#...i still have that confession up in another tab maybe one of these days i'll finish it

[penwieldingdreamer]

Love Confessions and other truths

Whoa, this one got out of hand I guess.

Thank you everyone for the likes, comments and reblogs. This fandom has given me so much joy and inspiration and he's definitely hard to resist not to write for.

As you know, I tried to keep the appearance and description of the reader as vauge as possible, you guys will be able to come up with your own picture for the reader, only thing I pictured: female reader, living in London with her british mother and american father, single mother of two girls Lottie (5) and Millie (3), and two years older than Austin.

Summary: Austin confesses his feelings for you, but you keep the truths about your feelings under wraps, until friends come up with good intentions and meddle in your relationship.

Words: 5.6k

Warnings: fluff, some swear words, maybe a few tippos - if so, please let me know

Happy reading and enjoy. And please let me know what you think, if you want to be tagged or taken off the taglist for this.

Dividers @cafekitsune

Tagging: @sqrlgrl22 @buckysteveloki-me @rlinda6 @imusicaddict @fortheloveoffanfic @unicoreads

Dec. 2022

With a groan you pulled yourself up on the couch, your leg propped up on a mass of pillows. 

“You doing okay, baby?” 

Were you okay? You didn't really know. A few days ago you injured yourself walking home from the store down the road from your flat. Winter had taken hold of the city and the streets were very slippery. Of course you thought your running shoes were enough to last that short walk. 

Well, your bandaged knee and ankle spoke for themselves. The ice patch had you out of commission for the time being, thankfully you only twisted your ankle and partially tore your ACL. It was dumb and unnecessary, but a few weeks and you'd be good as new. 

“Hurts like hell, but it's better than yesterday.”

Your mother leaned over and laid a kiss on your hair. She had been helping you with the girls, keeping them occupied and stopped them from running up the wall. “It's only a few more days. Doctor Burnes said you'll be able to walk better by next week, just keep it elevated for now and take your pain meds.”

“Hm, yeah, by next year I'll be a normally functioning human again.” It was a joke but also a semblance of truth. 

Only a few more days and you'd ring in 2023. Hopefully a better one than the last. With Trevor finally paying on time, Lottie still having fun at school and Millie enjoying her time at Kindergarten.

“How's Austin? I haven't heard from him in a while.” She asked, busying herself in the kitchen.

Last you heard he had told you that he was busy with pre awards parties and dinners and planned to go on a trip with Kaia during the holidays. “Don't know, you probably should ask the girls, they've been keeping tabs on him. I just provide the source to let them talk with him.”

Chuckling, your mother shook her head. “They really love him, huh? He's great with the girls.”

“They do. If he's not calling every third day, Lottie takes my phone and calls him herself.”

Your mother had listened to the excited squeals of your daughters when they had their evening calls with the actor. Once she had asked you about your feelings towards him, treading dangerously but you shut her down really quick. He was in a relationship, younger than you and you definitely didn't want to jump into another relationship, even if your last had been years ago.

Was this really what you wanted? 

Every time you talked to Austin, you felt your insides flutter like millions of butterflies. 

No, he's happy with Kaia, with his career. He doesn't need you to distract from all this.

“Mummy, mummy, mummy! Look it's Austin!” Lottie ran towards you, jumping onto the couch and hitting a painful spot on your knee. Her eyes widened as she heard your gasp and shrank back from you. “Careful baby, your mum isn't in the best shape right now.” Your mother reprimanded gently and you saw your daughter’s lips tremble slightly, the phone in her hand to show Austin watching attentively over the FaceTime app.

 “I'm sorry mummy, I didn't mean to hurt you.”

You pulled her back against your side, sitting up on the couch so you were propped upright again instead of laying down. Kissing her hair and breathing in her scent, that still reminded you of the time she was a baby, you brushed your hand along her back. “I'll be okay, baby, now what's this about Austin calling?”

“Hey darlin’, you doin’ okay all the way over there on that island?” 

You knew he was trying to keep in all the questions he had when he heard your mother and Lottie talk, but even as good as an actor he was, he couldn't keep the concern shining in his ocean blue eyes.

“I'll be fine, Aus, nothing a few days rest and a hearty meal won't fix.”

Squinting, he shook his dark blonde locks, giving you a disapproving look. “Lottie said you fell, hurt your knee and ankle.”

“Don't worry about it. My mum is helping out for the time being, keeping the girls entertained and me off my feet.” You sent him a reassuring smile, playing with Lottie's locks. “How are you? Are you taking care of yourself?”

“Hmm, yeah. It's warm, the sun’s shining and I'm relaxing at the beach.”

