#10 dollars whatever in their donations section. it may not feel AS good as when you spend on smth for yourself

[radmista]

That lady is animal behaviorist Dr. Temple Grandin, she has a PhD in animal science and teaches it as well at Colorado University. She is incredible and has been integral to improving the conditions of slaughterhouses by being a big consultant on their layout and animal welfare. 1000% reccomend looking into her and her contributions.

Anyway, are you guys talking about the winding back and forth area for the line to the register that's just filled with like candy and trinkets? Or the intentional way places like supermarkets are laid out to force you to walk past stuff like fruits/veggies and breads before getting to the coolers that are towards the back. Either way, stores are definitely made that way to tempt or "remind" you to buy more shit. Hoping that if you see if you'll think "hey yeah I probably need that too, might as well" and before you know it you're spending way more than you set out to.

I think the most insidious aspect of these designs are the sale/deal racks right in front of the cashiers. Stuff like cereal or Mac and cheese or cheapo juice. Stuff that are great to stock up on esp if you're on a budget and man it looks so tempting when you see buy 2 get 1 free and how convenient it's right before you check out! One of my least favorite traps. I tend to hyperfocus when I shop so I usually go in for what I want and make my way out, even able to ignore the racks of stuff by the cashier, but if it says sale I'm drawn in until I can talk myself out of it.

I do think in a way it does make waiting in line "less stressful" because it gives the people waiting in line something to do while also getting them to spend money without realizing it. Your mind can be occupied while you're trudging behind a line of people. Do you have enough brain space to be annoyed at how slow the line is moving if every few paces you're seeing a new selection of STUFF you could have. And if you're at a standstill, you're staring at that marked off crap long enough it wears you down and bam, get that slight dopamine hit at having something new.

There are a lot of people who have serious addictions to buying and shopping. And I think a lot of people don't realize it because they think their shopping and spending isn't the same kind as what they envision shopping addicts buying (clothes and accessories). But I've know people who compulsively buy commissions or giant collector pins or memorabilia from their favorite show or sports team. People don't consider things like OP mentioned, buying a special coffee every day at the same time (sometimes more than once a day) as a form of spending addiction.

It gives you that instant gratification and with more and more transactions made online or through card (so virtual money) its driven down our inhibitions on freely spending money. We don't have that visual and phsyical reminder of how much money we have anymore because most of it is digitized. It's easier to reign yourself in when all you have in your wallet is $30, but with a piece of plastic that has access to your entire bank account I mean, the sky's the limit if you have poor impulse control. Even worse if you have credit cards and poor impulse control, its not even your money it's borrowed or theoretical money (that you have to pay back eventually). However you look at it, you aren't technically spending your money with that purchase in the moment, and that's how people rack up crazy credit card debt. It wears away your ability to properly gage what you're able to spend.

If you find you have a hard time keeping tabs on yourself when shopping online or even out in a store (since yknow credit/debit cards), I'd try looking at your bank account balance before making a purchase. Give yourself a visual reminder of what you have, and do that math, are you really willing to spend $50 on 2 articles of clothing, $25 a piece. Do you really want it, or is it just kind of meh and you wanted the rush of spending and having something new? Not as easy when you're looking at your balance and mentally checking in how that purchase will affect it. When you're going shopping, stop at an atm (preferably your banks so you aren't charged a fee) and pull out some cash, and give yourself a limit. I know I get more squeamish pulling out a sum of cash from the atm than I would have spending that amount on my debit card. It gives you a physical reminder and anchor to how much you are paying. It helps build your awareness of your money and how you're spending it since so much of modern shopping has done its best to wear down our perception of how much we're spending.

It is really interesting that buying something does give you a high. once you realize that it’s like…honestly crazed realizing buying/shopping/spending is an addiction. I will be sitting at my desk thinking “bored…I should go get an iced mocha” like the iced mocha isn’t even the thing I want it’s going and spending money!! The impulse is to stick your card into a little box that makes a little ding and suddenly you’re handed something as if by magic. And what’s crazy is that so many people don’t realize this. I really need to have a two month sabbatical in the woods I think it will reset my brain

[the-kings-of-games]

Ship meme for Kizunashipping! (A bit mature with a section on sex)

General:

Rate the Ship - Awful | Ew | No pics pls | I’m not comfortable | Alright | I like it! | Got Pics? | Let’s do it! | Why is this not getting more attention?! | The OT3 to rule - Literally my most favorite YGO ship!

How long will they last? - Since this meme asked about children, this is going to be post series. The answer to this question? They last forever because their bond never broke again.

How quickly did/will they fall in love? - Simultaneously and slowly, like a plant taking root deep into the dirt and taking the longest time to bloom. It may be slow and may not be seen, but it is there, always. They grew up together and decided to stay together.

