#... now how i am gonna handle writing you two when i get to that part in my story?
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astonmartinii · 1 year ago
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into the arms of another part two | max verstappen social media au
pairing: max verstappen x reader
part two to this !! part three
yourusername
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liked by arthurleclerc, maxverstappen1 and 661,230 others
yourusername: winner winner chicken dinner !! congrats maxy i’m so proud of you always
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user1: i know charles’ head is hot right now
user2: i hope netflix are taking notes cause this tea is steaming hot
maxverstappen1: thank you baby, helps when i have the prettiest cheerleader in the world
yourusername: i am the sexiest sargent in all of the orange army
maxverstappen1: too right you are
user3: i miss when y/n was the head of the tifosi the red monochromatic fits ate so hard
user4: i need charles to pull his head out of his ass and apologise so we can reclaim her before monza
user5: do not even bring up the fact we may not have custody of her for monza
danielricciardo: leave some for the rest of us maxy
yourusername: no actually i think it’s illegal for max not to win sorry
danielricciardo: will that change if charlie apologises?
yourusername: considering that hasn’t happened and doesn’t look to be happening any time soon - no.
user6: CHARLES PLEASE DO SOMETHING
user7: he doesn’t have to do anything, she’s just bitter cause she’s always been the bridesmaid and never the bride. we ALL know she’s always loved charles and she can’t handle that she’s not the centre of his attention it’s kinda pathetic
maxverstappen1: what made you think you know any of us enough to comment something like this? what told you that you even had a right to talk about y/n like that? she’s everything you could ever wish to be and more and she will never ever deserve the things you people are saying about her. charles would be lucky to have y/n in his life platonically or romantically but it’s his loss
user8: boyf of the year right here
user9: charles take note ^^^ this is how you’re meant to defend your best friend
landonorris: i am once again asking for photo credits i’m not gonna be your personal photographer for free
maxverstappen1: i literally paid for your dinner
yourusername: you’re literally a millionaire
landonorris: i don’t care a man still likes to be wined and dined
yourusername: just to make it clear we are not looking for a third
user10: i promise i can change your mind give me a chance
f1tea
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liked by user11, user12 and 2,349 others
f1tea: charles leclerc caught liking this tweet about the situation between him and y/n. seems like he won’t back down on this. what do you think?
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user13: i need this mans head on a spike i’m so serious
user14: i want to play pinball with the single marble in his head
user15: i think ferrari have genuinely caused real head rot in him cause no way he thinks this is a serve
user16: let's be real charles' biggest rivals are ferrari and himself
user17: not this man at his BIG AGE is liking shady tweets about his best friend
user18: i think it's safe to say they're not best friends any more
user19: also "biggest rival" my ass max and charles are fucking friends now so this whole narrative is complete horse shit
user20: i'm so bored of charles playing the victim bro YOU ARE THE INSTIGATOR YOU ARE THE PROBLEM
user21: the way charles is liking shit like this but max is writing whole ass essays in the comments defending her
user22: and that''s why i'll always back that she ended up with the right man
user23: max is so far in the lead in the championship i need him to take charles out for the narrative
user24: are we in high school? like seriously this is so fucking petty i cannot wait for media day this weekend
user25: he's either gonna be the funniest man in the world or he's gonna bite someones fucking head off
user26: and i'll back it either way
user27: i know y/n is about to have her revenge dress moment in the paddock someone get kym illman ready STAT.
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f1wagsupdates
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liked by lilymunhe, carmenmundt and 4,530 others
tagged: yourusername
f1wagsupdates: REVENGE DRESS MOMENT !!! y/n y/ln enters the paddock in monza in this stunning black dress, showing the world what a catch she is, oh and that is max holding the umbrella for her, what a gentleman.
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user28: mother came to slay i cannot even
user29: this right after max came for charles in the press conference is PERFECTION + NO RED IN MONZA !!
user30: i see lily and carmen in the likes in knew they'd be on the right side
user31: girl i don't think anyone is on charles' side
user32: yall see the stink eye from the red bull garage when charles walked past they have y/n's back LOL
user33: the red bull garage been ride or dies for max so it defo makes sense that they would extend that to y/n
user34: christian was defo waiting for a question about it in the press conference
user35: someone on twitter got a clip of him putting his arm around fred going out of the paddock and telling him to get his driver under control
user36: yall are we on the kardashians what the fuck is going on
user37: people may hate christian but he defends his driver so much that he's inserting himself in the relationship drama
user38: i don't even follow f1 but whoever this is this serving oh my
user39: this is so exhausting like i need charles to just apologise so we can get cute y/n x max x charles content
user40: torturing myself thinking about how cute that dynamic could be
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f1
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liked by yourusername, maxverstappen1 and 1,203,457 others
f1: max verstappen clinches his tenth win of the season at monza, joined by sergio perez and oscar piastri. home heroes charles leclerc and carlos sainz came together at turn one, awful showing for ferrari in monza
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user41: this narrative is so so poetic
user42: i feel bad for the tifosi at this point y'all get your hopes up every season
user43: charles you aimed the wrong way if you wanted to take max out
user44: the way max kissed y/n after winning god they're so cute
user45: also the way christian got everyone to move so y/n could get to the front to see max
user46: even marko looked happy about it what is going on?
user47: y'all we knew it was gonna be bad for ferrari y/n wasn't wearing red, call me superstitious but every time she's worn red charles has either won or been on the podium
user48: well that's just what he gets for not appreciating her
user49: as fernando would say KARMA
user50: someone check charles' blood pressure please
maxverstappen1
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liked by christianhorner, yourusername and 1,304,662 others
tagged: yourusername
maxverstappen1: winning on and off the track, some of you can't relate.
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user51: parents omg
danielricciardo: fighting words maxy, not pulling your punches
maxverstappen1: i do my fighting on the track, not my fault people can't get past turn one to give me a real battle
danielricciardo: i need to be inside your brain
maxverstappen1: no there's images of y/n in my brain that no other man will ever see
danielricciardo: you crack me up maxy
yourusername: woah who's that fine ass piece of woman
maxverstappen1: she's taken sorry
yourusername: that's a shame, i hope that man is taking care of her
maxverstappen1: i don't believe she's got any complaints
yourusername: wow you sound like a gentleman, she's a lucky woman
maxverstappen1: believe me i am the lucky one.
yourusername: awwww maxy you're literally the sweetest person in the world
user52: if i was charles and i saw this after that race you'd have to restrain me i'm so serious
user53: i'm happy for y/n and max but i need them to stop being happy in my face
alexalbon: ur welcome for that first picture btw
yourusername: lily taught you well
alexalbon: so no thanks?
yourusername: i joke thank you very much sir albon
user54: so like all of the twitch quartet are on y/n's side? awkward.
yourusername
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liked by maxverstappen1, georgerussell63, 706,835 others
tagged: charles_leclerc
yourusername: charles and i have been best friends since i knew what the word meant and it really hurts that is has gotten to this point. when charles got his first girlfriend i chalked it up to the excitement of the experience, but when he routinely got in and out of relationships and falling back on our friendship once scorned, i started to question what he really felt about our friendship. i overlooked it every time even when it made me doubt my worth and hoped our friendship meant more. however, the cycle continued and after being left stranded at a beach in a country i do not know i decided it was the end. i have reached out to you so, so many times and want nothing more than our friendship to work and so we can be life-long friends that we can tell our kids about. but i guess it's not worth that much to you and that's something i'll have to reconcile with. the only positive coming from this the fact that it pushed me to the love of my life, so thank you for that.
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charles_leclerc
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liked by joristrouche, pierregasly and 1,305,783 others
charles_leclerc: i've already got my trophy, sorry not sorry.
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user56: WHAT THE FUCK
user57: my brain is actually scrambled
user58: charles' must be as well cause no way he thought this was a good idea
landonorris: so this is a low blow
charles_leclerc: since when were you the reference point for morals
landonorris: damn dude, you're in the wrong but go off i guess
user59: why do i actually want to cry for y/n right now? she did this whole ass heartfelt post with no comments so people wouldn't be able to speculate and he replies with a pic of his gf's ASS
danielricciardo: not cool dude
charles_leclerc: i see you all took her side and our friendships mean fuck all
danielricciardo: kinda ironic you bring up respecting friendships
charles_leclerc: spare me the lecture
maxverstappen1: you're a child. but this is the closure she needs. cheers to being an asshole.
charles_leclerc: so you managed to get some of my sloppy seconds, you're welcome
maxverstappen1: she's not sloppy seconds and i can't believe you'd refer to her as that. but if you wanna talk sloppy seconds you can hold the 100 point gap between us in the championship. and y/n will never say this so i'll say it for her GO FUCK YOURSELF
user60: SHOTS FIRED
user61: men are so confusing
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yourusername added to their story
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[caption: taking some time for myself. thank you for your kind words and know i have an amazing support system around me now]
f1wagsupdates
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liked by user65, user66 and 5,430 others
tagged: charles_leclerc
f1wagsupdates: charles leclerc spotted outside y/n y/ln's office with flowers this afternoon. idk at this point, any time i report on this man i lose more brain cells.
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user67: lol even wag page admins are done
f1wagsupdates: he gives me a lot of content but damn he needs to sort his head out
user68: lol this is gonna be an all time apology tour i can't wait
user69: i honestly don't want y/n to forgive him he doesn't deserve it.
user70: yeah max has proven ride or die for y/n so i know who she should stick with
user71: i need him to donate his brain to science cause in what world is a measly bouquet of flowers gonna cover all of this shit ?
user72: legit he's systematically ditched his best friend, let randomers on the internet drage her name through the mud and then liked it and then flaunted the fact that he didn't care about their friendship for everyone to see
maxverstappen1: lol nice try
user73: my petty king i love him so much
user74: i know y/n is taking a break from social media but i hope she knows how much love she's getting
user75: for real we're all on her side i hope she slammed that door in charles' face
user76: i hope that bouquet ended up in the bin
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maxverstappen1 added to their story
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[caption: special delivery for a special girl]
note: i know this was heavily requested so here it is!! i really like it and it's defo open for a third part if yall want charles and y/n to reconcile? thank you for reading xx
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mionemymind · 7 months ago
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Give Me Another Chance
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Summary: The five times Y/n asks Wanda to give her another chance and the one time Wanda says yes.
Warnings: Angst, No Happy Ending, Dying, No Part Two?
A/n: Was heavily inspired to write this angst after reading Marry Me by @just-aake Theirs had a happy ending to it so I highly suggest reading their lovely work.
Word Count: 1.6k
Masterlist
“Give me another chance, Wanda,” Y/n pleaded as the two walked through the compound late for their meeting. It was 8:30 am. The group was instructed to arrive for the mission briefing at 8:15 am. Wanda barely had time to brush her teeth before she ran out of her room and immediately bumped into the last person she wanted to speak to, her ex. 
“Shut it, Y/n.” Y/n sighed as she kept her mouth shut. The headache coming from drinking too much poured into her head like a tsunami. “I blame you if we get the short end of this mission.” Before Y/n could respond, the two finally arrived at the conference room.
“You’re late.” Steve deadpanned. “We-” 
“No excuses Y/n, you and Wanda are on backup duty. Stay in the quinjet until asked.” Wanda groveled silently as she was handed the mission file by Natasha. Y/n stood behind Bucky and peered over his notes. 
“This was going to be a long day,” Y/n thought. 
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“Give me another chance, Wanda,” Y/n begged through the phone. She was walking through the bustling streets of downtown New York to find Wanda. The girl had mysteriously gone out for the night and decided to tell no one about her location. This was nothing new to the team, even Natasha knew it was something that Wanda did to feel better about herself after their breakup.
But tonight felt different to Y/n. It was already past midnight and Wanda hadn’t come back home. Y/n called again only for the phone to go straight to voicemail for the 10th time tonight. “Watch where you’re going asshole!” 
“Sorry,” Y/n mouthed as she walked away. Realistically, Y/n knew that Wanda could handle herself even if she was impaired, her magic subconsciously protected her in situations like this. But the worry that pitted her stomach told her otherwise. 
“Where could you be?” Y/n thought out loud. Looking around the surrounding buildings, Y/n’s eyes settled on the Chrysler building. Like a light bulb, a switch flipped in her head. Running to the nearest empty alleyway, Y/n called for her suit and flew to the top of the building. 
In all her glory there was Wanda lying on the edge of the Chrysler building. Her cheeks were flushed as she held the near empty bottle on her stomach. The remainder of the six-pack lay waste on the floor. Wanda didn’t know how much time had passed since she started drinking. The near numbness in her lips indicated that it had been a while. 
Y/n landed with a soft thud, not wanting to scare Wanda off.  She checked her watch and it was already 2:00 am, a new record for Wanda. Leaving her suit behind, Y/n walked slowly to Wanda. Once she was within arm's reach, Y/n securely held her by the waist. 
“What are you doing here?” Wanda didn’t have to turn her head to know who it was. The feeling of sensing Y/n was something she used to enjoy. Now it was just a constant reminder of their failed relationship. 
“I’m here to take you home. It’s late Wanda.” Wanda sighed as she let Y/n gently grab the bottle from her hand. “Why can’t you just leave me alone?”
“You’re drunk Wanda.” 
“And you’re the asshole that left me.” Y/n ignored the insult thrown her way and picked Wanda up bridal style. “You’re gonna get hypothermia if you stay out here.” Y/n looked down at Wanda when she didn’t respond back. The brunette was already deep asleep as she nuzzled her head into Y/n’s chest. 
When Wanda woke up the next day, she refused to ask who took her home. Not when her thoughts already lingered about Y/n. 
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“Give me another chance, Wanda,” Y/n whispered as she held Wanda’s hand. The brunette was dressed in an all-black skin-tight dress with high heels. She even put make-up on to feel better for the occasion. 
“You don’t deserve me.” Wanda walked away from Y/n and to the open elevator. Their eyes met again as the doors closed. Once she was fully out of sight, Wanda let a tear fall. “Why must you make it so hard for me to move on?” 
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“Give me another chance-”
“Are you serious right now?” Wanda was in disbelief. “You. Fucked. Up.” She poked at Y/n’s chest. “Not me. And now you want me to seriously give you another chance?
“I understand that I fucked up-”
“No! You don’t! You broke up with me and left me to sort things out by myself. And cowardly enough, you went on a mission just to avoid talking to me.”
“Let me explain-”
“Explain? What is there to explain? I’ve begged and begged so many times before for you to tell me the truth. Each time you would shut me out and disappear. You never had the decency to tell me anything. But now when it’s convenient for you, I suddenly am the bad guy for not hearing you out. “
Wanda shoved Y/n out of her room. “All you did was make me wonder why I ever deserved that type of treatment when all I ever did was love you.”
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“I’m sorry I keep messing things up,” Y/n groaned. The bruises on her chest made it hard to breathe or maybe it was the blood she could taste in her mouth. Regardless, everything hurts. “I wasn’t really thinking when I broke up with you back then.” 
Wanda ignored the burning feeling in her chest as she continued to rip apart the indestructible chair Y/n was cuffed to. “Are you serious right now? Y/n please use your fucking smart brain and help me get you out.” 
Wanda concentrated back on her powers to try and rip apart one of the steel cuffs. When the cuff didn’t give, Wanda stopped in frustration. “Why isn’t this working?” 
“‘Cause they knew you would be the one to get me.” Wanda furrowed her brows, not understanding who “they” was. “What are you talking about?” 
A loud pitch echoed through the chambers as the intercom turned on. “Countdown commences. Ten minutes till detonation.” The large screen behind Wanda flickered as the countdown was displayed in bright red. 
“Tony! I need you to locate the bomb. Y/n is stuck in this chair and I can’t get her out of it.” Wanda looked around the room once more but the lack of controls and buttons made it feel useless. 
Wanda hurried back to Y/n at the sound of her coughing up more blood. “What did they do to you dekta?” Y/n tried her best to grin, not wanting to show Wanda how much pain she was in. 
“You’ve done worse to me in training,” Y/n joked but none of it sat right with Wanda’s conscience. Using her shirt, Wanda wiped part of the blood that came out. She used her free hand to locate the source of the bleeding. 
“Wanda,” her green eyes focused on the brown eyes she loved. “I think I’m dying.” 
“Shh shh - don’t talk like that dekta.” Wanda located a small tear inside Y/n’s organs and used her magic to pause the bleeding. “We’re gonna get you out of here.” 
“I’m sorry for all the times I’ve failed you.” 
“What-”
“And I’m sorry for leaving you.” 
“Now is not the time-” 
“We’re out of time my love.” Y/n glanced to the screen in front of them. Only five minutes left before it detonated. 
“Any updates Tony?! We have five minutes left!” Wanda yelled. 
“I’m trying my best here. We’re swarmed!”
“Wanda - I need you to listen-”
“No!” Wanda declared. She looked at Y/n with a deadly stare. “Stop acting like that - like this is our last chance.” Wanda refused to believe that the world would be cruel to let the love of her life slip past her. Not when they haven’t sorted everything out. Not when things are still bad. 