Your daughter giggled at his playful retort, her body jumping so hard, you had to hold onto her so she wouldn't fall off the couch and hit her head. “Austin! You're so funny. He's so funny mummy, right!”

Humming, you nodded your head, but you saw dark shadows under his eyes, not from lack of sleep but from his anxiety and his brain turning in a million directions as he once told you. “Why don't you help granny while I talk to Austin for a minute. You can come back and show him what decorations Millie and you made for Christmas. How's that sound sweetheart?”

With a deep sigh she nodded her head and skipped into the kitchen, telling your mother that you sent her away to have a grown up talk with Austin.

“She's getting quite sassy for her age.” The actor commented, sitting back on the lounge chair in the cabana, the blue shirt he wore pulled down at the neck to reveal a sliver of his chest making you swallow against the dryness of your throat.

“She is. Seems to be your influence because she never acted like that before she met you.” You accused with a smile before turning serious again. “Now what's this about? Shouldn't you be enjoying your mini getaway with your lovely girlfriend before the award marathon?”

Nodding his head, he put his arm behind his head, leaning his phone against his propped up leg. His free hand scratched along his chin and you knew with whatever in his mind right now, Austin wasn't enjoying his time with Kaia. 

“I've got a lot on my mind, I guess.”

“Want to talk about it? You know, I've got time before dinner.”

A mixture between a groan and a sigh left his lips as he stared into your eyes, making your insides twist with something you hadn't felt in so long, something warm and soothing. “I think I'm stuck in a kind of predicament.”

“Okay, something with your next project? Or the upcoming awards?”

“No,” Austin shook his head. “It's you.”

Wide eyes stared at him as you tried to comprehend what the actor just told you. “M-me? I mean, why?”

“I've been thinking about you and I can't stop it. I should be happy with Kaia, but all I'm thinking about is if I'd have a chance with you, if you'd be my girl and I'd get to call the girls and you my family.”

You shook your head in denial. His confession was making your head spin. You were friends, nothing more. “Austin, you, you've got Kaia, it's not fair to her. I, this can't happen, I'm sorry.”

His hand tightened in his sandy blond locks, trying desperately to keep his composure and you knew his anxiety was ready to make itself known. “I know. I tried so fucking hard. But God forbid, I want you… so much.”

“This…Austin, it’s…I can’t, I’m really sorry. I can only be your friend,” You felt the burn behind your eyes, the tears building up and threatening to make you blind. Yet you refused to let them fall. The crestfallen look on his face made your heart ache but you knew there was no way a relationship would work at the moment. “You need to focus on your career on all those amazing projects you’ll be able to make and we can’t distract you.”

Shaking his head, Austin sat up again, his phone now close to his face and you saw the tears building in his own eyes. He was an amazing actor and yet he could be read so easily. “I can focus on my career with you. I want you, I want the girls, I want everything!”

With each word his voice got louder, until he nearly screamed it for everyone to hear. You could make out a shadowy figure at his side and swallowed thickly. Probably not the best topic to talk about when his girlfriend was just a few feet away and they should be happily engaged in other activities during their couples time.

“I can be friend, Austin, nothing more. You want to talk to the girls? They made Christmas decorations with Elvis on their stars.” He nodded his head, brushing his long fingers under his eyes and you could feel the dredd pool deep in your stomach. Keeping the sniffles to yourself until you were safely tucked away in the bathroom, you called Lottie and Millie and with some grunting and heaving, you managed to get off the couch.

Your mother's eyes followed you before you pushed out your daughters’ excited squeals and Austin’s playful responses. 

Your heart ached and you felt your stomach clench, thinking back on his words. 

What had you gotten yourself into?

He was an amazing guy but you feared you weren't the right one for him. 

Putting your hand over your mouth, you tried to muffle your sniffles, the tears wetting your cheeks on the way down as you felt your heart shattering.

“So, she said No?”

Before he called you, Austin had finally sat down with Kaia and discussed what had been plaguing him the last few months.

He knew it wasn't fair to be with her and think about the what ifs of you being there.

Of course she wasn't happy, their relationship lasting not even a year, but the model had already seen a change in him. She was sad and cried when they talked but knew neither of them would be happy if they continued like they did.

So they agreed to end it there on their mini getaway, agreeing to be better off as friends, still supporting the other on their dreams.

Kaia sat on the end of the lounge right at his feet. She leaned on his knee, watching Austin closely. He always wears his heart on his sleeve and she could see the defeated look all over his face.

“I'm sorry.” Pushing the heels of his hands against his eyes, he tried to keep.the tears at bay, being the sensitive man he was. “She told him she could be my friend, but nothing more.”