How was their first kiss? - Comforting. Some boy Crow didn't care much about kissed hom, and Jack said it doesn't count if he didn't want it to count. So Crow wanted one that count. He got it from Jack first and then Yūsei, and then they kissed each other. It was cute because they were still kids then.

Wedding:

Who proposed? - They never got married; it's enough that they're stayed together. Post-series they get into an arrangement where Yūsei owns a house and Jack and Crow come back during their time off from being pro duelist. They all call it home and have seperate bedrooms for privacy, but it's always okay to ask to share the bed and whatnot. Most often, when Jack and Crow are home, they share the bed because they end up missing each other a lot.

Who is the best man/men? - Hypothetically, Brave, Kalin, and/or Leo.

Who is the braid’s maid(s)? - Hypothetically, Akiza, Sherry, Luna, Mina, Carly, and/or Stephanie.

Who did the most planning? - Hypothetically, Jack. He understands quality and requires it at all times in his life.

Who stressed the most? - Hypothetically, Crow because he doesn't like spending money so frivolously unless it's food or gifts for other people.

How fancy was the ceremony? - 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 - Something low-key because Yūsei puts his foot down.

Who was specifically not invited to the wedding? - All of Neo Domino invites themselves to the wedding, no lie. Angelica Raines live broadcast it.

Sex:

Who is on top? - Jack takes the lead most often becuase he likes the control and being listened too; however, their dynamic is kind of complex? It's a lot of how their mood is.

Who is the one to instigate things? - Crow 70% of the time, Jack 27%, and Yūsei ~3%. Not definite numbers but Crow is the one who's not shy about being horny or asking about it!

How healthy is their sex life? - 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 - They understand boundaries, and nobody gets mad if someone says no. They like having sex with each other, so someone is bound to say yes. It's just like one of the ways they just spend time together. Penetration is not necessary, just another way for them to feel good.

How kinky are they? - 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 - They've done a lot of stuff together; their longest partners are each other. Jack likes slow sex and being watched as he performs; Crow likes it rougher and is a screamer; and Yūsei likes receiving and giving oral sex.

How long do they normally last? - Depends on the mood and who's calling the shots that time. If it's Crow, maybe fifteen minutes, maybe less if it's a quickie. If it's Jack, it can go on for up to an hour. If you're asking how long they can get back up though, hours.

Do they make sure each person gets an equal amount of orgasms? - Depends on the mood. Nobody is really keeping count, they lose track.

How rough are they in bed? 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 - In the heat of the moment, they might bite and scratch each other. Crow likes being held down while Jack likes to hold his friends down. Yūsei knows how to add just the right amount to bring it all over the edge.

How much cuddling/snuggling do they do? - 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 - They usually stay in the same bed for some post-coitus nap or sleep. They take of each other too, aftercare is very important to Jack. Crow gets a bit clingy, and Yūsei likes cuddling in general, though the one who leaves soon afterwards is usually him becuase he wants to get back to work.

Children:

How many children will they have naturally? - One (1) daughter. She was an accident, and she looks everything like Crow with the orange hair and the gray eyes. Her name is Sky Hogan!

How many children will they adopt? - Actively, none. They all, of course, donate and put a lot of effort into charity work since they're rich and successful now, and often, they go back to Martha's orphanage to help out and hang out with the kids. They have a lot of adoptive brothers and sisters.

Who gets stuck with the most diaper? - Yūsei. He's the main parent since he's not going from place to place as a Turbo duelist. He's the stable parent with the stable job and schedule.

Who is the stricter parent? - Yūsei. And he's also the embarrassing one. (He's a direct challenge with Jack on that.)

Who stops the kid(s) from doing dangerous stunts after school? - Also, Yūsei, but he can't really pull that off much when Sky becomes a teenager because he did shit when he was just a teen and she finds out about it. (All three of her parents did shit, anything she is nothing compared to what they've been through.)

Who remembers to pack the lunch(es)? - Yūsei. Actually, he and Sky make it together, usually the night before.

Who is the more loved parent? - Yūsei. He's the go-to for comfort.

Who is more likely to attend the PTA meetings? - Yūsei, though Sky tries really hard to make him miss it.

Who cried the most at graduation? - Jack. He'll cry at the drop of a hat for his little princess.

Who is more likely to bail the child(ren) out of trouble with the law? - Crow. He used to be a cop, so he doesn't even have to pay the bail.

Cooking:

Who does the most cooking? - Crow. Basic things mostly.

Who is the most picky in their food choice? - You'd think it's be Jack, but the guy's go-to meal is ramen. Okay, he's the pickiest one but only for certain things, like coffee.

Who does the grocery shopping? - When they're all available to do so, Crow.

How often do they bake desserts? - Jack likes the eccentric cooking. He does it once in a while, and they're good. You can also just ask him.

