#130%! bigger! than! their! body!

[breadxrust]

WHY IS NOBODY TALKING ABOUT THE TUFTED GROUND SQUIRREL? AKA VAMPIRE SQUIRREL?

[tj-crochets]

No crafting update today because I spent all my spoons checking out a local(ish) wildlife reservation/hiking place, which was awesome! I could not explore the whole place, and it is very much "only wheelchair friendly if the person pushing my wheelchair is capable of holding my entire weight against a steep slope and immediately pushing the chair up another only partially paved steep slope", but I walked the whole time*! I got to hear wolves howling through the forest and it is a whole hell of a lot eerier to hear on a foggy day in a winter forest than it was the only other time I've heard it, which was a very bright sunny day in an amphitheater at a zoo where one wolf howled alone on stage. There were crows cawing and wolves howling and it was absolutely magnificent and suddenly a whole lot of things from various fantasy novels I read as a kid hit very different. Like, I get why hearing the wolves howl in the night would be alarming now! *we did bring my rollator/transport chair in the car, and the backup plan was that my dad or my brother would go get it and push me back to the car if I needed help

[inbabylontheywept]

i did wrestling in middle school. on one hand, i was actually quite good at it, which was nice. being good at any sport was a new achievement for me. on the other hand, i was bi, and i was trying very hard not to notice that i was bi, and getting folded into knots by very kind, very muscular dorks made that task somewhat difficult.

adding fire to the problem was that my parents and my grandparents wanted to watch my matches, because they were very proud that their Gangly Nerd Son was actually Sporting, and they wanted to cheer me on. which would've been sweet and all, but if there are four people you do not want there during a key part of your Burgeoning Sexual Awakening, it is your mom and your dad and your grandma and your grandpa.

right? i mean, imagine some guy's got your head in his armpit, and you're going you know, old sweat smells bad, but fresh sweat has a sort of and then you make eye contact with your grandpa in the stands and you remember you're swearing spandex so if you pop a boner people aren't just going to be able to see the outline, they're going to be able to count the veins, and the only way you will be able to restore your family's honor after that would be by moving to siberia and renouncing joy, forever. that, or lift your entire body up by your kneck then twist 180 degrees without paralyzing yourself.

it’s a lot of pressure, is what i’m saying.

still it did motivate me to win my matches really fast. because i was so tall and skinny, i was stupidly good at the double leg takedown, and then once someone was knocked down, i'd just do the half nelson and kind of flip em over for the pin. then the ref would count to three and i’d win. EZPZ.

i had one match where that went great. won in the first ten seconds, sat back down, and prepared myself for a good hour or two of doing fuck all. didn't even feel bad the parents/grandparents were gonna be bored. the matches went up from me in 5 pound increments (i was in the 115 lbs division) and it was going great until we got to the 145 lbs division. the other school's wrestler stepped onto the mat, and she turned out to be a girl so our guy flipped, because for straight guys, wrestling a girl is not a pleasant experience.

i'm not entirely unsympathetic. my experience wrestling dudes was definitely a little traumatic. but also, i dealt. guy could've dealt too. instead, he refused to wrestle, and the coach went - fine. not even worth fighting over.

so he went to the 140 pounder, and that guy said, nosir, my mom said mormons can't wrestle girls. next guy down, 135 pounder, now he knew he could pull the same card and thus did. 130 pounder, 125, both tapped out. he got to the 120 guy, and that guy was catholic, but he said he was considering being mormon, and thus would have to pass. as a precaution.

coach blew up a little at that. he said "is there anyone - anyone - on this entire goddamn team that is willing to wrestle a girl?" and then he pointed at me and said "YOU. MAT. GO."

and i'll be real, if i'd been paying more attention, i'd have pulled the mormon card too, but i'd just been putting all that audio into a buffer file because i was reading, so i was halfway across the mat before i even processed what had been said and by then it was too late to turn back.

still i had a plan. and my plan - my beautiful, perfect plan - was to do what i'd always done. tackle, flip, pin, win. sit down. read. bore my family to death. move on.

i got the first part right. she was bigger than me, but she wasn't taller. just an incredibly stout woman. god built me like a snake with glasses, just as he built her like a combat cube. the problem was the half nelson. soon as she was down, i tried hooking my arm under hers from behind and for both genders, the defense for this move is just clamping your arms really fucking tight against your sides. if you're a guy, that's whatever, but if you're a girl - especially if you're god's chosen combat cube - that pins your opponents hand right against your boob.

so, i got the hook in, she clamped, my whole arm pressed against something soft, my coach was yelling THE HALF NELSON. BABYLON! JUST FINISH IT! FINISH THE HALF NELSON! and i was just trying to press hard enough to finish, when then my brain went

...oh.

and i flipped out. of course i flipped out. i like girls, and touching a boob is an elemental experience, and i was not ready. i was not prepared. i had not committed the sacred rites. i recoiled like i'd just brushed my arm against the surface of the sun, stood up, and backed away. nobody in the room knew why i'd given up. all they saw was me, right about to win, suddenly flailing around and scrambling. so everyone started screaming at me to just get the half nelson again, and i couldn't really yell back there's a fuckin' boob in the way and it was very distressing, and the only way i could think of to make them stop was just doing it over again the right way.

so i did.

i hunkered down and prepared myself for Wrasslin' Attempt #2: The Sequel.

i knocked her down again, EZPZ. i went for the half nelson again, but she knew what i was about to do so she super clamped, and i knew she was gonna super clamp, so i wound my arm back like a pop-eye cartoon punch before swinging my arm through the gap between her bicep and her side, but the amount of time i spent winding back super signalled what i was about to to do, which gave her time to clamp even harder, which somehow redirected the entire force of the popeye punch to the bottom of her bra.

it spat out a single boob the same way an action hero might spit out one single tooth after getting a solid crack across the jaw. as if to say:

*ptooie.* "that all you got?"

i did not actually see this. my experience was that first there was an arm, then there was a bit of boob, but i was braced, i was ready, forward at all costs, tatakae motherfuckers, and then the boob went away, and i didn't know where it went but my team, and the audience, and everyone who was in front of me, they all gasped like i just kicked them in the stomach. except for my coach. he was behind me, and thus one of the four people in the room who did not see the boob. now my mom, my dad, my grandma, and my grandpa, they all got flashed but nooooooo, coach thunderbutt was behind me, and he didn't see shit so he was still yelling NOOOOOO BABYLON WHAT ARE YOU DOING JUST FINISH THE NELSON! GO FOR THE KILL! BABYLON! BABYLON!

but i did not go for the kill. i stood up and she stuffed her boob back real fast, and we just kind of circled each other awkwardly until time ran out and i won on points. that's not technically allowed, but the ref had some mercy on me.

my coach did not.

i barely had time to sit down before he strode over to the bench to chew me out.

"babylon," he said, in that very calm way people get when they're too pissed to yell. "why didn't you pin?"

and i didn't know how to say well coach, i tried, but there was a boob, and it kept getting in the way, and my mom was watching, and so was my dad, and so was his dad, and his mom, and god (like bible god) and that's a can of worms because i'm pretty sure he was already mad at me, and i'm wearing spandex, and i think i might have to move to siberia, so instead i said

"i uh. i forgot how to do the half nelson."

which is actually impossible. forgetting how to do the half nelson is like forgetting how to swallow your spit.

and he looked at me, like i was the dumbest person in the entire world, and i looked through him like i'd just survived my 250th day in a trench at verdun, and he said: fine.

fine.

but we're all going to practice it for an hour tomorrow because you forgot.

and then he left.

and my buddies had the gall to be salty about it. i got so many comments saying "dude, why didn't you just tell him the truth?" and i said "you can if you care so damn much. you could've wrestled the girl too. maybe someone else should do the hard thing today."

but they didn't. so the next day, we did an hour of half nelson drills, and i spent a decent amount of time getting thrown around the mat, and it was pleasant in exactly the way that i hated and the year after that, to the surprise of everyone but myself, i quit wrestling and joined the trivia team.

and if you want more reasons to love my mom, my grandpa joked after the match that i might have to talk to my bishop about it, and my mom told him he would be allowed to make jokes after he stood in front of a crowd of 110 people in spandex underpants while wrestling a woman that was not his wife.

he paused for almost five seconds after that. then he said: aw. hell. sorry babylon.

and i'd have preferred my apology from god, but getting it from him was pretty good too.

[hartdoc]

After Shower CPR

(Note: all about the story, including names and locations, are 100% fictional. I made this story using some old pictures)

ICU PATIENT REPORT: BASIC INFO: NAME: Thiago Fonseca AGE: 24 HEIGHT: 1.79 m WEIGHT: 78 kg ETHNICITY: White, Latino

RECENT HISTORY: The patient was just coming out from having a shower this morning when he started feeling some severe chest pains.

He asked his boyfriend for help, who in turn, called 911 as he tried to assist the patient. However, the patient eventually collapsed without a pulse.

The patient's boyfriend was preparing to give him CPR when the paramedics arrived in time. They started to undress the patient and check his status.

"No heartbeat, start CPR..." After not finding a pulse, the paramedics start performing CPR on Thiago with strong compressions.

1,2,3,4,5...

28,29,30 breathe!... The paramedics give a two full cycles of 30 compressions and 2 rescue breaths on Thiago before checking his pulse again.

No pulse, let's continue CPR... Since the patient's heart still refused to beat, the paramedics resume compressions again on Thiago's naked body.

1,2,3,4,5... come on! After 3 more minutes of intense CPR, the paramedics take out a small box and grab the defibrillator paddles from it, preparing to shock Thiago's heart.

Analyzing... shock advised... charging to 200J... The paramedics then push the buttons on the paddles, sending a strong shock throught the patient's heart. All clear!

Let's check his pulse now... The EMTs take out their stethoscope again and place it on the patient's bare chest. Only to hear complete silence...