“She's lying.” She finally mused, thinking back on what she heard you say during the call. “She was ready to break down and admit it, Aus.”

Pursing his lips the actor watched his girlfriend, well ex closely. “But she said”

“It's not what she said, it's what she didn't say. The way she behaved.” Kaia sent him a smile. “She's just as in love with you as you are with her. No woman in her right mind wouldn't be in love with you. I mean look at me, we had a great time together.”

Awkwardly scratching his fingers along his chin, the actor breathed out a sigh. He was loath to admit that it had been an amazing time with her but life was throwing him curve balls left and right it seemed. “I'm thankful for our time together and I'm sorry for the way this played out, but I”

“We're staying friends, Aus, I'm not letting you off that easily. I'll be helping you get your girl, besides maybe that way mom will be distracted the next time I FaceTime her and the girls to ask me when I'll be deciding to grace the world with little Crawford models.”

“Oh god.” He chuckled, throwing his head back with a laugh. “Please don't. Enjoy what you're doing right now. You'll know when you find the right guy.”

Kaia hummed, drawing an invisible pattern on his propped up knee. “I thought that was you, but you know the last few months we've both been so focused on our career and things we both clearly have different thoughts about, that it hasn't felt like in the beginning. And I guess ending this while we can is the best decision for us.”

“I'll have to talk to Kate, make sure there's no dumb rumors circling and we get a joint statement out there to keep it as low as possible.” His free hand gently brushed along her shoulder, before settling on her back and drawing Kaia into a tight hug. “You don't know how much this means to me. The last time, with Nessa, being friendly wouldn't have been possible.”

The model reached her hand up, brushing a stray tear away that had slowly made its way down his cheek. “Have you been able to talk to her at all? Clear it up after all that time?”

He shook his head. “Honestly, I don't know what I would tell her, she didn't want to listen the first time and I guess she's happy now. Why wake sleeping dogs when you can keep the peace?”

“Well, that is a good reason…for now.” She shrugged her shoulders. “Let's focus on your darlin’ and how to get her to admit she is head over heels for you.” Winking, Kaia got up and moved inside the villa they had rented for the week, determined to get her mission, to shove you into his arms, started.

If there was one woman she was going to step aside for it was you. She had known you had feelings for Austin for a while but you never acted on them and she had to give it to you: for her you were more sister and close friend than some of her friends in LA.

Feb. 2023

“Hey, Ash. How's everyone? How's my favorite niece?”

The corners of his mouth raised up at the light chuckles coming from his phone. Austin was back in London for another night of awards. He still couldn't believe he had won all those awards like the People's Choice or Golden Globe and gotten nominations for Elvis alone. Hell, he was nominated for the BAFTA and the Oscar. This was beyond anything he ever thought and yet, looking out over Hyde Park he felt his gut churning. He wished he could talk to his mom, to Lisa-Marie who had given him so much strength before he lost her suddenly a few weeks ago. She had the same calming energy as his mom and after getting to know her he was drawn to her, happy for every moment he shared with Elvis’ only child. 

You still hadn't stopped seeing him as just a friend, calling him and congratulating on his win, listening to him when he got the news of Lisa's passing. He didn't think it possible but he fell even more and Austin wasn't sure he'd be able to recover easily.

“She's your only niece for now but Juju is doing great, really everyone is.” Ashley told him with a grin. “How're you Mr. Golden Globe winner? Heard your in the run for a BAFTA and Oscar.”

“It's unbelievable, I…phew, still can't believe it. I called Nessa, I wanted to talk to her and…thank her, you know, for what she did back then. Didn't want her to just read it in the press. I-I wished mom could be here. And Lisa.” 

His eyes watered. Austin had so many moments he was taking on alone again. Kaia was back in LA filming while juggling the runway as well but she loved it and every time they talked he could hear the lightness in her voice. 

“I'm sorry Aus, you know they're hella proud of you. Your mom is always there, Juju was in the garden a few days ago and this huge butterfly just plopped down on her nose and I knew Lori was there looking after her. And I bet Lisa will shine down on you as well. You made something really special.” She pulled him out of his dark thoughts, the small smile returning to his plumb lips. “And I'm sorry about Kaia, I know you guys were super happy. But you're still friends right? Are you going to be okay, want to talk about it?”

“Hm, yeah, I think so. Right now I wished I wasn't going alone tonight.” 

Humming, the actress sent him a smile. “You're not alone, babe. Baz is there and Kate, she'll make sure everything goes smoothly.”

Running his hand through his hair, Austin sat down on the plush settee in front of the bed. “I know, it's not them, it's…I'm grateful for them but there's, I wished she was there with me.”

