#1 gay brain cell between them

[twee-twunk]

Listen, I love these boys, BUT WHAT WERE THOSE OUTFITS

[distuff]

Floating in The Blue Lagoon

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. . .

Summary: Another day stuck in this world, another shady job from Crowley to Yuu, this time surrounding the aware, eerie Octavinelle. What can possibly go wrong?

Inspiration: The new tweels cards- Come on nOw

Side note: Between me and u, I was first going w the faceless first POV Yuu so everyone could imagine whatever. But then I saw M Yuu fanarts and I was like fck... another fandom where I imply gay rel!! 🤧

...

"Thank you soo much dear!" The familiar nasal voice spoke behind Yuu as the tall man nudged him toward his office door. "You're such a treasure for doing this, truly!"

"M-Matte-" Yuu began to protest, but before he could say more, Crowley pushed him out, Grim swaying in his arms with the mysterious box Crowley had trusted into his paws moments ago.

He spun around, hoping to be fast enough to stop the door from closing - even considering sacrificing Grim by throwing him like a Pokémon at the madman in the crow mask.

Yet before Yuu could do just that, Crowley was already giving them a wide grin, bidding them, Au revoir~ , and, Good luck, with a little wave before shutting the door in their stunned faces.

The sound of the door closing echoed through the empty hallway in the upper tower, leaving Yuu and Grim blankly staring at the bold golden letters spelling 'The Greatest Headmaster' on the dark wood.

They both blinked, bewilderedly, as the reality of their newly assigned 'homework' fully sunk in, making them soon grimace in annoyance.

'Maybe if I wish hard enough the chicken will combust into crispy KFC.' Yuu thought, glancing briefly at Grim in his arms once he spoke up.

"Soo..." Grim trailed off, his piercing blues peered up at Yuu, who kept glaring at the door. "Are we doing this or-"

Before he could finish, Yuu cut him off with a flat voice, "You think we can pass the RWA entrance exam?"

Silenced followed his 'question' until Grim spoke again, his voice resigned. "We are doing this."

Not a question, but a statement that simply stated the fact of the matter. Feeling there was no need to verbally confirm and make the situation that much more annoying, Yuu simply nodded with a blank face.

Choosing not to comment on Grim's swishing tail or how the Hades flames raised just so from his ears as he huffed and grumbled, the soft noise of sharp claws damaging a tough surface sounded through the halls right after.

Seeing no sense in standing around and prolonging the inevitable, Yuu let out a long sigh. Turning to leave, he fully accepted that instead of proper sleep, they'd return to their dorm around one AM.

'If luck enables us that is.' He grumbled internally, 'Should probably avoid Vil for two days…' Even the mental image of Pomefiore's house warden seeing his panda eyes brought chills down his spine.

And don't let him start on Riddle. Ugh...

Yuu trailed off with his thoughts to the potential scenarios they could experience if not careful in avoiding certain house wardens, not minding the feeling of Grim's tail encircling his hand as the grey furball continued throwing foreign words under his breath.

A slightly twisted thought crossed Yuu's mind - how bad would it be to let Grim unleash his irritation on the headmaster? But before the bitter seed could flourish into a poisons flower, Yuu quickly shook his head.

'This world is getting to me the longer I stay.' He mused. Part of hin started to feel comfortable in this magical world they were thrown into, and yet...the other part still longed to return to the warmth of his home.

Truly...Yuu truly didn't know what was the thought process when he oh so optimistically thought that, hey! I have friends, right? Me and Grim don't need to share this 'experience' alone.

Attempt NO 1,

6-Happy brain cells

- Heey guys!! Ik its late but do u wanna go w me and grim to Mostro lounge?? (10:45 PM 1)

Doll: Sure when?? (10:50 PM 1)

Doll: Who TF changed my fcking name again!? (10:50 PM 1)

Deunce: It suits you... (10:53 PM 1)

Aceless: "Sure when" Are u 4-real?? Like hell I'm goin back to that hell hole (10:53 PM 1)

Doll: aight' (10:54 PM 1)

Doll: It's a date then @ Yo-Yo (10:54 PM 1)

Aceless: Objection???? (10:54 PM 1)

Deunce: I second that (10:55 PM 1)

Doll: State the time pls (10:55 PM 1)

Aceless: Dont ignore me u lil purple haired troll! (10:57 PM 1)

Aceless: U forgot that we are a group?? If one doesn't go neither does others capiche?? (10:57 PM 1)

Doll: Aight' (10:57 PM 1)

Aceless: Aight' tf u mean 'aight' (10:57 PM 1)

- Doll removed Aceless from 6-Happy brain cells -

Doll: Deuce? (10:58 PM 1)

Doll: Do you agree with the exiled dud philosophy? (10:58 PM 1)

Deunce: ᕕ( ᐛ )ᕗ (10:59 PM 1)

Doll: Good 🍵 (10:59 PM 1)

Doll: @ Yo-Yo ?? (10:59 PM 1)

- Ah yes! Gomme gomme (シ_ _)シ (11:01 PM 1)

- Was getting the wooden boat out of the shed (11:01 PM 1)

Doll: Why? (11:01 PM 1)

Deunce: Why... (11:01 PM 1)

- ...why did u remove Ace?? (11:02 PM 1)

Doll: Why are U gettin a boat at 11 PM?? (11:02 PM 1)

- I asked whether u wanted to go to Mostro lounge (11:02 PM 1)

- Me and grim have to deliver a strange box to Azul and the Octavinelle's members in the lounge said he already gone back to the dorms so boat it is! (11:03 PM 1)

- Guys?? (11:05 PM 1)

- @ Doll?? (11:07 PM 1)

Attempt NO 2,

24/6 at Ruggies

- Is anyone free?? (11:09 PM 1)

Trey: And what are you doing up at this hour? (11:15 PM 1)

- Shouldn't I be asking you that with the whole rule number who knows which and ur bedtime? (11:15 PM 1)

Trey: Touché. (11:15 PM 1)

Trey: It's Sunday btw. (11:15 PM 1)

- Sht- I forgot (11:16 PM 1)

Idia: Ortho is asking why are u snooping behind the lounge @ Yuu (11:17 PM 1)

- Tell Ortho to mind his own business (11:17 PM 1)

Trey: Uuh...snappy 🍿(11:17 PM 1)

- 🚿🚿🚿 (11:17 PM 1)

Idia: Ortho is saying "You became our business the millisecond you prove yourself to be a valuable component in the system" (11:18 PM 1)

Before Yuu could follow up with a replay that would ask the Ignihyde brothers to come down and help them, the bold letter spelling 'Chat restricted until 10 AM, tomorrow' flashed over the screen.

'Fair.' Yuu thought.

Attempt NO3, aka the last resort, shows just how desperate he was at this point and regretted the second after sending the message to them.

Die Schönheit und die Süßen

- So... (11:20 PM 1)

- Anyone up? (11:20 PM 1)

For a hot second, Yuu thought no one would thankfully respond, but alas, that ping made his heart stop, and the message made his body tensed up.

Vil S.: What in the seven are YOU doing up at 11PM!? (11:21 PM 1)

- What are YOU doin up at 11PM?! (11:21 PM 1)

The three dots were far more threatening than they should have been, and Rook with Epel sending gravestones emoji did not help one bit. Yuu saw only one way out.

Without a second thought, Yuu left the group chat. There was no need to try to ask the group for the house warden only; Yuu wasted no time in leaving his phone on the shore with his blazer, putting his focus on helping Grim push the boat into the calm waters before jumping in.

"We are indebted to you they said. We'll support you when needed, they said," Yuu grumbled, rowing in sync with Grim, who stood on shaking paws before him. "Bullshit!" He threw his hands up in frustration - unaware his sharp movement made Grim wobble a bit before he glared at him.

With just the two of them, they started paddling across the lake nestled behind the lounge, the cursed box safely placed on the seat between them.

.

The oars fell with a heavy thud on the side of the boat, thankfully secured by the iron rod. His attention was more on the wildlife startled by his outburst. Frogs jumped into the water, and wings flapping filled the air, drawing Yuu and Grim to turn in the direction.

Familiar pink and blue flamingos were taking off and landing further away from the rowdy noise.

"Aren't those..." Grim began, pointing at the grooming flamingos in the distance. "Aren't those the ones Riddle is lookin' for?"

Yuu's eyes widened; knowing the implications of finding the lost Heartslabyul pigeons, he whirled his head towards Grim. "We didn't see anything, got it?"

Grim nodded vigorously, grabbing their individual oars they resumed rowing towards the lagoon that was getting closer much faster than before.

Once the flamingos were covered by the lake flora, they started to slow down, muscles starting to strain from the unplanned evening exercise.

"What do ya think is in it?" Grim asked, nodding at the box. His paddling may have slowed down, but by the strained expression, he refused to stop trying to help.

Unable to help it, Yuu gave his friend a small smile, knowing if he were to voice his appreciation, Grim would grumble and stop altogether, 'Stupid tsundere.' He thought, shrugging at his friend's question.

"Don't. know." Yuu grunted out each word, having to put more strength into his paddling, "Documents, money, dismembered body-"

"What?"

"What?" Yuu repeated, meeting Grim's wide-eyed stare. They both paused, silently eyeing each other for two different reasons.

Grim looked him up and down, his eyes settling on Yuu's gaze, narrowing suspiciously into slits. "You had a tea party with that old geezer," he growled, showing his small pointy teeth.

If this was past Yuu, he would have backed away and maybe fallen into the deadly yet enchanting water, but the present Yuu knew the reason behind Grim's irritation.

So, to spare some of his friend's feelings, Yuu discreetly turned his gaze to the side, mumbling, Maybe...

That, however, had the opposite effect. "And what did I say about that?!" Grim cried out, throwing his little paws up into the air with the oars dropping by his side.

Yuu hung his head, sighing at the familiar dance. "Not to go?" He replied in an even voice.

"And what did you do?" Grim asked back with an annoyed voice.

Prompting Yuu to look up, noting how his friend was now standing in the middle seat, closer to him. "Hey, now!" He shot back with furrowed brows, "I'm not going to limit myself just cause you're jealous!"

Grim gasped theatrically, a paw over his heart with wide blues gazing at him in horror before they narrowed in anger. "Am not!" His screech sent the remaining wildlife scattering with the sound of splashing and ruffling feathers.

Ignoring the commotion, Yuu playfully smirked, leaning on his palm, gazing mockingly at Grim's priceless reaction. "Oh, you so are." He moved his head left and right, leaning close with a sharp smile.

Their expressions mirrored each other, both showing their own set of teeth in a laughable display of dominance. However, it was just a matter of time before Grim would- Heh.

Yuu watched fondly as Grim averted his large eyes, huffing and crossing his paws. "I thought we were a team!" Grim said, bordering on whining, "A duo!"

He won't lie; his heart almost melted when Grim turned, his blues shining with feigned hurt that still made his eyes glitter. 'Stupid cat charm.' Yuu thought, biting his bottom lip to resist falling for Grim's antics as he continued dramatically,

"Where I go, you go, and where you go, you take me with you!"

Alright, the charm was broken, freeing Yuu to groan into his hands, his whining muffled. "But Lilia's teacakes are soo tempting~"

Something shifted in the air, making Yuu raise his head, only to meet Grim's disgusted expression as he tried leaning as far away as possible.

"We can't be that poor..." Grim muttered, making Yuu wince at his friend, offering him a wobbly smile.

"It's not so bad..." He said, trying to ignore the judgmental look he was getting, adding almost desperately, "It's just...he has a bitter taste.

Yuu kept up his awkward smile, partly focusing on the lulling rocking of their boat before Grim's sour expression caught his attention. "You're disgusting."

Blowing strands of hair from his eyes, Yuu was quick to retort back. "And you're just salty."

