimmer ends up in a fight with Catra and Catra marvels at Glimmer’s tactical decision to use Adora as a decoy. Where Glimmer was previously unwilling to be like Catra, now she’s determined to do anything for victory. And of course the idea to use Adora as a distraction came from Shadow Weaver and Catra’s recognizing this change in Glimmer’s tactics without quite realizing why it should feel familiar.

Some things happen at different times for these two, but there’s so much overlap. Glimmer starts the season dealing with boring meetings and itching to be out in the field, jealous of her friends. For Catra, she starts the season in the field, but as her plans advance she finds herself stuck in the Fright Zone while Hordak does the field work.

Both of them are focused on success, no matter the cost. They both become so stubbornly obsessed with winning the war that it fractures their friendships. They reject all counsel and push away the people who care for them. In spite of being hurt by losing the trust of their friends, they both double down on trying to win, expecting total victory to be the thing that brings them peace of mind, the thing that makes everything worth the cost.

There’s a push and pull between the two of them throughout the season. Neither can succeed in their chosen path without destroying the other. And yet they can’t seem to destroy each other without losing themselves. Metaphorically, destroying each other would mean destroying their own shortcomings, and both of them want those weaknesses and doubts erased, but neither of them can manage to strike the final blow.

Catra gains the upper hand in the war by having Double Trouble work the cracks in Glimmer’s friendships. Glimmer gains the upper hand by having Double Trouble drive a decisive wedge between Catra and Hordak. Double Trouble’s duplicitous allegiances and feigning of friendships are key developments on both sides of the battlefield and their services are weaponized by both Catra and Glimmer to target each other. Double Trouble essentially acts as a messenger, sent from both of these two characters to tear the other one down. Catra and Glimmer personify to each other what they fear in themselves and Double Trouble gives voice to the doubts of both characters, acting on behalf of each of them in turn.

Double Trouble gets to Glimmer by suggesting that Adora is undermining the queen’s authority. They work from an understanding of Glimmer’s genuine desire to be a great queen. However, and this is a key point, when Double Trouble confronts Catra, the tactic is completely flipped. “You try so hard to play the big bad villain, but your heart’s never been in it, has it?” They work from the understanding that Catra’s apparent desire to lead the Horde to victory is not genuine. As opposed to Glimmer, whose heart has always been in it; her heart’s so in it that she becomes blind to the risks of her plans.

Part of Double Trouble’s speech to Catra can apply to Glimmer’s insecurities as well. “They didn’t believe in you, didn’t trust you, didn’t need you, left you. But did you ever stop to think, maybe they’re not the problem? It’s you. You drive them away, Wildcat.” Obviously it applies to Catra, but it also describes what Glimmer has just been through with Bow and Adora. Glimmer and Catra have so many overlapping fears and this messenger sent by Glimmer to throw Catra off balance ends up making this statement that labels Glimmer’s recent mistakes just as accurately as it does Catra’s.

The key difference between the two of them comes down to their hearts being in it. For all the similarities between Catra and Glimmer in Season 4, this climactic moment emphasizes that, for Catra, a lot of it is an affectation, a costume.

Which brings me to an element of the visual storytelling. I recently read an interesting post about the thematic significance of Catra’s mask. I also made my own post about the change to her hair in Season 4. The visual storytelling has many facets in this show. This post is about parallels though, so what I’m focusing on now is the fact that Catra and Glimmer both change their costumes in Season 4. The first scene of 4x01 features the reveal of Glimmer’s new look and the last scene of 4x01 features the reveal of Catra’s.

One of the first things I noticed about Catra’s outfit is that her new black sleeve and shoulder armor are covering the area that was damaged in the portal reality. At a guess, I’d say she wants to guard against feeling whatever that felt like again. Again though, my focus is on parallels. Let’s have a look at their outfits side by side.

Glimmer’s is essentially an evolution. She’s growing more into herself. She now has both shoulders covered. Hard to say if these shoulder pads are decorative or could serve a protective function. They kind of look metallic. Her legs are newly covered; her neck and chest are newly exposed. There are a few changes to Glimmer’s outfit, but not a lot that’s truly new to her.

For Catra, there are a few new elements in her outfit. The single sleeve, the fingerless gloves, and at the shoulders she seems to have upgraded from fabric to something that looks more like it could be armor. Her legs are more covered than they were in her previous outfit, but there are still small exposed gaps. Her feet were never covered before, but now there’s a partial covering. And there’s also what fandom has dubbed the “boob window,” though this show isn’t one that gives focus to things like cleavage. The new elements for Catra bring her outfit a little bit closer to Glimmer’s.

I’ll be interpreting exposed skin as representing vulnerabilities. Of particular interest to me is the fact that they both wear single sleeves now, one white, one black, and they cover opposite arms. Glimmer has no mask on her face; Catra has no cape covering her back. Glimmer’s boots seem especially enforced at the heel and toe. Catra’s heels and toes are exposed. You know how I’ve been saying that they see their own shortcomings in each other? Now Catra is visibly vulnerable where Glimmer is guarded and vice-versa. The particular asymmetry of the sleeves brings to mind ideas of imbalance, both internally and between them.

Catra’s sleeve looks durable; Glimmer’s sleeve looks decorative. Glimmer’s sleeve leaves a gap of skin exposed below the shoulder pad; Catra’s sleeve covers the full length of her arm. On Glimmer’s unsleeved arm, the glove barely covers her hand; Catra’s glove covers a portion of her forearm. Remember 1x08, that point I said I’d come back to? Glimmer’s quicker to learn the lessons. Catra’s walls are harder to break down. Now it’s visually represented in their outfits.

I’ll reference the visuals as I go on, but let’s get back to thematic analysis. As the Season 4 finale draws to a close, Catra and Glimmer end up together and both have been brought low. Double Trouble has just seen through all of Catra’s walls and read her for absolute filth. Glimmer has to reckon with the fact that her own hubris nearly got everyone she’s been fighting for destroyed. Both have come closer to total victory and closer to total defeat than they’ve ever been. Coming off a string of mistakes and pushing away the people who care about them, they end up together.

Glimmer has the chance to attack a willingly defenseless Catra, but spares her. Moments later, Glimmer is threatened by Horde Prime, but Catra’s intervention saves her. It’s a layered action from Catra, certainly not altruistic, but it saves Glimmer nonetheless. I think something in each of them feels hesitant to see this person, in whom they see their own flaws reflected back at them, destroyed.

And now they’re stuck with each other, quite literally cut off from everyone else. They’re each wrestling with the weight of their own failures and shortcomings, so of course they’re both trapped with the metaphorical representation of everything they never wanted to face in themselves.

They’re together, and yet they’re separated. A barrier stands between them. Catra is at liberty to move about the ship, but there’s nowhere to go and no escaping the watchful gaze of Horde Prime. She’s frustrated by this illusory liberty: “If I’m a prisoner, you might as well make it official.” Glimmer, on the other hand, is in a cell and she wants out, even though there’s nowhere to go. For a brief moment, the barrier is taken down when Catra and Glimmer are invited to dine with Horde Prime. One very effective way to bring people together is to give them a common enemy. They’re only physically together when they’re united in defending themselves against him.

Horde Prime understands the similarities between the two of them and breaks through both of their walls at the same time with the same tactic. “You Etherians are all alike. Such strong connections to one another. It’s what makes you weak.” It’s the unguarded vulnerabilities in Glimmer that poke holes in Catra’s plan of “parsing out information like a bargaining chip.” Though Catra and Glimmer have a common enemy now, they’re not yet coordinated and working with each other.

So we return now to the scene from 5x03 at the top of this post. Even the way it’s framed is significant. The scene could presumably have been presented from the other side, but seeing it from this angle allows me to infer some things about what’s being communicated.

They start out facing each other and we see their sleeved arms. Neither is quite ready to trust the other, so their walls are up. When they stand face-to-face with what they fear in themselves, they put their guards up. They’re both more-or-less equally guarded and equally vulnerable, but the guarded side is what the show’s creators are showing the audience, as well as what Catra and Glimmer are showing to each other in this moment.

The scenery around the two of them shows a stark contrast. Glimmer’s cell is brightly lit with simple architecture. Much of the space around Catra is dark and complicated.

As they open up to each other emotionally, they turn back-to-back and we’re shown their unsleeved arms. When they look away from what they fear in themselves, they let their guards down. Both of them lay a hand on their unsleeved arms, almost as if they’re subconsciously worried that they might need their walls at any moment to defend these vulnerabilities.

Their body language relaxes, though only fractionally in Catra’s case. Glimmer is a little more at ease, but Catra won’t let herself be quite as open and unguarded. Her fingers remain on that unsleeved arm, alert and ready to defend at a moment’s notice.

I’ve talked a bit about walls and defensiveness, but the way these two came to construct their walls is also important. Glimmer and Catra have both experienced hardships in their lives. Both of them grew up with only one close friend. They both felt pressure and a desire to prove themselves and they’ve both endured great tragedy in their young lives. Glimmer has developed more of the emotional tools to work through her pain and begin to heal. Catra is only at the beginning of the healing process and her pain comes from a very different source.

Glimmer spent the majority of her young life believing her father had been killed and then she lost her mother as well. Catra was either given up or orphaned and then taken in by an abusive family. Both experiences were surely traumatic. Catra’s walls are tougher for a reason though. A few reasons. The primary reason is that the source of her fear and pain was also her mother-figure.

Being traumatized by someone who should be on your side is different than other sources of trauma. And because Shadow Weaver is her parent, Catra also bonds with her and wants her approval. This is emotionally confusing and compounds Catra’s issues. Wanting love from Shadow Weaver is one of the reasons Catra hates herself for wanting love at all.

Not only is Catra traumatized by her parent, she also lacks any other parental guidance to help her process her trauma. Glimmer, even after losing her father, still had her mother. It’s after losing her mother that Glimmer really starts to lose balance emotionally. Though Catra had Adora, that kind of comfort is not the same as having the calming influence of a supportive parent to help a child cope with their trauma and assure the child that things will be okay. Further to that are the wedges that Shadow Weaver (and later Light Hope) employed to ensure that Catra and Adora would doubt each other. Then finally, Adora left the Horde and whatever comfort Catra had received from her turned poisonous. This was the thing that threw Catra’s sense of safety into chaos and unraveled any semblance of emotional balance. For much of the show, wanting love from Adora is one of the reasons Catra hates herself for wanting love at all.

This is all a roundabout way of explaining why Catra’s walls are so much thicker than Glimmer’s and why everything around her is dark and complicated. Glimmer has her own walls and coping mechanisms, but they’re constructed differently. Catra is largely driven by defensive panic responses. Glimmer is reactive and even reckless at times, especially after losing Angella, but she’s generally more able to slow down and sort through her feelings. Glimmer’s walls are constructed in such a way that they don’t impede her ability to grow and heal. Glimmer’s walls don’t keep as many things away, but her capacity to let the right people in is the trait that serves her best. The contrast between these two characters speaks volumes.

Season 5 is where Catra and Glimmer begin to learn from each other. They get past the initial reaction of simply being disgusted by seeing what they fear in themselves. They both make some appeals to each other for information and help. The barrier between them comes down again and Catra enters Glimmer’s space.

The audience is shown both sleeved arms. Walls are up. Catra uses both hands and takes Glimmer by the sleeved arm. The cake is in her unsleeved hand; it was an appeal to her vulnerable side. The full appeal from Catra that acknowledges Glimmer’s walls is the one that actually reaches her and gets Catra the information she wanted. It’s an appeal so strong that it can reach Glimmer through her walls, not just some simple ploy to prey on her softer side.

“You can’t tell him.” Glimmer uses both hands and takes Catra by the unsleeved arm. This is an appeal to Catra’s vulnerable side. And it echoes something that has previously frustrated Catra. “It’s always the same with you, Adora. I have to do this. Oh-oh, we have to do that.” This appeal to her softer side isn’t enough.

“Do one good thing in your life.” Glimmer uses both hands and takes Catra by the sleeved arm. The audience is shown both of their unsleeved arms. They’re both vulnerable here. It’s this appeal, which acknowledges Catra’s walls, that reaches her. Catra still reacts in fear, a response pattern that runs deep with her, but the message reaches her through her walls.

After processing some of her emotions, Catra returns, offering Glimmer her unsleeved arm. This is a vulnerable action from Catra.

Glimmer takes Catra’s hand with her sleeved arm.

This is the turning point. They represent each other’s insecurities, each vulnerable where the other defends. Glimmer has the tools to balance out Catra’s vulnerabilities. Glimmer’s sleeved arm meeting Catra’s unsleeved arm is like saying: “I’ve got your back.” If they’re confrontational to each other, or if they ignore each other, they’re both equally defended and equally vulnerable. But if they stand side by side...

...they can compensate for each other’s vulnerabilities. They embrace and understand the insecurities they were afraid of and together they have the tools to present a balanced front that can protect them both. Neither one of them was going to be able to succeed alone, but together they can accomplish more.

Catra knew where the teleporter was and could have escaped on her own, but that would not be success. As Glimmer pointed out, even if Catra runs away it won’t matter when Horde Prime destroys the universe. As Catra pointed out, Adora would still come to rescue Glimmer. It’s their combined knowledge that leads to the solution.

Getting Glimmer out is the key, but Glimmer is unable to do this alone. Catra has the knowledge of the teleporter, Catra has the knowledge as well as the physical combat skills necessary to overpower the clones, and Catra has to be the one to take down the barrier that divides the two of them. Only Catra is in a position to achieve this. In terms of emotional metaphors, Glimmer is ready to let Catra in, but that fact alone isn’t enough. Catra has to be willing as well.

And the plan succeeds. It’s Catra’s most vulnerable action yet and she stands willing to sacrifice herself. Catra sends Glimmer, this metaphorical representation of her own insecurities, to Adora. This action is the very thing that ultimately saves Catra. She’s stuck with Horde Prime and her defenses are all ripped away, but it’s this show of vulnerability that affords Adora and company the opportunity to come in prepared and save this defenseless cat. Glimmer’s willingness to forgive Catra is significant for a lot of reasons, not the least of which is that Catra is the party most responsible for the conditions that led to Angella’s sacrifice, and Glimmer cites Catra sacrificing herself on Horde Prime’s ship as the reason she’s willing to help Adora go back and save Catra.

And once she’s saved, when Catra next gets the liberty to determine her own outfit, as she treads a path of vulnerability and learning to follow her heart...

...the sleeve and fingerless gloves are gone. The costume she put on when she took her seat on Hordak’s throne has fallen away. That’s not who she wants to be anymore. Now she’s ready to start on the path of growing more into herself.

The push and pull contentious relationship between Catra and Glimmer has reached its conclusion, but there are still a few moments of interest. In 5x08, there are several instances where Catra questions what seem to be tactically unsound decisions from the Rebellion and they shrug off the concerns. Near the end of the episode, it’s Glimmer who questions the tactics and Catra who shrugs it off. This shows that they’re both getting more comfortable with each other and also both getting more comfortable with the parts in themselves that make them similar to each other.

In 5x10, when Catra finds herself in trouble, trapped and confronted with rising water, she calls Glimmer, knowing now that Glimmer is someone she can trust when she comes up against the limits of her own vulnerabilities.

In 5x12, Catra goes to Bow and Glimmer, looking for Adora. Glimmer informs Catra that Adora left them behind. Catra says: “Of course she’s gone. That’s what she does, isn’t it?” Glimmer was caught off guard by this, but Catra has recognized this vulnerability in Glimmer since Season 2. “You think she’s not going to leave you behind too, Sparkles.” This time Catra’s not just here criticize; she’s here to help. She warns Bow and Glimmer about Horde Prime’s plans and volunteers herself to take over helping Adora. Glimmer comes up against the limit of her vulnerabilities, but she can tag in Catra to help her now.

In the literal sense, this shows the value of letting other people in. In the metaphorical sense, it shows the value of accepting oneself. Learning from others, finding the common ground, gives us a fuller understanding than we can achieve on our own. No one can do everything alone, but working with people who are skilled where we come up short, guarded where we are vulnerable, and open where we are closed off is what unlocks the potential to accomplish things that would have otherwise been impossible.

I love that message, but I also love the metaphorical message. Glimmer and Catra have repeatedly seen in each other the things they were afraid of in themselves. Hating each other is tantamount to hating themselves and their acceptance of each other is tantamount to accepting themselves, which makes both of them more well-rounded and helps them to move forward.

And those lessons, to me, are among the most significant things about their intersecting journeys. They accept the differences in each other, they recognize the similarities in each other, and they come together to build each other up. It’s at once a journey of learning to accept others and a journey of learning to accept themselves. They learn that greeting their shortcomings with anger is ultimately self-destructive, ignoring these vulnerabilities is perilous, and it’s only through acceptance that they can begin to understand themselves, compensate for their limitations, and better themselves.

They each look into a mirror, see their own insecurities staring back at them, then decide to give that person a hug and say: “I’ve got your back.”

[lexa-lives-in-us]

Yasha finding out about what really is going on behind the scenes with the A.O.I (Angel of Irons) Organization. Break my heart please.

Part 13 of ???

Read 1 - 2 - 3 - 4  - 5 - 6  - 7 - 8 - 9 - 10 - 11 - 12

Dairon doesn’t get the full story until lunch time rolls around.

Caduceus, Veth and Marion whip out a full three course meal in the span of one hour, and Dairon has finally the chance to see the last room of the base.

They limp towards the kitchen, ignoring Beau’s offers to help, and crash on the nearest chair, taking a good look around.

It’s a poorly lit, big room, with stoves, fridge and countertop across the opposite wall from one of the two doors. Dairon sees Veth disappear behind another, and they make a note of exploring it later. In the middle of the room, a long table is already filled with silverware, food and drinks. It can host up to fifteen people, but the Nein plus Marion crowd the side where Dairon is already sitting.

Marion meets their eyes and Dairon averts their gaze, barely suppressing a smile.

The woman takes a seat next to them, and Dairon gets immediately kicked in the shin. When they look up at her, Marion is looking straight ahead with a smirk on her face.

This woman.

***

They devour the food in silence, everyone too absorbed in their own plate, still too exhausted and recovering from last night to dare speaking.

Dairon themselves barely looks up from the delicious meal, too famished to partake in even the smallest of conversations.

Only when every dish is cleared and Caduceus is readying the kettle, Dairon sits back.

“So. Does anyone want to explain?” they ask.

The Nein look around the table, exchanging a series of glances. Jester clears her voice.

“Remember the A of I?”

Dairon nods, but next to them, Marion shakes her head.

“Not going to lie,” Dairon adds then. “I can use a refresher on what you guys did. I only remember it involved Yasha and then, of course, all of you.”

They all nod, the mood suddenly very dark.

Marion reaches for Dairon’s hand from under the table, and Dairon can’t negate that request. Their fingers intertwine.

Above the table, though, Beau is doing the same with Yasha. Their hands join, and Beau looks at her wife and her wife only. Yasha smiles at her and nods. She thanks softly Caduceus as he places a steaming mug in front of her, then takes a deep breath.

As Caduceus gives a cup to everyone, Yasha starts recounting.

Yasha sticks her head around the corner, making sure that nobody is present. It’s not like she’s never been down in the basement, but it’s also not one of her favorite places, and it’s most certainly somewhere she should be without a specific order. She is ready to lie, of course, but she would really rather she didn’t have to.

She is a terrible liar after all.

Obann doesn’t keep her around for her charisma, that is for sure.

Yasha rounds the corner, hand near the leg holster, ready to whip out her weapon at any suspicious movement.

Luckily for her, the hallways seem to be empty.

She can’t hear a single sound coming from either direction, so she keeps walking, and finally uses the key she’s borrowed from one of the others to open the door of the record room.

She sneaks inside, locking the door behind her and turning the light on.

The neon lights come to life with a buzz, illuminating the rows of shelves with a sick green ray.

She roams around them for a few minutes, trying to find a sign that tells her where the files starting with N are.

Finally, she notices a very faint labeling system at the bottom of each row, and then it’s a matter of minutes before she finds a bow with NT-NZ scribbled on the front.

She extracts the box, hesitating for just a moment.

She shouldn’t be here.

She should be upstairs, where Obann and the others are resting, or getting ready and trained for the next mission. Not down here. Not sneaking around like a criminal, looking over files that could-

Files that could either confirm that Beauregard Lionett is indeed the enemy or that could instead destroy every single certainty she’s had of her adult life.

Yasha bites her lower lip.

Because one thing is unfortunately very true.

She doesn’t remember her childhood. At all. She remembers coming to terms with a sort of amnesia, a result of having hit her head too hard during training, or during a mission, but that is pretty much it.

Obann has told her she is being with the Angels of Iron since birth, where she has being trained and educated, loved and cared for. And Yasha has never really questioned anything. She simply does what Obann tells her to do, and although sometimes some mission is not exactly her cup of tea, Obann has always been very clear and reassuring in telling her that they’re doing it for the best of causes.

But Yasha isn’t as dense as her companions believe her to be.

And Beau.

Because there is Beau.

Beautiful, strong, smart Beauregard Lionett.

A CIA Agent.

And Yasha isn’t well versed in American politics or whatever, but she’s pretty sure the CIA is supposed to be the good guys. Or something like that. But Obann hates them. Obann has told her to eliminate any CIA threat on sight.

Yasha doesn’t understand.

Because Beau has talked to her. They’ve talked a lot, actually. And Beau has told her that the Angels of Iron are not, in fact, good. Quite the opposite, really.

And Beau... Beau has kissed her. Beau has looked at her in a way that Yasha only remembers being looked at once, although the details are still blurry.

There’s a woman, a young girl, in her past, that Yasha doesn’t remember. She has a name, but she can’t remember a face. Zuala, the name is. She’s asked Obann about her, but he’s just shrugged and told her to move on.

And Yasha had.

But now she can’t.

Not anymore.

Because Beau has pushed her away from danger, Beau has almost gotten a bullet for her, no longer than a week ago, and Yasha can’t stand the idea of not knowing anymore.

So she places the box on the ground, sits cross legged on the cold concrete floor and finds her file.

Nydoorin, Yasha.

It’s a thick one.

Yasha takes a deep breath, then opens it.

The first page is a birth certificate, in Russian. Born in Novosibirsk, Siberia from [REDACTED] Nydoorin and [REDACTED] Nydoorin. Yasha blinks. She presses a finger on the black rectangular lines, where her parents names have been erased, possibly forever.

Swallowing a lump of tears and bile, Yasha flips the page. It a report, once again with several sections erased, with the Angels of Iron’s letterhead.

Yasha skims through the document, of several pages, noticing how entire sections seem to have been cancelled off.

“The child is above average. The vitals are [REDACTED]. The child appears to be healthy enough for the project. [REDACTED] and [REDACTED] Nydoorin have refused to sign the child off to the organization. [REDACTED] might be necessary.”

“Obtainment of the child is an asset.”

“Approval from [REDACTED] has been received.”

“Proceed with obtainment.”

Yasha remembers witnessing a car crash, one day, a few years back. She remembers how horrible it had been, to see the bodies burn and the people scream without being able to do anything to help them.

It’s exactly how she feels now.

She wants to close everything and run, but she can’t stop reading.

She flips another page, and a set of pictures clipped to a paper appear in front of her.

One is a picture of two adults, a man and a woman, smiling in a hospital room with a newborn baby in their arms. The woman has gentle features, gentle eyes, big hands, large shoulders and long, wavy hair. The man is very tall, with an athletic build, and a nose that Yasha sees in the mirror every day.

The baby is asleep, a small fist curled and closed on her mother’s thumb.

They look peaceful. Happy.

A tear falls on the picture, and Yasha wipes it away slowly, hesitating with her finger on the shape of her father’s face.

She forces herself to move on and look at the other pictures.

A child, with long, dark black hair collected into a braid, stands next to two more girls, one of them with red hair, the other with dark brown ones. Three year old Yasha’s eyes are focused. Her little body is not all that little, compared to the two other children, standing tall above them.

They all seem to be wearing the same uniform.

Other pictures show Yasha’s growth, in that same uniform, and picture her fighting other girls, training in both hand to hand and weapon combat.

The reports the pictures are attached to talk about her.