“Oh!” Ashley's eyes widened with a grin spreading on her lips. “You still haven't gotten further with her?”

“No,” he sighed. “I even sent her love songs, ones I sang myself, tried to talk to her again when I called the girls, but she's insistent.”

“Don't worry, she'll come around.” The actress winked and Austin racked his brain about what she was going on about. He hoped she wasn't doing something he might regret in the end.

“Good morning my little poppets, I come bearing breakfast.” Your father called in his fake british accent from the front door of your flat. Your daughters squeals erupted with shouts of grandpa and you watched them run around, laughing softly at their antics. Your mother helped you in the kitchen, preparing the cake for Millies's birthday the next day.

“She's so excited for tomorrow.” Your mother laughed, mixing the cake batter and winking at you.

“That she is. She can't wait to be four, kept asking me when it was time for bed so her birthday would come sooner.” Chuckling, the two of you glanced back at the doorway waiting for your rugrats and your father.

“Mommy! Look what grandpa brought me!” Lottie called running over to you, holding up an Elvis coloring book. Your father followed closely with your youngest propped up on his hip. Somehow you had a feeling her obsession with the King of Rock'n'Roll was only fueled by Austin and your father. 

“Found it in that web shop and she wouldn't shut up about this Austin being Elvis in that new movie, so I thought I'd do ya a favor. That way she'll keep quiet for some time as well.” He ruffled her hair and grinned down at his oldest granddaughter.

Shaking your head, you were just about to retort when your phone chimed with a new message. You guessed it was Austin, telling you he had arrived safely at his hotel and was preparing to surprise Millie tomorrow with a visit.

Meet me at the Four Seasons. It's important. K

Kaia? Why was she…You hoped Austin was okay. You hoped she was okay. Of course you had read the news on their break-up, feeling guilty about it all and you knew Austin’s decision on that but you wanted to talk to her, explaining that you never intended, never encouraged him to start feeling anything for you. 

Swallowing the lump that had formed in your throat, you casually replied and asked her when she wanted to meet you. The reply was immediate and you felt that gut wrenching anxiety.

Was she going to blame you for the break-up? Oh god, this wasn’t going to end well.

Get here as soon as you can. K

And you did. You had asked your parents to watch the girls, not knowing how long the talk with Austin’s ex would take and what she really wanted. Anything was possible. Kaia had always been super nice to you and the girls, but there was no way of knowing if her thoughts about you had changed now after the end of their relationship.

So, you made your way inside the hotel, hands clammy and knees chittery from the dark thoughts swirling inside your head. The front desk loomed over you and you raked your brain on how to approach this, they probably wouldn’t just let anybody know information on

“Hey, Y/N.”  

Turning around with a soft gasp, you saw Kaia sitting together with two women watching expectantly. Taking a deep breath you clutched your bag tightly, a lifeline if you will and suddenly you felt stupid for being overly dramatic but you couldn’t help it. “H-Hey, Kaia. I’m sorry, I came as fast as I could and well, honestly I don’t know why I’m here, but I’m really sorry and I never meant”

She giggled softly, stopping your rambling and put her arm around your shoulder to pull you over, sitting with her and the women. “God, you’re such a sweetheart. I’m not mad. I was bummed, sure, but I guess we wanted different things in life so it’s all good.”

“But you, you said it was important and I thought you were going to hate me and I’m rambling again, sorry, I’m just nervous.”

Chuckling, one of the women got up and offered her hand. “I’m Sandra and this lovely lady is Sofia. Kaia asked us to get you ready for your date with Austin.”

Wide eyes turned to the model, your hand tightly gripping the offered appendage. “M-My date? I don’t…I think you’re mistaken. There was never any word about a date, besides we’re not even a couple.”

“Yet and yes, you’ll be going on an awards date. Aus has been moping the last two and a half months and to be honest, I want cheery, cheeky Austin back as my friend. So, we’re going to doll you up and I definitely know you’re going to blow him away.” She smirked at you, grabbing your arm and pulling you along to the elevators. 

“But” Your protests were cut short as the doors closed and the four of you made your way to Kaia’s hotel room. With it still being morning, Sandra told you there was enough time to get ready without any kind of stressing out - at least time wise, inside your brain was another story. You kind of felt like the girl from that Disney movie Inside Out. So many feelings at once.

“Right, so Austin is still up in his room, Tom and Jamie are going to join him later, we’ll be down here and get you ready. If you want you can take a shower first, relax a little and calm down.” The model suggested grabbing the champagne bottle from the large table inside her room - well more like a suite, if you were asked.