In a blink of an eye Grim was nose-to-nose with him, growling, Am not.

Yuu pressed back, eyes blazing. " You. Are." He emphasised. " It annoys you that Lilia doesn't invite you because you're hairy!"

The response was immediate as Grim recoiled back with an offended gasp. "How dare you! It's not my fault that geezer's allergic to my greatness!"

Feeling a surge of fondness, Yuu was unable to help but reach forward to boop Grim's nose, which scrunched up in response. "More like your-!"

Yuu felt his eyes widen together with Grim's, neither expecting the music that suddenly started filling the air. Both he and Grim turned cautiously to the side, trying to pinpoint how music could be playing in a middle of a fucking lake.

With their cheeks pressed together, they instinctually reached to embrace the other, watching in reality shuttering disbelief as five frogs appeared at the edge of their boat, jerking back when the frogs began singing along to the melody.

You and Grim exchanged a glance, but before they could voice the question of their sanity or check the lake's toxicity level, something started pushing their boat towards the lagoon hidden within the willow trees.

Shocked by the unfolding events, neither of them had the time to process as two seagulls pulled back the long branches, letting them into the lagoon - too entrance to notice the subtle harsh nudge to their boat.

They could only gape more at the number of animals joining in, with the music intensifying and the boat getting gently turned in the water.

The singing grew louder with the music while fireflies started to illuminate the space inside, making the water seem like a starry night outside.

"Sha-la-la-la, let the music play, do what the music says. You gotta kiss the- gwak! "

The sharp noise of something shooting from the water cut through the un-natural concert, snatching one of the seagulls mid-flight. The bird let out a distress cry before being dragged into the depths, all in the span of a second.

Frozen in shock, silence fell over the lagoon, everyone staring at the spot where the seagull had disappeared. Yuu barely had time to blink before the chaos erupted.

Water splashed, feathers ruffled, and leaves rustled. Yuu and Grim stood rigid as the previous silence returned, thick with tension.

Without hesitation, they embraced each other, holding on tightly. When no sound entered their space beside their breathing, Yuu thought in passing how the lagoon would seem enchanting if they hadn't just witnessed a murder.

He restrained himself from glancing at the spot, which Yuu could only assume would be a red mixed with rich blue by now. Instead, Yuu willed his wide eyes to move around, searching for any sign of danger as their boat slowly rocked in place.

"We are not getting paid enough for this!" Grim cried out, his twitching whiskers tickling Yuu's cheek as the cat spoke, his words echoing in the quiet space.

Tightening his hold on Grim, Yuu cried out next. "I can't go down for a shitty box!"

As a response, both of them stilled when they felt something heavy bump into their boat, rocking it harder. Yuu swiftly covered Grim's mouth as the cat prepared to screech in fear, hoping to avoid drawing attention from whatever lurked beneath the surface any further.

With bated breaths, Yuu bit his bottom lip as Grim's claws dug into his skin. 'I just clipped them!' Was his last train of thought before his mind went blank.

Yuu's heartbeat thundered in his ears, the rapid rhythm a stark contrast to the ominous silence that filled the lagoon. The boat hadd ceased its unsettling rotations, coming to an eerie stop.

His breath, shallow and rapid, stirred Grim's fur, the soft rumble of the feline's growls offering the only semblance of comfort.

Grim unconsciously leaned further into his chest, large blues sharpening into slits with his fur rising in alert as his forked-tail swished back and forth.

Splash. Two sets of eyes snapped to the rippling water, both braced for what was to come when-

"Heya!"

Yuu screamed, a high-pitched, girlish sound that echoed through the still air. The familiar boyish voice behind him and the cold, clammy hand on his shoulder sent a jolt of terror though his body.

In his panic, Yuu jerked away, inadvertently tossing Grim into the air right as he was yanked back into a slimy, wet chest, his shirt absorbing the icy droplets that clung to the perpetrator's skin.

"Grim!" Yuu shouted, his voice thick with horror as he watched his yowling friend tumble through the air.

For a fleeting moment, he twistedly hoped that a hungry seagull would snatch Grim, mistaking the cat for a sardine. Anything was better than what- who was lurking in the lake's depths.

But such hope was snapped the instant Grim hit the water with a resounding splash, plunging the lagoon back into an uneasy silence.

Yuu's mind raced as he stared at the spot where Grim had vanished. He was too distracted to notice the two webbed cyan hands creeping over his chest - the now see-through shirt thoroughly drenched.

Only when he wanted to instinctually move towards the edge of the boat to check the surface did Yuu quickly realise he couldn't move a muscle.

The grip was firm yet deceptively gentle, with cold fingers pressing against his skin, sending a chill down his spine as they began to squeeze just so. The sharp nails dug in just enough to threaten without breaking the skin.

Yuu tensed when hot breath tickled his ear, sharp teeth grazing his earlobe, making him shudder involuntarily as blood flowed to his ears - no doubt taunting the predator with the promise of live prey.

His breath hitched as the grip on his chest tightened, a possessive hold that made it hard to breathe as he spoke in a low voice, making his heartbeat quickened.

"Shrimpy~"

The nickname was unmistakable, uttered with a boyish tone laced with a dangerous edge. There was no questioning which Leech twin had ensnared him.

"F-Floyd." Yuu stammered, his voice trembling as he forced out the name, a shaky smile plastered on his face.

His pulse pounded underneath his skin as Floyd's grip tightened, pulling him closer against the merfolk's cold, smooth chest. The wet fabric of his button-up clung to his skin uncomfortably, but he knew better than to squirm or complain by now.

Any sign of resistance would only aggravate the eel that had meticulously twisted around its prey. Not yet intending to harm only to play.

Floyd's chest vibrated against Yuu's back, a low rumble that sent a shiver down his spine. "You should know by now ya can't just come here uninvited," Floyd murmured, his voice carrying a subtle threat that made Yuu's breath hitch.

He opened his mouth, fully indenting to explain their nightly visit, but the words on the tip of his tongue were swallowed down as Floyd's nose brushed against the side of his neck.

Familiar tingly of electricity travelled from his neck down to his fingertips. The merfolk's breath was hot against his skin, and Yuu had to fight the urge not to flinch away. Any movement, any sign of weakness, would only provoke Floyd further.

Instead, he tried putting the focus on more pressing matters as the merfolk started to move Yuu backwards little by little, where he had to dig his hands into the wood underneath him to prevent Floyd from pulling him into the cold waters.

"Could you- I don't know, could you maybe go down and...you know," Yuu's voice faltered as Floyd paused to study him, his heterochromatic eyes unredable with his right faintly glowing within the dimmed lagoon.

Yuu forced a nervous chuckle, his eyes darting around as he tried to avoid Floyd's gaze. "Go down and get him?" Yuu suggested weakly, quickly adding, for a price of course! with a strained smile when he saw Floyd's unchanged expression, webbed ears twitching in clear irritation with his hold tightening just so.

Their eyes locked in a silent exchange, an unspoken conversation that sent a shiver down Yuu's spine. He watched, heart pounding, as Floyd's hands slowly slid down his arms to the edge of the boat.

The eel merfolk used it to lift himself up until he was looming over him. Sharp fins flaring in a clear challenge with dual eyes locked with his flittering gaze.

Droplets of water landed on Yuu's face, cold and startling, but instead of listening to the alarms in his head to look away and accept defeat, he squared his shoulders, his gaze hardening with determination.

Floyd leaned closer, a soft growl escaping his throat, revealing a razor-sharp canine poking from his lips. A gesture meant to threaten, to send fear through the body, freezing it in place. And yet...

Yuu knew all too well that if Floyd wanted to, he could easily flip the boat and trap him in the dark, cold depths of his domain, where he was rendered useless more than he already was on land.

But Yuu had spent enough time with the moody twin to understand his twisted sense of 'fun'. He didn't flinch as he watched the golden eye seemingly gleam even more. He didn't let his heart's frantic rhythm distract him when Floyd's longer strand of hair tickled his cheek.

He held his ground, calmly staring into Floyd's golden eye, not paying much attention to how the eel's body slid into the boat, inch by inch.

In that tense moment, Yuu could only prey that Grim's lazy brain had paid some attention during Mr Vargas's lessons on holding one's breath underwater.

Either that, or Yuu would have to find a way to win in Floyd's game without losing a limb, or-

A sharp splash of water and a loud gasp shattered whatever bubble Yuu was willingly drowning in. Both he and Floyd snapped their attention forward just as his vision was suddenly obscured by a ball of grey fur.

Grim, shaking more from fear than cold, clung to Yuu's face, his little heart pounding against his forehead. Yuu groaned, prying the terrified creature off his face, all while ignoring the irritated tut behind him.

He was about to ask Grim whether they would have to sneak into the collages infirmary again when his attention was stolen by the second twin, who Yuu notated was already half way in their boat.

Jade's smile feigned charm, which was nothing if not sadistic, with heterochromatic eyes glinting with amusement as he moved closer, using the middle plank which Yuu was sitting on to prop himself up.

Grim, still shivering, clung to Yuu's now drenched shirt, the fabric clinging to his ski nearly see-through, with the realisation settling in that they were now trapped between the two merfolk.

Yuu could do nothing but wait for either of them to speak as he was the one intruding on their territory with his heart hammering against his chest. 'If only the ghosts in Ramshackle were this territorial.' Yuu thought, desperately trying to keep his wits about him.

Jade tilted his head to the left, his eyes scanning them as they were once more clutching the other, the left eye glowing eerily, deepening the melted gold.

"Well, if it isn't the little Prefect..." Jade's voice was smooth, almost calming to the situation, served as a further threat by the way his sharp teeth peeked through his empty smile. "May I inquire as to your reason for being here?"

Yuu was more than aware of the strict policy every dorm oblige to. Every having their own set of rules and habits with only one being shared between them. The Entry policy.

Unless a member of said dorm or invited by the housewarden personally a student could only get in if send by the principle. Which Yuu was, naively thinking would be taken care of by said chicken!

Feeling his brows furrow, Yuu was quickly reminded of his current predicament when he felt Floyd move behind him, a large hand reaching over to grab Grim, who immediately started squirming and protesting about, how dare you treat the great Grim like a rat!

Yuu's mind provided an image of a trashing Grim facing a grumpy-looking Floyd who dangled him in the air like a wet socks.

He bit his tongue, knowing all too well what would follow if he were to turn around in a fruitless attempt to help. Instead, Yuu stayed still, his eyes never trailing away from Jade's inquisitive ones.

Taking a deep breath, Yuu nodded towards the box that was now underneath Jade. "Sir Crowley tasked me- us. Tasked us with delivering this to Azul," he explained, trying to stay calm despite the snickers and hisses behind him and the feeling of another body sliding closer to his right

The way Jade looked down and Floyd stopped tormenting Grim to peer over his shoulder in almost puppy-like curiosity helped Yuu ease up some of his nerves. Yet it never fully lost its guard, which heightened once more when the silence that followed was heavy.

Even Grim seemed to sense the unease in the air when he stopped trashing in Floyd's hold. Not being able to stay silent no more, Yuu quickly added in a dire attempt to smooth over the tension.

Not noticing how both eels' spins flared, eyes narrowed, and their webbed ears flattened or ruffled, he started spouting elaboration.

"I would have left it at the lounge, but he said Azul asked for it to be delivered immediately! I thought he sent notice to you guys before I-"

But before he could finish, the boat suddenly flipped over. The realisation of what had happened came too late, and Yuu found himself plunged into the cold water with a mouthful of it before he could have a chance to react accordingly.

With blurry vision and pounding hear, Yuu's other senses heightened almost immediately where he jerked away from the feeling of the familiar smooth muscles gliding over his back.

The sensation had prompted Yuu to shook off the shock and quiclky swam upwards, partly noting the smooth muscle of one of the twins tails ssliding under his feet.

