#131 ways to say ´I love you´ | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

cloversnstrawberries · 17 days ago

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"eschatological hope" platonic!yandere!albert wesker & B.O.W!teen!reader [twoshot] [pt 1] ! !

masterlist !

description; You're one of many 'subjects' of a strange underground facility, one that sources their patients from survivor shelters outside of cities affected by outbreaks, specifically ones catered to children who are either orphaned or lost their parents amongst the chaos. One day, the emergency alarm begins blaring; the pre-recorded code said through the announcement system was unfamiliar.

You took it as a chance to run, to escape this hell-- it was the best opportunity you could ever ask for. Too bad it doesn't go you your way.

additional notes; hello! this definitely was just supposed to be a oneshot, but i lost hold on my self restraint and just want to really start off my resident evil writing with a bang . i really love this idea, and i'm a sucker for religious imagery and references, so :) but also, there's a scary lack of platonic!yan albert wesker... i plan to amend that in the coming weeks as i dive headfirst into this special interest on here. it's not going away. help.

also! reader is intended to be a younger teen, around ~14/15 in here, but can be interpreted as younger or older!

warnings; Child experimentation, body horror, betrayal, mentions of the apocalypse, canon-typical bloods, guts, gore, and violence, death of a child/mentioned deaths of children (not reader), child abuse, guns, general terror, non-consensual body modification (the scientists altered reader with a virus strain </3), not very yandere in this part, but oh boy will shit hit the fan in the second part, heavy religious symbolism and references (which will only get more obvious in the next part), slightly soft Albert Wesker, and there might be more that I missed! if so, please be sure to let me know!!

w/c; 7.7k (oh lord)

I was so close, you mournfully thought-- your cheek pressed to the cold tile, a guard's boot dug into the back of your skull as he put more and more pressure onto your cranium.

You were so close to make it out of here- out of here alive. You'd seen countless other... subjects, is all they saw you as; come and go from this strange, underground facility.

It always ended the same, whether or not they tried to escape.

You were a fool to think you were any different.

You'd made it the longest, survived the most tests. You were weak, muscles atrophied and dizzy from how small the portions of the meals they gave you were-- even if they could hardly be called that.

Scraps. They were just scraps, just enough to keep you alive; but just small enough to discourage this kind of stunt.

They keep you weak, keep you under their thumb until the time came to crush you down beneath it. You'd witnessed this many times-- you're not sure how many, no longer seeing a reason to keep track of the numbers.

Last you'd counted, it'd been at 38. 38 dead, either shot because they tried to escape, or...

Jamie had been a good friend to you, throughout this hell of an experience. In hushed whispers, they'd tell you stories of their life; they lived so differently from yourself, having hailed from sunny California.

You exchanged stories about the crazy weather phenomena you'd experienced, the snow storms that hit Arklay county mid-October a few years back, was traded for a story about how the highest temperature they'd suffered through was a whopping 131 degrees in the dead of summer.

But now, there was no Jamie.

There was only the thing left in their place, an awful amalgamation of... oh god, you can't even pick it apart. So many things-- eyes of a goat, five legs; two sprouting from their back like a dinosaurs spine, and one burst out of their shoulder.

Their face was near-unrecognizable, their voice no better off. You could hardly understand the words they were saying-- and they were words, you knew that much-- as they curled their hand, as crushed and mangled and deformed as it was, around your ankle.

You stood there, frozen with terror-- unknowing of what-- no, who, this was; until you caught sight of a chunk of long hair, once dyed a vibrant red atop light blonde hair-- all that was left was a faded red, their roots having grown in a good 2 or 3 inches, coming from what you assumed to the top of the thing's skull.

"Jamie?" You'd muttered, voice small and broken. You no longer tried to fight the hold on your leg, simply stared down in abject horror. You didn't notice the alarm begin to ring, nor the flashing red of the emergency lights-- the call of a code over the intercom, summoning all available personal to deal with a "Code 96".

It-- They, nodded; or it seemed like it, a jerk of what must've been their head. What came from the thing-- no, Jamie's mouth next, made your heart go from nearly beating out of your chest to terribly, deathly still, as you realize what they'd been trying to say the entire time.

"Kill... me..." they'd rasped, all semblance of their fiery but intelligent personality gone, replaced with a simple need to be put out of their misery.

You had no means to do so, but as you heard boots rushing down the echoing hallways-- making their way to the adolescent patient's barracks where they kept you all, you knew that they did.

You sunk to your knees, and you held your friend until the guards came in, one tasked with evacuating the other subjects; not wanting any to accidentally get hurt, because then that'd just be a waste of resources-- pulled you from your friend, who let out a horrifying sort of shriek.

Your hand outstretched, as they fumbled to reach out; unable to grab yours in time, you were pulled form the room just as rounds and rounds of gunshots sounded behind you. The door had barely been shut before it started, dents made in the dense metal scared you deeply-- but the bullets never did make it through the material.

Or because the experiments got to them first. The things they inject you all with, the tests and strange sets of tasks that hardly coincide with each other-- the things that somehow make nearly everyone turn into some sort of monster,

Some kept their mind, like Jamie had, and some didn’t.

You’d had an awful feeling that your time would come soon, when all the weird injections and ‘medicines’ and ‘treatments’ finally got to you.

In some ways, you’d accepted that. The fact that you’d probably never make it out, that you’d just be another lost subject. A waste of resources.

Not a living, breathing child that they stole away from a survivor’s shelter after an outbreak hit your city and you fled— and were able to do so, because you were all alone.

You had hopes and dreams— ones that would be splattered across the frigid tile floor any second now, along with your blood and brain matter.

Sometimes the guards were kind, they gave one shot right at the crown of your head— killing you instantly.

Sometimes they wanted to have a little ‘fun’ as they called it. Nobody but the guards found it fun, how they’d toy with the kids as they killed them— the scientists and ‘doctors’ found it wasteful of their time, a disgrace that they spent more time than necessary on terminating a subject.

The other kids, yourself included, found it horrifying. In the dark of night, when you all knew the cameras weren’t as heavily watched as before— the guards weren’t standing where they were supposed to in the patient barracks, you’d spread stories about how the staff were really the monsters.

You’d say that one has a second face hidden beneath her giant, fluffy blonde hair. The others kids said that one of the guards, a particularly cruel one which none of you knew the name of, secretly had a third eye— that’s why he never took off the guard gear, which most every other one did at some point, for one reason or another.

And as you lay here, feeling your nose shift as the pressure of the boot on your head increased, your face pressing harder and harder into the tile— you come to the dreadful realization that they’re going to have their ‘fun’ with you.

You hope they get in trouble with their superiors— really, you do. Because with the red emergency lights going, causing a terrible headache to form right behind your eyes— and the alarm blared, a pre-recorded voice calling over the intercom;

They shouldn’t be here, taking their sweet time with a patient that’d broken off from the rest. Honestly, you thought you could get away with it, in the chaos of them evacuating all patients; or, all patients worth saving.

Noticeably, the barracks that held the younger kids, all below 6, were not evacuated. If anything, they weren’t making any move to free the poor things— the door still locked, probably.

“You know,” The guard began to say, and you recognized that voice. Oh, oh God did you recognize it.

You thought he was nicest of the bunch— he always did his best to help you. In quiet, dark corners where the cameras wouldn’t reach, he’d give you a hug to hide the way he handed you some extra food.

Sometimes you’d smuggle it back to the barracks, to distribute among the most malnourished of you all. Sometimes he’d have you eat it right then and there, to make sure you got extra nutrients.

“So you can grow big and strong,” He’d say. That implied that’d you’d make it further than a year in this hellhole.

He’d even told you his name-- his first one, not his last one; the one he was supposed to only be known as, something he really wasn’t meant to do— he called you by your name as well, your real one, not the serial code you were assigned when you got here.

“Na-than—“ You stumbled out, letting out a cry of pain as he cruelly, oh-so-cruelly, put all of his weight on the foot currently crushing your skull.

He took it off within a few seconds, not wanting you to die so quickly. It’d be a mercy, considering what the other guards tend to do with the subjects they have their sick ‘fun’ with.

“Oh shut the hell up, you fucking brat.” He sounded so cruel. This— this couldn’t be Nathan, could it? No… they’re tricking you. He had to have been replaced, this was nothing like him—!

In a split second, you felt all encompassing relief; as he lifted his foot from the back of your head— but that relief was short-lived, as he crouched down beside you and wound his fingers through your hair,

He yanked your head up, and you made a valiant, but ultimately useless, attempt to stifle the yelp from the action.

When you did let that sound out— though, much smaller than it would’ve been had you not tried, he jostled your head around.

“I really thought you’d be the one to make it. The scientists worked really hard on your virus strain, you know that?” He said that as if it was your fault— your fault for what? You couldn’t really place your finger on.

Maybe… he’s blaming you because you’d given the scientists hope that they’d succeeded? If you had succeeded, would they have stopped the operations—

Or doubled the effort? You’re leaning more towards the latter.

“s’not my fault…” You mumbled, screwing your eyes shut. You swear that they had to have replaced all the lights with brighter, more agitating ones. It hurt to be anywhere when the lights were fully on— the blaring emergency light, bright red and spinning constantly— added another layer of it.

“Open your fucking eyes when i’m talking to you!” He yelled— oh, you’d never heard Nathan yell like that. This has to be an imposter; it had to be that the higher-ups found out how kind he was being and terminated him, one way or another.

This couldn’t be him.

Against your own wishes, but along with your better judgement— you peeled open your eyes, lips wobbling as you were forced to come face to face with both the lights, and—

The imposter had taken off his helmet, letting you have a full view of his face.

It was Nathan. No doubt about it.

“I’d say I actually liked you,” He snarled, leaning closer— your back creaking and bending as he pulled your upper half up, but your lower one stayed relatively flat on the floor. “But that’d be a lie.” There was a cruel smirk playing on the corner of his lips, nothing like the kind ones he’d always give you,

You wrenched out a sob, at which he jostled you a little more to get you to “Shut up!”

By that point, you were in absolutely no position not to follow his wishes, your life quite literally placed in the palm of his hands.

He leaned closer again, and you couldn’t help but let the tears rush down your face at the sting of hurt from his words— which only worsened as he continued on.

“The bonuses that my higher-ups gave me to act all buddy-buddy with you were pretty nice, though. I guess I have you to thank for that.”

Oh.

That… makes sense— why you two were never caught. Why he could get away with it, with stealing the food, with showing you his face, telling you his name, hugging you, comforting you—

It was all a ploy,

And for what? Maybe they thought that if the subjects had something to fight for, that they’d be more determined to make it out as a success?

That wasn’t true and you knew it— Jamie had things to fight for, but they still ended up with their mutated body looking more like swiss cheese by the end of it all.

Nathan-- no, the guard, as you refuse to associate this... monster with the man who had been so kind to you, even if, realistically, you knew they were one in the same.

That it was all just an act.

That doesn't mean you have to admit it to yourself, even if you accepted the fact in some capacity.

But... regardless, the guard, clicked his tongue, looking down upon you in a way that made you want to curl up and sob. "They thought you'd make it, you know? You were reacting so well to all the tests. The virus took hold..." You couldn't stop the confused little noise, clawing its way from the back of your throat.

Surprisingly, the guard didn't reprimand or hurt you for it. His smirk only grew to a sick, sick grin. Presumably because of the obvious show of confusion on your part,

"Oh? Did you not know? They were testing a new strain, I mean-- I'm surprised it took to you of all people!" The laugh that followed was mocking and devoid of any light. Any joy that wasn't founded in the sadistic nature of this guard. "It was modified from a strain made by a couple of traitors-- It was meant for the strongest. They just gave it to you to see where that threshold for 'strong' was!"

...Ah.

A virus? That's what this all was? You didn't know what they were putting into you all, none of the other patients had a clue about what was happening besides what was obvious. You really didn't know anything about it--

But that's it? They were putting viruses into all of you? That'd definitely explain why some ended up the way they did; some mindless, some wanting nothing but violence. The ones who didn't what such things always looked as if they did, like Jamie had.

You don't feel sick though, not how Jamie had been describing how they felt as they approached their death day, completely oblivious to what was happening-- a little more lethargic than usual, yes-- but not sick. You don't feel like your bones are about to snap, about to shift and move and rearrange themselves to turn you into a monster. You're sure you would've... felt it,

Before you could make another sound-- before the guard could continue his spiel, a new round of heavy gunfire broke out nearby-- a few turns down the long corridor, you think.

Then, screams-- so many, and.. and bones cracking, flesh ripping; it didn't sound like anyone was getting shot.

It sounded like their heads were being twisted and ripped from their neck. You witnessed that once, with a particularly violent, now-terminated, subject. That's how you recognized the awful sound as the flesh of the neck tried to follow the way their head was being turned, only to be ripped-- sinew snapping as their bodies were pushed pass the limits of human capabilties.

The alarms-- no one knew what it was about, the code they were putting through the intercoms wasn't one you recognized. It wasn't one any of you recognized-- the guards seemed... panicked, for once. Not for you all, not at all; but because they had to evacuate everyone before they could save themselves.

Something told you that this wasn't a regular sort of rampage, put on by a grotesque mimicry of one of your fellow captives.

One second, the guards fingers were twisted in your hair-- yanking you, making your neck strain painfully as he forced you to look him in the face,

And the next, your hair was released and your head lolled forward; smacking your forehead right against the tile, not enough time to brace yourself at all. You heard the guard yell out a string of curses, before he stumbled-- and you mean stumbled, up; all scary calm and malice gone.

Replaced by a primal fear and terror that you know all too well. It was a little funny, seeing the primary force behind that sort of emotion experiencing it firsthand for once.

You don't see a point in picking yourself up at first, expecting you end to be swift-- for whatever was causing the apparent massacre to come charging at you, uncaring as it twisted your neck violently; just as you're sure it'd done to all the guards a few turns ahead.

But it... a few moments pass by, and nothing of the sort happens. You don't hear anything coming for you-- no horrifying creature shambling toward you on all fours, or a mass of disgusting, pulsing and gory flesh sliding across the tile to attack you.

All you hear are calm, methodical steps coming your way. A scientist, maybe-- all the guards seemed to be in a state of panic, if that one had left you in such a rush; if they leave you alone, if they don't continue their 'fun', or pull you along to continue at another time,

Then you know something is terribly, awfully wrong.

You listened carefully to the click-click-click of heeled dress shoes against the tile floor, coming closer and closer. The scientists weren't as outwardly-cruel as the guards, didn't rough you and the others kid up like they did...

But that's not to say that they cared for you, for any of you. If what the guard said was true, that you had gotten the furthest with their experiments-- then maybe the scientist would pick you up and drag you back.

Or kill you, and study your corpse to see what made your body welcome whatever virus they'd forced onto you.

At that, you made an effort to rise from your spot on the ground. Your elbows gave out the first few times you tried, adrenaline still running through your system-- but you were shaken up, and it was always harder to get up from the floor than it was from a chair or bed.

You were so tired, frail and weak-- but still better off than most. You were one of the few that actually had a chance, and you couldn't just give that up. Even if there was nothing to fight for really, you still had to get out. You don't know why-- maybe it's just in the human nature to want to continue on despite it all.

To survive anything, no real reason behind it. Simply a primal part of you, left over from centuries past; one that not even the most disciplined could stamp down, you think.

When you did get purchase, able to push yourself up to sit on your folded legs-- biting the inside of your cheek to smother the strange sort of chirp that desperately wished to escape you.

That'd been happening recently-- producing strange noises like that of a bird, especially when in distress. You'd been able to cover them up with a cough, or stifle them either mostly or completely, but the more scared you were; the harder it became to hide them.

You managed, though-- the fear of being noticed by whoever those eerily calm, unbothered steps that was a stark contrast to the bloodbath they were certainly just waltzing right through.

One sitting, you did your best to rise from the position-- unable to get to enough leverage to rise just as you were without collapsing to the ground, you got one leg out from under yourself-- though not without great difficulty.

Just as you were about to heft yourself up into a kneeling position, sure that you'd be able to stand from there-- you heard the footsteps come to an abrupt stop; you hadn't noticed how close they were until they went silent.

Slowly, you raised your head. The dread and barely contained panic keeping you from focusing on the throbbing, world-ending headache that kicked up a notch as you looked straight on at the lights--

In front of you, down near the hallway; but not nearly far enough for your own liking, was a man you'd never seen before. Dressed in all black, he looked more like an FBI or undercover agent you'd see in a movie than anything.

Was he here to save you? You dazedly thought, but as you looked into the mans face-- his eyes hidden by simple black sunglasses, something told you that you had to run.

This man wasn't like the others-- his presence felt suffocating, like his existence alone could choke the life out from you.

Despite the headache, the aches and pain-- and the way that, deep down, you knew that you could never outrun this man... or whatever he was; that even if you were perfectly healthy, in the best shape possible, you never stood a chance, you still tried to run.

You stood abruptly, the pressure in your head becoming almost unbearable as black clouded your vision-- as disoriented and dizzy as you were, you're surprised you didn't fall right to the floor like a discarded ragdoll upon standing.

When your vision finally cleared, you met the mans gaze, and really got a look at him. The light casted behind him made him look like he had a halo-- a halo of red, like a sun delivering sailors an ill omen, bounced off of his perfectly gelled blond hair. His face was sharp, and he looked like he was in better shape than some of the guards here.

Upon closer inspection, he seemed to be wearing tactical gear-- and when you looked a little longer, realized that the strange spots of... something, wasn't a bad dye job of the fabric.

It was blood, mostly centralized to his black leather gloves, coagulated but still beading up-- one big glob fell to the floor, as the man simply stood there. Watching, waiting-- like a cat would to a mouse, staring it down and waiting for it to turn its back.

Cat's were stealth predators, more focused catching their prey off-guard rather than over powering it with sheer brute force. You're sure the man could do that-- and the reality of it all came crashing down.

He must be the one who killed the guards, the one that caused the one tormenting you to run for the hills like his life depended on it,

because it did, and yours did too.

He said nothing, as he stood there. He tilted his head, his face unreadable-- the glasses weren't helping. Slowly, as steadily as you could manage, you took a few steps back.

And then a few more, not daring to turn around until the very last minute. When he took a step forward, you turned and bolted down the hall.

You don't know where the exit is-- or, really the elevator. Or stairs-- anything to get you out from this underground hell. You stumbled as you ran, twisting and turning through the corridors; your lungs burning, head pounding and body aching--

But you never stopped running, and you wouldn't until you were safe, or you simply keeled over right then and there. You wouldn't stop running, wouldn't stop this fruitless fight until your very heart gave out--

Or you joined the number of casualties, head twisted off. You'd yet to see any bodies, any blood or gore-- or anyone else. Most of them were in the other side of the building, and you dashed toward the section with the labs and testing rooms.

There, you think you could find a weapon, or at the very least a weapon to brandish. A weapon that would do nothing, and you were well aware it would do nothing.

The man that had stood before you, the one that set off your fight-or-flight instincts like never before, couldn't have been human. He just couldn't have been. If he had been the ones to cause those terrible noises of sinew snapping and viscera splashing on the sterile, once white walls...

Then that was that, he wasn't human. You don't know what exactly he'd be, and you don't want to find out.

For one foolish, silly second-- you assumed you'd shook him off your proverbial tail. He hadn't chased after you, and even if you were malnourished and frail, you still could run fast in necessary. Could push yourself if it meant a chance for freedom, to see the sun again-- even if it'd be the last time.

it'd hurt, you think. The other patients would complain that the barracks lighting was becoming too dim, but to you-- it was always just bit too bright. What might've been bearable the day before, became uncomfortably bright the next. Not blinding like the corridor's lights were, though. And for that, you'd been thankful.