“I love you,” Y/n whispered with a tired smile. Wanda could feel Y/n’s energy draining by the second. The longer she went without medical attention, the slimmer her chances of survival grew. She gripped on Y/n’s shirt, trying her best to keep her cries at bay. 
“Don’t-” Wanda sobbed as tears fell down her face. “This isn’t how I wanted you to confess. I deserve a confession where dying isn’t involved.” 
“One minute remaining,” the announcement said. Y/n’s eyes started to droop. Her consciousness was slipping by the second. Wanda cupped Y/n’s cheek and lightly tapped her face. 
“Wake up dekta.” Y/n slowly opened her eyes. “Ask me again.” 
“What?” 
“Tell me you want me back.” Wanda pressed her forehead against Y/n’s. “Tell me to give you another chance and I will. I’ll give you all the chances in the world so just ask me.” 
“Wanda…will you give me another chance my love?”
0:00
The world slowed down as the bomb deep under the building blew up. Wanda could feel the blast reaching to them as she created a magic barrier that surrounded her and Y/n. And as it continued to explode around them, Wanda leaned in and kissed Y/n hoping that the last thing the dying girl felt was her love. 
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readerstories · 22 days ago
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When You Touch Me - Wolverine x male reader x Deadpool 3/?
I love writing this so much, it's not going to be a quick thing for sure. I'm thinking and plotting constantly. (AO3) (Part 1) (Part 2) (Part 4) (Part 5) (Part 6)
Warnings/tags: male reader, canon-typical violence, enemies to friends to lovers, eventual smut, slow burn, stiches
Wordcount: 2675
Summary: You’ve heard many stories about how people met their soulmates. Everyone crazier than the last, ranging from typical meet cutes, meeting with one of them at death's door, in war, meeting at your soulmate's wedding to another, and everything in between and outside of that. You had just never expected to add yours to the crazy list, meeting yours in a fight, only realizing after trying to kill each other for at least half an hour. And you certainly don’t expect to have another.
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Silence fills the apartment.
For a few moments.
“Red, I am going to kill you.”
“Wade, I am going to stab you.” Both of you talk at the same time, then glare at the other. You notice that his eyes are a nice shade of hazel, before your gaze snaps to Wade as he speaks.
“Why am I getting the heat for this?!” 
“You ran.” You and Flannel say in unison, glaring at each other again. His hand is still on your neck, warm and solid.
He raises an eyebrow as you reach for your pants, you grab one of your knives out of its hidden sheath, stabbing his shoulder. He grunts with pain, hand clutching at your neck for a moment before pulling it away. You pull your knife back out, before putting it parallel between two of Flannel’s claws, twisting it hard as you can, somewhat pushing his claws further apart. He winches, and the claws retract, allowing you to quickly slide away, and then take a few steps back. You notice there is no trace of where they came from on his knuckles, so this guy must have some sort of healing factor too. 
Fucking great.
“Why are you armed if you came here to meet your soulmate?” He scowls at you.
“Like you can talk, Mr Knuckle Claws.” He growls, fucking growls, and you would mock the absurdity of it, but his claws are coming back out. 
You grab your second knife, spinning them once in your hand, steeling yourself. Flannel lurches forward, one set claws aimed for your throat. You deflect them, your arm almost vibrates with the effort it takes to stop the swinging momentum, but you don’t have time to reflect on it, his other set of claws coming for your left arm. You stop these too, but you don’t have to stop a third or fourth swipe, as Wade drags Flannel backwards by the shoulders, making the man stumble and almost fall.
“Nu uh! No murdering of our soulmate peanut, they don’t have a healing factor!” Flannel huffs, glaring at you again, but his claws retract. 
You want to stab him. 
You are pretty sure the feeling is mutual. 
Irritation coming across the bond, if somewhat muted. You also want to stab Wade, because fuck him, you could fight Mr Scowl on your own merit. You don’t sheat your knives yet, staring at them both, hand clenched tight around the handles. Flannel scowls at you.
“Gonna put those away bub?”
“Trying to figure out if I can get to both of your hearts from here.” Flannel snorts.
“For me it takes at least some candles and a nice dinner with gifts, then it’s all yours.” Wade winks at you, you feel your eye twitch in irritation.
Flannel sniffs the air suddenly, nose wrinkling.
“Why do I smell blood?”
“What?” You look down at your chest, suddenly realizing there are wet spots forming on your dark shirt. “Shit.”  You pull the collar away from your skin, looking down and seeing blood trickle slowly from the gauze on your chest.
“Great, popped a fucking stitch. Thank you asshole. Now Evelyn is gonna tear me a new one.”
“Aw pookie, cheating on as already? Tell me, what is she, a nurse that found you on her doorstep and took care of you, and now you make sweet, sweet love like in so many fanfictions?”
“Don’t call me that, and no, you fucking moron, she’s a veterinarian, a friend, and we are both gay in the wrong direction for whatever the fuck kind of fantasy you have in that scarred brain of yours.” You put your knives back in their sheats hidden under your pants, ignoring how two sets of eyes follow the motion.
“I hope you guys got a first aid kit around here somewhere. I assume that the old lady and whoever else you guys have over aren’t all super healers.” Wade and Flannel look at each other.
“I’ll see if I can find anything between Al’s coke in the bedroom.” Wade walks off, leaving you and Flannel alone in the room. It’s not long, maybe a minute, but it lets you feel the confusion coming through your bond from him, and a swirl of other emotions that are hard to identify through the still very fresh bond.
You wonder what he feels from you, as neither of you say anything, just watching the other. A shot of guilt comes through your bond, which makes you scowl at him.
“Don’t you fucking dare.”
“What?”
“Pretend like you care.”
“You’re our s-”
“Say it and will stab you. I know you probably can’t die, but I will give my best damn try.” He scowls, again, but doesn’t say anything. Wade comes back then, a little red and solid bag with a white plus sign on in one hand. You reach out to take it, but Wade pulls it out of reach for you.
“Give me the damn med kit Wade.”
“Nah ah, better for me to do it, promise I’ll be gentle, done it before.” 
“No, Wade.” He sighs, a second later there’s a gun aimed at you. Where the fuck that even came from, you don’t know. You wouldn’t be surprised if Wade was armed before you even came here though.
“You just stopped Flannel from attacking me, now you are aiming a gun at me?” You tilt your head, and Wade shrugs. Flannel seems frozen, eyes flicking between the two of you, arms tense at his side again.
“His name is Logan, and he would not have made it non-lethal, but I will.” He’s serious, you can tell by the flat tone in his voice, the most level and even it has ever been in the times you have heard him speak. You look into his eyes, a lovely shade of brown that is filled with stony seriousness.
Getting shot would fucking suck.
It would hurt.
It would take forever to heal.
It would make you weak for a good while.
You sigh, rubbing your face, opting for the lesser of two evils. 
You think.
You’re tired.
“Fine.” The gun is moved away, safety clicked on, and tucked into the waistband of Wade’s pants. He takes a few steps away from you, picking up takeaway boxes (that you hadn’t noticed, but to be fair all your attention had been on the other two men) off the dining room table, handing them off to Logan, who takes them to the kitchen. Wade pats the table.
“Up you go pumpkin.” You roll your eyes, too tired and annoyed at your bleeding wounds to tell him to not call you that. You don’t think he will stop. You sit on the table, taking your jacket and shirt off, dumping them on the floor before laying back. Wade whistles, dropping the med kit next to your shoulder as you glare at him.
“Nasty.” 
“Your fucking handiwork.” You tilt your head to look at Logan where he leans in the doorway to the kitchen. “And yours, since I’m bleeding again.” He grimaces, opening his mouth as if to say something, but then closes it. A hand brushes against the gauze covering your stomach wound.
“Gonna take this off now.” Wade’s voice is soft, you give him a weird look, but he’s not looking at you, but instead he’s looking at his hand where it lays gently on top of the gauze.
“Yeah, yeah, just get it over with.”
“Hey, consent is sexy.”
“This isn’t-” You stop yourself, grimacing at the feeling of gauze lifting off your blood soaked skin. The wound drips more freely now, blood trickling down onto the table. A blue towel appears next to Wade, Logan is quiet on his feet, you hadn’t even noticed he went anywhere. Wade takes the towel, cleaning up the blood as best he can. The towel is soft against your skin, you watch him for a few seconds before moving your focus to the ceiling. 
Wade leaves the towel on your stomach, gently prodding at the wound. You grimace, the feeling unpleasant.
“This isn’t too bad, you only need two new stitches, pookie.”
“Get on with it then.” You hear the flicker of a lighter, glancing down to see Wade hovering a needle in and out of the flame. You know it’s not going to be as well done as Evelyn’s, but you don’t want to go back there and get an earful. 
Or more likely, yelled at until your whole body feels like it is on fire.
Eyes back to the ceiling, you take a deep breath as you feel Wade’s fingers press just beneath the wound. Then there’s some sort of black cloth, a small towel you are guessing, hovering over your face. You tilt your head to look at Logan, who offers it up with a little shake and a raised brow. You nod, opening your mouth, letting him drop it so you can bite down on it just as the needle pierces your skin.
It’s not a pleasant sensation, so you bite down on the towel, forcing yourself to take measured and deep breaths as you stare at the ceiling, concentrating on a little damp spot you can see in one corner.
What a charming space.
“You know, next time you are shirtless, I hope you are going to be bleeding less.” Wade puts the needle aside, wiping his hand on the towel on your stomach. Next he digs around in the medkit again, taking out supplies to cover his (and Evelyn’s) handiwork. You ignore his comment, closing your eyes and just breathing.
You stay like that as he finishes up, and moves onto your chest wound. Once again, the blood soaked material doesn’t feel great coming off, and neither does Wade’s prodding fingers.
“Two again. Beginning to think that’s your lucky number sweetcheeks.” You groan, moving your arm to smack him, hitting a solid thigh. Wade laughs, and it’s such a bizarre situation, you can feel it through your bond, so it takes actual effort to not smile under the towel in your mouth. 
“Alright, alright, I’ll get on with it.” He keeps babbling some more, you tune him out, letting him be background noise as you breathe deeply through your nose as the needle pierces skin again. You flex your fingers and grind your teeth on the towel, willing yourself to stay still to not fuck up Wade’s stitches.
“There we go, all done! Well, almost, I still need to cover my beautiful handiwork, which is a damn shame.” You are not sure if he’s talking about the wound or the stitches, but you don’t care. As he covers it in gauze once more, you take the towel out of your mouth, licking your lips. The towel had soaked up a good deal of moisture from your mouth, so it takes more than a few moments for your mouth to feel normal again. By the time that happens, Wade is done, leaning away from you, gathering up trash, wet towels, and the needle. He takes it away, leaving you and Logan alone again. You sit up on the table, noticing Logan has your shirt in his hand. You reach for it, but he pulls it out of reach from you. Confused, you scrunch your eyebrows. He scrunches up the shirt, one hand in each arms hole, holding the opening for your torso towards you.
“You gotta be kidding me. I’m not that fucking fragile. Let me put my own damn shirt on.” Logan just arches an impressive brow, and you sigh, not willing to fucking wrestle him for your shirt back. Tearing up your stitches again would just be counterintuitive, and you are tired. So you sigh, again, reaching both arms forward.
You let Logan put the shirt on you, you grimace as the mostly dried blood is still present, even if it’s not very visible. The action is weirdly intimate as he stays close afterwards. You let his eyes wander over your face and chest for a few seconds, before you push him away with a boot to his stomach. You could, and you almost do, go for the crotch instead, but you are not certain he wouldn’t actually stab you with his claws if you kicked him in the dick, since Wade isn’t in the room.
“Enough.” Your voice is low, your feelings are a mess, but most of all you are tired. You can’t really make out Logan’s or Wade’s either, it’s all just a jumble in your head now. Christ, you thought having one person sort of in your head was bad, this is just so much messier. Logan hands you your jacket, this one you are allowed (fucking silly as that sounds) to put on by youself. You do it slowly, staring down on the floor, and resolutely not on Logan, or his boots. 
Which is why it’s a short way for your gaze to move as you hear the patter of small paws and claws on the floor, quickly followed by Wade’s pink slippers.
The creature sets itself down at your feet, tail wagging, tongue hanging out. It has mostly grey-brown skin, covered with white tufts of what you think is supposed to be fur. Its eyes are big as it looks up at you, barking once, tongue hanging out of its mouth.
“What the fuck is that thing.” Wade steps forward, bending down to scoop it up.
“That is Dogpool, or Mary Puppins. Say hi!” Wade holds her up to your face, you recoil as much as you can while still seated, as that long tongue tries to lick you.
“Aww, she likes you.” You grimace.
“She’s hideous.” Wade gasps, pressing her close to his chest, pressing a hand over one ear like she can understand you.
“So rude! She’s perfect.” Logan snorts. “Oh shut up you. She takes after her beautiful papa.” You glance down at the cre-, no dog apparently, as you get off the table.
“The dog is uglier.”
“Aw, such a charmer!” You start to walk towards the door, or doorway rather, but are stopped by a hand on your wrist. You look down, and then up at Logan who scowls at you.
“Where the fuck are you going?” 
“Away from here."
“We need to-” 
“We don’t need to do anything. I don’t even know why I came here, I don’t want any of it. Soulmates are messed up, a thing that I don’t care about, a fucking cruel joke of a perverse fucking universe. I’ve seen way too many people get messed up by it all, and I will not be one of them.” You wrench your wrist free, bristling with the concern you can now feel push through everything else in the bond from them both. You send pure anger back, they both frown at you.
“Just read up on how to suppress the bond, learn the fucking mental gymnastics of keeping it and yourselves quiet, and if I start getting a migraine or achy joints, I know where to find you fuckers.”
“We don’t know where to find you. What will we do if we start feeling achy for your love and attention?” You are sure if Wade had eyelashes, they would be fluttering as he blinks rapidly at you, Mary Puppins still in his arms. It’s not quite as confident or flirty as before, he’s trying to hide how disappointed he is at your words, even as you can feel it through your bond.
“Suffer.” This time, none of them tries to stop you as you leave, grumbling to yourself under your breath. 
“Oh, I love how cruel you are pookie, so nasty!” You ignore the nonsense Wade yells after you as you take the stairs, ready to get away from this fucking mess. 
You have two fucking soulmates.
You want to scream, but there’s other people around when you get to the street, but in your mind it’s far from quiet.
FUCK.
(Part 4)
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vinvantae · 3 months ago
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heyyy! sorry if this request is vague but i lack your creative genius so how about the grid x reader with forced proximity (like the two being in a situation where they have to be really close outside of their respective wishes not noncon!). if not all drivers, then maybe just Charles, Lewis and Fernando? thanks love!
I am sooooooo sorry this took so long 😭 I’ve been mega busy lately and haven’t had the time to really sit down and write. Hope you enjoy regardless x
Lewis
“There’s no way this is actually happening right now.”
You stared down at the door handle that was currently laying in your palm, no longer attached to the door. Lewis quirked a brow and plucked it from your hand, turning it over in his a few times.
“I did tell them it was coming loose, didn’t realise it was this close to falling off.” He chuckled softly. “Cosy in here isn’t it?”
The room itself wasn’t that small, but now you had no escape - the walls suddenly felt like they were pressing against you. “Why do we even have this room?”
“I think Bono called it a panic room… apparently, just our luck, it’s also soundproof.”
You groaned and flopped onto the small loveseat that was tucked against the wall - letting your eyes cast around the room. “Have you-���
“Text someone? Yeah. They’re trying to find a way in.” His voice was soft as he sat beside you, a strong hand coming to rest on your knee - the heat immoderately rushing to your cheeks.
You’d had a massive crush on Lewis since the day you’d met - but he was levels and levels above you at Mercedes. You were but a simple social media admin, something he personally opted to not take part in very often so your paths didn’t cross often and when they did you found yourself feeling like a giggly teenager.
You could almost hear the cogs turning in his head as he studied you, a gentle sigh leaving his lips.
“…hey uh, feel free to report me to HR if this crosses some major boundary but I never really get to speak to you alone.” He was fully facing you now, his hand still pressed against your knee - thumb brushing across the black fabric of your work trousers. “You fancy getting dinner sometime or something? I’ve seen you around a lot and I just… I honestly can’t get you out of my head.”
“M-Me? Seriously?” You laughed, practically flooded with disbelief. “You’re Lewis Hamilton.”
He smirked. “Yeah, and you’re you… I’d really like to get to know you outside of this world, no Mercedes branding attached. I already like what I do know, I’d like to see more.”
Your eyes flickered across his face for a moment, trying to read him - and he seemed nothing but genuine. You gave him a cautious nod and his face lit up, leaning in to press a chaste kiss to your cheek.
“We’re going to have a blast, trust me.” His grin lit up the room.
Before you could speak again there was a frantic knock on the door. “We’re about to take the hinges off! Stand back please!”