Being in no position to think whether it was meant to help or strain him more, his sole focus was on the faster approaching surface.

Gasping for air as he broke the surface, Yuu pushed his wet hair out of his eyes, only to feel a cold present settle behind him with tail coiled around his feet, immobilising him and forcing him to sit on the powerful muscle.

"Our apologies, we didn't account for the heaviness of this form. I hope you can forgive us, Mr Prefect." Jade's smooth voice sounded behind him, his hands easily sliding over Yuu's arms, settling under his palms with a deceptive gentleness.

Blaming the cold water for his tremble, Yuu fight to ignore the soft electric feeling under his palm, opting to glance over his shoulder and narrowing his eyes at Jade's insincere smile.

"Oh, I'm sure you both feel so guilty," Yuu glowered, voice dripping with sarcasm. "Why did you push it over?"

Jade blinked at him 'innocently', but before Yuu could press for an answer, the sound of cackle behind him followed by something slimy brushing against his exposed arm, drew his attention to Floyd, who was now lazily circling them in the water, with shivering Grim on his chest as the twin leisurely yet roughly patted him.

Yuu winced in sympathy at the ministration, his eyes widening when Floyd's hand emerged from the water, the silver box in his hand as the twin rattled it with a mischievous grin.

"Lookie, Jade!" Floyd called out to his brother, who in turn smiled knowingly at his twin. "It's that."

Floyd stopped before them, ignoring how Grim cringed in his hold with his body partly submerged under the water. 'At least I won't have to bathe your stinky arse.' Yuu thought, refocusing on the question he and Grim wondered about before.

"What's in that box?" Yuu asked, nodding at the silver box in Floyd's possession. Yet, instead of answering, the twins exchanged a glance before focusing all their attention on him.

Yuu instinctively retreaded a bit, unintentionally pressing closer to Jade, who tightened his tail around Yuu's legs in response.

A gesture that could be either threatening or comforting settled at the back of his mind when he fought the shiver induced by Jade's low voice near his reddening ear.

"If you're so curious..." He began smoothly as Floyd swam closer with Grim tightly pressed against his chest, rendering the creature speechless as Floyd mimicked his twin's looming presence.

"Why not come down with us?" Floyd finished with a boyish voice. Both brothers peered down at Yuu who felt the tip of Floyd's tail effortlessly take off his shoes with both the twins working down the buttons of his blouse to-

"N-No, we good! But thanks for the offer, truly!" Yuu stammered, his smaller human hands pushing theirs away, no doubt letting him to; otherwise, Yuu was hundred percent sure he and Grim would already be dragged into the water half way on their way to the Octavinelle dorm.

The twins exchanged another look, Jade had his usual calm expression while Floyd was clearly dissatisfied with his rejection of their proposal.

What followed next was a bunch of chatter sounds where mostly Floyd was showing his annoyance through soft glowers with his sharp spine fin occasionally flexing.

But whatever they were discussing in their own language that Yuu couldn't even phantom to decipher, it was clearly affecting Jade as well as his tail tightened more than once around his legs where Yuu started to stop feeling his feet.

Thankfully, the brothers cleared their disagreement pretty fast, with Jade turning to him with a tight smile and Floyd huffing, letting go of Grim as he crossed his arms with the box in his left hand, enabling Grim to quickly try paddling to Yuu only to be caught by the ever smiling Jade.

"Very well then," Jade said, his golden eye glowing briefly as he began to unwarp his long tail from around Yuu's legs. Thinking he was being let go, he got ready to start kicking his stocking feet that would otherwise make him grimace if all his clothes were not wet as well.

You could only internally groan at the prospect of laundry once he and Grim returned to their dorm, which sounded heavenly right now.

But instead of the freedom he hoped he was granted, Yuu found himself being pulled into a suffocating embrace. Floyd grinned in satisfaction with one glance at Jade telling him this was planned.

With a stretched smile, Jade continued. "It wouldn't do you good to swim all the way to shore. Please, let us escort you Mr Prefect." A command that was poorly disguised as a question.

'It wouldn't do me good to swim with you two either!' He wanted to say out loud, but instead, he let his eyes fall on something behind the ever-patient Jade.

Yuu paid no mind to Floyd's hands slipping around him, the eel nuzzling into his neck once more, sending waves of soft electricity down his arms and leaving iron taste in his mouth.

Glancing between the flipped boat and Jade with large, hopeful eyes, Yuu pointed at it with a wobbly smile. "Eh..You could just turn it around-!"

He should have expected it Jade's respond, truly, it was his fault.

Before Yuu could finish his suggestion, Jade, without turning around, brought his powerful tail down, smashing the boat into pieces with a single blow. THe sharp sound echoed in the quiet lagoon, the silence only broken by Jade's silver voice.

"You were saying?" He asked 'innocently' with a tilted head.

Making a quick eye contact with Grim who froze in Jade's hold, thankfully unharmed from the flying pieces of wood. Yuu knew it was either yes and a gentle ride home with a clingy leech or no and a forced ride back to shore with water entering his nose-

"I was saying that I'd be grateful for your assistance." Yuu replied with a strained smile, which Jade returned with a much more charming one while Floyd let out a short huff.

As if all the patience Floyd had to stay silent through their back and forth was finally all used up, the merfolk submerged underwater before Yuu had the chance to see his expression.

His tail slid under Yuu's legs before disappearing entirely. Unsure of what Floyd was planning, Yuu looked to Jade for answers, but the other twin only smiled back, moving forward and smoothly sliding into the water as he let Grim walk over his shoulder onto his back, continuing onwards.

Yuu didn't know what to say or do as he watched the Leech brother getting farther away, sharing a confused look with Grim Yuu sighed. Seeing no other reason for Floyd's disappearance other than boredom, he was not surprised by the eel's whimsical nature.

With no other choice left, Yuu started to follow Jade who was already a good distance away from him, his drenched clothes not making the swimming any easier.

"Stupid chicken with his stupid tasks and his stingy-!" Grumbling under his breath without choking on the water, he was suddenly pushed upwards by a strong and refine muscle which moved him faster forward.

With legs on both sides of what was moving under him, Yuu blinked away his short-lived surprise. It didn't take a genius to understand that he was sitting on Floyd's waist who flashed him a crooked grin, with hands behind his head, as his powerful tail pushed them forward.

"Were ya thinkin' of swimming away from me, Shrimpy?" Floyd teased, his voice playful, clearly waiting for his response.

Yuu let out a tired sigh, his expression softening into a reluctant smile. "How could I when you would clearly catch me no matter what." Yuu replied, hand curiously spreading on Floyd's smooth, cyan-white skin, which shimmered under the moon's light.

The merfolk rumbled in response, the vibration travelling through Yuu's fingertips as Floyd's annoyed tut finally drew his attention back to his face. Yuu only saw Floyd's furrowed brows just as webbed hands grasped his and pulled him closer.

Sprawled over Floyd, his nose barely brushing against Yuu's forehead. "Ya wouldn't make the chase boring though, right Shrimpy?" Floyd asked in a low voice, his other hand brushing Yuu's hair behind his ear, claws lightly grazing his sensitive skin, sending shivers down Yuu's spine. "I know you wouldn't, right?"

Yuu swallowed nervously, his wide eyes meeting Floyd's duals. The golden eye seemed to glow brighter under the open starry night. Knowing one wrong move or word could trigger a different mood with a different response where Yuu would either end up safely on the shore or drowned in the peaceful lake.

He couldn't help the relieved sighed when Jade's stern voice interrupted the charged air between them. "Floyd."

Floyd's gaze dropped, lazily meeting his twin's disapproving stare. "I thought you wanted him to enjoy the ride back in peace." Jade reminded him.

Yuu and Grim exchanged wary glanced, their eyes darting between the two Leech brothers, settling on Floyd's sharp grin which grew as he locked eyes with Jade.

Without another word, Floyd lowered his head on the water's surface, his teal hair fanning out as he swam just a little faster, ahead of his brother.

"Ya never asked for my definition of peace, now did ya." Floyd quipped cheekily. Jade easily let his twin have the last word, recognising that his brother's appetite for chaos was, for the moment, satiated.

Knowing what the other Leech brother did, Yuu waved his hand to gain Jade's attention, which the more composed twin immediately gave.

A brief but genuine smile crossed his lips as Yuu mouthed a silent, thank you. Jade nod in respond, redirecting his focus to the path ahead.

Determined to maintain the fragile peace, Yuu subtly motioned for Grim to stay quiet. The little feline rolled his eyes with a huff as he crossed his paws, but wordlessly complied. Not daring to challenge the Leech twins' unpredictable nature.

Satisfied, Yuu turned his attention forward, observing Floyd's unexpectedly peaceful expression. Here he was, sitting on a merfolk, a being capable of tearing him to pieces, snapping his bones as if made of porcelain.

Yet instead, Floyd had chosen to help with his brother. To protect, in their own twisted way.

'Even if you may be seen as morally grey, selfish, animalistic and twisted. I...' Yuu thought, his fingers absently tracing the smooth skin, barely feeling the hidden scales. 'I can't help but admire the authenticity of your actions.'

Be it the Leech twins, Azul or other students he met in NRC Yuu never felt he was being lied to. Tested or even secretly deceived. Hell! The trio never hid their scheming nature when they tried luring students into making deals.

'This place truly lives up to its name.' Heh. A bitter smile tugged at Yuu's lips when, instead of the expected fear, disgust or resentment, all he could feel was...peace.

Throughout their serene ride, Yuu couldn't help but return to the same old thought. Was this world changing him, or was he letting it change him?

How long until he would fully forget about returning back to his home, to his family and life? How long until he would stop fighting the pull and let himself drown in the murky waters.

Yuu felt his eyes dim with each question, hands fisting before he willed them to relax. He truly needed sleep.

.

The journey back to shore was much quicker with the twins' assistance than when he and Grim rowed on their own.

The moment they reached the dark-sandy beach encircling the lake, both Floyd and Jade swam as close as possible allowed them to, their massive forms gliding effortlessly though the water.

As soon as they hit the shallows, the brothers settled on the sand, allowing Yuu and Grim to slide down.

Wasting no time in staying longer than needed, Grim leapt from Jade's back, muttering a quick, Thanks! Just as Yuu drilled into him, scurrying to the safety of the shore, far from the water's edge.

Yet when it was his turn, he didn't get far. Choking on his thanks, Yuu stumbled forward with a jolt of fear travelling through him when a webbed hand clasped around his ankle, causing him to crash to the sand.

Heart pounding, Yuu instinctively braced himself for the fall, intending to turn and yell at Floyd. But before he could, the merfolk was already flipping him over with ease, his golden eye glinting with playful malice.

"Floyd, what the hell-" Yuu's words died in his throat as he saw the sharp, glinting teeth inching closer to his foot. His breath quickened, and a primal fear gripped him. He squeezed his eyes shut, bracing for the painful feeling of teeth tearing into flesh.

But instead of pain, he felt a strange, tickling sensation. Confused, Yuu slowly opened his eyes to find Floyd nibbling on his ankle, his sharp teeth grazing the skin without breaking it.

A familiar heavy feeling of guilt settled on his heart as he watched Floyd finish his ministration that was probably meant as a goodbye for him, tail softly thumbing behind the brother as he gave him a large grin, oblivious to what Yuu thought he would do.

'And right after I thought you shouldn't be seen as mindless monsters.' Guess old habits do die hard, Yuu thought solemnly. He is still not used to some of the 'cultural' differences between his world and theirs it seemed.

"Let's play like this again soon, alright?" Floyd's question interrupted Yuu's self-demeaning thoughts, his voice unusually soft, but with an undeniable edge to it.