You weren't familiar with this facility-- you were aiming for the labs, but somehow wound up in going in a circle; now facing the other way, close to where you'd started.

Bodies-- all over the ground, mostly guards... a few scientists, their white coats weren't all stained-- some were a stark white against the viscera covering the hallway.

Ahead of you, the click-click-click of heeled dress shoes called your attention, and at the end of the hallway, stood the man.

It was as if he knew you'd wind up back here, like he knew how inexperienced you were in the layout of this place-- like he knew the layout himself. A smirk played at his lips, showcasing rather sharp canines. The kind that could easily tear flesh from bone with no issue.

Maybe... he was an angel of death, you surmised. It fit, it really did-- maybe that's why he made it through the hail of bullets the slain guards around you had sent his way. How he'd been able to kill them so quickly, without so much as a scratch on his person.

The need to run didn't fade, if anything it got worse-- maybe because you knew, wholly and entirely, that you can't run. Not really. If he wanted you dead, then it'd be so. He'd taken down so many trained guards, a measly, terrified child wouldn't be a problem at all.

All you can think of that could stop him, was morals. You don't think he has those-- with the sight surrounding you.

This time, when he stepped forward, you didn't make any move to take a step back. It was useless. this was all so useless. Why you? Why did it have to be you? The shelter hadn't been ideal, but it was better than this.

You sunk to the ground, tears welling in your eyes as you looked down-- trying to look away from the still-going emergency lights, the too-bright fluorescents that hung above were still on. The combination of the two made it feel like someone was tenderizing your brain with a sledgehammer constantly.

The clicks of his shoes aren't as sharp sometimes, when he steps in the puddles of blood-- they get closer, and closer... until he stands before you, only his shoes and part of his legs were visible to you.

You kept your head down, not wishing to look at your end. You want to die under the illusion that you ever had any choice in your life. That you chose your own end, and it was not brought upon you by this... angel of death.

And as you sat there, expecting the pain-- or simply a pinch before your entire world went black; shivering from both fear and the cold of the hallway, bile rising in your throat and your headache refusing to back down even a smidge; you imagine a world were you got to live a little longer.

Because, in your mind, you died the moment you entered this facility; it was a death sentence, and you should've been able to come to terms with that. It was stupid, you felt stupid for thinking you were any different to countless other kids that'd died in these halls-- some going down with a fight, others begging for their end;

"Look at me." A deep, almost... British, but not quite-- voice spoke, clear and concise. The man sounded... oddly human. You'd expected maybe a reverb of sorts, or the voice to crawl into the crevices of your brain and dig their claws in...

He was still scary, his voice sending a flash of terror through your body-- but in a way no different than the scientists were. It was a very human type of fear that his voice incited, the fear of somebody in a position of power above you.

Oh, how badly you wished to stay staring at the ground-- it was the lights, that was the problem. The man scared you, but you knew you should obey him. Maybe he'd give you a chance then.

Oddly enough, he seemed quite... patient, all things considered. he stood there for maybe a minute or so, before repeating himself. In the same tone, the same exact cadence and words.

"Look at me." He said, and something inexplicable-- something that felt rooted in your very soul, tugged at your mind. Telling you that he wouldn't be so kind if you made him ask again.

And you do, trying to keep your eyes open despite the pain that followed. Nausea rolled through you, both from the smell of blood and flesh-- it was sharp, much more noticeable then you think it should be; as if it's being held right in front of your nose-- and from how the headache worsened.

The smirk he had when he'd first spotted you had dropped, his face now a cold mask of... something. He really did look like an angel-- but the sorts found in older religious texts. neither good nor bad, simply carrying out God's will, who in of Themselves, was a contradiction.

The man reached out, and you couldn't help but jerk your head back-- he said nothing of it. In fact, you could've sworn the corners of his lips were giving way to a little smile, not just a smirk-- but it was gone before you could really register it;

But, he continued to reach out, and you stayed stock still, not wanting to test his patience again. You were already on thin ice, probably. For running from him, for making him repeat himself-- maybe he'd give you mercy, though? Because you were so young?

You weren't exactly a child, but you weren't an adult. Maybe... maybe he'd leave you be. He didn't seem to be hurting you, and when he curled his hand around your chin to push your head up just a bit more-- he was... gentle with it. In a way you hadn't experienced in so, so long from any adult.

Even Nathan hadn't been entirely soft with his movements, too used to being rough with it all; not knowing his strength, or the fragility of a subject who'd been here as long as you had.

You're surprised you were still able to run as much as you did.

The man hummed, turning your head just a tad to the left-- then gently guiding it to turn the other way. Like he was a museum curator appraising a priceless artifact.

When he turned your head to face him straight-on, you winced; the headache reaching an all time high, making you feel as if you were going to pass out form the pain at any given moment.

"Does the light bother you?" He asked, and you tried to nod-- but his grip, as gentle as it was, was all too firm. Not enough slack to complete the gesture. "Use your words." He said next, no irritation obvious in his tone.

But still, it set you on edge. How calm he was. People weren't calm like that-- but maybe angels were. That's what he had to be. He couldn't be human... he just couldn't be.

But... why would he ask that? It's not like the man cared for your well-being, right? it doesn't seem so, the question asked with an almost clinical sort of edge. Like the scientists had when they asked if there were any major concerns with your health, if you'd felt any negative side effects.

Not out of care for your person, but care for what you represented; a subject, something to test on to try and further whatever agenda or project they're assigned to.

"...Yes sir." You croaked out, shaking-- tacking on the honorific should help, yeah? The scientists always made you refer to them as such-- Sir or Ma'am, not accepting anything else. Not accepting no personal address either; that's how you get locked up in solitary for a few hours, to 'learn your lesson about disrespect'.

You were better at it than most, only being placed in solitary twice for the reason of 'disrespecting the scientists' with the lack of it.

The chuckle that followed terrified you, making your entire body lock up-- muscles pulled taut, ready to snap. Spine straight, much like a rabbit ready to bolt;

"Good to know you have manners. That'll make things easier." Your anxiety only worsened-- make what easier? What was he going to do, and how hell was your manners going the help that process?

Finally, he released your chin-- and not a moment too soon. You slumped, not from relief, but from the bone-deep exhaustion plaguing you after everything. Head lolling forward to try and avoid the bright light, you don't know how you're still even vaguely upright-- hell, how you're even still awake. You probably burned off more calories than you've collectively taken in since arriving here.

The world was spinning around you, and that notified you that you consciousness was probably something very, very short-lived. You're sure that, if you do pass out before he does whatever he does; you won't wake up again.

He says something, but the world if muffled around you-- blood rushing in your ears, making it sound like everything was underwater. You came to when he snapped his fingers in your face, it was a warning just as much as it was call for your attention.

You looked up-- or made the move to, only for him to place his hand atop your head, and gently direct you to keep your gaze down. "You'll damage your eyesight. Close them, if that helps any."

He framed it like he was offering it, offering advice-- you shut your eyes, seeing it as what it was. You had no choice in it. Whatever use he wanted you for, he didn't want your vision to be damaged for it.

You don't think the lights would damage your sight-- more just give a pounding migraine, but you do as he says regardless; he could very well just crush your skull in his hand, right then and there-- if he took down so many guards as you think he had.

For once, some higher being smiled upon you; and he moved his hand from your head, and while he was still as close as before, it was a massive weight lifted from your shoulders, not to have him making any direct contact anymore.

"I won't repeat myself again," He started off with, and you tried to show that you were listening-- he stayed quiet afterward, and you realized with a jolt, what he wanted. As soon as you realized, you aid-- almost robotically, "I understand, sir."

A few seconds passed, a heavy weight forming in your heart-- was that not what he wanted? You were tempted to open your eyes to try and see if you could get a read on his face, figure out what he was thinking; if he was about to kill you for some perceived slight.

...But would an angel do that? Even one who killed all these people? If you were still alive, then maybe he was ordered not to kill you. Or, more realistically, not specifically ordered to kill you.

Even if he wasn't an angel of death, if he was just some terrifying super-human or something of the like, he has to work under someone; right? He also said he's got a use for you.

You just hope that you picked up on the implications that he needed you alive for that use.

"Good." The man-- Angel?-- replied, as you hear fabric shifting-- the man moving, whether that be shifting on his feet or reaching into a pocket, you have no idea. "What's your serial code?"

"...I don't know it, sir." You shook-- you really didn't. Well, you didn't remember it off the top of your head, so maybe, if you explained yourself, he'd be more kind... "But if I hear it, then I'll know it's mine."

That can't be of much help. You might've just doomed yourself even worse, tacking on something like that- did he think you were wasting his time? Were you why he'd come here in the first place? That can't be it, you were never that important--

"Would you happen to be Subject 082202?" He asked-- and you recognized the number. Was he really after you? That's... that could go either one way or the either. Hope bloomed in your chest, before smothered by absolute despair.

What did he want with you?

You tried to respond, you really did-- but your voice failed you, wobbling and tried not to cry. You nodded, hoping he'd give you some leniency with it.

Surprisingly, he let it go. Didn't even comment on it-- when he spoke next, he sounded so... not happy, but--

Victorious, you think it'd be. Smug would be your next choice, the emotion in his voice was hard to pinpoint. It was barely there, but without anything else to witness or analyze-- you were stuck with trying to dissect his tone.

"Good, that's good." You heard him shift again-- the sound his shoes made against the tile suggested that he'd crouched down, and and his heavy leather coat shifted, but in what way you couldn't be sure--

More noises, ones that were meant to be quiet-- you weren't supposed to be able to pick on them, but you could. Maybe it was the fear of it all.

Then, his hand was back on your chin. Reflexively, you flinched; but he didn't reprimand you, if anything, his tone suggested that he... cared,

Maybe not for you-- probably for whatever you could do for him, but it was care regardless, and he told you "Stay still."

You did, and felt something place onto your face-- it felt like metal, warmed by a human's natural heat; it felt like a pair of glasses, the arms tucked above your ears, the metal bridge of it resting against your nose--

"Open your eyes, tell me if it's any better." The man said with a firmness that reminded you of the scientists-- or the guards. A strange mix between the two; maybe more like a cop, if you think about it hard enough. A sense of authority, firm but not demanding.

You do so-- the headache is still there, it'd gotten better when your eyes were closed. You find that, when you open your eyes, the world is a little dimmer; the headache doesn't spike as you'd expected due to it.

As you look up at the man, you realize that he doesn't have sunglasses on now-- giving you full view of his...

Yeah. The confirms it; he is absolutely not human. His eyes looked like a snakes, maybe more like a dragons; red with yellow around his slitted pupils-- instead of scaring you as it absolutely should,

It.. comforted you. Against your will, mind you-- a little bit of tension easing out of your form at the sight of them. You don't know why. It should terrify you, it should make you want to run for the hills, like he had when he first showed up--

With his eyes no longer obscured, and your headache a little dimmer, you think that you'd have a better chance at reading the emotions on his face--

He cleared his throat, bringing you back to the present-- to his question he'd had with his earlier command. You try not to test your luck, now able to give out a short, soft "Yes sir."

His hand released your chin again, and with all the energy left in you-- you tried your best not to have your head fall forward from exhaustion, from the loss of the support of his hand. he huffed, shifting a bit-- he was crouching, but no longer leaning in close, leaving you with a little bit of a personal bubble.

A sort of privilege you haven't been afforded in a long, long while. Nobody crowding in your space-- nobody poking and prodding. Just letting you exist. Simply letting you sit there, without anyone breathing down your neck-- unrestrained, able to leave (if you weren't so banged up-- and honest-to-god terrified of the man, but that's neither here nor there) if desired.

You notice now, that there is a suitcase set down by his side-- looking rather innocent. A simple brown leather one, no obvious tells of what could be inside. It looked like one of the head scientists own bag, one you always saw him carrying around. Not trusting to leave it in one place without him present, you'd guessed.

"You're the subject for the Ammit Strain, aren't you?" He asked-- he seemed to already be sure of himself, and it left you confused as to why he's asking you. Because you don't have a solid answer for him-- and that shouldn't have been expected of you to have one.

"Uhm... I-I'm not sure. I don't... know what that is." You half expect his calm, strangely patient, demeanor to change in the blink of an eye-- for his hand to shoot out and grab your neck, and twist until your world went dark. It was irrational (probably), because he said he needs you for something. Even if you don't know what it is, you're pretty sure he needs you alive for it--

it's still up in the air, though. So you don't rely on that assumption for comfort too much.

Instead of that, instead of any violent outburst or sudden shift in his approach-- he seemed to... smile a little at your response. it was small, barely noticeable unless you'd been staring at him for god knows how long--

and, oh boy, have you been staring at him. analyzing him, trying to make sense of it all. as you do, when you're stuck in a strange and scary situation such as this.

"That's alright." He leaned forward, hang outstretched-- it landed on your shoulder, in a strange... friendly sort of gesture. Like a teacher would do as they praise you for an A+ on an assignment. "I know you are."

Then why did you ask? a bold part of you made you want to say-- one you thought had been stomped down a long time ago. During your second stay in solitary, where they kept you in for 6 hours rather than the measly 45 minutes you'd been in there the first go-around.

You kept quiet, hoping that he'd give a bit of an explanation as to-- anything. But you know he probably won't, not without prompting; even then, he might be more inclined to telling you to shut up or dancing around the question then give a truthful answer-- or one at all, for that matter.

He didn't do anything of the sort, the conversation going dead as he stood-- He grabbed the briefcase from beside him, but didn't make any move to turn around.

As he looked down at you, you realized he probably wanted you to stand as well. Torn between telling him that you aren't sure you could do so, and staying quiet as to try and minimize any possible anger-- you simply sat there, unmoving. Terrified, feeling like you'd found yourself right in a damned-if-i-do, damned-if-i-don't sort of situation.

A few moments later, he seemed to realize what your silence, what your immobility signified. He walked around you, standing behind you-- and gave no warning as he leaned down and put his hands under your armpits-- pulling you that way, before maneuvering you in such a way where he could pick you up into a princess carry from there.

Out of pure reflex, you threw your arms above his shoulders-- scared of tumbling over and out of his hold. By the time you realize what you'd done, you were too scared-stiff you amend it.

He... didn't seem to mind it much, though.

The hand held underneath your knee carried the briefcase, the handle digging into your thin grey sweatpants just a tad-- not too uncomfortable, but not ideal. Like hell you were going to say anything about it, though.

As he began to walk, he suddenly asked "What's your name?"

Despite the fear, a slip in your judgement made you let out a little "huh?"

He huffed, his smile growing wider for just a second-- starting to resemble an actual one, before reverting back to the small, almost non-existent smirk he'd had before. "Your name. None of the documents said it, only referred to you as your serial number or the strain."

"Oh." This was so confusing-- he kept walking, letting you two lapse into silence; he wasn't rushing your answer, quite the opposite. He seemed to be letting you... take your time, even if it was such a simple and easy request.

Then, quietly, you said it. Almost as if you were afraid that the scientists or guards would hear, and punish you for it-- it was their way of isolating you from the outside world, telling you to forget who you were before you'd come here.

That you had no other name, nothing else to be called, besides Subject 082202.

The man heard you, though. He hummed in acknowledgement, and in a moment of reckless, almost moronic, bravery-- you ventured to ask,

"What's your name?"

Almost immediately, he answered with "Albert Wesker, but you'd do good not to use it." The name... was familiar, set off even more alarm bells than the man had before you learned of his name.

"...So just keep calling you sir?" What were you doing? Why were you doing this? How stupid were you, to push him like this--

"That's what was implied, isn't it?" He responded, the little edge painting his tone let you know that his patience must've been running thin. You shut up, smothering what you'd wanted to say--I was just making sure.

Something like that would definitely be categorized as disrespect-- to a normal person, and absolutely to the scientists-- which you'd defaulted to treating him as.

As he carried you, exhaustion having taken its toll on you-- your eyes slid shut, head falling forward and resting against his shoulder. Within a few seconds, you were out like a light.

#yandere albert wesker #yandere x reader #platonic yandere #yandere resident evil #resident evil #platonic yandere x reader #yandere albert wesker x reader #platonic yandere albert wesker #teen!reader #gn!reader #requests open #yandere resident evil x reader #my writing

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sylusjinwoon · 11 months ago

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{ 131 }

pillowtalk.

jinwoo sung x fem.reader

you woke up suddenly, feeling groggy as your eyes slowly began to adjust to the darkness that covers your room. only a sliver of moonlight was seen, casting a faint, pale blue glow from your open window.

and yet, your eyes could not even be bothered to bask in its beauty. instead, you divert your attention towards your beloved boyfriend, currently sleeping next to you.

the sight of him being so vulnerable made you smile. sung jinwoo had always been a messy sleeper, with his hair all mussed against the plush pillows while a trail of drool was seen against the corner of his lips. a soft giggle escapes from your parted lips as you gently wipe away at it with the corner of your blanket.

if only the hunter association could see him now, they probably would have never believed that such a powerful man could sleep so... peacefully.

jinwoo exuded none of his powers as a monarch in this peaceful moment- you catching a tiny glimpse of this snapshot of his life. no daggers or poisoned blades were clutched tightly within his hands-

he had no glowing eyes flashing purple that masks his stormy grey gaze, which were now only covered by thin lids that moved in tune to his dreams.

no, for in this moment, he was free- free to be his true self when it was just you and him.

a sudden urge to speak to him was felt bubbling against your throat, and even though jinwoo was sleeping; couldn't even hear what you were saying-

you had to get this off your chest.

"jinwoo sung... when you're with me... you don't have to act like the shadow monarch, or take on the title of the strongest in the world..."

you bask in his gentle snores, reaching out to brush back his hair before continuing.

"i just wanted to reassure you, that you have no reason to be that way around me. when you're with me, you can act silly; you can act scared and anxious... you can tell me all of your fears... and i'll still love you."

it was as though a weight had been lifted off of your shoulders when you spoke those words to him. you smile, brushing against his strong cheekbones with the back of your hand, ready to fall back asleep-

when you were suddenly gripped by jinwoo's powerful grasps. his large hand encircles your slender wrists, making you gasp in response when he pulls you towards his chest.

his hold on you was tight, with the tall hunter practically crushing you to his chest. jinwoo's voice, still hoarse from sleep, manages to murmur to you when he presses his lips against your forehead.

"i know... and for that, i love you for it."

you began to blush when he says to you.

"i remember it well... how you were with me even when i was known as the weakest hunter..."

jinwoo pulls away, his sleepy, grey eyes looking deeply into yours. "and you, my love, will be the only one who can see me when i am the most vulnerable."

"jinwoo..."

your hands cling to the front of his shirt, feeling him place a chaste kiss against your lips.

"if anyone were to try and kill me... then my enemies know that they need to use you... you could stab me in the heart, and i'd still love you."

jinwoo chuckles darkly while pressing another kiss against your lips, his words making you cry because of how deeply his devotion ran for you.

"you're my world... my better half, the light to my darkness... the other side of me."

jinwoo sighs before laying back in bed, taking you with him as he plays with your strands of hair. feeling overwhelmed with emotion, you tell him.

"i love you."

"i love you too, you adorable, mushy love of mine. now... sleep."

you heed his gentle command, seeming to slump within his arms automatically, your eyelids turning heavier as you slowly closed them. as your breathing slowly evens out, alerting him of your sleeping state, jinwoo felt greatly amused by this when he brings you closer into his embrace, placing a final kiss against your forehead in response.

perhaps he would show you that pretty diamond ring he kept tucked away inside one of his drawers, just to see you smiling and happy once more.

a.n. - happy belated birthday, jinwoo sung. this was written as a gift from me to you to let you know that you are greatly loved by me, too. mwah mwah 🥰

all stories are written by rei; reposts, translations, and plagiarism are not allowed.