“I-I need to call my mum, she’s taking care of the girls right now. I thought I’d not be longer than an hour if you let me live.” You shrugged, anxiously biting off the skin on your finger.

Sofia grabbed your hand and pulled it away from your mouth. “Stop that, you don’t have anything to worry about.”

“So you say. You guys are gorgeous looking with killer bodies. Those dresses belong on you, not little ol’ me.” Your shoulders slumped. “The last time I remotely dressed up was for a date a year ago and the only positive thing he said to me was that my eyes were looking a bit tired and I should make sure to get enough sleep. I haven’t seen the inside of a gym for over three and a half years when I tried to train off all that baby weight and then just gave up. My ass is too big, my boobs are saggy and”

“And you have two wonderful kids that you love to bits. You look gorgeous with the right tool, believe me. Me looking like that is the combination of good genes and hard work.” Kaia pointed to herself. “There’s days I’m super happy to just sit down, doing nothing and enjoying the greasiest food I can get. But then I remember I have to get back to the Fashion shows.”

Taking a deep breath you nodded your head. “I still need to call my parents.”

“I’ll do that, you take a shower and drink that glass of champagne, believe me, it works wonders.” Kaia suggested, pushing you towards the en-suite and taking your bag. “Now, chop chop, we haven’t got all day.”

After your shower, Jamie, Austin’s hairstylist sat you down in front of the large vanity, all tools and makeup stashed on the table. You couldn't remember if you ever dreamed of something like this - your wedding maybe, but on a day like today, definitely not.

“What do you think about this one?” Sandra held up a gorgeous tulle dress, long sleeved and rhinestones all over. It was perfect, just not for you.

Shaking your head, you forgot Jamie was still fighting with your hair. She had been adamant that the last time a female sat in her chair had been back when she was training. The pull on your temples as she combed it was enough of a reprimand to sit still.

“It's the fourth dress you said no to. What is wrong with this one?” The stylist sighed and turned to Kaia who was shrugging her shoulders, obviously giving up on reasoning right now. “The first”

“My boobs are to big for that one.”

“Why do you think I've got Boob-Tape? The next was too low cut, the slit on the other one too high.”

“I just, I don't think this is me. Can't it be just a simple black dress, no fancy feathers, stones or whatever. For all I care, run down to Primark and get me a slip dress and I'd be fine with that.”

Sofia gave you a stern look, brandishing her powder brush as if it was a weapon to hit some sense into you. “Absolutely not. You're going to be the dame of the ball, you hear me. Everybody will be so jealous Austin is having you in his arms.”

Taking a deep breath you reminded yourself that the four women wouldn't let you say anything else. So you sat and let them flit about and do their thing.

“Okay, I've got one more dress, if you don't wear that, you'll have to walk about in your underwear.” Sandra smirked at you, holding up a black evening gown. “I think this one will be what you want. It’s Saint Laurent and paired with those gorgeous black Jimmy Choo heels you’ll look amazing.”

Your fingers brushed along the dress, feeling the cool silk underneath, that’s when you saw the back. The fabric was bound together in the back but if you wore that, you’d not be able to wear a bra. “My boobs are going to fall out of this one.” You moaned looking at the stylist and the model.

“Nope, that’s where the boob-tape comes in. Now let Jamie and Sofia swing their magic wands and get you in this dress ASAP.” Sandra commented, winking at you.

Kaia chuckled next to her, taking a sip of the coffee room service had brought half an hour ago. “You know, that sounded a bit dirty right there, Sandy.”

An hour later you found yourself at the back entrance, hair and makeup on point, pictures taken for your parents and hands clutching the bag like a rope. Kaia smiled at you, her arm linked with your own. “You, you're going to come with me, right?”

“I'll be at the show, but I'm taking a different car.”

Panic seized you, gripping her hand so tight she winced slightly. “I can't go there alone, I don't even what to do.”

Shaking her head, Kaia pulled you into a hug. “You'll be fine, I promise. Now get in the car, Austin will be in in a second.”

“Aus” Your eyes widened, but she already shoved you inside the car. Swallowing against the dryness of your throat you leaned back into the seat. Even sitting down you felt like your knees were going to give away. Then the door on the other side opened and you felt your heart stutter. He looked so handsome in his suit and bow tie.

“Darlin’?” He smiled, his hand reaching for you. “I, what are you doing here?”

“I-I, Kaia, she said I should meet her here and then suddenly they were on me, dressing me up and telling me I was your date for tonight.”

Austin's smile widened as he leaned closer. “I'm not complaining at all, but, are you okay!”