His tail flicked water playfully onto the shore with Jade next to his twin, silently regarding Yuu with an unsettling intensity, his duals gleaming with an eagerness that could be seen as a predatory curiosity from a different angle.

"Please take care and get home safe, Mr Prefect." Jade said, his expression already washed down by his empty smile as he respectfully bowed his head while his twin nodded vigorously, his expression equally unreadable.

"Hai, hai! The land is far more dangerous than water anyways." Floyd followed, his usual playful demeanor fading into something more serious. "If ya get into trouble, don't hesitate to jump here."

"I'm sure we could make an...expectation for you if you're in dire danger." Jade added, slowly moving closer. Yuu's eyes shifted between the two twins, whichever spoke, noting that both were now looming over him on each side.

Yuu took into account their uncaring nature, reasoning no matter how long they lived ashore, they wouldn't care for something obvious like personal space.

"Azul might even allow you to stay in Octavinelle for a while too..." Floyd said next, bending so his duals with his gleaming gold would easily lock with Yuu's hesitant gaze that slowly melted into a more interested look.

"Indeed..."Jade followed next, mirroring his twin's posture as well as expression, "For a price, of course. But don't fret, it won't be too hefty, I promise you that our little Prefect."

Yuu felt the weight of their gazes, the two pools of melted gold gleamed with a mix of amusement and something more possessive.

He barely registred the feeling of their webbed hands - one gentle, the other more forceful - clasping his own, nor did he hear Grim's muffled panicked cries.

All Yuu could focus on was the two glowing golds and the subtle pressure of being pulled back towards the water when an arrow suddenly whizzed through the air, landing inched from Yuu's groin, easily pushing the two eels from him.

The shared shock between them broke whatever chain was encircling Yuu's neck, making all three turn their heads sharply in the direction the arrow that nearly castrated him had come from.

Yuu's breath hitched, the low sound of growls ignored as his brain settled on far greater danger than those two merfolks' that retreated further into the waters.

There in the distance, a familiar figure marched towards them with a scowling expression and scary speed, considering the heels that seemed sharper than usual.

The peaceful night was shattered. Without a second thought, Yuu scrambled to his feet, the adrenaline surging through his veins as his eyes locked with blazing amethysts; Grim's loud voice going ignored as he shouted, Rook!?

Yuu couldn't decipher whether it was from excitement or fear as his friend pointed up at the trees with heavy foliage, his attention solely on,

"V-Vil! What are you doing here at this fine hour?" Yuu stammered, his voice trembling slightly as the blond bore down on him. Vil seemed like a man on a mission, his dress robe adorned by fur fluttering behind him like a royal robe.

Seeing movement in his peripheral vision, Yuu quickly glanced to the side, seeing the two twins slowly sliding away from him before his focus was turned back due to the familiar scent of caramel apple engulfing his senses.

"Fine? Fine, you say," Vil's voice was low, dangerously calm, with an edge that sent chills down Yuu's spine that was not from the wind brushing against his drenched state.

Suddenly, the taller teen grabbed Yuu by the collar, yanking him closer, their faces mere inches apart. "Do you have any idea what time it is?" Vil demanded, his amethysts burning with a fury that Yuu felt only he was privileged to see from the 'perfect' male standing before him.

Yuu forced an awkward smile at his senior, raising his hands in surrender. Out of the corner of his eye, Yuu caught sight of Epel, panting heavily as he tried to catch his breath.

The lavender-haired boy who was bent over still found the strength to furiously shake his head with a paled expression, motioning with his thumb a cutting gesture over his neck.

But Yuu, despite knowing better, couldn't stop himself from speaking. "Somewhere around eleven-"

"Twelve. Thirty. AM." Vil's voice cut through the night like a blade, dripping with venom from the usually composed 'Queen' of Pomefiore.

Feeling the unusual statick in the air, Yuu willed himself to take a deep breath in, scanning Vil's flawless face that was adorned with faint lines of stress.

His heart sank at the thought that he was the cause of the blond's distress. Eyes softening, Yuu opened his mouth in an attempt to soothe the blond, but before he could say anything, Vil huffed a shaky smirk, speaking of Yuu's inevitable doom.

Too slow to react, Vil turned on his heel, tugging Yuu forward with surpsiing force. Tumbling over his stocking feet, Yuu tried to regain his balance, but Vil didn't give him the chance.

With a firm grip on the back of Yuu's drenched shirt, Vil marched forward, dragging him along the ground like a beat-up plushy that was about to get thoroughly washed.

The pompous 'Queen' whistled a short tune as they passed Epel, who had just caught his breath only to realise he had to go through all that again.

However, before he could ask his friend why he was even out here, his head snapped to familiar yowl of Grim. Scanning his around where he heard him, Yuu didn't had much time to pin point where he was as Vil's voice dragged his attention back to him.

"Going on some evening endeavour this late at night, leaving the chat and then daring not to answer any of the calls. I hope you know I expect you to sit obediently once we get back to Pomefiore and not make a peep while I try to save this disaster."

Vil looked over his shoulder, peering down at Yuu with amethysts that gleamed with the promise of punishment if defiance were to be noticed.

Feeling wronged for nothing, Yuu stupidly tried to explain his and Grim situation before Vil's tense voice easily cut through his voice. "Do you understand?"

Wide eyes searched the hardened violet gems before he let out a long sigh. Slumping his shoulders, Yuu replied with a short, aye, sir.

Clearly satisfied with his respond, Vil humped as he continued listing all that they would have to go through to ensure neither of them would get dark circles or dry skin once they woke up.

Hearing the torture they would have to go through, his eyes swiftly locked with Epel's wide ones, I expect full compensation the boy's gaze said which made Yuu promptly snap his attention at his only salvation.

Yet when his fearful eyes met two pairs of duals shining with sadistic mischiefs in the moonlit night, he found no solace - only the eerie, synchronised wave of the two merfolk, making Yuu rethink his previous thought before all this.

'I take it all back. All of you are sadistic bastards!'

---

Thank you all for reading! I hope ya enjoyed yourself. Pls don't be shy to comment any of Ur thoughs or leave a like. It was fun to write!

[ohanny]

I've been waiting for this show since last year because they kept marketing it as poly and I won't let them cop out because if they do I will set something on fire so here's my personal step by step plan on how we get these three together:

1. Seiji, who has been shown to be really decisive about his moves, pursues Ken who is way more cautious and turns him down because Ken really fucking wants to but NEEDS this job and he's scared and Seiji is bummed but he gets it and gah all the sexual tension on stage.

2. Enter Pan and basically where we are when the show starts and Ken realizes he might have fucked up and underestimated exactly how many feelings he has.

3. Ken confronting Seiji about his thing with Pan with a "It is forbidden, the laminated rule board says so" and Seiji is all "Oh for fucks sake grow up, Ken" and when Ken looks at him like a hurt puppy "But -" Seiji is like "But what? Was I supposed to wait for you forever?" before walking off.

4. Ken corners Pan in some broom closet or whatever. Pan's like "Uh?" and Ken's like "Seiji. He's not some fun thing you can experiment with, okay? So if this is like some gay awakening or whatever -" and Pan's like "It's not! I really like him, okay!" and he's all defensive and genuine and then a bit baffled because Ken looks... sad? And then Ken looks at him with his big wet brown eyes all "Good. You have no idea how lucky you are" and walks off and Pan is like "... huh?"

5. Pan goes to Seiji like "I know this is none of my business but it was kinda made my business so uh... is Ken your ex or something?" and Seiji is suspicious all "What the fuck did he say to you?" and Pan is like "He just wanted to make sure I was being serious and I am!" (Seiji smirks and Pan blushes) "But then he got a bit weird and just... told me how lucky I am to have you?" And then Pan watches Seiji get that same kinda sad look in his face before shaking his head and wrapping his arm around Pan with "Nah, we never had anything. He's just being Ken."

shockingly step 6 might involve Pan having ALL the brain cells because 6. Pan as a professional university dude shipper internet kid being able to do the math about this weird pining + sexual tension going between Ken and Seiji. And then he has to have a moment of introspection because a) he hates all the girls hanging all over Seiji but b) he does not hate watching Seiji and Ken be all over each other on stage. So maybe to test this out, he invites Ken to crash his planned date with Seiji and he's all "Oh, he's your best friend! We should all hang out together!"

7. Them getting drunk in some bar and Seiji getting handsier by the minute and Ken is like "Yeah, I'm just gonna head home ._." and Pan is like "Booooo, don't you like me?" and Ken's like "I like you kiddo but I really don't need to see this" and Pan pouts because he's a baby and then he suddenly grins and jumps up all "You can't leave before a good night kiss!" Before Ken can do much, Pan plants a big one right on his lips and then shoves Ken at Seiji like "Seiji too!" And Seiji is smirking a bit because when does he not and also Pan is adorable but then Ken is at his face with those big brown eyes and suddenly it's not all that funny anymore? And then Ken is kissing him, soft and careful and oh and Pan's like "Oh yeah. I am definitely into this. Noice."

8. Nothing more happens because well, Pan is drunk as fuck and Ken is a gentleman and all but next morning when Pan wakes up in bed with Seiji, Seiji's like "So how much of last night do you remember?" and Pan's like "Kissing Ken... oooh I remember" and when Seiji's like ... Pan is like "Oh come on. Don't tell me you don't want to?" and when Seiji's like "It's not that simple" Pan is like "It actually is if you're not dumb about it" and Seiji's like "I think Ken was wrong. I'm lucky to have you" and Pan's like "BOTH of you are, I am amazing!"

9. Pan showing up at Ken's door all "Hi! I am here to take you out!" and Ken's like ".... I am so confused right now? Where's Seiji?" and Pan's like "Working on his abs with Great which means I am bored and since I would rather die than go on a stairmaster, I decided we will get to know each other better!" and Ken just.... goes with it because he seems like a pretty chill dude although he is kinda moving with the energy of someone expecting a bomb to drop and then at the end of the evening Pan's like "Let me take you home" and Ken's like "That's Seiji's place?" and Pan's like "Yeah, I don't really put out until the third date but Seiji totally does and I wanna test my hypothesis on exactly how much I like to watch you two... unless you don't want to! In which case we can just... watch a movie or something!" and Ken's like oh fuck it and kisses Pan who fist bumps in glee and god it's so dumb but also adorable.

10. They live happily ever after and all love each other and shower together and save TWICE as much water like the environmentally friendly gays they are, the end.