#jinwoo sung x you #jinwoo sung x reader #sung jinwoo x reader #sung jinwoo x you #solo leveling x reader #jinwoo my heart and soul #i love you #🥹#.stories

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physics-of-one-piece · 2 months ago

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Physics, my love. I have a question for you. That beautiful flamingo man with the glasses and the lanky legs...

Just how wide does Donquixote Doflamingo smile?

How big is his maniacal grin? How far do his lips part when he laughs in that mischievous way? There is something about his smile that I am absolutely in love with.

Hello, Snail! ❤️❤️🫂🫂

Beautiful flamingo man with his sunglasses and lanky legs and beautiful smile. 😍🥰🦩🩷

Thank you so, so much for sending this question. It delighted me to see it. I myself always wondered just how big are those smiles, I always just guessed well about the size of his hand so 30 cm, but now I get to fully submerge into this study.

"There is sth about his smile that I am absolutely in love with." I know, right? It's such a beautiful smile. Whenever I see his smile, I just want to kiss him 🥹 right on his teeth. Give them a peck.

Okay, without further ado, let's do it.

First, we need to figure out how much height his head has. Height of head is 13% or 1/8th of the human's height. I went with the 1/8th but 13% gives a similar result literally the same one.

305/8 = 38 cm. However this is an average so we'll put it to be 40cm

Doflamingo's Head Height = 40 cm

Why do we need this? Cus we'll be working with pixels and we need to know (and we'll do it for each image cus each image is a different size) how many pixels is 1 cm and then we'll draw a line measuring the width of his smile (without the dimples factored in) and see how long in pixels that line is then convert the pixels to cm and get how big of a smile the King of Dressrosa has Spoiler, it's BIG. Ha. That's what she said.

First, we'll take this one. Straight downloaded the manga page and then sized it so it's only this panel.

Wook at him and his big smile 🥺🥺🥺 isn't he absolutely adorable?

After measuring, his face is 199 pixels height

So that means on this image 40 cm = 199 pixels

How to get how many cm is one pixel?

We go pixels/cm, so 40/199 = 0.20

So 1 pixel=0.20 cm

Now we measure out just his smile. We don’t go to the dimples. According to google, the width of the mouth is the width of your teeth. Kinda. So we’re gonna go to the corners of his lips.

122 pixels width.

Now, we do 122×0.20

Doflamingo's Smile = 24.4 cm

HOLY FUCKING SHIT. YES. THAT FITS. YES.

Let’s do it with another picture.

Handsome, handsome man. He could be telling me sth terrible but I'd be too busy being mesmerized by his smile to catch anything and just agree and say "Yeah, totally." just to keep him smiling. (I am weak.)

Okay, once more his head height it’s 199 pixels, interesting. So we stick to the 0.20 cm per pixel

Let’s measure his face width while we’re here, so you guys can tell how much of his cheeks his smile takes over.

131 pixels width for his face

Doflamingo's Face Width = 26.2 cm

113 pixels this time of his smile width, a bit of a smaller smile, but no less beautiful.

This smile is 22.6 cm.

So this smile leaves only 2 cm of no-smile on each cheek.

(swoons)

This is one of my fav smiles of his. This charming, pleasant, handsome one. It’s arrogant, but damn is it HANDSOME.

341 pixels = 40 cm

1px = 0.12 cm

200 pixels × 0.12 = 24 cm

So, I think it’s safe to say this is how far his smile stretches.

For comparison, the average human smile is 2-4 cm wide (I think)

Let’s see the one where he’s going toward Punk Hazard!

246 pixels height = 40 cm

0.16 = 1 px

144 pixels wide smile

This smile is 23.41 cm wide.

Okay so the anime team draws Doflamingo’s smiles even BIGGER than they are drawn in the manga it seems to me?

Once more, proof Toei animators are absolute simps for Doffy. They drew him beautifully.

Let's do some from the anime. Let's do this one below.

Height of head 418 px = 40 cm

Width of smile 265 px × 0.09

25.35 cm

I TOLD YOU. I TOLD YOU THE TOEI ANIMATORS DREW HIS SMILES BIGGER. TOEI ANIMATORS, I SEE YOU, AND I LOVE YOU.

Since we’re focusing on his mouth, let’s see how big it opens as in when he opens it wide.

449 px = 40 cm the same, they only change his mouth.

1px = 0.08

Width of this grin 254 px × 0.08 = 20.32

Bite gap when talking - 99 px = 8.91 cm

This is not his maximum mouth opening.

Fuck, I’m gonna - wait, I’ll go to the same first pic (this one)

104 px height for maximum mouth opening (yes I know there are others but I’ve got like 20+ pics of Doffy smiling now I am feeling overwhelmed by his smiles)

The measurements for that was 0.20=1px

104×0.20

….

20.8 cm maximum mouth opening/mouth height/open mouth height

Doffy's Maximum Mouth Opening = 20.8 cm

HAHAHAHA

What that mouth do, Doffy, what that mouth do? 😉😉😉😘

THIS MAN GIVES THE BEST ORAL I JUST KNOW I - (gets shot)

This iconic one when he asks Luffy “Gear Fourth?”

547 px = 40 cm

1 px =0.07

Width of smile 345 px = 24.15 cm

Thank you so much for the ask, Snail! ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️ There are more pics and things I did so this continues in the reblog cus I reached the pic limit 😭!

Taglist: @daydreamer-in-training @moonbaby26 (cus I think you might be interested) @ohnomyhooves

#donquixote doflamingo #doflamingo #doflamingo one piece #op doflamingo #doflamingo donquixote #op doffy #doffy #one piece #physics of one piece #asks #fanaticsnail

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abbysimsfun · 12 days ago

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Sims In Bloom: Generation 2 Pt. 131 (The Gold Medallion)

Heather and Spencer were both grateful when the antidote arrived by morning. Spencer met a local merchant near the cantina for the medicine while Heather stayed in bed to rest. Once she drank it she felt better, if still a little nauseous, but after lunch the girls decided to venture to the museum.

They set up a few dig sites and found a few relics, but when the sun got too hot, the women changed into sundresses.

Finally, the sun was so hot they gave up digging and took shelter inside the museum. Walking through different rooms to view the priceless artifacts on display, Heather stopped when her phone beeped with an incoming text.

Suri keeps talking about getting married after her Aunt Elsa's death and I think she's going to propose to me. What should I say?!?

(I know that's not what the pop up says, but if I make these canon, they can't all be the same scenario as a ring in a bag!)

Heather was surprised to learn Hazel and Suri were already thinking about marriage, and she didn't feel equipped to offer advice one way or another.

This is a big decision and you should decide this for yourself, Dandelion. Love you.

She thought her answer more than sufficient, but Hazel was clearly upset and texted back quickly.

I thought I could really rely on you for life advice, sis. If I knew what to do, I wouldn't have to ask.

Heather frowned. That definitely could have gone better.

"Hey Heather, come in here. Come look at this."

She put her phone away and found Spencer in a stone-walled room, standing before a diamond-studded gold medallion inside a glass display. A plaque on the wall revealed the medallion's inscription - found deep inside the Selvadoradian jungle decades earlier, the medallion was inscribed "A gift from Malcom A. Landgraab to Lady Victorine Goth."

Spencer chuckled. "A Lady Goth and a Landgraab? That's a wild combination."

Heather froze. "Lady Victorine Goth and Malcolm A. Landgraab? How old is this necklace?"

"They think it's from the early 20th Century," Spencer read. "Malcolm A. Landgraab was a rancher out west, and Lady Victorine Goth was Lady Ravendancer before her marriage, one of the world's most powerful spellcasters who published a book of spells. But both were married to other people and there's no evidence they ever knew each other."

"Other than this necklace," Heather mused. "I should ask Mortimer Goth about it. Maybe he knows something about them."

"Do you think it'll have something to do with the curse?"

Heather shrugged. "Hopefully there's no curse, but if there is, and it does have something to do with it, I have to know more for Ash's sake."

Despite taking the antidote, Heather still felt feverish and fatigued. They headed back to the rental so she could take a nap, and Spencer took the time to analyze some of her new artifacts.

By dinnertime, Heather was feeling peckish, so they returned to the square for a nice evening in town with the locals. Heather remembered Conrad's fear that they could run into members of Los Tigres de Selva, but she was feeling well enough to really enjoy herself and didn't want to waste the opportunity.

The night was warm, so they both dressed accordingly. On the way into the square, Spencer made an offering to the statue of Madre Cosecha, a Selvadoradian custom.

"She helped settle this place during a time of great famine," explained Spencer. "A true hero. Hopefully she can help keep us safe on our temple dig tomorrow."

Heather smiled. "We should stock up on more supplies, anyway. She would want us to protect ourselves and I don't need another spider bite."

They enjoyed arepas under the lights and chatted proudly about their kids. "Violet gets into everything, and she's got her older brothers wrapped around her grubby little fingers."

"She sounds a lot like Lavender. One minute she's sitting quietly looking through a book, and the next minute she's tearing through the bookshelf. And Ash has me convinced I could design an adventure game featuring stray pets. I even reached out to a philanthropist who loves to help game developers as a hobby named Cal Anthony, Jr. Suri actually recommended him - he's married to her mother's cousin, Olivia - but he said this was totally doable and he'd be happy to mentor me anytime. I think I might actually do it. I even have a name - Furever Friends: Stray Valley. I couldn't decide which I liked better so I added a colon to use both!"

"That sounds amazing, Heather. I'm sure my kids would love to play a game like that! How are things with you and Ash's dad these days?"

"As good as they've ever been, probably. Even when we dated. It's sort of strictly professional between us, but Ash comes home happy from spending time with Malcolm's family, so I can't complain. I guess they just got a new puppy, too."

"The kids won't stop trying to convince us to get another dog," Spencer moaned. "I think we're hoping to change their minds with a hamster, if anything."

When they finished eating, they moved to the cantina, where Heather decided to autonomously mix drinks at the crowded bar. Spencer danced the Selvadoradian rhumba in the courtyard while she talked Omiscan mythology with the locals. She was an expert in Selvadoradian customs after all her time spent in the temples and among the people, and she never tired of talking about the secrets of Selvadorada's past.

Their night continued until Heather began to feel feverish and fatigued again. Though the antidote had seemed to work, the women didn't want to take any chances and called it a night.

As long as Heather was feeling well enough, they had a temple to explore before returning home. ->

<- Previous Chapter | Gen 2 Start | Gen 2.1 Summary

Gen 1 Start | Gen 1 Summary

Landgraab Curse you say?! More on that, here, if you want to know more.

A massive shout out to @opalsimmer and @berrysims-lp, whose sims Lucia, Silas, Neve, and Terrell first saw this medallion inside the Selvadorada museum! I recreated it in my game with @opalsimmer's help and intend to explore this mysterious Landgraab/Goth lore. (Uncovering some family secrets, of course!)

And thank you @oimygiblets for letting me make Calivia Forever canon even though your story takes place about three decades before mine!! And @opalsimmer and @matchalovertrait for naming Heather's video game! 🙌🙌🙌

#sims 4 #sims 4 gameplay #sims 4 screenshots #sims 4 legacy #sims in bloom #ts4 #ts4 gameplay #ts4 legacy #ts4 screenshots #sims 4 story #ts4 story #legacy challenge #sims legacy #ts4 legacy challenge #gen 2 #selvadorada

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ssivinee · 1 year ago

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✧In Control✧

Jam Republic! Kirsten Dodgen x Idol! F Reader: You were the famous soloist, Han Y/n, and held a complex reputation for yourself, but that doesn't stop Mnet from inviting you as a guest judge on Street Woman Fighter 2. You didn't know much about the foreign dancers, but this one caught your eye.

Word Count: 4.8k

Note: I toooootally didn't struggle while writing this🥲

Character Vision Board

Being in the limelight was always familiar territory to you. It was something you were always bound by due to your sister being one of the most notable actresses in the acting industry today. Your older sister, Han Sohee, had always been popular with everyone. Her authoritative and sophisticated qualities had everyone on their knees, adoring her existence. With releases like “My Name” and “Nevertheless” on Netflix, your sister has been recognized for her talents worldwide. You couldn’t have been more proud of your sister's mind-blowing career, always supporting it in any manner.

You, on the other hand, had your fame in the music field. The Han Y/n began as a soloist under Pnation and had a significant fanbase, mainly consisting of Sohee’s fangirls. Nevertheless, when you started releasing music, your career exploded with the sound of R&B you delivered. The public idolized your image, often calling you the “Predebut Han Sohee.” You had tattoos and piercings, had an extended wolf cut, loved partying, and had the tomboy style. It had the male public hating you and their girlfriends wanting you. Through your career with Pnation, you gained many friends who were also soloists in the industry, B.I. being one of them. During his time with YG, you always went to their concerts, ensuring your best friend knew you’d be right by his side no matter what.

If people didn’t believe in your bond before, the union was proven when you made an unexpected move. When B.I. left YG and decided to create the 131 Label, you quickly joined the company and collaborated with the fellow soloist. BTBT was a hit, not only in popularity, but the song was undeniably a banger, and you were honored to even be featured in it, even making an appearance in the music video.

But fame wasn’t always going to be in your favor. As an avid party girl, you fell into a hole of rumors and lies. You were in a scandal after almost every event, especially with female idols. So here you were again, with Hanbin and Sohee in your apartment, reading the statement your company had released, denying the accusations again. This time, it was with Blackpink’s Rose, as the public had seen you coming out of dinner together in Paris.

“I just can’t be friends with anyone nowadays.” You scoff, forehead in hand, and hear both chuckling at your issue. “You can’t blame the public, Y/n. Everyone is just in love with you,” your sister points out, and you roll your eyes. “Says you, unnie.”

“You should be used to this by now, noona,” Hanbin tells you with shrugging shoulders, and you can’t help but laugh. “I am, though! It seems like the public is the one who isn’t.” You were aware of your impression on the public, but it irritated you when they acted this way. But that was just part of your job, telling yourself that every single time a scandal happened. “Disregarding that for now, aren’t you excited about next week?” Hanbin asks you, and Sohee looks at him confusingly.

“I’m the guest judge for Street Woman Fighter,” you say in a calm timbre, and your sister’s eyes widen. “You gonna meet Jam Republic, Bebe, and Tsubakill?” You look shocked at your sister. “You knew who was on the show yet had no idea I’d be guesting next week?” Your teasing tone made your sister smack your arm, “I only saw clips, okay? But I’m excited for you!” She gets jumpy in her chair while Hanbin laughs at you, a face holding disgust as you watch your sister. “She can’t even be happy. She knows nothing about the international crews,” Hanbin points at you accusingly, and you just shake your head. “I can’t help it, okay? I only know 1Million because of Lia unnie.”

As the two of them argue with you and introduce the other crews to you, a set of girls were squealing in their hotel in another part of Seoul. The two youngest of Jam Republic watched on an iPad, and the three oldest sat there, watching them in slight worry. “Are they okay?” Ling whispers to the two, and Latrice laughs, “They’ve been obsessed with Han Y/n since they found out she’d be the next guest judge.”

“Han Y/n?” Kristen asks confusingly. Ling and Latirce can’t hold back the distress on their faces, “Yes, Kirs, THE Han Y/n.” Kristen shrugs at their words, “I don’t know her.” That’s when the two youngest hear this and let out a blaring gasp. “Girl, you have to listen to her music,” Audrey says, shoving her phone in the leader’s face. Kristen listened and was pleased to hear everything presented to her.

“Dude, she’s smoking hot, man,” Emma voices, and she relaxes more on the couch, thinking of seeing your face. Ling rolls her eyes at her, and Latrice smiles, finding Emma’s rare fangirling cute.

This intrigues Kirsten. Emma wouldn’t openly share things like that but had no hesitation regarding you.

Before the day came to the first start of the Kpop mission, Kirsten found herself having your songs on repeat, dancing to them when she had the time. Her crew observed her, loving her newfound liking for you. Well, not you specifically. The woman still had no idea about what you looked like, only ravishing over your music.

“She gonna be so surprised tomorrow,” Ling tells the group as they watch their leader dance in the studio, and everyone nods. “Agreed.”

Finally, it was time for your appearance on the show, and you made sure to be prepared for the first impressions you were about to have on most of the girls.

The ride there was quite eventful, though. Friends were blowing up your phone in anticipation of your presence on the show. So when you make your way into the building, you send a selfie to the group chat, showing the building's lobby. Everyone fans over the sight and asks you to take pictures with specific crews, and you laugh at their texts.

You go backstage and see the guest room that was prepared for you. As you sat in a chair, the team touched up your hair and makeup. “Oh Y/n-nim!” You hear and see Monika coming from the door. “Monika-saem! It’s nice to see you again,” she greets you with a side hug. “Are you ready for this?”

“I can’t deny I’m a little nervous,” you tell her as you anxiously move around in the chair. “You? Nervous? Never thought I’d hear that from you,” she jokes while patting your back. “I’m not known to be a dancer like that! I’m just worried about the public's opinion.” She then looks you dead in the eyes, “You know well that you shouldn’t be worried. The people will always love you, Y/n-ah. Besides, everyone knows you’re a talented dancer.”

“Thank you, unnie.” She nods at your appreciation and smiles. “Have you met Shownu yet?” You shake, “I met him during the Hero promotions a few years ago.” The male idol walks in as if right on queue, with 3 caramel iced coffees in his hand. “I heard my name?”

“Of course you did. With your sonic hearing,” you say, making the two judges laugh. He hands you the coffee, and you thank him. “Dude, you’re gonna be so hyped when you see them all dance.” Your brow raises at his statement, “Now you're raising my expectations too high. They might blame you if I’m too harsh on them.”

“You can’t even be too harsh. They’re all professionals. I'm sure they’ll be to your standards.” Monika points out, and Shownu nods. Everyone starts getting ready, and when it's time to announce you, you hear Daniels' voice ringing in your ears. “Today, as your guest judge for the Kpop mission, we have Korean-American solo artist Han Y/n.”

You walk out onto the stage's walkway, bowing at everyone as you walk to your seat. Emma and Audrey could be seen jumping up and down, hugging each other when seeing you in person. Ling and Latrice, on the other hand, felt a sense of comfort when they heard that you're also American. They blindly trusted you, hoping you wouldn’t be so biased amongst the Korean crews.

Kirsten was the only one who stood in that room, frozen, when you walked in. She knew to predict someone attractive since the girls fangirled over your face for the entire week, but she wasn't expecting this. You looked like you were built by the gods. All she wanted to do was get on her knees and thank them.

“Wah~ Everyone’s right when they say she's every girl's type.” 1Million Redy says in awe of you.

“She’s so pretty, what the heck?”

“You think I can get a picture after?”

All the crews cheered and gossiped at your appearance, admiring your appearance.

“Hello, I’m soloist Han Y/n. Please take care of me,” you bow and introduce yourself in Korean, English, and Japanese to the teams. “I’d love to take care of you,” Kirsten mumbles under her breath, but Latrice hears the words, giggling at the sight of her leader, who looked like she was about to drool because of you. “Kirs, pull yourself together.”

“I can’t help it, like are we looking at the same person?” Kirsten dramatically sighed, and the girls teased. “Maybe you should ask her for help later~.”

“I’m sure she’d be happy to help you,” Ling gazes at her leader with a wink. “Alright, please pay attention and stop bullying me,” they all laugh, and your eyes find their way to the sound. “The Kpop mission has everyone fighting against each other with songs under the 4 companies: HYBE, JYP, SM, and YG.”