“Agent Y is skilled.”

“Agent Y mastered the course.”

“Agent Y is fit and ready for combat.”

Yasha keeps going through pictures and files, and every report she reads confirms her suspicions, confirms what Beau has told her about the Angels of Iron.

She starts to see a recurring pattern.

A woman, next to her or behind her or in front of her. A woman with gentle eyes, dark hair and a shit eating grin. Yasha knows immediately who this girl is. As she goes back to the first picture, she recognizes her as one of the two other toddlers in uniform.

“Zuala...” Yasha whispers.

Yasha reads everything once more, looking for signs. And she finds them.

“Agent Y and Agent Z work well together.”

“Agent Z has punched another Agent who was making fun of Agent Y. Investigation required.”

“Agent Y and Agent Z have been found within Agent Y’s quarters, in a compromising situation.”

“Agent Y is a precious asset. Agent Z has been removed from the project.”

Attached to that one file, a single picture.

A black bag, with a dark skinned arm poking out of it. In the background, Yasha sees herself, spine ramrod straight, no emotion on her face.

Yasha stares at the picture, and presses a palm against her mouth, to prevent...

To prevent her to scream, or to puke, or both. She’s not exactly sure.

She stares and stares, and details form back into her memory. Details of Zuala. Of nights together. Of days together. They’re blurred and they’re vague, but they’re memories.

She exhales, trying to swallow a surge of vomit into her throat, and flips the page. It’s a medical report.

She skims through it almost in a haze.

An injection. A cocktail of drugs. An experiment.

Memories being wiped.

A new life. A new Agent. A new Yasha.

More obedient, now that she doesn’t remember. More loyal, now that she has being cleared of distractions.

The last page is a picture in colors.

It’s recent, way too recent. Yasha remembers this one.

It’s herself, her recent self. And next to her, staring with adoring eyes...

“Beauregard...”

Underneath, a few words.

“Possible distraction. Liability. Kill on sight.”

Yasha slams the folder close.

Tears have dried on her face, but it doesn’t matter. She might not know everything, but she knows enough.

It’s time to go.

Silence falls into the kitchen.

The Mighty Nein are all looking down into their mugs, pensive expressions on their faces. They all know the story.

Beauregard’s hand is still on Yasha’s, and her free one is clenched onto a fist. She hasn’t looked away from Yasha’s face for a single moment during the whole story.

Dairon can see the same rage, the same horror they feel, reflected on their kid’s face.

Marion’s hand has been squeezing theirs painfully for the whole duration, and when Dairon turns to look at the woman, they see tears streaming down her perfect face.

“Yasha.” she says, broken voice and broken soul. “My child.”

Yasha closes her eyes for a moment at the word, a single tear escaping her.

She grabs Beau’s hand with both of hers, and takes a deep breath.

A soft voice speaks up from the corner of the table, making both Dairon and Marion turn.

“We found more intel, a few weeks ago.” Jester says, all her usual cheerfulness now gone. “We’ve been trying to dismantle the project for years, now. It’s not easy. They have connections everywhere. Mafia and Ndrangheta in Italy. The Cartel in Mexico. Triad, China. You name it. They’re everywhere.”

Veth takes over.

“So we started setting up traps. All over. We’ve been trying to collect intel about customers, buyers, sellers, anything. We started suspecting on someone who was once seen with one of Marion’s old... Clients.”

Marion is quicker than Dairon to understand.

“The Gentleman.” she says, in a whisper. Her hold on Dairon’s hand loosens just slightly.

Jester nods.

“I talked to him. He didn’t seem to have anything to do with them, this time around. But we didn’t trust that he would just leave it alone, so we had Beau and Yasha at the Hotel, as security. We were going to tell you, Mama, as soon as possible. But then...”

Everyone turns to look at Dairon.

“Then the CIA got wind of a possible meeting of drug lords in Paris, and the Gentleman’s name was made.” Dairon continues, finally piecing everything together. “I was sent in to gather intel and protect the source. Marion, we assumed.”

Everyone around the table nods.

Beau, finally turning away from Yasha, places her palm on the wooden table.

“As you can see, Dairon... We have work to do. You are welcome to stay or to go, once you’re feeling better. But we’re going to do this with or without you.”

The table turns to look at them.

Dairon looks at Marion, and the woman blinks, her beautiful face pale as a ghost.

Dairon turns to look at Beau.

"I’m in.”

[sugarless-suki-writes]

First Lines Meme

Tagged by @nikkxb -- sorry it's taken me so long to get to this, lmao

Rules: List the first lines of your last 20 stories (if you have less than 20, just list them all!)

See if there are any patterns.

Choose your favorite opening lines.

Then tag 10 authors!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I just kinda went to my recents on my google docs, so this is gonna have a mix of stuff, some original stuff too. ye :3 but I'm starting with fics that I currently have posted online. All of them are the first paragraph of the update that's in progress

Favorites have bolded and italicized titles :3

1. Sobriety || KouKag

Kagome had three sessions of therapy so far and she wasn’t fully sure how to feel. She knew it was helping her, but she was left feeling so.... raw and open after every session that she felt like she was just back pedaling and it was hard to cope with. A part of her wanted to just stop altogether and go back to self medicating, but she knew that this was just part of the process. The first couple sessions were going to be hard because there was just so much to unpack, but her therapist was nice and calm and patient with her. She really had to thank Kouga again when she saw him later today.

2. 100 Arms, 100 Years || KouKag

This was the fifth day that an offering had been left in front of Kagome’s door for her. The fifth time she would receive the carcass of a large animal that she wouldn’t accept. The fifth time that Inuyasha found himself in front of her and Kiky��’s shared hut and bringing the carcass to the village for her. His fifth time taking the credit for a hunt he had no part in. He had to admit, this was quickly grating on his nerves. He hated the attention that he was getting from the villagers now. They praised him for shit that he didn’t do. That, and he didn’t want to be praised for anything. It was bad enough that he practically had the Sacred Jewel within his grasp and wasn’t able to use it to become a full-fledged youkai, but now he was being celebrated as a hero by some mere humans? Keh... they’re lucky I don’t tell them what this is all actually about. I bet they wouldn’t be so happy then. He sniffed and scratched at his nose. He talked a big game, but Inuyasha knew deep down that he would never do anything to hurt them. If he did that, that would in turn hurt Kikyō and he couldn’t do that to her.

3. Big God || KouKag

Kagome let out a frustrated huff as she shoved her phone into her pocket. She then plopped down onto the couch, tucking her legs up underneath her and curling into Kouga’s side. “That’s the fourth test we’ve ran, and we just... can’t figure out what the hell that stuff is... It’s so frustrating!” she grumbled.

4. You are the Moon || KouKag

Kagome took care of dinner that night, going out to pick up a few things she would need before returning home and cooking. Her mother tried to talk her out of it, but Kagome insisted, wanting to give her mother a break for the night and do something nice for the family. She missed them, and she wanted to make up for being gone for so long.

5. The Demon of Nabewari Yama || KouKag

Kagome let out a small huff as she looked up at the mountain she was heading towards. She had been traveling for several days, bordering a week now, looking for somewhere to settle. However, all the villages she had come across already had a miko or monk residing there, and if they didn’t, they didn’t want one. To be fair, there weren’t many villages she had come across between her hometown and here, and sure, maybe she should go further out after completing her training, but it was still just a little frustrating.

6. Seasons of Love || ZelGan

Zelda looked herself over in the mirror, and the corners of her lips pulled down into a small frown. Her hair was pulled up into an extravagant updo, several locks braided and pulled into the bun that rested on the back of her head. There were some flowers pinned in as well, all of them white in color. She would have preferred something with a pop of color, so they would stand out against her hair; but she figured that, in the end, everything had to match her dress.

7. Gerudotown || ZelGan -- Title may change for this, idk lmao

Ganondorf let out a grunt as he dismounted from his horse. The beast was large with a jet-black coat and a matching mane. He gave the steed a pat on his neck before handing the reins to a stable boy, holding back a chuckle from the look on the boy’s face. He was certain the child had never seen a beast so big, nor a Gerudo, based on how he was looking up at Ganondorf with wide, disbelieving eyes.

8. Shit, Let's be Pirates || DaveJade

Jade ran down the dirt path leading to a hidden beach. She had just gotten out of class and was eager to go down to the coves. She wanted to find some cool shells and snap a couple pictures for her biology class. She always went above and beyond in that class, but she just had a passion for marine life.

9. Changing Fate || ZelGan

“You can’t possibly be serious about this, father!” Zelda snapped indignantly. Her hands were balled into fists at her sides and her face was contorted in rage. King Rimoll let out a sigh and pinched the bridge of his nose. They had been at this “conversation” for what felt like hours. He didn’t expect it to go this badly. Of course, he didn’t expect it to go well in the first place, but this was beyond what he anticipated.

10. Moon Bonds || KouKag

All Hallow’s Eve. A powerful night for witches and magick users alike. A night that better helped connect them to the spirits of the earth and those who had been lost. It was a night that Kagome looked forward to every year. The surge of magick that tingled under her skin and filled her very being... by the goddess it was an amazing feeling. And this year would be even more delightful and powerful.

11. Princess and the Pirate || Amuto

Growing up, Amu had been told many stories about pirates, everyone on her small island had. But Amu felt as if she had heard more than most. Her mother would tell her tales before bed about the pirates on a ship called the Emerald Line. Despite the name of the ship, its hull and sails were completely black. The only speck of color was the pirate flag it flew, which was emerald green and depicted a cat head with crossbones beneath. It was also known to be the fastest ship to sail the seas.

12. The Black Card || KouKag

Kagome paced around her room in her tiny apartment, struggling with picking out an outfit. It was her first day off in a while and she wanted to look cute, seeing as she wouldn’t be restricted by her, somewhat lenient (semi-strict?), dress code at the bookstore. However, she also wanted to be comfortable, so she was at a bit of an impasse. It wasn’t really as big a deal as she was making it out to be, but she was exhausted and she hoped that dressing nice would throw Sango off her trail. With a huff, she finally settled on a nice sundress she had stuffed in the back of her closet, one she rarely wore and almost forgot she had. It was light blue in color with a floral print.

13. Harvest Moon || KouKag

Kagome stretched as she woke up that morning. She opened her eyes and saw the torn-up ceiling and frowned to herself ever so slightly. She had moved into the country several days ago and had only recently started working on repairs that her home needed. It was a pretty large house, but the rent was extremely cheap. The only downside was she had to pay for the repairs, but in all honesty… she wasn’t too bothered by it. Apparently the house had been abandoned for years. No one was really sure how long... but Kagome could take a guess that it had been at least a decade with how worn down and dirty things were.

14. Memories || Original Fic - No Pairing

Lotus looked around at the scene before her. It would be an easy job, simple. She could do it in her sleep no problem. She scoffed and looked at the man beside her. “Really? You need me for this?” she asked. He turned to look at her, a scowl on his face.

15. Any Way the Wind Blows || ZelGan

Zelda woke up to the sun on her face. She grumbled and grunted, rolling over onto her side on her small mat. She opened her eyes and looked out ahead of her, at the grass and flowers swaying in the breeze. Her stomach gurgled and she placed a hand on it, a grimace on her lips. Food...

16. Found || KouKag

When Kouga had heard that there was a disturbance along one of their borders, he had been prepared for anything. He pulled together a team quickly, not taking all the strongest warriors, making sure to leave some behind to protect his pack. They ran off, ready to fight. Ready for anything. Anything except this.

17. Interlude IV (Showtime) || KouKag

O Signore, per amor del tuo nome, perdonami la mia iniquità... Perciocche ellà e grande Kagome sat there in the street, blood seeping through her clothes and soaking her knees. Tears continued to stream down her cheeks in a never ending flow. Her breath kept catching in the back of her throat as she tried to force down her sobs. Her hands were curled up into fists, pressed against the pavement, soaked in blood and in pain from being clenched so tightly and pressed so firm against the rough asphalt. Regret, despair, and guilt crushed her heart. They squeezed tight, holding onto her and keeping her trapped in the moment. A moment she’d rather drink away and forget, only for her guilty conscious to bring it back in her dreams at night, keeping her away from the blissfulness of sleep.

18. Bubblegum & Nicotine || Original Fic -- Astrid/Loki

Astrid opened the door to the apartment and latched her keys onto her belt loop. She then bent over to pick up the bags of groceries she had set on the ground to unlock the front door. Once she had crossed the threshold into the house, she raised up her right leg and kicked the door closed behind her. With a bit of a grunt, she hoisted the bags up a tad higher and made her way to the kitchen. She set them down on the counter with a thud and took a moment to catch her breath. She may be in good shape, but carrying several pounds of groceries up three flights of stairs because the elevator was out? That would wind anyone.

19. We Are Complicated || Bubbline

Bonnibel Kaugummi entered the school and was quick to drop her things off in her locker so she could head straight to the Student Council room. She grabbed a couple of her books out of the locker and shoved them into her messenger bag. The tan colored bag complimented her uniform, which consisted of a grey sweater, a red ribbon tied into a neat bow, which was neatly tucked underneath the collar of her white button up shirt underneath her sweater, and a red plaid skirt. The red accents to her uniform identified her as a Junior, and they complimented her red-orange hair and rosy complexion.

20. The End of All Things || KouKag

Kagome let out a soft sigh as she curled up in her spot on the bench, bringing her legs up to her chest. She was sitting out on the small deck that overlooked the garden in her backyard and watching the rain. It was fairly cool out thanks to the constant drizzle that had begun early that morning. The sound of it pattering against the ground and roof that extended over the deck filled her with a sense of calm, a calm that she desperately needed right about now. Working as a nurse wore her out. She loved her job, of course, but gods if it didn’t have its trials and tribulations. She had been working almost every day for a solid two weeks now, covering shifts for people on top of her own. Thankfully she had a couple of her shifts taken from her after being at the hospital for a full 24 hours at one point in time. Today just so happened to be her natural day off, and she felt pretty great about it.

[crusherthedoctor]

The Lutrudis Hadeer Characterization Masterpost

A while back, I made a big post about the thought process that went into the design for Lutrudis, as well as her name, species, and choice of weapons. In the midst of doing a bunch of other stuff (like the Eggman Sweet or Shite review, which is definitely still coming guys I swear, please don't leave me D':), I recently figured I could do the same for the character's... well, character, and provide some further insight into how her personality was shaped together. Cause why not, right?

Obviously, we won't be covering literally every single personality trait that Trudy has, like her hobbies and whatnot. If we went over all of that, we'd be so far into the future that Tumblr's search system might actually start working again. No, we'll just be keeping it to the central ingredients that make up the overall package.

1. A cool head? In my Sonic OC?

The recurring cast in the Sonic universe is filled with fiery, hot-blooded sorts in one way or another. Sonic might as well be the love child of Mentos and Diet Coke with how full of energy he is, Knuckles and Amy are both prone to letting their temper do the talking, Eggman... is Eggman, and the list goes on. And while there are a number of characters who are more low-key or even outright introverted by comparison, they still tend to exhibit a trait or two that makes them more in-line with the rest of the crowd, be it youthful excitement (Tails, Cream), a fiery temper (Blaze), or the odd bit of cockiness (Shadow).

So what better way to help make Trudy stand out... than by not really having anything like that at all? Contrary to most of the hot-blooded cast, it takes a lot to truly enrage her, and even then, you'll be lucky to get anything past tranquil fury. She's not particularly hammy either - flowery with her language at times, certainly, but not hammy - nor is she a cocky type, even against the weakest or most ridiculous of opponents, and although she does grow as a person over the course of the story she's involved in, all of this remains fairly consistent.

That's not to say that Trudy is not a passionate person. Far from it, in fact. She has a lot of passion. She just shows it in a different way than the average Sonic character.

2. Lutrudis? More like Unsureofdis.

Uncertain characters are also somewhat rare in Sonic's recurring cast (at least in the game universe), and just like with the previous point, even when they're there, they'll usually have something to counter it. Blaze may have been a bit insecure before meeting and befriending Sonic and Co, but as mentioned, she’s got a fierce temper, and even when she started off on her own, she felt that only she could take care of the threat of Eggman and Inferior Eggman Nega. Likewise, while Silver may have doubted himself about Leslie the Crack Dealer’s Iblis Trigger ruse cruise, he still got cocky when he had Sonic on the ropes, and he could be quite full of himself in the Rivals duology as well.

The point being, they still tend to show some semblance of the same “yep, I'm the one for the job, no questions asked” confidence and swagger that nearly everyone else has, no matter the flavor. Trudy, suffice to say, does not have this mentality. Trudy accepting Sonic and Co's help in dealing with sinister affairs in Viridonia without any haughty protest on her part isn't just because she knows they can handle it, or because they're Sonic Heroes and they'll show 'em the real superpower of teamwork... it's also because she's genuinely not sure if she would be able to take care of the matter on her own.

When she saved Cream from the wrath of the Wraith for example, she wasn't thinking “This looks like a job for Miss Hadeer!”

She was thinking “This could very well get me killed, but I have to help the poor bunny somehow...”

In other words, Trudy doesn't consider herself to be some sort of destined protector who has to do this herself. She constantly second guesses herself, and frequently believes her friends are more qualified and competent than she is. Her only reason for doing her best and helping out regardless is simply because she wants to.

3. A light at the end of the tunnel.

For the sake of tact, it's not shoved in your face relentlessly, but reading between the lines, it can be easy to get a sense of melancholy from Trudy. Particularly due to past experiences, she does indeed have an element of depression within her, and this can occasionally show in her body language and facial expressions, even if she's currently feeling positive emotions.

And yet, notice how she continues being a friendly pony. Notice how regardless of her experiences, and her thoughts on said experiences, her actual behaviour is (mostly) free of bitterness or cynicism, and that she doesn't hide the joy that her new friends make her feel. She's not outright ignoring her experiences or pretending they don’t affect her, because they clearly have affected her, and she's never ignored her scars (metaphorically and literally, the latter being a permanent side-effect of her condition), but she knows better than to let it consume her, so she tries her best to look at the bright side of life even during the darkest days.

It's Sonic's opinion that Trudy's inner spirit is a lot stronger than she thinks, with or without his help. Her refusal to give into misery and lash out at the world foreshadows that he's not unjustified in that belief. That, and it ties into the franchise’s usual taste for optimism and idealism against the odds.

4. Hadeer? More like Hadork.

So, everything thus far helps set Trudy up as a mellow, down-to-earth sort of personality. So far, so good. However, it's still the Sonic the Hedgehog universe we're talking about, filled with many colorful characters of all shapes, sizes, and eccentricities. When a franchise has a larger than life cast in a larger than life world, the characters who are meant to be grounded often risk coming off as boring and could end up easily overshadowed, because the creators or writers often neglect to give them any quirks of their own, usually out of fear that it'll disgrace the character's gracefulness. In fact, I personally feel this was a common problem with Sally, in both SatAM and Archie (mostly pre-reboot admittedly).

IMO, these writers are just being plain old silly. Just because a character is quirky doesn't mean they forfeit all their dignity altogether. Like a lot of things in life, you just have to balance it out, and that's what I did (or tried to do...) with the green equine.

So yes, Trudy is elegant, but she's also a really goofy dancer. Yes, she's gentle and motherly, but she also goes back and forth between being a heavy sleeper and being an insomniac. Yes, she serves as a warmhearted auntie figure for Cream (and a big sister figure for Amy), but she also spends a quarter of her time looking like a ninja with the way her bandana covers her face (whether it be due to cold weather, strong scents triggering her sensitive nose, or doing it in the presence of villains as a mildly theatrical way of visually conveying her disdain for them).

And of course, in the right situation, she can be just as much of a dork as the titular blue hedgehog is.

Which leads me to my next point...

5. “You might know everything I'm going to do...”

Trudy was created with the intention of having a character who is actually like Sonic himself in a lot of ways, but it's not apparent initially.

This sort of yin-yang contrasting routine has been done before a few times in the series, with Knuckles, Shadow and Blaze being the most obvious examples. But with them, their similarities are easier to spot from a distance. Knuckles is more earth than wind, but you can tell he's as stubborn as Sonic is. Shadow's methods and outlook differ, but you can tell he's still a mirror of Sonic (cause you know, he looks like him). Blaze is more distant, but you can tell how she can easily be just as worked up and angered as Sonic.

With Trudy however, if you take her at face value, you would think she's the exact opposite of Sonic. She's an introvert, he's an extrovert. She's got a calm temperament, he can get impatient even at the best of times. She's quite fancy, he's more rough and tumble. She takes things slowly, he leaps ahead without a care in the world... You would think that, outside of them both fighting for good, they would have nothing in common, and that their dynamic would be more akin to Sonic's relationship with Sally, which although they were friends, their relationship could often be somewhat rocky due to their differences in... basically every area and opinion imaginable.

But then you get to know Trudy, and the unfolding of the adventure reveals the rest of what she has to offer. The aforementioned soldiering on in spite of any depressed moments is in itself a small hint that Trudy shares Sonic's philosophy of never giving up. She believes that most people are good at their core, and while she won't excuse especially evil people or actions and will punish them appropriately (albeit with regret that it had to come to that), she's willing to give a chance to those who are willing to take it, just like with the Blue Blur. Not only does she NOT find Sonic's jokes and hijinks annoying, she actually has a similar sense of humor herself. And while reasonable people generally tend to loathe injustice and oppression, Trudy shares Sonic's uniquely intense contempt for it, and believes in one's own personal freedom just as much as the hedgehog does, let alone freedom in general.

In short, Trudy is what you get when you take Sonic's deeper qualities and general outlook on life, and apply them to a more introverted and taciturn personality. The exact same beliefs, but from a different perspective, so to speak.

6. A different kind of intelligence.

Tails and Eggman are the resident kings of scientific prowess in Sonic's world, and it goes without saying that I wouldn't want to do them a disservice by having Trudy one-up them in that department. But that doesn't mean your character can’t be talented in other areas, right? Contrary to what all those Mary Sue tests dictate, your character can in fact have a high IQ without intruding on an official character’s territory.

Therefore, Trudy is pretty good at innovation and craftsmanship in her own right, but whereas Tails and Eggman do it through technology, her field of expertise is more to do with arts and crafts, and to a lesser extent geology. For example, both her bow and her whip were crafted by the lady herself, using nothing but her decorative knowledge and flair.

Outside of that, she tends to know a fair bit about a lot of things in the world, largely attributed to her photographic memory, meaning she's bound to have a few answers no matter the subject of discussion. Granted, she's unlikely to be the absolute number one expert on any of those things, but she's at least a useful jack of all trades in that regard.

7. Feeling a little horse.

I very much approve and flat out adore the idea of Sonic characters having characteristics that remind the audience of what species they're supposed to be, so I made sure that Trudy had a wide selection of little mannerisms that would reveal her for the little horsie that she is. These include, but aren't limited to...

- When she’s fascinated or concerned by something, she’ll lean a little forward with her hands close to her chest, which subtly mimics the act of prancing.

- When she wakes up, she briefly stretches her arms and legs (albeit not too recklessly so as to risk straining her sensitive limbs).

- Her tail has a number of quirks. If she's happy, it might slowly swish to and fro. If she's REALLY happy, it might flick...

- And if she doesn't approve of someone or something, it might stiffen and raise a little bit, as if to helpfully inform the bad guys where they can kiss, if ya know what I'm saying.

- When she's being affectionate with her friends, she might give them the ol' nuzzle.

- When she's in a playful mood, there might be a little skip in her walk, the anthro equivalent of trotting.

- When she's annoyed, she might humorously let out a snort that sounds identical to a real life horse snort. And while she certainly doesn't neigh in the traditional sense, when she finds something hilarious or Sonic's making her laugh with his antics, her laughter can't help but take on a neigh-like touch to it. (The latter was actually a headcanon suggested by @darklightheart​, and I immediately agreed with it because it's cute and funny in equal measures.)

Naturally, she gets all shy and embarrassed when the neigh-laugh comes out, thinking it sounds silly. At least Sonic finds it endearing.