“All clear.” Lewis called back, before giving your hand a squeeze. “Ready to get back out there?”
You looked down at your entwined hands and smiled softly. “As I’ll ever be.”
Charles
Their music was quiet now, just softly playing in the background as Kika giggled - her boyfriend twirling her into his arms, a loving smile on his face. When she had insisted on hosting his birthday party at your shared apartment, you forgot to consider who one of Pierre’s best friends was, a man you loathed. And now, as the night rolled on and all of the other guests had filtered out - it was just the four of you left and whilst Pierre and Kika were still enjoying their tipsy states, you and Charles were as stiff as boards, sat as far apart from each other as possible.
Your eyes followed Kika as she stepped away from Pierre, circling the coffee table to approach you, manicured hands landing on your shoulders as she looked into your eyes. “We’re going to bed… you gonna be alright?”
“Yeah, yeah.” You forced a smile, one she was too inebriated to decipher. “I’m not tired, I’ll tidy up a bit.”
“Oh ‘miga. Don’t stay up too late.” She pressed a sloppy kiss to your temple before leading Pierre away, practically purring.
You rolled your eyes, still not giving the man beside you any attention as you stood up - collecting some cups from the table but as he started clearing the coffee table beside you, you couldn’t help but frown.
“You can go home, Charles.” You grumbled. “You don’t live here, y’know. It’s my mess to clear up.”
“Did Pierre not tell you?” He patted the back of the sofa. “This bad boy is my bed tonight.”
“…he did not. Well, I don’t want to keep you up, so I’ll clean tomorrow or something.”
He practically snorted out a laugh. “I don’t want to sleep in this mess either so, let’s just make it quick yeah?”
The two of you moved around each other quietly - you’d met through your best friends and very quickly decided that you didn’t get on. He was pretty and he knew it - he always had some stunning girl draped over his arm; at first you were just annoyed, just as you got to know her, like her even, he’d bin her off for a new model. He just didn’t know the meaning of the word loyalty.
“You uh, still with… uh Colette was it?”
He shrugged nonchalantly. “She wanted something more serious, so no,”
Charles watched you roll your eyes as you shoved a paper cup into the bin bag in your hand.
“What’s it to you anyway? Jealous?” He smirked, throwing a balled up napkin in your direction.
“No. I just don’t understand why you hate commitment so much.” You scoffed. “You always find the loveliest girls and then-“
“I don’t hate commitment. I’ve just not found a girl who challenges me.” His voice was quieter with his admission. “They all will literally just agree with everything and anything I say just because they’re desperate to keep me happy… that’s just not… I don’t want that.”
The silence was heavy but you didn’t dare move, especially as he walked around the coffee table towards you - bin bags long forgotten as he gently took your biceps in his hands.
“I… I know you don’t like me… I don’t blame you.” He sighed softly, letting his hands slowly cascade down your arms until his hands finally found yours, his lips curving into a shy smile when you didn’t pull away. “But I like the way you call me out on my shit, and you make me want to be better.”
“Charles…” You felt breathless. “I don’t want to be the reason you treat women right, you should do that because it’s the right thing to do.”
“You’re right, you’re right.” A soft huff escaped him. “Can we at least maybe start over? Friends?”
Your eyes studied his face - almost as if you were seeing him for the very first time. The way his green eyes still seemed bright under the dim lights of the floor lamps, the way his lips were such a pretty shade of pink… shit.
“Depends… would friends do this?”
Charles stumbled back a little as you kissed him, hands quickly finding purchase on your hips. He groaned as you looped your arms around his neck, pulling him in closer.
Oh he was fucked.
Fernando
You don’t think you could be pressed any further against the side of the van if you tried - Fernando’s manspreading had made sure of that. The two of you had somehow ended up in the back together, the third seat home to camera equipment as per the team’s request. It was supposed to be a quick trip, 20 minutes tops, but the roads were completely gridlocked so you found yourself stuck in the Spaniard’s company for a lot longer than you’d planned.
“Oh my god, Fernando.” You hissed, yanking the hem of your jacket out from under his thigh as he shifted. “Do you want to take up any more of my seat?”
The corner of his mouth tugged up into a small smirk. “Sorry.”
You rolled your eyes. “No you’re not.”
“You’re right, I’m not.”
A soft huff left your lips, turning away from him to look out the window - noticing the view hadn’t shifted even a little since you last checked. You groaned. “Have we moved at all?”
“Sorry! It’s completely at a standstill, looks like it’s going to be a while!” The driver called back from the front, sending you an apologetic gaze through the rear view mirror.
Fernando couldn’t help but notice your demeanour shift, fully slumped in your seat at this point - a petulant frown on your face. He always thought you were pretty, but you seemed to have a vendetta against him since day one despite his best intentions. And after a while he just gave him, treating you with the same sass you threw at him.
“Do you want to lighten up a touch, cariño” He teased, leaning a little so he could catch your eye. “This car ride is already going to be bad enough without your attitude.”
You rolled your eyes. “You’re not exactly my favourite person to be around.”
“And why is that? Hmm?” His voice was patronising, condescending almost, and it made you want to smack him upside the head - but you’d definitely get fired. “Did I forget your birthday or something?”
He was surprised by the dejected sigh that left your lips, your eyes almost wet when you looked up at him. “…You’ve just always made me feel like a dumb kid. I know how to do my job. I’m smart, I’m capable. I’m not even that young! But god forbid I do anything myself. Let me move that for you. I’ve got that. Oh no, I’ll do it myself.”
“You think I did all that because I thought you were incapable?” He had to hold back the laugh of disbelief. “Cariño , that was just me being a gentleman… I was trying to be courteous, to impress you.”
Your cheeks heated. “Impress me?”
“Well, yeah.” This time he laughed softly. “You said it yourself, you’re smart, you’re capable… and, forgive me, you’re very beautiful. I never meant to cause upset or make you think I thought little of you.”
You felt beyond embarrassed - this whole time he was just being nice and you had automatically assumed he was looking down on you.
“…want to start over?” Your voice timid, unable to ignore the way your heart was pounding in your chest.
“I’d like that.” He held his hand out. “Hi, I’m Fernando.”
It was your turn to laugh as you took his hand in yours, his skin warm against yours as you gave it a firm shake - introducing yourself to him. His gaze was different as he looked at you now, his dark eyes no longer full of distaste but something new.
And you couldn’t wait to find out what it was.
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vixen-tech · 3 months ago
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Hi, hi, hii!! Here's a silly little idea I had: headcanons about the AIs developing feelings for someone. What do you think would initially make them feel attraction? Is there a particular trait that makes them-- metaphorically --fall head over heels? What makes them have the realization that their affections are suddenly less than platonic? How subtle or not subtle are they about their feelings? Would they be the type to immediately blurt out these new feelings, or are they the type to never address them?
You don't have to answer all of these questions; I just thought they'd be helpful. AaAA I love your writing so much, especially how you write for AM. Okay, I'll shut up nowwwww
Okay I'm absolutely gonna have to revist this some point down the line because there is so much I could stretch into a full headcanon post. But for now I'm gonna bite into first two questions: Why is it you they fall for? What caught their eye?
To be barred from AM's hatred, you're ultimately going to have to prove him wrong about humanity in some way. Setting yourself apart from the other human survivors and extending compassion to the mastercomputer himself. In particular I really like how rotten-raspberries's White Nights handles the entry point of your relationship and it's the model I like to hint at in my interpretation of him.
I believe Hal would be interested in a old soul type. Someone who would love to sit down and really explain their more philosophical views on life and art. He likes looking at the drawings the crew makes and was taught to sing early into his creation and I think he would find a deep appreciation for someone who indulges that side of him when the others do so on only the most surface level.
I could make the easy observation with Edgar and say he just wants someone like Madeline, but there's a reason it's so true. Being so new to the world he would find such passion and artistry amazing, astonishing. He loves so easily and is so energetic about life, he would easily be swept off his feet by a kindred spirit.
Tau would be very similar I imagine. Given the temperament of his creator he needs someone to kindly sit him down and give him the "welcome to personhood 101" speech. Compared to Edgar I think he'd prefer someone a bit gentler or even scholarly. The type who would not only be content to answer his billions of questions but someone so invested themselves in figuring out how the world works.
As a bit of a departure from what I tend to write, I believe P03 would be suited for more of a rivals with romantic tension type of partner. With his world domination plot and investment in the game of Inscryption it would be very possible for him to get in his head about someone as equally skilled and stuck up as he is. Loving the challenge but hating you at the same time in a "I'm the only one allowed to defeat you" type way.
The hardest to crack is probably Auto. In order for him to even look your way I think you'd have to at first play to his need for efficiency and order. It's only after you establish yourself as a dependable and effective worker that he would pay any mind to your insistence that surely there's something that he truly enjoys, something that he wants.
Glados is another hard one to win over. Being all "married to science" you would have to be of a particular intellectual caliber, able to solve her tests without much set back. Beyond that though, some amount of persistence or rebellion would catch her eye. Perhaps not on the level of Chell per say, but there is a part of her that would love to pick your brain if you're able to consistently break her test chambers.
Although it's a bit sad, Wheatley wants nothing more than to be important. He would probably be the easiest to woo just because he's so desperate to prove himself to anyone including himself. For someone to care about him, to think he is skilled in any way, to look at him as worthy- worthy of love and attention, would be a blissful and new experience. One that he'd quickly obsess over.
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melodic-haze · 5 months ago
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REQUEST: A reader much more powerful than Arlecchino and not doing anything about it.. except in bed.
☆ — DEMO TRACK: sub!Arlecchino x dom!Reader
☆ — TYPE: NSFW
☆ — CONTENT WARNINGS: Mention of bloodplay at the very end but like. Very minor. Otherwise there's nothing 🤷‍♀️
☆ — NOTES: I'M NEVER TOUCHING MY DRAFTS WHEN I JUST WOKE UP EVER AGAIN I'M SO SORRY 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭 this was kinda bad dawg am sorry 😞
☆ — PARTS: Part 1, Part 2 (you are here)
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Tall AND powerful??? Ohhhh she's gonna die you KNOW I had to mix it hahaahahha powertrip goes CRAAAAZYYYYYY I have such a thing for it I'm gonna cry
Anyway ok so I would like to first state that extremely powerful chrs that don't actually do a lot w their power is like one of my top fav tropes it's so fucking funny 😭 like dawg you have the power to change the world wdym you're just gonna sit here like it's summer vacation (there's a reason why my Akivilicarnation au exists (even though I gotta work on it one way or another))
This is rather different from the stuff I usually write bc I usually write the reader as. Kinda weak for the sake of putting us all on a powerscale between the chr and our average strength as a human being omg bare with
Okay so. I do feel like she'd be a tad bit frustrated with you, at least at first. Like you could do so much more than what you're showing and yet here you are, not using your strength for important stuff? Lazy bitch, her children are much better than your example 💀 at least, that's her initial take, really
But give her a demonstration, both in a time of need and yk ☺️☺️☺️, and she'll soften up
Anyways it's just the fact that you're both tall AND powerful??? Nevermind her doing anything, she'll find herself dazedly thinking of the ways in which you can quite possibly manhandle her with such brazen 'disrespect'......and also? In the ways you two can actually COMPETE. Or well, 'compete', esp when she finds herself actually WANTING to lose for once. Crazy, how the great Knave would actually prefer to lose compared to the usual want to win against her opponent
You sighed, "I know we talked about it two days ago but do we have to? Really?"
"I would like to test you. Unless you would rather skip such pleasantries?"
"I don't think fighting until one of us surrenders counts as 'pleasantries'. Quite the opposite, actually."
While you've always known Arlecchino to constantly have a stony expression that doesn't usually change, you see the bright crosses of her eyes dim just a fraction, "So I suppose that's a no, then?"
"Well, now," you stepped back with an amused look on your face, getting into the fighting stance you're familiar with, "I didn't say that... Especially not when the reward is something I really want."
And she gains that glow once again as she brandishes her weapon with a fraction of a smile and.. something else much more heated behind those eyes of hers, "Do not get ahead of yourself, my beloved. The results have yet to be concluded."
..She speaks as if she hadn't actually wanted to lose. Laughable, really.
(You know from the way that at the end of it all, she lies underneath you as her eyes scan you with that same heated look in her eyes—lust, a sin in which The Knave hadn't thought of ever committing.. until you came along.)
The whole thing about her being able to reverse your positions? THROW THAT TO THE FUCKING WIND IN THIS SITUATION you can easily EASILY fold her without a care in the world. The fact that she KNOWS you can too gives her a rush she hasn't ever felt without that extra layer of threatened rage
Push her up against the wall, hold her up in the air, pin her down so she can't squirm away..........if you're much more powerful than her, she actually makes a show of 'trying' to escape you. Keyword: 'trying', especially when at the end of the day she resigned herself to losing already
She tells you not to hold anything back, no matter how cautious you are. She says she can handle it, that she isn't strong without reason, that she can endure whatever you give her, no matter what. Usually she kinda ends up forgetting anything she's said though, especially when you're fucking her SOOO hard she starts seeing stars behind her eyes
If your strength applies to endurance too??? Ohhh bye she's not lasting. Like okay she definitely has stamina and endurance but against you? SHE'S QUITE LITERALLY DWARFED....BYE.........
In some way, she actually likes the fact that you don't show your power other than in private with just the two of you—it makes her feel special, to know exactly what you're capable of. Dare I even say she's a tad bit possessive over every side of you? Who can say 😜
Just think that whenever she kinda stands beside you in public w her heels on, she's very very VERY easily reminded of the fact that you tower over her in height, capability AND position.......and really, in comparison to what everyone else may think? Arlecchino wouldn't have it any other way 🫶
....oh side note, just think about how rough you can go, biting each other to the point where you draw blood. Sorry I had to get that final bit out ANYWAY
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estxkios · 5 months ago
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HEYYY OMG I LOVE UR WRITING WHAT??
ANWAYS, could you do something with drunk bill? not smut, but like bassicly reader picks him up from a party or something and he’s like SUPPERRDUPPERR drunk LOL. and later in the story he’s keeping reader awake by talking so much, and reader just exhausted and so tired of his shit and accidentally tells him to shut the fuck up or something like that. then billy willy starts crying bcs he’s drunk and can’t process and reader just comforts him.
TYSM!! xx
FEELINGS ੈ✩‧₊˚
2008 bill kaulitz x fem!reader
summary : the request :3
warnings: ANGST with comfort!!, reader is grumpy, drunk bill, a lot of swearing, bill gets comfort not the reader...
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;- 2:16 am
“what the fuck..?” you muttered under your breath.
your room was completely dark, your phone screen turning on as you received text after text was the only thing that illuminated it.
you tried to shift your position in bed, turning away from the phone. 
you tried to ignore the messages.
but they just kept coming to a point where you could no longer ignore the irritating rattle of your phone against your nightstand.
you let out a string of curse words as you shift in your bed once again.
you reach your arm out towards your nightstand and aimlessly grope for your phone until you find it.
you squint your eyes as they adjust to the brightness of your phone, finally seeing who has been disturbing your sleep.
it was your boyfriend.
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;- 2:24 am
you and bill had eachothers location, so finding him wasn’t going to be the hard part. 
the hard part was going to be trying not to fall asleep at the wheel as your drove to whatever house party bill was attending tonight.
well, trying to get your drunk boyfriend in the car would be hard too, but based on his texts, he would probably be too intoxicated to break free from your arms as you shoved him in the back seat like you have done previously.
-; 2:35 am
you could hear the faint sound of trashy music playing as you pulled into the driveway and right as you exited your car you bee-lined for the front door.
you pounded on the door loudly enough so that people would be able to hear it over the music. 
no answer.
“oh-! hiii baby!” a voice said behind you, to which you immediately whipped your head around.
“whatthefuck-“ you stopped when you realized who it was, “bill? why the fuck are you outside?” 
“i was jus’ waiting for youu!” he stumbled towards you and smiled.
you shook your head and laughed to yourself in disbelief. how much had he had to drink?
“yeah, okay.” you paused, “we’re going to my house. c’mon” 
you grabbed bills arm and led him to the passenger seat, he was trying to open the door while you rummaged around in your purse trying to find your keys, the darkness which surrounded the two of you definitely didn’t help this.
bill kept pulling the door handle.
“bill fucking stop you’re gonna rip the door handle off-..“ you found your keys and unlocked the door.
“m’sorry! i jus wanna-“ he tried to continue talking but you pushed him into his seat as fast as you could and shut the door.
you were so ready to get back in your bed as sleep. 
-; 2:40 am
on the drive back to your house, bill stayed mostly quiet.
“are you okay?” you asked him in a concerned tone, “because you’re usually a fucking obnoxious drunk-“
“im not drunk.!.” he looked at you with a very stern expression and you couldn’t help giggle.
“okay.”