[kimbapisnotsushi]

hey all welcome to me rating hq schools based on how homophobic they are on completely arbitrary-not-arbitrary rules LET’S GET IT

(i feel like i need to clarify that high score = not at all homophobic and that low score = disgustingly homophobic hope that helps!!)

karasuno: 1000000/100000 i’m including BOTH teams in this to represent the whole school boys’ vbc i don’t even think i have to cite reasons BUT girls’ vbc i just know that poor little underclassman had a heart attack when michimiya grabbed her face like that

seijoh: i’m going to take off a point right off the bat bc i wanted to deck oikawa so bad the first time i saw him. 9/10 the day is saved because kyoutani and yahaba put so much yearning into that one panel and also because kindaichi has multiple breakdowns over what kageyama means to him every few days or so. kunimi would commit gay-on-gay crime but i’ll allow that he has the right to

date tech: i know for a fact we’ve all been kogane at some point in our lives and also i’m pretty sure all the first and second years were in love with moniwa at some point. onagawa’s nickname is pantalones. aone hyper focuses on the aces of rival teams. having nametsu as a manager is mlmwlw solidarity. 4/10 i took points away because futakuchi is a little bitch and isn’t afraid to show it and would accidentally come across as homophobic in the process when he isn’t

shiratorizawa: see this is tough bc tendou reads all that shounen and semi is SO gender and probably holes himself up in the dorm writing song lyrics about having the biggest crush on tendou and also goshiki and shirabu are obviously pining for their upperclassmen but ushijima has some SERIOUS repression going on and washijou looks like he’d say that being gay is a disease BUT i do think he’s open to learning so like. 6.5/10?

johzenji: they have cute nicknames for each other AND i think they’d kiss the homies good night. also terushima fell in love with daichi within the span of fifteen seconds. 7/10 i took away points because they think saying “no homo” while holding hands stops it from being homo

kakugawa: komaki, asamushi, and minamida all rotate the brain cell between them. they all look like middle schoolers next to hyakuzawa to the point where i keep forgetting they’re not. komaki does the glasses push so i’m giving extra for that. 7.5/10 because when hyakuzawa comes out to them they freak out (out of concern and trying to figure out how to best handle it!) and then freak hyakuzawa out so everyone is just freaking out for a full five minutes

wakunan: nakashima and tabi deserved SO MUCH MORE also i love tabi’s hair so 11/10 the extra 1 is for their break down

nekoma: 1000000.5/10 mostly because i’m biased but hello???? we have DIVERSITY here we can go rivals to lovers AND childhood friends to lovers AND friends to lovers all in one team. nekomata is self-explanatory. the .5 is because i already mentioned before that lev would be such a top tier ally if he wasn’t already swooning over kenma and yaku

fukurodani: akaashi will go on tangents about how historians will say they were just best friends. whenever yukie and kaori cuddle in front of everyone konoha makes gagging noises bc of how sickeningly sweet they are. it’s funny but i’ll be taking points off for that and also because bokuto once got the school computers infected with a virus trying to google “two guys making out”. 2/10

shinzen & ubugawa: i’m putting them together bc daiki and masaki are in love and eri and mako are in love. they go on double dates all the time and also chigaya is a bro he gets trusted with all the secret “dude i think i’m _____” talks and never tells a single soul about them 100/100

itachiyama: iizuna is the mlm awakening at itachiyama. iizuna was SAKUSA’S awakening. komori and sakusa fight because they say can’t both be the gay cousin. whenever iizuna interrupts their bickering they call him homophobic. 9/10 i subtracted a point because their uniforms make me want to claw my eyes out

nohebi: we all know daishou had a thing for kuroo way back when so like. also have you seen hiroo’s hair? those bangs are emo as hell what even is that. 8/10 because they’ll be homophobic against other teams in the middle of the goddamn game to bait them and the only reason they haven’t lost MORE points for that is bc i love kuguri

inarizaki: -117478492/10 i’ll fight miya atsumu myself. i don’t think he’s homophobic he just pisses me off sometimes

kamomedai: they get 475828929392/??? just because i love them so much

mujinazaka: usuri instills fear and admiration in me. also unann and mami are basically an old divorced couple who want to get back together but don’t know how to. honda probably gets shit on a lot for having his whole entire name sounding like car dealerships. ezo is the only one with a brain cell and for that i’ll give 8.5/10

niiyama: maiko doesn’t even know there are labels for it she just thinks girls are pretty and she’d kill for them 500/10

tsubakihara: the headbands are really cute and i like their motto 100/100

[dumbass-duo-showdown]

DUMBASS DUO SHOWDOWN ROUND 1 BATTLE 16

Bender & Fry (futurama) vs Porsche & Pete (kinnporsche)

REMINDER TO CHECK OUT THE PROPAGANDA UNDER THE CUT BEFORE VOTING!

Fry & Bender

they don’t know anything. Fry tells Bender that “there is no such thing as two” as in the number two. Bender regularly forgets that humans have needs or emotions. they joined the army to get discounted gum. they regularly engage in Antics.

Porsche & Pete

They’re very silly. One scene where Pete helps Porsche learn about his bf’s ex and they use code names even though there’s only two of them. When they first meet Pete is dancing around their room with no pants on.

Porsche and Pete are roommates, best friends, and bodyguards for the mafia. They have a single brain cell between them. Porsche: Tried to put a fire out by pouring alcohol on it. Brought a bottle of pee to a knife fight and somehow won. Didn't realize his boss was gay despite repeatedly driving his bootycalls home at 2am. Got drunk, made out with his boss, and then forgot. Used a dildo as a protection charm against ghosts. Accidentally threw said dildo at his boss's face. Pete: Does his morning workout naked from the waist down. Thought Porsche's hickies were from getting repeatedly punched in the neck. Came home and fell asleep without realizing Porsche was having sex in the same room. Tried to secretly follow a mob boss by hiding behind poles. Got kidnapped. Had kinky sex with his kidnapper because the kidnapper's hedgehog died and he felt bad for him.

[tokuteasings]

Have any general headcanons for mbjr brotps?

YOU FUCKING KNOW IT BECAUSE I LOVE THEM SO MUCH THAT I CANNOT SHUT THE FUCK UP ABOUT THEM-

This is going to be centered within MBJR themselves but if you wanna ask about BroTPs outside of MBJR, lemme know~! I can go on and on about these guys and how Aruto basically has tried to adopt them and the YuaNaki brotop and the IkaAruto brotp listen i got so much

Of course, we know Jin and Horobi are close as father and son but Horobi and Ikazuchi are these two absolute adult figures but while Horobi has mostly a level head, Ikazuchi is a bit more brash. He will jump to defend Horobi and Horobi has to physically hold him back. But honestly, these two are these older kindred souls that go out and just sit under a tree and look at the stars and talk philosophical things. Ikaika also tries to get Horobi out of Daybreak Town more and thus, tends to invite him to his workplace and planetarium. Subaru is always happy to see him and even though Horobi is slightly hesitant to get to know Subaru, he warms up to him and basically signed the adoption papers. In return, Horobi reminds Ikazuchi to relax and visits to "check up on him"

Horobi and Naki on the other hand are the two parents of MBJR. They tend to sit in silence most of the time and simply enjoy each other's company and often share books and things of the sort. IT's like a mini book club between them. Because of my headcanons that Horobi knits, he gives Naki a sort of scarf even though they don't need it. It's his silent way of showing that he cares. Naki is Horobi's reminder to take time to himself and relax, to enjoy life and if anything...Naki wants to help Horobi find a "dream" even if it's something small. It's one step at a time. Horobi is also fiercely protective of Naki as is Naki of Horobi and while all of MBJR would shoot Gai on sight, Horobi is rushing to get to his ass first just to stab him.

Ikazuchi and Naki share exactly one (1) brain cell and Naki has it most of the time. Ikazuchi is only allowed to have it because he's planning something that could either cause some sort of chaos or he's driving. He tends to rope Naki into dumb things (like how they tore off Gai's clothing) and records these moments to share in the MBJR group chat or to Aruto and Yua. These two are highly competitive with one another and Ikazuchi triggers Naki's feral brain half of the time. Don't let them play Mario Kart together because they can and will yell at each other. Naki on the other hand, is Ikazuchi's restraint half of the time but because they're being...influenced by Ikaika and Fuwa...sometimes they willingly join Ikazuchi on his escapades. Subaru is roped into this most of the time as well.

Naki and Jin on the other hand is more so Naki is the dotting sort of person who reminds Jin to take care of himself and Jin just replies with this cute, "I know~!" if Horobi is a hands-off but caring parent. Jin visits Naki at A.I.M.S often, just to hang out and chat and sometimes with Yua as well. He brings lunches for the humans and a new book for Naki to read. Compared to sitting in silence, Jin is always sitting in a chair beside Naki just watching them work oro stealing Naki's jacket because, "It's unfair that Naki has all the cool clothing!!!" and honestly, these two trade clothing the most out of all of MBJR.

Ikazuchi and Jin are just begging for trouble. Ikazuchi can restrain himself half of the time but most of the time, these two are egging each other on when it comes to like the dumbest fucking shit. Ikazuchi is bringing out his motorbike? Jin asks how fast he can drive that thing vs his own flying and suddenly you hear Yua being called up because those two got pulled over by some cops. But if anything, Ikazuchi is the person Jin goes to for spontaneous shopping trips. Sure he can ask for Horobi and he often does but Ikazuchi (and his knowledge of human things is better than the other's) knows things that Horobi doesn't and Ika is like friends with a lot of vendors and thus, they warm up to Jin too.

They all have made a "Subaru Protection Squad" because Subaru tends to visit Daybreak often whenever he isn't busy. He's still working out his own Singularity but with Ikazuchi by his side, he's gotten a lot better in understanding it. He went to MBJR to understand more about it and Horobi has basically adopted him. Sometimes Subaru makes deliveries to Naki just for the excuse to hang out with them and Jin is always barging into Subaru's personal space just to tackle him into a hug.

Now that Horobi and Jin have a much healthier relationship, Jin actively calls Horobi his father in public. Horobi also has begun collecting magnets since Jin draws a lot and hangs his drawings on the wall with the said magnets but has this framed picture of all of MBJR (Subaru included) on the wall as well.

[aria-ashryver]

I have never actually asked, but maybe you could share something about your original work? 👀 Not necessarily all the details, but a brief overview or your favourite part of it so far?

Oh. Oh what a can of worms you just opened lmao. Thank you my love, so very much, for asking.

Look gang, I’m writing a book series!

⚔️🌩️The Stormsinger Chronicles🌩️⚔️

Growing up, I always wanted to escape into fantasy novels. I wanted to be the knight, and the princess, and the dragon. But I wanted to read something that wasn’t Ye Olde Medieval England or Gritty America But With Magic. I wanted to find a place closer to home, you know?

Cue the Stormsinger Chronicles.

In a world where magic has been strictly prohibited, and the cycle of life and death has grown stagnant, two sisters must overcome a decade-long rift to set things to rights. If they don’t murder each other first. Which is hard to do when people can't die, but Kyrie and Petrah are nothing if not stubborn.

In short: it’s a longform, speculative fiction trilogy set in a landscape inspired by the people, flora, and fauna of New Zealand!

In (slightly less) short: its a queer fantasy novel, yo. Every one of these characters is a delightful mess. There is not one “chosen one” among them — it's just a bunch of gays, doing their best (struggling. failing. bickering. falling in love. punching each other in the face). The story hinges on the relationships between characters — familial, platonic, romantic, antagonistic — and through this, and the wider world, I’m writing with the aim that ANYONE can pick up this fantasy land and know that there is a place for them here. We can leave the straight, white, male heroes in the fantasy books of old. (Except for Callum, who I wrote to be a straight, white male hero on purpose to subvert everything that trope is hehe. He's very sweet.)

Here's some characters!

Kyrie: Grumpy, foul-mouthed OG Fuck Up. Probably covered in mud.

Petrah: Done with your shit, wants to read and drink tea.

Meredith: Looks sweet, will kill you. Social schemer.

Callum: Looks like he'll kill you, is very sweet (but can also kill you. He won't, but he can.)

Jin: Annoying people into doing crimes with you is flirting, right?

Zamir: That Classy Bitch, excellent eyebrows (with which to judge you)

Niamh: Possesses all the brain cells the rest collectively lack.

Alistair: Literally can't NOT insult you, really needs a nap. He's trying.

[Image Removed - see note!]

There’s roaming bands of nomads! (Un)Natural disasters! Elven politics! Murder plots! Undead! General fuckery! Found family! Gods who are very bad at their job! Runecrafting! Enemies to begrudging besties! Worldbuilding for days! Diverse characters! Yearning! Trauma! An uncharacteristic lack of exclamation marks!

Here's a (WIP) map! [Image Removed - see note!]

My favourite part is... all of it hehe. But currently, I’m enjoying sinking back into the landscapes of the various regions and the creatures we can find there. Did you know NZ used to have a predatory bird called a Haast Eagle? Which —with a wingspan of 2-3 metres and claws the size of a tiger’s— was the largest eagle in the world, ever?