Still no pulse, resume compressions... The paramedics quickly resume chest compressions on Thiago, going on for a couple more minutes.

28, 29, 30, breathe... Still nothing... The paramedics take the defib paddles again, preparing to give another shock to Thiago's stricken heart.

Shock advised... Charging to 300J... The paramedics prepare to send an even bigger shock than last time in order to try and get Thiago's heart to beat again...

All clear!!... Still nothing. After the shock sent Thiago's heart into flatline, the paramedics resume their CPR efforts, desperately struggling to restart Thiago's heart as the minutes pass on.

Come on... 28,29, 30, breathe!! After five more minutes of strong compressions and giving him some epinephrine, Thiago's heart goes into V-fib again. The doctors prepare to give him another shock.

Shock advised, charging to 360J... The doctors decide to give him an even bigger shock as a desperate attempt to get the patient's heart to beat again.

All clear!!... "Gaahghgh" After the defib shock, the patient started loudly gasping for air. The paramedics then decide to check his heart for a pulse.

Heart rate is 130, a bit fast but sounding strong, let's transport him to the hospital. After 12 minutes of CPR, Thiago's heart started beating again. The paramedics then proceed to take him in an ambulance to the hospital while they continue to monitor him.

Pulse is now 94. Blood pressure 125/95, he seems stable... "You'll be OK Thiago, we're taking you to the hospital now, just keep breathing"... The paramedics monitor Thiago's vitals while giving him comforting words in order to keep him relaxed, until they finally arrive to the ICU. In the ICU the patient's lower body is covered in a blanket as the doctors start performing more detailed exams.

"His name is Thiago Fonseca, 24 years old male. He suffered from chest pains and went into cardiac arrest at home. We had to perform CPR on him for 12 minutes. BP is 130/95, his Heart Rate is 83, Breathing Rate 18. No obvious signs of injury"... After performing some exams, the doctors find a serious defect in Thiago's coronary arteries which caused his heart attack. This means Thiago requires open heart surgery soon...

[roughribo]

How to do waxwriting play:

I've always loved waxplay, as a sadist I get a lot of joy out of watching my partner squirm in pain. But as a writer I've always had lots of fun playing around with the idea of bodywriting kink and using my partner's body as my writing canvas. One day several years ago I decided to combine my interests in waxplay and bodywriting and not only were the results stunning, but it was surprisingly easy to do. I've searched for it online, I've been to kink events, but I've never seen anyone mention it. It kind of feels like I just invented a new kink in a way.

The result is what I call "waxwriting," an activity that combines the fun of writing on someone with the sadomasochism of hot wax.

The supplies:

Waxplay candles (soy preferred, paraffin not recommended)

A set of kid's watercolor paint brushes

Electric wax warmer (or way to heat and control temperature of the wax without an open flame)

Thermometer

Towel/paper towels for brush cleanup

Safety rant:

The most important thing about this is having a way to have a sustained small pool of melted wax at a SAFE and controlled temperature. I achieved this by using soy waxplay candles and a wax warmer that I normally used to make my home smell good.

However, this is a big important point I want to make, do NOT assume that a wax warmer will heat your wax to a safe temperature. While most warmers fall in that range, please take temperature measurements by using water and a thermometer in the saucer of the wax warmer and practice the actual technique with caution before ever trying this on a live person.

Temperatures near and above 150 Fahrenheit (65 Celsius) are unsafe and are likely to blister and burn the skin but even before that point, some people find temperature play above 130 Fahrenheit (54 Celsius) to be a hard limit, so have a talk with your sub about preferences or run a "sexperiment", a nonsexual play session dedicated to playing out a high risk scene ahead of time to figure out the logistics of the scene and the limits of the people playing in the scene. Being able to do a dry run of a scene beforehand can give you invaluable information for how to conduct future play. And no it doesn't lessen the magic of the actual scene late on.

Some logistics:

Okay safety tangent over. For now. Since soy wax has a lower melting point of roughly 113-127 degrees Fahrenheit (45-54 degrees Celsius), it sits firmly in the middle of the temperature range that most commercially available home wax warmers tend to heat up to of 100-150 degrees Fahrenheit (38-65 degrees Celsius). For reference, my wax warmer averaged 130 Fahrenheit (54 Celsius)

I had less luck with paraffin wax candles because they had a higher melting point of around 115-142 degrees Fahrenheit (46-61 degrees Celsius) but also tended to cool quicker making them unsuitable for transferring to the skin via the paintbrush because the paraffin wax would just harden on the brush before I could write with it.

Soy wax actually retained heat long enough for me to write strokes across my skin while still being that sadistic pleasurable temperature. Because the thermal conduction of paraffin wax is greater than that of soy wax I recommend using soy wax candles for this activity, as the retention of heat is crucial for actually writing on your submissive.

The actual tutorial:

The actual technique is fairly simple. Put your wax into the wax warmer now that you have established the wax warmer heats to a safe temperature (I had to cut the candle with a butterknife and remove the wick). Heat your wax using your wax warmer and let it become liquid. Grab a smaller brush from your kit, I found that flat brushes with a width of 4mm to 6mm produced the best results, but you could go bigger if you wanted, there are just certain downsides I will discuss later.

Dip your paintbrush in the liquid wax and get it thoroughly soaked in wax. The next part is the simplest part to understand but hardest to master. The moment you remove your brush from the wax, it will start to cool, so it's important that the distance between your wax warmer and the body you're writing on is close and you must get a feel for the timing between soaking the paintbrush and applying it to the submissive that gives your submissive that "almost too warm" sensation and not be too hot or too cold. For me in my experiments, this was roughly a second.

Do not press into the skin, or else you will deposit all of the wax at once. Run the head of the brush over the skin and the wax will come off naturally before it starts to get too cool to apply to the skin, or roughly 3-4 seconds, in my experience. Depending on how fast you write this could be roughly anywhere from 2-5 letters per dip of the brush.

Which brings me to my first con of this activity. Unlike just dripping or pouring wax over someone's body, waxwriting has these frequent pauses while reapplying wax to the brush. I personally am not bothered by this, but know that it may be inconvenient for others.

The next con is this: the wider the brush the more dipping you need to do and your wax gets used up quicker because of the size of the lettering you need to do. Keeping your brushes and letters smaller tended to let me write more efficiently with letters roughly an inch in size. But if you want to write "SLUT" in huge broad strokes to embarrass your sub, by all means, grab a larger brush, just keep an eye on the wax you have available so you don't wind up with just "SLU" before you run out of wax.

The third con is that you may need to take breaks to heat up more wax. As I only had the one wax warmer I occasionally needed to stop to heat more wax. I found when using the smaller flat brushes the wax will actually last for a while. The smaller the brush you go, the longer you can write on someone for before needing to refill.

The final con is cleanup because it's very clear these paintbrushes will not last forever, and wax is even harder to clean out of the bristles than paint. Running it under hot water and taking a paper towel to them helped, however, somebody could always butt in and tell me I'm doing this wrong and there's an easier way to remove wax from bristles I'm just not familiar with.

Public Service Sub Announcement:

Has your sub drank water today? Make them. More news at 11.

In conclusion:

Be safe and happy waxwriting. Feel free to share any results in a reblog or tag. It's a fun way to introduce pain into bodywriting kink that feels very intimate and has the added bonus of being very photogenic.

I've been wanting to share this knowledge for a while ever since I discovered it years and years ago. I recently came across my documentation for the initial experiments and decided to present everything here on tumblr and share my findings. It's definitely a niche activity but I think it has so much potential for a BDSM date night, a kinky photoshoot, or maybe even as an activity at your local dungeon.

[zypq23]

from a wg roleplay quiz

You wake up in a strange room and have no idea how you got there. There are no windows and only one door, and all the walls are mirrors. You see a screen with a number: your current weight. You stand up, tense. A disguised voice suddenly tells you that you are about to start gaining weight rapidly. The game has begun.

You see the number on the screen increase by one. Supposedly you have gained one pound, but you don't feel any different. Then the number increases again. Then jumps two. You hope it goes to your butt.

The number says you have gained four pounds. You still don't look or feel any different and you still have a flat, tight abdomen and a toned figure. You wish this stupid game would get to the point already. Your eyes turn to stare at your svelte body.

You have gained eight pounds. You were beginning to think this is all fake, but now when you touch your belly it feels less tight than before, more sensitive. It still looks flat, but now it feels almost squishy! You barely look any different, but now your body is starting to feel ever so slightly softer. You notice how you're aware of the sensation of your clothing on your skin...

You have gained sixteen pounds. You still look mostly the same, but you look and feel like you're being filled up. It's a noticeable gain. Your jawline is softer. You can pinch an inch or so of squishy fat off your belly. Your arms and legs are less toned, your butt is rounder, your chest is larger, and your love-handles are getting plump.

You have gained 33 pounds. This is clearly a noticeable gain and you are nearly overweight. The basic shape of your figure is still there, but it's bigger and softer, filling up with soft fat. As you move to touch your belly, your arms, legs, and butt start to jiggle a little. You can easily pinch a chunk of fat off your belly, which is starting to push out in front of you. Wait a minute, your jeans feel a lot tighter than before! You can feel your butt and widening hips straining against the tough denim. Good thing your shirt was a bit looser to begin with, but with your belly starting to stick out, who knows how much more your clothes can withstand. You feel small love-handles roll over the waistband of your jeans. One more pound and you'll be officially overweight.

You have gained 67 pounds. At 187lb you are overweight and practically obese. Your clothes no longer fit your expanding form: so tight, so uncomfortable. Your belly clearly goes past your jeans waistline and you can feel it pressing against the underside of your growing muffin top. As your rolls fill up with fat, you think your shirt is shrinking. You're getting bigger. Your love-handles are thick, heavy, and sensitive as your back, too, swells with fat. You feel every jiggle with every movement. Your round butt rips through the seat of your pants. Your chest is so big, you need a proper bra. Your arms have bat wings. Your swollen thighs no longer have a gap and rub together. Your groin is activated by this new sensation. Your cheeks expand into your field of view and you notice you have a double chin. You're so fat, your face is fat. You can hardly recognize yourself as your belly bursts out of your clothes...