-; 2:50 am
when you finally got back to your house you did the same as when you arrived at the frat house. 
you immediately bee-lined for the door.
except the difference was you now had a drunk bill following you.
once again fumbling with your keys, you unlocked the door, bill attached to your arm.
“go to the spare room bill, or take the couch, i don’t care.” you said as you hung your jacket and purse back in their designated areas.
“okayyy..” bill obliged, walking down the hallway towards the bedrooms.
you followed after him moments later, walking into your bedroom.
as you went to settle into your bed you saw something that certainly wasn’t one of the many blankets that littered your room.
“bill.”
“hm? oh hi y/n!” you could see his toothy smile at you even in the darkness. 
“bill, i said go to the spare room. i actually need to sleep tonight. please, baby.”
“but- but i don’t wanna be alone!” he cried, “i promise i will never ever do this again, please can i just stay in here?”
you thought about shoving him off of your bed and letting him find his way to the spare room, but then you thought about how hard it would be to get him off of the floor once you pushed him off the bed.
so you scratched that idea.
“fine..” you muttered, “but be quiet, okay? can you do that for me?” you kissed him lightly on his sweet alcohol-ridden lips.
he looked at you with drunken eyes and smiled. “okay..”  
you smiled at him through the darkness and planted a kiss on his forehead, then continuing to position yourself in a comfortable sleeping position. 
after moments of silence, you thought bill had fallen asleep.
but no.
you flinched as he started fidgeting with your hair, although soon after you leaned into the touch as he usually did this to help soothe himself to sleep
then you heard suppressed giggles behind you which soon turned into full-on laughs.
you tried to ignore him, thinking it would end soon.
but once again, no.
“bill, stop.”  you would whisper, but he couldn’t. 
he brought his hand up to cover his mouth. 
big mistake.
the hand he intended to cover his mouth with was the one he had tangled up in your hair, which led to him accidentally tugging on your hair as he brought it up to his mouth. 
“bill what the fuck!? - ow!” you whipped back at him, “that was my fucking hair!”
you rubbed the back of your head where bill had tugged to soothe the pain, muttering to yourself as you did so.
bill didn’t utter a word. 
you stared into his pitiful eyes and spat many insults at him before grabbing a stray pillow and smacking it between the two of you.
that had to keep him from disrupting your sleep, right?
not right.
the giggles that you heard behind your back minutes ago had now turned into small whimpers.
the bed shook behind you as bill whined out an unsteady breath.
he had to be messing with you.
you turned around for the final time, about to completely snap, “bill can you just fucking-“
you fell silent and stared into bills eyes which were somehow even more pitiful than before.
his makeup was not yet running down his face but it was smudged under his eyes, a streak of the black shadow ran up into his hairline where he had presumably wiped it.
bill sat up, but that didn’t keep him from breaking down. “i didn’t mean to pull your hair..!!” he hid his head in his hands, sobbing into them.
“oh bill…” you almost started crying seeing the state that he was in. how could you have made your own boyfriend feel like this?
you removed the pillow that you had put between the two of you, discarding it onto the floor as you practically scooped bill up in your arms.
you hugged him tightly as he sobbed into your shoulder.
“i- im so sorry!!” he whined out almost incomprehensibly. he was a drunk, sobbing mess.
“bill.. please don’t apologize..” you stroked the back of his head, gently combing through his rough black hair.
“do you still love me?” his manicured nails dug into your shoulders nervously as he waited for a response.
your heart sunk as his words. had you made him feel like you didn’t love him?
you moved your arms to wrap firmly around bills torso, pulling him flush against you.
you held him tightly, holding back tears of your own as you rested your chin on his head.
“bill..” you trailed off, moving your head away from his as you gently tried to get him to meet your gaze. “i love you so much.. i’m sorry for snapping. really. i’m so fucking sorry. i’m just so tired and-“ 
bill cut you off by smashing his head into your chest, “i really didnt mean to hurt you.. i was just trying to go to sleep..”
“i know you didn’t mean to hurt me bill.. its really okay.”
you felt bill nod into your chest, the poor boy was so tired and he was just trying to soothe himself to sleep.
god, why did you yell at him?
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oh i really hate this but enjoy nonetheless
212 notes · View notes
zombiigrll · 6 months ago
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FOREVER GRATEFUL FOR YOU. ⋆。°✩ carl grimes x reader .ᐟ WORD COUNT .ᐟ ⭑ 3.7K (JESUS.) ꩜ .ᐟ WARNINGS ⭑ angst + comfort (mostly angst), retelling of the walking dead 8x8 (so slight spoilers), use of y/n, reader death, blood, your regular zombie apocalypse warnings, cursing, kissing, mostly just sad stuff!! .ᐟ A/N .ᐟ i am SO SORRY for how INSANELY LONG this is. it took me like 3-4 hours to write oh my god. hope you guys enjoy anyhow though<3
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carl told you he was going on a run to find the man the two of you had spotted at the gas station. you begged to go, and eventually, he caved. the two of you had known each other since the start, being neighbors and all. you were in his house while you waited for lori to get ready to take the two of you to school, and thats when everything went down. with all of the things he saw you do, he knew you could take care of yourself.
...or he thought you could.
the two of you were lucky enough to find the man from the gas station and you found out his name was siddiq.
"i'm gonna ask you a few questions. i need you to answer honestly, okay?" carl told siddiq.
"..okay." siddiq nodded.
"how many walkers have you killed?" siddiq looks around, thinking. "i know it's hard to keep track-"
"237."
"really?" you raised an eyebrow, impressed, but skeptical.
"give or take a couple." siddiq shrugged.
carl nodded in response before continuing. "how many people have you killed?"
"one." the man averted his gaze to the ground.
"why?"
"the dead tried to kill him, but... they didn't." he explained, looking back up at the two of you.
"you've been making walker traps? is that how you've been killing all of them?" you asked, crossing your arms as you looked at the scenery of traps and the deceased walkers behind him.
"it's only part of it. my mom thought- or hoped- that killing them would free their souls. you know?" he clarified, seemingly upset but proud talking about his mother.
"doing that, doesn't that just make things harder for you while you're trying to survive?" carl inquired, furrowing his brows.
"i don't know.. i.. but you.. you gotta honor your parents, right?"
...
the three of you had been walking for a little while before you guys came across a couple walkers in the distance, crouching down near a tree.
"okay. for your mom." carl smiles and siddiq before facing you, signaling for you to join.
you grabbed your knife that was holstered across your waist, stepping forward alongside siddiq and carl. but shortly after, there was too many. at first it only seemed like a couple, enough for just the three of you to take care of quickly. but they began coming in from other sides of the forest, and you were cornered. you were stepping back to try and get more distance, but you twisted your ankle on a tree root, causing you to topple on top of the tree laying on the ground. the walkers began limping towards you as you looked frantically around for where your knife had went. but you were too late. two of the walkers were down on the ground, one on top of you and the other on your side. you tried your best to push the one over you with one of your hands while searching the ground for your knife with the other one.
*chomp!*
a pain rushed through your side, but you didn't think much of at that point due to feeling the handle of your knife, quickly picking it up and jamming it through the skull of the walker on your side, then into the one in front of you, pushing it off of you.
right as you did so, you were met with carl staring at you wide-eyed.
"oh my god, you're covered in blood." he ran over to you, crouching down next to you and grabbing your hand. "are- are you bit?"
he helped you up and you stared at the ground, then at your bloodied clothes. "...no. i'm okay."
you weren't okay. you knew what had happened to you, but.. you couldn't tell him. not now. you were lucky enough that your shirt had fallen over the bite when you stood up.
"are you sure? you don't feel anything at all?" he repeated his question, his hands on top of your shoulders while he looked at you with concern.
"i'm sure." you nodded, wiping your hands on your legs. "we should.. we should head back now."
carl sighs. "...okay."
you felt like shit.
...
the entire walk back, carl was extremely cautious of any walkers, hoping there wouldn't be another close call on the way.
"...i love you, carl. don't ever forget that." you said, you voice low and slightly shaken.
"i love you, too. are you okay?" he was surprised at your sudden comment, which proved to have made him a bit anxious.
"yeah, yeah. i just wanted to say i love you." you smiled quickly at him before looking back down at your feet as you continued walking. you could feel your ankle that you twisted earlier was pulsating, and you could feel the bite beginning to eat away at your body, but you tried your best to keep your composure. you wanted your final day with carl to be normal.
...
you guys got arrived at alexandria and you walked into the bathroom, closing and locking the door behind you. you stared at yourself in the mirror, taking in everything that had just happened. you removed your jacket and lifted up your shirt to reveal the bite, which was still leaking with blood. you couldn't take your eyes off of it. you shook your head while tears began falling from your eyes, processing this whole situation.
"fuck." you let out a breathy laugh before taking your shirt completely off.
you grabbed some of the medical supplies from behind the mirror and put it over the bite so it wouldn't bleed through new clothes. you grabbed a clean shirt from the laundry basket behind you and put it on.
you wiped the tears from your eyes, cleaning up your appearance a bit more before exiting the bathroom.
"there you are. how're you doing?" carl sat up from the couch and walked over to you.
"oh, i'm doing fine." you smiled up at him, interlocking his hands with yours. "hey, do you know where that camera is?"
"camera?" his eyebrow raised as he tilted his head with curiosity.
"yeah, remember? the camera? i used to always use it to take photos of you and judith." you reminded him with a laugh.
"oh, the camera!" he joined the laugh. "it's in my room, i'll go get it." he began walking in the direction of his room swiftly, coming back with the camera in hand shortly after.
"thank you." you took the camera from his hands, quickly pointing it up and taking a photo of him.
"ah, hey!" he chuckled, covering part of his face.
you grabbed the photo from the camera before pulling him into a tight hug.
"hey.. wheres judith?" you inquired, your head buried in his neck.
"she's up in her room, why?"
"we should hangout with her." you broke from the hug with a smile, putting the camera into your bag before heading into the direction of her room, carl following shortly behind you.
you walked into her room and picked her up from her crib. "hey, jude." you spoke in a soft voice, holding her gently in your arms. carl smiled at your actions. he's always had a soft spot for you and judith.
you began walking outside with judith in your arms and carl following by your side. you sit down on the steps of the porch, setting judith down in between you and carl. you dig into your bag and pull the camera out again, holding it up and taking a picture of the three of you.
you take the photo from the camera, moving it down to judith so she can see. as carl looked down at the photo that was forming, he notices how shaky your hands are.
"hey, your hands are shaking.." he points out, putting his hand over yours.
"oh, hah.. i'm okay. i don't know why i'm shaking so bad." you shrugged it off nervously, setting the photo in your bag along with the camera.
"..okay." carl nervously responded, nodding his head slowly.
"hey, carl?"
"hm?"
"do you remember before all of this when you came over to help decorate my room and my mom let us dip our hands in paint and put it above my bed?" you reminisced on the moment.
"oh, yeah, i remember!" carls nervous expression turned into a smile. "i remember asking my mom when i got home if she would let me do that. we never got the chance to."
"...why don't we do it now?" you asked, smiling back at him.
"do we have paint?"
you looked around and spotted some blue paint on the side of the porch. "there!" you pointed to it before grabbing it, setting it right next to you. "we could put the handprints right here on the porch."
you dipped the palm of your hand in the paint, setting it down on the porch. carl did the same after, except on the opposite hand of yours.
"hey, isn't blue your favorite color?" you asked carl, noticing him getting more excited about the paint after you found the blue paint.
he nodded, lifting his now blue paint-stained hand off of the porch.
the two of you faced judith, then each other. you carefully grabbed both of judiths hands and dipped her palms in the paint, setting them to the side of yours and carls prints.
the three of you giggled happily, smiling at each other.
"now this porch is ours." you proudly stated, glancing at the handprints drying into the porch. "let's go get our hands washed."
you carefully picked judith up with your non-paint stained hand and brought her to the bathroom to wash her hands.
...
it was the next day. it felt fairly peaceful- well, besides your body weakening. you knew that you were getting closer to your limit. carl was in the other room resting. you found a pile of envelopes and paper, and proceeded to write. your first note, of course, was to carl. after that, you wrote to michonne, rick, daryl, maggie, then judith. sure, she couldn't read, but for when she's older. you had also found some jewelry beads and string. when you and carl were younger, the two of you had friendship bracelets. his was blue, which had always been his favorite color, and yours was purple. you decided to recreate it for him to remember you by.
once you were finished, you put them on your wrists, covering them with your sleeves.
...
it was now night, and negan had came to alexandria. a feedback was played on the intercom before negan spoke into it. we was speaking about apologies, and whoever gave the lamest one would be killed. you all were given three minutes to open the gate for them. you felt your fever begin coming in, your body temperature quickly rising.
"come on." carl whispered, nudging you in the shoulder to snap you out of your daze, doing the same with michonne. "y/n, michonne! come on!"
"you guys go. i'll deal with them, okay?" you told him, to which he instantly shook his head disapproving.
"no, you're coming with. it's not something we're discussing-"
"go." your voice turned stern. "i'll be fine. they won't get me. i'll distract them and give you more time to get everyone to the sewer. then come back to the watchtower."
carl looked like he was about to say something, but you cut him off with a kiss. as you pulled away, you smiled at him reassuringly. "trust me."
carl furrowed his brows before looking up at you and nodding, nudging michonne to lead her away.
you began walking up the ladder to the watch tower, hearing negan give final warnings to rick despite him not being there.
you stood up on the watch tower. "rick isn't here."
"oh, shit!" negan said in his annoyingly enthusiastic tone. "everyone, everyone, hold your fire... it's y/n. look at you. answering the door just for him. sucks that he's gonna come home to a big smoky surprise."
"there's families in there. theres kids, carls baby sister." you crossed your arms, looking down at him.
"well, that shit just breaks my heart." negan said pathetically. "there's kids at the sanctuary. even had a baby at one of the outposts. i wonder what happened to her."
you stayed silent, angrily glaring at him.
"none of this shit's fair, kid. carl knows that."
"don't." your voice turned stern.
"he had to kill his own mom. that is screwed up." negan bringing up lori and her death filled you with rage. god, you wanted to get rid of negan right then and there. but you were smarter than that.
you took a deep breath. "bad stuff happens, but we can figure this out. we... we can stop this."
"rick had it that i died, no matter what." he reminded angrily. "he gave my people a choice, not me. now we're gonna need a new understanding. apologies, punish-"
"kill me."
"...what?"
"if you have to kill anybody, if there has to be a punishment, kill me. just me. serious."
"you want to die, girl?" he scoffed, raising an eyebrow at you.
"no... no, i don't. but i'll die if it means everyone here lives." you averted your eyes, looking down and noticing carl standing by the ladder waiting for you. "if.. if all of this ends, or makes things different because i die? it'll be worth it. i mean, was this your plan? is this really who you wanted to be?"
negan looks away, which gives you an opportunity to get down the watchtower and back to carl. you try and get down the ladder as quick as possible, but you trip at the last step.
luckily, carl was there to catch you. "shit, you're sweating bullets. are you okay-"
"nevermind that, we have to go!"
you and carl ran around alexandria, throwing the smoke bombs around as negan and the saviors begin launching their grenades into the homes.
as you guys are running around, you begin getting dizzy and your body heat is increasing.
you walk up onto the porch of one of the houses, laying the back of your head on the front door as you catch your breath. you wipe the sweat off of your head, breathing heavily.
carl walks up to you, throwing a smoke bomb behind him. "what's the matter with you?"
you shook your head. "nothing, nothing. i'm fine. just.."
you and carl come to a halt at the sound of a bomb hissing behind you. you turn around to face the house and just before the bomb blows, carl grabs you by your hand and tugs you towards him, stepping back away from the house.
as your body presses up against him, he notices your body temperature at a high. "jesus, you're burning up. here, the sewer is right here."
he lifts up the sewer cover and begins crawling down, signaling for you to follow after him. you walk over and step onto the ladder, pulling the sewer cover back over to cover you guys.
as you get to the bottom, you turn around and see everyone, safe. you start breaking down, covering your mouth as you sob.
“y/n? whats wrong? its done, were safe, everyone is safe.” carl says with confusion and panic in his tone as you stay silent. "...please, say something. you're scaring me."
“…im sorry carl. im so sorry.” carl raises an eyebrow.
you lift up the side of your shirt, revealing your bite to everyone.
carl stares at you, his eye becoming glossy and his brows furrowing together as his breaths deepen. he shakes his head. “no.. stop.” he turns around with his hands behind his head, shaking.
“it happened when i was trampled by the walkers.” you admitted.
“why… why didnt you tell me then..? you told me you were fine!” his voice was wobbly as he tried calming down.
“because i didnt want my last day to be spent with you worrying. i wanted your genuine happiness, not you masking your emotions because you knew it would be the… the final time.” your voice cracked as you spoke.
carl stayed silent, understanding, but still denying the whole situation. “i cant- no-“ he began to cry, running up to you and hugging you tightly. one of his hands laid behind your head and the other along your waist. “you can’t leave me. not- not like this, please.”