…Guess what I’m foisting on my characters 😈

It’s so much fun to write a world where (lacking predatory mammals like wolves and bears, etc, like NZ’s landscape is) the dangers lurking in the wild come in the form of dread weta, giant spiders, horned barklizards, Haast eagles, and dragons that look remarkably like Tuatara.

Oh, and there's the three Harpy Dens. Yeah, they’ll fuckin’ kill ya too. If the Deathless don’t catch you first. Good luck!

⚔️🌩️⚔️🌩️⚔️🌩️⚔️🌩️⚔️🌩️⚔️

I’m gonna delete this in a hot second! Two reasons;

1) I’m sharing an image that includes inspiration art for characters that I intend to have my own art commissioned for — none of this art belongs to me, this is just a glimspe into behind the scenes vibes (and I had this screenshot on hand from when a friend asked about my character’s relationships)

2) On the map, any and all names in Te Reo Maori are placeholders, including (and especially) Ao Marama; when the manuscript is complete, I want to work with Tangata Whenua to have their input on choosing appropriate names for my towns and landmarks — I don’t have the whakapapa to speak to this myself, being Ngati Paheka, so it would be pretty tone-deaf of me do write without input from Maori voices. (Fortunately all five of my step-siblings are Maori, so they can be some of my first betas lol, but I’m still gonna reach out to like the Pacifica Students association at my uni and then onward form there to sensitivity readers and such)

Draft is at 120k and counting! If you've read this far, (why are you reading this far? i love you 😭😆) I'll leave you with the current opening line!

It was nearing dinnertime in Westwatch, and Kyrie was seriously contemplating shooting a man in the eye...

[wildesfancyfrock]

was making a playlist for one of my dungeons and dragons characters & i was doing so, i kept finding songs that made me think of zoscar. here are a few of the ones that really get my brain into Animatic Mode (even though i know i will not be producing an animatic, i do not have the energy lol) also most of these r probably sad because i’m feeling sad and gay right now lol, will finish later :/

also ozzie don’t look, this has many spoilers.

- Never Love An Anchor by The Crane Wives:

Something about the lyrics strikes me as 177 to Epilogue 1 Zoscar, especially the five year gap that takes place between 218 and Epilogue 1.

“On some level, I think I always understood

That a ship could never really love an anchor

So, I did the only thing that I could

And severed the rope to set you sailing from my harbour”

wilde, in terms of letting Zolf go because he knew how much Zolf needed it, even if he would want Zolf to stay, it would be selfish.

“I am selfish, I am broken, I am cruel

I am all the things they might have said to you

Do you ever think of me and my two hands, and wonder why?

They never soothed your fevers

And wonder why

They never tied your shoes

And wonder why

They never held you gently

And wonder why

They never had the chance to lose you”

zolf, after resurrecting wilde, the struggle he faces after the war is over and there is no longer a project for him to focus on. he can’t be there for wilde, because, no matter how much he cares about wilde, he’s still a deeply guilt ridden character, who also has to cope with losing his magic, the one thing that kept wilde by his side in 208.

- Two Birds by Regina Spektor:

This one feels very Japan arc for me, where Zolf and Wilde have a bit of a personality swap. Wilde is no longer the outgoing, charismatic character he once was (understandable) and Zolf takes on the role of host, trying to make sure Azu and Hamid are comfortable and Okay once they arrive at the Inn (and after the rockiness of the cell occurrences)

“Two birds on a wire

One says c'mon and the other says "I'm tired"

The sky is overcast and I'm sorry

One more or one less

Nobody's worried”

Zolf urging Wilde to be warm with Azu and Hamid upon their arrival, to which the latter replies “They don’t like it when I’m warm.” The weather is horrid, with a rain that almost never ends, often reflecting the mood.

“I'll believe it all

There's nothing I won't understand

I'll believe it all

I won't let go of your hand”

Even though the mission comes first, they still look out for each other and have developed so deep a connection that Zolf can understand Wilde, whether the latter be nonverbal or not.

- In the Best Case Scenario, We’d Die at the Same Time by My name is Ian:

This one really doesn’t warrant an explanation beyond 217 and “We’ve got this” but still, I’m going to provide one. I think, for them, dying together at the end of the world, facing Guivres, is better than any of Wilde’s previous deaths because then, at least, they’d be together. They end their fight together, as partners, (albeit one visible and one not) and that, if they died at that time, they’d be done and they’d be together. Their mission finished, they could have their holiday, alive or not.

“Love is hard (love is hard)

It comes and goes (it comes and goes)

There are breakups, infidelity, death, and of course divorce

And even if (and even if)

You find a perfect partner

Eventually, one of you will beat the other to the grave

What a shame

So in the best case scenario, we'd die at the same time

Yeah, we'd die at the same time, would we?

Oh, in the best case scenario, we'd die at the same time

Yeah, we'd die at the same time, would we?”

The first set of lyrics hits hard, considering the lifespan of dwarves and humans being vastly different. The probability of Zolf outliving Wilde is much higher than the probability of Wilde outliving Zolf. At least, if they had died facing Guivres, there wouldn’t be the grief of losing your partner and continuing to live on for years after the fact.

- Ease my Mind by Ben Platt:

[ninety-pairs-of-socks]

monday's not so helpful guide to making a band kid (you're not actually reading all of this are you)

alright chumps im goign to band kid rant cause why not and it's goofy cause if you're going to relate an oc or existing character (cough cough a certain group of rhythm kids cough cough) YOU HAVE TO KNOW WHAT BAND KIDS ARE LIKE; at least from my current experience

WOODWINDS/BRASS

okay if your band kid is a brass/woodwind player and not the band kids from preschool, TOY RECORDERS DON'T COUNT

they're either a total prick or a sweetheart (there's no in between, NO EXCEPTIONS depending on which instrument you play)

percussion is better

they act like fucking 2 year olds and scream at each other when you miss one note

actually no they scream at each other for no reason in general

76% of this section claims their gay while in reality >1% are gay

dead inside

make potty humour jokes

"Guys look how hard i can blow my horn!"

insert one kid blowing their horn into another poor kid's ear here

at least one tuba player is a fatso

actually pretty good during concert band

AMONG US

cannot count notes during the first semester

"i need to pee"

sounds of horns dropping

playing jingle bells in october

whine a lot

megalovania

there's only like 8 sweetheart/nice kids in the section total and they are gradually decreasing as they lean into the dark side

attempt to make a fart sound with the horn once

read their notes out loud like wandering zombies on a sunday morning in new jersey in a sewer

i swear there's always one kid that laughs like a fucking chipmunk and everyone pokes fun at it

PERCUSSION

percussionist is another key term to losing all of your sanity for the price of the most dirtiest potty humour you can think of like im not even joking im a percussionist myself and if you think you're going to stay innocent and know nothing during your entire stay in drumline BOY are you wrong

It is critical to hate the brass and woodwinds btw cause they suck and percussion are better end of story (we carry the whole band)

we must make pee pee and fart jokes every 5 seconds or you're gay

if you are in discord during this class everyone will immediately think you have a discord kitten or something idk why

constantly dropping stuff

1 brain cell

at least one person in the band is obese

that one GAY SEX in bold metal letters is funny to them don't ask why

no one is straight

"BBRRRRRAPP, BOOM BOOM BRRRAP BADUM BADOOM BRRAP BAP BOOM BAP BAP BADUM BOOM BAP" - snare drummer

1 e and a 2 e and a 3 e and a 4 e (that's our language)

megalovania on the xylophone

badum-chh

youll never find a sweetheart here. EVER

1-2 quiet kids, usually disappear after a year or two after settling in with the drumline

there's way too much players of one instrument and way too little of another. it's constantly changing but will barely ever be balanced

if you're a foreigner (like me) they'll make stereotype jokes

this concludes this long ass ramble

[demetriandelibinaryboyfriends]

So basically:

Type 1

Hawk, Demetri, and Yasmine are queer because of subtext, symbolism, and the structure of their narrative arcs

Piper is lesbian-coded and has only ever shown interest in women

Demetri fills the narrative role of Hawk’s love interest practically to a T, and it would make the most sense story-wise for them to end up together

Type 2

Aisha is a lesbian. Just trust me bro I can feel it. Girlie does not like men

Yasmine is also just a big fucking mean lesbian. There’s plenty of narrative evidence to support this, but part of it is just me wildin and going off what I feel in my heart

Robby and Tory are both bisexual (quick disclaimer that there probably IS quite a bit of queer-coding with them, but I haven’t done enough of a deep dive analysis of both characters to distinguish between queer coding and vibes)

Moon might identify more with the pansexual label as she gets older and grows into herself a little more

Most of the adult cast (Daniel, Johnny, Amanda, Carmen, Ali, Chozen, and Kumiko) would be happiest in a giant pansexual polycule

Sam is hardcore questioning and probably hasn't found a label that feels right to her yet. Like she definitely likes dudes but I also can't totally rule out the possibility of her liking girls??? (Like. Moon, Tory, and Aisha, anyone?) Idk. I used to be a straight Sam truther but I can't anymore. She has chemistry with too many women.

Type 3

Yasmine is a lesbian EXCEPT for one (1) Kyler Park and Kyler Park only. Girlie exclusively likes women except for this one absolutely trashfire dude with not even half of a brain cell. Men do not do it for her but this one??? This absolute dumb fucker??? Yeah she'll make an exception.

Miguel is straight but also he's gay for Demetri Alexopoulos and Demetri Alexopoulos only. Man exclusively likes women except for the most pasty, pathetic, bad-joke-making loser in the entire school. His types are girlbosses and gangly sarcastic weirdo nerds. He's open to Eli joining the relationship but Demetri has to be there or Miguel can't get off. If he's going to date men, then at least one of them needs to be an awkward pathetic wet cat.

Kyler's sexuality is completely indecipherable but all he knows for sure is that he's only physically capable of simping for anyone (male or female) who finds him annoying and obnoxious

Similarly, lots of guys (including Brucks) are gay for Kyler but he is not gay for them because they enjoy his company too much

Anthony is bisexual and has a big fucking gay crush on Kenny. Kenny is also bisexual and also has a big fucking gay crush on Anthony. The humor here is that they're both doing an absolutely dogshit job of processing it.

"Terry Silver is gay" is a prime example of all 3 btw. Like yeah there's a ton of gay subtext around him and yeah the Energy is absolutely there but also??? Considering the amount of devoted fangirls he has, it would be downright hysterical for him to have 0 sexual or romantic interest in women. 10/10.

There are three kinds of LGBT headcanons:

Actual queer coding / metaphors ("Nimona is trans because her creator made her as a way to express his feelings as a trans person")

Vibes ("Link is genderless because I said so")

It's funny ("Phoenix Wright is asexual because he's the Ace Attorney")

[thrassisfras]

He found a very important piece of the puzzle him and Callum are working on. He also could have waited until morning, but then he wouldn't get to mess with Callum. Claude lives to mess with Callum.

[flip-flop-lover-will-byers]

Ok so now that I've had the chance to sleep on it-

1) Our predictions.....weren't actually wrong. I distinctly remember predictions that Will would try to hide his feelings and matchmake mlvn. That's what he did.

2) The general consensus was that Will's painting would be given as a "friendly" gift, not meant to confess his love. Mike himself, however, would be aware that this was the painting Will was making for "a girl he likes". So Will would have inadvertently revealed his feelings.

Uhhhhh so Will went several steps beyond that and DID present his painting as a romantic gift, from El. The crux remains the same. Mike now has two versions about who the painting is for/from. He's one brain cell away from figuring it out.

Actually Will has kind of fucked himself over pretty badly. There's no doubting the painting's romantic connotations now. Mike needs to mention the painting to El just once and it's game over.

3) People predicted mlvn comeback based on the Stancy comeback coz "it's a cycle" and here we are.