“I don't know.” You shrugged, grabbing his hand in yours and giving it a light squeeze. Thank god the privacy screen was up or you probably wouldn’t have had the courage to talk with him right now. “I keep thinking that I might have hit my head, that maybe Kaia really hated me and I'm up in that room and wake up soon.”

He chuckled softly, shaking his head. “I assure you, you're very awake. Because if you aren't then I'm asleep as well and it would be such an amazing dream.” Leaning in, his lips brushed against your cheek. 

“I'm sorry about before.” Your eyes watered, leaning your forehead against his own, the fingers of your free hand brushing along his chin, the light stubble scratching your palm. “Truth is, I never wanted to fall in love with you. I loved before and was hurt badly in the process. But you were so different and you were in a relationship. Your a celebrity, I'm just me, I'm a nobody. And the girls, they are my world and you were the only one putting them first, not even their own father does that.”

His Adam's apple bopped and you could see his emotions swirling in his ocean eyes. “You're not a nobody, darlin’, you're somebody to me and if I'm honest with you, I never wantesnto fall in love with you either but Lottie and Millie made it hard not to fall in love and in the end all I wanted was the three of you with me.”

Your eyes flitted between his eyes and plush lips, the butterflies dancing inside your belly until you used all your courage and sealed your lips with his, no thought left to the carefully applied lip gloss Sofia used on you. It had taken you months to admit to yourself what you really wanted and now you finally found it. 

Austin's arms wound around your waist, pulling you closer, only just stopping before you straddled his waist. He moaned into his mouth, your arms slinging around his shoulder, fingers playing with the hair in his neck.

“I love you, Austin and I'm sorry I tried to push you away.” You confessed, breaking the kiss.

“I'm happy, you came to your senses. You’ll be my lucky charm tonight.” 

Smirking, your fingers brushing over his lips, taking away the gloss you left there with your kiss. “I'll try to be the best lucky charm you can have.”

“The best and everyone will be jealous of me having the most beautiful woman of the night in my arms.” Chuckling, Austin’s hand moved up along your bare back. “I love that dress.”

“Hm, I think I like it as well.” You had to give it to Sandra, she was a master of her art. She truly made you irresistible to him. "Oh, you want to call the girls before you head off to the carpet?"

“Yes, I missed them today.”

He brushed his lips against your temple, leaning against you as you grabbed your phone from the clutch his stylist grabbed for you.

“Mummy! Austin!” Lottie called loudly, jumping off the sofa to sit next to her little sister who was coloring a page of her Elvis coloring book. “Granny said you were going to a party tonight and we could stay up to watch you win that award.”

“Lottie, I don't think that's what granny really meant.” You admonished, but knew they'd probably be too tired to watch it all once the ceremony started.

“Right, little lady, you listen to your mama, no staying up late just to see me, okay? I'll meet up with you tomorrow, take you girls out to have some ice cream, how's that sound?”

Your heart swelled, listening to him talk to your daughters that way. He truly was made to be a dad one day and you hoped this was actually what he really wanted.

“Now, I'll be heading off to the red carpet, take some nice pictures for you and then you can watch the start of the show. If there's a camera I'll send some kisses your way, okay? You be good for your grandma and grandpa and listen to what they say.”

They nodded their little heads, accompanied by aha’s and uhu’s before they sent Austin off with big kisses and loads of good luck. You waved your goodbyes at them and enjoyed the rest of the ride talking about his upcoming projects and the rest of awards season.

Of course you were his lucky charms that night. He won his BAFTA and you couldn't have been prouder of him than you were at the moment he accepted his award.

The video of you running into his arms and kissing him soundly was one of the most viewed of the night, but in that moment, you couldn't care less if everyone knew about you.

[travelling-on-the-octopath]

Since you're a Dimiclaude shipper, and since I enjoyed your GW commentary (since I quit GW at chapter 11 lol), I was wondering if maybe you could help me to understand the popularity and appeal of Dimiclaude. I must confess I've been confused by it's popularity since 3H, given that Claude and Dimitri barely interacted in 3H. Sure, Claude did a bit in AM but not much. Dimitri was so unimportant to VW. And now, Hopes has only made me more confused given GW is a mess, even if AG had something.

MY DAY HAS COME.

I should start off by saying this is in no way an attempt to force someone to like a ship they don't like. The whole point of this is to have a mighty good time. I'm gonna go over the big stuff, the small stuff, and then the stuff I've noticed with my own two eyes that isn't highlighted in the story at all, but to me is interesting/fun to think about.

Before I get into the meat of it: It doesn't go over my head, or that of a vast majority of other shippers, that Dimitri and Claude don't have the same screen time as most other ships, who have supports and main-story event interactions that bolster their popularity. But it's the mainline screen time they do have that sort of makes every other little thing great. (For the most part I'm staying away from Hopes because, well. Because.)