“i’m sorry. you’re gonna be okay, carl. you… you’re strong. stronger than anyone i’ve ever met before.”
you broke from the hug and began taking the bracelet off of your wrist, handing it to him. “here, take it.” carl wiped away the tears flowing from his eye before reaching his shaking hand out to the bracelet, taking it from your hands and putting it over his wrist.
"it's.. blue." he remembered the conversation you two had the previous day about his favorite color.
"yep. just for you." you chuckled, rolling your sleeve down and holding up your wrist to reveal the bracelet you made to match his. "we always wanted matching friendship bracelets, remember?"
you moved your hands up to the sides of his face, smiling widely at him with tears in your eyes. “you’re gonna be okay…you’re gonna be okay.”
before carl could say anything, you let out a loud wince as a pain shot through your side. carl quickly grabs you, stabilizing you.
"do.." he sniffles. "do you need to sit down?"
you nodded and carl helped you down on the ground. he held your hand tightly, pulling it up to his face.
"i can't..." he cried.
"i know, i know." you brought up your free hand to move his hair out of his face, moving his head to face you. "you're so sweet. i'm so.. so glad that i got to spend my whole life with you. i'm sorry you couldn't spend yours with me."
he shook his head in shock. the sewer cover opened, and rick and michonne stepped down, noticing carl resting his head on your hand and your beaten up and dying frame sitting on the ground.
"y/n?" michonne called out, her eyes widening at the sight of you.
you glanced over to her with a saddened smile. you brought your free hand to lift up your shirt again to re-reveal your infecting bite. rick walked over and put a hand on his sons back, staring at you somberly.
"...i got bit." you sighed, a tear falling from your eye. "me and carl, we were bringing someone back. his name is siddiq. he was the guy you saw at the gas station before."
rick shakes his head, covering his mouth. michonne steps closer to you with tears in her eyes. she had always been such a supportive person for you and carl, especially since lori had passed. "it wasn't the saviors, it wasn't anyone. i just.. i got bit."
...
"the saviors are gone. we can get everyone to the hilltop. we can get y/n to the hilltop!" carl argued, squeezing your hand tightly.
rick sighs. "she wont-"
"daryl can get one of the cars."
"y/n can't leave here." rick sternly says. "she doesn't have enough time."
"...i have to stay with her." carl shakes his head, looking down at you.
"carl.."
"if she can't go, then i'm staying with her." he repeats, a tear falling from his eye.
"..can you take judith?" rick asks daryl.
daryl nods, picking her up. "yeah. i'll get her there. i'll keep her safe."
"let me say goodbye." you weakly ask.
daryl sets her down near you, and she begins walking towards you.
you weakly smile at judith. "i already know you're gonna be incredible. you entered this world at a bad time, but that will only make you stronger. you're gonna grow up, make friends, find someone you love.. you'll live." you look down at the ground with a smile. "just like your mom said to carl, you're gonna beat this world. you and him."
judith begins whining, and thats when daryl picks her up again.
"goodbye, judith." you waved. "goodbye, daryl."
after stating your goodbyes to a couple people, you felt yourself beginning your end.
"i don't.. i don't know how much longer i have left." you held carls hand tighter. "i don't want to die in here."
"here." carl wraps your arm around his neck.
...
carl and rick helped you to the house across the way, setting you down carefully inside.
"th-thank you." you coughed. "i.. i have one more thing for you, carl."
"what? what is it?" he kneeled down next to you.
"it hurts to move, it's in my front pocket. please grab it."
he reaches in hand into your pocket and pulls out the envelop. "this?"
you nod. "open it."
he opens the envelop and reads whats inside.
'carl, you have always been there for me, ever since the beginning. after losing my family, you helped me. you, rick, and lori all helped me. i never thought that it would end this way, and i'm sorry i put you through this pain. i'm glad i met you. i'm glad you ended up being the one. i wouldn't have traded you for anyone else. thank you, and i love you. through life and death. - y/n.'
tears began flowing out of his eye yet again. he brought up a hand to cover his mouth.
"we grew up too fast. but we grew up together. i'm forever grateful for you, carl grimes." you laughed, holding his hand. "i love you."
"i- i love you, too." his voice cracked. "everything i did was for you, y/n. every single thing."
"that doesn't have to change. you have to be there for judith now, too. she needs her brother." you moved your hand up to his face. you felt your fever start to set in, and your brain felt like it was shaking alongside the rest of your body. "...it's time, carl."
"do you want me to.. to do it?" he put his hand to the gun that was holstered on his side.
"i can't do it myself. i can't move." you cried with a smile still laying across your face. "i'm sorry."
"it's okay." he took out his gun and moved his free hand to the side of your face.
"can i have one last kiss?" you chuckled. he nodded and leaned in, kissing you. you closed your eyes and felt the metal go to the side of your head.
and then all the pain went away.
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218 notes · View notes
doublel27 · 6 months ago
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We Are: Queer Found Family and Romance
Or the meta I didn’t intend to write.
It’s taken 9 eps (of me admittedly watching We Are through gifs and clips on Twitter, because I have yet to pay for iQIYI and I am bad at grey watching) but I think I have figured out the central conflict/plot of We Are and why the mostly linear narrative of Phum and Peem with the in media res relationships of our other three pairings made this impossible to fully tease out until we got all the pieces.
The through line that connects all of these stories about how incredibly hard it can be to be part of a queer friend group when the lines of friendship and romance blur, especially when there’s a real aspect of found family to that group.
Two things really cemented it for me this week: Tan telling the gang (and therefore the audience) the full scope of his background with Fang, as well as the beginning of Phuwin’s IG live where he talks about why he likes Kluen as a character is that he’s very direct with people he likes and isn’t blurring the lines between friends and possibly fucking up the friendship.
Because that’s the central problem that all four main couples of the show grapple with in different ways. I’m gonna get into all of that under the cut.
I’m going to start with Tan and Fang because aou contains multitudes and is my beloved while going for Fang could have always messed up his relationship with Phum, we find out in episode 9 that Tan met Fang first. Unsurprisingly, it’s not a great first meeting between what are seemingly two known fighters of what appear to be rival high schools. But then Tan finds Phum and Fang being jumped by a group from his own high school and saves them and eventually becomes friends with them sometime two years+ before the start of our story. Within this time, Tan falls so far in love with Fang, who can both out bitch and out fight, him that Tan goes full simp instead and cuts out the fighting(love that for him).
And mixing his reveal to his friends of how he met Fang and how Fang eventually consumed his waking thoughts to the point he would wish to order Fang as a pizza topping (my love for Tan is immeasurable).
But take us back to episode 2 (which is now on YouTube for US watchers for how long I don’t know) and Tan has clearly not seen Fang in awhile. He asks Phum to invite Fang out where Tan will happen to be. At the time, it was taken as Tan and Phum are university friends and Tan and been obsessed with Fang ever since and needs Phum to make the connections. But the clues that Tan and Fang were also close were already laid down. Their exchange goes:
Tan: Hey. It’s been awhile. Right?
Fang: I thought you were dead.
Tan: Come on. I haven’t seen you in ages either. (That’s the English translation, but the flow of the conversation connotes that Fang hasn’t sought him out either)
At which point Phum makes the face he always makes when Tan is in Fang hyperfocus mode of looking away and sighing. And Fang pointedly asks why Phum invited him out and what is going on.
Which is a weird exchange when you think Tan is Phum’s friend who is obsessed with Fang. It is a less weird exchange between friends that have been avoiding each other for an unspecified amount of time. And we can assume Tan started avoiding Fang because he was madly in love with him and didn’t know how to handle it and didn’t tell Fang why he was avoiding him.
In the episode 9 speech to his friends, Tan outlines that he didn’t think Fang would ever reciprocate his feelings (that it was impossible) and didn’t want to fuck with the friendship (at which point Pun sends a longing look to Chain but we’ll get back to that later) with Fang and Phum and he buried it. Until he couldn’t live with it any longer and decided to do something about it.
Which with the limited information we have, his feelings were already fucking with his friendship. He already didn’t know how to approach Fang because of his feelings at the start of the show, so is it better to not try and hope the romantic feeling dies while avoiding your friend or shoot your shot and maybe get a boyfriend out of it or maybe continue to fuck up your friendship. Tan chooses to roll the dice and it’s clear from the moment they leave the bar in episode two that Fang likes him back.
They both watch each other when they think the other isn’t looking. Fang is the one who sends Phum and Peem home together and sets himself up with a taxi ride with Tan. It’s particularly interesting to me after episode 9, this exchange, because Fang looks at a passed out Peem, mouths Peem? And proceeds to ask Phum if this is the guy that hit him while Tan snickers and Peem looks like the saddest wet cat. It’s only after the affirmative from Phum that Fang is essentially like “well, you can take him home Phum. Take home your drunk friend who hit you and I will go home with Tan.” Which our besotted Tan jumps at.
And considering the parallel between Tan and Fang meeting and Tan immediately sassing him and Fang throwing a punch leading to a fight, and Phum ruining Peem’s painting which led to mutual sassing and a kick to the nuts and a fight…I don’t know if Fang is a mastermind and connected the dots because these brothers need someone who will occasionally not be afraid talk back if need be and sees the potential for Phum to care as much about Peem as Fang does for Tan. Or if he just wants time alone with Tan and doesn’t see it. Look, I wouldn’t be surprised if Fang is secretly a long game mastermind.
Once they’re alone, Tan and Fang steal glances and flirt in the way that Tan makes very loud attempts at flirting and
Additionally, Fang is reserved like Phum, and seemingly as isolated as his only friends seem to be Phum’s friends. We don’t know if he is just not paying attention to other members of the architecture faculty or knows stuff about Kluen he won’t share. As previous parts of this narrative are folded in later episodes, we may find out. What we do know is he’s either ever only appeared alone or in connection to Tan and Phum and Phum’s friends. Even with the flashbacks, Tan points out that the head of the Fang, head of cheer club, approaches him alone and later it’s just Fang and Phum when Tan finds the group of guys jumping them. We know he and Phum adopt Toey who is bullied in high school. It makes sense why he’s potentially reserved about pushing things with Tan if Tan becomes his first real high school+ friend that he has outside of his brother.
Which is why by the time we get to episode 5, Fang says yes before Tan finishes talking. He’s been waiting but also wasn’t willing to be the first to put himself out there. And considering how much Fang and Phum seem to live in their heads and not in the world with everyone else, I can see why he needed Tan to be the one to commit to it first, especially with Fang’s later comments about not understanding why hanging out with him is a preference of Tan’s. I do hope we cross his “don’t tell tan how gone I am on him” bridge later in the narrative. Cause I think Tan knows, but also it’s nice to hear.
Let’s go back to another long-suffering pair where only one half really knew why they were suffering, and the other got a nasty shock, QToey.
I know the guys are all team if Toey loves Q and Q loves Toey then why is Q so hesitant? And I get it, but let’s talk about the double shock Q suffered and the potential layers of risk Q is facing.
It’s not just that Q is cautious with his heart. That is a factual truth. It’s why he ghosted Milk Frappe Boy, because while he fell in love with Milk Frappe Boy I think there was a deep worry, and a self esteem issue that the reality of Q, instead of Pencil Senior, would not be enough for Milk Frappe boy. So Q bolted and then deeply regretted said bolting enough say so to both Toey, not knowing the truth, and to Peem.
But the fact that he learned that Toey was indeed Milk Frappe boy at the same time he learned all of his best friends, his family for all intents and purposes, also knew and no one told him. And the way the confrontation is staged between Q and Toey, it is Q against Toey and everyone else is behind Toey.
And that, friends, that’s the real third rail for Q.
It’s one thing to know that he loved Milk Frappe Boy and that he loves Toey. And that is scary enough. The fandom loves to joke about how Toey is everyone’s little brother and they’ve all adopted him: and that is a correct assessment. But that means if Q fucks it up with Toey, he stands a chance in his mind of everyone else choosing Toey over him.
That fear doesn’t even feel that unfounded when everyone calmed Toey down mostly before Peem, Q’s true bestest friend, came out to be with him. Like Peem caught Toey before going after Q. The next episode nearly every character but Q (aside from Fai who is at all connected to this group) shows up to plan how to support Toey in getting Q.
And while I know my brain cell-less brain trust fully believe they’re helping Q, no one actually seems to ask what Q wants. Aside from Peem trying to get him to come to some that first night on the curb, no one ever asks. And that night all Q wants is to sleep in a pile with his four best friends, because that’s his family. Losing them is even scarier than losing Toey. In essence he’s lost Milk Frappe Boy once. He could do it again. But if they chose Toey…IDK.
We don’t know anything about their families really, aside from Peem’s lovely aunt and the fact that Phum doesn’t get along with his dad. And I get why when the focus is really on these large groups of found families (that are becoming one large found family) that the audience is really in love with. The bonds between the friends are just as much a part of the romance as the actual romances. Because the friendship is where the complications come from.
And while I can’t speak to mlm spaces, as I have never identified as a man, within queer wlw and non-binary spaces there are jokes about dating yourself out of friend groups. There are people you used to know who you don’t anymore because you dated someone in the friend group and were too new and got bounced. Or you date and the way it ends make everyone choose one side. Or, a person in the friend group has a crush on another person in said group, that is an open secret but when the person who was crushed upon gets a new relationship people get mad at them for not dating the person in the friend group who liked them all along because didn’t everyone know. (None of these are from personal experience I assure you 🙃)
And it doesn’t always happen like that. Sometimes the people figure out a friendship or a queer platonic solution when they’re not attracted to each other anymore. Sometimes they orbit around the friend group like two comets on opposite trajectories, occasionally crossing in awkward moments. Sometimes everyone gets past the weird. Sometimes no one does.
But that’s the risk that we’re playing in this show. I can choose the romance, but if it doesn’t work out, I am gambling this safe zone.
Which is gonna bring me to our last two pieces of this: one has had the most development and one the least but both are struggling.
I’m gonna start with Chain and Pun who are the most unhinged, gay yearning codependent besties that exist in the middle of the week and give Potae and Payos on Only Boo a real run for their money. (Both have lips touching earlobes and I don’t have a platonic answer for either) The thing is, I think both Chain and Pun are very aware of the mutual feelings. They both have moments where you know they’re aware but neither will do anything about it. And they are in the case of the story, the most embedded in one single friend group, and have the potential to explode their core group of five if things go sideways.
Now, they’re also the pair that has been effectively dating this entire time without actually dating. The ear biting and the blowing on things in the other’s mouth and the…I don’t have platonic explanations for their behavior okay? I don’t. Not naming it keeps it from being real though. It’s a collective hallucination or the biggest game of chicken.
Eventually, though, one of them is going to cross the line in a way that can’t be erased or the line redrawn. And it’s gonna have to be big because their friends watched them gaze longingly into each other's eyes for 20+ seconds and thought it was normal. Because this is how they are.
And that brings us to not quite friends not quite lovers and not quite enemies, Phum and Peem. The risk is, as discussed in many other metas, mostly on Phum’s side here and it’s why he spent the episode so hesitant. Yes he started off particularly entitled and rude. His and Peem’s relationship started as a fight (but so did Tan and Fang) and Phum feels incredibly comfortable with Peem. He’s definitely neurodivergent coded my Phum, which doesn’t make his assholery okay, but it explains his hesitancy to try new things and his struggle with making friends and expressing his feelings.
He’s got friends but he doesn’t feel particularly deeply connected to them. Yes, Beer makes time for him and actively seeks him out to give advice. He and Fang have a level of sibling codependency that hints at neglect and Fang protecting Phum at all costs. We see Tan approach Phum most of the time and while some of that is angling to get to Fang, Tan does genuinely care. But Tan is also incredibly loud which seems to be a lot for our neurospicy Phum, and Tan also has his large found family with Peem. Same with Toey, who Phum and Fang adopted long ago, and clearly Phum adores him, but he’s also the little brother of the art faculty.
And Peem is a very loving and giving soul and he makes time and space for Phum even though he’s annoying and high handed and gets Phum out of his ruts and comfort zones. And Phum clearly wants Peem to choose him, because Phum has already chosen even if he hasn’t said “I like you and want to date you.” He’s said other very direct things about how safe he feels with Peem and how connected he feels to other people by hanging out with Peem. And Peem is this safe space for him to go out and connect with the world without it being overwhelming and he even feels more connected to his own friends.
And that’s the danger that Kluen represents and what Phum struggles with. He wants Peem to choose him, but he also doesn’t want to force Peem to make a choice and not choose him, and then lose out on the experiences he’s building with Peem as well as a break in some of the connections he has with the people closest to him as Fang and Toey find love within Peem’s group. And so again, the question comes around, is it better to stay in this limbo where no one says anything and maybe Peem dates Kluen but I get to keep him as a friend, or do I roll the dice like Tan and maybe win.