You have gained 130 pounds. You feel so fat and heavy. As you get bigger, your skin expands, you feel everything. You've more than doubled your initial weight, putting you at a quarter of a ton. You are officially obese. Your fat face expands, your neck fills with chub. Your huge belly muffins over your painfully tight waistband and swells out of your shirt. You hear snaps and rips as your clothes attempt to contain your enormous, expanding form, ripping at the seams. You reach around your huge belly and scrabble for your jean button, but you hear a loud POP, the button tears off and you feel a release as your belly rests heavily on your groin. You grunt and moan. When you look down, you can't see anything below your massive belly. You feel every jiggle, every movement, your sensitive rolls mushrooming into each other. You're getting bigger, heavier, fatter. You feel your belly expand in your hands as you swell and fill with fat.

You have gained 279 pounds. You are now morbidly obese. Your tiny, toned figure is long gone, filled up with sensitive, jiggling, inescapable fat. You can barely walk, only waddle, your plump arms rising from your thickening sides. Soon you won't be able to reach the underside of your belly. You know if you gain much more weight you'll never get up again... But it's too late to lose most of the weight at this point anyway. You have completely exploded out of your small clothes and your constantly growing belly hangs far past the place where your pants used to be. Your arms, legs, butt, and chest have an abundance of extra fat stored on them, and your rolls weighing down with gravity. You have to sit down, panting heavily. Your huge butt and hips splay out under you and your rolls of back fat loll behind you. Your belly rests far on your lap and fat rolls bunch up. You can stick your entire finger in your belly button and heft handfuls of fat off your huge belly. Just moving takes up a lot of work and when you do, you feel your entire body jiggle and your belly sways back and forth. You don't know how much bigger you can get. You feel so incredibly heavy and fat, you feel every quivering roll, you feel your belly fattening and growing. You're filling up. Bigger. Bigger. Bigger.

You have gained 500 pounds. You are morbidly obese and immobile. Your belly has grown so huge you can barely reach all of the fat on it. You have rolls upon rolls, a wobbling vessel of fat. You feel yourself jiggle at the slightest movement and your massive belly shakes and swings back and forth with every motion. You'll definitely be facing health problems at this point, and being immobile you will not be able to exercise to lose the weight. You don't look like your former self at all and barely even resemble a normal person. You're completely transformed.

You wake up in another strange room. Wait, no… You are in your living room and you have just removed a pair of Immersive VR glasses from your eyes. Now you remember deciding to try a customized simulation to help you decide if you should gain weight, and if so, how much to gain. You look down at your body and can see your legs and your feet. You can easily stand up and walk around. None of the weight you just gained was real. You feel small, weak, fragile, vulnerable, and hungry. You immediately go to your kitchen and open the cupboards, pulling food from shelves, as you call your favorite fast food delivery.

[y-rhywbeth2]

Next stage in the 'who has a bigger body count' competition Astarion started yesterday, while praying I can use a calculator correctly:

Bhaal VS Cazador: Deaths in Baldur's Gate over the last 15 years.

I counted about 22 active Bhaalists (including Orin, Sarevok and Durge), who, having to murder once every ten days, have about 12,045 kills between them. However, as briefly mentioned in game, most of them do not reside in Baldur's Gate and also Bhaal's clergy are usually a little nomadic, so this wouldn't have been too highly focused on the Gate.

They do need to kill a living thing every day, so that's also another 108,405 dead things which may or may not be human/oid.

As for the vampires, assuming they don't have a massive herd of blood dolls:

While vampires do need to feed a little less as they age, it's still not that much lower.

A typical Fledgling vampire must drink 12 hit points worth of blood in every 24-hour period. The source of this blood is immaterial; it can come from living victims, fresh corpses, animals, or even sealed “caches" of chilled blood. - Van Richten's Guide to Vampires

The typical person, people with adventuring classes being rarer, has 4 hit points. Or less. Sometimes you're lucky and 5e upgrades them to 1d8 with an average of 4. Add in older editions and level drain and normal people do not survive being fed on by vampires.

Judging by talking to Astarion, Cazador does drain his prey dry more often than not.

So on average Cazador has needed 3 kills a day, and over the past 15 years that's 3 kills every one of 5,475 days. Which is apparently 16,425 dead bodies. (7000 is small change to vampires and Archdevils alike, apparently. I keep coming back to this, but Mephistopheles' deal is extremely and suspiciously cheap.) Each spawn has needed about 12 rats each: 65,700 rats dead each, 459,900 rats altogether. I assume they feed the corpses to the ghouls.

Cazador forbidding his spawn human blood actually makes perfect sense. Aurelia and Astarion have been with him for most of that 200 years. Cazador has murdered at least the equivalent of 73,000 people, if those two also feed properly it's now 219,000 people. Petras and I assume Violet, are about 100: 109,500 kills each (or more). 438,000 people. Yousen is 60 (65,700), Dalyria less than 50 due to being a Peer (54,750); Leon's less than 12 (13,140). Altogether this 'family' would have killed aprox. 571,590 people over the last two centuries.

The Western Heartlands' city and town populations, circa 14th century, were:

Baldur's Gate: 42,103 Elturel: 22,671 Evereska: 21,051 Berdusk: 20,242 Iriaebor: 16,193 Scornubel: 14,574 High Edge: 9,716 Asbravn: 5,668 Hluthvar: 5,668 Beregost: 2,915 Secomber: 1,417 Daggerford: 891 Corm Orp: 810

Census indicates the Western Heartlands' total permanent population was 163,919, of which Cazador would have consumed the equivalent of 44.53%. I can only assume that he either fasts a lot or mixes in some animal blood (which would not have made him fun to be around for the spawn), or we're drawing off of VtM logistics and he has control of blood banks and a herd of living people he keeps alive plus just feeding off of his spawn to top him up between murders (which does explain the human staff).

I'm not counting the amounts of rats and mice consumed, but honestly I think there's money to be made hiring your spawn out as a pest control service. Assuming they don't drive themselves out of business.

There is absolutely no way the 7000 spawn in the cells should be anything but feral howling messes who are scrabbling for rats and bugs and cannibalising each other, assuming they haven't just shrivelled into the state of torpor from lack of blood to fuel the magic keeping their bodies animate. There is no feasible way to keep them fed. I don't even think there are enough rodents in the city to feed them...

Meanwhile Bhaalists have been active for 130 years since the end of the Bhaalspawn crisis, and have killed around 4,745 people each in that time. Luckily, they've been quite low in number, mostly nomadic, and only recently had a revival (which is still low population) so that probably not too many.

Verdict: DnD maths is poorly thought out and the vampires win the murder competition by goddamn miles. While Bhaal wins overall, due to having 1300+ years of murders to his name, Cazador's recent activity is higher, and Astarion has been accomplice to the number of murders that Durge only dreams of. Durge is still winning in the sadism and first degree murder count though.

[sknnytarot]

Long distance boyfriend thinspo imagine

It’s time, it’s really time. After waiting months, it’s finally time for my long distance boyfriend to come visit me. This is something I’ve been looking forward too, for the longest time now. About 9 months in the making, this was a huge decision that I had to work my way towards, as did he. This is so exciting.

Since we started talking about him coming to visit, since about 2 months into the relationship, I’ve been wanting to look my best for when that day did come. To start with, I weighed about 150 pounds around when we started talking. I was honest with him that I wasn’t okay with my body or with how fat I looked, and even though he tried telling me that he ‘likes bigger girls’, that only fueled my motivation even more to lose weight.

At first, I only wanted to lose maybe 20 pounds, get to 130 and be fine there. But that only took about 1.5 months to get there and it still didn’t feel like I’d lost enough weight. So my next goal was 110 pounds, 20 more lost. I started working out as much as I could, 3x a week at the time, and I started a low restriction diet as I wasn’t new to liquid fasting or eating a little during the day and nothing else. The highest I went calorie wise was 500 calories total and even that started to seem like it was just too much.

Once I reached 110 pounds, I could fit into some smaller pairs of jeans and they defined my now smaller waist. Definitely a lot smaller than 40 pounds ago, but when I looked in the mirror, I still saw a sloppy bag of fat…my reflection. 110 pounds definitely wasn’t good enough for me, so why would it be good enough for him to see in person? I decided I’d start losing weight until I was comfortable with how I looked, even though I knew I might never get there.

As the days passed, with me eating less than 500 calories every day while still working out on top of that, plus working a physical job and eating only fruits and vegetables and eggs for protein, I started to lose weight at a steady but fast pace. Soon enough, I’d lost 10 pounds more and weighed in at 100 pounds. ‘Just a little more’ I thought to myself. Maybe 5 pounds.

I lost those 5 pounds, then decided on 10 more and I’d be done. I had to get back in control of my weight so I didn’t end up dead before getting to meet him. It had been 4 months since we’d first started talking about him coming to visit me, from 4,000 miles away. That meant that I only had 3 months or so left to reach my goal weight and maintain it to regulate my body to that weight. After doing some research, I figured that the perfect BMI for me is 16.1…basically an underweight BMI.

I started to lose the last 10 pounds, bringing me down to 85 pounds total. That took me about a month, so that meant I had 2 months left to work on maintaining that weight so I could eat a little bit more when he came to visit so he wouldn’t get suspicious of me not eating as much as a normal person. I knew it wasn’t healthy to lose weight this way, and if I wasn’t careful enough, that I’d balloon back to my starting weight.

The two months flew past so quickly you’d only think it had been 2 weeks. I was looking forward to him coming to visit me and seeing my new body. I’d only sent him pictures of my face, and only my body when I was wearing super baggy clothes so he couldn’t see what I actually looked like before the big reveal. I’d lost about 65 pounds total, and that’s such a huge difference. I now have a thigh gap, a tiny waist, my ribs show, my collarbones and chest bones are so defined, and people treat me so amazingly nice it’s definitely a skinny privilege.