Note that I'm well aware that some of this differs from how real life horses react to certain things. (Eg: tail swishing tends to happen when a horse is agitated rather than happy.) But I freely admit that it's more for the sake of giving the character that extra bit of soul than it is for utmost accuracy. That's the way it goes with fiction sometimes. :P

Interestingly, Trudy tends to get Sonic indulging in a funny hedgehog characteristic of his own. That being, he might curl into a ball if Trudy's being particularly... ~complimentary~ towards him.

And there we are! These are the core elements that make up Trudy’s characterization. If you ever wanted a general list of what makes her tick, then hopefully this post will help in scratching that itch. And if it doesn’t, then hopefully it still proves that more thought was put into her than Scourge. :]

[kadavernagh]

Ties That Bind || Solo

The 70 mason jars in the trunk clattered and clanged against each other the whole ride up to Millinocket. Every time Regan pulled to a stop and heard a couple of them roll or fall over, the ridiculousness of what she was doing sank in all over again.

Still, facing the bottles and her inevitable training failures was almost easier than facing the the familiar lakehouse in front of her. Even parking the car stirred up memories of the family minivan in that exact spot, Kavanagh siblings spilling out of the car, antsy to dive straight into the lake after a long drive. It had been a couple of years since she’d been here, but new chasms had formed between her and her brothers in that time, and childhood memories never felt so heavy. 

By the side of the door sat a few bones. A mix of turtle and chipmunk, by the look of them. The flat turtle skull seemed to peer up at her, and she knew what it meant. Reilly had been here recently. They always left things for each other. Had he left them before or after they’d last talked? She went to pick up the bones, but hesitated. They made her skin pulse, and she wanted to run them through her fingers, but she didn’t feel deserving of them. She gave them wide berth instead as she headed for the door. 

Regan slipped the key into the door’s lock. For a moment, she convinced herself that Reilly or Al changed the lock after she’d failed to attend dad’s funeral. It would send a message: she was no longer part of the family. Her mom no doubt felt that way -- even after her parents had separated, they continued to care for each other in a sense. Reilly and Al had always been closer to dad than she had been. Regan was sure her actions -- or lack of presence -- was unforgivable in their eyes. Really, how could she even set foot here, expecting that the key would still function? But the lock clicked, and the door cried open on old hinges. She swallowed back what was either a sob or a scream, it was hard to be sure, and stepped cautiously inside.

Someone had been here recently. Had it been Reilly, when he’d left those bones? Minimal dust coated the floor, and a quick scan of the front hall only turned up a couple of spiderwebs -- unavoidable out in the woods. 

There, on the middle of the kitchen table, was an envelope. She picked it up. Her name was scrawled across the back in Reilly’s handwriting. Seeing that, Regan quickly dropped it back on the table like it had burned her. She wasn’t sure she wanted to read its contents. 

Regan took quick inventory of the kitchen -- plenty of canned food with distant expiration dates -- and the bedrooms, confirming that they were reasonably neat with clean sheets. She’d always liked coming here, but as she went from room to room, loneliness seeped in. She liked coming here because it was with Al or Reilly or sometimes both of them. Because her fondest and most vivid memories of Liam were tied to this place. Because her family had spent summers here together, all six of them, before death started trailing her. Regan paused outside of the bedroom her parents occupied here, and turned away with a shiver. She’d keep that door closed. She had to wonder if it had been a mistake to drive up here a couple of days before Kaden and Nadia.

But then, she’d come here to do more than just tidy up. With a thick swallow, Regan turned her attention back to the bottles and jars filling the trunk of her car. She left the lakehouse, trying to brush those ghosts away, and unloaded everything.

---

Step 1: Set up nine mason jars in three rows. Space them roughly ten feet apart on all sides.

The expansive clearing by the lake looked almost the same as it had 15 years ago. She scarcely visited here even during her sojourns to the lakehouse, and it showed. Poison ivy and weeds blanketed the ground in certain places, and the apple tree Reilly had planted grew taller and thicker, but it was striking how little things had changed. Regan nearly stepped on soccer ball that Al or Reilly, or, hell, even Liam abandoned. It was covered in dirt, its white patches now a murky brown, but it was still roughly ball-shaped and inflated. She wanted to pick it up and move it into the house, but who knew how many years it’d been sitting out here, accumulating all sorts of nasty things on it? No thank you. She nudged it out of the way with her shoe and set one of the mason jars down where it had been. Then she paced away from it and started counting out intervals of about ten feet.

Step 2: Stand approximately twenty feet away from the jar in the front center.

When all of the jars were spaced perfectly apart, Regan stood back and admired her work. She almost didn’t want to break them. Although, if everything went according to plan, not all of the jars would be casualties.

Nothing ever went according to plan. This had never worked in front of Deirdre, and Regan doubted it was just nerves.

Step 3: Attempt to direct the scream at a single jar.

Regan was in position. She dug the heels of her feet into the ground, cleared her throat. Cracked her knuckles. Cleared her throat again. Stretched. Did she really have to do this? How bad was it, really, to belt out the occasional mirror-shattering, ceramic-tile-cracking scream that was completely beyond her control?

But her thoughts soured as she thought of the squirrel -- and of her brothers. Kaden. Nadia. That same, vivid image she’d had while training with Deirdre burned in her mind. The blood and the viscera of loved ones exploding over everything. There was something else, too -- something that seemed to curl around her limbs and chest like ivy, something almost pressing her into action. The puppet strings of a promise made, like Lydia had described.

She stared down at the mason jar. It was one of the ones that Nessa had given her– she could tell by the beveling on it. What would Kaden say, if he were here? And he would be here, if she’d allowed it. He offered, but the further away he stayed while she did this, the better.

She couldn’t face her brothers or the stained thoughts of her father, she feared she might kill Kaden or another loved one by mistake, she didn’t understand her saprophytic tendencies, and every time she hallucinated at work, her worries about losing her job become all-consuming. That was not being well-adjusted. That was not having control of her life. 

Even her body was urging her to just go ahead and scream. She could feel it building in the back of her throat like a hot ball of bile. It was locked behind her teeth, but just barely, with her willpower to contain it shrinking rapidly. Every cell inside of her wanted that release– and that almost orgasmic stillness that came afterwards.

It’s not too late to swallow it back.

Yes, it is, the ivy replied, constricting around her lungs, snaking its way through her capillaries.

Regan let it escape. The teeth-jarring, bone-piercing screech sent birds shooting into the sky and deer running in the opposite direction. She tried to focus on that one jar and limit the destruction, but to no avail– she could hear the chorus of exploding glass underneath the scream. It took on a life of its own, only stopping when it burned itself out like a fire without oxygen. It was as if some part of her had been excised. Released. Set free and exposed.

Step 4: If only the target jar broke, move the jars closer together and repeat steps 1-3. If multiple jars broke, repeat steps 1-3.

She caught her breath, hands and jaw trembling, as she surveyed the damage. Her heart pounded slowly with foolish hope.

Every jar. Shattered. How could she think otherwise?

Regan began the trek back to her car. There were 61 more mason jars waiting for her.

[tightaroundthewebshooter]

La Petit Mort pt.1

pt.1 | pt.2 | pt.3 | pt.4

Harley Keener/Peter Parker 

CW: non-graphic murder, minor character deaths, non-graphic smut

read on ao3

_________

The room was silent, save for a steady drip and two heavy breaths. 

The girl in the chair was slumped backward, arms hanging by her side and head back as if she was asleep.

A whisper breaks their silence.

"We should go."

A nod. Two people shuffling to get up. Dripping slowing then stopping. A door closing, a car driving away. 

Peter loved the open road. The wind blowing through his hair as they drove, the sense of freedom, the scenery, it made him feel like he could breathe.

He was sitting in the passenger seat, feet up on the dashboard, head resting against the car door next to the open window. Harley was singing along to some trashy country song on the radio while he was driving and Peter laughed at his weird faces.

He was happy.

Road tripping the country with someone he loved, no obligations, no restrictions, just fun and long summer evenings.

They pulled up to a roadside motel as the sun started to set.

Harley keeps singing as he parks the car and they get out, laughs as Peter dances around him. They’re shaking with laughter as they enter the motel, and the lady at the front desk beams at them.

Harley did the talking as Peter leaned against him, head on his shoulder, glancing around.

They finish checking in and paying, getting the keys to the farthest cabin from the road. They dumped their bags there and went over to dinner, racing each other to the building and basking in the last few rays of summer sunlight.

The night was cold and smelled of pine and sand. Peter held Harley close to him and admires the boy as he slept. Even after all this time he still took his breath away.

The shape of his lips, breathing softly against Peter’s chest, his long light eyelashes, fanning out over his cheeks, his heartbeat against Peter's, his breath aligned with his.

It made him feel things he knew he shouldn't. Something more than love. Something they would both have to deal with...

The boy in the bar was a loudmouth and Peter wanted him bad.

He was bragging about how he could get anyone here and Peter was fascinated with his lips and his hands but most of all his eyes. They were like honey and they matched his golden skin perfectly.

"Harley," he whispered, just loud enough for Harley to hear over the music and the people talking.

"Him." he said as he pointed at the honey boy.

Harley's eyes lit up. He smiled and nodded, Peter smiled in return and kissed him quickly before walking off.

This was Harley's favorite part. Or well, one of his favorite parts. Watching Peter hunt.

Because he did it so beautifully, all soft eyes and coy smiles, pretty words and prettier moves. The boy was his in no time.

What came next was definitely Harley's favorite part. The kill.

The boy was beautiful. So, so beautiful. Everything about him was perfect.

The way his hair stuck to his sweaty forehead, the way he panted, the way he screamed. It was all so beautiful.

"Harley, come look at this." Peter said, voice full of wonder.

Harley stopped what he was doing and bent down to Peter, heads next to each other so he saw exactly what he meant.

"Look" he repeated before gently placing his hand on golden abs.

The boy shivered at the touch.

The movement was soft, loving, metal over skin.

Crimson was Harley's favorite color and this boy had such a beautiful shade of it. The scent of iron filled the air and Harley sucked in a breath.

Peter's eyes were wide with awe and when Harley painted his lips in the boy's crimson he couldn't help but kiss him.

It was warm and tangy and bitter and they loved it with every fiber of their being.

Honey boy was dying and they were in love with his death.

La petit mort as the French called it.

When they laid the boy down on their bed, chest open and eyes empty after all the bliss they couldn't help but marvel at their work

They whispered sweet nothings to him and each other as they laid down left and right of the boy.

He didn't say anything back but that was okay, he didn't have to. In fact, they preferred it if he didn't.

The morning was cold and rainy.

Peter and Harley took a shower together before they left for the open road again.

The boy was still in their bed but they didn't care anymore.

They were gone within the hour and miles away by sunrise.

They drove for days, weeks even. Rarely stopping anywhere besides small motels. Honey boy had been talking.

But the further they went away from him the less he mattered and after a while they forgot all about him. Or at least they pretended to.

By the time they reached Washington Peter was all cut up and Harley felt vaguely broken. But they were so in love.

They ran through the rainy streets of Seattle and made love in the damp dark forests. And after weeks, maybe even months, the longest they had ever gone without, they found another love.

The rain had been warm on their skin as they touched each other in the bright meadow. Peter looked breathtaking in the light and Harley sat up to kiss the blue and purple roses blooming on his stomach as Peter moved to the rhythm of the rain.

Afterwards, when they laid down in the grass, that was when they heard him. A sturdy frame, stumbling through the trees at the edge of the clearing, freezing at the sight of them. Icy blue eyes from underneath copper hair.

He reminded them so much of...

He seemed like a faery almost, with those leaves tangled in his long hair and those eyes... Like the purest forest stream.

Peter got up gracefully and Harley followed him, a hand on his shoulder as they walked towards the faery boy like deer, all elegance and innocence.

They took his hands and pulled him back with them towards the light.

So much like...

The boy seemed almost as enchanted by them as they were with him and mirrored their every movement.

He lost his jacket as Harley kissed him, and his shirt when Peter reached around from behind him and guided his lips from Harley's to his own. He lost his trousers when Harley kissed his chest and Peter kissed his neck, he lost his breath inside Peter and Harley inside him.

He lost his life with love and two knives in his heart.

They made him flower crowns and daisy chains. They danced with him and painted themselves in his crimson, only for their drawings to be washed away by the rain moments later.

They laid on the forest floor with him, naked as the day they were born, and told him stories and faery tales.

Magic for their faery boy.

But when the rain stopped so did their love.

Faery boy was lying on the ground, flowers in his hair and drawings on his skin, the last few raindrops falling from the leaves high above into his wide-open eyes and running down his cheeks like silver tears. He looked like a fallen statue of a civilization thought to be long lost but in fact very much alive in the darkest corners of the woods.

Peter had taken his shirt and Harley had taken his jacket.

The boy didn't mind and Peter was in love with the painting of red and green and silver they had made on it. Harley took the jacket because it smelled like moss and rain and iron and faery magic.

They left the boy to be breathed by the forest and returned to their car.

When they hit the road Harley was humming a song in and Peter started humming along when he recognized it.

They got louder with every mile and by the end of the road they were screaming the song, laughing and crying at the same time.

Because this was their song. And it was faery boy's song And it had been her song.

[feferipeixes]

Innocence Is Not Knowing That You’re Innocent (4/5)

Belle knows her brother pretty well. He likes comic books, he cheats at board games, and he wants more than anything to be human again. So, when he wakes up one morning with no memory of the fact that he’s a demon, she figures there’s no reason to remind him just yet. He deserves some time to just enjoy being Dipper, and not have to be Alcor.

Unfortunately, she can’t hide Dipper from the demon forever.

Chapter 4: Night of the Living Dead (link to chapter 1) (2) (3)

Shout out to @toothpastecanyon​ for being a super helpful beta reader!

(See the most updated version on AO3!)

===

“Come on out, you look great!”

Dipper groaned. “This is humiliating! How again did you get me to agree to this?”

“You’re getting my ice cream for a week,” Belle answered gleefully. Was it a bribe? Sure was, but making deals with a demon so often had taught her that a good bribe can solve almost anything. It had also taught her how to craft a loophole, and since Dipper didn’t have his demon powers right now, he hadn’t noticed that if their dad bought popsicles for dessert that week instead of ice cream, she wouldn’t have to share any of it. “Now come out!”

Dipper made a noise that was clearly intended to convey just how displeased he was with the entire situation, but mostly sounded to Belle like an adorable, yowling cat. He shuffled out of the closet looking sullen. “Happy?”

“Yes!” Belle squealed and jumped around, the bangles on her arms jangling loudly as she did so. “That costume looks really good on you!”

He turned around, and flinched when he caught sight of himself in the mirror. He was wearing a long, sky blue poncho with pictures of birds flying across. He had grass-green pants and shoes, and a plush headdress that looked like the sun. It covered most of his head, leaving only a very nonplussed Dipper face sticking out. “I look ridiculous.”

Belle clapped giddily. “Nonsense, you look great, and it works because we match!” Her poncho was black, and studded with white little LED lights that looked like twinkling stars. Her long skirt and shoes were also black, and her headdress was shaped like a crescent moon. “It’s great, because we’re so different, we’re like... day and night!”

“Why do you get to be night?” he humphed. “At least you’ll blend in when it’s dark out.”

“I get to be night because I’m dark and brooding, and you’re sunny and delightful!”

“Belle, that’s the opposite of -”

“Well, you’ll be bright and sunny when we go out! You’ll have to be -- it’s Halloween!”

Dipper facepalmed. “Aren’t we a bit old to go trick-or-treating?”

“Yeah, we are. And it saddens me greatly! But we won’t be going trick-or-treating. We’re going to be going…” (she imitated doing a drumroll) “to a haunted house!”

He gaped at her. “What?”

“Onika told me there’s this old apartment building her family owns that no one lives in anymore because it’s full of ghosts and stuff! That’ll be fun, right? Ghost hunting, looking for mysteries, and all that?”

“That does sound fun…” He seemed to think it over for a bit, and then nodded. “Alright, sure. I’m in. But I’m not going outside in this outfit unless you make it two weeks of ice cream.”

“Deal!” She raised her hand for a high five, but Dipper had already turned around and was walking out of the room.

Oh yeah. This was just normal bribery -- no demon magic involved.

---

Belle was pretty pleased with her plan. A haunted house was the perfect thing for Dipper on Halloween. His powers were locked up, so he wouldn’t get summoned away in the middle of their fun. He always loved mysteries and exploring when they were younger, and since he didn’t know he was a demon, he could fear for his life just like everyone else! Yes, she thought, this was the perfect thing for him to get to enjoy while his Alcor memories were gone.

As for her? She honestly wished she could be going trick-or-treating. It wasn’t really true that they were too old, because she knew Alistair was taking his younger brother trick-or-treating, and that’s still technically getting to go trick-or-treating because adults usually give out sympathy candy to the teenagers who have to chaperone little sugared-up kids around town at night! But she knew Dipper wouldn’t enjoy it correctly -- sure, he had a sweet tooth like no other ancient demon she’d ever heard of, but scaring strangers into giving him candy was something he didn’t need to be human to do.

Besides, he was starting to figure things out. She was going to have to tell him soon enough. Might as well make sure he had some extra special fun before she does.

“Are we almost there?” he asked.

“Yeah, it’s just at the top of this hill.” She stuck her tongue out. “What, is Mr. Sunshine getting scared out here in the dark?”

“No!” he replied indignantly. “I’m just excited. Why again does Onika’s family own a haunted apartment block?”

“Oh! It’s a good story!” She pulled out her phone, turned on the flashlight, and held it under her chin. “Legends say that Onika’s family promised a group of construction workers that if they built a building for them, they’d get invited to fancy apartment dinner parties all the time. But when the building was finished and Onika’s family sent out the first invitations, the workers were left out! Then, a big piano hanging from a girder 15 stories up suddenly fell down and squished them! They swore to haunt the apartments and get their revenge on rich people forever!”

Dipper scoffed. “Come on, you just stole that from the legend of the haunted Northwest Mansion in Gravity Falls.”

“Who knows? It could be true!”

They came over the crest of the hill, and there it was: an old apartment building.

“...is this it?” Dipper asked, nonplussed. “Seems a little underwhelming.”

“Yeah! Come on, Onika gave me the keys.” She skipped up to the front door, and pulled out a jangly keyring. “I think some of these are to public pools, country clubs, celebrity houses… aha! Creepy apartment block key!” She unlocked the door, and the two of them were hit with a wave of stale air. Belle sniffed in enthusiastically, and then coughed. “You smell that, Brolock Holmes? That’s the smell of mystery!”

“More like the smell of mildew,” he responded, also coughing. Still, he edged past Belle and into the building. Smiling, she skipped after him.

“I think I found a light switch,” he said. There was a click, and the room lit up. The hallway looked positively from another era -- carpeted floors, wooden doors, a chandelier with incandescent light bulbs in it. There was a layer of dust over just about everything.

“Hallway seems pretty not-haunted,” he remarked after a minute. “You wanna take a look in some of these rooms?”

“Sure, but there’s no chance on earth that we’re splitting up! You’ve seen horror movies!”

“Yeah, yeah, I know.” He went over to the nearest door, and activated the opening mechanism. It was unlocked, and swung open with a loud creak. “Belle, can I have your flashlight?”

She hugged her phone to her chest. “Use your own, goober!”

“Sheesh, fine.” He pulled out his phone, turned on the flashlight, and shined it into the room. Not much of note immediately jumped out at them -- a dusty sofa, dusty coffee table, dusty chairs, dusty TV. He signaled for Belle to follow him, and they tiptoed together into the room. Once inside, they both shined their lights around in a wider arc, trying to get a better look at the room.

“Huh,” Dipper said. “Kind of a letdo-”

There was a loud noise, and the door to the apartment slammed shut. The twins both yelped and jumped about a foot into the air.

“Dipper? What’s going on?” Belle asked, voice shaking.

“Dunno, but the door’s not opening. Lights aren’t turning on either. Let’s, uh… let’s take a look around.”

“Alright…”

He set off toward an old bookshelf, looking more excited than anything else. Belle settled for poking at the kitchen table. It had some weird old cables clamped to the underside of it, but nothing else so strange as to call haunted. Which was just as well -- at this point, she wasn’t sure whether she really wanted the apartment to be haunted or not.

And then she felt a tap on her shoulder, which she hoped against all hope was just Dipper pranking her, but she knew her brother was awful at pranks, and furthermore she could see out of the corner of her eye that he was on the other side of the room, looking at books on a shelf. She gulped, resigned herself to whatever fate would befall her, and turned around.

There was nothing there. She didn’t know whether that made things better or worse.

“You were a fool to come here.”

Belle’s heart sank. “Aren’t you having fun, bro-bro?”

He looked up from the dusty tome he was nose-deep in. “It’s alright. Kind of eerie, but I was hoping to see a ghost.”

“Oh. Why did you say I was a fool to come here, then?”

“What are you talking about?” He dropped the book and rushed over to her, his noodle-y arms flailing everywhere. “I didn’t say anything. Maybe it was a ghost? What exactly did they say?”

She opened her mouth, and then a voice that Belle could now tell definitely wasn’t Dipper’s hissed “You’ll pay for what you’ve done.”

“You heard that, right?” she asked.

He nodded, and pulled his notebook out of his costume. Of course he’d brought his notebook -- he’d spent a lot of time researching ghosts and would want to have that research on him in a potentially haunted situation. “Let me see what we’re dealing with here. There’s the disembodied voice saying foreboding stuff -- that puts us at at least Category 3. Has anything else happened?”

“I felt a tap on my shoulder, but when I turned around, there was nothing there.”

He started to chew on the end of his pen. “Hmm, partial corporeality. Doesn’t really tell us much.”

“D-do you think it’s a ghost?”

“Definitely,” he replied, without a hint of nervousness in his voice. “I wonder if it’ll do anything else.”

“Do you want me to put on a show for you? Is that what you want?” came a voice from behind them.

Dipper and Belle swiveled around instantly, and found themselves face-to-face with an old man, which ordinarily wouldn’t have been too frightening, because it was Halloween and he might’ve given them candy, but this old man was pale white, glowing, and almost definitely a -

“GHOST!” they both screamed, and the old man started to cackle. They turned around and raced for the door, but the ghost got in their way.

“I’ve waited too long for you to show up! You’re not getting away that easy!”

The twins skidded on their heels and changed course, heading for the window.

“Nope! That won’t work, Sterlings! You’re mine now, and I’m never going to let you go!”

Belle’s heart was racing at the speed of light, and she felt like she was going to be sick. Beside her, Dipper was vibrating, and she couldn’t tell if it was from fear or excitement. He opened his mouth and the voice that came out was high-pitched and squeaky. “Wh-what did we do? Why have you been waiting for us?”

The ghost cackled again. “You don’t even know what you’ve done! That’s so rich. Here, why don’t I give you a reminder?” He started to float toward them, and Belle’s mind short-circuited.

“Simia arcu impetum ignis!” she cried, thrusting her palm forward.

“No, Belle -” Dipper started to yell, but it was too late -- a pulsating fireball shot from her hand and exploded halfway between Dipper and the ghost. Searing pain stretched over Belle’s arms, and the room was filled with screaming. Then, everything went black.

---

Belle’s eyes sprang open. It took her a moment to remember where she was and what was going on, and then she scrambled to her feet.

“Dipper?” she asked cautiously, although it came out as much more of a yell. She couldn’t hear anything over the ringing in her ears, though she wasn’t sure whether that was because he wasn’t moving or because of the explosion that had just happened. She tried to look around, but the room was too thick with smoke. She pulled out her phone, which was thankfully still in her back pocket, to see if the flashlight would help her see, and then she heard it.

A moan, low and warbling, coming from somewhere near her feet. She yelped and jumped up, readying herself to launch another fireball if she needed to. “Whoever’s there, show yourself!”

“Belle…” came Dipper’s voice.

Belle shined her phone toward the ground, and waved away some of the smoke. Dipper was lying on his back, face contorted in pain. “Dipper!” she yelled, kneeling down next to him. He didn’t look good, but she couldn’t immediately see any wounds so she figured he was probably at least okay for now. “I’m so glad you’re okay!”

“Belle… Ugh, you’ve gotta watch out next time. That… that spell was right next to my head, owww…”

His words were a little slurred, and she panicked for a moment that he was more hurt than he seemed. His body falling apart would be the absolute worst way for him to remember that he’s really a demon.