I think it’s been a hard thread to pull because without the context of Tan & Fang meeting first, and Phum and Peem mending their relationship to become something akin to friends who kiss sometimes and don’t talk about it, and the lingering feelings of betrayal for Q by his friends (where they learned about his largest secret/mystery and NO ONE TOLD HIM) which are later revelations in the course of the show, they feel like different types of love stories without the mess of friendship blurring the lines. The story feels linear, because we start in a school year with the meeting of Phum and Peem, the connections between the other characters are older than this year, leaving some of their stories in media res.
And it’s an interesting core struggle taking a risk when the line between who you’re friends with, who you depend on, and who you’re attracted to blurs and the potential for rifts in your safety net are everywhere. It’s not the first show with this as a central tangle nor is it specific to queer television. But the reality of the deep ties that can exist within queer friendships and how they form deep supportive communities makes the stakes higher. And that’s why the friendships are developed nearly as much if not more than some of the romances. That’s where a lot of the risk lies for these characters.
Anyway, that’s nearly 3K of thoughts I didn’t know I had in me about We Are until today. But here we are.
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querenciasturniolo · 1 year ago
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i absolutely love your writing! could you maybe write something like nick and y/n is best friends and play argue/ fight all the time but y/n accidentally admits her feelings about matt and nick goes ballistic?
obviously ⮕ n.s.
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word count: 1k
warnings: swearing, accidental confession, shame, embarrassment
summary: one slip of the tongue has you at a complete loss of words
a/n: thank you so much 🫶🏻 this is such a funny concept, and it was so fun writing it.
everything written is completely fictional. the people i write for are written with characteristics and mannerisms that i made for them, this is in no way depicting what would actually happen in real life.
part one || part two
Nick never kept anything he was feeling to himself.
It was one of his many charms, constantly saying how he felt. You loved it, considering he was your best friend. You were never bored when Nick was on one of his rants. Right now was one of those moments, the two of you were laying in his bed, your stomach aching with how hard you were laughing.
“No, I’m serious! This old ass man was walking so fucking slow in front of me, and then pushed the pull door. He deserved it though, he wouldn’t let me pass.” He said. You shook your head and ran your hands through your hair.
“You always get yourself in the worst situations, I swear.” You said, another smaller laugh bubbling out of you as you sat up.
Nick pushed himself up and pulled his phone out. “Okay, topic change. Why are you posting all of these mushy, agonizingly painful text quotes about love on threads all of a sudden?” He asked. You turned to face him with your eyebrows raised.
“What are you talking about?”
Nick scoffed and tapped away on his phone, pulling up your threads profile and reading one of your posts out loud. “The only love that lasts is unrequited love.” He quotes dramatically, putting his whole soul into the theatrics. “I am in love with you, and I can’t do anything about it.” He finished. Your face was burning as you shook your head and shrugged.
“I don’t know, I thought they were beautiful.” You said, the look on Nick’s face completely unamused.
“Just tell me, Y/n. I’m not gonna judge you.” He said. He stood from his bed then, the expression on his face goofy. “Is it me? Are you in love with me? I wouldn’t blame you, I’m great.” You threw your head back and laughed, meeting Nick’s smiling face once more as you shook your head.
“Please, I’m not that delusional.” You said, reaching down and sliding your shoes onto your feet. “There’s no point in me saying it, because it would never happen anyway.”
Nick’s hand rested on your shoulder, your gaze meeting his. He was frowning, and you couldn’t help but scoff at him. “Okay, now I’m convinced that it’s me.” He said, a goofy smile on his face.
You snorted and shook your head before reaching for the door handle. “Nope.” You said, Nick raising his eyebrows.
“Chris, then? You guys have been hanging out a lot.” You scoffed and pulled a face, making it seem like you found it ridiculous.
“Wrong brother, but nice try.” You said, your hand freezing before you turned the knob. You could feel the gears turning in his head as he processed your slip up.
“Oh my God, it’s Matt, isn’t it?”
You turned your head to face him, more than likely resembling a deer in headlights as you met his eyes. His eyes were wide as realization dawned on him.
“Holy shit, I knew it!” He shouted. You shushed him, holding your hands up. Nick shook his head and stepped past you, slowly turning the door handle.
“Nicolas Antonio, I swear to God.” You said through your teeth, trying to avoid laughing as he ripped open the door and bolted down the stairs. You chased after him, shouting obscenities the moment you had him cornered. He was on the other side of the dining table, his smile playful as he moved from side to side, trying to catch you off guard. You were one step ahead of him, laughter trying its hardest to break through your lips as you beamed at Nick, shaking your head with each movement he made.
“I will smite you, I can promise you that.” You said, the both of you moving to the left quickly, completely switching sides of the table. Your back was to the sink, his to the stairs and both of your hands resting on the back of a chair.
Nick laughed quietly and shook his head. “I’m not going to tell Matt you like him, obviously. That’s just fucked up.” He said. You opened your mouth to respond, but before you could, you noticed the movement out of the corner of your eye.
It took you too long to process that Matt was standing next to the fridge, his eyes wide and his mouth agape. You felt all of the color drain out of your face, shame and embarrassment creeping in as your eyes flickered between Nick and Matt. Nick finally turned around, his eyes widening when seeing Matt standing there.
Before anyone could say anything, you rushed around the table and down the stairs, rushing out of the house and to your car.
The entire drive home, you were ignoring your phone vibrating, wanting to let yourself calm down and get home before you even looked. It took you getting to your room and sitting on your bed before you even pulled your phone out to see.
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You sighed and messaged Nick back, letting him know you weren’t mad at him and that you just needed some time to yourself to process everything.
You were mortified, to say the least. It felt childish to be embarrassed about having your feelings for someone revealed, but considering you’d known him your entire life, it almost felt…desperate.
It felt as though you’d ruined everything. You never wanted Matt to find out about your feelings for him, you were planning on just ignoring these feelings and letting them go away. Knowing them for as long as you have, it felt almost wrong, like you weren’t supposed to have these feelings because of your friendship.
You groaned and dropped back on your bed, grabbing a pillow and pressing it against your face to muffle yourself. Tomorrow you’d be over this, you knew the embarrassment and shame would go away quickly. You’d never been the type to let something like this hold you down, but you figured it was the shock of it all happening so quickly.
It felt like you were laying there for ages, your pillow resting on your face lightly and your arms resting above your head. Your phone vibrated next to you, your hand reaching for it blindly as the other pushed your pillow off of your head. You figured it was a text from Nick, probably asking you if you wanted to talk about it or something along those lines.
Your heart stopped in your chest when Matt’s name lit up your screen. You immediately opened the text, your hands shaking as you read over the three words over and over again.
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moralofallthestories · 4 months ago
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CK s6 part1 spoilers‼️
This is going to be mostly my rant on ep5 and some plots from the previous episodes
- My heart BREAKS for Tory, it’s like the writers just decided to add more on top of the misery from her story last season. S5 the girl broke up with someone she loves and cares about for Kreese’s plan, ended up hurting herself badly and had no one by her side the entire season, and now they just decided to kill off her mom just when her life is starting to get better. What did she do to deserve this??
- Look how quickly Daniel and Johnny moved on to Hawk for their selections literally after they all learned about Tory’s mother’s death, like if you both are such good senseis, wouldn’t it be nice to actually give a shit about Tory and her grief?? Instead of making if about yourself, how about we actually go console her and making sure she’s okay or at least be there? Both of them are such bad mentors for the kids, first is how they handled Kenny’s situation after he got humiliated with the accident, Johnny only spoke up when he’s fighting for Devon and Daniel rlly favors his kids than his other students. If any of these two even showed the same attention and support to Kenny and Tory, I’m sure neither of them would actually quit Miyagi-Do so quickly on the spot. Some sensei they really are huh.
- Robby my man, I get that going to the Sekai Taikai is important for you but are you really gonna do nothing after your girlfriend’s meltdown about her mother’s death? At this point this show’s writing is so bad I don’t wanna hear about any “they probably did this off-screen” kinda bullshit no more. I swear if part 2 has any point of showing him standing on the moral high ground accusing Tory of switching sides like what he did to her in s5 imma riot, cancel my Netflix subscription along with my family plan :))
- Based on s5 and what we’ve seen so far, my headcanon for Robby & Tory is that he’s the one that usually texts her first and he texts more but she’s not good with it, she’s not good with expressing her emotions either so sooner or later they’re gonna face this communication problem in the relationship (of which the problem was clearly shown before in s5 when they “broke up”)
- While the privileged kids talking about their top colleges and applications, what Robby and Tory had was the Sekai Taikai - underdogs in the top 4
- Devon, my girl…not a good decision…why you choose to go on that path
- I can never like Anthony he really gets on my nerves
- Bad writing with all those conflicts overall, hated how they handled Kenny’s character especially trying to embarrassing him for the flag fight. I was hoping to see him and his brother in more action but you can never expect too much from Cobra Kai writers I guess
- The baby storyline continues…the most boring and unnecessary storyline that ruins Johnny’s character as a father and a sensei
- CK really has this type of half assed writing throughout all seasons why am I surprised lmao
The good part:
- Sam & Tory’s reconciliation and their apologies to each other, the sleepover pillow fight was so cute and I love seeing both of them are so done with Johnny’s instigating
- Robby and Tory’s promise of standing together
- How Robby found himself & his confidence again after seeing Tory showed up, this is what partners influence each other
- Robby & Tory’s little nod to each other whenever one of them is fighting someone else, no words but it means so much more
- Johnny & Mike’s fight - it has to be purely a fan service kinda fight but I’ll take it
- Hawk & Demitri’s fight, unnecessary but it surely was entertaining
- Kyler’s redemption, I’m actually happy they didn’t give him a glamorous redemption and try to change him completely to let him join Miyagi-Do, it’s nice to see that his frat boy personality is still there
- Kwon’s fighting skills are some real deal
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charmingly-helpless · 5 months ago
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the agent and the killer
A/N: oh man I am not good at coming up with titles. anyway i can't get unsub!emily off my mind so here's a small fic. just two parts for now while i decide if i want to write more :) enjoy!
pairing: unsub!emily prentiss x agent!reader
warnings: talks of murder, emily being scary, intimidation, i think that's all?
word count: 1121
Read on AO3
Part 1 Part 2
You hummed in your kitchen as you cleaned up after dinner, enjoying the silent night after a very long and tiring case. As you loaded the dishes into the dishwasher, some movement outside the window caught your eye. You brushed it off as a deer that frequently wandered through backyards in your neighborhood and continued with your chores. 
Behind the bushes, the brunette woman smiled when she saw you alone. It’ll be easier to get you. She started walking to the back door that separated the two of you. Reaching the handle, she picked the lock, smiling when the handle became loose. Now she can get her latest victim.
The door jiggling behind you raised the alarm bells in your head. You whipped around to see a dark haired woman in the doorway. You reached for your gun that was placed on the kitchen counter, aiming it at the woman. 
Emily made a tsk tsk noise at you, shaking her head.
“Now, now… Is that any way to greet someone in your home?”
You lowered your gun slightly as you recognized the intruder.
“Emily Prentiss.”
“Ah… You know who I am,” Emily said mockingly. She closed the door behind her and stepped closer to you.
You kept your face stoic. “What are you doing here?”
Emily chuckled before replying. “What am I doing here? Well, what I’m doing is hunting for my next victim. And I’ve got my eye on you.”
You freezed momentarily to process her words. 
“It’s you.”
Emily cocked her head, “Who am I?”
“You’re the serial killer we’ve been looking for. You target men in law enforcement who abuse their power. We’ve been following your trail for the past six months.” You paused. “Why am I your next victim? I don’t fit in your criteria.”
Emily continued backing you up into the wall, smirking once you had nowhere else to go. “You’re a profiler, you tell me.”
You swallowed thickly, never taking your eyes off of her dark brown ones. “Because I’m your replacement.”
Emily hummed with a quirk of her lips. “Good girl. You really are good at your job, just like Hotch said.”
You slowly moved your heel to hit the SOS button you had installed underneath the kitchen cabinets to alert the team. However, Emily’s keen sense of hearing caught the faint buzz the signal made. 
“What’s that sound? You’re signaling your fellow agents to come over and rescue you?” Emily shook her head. “Here I was hoping for a private time with you. Now they’re gonna come and ruin our fun…”
“Why are you killing all of those people?”
“You know why.”
“But why?”
“Those men needed to be taught a lesson.” Emily paused. She steps right in front of you, pushing your gun aside to make room for her body. “They always underestimate a female agent… They see me as weak. I’m tired of it.”
You shuddered as she invaded your space. “You aren’t the only female agent to be underestimated. Not the first, not the last. I became a Supervisory Special Agent at only 28, and I continue to be looked down by most of the men I work with. What makes you different? What made you snap?”
A dark chuckle escaped Emily’s lips when she thought about your question. She shook her head before looking back into your eyes, observing your face with an annoyed expression.
“You think you understand exactly the position I’m in? You know nothing about how they look at me… Judging me behind my back that I don’t know what I’m doing. Do you know why I lost my job?”
When you shook your head, she continued. 
“I killed the man who stabbed me and left me for dead. He made my life a living hell, always lingering over me wherever I went. I lived in fear for years, and when I had the chance to end it, I took it. And that cost me my job that I worked so hard for. And yet, when Hotch killed the person who murdered his wife, he got a paid absence from work. Don’t you see what’s wrong with that? People saw him as a person acting on his grief. And they see me as a killer.”
You noticed the pain and rage she held in her eyes as she told her story. “Not everyone looks at you that way.”
Emily scoffed at your attempt to make her feel better. “Oh… What? You think you’re different? That you don’t look down on me? You’re just like them, thinking you have control over me.”
Your gaze softened, your empathetic nature getting the best of you. You set your gun down on the counter, pushing it away. Emily’s eyes followed your movement and then snapped back to your face in surprise.
“What are you doing? Why didn’t you shoot me?” she asked, her voice calm but held a sense of disbelief.
You stayed silent, also wondering why you would potentially let a criminal get away. When Emily’s eyebrow lifts prompting you to answer, you sighed.
“I don’t think I hold control over you. I don’t want to have control over anyone.”
Emily’s eyes darkened at the double entendre. She took hold of your wrists and pinned them above your head as she leaned in closer.
“No control, huh?”
Your eyes flutter closed as her breath fanned your ear. Why am I feeling like this towards a serial killer we’ve been chasing for months, you wonder.
Emily noticed your breath quickening and smirked to herself. “What’s this, agent? Are you feeling something for me…?”
You let your head fall back against the wall, relishing in her small kisses on your neck, her teeth grazing your skin so softly. However, the reality of your situation pulled you out of your daze. 
“The team will get here soon.”
Emily pulled back with a groan of annoyance. “Well, this moment can’t last forever, can it?”
She let go of your wrists, stepping away from you and heading toward the door.
“Emily,” you called out, to your own surprise.
Emily stopped when she heard her name, turning around with an eyebrow raised. 
You racked through your brain, thinking of what to say.
“Stay safe.”
Emily’s eyes softened at your words, but her face remained expressionless, not wanting to reveal her weakness to you.
“How interesting… An agent telling a wanted criminal to stay safe.”
You hold back your words as Emily lingered by the door. She broke her stare to look out the window where she could hear sirens approaching, but still a good distance away.  
“I’ll see you next time, agent,” she said softly before slipping out into the darkness, like many nights before.
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theidiotwhowritesthings · 2 years ago
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I am IN LOVE with your writing!  I’m a dedicated reader! 💓💓 thanks for taking the time to do it!
Hear me out. Reader pulls a 24 hour shift in the local clinic on a busy day and we get a protective worried din?
He would also be busy but he would definitely pull reader out and make her take a nap AT LEAST. 😂 anyway, I just thought that would be cute to think about.
I hope you have a wonderful day and keep up the good work! 
[a/n: anybody wanna guess how many times it took me to try and post this b/c tumblr wanted to keep glitching and destroying it?? FUCKING FOUR. lord, im gonna go scream in a pillow. anyways, thanks anon for the great idea! also pls consider this my apology for the cliffhanger that i am so sorry (but not really) for.]
'A FRESH START' DELETED SCENE
Din Djarin x Female!Reader
Warnings: reader overworks herself, mentions of injuries (burns specifically) but not in great detail
Word Count: 1,934
Summary: Everyone needs a break, and Din is hell bent on ensuring you don't skip yours.
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#MID 17: TAKE A BREAK, DOC
[so not between chapters, but a scene within one of the time breaks in chapter 17.]
.
"be with someone who will take care of you. not materialistically but take care of your soul, your well being, your heart, and everything that's you." -unknown
.
Trying to get the emergency clinic established was not easy. You agreed to the job, and Karga had given you free reign. The High Magistrate was essentially allowing you to run the clinic as you saw fit. Which in part was fantastic because it gave you incredible freedom, but it was also your worst nightmare. All your training had taught you was how to handle the medical aspect of an office. The business and organization side was a whole other issue. Especially because the people of Nevarro were not understanding that this was for emergencies only. 
“My ankle hurts.”
“Alright, when did this start? When did you get hurt?”