I drove to the airport to go pick him up as his flight was going to land in about an hour…okay so maybe I’d gotten there a bit early, but who could blame me? I was super excited. I waited the entire hour by walking around the airport, getting in as many steps as I could, counting the calories I burned. After the hour was up, I went to the gate he’d be landing at, and I held up the handmade sign I had for him so he could see it and I could hide behind it at first.

As the plane landed, and as people started filing off, I didn’t see him at all. As more people started to come off the plane, I was starting to get really worried, but then….then I saw his face through the crowd of people. He was looking around for me, and I shook the sign slightly, calling his name, and he finally noticed me.

His jaw dropped as he saw my dyed blonde hair, my big doe eyes, my sharp jawline. I laughed slightly to myself, starting to walk towards him. A few steps in and I couldn’t control my excitement or my pace anymore, and I started to run towards him. I got to him, jumped into his arms, and to my joy he was able to pick me up like nothing and spin me around.

“You’re so tiny love, I almost couldn’t see you behind the sign. You’ve lost so much weight from the pictures you sent me, I’m so proud of you. We’ve gotta take a picture and show our size difference for sure, you look absolutely tiny next to me, so small I could snap you like a twig” he said, looking me up and down, eyes scanning my entire body.

I made sure to dress super cute today, in something that defined my body shape. A pair of skinny jeans that were high waisted, a long sleeved crop top that showed my stomach at a perfect length, and a choker necklace to accentuate my slim neck. I had my blonde hair up in a ponytail to show off my sharp jawline, and I did a small amount of makeup because I didn’t want to clog my pores because I’d put in so much work to get my skin as clear as it was by doing my skincare routine every single day.

I hugged him again once he’d put me down, and then we started walking towards the exit. We got in my car, and I drove us back to my apartment, so we could enjoy the next 2 weeks he was here together, and I’d gotten off of work for this as well. I’m so excited to be able to spend the time with him, dressing however I want, knowing I look like I deserve a boyfriend so perfect for me. We were perfect together, and I loved knowing that.

[perplexingluciddreams]

i did sewing today!

the inside lining of a hood for my onesie. altering the hood to make bigger. piecing fabric together to make a bigger hood. this will mean i can sleep wearing onesie (i need hood up to sleep). also it was much too small before.

i based it on the huge hood of my favourite octopus hoodie! (i wear it right now). i lay it out on the floor and lay my fabric scraps out on top and draw lines for the shape i need to extend the original hood pieces into a bigger size. then did the same for the other side.

different project to the Marmalade dress mending! onesie idea popped into my head because it is so cold weather here in Scotland now! and i was daydreaming about warmer clothes and i thought of onesie. then remembered it is disassembled so i can't wear it yet!

the hood is currently unattached from the onesie. and the lining and outside hood are not connected yet.

i finished the lining together today. i had to piece different bits of fabric together for that too - i did the same shapes as the main hood, but i had to do extra piecing together for the lining because i had only smaller scraps of the thinner fabric.

last time, some of the seams mum sewed on the sewing machine. i drew lines and put pins or clips and asked her to sew along. (mum offered help that time, i wouldn't remember it is an option unless she offers every time!).

this time today i did some seams by hand. i do very tiny neat row stitches.

i also want to alter a few other things on onesie to make it better sensory and better fit. not sure how yet.

it is difficult to initiate or start. for many tasks this is impossible for me. or most often i need a lot of help and prompting.

today i got lucky! and partly it is possible because i have done the steps before. so i have the memories to follow for the steps, not have to make it up in my head on my own (which i can't do).

but still takes a lot of hard work and effort! to even get to a point of being set up to start sewing, i feel proud of myself that i did it.

sewing is also very hard work for my body. my heartrate got to 130 several times today. my hypotonic muscles struggle.

i have to do a bit, then flop, then do a bit, then flop.

i watched 24 hours in A&E to help as distraction so i wouldn't go full blown hyperfocus... which happened anyway. can't help it. but i really tried to pace myself! (i used to watch 24 hours in A&E when mum had it on the TV when i off school poorly).

also to get my muscles have enough tension to even do sewing, i end up unintentionally tensing whole body. and i contort into awful positions with attempt to create support for parts of my body (like elbows) so i can use other parts of body (like hands). it hurts a lot.

i twine my legs together and squeeze, i dig my elbows into my sides - or in this case, the duvet that i deliberately folded to create more support. i also hunch my neck forward to see better, even with glasses and lamp.

because i am so floppy i can't hold myself upright to sit up properly. so in bed i am propped up on pillows and i slide down so i am closer to lying down than sitting up. and that means when i hunch my neck and shoulders forwards (to see and to help use stabilise elbows and use hands), my chin is touching or almost touching my chest.

ouch! i am sore now and i will be sore tomorrow. and tired (but always tired 🤷🏻‍♂️).

but worth it. i am happy and proud of sewing.

i want to share pictures but i might have to wait until i finish. there is much more to be done still.

[ratsoh-writes]

Ages updated!!!!

I’m gonna do my best to include all important characters, including some “side characters” that appear often enough! So let’s begin!

Undertale: Sans: 65, papyrus: 49, Undyne: 47, alphys: 54,Toriel: 934, Asgore: 933, Grillby: 522, Mettaton: 22

Underswap: Star: 60, honey: 44, Twister: 44, Winter: 1013, Napstablook: 23

Underfell: Red: 66, edge: 43, storm: 44, King: 998, felltron: 21

Swapfell Mal: 60, cash: 51

Horrortale Oak: 75, willow: 59, Miss: 944

Horrorswap Lilac: 70, Basil: 54

Horrorfell Rust: 76, Noir: 53

Underlust Charm: 66, sugar: 52, Amor: 367, winnie: 10

Lustswap Sparks: 59, Salt: 50

Lustfell Lush: 63, Pepper: 51, Jezebel: 212, Marcelo goldenfoot: 455

Lustswapfell Sir: 68, weasel: 52, snow: 61

Lustred Flambe: 55, Pesto: 54

Lustgold Butler: 68, gold: 49

Outertale Pluto: 67, Jupiter: 49, titan: 598

Outerfell Orion: 60, atlas: 52

Outerswap Helios: 44, Artemis 36

Fellswap Lord: 60, mutt: 53

Fellswap gold Wine: 64, coffee: 50, Empress: 1033

Farmtale Peaches: 51, rancher: 46, Rosemary: 550, Yosemite: 501

Farmswap Cider: 50, Barley: 42, Carmen: 85, whisky: 520

Farmfell Ram: 49, pitch: 40, russet: 478, pooch: 489

Horrorfarm Moose: 64, maple: 53

Mafias Butch: 60, snipe: 58, ace: 53, boss: 50, slim: 48, bruiser: 45, tempest: 64, Don: 645, Madame: 647, Mr corgi (aka Charles): 67

Birdtale Quill: 59, crow: 51

Birdswap Mango: 62, papaya: 36, canary: 278

Birdfell Roost: 53, harpy: 42, Lewis: 90

Draketale Alden: 68, Ollivander: 60

Drakefell Barin: 71, Arwin: 59

Drakeswap Hilda: 66, saga: 63

Seatale Fisher: 60, Jasper 25

Seaswap Finn: 59, sails: 27

Seafell Hook: 58, captain: 30

Gastertale G: 80, green: 79

Dancetale Pop: 52, rhythm: 45, salsa: 678

Theatretale Tempo: 50, vibrato: 29

Fallouttale Lens: 69, cricket, 49, piranha: 65

Templetale Zen: 67, shield: 35

Nomadtale Gears: 49, compass: 42, copper: 645, lilo: 21, weave: 126, wisteria: 157, linden: 158

Here’s a quick rundown of a monsters lifespan:

A common monster has a life expectancy of 700 years give or take. The oldest monster in record (that wasn’t a royal) was a Drake monster who lived 732 years.

They are considered infants/babies up until the age of two. Toddlerhood is from 2-6

Children are from the ages of 7-13. Most monsters start public school at ages 7-8

Teenagers are from 14-19. Monsters mature at a slower rate than humans, and so while the body may look grown in the later teen years, they have yet to develop sexual maturity until around 20.

Once 20 they are considered adults, but some subspecies can continue growing up till 30

After puberty in the early 19-22 range, a monster is considered a young adult from 25-190. You can compare those ages to a human in their early to mid 20s physically

Middle Ages range from 200s- 400s roughly

500s are considered older and retirement age, 600s are elderly. Anything past 680 is fragile

The lifespan goes down with halfbreed monsters ( “full” monster parent and “full” human parent) where they live around 600-650 years

The lifespan takes a bigger drop for mages who have an expectancy of 250 years. Witches (humans who have trained to use magic) are known to live up to their 130s if they aren’t soulbonded to a monster partner.

Monsters and half breeds born with the disease called dimming rarely live past their 400s

An exception to the monster lifespan are the “royals”. They take a ritual after being voted into office that binds them to their country, making it so that any decisions they make for the country has to be for its and the peoples benefit (as far as they believe), making them a servant to ebott for the rest of their lives, but extending their life and health in return. The ritual can be broken for the royals who wish to retire and die in peace. The oldest recorded ruler was rumored to be around three thousand

And now the crash!!

For those who don’t know what that is, it’s when all the AUs merged (and my excuse for why all these guys are in the same place lol).

The crash started 17 years ago, and ended within 9 months. Since then no other mystery groups of monsters have been discovered.