“What hurts, what can I do to help?”

“It’ll be fine, it’s just a headache,” he said, words interspersed with winces as he attempted to lift himself to his feet. “You know I’m sensitive to magic.”

She rushed to help him while mentally yelling at herself because actually she had forgotten that he was sensitive to magic because it had been a while since it had been relevant.

“I think we’re in the basement,” he said once he was steady on his feet.

“Let’s get out of here. This was a disaster.”

“No, this was awesome!” He bounced in place despite his obvious pain. “That was a real ghost! I can’t believe he has a vendetta against us -- we should find out what’s going on!”

“Are you serious? He was threatening to hurt us! We should go home!”

He looked at her up and down, and then at their surroundings. “Okay. Maybe a little recon would be good.” He didn’t sound particularly scared, but his hand mysteriously reached down to hold hers.

They made their way over fallen wooden beams and around broken furniture to a rickety staircase, which led directly outdoors. Belle let out a sigh of relief. They were out of there. They were going to go home, and she was going to call Onika and babble about the ghost that tried to kill them, and then Dipper would get his pinboard out and start drawing lines and conspiracies everywhere, and everything would be okay.

Then a familiar voice broke into her thoughts. “You stupid kids! Where do you think you’re going?”

They both swiveled around. The ghost was standing in a large hole in the side of the building -- apparently Belle’s fireball had a greater range than she thought. However, the ghost seemed a bit… different. He wasn’t glowing anymore, and was coughing through the still-settling dust, which seemed like a weird thing for a ghost to have to do.

Dipper’s eyes boggled. “You’re taking human form! How is that possible? Not even the strongest ghosts can do that without outside help! Are you working with a demon?” The last word felt like a kick to the stomach to Belle, but she clenched her teeth and said nothing.

“I’m not a real ghost, idiot!” The man broke into another coughing fit, and stepped out of the building. In the moonlight, Belle could see a sickly substance dripping off of him. “Haven’t you ever been to an arranged haunting before? You weren’t in any danger, you didn’t have to destroy the apartment!”

Belle’s jaw dropped. “An arranged haunting? Y-you’re not a real ghost?”

“No! This is just stage ectoplasm, and the door and furniture were all hooked up to a remote control! Did you even read the contract when you hired me?”

“Belle?” Dipper hissed. “What is he talking about? Did you know about this?”

“No, I swear I have no idea what he’s talking about! It… it must’ve been Onika! She’s the one who told me this place was haunted!”

Dipper facepalmed. “Stars above, why?” He took a deep breath, and turned to the not-ghost. “Sir? We’re sorry for uhh blowing up your apartment! We weren’t told that this was an arranged haunting, and also we’re only 14 so please don’t sue us!”

“Are you serious? You’re going to pay for what you did to me!”

“Okay. Plan B. Run for it!” Dipper hollered. Belle didn’t need telling twice -- they both started sprinting toward the hill.

“Stop, you hooligans!” The old man ran after them, surprisingly quickly for someone that old.

Belle glanced behind them. “He’s going to catch us!”

“No!” Dipper replied. “We can do this!”

“I can’t run that fast -- my costume is too long!”

“Gotcha!” came the man’s voice. He grabbed Belle’s wrist in a weird, twisting motion, and she shrieked in pain. She almost fell over, but the man held her upright.

Dipper skidded to a halt up ahead. “Belle!”

“Why’d you do that, you big meanie, that really hurt!” she gibbered at the old man.

He glared down at her. Standing directly beneath a streetlight, and still dripping with stage ectoplasm, he lit up with an ominous aura. “That’s what criminals like you get for destroying my business!”

“Let go of her, you… you monster!” Dipper yelled. Belle could barely see him in the dark, but something was making his eyes glow. She really hoped it wasn’t what she thought it was.

“Monster? Watch your tongue, young man! It’s you who’s the monster here! You’ve got no respect! I’ve seen your type before -- one minute you’re vandalizing private property, next you’re out there spilling blood and running from the law! You’re coming with me down to the police station. Some time in a holding cell will do you good -- knock some sense into you so you can be a decent human being!”

Belle gaped at the man’s ridiculous spiel. “Please stop, we’re sorry, please just let us go!”

“You should’ve thought of that earlier! You’re coming with me, princess!”

He jerked her forward by the wrist, and the pain made her vision go blurry.

“Stop right there!!” Dipper yelled, and his wobbling voice reverberated through the area. “Let her go now… or else!”

“You’re nothing but a miserable hoodlum, kid, and you’ve got some nerve threatening me after what you did!”

Belle managed to focus her eyes, and peered over toward her brother. He was definitely glowing at this point -- light flooding from his sun-shaped headdress, though whether he was aware of this she didn’t know. He pointed a finger at them, and Belle fell to the ground, released from the man’s grip. She scrambled away from him -- less because she was worried about what the man would do, and more because she was worried about what Dipper was about to do.

“Dipper, I’m okay -” she started.

“Why, you little gremlin! I’ll get you!”

“T͎̹͓̝͈̬̟͔̅͂͑ͩ̑͜h͎͕͎̮͍͙͍͔̎͊͑́̕͟ǎ͖̄̋ͧ̅ͬ̄ţ̛̼̤̖̙͎͖̦̬̽̆̃́̑ͅ'̶̢̨͚͚̮̐͊̾͊ͪͦ̃s͕͚̮̫̺ͪ̉̃͝ ̢ͭ̂̈̅͢͏͇̭̻͇̬̦Ė̦͓̥̹̠͎̈͊̇͗̍̕͟͞ͅN̶̳̮̜̫̭̣̝̣ͭ͌̉̈̃ͫ͌̚͞O̬͖͙̝͕̦̟͍̅̾̌͢U̷̞̰͕̞̗ͩͬ͑͊̄ͪ̈́͘͘G̛̫̞̱̍Ĥ͖͔̥͇̠̬͇̾ͩ!̛̗̥͆̆̋͐ͩ͊̽” Dipper screeched.

For a moment, the world seemed still but for the sound of Dipper’s voice echoing through the air. Belle heard a creak behind her, and rolled over to see the man almost over her. Then she heard the creak again, and looked up just in time to see the streetlight above them swing, once... twice… and then snap.

Belle screamed. The man paused, his expression twisting from anger to confusion, and he looked up to see what had frightened her. He barely had time to jump out of the way before the streetlight hit the ground and exploded, right where he’d been standing not a moment ago.

There was a blinding light and a wave of heat that seared Belle’s skin. She braced herself and squeezed her eyes shut in pain, but she couldn’t block out the image burned into her retinas. Through the ringing in her ears, she could dimly hear the man swear and stumble back, but she could barely concentrate on that, not with her heart beating so fast and her senses completely overloaded.

What felt like minutes passed as the heat of the fire and the ringing in her ears gradually lessened. When she opened her eyes, the man was a good twenty feet away. His arm was raised to point at her -- no, at someone behind her -- and he had a look of pure terror on his face.

He saw her move and jumped back. “Call off your demon!” he yelled. “I’ll leave you alone! Please just stop!” Then he turned around and ran away as fast as he could.

Belle’s heart sank. She didn’t want to know what was going on behind her, but she knew she’d have to get up eventually. She rolled onto her stomach, and finally dared to peer into the night.

Dipper was lying on the ground up ahead -- the glow was gone but she could see him easily because of his costume. She struggled to her feet and wobbled her way over. His eyes were closed, but he was still breathing. Whatever happened -- whatever he did must’ve taken a lot out of him. She planted her butt on the ground and buried her face in her hands. This wasn’t meant to happen -- it was just supposed to be a fun treat that Dipper would enjoy in a human capacity. And now…

There was a choking noise, and she picked her head up. Dipper, eyes still closed, spluttered for a bit, and then went back to slow, steady breathing. He looked so peaceful -- she tried to imagine he was just resting on the grass after a long day. He looked so harmless, too -- just a regular human boy wearing a silly costume and claws -

She felt something inside of her snap. Claws. Stupid claws! What was she doing wrong? Why did something have to blow up in her face at every turn? She balled her hands into fists and punched the ground, trying to hold back the tears. Why couldn’t her dumb brother stop being a demon for a single second and just be happy?!

She took a deep breath, in and out, and unclenched her fists. She reached a hand toward his, but before she could make contact, the air twisted weirdly, and then his nails matched hers. Dull and human.

Something hitched in Belle’s throat. She laid back on the grass, and let the tears fall.

(AO3 link)

[jo-anna-marie]

Paint Me A Picture

Paint Me A Picture 

Grace stared uncomprehending at the elderly woman standing behind the peeling, tan counter-top. However, she quickly regained her senses after glimpsing herself in the stranger’s large, square cut glasses. “How much for just the paint?” she asked, her calloused, stained fingers tightening around the meager tip money she earned from her shift at the diner.

“Um...well, let’s see. It will be 34.99 for the whole color set.” Mary, according to the magnetic tag attached to her green vest, smiled sympathetically. “Now, don’t you move. I think I might just have a coupon around here somewhere!” Mary opened and closed several drawers behind her before pulling out a pack of discount tickets.  

“I’ll take the paint...just the paint, for now.” Grace blew out the breath she was holding, before handing over all the money in her hand. She was still a few cents shy of the total, but both women pretended not to notice. “Thank you...um, Mary.” Her gratitude was real but fleeting. Her mind was already wandering to the night ahead. 

“You’re welcome. I didn’t get your name,” Mary replied, but the girl was already on the other side of the clear door.  

Grace held her purchase close to her chest, the tubes clicking together inside the flimsy plastic bag. Just three blocks later and she was walking up the uneven steps to her apartment. Her key slid in without resistance and she opened the door to the dark, empty space. After flipping the switch, the light blinked several times before illuminating the familiar living room slash dining room. It was bare of furniture, but littered with unfinished canvas paintings, ripped up charcoal sketches, pencil shavings and mugs full of dirty water.  

The microwave beeps for the third time before Grace finally pulls out tonight’s dinner. She ate greasy fried chicken from directly out of the take away container. She regrets not opting for the baked rigatoni from work. However, taking a large swig from the cheap  bottle of  whiskey made her meal go down easier. Sitting criss cross on the floor, her now nearly empty, glass bottle and her full, untouched tubes of colors lay in front of her. She had fruitlessly searched for a scrap of clean, white paper. How could she paint?  Perhaps she could pick up an extra shift this week. Try to smile more, like her red faced, potbellied manager suggested. Her fingers stretched as if stiff from lack of movement. She needed to paint tonight, or find more whiskey. 

Her head whipped behind her at the sharp sound of her neighbor slamming a door shut. Or at least she hoped it was the door. She didn’t like to stick her nose in other people’s business. She liked to keep to herself, the only trait she shared with her mother, Temperance. Though some people thought  they shared a lot of physical attributes too. This was a kind of compliment for Grace and an insult to Temperance. 

Peering at the thin, white wall that separated apartment number 3 from 4, Grace noticed how bare it looked. Almost like one of her canvases. But if she painted it, wouldn’t she get in some kind of trouble? It could always be painted white again, she reasoned.  

Standing upright, Grace gathered her supplies and refilled a mug with fresh water from the sink. She started mixing colors and sweeping her brush one way and then the other. It was always like this for her. Never knowing the outcome until she stopped, or ran out of paint or space. 

There was a sting in her right side that caused her to shift and wake from her spot on the hard floor. Pushing herself up, Grace found a  paintbrush snapped in half which had left a long scratch on her arm. Her blood had turned the bristles a reddish-brown. Her head was hurting as well. The thought that she should consider giving up drinking left as quickly as it came.

 Once she had committed to waking, Grace saw herself staring back. She had painted a life-sized self-portrait. It was like looking into a mirror. She was unsure if this was her best or worst piece.  

She pulled her eyes away when she heard the loud, unforgiving beeping from her alarm. It was morning and she needed to hurry or else be late for work. The breakfast shift was the worst. Employees and customers tended to be tired and short on patience and money. Not to mention hungover. 

No time to change, let alone clean up. Grace brushed her teeth with the last remainder of whiskey. She’d need more soon. “Well, I guess this is goodbye for now.” Grace laughed, suddenly feeling self-conscious. A quick glance at her cheap, plastic wristwatch and she was rushing out the door. It was dark when she finally returned, picking up a second shift but still short on tips. She must try to make an effort with her appearance, or at least her attitude. 

Walking straight to the fridge and finding it lacking, Grace grabs a stale bag of chips for dinner. She listens to two messages, both debt collectors, and startles to a stop at the sight in front of her. She forgot, almost, about her mural. 

It was eerie how precisely the image matched, from the frizzy, murky brown hair down to her scuffed trainers. She looked homeless, though she had a home. No wonder she never got any good tips. What a mess, she thought. “I’m going to paint over you when I get paid. I’m not a fan of roommates.” Grace’s laughter echoed in the empty room. 

She couldn’t move, couldn’t breathe. No, wait she can breathe but it feels more  like drowning. She chokes on short, shallow sips of air that barely reach her lungs before she spits it back out. Something heavy is pressing her down deep, an unmovable weight over her entire body. It is dark, but her eyes start to adjust and she can see shapes and shadows.  Her body is slick with a cold sweat, making goosebumps form and fine hairs stand up. She can’t move her head, but her eyes flick back and forth. After a moment she finds another pair of dark eyes staring back at her before she jerks fully awake and mobile. Her whole body hasn’t felt this tense and sore since her art modeling days when she would have to keep still for hours at a time. Back when she was confident in her mind and body, in the knowledge that she was helping other artists, and that she was, in those moments, art itself. 

Her breath slowed as the adrenaline started to fade but she didn’t know if she could sleep. Grasping at the lamp sitting on her makeshift nightstand, all at once the room became too bright and hurt her eyes. It’s been a long time since she had a nightmare. Maybe it’s because she didn’t have a drink tonight. She would head to the store tomorrow. It was her only vice, beside ink and paper. 

She spent the rest of the night drifting in and out of sleep until her alarm went off. How was she supposed to go back to work? She couldn’t call out, even if she didn’t feel well.. She needed the money. She pulled the sleeve of  her coat from an unstable stack of half-completed paintings. As she reached for her purse, Grace saw movement in her peripheral. Her heart thudded in her chest as she remembered her nightmare. It was herself, or rather her image. It seemed to her off center but then she didn’t trust herself. In truth she barely remembered that night. Her nerves were shot. 

Today was a good day, well as good as it could get for someone like her. A drunk couple over tipped her at the restaurant which allowed Grace to buy takeout and liquor. She was almost happy, walking briskly up the cracked concrete steps to apartment number 3. Closing the door and walking straight to the kitchen for an actual glass and metal fork. Grace often borrowed food from work but it was rare that she was able to buy something she wanted. She was warm and full from dinner, before she saw it. Before she realized that her image was  missing from the painting. It was impossible. 

Did someone do this? Did she do this but not remember? She was sure that she saw the painting this morning, before work and now it’s gone. Grace poured herself a glass. And then a second and third before facing the empty wall once again. What should she do? Move? She had nowhere else to go. Call the police? And tell them what exactly, that she disappeared. They’d send her to some sort of hospital but then maybe she belonged there. 

After a few minutes she finally noticed something. At the edge of the wall, there were a few smears of brown paint, the exact same shade as her hair. Grace came closer and reached out until her hand touched the plaster. BAM! She almost fell at the sharp snap of a door closing. It must be her neighbor again. Her heart banged against her chest as she pressed her hand against the wall again. It felt odd, almost warm like someone’s body heat after they’ve been sitting a while. But then the heating vent was directly above, so maybe that explained it. Though Grace’s heart refused to slow it’s steady beat. 

For the first time in years, Grace wished for her mother. She could call her but she didn’t know what she would say to her. Temperance would not have the capacity to believe such a story. She only read memoirs and was far from the imaginative, creative type. The only paints she used were cosmetics and even then she always chose the wrong colors for her canvas. It’s one of the many reasons that they only see each on holiday. What would her mother see if she could look at her now? Would she recognize her own daughter? 

Grace went to the bathroom and turned on the water, twisting the knob so that it was scalding hot. She was tired and had been drinking more than usual. That’s why she’s seeing things. Grace’s body turned pink from the soap scrub and hot water. It was a small relief when her feet touched the cool tiles, though the rest of the small room was filled with steam making her feel sticky. Her hand swiped across the mirror above her sink, wiping away a small circle of moisture. She did not see her reflection. Only the towel rack behind her. 

Grace locked her bedroom door for the first time since she moved into this apartment and lay down with the lamplight still on. Her last thought before she fell asleep was that she could not find her shadow on the wall. 

After Grace was reported missing, news articles and bloggers would accuse Temperance of being coldhearted. For trying to profit off of her daughter’s artwork. Temperance rather thought it was the buyers who wanted to own these drawings and paintings, even the unfinished ones, that were devoid of feeling. Grace had disappeared but her debt remained. Unpaid rent  and overdue student loans were passed to her. Even Grace’s former classmates, her so-called friends, had  started selling their sketches and stories. It hurt to know that her daughter’s naked body was hanging on some stranger's wall. Temperance would find it in herself to forgive these things if only she could see her daughter. Not her paintings or her likeness, but Grace in the flesh. 

A year later and people still come in to buy the same paint set that the girl bought before she went missing. Mary shakes her head and  does not offer any of them a coupon. In fact, she breathes a little easier when they are on the other side of the glass door. 

[australianservices1]

Why Custom Plastic Cutting?

Plastic cut to size is one of the best sold and popular plastic products, as it enables our customers to create finished products in the most effective manner. At Plastic Online we provide a wide range of plastic materials such as clear Perspex sheet cut to size, simplifying your manufacturing processes and making it possible to develop the most unique and innovative products.

Here are the types of plastic we provide cut to size:

·        ABS

ABS stands for Acrylonitrile Butadiene Styrene and is an opaque thermoplastic and amorphous polymer. ABS can be heated to its melting point, cooled, and re-heated again with very little degradation, which makes it easy to recycle multiple times. Popular products made with ABS include LEGO toys, keys on computer keyboards, and plastic face-guards on wall sockets.

·        Acetal Rod

Acetal rod is a semi-crystalline plastic that has good wear properties in wet environments. It barely absorbs moisture and is used in close tolerance mechanical parts and electrical insulators. Acetal rod is resistant to chemicals such as solvents but does not behave well in abrasive wear applications.

·        ACM

ACM stands for aluminium composite material, a material with good dimensional stability and two times lighter than aluminium. ACM is obtained by bonding two pre-painted aluminium sheets to a polyethylene core and is used in indoor and outdoor applications requiring a sleek look and good dimensional stability.

·        Acrylic

Acrylic, also called PMMA Poly (methyl methacrylate) is a transparent thermoplastic homopolymer known by multiple trade names, including Plexiglass and Perspex. It was developed as an impact-resistant alternative to glass and it was first produced in 1928. Acrylic is one of the clearest plastics on the market and is currently used for paint, acrylic nails, lenses, security barriers, medical devices, furniture, and LCD screens.

·        Acrylic Mirror

Acrylic mirror is used as an alternative to glass mirror and is preferred because it has ten times the impact strength of glass. It is a plastic highly reflective mirrored surface with a grey backing on the reverse and is used in the following applications: gym mirror, display cases, retail display, architectural design, cosmetic display, and home use.

·        Decorative Designed Acrylic Panel

This material is a specialty acrylic sheet used by architects, designers, and interior decorators. This type of plastic has made it possible to create attractive furniture and decorative spaces in unique textures and colours. Unlike other plastic materials, decorative acrylic sheets have unparalleled light diffusion properties.

·        Corrugated Flute

Corrugated flute board has revolutionised the storage and shipping of goods due to its ability to protect various items from shocks and damage. It is a stronger alternative to paperboard cartons and comes in different wall thicknesses, known as flutes size:

o   E-Flute: 1/16" thick, 90 flutes per linear foot

o   B-Flute: 1/8" thick, 47 flutes per linear foot

o   C-Flute: 3/16" thick, 39 flutes per linear foot

o   A-Flute: 1/4" thick, 33 flutes per linear foot

·        Foam PVC

Commonly used in the display and exhibition industry, PVC foam sheet has been created by German chemist Eugen Baumann in 1872. Also known as expanded PVC, it comes in a range of densities and is highly resistant to moisture and various chemicals.

·        HDPE Polyethylene

HDPE (high density poly ethylene) is one of the most versatile plastic materials, with a variety of applications, such as cutting boards, piping, bleach bottles, shampoo bottles, milk jugs, and plastic bottles. Aside from food applications, HDPE is found in unexpected applications like snowboards, shoe lasts, beverage containers, and plastic surgery.

·        Nylon

Nylon is a widely-used synthetic plastic material usually manufactured as a fibre. It can be melted to form fibres, filaments, and bristles, but it can also be formed into moulded products that have a high resistance to wear, heat, and chemicals.

·        Polycarbonate

Polycarbonate is an amorphous thermoplastic that is naturally transparent and commercially available in a variety of colours. This material is used in applications that require internal transmission of heat and impact resistance (such as bullet-proof glass). Other applications of polycarbonate are eyewear, automotive components, medical devices, greenhouses, protective gear, and exterior lighting fixtures.

·        Polypropylene

Polypropylene is a rigid and crystalline thermoplastic found in medical devices, packaging trays, household products, and battery cases. It is one of the most widely-used polymers today and it has the lowest density among plastics available on the market. There are multiple types of polypropylene available:

o   Polypropylene Homopolymer

o   Polypropylene Copolymer 

o   Polypropylene, Impact Copolymer

o   Expanded Polypropylene

o   Polypropylene Terpolymer

o   Polypropylene, High Melt Strength (HMS PP)

·        Prismatic Light Diffuser

Polycarbonate prismatic light diffusers are produced with a textured finish on one side with the purpose of transmitting and diffusing light while reducing glare. Typical applications are fluorescent light fittings, lighting lenses, and ceiling lighting tiles.

·        Egg Crate

Egg crate panels are a lightweight and cost-effective solution for fluorescent light cover needs (garages, recreation rooms, office buildings, basements, kitchen and bath fixtures, and residential locations).

·        PVC

PVC is the world’s third-most widely produced synthetic plastic polymer and is used in a huge range of applications, like building and construction, health care, electronics, automotive, etc.

·        UHMWPE Polyethylene

Ultrahigh-molecular-weight polyethylene (UHMWPE) is the first material of choice in total joint replacements due to properties such as biocompatibility, wear resistance, and structural strength. Aside from medical applications, it is used to produce fibre, wires, and marine infrastructure.

Why Custom Plastic Cutting

There are multiple reasons to use Perspex cut to size or any other plastic cut to custom dimensions by Plastic Online Australia:

·        Less error

Humans make mistakes, no matter how skilled and experienced they are. In today’s manufacturing environment, human error is a major concern. The competition is high and the demands of customers are even higher; even the smallest mistake can damage the reputation of a company. This is why Plastic Online uses laser cutting machines to obtain cut to size plastic materials.

These automatised machines are provided instructions by a computer and they do their job seamlessly, ensuring a degree of consistency that is not possible with human hands. Every product will be identical with the one preceding it, every single time.

·        Precise results

Laser cutting has high accuracy and can be used for the production of parts with complex internal and external contours and different shapes.

·        Customers will get the product faster

The method you choose for cutting your materials will have a major impact on the quality of the finished product and on the time needed to manufacture it. By using materials such as Perspex cut to size near, your customers will get their products sooner as Plastic Online takes care of the cutting using the latest technologies and you can focus on other important aspects of manufacturing.

Having to perform intricate design work by hand takes a lot of time, especially on complex projects. Laser cutting, on the other hand, makes it possible to obtain precise cuts in a short time-frame. The speed of laser processing is multiple times higher than by traditional methods, ensuring the readiness of products in the shortest possible time.

·        Keeping things clean

Most forms of mechanical cutting generate heat and can have unwanted effects on the finished product, such as surface scuffing or minor warping. This can make lines appear inaccurate or low quality. With laser cutting performed by Plastic Online, warping is reduced to a minimum as only a small area is affected by heat. Material contamination risk is reduced as well during the cutting due to the lack of contact with physical cutting tools.