Are they more of a meat lover or a salad eater? - Meat, but whatever can fill their stomachs.

Who is more likely to surprise the other(s) with an anniversary dinner? - No anniversaries, they've been together since they were kids and never kept track of that stuff. Jack, however, is the one to be most romantic and do the nice surprise stuff. Because he feels like it.

Who is more likely to suggest going out? - No one really. They're good staying in together.

Who is more likely to burn the house down accidently while cooking? - As of now, none.

Chores:

Who cleans the room? - Jack. He likes a clean environment.

Who is really against chores? - Nobody gets to complain, not that they do.

Who cleans up after the pets? - Bruno can look after himself, thank you very much.

Who is more likely to sweep everything under the rug? - They were all raised by the same woman, and she taught them to do their chores right.

Who stresses the most when guests are coming over? - None, they're very open to having people come over.

Who found a dollar between the couch cushions while cleaning? - You're not allowed to lose money.

Misc:

Who takes the longer showers/baths? - Jack.

Who takes the dog out for a walk? - Bruno can take care of himself, thank you very much.

How often do they decorate the room/house for the holidays? - Not really.

What are their goals for the relationship? - Being together.

Who is most likely to sleep till noon? - Crow or Yūsei. Jack likes having a schedule.

Who plays the most pranks? - Crow. For shits and giggles.

[comicteaparty]

April 15th-April 21st, 2020 Reader Favorites Archive

The archive for the Reader Favorites chat that occurred from April 15th, 2020 to April 21st, 2020.  The chat focused on the following question:

If all webcomics everywhere suddenly costed money to read, how much would you be willing to pay to read them?

carcarchu

i've currently spent about 10 dollars reading paid webcomics and got about 60 chapters with that much. i'll be buying more webcomics in the future but if it's too pricy i'll be less inclined to buy

chalcara [Nyx+Nyssa]

I buy the print volumes of my favourite webcomics, which is about £10-15 for around 100-200 pages? Depends on the comic. But I do get a book to leaf through, so dunno if that counts.

carcarchu

as an added note the app i use to buy webcomics has an interesting feature where u can purchase "food" to donate to the author directly without / in addition to buying the chapters themsevles(edited)

oh now that chalcara mentioned it i also buy the physical copies of webcomics as well and i've probably spent close to 100ish on that

also also that same app gives u daily login coins and u can also watch up to 5 video ads per day to gain extra coins which u can use to buy more chapters or donate directly to the author

chalcara [Nyx+Nyssa]

I DID try a monthly subscription to a rather specific comic content webpage, but I don‘t like that comittment. Vastly prefer buy-once-keep-something-forever; even if it‘s just pdf.

Yeah, have bought pdf‘s of comics before because of shipping expenses.

So yeah, buy once, get something, yay! Subscription, boo.

carcarchu

i had to buy a monthly subscription thing for a webcomic once too but it was a completed comic and the app has a download button so i just downloaded all the chapters of it all at once. i could see the monthly payment being annoying if u had to keep paying it in perpetuity though

Eightfish (Puppeteer)

i've paid for comics before

I'd probably pay to keep reading the comics I love

but I'd be reluctant to invest money to read a new comic i don't know is good or not

i'd need a good friend, person I follow, or well written review's recomendation first(edited)

Feather J. Fern

I will buy physical copies most of the time. I do like having the print in my hands. If it was like a site sub though, like you can put your comics on a site and everyone gets paid a share, then I wouldn't mind because you get options.

But if it is just one comic though, I would be worried,

For example, if people were paid to upload onto Webtoons, but you have to pay like 5 dollars for reading for 1 month, I wouldn't mind because I still can choose what to read

But if for example, my comic is five dollars to read monthly by itself, I don't htink people want it

Especially new readers

Deo101 [Millennium]

Yeah i think that I wouldnt want to have to spend money to try a comic. Im really very picky and I wouldnt want to risk basically just losing money because I dont like a comic. To continue reading the ones I like I think I'd spend money, but honestly I'd probably only do that once they're complete, too. A monthly payment/subscription for a service with many comics, though, I could see myself paying for

shadowhood (SunnyxRain)

Depends. I’m fine with paying it at once to read it in one go, but not necessarily per month

Also would pay if I got to see a preview first

Joichi [Hybrid Dolls]

As a reader, I also prefer to know what the comic is about first, before committing to pay to read it, like going in blind. I prefer the subscription option to read any comic but not per comic chapter. I like to support the authors if the story appeals to me or purchase their ebooks(edited)

keii’ii (Heart of Keol)

I would likely pay to keep reading the ones I'm already into. But I would be very reluctant to check out new ones if I had to pay to even check them out. The first few pages aren't enough in most cases. I also wouldn't be averse to the subscription idea, assuming the platform isn't like, catering to a genre that I'm not interested in. Physical volumes actually don't interest me in most cases. Storage is a huuuuuge issue for me.