Here’s a brief timeline of ebott from crash until now

First day: the land mass that holds ebott appears

Day 2: undertale, underswap, gastertale,, dancetale, theatretale, templetale, all the “farm” AUs, “lust” AUs and the “outer” AUs

Month one: the bird AUs fall from the sky, the nomads stumble out of the forest and the sea AUs mysteriously arrive on ship to shore

Month two, after two months, most of the fell aus (underfell, swapfell, fellswap gold) appear

Month three, the factory (mafias) monsters appear along with the “ghost city” now inhabited and known as ebott city, the capitol. A few weeks later, the fallout monsters appear and ebotts first official hospitals are created

Month four, the royals are finally brought together after threats of inner fighting, and Asgore is voted in as the king

Things settle for four more months, and the new land is explored, vary basic laws are out into place, and things start getting divided into districts.

Month five: Ebott makes contact with several other countries and is introduced to the worlds currency system. Ebotts gold, silver, copper coins is recognized as a currency by the rest of the world

Month seven, the first and only orphanage is founded for any unclaimed children.

On month nine of the crash, the monsters finally access the underground, and to their horror, they find three separate chambers housing the starving horror AUs who had no idea everything that was going on above.

Month ten, land is sold and divided, and ebott begins creating large scale farms

May 20, 2007, ebott celebrates their first official year as a country. The capitol city is named new ebott (cause Asgore sucks at naming things and frankly the rest of the royals aren’t much better)

May 30th, the royal guard is finally re-organized

December 2007, ebotts first countrywide gyftmas celebration, also an official design for the flag and coins are voted on and implemented

February 2008, the first official jail is built and used in ebott lol

July 2008, ebott is finally let into the rest of the worlds internet, and electricity reaches more areas besides just ebott city

August 2008, ebotts children and teens discover tik tok, and it is unanimously decided by every one that a standard public school has to be created

Late august 2008, the first public school is finished in city center

September 2008, the number of school sites number around 300, and counting

January 2009, ebott state college is built and open

April 2009, the ebott scouts is formed, and children hoping to join the guard in the future are able to sign up.

March 2010, ebott is opened by presiding countries for international students and charity programs

November 2010, the following of lady magic opens the temple to the public, and takes over the maintenance of what used to be known as the horrors underground. A grotto is transformed into a place of remembrance for those left behind before the crash

May 2011, the core from the stable underground is moved to the surface and duplicated into several other power factories. All of inhabited ebott is at least within an hour of power

May 2012, the stable underground is open to the public as a tourist attraction. Ebotts is opened by presiding countries to tourism

February 2013, because of public pressure from mainly farm, bird, lusts and the temple monsters, human-monster marriages are now recognized under the state as valid

July 2013 A farm monster discovers how to successfully cultivate magic crops from the underground, aboveground. He shares the secret for free, and other farm monsters take initiative to start sharing their own crop secrets. He is awarded the title of prince.

January 2014 Due to complaints about side effects from human foods, money is poured into research about safer ways to process and preserve foods in ebott.

April 2014, mellowmart becomes the largest company in ebott, finally beating out Walmart in scale.

December 2016, ebott petitions to be recognized as a free independent country to the United Nations. Ebott is turned down

December 2017, ebott petitions again to be recognized as an independent nation

February 2017 Immigration into ebott is closed, and monsters begin boycotting imported human goods. The ebott navy is built.

July 2017, ebott is declared an independent nation

March 2018, the royals declare ebott self sufficient in feeding the country when the amount of food related exports finally exceeds the imports for the first time

July 2018, ebott celebrates its first freedom festival

October 2018, the first college dedicated to the arts is opened in the captitol

July 2019, magical spars are declared the national sport after a grueling battle between spar fans and pickleball fans

November 2019, the first echo festival is celebrated in Goldenvalley

February 2020, humans not born in ebott are finally allowed to apply for citizenship, and the process for that is created.

April 2020 the goldenflower festival is organized for the first time

September 2020, several big brands like coco cola, Hersheys and nestle are banned in ebott when complaints of health issues becomes too much

March 2021, Wendy’s becomes the first company to create a monster-safe fast food outside of ebott, and after months of testing, is given permission to sell. Many other food companies follow and begin making separate recipes for their monster customers

May 2022, snails are declared the national animal of ebott, and popular snail breeds are recognized and the society of the domesticated snail is created for shows and licenses

November 2022, a different country tries to declare war on ebott on the grounds of them “stealing” their young working force (immigrant workers). Ebott threatens to close borders to tourists, those coming for medical care, and all outside companies selling in their lands. The untied nations slaps down the country declaring war.

February 2023, a new branch of the royal guard, called the NPTRF (national people’s trafficking relief foundation) or more commonly called the reverse kidnappers by ebotts supportive teens, is founded to combat the rapidly rising issue of monsters and humans being trafficked and dragged outside the country

[universaltribalsimp]

Name: Negascruff (nega + megastar + scruff)

Type: Normal/Fighting

Category: Big Puppy Pokemon

Height: 1'02" (0.36 m)

Weight: 19.5 lbs (8.85 kg)

Gender Ratio: 50% male, 50% female

Ability: Moxie (HA: Acknowledgment - Prevents opposing Pokémon from fleeing from battle)

Learnset: Tackle, Lick, Baby-Doll Eyes, Endure, Crunch, Roar, Bite, Submission, Superpower

Dex Entries:

Despite its size, Negascruff can hit like a truck. A tackle from this Pokemon can bring down the strongest of doors.

This little fella tries its hardest to prove itself to humans and fellow Pokemon. Most just want it to go away forever.

It is said that this Pokemon was once part of a trio of vigilantes. After a horrible betrayal, it chooses to fight alone.

A few people adore Negascruff, but the vast majority couldn't care less to put it lightly. This rubs the poor guy the wrong way.

Stats:

HP: 65

Atk: 70

Def: 40

Sp.Atk: 40

Sp.Def: 40

Speed: 45

Total: 300

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Negascruff evolves into Fallenine starting at level 35 while holding the Golden Belt.

The Golden Belt is an item that gives the holder a 60% chance of landing a critical hit but drains 1/10 of the holder's HP each turn.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Name: Fallenine (fallen + canine + "fall in line")

Type: Dark/Fighting

Category: Fallen Hero Pokemon

Height: 4'11" (1.50 m)

Weight: 139.7 lbs (63.4 kg)

Gender Ratio: 50% male, 50% female

Ability: Acknowledgment (HA: Moxie)

Learnset: Crunch, Lick, Body Slam, Sucker Punch, Hammer Arm, Fake Tears, Fly, Submission, Night Slash

Dex Entries:

After Negascruff acquired the Golden Belt, that's when it snapped. It forces everyone around to acknowledge it.

This Pokemon wants nothing more than the world's attention and respect. It will even resort to beating it out of anyone.

It's said that the years of trauma and torment transformed Negascruff into Fallenine. The Golden Belt was just the final push.

No matter how much this Pokemon despises the world for how it treated it, there's still a part of it that wants to do right.

Stats:

HP: 80

Atk: 85

Def: 50

Sp.Atk: 75

Sp.Def: 60

Speed: 70

Total: 420

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Fallenine evolves into Luponic at level 45+ after landing 4 critical hits using the move "Morality Punch" without the Golden Belt.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Name: Luponic (Canis lupus + Byronic)

Type: Fighting/Dark

Category: Grey Hero Pokemon

Height: 6'03" (1.91 m)

Weight: 287.3 lbs (130.3 kg)

Gender Ratio: 50% male, 50% female

Ability: Moxie (HA: Acknowledgment)

Learnset: Crunch, Lick, Fly, Facade, Taunt, Submission, Superpower, Body Slam, Hyper Fang, Drain Punch

Signature Move: Morality Punch

Category: Physical

Type: ---

Power: 95

Accuracy: 100%

PP: 5 (max. 8)

After powering up, the user punches the target. This move is either Fighting or Dark type, depending on which deals more damage to the target.

Dex Entries:

Those who break away from the Golden Belt's influence can become Luponic. It still has a rough edge, but now it uses that for good.

This Pokemon is still as big a menace it was as Fallenine. The difference is that its dark nature is used against bigger evils.

The punches of Luponic are practically unparalleled. Fueled by its conflicting morality, a single punch can knock out the strongest of Pokemon.

Despite its dark nature, Luponic is a loyal and loving Pokemon to those it considers its family. It just takes a lot of love and understanding.

Stats:

HP: 100

Atk: 130

Def: 95

Sp.Atk: 95

Sp.Def: 80

Speed: 100

Total: 600

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

In the words of Agent Stone, he's back. HE'S BAAAAAAAAACK!!

After losing the Undisputed title at WrestleMania 40 and being MIA since then, the Original Tribal Chief makes his grand return at SummerSlam! And he even came out with the WM40 version of his theme, which might be better than the original, but more on that in a little bit. I've tried making a Pokemon based on Roman Reigns a couple of times in the past… with awful results. This time around, however, I think I can say with full confidence that this is my Tribal Chief as a Pokemon. And it's my first pseudo-legendary too!

So the main thing that inspire me to make this kind is the first place is WM40 version of "Head of the Table" - officially named "I Am Greatness". It has a sort of antihero/last-minute hero vibe to me. Like just when all hope seems lost, this guy shows up. He may not be a typical hero, but damn it, he's here to help. As you can see, the entire line is based on a dog. I wasn't looking at any particular breed of dog, but Negascruff does give off husky energy, while Luponic is basically a grey wolf. However, they're not just regular dogs. They're Hainus, winged dogs from Japanese mythology. Just as menacing to humans as wolves, but are capable of becoming loyal and loving pets. The entire line also references stock superheroes with the mask-like pattern around the eyes, while the multiple stripes along their right eyes is a clear nod to Roman's tattoos. And of course, they all share the same clipped ear because nothing screams Fighting-type like scars and clipped ears.

But now let's go over each Pokemon one by one. Negascruff is based on the "Big Dog" run when the WWE was trying SO DESPERATELY to push Roman as the big face of the company and the fans weren't having it. And that's putting it lightly, just as lightly as the dex entries explain. Hell, even the name is kinda messed up. Combining "scruff" with "nega" (denoting the negative counterpart of a unit of measurement) and "megastar", it's pretty much saying he's not a star, but he's trying so hard to convince everyone that he is. And you know what's funny? I gave Negascruff blue eyes, almost forgetting that Roman wore blue contacts at the time, which is something I'm sure a lot of us will never understand.