How Perspex cut to size near is obtained

Acrylic or Perspex is perfect for laser processing, a process making it possible to obtain the most creative point of sale displays and illuminated advertisements.

No additional processing is required and panels up to 25 mm can be cut efficiently and cost-effectively. The CO2 laser creates matted finishes, while the fibre laser is used to create colour changes.

A CAD file is required in order to cut a particular design from acrylic material. The process is carried out by a machine that emits laser that cuts through the material by burning or vaporizing it. This way, edges are round, surfaces are smooth, and more nuanced designs can be created.

Laser cutting needs to be performed in controlled environments by trained staff as it generates extremely high temperatures. The heat causes the material to produce fumes that can be dangerous to health. Protective gear (mask and goggles) is recommended to prevent inhaling toxic fumes.

Even if nowadays there are multiple solutions to cut acrylic, there are multiple factors involved in the cutting process, such as the brand and type of acrylic to cut, choosing the right acrylic cutting machine, setting up a working table, preparing the acrylic sheet, setting up the laser cutting acrylic machine, and handling the actual process to obtain precise and smooth cuts.

Getting your acrylic or other plastic material cut to size from Plastic Online is the most effective and productive option.  You can order and purchase all your plastic material needs right here online 24/7/365. Once you’ve placed your order, our team will cut to size the type of plastic material you need and ship it to you from our Gold Coast locations to anywhere in Australia. Contact us today for all your plastic production and custom cutting needs!

[memoirsofagenie]

Jersey Sails: From La Corbière to Cape Florida

Genie, 09/26/2020 

(Short-story submitted to the [24th Annual] 2020 Zoetrope: All-Story Short Fiction Competition)

Put together a bay, a barrier reef, stretches of white sand, luscious vegetation, protected species and a lighthouse, and pirate stories start to abound. Honestly, who wasn’t an indigenous pirate of sorts in the Village of Key Biscayne? The majority of “Key Rats” (as Key Biscayners informally call themselves) had always taken pride in having very heterogeneous backgrounds and on being endowed with an innate seafaring force, and Jordana’s own family history didn’t fall far from this paradigm, considering they were Italians from Rome, albeit with an Abruzzese heritage, who had lived in over four continents before settling on the Key during Jordana’s early twenties. More than a Key Rat, she was a full-fledged third-culture kid.

Being now in her mid-forties and living with her widowed father, Jordana had heard, overheard, eavesdropped on and collected so many other tales of fellow local pirates, that she sometimes pondered whether she should group them in a volume. Not only did she thrive on historical details, but writing was truly her forte, so what was holding her back? Somewhere in the recesses of her mind, she always felt the next story was going to be better… until the afternoon of August 17, 1992.

That August Monday, like all others after returning from work, Jordana picked-up her mail and engaged in another ritualistic habit of hers, that of chit-chatting with the front-door neighbor Uma, an elderly, retired politics college professor and widow from India who, with equal customary precision, would walk her rust Dobermann at 6:00pm sharp, not without first saying hello and providing the daily recap of salient gossip at the Harbor Drive waterfront condo where they both lived and from where the gorgeous Vizcaya could be admired across Biscayne Bay. Yet that afternoon, instead of watching one of Uma’s many colorful and glitzy dupattas and sarees blowing in the island breeze as was usually the case immediately after saying “see you tomorrow”, Uma invited Jordana for tea. It turns out she had walked the dog earlier, to dodge the sporadic thunderstorm of the day, a typically South Floridian late-summer meteorological phenomenon, much like the notorious London drizzle in winter.

Soon enough, as the beautiful Hindo-Islamic wood-carved door -a family heirloom which she had brought to America all the way from her native Jaipur when she got married- of Uma’s apartment closed behind them, the storm continued brewing and thunders started rolling. Jordana didn’t take much heed of the noises in the sky, because having tea at Uma’s was always a very relaxing and otherworldly experience, in particular after the fumes of incense and the aromas of her signature masala chai concoction steeping in boiling water would make shapes and shadows that sparkled across the “sheesh mahal”, or hall of mirrors… because that is exactly what Uma’s dining-room looked like, being as it was, plastered in multicolored Rajasthani marble intarsia and ornate thikri glasswork. However, the enchantment would soon break, because the retired politics professor also loved to have the TV on while sipping her tea.

               “Breaking News: We interrupt this newscast to give you a detailed update of tropical storm Andrew’s trajectory,” the reporter said. “The tropical storm has now become a Category 3 hurricane and it might make landfall in Miami later this week…”

               “This is insane. Are you hearing this, beti?” Uma exclaimed as she hastily stirred her chai, making alarming clanging sounds.

               “Yes, I’m listening... What a drag, to have to go through evacuation again! Oh well… let us keep our fingers crossed and hope it makes a last-minute eastward turn, that way we don’t have to deal with it!” Jordana was always very hopeful, because having lived on the Key longer, not only had she already been through strong hurricanes, but she was also well aware of the possibility that even when landfall was imminent, the maleficent twisters could turn around and recede into the ocean.

The two women continued sipping their tea and chatting. Suddenly, it was dinner time, so Jordana thanked her hostess and left for her apartment. She had started opening and scanning through her mail while Uma was preparing the tea a couple of hours earlier, however a quirky golden, mildly distressed envelope had caught her eye, as both the stationery and the handwriting did not look familiar at first glance. The gulab jamun and tamarind chutney golgappas that Uma had served with chai had left her full, so she simply skipped dinner, slipped quickly into her pajamas and drew the mail from her purse, picking the mysterious bulky missive from the stack.

The postmark was less than a week old, but the location itself had completely blurred from the letter, making it hard to determine its actual provenance. What is more, the envelope lacked the names of both the recipient and the sender. Given Jordana’s fondness of the art of letter-writing and her eternal quest for original stationeries, she could only surmise that this singular quality of paper was rather old and out of production; still, this realization did not help much either.

Hence, giving in to her curiosity, she opened the letter, only to find a telegraphic, ten-line message in what seemed to be an old French Patois with a Gaelic twang or a Creole dialect of yore… who knows! This fact alone unleashed a myriad theories and resolutions in her head, because among the many Key Rats and island pirates, Haitian and other French-Antilles’ descendants were not uncommon. Tracking the true intended reader of the letter would not have been so challenging after all. Nonetheless, the contents of the envelope did not stop there, for accompanying the letter were ten black-and-white pictures of maritime settings that could have been taken anywhere on America’s Northeastern or Western Coasts, if it weren’t for the tenth picture, depicting a medieval hilltop castle, perched on the sea, surrounded by houses of what could easily have been -in view of the fuzziness- French Breton, Spanish Cantabrian, Galician, or Southern English fishing-village architecture.

Might this be the “story of stories” Jordana was awaiting in order to finally consolidate her volume of local pirate tales? Jordana was too tired to brainstorm that night. She went to sleep, resolving to drop by the quiet village library the next day after work, to start delving into the population archives while hoping to unearth some clues.

She would have to wait another week, sadly! The very next morning, as she glided through the Rickenbacker Causeway on her convertible red FIAT 500, the radio announcers made it clear that Hurricane Andrew, now a Category 4, was at the doors of the Panhandle. It was gaining more strength by the hour and was expected to enter precisely through Key Biscayne. Jordana was well-prepared for the chaos that was about to ensue. She still did her best to go to work with a positive outlook, shuffling the black-and-white pictures in her head, when it suddenly dawned on her that she HAD indeed seen the medieval castle before, but where?

In the days that followed, Jordana duly prepped the house for Hurricane Andrew, which by August 23rd had become a Category 5. She and her father would normally evacuate to the North, in Palm Beach. But this year, her father had been vacationing in Rome for the last two months and was not due to return before mid-September, leaving Jordana to brave the storm at Chavela’s  -a long-term family friend who, like may in the Magic City, had exiled from Cuba- house in Coral Gables.

The wind monster ravaged South Florida the night between August 24 and 25. Despite the expected curfew after such an emergency, Jordana returned home to Key Biscayne the morning of the 25th. As also expected, the island had literally become, yet again, a boat anchorage. All of Crandon Boulevard was a massive water puddle and the boats had been lifted from the side-canals and seashore, flying and landing onto the streets. She turned right onto Harbor Drive, even more scared of what she would find. Paradoxically enough, her apartment building bordered on the Key Biscayne Yacht Club.

Once home, she opened the door leading to the shared patio of the condo, where the pool was located. To the right, she could see the heaps of boats in the Yacht Club’s marina, one on top of the other. For some miraculous reason, no boat had crossed over to the pool, as had happened two years prior. Many club members and boat owners had rushed to the club and Jordana could overhear their chatter across the surrounding turquoise wooden lattice. She got even closer as the multiple conversations started to get more dramatic.

The club manager was holding a huge roll in his hand. It was a spare red sail that had flown off one of the many crammed vessels. With the aid of two other men, he decided to unroll it. It had no tag or distinguishing marks, so perhaps unrolling it might have revealed a symbol, a drawing or pattern that could help determine whose it was.

“Hey Bob, just hold it tight on that end, please,” said the manager to one of the two other men.

“Wait a minute, it looks like there’s a drawing. Wait, it’s some kind of shield, or at least it looks like it,” said the third man.

               As the three men kept unrolling, Jordana watched and listened intently. When the sail was completely open, a gust of wind lifted it momentarily allowing her a short glimpse of the so-called shield.

               “Hey, it’s not a shield. It’s a coat of arms, or so it seems. This sail belongs to Colin Peirson!” cried Bob.

To which Paul, the manager echoed “oh, well! Let us roll it back and put it in the storage. I will have to compile a list of all the damaged boats, in any case. I will call everyone, one by one, so eventually he’ll put it back where it belongs.”

               Jordana was uncertain whether it was a coat of arms or not. However, within the central shield were depicted the contours of the same castle; yes, that castle; the castle she had seen on one of the ten black-and-white pictures of the mysterious letter. She finally recalled that at some point during her first years in Key Biscayne, she had noticed the sail, fully blowing in the wind, in a bygone summer afternoon island regatta. Even back then, the castle had taken hold of her strong photographic memory, though with the passing of time, it had become one of the many beautiful but faded remembrances. Anyhow, atop the castle, waved a flag, which surely was the logo of the British Army, with the famous lion passant on the crest of St. Edward’s crown. Having quite a few military aficionados in the family, Jordana had no doubts, not to mention that when her dear mother was alive, they had frequently attended the spring military pilgrimages in Lourdes, where aside from reaffirming one’s faith, one could admire the distinct symbols and regalia of international military corps.

               Instead of staying in the patio and cleaning up, she stuck to her pre-hurricane plans and rushed to the library. The library was not exactly what one would call well-stocked, however the population archives, its collection of various encyclopedias, particularly the Encyclopaedia Britannica, and the microfiche section had always helped her during her college studies. Without further ado, she searched “Colin Peirson” and “British Army.”

She did remain skeptical during the process and thought to be off-track, because there was still the interrogative as to why the letter was in that hitherto unknown (to her) French-like language. And boy, was she off-track! As Jordana frenetically and enthusiastically read through her selected sources, her mind finally gained some clarity as she started reading about the Battle of Jersey between the English and the French during the American Revolutionary War.

“Goodness, how obvious!” she reckoned to herself. “This is no French Patois or Creole dialect,” she mused. Sure enough, it took her a further hour of information scavenging to arrive to the conclusion that the language of the letter was Jèrriais, or Jersey French. As for “Colin Peirson”, might he be a descendant of the hero of the Battle of Jersey, Major Peirson? On a side note, Jordana was also rather proud of her observational skills, for thinking that the architecture on the pictures might’ve been French Breton or Southern English, among others, wasn’t too far-fetched deep down!

While she admired John Singleton Copley’s impacting painting of the eponymous battle in one of the diverse sources consulted, Jordana’s head spinned as various historical scenarios played out in her head. There was only one thing left to do… she had to find Colin Peirson! The population archives of Key Biscayne indicated that, except for a six-month sojourn at the Le Phare condo on 798 Crandon Boulevard, he had always lived, ever since his arrival to South Florida, in the Southwest Point of the Mashta Island enclave.

The next day, Jordana decided to pay a visit to Mr. Peirson. As soon as she reached the address, she noticed she had unknowingly passed countless times in front of Mr. Peirson’s estate, for it was a palatial setting. Mr. Peirson’s house was not just the only house in the Southwest Point of Mashta Island, but it was also the only building in high Victorian style on Key Biscayne, a detail that clashed with the trademark Mackle and Cape Cod homes that populated the island from the 1960s onwards. Needless to say, Jordana had always wondered who lived in that fairy-tale, multi-colored house, of which the main particularities -aside from the Juliette balcony and the screened porch- were the steep turret flanking the southwestern corner of the building, covered in wooden scalloped shingles, and its topmost window made of intricately etched and stained glass, further framed by a carved dormer, depicting whimsical floral motifs. Jordana’s curiosity was particularly tickled by the hypothetical view from the turret. Who knows if Mr. Peirson would greet her, let alone invite her in to discuss the letter and possibly allow her to visit the turret?

Jordana made her way through the verdant, cobbled pathway leading to the door. She could hear all kinds of strange noises, something which reminded her Key Biscayne was basically two thirds parkland. It was not infrequent to be ambushed by iguanas, cranes, possums, raccoons… and asps, on occasion. Fortunately for her, this time she was only escorted by fluttering monarch butterflies and dragonflies.

Jordana knocked three times, when at last an elderly and jovial silver-haired gentleman opened the door. Matter-of-factly, he must’ve been rather handsome back in the day, as he was reminiscent of Paul Newman.

“Good morning. I’m looking for Mr. Peirson,” Jordana said.

“You found him. May I ask who you are and to what I owe this visit?” he replied.

“I believe I have something that belongs to you. For some reason, this letter was mailed to my house. I am sorry I had to open it, but as you may notice from the envelope, there is no discernible indication that it might have been yours. After a few coincidences and investigations, I finally found you,” Jordana explained.

“I’d love hear all about it. Do come in. I have just finished my breakfast,” Mr. Peirson said.

As Mr. Peirson locked the door behind them and guided Jordana to the living room, he drew the photographs from the envelope. With another gesture, he indicated the sofa, inviting her to sit down. He hastily looked at the pictures, two, three times. Jordana could see his piercing green eyes getting teary. As she explained what an ordeal it had been to track him down, all he could do was look at the pictures and sob, until he finally pulled himself together, dried his eyes and uttered “Wait here. I’ll be right back!”

Mr. Peirson shook a little, so before heading to what seemed to be his study, he picked up his cane. Once there, Jordana could hear him toiling with books and boxes. He was taking too long, so she got up from her armchair and walked to the threshold of the study door. As she stood peeking, she asked him if he needed any help. He gladly accepted. With his cane, he indicated what was apparently an oversized wooden music-box on the parquet floor.

“Can you please pick it up and open it?” he asked.

As she picked the box up and started lifting the lid, she took a quick look around the room and noticed that along the walls hung oversized posters of the ten pictures. What is more, the box itself contained a copy of the ten pictures too!

In the two minutes that it took Mr. Peirson to go sit at his desk, Jordana, still with the open box in hand, quickly analyzed for a second time her surroundings. The study was a rather dark place, seemingly of another era, so much so that the only things that shone were an old gramophone close to the door and a giant mother-of-pearl Jacobean shell. She hadn’t noticed either entering the study, but now she was thinking that perhaps she and Mr. Peirson might have something in common to talk about. If anything, they could break the ice further talking about Santiago de Compostela, a destination she had wanted to visit forever! Despite entertaining this thought, just as she was about to ask him about St. James’s Way -and possibly, his pilgrimage to Santiago- he took an old record from the first drawer of his desk: “Here dear, would you care to put this record on?”

He assumed Jordana would know how to activate the gramophone. Not that she really knew… but she did, nevertheless. She recalled some scenes of silent movies she had seen with her grandmother as a child and very nonchalantly loaded the record. The unmistakable and softly tremulous voice of Edith Piaf started resounding in the room: “quand il me prend dans ses bras, il me parle tout bas, je vois la vie en rose…” Before the Little Sparrow of France could bellow the following verses, Mr. Peirson had reached for the box containing the photographs that Jordana had left on his desk prior to loading the gramophone.

“I never thought I would tell anyone this story, let alone a stranger, but I feel I can trust you. Then again, you did go out of your way to find me, so you deserve to know. Say, dear, shall we go to the turret? We can admire the view and enjoy the breeze as we talk. Oh, and we can take the record upstairs. I have another gramophone up there. You seem to enjoy the wartime French chansonniers, don’t you? This record is a compilation of various artists. The next song is ‘La Mer’, by Charles Trenet.”

Jordana was really hoping he’d come up with the idea himself and got her wish of visiting the turret. Her inquiring mind was trying to guess where the staircase leading to the turret would be, as according to her sense of orientation and her mental planimetry of the house, she was pretty sure that the study was exactly perpendicular to the turret, so they were basically right below it.

As she tried to solve this puzzle too, she noticed yet another detail that had escaped her thus far. Behind Mr. Peirson’s desk hung a giant Flemish Gobelins tapestry depicting the ancient Greek myth of Daphne and Apollo. The coincidences, or signs, that her encounter with Mr. Peirson was meant to be increased by the second; being from Rome, her favorite statue had always been none other than the “Daphne and Apollo” by Gian Lorenzo Bernini kept at the Galleria Borghese! Anyhow, while she connected the dots and started daydreaming, Mr. Peirson had already vanished, only to pop out again after less than two minutes from behind the tapestry: “Well, dear, are you coming upstairs or not?”

“But of course!”, she exclaimed to herself. How could she have not imagined sooner that the door was behind the tapestry? Oh well!

Mr. Peirson had guessed correctly. Jordana loved the French chansonniers. In fact, she adored Charles Trenet, probably more than she did Piaf. She definitely did not want to miss the opportunity to partake of nostalgically wonderful European stories of the past while admiring the sea with great background music. Without wasting one second more, Jordana immediately grabbed the record, following him through the door and onto the coiled staircase of one-hundred-and-fifty steps. In normal circumstances, this would have been a tiresome exercise for Jordana, but the old man had made it altogether more bearable and somewhat inspirational by sharing anecdotes of how he had bought the plot of land where the house stood and how he had designed it.

“Ah… there it is, my dear! I give you the Cape Florida Lighthouse!” He exclaimed this with great pride and satisfaction as they both climbed the last step; clearly, both the turret and the view it provided were his labors of love. The beauty of Cape Florida was heightened by the radiant morning itself. One could see the white yachts, one by one, entering the water channels in procession and docking at No Name Harbor for the customary brunch at Boater’s Grill. The hurricane that had just passed had merely left some wrack along the shores; still and all, the water was so clear the yachts looked like aggregations of buoyant white manatees, the shadow of which was reflected further by the schools of glimmering swordfish swimming beneath them.

He resumed, “look again at these ten pictures. See this one? This was the view from my house back in Jersey. I grew up on a windswept clifftop, on the southwestern part of the island. We had a house, very much like this one, situated along a narrow alley crowning Le Mont du Petit Port. During the spring and well into the summer, I would climb our own steep turret and admire Beauport Beach on one side, Petit Port on the other side, and the lighthouse at La Corbière in between! Such delightful memories! As you can see, not only am I in the southwestern part of Key Biscayne, but every time I stare into the golden horizon and at the Cape Florida Lighthouse, my mind steadily flies back to those blissful days…”

“So, you took these all these pictures as a child?”, Jordana asked.

“I took these pictures, but not as a child; although, in hindsight, I was perhaps a child. In any case, it wasn’t until my seventeenth birthday that my favorite uncle, a diplomat at the American Embassy in Washington D.C., gave me a camera! It was December 1939, two years before the Attack on Pearl Harbor.”

“I see. It must’ve been excruciating, especially considering what happened over the next few years. Correct me if I’m wrong, but didn’t the Germans occupy the Channel Islands sometime during the summer of 1940?”, Jordana asked.

“So they did, my dear! So they did! The date was June 30, 1940!” As he said it, he couldn’t hide his malaise, briefly sighing and gasping for air. He then added, “and that is why I decided to continue our ancestral family business. For generations, we had been sailmakers. Logically, during the Occupation, the business was confiscated, so apart from sails, we also had to provide sacks or camping tents. Anyhow… whenever I had some spare time, I would dash out with my camera and immortalize beauty.”

“Did you have a choice? I mean, could you choose what to do?”, Jordana asked.

“Well, you must’ve noted I have to walk with a cane,” he replied.

“I did detect, but given the gist of our conversation, I had rather assumed that you might have been wounded in battle,” Jordana said.

“True, it could have been an option. But my shaking is a result of an injury. When I was fifteen, I had a bad fall while exploring the Minkies at low tide.”

“What are the Minkies?”, Jordana asked.

“Les Minquiers. Here they are,” he said, as he pulled out yet another photograph from the stack of ten. “We call them the Minkies. They’re a group islands off the coast of Jersey. Actually, islands and rocks. During the low tide, the rocks emerge. With two other friends, we would sneak out with a paddleboat every other Saturday during the summer of ’37. We loved exploring and walking on the rocks. One day I fell and fractured my ankle. Despite various medical therapies, I never fully recovered. That’s why I could never participate in active combat if enlisted in the army, nor could I drive properly. Therefore, I could only become a doctor, a cook, a photographer or follow into my father’s footsteps. I was no doctor and I most definitely couldn’t cook. Still can’t… “, he said, chuckling. “By the way, I realized I haven’t offered you anything. Would you like some freshly baked scones? I’ll tell Maria to bring some upstairs.”

               “Thank you, but don’t worry! I had breakfast before coming. I’d much prefer hearing more about the pictures,” Jordana replied. In the midst of this light moment, she decided it was a good time to bring up the castle. Before she could even start second-guessing herself, she boldly popped the question: “What castle is that? Having seen it on your sail at the yacht club, I imagine it must have a deeper significance than the rest of the pictures…”

               “Oh, c’est lé Vièr Châté, ma chère!” he exclaimed, mixing French and Jèrriais. “It’s Mont Orgueil, the Old Castle; Mount Pride; Haughty Mount… it’s Gorey Castle! And yes,” he paused for a moment and finished the phrase, “if you should know, it is near and dear to my heart!”

               “But just a second Mr. Peirson, I don’t see any battle or war scenes in these pictures. I don’t see any soldiers either,” Jordana pointed out, with a quizzical look.

               “Ah, well, you see, that’s exactly the point, my dear girl! As I said earlier, I pledged to myself to immortalize beauty. Now, Paul was a nurse apprentice at the Military Hospital. On occasion, he would accompany me and watch my back, and suggest views. Naturally, I gave him some copies as well,” he said. “Anyhow, Gorey Castle was the last picture I ever shot in Jersey. It was also the last time I saw Jersey, as Paul and I had decided to escape that very night. Except he ended up in Portugal and I ended up here, reinventing myself as a full-time professional photographer! He married a girl from Sintra and established himself as a high-school biology teacher, near the Promonotorium Magnum...”

               “Who is Paul and where is the Promontorium Magnum?” Jordana asked. “I used to be pretty good at geography, but I never heard of such place in Portugal…,” Jordana said.

               Mr. Peirson giggled, lifted his eyebrows in a mischievous way and replied: “really, and have you heard of the Rock of Lisbon? Oh, and Paul was my closest friend since childhood.”

               Again, Jordana was feeling surprised and slightly embarrassed she hadn’t heard of either place. It was not like her to be unprepared in certain matters, but Mr. Peirson giggled again and broke the silence, revealing the enigma: “I’m pulling your leg, dear. He lived near Cabo da Roca. Leonor, his lovely wife, was the daughter of the lighthouse keeper.”

               At this juncture, Jordana was undecided. Should she ask more about the letter and its contents, or should she ask how he and Paul escaped? She opted for the former. “I hate to pry, but is the letter from Paul?”

               “Sort of,” Mr. Peirson said. “We spoke and wrote regularly, but sadly he passed away a year ago. I had intended to go to his funeral, but at the last minute Leonor told me to wait, as he didn’t really want to be buried; she said there would be a second funeral, in line with his last wishes.”

               “So sorry to hear that. So his wife speaks Jèrriais? She wrote the letter?” Jordana continued. “And what is a second funeral, if I may? Is that some kind of surviving Norman tradition in Jersey?”