You relax in the chair, manspreading a little as Daniel continues, “2 of the 4 companies have a three-way tie and will battle it out here in the fight zone. The crew with the most votes will have to choose a different company to work with.” You nod in understanding. As much as Kirsten would like to say she was listening, she watched your loosened stance on the chair. You looked so fine just sitting there, and Kirsten bit her lips at the sight of you. She was a sucker for piercings and tattoos, which you did have, but her eyes lingered on your arms. Your veins could be seen popping out as they rested comfortably on your chest, and your lap looked like the perfect seat for her. “We’ll start off today with HYBE. Jam Republic, you're up first,” Daniel announces, pulling Kristen out of her unholy thoughts.

The girls get up from their seats, stretching more, “Should we just go for it?” She asks her team, and everyone nods, “Yeah, let's go.”

The girls stood before the judges as some other crews stayed beside them to enjoy the front view. Your eyes travel from every girl on the team until you stop at the leader. “Kirsten Dodgen, huh?” You whisper, remembering everything Hanbin and Sohee told you about the girl. How she was the famous “green shirt girl” in Justin Beiber’s “Sorry” music video and how she was part of the mega crew, the Royal Family. With this information in mind, your eyes never left hers as they performed.

When holding the starting pose, Kirsten feels the weight of your gaze, feeling her hands gradually sweat. The music begins with Le Seraphim's track starting them off, and regardless of how nervous you make the girl, she shows you every cent of confidence she has. Her hips moved swiftly like water, and you can’t help but bite your lip at the sight. She could really move, you admit to yourself. The afro-dance was evident in how she carried herself, the rhythm similar to the choreography of BTBT, which led to your body feeling uncontrollable. Swaying to the way they moved.

“Well, we know who Y/n would’ve voted for,” Mina Myoung quips as all the crews watch you enjoy their performance. “Dope” by BTS begins to blare on the speakers, and their groove switches to Hip-Hop. Audrey put a smile on your face with her facial expressions and nearing the end, when the finale consisted of the little twist their waist did with an added reverb effect, you toss your hands up with a clap, “That was nasty,” you told Shownu who nods in agreement.

Mannequeen then took the stage, and once again, everyone had high energy as they watched. The same could be said for DeepNDap. Still, once people saw the votes, everyone felt the intensity of the room when seeing DeepNDap lost by a landslide compared to the two other crews. “That’s gotta burn,” you mumble.

Next was the JYP battle, and Tsubakill went first. Your attentiveness shows with the scary look in your eyes, but you get hyped up when Tsubakill uses their shirts as a prop, clapping at the scene. Then, Team Bebe joined the stage, and it was phenomenal. You shouldn’t have felt any anxiety or nervousness since you thoroughly enjoyed each performance, especially when Bada is revealed through the imitation of double doors. You smirk at the sight, finding it quite enticing to look at.

“Another heart stealer, huh?” You tell Shownu, who chuckles at your words. While you watch, Kirsten notices the look you give team Bebe. “Looks like someone likes team Bebe as well,” and the team looks at you. “I don’t blame her,” Audrey shrugs, and Emma laughs, “Everyone’s in love with Bada as well. They’re like a match made in heaven.”

Kirsten's chest tightens at her members' words. You surely weren't interested in the taller dancer...right?

“Kirs? You good?” Latrice asks, and she nods, not wanting to expose herself, but Emma catches on quickly. “I think Kirs may have a slight problem,” the second youngest teases the leader, and the younger girl points at Bada. “She may have some competition.” Kirsten rolls her eyes at the girls as they snicker around her. Because of their noises, your attention goes to them. You see the frustration on the girl's face, and it makes you smile. She looked so adorable with a pout on her face. This causes you to barely watch the 1Million stage.

“I hope whatever song we get, we’ll do good.”

“We’re always good guys. As long as we try our best, that’s all that matters.” You hear from the dancer and nod to yourself, her words also resonating with you. When the votes came in, Tsubakill had zero votes, and you gasped. Everyone must’ve really liked the dance if they had no votes. So when each group is presented with their company of choice, everyone begins practicing.

You began walking around, handing bottles to each team and chatting with them. Your first few stops were DeepNDap, Lady Bounce, Mannequeen, and Wolf’Lo, and then you make it to the trendiest crew on the show.

“Hello~,” you said, bowing to the girls of team Bebe. They all look at you with terrified eyes. You chuckle at this, “Here, I don’t bite,” you tell them as you hand the water bottles, everyone thanking you. “You didn’t have to, Y/n-nim,” the blonde, Tatter, says, but you shake your head. “It’s the least I can do for you guys.”

You straighten your shirt and ask, “Do you guys have anything yet?” “Yeah, we have a bit for the chorus,” Bada says, and you settle in the dance studio a bit more, sitting on the floor in front of them. “Can I get a sneak peek?” They all nod excitedly, and you hide a giggle, finding the younger girls cute. They play Maniac by Stray Kids from the chorus, and your smile grows when you see the blonde being dragged with her team walking, almost like robots, beside her. When finished presenting, you stand up, clapping your hands. “I can’t wait to see the final product, girls.” They bow, most covering their face in happiness. “You're leading your team well. I can tell your chemistry is strong,” you say as you pat Bada’s arms. “Thank you, Y/n,” she smiles, and you head out. “Okay, good luck, guys! I’m gonna bring more water for the other teams.”

Then your next stop is 1Million, and you enter their rehearsal room with a cheesing grin. “Lia-unnie~,” you say, walking towards her to hug her. You had worked with Lia in a previous comeback and were close friends with her. She made the entire process enjoyable for you. You always kept that in mind since it was stressful, and you appreciated her guidance. “Y/n-ah,” she says softly, reciprocating the loving hug. “I brought all you guys water,” you tell them, showing the bag filled with bottles.

They thank you, and you watch them practice a little, and you can tell Lia is stressed the entire time. So once they took a break, you approached her, giving her a piece of candy. “Here, don’t be too hard on yourself, unnie,” you say, patting the older’s shoulder. “I can’t help it, Y/n. Everyone has high expectations for me here.” You nod, understanding the pressure she felt. “That doesn’t matter. You’re one of the greatest choreographers out there. I’m sure you’ll make it past this unnie,” you try and reassure her, and she tells you to get going so they can practice. You mumble fine and move along to your next destination.

Tsubakill. The girls were so concentrated on practicing they didn’t even notice your arrival in their room. “Hello?” You question in Japanese, and they jump in surprise. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to scare you all,” you chuckle at their reactions.

“I’m here to just deliver some water, and I’ll be out of your way,” they gratefully accepted the water bottles but were curious. “Your Japanese is really good. Where did you learn?” Their youngest, Rena, questions you.

“Aye~ I’m not that good. But I wanted to learn for my Japanese fans to communicate with them when promoting.” A series of ‘ah’s could be heard. “That does make sense.”

“Anyways, I don’t think you guys need any of my feedback right now, so I’ll leave you all to it,” you wave off and end with the final team you were anticipating. You searched for them in every room but finally found them practicing on the walkway area on the second floor.

Your eyes linger on the team, not wanting to distract them while they do a draft take of their dance. That's when your gaze lands on Kirsten as she leads her team, “So when we do this swing part, I want both of you to kind of mimic the movement,” she tells Ling and Latrice, who automatically follow her lead, taking the critiques into account.

“Hey,” you voice out, and everyone stares at you, not knowing what to say. “Um… I brought you guys some water,” you say in English, and they smile. “Thanks,” Kirsten tells you, and you give a curt nod, “It’s no problem.”

“You guys are insane, by the way,” you say as you tilt your head to the side. “I hope you guys don’t mind if I watch your practice for a bit.”

“Of course not, by all means. Just try and get comfortable,” she gives you a wink with a teasing grin, and your head falls back due to her gesture. This girl was gonna be trouble for you. You travel to a chair in the corner and watch as the practice goes on, eyes never leaving Kirsten's figure.

Your head spins at how she moves, finding her body rousing to witness. That was until they made it to the next series of parts. Kirsten had to shake her hips, but somehow, it wasn’t up to the quality of your liking. You raise your hand, and the crew notices, “Yes, Y/n?” “Sorry, but when you move your hips, you can exaggerate more.”

“Can you show us what you mean?” Latrice presses on, and you make your way over to Kirsten. You towered behind their leader, and your hands traveled down her hips. Position her into the move and put pressure on your hands as you take control of her lower half. Kirsten’s mind was out of focus when she felt your strong, veiny hands touching her. “I know you can move those hips, girl, so how about we put them to work?” You question in her ear, and she has a devious grin. “Show me then.”

Her team watches as you rotate her hips with the touch of your hands, and they can’t help but giggle on the sidelines. “She took asking for help way too seriously,” Audrey whispers, and the rest nod with their fits of giggles.

You two feel a rhythm despite no music, and Kirsten’s heart fastens as you caress her waist. “Shit, you- you are so beautiful,” you mumble but make sure she heard it, and her face reddened. She shakes her head, straightens, and claps at her team, “Alright, thank you, Y/n, but we have to do some more choreo to be in top shape in 2 days.” You stand there a bit surprised, which follows a soft laugh at her crappy excuse. “Okay, okay. I’ll just watch a bit more.” You sat back in your chair, watching them more freely this time as they did their work.

After an hour, you look at the phone and decide it is an excellent time to head home, but talk to the girls before leaving. “Are you guys free tomorrow?” “I believe so, why?” Kirsten asks, and you hand your phone over to her, “I thought it would be a good idea to bring all the crews out for a relaxing night. I was gonna rent out the VIP section of a club before you guys performed.”

The girls all jump in excitement while Audrey sulks, and you pat her head, “I know you're too young, Audrey, but I’ll plan a dinner with everyone just for you.” Her eyes brighten at your promise as she hugs you. “Okay, don’t kill the woman now, Audrey,” Ling tells the youngest, and everyone laughs. Kristen puts her number in, and you grin, “Okay, good luck with practice, girls. I’ll chat with you later, Kristen,” you point at her, and she waves you off seductively.

“Kirs is down bad right now.”

“Stand up, girl,” Emma jokes, and the leader rolls her eyes at the team.

The next day, every girl was preparing for the long night ahead, and Audrey watched her team as they frantically ran around their hotel room. “You guys look good in anything,” the youngest says, but everyone pays no mind. “This is what I get for trying to be nice,” she mumbles, but Emma hears it and laughs. “They stressed Auds. What can we do,” Emma says with a shrug.

After an hour, all the girls were ready, and Kirsten revealed her outfit. She had a pleated denim skirt, a pale yellow halter top, and white mini-heels. The leader's hair looked slightly slicked back, and it tied everything together. “Ooo~, who are you about to show out for?” Ling taunts and Kirs has a light smirk on her face, “You already know, girl.”

The girls squeal in eagerness, “So we ready to go?” The older three nod and Audrey walks them out, “Be safe, and don’t come home too late.” The older girls hug her goodbye and travel to the club by Uber. You had sent the leader the details, and she was incredibly excited when you said, “I can’t wait to see you there, beautiful.” It caused her so much happiness the entire day that she couldn’t sit still.

Once the four entered the club, they were escorted to the VIP area on the second floor, overlooking the crowds who cheered for Y/n and the other crews. You sat at the bar, Lia and Bada by your side, with a dark-colored drink in hand. Kristen halts when she sees you. Your attendance wakes her up as she notices every detail about you.

Kirsten wanted to tell you how delicious you looked, but just for the sake of her pride, she greets the other girls instead before getting to you. Bada points at the foreign crew, making you look at them, and a coy grin forms on your face. The Jam Republic crew began to split up, talking to multiple other teams, and you made your way over to Kristen, who sat with some of the Mannequeen girls.

“I’m glad you could make it,” you say, handing her a drink of soju, as you weren’t really familiar with her type of alcohol. She thanks you and sips the beverage, “I’d never say no to a party and having fun.”

“I don’t either, but I was kinda excited for this one,” You voiced in a playful tone, and Kirsten smirked, deciding to play along. “Oh yeah? Why is that?” Your body bends down to her ear, and she feels your breath tickling her as you breathe out, “It means I get to see you more.”

The shorter girl’s breathing becomes unsteady at the close distance. Still, Kirsten's exact flirtatious nature wouldn’t make that obvious. You take her hand and lead her to the bar, “Is there something you prefer to drink?” “Coke and rum would be nice,” and your eyebrows go up at this. “My type of girl,” You tell her calmly, ordering the drink as a blush forms on her cheeks. “So, the green shirt girl in Justin Bieber’s music video?” Kristen lets out a burst of laughter at your random question.

“You went viral all those years ago, and I never knew who you were? I’m so out of touch with internet culture,” you shared, your head hanging low with a chuckle. “It’s fine. I was also seventeen then, so you probably wouldn’t even recognize me.”

“SEVENTEEN?” You inquisitively ask, and she nods. “Well, you grew up into a fine young woman, if I say so myself,” you tell her as you take a swig of alcohol. “You say that as if you’re much older than me,” Kirsten looks at you with a questioning face. “Hey, 3 years is quite some time, okay?” You point out, both of you letting out a laugh.

“How about you? I don’t know how you got into dancing,” She says truthfully, and you think. “It hasn’t been that long since I started. Compared to you guys, I’m pretty mediocre at best.” Now, that statement, Kirsten knew, was a lie. “That’s definitely not true,” She says, and you look at her curiously. “How would you know?”

“Or else you wouldn’t have been a judge on the show,” She explains. The truth was, she had watched some of your dancing videos throughout the years, but why would she want to expose herself in front of you. “That’s true, I guess.” You were about to continue, but another song started, and the whole club cheered. Kirsten’s eyes brightened at the song, and she pulled you to the dance floor, “Come on, let’s dance!” She says, trying to yell over the loud music.

Once the two of you were on the dance floor, you felt the mixture of sweaty bodies and the wafting scent of alcohol that clung to everyone’s bodies. That didn’t matter to either of you, though, as Kirsten confidently whines her waist to the beat. Your eyes study her with hunger, finding every curve of her body moving to the rhythm. Your self-control defeats you as you grasp her waist, and Kristen feels the warmth of your hands. She moves back, grinding her ass on your body, and you wrap one arm around her waist as you motion in sync. The shorter applies more pressure on your pelvis, and you can’t help but let out a subtle groan in her ear, finding her irresistible. The halter top didn’t cover much, and you wanted to touch every part you could, skimming over her chest as if her skin begged to be marked.

She turns around, arms wrapping around your neck, closing the distance between you two, if possible. Now you felt her chest beating on yours, your forehead resting on each other. Her eyes linger on your lips, and you notice, when bitting your lips, that she lets out giggles of expectation. You adored the charming sounds, and your lips chased hers, and you felt the buzz of her lips on yours. The taste of sweetness from the alcohol lingered on her tongue as they mingled harmoniously. Hearing the soft whimpers encourages you to pull her waist tighter, hand leading lower and lower on her body. You pull away, trying to catch your breath as you mumble to her, “You think you’ll be able to dance if I take you home tonight?”

“I’ll make it work,” She mumbles, pulling you in again. The kiss felt heated as her hands roam around your toned figure, “Besides, I told you I want to have fun tonight.” You smirk at her words and pull her out of the club, ensuring you made it worth her while tonight.

Tag list (OPEN): @gaymoregayandgayer @froufrousnowman @yxine @tikitsune @kpopgirl-97 @hellokittyyysstuff

#kristen dodgen x reader #kristen dodgen #kristen #jam republic x f reader #jam republic #jam republic x reader #swf #street woman fighter x fem reader #street woman fighter 2 #street woman fighter x reader #wlw #gxg #ssivinee

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inaccuratelybiblicalangel · 3 days ago

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Lana Playlist ;

1.Kill Kill 2. Queen of the Gas Station 3. Oh Say Can You See 4. Gramma (Blue Ribbon Sparkler Trailer Heaven) 5. For K, Pt. 2 6. Jump 7. Mermaid Motel 8. Raise Me Up (Mississippi South) 9. Pawn Shop Blues 10. Brite Lites 11. Put Me in a Movie 12. Smarty 13. Yayo 14. Born to Die 15. Off to the Races 16. Blue Jeans 17. Video Games⁹ 18. Diet Mountain Dew 19. National Anthem 20. Dark Paradise 21. Radio 22. Carmen 23. Million Dollar Man 24. Summertime Sadness 25. This Is What Makes Us Girls 26. Ride 27. American 28. Cola 29. Body Electric 30. Blue Velvet 31. Gods & Monsters 32. Bel Air 33. Burning Desire 34. Cruel World 35. Ultraviolence 36. Shades of Cool 37. Brooklyn Baby 38. West Coast 39. Sad Girl 40. Pretty When You Cry 41. Money Power Glory 42. ***ed My Way Up to the Top 43. Old Money 44. The Other Woman 45. Honeymoon 46. Music to Watch Boys To 47. Terrence Loves You 48. God Knows I Tried 49. High by the Beach 50. Freak 51. Art Deco 52. Burnt Norton (Interlude) 53. Religion 54. Salvatore 55. The Blackest Day 56. 24 57. Swan Song 58. Don’t Let Me Be Misunderstood 59. Love 60. Lust for Life 61. 13 Beaches 62. Cherry 63. White Mustang 64. Summer Bummer 65. Groupie Love 66. In My Feelings 67. Coachella – Woodstock in My Mind 68. God Bless America – And All the Beautiful Women in It 69. When the World Was at War We Kept Dancing 70. Beautiful People Beautiful Problems 71. Tomorrow Never Came 72. Heroin 73. Change 74. Get Free 75. Norman F***ing Rockwell 76. Mariners Apartment Complex 77. Venice Bitch 78. F*** It I Love You 79. Doin’ Time 80. Love Song 81. Cinnamon Girl 82. How to Disappear 83. California 84. The Next Best American Record 85. The Greatest 86. Bartender 87. Happiness is a Butterfly 88. Hope Is a Dangerous Thing for a Woman Like Me to Have - But I Have It 89. White Dress 90. Chemtrails Over the Country Club 91. Tulsa Jesus Freak 92. Let Me Love You Like a Woman 93. Wild at Heart 94. Dark But Just a Game 95. Not All Who Wander Are Lost 96. Yosemite 97. Breaking Up Slowly 98. Dance Till We Die 99. For Free 100. Text Book 101. Blue Banisters 102. Arcadia 103. Interlude – The Trio 104. Black Bathing Suit 105. If You Lie Down With Me 106. Beautiful 107. Violets for Roses 108. Dealer 109. Thunder 110. Wildflower Wildfire 111. Nectar of the Gods 112. Living Legend 113. Cherry Blossom 114. Sweet Carolina 115. The Grants 116. Did You Know That There’s a Tunnel Under Ocean Blvd 117. Sweet 118. A&W 119. Judah Smith Interlude 120. Candy Necklace 121. Jon Batiste Interlude 122. Kintsugi 123. Fingertips 124. Paris, Texas 125. Grandfather Please Stand on the Shoulders of My Father While He’s Deep-Sea Fishing 126. Let the Light In 127. Margaret 128. Fishtail 129. Peppers 130. Taco Truck x VB 131. Young and Beautiful (Demo) 132. Black Beauty 133. Florida Kilos 134. Behind Closed Doors 135. So Legit 136. Riverside 137. You Can Be the Boss 138. Kinda Outta Luck 139. Velvet Crowbar 140. Wait for Life 141. I Talk to Jesus 142. The Lullaby 143. Summer of Sam 144. Jump (Demo) 145. Hollywood's Dead 146. Maha 147. Queen of Disaster 148. My Best Days 149. Life is Beautiful 150. Gramma (Blue Ribbon Sparkler Trailer Heaven) (Demo) 151. Burning Desire (Demo) 152. In the Sun 153. Butterfly 154. X-Cops 155. Planet of the Apes 156. Red Hot 157. Afraid 158. Tropico (Demo) 159. Chuck's in Love 160. The Other Woman (Demo) 161. Flipside 162. Queen of the Gas Station (Demo) 163. Run With Me 164. Old Money (Demo) 165. The Big Bad Wolf 166. I Will Wait 167. Stars in the Sky 168. Alligator 169. So Strange 170. Dancing with the Devil 171. Wildflower 172. Pretty Little Miss 173. F*** You (Lana Del Rey) 174. GO GO Dancer 175. Beautiful player 176. This is what makes us girls (Demo 2 & 3)

#lana del rey unreleased #lana is god #lana unreleased #lana del ray aka lizzy grant #lana del rey #lana del ray aesthetic #just girly thoughts #just girly things #im just a girl #just a girlblog #girly stuff #lizzy grant unreleased #lizzy grant aesthetic #lizzie grant #elizabeth woolridge grant #girlblogging #hell is a teenage girl #girlhood

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fxrmuladaydreams · 1 year ago

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Hi! I'm in quite an angsty mood at the minute, so my blurb request us for something a little sad with Lando. Could I request an angst with two prompts (9 + 131). I'm thinking like Lando gets in a crash and reader is scared of losing him, so she stays by his side, and happy ending - Lando is okay? Tysm! Hope you're doing well lovely 😘

send me thoughts/blurb requests (sfw & nsfw) for lando weekend

notes: this one is angsty guys, but there’s a happy ending. also please forgive me if i do horribly at describing the crash and the hospital setting, i am not a mechanic nor am i a doctor

warnings: car crash, hospitalization

A silence fell over the track as the papaya colored car rammed into the wall. He was doing well, second only behind Max. He was driving through a chicane, weaving back and forth, until he started sliding around. The car had spun out off the track, then collided with the wall.