Now things get a little scary once the Golden Belt gets involved. As you can probably tell, the Golden Band is the Pokemon version of the Undisputed title with some mild corruptive properties. Remember the Smackdown after Roman faced Jey Uso in an "I Quit" Match at Hell in a Cell 2020 and Jey was like "This title got you trippin', Uce!"? That's what I had in mind when crafting up the Golden Belt. I also thought of the same episode when Roman told Jey to "fall in line", which sounds pretty similar to the name "Fallenine". Speaking of Fallenine, it's based on Roman's "Tribal Chief" run with those red diamonds representing the Ula Fala Roman wore at the PLEs. It also takes on a more demon-like appearance with its red eyes, bat-like wings, and its ears turning into horns. The reason for that is to allude to the concept of "fallen angels". Negascruff was just a lonely and traumatized little guy trying to prove himself, but the world just shutting him down and like one of the dex entries states, he just snapped. You can only push good people so far before they finally decide to push back.

And finally, we have Luponic, which is probably my favorite of the trio. However, this is when the source of inspiration gets a little personal. Luponic is based on Roman's "Original Tribal Chief" run… which barely even started, but it's more based on how I think this version of Babyface Roman would act. I don't think he's gonna be a straightforward babyface. I think he's gonna be more of an antihero of sorts. He's still gonna be a menace, but it's just to the bad guys now. And that's exactly what Luponic is: a hero whose morality lies somewhere in the middle, but still doing some good. Its design references this even further by combining the colors of the good-natured Negascruff and the absolute menace Fallenine, as well as fusing their wings. After all, things aren't always black and white.

And now to decide what to give Luponic - a Mega Evolution or a Gigantamax form?

[tamersa]

The shitiest translation of a book (known to me) aka why Polish translation of Good Omens sucks hard

Let me take you on an adventure! Sadly it won’t be  one during a nice and sunny day with happiness and laughter but rather a dreadful and containing mad giggles. What is that adventure you may ask? Why it’s an official Polish translation of Good Omens! Look at the photos below:

See all the plastic markers? Those are the mistakes I found in the book. But let me tell you. Those are not all of them! Just the major ones or ones that offends me the most.

You may ask: why did I use up most of my free time for over 2 months to do this?

Many years ago when I read the book for the first time I felt slightly disappointed. The book wasn’t as good as I thought it would be. It was weird, because I really liked T. Pratchett books from Disc World series. Maybe because there was other author? Or maybe the whole concept how the world was built? At that time I couldn’t even know that I would quite like the book in the future, and it wasn’t my younger mind fault that it was so confused. But the translation. Years later after watching the series I was wondering, why the book felt a bit off to me. And then my friend opened the book at a random, it was page no. 382, and found a mistake there. I thought it would be fun to compare both the original and the official translation. Oh what ‘fun’ it was.

THE HISTORY

First few facts to settle it in the time line.

The book was first published in 1990. T. Pratchett was 42 then, and N. Gaiman - 30. They co-wrote modern book settled in more or less the same time as it was published. It is important information to take here, because it might explain some of the terrible translation errors.

Polish version was first distributed in 1992. It had 2 translators Jacek Gałązka and Juliusz Witold Garztecki. It’s hard to tell more about the first one, but the other was 70 when he translated the book. Yes 70! And in his biography you can read, he was mostly rewarded for his books about army thins. My point is, while I don’t know much about this person I don’t think he was the right one for translating a book such as Good Omens. Maybe I’m biased, but just because there are some army men and some war themes in the book  doesn’t mean it has the right vibes.

But let’s dive into the errors and just wrong stuff I found by getting Polish book, English version paperback and pdf version for faster search of phrases.

There are 2 major types of errors:

“Editors” (errors that are not based off wrong translation per se, just lazy editing and some weird choices of the redaction).

Prologue and 2 part switched – the book should start with Eden scene not the character names introduction. Yeah in many old fashioned books it was other way around but this is author decision! You shouldn’t switch it because it looks better for you that way!

-        Chapters with numbers that not correspond with the parts in the book – yep in PL version chapters have numbers. What for? I don’t know, because there isn’t any table of content. And some chapter begin randomly not like bigger parts of the book.

-        Lack of days of the week – It is important for the flow of the book yet we can’t read it like in the original at the begging of some pages 130-        Lack of the dividing signs between paragraphs – sometimes there aren’t any. Because why to bother.

Lack of starting dialogue in a new line – there were few cases where someone didn’t drop a new line for dialogue and I was so confused who said what.

Lack of dialogue lines – in few places whole dialogue lines are missed

Interpunction mistakes, fast speaking with the comas not the dots – so pacing, that changes the flow of the book

Splitting text in general was terrible.

The capital letters, cursive and normal dialogue – in this book it is important what kind of font property we use – normal dialogue is different than Death speaking or Aziraphale talking in different bodies. But in this translation it is messed up. The angel speaks with capital letters like Death. That so not cool for me… and take those small pleasures reading the book.

You can also see PL version of the book has distinct change of tone in the middle. Why? Because you can tell almost exactly when the other translator started to work. And well, I think they didn’t communicate (don’t know the reason) because same stuff ,same words, even same names aren’t corresponding! You will see it later in the text.

story errors:

The first translator: looks like bitter man, who wants to correct the writers, adding 234532 not needed words, have sexist wording, and sometimes archaic speech. Makes one good joke and his translation of Agnes speech is nice. Maybe because he is closer to her times than to the times the book was written.

The major mistakes: too many words even for Polish version; Polish words are generally longer than English ones and sometimes you need to add words to have the same context. But this man goes so far with it is ridiculous. He takes 2 lines of good, easy translatable text that in PL would make max 3 lines and makes it to 5 lines. Why to add unneeded stuff?

Weird figures of speech that are not funny - those are really strong point in the Disc world book and in the original Good omens too. But the translation butchered those, drowning the wit and throwing random, sometimes even archaic, lines.

Crowley name – context mistake – Crowley name was Crawly first, the demon changed it later. Not in PL ver. Form the first line he was always Crowley.

Changing the text so context is changed too: like making an island form the a mountain, or changing a word that we don’t know if it’s a flame because the description is so vague. Or sometimes it is just translated wrong in general, changing the meaning.

Archaic words – like I’ve said it was modern book in the 90’. It wasn’t written in the 60’. Also new version of the book could be upgraded. Like in the 90 word ‘weekend’ wasn’t popular in Poland but now it is. So why do we have Saturday-Sunday and not just weekend…

The vulgarisms: bit too hardcore for a book that was co-made by terry Pratchett. Real Polish language has best vulgarisms and I love them but this book is not the place for most of them. Also because when they are there we could feel the impact. But you know what? Azz didn’t say his ‘Fuck’ line in PL version when being called back to heaven if page before it in translation he swears quite badly ( which also changes context…) Yep no “Fuck”… why the translator didn’t write “noż kurw…” or something? I don’t know…

Added words like “black Bentley”. In the original that phrase was used once or twice not like 10 times. The reader remember this car is black I can assure you…

Added whole sentences: sometimes the translator adds whole sentence without a reason. It is not his book… really…

Billion in Polish is not billion or million it is MILIARD – yep, those people are not great with numbers.

Lack of sentences: too many lines before? Let’s cut some of them out… I don’t know why but such a thing happens here too. Example is the Crowley pen scene.

Context mistake with the Bentley bullet holes – one of most confusing paragraph in PL version. I didn’t know what the hell (or heaven) is going on. So I read the original and everything made sense. Crowley put new window glass with holes. It was that easy. In PL version it sounds somewhat different.

Mr. and ‘Pan’ – mister in Polish is ‘Pan’, but somehow the book uses the Mr. shortening and sometimes Pan. Why not Pan all the time? Why to use Mister word in Polish version?

Spanish Inquisition – this scene is so butchered I just can’t… in Pl version it sounds like someone told him it was fun not that the hell congratulated Crowley for the inquisition

Lack of consequent translation: Asmodeusz I Wormwood – names: this is same name in English version. Also sister Mary’s surname once is translated and later is used as it was in the original (in my opinion it should be translated so the reader would understand it better)

Kraken!! – do you know that first translator didn’t knew that Kraken is a name of underwater past and thought it is some kind of light vulgarism? I couldn’t make that up myself…

Ineffable – this word is translated on many occasion in a different way, sometimes changing the meaning like Az said it is ineffable and in PL version is “Azz couldn’t find a way to explain this” really. Only later in the book the word is translated better. And as it is a running joke in the book it should be translated consistently in my opinion.

No food joke with deviled eggs and angel cake. And it was completely spoiled. The translator either didn’t know what deviled eggs are or thought it is overcooked food and made Aziraphale not like it.  Even after one drink I thought out how to make food pun and not spoil the part…

Fell’s name – I like the small pun that Az took last letters of his name to make a fake family name, however in Polish version translator didn’t see the joke and put there some weird ass cringe pseudonym.

And of course homophobia…– and not one that Az look like a stereotypical homosexual man no… also the “southern pansy’ is translated each time differently and at least once so much more vulgar and offensive.

Killing the joke about healing the bike – I love this joke. It is silly and light but in PL version Crowley says it like it was some offense.

Snowballs in hell – Polish has equivalent idiom “hell freezes over” but translator somehow didn’t  use it and instead wrote “there are no chances for it in hell”… the meaning is lost

Being mean – translator makes some characters mean without reason

What is a bully? The translator apparently didn’t know and messed up by saying it’s same as a loser

Recycling paper is same as recycling toilet paper for the translator – disgusting

Famine – the 6 letter word. In PL translate as “głód”. So a 4 letter word. Yet the character wrote his name in 6 letter in PL version…

Pepper reads erotic magazine for teens in PL version, not some stuff like Bravo… really? Pepper is 11.. she reads about boybands and shit…. Really…

Racism - the joke about men’s underwear (when Newt answered the phone) was changed to literally “painting Chinese people white”….