               “Paul wrote two letters shortly before dying. One for his family and the other one for me. Leonor knew the contents, but she misplaced it. For a long time, she could not find it. I did tell her to forget about it and that it would eventually resurface, but she was adamant in making sure that I physically received it before we could proceed. Anyhow… he wanted to be cremated on the anniversary of our escape date, and his ashes scattered in the ten places portrayed in my photographs. Undoubtedly, he wanted me to be there!”

               “What an intense story!” Jordana exclaimed. Although she had been fairly audacious up until that point, her instinctive, overarching discretion took over, suggesting it was time to end the conversation right then and there. Then again, they could pick it up some other time, upon Mr. Peirson’s return and only if he wanted. “Well, I think perhaps, it’s best for me to go, now. I’ll leave you to your thoughts. I’m sure you want to start preparing for your trip back home. I wish you a wonderful journey and safe travels! Is this the first time you’re returning to Jersey after all these years?”

               “No. I had been back in the late seventies, for my mother’s funeral. But a lot will have changed, yet again,” he said.

               “Right, I know you’re going to a funeral, but perhaps you may retrace your photographs, this time in color,” Jordana timidly uttered. “Good-bye for now. Until we meet again,” she said.

               Before she could get up from her chair, he quickly said “I think you can take those pictures with your own eyes. How about you come along as my assistant?”

[allenmendezsr]

4 Week Diet - Supercharged Weight Loss

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4 Week Diet - Supercharged Weight Loss

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    Need To Lose Weight Fast?

“Finally, The Truth About Rapid Weight Loss Revealed.

Read on to Discover The Latest Research And Scientific Breakthroughs Which Change The Face Of Dieting Forever. I’ll Expose The Lies That You’re Being Told And Provide You With A Simple And Effective Solution…

…A 4 Week Diet Which Could Be The Easiest Way To Lose 10-20-30+ Pounds Of Body Fat In Just 4 Weeks That You’ve Ever Tried!”

And it’s guaranteed to work or you’ll get all your money back… How many other diets will give you that kind of a promise?

In fact how many other diet companies want you to succeed?

It’s true most of them rely on your ongoing payments to make the FAT profits they do each year. And this is one of the biggest reasons why up until now you’ve probably never succeeded…

And you thought it was your fault that you were overweight, but it isn’t!

They aren’t telling you the truth, you’re being lied to…

But don’t worry, I have all the answers for you right here. Once you’ve read all of this short report today, you’ll finally understand where you’ve been going wrong all this time, but more importantly you’ll learn how to put it RIGHT…

So you can finally start feeling good about yourself, I mean feel really proud of the way you look so you actually enjoy shopping or getting dressed up to go out and meeting people without feeling embarassed or self conscious about the way you look.

“This really works! The theories behind the 4 week diet really make sense and Jago has translated these in to an easy to use plan.

I love the recipe suggestions and even your shopping lists are already done for you so there’s no excuse not to get organised which Jago explains is the key.

The simple exercises are well demonstrated, they can be done easily at home to fit around your life.

I’ve used the 4 week diet a number of times for special events and holidays and it’s worked everytime to get me looking and feeling my very best.”

Sarah Reynolds

Dear friend

In this report I’m going to tell you all about the 5 biggest weight loss myths that have been stopping you from getting the body of your dreams…

Weight Loss Myth #1 – Why you’ve been lied to and tricked in to eating the wrong types of foods.

Weight Loss Myth #2 – How the way you’ve been taught to eat has actually programmed you to store fat, not burn it.

Weight Loss Myth #3 – Why eating less doesn’t always mean you’ll end up weighing less.

Weight Loss Myth #4 – How doing exercises for your tummy won’t help you to get six pack abs or even a flatter waistline.

Weight Loss Myth #5 – One of the biggest exercise myths around, that’s certain to leave you frustrated at your lack of progress.

Once you know these FACTS and a bunch of other NEW techniques I’ll tell you about, you’ll have the power to burn fat at will.

Just imagine being able to get in to tip top shape in just 4 weeks time. Being able to look your best for…

Your next holiday

A works night out

An anniversary or celebration

Your Birthday 

Do you ever stand in front of a mirror when you’re getting dressed or sometimes catch your reflection in a window and think to yourself ‘oh no, I look awful’

If you do or you just have a mild dislike for the way you look, don’t worry, YOU ARE NOT ALONE!

In fact it amazes me how many people really hate the way their body looks.

But just imagine for a moment if that was different. Imagine looking in the mirror and actually liking what you see. Imagine smiling to yourself when you turn to the side and you look just as good as you did from the front.

Don’t you think that would be an amazing feeling… wouldn’t you like that to be you?

Of course you would, who wouldn’t!

What about shopping, how great would it be to buy the clothes you liked. Fitted, shapely clothes that look good on you, instead of buying something to hide your worst bits or anything to ‘do the job.’

However you feel at the moment, YOU DO HAVE THE POWER to change the way you look and feel, but you’re probably going to have to make some changes.

But don’t worry, I’m going to explain it all to you here in plain, easy to understand English so you finally understand the facts as they stand today. Then you’ll be able to plan a way forwards and start taking control of your body again.

“I am 58 years old and over the years have tried various diets. Whilst having a modicum of success in the short term, weight has always returned.

I then discovered Jago Holmes who has led me down the path of successful weight loss. Unlike a rigid diet, Jago’s plans have taught me that diet is not enough alone and should be balanced with exercise.

I have followed the diet plan in conjunction with the exercises suggested by Jago to not only lose weight but, to maintain that loss.

Following Jago’s theory has not only helped me achieve the weight loss, but has encouraged me to think about my day to day lifestyle using stairs instead of lifts, walk to the shop for a newspaper rather than taking the car. I haven’t followed the diet religiously either, but have snack a jacks for elevenses instead of chocolate biscuits.

I certainly feel better in myself and have reaped the benefits of following Jago’s simple diet suggestions and easy to follow exercise techniques.”

Martin, UK

Unfortunately, we don’t get much of our information from reliable, impartial sources.

All too often, the way we approach dieting and losing weight is through advice and information that we’ve been told works by companies that are actually selling diet products to us.

Many of the myths around today were created by these companies.

So once and for all, I’d like to tell you the truth about why you haven’t managed to find a workable solution to rapid weight loss and to do this, I’m going to explain the facts about 5 of the biggest weight loss myths there are out there…

Weight Loss Myth #1 – Diet Foods Help You Lose Weight

This one is a real killer. Again it’s a triumph of marketing and hype over truth. Let me give you a couple of examples.

Just because a chocolate dessert or a packet of biscuits is classed as low fat, it doesn’t mean it’s actually any good for you. Yes it probably is lower in fat than its regular alternative, but it’s also full of other ingredients that are actually much worse than the fat that was in it.

Makers of these products, emphasise the lack of fat in their products but hide the fact that to make them taste better, they’ve had to replace the fat with sugars. They’ll do it cleverly, by breaking the sugars down in to various forms… sucrose, fructose, glucose syrup. Glycerine etc, the list goes on.

But the problem with sugar is that every time you eat something that has sugars in it, the body has to produce a hormone called Insulin. Insulin’s job is to remove the sugar from the blood and take it to the cells. Unfortunately when insulin is produced, it doesn’t always remove the exact right amount of sugar from the blood.

It creates a low in blood sugar levels, which then sends a signal to your brain to eat more in order to normalise blood sugar levels again.

Another problem is that we’ve been conditioned to believe that ‘diet’ foods actually help us to lose weight. You’ll have seen it yourself when someone orders a big Mac and fries, but insists on getting a diet Cola to go with it!

Most diet foods are created by huge multi-million dollar companies that want your money. They play around with and process your foods adding all kinds of rubbish just to make it appealing for you to buy, because you think it’s going to help you to lose weight.

Processed foods will never help you to lose weight, there’s too much junk inside for your body to cope with, so stay away from them as much as possible.

Weight Loss Myth #2 – Eat Just 3 Square Meals a Day

This time it’s probably your parents fault and their parents before them… You see there are a few reasons why eating at certain times throughout the day just isn’t right.

Firstly you aren’t necessarily hungry at the times that you have to eat. This means that you may be eating for the sake of it and getting more calories than you need each day.

Secondly if you can only eat at certain times throughout the day, because of your work pattern for example, then you may go for hours without being able to eat anything and this slows down your metabolic rate and encourages your body to store fat.

One of the biggest problems with eating in the traditional way is that your metabolic rate slows right down. You’ll burn calories at a snails pace because there are too long gaps between meals.

Eating smaller amounts regularly throughout the day does two things…

1.  It keeps the metabolism revving away and

2.  It stops the body from storing as many of the calories you are eating. Over a period of time, your body gets used to the regular supply of calories and realises that it doesn’t need to store as many of them as there isn’t likely to be times when it won’t get food.

Finally, it’s likely that you’re overeating if you depend on eating 3 set meals a day as the gaps between them will lead to hunger pangs and cravings. When you start getting these messages from the brain, you’ll usually eat more than you need to do.

Weight Loss Myth #3 – Reducing the Calories You Eat Makes You Lose Weight and the Fewer Calories You Eat Then the More Weight You’ll Lose

Sounds logical doesn’t it, and up to a point this is actually true BUT if this was completely right then surely the more you reduced the calories you were eating, then the faster you’d lose weight.

But this just doesn’t happen, you’ll know it yourself if you’ve ever tried restricting the amount of food you eat so low. The weight comes off pretty fast to begin with but after a few days, you can’t seem to lose any more, you quickly reach a plateau.

Here’s the real kicker, doing this means you’re actually making things worse for yourself and compounding the problem.

The reason is that your body gets thrown in to what it perceives as starvation and goes in to survival mode. When you’re in survival mode, your body just won’t release fat to burn. It can’t, in fact it does the complete opposite and actually holds on to it, by producing a hormone called Leptin.

But that’s not all, some of the other downsides you’ll notice are…

A slowdown in your metabolic rate. This is the speed at which you burn calories. You see when food intake is strictly limited, your body will always try to protect itself by holding on to its energy stores… your body fat!

Increased cravings. Your body knows it needs calories to survive and as a response your fat cells produce a hormone called Leptin which increases your cravings for guess what? You’ve guessed it… calories. Usually in the form of high sugar or high fat foods, because it’s these types of foods that will give you the biggest surge in quick fix calories.

An increase in the amount of fat you store. If your body isn’t sure when it’s next going to be fed don’t you think it’s natural to store as many calories as possible to keep your body working normally.

Think of yourself like a camel, it’s hump is almost totally pure fat to help it survive the lean times, it’s there to provide a reserve source of energy… well our bodies can be a bit like this too if we cut down on calories too much for too long, only your hump won’t be at the back!

Weight Loss Myth #4 – Think You’ll Get a Flat Stomach By Doing Sit Ups, Crunches or Some Other SECRET Exercise That No Ones Been Telling You About?

Think again, it just doesn’t work that way.

Crunches, sit ups and other tummy toning exercises are great to do, but the benefits they give you have nothing to do with getting a chiselled torso. So why does everyone think that they do?

Simple, you’ve been lied to again. Infomercials and the media, manipulate our understanding of exactly what certain exercises can really do for you.

Let me explain it this way…

Imagine that you have a fine porcelain vase, but it’s been covered in bubble wrap and brown paper. Covered this way means that you’ll never see the real beauty of the vase because it’s been hidden underneath a thick ugly layer of padding.

That’s how it is with your own tummy muscles.

You’ll never see them or flatten your tummy by doing these types of exercises alone. In fact done to extreme, they may actually lead to an increase in the size of your tummy, because the muscles can slightly increase in size, pushing the fat underneath out still further.

I’m not saying don’t do exercises for your stomach and lower back, because they help to improve posture and overall strength, just don’t expect to have a really flat stomach after religiously doing them for weeks… you’ll only be disappointed.

Weight Loss Myth #5 – Hours of Cardio Burns the Most Fat

This makes me really laugh, especially when I see ‘supposed experts’ advising you to exercise at a particular heart beat level called the weight loss zone.

The theory here is that at a certain level of effort, your body will burn more fat than carbohydrates as it’s main fuel source, but it’s only a slight difference and to get the same benefit you’d need to keep going for much longer.

Do you know how many calories you’d have to burn to lose just 1 pound of fat? Wait for it…

3500 calories!

Yes that’s right, you’d need to burn off 3500 calories in order to lose just 1 pound of fat.

OK, so how many calories can you expect to burn throughout the course of a typical gym workout for one hour, if you really push yourself?

Well it would depend on what exercises you were doing and how hard you worked, but for a typical average cardio workout, you could expect to burn around 600 calories in an hour.

Now I’m not a mathematician, but that means that to burn off 1 pound of body fat, you’d need to do at least 5 or 6 good hour long cardio workouts a week. Yeah right!… Who has that amount of time and level of commitment to do this each week?

Not me, and I actually enjoy working out.

The secret isn’t in doing endless workouts, wearing yourself out and grinding yourself down, its about gently increasing the amount of activity in your life.

Ok, so these are all the things that you shouldn’t do, now let me tell you honestly about the things you do need to do in order to lose weight fast AND keep it off.

I’ll also tell you all about a proven system that you can get hold of in less than a minute from now, so you can get started straight away the right way to lose weight fast AND keep it off.

But Before I Go Any Further, Who am I and Why Should You Listen to Me?

Please let me quickly introduce myself.

My Name is Jago Holmes CPT and I’m a personal trainer working in the UK, with over 10 years experience working with people just like you.

I’m not a celebrity trainer who touts the latest off the wall diet to shed a few pounds, you know the types of diets I mean…

…’The Cabbage soup diet,’

…’The grapefruit diet,’

…’The Maple Syrup diet,

… This weird and wacky detox or that, the list goes on…

No I’ve been successful working with everyday people who have REAL lives, real budgets and don’t have the luxury of having their meals prepared for them, they have to go shopping to buy their own food like you and me.

And over the 10 years I’ve been doing this job, I’ve personally helped hundreds, if not thousands of clients to lose weight fast.

Here’s a Brief Selection of Some of My Clients and Their Success Stories

I understand the problems that everyday men and women face… but more importantly from your point of view, I know how to fix these problems.

But before I go in to that I want to explain to you some quite startling facts about why you’ve probably never managed to lose weight before and keep it off.

And then I’ll show you how by putting all the right pieces together at the same time, you can lose incredible amounts of weight in a remarkably short amount of time.

The Truth is For Any Diet Or Weight Loss Plan to Be Effective For Both Quick AND Long Term Weight Loss, it MUST Contain These 4 Vital Elements: –

Firstly it needs to be based around a ‘proven’ eating plan that works, one that helps you to feel full but also uses the latest advances in dieting research to boost fat loss, without causing side effects like yo-yo dieting or thyroid problems. 

Secondly, it needs to address activity. Yes, I said activity, NOT exercise. The truth is that you don’t have to kill yourself to burn calories. Low intensity activities that fit in to your daily lifestyle are the new way forward and no, you don’t have to don your Lycra shorts and sweatband to become a fitness fanatic in order to succeed! 

Thirdly, it should make use of a few select products that are sold by the supplement industry. Yes there are some that are worth your money. There is more junk on sale than effective products out there, but the truth is when you cut through the hype, there are some supplements that really should be included in an effective diet and weight loss plan. 

Finally, it absolutely has to control and recondition the power of the mind to stop cravings, create inner strength and boost motivation levels. Because it’s in the mind that even the best diets can become overnight failures if the right programming hasn’t been put in place. Without fixing this part of the problem, the whole thing falls flat on its face. 

So with a diet that contains all of these elements, I guess you would really describe it as more of a weight loss system, but I prefer to use the word ‘diet’.

In a nutshell, this is what any good diet system should contain. Each one of these elements is powerful in their own right, but put them together at the same time and you’ve created rocket fuelled weight loss.

This is Why ‘Traditional Dieting’ is Dead.

Sure a good one will give you some weight loss over a few months if you can stick it out that long, but if you want a system where the fat just seems to literally melt away, day after day then this is the solution for you.

Up until now, nobody has bothered to put everything together in one place. All this information is out there and once you sift through the misinformed ramblings and outright lies, you could probably get lucky and find a workable solution for you.

But do you really want to keep trying and testing every new diet there is, desperately searching for the right solution for you?

Wouldn’t you rather just follow a ‘proven’ weight loss system that’s been designed by someone who works day in and day out with clients that want to lose weight?

Up until now, getting it right has been very hard and confusing to follow, which means most people only get average or poor results.

But Now I’ve Done It… I’ve Put Together a Complete 4 Week Diet and Weight Loss System For You…

I wanted to use all of the research, testing and trial and error, I’ve done with my own one to one clients over the last 10 years to put together a complete package which includes everything you need to get dramatic weight loss in just 4 weeks.

I’ve tested every part of this diet plan on my own clients, many times. They’ve been the Guinea pigs that have tested and improved this system that you can now have access to today, immediately in fact, if you want it.

All the dieting tips, tricks and techniques I’ve tested, tweaked and perfected are all here in one place in the ‘4 Week diet’

THIS IS A DIET THAT ACTUALLY WORKS EVERY TIME!

“The exercise plan is a really good guide if you’re not a fan of the gym, it gives you loads of different ideas for exercises to do at home, and outdoor training options.

There’s even some suggestions about exercises you can do while you’re sat at work to tone your stomach!

If you have a busy life and need some advice on how to fit exercise into your diary, this is the guide for you.   The diet plan is a great plan to help you get a healthy diet and keep it. The menus are easy to follow and you don’t have to be a great cook to make them. It also contains a whole lot of knowledge about food to help you pinpoint where the empty calories are and avoid them. 

A really good guide if you want to take control of your diet. If you take this plan on board it’ll last a lot longer than 4 weeks.”

Sue, Halifax

So Please Let Me Tell You All About My New 4 Week Diet…

To fully cover everything that you need to know to be able to lose weight at the fastest possible rate in just 4 weeks from now, for a party, special event, wedding or any celebration I have written it all in to 3 easy to follow, clearly written manuals…

Firstly there’s the Theory manual. This is vital to the whole diet. In it you’ll discover exactly how my system works. I explain the theory behind my weight loss tricks, so you know exactly what it is you’re trying to achieve and exactly how to do it.

Inside you’ll discover…

A range of preparations you need to make before you start any diet, that virtually guarantee your success and without doing these things, you’re almost sabotaging your chances of having the body of your dreams (page 11)

How to set specific goals geared towards YOU that motivate and inspire you to succeed (page 12)

Why doing this one thing every day takes you from ‘dreamer’ to ‘doer’. At last you’ll have the drive to go on to take real control of your weight. (page 16)

3 Things that you can do, which done together really fire up your body’s ability to burn fat fast. (pages 20 – 24)

A range of little known mind programming techniques that you can use to conquer cravings and comfort eating once and for all. Once you master these techniques, you’ll never be at the mercy of your emotions again! (page 26)

The ideal foods to eat and the ones you need to stay away from.

A great, tasty and quick range of snacks that you can eat all day long that will help you to burn calories, not store them (page 54)

How to read the lies manufacturers ‘legally’ print on their labelling so you understand which foods to avoid at all costs. (page 55)

Some really great tips to help you when you eat out so that you’ll still have a good time without suffering the consequences of extra weight gain.(page 57)

Everything you need to know about supplements. The truth about which ones do have an effect on your weight loss whilst others are simply a waste of your money. (page 58)

Next, There’s ‘The Diet’, Which Covers All the Meals and Foods You’ll Eat Over the Next 4 weeks.

This manual contains simple menus, shopping lists and quick snack choices in a day by day format, to ensure that you’re feeding your body the right types and amounts of foods essential for losing weight fast.

You’ll also discover…

An easier way to eat a healthy diet by choosing foods that fill you up for longer, without the addition of extra calories that also saves you time and money!   

How much you should be eating and when to eat it and also the crucial timing of changing the way you eat to boost energy levels and fat loss 

A simple but time tested way of eating which guarantees you eat a constant and regular supply of nutrients which stops you craving food at the same time as making you feel fuller.

Some great tricks to make eating healthily whilst following the ‘4 Week Diet’ child’s play that are quick and simple to do even on your busiest days! 

A range of quick and healthy food alternatives to your favourites, that give you loads of energy and make you feel fuller for longer. 

The #1 biggest mistake nearly everyone makes by NOT getting enough of this important nutrient and why doing this simple thing each day will improve the quality of your hair, your skin and energy levels 100%! 

A step by step eating system that includes shopping lists and daily menus, leaving you to eat on auto pilot, no need to worry about what you are going to eat, it has all been planned out for you in fact, it couldn’t be easier!

Last But Not Least, You’ll Also Get ‘The Exercises.’

This Manual Contains the Final Key to Rapid Weight Loss. The Missing Link in Almost Every Diet You’ve Ever Tried.

But this is no ordinary exercise plan. This is one of the easiest activity plans you’ve ever seen. You don’t need to get your Lycra shorts on and join a gym, you don’t have to spend every spare minute exercising and you don’t have to kill yourself by doing a workout that leaves you aching for days.

This activity and exercise plan is different, inside you’ll discover…

A simple but effective way to exercise at home, which takes just a few minutes to do, but that boosts fat loss and leaves you feeling energised all day long (page 9)

An easy and enjoyable way to become more active that you can do anytime (page 22)

Some great tips you can use everyday to help you catapult your weight loss to new highs that are easy to do and fit nicely in to your everyday life (page 20)

A simple but extremely effective walking plan that’ll have you losing weight and loving the feelings of accomplishment you get after each session (page 25)

An easy to follow workout you can do at home, that includes clear photos and descriptions so you know exactly what to do to tone those ‘hard to reach’ places! (pages 27 – 32)

A quick way to tighten and firm your tummy muscles which you can do at home for FREE and in less than 5 minutes a day. (page 33 – 46)

How to fit exercise in to a busy day. So easy to do, you’ll never again struggle to find the time to exercise. You’ll definitely have time to do this. (page 51)

OK Jago, So Why a Diet That Lasts Just 4 Weeks?

Well, that’s a very good question. Remember the last diet you tried, How far did you get?

A few days, a week, 10 days, 2 weeks?

One of the biggest reasons people don’t stick at diets is that there’s no completion date.

Psychologically it’s very difficult to keep doing something that you wouldn’t normally do for an indefinite period. If you know you’ve only got to do something for a short amount of time, it’s much easier to stick to AND you’ll try harder.

Another reason is that I wanted to use a time frame that didn’t just give barely noticeable results, I wanted the ‘wow’ factor and in 4 weeks, you really can achieve outstanding results… believe me, I’ve seen it so many times.

But the real beauty of my NEW improved 4 week diet is…

It won’t take over your life 

It’s quick and easy to do 

You’ll see fast results and 

There are no nasty side effects, except having to buy a whole new set of clothes! 

It’s really easy to do and very effective.

If You Follow My NEW 4 Week Diet You’ll…

Lose weight fast, so you and anyone who knows you will start seeing your body shape change before your eyes

Feel more confident about the way you look so you feel comfortable and relaxed around other people

Have tons more energy and get up and go, nothing will feel like an effort, you’ll have the energy levels of a 5 year old.

Discover a system that you can use anytime to drop weight at will

See improvements in the condition of your hair and skin

Have more zest for life, approach life with a positive attitude so you attract more of the good things in life.

Be able to buy the clothes you like, not just the ones that hide your worst bits. Shopping will no longer be a chore, you’ll love trying on new clothes.

We all have a perceived idea about dieting…

It’s got to be hard, a challenge. It’s like you have to deprive yourself, almost like punishing yourself for gaining weight.

If it’s not hard, most people don’t consider it to be a diet, but the truth is that dieting doesn’t have to be like this.

Because There’s a Way to Lose Weight Fast Without Starving Yourself or Taking Tablets or Potions That Are Harmful to Your Health…

…and it all Hinges Around Taking Control of Your Mind.

When you really think about it, it’s your mind that controls everything you do.

Once you manage to control your subconscious mind, you hold the key to not only losing weight fast, but also losing weight and controlling it forever.