DanitheCarutor

Depends on digital vs. physical, the amount of content and quality. Usually I prefer a physical copy since I like collecting indie comics and am willing to pay 10USD - 30USD, I'll even pay high price for hardcover collector editions if I really, really like the creator's work. Like, I actually have a section of my bookshelf dedicated to printed webcomics, which isn't very full yet but I plan on practically overcumbering it someday. Digital copies and subscriptions, I'm oddly a little more stingy about. I tend to forget about stuff like that very easily, so to save myself from wasting money I would have to be almost a mindless fanatic about the webcomic to buy it digitally or keep up with a weekly/monthly pay subscription. As far as price, if it's a subscription I can't afford a whole lot since I'll probably be trying to take on multiple comics, a digital copy I may pay around the same amount as with a physical book.

I'm not too picky about what I would buy, if it looks really good or interesting I'll maybe subscribe to give it a look through, or buy a chapter/volume if I can afford it. Worst that would happen is I didn't like it after all but supported an indie creator trying to get their work off the ground. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Cronaj (Whispers of the Past)

I actually have in fact read many pay-to-read webcomics, and my experience has been somewhere in the middle. I think the most important thing is that the webcomic in question has the first few chapters as free-to-read so that new readers can get a feel for the story, because I wouldn't pay for something I didn't know I would like. The other things is for comics to be affordable. I'm not very wealthy, so the price of a comic chapter needs to be pretty cheap for me to invest. $1 per chapter is the absolute highest limit, and the chapter has to be at least 10+ pages. I'm way more willing to spend more money on print comics because it is something physical that I can put on my shelf, and because I know printing costs can be expensive.

LadyLazuli (Phantomarine)

No way I'd pay to read a comic without having at least the first chapter free. Even if people are recommending it to me, I still want to see it for myself first. But even then... I don't know if I would spend money on an online subscription - I'd probably wait to see what people are saying about it, save my money, and shell out a bit extra for a print edition (if that's in the cards for the comic). If a comic is free online, I feel even more like supporting it with a physical purchase. If a webcomic is locked behind a paywall... I get it, but it certainly discourages me as a reader.

Eilidh (Lady Changeling)

Same here really. I much prefer giving money to a Patreon or buying merch for something I love than pay to take a chance on something I might not like

Tuyetnhi (Only In Your Dreams!)

I agree. I don't mind subscription if it's someone's work I enjoyed but I'm more inclined to buy physical copies or get my own digital pdf of the same thing tbh

Feather J. Fern

I wouldn't mind an idea of like, you get 1 page free a month (Slow I know) but you can buy the full thing now as an Ebook or something. That system would help the author get money (for people who want to support and love their comic from the slow post rate) and great for people who can't afford comic, and read them free at the library becuase they can't even afford computers at home.

I like the print comics too for libraries, gives comics more free access

Eightfish (Puppeteer)

ah imagine if we could check out print webcomics at the library now

Tuyetnhi (Only In Your Dreams!)

there is a few libaries that are doin that

Feather J. Fern

Yes! Actually, a few librarians went to Vancaf as long as it has an ISBN it makes it easier (Well we hope there is a copy catalogue somewhere lol) And I know in the US there are a lot more librarians grabbing comics for their shelves

Tuyetnhi (Only In Your Dreams!)

yesss which makes it super good

makes me wish I could go to my local libary but like everything else here, it's currently closed orz

Feather J. Fern

Hell, from a podcast I know there is a large interest in comics for libraries, and I know recently they are using comics to try to bring more literacy to people who don't want to read.

This might be off topic I will move it somewhere else

Eilidh (Lady Changeling)

Maybe when I get mine printed I'll go see if the local library would like a few

Tuyetnhi (Only In Your Dreams!)

that is why I'm going to be a teacher. Get more people use comics for education lol

GuildmasterPhill

The tricky thing would be finding new comics to get into... how would you get exposed to them? And there are so many, how would you know which ones are worth whatever pricetag goes with them? It would certainly change the whole landscape of webcomics, to be sure.

keii’ii (Heart of Keol)

It would probably increase the demand for webcomic reviews.

Cronaj (Whispers of the Past)

yeah

And again, the first few chapters being available as a sample would be really important.

Erin Ptah (BICP | Leif & Thorn)

Put in requests for webcomic print collections at your local library! They probably won't get bought during the lockdown, but at least your interest will be on record when the librarians get back.