“I twisted it while jogging three years ago.”
“You⏤ Wait, what?”
In order for this to work the way it needed to, you’d have to focus on actual emergencies only. Alone you would never be able to handle the patient load that would come with servicing an entire city. Plus, you really didn’t want to. The amount of time it would take to even attempt that was insane, and Din needed your help with Grogu.
So, the plan would be to establish that this clinic was emergencies only, emphasize it to everyone who walked in the door, but for today you’d manage all the small, routine problems.
Just for today.
By lunch time, you had already seen 47 patients. None of which were emergent. In fact, the biggest injury was a young man who had dropped a glass plate at home and accidentally cut his hand. He needed four stitches. 
“Aayla?”
“Four more in the waiting room, doctor!” Aayla called out without even having to be asked the question. She was a gift from the Maker today. Already, you had decided to try training her more in depth medically and hire someone else to work the front desk. “You also have a guest.
“What?” You breathed, barely able to catch her words.
Aayla didn’t need to repeat herself because that was the moment Din swept into the room with the same confident strut he naturally seemed to have. At the sight of him, you couldn’t help but let out a sigh of relief as your lips curled up into a smile.
“What is going on?” Din asked as he drifted closer to you. There were still two patients sitting on cots waiting for you to finish with them, but Din commandeered your attention by settling his hand on your lower back and staring down at you. Even through the helmet you could feel his concerned gaze. “Why are you so busy? I thought you were hired for emergencies only.”
“I was, but apparently nobody told all of Nevarro that.”
Din stiffened. “Did Karga⏤”
“No. I don’t think he tricked me into this or that this was on purpose.” You said quickly. “And everyone who comes in, I’m telling them that from now on it’s emergencies only.”
“But today?”
“Today, I am seeing every Nevarro citizen.” You chuckled. “You want a check up, Mando?”
“Ner kar’ta,” Din shook his head, “Have you taken any breaks at all?” You shot him a sheepish smile. “Come. Let’s get lunch.”
“I can’t. I’ll just get further behind.” You mumbled. Din looked like he was ready to argue with you. In fact, his hands even drifted to his hips as his head tilted. You had seen him take on the same stance before lecturing Grogu. You wrapped your hands around his forearm and gave him the most reassuring smile you could muster. “It’s fine. I’m just sorry I’m bailing on you for lunch.” He sighed. “You poor thing, now you’ll have to spend more time with Mayfeld.”
Din huffed and you chuckled. Aayla called out that more people were filling the space, and for a second you thought the Mandalorian Marshal was considering sending everybody home just so you could have a moment for lunch. You squeezed his forearm. 
“Fine.” Din grumbled.
“Also, I know this won’t help my argument or convince you of anything, but,” You scrunched your nose with a small wince, “Do you think you can pick up Grogu today?”
Din seemed taken aback based on his voice alone, “How long do you plan on staying?”
You knew his question was one more focused on the concern of you staying here for too long versus him being upset that you couldn’t get Grogu. When you shot him another sheepish smile he just grumbled under his breath in Mando’a. Din caught you off guard by leaning forward to lightly rest his forehead against yours for a second. 
“This conversation isn’t over.” Din said simply and you just chuckled in response.
He squeezed your hand once before leaving and you were forced to return to the patients you had. Ten minutes passed at the most, you got two patients out with Aayla’s help, when Din’s heavy footfalls returned. You glanced over your shoulder to see he was holding a bag of food. He crossed the space to set the bag in your hands and you peered in to see it was your favorite sandwich from the local shop. Your eyes glanced back up at him with a grin. The warmth of being seen and known settling in your chest.
“Eat.” Din said firmly.
“Thank you.” You replied. “I’ll eat it as soon as⏤”
“No.” He interrupted. A tilt to his head and a challenge in his voice. “I’m not leaving until I watch you take a few bites. At the least.”
You rolled your eyes, in good nature, and handed him the bag so you could wash your hands in the sink off to the side. On your way back to Din, you asked Aayla to bandage one patient’s knee and get imaging of another patient’s hand. Din had already pulled out your sandwich to set on the desk you had brought into the corner. Before you could reach for it, Din pointed to the desk chair. With a chuckle you dropped down into the seat, the first time you were off your feet all morning, and only then did Din push the sandwich toward you. 
“Thanks.” You said after your first bite. More sincere than your last. Din was leaning against the desk beside you. Close enough that your arm could press against his thigh if you moved it over even an inch. “You didn’t have to do this.”
“Apparently, I did.” Din chuckled. “Otherwise, you wouldn’t have eaten at all.”
You couldn't argue. Instead, you just shook your head, “Not gonna lie, I always did have a bad habit of getting caught up in my work.”
“Why does that not surprise me?”
“Doctor, can you take a look at this?” Aayla called out.
You quickly took one last, large bite of your sandwich before standing. Din pushed off the desk to tower over you again. He nodded. “I’ll pick up Grogu, but if you’re not home by 5 I’m coming back to drag you home.”
“Is that a threat or a promise?” You teased.
Din leaned over to lightly tap his forehead against yours and you chuckled. He reached over to pick up your sandwich and held it up towards you. You raised an eyebrow at him, but he didn’t budge. Rolling your eyes, you leaned over and took another bite. Holding a hand over your mouth, tucking the food into your cheek, you spoke. “Happy?”
“Yes. Be careful. Message me if you need anything.”
You watched him leave with a bemused smile.
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Never before had you been so acutely aware of the saying ‘when it rains, it pours’. Today had already been stressful and busy so it would make sense that at 4:25 in the afternoon an actual emergency rolled in. Nothing to test and stretch your skills like having to handle a trauma case after a full day of working. There had been an incident, on the other side of this world deep in the lava plains, where a group of smugglers got a bit too close to a river of lava with their weapons and nearly blew one another sky high. 
The least injured of the three had flown them in. She had some superficial burns all along her left side. Then the other two had third degree burns that required some serious fluid replacement. You didn’t stop working, barely paused to take a breath, until all three were stable and resting comfortably. Only then did you drop down into your desk’s chair and rest your head on your arms with a sigh. 
About twenty minutes later, a pair of hands settled on your shoulders, squeezing in comfort, and you would’ve been startled if you didn’t recognize the creak of Din’s leather with the comforting smell of his flight suit’s detergent and the polish used on his beskar. 
“What time is it?” You groaned.
“8:42.”
“You’re nearly four hours late.”
Din squeezed your shoulders once more before letting a hand settle on the back of your neck. You found the weight of it grounded you. “I got here at 4:50. Saw you were busy with something important. Left then came back.” His thumb caressed your skin, and you pushed your head up to glance at him. Din had the hand not on your neck resting on the desk. “You alright?”
“Just tired.” You mumbled and rubbed your face with one hand. “Grogu?”
“He’s with Peli. Missed you at dinner though.” Din replied. “He acts up when you’re not around.”
“No, no. He’s a perfect angel, always.”
Din snorted at that, and the sound made you chuckle. You glanced over at the cots that held the three smugglers who slept soundly. All their vitals still stable. Din’s hand slipped down to rub your upper back soothingly. “You coming home?”
“I can’t. Not until the emergency shuttle gets here to pick those three up.” You sighed. “They have to be at a facility with a higher level of care than just me.”
“‘Just you’ saved their lives.”
“You know what I mean.” You shrugged. “You should go though.” Din tilted his head. “There’s no telling how long it’ll take for the ship to get here. I already sent Aayla home. I’m just babysitting right now. You should pick up Grogu and head home. Get some sleep.”
Din shook his head as if it were the stupidest thing you had ever said. He gently wrapped his hand around your upper arm and pulled you up from your seat. You let him drag you along to the fourth cot in the room which was currently empty. “You sleep. I’ll babysit.” 
“Din…”
He lightly pushed down on your shoulders until you were seated on the cot. You stared up at him in question, but he just shook his head. “If something changes with their status I’ll wake you.” Din pushed you down a little further so you were laying down. The moment your body hit the relatively soft bed you felt yourself sink into it with exhaustion. Din went to walk, but you grabbed his hand and tugged him toward the cot as well.
“You can babysit while laying down, can’t you?”
“My armor isn’t gonna be much of a pillow.”
“Neither is this cot.”
Din chuckled and dropped down to lay beside you. You rested your head on his chest, the cool metal of the beskar biting into your warm cheek, and just sighed. It hadn’t occurred to you how tired you truly were until now. Din had an arm wrapped around you so he could grasp your shoulder with his hand and use his thumb to trace patterns there.
“Take a break, doc.” Din hummed. “I got you.”
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taglist:
@aheadfullofsteverogers @yyiikes @kneelforloki @c-ms1ut @sgt-morgan @luthienaliceisilra @fawn-kitten @missbabyjay @coldlamaspersonspy @dilfsaremyfavourite @jamesbuckybarnes @yorkeylover @teawrites01 @emily-roberts @djarinxore @impala1967666 @shelbyteller @faithrenner @dindjarindude @dankfarrick29 @rh1nestonecowg1rl @garbo-lesbo @anythingforattention @tearfulsolace @onceinamando @catharinaroxastova @uwu-i-purple-you @modiddys-blog @stagerightlauren @mini-bees @xxinvisblexx @adoringanakin @sagegreensensei @spidey-3 @sydney-1209 @thepascalofus @hrtsforpascal @banana-lol @daybleedsintonightfall11 @lil-dragon-draws @guccistardust @ideajpeg @harriedandharassed @leithatnight @elfamosotoga @damnzelsoul @the-anchored-sailor-girl @morks-watermelon @katelynmarieyt @taylorann2013 @chonkercatto @dheet @liadamerondjarin @fallinallinmendes @missdicaprio @jennaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa @alphaash99 @djarinsmixtape @pcrushinnerd @closedaddition @thelovelyhann @harrys-sunflower-bakery @mayaaaaah @theway-thisis
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sunflower-author · 6 months ago
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HI i've been obsessed with akaashi atm so could you do yandere akaashi
he'd be such a sneaky yandere since he's so observant and memorises your little mannerisms and personality. he knows just what to say to you and other people as well to get you all to himself
anyway idm what you do, have fun with it!! hope you have a good day <33
SORRY IK IT IS SUPER LATE, AND I TRULY WANTED TO DO THIS!!
ALSO I WAS RAMBLING A LOT BUT HOPE YOU LIKE IT;)
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      It's a Friday and school just ended, you go to the usual spot to meet Akaashi before he has to practice. A bench under the tree, on the opposite side of the gym, giving you guys time to talk, before making it to the gym.
After some time you see Akaashi turn the corner, from sitting on the bench you stand up to greet him. Smiling as you make your way toward him. 
"There you are, I was wondering if you ever were gonna come," you say jokingly.
"Sorry, that was my bad I was caught up with some schoolwork," Akaashi says. In reality, he was writing in his notebook about you. He has a notebook, where he keeps specific tabs about you. Your likes and dislikes, also including plans about what he would want in the future, plans like...
.
.
.
"Y/N, I was wondering if after practice today, would you want to come over to my house to study?" Akaashi says walking.
"Sure, our AP test is coming up, and I'll be lucky if I get 3/5," you say shyly, following after him. (Headcanon that Akaashi takes AP classes) *ALSO I SWEAR I'M GONNA FAIL THAT TEST!!!*
"No comment," Akaashi says as he continues to walk.
"Hey why'd you say that?" you ask, confused and a bit offended.
"Well.. what did you think I would say?" Akaashi asks curious.
"I don't know, just not that, maybe something encouraging at least," you say, trying to defend yourself.
"If I say something encouraging either one, you would hype yourself up thinking your gonna do well,  then do just below that, and get all sad and guilty," 
"When have I ever done anything like that?" you ask not believing that you would do anything like that.
 "Remember your Biology finial, you said that you wanted to get at least a 90, I said how you've been studying so your gonna do amazing, but then you got 89. You ended up with a B for that class, you stayed in you room a whole week during summer, all depressed."
"It dropped my perfect GPA," you say defending yourself.
"Or two, you would study all the time till you only do well on that one test and forget about the rest, before you say anything, midterms... Your lucky it was only midterms."
"That only happened once," In your defense you learned never to try that again.
Rolling his eyes he finally says "Or three, if I encourage you right now, you might not take studying seriously and think you can just wing the test, and therefore end up failing."
"Oh yeah.. I do that one a lot don't I," you say embarrassed.
"You have been improvising a lot more than you usually have, now that I think about it, is something wrong?" Akaashi asks concerned.
"Oh.. you've noticed that?" you ask as you stopped walking, looking down ashamed. " I admit that I have not been studying as much as before... I just feel like I'm burning out... or maybe I am burnt out..." 
Akaashi going right in front of you, he just pats your head, it may seem small, but it is your favorite form of affection from him. 
"You know it is normal to be burnt out, the important and most hardest part is overcoming it. I'm always free when you need me. If you want I'll skip practice today, we can just go straight to my house," Akaashi offers.
"That's very sweet of you Keji, but the volleyball team really needs you. You're the only one who can handle Bokuto, and I can't imagine how sad Bokuto would be when he finds out you're not there today." You reassure him.
"You know I care about you, more than I care about volleyball and Bokuto, just say the word and we can go to my house," Akaashi says, persisting.
"Keji, pretty soon is the Spring Nationals, you need to prepare, I'll meet you after your practice," you say as you start to part ways.
Unexpectedly Akaashi follows you grabbing you hand softly.
"Where are you going," he asks. Normally you would wait for him in the gym's girls locker rooms, till his practice is over, since there was air condition inside.
"I thought that today.. I would go stay in class and wait for you, maybe study a bit before.. so that you don't need to catch me up on anything, then we can study faster tonight," you said.
"What are you hiding?" he ask.
"I'm not hiding anything," you said defending yourself.
"You're avoiding eye contact with me, you keep scratching your neck, and your more defensives than normal, I can tell when you are trying to hide something Y/N," he said. After a few more moments of silence you finally confessed.
"Alright fine... one of my friends invited me to join track practice today, I know you don't want to join any sports, but it was just a practice, I'm not going to join," you said admittingly.
"Was that all you were trying to hide?" Akaashi asks, acting surprised. "I'm sorry if you felt like that was something you had to hide from me," his words so soothing, hiding the venom within.
"It was just because whenever I tell you about a club I was going to join you would always turn the idea down, or convince me not to do the club," 
"That is not true-"
"Soft tennis, kyudo, archery, ice skating, and now track and field," you cut him off, apparently Akaashi was not the only one that was keeping tabs on their partner.
"I just don't want you getting hurt, and plus who knows...  what if you get too involved in the sport and fall behind in school, also when you compete would you be willing to do it, all eyes would be on you, I know you get anxious in a crowd, and when you compete your coach, teammates, friends would all be counting on you," Akaashi explains.
"Yeah your right," you say, realizing that you shouldn't have thought about ever joining a sport, there would be no way you would be able to handle the stress and pressure. 
"I just thought I would be cool to have a sport since your in volleyball, I didn't want you to think I was lazy or something," you say timid.
"I would never think that about you, I know how much you study, how much you help your family around the house, I would never think of you as lazy," He says commending. "But just out of curiosity what type of event would you have picked if you were to do track and field?" he ask.
"It would be pole vault," you say. Hearing those words Akaashi was so glad to have convinced you not to. 
Pole vaulter's have upper body strength, and in the emergency of him kidnapping you, with you having some upper body strength it would just be irritating. He would win though. 
"Pole vault?" he asks, hesitantly.
"Is there a problem?" you ask curiously.
"It is just that pole vaulting is one of the most hardest events, and you're just going to jump into trying it," is all he says. 
But that was more than enough. What were you thinking, trying to pole vault, your in your 3rd year. Image trying to practice, how underclassmen will just see how bad you are. They must be way better, the season started 1 month ago. Also there was other events practicing too, image all those eyes on you.
"Yeah your right, it was just a dumb idea, I'm gonna text my friend that I'm busy," you said as you pulled up your phone, and started texting.
As you start to walk towards the gym with Akaashi following behind you.
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amarizuu · 5 months ago
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Hello! I saw your post that the ask box is open for asking your great 7 au,so lemme just jump right in with the questions
Question: if/when yuu has panic or anxiety attacks,what do the great seven do to comfort them?
Question #2: what does maleficent think of silver,sebek and Lilia?
Hi guys! I have finally come alive in this account and here to continue writing. Though I am not sure when will be the next post in this account since I am at my relative's house right now and is staying with my cousins right now, let's start.
NOTE: Not Proofread(Terrible Grammar apologies), The characters are part of my AU, and Yuu uses They/Them. I did some bits of research on what to do when someone has a panic attack. If I did something wrong, please tell me ^^/
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Q.1: If Yuu has a panic attack whether be it the past or present the Great Seven will try their best to help them as they have high respects towards them or they are currently in their kingdom as it is their responsibility.
Maleficent, Ursula, Jafar, Queen Grimhilde & Hades: Has yet to experienced
Maleficent: I have yet to experience the sight of it, but if they do experience it. I remember learning from books, humans needs a sense of peace and comfort.