And ‘The 4 Week Diet’ helps you to do just this. With the mind tricks and reprogramming techniques you’ll learn inside, you’ll finally be able to win the war of the mind.

Cravings and comfort eating will be a thing of the past.

With the information you’ll learn, you’ll find that you crave foods that actually improve your health and help you to lose weight even when you’re feeling a bit down or tired.

But the best thing is that by eating the right types of foods, you won’t have these kinds of mood swings or feelings of tiredness all the time.

You’ll find that you have so much energy, that you’ll wonder how you ever got through each day when you weren’t following ‘The 4 Week Diet’. Everything will be so much easier.

Here are some more things you’ll discover when you use my 4 Week Diet and weight loss plan…

Exactly how much food you need to eat each day WITHOUT counting calories.

Which carbs are your friends and which ones will sabotage your best weight loss efforts.

How to turn your body in to a fat burning machine that burns off your unwanted fat all day long without you having to be constantly on the go.

How to use some tricks of the mind to create the perfect weight loss mentality, so you won’t cave in to temptation at the first sign of a challenge.

Okay Jago, This Sounds Like Something That I Can Benefit From, But How Much Does the 4 Week Diet Cost?

Losing weight is always going to cost you something…

Whether it’s joining a gym at a cost of $500 – $900.00 a year, hiring your own trainer and paying at least $300.00 a month or signing up for the latest diet scam, where you’ll pay over inflated prices for your shakes or tablets etc.

Or you could start a fitness regime yourself at home and buy yourself a treadmill or cross trainer.

So, let’s just do a quick comparison. The last time I checked, the cost of buying a treadmill would set you back well over $1,000.00. And virtually everyone I know who bought one used it at first but after a few weeks simply used it to hang their clothes over. It was left to gather dust.

Or you could easily pay $75 – $100 bucks per month for a gym membership which you’ll maybe use a few times (that’s over $900.00 per year for that alone!).

Or you could hire a personal trainer like me to work with you. But at a cost of over $75.00 per session, you’d quickly run up a bill of over $300.00 a month, for only four workouts, after that you’d be on your own.

If you think of it this way, you’re actually getting hundreds of dollars worth of top quality expertise and training at your disposal inside this new program, which you get to keep forever…

You can use the techniques time and time again.

But you won’t have to pay anything like this amount or even match my minimum hourly rate of $75.00.

In fact, your total investment for this entire system is just $149.99 $75.99 $37.95.

That’s just a little over a measly dollar a day!

And how many gyms have you been to that give you a 60 day money back guarantee?

(That’s right, I’ll tell you about this in a moment.)

You’ll have everything you need and what’s more you’ll be able to start immediately. Within a few minutes from now if you like…

The best part is my NEW system is fully and unconditionally guaranteed.

100% RISK-FREE Money Back Guarantee

If you aren’t 100% satisfied that ‘The 4 Week Diet’ provides you with absolutely everything you need to know and all the tools you need to lose weight quickly over the next 4 weeks, then you can simply request a full and complete refund in the next 60 days.

I am pleased to be able to offer you a no questions asked, 60 day money back guarantee.

  And should you decide that the program isn’t right for you in any way whatsoever, then I would like you to keep all of the special bonuses which I’ve included for you below. These are worth over $119.94 and are yours for free to keep forever when you place your order.

NO QUESTIONS ASKED… no gimmicky rules or requirements. 

You don’t even need to write an explanation as to why you don’t want to keep the program or produce evidence that you’ve tried the system out, NOTHING!

Remember, I’m so confident that you’ll be delighted with this program and all of the FREE bonuses worth $119.94 that I absolutely INSIST that you send the program back to me for a full and complete refund if you don’t think it’s the right solution for you! 

All you need to do now so you can try out my system completely risk free is place your order now by clicking on the ‘Order Now!’ button below. Follow the simple instructions on screen to download the eBooks through our secure system and you’ll be able to get started in just a few minutes from now.

I promise within days of following my system you’ll be amazed at how quickly the changes will start to happen.

You can relax because you’ve found your solution… this works!

Remember, I’ve used my own experience and extensive research through real life working in the trenches knowledge I have gained with my private 1 to 1 clients over the last 10 years.

I’ve tested this out on them and perfected it before releasing it to you. This is the reason why I‘m so sure it will work for you too and I’m happy to offer such a generous, iron clad, 100% money back guarantee.

“The biggest boost for me is that I now, once again have a regular exercise plan and I am continuing to lose weight and feel better all the time” Debbie

“New Image has been very helpful and has given me lots of encouragement at all times. I am extremely pleased with the results I achieved in my body shape and general fitness”Dawn

“I started the plan with eager anticipation and a determination to succeed, and due to the encouragement and expertise I received along with a lot of hard work , I am delighted to say it has been a resounding success” Barry

Now Even Though You’ll Lose Weight Fast If You Follow My Instructions in ‘The 4 Week Diet,’ I Want to Add Even More Value to This Offer…

I don’t want you to simply be pleased about your purchase, I want you to be absolutely delighted with it!

So I know if you’re anything like me you’ll also find some of these additional FREE bonuses extremely useful: –

BONUS #1 (worth $11.99) – order now and you will also receive this eBook completely FREE – ‘Healthy Smoothies For Rapid Weight Loss’

Discover over 50 of the most mouth watering smoothies and shakes ever created. Recipes that contain some of the quickest and easy to make fat blasting, energy boosting drinks that take just a couple of minutes to make.

All the recipes have been selected because of their healthy balance as well as for the combination of flavours and textures they provide.

These smoothies are low in fat but very high in taste!

BONUS #2 (worth $17.99) – order now and you will receive this superb NEW eBook completelyFREE – ‘Healthy Soups For Healthy Living’

In this great little eBook you’ll find a range of tasty and nutritious soups which are both easy and quick to prepare… exactly what you need when time is short.

The recipes have been chosen for their taste but also for their nutritional value, the majority of the soups are low in fat and high in vitamins and minerals.

Each recipe comes complete with its own nutritional breakdown section.

BONUS #3 (worth $11.99) – order now and you’ll also receive this eBook completely FREE – ‘How To Boost Your Metabolism’

Inside you will learn how absolutely anyone can instantly boost their metabolism by making just 3 SIMPLE changes to their lifestyle.

Learn ways to burn calories even at rest and why doing some exercises will leave you feeling frustrated at your body’s ability to melt away body fat.

You’ll learn the secrets to eating more and weighing less and how some people never seem to gain weight whilst others will always have a weight problem.

BONUS #4 (worth $21.99) – order now and you will also receive this eBook completely FREE – ‘Glycemic 101 – How To Effortlessly Control Your Glycemic Index’

Inside you’ll discover exactly how to eat to support and maintain healthy blood sugar levels and how the peaks and troughs in your blood sugar can leave you craving the worst types of junk food.

You’ll learn why using the Glycemic index as your guide to choosing food could dramatically reduce your risk of suffering from diabetes, high cholesterol and heart disease.

And finally you can gain control of your weight forever, so you can choose your own dress size and maintain that shape for the rest of your life.

BONUS #5 (worth $17.99) – order now and you’ll also receive this eBook completely FREE – ‘Healthy Salads For Healthy Living’

You’ll find some really unusual and tasty salads which can be used as meals in their own right or eaten alongside other foods as accompaniments.

Never again will you have to serve up limp lettuce leaves, soggy cucumber or boring tomato slices. Once you try some of these fantastic salads you’ll realise that there is much more to a salad than simply filling up a space on your plate.

There are 17 mouthwatering recipes that draw inspiration from all over the world along with some useful hints and tips for how to make the most out of any salad by using some of the healthy and tasty dressings you’ll find inside.

BONUS #6 (worth $37.99) – order now and you’ll also receive this eBook completely FREE – ‘How To Start Running’

I thought this might be a really great bonus for you. It’s one of my favourite training guides and will help you to plan, organise and start your very own running program. 

Running is a great way to lose weight and build up your fitness levels so you have more energy in everyday life. But the problem is that most people don’t know how to get started properly, so they end up giving up too soon without noticing any improvements to their fitness or seeing any weight loss benefits at all.

‘How To Start Running’ is a complete guide to running for both beginners and experienced runners. The advanced techniques and training tips you’ll learn inside will change the way you think about running forever.

Included In This Special Offer

Cost If Bought Separately

The 4 Week Diet (All 3 Manuals)

$37.95

Healthy Smoothies

$11.99

Healthy Soups For Healthy Living

$17.99

How To Boost Your Metabolism –

$11.99

Glycemic 101

$21.99

Healthy Salads For Healthy Living

$17.99

How To Start Running

$37.99

Total If Purchased Separately

$157.89

Taking Advantage Of This Special Offer You’ll Pay Just:

$79.50 $37.95

So that’s a total of over $157.89 worth of recipes, techniques and tips which are available elsewhere at the prices you see here, but all yours when you order ‘The 4 Week Diet.’

And no matter what you decide the bonuses are yours free to keep forever.

So What Makes ‘The 4 Week Diet’ Different to all the Other Diets Out There?

Well, firstly it’s been written by an ‘experienced’ practicing personal trainer. I know what works quickly and I know what works over the long term.

You’ll lose weight quickly but safely, and if you continue using the techniques and principles you’ll learn, you’ll also keep the weight off too.

Whilst this is a diet and a very big part of the system, I don’t attack the fat using only one technique, I throw everything at it, to really boost weight loss… 

I use all of the latest up to date diet tricks and supplemental breakthroughs to get remarkable results.

Why You Should Give it a Try…

It’s safe, fast, effective, easy to do and it’s guaranteed to give results. That’s right, you didn’t misread that last bit.

I stand behind my 4 week diet. If you don’t see amazing results after following my advice, I’ll give you back every cent.

And it’s very easy to get a refund, if it doesn’t work for you, simply send me an email and you’ll get all your money back.

How many diet clubs, magazines or personal trainers etc will offer you that sort of a guarantee?

You may think I must really believe in this system to offer this sort of guarantee… well I do.

I KNOW IT WORKS!

Every single time anyone has followed this step by step system fully, they have seen dramatic results.

In fact not only will I give you a full refund, but I’ll also give you 6 weeks to try it out.

Oh, and just in case you’re wondering if you’d ever get your money back, as well as my own 60 day money back guarantee, you also get Clickbanks 60 day Guarantee. Clickbank is the secure payment processor we use, and they have a very strict policy for their authors.

We have to stick by their rules or we get kicked out!

So it’s your decision, you have absolutely nothing to lose. I guarantee you’ll lose weight fast and see rapid changes in your body shape.

But perhaps more importantly…

You’ll learn the right way to eat, so you can lose weight whenever you choose. If you’ve got a birthday, a holiday, anniversary, new job on the horizon… for any reason you like.

You’ll discover which foods help you to lose fat and which ones cause you to store fat, so you can stop banging your head against a brick wall, you’ll know the solution.

You’ll finally see why you’ve been getting it wrong all these years and why the lies and untruths you’ve been told have been keeping you from EVER being the shape you want to be.

But all this can change right now. Once you place your order below and download your copy of my NEW 4 Week weight loss plan, you’ll have instant access to the eBooks so you can get started right away!

I really hope you decide to give it a try. After all you’ve got nothing to lose with this offer and EVERYTHING to gain.

Yours Sincerely,

  Jago Holmes, CPT 

Author, ‘The 4 Week Diet’ 

Well it’s over to you, the decision is yours now…

I’ve taken away any risk you might feel about trying out my 4 week diet by offering such a RISK FREE money back guarantee.

All this information can be yours immediately for just $37.95. Simply click below to order and you’ll be taken to our secure payment page. From there, just follow the on screen instructions to download your own copy of these superb eBooks.

P.S.  Please remember there is absolutely NO RISK at all for you to try my 4 Week diet. If you aren’t thrilled with the information you find inside the program and don’t notice the changes you expect during the next 4 weeks after following my advice, then simply email me at the address you’ll find on my ‘contact us’ page at the bottom of the page and I will refund your order.

Your satisfaction is 100% guaranteed, my system has been used by hundreds of my own clients and it works, and I guarantee it will work for you too! 

P.P.S.  Remember by ordering “The 4 Week Diet,’ you’re not just getting the Complete weight loss system, but you’ll also receive at no extra cost whatsoever all of the bonuses worth $119.94 TOTALLY FREE which also contain vital information to help keep you motivated.

P.P.P.S.  There is just one small catch to this offer, I have put this package together and included all these extra bonuses which are for sale elsewhere at the prices you’ve seen, but I’m not sure how long I’m going to offer these extra bonuses for FREE with this deal.

You need to act straight away to guarantee that you will receive the additional bonuses for this package, so place your order now and then you won’t miss out on this great bonus package deal!

PLEASE NOTE: ‘The 4 Week Diet’ is a downloadable eBook package. No physical products will be shipped. You’ll have immediate access to download the eBooks to your own computer once you’ve placed your order.

[the-real-xmonster]

Jump Scoring, How Does It Work?

Gang, I hope you guys are still interested in tech talks because I’ve gone and made another one here. This one will focus on jump scoring and (hopefully) help you tell the good jumps from the not-so-good ones and understand why this one jump for example is worth a full +3.00 in GOE:

As I’ve mentioned a couple of times in the previous posts, there are three parts to the score of any technical element in figure skating: the base value (BV), the grade of execution (GOE) and the scale of value (SOV). BV is about how difficult the element is, GOE is about how well it’s done, and SOV brings BV and GOE together to make sure GOE is somewhat proportionate to BV (I say somewhat because I still can’t for the life of me figure out the exact math behind how the ISU defines SOV). So that is also how I will approach this explanation: by discussing how a jump gets its base value and how it gets awarded GOE.

First up, let’s talk base value. A jump’s BV is defined by, one, what type of jump it is, and two, how many rotations it has. The hierarchy of jump type goes like this, from lowest to highest BV: toe loop - Salchow - loop - flip - Lutz - Axel, and of course, the more rotations a jump has, the higher its BV is. 

It follows that the first part of determining a jump’s base value is making sure it is exactly what it’s intended to be. The 2 jumps that get mixed up the most are, as you might already know, flip and Lutz. They are both jumps in which the skater takes off with a toe-pick assist and rotates in the opposite direction of the toe pick. The key distinction between these two jumps is that flip must be taken off from an inside edge and Lutz, an outside edge. The ISU will knock off 30% of a flip or Lutz’s base value if it’s taken off from the wrong edge. 

Here’s what a flip taken off from an outside edge, commonly known as a lip, looks like:

Notice how Yuzuru was going through the motion of setting up a flip (short entry, jump done immediately following a turn), but at the last moment before the takeoff, his left foot switched to an outside edge? Now you can compare that against this correct flip from Patrick and check out the difference in their takeoff edges:

By the way, before you fret, there’s no need to worry for Yuzu. He managed to fix his lip problem and edge calls all but disappeared from his score sheets from the 2014-2015 season onward.

Here’s what a Lutz taken off from an inside edge, or a flutz, looks like:

You see Javier’s flutz is almost a mirror image of Yuzu’s lip up there: he was going through the motion of a Lutz (longer entry, left shoulder leaning outward), but at the last moment his edge switched to inside. This time I will call on Boyang to demonstrate a technically perfect Lutz as benchmark:

The Lutz, by virtue of its outside takeoff edge, is a counter-rotated jump, since its takeoff edge pushes the skater’s shoulder and upper body in the direction opposite to the jump’s rotation. Therefore, most skaters’ natural instinct is to, at the last moment, get out of that counter-rotation spot by switching back to an inside edge or flat edge, just like what Javi did. However, notice how Boyang actually deepened his outside edge right before the takeoff? That is a sign of strong Lutz jumpers.

The next step in determining a jump’s base value is counting its number of rotations. There are 2 cases which can happen that would make a jump end up with fewer rotations than what it’s intended to be.

Case number one is under-rotation. It’s what happens when a skater lands on the ice in the middle of their jump’s last rotation (mostly due to lack of height and/or distance). In practice, it means you’ll see the skater lands slightly forward (reminder: all jumps are supposed to be landed backward). Serious under-rotation (in which a jump lacks more than ½ revolution) most likely will result in the skater losing their balance and end in a fall or a hand down. Less severe cases (jumps missing ¼ to ½ revolution), usually lead to the skater’s landing blade drawing a hook shape on the ice instead of a smooth curve. ISU rule is to deduct 30% off a jump’s BV if it’s under-rotated by less than ½ revolution and to downgrade a jump if the under-rotation is of more than ½ revolution. A downgraded jump will be assigned the BV of the same jump type but with one fewer rotation, e.g. a downgraded quad toe will have the BV of a triple toe.

See below a comparison between 2 quad Salchows by Kevin and Patrick, one under-rotated and the other fully rotated. Can you tell the difference?

Here’s a close up of their landings:

Case number two is pre-rotation, aka cheated takeoff. This one is what happens when a skater does part of their jump’s first rotation on the ice instead of in the air. In practice, it means you’ll see the skater takes off facing forward (or backward if they pre-rotate an Axel). The official ruling is that pre-rotated jumps with a visibly wrong takeoff direction must be downgraded. 

Below is a side by side of Shoma’s quad flip and Nathan’s quad flip. Spot the difference?

And a close up, in which you can see crystal clear that one of them left the ice when his body was almost entirely facing forward:

Once we’ve managed to establish a jump’s base value, the next step is to determine Grade of Execution. According to latest ISU communication, here are the bullets a jump can hit for GOE:

1. Unexpected / creative / difficult entry 2. Clear recognizable (creative, interesting, original for jump preceded by steps/movements of the Short Program) steps/free skating movements immediately preceding element 3. Varied position in the air / delay in rotation 4. Good height and distance 5. Good extension on landing / creative exit 6. Good flow from entry to exit including jump combinations / sequences 7. Effortless throughout 8. Element matched to the musical structure

A jump checking 2 out of these 8 bullets will be awarded a +1 GOE, 4 bullets will give it a +2, and 6 bullets up is a +3.

For bullet 1 and 2, let’s compare the entries of these 2 triple Axels by Yuzu and Boyang:

Boyang’s triple Axel was not at all a bad attempt: he did have steps and skating movements linking into the takeoff and he didn’t take too much time to set it up either. However Yuzu’s entry was just in a different class. First, he did the jump off a counter turn, which by itself is already a difficult element. Second, the entry curve of that turn was done clockwise, which was opposite the direction of the jump’s rotation and added another layer of difficulty. Finally, notice how Yuzu did the turn and took off for the jump on the same left foot, while Boyang had a foot switch before his takeoff? It means that Yuzu’s Axel takeoff did not have any assist from his free foot, which, again, made it exponentially more difficult.

We can then follow these 2 jumps to their exits to check for bullet 5:

Boyang’s exit is a decent one with good extension (for extension, check if the skater maintains their balance, how fast they get into the check position, and how far off the ice their free leg is) and good flow back into the program. However, again you can see quite a clear difference: Yuzu’s landing was on a much deeper outside edge, which resulted in better speed and better flow, and his high kick right after very much satisfied that “creative exit” criterion. Overall on entry and on exit, what you just saw is the gap between a jump with +3.00 GOE and one with +1.57.

Bullet 3 is an easy one to spot. The two most common variations in air position are Rippon (two arms over head) and Tano (one arm over head), as demonstrated below by Adam Rippon himself and our lady of perpetual Tano, Janny Medvedeva:

The other option for Bullet 3, delayed rotation, is very hard to find these days in either Men or Ladies’ event, mostly because it’s an incredibly tough thing to pull off. Delayed rotation is when a skater starts their jump’s rotation only when they’ve reached a certain altitude in the air, as opposed to immediately getting into rotation as soon as they leave the ice. An extreme application, of course, is this delayed single Axel we’ve been treated to all last season:

Delayed rotation basically goes against almost everything a skater usually trains for in order to perform jumps. You normally want to get into as tight an air position and to start rotating as soon as possible (without pre-rotation that is). That’s why it is nowhere near half as popular as varied air position as a mean to hit Bullet 3.  

Bullet 4, 6, and 7 usually go together. Out of the examples I’ve used so far, Boyang’s quad Lutz and Yuzu’s quad toe (which you saw at the very beginning) are both top-notch examples of bullet 4. Yuzu’s triple Axel also easily checks off all of them. 

Bullet 8 is something I can’t show in gifs so you’ve gotta go check out some videos, my friends :) Just like, I don’t know, watch Yuzu's Hope and Legacy at Worlds 2017 or something.

You’d also want to keep in mind that all the things we discussed thus far is concerning a jump or jump combination in isolation. When a program is considered as a whole, there are cases in which a jump won’t get full BV and positive GOE even if it’s technically perfect: for example, an extra jump performed outside of technical requirements or a repeated jump (say you’ve done one solo quad toe in a free skate, if you want to do another one it’s got to be in combination, otherwise it counts as a REP and will only get 70% of its BV). 

Now to wrap this up, let me just point you to this one jump combination that hits about every single bullet it can conceivably hit:

(+3.00 GOE both times)

[themadvigilantist]

dantalion - all of the following original info is from (here) and i’ll just end up making references to this (I ALREADY HAVE PAST ME and i put a small edit there but, everything else?? solid. but i mean the version of dantalion i play as??? won’t mention any of these because he does what he wants so all of this, for the most part. he should because this is a great resource if there’s just not enough lore about solomon’s lesser key demon!!eventhoitsnotofficialbutilikeit) so my commentary is [like this]

“Who is Dantalion you may well ask… and it shall be answered” (…)

Dantalion - Spirit of knowledge, empathy, passion, love, emotions/intellect, Demon of mind.

Abilities (Generally, he can teach you everything that each human in this world has thought about or known, but of course these are his main job)

He knows thoughts of all people and can change them at his will - and also can teach you how to do this (also telepathy) [time lords are perfect hosts]

He teaches all art & sciences (ya know this before, but I wanted to classify it) [time lords are perfect hosts, specifically prydonians/patrexes]

He teaches how to achieve alternative states of consciousness (OOBE, Lucid dream, higher states, past life reading, hypnosis etc.) and he can accompany you during them. [time lords are perfect hosts.]

He can help you open astral senses or knowledge of something that you want to know (but better be ready, cause your brain may take a break for a really long moment…) [time lords are perfect hosts!]

Teaches persuasion, manipulation, lies, flirt, good speeches, relations, mind control, generally all social skills. [time lords are perfect hosts!!!!!!]

He can heal/or help you with low self-esteem, negative thoughts, neuroses, depression, other coded wounds in the subconscious. [time lords are perfect hosts: missy vault scene? just eps centered around bill’s mind?]

He can suddenly put in a state of deep peace and relaxation, and show you how to do this with your mind (He also knows a word which makes your mind calming down). [time lords are perfect hosts: see episode LISTEN]

He shows similitude of any person including your person (it’s for empathy skill, when you want to more understand others or people you may like) [time lords are perfect hosts: any new who and yes, shalka is new who fight me]

He can cause love or other emotions (but remember, it’s not like someone who never knew you will love you automatically, but he/she will have more positive thoughts/attitude towards you) [this why he hates it]

Causes obsession, illusions, fear or hallucinations. [this is fun to him]

Causes lust (No, he’s not a nerd who is sitting on the armchair and reading his book with a moral look of your catholic aunt. He knows what is sex and he knows it very good) [WELL OK THEN]

Finds persons similar to themselves and causes them to unite (even if your other half is in the beyond) [time lords are perfect hosts: see the introduction of missy/danny pink arc]

Knows secrets (knowledge, but not only) and reveals secret councils. [all those secret councils??? he’ll expose if you bad.]