A red flag was called immediately, the other drivers all making their way back to the pit lane. You stared up at the screens in the garage. The front of the car was crumpled, the black number four now bent up. You could hear Lando’s engineer talking, asking for Lando to respond, to say he was okay.

Smoke started to rise from the car into the air.

You felt your heart drop and pound in your chest simultaneously.

The safety car is quick to get to his car, pulling his unmoving body out of the crumpled car. They put him in the safety car, and drive off towards the medical car.

You want to go to him, to see him, to see that he’s still alive, that he’s okay. You feel a hand on your shoulder and turn to see Oscar standing next to you.

“I’m sure he’s okay. The damage was mostly to the front of the car. Plus the halo took most of the hit to the wall.” He tells you softly.

You know Oscar has a talent for being passive, but you can tell he’s struggling to hold his emotions together. Oscar joins you at the hospital they’re keeping Lando at once the race has finished. He sits with you while you sit next to your boyfriend, holding his hand.

He’s got wires connected to him, and a heart monitor attached, the steady beeping giving you a bit of hope. The doctors say he’s alright, he just needs to wake up. He had fainted due to the crash, and his body had shut down. He’s recuperating, they said. He just needs to wake up on his own.

Oscar leaves once visiting hours are over, heading back to the hotel to rest. You opt to stay with Lando, just in case anything happens, in case he wakes up.

You spend the night sleeping in an uncomfortable chair, leaning against his hospital bed. When you wake up, Lando is still unconscious, his breathing still steady.

You didn’t think it would take this long for Lando to wake up. Was there something more that the doctors didn’t tell you? Should he be awake by now?

You feel a few tears start to trail down your cheeks as you look at your boyfriend. His face is slightly pale, it’s odd seeing as he likes to keep up with his tan. His hair is matted down, less fluffy than usual. His chest slowly rises and falls with every breath he takes.

“Wake up Lando, please. I’ve gotten used to seeing your stupid face everyday, you can’t take that away from me.” You attempt to joke. “You need to wake up because I can’t do this without you.” You say sincerely.

You lean your head down on his arm, crying into the fabric of his hospital gown.

“Why are you crying love?” His voice is rough, almost scratchy, but you recognize it immediately.

Your head shoots up at see Lando giving you a tired smile. You throw your arms around him, pulling him into a bone crushing hug, only pulling away when you hear him groan.

“Sorry, I’m sorry.” You wipe at your eyes frantically. “I should get the nurse.” You stand up and start to step away when Lando tugs on your hand.

He doesn’t really have any strength, but you turn back to him.

“Stay? Just for a minute?” He shifts a little, creating a space next to him on the bed for you to lay.

You nod and lay down next to him.

He tells you about the crash, about the fear coursing through him as he spun waiting for the impact. He tells you that the last thing he remembers was thinking about you, about how he wished you weren’t watching the screens so you wouldn’t have to see it.

“I won’t leave you. Not like this. I’ll spend a thousand lifetimes coming back to you. It doesn’t matter how much I crash, I’ll always come back to you.”

You spend a little while with him before a nurse comes in to check on him, surprised that he’s awake. She’s quick to shoo you out of the bed, but you keep yourself planted at his side. You’re not leaving him anytime soon.

#lando norris x reader #lando norris #lando weekend #ln4 #formula one x reader

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epicbuddieficrecs · 7 months ago

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Weekly Recap | July 15th-21st 2024

I have a week off of work, woohoo! This week I mostly read all of my favourite WIPs that updated multiple times, thank you all for keeping me well fed 😎

Complete

is there some place where we can go right now? (i don't think that it can wait) by sibylsleaves/ @sibylsleaves (Established Buddie, Bar Sex, PWP | 2K | Explicit): Buck, Eddie, and the inside of a bar bathroom

you call me pretty little thing by sibylsleaves/ @sibylsleaves (Established Buddie, Panty Kink, PWP | Explicit): “Buck,” Eddie breathes after a moment. “Are you wearing—?” Buck nips at Eddie’s slack mouth and says coyly, “Why don’t you see for yourself?” Eddie, it seems, doesn’t need to be told twice. He shoves Buck off his lap, tearing his sweatpants down his hips to reveal the tiny, pink lace panties Buck has on beneath them.

looking for something dumb to do by sibylsleaves/ @sibylsleaves (Buddie Wedding, PWP | 4K | Explicit): It’s also not unusual that the app bay is almost empty when they walk inside, save for one engine parked along the side. What is unusual is the rows of white folding chairs facing the back wall. And the archway adorned with greenery and pale pink blossoms set up beneath the loft. And all of their friends milling about the app bay, dressed up like… Like they’re attending a wedding.

Hell or High Water by glorious_spoon/ @glorious-spoon (4x04: What's Your Grievance, PWP, First Time | 5K | Explicit): That’s Buck’s cue to put a stop to this before it crosses a line they can’t come back from. Before he says something or does something that means Eddie will never touch him or smile at him or let him into his home again. Buck breaks things; that’s what he does. And he’s tried so hard not to break this.

🔥 my man says he loves me (never says he loves me not) by colonoscopys/ @colonoscopys (Post-S7, Identity Porn | 9K | General): It’s the summer after Eddie blows his life up that he realizes he kinda wants to do it again. He’s looking at the TV, watching some shitty, fuzzy screen show that Buck favored on his last shift, and letting sleep kinda wash in and wash out. There’s an ad after a while. “Are you struggling with being in love with your best friend too?” The man asks. “You should sign up for inlovewithmybestfriendandgoingtodie.com. A support group dedicated to people in love with their best friend, inlovewithmybestfriendandgoingtodie.com is a great way to learn how to cope and survive when you’re in love with someone you’ll never have!” Eddie gapes at the screen.

WIP

🔥 Held Up a Lightning Rod (Wonder Why I'm Struck) by letmetellyouaboutmyfeels/ @letmetellyouaboutmyfeels (Not A Firefighter Eddie, Sugar Baby Buck | 17/22 | 88K | Explicit): When Eddie Diaz stumbles his way into money, he finds himself one of the most eligible bachelors in Los Angeles - to his dismay. He needs a way to get people off his back without confessing his messy marital situation, and Shannon's still not answering his calls, so he caves to a friend's suggestion: hire someone to pretend to be his partner. Enter Evan "Buck" Buckley: sugar baby, fire fighter, and the man about to turn Eddie's world upside down.

🔥 Long Death by Daisies_and_Briars/ @cal-daisies-and-briars (Post-S7, Vampire AU | 8/12 | 33K | Explicit): In the summer of 2024, a never before seen form of vampirism breaks out in Los Angeles. Just as Eddie is about to get his son back. Six months later, Buck's life is permanently changed.

drift past the flowers. by dylaesthetics (Post-S6, (Un)requited Love | 6/12 | 18K | Teen): OR Buck and Natalia get engaged, and Eddie flees the state about it. A petty email correspondence ensues.

🔥loves a game, wanna play? by 42hrb/ @exhuastedpigeon (Post-S7, Love Island AU | 6/13 | 26K | Mature): In the aftermath of Chris leaving for the summer, Buck convinces Eddie they should apply for Love Island together.

🔥 Things We're All Too Young to Know by Daisies_and_Briars/ @cal-daisies-and-briars (Canon S1-S6, Divergent Post-S6 | 131/? | 413K | Mature): This is a love story. Even if it doesn’t always look like it. Even if it doesn’t always feel like it. A look back on Eddie and Buck's lives up to now, and what led them to each other, interpreted from the current 9-1-1 canon.

🔥 If You Can Make the Music by Daisies_and_Briars/ @cal-daisies-and-briars (Canon Divergent, | 4/5 | 11K | Mature): Spin-off Sequel to Evan Buckley & the Coma-Verse of Madness - Chapter 5 (Seaside): A year after a whirlwind two week love affair with bartender Buck in Galveston, Texas, Eddie Diaz finds himself coincidentally relocating to the area. But when he attempts to reconnect with Buck, he's in for an unfortunate surprise. (Part 3 of Coma-Verse)

#epic buddie fic rec #buddie fic rec #buddie fanfic #buddie fic #buddie fanfiction #buddie

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hellbornsworld · 1 year ago

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JUNGKOOK WATTPAD RECOMMENDATIONS(3)₊˚✧ ﾟ.🐈‍⬛˚₊‧꒰ა ‧₊˚

˖°࿐ •⁀➷˖°࿐ •⁀➷˖°࿐ •⁀➷˖°࿐ •⁀➷˖°࿐ •⁀

"Would you dare to go inside?"

❝The moment I put this ring on your finger, you became my property.❞

🫧 𝐒𝐄𝐗 & 𝐋𝐎𝐕𝐄 | CEO!Jungkook X Employee!Reader | Fuckboy JK | Completed | Re-Uploaded in inkitt

"Do me Jungkook, p-please."

"With all the pleasure. I will fuck you, only fuck you with everything I have."

"I'm just 2 % straight y/n, but I can love you more than a hundred percent straight man"

"Admit it Jungkook, she'd rather sleep with me." Jimin Vs Jungkook

"fuck yourself... and let me watch"

❝She's a delicate little flower, hyung,❞ Jungkook grabs his leather jacket and slips it on. ❝And if anyone is going to hear sinful moans pass those innocent lips, it'll be me.❞

"i have died everyday waiting for you."

"i should be the one lying next to you at night."

What's wrong with being a little chaotic? -J JK

🫧 𝗥𝗲𝗱 | Mafia+Ceo!JK X Reader | 53 Chapters | Duration-8h 18m | Ongoing

"That dress-" he says, eyes raking down your body. "-is 𝘥𝘢𝘮𝘯 fucking distracting."

🫧 A Little Burden | Jungkook X Reader | 36 Chapters | Duration-3h 35m | Completed

I still remember that day clearly.....every night it comes back to me like a nightmare. The small fragile human getting pushed into my arms. Tears streaming down my face as I looked at her....Doctors storming in from everywhere trying everything they could to keep her alive. The look in her eyes she gave me made me break inside.

She knew she wasn't going to make it.

She smiled at me and took one last look at her child before speaking.

" notice me senpai " - jjk

A child must be sacrificed in order for the city to gain its happiness. a tale when doom and love are two sides of the same coin.

When the doctor tells the Jeon's that their newborn Jungsoo could die due to his premature birth, Mr. Jeon decides to clone him as soon as possible.

To their surprise, Jungsoo is able to grow up happy and healthy along with his clone, Jungkook, who's the total opposite of him.

❝ -How much is your daughter? ❞

Jungkook loves food and computer games, but compare to those two you are his favorite thing in this world.

He is the spitting image of an Angel but the blood in his veins is that of the Devil's.

❝Your son, he looks very similar to Jungkook...❞

Leave it to a 3-year-old to bring two parents back together.

❝ she slipped away the same way the velvet box slipped in my hand ❞ she was oddly peculiar and pure mystery yet, he still finds the refuge of feeling at "home" to the mute girl whom he met at the seaside.

A prince and servant girl grew up together in a castle. Best friends for life until that love as friends changed to something more. All was well until the prince was to be married and everything changed. Forever forbidden to be together but can one fateful reunion change everything?

"Jeon Jungkook, I like you." You said, your eyes wide and cheeks on fire. You finally had the guts to tell your long time crush what you feel about him. Jungkook smiled, giving you a spark of hope and a wash of relief. Or maybe it was a false hope or just him being kind as he says, "I'm sorry but I'm already in a relationship."

"...Kookie" she calls that's when Kookie's small little hands tugged onto his mother's sleeve's pulling her to look at him.

"what's wrong Kookie?"

❝I want to buy her❞

"You smell very nice."

"Are you...trying to flirt or something?"

A socially awkard witch has to struggle with being the sudden love (?) interest of a wolf shifter

"If they catch us, they will kill us."

"I don't give a fuck right now, baby."

"I don't call myself a pornstar, but I'm pretty famous on Live Babes (LB). I make money doing what people ask from me and they are mainly men, married man. Some even gave a wife or kids. But I don't care about that at all. The only thing I want is to continue earn their money. Oh! It's already 9PM! Don't forget to watch the show!"

"I can't wait, princess." -J.JK

What would you do if one day you woke up as Jeon Jungkook?

🫧His Gangster Girl | Jungkook X Gangster!Reader | 68 Chapters | Duration-8h 57m | completed

'She is a maze with no escape.'

🫧 Fuck It List | BFF!Jungkook X Reader | 60 Chapters | Duration-5h 30m | Completed

• Go skinny-dipping

• Have a make-out session

• Try foreplay with ice .....

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MASTERLIST is here for other recommendations

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thequiver · 9 months ago

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So Let's Talk about Pietro and Crystal...

In this meta I am going through Pietro Maximoff's relationship with Crystalia Amaquelin. This meta is not just going to focus on their interactions with one another but also on the ways that they talk about one another and on the culture/societal structure of the Inhumans and Crystal's privilege which are both major factors in this relationship. This reading list is going to have to be in parts just due to how much there is to talk about in these issues and I want to be able to share images freely! The only edits to any panels have been to arrange them in such a way that they easily fit in a tumblr post and to condense panels from the same comic into one image. The content of any panels has been unchanged, and all panels within the same image are displayed in they order they are found within the original printed comic.

Meta below the cut! This one's a doozy.

Pietro and Crystal's first meeting and then subsequent early courtship happens entirely off page between the events of The Avengers (1963) #104 and The Fantastic Four (1961) #131-132. Within The Fantastic Four (1961) #131 we get like little flashbacks in a handful of pages telling us that this has happened and giving us vignettes into how, but it doesn't really provide us with any particular details- which means that going into Fantastic Four (1961) #131, we know about as much as Johnny Storm (The Human Torch), Crystal's boyfriend.

The Fantastic Four (1961) #131

Which is to say that we know that he's come back from a mission only to discover that his girlfriend has been getting cozy with another guy. To Johnny's credit here, he's first mad at Crystal and not at Pietro who as far as we the reader can tell, had no idea that Crystal was dating the Human Torch. Pietro however.....despite clearly realizing that he's the side-piece is still defending Crystal and it's only after his defense of Crystal's decision to be a messy cheater that Johnny decides the two men have beef.

Within #131 we learn that Crystal found Pietro following some intense injuries sustained in a battle with a Sentinel (during a period of comics in which the Maximoff twins keep miraculously losing access to their mutant abilities at the drop of a hat for plot reasons?) and had nursed him back to health and during the days she spends at his bedside helping him recover, in which Crystal apparently decides he's the one while he's unconscious as the other Inhumans (particularly Medusa) around her begin to call her out on her reasons for wanting to stay by Pietro's bedside.

Crystal and Johnny have a conversation where she begs him for more time, and he reminds her (not unfairly) that she's had years of their relationship to think it over and that "if you don't love me- and only me- by now, it's time for me to read the handwriting on the wall." I'm not saying Pietro didn't see the red flags, I'm just saying he might be colorblind.

Within this issue we also get a taste of the Inhuman practice of slavery, wherein they place "Alpha Primitives" beneath them and we get to see the beginnings of an uprising (yay!), the uprising is presented as a bad thing and we're supposed to sympathize with the slavers (boo!). Johnny is portrayed here as being pro-slavery while Pietro is significantly more sensitive to the whole reality of their being enslaved. This being said, Pietro is still upset that the Alpha Primitives have taken Crystal captive and plans to save her, calling her "the girl I love." Johnny pretty rightfully points out that it's been only a few weeks of Crystal and Pietro knowing one another and Pietro....well...by this point we know he rushes into things. Pietro and Johnny run accidentally headfirst into each other during the revolt and Crystal is only concerned about Pietro's wellbeing and almost makes a threat against Johnny, even though it was Pietro who ran into the Human Torch.

The Fantastic Four (1961) #132 ends with Crystal basically going "this massive enemy that we've been fighting is powered by our own inherent guilt over being greedy enslaving racists (a guilt which has not been shown on page at ALL)." Somehow calling this out and actually triggering guilt does not at all further power their enemy but instead leaves him as an immobile statue and a reminder of how fucking racist they are- and then the Alpha Primitives are sent back down into the caves they live in without any form of reparations: "While the Alphas, free men now, return to their nighted catacombs...their own world...dark, but theirs no less for that. One day, they'll come again into the light and take a proffered brother's hand. One day...but not today." It should be noted, that the Inhumans do absolutely NOTHING to "proffer a brother's hand" in this issue, they just walk away from the Alphas and the Alphas go into their dark caves. In fact, the only Inhuman who seems to have had any kind of fondness for the Alphas is known shit-stirrer, Maximus who is kept in a perpetual open-air prison because none of them trust him. And Maximus was the one who built the machine that's supposedly powering Omega (the big enemy) but it's implied up until Crystal's speech that it is actual physical acts of violence against the Alphas that powers Omega.

Pietro ends this first big Crystal saga, brooding and moping because Johnny Storm has friends and he doesn't (he does...sorta, they're just not with him right now) , and Crystal breaks up with Johnny. And Johnny...does a complete 180 from #131 and is like "oh yeah actually I'm not at all upset that you cheated on me and I was hoping you'd break up with me and actually I have a date with my ex girlfriend tonight." Johnny does cry when he sees Crystal with Pietro, but that's really all we get for the end of their relationship. And for whatever reason the narrative seems to wrap itself around Crystal to make her look good.

Literally one issue later in The Avengers (1963) #110- this happens:

The Avengers (1963) #110

Within this issue Steve Englehart makes the BOLD move to position Pietro as some domineering patriarch when for literally every other appearance he's had with Wanda he has never ONCE positioned himself as "the head of our family." Pietro has up until this point been firm that he and Wanda are equals and just a few issues prior had issued the statement that he would never again even jokingly refer to her as "little sister."

Then in The Avengers (1963) #127, Pietro fails to invite the Avengers to his wedding with Crystal because he's fighting with Wanda and is deemed an "arrogant, posturing fool" by the Inhumans, we're told that Gorgon has "endured a great deal from Quicksilver...for many months." There's only one problem with that, in the blink and you'll miss it Pietro appearances that happen between The Avengers (1963) #110 and the current issue- (Marvel Team-Up (1972) #11 and The Incredible Hulk (1968) #175) We have seen Pietro be nothing but helpful to the Inhumans. And we have seen his help and expertise ignored when it comes to enemies he has fought previously. We have no indications whatsoever that Pietro has been anything but loving and focused on Crystal. It should also be noted that when Gorgon finds out that Pietro didn't invite the Avengers he starts nearly destroying Avengers Tower.