Shadwell - and his hate of southern people was changed to him hating English people… why? Also his “southern pansy” saying, is translated as “ English fag” but also “funny guy”… yeah

Pollution - powietrze morowe and skażenie – one translator gave Pollution a super weird name, the other one gave a proper one. That means book holds 2 names and people will be confused reading the second ‘chapter’ and later parts of the book.

Second translator was bit better. He didn’t add so much from himself and didn’t make as much mean comments and mistranslated. His errors are mostly literal translation of the words. That means whole sentences and even paragraphs sounds at least weird but in the long run, some doesn’t have much sense at all  and sounds AI generated. But it was written in then 90. Well I don’t have the 90 copy but the translators are the same on both covers so I think it is a very sloppy translation, or one was a complete amateur.

Also the translator doesn’t understand the difference between chips and crisps. I don’t know why he thinks kids eats fries and not thin potato snacks all the time.

I really can’t write how the translation of the second part of the book is stiff and  not flow enough. Look at this:

read the yellow part… it sounds so off..

Sometimes the translator is too lazy to find a word in Polish so he uses an English one and then puts description bellow…. Why do that when there are Polish words for it?

Also why are most numbers written with letters and not numbers? Maybe it is normal to do so but for me reading the name of a number is more confusing than just seeing the number ( like writing five hundred and not just 500)

Also they had to explain what sushi is :D now really in 2019 the this book was re-release most people know what sushi is. Besides, even that description is wrong…

There are also places when you could use Polish names for stuff or people. Like the painters to describe Tadfield. Most Polish people don’t know ones in the original book. But when you use famous Polish painters the parallel/joke would be better.

The translator doesn’t know or remember proper Polish idioms like kopnąć w kalendarz (kick the calendar - in English it would be “kick the bucket”) means to die, using weird ‘punch the calendar’ why?

Again sometimes when there are citations from the song one translator keeps the original, while the other one translates it. It’s confusing but in the end the reader should know what the words means.

Translator doesn’t know that sometimes you can’t turn back(?) on the  road and for sure doesn’t know how to translate it.

Second translator sometimes also used the language calque and not proper words.

The first translator wrote too much. This one cuts sentences sometimes.

And why is there explanation what Beelzebub name means?

Ending – where is forever? – ending of the book has a warm and slightly philosophical ending. With word ‘forever’ as the last word. I don’t know why Polish ‘na zawsze’ wasn’t written there? it really takes away from the ending…

There are hundreds of small and big mistakes really… ( movie clip if I can)

To sum it up: someone had bright idea to give a modern book to 2 older men to translate, when they weren’t really good with translation, or vibes etc. The book has been butchered ant that’s super sad. It could make potential reader to not like it even if they read the original it would be fine.

I wish the publisher would hire someone re-translate it in or give it to another publisher.

I’m not someone with a degree in English language but when someone like me can ‘catch’ all the mistakes and errors, I wonder what professional would say. Good for me I can read in English enough to enjoy  the original, for all the others: better watch the series.

[ttcalzz]

Doing this all at once!!

Warning ‼️ novel below

1. Stats

Cw: 143.5lbs 🥲

hw/sw: 165lbs 😧

ugw: 127lbs

2. Height: 5’ 8”. And I would say I do like my height!

3.

I loveeee how small her waist is and how all around slim and toned she is!! She’s also my height so it makes pics of her even more motivating!

4. I really don’t wanna lose my ass 😭😭 I barely have one to begin with! Also I’m scared I’ll slow my metabolism down so I can’t maintain my ugw

5. I am losing weight for me. I want to lose weight because I’m tired of feeling a double chin when I look down, or having to wear “control top” (barf) leggings under skirts so they look right. I want to be totally confident and comfortable in the body I carve out for myself.

6. I do binge sometimes, mostly out of a sense of loss of control. When I’m really in a tailspin, and I can’t focus, food fills the void. I always feel worse.

7. My parents do not know! They know I’ve had an 3d “in the past” so I am keeping this very much under wraps

8. I don’t really have a routine per say, I just do whatever I feel like doing, but I usually do something like

- Clamshells (60 seconds each side)

- 80 squats

- 30 lunges (each side)

- bridges until failure for 2 sets and then pulse and hold until failure for one set

- 3 supersets of 10 reg crunches, 10 crunches w legs in an L shape, 10 crunches with legs straight up, and 15 leg raises.

- 10 pushups (as many standard as possible, then assisted/on knees)

- 60 second plank

- Stretching

9. Kinda. The earliest I can remember is being veryyy little in the pool with my little sister and her asking why my belly was bigger than hers. I didn’t even know what fat meant at that point but it hurt like hell. When I was a little older, I remember my grandma giving me advice on losing belly fat ☹️ like girl pls. My family has commented negatively on my weight loss before though, my dad is convinced I’m “super skinny” and “need to put some weight on”. I’m literally completely healthy?? Girl bffr.

10. The hardest thing? Probably how weak I feel. I know that’s just the way losing weight goes, and it does validate me, but I’ve always been rly strong so losing some of that muscle mass as I lose weight has been hard bc I can’t do as much as I was able to before. Planning to pack muscle on as much as possible anyways bc it makes you look skinnier

11. My fav th!nsp0 blog is probably @c0ke-zer0 , the stuff they post is so motivating 🥰

12. Lately, I’ve been drinking a lot of Fairlife protein shakes (chocolate flav my beloved) and eating saltines w hot sauce (I know it’s weird but it works). I also really enjoy salads, fruit, dumplings, rice, and 0 cal energy drinks. I will eat pretty much anything, I don’t really have fear foods, I just eat a very small portion and try to eat the most of whatever is lowest calorie/highest protein

13. I’m definitely not losing weight in a super healthy way, but it isn’t the worst? I’m hoping to actually maintain my UGW afterwards so I don’t wanna totally fuck my body up rn.

14. My ugw is around 125-130, I know weight fluctuates and my actual ugw is like 128 but it’s never gonna be exactly that every day. I’m hoping to reach it before the end of November! I only have like 13.5 lbs to go!!

15. Nope! I am not vegan or vegetarian, and I don’t think I could do either. Chicken and tuna are such good low cal/high protein foods, I could never give them up.

16. The first time I ever remembered really wanting to lose weight was when I was around 15? My best friend had an 3d and I remember googling it to see what it was and finding tumblr and…. It was all downhill from there 😭 can’t believe I’ve been dealing w this shit for so long bro I need to lose the weight and get tf out.

17. I am not diagnosed with any eating disorders butttt I definitely have disordered eating? If I were to get diagnosed it would probably be something along the lines of 4n@ or 0rthø

18. Anything salty and crunchy 🥹🥹 I will go through a whole bag of takis so fast it’s not even funny. Been avoiding chips as much as possible for this. Also candy if it’s just around? I used to have a really bad habit of just eating mindlessly. I don’t even have a sweet tooth idk why I wouldn’t just control myself. That’s not really any issue anymore tho

19. I work at a fast food-ish place, but I didn’t really eat my last shift so I guess it would have been about 2 weeks ago? Usually when I get something from there I steer clear of the “fast food” offerings and take a banana or a yogurt.

20. My favorite diet is high protein, under 1000 cals. After that idc, I try to eat more healthy than junk foods, but like I said I’ll pretty much take one bite of anything.

21. Clothing sizes

Pants: 4 💔

Shirt: small

Dress: small/medium

I always buy sweatshirts and stuff in xxxl sizes though.

22. My lowest weight was 138 lbs. it was right before a family vacation, so I couldn’t get away with not eating. I ended up gaining back some of the weight and then “recovering” aka gaining all the weight back only to be unhappy and come back to this.

23. Definitely!! I totally remember seeing magazines talking about how fat celebs were and at 10 years old thinking “but I look like that” and generally growing up, skinnier was prettier and better always.

24. i think it’s disgusting. Pr04n4 content is what made me develop this 3d in the first place. It’s one thing to post abt your struggles and seek community, it’s a whole other thing to glorify it and try to make OTHERS sicker???

25. Yes, I have purged before. I don’t do it often. But the first time i was 16 and my family had gotten Taco Bell, I ate like 2.5 burritos and felt sick with myself so I threw up in my trashcan bag and threw it away outside. Horrible memory.

26. I’m so excited to be confident in my skin!! And look great in all the outfit ideas I have planned 🥹 I also can’t wait to have a partner but I don’t see that happening until I lose this weight. When that does happen, I love being picked up and carried or tossed around, so being light enough that it isn’t a burden for my partner. I also can’t wait to have someone pick me up and go “omg you’re so light” or hug me and say “you feel so skinny, did you lose weight??

27. Honestly it doesn’t bother me too much, I work around food all the time so I just sorta go into a work mindset: look, touch, don’t eat. Food is for preparing, food is for serving to others, food is not for eating.

28. Not necessarily! I think it looks nice on a body type with wide enough hips, but on me I think i would have to be skinnier than I want to be in order to have one. Besides that (VERY CONTROVERSIAL) I don’t mind bigger thighs BECAUSEEE they support ass 🫡

29. For me, beauty is when someone or something is fully expressing itself to all it can be. A performance, a flower bloom, a genuine laugh. It doesn’t really matter what those things look like, as long as they form that direct bridge to the soul and show a glimpse of yourself to the world.

30. 10 facts about myself

- I can’t stand cucumber or celery

- I’m in school for psychology

- my birthday is soon!!

- I do art

- I have one younger sister and she’s my world

- I have 2 pets! A cat and a dog

- I love blue and green

- my eyes are brown

- im in multiple f4nd0ms (c3ns0r3d so this doesnt come across n0rm4l túmbIř

- I had a hardcore middleschool emo/kpop phase (yes at the same time)

[cxncordia]

Can I be real at 1 am in the dash?