Can show you other aspects of your personality and makes you more charismatic/or who you want to become. [time lords are perfect hosts: that entire rose arc and no, the moment is not part of that arc. sorry! but, the moment herself said she aint rose tyler. so technically she took the form of the first incarnation of the TARDIS’ heart, second being 9th (in books she took the form of war doctor) and 3rd being idris (involuntarily)]

Causes people not paying attention to you ( so you can secretly work) [time lords are perfect hosts: the earth not knowing the doctor/timelords exist plotline...I MEAN]

Preferences (you probably saw lots of other planets/elements/zodiac assigned to him and you were wondering what’s going on - these depends really on aspects, that’s why I mentioned a few, best suited to his nature)

Zodiac - Pisces(venusian), Aquarius (saturnian) Planets - Venus/Moon, Saturn [and this is why dantalion knows venusian aikido] Elements - Water/Air (perfect harmony between the intellect and emotions) Number - 9 [he think he funny w/ that upside down 6. he aint] Quarter - North (north gate) Time - Night time/morning (generally before noon) Color - Gray, red, purple, green, (dark green or dark purple) blue, black. [can you believe that i sure didn’t know about this until i stumbled on this??? a muse meant to be OKAY!!! all those years rping and i was guessing oN A WHIM??? that demon must have told me: do me justice because !!! ] Candle color - Green, purple, generally dark shades (u can also use white) Tarot card - 9 of chalices. Stones - Pearl, emerald. King - Paimon (he’s one of his dukes) [note: formally]

Offerings Raspberries, cherries, tea, honey, whisky, classy wine, flowers - dandelions, roses (especially with passionate colors - he’s a romantic guy) nuts, your love.

Scent - Sandalwood, honeysuckle, jasmine, rose petals.

Appearance Usually shows up as a robed man with women’s and men’s faces and with the book in his right hand (sometimes replaced with a mirror). But he’s a shape-shifter, so he can take any other form. This spirit can look like a man you may personally know (or not) or even he may look like you. You can also see him as a black cloaked figure, black mist with eyes, gray cloud or floating face. He usually appears as a tall and slim man, in style of gentleman or businessman. ( I (the author) usually see him as a man dressed in dark robes with pale skin, black long hair decorated with jewels tied back and with crown) [TALL SLIM MAN ok sure]

Voice Most often dark and deep. Can also be as whispers or male and female alternating voices. Often speaks quite poetically (but he also knows nice slangs) [thanks 15.ai!Tenth Doctor. you right on the money]

Energy (how to recognize) His energy is very strong, focused and deep. You can feel the multidimensional planes of his being and it’s very characteristic. It is very penetrating, surrounding you from all sides and you may feel like your mind is a bit underwater. Generally, his energy is quite psychedelic and the effects are different. After, you may feel on high (like after good marijuana) have a headache or just feel weird. If you look closer, you will also feel great calm from his essence. [time lords are perfect hosts: the matrix]

Personality Just remember one word - COMPLEX. You will never really know how he will behave, because he’s like chameleon - he adapts to people, situations and places. For one, he will be a nice guy full of heat, and for another a dark tricky spirit. He may look cold and serious at the beginning, associated with his “knowledge aspect” (air) but he’s also very emotional spirit. He’s impulsive, determined and it’s quite easy to offend him. He has these two aspects connected (intellect/emotions) with whom empathy and healthy thinking can exist. If he behaves quite dark/annoying/arrogant that’s usually because he wants to protect himself (it was a bit like empath complex - the most openhearted and sensitive people are used by others the most) So he seeks balance and tests people. In reality, he’s a very generous spirit, patient and forgives quite quickly, but also he trusts hard and always needs control (he must see everything).

Dantalion is a spirit who is focused on human bonds, so you may see him talking about ethics/morals or knowledge which opens people to the truth about their nature - that people are the same. We will always be individualists but our needs are very similar - we want to be loved, appreciated and satisfied with our actions. People may create stereotypes, hierarchy, determinants of coolness but no human will create your face and never see through your eyes.

Dandelion (sounds familiar to Dantalion, it’s not a coincidence) is a symbol of this unity. Seeds of this plant may flew away with the wind but they’re still a part of this plant with which they have formed the whole before.

Tips for working

Take it slow. This spirit can make you very obsessed (u feel these nights when you were searching the entire internet to find him and you didn’t know why?) [AHAHAme] Look through your thoughts and set your clear goal - if you want to find him try invoke him or meditate, but don’t rush. Follow your goal not obsession. Dantalion will not run away from this world.

If you want to start relationship with him, prepare for patience again. At the beginning he’s formal, cold and not very emotional. He must find a place for you and adapt. (he’s a real thinker) Show the heart, he will show it too.

Get ready for a tests - he can test your intellect or your transparency in thinking.

Speak directly. He has sense of humor, don’t worry, but sometimes he takes words a bit too literally…[he do tho]

He doesn’t like work alone. If you’re this type and you prefer sit and wait when the spirit will end all his work, this may take a long time (except when these aren’t big things, then no problemo) Otherwise, He may start to make sure you’re still planning to pay him, and everything will be slower. (He non stop must watch what’s going on)

He usually works quick but he sometimes has a several episodes when he’s a bit more limited (idk maybe he has this delegation again) and he answers for a few days. Just wait 3-4 days and if nothing happened try again.

As I said before, it’s easy to offend him. He has big ego. Know your way and know what you want but unnecessary words can cause an awkward atmosphere. Get upset, but continue anyway with determination. Let it be rational and intelligent talk.

Other asks

When you did invocation/prayer and you don’t feel his presence that doesn’t mean he wasn’t there. He usually sees everything with his eye and even he may already work with you but you don’t feel it consciously. He likes working behind the curtain.

Sometimes he acts weird and unexpected. People do strange things, your cat began to like him more than you, one time he wants to talk and the other he prefers to sleep, he walks on the wall, whispers strange things and this day he prefers eat pizza than classy alcohol. Can encourage you to play. It’s just his complex nature. [yep]

He’s not a demanding spirit. Just give him something from your heart or what you think is valuable.

He’s a good guardian when it comes to safety with people.

This spirit has equal gender. Dantalion is both female and male. Here I prefer call him “he” because that was my experience and this spirit’s attitude. [time lords are perfect hosts]

Dantalion is a djinn, demon, fallen angel, dark angel - he’s everything. Name as you want. [he prefer demon/fallen angel because he was an angel]

He may look nice and with good heart but he also HATES. He really gets pissed off and can destroy your life very hard when you think you shouldn’t give him what have you promised earlier (and then there’s no empathy at all …) [time lords are perfect hosts: i did make vin his host for a time for a reason...didn’t think that i end up being true to that character......]

He’s [used to be] a very loyal boy if your work was successful. He can come back to you even after a year without contact.

His attributes/symbols are - eyes/eye, faces, crown, books, the speaker, the judge, Judge’s stuff of high social rank, scepter, psychedelic waves/smoke, dandelions, brain, mask, mirror, water, clouds, the priest (absolutely not about religion but more about education and speaking to people) [EMOJIS]

[spartanburger]

Title

So I want to give a quick update on the state of the updated Quarian Civilian model I’ve been slowly working on over the last few months.  I’ve had a few heavy weeks at work that have taken precedent, and I’m only now getting back into a normal routine, but it is coming along steadily.

Right now, I’m still adding the hood flexes.  I would say I’m somewhere between a third and a half of the way done with them.  My process for doing them has sped up quite a bit lately, so it shouldn’t take too much longer.

Anyway, here’s one of the issues I’m running into:  Adding a shapekey to flex the hood on one side is easy enough.  The issue is getting a mirrored shape key on the other side.  For example:

Here we see the fifth left hood flex.  Now, in blender, the easiest way to mirror a shapekey is to duplicate the current shape key (”new shape from mix”) and then hit mirror shapekey.  However, this feature is programmed to have zero tolerance.  If the corresponding vertex is even a millionth of a blender-unit off, it will say the key failed to mirror. This poses an issue as, although the model appears to be symmetric, it isn’t (by very slight amounts that would otherwise be imperceptible).  About 20% of the vertexes are symmetric as well, so if I just moved the model, those would then be off.  I can’t mirror those 20% and then do the rest manual as, when the mirror is applied, any failed vertexes are left behind, so I would have more work, reversing the flexes on the old side and then applying the same flex on the new.

Right now, my process has been that, once I’ve got the main key done, move vertexes manually by putting the old and new blender-unit coordinates into a spreadsheet, and then the coordinates of the new vertexes as well, and it will automatically give me the new coordinates I need.

I then just copy the calculated coordinates into blender and the vertexes move.  I do this by vertex pair (if you look at the model, the hood has an outside and an inside. Outside vertex and corresponding inside vertex make a pair).  Generally, about 50 vertexes are moved per shape key, so this means I only have to do this 25 times per mirrored key.  I’ve gotten the process down, so it doesn’t really take me too long (relatively speaking) to get a key mirrored.

I plan on doing about 6 keys per side that pull the hood back (each at different heights along the edge of the hood), at least three that pull it forward, and 3 that pull them out horizontally, a total of 18.  So far, I’ve done five of the pull-backs, both sides, so a total of 10.

Main point is that, animating the hood being pulled back should look more realistic as you can flex the edges of the hood instead of having the hood move like plastic - something that even my new hood animation bones doesn’t solve.

As for what’s next:

1. Tiddie bones.  Merely just to be able to give some more realistic move to them.  Not meant to be sexual at all - just to make them act more like breasts rather than metal cups.  Less like robo-tits and more like hey there’s actually flesh under there ffs.  For what I want to do, any modifications here would be extremely slight. Almost imperceptible.  But hey, I always tend to add things to my work that are generally pointless and imperceptible, so why stop now?

2.  Mask armor bodygroup.  I’m gonna export that tali armor mask she uses for her From Ashes skin and put it on as a bodygroup.  Additionally, I’m gonna try and modify the mask and create different versions.  I’ve seen quite a number of amazing Quarian OC concepts with various different mask armor types, and I want to be able to add more options like that.

3.  Play around with the mask shape.  I want to see if I can make it so the entire mask can detach.  This is not likely to be successful as there simply is no face geometry back there below the upper lip.  But, I should be able to play around with different shapes for the mask itself, much like with the mask armor.  Again, this is based on numerous concepts I’ve seen that I am in love with.  I wish I could do something like this with my own OCs, but being limited to the models makes this more difficult.  Hopefully, I can add some nice variety to the model here.

4. Textures.  The normal civilian has something like 5 textures to it.  I will redo these in 4k, because anything less would be for the fucking casuals. I’ve already redone a number of civilian textures in 4k, so I have the process down already.  However, with the new helmet geometry and the mask armor, I will also have to modify those textures to fit the color schemes of the civvies.  Now, those will just be the regular textures that will go along with the model on release.  I will be creating separate textures specifically for my OCs that are slightly (or totally) different - depending on how much I redesign them.  A first pass of Eris and Vera are already done.  Related, but I already have skingroups for different mask shaders (each one has their benefits and disadvantages regarding AO, letting visual geometry pass through, and lighting).  I may remove one once I play around with them so more to confirm which one I like better.

5. SFM eyes.  I briefly tried earlier and it didn’t work, but I’ll try to add them again.  I may have to remake the eyeball geometry from scratch.  SFM eyes require half-spheres to work, and the current model has eye geometry that is a little more than half a sphere.  I intend on using the eye shader settings that Lord Aardvark used in the Bodymorph Tali model.

6.  Face Flexes.  Stuff like eyebrows, eyelids, upper cheeks and stuff like that.  Hopefully, it will be symmetrical enough to mirror shapekeys this time.  

And I think that will be it.  Compile as civilian, then compile separately as private OC model with different texture links. Then just throw it up on SFMlab or the workshop and be done with it.  Workshop may not work to well due to size limits.  4k textures are mean to harddrives.

With that done, I will be able to finish final attributes for Eris, like what I want her face model to be, modifying the bodymorph tali model to work as a nekkid model for her, working out the scale proportions and textures needed to make her at different ages (her suit changes colors), and then document everything for making her so I don’t forget where I keep her textures, or what scale proportions to use for her.

With the model done, doing all that for Vera will be easy.

Then on to the Geth trooper (needs headflaps), Male Quarian (hoodless), and porting the Turian Cabal model, since the few pieces of artwork I’ve seen of her in Source Engine are by those who are unable or unwilling to share a source.  Maybe see if I can snag a Vetra model too for the higher polygons.  

Along the way, a few other models will be ported as well.  I know I need that damn Adas ASR model so Kael can compensate himself with big guns.

Anyway, yeah. Stuff. Writing it all out helps me see what needs to be done and to focus on what’s next.

[saintgale]

Hey, if you don't mind me asking, what materials did you use to make your Starscream cosplay? My friend and I want to do a transformers cosplay and it'll be my first time working on armor-like pieces.

Hi there! :D I don’t mind at all, thank you for asking and for your interest in the costume! He’s mostly made out of craft foam (sheets of various thicknesses depending on the part of the armor–also sometimes several pieces layered on top of each other for really thick parts or to help shape things), foam board (wings), canvas, and paper (that has been layered together and sealed). The colors are done with mostly spray paint, and the detailing/wear done with silver sharpie markers.

I wish you and your friend good luck with your Transformers costumes, I’ll also include here some tips for TF cosplay in general or things throughout the process that I learned that I think might be useful? They may or may not be relevant to your interests, but just in case! ♥I hope you both have fun! And if you have any questions about anything else or need clarification on something, please feel free to ask!

(Disclaimer: I don’t claim to be an expert on this, and this certainly isn’t an end-all-be-all guide or anything like that! These are just some things I had to think about in the making and wearing phases and thought would be worth sharing! They are in no particular order, under the cut~)

1) Plan in advance–this goes from everything big and small!

For example, if you want some particular part to move/be able to move with you as you walk around, you need to draft this from the beginning. If you want a particular part to be very solid and/or used as a place to anchor stuff or as a base, same thing. You’ll want to think about each part of your costume in the long run: for example: can I go up and down stairs, or will I need to use an escalator/elevator? Will I be able to see? Will I be able to sit down? How many pieces am I able to take on/off myself, or will I need assistance getting in and out of my costume? (Think: restroom breaks, eating food, drinking water, etc.) Something you really want to consider is how heavy the entire thing is going to be, and how you are going to transport it/how the pieces can be taken apart and put back together again. To carry mine, it took two large laundry bags for all the armor pieces, a grocery-kind of plastic bag for the shoes and mask (and the wings wouldn’t fit in anything and had to be carried on their own).

I spent a lot of time trying to re-proportion the character to fit my body–I would highly recommend doing this before you start working on any physical pieces, just so that you can try to match things the way you want to fit yourself! Transformers in general have humanoid body shapes, but definitely not exactly human in their proportions–ex: really small heads, exaggerated limbs and features. Some things are going to require extra work to try to scale to something that is wearable; for example, I’m 5′4″ and weigh around 104 lbs, something that presented a bigger problem was the shoulders, since they had to be built up a lot on either side to be more accurate. Starscream’s also very thin and has a much longer torso, so trying to fit the chest plate and all the pieces between there and his waist into a human shape was also a challenge.

To try to re-scale things to fit my body, I just took some pictures of myself in a mirror (front-facing, profile view, from the back), and then washed out the image a lot (you can do this by just loading the pictures into Microsoft Word or a similar software and just upping the brightness a lot and playing with the contrast, or using a photo editing software like Photoshop), printing out pictures (or using a tablet to draw directly ontop of them is fine too), and then drawing over top of them with pencil. I also made color-coded reference sheets on Photoshop for all of the armor pieces (views from each angle, etc.) as a jumping-off point, to give a starting place and rough idea.

Give yourself plenty of time to do this if you can! From start to finish, Starscream took about 6 months, all the way from the drafting stages to the finished product. It not might take you as long (I’d never done something like this before and had generally no idea how to go about it), but I wouldn’t suggest leaving anything until the last moment! (This becomes particularly important if you want to have time to try things on/get a feel for your costume.)

I would definitely recommend that if you are going to make a mask/helmet, that you make it easy to take on and off by yourself. They can get hot/stuffy really quickly, and you want to be able to breathe and to be able to get a sense of your surroundings/check up on what’s around you! Just a quick flip up of the mask or taking it partially off and having a look around can help a ton with your spacial awareness, and also if you need to take a break to catch some fresh air.

And of course, be safe and take the necessary precautions when making your costume, including but not limited to: cutting away from yourself if you’re using something like a knife to slice up materials, not breathing in fumes from paint and glue, etc. (Speaking of glue, my costume has a variety of glues depending on what was being glued together and how: hot glue gun, rubber cement, wood glue, gorilla glue were all in there somewhere. The hot glue gun was the hero of the costume hands-down–it’s strong, it has good mass and hold all on it’s own, and it dries really quickly and sets in place so you can continue working, rather than having to wait long periods of time for the glue to dry.)

2) Create a mock-up if you can.

I’d suggest this just to get an idea for how many pieces you’ll have/how it’s all going to fit together. You can just cardboard boxes and cartons and things that were going to be recycled/thrown away, even like milk/juice boxes and stuff like that (if you can find cheap rolls of parchment paper or that throw-away stuff for spreading over tables, that can work too, and is especially helpful for bendy bits/pieces that have to curve–my costume ended up using this stuff in the final version too) and made a rough draft of the armor. You don’t need to do all the details at this point, it’s just to see what goes where and how it fits and if it works or not. Some pieces may take more work or trial-and-error than others (for Starscream, the shoulder pads were really hard to try to figure out how to balance with the rest of the costume).

The sky is the limit when picking your materials! Stuff like warbla was far too expensive for me, so again my costume is mostly made up of craft foam (lots of the armor) and foam board (wings), canvas, and that throw-away paper stuff. I again recommend a mock-up before hand so that you don’t end up wasting or messing up the actual materials you’re going to be working with, especially if you have the time and resources (stuff you’re going to throw away anyway is a really good bet, it helps keep the costs down and is easy to dispose of/recycle afterwards).

3) Practice your poses.

In the long-run, you aren’t going to be able to control what angles people take your picture from and that’s fine, but it’s nice to have a few poses in mind and an idea of how to position yourself initially regardless. You’ll want to know your costume, what angles look good, what angles don’t look so good, and how to really showcase the detail and different parts. Also it’ll help you get a sense of how mobile you are, how far you can raise your arms, if you can cross them, how much you can bend your knee, if you can bend over, etc.

This is not only useful for really bringing out your character in pictures, but knowing how much room you need for photos. You don’t want to accidentally bump into someone or create a safety hazard for the people around you.

I had one primary pose that I used when stopped for pictures, and several other poses I’d practiced for my character as go-tos, including if I had to change poses or if people wanted multiple poses. Holding one pose, especially for a long period of time or over and over again, is not such a good idea (especially in heavy armor, even moreso for this one because I was also in heels)–my knee actually nearly gave out on me the first day because of the weight and strain I was putting on it. Changing up poses every so often or cycling through might be a good idea to try to avoid over-stressing certain parts of your body.

I wasn’t able to practice my poses in full costume because of spacial restraints (even having the shoulders on made my maneuvering room very tight in front of the mirror), but was still able to get a good idea of how to pose. Even if you can practice with some key pieces of your costume, it can be very beneficial for photoshoots or for that extra wow factor when posing!

4) Get a feel for your costume before-hand.

I really can’t stress this enough, especially for safety reasons! These things can be big and bulky, and it’s hard to get a grasp for your surroundings, especially if you are wearing a mask or have lots of bits and pieces sticking out from your costume or blocking your periphery vision. Know where your blind spots are, know your general range of motion for your head, your arms, legs, etc., and how much room your costume takes up. (For example, I know I am not able to see that well to either side of myself because of the mask and the shoulder pads, and cannot see about ¼ to 1/3 of the area below me, including from my chest down to my feet, when my head is held straight in my Starscream costume. If I want to look down, I have to bend over and turn my head sideways–doing this requires pitching forward, so I have to recognize that the wing tips are going to move down and forward, and that the pointy bits in the back/my elbows could very well change position when I do this. One of the reasons knowing this is really important is because sometimes, little kids would want a photo with me, and oftentimes they would stand next to me in one of, or be walking through, my blind spots, and I didn’t want to accidentally bump into them. Also if I was using an escalator or going up and down stairs!)

Try not to make any sudden movements–this is for your safety, and for the safety of those around you. Motions which would generally be okay out of costume can cover a much larger space and swing bits of the costume that other people aren’t necessarily looking out for/going to consider/might be hard to see and avoid (ex: wings, claws, doors, horns, etc.).

Blunt the edges of any of these pointy things. Even then, you still might want to cover them or make sure extra precautions are in place. For example, I put rubber caps on the ends of the elbows of my costume even after they were blunted (there are long, slender, pointy bits that stick far out from Starscream’s elbows that kind of resemble pile-bunkers). You can use the rubber ends of coat hangars, putty, hot glue, etc. to make edges and points softer. You might be able to take stuff like this (ex: rubber caps) off for photoshoots but I really value safety over any kind of aesthetic appearance, so I left them on the whole time. Check behind/around you (slowly) when you stop and start walking, are asked for pictures, and before you pose. A lot of conventions have rules about props/costumes too that involve sharp edges or anything that could potentially cut/poke someone, so if you are planning on wearing your cosplays to events like this, check the rules and guidelines so you know how to incorporate that into making things like armor.

Re: you want to know how heavy it is–if at all possible you want to spend at least a consecutive hour in your costume before the convention/wearing it for a long period of time, walk around, try to do some basic tasks, etc. I did a “trial” like this for three consecutive days before Otakon itself, wearing the costume for about an hour each time, and walking around outside in the summer. Having on something heavy/restricting your movement or ability to walk, see, etc., may be fine for a little while, but you will want to know how it affects you and what it feels like for a long period of time. Other things to consider–are you going to be in stilts, heels, or any other sort of non-typical footwear? (I already have experience being in heels all day, am comfortable walking/standing in them, etc., but if there is any aspect of your costume similar to this, you are going to want to practice.) Are you wearing gloves/finger extensions? (Can you pick things up and hold them such as a convention badge, can you write with a pen or pencil, can you pull/push open or hold open doors? Remember to be aware of these extensions especially when pointing, waving, etc., you don’t want to poke someone in the face by accident!)

5) If possible, travel with a handler.

This person can not only help you in and out of costume, but will be invaluable for helping you get around! Your handler can guide you from place to place and give you a heads-up if you are about to collide with an obstacle or person! Even if you have practiced walking around in your costume and have a good sense of spacial awareness, you can’t control what other people around you are going to do. I had several cases where someone would try to short-cut behind me or dash really quickly by, probably way too close for comfort (conventions can be packed spaces!). Sometimes, I caught them out of the corner of my eye and could freeze/move out of their way, but sometimes I couldn’t see them coming at all, and my handler could tell me to move, and where to move to.

For this reason, among others, I recommend having callouts (or signals) with your handler. Things like “clear,” and “freeze” are quick and easy to say/hear, or if you need to, you can coordinate hand signals or something of the like for the both of you. (Just be careful if you have your own signals that you aren’t going to accidentally stab/run into someone).

Again, you want to be wary of your surroundings and the people around you. If you have large pieces sticking up on your back, out the side, etc, or any sharp/pointy bits, you need to be careful about where you are, and who and what is around you. Move slowly, give yourself space away from objects and people when at all possible, and if someone stops you for a photo at a convention or something, move out of the way of traffic/getting in the way of others. You may want to practice or have a brief discussion with your handler about how to approach situations like this, and how you are going to get around.

Be honest with yourself and with your handler about how you are feeling! If you need to take a break, if you need water or a few minutes to cool down, if you need to remove part of the costume, etc. Walking around when your skin isn’t able to breathe and your body is under stress is not a good idea.

6) Keep yourself hydrated, cool, and safe!

I also really want to stress this one for safety reasons. I got pretty hot in mine pretty fast, and the time frame shortens if walking around and the temperature/humidity is high. To prevent yourself from overheating, take breaks and allow your body to rest and cool down. There’s no shame in taking off a mask (especially if you have trouble breathing) or parts of the costume (even the whole thing, if you need to–I had to do this at various stages throughout the convention).

I would highly recommend bringing one of those portable battery-powered fans (with the soft, non-hazardous blades–you can get them for pretty cheap), especially if you are wearing a mask/helmet/something that’s covering your head. I’ve upgraded my mask so that there is a small cooling fan on the inside (I did not have this initially), which will help with keeping my face/head comfortable and with fogging up of the mask/stop it from getting too sweaty and gross.

A very nice individual I met at the convention suggested to me that investing in a zentai suit to wear underneath your costume rather than regular clothing (I was wearing leggings and a long-sleeve shirt) can help tremendously with the overheating problem, and that the suits help to pull the sweat off your body. I haven’t tried this myself yet but I feel it’s an important piece of advice to include!