At the wedding, we learn that CRYSTAL HAS INVITED HER EX-BOYFRIEND, JOHNNY STORM, TO HER AND PIETRO'S WEDDING. Johnny is very much a mature adult about things and tells Crystal that if she's happy, he's happy for her. Which is great and lovely and another tick on the box for why I'm a Johnny Storm fan BUT-

The Fantastic Four (1961) #150A-B

Crystal is about to get married and is now suddenly confused about if she's happy or not? That little vague anxiety is never resolved in this wedding arc and in Fantastic Four (1961) #150B, Pietro and Crystal are married. But even the comic is aware that readers might not be thinking this is a happy ending and have an entire panel dedicated to trying to convince you this is happy.

The Fantastic Four (1961) #150A-B

Regardless, these early Pietro/Crystal appearances offer us even more insight into the bigotry on New Attilan. At the beginning of The Avengers (1963) #127, we're told that Black Bolt (who cannot speak) has issued a number of reforms meant to create equality between ALL Inhumans. But upon our first looks at the Alphas, the former slaves of the Inhumans, we see that they're talking of genocide. The genocide mention isn't really resolved here either.

We find out in Fantastic Four (1961) #158 that Pietro marrying Crystal was not enough for him to gain acceptance among his wife's people but that he had to be made an Inhuman by special decree. And yet- Pietro is chained and is willing to die for the Inhumans. "I am an Inhuman since the day of my marriage. From that day until forever, I will live or die- an Inhuman!" This is a sharp contrast to Pietro's issues with the concept of mutant identity that have previously been expressed in: Avengers (1963) #16, Uncanny X-Men (1963) #27, Avengers (1963) #45-49, and Uncanny X-Men (1963) #43A-45A. It's safe to assume that part of Pietro's undying and unearned loyalty to the Inhumans is based around his rushed relationship with Crystal.

I've mentioned above that I don't think Pietro didn't see the red flags, but that he might be colorblind and I'm going to go a little further into that here. Pietro falls in love with Crystal because she is kind to him and nurses him back to health and he's obviously very attracted to her. Crystal falls in love with Pietro while he is unconscious and dependent on her. Even though Pietro is aware that he's essentially Crystal's side-piece in this whole relationship kerfuffle from Fantastic Four (1961) #131-132, he's emboldened by the fact that Crystal chose him. Pietro struggles with self-worth issues (we can see these manifested as well in those mutant identity issues listed above) despite his bluster and pride, and we can see some of that desire and craving to be picked, to be worthy, to be loved, come through in The Amazing Spider-Man (1963) #71. But we've also seen so far, how Pietro's loyalty and love for these people who "picked him" by virtue of their princess "falling in love" with him, is largely one-sided as the Inhumans do NOT share his sentiments.

Case in point for Pietro's feelings and attachment to Cyrstal.

The Fantastic Four (1961) #159

Pietro interacts with the Avengers again in Avengers (1963) #137 where he's informed of Wanda's marriage to Vision and is asked to return to the Avengers and leave Crystal because of that marriage. It doesn't go as planned for the Avengers and Pietro refuses. He's putting Crystal above his old friends and family, and we're seeing that he's been interacting more with Crystal's friends and family than his own since they've gotten together.

With the advent of Inhumans (1975) Pietro starts to vocally realize that maybe... just maybe...the Inhumans don't like him very much. And Crystal tries to convince him otherwise.

Inhumans (1975) #3

A few issues pass, Pietro and Crystal are held for ransom, Pietro barely talks at all, Black Bolt screams and destroys the Great Refuge- and then randomly and all of a sudden, Crystal and Pietro are placed as regents of New Attilan? But even with this regency, it's clear that the Inhumans don't like Pietro. Crystal thinks that Pietro is "beyond reason" for questioning Black Bolt and the way that the Inhumans interpret his silence as royal edict. When Pietro makes solid points about how Black Bolt doesn't talk so he can't say anything.

Inhumans (1975) #7

And then in Inhumans (1975) #12, Crystal asks Pietro why he doesn't trust their new leader, and he speaks of the man's lust for power and Crystal goes "well even if his motives suck, he's making progress." She doesn't really take the time to even think through Pietro's point of view, instead meeting him with a "hope you're wrong." Spoiler alert- Pietro was not wrong as we discover in The Fantastic Four (1961) # Annual 12. And even in that issue, where Crystal is telling the FF about how Pietro was right and how valiantly he fought to ensure the safety of the Inhumans against one who only wanted power- she refers to him as "not a true Inhuman," and in the same breath refers to herself as "I, his loyal wife." And in this same issue Pietro even says, echoing Crystal's earlier wording (which he wasn't even around to hear), "I may not be a true Inhuman, but these people are now my family and no one gets away with killing them." He's continuing to position the Inhumans and particularly the Inhuman royal family as his family, while they continue to keep a distance between them, with his wife referring to him as not a true Inhuman, and others making it clear that he is merely tolerated due to his marriage to Crystal.

Crystal isn't completely without merit here though, her words definitely shine light on one part of her thoughts on her husband, but she also shows extreme care for him and prioritizes finding him over the rest of her family when he's captured in The Fantastic Four (1961) # Annual 12. This does however fall into her growing pattern of caring for Pietro more when he's dependent on her than when he's able to make his own choices.

And then, at the end of The Fantastic Four (1961) # Annual 12, we see Crystal grab Johnny Storm's face, look like she's about to kiss him (while giving him "fuck me" eyes), and tell him that she's never going to stop loving him. Pietro sees them, and Johnny is clearly uncomfortable with Crystal's actions (as he has been this entire issue), and he and Pietro make "peace" despite neither of them being the issue here when Pietro basically tells him that he's okay because he's a friend of Crystal's and hopefully a friend of his too.

The Fantastic Four (1961) # Annual 12

With the dawn of Korvac Saga, we get further confirmation that Pietro is deeply, deeply committed to Crystal. We start The Avengers (1963) #170 with Pietro gazing over New Attilan in a way that's recognized as sad, and then the following exchange happens:

The Avengers (1963) #170

Crystal makes a really great observation about how Pietro's marriage to her has tied him down and changed his life dramatically since his days as an Avenger, but Pietro refutes her concerns saying that what matters to him is that he has her, that he can support her in her place among her people, and is about to say that he'd never leave her when he's teleported elsewhere by agents unknown (at this point in the story at least ;)). This is literally the healthiest their relationship has been to date.

At some point after the Korvac Saga, Pietro rejoins the Avengers, sort of- he's an Avenger again for like a single issue, the whole rejoining thing happens off page, and then come Avengers (1963) #181, he's been kicked off the team and then passes out. In reality we find out that Pietro's soul has been stolen by Django Maximoff who has imprisoned his and Wanda's souls in wooden puppets of themselves. Pietro and Wanda go on a soul-searching journey with Django to discover the truth about their childhoods, learn more about their parentage and then return to Attilan.

It's on Attilan in The Avengers (1963) #188, that Pietro finds out he is going to be a father.

The Avengers (1963) #188

Following the pregnancy announcement, in Marvel Two-in-One (1974) #71, is the first time we see an Inhuman who isn't Crystal be spontaneously kind/nice to Pietro when Gorgon and Karnak invite Pietro to play a game with them. Crystal is also heavily pregnant in this comic so it's safe to assume that some time has passed and that as the pregnancy has continued the Inhumans have warmed some to Pietro's presence among them. With the importance we've seen them place on blood ties and Inhuman genetics in particular, this makes a lot of sense as Pietro is now not just married-in to the family, but is the father of the new member of the royal family.

The next time we see Pietro and Crystal is during Fantastic Four (1961) #239-240, where Pietro has become the sole defender of Attilan in a time of war when all of the Inhumans have come down with a mystery illness. During this time, Pietro continues to be extremely devoted to Crystal and deeply concerned about her health and the safety of their unborn child.

The Fantastic Four (1961) #239

During this great conflict when it seems to be resolved in Fantastic Four (1961) #240, we get another glimpse into the racism in Attilan. The Inhumans freeing those they formerly enslaved is described here as a "mistake," a "failure," and a "noble experiment." The Alphas are still inherently described as being "mindless drones" and as "less-than-human."

The Fantastic Four (1961) #240

It is into this continued dehumanization of the non-Inhuman on Attilan that Luna Maximoff is born. And Luna, is fundamentally not Inhuman nor Mutant at the time of her birth. But for now, Pietro is just concerned with his wife and daughter's health. He looks like the Grinch, but he's happy and that's what matters.

The Fantastic Four (1961) #240

Pietro's bond with Wanda has been repaired and his anger against Vision for existing has dissipated by the events of Vision and the Scarlet Witch (1982) #4, where Pietro encourages Vision to hold his daughter. We get a really great moment of seeing that Crystal and Wanda have started to form a friendship and that Pietro's two families (the one with his sister, and the one with his wife) are becoming closer.

Vision and the Scarlet Witch (1982) #4

But this is where things start to get a little dicey. Magneto, having recently discovered that he is the father of Pietro and Wanda, has now sought them out on Attilan (now moved to the moon) and is determined to try to once again get his children to join his Brotherhood of Evil Mutants (he's not picking up on the message they keep putting down smh). And throughout this fight, Wanda, Pietro, and Erik all make it clear that Erik has severely mistreated his children and that still, knowing he is their father, he is willing to harm and even kill them. Crystal is there- she is witness to this.

Vision and the Scarlet Witch (1982) #4

And what does Crystal do? But let Magneto hold the baby, before Magneto has even revealed himself to be Pietro's father.

Vision and the Scarlet Witch (1982) #4

Within the pages of Vision and the Scarlet Witch we don't really get to see Pietro's whole reaction to this incredibly traumatizing series of events, but never fear, Wanda recounts more of the story in Avengers (1963) #234 (TW- G slur).

Avengers (1963) #234

Again, all of this is happening in front of Crystal. There is absolutely no way she gets out of this conversation without the knowledge that Pietro and Wanda have been horribly abused by their father and that Pietro is on some level afraid of turning into Magneto and is aware of the temper he shares with the older man and has been actively combating it. It would be reasonable to think that Pietro might need time to process this information.

When we next see Pietro and Crystal it is during a battle on Attilan against the Avengers in Avengers (1963) # Annual 12, inspired by Maximus. Maximus is spared, as always, because Black Bolt loves him too much to actually do anything about the consistent and ever present threat the man poses to the safety and security of their people. (This is a surprise tool that will come back to bite them in the ass). And once again, this issue presents the Alphas as Maximus' allies, continuing to have the formerly enslaved be shown as enemies of the "good" Inhumans.

Pietro and Crystal's relationship goes from bad to worse in The Thing (1983) #3. In this comic, Pietro wishes to partake of his right as an Inhuman father and in the fashion of the Inhumans, his adopted people, expose Luna to the Terrigan mists to spark forth her Inhuman abilities- Crystal does not agree. Crystal brings in Ben Grimm (The Thing) to stop Pietro from following her people's customs in regard to their child, and sends her dog, Lockjaw (who is technically an Inhuman himself but that's never really explored?) to teleport the baby away from Pietro. Crystal's reasoning for not wanting to expose Luna to the mists? She's afraid her daughter will become ugly.

No seriously, that's the reason. Pietro is worried about his daughter's life as one who is both mutant and Inhuman, what her humanity will bring her among her two super-powered peoples. Crystal is worried about her looks. Pietro acquiesces to his wife's wishes following the testimony of their dog/friend(?) and Ben Grimm and is thoroughly painted in the wrong for wanting to raise his daughter as an Inhuman among Inhumans. At least the rest of the royal family was on his side this time?

Anyway, let's remember that Lockjaw is a person and has been a person this whole time and then think back on how Crystal has treated him. Based on Ben and Pietro's reactions to Lockjaw speaking it's also pretty clear that nobody who isn't an Inhuman was aware that Lockjaw was a person and not a dog......anyway....

The Thing (1983) #3

We get a completely different idea of Pietro's feelings towards the Inhumans in Marvel Fanfare (1982) #14B than what we've seen previously. In this issue, Pietro is openly critical of the bread and circus approach the Inhumans take with their ruling, and in a shocking turn of events from the last 20+ issues, explicitly says "I'm no Inhuman, and I give no obeisance to Black Bolt...or to your foolish traditions." Pietro is accused of stealing a royal scepter because he made a comment about not being a monarchist (based) and is lured into a trap by someone he thought was his friend who he has had to twice this issue turn down a proposition for sex from.

Marvel Fanfare (1982) #14B* *editorial says this issue takes place before Attilan is moved to the moon, however, Luna's birth occurred after the fateful move and she was named for the move which puts the actual chronology of this issue in question, but I'm keeping it here for an easy publication order chronology

We get a clear image, even clearer than it's been in the past that the Inhumans hate Pietro for...not being an Inhuman.

Do we all remember when Crystal literally brought in people who aren't even related to her child to stop Pietro from exposing Luna to the Terrigan mists because she might turn ugly? We all remember this? Okay great- because she's now adopted Pietro's anxieties in Avengers (1963) #243.

The Avengers (1963) #243

And though Crystal apparently doesn't trust Pietro's parenting choices she's come around to his same anxieties about Luna's human-ness. Pietro tries to support her and then she goes "well none of us have experience with a human baby, what if we just.... didn't deal with that and hired a nanny." And Pietro goes along with it, trying to track down Bova, his minotaur-esque nursemaid from his own childhood who he's only just learned about and has met but once.

We see Crystal and Pietro together again during the wedding of Black Bolt and Medusa, in Fantastic Four (1961) # Annual 18. Where we see Pietro brooding over the wedding festivities. Here we learn that Pietro was given no role in his sister-in-law's wedding and that he is still continuously feeling like an outsider, despite all of the efforts we've seen him take in past appearances to be as much of an Inhuman as possible he is still kept at arms length even by these he considers family. Even Reed Richards (Mr. Fantastic) wonders at the differences between Pietro and Crystal's wedding and the wedding of Black Bolt and Medusa- and Reed wonders if the difference can't be attributed to the fact that Crystal chose to marry someone who was not an Inhuman. And it's a fair question. Pietro even asks Crystal if it's okay that he and their daughter stand beside her during the wedding.

The Fantastic Four (1961) # Annual 18

In Vision and the Scarlet Witch (1985) #5, we see that Pietro has decided to introduce human traditions to the Inhumans with trick or treat, and that he plans to take Luna on her rounds, Crystal along with them of course.

Vision and the Scarlet Witch (1985) #5

Then in Vision and the Scarlet Witch (1985) #6 (that fateful Thanksgiving with the surprise Magneto appearance), we begin to see some strife between husband and wife. According to Crystal, she is "used to being alone." (She is literally a princess in a close-knit family who didn't even stop dating Johnny Storm to start dating her now-husband). And she adds that.

Vision and the Scarlet Witch (1985) #6

The militia, being something Pietro had discussed with Wanda briefly in #5, is a new responsibility of his entrusted to him by the Inhumans. He is now responsible for training a militia intended for the protection of Attilan. It's the first real job he's had since getting with Crystal and the moment he has responsibilities and focuses outside of her, she's not happy. Also yes, Luna does look like a Renaissance baby in this panel.

A month later, in Vision and the Scarlet Witch (1985) #7, we discover that Crystal, who started her relationship with Pietro by cheating on her then-boyfriend, is now cheating on her current husband.

Vision and the Scarlet Witch (1985) #7

Now, I've shown you all the lead-up there is to her cheating. I've covered all of the Pietro and Crystal interactions, and touched base with every major Crystal appearance leading up to this. There isn't any rhyme or reason to this aside from, Pietro has a job and he's doing it. And beyond this, as we move into #8, we learn that Crystal is planning on spending more time on Earth, and from Pietro's perspective it's to spend time with Wanda, but really it's to cheat on him. Once again, the militia (Pietro's job) is very much cited as the reason for this.

Vision and the Scarlet Witch (1985) #8

While Pietro runs off with Wanda, Vision, and Luke Cage to make sure that Wanda is safe for the duration of her pregnancy (it's a demon thing, Scarlet Witch stuff y'know?), we discover that Crystal is taking this opportunity to cheat on her husband again.

Vision and the Scarlet Witch (1985) #8

Crystal's affair goes on for MONTHS, and even her boyfriend is more worried about what all this is doing to Pietro than she is. She overdoses on anti-pollution potion in order to continue to see her boyfriend, and Pietro spends the vast majority of his time at her bedside frantically trying to get someone to wake her up in deep concern for her wellbeing.

In #10, Crystal calls out her boyfriend's name in her sleep, confessing to the affair, and Pietro tries to kill him. He's stopped by Vision and the Inhumans, and then tries to rally his militia against Norm the real estate agent, the man who has stolen his wife's affections. Wanda confronts Norm and he gives her a sad speech about how Pietro is "neglectful" of his wife's needs and ends it with "I'm not making excuses for deceiving you, but you like your brother better than a lot of people do." Essentially saying "It's okay that she cheated on Pietro, because he's Pietro." Wanda then talks to Crystal's spirit and Crystal says "I cheated on Pietro! I'd do it again!"

Pietro and Vision talk and Pietro comments on how Crystal doesn't allow him to pursue any of his own interests, which tracks with what we've seen that now that Pietro is spending time with the militia she's determined him neglectful and is using it as justification to cheat on him. Throughout all of this too, the Inhumans confirm to Pietro that they think lesser of him because he isn't one of them.

Pietro decides that he can't take Crystal back after this betrayal of his trust (fair and reasonable) to which Crystal calls him a "self-righteous pig" and even Wanda insists that he must take her back because he loves her. And in issue #11, Vision claims that Pietro has "run out on his wife" and Wanda thinks poorly of him for establishing a boundary of not wanting to be around a woman who cheated on him. Meanwhile, Pietro is having a mental breakdown about the fact that nobody actually loves him and that the loyalty he shows to others is not reciprocated.

Vision and the Scarlet Witch (1985) #11

And rounding us out in #12, Crystal tells Norm that she wants to keep seeing him and celebrates the fact that if Pietro stays away for a bit longer she'll be granted a divorce.

Here ends part 1 of the meta (stopping close to image limit at a good rest point) and I'll reblog this post with even more commentary at a later date!

Reading List so far:

The Fantastic Four (1961) #131-132 The Avengers (1963) #110 The Incredible Hulk (1968) #175 The Avengers (1963) #127 The Fantastic Four (1961) #150A-B <- Wedding Issue The Fantastic Four (1961) #158-159 The Avengers (1963) #137 Inhumans (1975) #3, 7, 12 The Fantastic Four (1961) # Annual 12 Avengers (1963) #170, 188 The Fantastic Four (1961) #239-240 Vision and the Scarlet Witch (1982) #2, 4 The Avengers (1963) #234, Annual 12 The Thing (1983) #3 Marvel Fanfare (1982) #14B Avengers (1963) #243 The Fantastic Four (1961) # Annual 18 Vision and the Scarlet Witch (1985) #5-12

#pietro maximoff #quicksilver #magnet family #wanda maximoff #scarlet witch #the inhumans #inhumans #crystalia amaquelin #crystal amaquelin #crystal #comic meta

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skania · 9 months ago

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AquaKane & OnK 148

Ohhhhh boy. I thought we would have to wait until July to get back to Aqua and Akane, so this chapter blindsided me lol

I know that the most on-the-nose reading of this chapter is that Aka is preparing to pull the classic romcom trope where the love interest gives up on the MC only so the rest of the cast can reassure her that she is the one who makes the MC happy, etc. etc. Considering that this is happening two chapters after Aqua told Kana that he has fun with her, it's like Aka is leading us all to believe that's where it's going. It's all very tropey and in-your-face and perfectly on brand with the way Aka has always written that particular ship.