Since I have started RPing I have discovered things in me as I played. First I discovered bleeding when I felt excited and angry and horny all through my characters. I had a rough time trying to distinguish what I was feeling. Lucky for me, at that time, I had read about different video-game theories and how they worked in media and how normally we overlay our own personality on the characters we play, so that helped me navigate a lot of things here.

Then I started doing table top rping where I realized that the engagement there is way different and much deeper than I could ever do through writing. I made literate RP (as they call it) my second home while I focused completely in table top rping. I have a whole universe spawning from the beginning of the time to beyond the end of times and it keeps on growing. All of the chronicles I've ran for the past four years are set on that universe and events that my friends have done in tables set in 2020 still have repercussions to this day.

While playing, I also have noticed that the bleeding of TTRPGs is probably WAY BIGGER than the bleeding I get from LitRP. While I write a lot of horny characters, I rarely touch myself to the things I write and it takes a while for me to get really invested in a thread this way. Unless it includes a FC that I have a massive crush on, I will engage the idea but in a very detached way. My apologies if this makes anyone who is reading this feel bad, but in all honesty, it just doesn't cut it like a table top session does it.

Now, why am I bringing this upfront?

Well, one of the things I have noticed, in both platforms, is that characters tend to be the epitome of beauty. And I get it, who wants to look bad when playing, am I right? We are, at the end, visual creatures who wish to portray our power fantasy and that comes with a free cosmetic surgery and a beautiful faceclaim. It's very rare to run into RPers who are not into their FC's and even rarer, RPers who are in it for the experience and not the aesthetics of it. Not that there's anything wrong with it, you do you, but certainly the tendency is to think that all characters are meant to be beautiful.

And that's the crux of my problem: so, if a main character needs to be beautiful to be performing as a main character, where does that leave me and my big ol' disforia?

I have been thinking about that for the past year. Well, in all honesty, I've been thinking about that since 2020, when a player at my table pointed that all the NPCs were good looking and fuckable. It made it very difficult for them to focus on the story because he wanted to seduce and convince all of the NPCs that looked good. I used that point to get away with a lot of things, usually with characters lying out right to my players' face in game and getting a pass because oh, they are hot!

This is why I have made more of an effort to include women in my tables and specially, people from very different cultures than my own as well as people that are above 30 years old. I am doing somewhat okay, but if I have to admit something is that I am not doing in the body diversity department. Most of the characters are either white or lighter skin, most of them are able bodied and rarely do I present "ugly" characters, unless required by their characterization (like Nosferatu and Tzimische).

So, where does that leave me and my 130kg weight? Am I allowed to sit in the Nosferatu table or not? Do I want to sit there either way?

And while I have been working to try and act on it, to put more people of brown skin and overweight as protagonists and main characters to my tables, I find it very difficult. Specially when I spend so much time at LitRP that depends heavily on visual cues, gifs, icons and you-name-it with actors that have to be either white, able-bodied, within the masculine hegemony and above all, fit to the t.

Again, where does that leave me and my 130 kg weight?

This is the reason why the last table I joined as a character, I asked my friend who kindly ST'ed for us, to let me use an overweight character. I wanted to create a Toreador, a clan associated with beauty, with an overweight and brown-skin character who looks like me. It's not fair that only straight men get their power fantasy on Werewolf: The apocalypse and the slim goths get theirs on Vampire: The Masquerade. I wanted to be part of the conversation too, thus I created Aristeo Alderete. I wanted to be front and center.

Aristeo, serving Toreador realness.

That said, the experience with that character was short lived. I could not construct much with him, although I really wished it, and many ideas were left out. This was not the first time I tried it: last year I also joined another table where I tried to use a character who looked like that, but I ended up leaving the table because it lacked the manners I like and I felt excluded from the get go.

Which has led me to believe that, well, I could bring him to here. Like I do with almost all the characters here who, at one point, were either my TTRPG characters or NPCs on tables I ST-ed.

But I know the impossible, regressive, hegemonic, racist and very blatantly evident standards of RP players here.

My most requested character is Rich, who fits the traditional masc representation to a T: tall, blonde, muscular, able bodied and with blue eyes. Then after him is Alden, Allen, Xandros, Alejo, Dio and Addison. I do not mind because they all cover different fantasies that I have with men like him. But Amir, Antonio, Arron, Anton, Ignacio and Arden along with Adan rarely get asked by other players. It's me who have to prop them up front and mention just how their background could fit others.

And listen, this is not to call attention to me not getting threads. I am happy and content with what I have and I have all the threads I require at this point. And yes, maybe it's a thing that I need to invest more time in: pushing my POC characters to the front. With that said, I want to ask you: how many overweight characters have you seen in your tumblr RP life? how many of them have had sex scenes or fulfilling threads that give you the feels?

I'm not gonna go around changing people's perspective on FC and what they use, you do you and all that. But on my end, I want to stop hating my body. I want to stop hating myself. I want to start enjoying the only body I will get in this life (unless the Technocratic Union decides to finally release the method for all of us to become disembodied sentient beings but I don't think the Timetable is ready for it.).

And more importantly I want to be part of the conversation.

I want to feel like I matter, despite of how I look.

[theworldvsyoshiko]

Despite everything, that put the colony over the $350k mark, so here we are. I mean, if I'm not going for Archonexus I don't need to end now, but this seems like a good spot for it anyway. The last several fights have been kinda iffy, so gotta get out while we still can. I guess it's a good guideline to remember for the future--this seems to be a good wealth level to cut and run, if you aren't pretty combat optimized.

The gang's a bit bigger this time.

Colony 2 (Study Butte) Stats:

Number of bodies buried outside: I absolutely did not do that this time. Way too much work. There was a corpse pile out back.

Colonist deaths: 3 (Cella, Da Silva, Natalya) Also, Slayer the Welsh Terrier and Jerky the Elephant.

Surviving colony members: 8

Yoshiko’s kills (humanoid): 35 (lifetime: 79)

Yoshiko’s kills (mechs): 24 (lifetime: 63)

Yoshiko’s kills (animals): 130 (lifetime: 209) So many fucking bugs.

Most pathetic surviving colony member: All of the more battered elephants died in that last fight, and the colony's mastery of bionics has stopped anybody from being horribly maimed over and over. I'm giving the award to Valabregue though. I had to scroll several times to get to the end of her injury list after that last fight, and she was within about 20 minutes of bleeding out before they patched her together.

Number of mechs: Militor Lancer Tunneler Centipede Gunner Centipede Blaster Legionary Lifter x4 Constructoid x2 Agrihand x2 Cleansweeper x2 Fabricor

Yoshiko's bodily situation:

Including her 24/7 neural supercharge, she:

takes 25% less damage from all sources, post armor.

is completely comfortable up to 97F when totally naked.

feels 50% less pain.

recovers from diseases 22% faster.

eats... probably a bit more food than a normal person, when you count in the sleep accelerator. But not a ton.

ignores 60% of environment toxins.

ignores 50% of the effect of toxins that do get into her.

eats 26% faster. (why is this a stat?)

gets tired 80% as fast.

does most labor at 151% speed.

... but twice as fast for things like surgery and making medication.

moves at about the same speed as a cheetah.

is within 1.6% of the maximum ranged weapons accuracy. If she isn't wearing the mechlord suit it's like 0.7%.

has kitty ears.

[beautifulskinnysoul]

This is a long post and I’m sorry for the grammar errors.

I never normally do this but i decided to start stepping out of my comfort zone and find others who are in the same point of life as me. I want to share my experiences and who I am on the inside.

I’m 20 years old and have had an ed for a large chunk of my life, at least 7-8 years. I think it started mostly because of the activities I was involved in. I was a competitive dance who wore very small costumes, I was praised for how little I was. I also did pageants. Now there pageants made it clear that they were not “beauty pageants”, but come on all pageants are based on beauty. I learned early on that skinny is beautiful.

I didn’t have many friends growing up, a few good ones but most of them, I wanted them to be my friends they were really not interested. I was excluded. High school started and I needed to look good everyday and I decided then that I will always stay under 130 lbs. I was known as the very skinny girl. People would comment about how thin I looked and that I looked sick but this is what I want to hear. I want to be scary thin where people ask you if you’re okay.

Fast forwarding and skipping over most of what happened over the years because of manipulation and abusive men that took over my life. I was taken advantage of by men years older than me because they would call me beautiful. At 16, a 19 year old family friend put his hand down my pants and told me to relax and that he knows that I will like what he’s going to do. This is not something I wanted but he was showing me love and it eventually lead to unprotected rape, where he would tell me “why do you always act so scared when you know you’re going to like it”, when I was fighting to hold my tears back. At 17, a 19 year old convince me to run away and I did, I drove across the state to be with him. He had unprotected sex with me when I asked him many times I wanted him to have a condom on. This man manipulated me for roughly 4 years. After countless other emotionally abusive men, I finally started to listen to my heart and I found a pretty fond woman. Now telling my family I’m a lesbian is off the table for a few years yet and my girlfriend is often upset by this fact.

Back to the ed, I would go days without eating. I felt beautiful. I was tired and couldn’t do much but I was so thin, pretty much every bone was visible and I was never bloated because I never ate. With in my girlfriend and I dating for a little over a year now she has, “cured my ed” but I want it back. I noticing my stomach getting bigger, my thighs are being to touch each other. My issue is that I’m on a sport team in college and my coaches were very concerned about me last season because of how sick I was getting. I wasn’t able to participate at time because of fear of me passing out.

With all of this I’m stuck. I don’t know what to do. I want to stop eating completely again and begin to loose this disgusting fat off my body but I need energy to perform for my sport. What do I do? I want to start tracking my weight and what I eat weekly but I need to learn how to hold myself accountable, any advice?

Photo for attention to post