I do get what you're saying about Claude having a small role in AM, but that role still stands out pretty starkly when you look at the game as a whole; Dimitri has a whole chapter in his route dedicated to aiding the leader of another faction when the other leaders are any combination of MIA or set to be killed. The other routes just . . . don't have this (unless you want to count saving Rhea in VW, but that was in tandem with taking down the Empire, so--not dedicated). Routes/maps dedicated to killing faction leaders, sure (Enbarr, Tailtean, Fhirdiad, Derdriu), but never going out of your way to save them. Claude's role is small, sure, but for a background character? He becomes pretty important. I mean, it's only because of him that the Kingdom army is allowed to succeed. He distracts Imperial loyalists to allow them through to Myrddin, which is yet another example of them working together/Claude believing in Dimitri's war effort, enough so that exacerbates the Alliance's infighting even further for them to pass peacefully. The Kingdom army ran the marathon, sure, but Claude was their pair of premium running shoes.

That, at least, sets the stage for their dynamic on AM specifically. Dimitri is someone Claude is more than willing to work with during the war. Why? Well, their goals are aligned. And, the game seems keen on telling us one thing:

Claude knows Dimitri more than one would think.

This seems like an unimportant dialogue choice, because Claude says the same thing regardless of your choice. It arguably would be unimportant, if Claude didn't prove he does, in fact, know Dimitri well within the same conversation:

This isn't a generic speech; this is someone who knows Dimitri's unfailing and detrimental empathy, and likely the more gritty details of it. This is someone who . . . well. Knows Dimitri. They're not total strangers (they have their moments of familiarity/friendliness in WC, as I'll continue to blab about), and it shows. Boom, a world of fic opens up: did they spend enough time together at school for Claude to have an inkling as to Dimitri's ghosts? Has he kept tabs on the inner workings of the kingdom army the whole time? dimiclaude intrigue: sparked.

And it goes both ways. Dimitri doesn't buy Claude's bullshit for a damn second; he never has.

Could you argue that Dimitri just reads him wrong? Sure. But that's not in Dimitri's character, and he's the farthest thing from naïve. Add that to his track record of him reading Claude like a flyer advertising the opening of a business (which I go into a little later), and you have a mutual understanding between people who, for a variety of reasons, live behind varying numbers of shields. How did Dimitri come to know Claude's heart that well? dimiclaude interest: ignited.

Claude collects as many facts as are available to him; what he saw told him to place his faith in Dimitri, as both a military leader and a person whose heart is too big for his chest. And, here comes my one mention of Hopes, Dimitri has that same faith in him on Azure Gleam. Do I think it has the same foundation, given that they spent a fraction of their time at Garreg Mach? Nope. But it's sweet, that he's so unendingly confident that Claude will come in in clutch and save the Kingdom's collective ass. And it remains true that they're complementary here, even if they're not as familiar with each other. The idea that a one-man army and Speculation And Distrust Incarnate(TM) would fight back-to-back? That's the tasty shit. Good. This version of dimiclaude is primed for the political allies trope (and arguably ARE the political allies trope, with a little heavier emphasis on it than the potential "high school" sweethearts, or long-distance flirting à la the end of AM, or the tragedy of a post non-AM alternate universe, etc). It isn't as fulfilling as Houses dimiclaude, for a number of reasons, but it is cute. (And as much as it angers me when I think about it Seriously, shout out to the fact that they seem to have a telepathic fuckin link on GW lmao??? "he wants me to do this i know he does i know it" and "he just invaded my country. but somehow i can tell he meant no lasting harm by it/doesn't intend to conquer faerghus" WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU TWO??FGLKJDFG)

Little things about them inside the narrative that make me go insane:

> These tweets showcase that in Japanese, during the Battle of the Eagle and Lion, Dimitri meets Claude's Bullshit(TM) blow for blow; if you don't want to peruse, more than okay. I'll summarize: In the English translation, it got lost a little that Dimitri was impersonating someone who got riled up by what Claude said, rather than actually getting riled up only to realize Claude's intentions partway through. He pretends to get all uppity, and honestly the delivery+the whole interaction is so cute. Frankly, it's really great for great for both of them; Claude isn't unpredictable and unknowable, and Dimitri is a bit of a brat who likes a sprinkle of fun in battles that aren't life or death. The moment is still cute in English, even if it makes english!Dimitri read more straitlaced than his Japanese counterpart.