Is it a cycle? Idk. There are some insane parallels between Vol 2 and season 2. Entire dialogues straight from the previous seasons but spoken by different people.

4) even now, after Mike's confession, after sacrificing at the alter of gay heartbreak....mlvn still doesn't work. El is still not talking to Mike. Why?

Is Mike right? It's because she's never failed before? First, shouldn't she be seeking COMFORT from Mike if that's the case? Yanno, if their relationship is so great. Second, she seems able to talk to other people just fine....is it because she feels like she failed Mike specifically? Mike who calls her a superhero at every chance he gets. Great. Relationship.

Is Mike wrong? Is she angry because she knows now that she doesn't deserve to be reduced to a superhero? She knows she's not the monster, but does she know she doesn't have to be the superhero? That's unclear. If she does, then it makes sense she's pissed at Mike because he's apparently incapable of seeing her as anything but a superhero.

If she doesn't.... it's ok she'll get there I think. But then why is she angry now? What other reason could she have? Few possibilities- she knows he's lying, she's annoyed anyway at the superhero thing, she's just grieving, etc

5) no ily from El. Also note- no ily between Lumax (they were gonna go to the movies tho 🥺😭👀) or Jopper. Who DOES say ily this season? Eddie and Dustin. Jonathan and Will. And Mike. It's those season 2 platonic vs romantic parallels all over again.

6). Mike. I....don't understand anything with Mike. So he couldn't say ily to El because he was afraid she wouldn't need him anymore? Didn't Vol 1 demonstrate to him how much she did need him at that time? Did he not feel needed enough when El was sobbing in front of him, the day after a terrible terrible bullying incident, asking him if he loved her?

By all rights, if THAT was his problem, it should have been solved during that fight scene. But it makes sense that it didn't- Mike sees El as the superhero. Does El the teenaged girl need him? Eh. Does El the superhero need him? I gotchu babe here's my ily to give you the strength to fight on. Fulfilling the role yet again. Typical of him.

Not to mention- he's afraid of losing her coz he's just "some nerd" in the same season where he seemingly had accepted and taken pride in being a nerd for the first time (have you considered that we don't want to be popular?). That makes sense.

7) Vickie-Mike parallels for what??? The fact that even now, the Byler subtext continues to fucking exist. That last scene. Wtf.

8) Ironically, Will is the one pushing for mlvn the hardest this season. He's ripping off his bandaid and BEYOND. Wounding himself to get it off.

And yet. Even with a freaking "love confession" their relationship still isn't all that romantic this volume. They reunite, and Will is framed between them (Robin parallel). Immediately followed by an EQUALLY heartfelt reunion between El and Will.

They get to the Surfer Boy Pizza Place, and Argyle interrupts their conversation before it can happen. Mike was gonna say something- the much awaited ily? A mention of the painting? El says she missed him. I only saw the scene once but idk that sounded like a very break up tone to me. I am rooting for you girl. Dump him.

Then the monologue. The "Mike gets kicked into action when someone he loves is in danger" moment. Except apparently the kicking was actually done by Will. Mike's confession, that is drawing from Will's confession, that he thinks is El's confession. What a mess.

9) And what a mess that confession is. I get a strange surreal feeling when I think about these three this volume. As if Will and El are merging into one. Will who expresses his feelings through El. Mike who I'm really fucking confused by. And El who has no idea anything is going on between Mike and Will (or just Will) at all, but seems to be pulling away from Mike for some other reasons.

10) Mike tho.

Where did his feeling "afraid to lose her" coz she "might not need him anymore" come from? El needed him, she adored him. It was clear to see the second they met at the airport. But Mike thought he lost Will. Mike thought Will was painting for a girl (it's not my fault you don't like girls!).

WHERE did Mike's fear of El not needing him come from?

So he's been thinking a lot about how he stumbled across her because of dumb luck. Except that wasn't exactly it. Mike stumbled across her because he was looking for Will.

So Mike's life started the day he met El. The day Will disappeared (I'm the only one acting normal here! Im the only one who cares about Will!). But he remembers the day he met Will on the first day of school. Maybe my memory is just bad but I definitely don't remember a lot of stuff from before I started going to school. Mike's memories of his life most probably literally start around the time he met Will.

She was wearing yellow, and he knew he loved her the moment he met her (You were alone too. It was the best thing I'd ever done). Sorry, I'm of the opinion that S1 mlvn was the best mlvn....and yet. It's the same season where Mike was perfectly ready for El to be taken back to "Penhurst or wherever she came from". It's the same season where their relationship parallels freaking Dustin-Dart from S2. The season where the whole "am i your little pet" thing originates from.

It's just...it's weird. So weird. Is he just saying shit? Does he believe what he's saying? Is it just me, or is he seriously projecting? Idk idk idk.

At this point it's not even about Byler or mlvn for me. I just need things to make SENSE. Some consistency PLEASE.

This can go two ways- either there IS a payoff for all this. Neither mlvn nor Byler feel fully resolved rn, and maybe maybe maybe there is a resolution coming. Maybe there are answers coming.

Or, maybe not. Unfortunately it's not exactly rare for big shows to lose the plot after a while (👀GoT👀) and maybe that's it. That's the answer. Things aren't gonna make sense anymore. Things aren't gonna pay off. Narratives destroyed for the sake of making it more palatable to the larger audience.

We can only hope, and I will (cautiously). If not this, we still got MC!Will coming. If not THAT, I want fanfic writers to start writing villain!Will fics immediately. Also AU slow burns. I love AUs and Byler needs more AU slow burns pls. If canon has forsaken us then forsake canon! I'll give prompts.

[inkdemonapologist]

[BatIM Call of Cthulhu Masterpost]

WE STARTED.... A NEW SCENARIO..... as you may have read in Boo’s summary post, for some unknown reason aLL MUSICAL AND PERFORMANCE ABILITY SEEMS TO BE??? GONE??? Sammy woke up, realised he couldn’t hold even the simplest tune in his head, and immediately lost THIRTY-ONE SANITY in one hit

..... YOU KNOW THAT MAKES SENSE HONESTLY

 anyway i have a some out-of-context quotes from the game for u all under the readmore if ur into that kinda thing!!!

[Sammy is played by me, Joey is played by Boo (inkyvendingmachine), Henry is played by Maf (inkcryptid), Jack is played by Mochi (whatyouwantedmetosee) and Thren (haunted-hijinxer) is our GM!]

[GM] It's a tough voice to do, so you can't be as choosy, and your resident Bendy cannot act to save his life, so that's no good-- [Joey] Uh-oh. [Jack] Sorry, Lurks. [Joey] I'm just so worried he's going to have to act now... [Jack] Clearly, he should've used the time between scenarios to train that! [GM] Yeah, that's just what everybody wants I'm sure, is the Lurker training in LYING. That sounds like a great idea!

[GM] *asking for dice rolls to see how well our actual jobs are going* We can do a little bit of mundanity to, to treasure, and keep you warm later!

[Henry] Should I spend Luck points on this? No, I'm not spending Luck on work. [Sammy] That's a good general life policy

[Jack] Does Jack have any contacts? [Joey] No, he has glasses! :D [Jack] noooo that's my job! It's my job to make Jack's puns! ....Contacts probably didn't exist in the 1930s, that's okay. [Sammy] No, don't say that! Boo's going to have to look it up now!

[GM] What spell is Joey working on? [Jack] (Spell of Make Investor Like You)

[Joey] I think he probably has filing cabinets specifically to put occult stuff in and lock. And then the rest of his office is just piles and tables of animation stuff that you're like "...shouldn't this??? be??? in the filing cabinet???"

[GM] Allison remarks, "The companions of our childhood always possess a certain power of our minds, which hardly any later friend can obtain." [Sammy] Y'know, normal, just nORMAL CASUAL CHATTER, [GM] Tom, working on the pipe, just kinda mutters, "I enjoy friends, dear not only by habit and association, but from their own merits." And she gives him a look! [Jack] ...love at first whATEVER THIS IS,

[Sammy] ...Sammy's not amused. [GM] The band's amused! [Jack] Jack is probably amused.

[GM] So far things are going very well, but y'know, [Jack] Only so long until we crit fail something! [Sammy] NEVER TOO LATE TO MESS IT UP!

[GM] Allison's vibe is like, I Didn't Study This Exactly, But I Was Hoping It Could Just Work Out! [Jack] ...She has a lot of practice at just... making things work out, huh.... 

[GM] Is there anything else Joey would try to show off? [Joey] Tries to think... what else is at the Studio... [Jack] "Do you wanna talk to our janitor? He's really cool!"

[Joey] I roll to see if Joey can put two brain cells together,

[Jack] I have to appreciate that Bendy said he didn’t have the keys today. He’s been stealing them before, but THIS TIME isn’t his doing!

[Sammy] If there’s anything he needs to do himself, then he’ll come in early, but I don’t know what state we’re in -- [Joey] Uh, New York. [Sammy] ...what? [Joey] You didn’t know what state we’re in. :) [Sammy] [Sammy] thanks

[Joey] Oh Joey’s absolutely coming in early. Joey woke up, and felt great, so he’s going to menace every other department today, because he has the energy to get his fingers into everything! [Sammy] *distressed sounds in the background*

[Sammy] Hey how come when we did a Halloween cartoon, we all went to Haiti, but we’re doing a cartoon about a fair and we’re not going to a fair? [Jack] [Jack] I think we all know why.

*trying to decide who goes to Joey’s fancy dinner with an investor* [Sammy] I don’t know if Sammy will help you... [Sammy] Unless you bring Sammy and put him on a piano, like a small child that needs to be immediately handed crayons.

[Joey] Joey will say that they’re essentially the second hands in each of the departments-- [Jack] Yeah, Abby, the second hand… entire Art Department director, [GM] Uh-huh. [Joey] She… she knows,, [GM] Joey, [Joey] She knows that Joey… is … Big Gay for Henry,,, [GM] This is true, but I think she likes nominal acknowledgement that she holds a position, [Jack] He can just say that they’re high-ranking, and not-- [Joey] No I rolled badly, Joey’s going to say that Sammy and Henry are busy, so he brought his second-best! :) [GM] Abby is massaging her temples. [Joey] Sorry, Abby. He is,, an idiot,,, [GM] I think she’d be a lot more bothered if she couldn’t go and commiserate with Henry about it. Like, “why can’t he keep it straight?” [GM] ……………….well. She knows why he can’t keep it straight.

[GM] It’s about midnight, and something... strange.... happens. The trumpet player, who is leading the band -- [Joey] -- has a trumpet for a head! [GM] what no

*Joey succeeds a sanity check, Jack fails it* [GM] Joey, roll 1d10! [Joey] Uh, 3? [GM] Okay, you’re only down three sanity, that’s not so bad! [GM] Jack, roll 6d10! [Jack] what? [Joey] Six??? SIX d10s????? [GM] Yeah! [Joey] nICE KNOWING YOU, JACK!!! It’s time for Sillytime Jack.

[Jack] Smash cut to Henry, curled up in bed, nice and cozy,

[GM] I will also note, you cannot seem to Fast Talk. [Joey] ...what else can I do? [GM] Just normal talk. Like a normal person.

[Jack] I feel like Jack probably has a hunch that it’s weird nightmarish horror nonsense, on account of he just lost nineteen sanity,

[GM] Abby’s gonna try to take him to the hospital. [Jack] Jack’s just going to let that happen, because he’s shaken enough that he doesn’t have any significantly better ideas! Other than AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA,

[Sammy] *rolling sanity damage* 9… 9, stop that…. 4, [Jack] You’ve already lost more than Jack! [Sammy] 2, ...6, and 1! [Joey] That’s 31. [GM] Okay, Sammy has six sanity! [Sammy] eXCUSE ME?????