Mine stocks some, although it's skewed toward really well-known ones -- Homestuck, Digger, Nimona, Cucumber Quest, Skin Horse, Penny Arcade, Gunnerkrigg Court (there's more, I just can't remember them off the top of my head).(edited)

Capitania do Azar

If I have to pay before I can know if I'll like the contents? I'd probably pass, unless there was some other big incentive for me to read it (like a friend's recommendation). Paywalls can be a big turnoff if you don't know what you're paying for, that's what I'm saying. However, if there were previews or free chapters, and then I had to pay to read the rest? I'd probably invest those €€€.

kayotics

I read Stand Still Stay Silent at the library, actually. That’s how I managed to actually get into it, I felt like it was a better experience. As for paying: I will sometimes buy a physical book of a comic I want to read but haven’t yet, just because reading on paper is easier on my eyes. So, sometimes I’ll pay money if I’m really interested in it. But it usually takes me a while to get to that point. If every webcomic went to a paid platform, I’d probably be less likely to read Webcomics.

Feather J. Fern

A thought occurred to me, if all webcomics are paid to read, how would the newbies, or highschoolers, get an audience at all if no one would buy to read their comic?

keii’ii (Heart of Keol)

The under 18 creators does pose an interesting question -- are they allowed to make money at all? Would they have to get their parents to sign a thing for them?

snuffysam (Super Galaxy Knights)

I believe so

keii’ii (Heart of Keol)

As for small creators with no existing fans, I imagine they'd have to rely on subscription platforms where readers don't have to pay for their comic specifically.

Cronaj (Whispers of the Past)

Yeah, or just make no money like now

snuffysam (Super Galaxy Knights)

well, it would just also mean no readers because in this world, there isn't even an option to make no money in this world, the webcomic emperor has decreed that all webcomics must cost money to read, and you shall be thrown into The Pit if you make yours free

Cronaj (Whispers of the Past)

Exactly

snuffysam (Super Galaxy Knights)

actually i guess you could kinda get around it by making your comic cost a penny

Cronaj (Whispers of the Past)

But yeah, you'd also not have readers and be unable to build a following

Basically the barrier to entry shifts and becomes more like traditional print publishing

keii’ii (Heart of Keol)

Slightly different from trad publishing since anybody CAN still post up their comic -- even if no one would read it X'D

Cronaj (Whispers of the Past)

TRUE

snuffysam (Super Galaxy Knights)

actually you know what it would kinda be like? steam like basically any game devs from the smallest indie devs to the massive corporations publish their PC games through steam. and to my knowledge, all games on steam cost at least some money so indie creators' only option to get eyes on their comic would be the same as indie devs getting eyes on their game. find someone popular willing to review it, and hope for some word of mouth.

Feather J. Fern

Odd take, hold a seminar or not really that but a group gathering where people pay like, 2 dollars, because money still needs to happen, so a bunch of newbie comic artists and pitch their first chapter or something

Oh wait I know what my brain was thinking

like comixlogy

If you can have like a section like "New comics starting out, you can read the whole first chapter for just 0.99" then I might scroll through and be like "You know what, I wouldn't mind some entertaiment"

I think also defintely reviews are really important with this situation

If someoene was like "This art is good, plot is good, grammar is good" I woudl be like "Yeah I would read the first three chapters"(edited)

keii’ii (Heart of Keol)

Steam sounds about accurate

Cronaj (Whispers of the Past)

I definitely think that in this case, good reviews would be like gold

keii’ii (Heart of Keol)

Yeah

chalcara [Nyx+Nyssa]

Even Print comics do freebies to rustle up new audience. And steam has a pretty lenient „don‘t like this game? Get your money back“ policy.

RebelVampire

For me the answer here depends on a lot of factors. If it's a one time "bulk" purchase, I'd probably go from $5-$10 depending on amount of pages, time to read, and just overall quality. I'd of course have to be interested as well, but that's an aside point for me in terms of what I'd be willing to pay. Anything past $10 is just kind of too rich for my blood sort of thing, unless it's like a super volume or something. As a subscription, this would heavily depend on the service. How are they curating content? Do they add more content regularly? How much content do they have? How are they innovating to improve my experience as a reader and to be able to find content? How is the industry as a whole? Are there a few competitors making it an affordable option, or is it becoming like tv cable because everyone wants their slice of the pie? With this many questions, it's hard to put a price on a subscription service. Definitely no more than I pay for Hulu or Netflix. But honestly, with the state of the industry right now, I don't think the price would be justified if they made it even like $10/month. Cause as it stands none of the hosts really do anything to improve my experience as a reader and only make things harder for everyone.

Feather J. Fern

This topic makes me love webcomics more, people are giving it to us for free, and It is amazing the internet can give someone an outlet to do so. Thank you internet

Joichi [Hybrid Dolls]

If you can have like a section like "New comics starting out, you can read the whole first chapter for just 0.99" then I might scroll through and be like "You know what, I wouldn't mind some entertaiment"

@Feather J. Fern dang I would sign up so fast if there was a good subscription service like this. And same time it helps give something back to New creators!