So instead of talking about the obvious, I'd like to indulge my hopes for good writing and discuss the possibility of Aka actually subverting those tropes by playing this straight, regardless of how likely or unlikely it may be. Because if he does, then all of the stuff I've always loved about Aqua and Akane may just end up meaning something.

This is the possibility I'm rooting for against all odds after all, so I figure that I may as well go down throwing my ship the hurrahs it deserves while I can still do so lol

So buckle up because this is going to be long!

This chapter is a wild ride because it touches upon a lot of different things at once.

First, Aqua supposedly didn't want to be involved with Akane any longer in order to keep her safe.

However, when Akane announced that she would stop his plans — in other words, that she would stay involved in his life — Aqua looked giddy.

Look at him. When Aka allows him to actually emote and be an actual character, Aqua can be so funny!

True to form, in this chapter we see Akane come up to him and Aqua just... welcome her. In fact, he even asks her if she feels awkward around him. Instead of acting like they never dated (which is exactly what Akane has been doing, mind you), he himself brings their former relationship to the forefront.

There's a pause splitting his question in two, meaning that this is something Aqua hesitates to ask. Almost like he is scared of the reply. Or like he may be feeling a little awkward himself.

Which is no surprise, because that is how Aka himself presents their current era. Akane isn't just Akane and she isn't just a friend; she is Aqua's ex girlfriend, a title that never fails to bring attention to the fact that they used to be romantically involved.

From colleagues, to a fake couple, to partners, to a real couple and now they're in their Exes era. I've been waiting for Aka to explore all the tension and complexity that should bring, but he's been kind of busy off-paneling most things Aqua. Alas!

When I commented on Chapter 131, I mentioned that (to me) it feels like after Chapter 116, Akane found something to focus on. She isn't thinking about her relationship with Aqua, the only thing she has in mind is Aqua. Keeping him safe, helping him achieve happiness.

Even here during this chapter, she goes to him to ease his loneliness and remind him that he has people worth living for and that he deserves to be happy, but... nothing she says includes her. It's all about Aqua and the others, the others and Aqua.

I don't think it's a coincidence that Akane walks away from him with her eyes closed. Her mind is consumed with thoughts about wanting Aqua to be happy, and so she doesn't even notice the way he turns to look at her retreating back.

Until Kana shines her proverbial light on her, making Akane open her eyes.

The way the chapter is structured, it's like Kana is there to give Akane the answer — the missing piece to solve the Aqua Happiness Conundrum™ that Akane is so focused on. It's easy to think that the answer is predictably Kana herself, but since I'm here for Aqua and Akane, I'd like to believe the answer can be just as Kana says.

After all, who is prominently featured in what Aqua considers to be his happy days?

Kana's words are abrupt, yes, but the silver lining is that they reflect what Aqua himself has already told us.

Akane is front and center in what Aqua has come to know as happiness.

One may wonder: How TF does Kana know that though?? And it's a fair question that I'll talk about in a little bit, but maybe what matters most is that she knows it at all.

In a way, it feels almost like meta commentary. Like the story has finally reached the point where Aka can afford to go back to Aqua and Akane, and so he is getting ready to reap all the seeds he sowed during the previous arcs fingers crossed.

And this is the very first one of those seeds: Aqua was happy with Akane, but Akane never let herself think that she played an instrumental part in his happiness. She seems to think that it was just being freed from his revenge.

I'd even argue this right here was the true reason of their downfall. It wasn't Aqua finding out about the loophole and Akane not coming clean, it was the reason why she didn't come clean.

Aqua's happiness mattered so much to her that Akane failed to consider that risking her life for him was the last thing Aqua wanted.

So when I read the leaks and Kana's comment, my kneejerk reaction was to think Finally! because this could be setting in motion something I've been waiting for all along.

For Aqua and Akane to revisit their dynamic, their relationship, and come clean about what they mean to each other — wherever that may lead them.

Now, going back to Kana and that earlier question of how does she know? Perhaps she saw something we haven't been privy to (in classic Aka fashion). Or maybe it's as simple as Kana finally realizing that Aqua is deeply unwell, and knowing that the last time she saw him happy was back when he was dating Akane.

Considering the information Kana has and — especially — all the information she lacks, it's not far-fetched for her to come to the conclusion that Aqua's state is partly to blame on his break-up with Akane.

Once again, it would be easy for Aka to say that Kana got it wrong because she doesn't know anything about Aqua's revenge. But wouldn't it be ironic if Kana's lack of insight into that particular side of Aqua is what allows her to see something so simple that the very parties involved are missing it?

Regardless of the road she took to get there, I'd like to think the manga has given us enough reasons to believe Kana is not quite wrong.

After all, Aqua didn't get his black stars when he found out that his father was alive. It wasn't finding out about his father's identity that did it, either.

It was turning his back on Akane and on the naive thoughts of being happy in order to walk down the Revenge Road, on a chapter aptly titled "Going Astray", that gave Aqua his two black stars.

If that was the chapter where Aqua stepped away from the "correct path", so to speak, then it stands to reason to believe that Akane may be front and center in the path Aqua is meant to take.

Coincidentally, this was the last interaction Aqua and Akane were allowed to have before this chapter.

Another thing I find very important in c148 is the way Kana words her realization. Kana isn't telling all of this to Akane as an observer. She's saying it as someone who likes Aqua romantically.

This is in contrast to Akane and Aqua, who are two hot messes when it comes to identifying the nature of their own feelings.

Throughout the entire manga, we've never seen Akane put a label on the way she feels about Aqua. We've seen her realize why she feels the way she does, but we haven't seen her say what she feels, even though Aqua himself has questioned it.

Closest we got was this, and they broke up a chapter later.

Aqua has unexpectedly been more open than Akane in that regard, but... once again, they broke up literally one chapter after Aqua was at his most candid.

And considering everything that happened before and after that, I'm not sure if Akane actually got the message.

But before I get to that, there is an important difference in the way Akane was thinking of Aqua's happiness back then and the way she's thinking about it now.

Chapter 97 was even titled Together. Akane wanted to make Aqua happy, yes, and she also wanted to be together with him always. Just like Aqua wanted them to, according to his own admission: "I don't want to let go of these days... when you're by my side."

But all of that is missing in this most recent chapter. She no longer includes herself as part of the equation at all.

It truly feels like Akane is back to completely underestimating how much she means to Aqua.

Back when Aqua told her this:

Akane reacted like this:

And what is her reaction to Kana's words this chapter?

Every single time, Akane is taken aback by the thought of meaning more to Aqua than she thinks. Every. Single. Time.

This is sad and a little frustrating, but it's far from surprising. After all, this is how Akane has always interpreted their relationship:

As far as Akane is concerned, their relationship was a lie that was turning into truth little by little. She never dared to hope that he loved her back; hell, she even thought that he was attracted to Kana and wondered why he decided to date her instead.

To make matters worse, in Chapter 98, Aqua deliberately set the stage so that Akane's trust in him — the very basis of their relationship — would be broken.

So while Akane realizes that Aqua doesn't want to use her, she may have explained that away as Aqua being his kind self rather than as Aqua harboring any kind of special feelings towards her.

Regardless of how she interpreted his actions though, it seems likely that Akane thinks that she failed him.

She couldn't save him as his girlfriend and Aqua told her he would have nothing to do with her anymore, and so Akane is now trying to save him as something else entirely. Not even as a friend, because she hardly interacts with him at all.

She's trying to save him while staying away just like he wanted her to. While only stepping in when she deems it appropriate and/or necessary.

But is that really and truly what Aqua wants?

Most importantly, is that what Aqua needs?

This chapter suggests that may not be the case, and the rest of the manga agrees. Staying away is not how Akane saved Aqua little by little. This is how she did it:

That's why the way Kana worded her realization is important. It isn't only that Kana — the very girl Akane thought Aqua was attracted to — is bringing romance to the forefront and thus setting the stage for the nature of Akane's (and Aqua's) feelings to be finally cleared up.

It's also that Kana is showing Akane that it's possible to own her feelings while being selfless about his happiness.

After all, the ball right now is in Akane's court. In the state he is now, Aqua would never ever allow himself to chase his own happiness. Even when he thought he was free to do so, he felt that Akane deserved better than to be held back by him.

So all in all, it's like with this chapter alone Aka has laid the groundwork to address all the AquaKane elephants in the room. Just in time for the very season that will be showing AquaKane in all its glory to all the anime-only watchers, at that.

In each of the last arcs, Aqua has reconciled with someone important to him. Kana and Ruby are fully back in his life now, yet he isn't doing any better. Maybe it's finally Akane's turn to try again.

So yes, Kana's change of heart is so abrupt that it may be a red herring leading to a very predictable end.

But since I've made it this far, I may as well keep hoping for the opposite to be true: maybe, just maybe, Aka is planning to tie all of this together and lead it to a satisfying conclusion. I can only hope that is the case, because it's where I feel that the writing is at its best.

Besides, if "giving up on Aqua" and "turning his black star white" are so-called "winning flags", well... Akane did both of those first 😂

#akane kurokawa #aqua hoshino #aquakane #aquaka #my aquakane meta #I was half-tempted to wait until next week because for all I know Aka is going to shoot all of this down in record time #but as I always say: if I've been reading for this long I may as well go down clowning lmao #aka can do whatever he wants but this is the way I'd personally like the manga to go and I'm sticking by it #bring it on aka #I've got both my celebratory and my clown gifs so I'm ready for both outcomes #one thing I forgot to mention is that aqua adresses akane by her first name in this chapter #but that's a post for another time

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ggukalaxy · 2 months ago

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still deep in my "angels before man" brainrot and after reading @nicosraf's tweet about fan-favourite lines and dislking like 75% of his own writing, i can't not share my own favourites with rafa himself and also everyone else so get ready for a long fucking post

(side note: i haven't reread abm yet, so there could potentially be new highlights once i do reread it)

short explanation of what the position of the sticky notes mean:

• on the side of the page means this particular line or paragraph (19 marked)

• at the top on the inside means this page (4 marked)

• at the top on the outside means the entire scene starting from here (15 marked)

also, sometimes i didn't highlight a specific line or paragraph if it's within a page or scene i already marked (because i was running out of sticky notes lol)

let's get to it in chronological order!

1) page 25 to 30:

lucifer's first time flying with baal and his first time bleeding

2) page 49 and 50:

lucifer's first time watching michael fight

3) page 68 to 70:

gabriel telling lucifer about how god created him

4) this paragraph on page 86:

"so far away in the crowd was michael, with that proud grin of his and one hand in the air, but he called out to the youngest angel still. 'lucifer! lucifer!' even with all their distance, their gazes met and locked. an intake of breath, then the exuberant shout: 'lucifer—the lord has never made as fine an angel as you!'"

5) page 105 and 106:

michael and lucifer finally actually meeting

6) this paragraph on page 106:

"michael seemed to hesitate, before he turned to lucifer, and they were facing each other, seeing one another, for the first time since that day years ago when lucifer had led all of heaven in worship. up close, finally — lucifer felt all of himself melt like precious metal into a cast. 'you know my name,' michael said, and his voice had a mellow reverb to it. 'that's a shame. i wanted to introduce myself.' lucifer opened his mouth, but michael was grinning; it revealed little dips in his cheeks. 'i am michael, archangel of god, angel of strength.'"

(i was giggling and kicking my feet at this point, i love this moment so much i could scream)

7) page 107 to 113:

michael's and lucifer's first conversation with one another, right after that wonderful introduction above <3

8) michael saying this to lucifer on page 121 and 122:

"'that was a gallery? for art? i suppose it's no surprise that's where i found you then.'"

9) page 127 to 131:

god telling a story about a pure dove that dirties itself while lucifer is thinking about michael

10) michael saying this to lucifer on page 135:

"'(...) but i canceled it. i canceled all the plans i had for this.'"

11) michael to lucifer on page 147:

"'when i asked of you, angels said to me that your beauty was so great, one could take a glance, but never stare. (...) i learned that their words were true. when we wrestle, when we spend time together — the pain you give me is indescribable.'"

12) this paragraph on page 151:

"he discovered himself wanting to be afraid, feeling that he should be, knowing he should taste distress like his first visit to the bathhouse, but lucifer could still hear michael's words from when they had bathed. he thought of thorns, remembered those in his hands so long ago. the prince's eyes were shut; lucifer thought of tracing the bridge of his nose, his mouth, with his index, to see if he would prick him."

13) page 152:

lucifer and michael on earth, touching each other on their last day there

14) this paragraph on page 156:

"(...) but his hands went to lucifer's warm cheeks and, in a quick swoop, he planted his lips against lucifer's forehead; then he did it again, and again, pressing one kiss after another until he had done perhaps more than a dozen."

15) page 168 to 171:

lucifer and michael in lucifer's room, in front of his mirror

(lucifer's questions about why some things are the way they are... michael almost worshipping lucifer in front of their reflection... all the touches between them... oh i'm about to go feral—)

16) michael to lucifer on page 169:

"'for you, i wouldn't mind a little pain'"

17) page 177:

lucifer falling asleep in michael's bed without michael even being home

18) this paragraph on page 180:

"this, this here could be worship. "this—" lucifer pressed an innocent kiss to the prince's sweet, divine mouth. this could be religion."

19) page 181 to 183:

the interlude

(do i even have to say more? do i really have to go into detail about just how beautiful it is, and how every line sounds like poetry? i want to carve every word, every letter, into my skin, so deep that it reaches my bones, and stays with me long after i lose my flesh and soul)

20) these lines on page 201:

"the prince was grinning, waving him over, then offering open arms. when they embraced, it was tight, one of lucifer's hands going to michael's curls of hair and clutching it like an object once lost returned now to be cherished again; and the prince put his face up against the warmth of lucifer's neck and breathed low, hot."

21) page 210 to 216:

michael begging lucifer to stay with him, and then uriel showing up and just the entire conversation between him and michael, and him and lucifer

22) this paragraph on page 210:

"'simply my beloved.' michael smiled back, grand but sleepy, before he swung up to sit again. he shuffled closer to lucifer and chuckled warm, perhaps at the confusion on the other's irises and brows and mouth. 'my beloved lucifer.'"

23) michael to lucifer on page 211:

"'i think i'd like you to be the first thing i see when i wake.'"

24) page 250 to 253:

lucifer and michael touching each other, feeling each other

(i'm so weak for moments like these oh my god i could read a thousand pages just about every time these two even breathed in each other's direction)

25) this line on page 251:

"'i feel drunk,' michael murmured against him, then shuddered. 'your mouth— when you were created, your lips must have been laced with liquor.'"

26) these lines on page 253:

""we were over the flowers, and you touched me, remade me. (...) i want to be yours, your angel. angel of love, angel of michael.""

27) page 278 to 281:

lucifer cutting himself open

28) page 302 to 308:

lucifer trying to have sex with michael, and michael refusing

29) michael to lucifer on page 302:

"'don't make me say such embarrassing, affectionate things, beloved lucifer. but, let me say that — before i saw you on the street, dancing and singing, i was never very joyous. i was content with serving father, i felt i had no room to complain, but then you arrived. and being around you, i had so much joy i became irrational, and now — now, it's all spilling out. you make my heart swell and rise, like smoke."

30) michael to lucifer on page 303:

"'and suddenly i'm questioning everything, asking myself if this is really paradise, or if you are paradise.'"

31) lucifer to michael on page 304:

"'haven't you ever wondered why father is so strict about our subservience? it's because disobedience is creation. create with me, michael, and let's call it sin.'"

32) page 327:

lucifer finally losing his shit

33) page 328 to 330:

lucifer's speech about god being cruel and how angels are also good and deserve better

(just realized i didn't highlight this scene when i first read it and i'm honestly questioning myself right now because that whole speech and everything lucifer says is so fucking real)

34) page 340 to 344:

the moment michael disagrees with lucifer about the end of heaven and the end of god

35) michael to lucifer on page 344:

"'you're everything to me, the stars and the moons, the heat and the cold, the earth and the seeds, the waters and the flowers, but you are not god.'"

(also apparently didn't highlight this one and now i'm one hundred percent sure i ran out of sticky notes in that moment and told myself i'd do it later and ended up forgetting about it because this line absolutely broke me)

36) this paragraph on page 361:

"but the sword never made contact; a golden chain shot out from somewhere, grappled his entire body, flung him downwards. and lucifer, frozen, kicking, screaming — he saw michael suddenly above him (...). lucifer felt the tears land upon his own cheeks, as if they were his own."

(cut me open. let me bleed to death. break my ribs and crush my heart inbetween your fingers. it would hurt less than michael crying while hurting lucifer.)

37) page 362 to 367:

michael destroying lucifer on god's orders, cutting off his wings, and lucifer being damned

38) michael to lucifer on page 364:

"'apologize, i'm begging you, lucifer, stop, i can't do this— i don't want to lose you—'"

(just reading this again made me dry sob)

39) the last paragraph on page 367:

"the angels wept at their punishment — michael, between them all, his tears morphing into crystals, slicing down his cheeks and making him bleed."

40) page 369:

the little bits about the fallen angels finding lucifer on earth and how he loves them

so uhh yeah it's definitely safe to say that abm is literally my new favourite book now and i've been thinking about it every single day since i finished it a bit over a month ago and i find pieces of lucifer and of michael in every song i hear or every other story i read and i'll never get over them or over how good this book and the writing style is

@nicosraf seriously thank you so much for writing it and sharing it with the world, i will treasure it till the day i die

#angels before man #rafael nicolás #moocifer #spoilers obviously #quotes #favourite scenes

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breathlesswordsbloodyknees · 3 months ago

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On Maiar forms and "nullification"

Okay, I’m staying home to ease the stress of waiting for the result of Baby’s First HR Report and don’t want to think about it, so have some more meta. Expanding on these posts, part one and part two.

A deeper interpretation on this quote from Ósanwe-kenta, Vinyar Tengwar #39: “they(Maiar) became wedded to the forms of their evil deeds, and if these bodies were taken from them or destroyed, they were nullified until they had rebuilt a semblance of their former habitations.”

“they became wedded to the forms of their evil deeds": This, I kind of struggle with. I don't think it's a simple as they do evil deeds, they get stuck in their forms. But I also don't think it's as easy as they enjoy their form and their deeds so much that they're "wedded". Some secret third thing. Interesting word choice there though. (sauron’s underlying “give me your troth" vibe every time he talks about the Rings echoes here imo but i have absolute brain rot about these two)

"and if these bodies were taken from them or destroyed" This for me is Jack Lowden Sauron in Forodwaith, the one that gets betrayed by Adar, kitten ears and all (I gotta find that tweet). He's literally at the height of his power (for that age, though Lowden Sauron plays it with a air of uncertainty, the shot of him taking a breath and looking up at the crown after he kneels) and he gets cast down from great heights.

"they were nullified" I think you could take this a few different ways, but my theory is that Lowden Sauron's prideful evil overlord vibe is broken by his downfall and he slithers into the form of a low man. It's bed-rotting, really, wrapping yourself in a tattered blanket while you try to ignore the world and your mistakes.

And there’s textual evidence for Sauron having repented after Morgoth’s fall. It’s referenced insubstantially in the Silmarillion, as a “some say” type story. Sauron “repents in fear” “lingers on Middle-earth” “beginning with fair motives”.