[Joey] Joey does want to head home… what day is it? [GM] Friday, the 13th! [Jack] HM, [Sammy] I GUESS IT IS, ISN’T IT… I wasn’t keeping track, but I guess it sure is! [GM] A delightful treat for myself, when I was looking up days in July, in 1934, [Sammy] WAIT, NO, ITS ACTUALLY A COINCIDENCE? Oh my gosh, [Jack] Because Friday the 13th wouldn’t even be a spooky day at this point in time! [GM] It is now! [Jack] It’s spooky, but just for us!

[Sammy] Sammy would try to call Jack, he’d try to call Joey, he’d try to call Henry -- probably several times, [Henry] sammy gets jack’s cat [Henry] phone is answered with meows [Jack] That does seem fitting for a really bad luck roll; the phone gets answered, and Sammy’s really relieved -- and it’s just the cat. [Sammy] Sammy, at 6 sanity: “jack’s tuRNED INTO A CAT,”

[Joey] The phone kept on ringing, so the cat just batted it off the cradle, [Jack] I feel like Jack probably doesn’t usually get a significant number of calls, so like, this many calls in a row is just obnoxious! [Jack] Cat’s having none of it. [Jack] Phone ring isn’t breakfast! [Jack] Where is the soft provider of food.

[GM] Oh no, you know what’s going to happen? Henry’s gonna get through to Jack, and then when Sammy calls it’s busy! [Sammy] cALLS JACK IT’S BUSY, CALLS HENRY IT’S BUSY, [Jack] I was gonna say maybe Henry would call Sammy first, because Sammy was one of the original three. [Jack] …Henry calls Sammy, Sammy is busy because SAMMY is trying to call someone, and then Henry calls Jack, and Sammy tries to call Jack again-- [Sammy] *laughing* THE HORROR, The deep, bone-chilling horror of A TIME BEFORE CALL-WAITING!!

[Henry] Is Joey there? [Jack] Yeah. [Henry] Are you guys alright? [Jack] ……………….hm,

[Jack] Cat is just sat on Joey, purring. Something is wrong with the human. Purr to fix the human.

[Henry] I called Sammy to make sure he’s okay, but-- [Abby] Was he? [Henry] No.

[Joey] Joey is going to be… obstinate feels like the wrong word? [Joey] He’s being the cat where you put the leash on, and the cat just sits down. [Joey] That is the Joseph mood right now.

[Sammy] *muttering* First one boyfriend turns into a cat, now the other boyfriend’s voice is wrong, today is terrible,

[Joey] This is Joey’s everything. [Sammy] That’s Joey’s contribution to the party! That’s like, your bard can no longer play music. [Sammy] ……….which is also true, but Sammy contributes other things. [Jack] Like Intimidate! [Sammy] Right now he contributes paranoia!

[soupforsoup]

Station 19 is just a group of highly skilled and intelligent people with only one (1) actual brain cell between them, and god I am so gay for every one of them

[wolf-queer-discourse]

Adventures in Aphobia #3

My last two Adventures in Aphobia both took on similar flavors of eye-rolling at shameless, obvious bigotry to anyone willing to look or care. But today, I found a different type of aphobia, and I’m actually eager to talk about this one. Have a read of this first.

Look, the bar of respect for ace people is so low it’s all the way in hell, but I mean, to many people, especially allosexual people, they may look at this post and think, “No, this isn’t aphobia. The poster wasn’t blatantly cruel.” But what some fail to realize is that politeness can be the thinnest of veils over the ugliest of takes. Polite bigotry gaslights the victims into thinking they can’t be upset about this.

So what’s the deal with this post?

PARAGRAPH #1 starts off innocently enough, saying ace discourse wouldn’t exist if people recognized complex relationships to sex and relationships. Even taken on its own, I do not agree with this. Ace discourse ranges all the way from outright denial of asexual existence to the strong hatred for and exclusion of aces from the queer community. Nearly everyone recognizes people have complex relationships to sex...that...that doesn’t mean ace people won’t be discriminated against. In fact, it’s an argument aphobes use constantly to try and gaslight ace people into erasing themselves. Ace discourse comes from a lot of places, but at the end of the day, it all stems from people’s refusal to acknowledge ace people and their unique experiences. This poster absolutely does not get to say “IT’s CoMpLicAteD”, and expect ace people to just disappear. Honestly, it’d be better and more honest if they said “Lol, ace people should go fuck themselves and hop to the back of the line with everyone else.”

PARAGRAPH #2 and #3 are not very objectionable on their own. Everything said is true. Society has very complicated views on sex, and life happens to all people. The ugly part of this is that the poster is setting up an argument here in which they will hand wave ace people into the “everyone else” crowd and pretend as if we’re all just too similar and no labels should even exist.

This is literally what enby-phobes do. They say “Well, gender is COMPLICATED”, which is true, but then they say “So like...aren’t we all really nonbinary when we think about it? Why should enby people label themselves?” I swear we’ve all seen this. The poster is agender. This argument could easily be whipped in their face. Different forms of bigotry can share very clear overlaps, and it’s very important to acknowledge where these arguments come from and why they exist. It exists as a way to shut people up. It happens to bi people too! Every day, people come out as bi and someone tells them “pff, everyone thinks girls are hot. I had a crush on my best friend once, that doesn’t mean I’m not straight! All people are like this!” Let’s call out this erasure where we see it. It’s not the same thing, and if anyone saying stuff like this truly believes what they’re saying, maybe they’re the ones who need to reevaluate their own identity.

PARAGRAPH #4 dips its ugly toes straight into blatant aphobia, having the gall to call ace and aro people “obsessed” with pretending their relationships with sex and romance are wholly unique and different. Nah, fuck right off with that bullshit. The poster even goes on to say ace people have created entire new social classes. Uh...WHAT? Is there some secret ace society with a caste system living in the shadows?? What is this person talking about?? I suppose you can’t be a true bigot unless you have some vague grievance to weakly hand-gesture at that you couldn’t prove given 20 years to do so. For the love of my sanity, just say you hate ace people! It’s okay! (I mean, not actually, but Jesus Christ does it save us all some time). They also say things like “somehow excluded from”. Replace asexual people with nonbinary people and take a joyride through this section, because the arguments are scarily similar. What would it take for this poster to acknowledge ace and aro people have their own experiences? Seriously, what? What holds you back from doing this?

It’s also funny to note the actual lack of substance to this argument. The poster is not giving any specific examples or even bringing up what being ace and aro mean. Yes, there is a pretty noticeable difference between feeling sexual attraction and not feeling sexual attraction. How many “allo” people do you know that say they’ve NEVER experienced this? Come on. The poster reduces asexuality and aromanticism down to allo people’s, in their own words, hyper-specific contexts where they don’t want sex or love. At least the poster admits any circumstance that allo people are comparable to ace people are extremely specific. But for real, are we hinging a whole argument on a few very specific examples of allo people having some similarity to ace people?

“Nothing about your relationship to sex or love makes you more or less LGBT. If you are gay and don’t want to have sex, ever, you are still gay. “

Mini strawman alert for the idea any ace person thinks you’re less gay if you’re also ace. And bonus points for an aphobe who refuses to use the definition of asexuality: not experiencing sexual attraction, and instead goes for “don’t want to have sex”. For the last. Fucking. Time. Not wanting to have sex and being asexual are NOT the same. Don’t make me pour gasoline in my eyes every time I see this.

After this, the poster goes on a tangent, which by the tone, seems to think it's very inspiring, and says no matter how you want to have sex (including only certain days of the week), you’re still straight! It’s so fucking condescending and gross to talk ace people out of their own identity like this.

“EVERY person who is heterosexual is different in how they perform or experience.”

Oh. My. GOD. THEY DIDN’T EVEN SAY STRAIGHT. THEY SAID HETEROSEXUAL. WUGGYUEGYUG. God help me. Can one be both bisexual and heterosexual? No…? Okay. So then. How is one both asexual AND heterosexual? What single brain cell in this poster’s head was responsible for this Chad of a sentence? I—

*deep breath* 

So. It’s interesting how the poster says “perform or experience it”. Asexuality is an identity. It is not a performance, and it is not defined by your actions. A straight person not having sex does not become asexual. And sure...people with the same label can experience their sexuality differently, but...to a point, guys. You can’t experience your sexuality out of the DEFINITION of the label. Heterosexual: Sexual attraction to the opposite gender. Asexual: Sexual attraction to no one. If a “heterosexual” isn’t sexually attracted to anyone, they are by definition, not heterosexual. It takes insane mental gymnastics to make this argument, so A for flexibility, I guess? 

“Gayness, straightness, and bisexuality are not defined by HOW you do or don’t want sex or HOW you do or don’t want to date, it’s just defined by WHO you want to be with.”

The first part of the sentence is correct, but it also defeats this person’s entire argument. Ace people AGREE with this. Being asexual is not the act of not having sex!! It’s not experiencing sexual attraction! You can google this! The second part of the sentence is mostly correct, depending on your interpretation. The issue is in part with the words the poster used: gayness, straightness and bisexuality. These words are not all equivalents. Gay could refer to sexual and or romantic orientation. Thus an ace gay person. Straightness is not actually an equal word to gayness. This is because straight is an exclusive term for a normative sexuality (in society’s eyes) in terms of sexual and romantic attraction. Some ace people DO call themselves straight, though it’s inaccurate. Ace people can be heteroromantic, but because being straight is so exclusive, you need to be both sexually AND romantically attracted to only the opposite gender.

The post basically ends telling ace people they’re all actually straight and were just confused the whole time. Lovely. And an erasure of gay aces too! Believe it or not, gay ace people do not like having their ace identities erased. Who’d have guessed?

Honestly, if anything this post is just kind of sad. A sad reflection of what people believe and how they truly do not see their own bigotry. They believe they’re freeing ace people from an incorrect label. They’re the heroes.

They’ll say “it’s okay, you’re not asexual” as if they've like...lifted a burden off of ace people. Like, “Oh, you think I’m not asexual? Cool, cool. Glad you cleared that up for me!” It’s sad how aphobes think, some very genuinely, that asexuality is just some high school party that went off the rails, and we’re all just coming out of the drunken haze, ready to go home. Ready to all laugh about it later, tease one another about how wild and silly it all was. 

Having your identity erased like this is fucking horrible, and I hope people like this can take a look in the mirror and see themselves clearly. All ace and aro people have a right to their identity, whether gay, bi, heteroromantic or anything else. End of story.

[buffaluff]

Okay so what is 911? I've seen you reblogging stuff for the past days (weeks? I'm bad at time) and now I'm curious.

Hahaha, 9-1-1 is my current brainworm…it’s one of many predictable procedural first responder shows on cable TV that has recently taken over my life. Or at least my TV-watching time. It follows 911 dispatchers, cops, and mainly firefighters at a firehouse in Los Angeles. I wouldn’t call it a GREAT show but it does press all of my buttons lol—found family, fantastic character growth, excessive angst, amazing soundtrack choices, ridiculous rescue scenarios, etc. The characters in the show absolutely make it worthwhile, I’m very invested in all of them lmao. There is also a spin-off we’re working our way through, that takes place in Austin, TX.

On twitter it’s referred to it as the #GayFirefighterShow. There is a lot of rep on the show, but many fans are really gunning for the chemistry between two specific firefighters who are so far not explicitly written as queer but context certainly indicates something deeper. Best friends, co-parenting an adorable kid, share one brain cell/himbos who make each other dumber, etc. I just am enamored by these dummies.

So yes, while I am watching a lot of the gay firefighter shows lately, I’m not certain I can recommend anyone else be subjected to 5+ seasons of this absolutely ridiculous show 😂 although my track record of introducing it to people (okay so my family and 2 friends) and having them get hooked it is 4 for 4 so far?