Feather J. Fern

To be honest, if I had the money, and the power, and the programing skills I would. I would love to support creators like this. Becuase it also gives people confidence too.

[olivenachos]

Random post here but this irritated me.

 I was doing the usual, scrolling through my feed when I see a post about saving marine animals. Nothing wrong with that of course. There was a video about the amount the plastic in the ocean and a bunch of statistics, etc. Again, nothing wrong there. However, what bugged me is what came after the video and the short description below it. 

There was a long series of products that you could purchase with links. This section of the post was more than double the length of the original post about how disgustingly polluted our oceans are. Now, at first, I didn’t really think anything of it. I was like those are cute bracelets, anklets, t-shirts, necklaces, and whatever else was listed. They had cute little trinkets of sea turtles and little, simplistic wave patterns. How lovely. Then, it hit me.

At the bottom was a call to action to clean up oceans! Yes, we must clean our oceans and if you buy any of this list of products we’ll donate XX% to an organization that cleans oceans! Yay, shopping to help the ocean!

I never really thought about the whole ‘buy this product and XX% goes towards charity, organization, blah, blah, X Y Z.’ But I realize now how ridiculous it is. Why should someone profit off of disaster, calamity, etc. Not just with this particular case but with anything remotely in the public consciousness? Anything from hurricanes and tornadoes, to starving children in Africa. I remember the infomercials for the products you could buy that could “save a child’s life.” Why should I buy a product? There’s a profit margin here somewhere  and the fact is any money you spend to go towards a good cause is used to line someone’s pocket. A company, a person, whatever. 

What’s possibly more worse is that whoever this entity is, doesn’t actually care and just wants to make a quick profit. I mean whenever these products are shipped to you, I bet they’re wrapped in some sort of plastic. Bubble wrap, Styrofoam, and a bunch of other s**t that will be either end up piled in a dump somewhere near you, or dragged across the ocean to be dumped somewhere else, or just happen to fall into the ocean. 

Okay, so let’s back up a bit. If you have ever bought something that falls along these lines, I’m NOT shaming or judging. There have been plenty of things I have bought in my life that have supposedly gone to breast cancer research, saving specific animals (pandas, sea turtles, etc.) and of course, a certain liquid dish soap which we use regardless but it helps clean animals affected by oil spills (though that one has really doubled down since the spill and, again, my household would use it regardless of that). My point is that, especially on this site and other social media platforms, we see this type of marketing EVERYWHERE. We can’t escape it and you know, why not?

The transaction is easy, we get a cool short out of it, and we feel accomplished. Like ‘Good job, Jane, you did your part.’ 

But did you really? You just supported a business that supplies clothing, a business that ships them to you, a business that creates the packaging, a business that assembles the items, a business that makes the components that go into the items, and at some point you reach a farm/agricultural business (whether private or not) of some sort. And in all that chain of events, your money to going to a lot of different places directly and indirectly. And only XX% is going to charity. I’ve most often seen between <1% ~ 25% be the common range. Though, most are <10%. (Of course this is just my personal experience and there are some place that donate more!!!!)

But whether nor not the percentage of giving is high or not, the question is should we be supporting this business/market/etc? 

If you do the math, only a small percentage is going to the place you’re trying to support and the rest is to get the t-shirt, jewelry, etc. In fact, if 10% of your money goes towards helping out a place that cleans the ocean, the other 90% is just getting a t-shirt. You might as well have bought an ordinary old shirt from wherever. And on top of that mood-dampening idea, think of how much 10% really is. If you buy a shirt for $45-50 USD (without tax) with 10% going to charity of your choice, that’s $4.5-5 USD going towards to the organization.

AND YES, EVERY LITTLE BIT COUNTS!!! Some places are so desperate that even a dollar would suffice. But considering in the scenario above that you bought a $45-50 shirt, you’re still giving a party other than the charity ~$40-45 to buy a shirt that looks cute. You can buy a $40-45 shirt that’s cute from any mall just about. 

The only reason why this kind of transaction works is because it’s playing on your guilt. You want to help the ocean but you don’t know how. It’s an easy and fun way to do so. And yes, the items are really cute, the jewelry is beautiful, and I’m sure the person/people behind this has no ill-will towards anybody and probably just wanted to help out. However, they are still trying to make money. And I’m not holding that against them whatsoever, they are a business trying to do what a business does and it’s a great way for even the BUSINESS ITSELF to feel like they have done something great as well.

Though, I restate, should we really be buying into this marketing?

