#13 year old wyll; covered in blood and mentally 100 miles away and his whole world view just. Shattering
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thinking about it again — the fact that the only man who has ever actually been something of a father to wyll is abdel adrian. the fact that, while wyll is undoubtedly ulder's son (and francesca's son, something less acknowledged), much of who he is is because of abdel; the hero of baldur's gate. wyll's idol. someone he trusted, loved. and just … abdel's death was absolutely The Moment for wyll; the moment that he understood crushing guilt and grief, the moment that he understood what it meant to lose someone dear to you. i think it also laid … a very specific and complicated kind of foundation in his mind, given the nature of abdel's death — abdel, a man revealed to be bhaalspawn, a man turned monster, tearing apart and being torn apart by his unholy brethren. do you even get it
#* HEADCANON.#wyll loving abdel like a father. because he was the closest example to one that wyll *had*#wyll seeing his body rip itself apart in a shower of viscera; and stitch itself back together#into a grisly and horrifying form. wyll seeing his Hero; his Family; turn into a *monster*. wyll watching him murder and *be*#murdered. the way that abdel DID try to do *good* even when he was in an unfamiliar form he inherited from bhaal#13 year old wyll; covered in blood and mentally 100 miles away and his whole world view just. Shattering#AND THE WAY THAT HE CANNOT GRIEVE !!!!! the way that the world demands he be stoic and put on a brave face#the way his father is elevated from his station in the immediate months following abdel's death#and he is forced to smile and shake hands with the rich and mighty from all around the realm#he just watched his hero and his family and someone he Loved be KILLED not two weeks prior. and it doesn't even matter#god. god just kill me
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