This concept is expanded on and solidified more in Letter 131, where Tolkien is trying to get the SIlmarillion published alongside lotr. He more or less says because of Mairon’s origin, Maia of light and beauty and perfection, Sauron was capable of loving or understanding other individual beings. But this was “correspondingly weaker” than his evil schemes, becoming “the sole object of his will, and an end, the End, itself” (“I see the end, Celebrimbor. So clearly. I have seen it from the moment I awoke. But his end…It was different than mine.” he spits out like he’s willing it to be true)

“until they had rebuilt a semblance of their former habitations.” So in a less-than-forgiving-for-the-nuances view, it’s Tolkien saying they’re evil and they’re gonna keep being evil. Rebuilding his former habitations to me has been Sauron’s steps in S2. What he did to Celebrimor, to Mirdania. Manipulation, cold calculation, violence. All he's ever know under Morgoth, dominance and submission, unrelenting. Old habits die hard.

And what he did to Galadriel. I have a lot of thoughts on how the fight in the finale played out. She’s a formidable warrior, Commander of the Northern Armies, giving it her all, she’s skilled. But he’s an ancient spiritual being, having been awoken since before the breaking of the First Silence. He’s eerily silent, parrying her grunts of effort with ease, doing his sick moves with the crown. He's smooth glass on a lake, but he's having fun. At least until she rebukes him, “The door is shut.”

Then, his composure slips. She has denied him. His blows are vicious now, personal. He’s exerting as much effort as she is. (he fucking growls I stgggg) He’s attacking now, not just playing around, culminating in a brute yell as he strikes for her neck. His expression when she cuts his cheekbone, rage has taken over. (You cut Mairon? You cut his perfect cheek? Stabbing for Galadriel! Blood bond for 1000 years!!)

And the stabbing. (i’m still gnawing on every bit of that scene, it’s what finally made me pick up the show) The stalwart defiance bleeds from her face, her eyes flutter, then are drawn to the crown inside her. The moment stretches between them, the music goes quiet. She knows, has known, that he’s evil. She’s seen the bodies, has seen the ruin, has sworn her oath. She's no silly schoolgirl. But in all his overlording terror, she never really thought…never really thought deep down that he would hurt her, at least not like this.

And from his face, searching her eyes almost frantically, neither did he.

One more step away from Halbrand, from Mairon. One more step back to Sauron, to Gorthaur.

But then he twists the crown (that shouldn’t be as hot to me as it is) and at her gasp, his eyes widen, he exhales. There’s a greedy glint of fascination in his eyes, a slight upturn of the lips. Almost like he’s lost himself in playing her pain "like a harp", exquisite beauty for him to revel in. This is it, for me. He’s rebuilding a semblance of his former habitations, he’s back on the path to evil. It's his "fine, make me your villain" moment. I'll be the monster you think I am. (i think we’ll see some straying though. a girl can hope)

#haladriel #saurondriel #maiar #meta #the rings of power #rings of power season 2 #trop spoilers #tolkien #middle earth #tolkien meta #rings of power meta #sauron

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topazadine · 7 months ago

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Let's do another spicy writing take, one that is going to get a lot of people very mad. However, please note that I am saying this out of love and concern. This is not an attack on you personally or on your writing process.

Take a deep breath, prepare to listen with an open mind. Alright. Here goes:

Stop starting a million WIPs.

I am serious. Please. Do not do that. Do not start a million WIPs.

Why? Because then you won't get any of them done. And why is that? Because you'll lose motivation, get distracted, and hop on to the next thing, leaving a trail of heartbreak in your wake.

I have 131 stories on Archive of Our Own and have written over 2 million words of fiction. Two. Million. Words.

Don't believe me? Look.

And then there's more that is not accounted for here: a 110k novel, another 109k novel, and a 20k novelette, along with my current WIP which is currently around 10k. All told, I have written approximately 2,084,000 words.

Are they all perfect? No, of course not, especially the older stuff. But is it done? Yep.

And I did that by doing each project one at a time.

If I get another story idea while I'm in the middle of another story, I write a note in my WIP list, but I don't start it. Only when I'm letting a story "rest" before editing do I start outlining another book, but I still don't start. I wait until I've finished one entire project before I do another one.

Your brain does not actually multitask. Our brains aren't wired to do that. This article from Forbes explains:

You are highly unlikely to be part of that 2.5% even if you think you are. I'm not, and you're probably not either.

What you are really doing is task switching. Take it from the software management program Asana:

That article from Forbes elaborates:

And it is even worse when you are hopping from one WIP to another, essentially changing contexts.

Pleexy, another task automation company, continues by discussing 'context switching':

Every time you stop working on one WIP, you are switching contexts and pulling yourself out of the world you have created, jumping into another. Now your brain is struggling to reorient itself, and it's not going to do its best work.

"But I love writing different WIPs and I get some of them done!"

I am sure you do, but is it your best effort? Would you have been able to write faster, more coherently, better, if you had only worked on one? Probably. And don't you want to do your best?

"But I have ideas and if I don't do them right now I'll forget them!!!"

Then write them down. I have a whole WIP list of things I am intending to write later. Make a notepad document, a spreadsheet, whatever, for your different WIPs.

When you think of something interesting for that project, put down a small note underneath it, but don't start writing! Your brain will let it marinate and when you're done with your current project, you'll have a better idea of what to do with it.

I like to visualize things before bed, so a lot of the time, I will use that visualization for a different project as my way to calm down, but I'm not devoting too much attention to it before I'm ready to work. I've got some scenes and images that I have daydreamed about, but I haven't drawn attention away from my current WIP by actually beginning to write.

This way, I can devote all of my brainpower to my current project while reserving a little bit of attention and aspiration for the next one. I also avoid writer's block because I have my next WIP lined up, waiting for me, and I can transition to it almost immediately.

Generally, I don't go more than a few days without starting a new project (after completing one!!!!!) because I am prepared for it: I can give it my full attention. There's no sitting around and waiting for inspiration.

"But I have so much inspiration for this project and want to start right away!"

Something I am learning as a writer is delayed gratification. I am an impulsive person and I want to jump into things right away, but then I get disappointed with the results. For example, I released 9 Years Yearning before commissioning a really good cover. I regret that and I'm going to learn from that mistake with the next book in The Eirenic Verses.

By waiting, you get a better payoff.

I've got four different projects waiting to be released and one waiting for serious revisions. They are all finished, but they're not polished. It would be very easy for me to spend a few hours formatting them and then just throw them up, but I won't get the best payoff then.

Instead, I'll wait for a break between projects before turning back to them and fixing them up, giving them all my attention. Yes, it means I don't release a billion books a year, but it also means I release my best work.

Writing is not a sprint; it's a marathon. It's okay to give your projects a break.

By letting my stories rest, sometimes for entire months, I can come back to them with fresh eyes and make sure they're perfect. The same is true of your WIPs. Let them sit and marinate for a while.

How to avoid having a billion WIPs:

Make a list of future WIPs. Put it in one document. Add things as you think about them.

Put this list of WIPs away and ignore it.

Allow yourself to get some writer's block if you're struggling with your current project. Writer's block is okay sometimes. Don't use writer's block as permission to start something else.

Put reminders up that tell you not to start things. I like the phrase "bird by bird" which I got from the eponymous book by Anne Lamott (which is really good writing advice).

Read up on task switching and the myth of multitasking to show why having a million WIPs doesn't work.

Interrogate yourself. When you have a bunch of WIPs, do you actually get any of them done? Be realistic and ruthless with yourself.

Look back at how many WIPs you have in storage. Identify your WIP completion rate. It's probably lower than you think.

Read about the writing habits of other writers. You'll find most successful writers do not have a ton of different projects at once. They also go one at a time.

"No I'm going to write a million WIPs anyway! You don't know me!"

Okay, then go for it. You're not obligated to take my advice. I can only tell you that the science - and my personal experience - says that's not a good idea.

Ultimately, it doesn't really matter to me if you continue to stop and start a gazillion different projects and get none of them done. That's your problem, not mine.

But I'd rather you be able to finish something you're proud of, because then you're growing as a writer, and I always encourage personal growth.

It honestly makes me sad when people go "teehee I have soooo many WIPs and I just started another one hehehe!" because I know, without a doubt, that almost none of them will see the light of day.

You deserve better than a bunch of unfinished projects. You can achieve more than that. Put down the WIP list, focus on your current story, and go for it.

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pippin-katz · 1 year ago

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I need a cast audiobook of RWRB. If no one else, then at least Taylor and Nick reading Alex and Henry. I need it in my life.

And in ACD fashion, here’s a few lists of lines/conversations from the book that I am desperate to hear them say. I want to hear them read all of the lines, but these are the ones that pop out to me!

Post Writing Note: These turned out to be way longer than I thought they were going to be 😭😂

Alex Lines:

Oh yeah, that was a wild night. Two whole keynote speakers. Nothing sexier than shrimp cocktails and an hour and a half of speeches on carbon emissions. - page 5

'Archnemesis' implies he's actually a rival to me on any level and not, you know, a stuck-up product of inbreeding who probably jerks off to photos of himself. - page 7

Jesus Christ, it’s like they can see into your soul. Cornbread knows my sins, Henry. Cornbread knows what I have done, and he is here to make me atone. - page 77

I always thought you’d kill me in a more personal way. Silk pillow over my face, slow and gentle suffocation. Just you and me. Sensual. - page 80

Shut up, shut all the way up, oh my God. - page 131

For fuck's sake, man, you just had my dick in your mouth, you can kiss me good-night. - page 145

What in the rich-white-people-sex-dungeon hell? - page 149

Bisexuality is truly a rich and complex tapestry. - page 194

Listen: I'll fly to London right now and pull you out of whatever pointless meeting you're in and make you admit how much you love it when I call you "baby". I'll take you apart with my teeth, sweetheart. - page 204

You don't get to sit up here and pretend like it's someone else's problem. None of us do. - page 209

i want to see a cage match between your grandmother and this fucking ghoul running against my mom. - page 221

I do think I got a gut feeling with you, I just didn't have what I needed in my head to understand it. But I kind of kept chasing it anyway, like I was just going blindly in a certain direction and hoping for the best. I guess that makes you the North Star? - page 244

Henry! Your Royal fucking Highness! - page 269

Really nice. Fuckin' ghost me for a week, make me stand in the rain like a brown John Cusack, and now you won't even talk to me. I'm really just having a great time here. I can see why y'all had to marry your fucking cousins. - page 270

I fucking love you, okay? Fuck, I swear. You don't make it fucking easy. But I'm in love with you. - page 271

I'll leave, as soon as you tell me to leave. - page 275

Okay, I'm into making history. - page 280

I completely fucking love you. - page 291

I'm there for whatever you decide you want to do, just, like, let me know if I need to start practicing gazing wistfully out the window, waiting for my love to return from the war. - page 296

AN INCOMPLETE LIST: THINGS I LOVE ABOUT HRH PRINCE HENRY OF WALES Note: just the entire list, I need it, but I'll point out some of the best ones anyway lol

9. How hard you try. 10. How hard you've always tried. 11. How determined you are to keep trying. - page 303

16. Your huge, generous, ridiculous, indestructible heart. 17. Your equally huge dick. 18. The face you just made when you read that last one. - page 303

20. The fact that you loved me all along. - page 303

God, I want to fight everyone who's ever hurt you, but it was me too, wasn't it? All that time. I'm so sorry. - page 303

Listen, I'm telling you right now, I will physically fight your grandmother myself if I have to, okay? And, like, she's old. I know I can take her. - page 312

You and me and history, remember? We're just gonna fucking fight. Because you're it, okay? I'm never gonna love anybody in the world like I love you. - page 312

Sería una mentira, porque no sería él. (It would be a lie, because it wouldn't be him.) - page 317

but i've kissed your mouth, that corner, that place it goes, so many times now. i've memorized it. topography on the map of you, a world i'm still charting. i know it. i added it to the key. here: inches to miles. i can multiply it out, read your latitude and longitude. recite your coordinates like la rosaria. - page 319

give yourself away sometimes, sweetheart. there's so much of you. - page 320

Zahra, you're my mean friend. - page 339

I've never... I haven't been through anything like that. But I've always felt it, in him. There's this side of him that's... unknowable. But the thing is, jumping off cliffs is kinda my thing. That's the choice. I love him, with all that, because of all that. On purpose. I love him on purpose. - page 344

For what it's worth, that is the bravest son of a bitch I've ever met. - page 347

My life is a cosmic joke and you're not a real person. - page 371

You are, the absolute worst idea I've ever had. - page 372

FIRST SON ALEXANDER CLAREMONT-DIAZ'S ADDRESS FROM THE WHITE HOUSE, OCTOBER 2, 2020 - pages 372-375 Note: just, the entire speech, the whole thing

America: He is my choice. - page 374

Henry Lines:

Hmm, I always liked Luke. He's brave and good, and he's the strongest Jedi of them all. I think Luke is proof that it doesn't matter where you come from or who your family is--you can always be great if you're true to yourself. - page 45

The turkeys are not going to Jurassic Park you. You’re not the bloke from Seinfeld. You’re Jeff Goldblum. Go to sleep. - page 82

You are the thistle in the tender and sensitive arse crack of my life. - page 73

fucking eyelashes - page 142

I shall just have to make it the best orgasm of your life. What can I do to make it good for you? Talk about American tax reform during the act? Have you got talking points? - page 196

How is a man to get anything done knowing Alex Claremont-Diaz is out there on the loose? - pages 202-203

They wanted something less fruity than the truth, but truly, what is gayer than a woman who languishes away in a crumbling mansion wearing her wedding gown every day of her life, for the drama? - page 205

Someone else's choice doesn't change who you are. - page 229

Most things are awful most of the time, but you're good. - page 230

The phrase "see attached bibliography" is the single sexiest thing you have ever written to me. - page 241

Should I tell you that when we're apart, your body comes back to me in dreams? That when I sleep, I see you, the dip of your waist, the freckle above your hip, and when I wake up in the morning, it feels like I've been with you, the phantom touch of your hand on the back of my neck fresh and not imagined? That I can feel your skin against mine, and it makes every bone in my body ache? That, for a few moments, I can hold my breath and be back there with you, in a dream, in a thousand rooms, nowhere at all? - page 242 Note: based on the parts of this we did get to hear Nick say in the film, I think this would kill half the fandom lol

When have I ever, since the first instant I touched you, pretended to be anything less than in love with you? - page 272

I never thought I'd be stood here faced with a choice I can't make, because I never... I never imagined you would love me back. - page 273

The Mail will write mad speculations about where I've gone, if I've offed myself or vanished to St. Kilda, but only you and I will know that I'm just sprawled in your bed, reading books and feeding myself profiteroles and making love to you endlessly until we both expire in a haze of chocolate sauce. It's how I'd want to go. - page 294

Here lies Prince Henry of Wales. He died as he lived: avoiding plans and sucking cock. - page 298

"Because I'm not like the rest of the men of this family, beginning with the fact that I am very deeply gay, Philip." - page 298

But the first time I saw you. Rio. I took that down to the gardens. I pressed it into the leaves of a silver maple and recited it to the Waterloo Vase. It didn't fit in any rooms. - page 300

I thought, this is the most incredible thing I have ever seen, and I had better keep it a safe distance away from me. I though, if someone like that ever loved me, it would set me on fire. - page 300

And then, inexplicably, you had the absolute audacity to love me back. - page 300 Note: I really wanted to just type out most of the page, but I restrained myself lmfao

I don't know if I would have chosen it yet, but it's out there now, and... I won't lie. Not about this. Not about you. - page 338

Bit short for a stormtrooper. - page 340

I've bloody well had it. I've sat about long enough letting you and Gran and the weight of the damned world keep me pinned, and I'm finished. I don't care. You can take your legacy and your decorum and you can shove it up your fucking arse, Philip. I'm done. - page 347

I've been as gay as a maypole since the day I came out of Mum, Philip. - page 353 Note: there's never too many times to hear the words "gay as a maypole" and the emotional infliction here is lot different lol

Both:

Am I offending you? Sorry I'm not obsessed with you like everyone else. I know that must be confusing for you. Do you know what? I think you are. Only a thought. Have you ever noticed I have never once approached you and have been exhaustingly civil every time we've spoken? Yet here you are, seeking me out again. Simply an observation. - page 18

This is idiotic. Let's get it over with. I'd rather be waterboarded. Your country could probably arrange that. Go fuck yourself. Hardly enough time. - pages 36-37 Note: yes, I know Nick read this part in his book-to-screen video thingy but it's not the same as having them both saying the lines fully in character.

What does Jedi have? Fuckin' Ewoks. Ewoks are iconic. Ewoks are stupid. - page 52

yo there's a bond marathon on and did you know your dad was a total babe I BEG YOU TO NOT - page 84

I'm going to die. I'm going to kill you. Yes, you are. - page 133

You were jealous. You want me. Yes, you preening arse, I've wanted you long enough that I won't have you tease me for another fucking second. - page 137

Hi. Hello. I'm gonna take your pants off now. Yes, good, carry on. - page 141

Ugh, you look ridiculous. Should I-- What? No, of course not, keep them on. Oh my God, what are you doing? I can't even look at you. No, Jesus, I just mean--I'm so mad at you. Just, come here. Fuck. I'm quite confused. Me fucking too. - page 150

I'm not... historically great at talking about things. Well, I wasn't historically great at blowjobs, but we all gotta learn and grow, sweetheart. - page 165

Bitch, you took me there. alskdjfadslfjad NORA YOU BROKE HIM - page 212

D'you know what I want? What? I want, to do the absolute last thing I'm supposed to be doing right now. Then tell me to do it, sweetheart. Fuck me. Well, when at Wimbledon. Just so we're clear, I'm about to have sex with you in this storage closet to spite your family. Like, that's what's happening? Right. Awesome, fucking' love doing things out of spite. - page 217 Note: I think this conversation could singlehandedly kill the fandom if we got to hear Taylor and Nick deliver these lines

Can't you ever just do one thing without having to be so goddamn extra about it? That is bloody rich coming from you. - pages 260-261

What do you want? I want you- Then fucking have me. -but I don't want this. - page 273

You seem... less pissy. You're one to talk. I wasn't the one who stormed the palace in a fit to call me an 'obtuse fucking asshole'. In my defense, you were an obtuse fucking asshole. - page 277

I honestly have never thought I deserved to choose. But you treat me like I do. You do. I think I'm actually starting to believe that. - page 279

What about you? What about me? Christ, Alex. The whole bloody time. The whole time? Since the Olympics. The Olympics? But that's, that's like- Yes, Alex, the day we met, nothing gets past you, does it? 'What about you,' he says, as if he doesn't know- Shut your mouth. - page 283-284

Hello, what was that for? I just, like, really love you. - page 286

What are you doing? I'm taking a picture of a national gay landmark. And also a statue. It's funny. I always thought of the whole things as the most unforgivable thing about me, but you act like it's one of the best. Oh, yeah. The top list of reason to love you goes brain, then dick, then imminent status as a revolutionary gay icon. You are quite literally Queen Victoria's worst nightmare. And that's why you love me. My god, you're right. All this time, I was just after the bloke who'd most infuriate my homophobic forebears. Ah, and we can't forget they were also racist. Certainly not. Next time we shall visit some of the George III pieces and see if they burst into flame. - page 289

If Alex from this time last year could see this. He'd say, 'Oh I'm in love with Henry? That must be why I'm such an arse to him all the time'. - page 387

Thanks for reading!! If you enjoyed this post & would like to support me, you can give me a tip on my Ko-Fi! ☺️

#red white and royal blue #rwrb #rwrb movie #rwrb book #alex claremont-diaz #taylor zakhar perez #henry fox mountchristen-windsor #henry hanover-stuart fox #nicholas galitzine #firstprince #history huh? bet we could make some

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