I’d implore you to watch this animated video of Slavoj Zizek talking about this idea of charitable giving. (“RSA ANIMATE: First as Tragedy, Then as Farce” [10:57] - The RSA, full video/original talk: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cvakA-DF6Hc )

I’m also including a few organizations I found by simple Google search that accept donations:

https://oceana.org/

https://oceanconservancy.org/

https://www.projectaware.org/

https://marinemegafaunafoundation.org/

https://seashepherd.org/

https://coral.org/

https://www.nature.org/en-us/

https://www.worldwildlife.org/initiatives/oceans

I know some of them are US based and work solely in the US but there are plenty of international organizations and some local ones too you can donate to. And yes, these organizations do sell gifts, have memberships, and care packages to buy which also feed into the frenzy, but I’d rather give my donation money directly to the group of people that actually do the work (we can buy the products as gifts later). Not to mention you could probably find more (I suggest NON-PROFIT organizations if you can find them).

Also here’s the link for the National Oceanic and Atmospheric Administration (NOAA) here in the US. They have informative news articles about climate change and care of the ocean. They also have a list of sanctuaries that you can possibly donate to (I didn’t look at them all) but I DO know that for a lot of them you can donate your time via volunteering!

Now, don’t get discouraged if you don’t live near an ocean because there are plenty of lakes, ponds, and rivers that need help too. All water goes back to the ocean (I think that was from Finding Nemo) and just by helping out your local waterway, you can help prevent pollution from finding its way back to the ocean.

DISCLAIMER: I did all this on a whim just from a post I happened to look at on my dashboard. I started off pretty upset but now I’ve cooled down a bit. Please understand where I’m coming from. I’m not trying to shame or judge or be rude, I’m just trying to be helpful and give a perspective. If you want to buy the items from any post like the one I mentioned because you like the items, you get the bonus of a nice gift for yourself or someone else AND it goes towards cleaning the ocean, THAT’S TOTALLY FINE. HOWEVER, I personally would rather donate $20 to the organization itself than buy a ~$50 shirt where only $5 is donated. It saves time and money for you. Though, you don’t get a shirt out of it. 

Of course, volunteer and be active in your community regardless of how you spend your money! It may be hard work and us introverts get super anxious when having to talk to people, but it pays off. I love volunteering even though I’m the most awkward person ever and it does get to me every now and then. But keep in mind you don’t have to spend any money at all to volunteer. Not to mention, you get to see the effect you make directly when you do volunteer.

Have a nice day!

[billssefton]

coworker is too aggressive about enforcing rules, colleague selling free stuff from work, and more

It’s five answers to five questions. Here we go…

1. My coworker is too aggressive about keeping our lab clean

My colleague, who is my peer, recently got a responsibility he treats very seriously. That responsibility is focused around improvement of tidyness of the laboratory with a focus of reducing the risk of contamination. These are serious issues that I completely support — they are not only important, they are essential. Unfortunately, since he got that responsibility I find him unbearable: he bombards the team with letters about the “lack of discipline”; he tells us we are “looking for excuses” and the effect of negligence on our front are “gross.” He decided to clamp down on some minor issues and he is very committed to that task (while he doesn’t listen to opinions on the major, related issues, like cleanliness of the floor). He told me off for the supposed “bad practice” in front of the junior staff, and his rhetoric is really intense and at the moment is causing me anxiety and makes me self-loathe and makes me hate coming to work.

I would like to tell him somehow to pipe down, as at the moment my constant stress because of his attitude makes me less focused and less productive. I personally have lots of years of experience and my work does not suffer from contamination problems. I really do not want to appear obstructive — I wish him all the best with the difficult task he is fighting — I just cannot stand the constant crusade of pointing (some but not the other) errors in our work.

I also know he has struggled for the last few years with his performance, and he is trying to prove himself in this new niche — but I am tired of his clumsy attempts to shine. I would appreciate if you can tell me how to tactfully tell him to calm down a bit.

“Dude, can you take this down a notch? Reducing contamination is important, but this is way too intense.”

Or, “Hey, I support your efforts in this area, but none of us want to be scolded like this. Can you think about a lighter-touch approach?”

If that doesn’t work, talk to his manager. I suspect he’s gone rogue here, and his manager would rein him back in.

2. Colleague selling free stuff he gets from work

I work in a library in a university. We get a fair few donations of books, some of which we don’t need (relevance, duplication, etc.). I circulate lists of disposals to other libraries locally, then whatever’s left on the shelf gets offered to staff in the building. There’s always a scramble, and there are a few who descend like locusts and snap up the choicest morsels every time. You snooze, you lose, all’s fair and so on.

However, a colleague has raised concerns that another colleague takes some of the nicer books, then sells them on Amazon, pocketing the profits. I’ve not yet found concrete evidence to confirm this, and won’t take any action until I can be sure, but something about this strikes me as a bit … morally dubious. I can see if you’ve got a huge collection, and you realize that maybe you no longer want a particular title that you picked up for free, you might offer it for sale, but I suspect this isn’t what he’s doing. Given what he routinely takes, I worry that it’s more like he’s systematically depriving everyone else of certain (usually expensive and limited print) books to line his own pockets.