Side note but he is SO unbothered when Claude tries this the first time ldfgkjdfg it's no wonder it didn't work at the Battle of the Eagle and Lion either (at least in Japanese). Reads Claude like a book in size 64 font lmao

> They're the only lords seen talking to each other in an exploration on the weekend, which is one of those piddly little crumbs that means fuck all, but I do think it's cute. (And I point out their positions as route lords because they, as heads of their factions, have the least reason to interact. Dimitri talks about EdeIgard/has scenes with her because Reasons, while she and Claude are caught in a constant loop of "I'm going to make this sly yet cutting comment and you're going to respond with something equally sly and cunning and at the end of it all we're going to kill each other, so." It's just nice that dimiclaude is ally-/friend-coded because the other two lord dynamics are Something.) Lumping into here: the battle for Garreg Mach scene where they fight side by side (fighting together yet again), and the prologue cutscene where they run up together. Could they have been on complete opposite sides of the field and met each other at that exact moment? Yes. Will I choose to believe the other explanation? Always <3 it's part of the fun.

> At Derdriu, Claude tells everyone else they're right on time, but tells Dimitri he's late and snaps at him to hurry up. Seems to me like Dimitri brings out the brat in Claude the way Claude brings out the bitch in Dimitri lgkjdflgkj. Or, if you want to flip it, Claude pretends everything is fine in front of everyone else and Dimitri is the only one he can be honestly frustrated/frazzled with.

> (And on that note, their interaction at Gronder in Japanese pleases me greatly because of how audibly frustrated/angry Claude is and how good those moments are for his character. He's someone who adapts to situations on the fly, and to do that he has to remain calm. It seems Dimitri might just make him lose it more often than most dgldkfjg.)

> Listen I just find this cute as shit

> Claude gives Dimitri the heirloom of his house; the physical manifestation of his claim to Fódlani lineage is something he trusts in Dimitri's hands, when he could have just left it where it belongs: with House Riegan. For a character whose core revolves around being from more than one place, it's a gift of a pretty hefty emotional weight.

> And on the heels of that, Claude imagines Dimitri in his future, or maybe playing a part in Dimitri's, on the foundation of their shared political goals. It opens them up to a massive, massive world of post-canon fic where the crumbs we got in the game can be tasted and replicated to make a full cake--three tiers, airy buttercream icing, sugar-paste flowers, the works. At that point they would both be kings, and the darkest parts of their lives would be behind them, and the possibility of it is created in the game itself.

Little things (mostly) outside the narrative that make me go insane:

> Dimitri's Crest looks like a star, while Claude's looks like a moon. Given that their motifs are moons (Azure Moon, Paraselene) and stars (Fallen Star, God-Shattering Star) respectively, I allow myself to vibrate when thinking about it.

> They both grew up in countries that prize combat prowess; peak fic fodder

> Dimitri's Relic-specialized Combat Art, Atrocity, is about doing battle and wrecking everything and anything; Claude's, Fallen Star, is about avoiding combat entirely. Indicative of their fighting styles, and speaks to the aspects of their character that make fitting them together so fun and interesting. Dimitri's impatience+raw strength in combat paired with Claude's pragmaticism+adaptability. It's good shit.

> Dimitri's real-world constellation is Sagittarius; Claude's is Leo. Descendant of the King of Lions with archer stars and the archer who inherits Failnaught having lion stars???? call that star-crossed lo--and i'm pulled off stage. But that leads me to:

> They both hold a certain degree of antagonism toward trusting higher powers meddling in their lives, which makes their focus on either the present or the future well-suited to each other, and intrinsic parts of their characters. Star-crossed by accident, but the greatest part is that they choose to come together a number of times.

> Their messy, messy relationships with their family, and apparently they can relate to having their family members actively try to kill them lmao ???

/

The appeal to me, at the end of the day, is that while they're vastly different, they're not at all opposites. They're complementary. They exist on different points of an axis, but they keep the same rhythm and movement that keeps them from hindering each other. They're both fundamentally good people with a certain sharpness to their intellect that makes them compelling as anything from allies to romantic partners. Claude dreams, and he dreams big, but he's smart about it; he knows his limits, and finds ways to push them without breaking them. Dimitri has recently come out of being sunk neck-deep in the past, but all the same wants a world that's better for the people he's responsible for. Even on a level of aspirations and political goals, they're aligned. They're equals, in power and wit and heart.

They're just neat <3

I feel like I've bombarded you enough for now fglkjdflg but feel free to come back any time if my dimiclaude babbling has piqued your interest. If not, thank you for letting me babble regardless ^^"

[ladycavaliier-blog]

fleurprxnce replied to your post:    irene.exe has crashed once again. please hold.

but thats a fact 8(

   BURIES HER FACE IN HER HANDS. INIGO, PLEASE...