I feel like I’d like to address it with him or his line manager, but that it’s not really within my remit. After all, when those books go on that shelf, they’re effectively there for the taking, whether you decide to read them, use them to prop up table legs or shred them to line your hamster cage. Why shouldn’t I begrudge him this additional source of income? (The only reason I don’t do it for the library is the time/effort involved.) But it doesn’t sit well with me. As I said, these are often the nicest books (RRP can be $50-$75 or even a lot more for some of them). Is there any action you think I can take? Or do I find another solution?

Yes! It’s reasonable to officially say, “We ask that you take these books for personal use only. These are not for resale.” You’re not offering them to people so they can make money off of them; you’re offering them because they might derive personal enjoyment from the books, and there’s something unseemly about him rushing to deprive his colleagues of books they might want to read so that he can turn a profit.

And if you do find evidence after that that he’s taking them for resale, then he’s breaking a clear rule and profiting off his access to library books in a way that wasn’t intended, and it’s fair game at that point to tell him the books are now off-limits to him. If you don’t have the authority to do that, you probably do have the authority to bring it to the attention of someone who does.

3. Employer wants my salary history — but I’ve already accepted their job offer

I recently received a great offer to a new company, and they came in at exactly what I asked for. After I accepted and signed the offer letter, they sent me a link to enter my information to complete the background check, but in the employment verification section, they asked for my salary at every job in the past 10 years … and it is a required field in the form! I was unable to enter “n/a” so I submitted a zero so that it was clear that I wasn’t lying, just declining to provide the information. I’m not hiding anything undesirable, I just don’t see any reason they would need this information for such a long period of my career, and find it strange to be asked this on a background check. I would be curious to hear any thoughts, drawbacks, or suggestions on how to handle something like this in the future.

That’s actually a good way to handle it. It’s clear that you didn’t actually earn zero dollars at every job, so you’re conveying that you’re declining to answer that question. And you should decline — it’s none of their business. You’ve already accepted an offer from them!

If they come back and ask for the numbers, you can say pleasantly, “Oh, I don’t give out that information — my employers have always considered that confidential.” If they push, then you can say, “I’m confused about why you’re asking for it. I’ve accepted your offer. Can you explain why you’re looking for this now?”

More advice on this here and here.

4. Can I keep the money if I win my office’s March Madness pool?

This may sound like a silly thing to worry about, but I’m weirdly anxious about winning my office’s March Madness pool! We are a small company (nine employees total) and I am one of two remote employees on the staff. Last week, I received an email inviting all staff to participate in a March Madness pool — $15 entry, winner-take-all. I love sports and competition, so I immediately jumped on this and returned my completed bracket.

Now, though, I’m wondering what would be expected of me in the off chance that I win. Is keeping the money in poor taste? Would it be better to donate the money in the company’s name (and let my coworkers know), or purchase something for their office? If I worked in the same physical location as my coworkers, I guess I could bring in a box of donuts or treat to happy hour or something, but I’m across the country and won’t see them in person until August. I’m not saying I think I have the gift of magical foresight or anything, or that I think my winning is likely (although the pool is small so odds aren’t terrible!) but I can’t even enjoy rooting for my picks right now because I’m fixated on this. How would you proceed if you were in my place and happened to win?

You get to keep the money. Really — it’s totally normal to do that, and it’s what most people do. The exception would be if your office has some sort of specific-to-them tradition of you doing something else with it (and you could ask a coworker who’s been there longer than if that’s the case, if you weren’t there for the last one and it’s been a long-running tradition). But most people just keep it.

5. My peer did an exit interview with one of my employees behind my back

One of my direct reports put in notice for a much higher paying job with better benefits. A VP from another department, my peer, called this employee for an exit interview. During the interview the VP, asked the employee about my leadership; if I was driving them out of the company; and if I was competent. This seems inappropriate, but what if any recourse do I have?

Is there any chance that the VP was asked to do this by someone higher up? There’s a chance that could happen, like if they’re concerned about potential problems in your department and thought the VP had particular rapport with the exiting employee. But otherwise, yes, that’s inappropriate and out of line. You could talk to the VP and say, “I’m confused about how you got involved with the exit interview for Jane — what happened there?” Or you could talk to whoever normally arranges exit interviews and say, “I was surprised to hear Fergus called Jane for an exit interview — and frankly concerned about why he would be involved in something in my department like that. Can you give me any insight into how that came about?”

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coworker is too aggressive about enforcing rules, colleague selling free stuff from work, and more was originally published by Alison Green on Ask a Manager.

from Ask a Manager http://www.askamanager.org/2018/03/coworker-is-too-aggressive-about-enforcing-rules-colleague-selling-free-stuff-from-work-and-more.html