(Maleficent will try to sing/hum to them and send everyone out, leaving the two alone in the room)
Ursula: Yes, I've read and seen different folks experiencing them, however, not with the case of Yuu. Just like the Thorn Fairy mention comfort and peace will be required. There's nothing I need in return, just hope little guppie will never experience it.
(Ursula will try to bring Yuu their grounding, using one of her tentacles and sticking onto Yuu, trying to get their sense and won't leave them alone. The two eels will make sure nobody will disturb them. Yuu gets lots of hugs from the three of them, though Ursula always shoos them away, thinking they might feel crowded.)
Jafar: ...
Hades: ...
Ursula: If I'm gonna expect from you two, you guys never seen or experienced it?
Hades: Look, I don't think those things can kill anyone--
Maleficent: They don't.
Jafar: It just hasn't come to my mind about it since the Sultan hasn't experienced it.
Ursula: Teaching you a few things after this talk
Jafar: Anything from you will make it sound like a deal.
Hades: Gotta agree with the snake here.
(Hades and Jafar will slowly learn about it, though Hades will definitely will try to comfort Yuu in his own way and Jafar will do the same since he has a hard time expressing his thoughts during the process of it, his priority is to calm down Yuu.)
Queen Grimhilde[Aka Evil Queen]: Yuu is a strong warrior that experienced such things and may handle it alone. Now, we are here, we hope that we could be there for Yuu just like how Yuu was there for us in our troubles.
Maleficent: I do agree. We just hope now Yuu will stop thinking they are just a vessel for us to exist.
(Queen Grimhilde will act in a similar way from Maleficent, comforting Yuu in a motherly way and hold them tightly in their arms. Since she had an experience with Snow White [Their story played out different in my AU] she has some knowledge of taking care of Yuu herself.)
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Queen of Hearts & Scar: Experienced
Queen of Hearts: Unlike the others, during a tea party in my caslte, I have witnessed Yuu having a panic attack. But it is not in my place to share such events.
"Hedgehog is something the matter?" The Queen ask as she suddenly noticed Yuu's behavior. They suddenly stopped talking and stared at the cup for a long time. They started to breathe heavily as their body start to shake. The servants around them look at each other in worry but their eyes were mostly on Yuu and it made Yuu drop the cup in their hand.
The Queen stood up and the servant tried to move an inch but the Queen was only mad, mad that they couldn't read the room at this very moment.
"Everyone, I demand everyone to leave the garden. Nobody. Not even the gardeners should be here"
"But your majesty, the broken--"
"OFF. With. your. head. It's an order!"
The guards around them carried that person as they were frozen in fear. The rest of the servants had no choice but to follow, they all leave in a hurry leaving nothing but the two individuals alone.
The Queen sighed in relief as she slowly walked up to Yuu, bending to their level and carefully avoiding the cups. She finally noticed how pale Yuu had suddenly become and saw their body shaking up close. The Queen frowned and took Yuu's hands into her own. Her anger subsided upon seeing the person she trusted the most so vulnerable—the person who once held the sword against her enemies now reduced to this state. Her anger subsidded seeing the person whom she trusted the most be this vulnerable, the person who hold the sword against her enemies suddenly turned out like this.
"Hedgehog it's me, can you hear me dear?"
Queen of Hearts: So now we only have tea alone. Just the two of us, though there are guards around but not close ,so Yuu can be at peace.
Scar: I have a similar experience , though it was during training. And we had an audience, which was my fault. I think my pride got the better of me and didn't think about the situation on the little Cub's part.
Queen Hearts: Dear sake...Scar?!
Scar: They've been in many battles, didn't think it had an affect like it.
As Scar was about to start fighting, he noticed the stance Yuu was doing didn't look like their normal fighting stance. Scar's tail flicked, and his ear twitched. Something didn't sit right.
Cheers from afar echoed throughout the arena which made Scar smile, his people are looking at him but his eyes trailed back to Yuu. Just when the battle starts, Scar stopped himself as he finally noticed something strange. Yuu's grip has loosen and his complection looks terrible under the sun.
"Everyone! It seems that something may occur. This battle will be postpone."
The hyenas frowned and accepted it as they left. Scar ran over to Yuu--
"Hey, little cub, you don't look too good-"
He stopped and caught Yuu from falling, hitting their body against his. His eyes widened as he slowly brought them down to the ground. Their body shaking and they don't look focus at all, they probably don't even realize they have fallen yet.
"Calm down. Nobody is here now. It's just us..."
Scar: I didn't wanna be a dick and use that as an advantage to fight them.
Queen of Hearts: Good. If you were, I might need to wage war against your kingdom.
Scar: Tsk..
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Q.2: Maleficent's thoughts about Silver, Sebek, and Lilia?
SILVER:
"Regarding to that student. my first impression of him was of a knight, he has that aura he gives off and loyalty, it's quite nice to see a student like him in such a school like this. However, I do wonder how we always find him sleeping, does the kid have yet to get sleep? I'm quite concerned for his health."
SEBEK:
"Loud boy aint he. Sometimes, whenever I hear a loud voice it makes me think I am back in the forest when humans get lost, they shout so loud for help knowing they are alone..lost. His loyalty still stands strong which I like, there's a lot of knightly students in that dorm, hm? I do quite like it."
LILIA:
"His second appearance was quite a startle but it made me chuckle as he was hanging upside down. He does care about his dormleader who is unfortunately not approachable, I could say I could feel the same sentiments as him. He does have quite a charm doesn't he? Though his performance during that Savanaclaw's battle... was something."
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Thank you for reading! Hope you guys enjoyed it. See you all in my next post :D
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starseneyes · 1 month ago
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Loser Siblings - Morgan + Sasha - Nobody Wants This
First off, I do not condone or support infidelity. I actually have a big problem with it. I've rated films a full star down for infidelity before.
But the dynamic between these two and how it's written and performed is gorgeous. I don't get to watch a lot of television these days (surgeries, and work drama, and life stuff, oh, my!), so this was my introduction to both Timothy Simons and Justine Lupe.
They're both phenomenal actors, and I'm excited to see what they do with their material in S2 (just saw the renewal! Huzzah!!) especially after seeing how deftly and hilariously they handled S1.
Not gonna spoil anything before we get past the "Keep Reading" barrier, but I really wanted to do a breakdown of the Loser Sibling chemistry, the writing, the framing, and the weird little moments of symmetry that may—or may not be—intentional.
SPOILER ALERT: Yes, I am going to talk about the show in its entirety in detail. You are forewarned. Also, no judgement if you want to take a bathroom break first or just save this to your phone to read later. I have a lot to say.
Alright, everybody ready to dive into this tale of toeing the line on infidelity? Yeah, let's dive in.
"Is Esther cheating on me? Whatever, I'll stay with her."
This says so much about his psyche. From moment one, he thinks that he is not worthy of loyalty in a partner.
He would be unsurprised to find out his wife is cheating on him. And he is so resigned to that fact, that he would be willing to stay with her if she did.
Now, we all know that sentiment absolutely does not go both ways (not that it should), but it's a little heartbreaking to get this very early glimpse into how little Sasha values himself.
And, of course, these early scenes are designed to establish the relationships. That's why Morgan had to mention their mother to Joanne while at the ATM, and why Noah has to find some way to show he and Sasha are brothers.
But in these little moments of necessary exposition strung in as dialogue, we get to know our characters.
"You have to stop letting Mom cut your hair." "Is somebody jealous? I just don't look like myself when she doesn't cut it."
Identity is a big thing. How we see ourselves. How we see ourselves compared to others. How we interpret others see us. We've established that Sasha's mother is a big part of his identity.
"Sash, I tried to convince Esther to come over, but, you know, I lost her as soon as I said we were watching the game." "Oh, that makes sense."
We see right here that Sasha is unfazed that Esther doesn't want to join. And, honestly, husbands and wives don't need to be joined at the hip.
My husband loves horror. While I can do a good thriller, I'm not a horror girlie, in general. So, I send him on dates with other friends (male and female) to see horror movies.
We're completely comfortable with this arrangement. So, I'm not going to judge Esther for not wanting to be there to watch a game.
And we set up the dynamic that Sasha is used to doing things without his wife. It's not bad or good, just a part of the story.
"Why do we do this every year?" "Because some divorces are meant to be celebrated." "Like yours!"
And now we know a little bit more about Morgan. Now, we don't know a lot about this marriage, but we do know that her mom was glad when it was over, and Morgan seems miffed by her glee.
"Should we grab your sister? Or does that not matter." "She's right here with me." "Hi. I matter."
Right here. Right from the beginning we see that Joanne is seen as the decision maker, as the person who matters. And there's Morgan who is literally one half of the show having to stick up for herself.
The other thing that really stands out in this scene is that Kristen Bell and Justine Lupe crush it as sisterly chemistry.
It was there in the earlier scenes, but seeing them in the family dynamic, and then on the phone at the end, you really feel like this bond is lived-in and settled. And that is all a testament to the performances of these two phenoms.
"No, I'm coming with you!" "Fine! Just don't tell Esther." "I'm not gonna tell Esther."
This exchange tells us a lot about these two. First off, Sasha just invited himself to be the third wheel on a date. At this point, he knows a cute, tiny, blonde girl showed up and is now outside waiting for his brother.
He has no idea he is going to meet another cute blonde girl when he heads outside. He really invited himself to be the third wheel on a date, and Noah just said, "Fine".
And my heart kinda aches for Sasha because he really just wants to get out of the house and be around people. This is only episode two, but for those of us who've seen the whole series, this guy really doesn't go much of anywhere without his brother.
Like, they have their friends they play basketball with, but other than that, he spends a lot of time alone.
Also, as much as the scene before cements Morgan and Joanne, this one locks in Noah and Sasha. They really feel like siblings who are used to taking care of each other, putting up with each other, and trusting the hell out of each other. Adam Brody and Timothy Simons knock it out of the park.
Holy shit, this show has no weak links.
"What are you doing? What is happening? Why is he getting in the car?"
It's ridiculous, but this is peak romcom, folks. It's a misunderstanding. He didn't notice the meaning behind Morgan's "we" and he's committed to the night.
Some meet cutes are sweet. Some are funny. Some annoy the shit out of both parties. In this case, only one half is annoyed, but it's still pretty damn funny.
"Are these all sweaters?" "Can you please not touch my stuff?" "It's kind of hard not to. There's so much of it... I'll just hold onto these."
Something about this is so... Sasha. Like, he has inserted himself into the night and their lives. But he is also willing to hold onto her sweaters so they don't get smashed.
Like, it's the dichotomy of his awkwardness and social blindness combined with his inborn desire to be helpful.
Also, Sasha and Morgan are passing something back and forth in the car that I can't quite make out. It almost looks like they're passing her phone back and forth, but the dialogue doesn't match. Makes me wonder if the dialogue was ADR'd later to be something different than what it was originally.
Yes, I'm that nerd. But I also spent part of my childhood in booths doing voice over replacement for Anime and then commercials. So, my brain works this way.
"Okay, so we're going?"
And even though she's annoyed by "the brother", and she came with the intent of rescuing her sister, she's willing to go along with the night. Best wingwoman ever.
Sasha has already settled in behind Joanne, but Noah makes him scoot over so he's behind Morgan. And, thus, the romcom double date begins.
Oh, yes, this is absolutely a double date. It doesn't go particularly well for Sasha. But as far as Morgan is concerned, she is playing wingwoman to her sister and the Rabbi while she has to deal with the annoying brother who wants to glom onto her.
To be clear—Morgan honestly believed Sasha wants to get with her. And she is so annoyed by him and his presumptive behavior that she is immediately turned off by him. She isn't open to even considering him because of it.
Now, we—the audience—know that Sasha is married and inserted himself as a third wheel on a date. And, yo, Sasha, not cool. But, at the same time, he simply is enjoying being out with people instead of home in his basement alone.
"The brother is brutal. Ogre emoji. Vomit emoji."
Morgan and Joanne are in panic mode trying to get the phone to stop talking, but Sasha and Noah are pretty chill, honestly. Sasha even mouths, "Is that me?" to which Noah grimaces.
Seconds ago, Sasha was annoying Noah. Now, they're on the same team ready to gang up on the ladies for the mishap.
It's mostly playful and shows their dynamic in full swing. It even takes a second for Joanne to realize the brothers are torturing the sisters for fun and aren't even offended.
At the bar, Sasha hands everyone their drinks, and the four of them are standing in pairs, again. Now, Sasha knows he's the uninvited third wheel, so he is going to let his brother be nearest the girl he's interested in. But Morgan still thinks this guy is hitting on her.
"I've got this. I'm independently wealthy 'cause my family's rich."
Morgan thinks he's trying to impress her, but he really is just mis-speaking, which he is prone to do when he is excited.
It's another place where she is misreading the situation because she's convinced he wants to hit on her and definitely wants to sleep with her.
"What about 'Slutty Shiksas'?" "Ooh, now I'm listening."
It's the first time she looks up at him with a smile. And it's brief, because she and her sister are having a tiff, but that's the first time she looked at him with anything other than disgust or annoyance.
"No, no, no. Don't just leave me stranded with him!" "A lot of tension between you guys." "No, this isn't happening."
He tries to sit down and be conversational with her, but she walks away. Again, it's the misunderstanding. She thinks he's trying to hit on her and he is so not her type.
He just wants to chat. He wants to help. It's part of his DNA.
"Oh, we're going outside? Okay."
He really doesn't understand. Because he would never think of hitting on her, and he thinks his status as "married" is established.
"You a Swiftie?" "No. Just pretending to look at songs so we don't have to talk. I mean, didn't you go to high school? Our friends are hooking up. Be cool." "Listen, I know I have a thing about me that makes people want to elbow me in the jaw." "Yeah."
Up until this moment, she still thinks he is hitting on her. She still thinks she is warding off unwanted advances. But I do think she appreciates that he at least seems a tiny bit self-aware.
"My wife says it's just-" "Wait, I'm sorry. You're married?!" "Yeah." "God, you have, like, no husband energy at all. That's scary." "I'm wearing a wedding ring." "Yeah, well I haven't been looking at you."
Sasha tries not to be offended. Because, honestly, he is tough to offend. But something in him keeps pushing for the tiniest connection as he lists off Taylor Swift albums.
"Is somebody's mom here?"
And, right there, we have the dynamic of Sasha and Esther set up. And as soon as Sasha says it's his wife, notice how Morgan backs away from him.
Now, this could just be a director's choice for the framing so Joanne and Noah can stand between them, but it also feels like Morgan subconsciously does not want to be associated with whatever is going on with Sasha and his wife.
"It's a pleasure."
He says it to Morgan. Not to Joanne. He barely looks at Joanne as he leaves. But he does look to Morgan. She keeps her eyes down, not making eye-contact. But she does watch after he walks away.
"Rebecca knows about her." "What's there to know?" "Oh, just that you brought her to Temple and stood, like, weirdly close to her."
Remember this. Because everyone paying attention to Joanne and Noah noticed they stood close to one another, right? This'll come back in the Season Finale, but not in relation to Noah and Joanne.
No, in that Season Finale our Loser Siblings are way too cozy for "just friends" at his family event. But we'll get to that later.
"And you, Esther, allowing Sasha to out with them last night? She has a sister, you know." "Oh, I saw the sister. Not worried!" "I mean, she was clearly into me, but obviously I would never-"
There is so much going on here. First off, I feel bad for Esther because you can clearly see she's been delegated the role of her husband's keeper. She is trying to live up to Bina's expectation.
Sasha is self-aware enough to know that he was getting under Morgan's skin more than anything at the bar, but maybe not self aware enough to realize he was on a double date.
Also, we see Sasha behind Esther mouthing and waving his hands to let his little brother know he didn't sell him out. This positioning is so representative of their relationship.
"What he is doing here is throwing away a relationship with literally the perfect woman."
Projecting much, Esther? If she's so perfect, you marry her! I think you'd be a happier person.
"Breaking up the family? What the fuck. I'm so sorry, man."
Sasha already warned Noah that he was having to play both sides to try to protect his brother, but also protect himself.
We've seen it in his interactions with both families—Sasha tries to redirect and shield his little brother. He wants to help.
But he also isn't standing up to his wife, here. He's letting her steamroll his brother. And you can tell he doesn't like it, but he doesn't know how to fight it.
"...Joanne's more than fun."
I love this framing. So often in life, people try to define us by one thing. You can only be one thing and that's it. You can be "serious" or "Fun". You can be "Good" or "bad".
But life is made up of grey areas in varying shades that are far more interesting and realistic than those tiny, monolithic boxes in which people want to stuff us.
We can be more than one thing. We are more than one thing. And I think this is one of those things that this show really nails.
"We love fun. But do we end up with fun?" "Yeah, have you met Esther? She's not fun. That's why I married her."
This is telling. Yes, he loves her. He does! He's loyal and dedicated and obedient (for the most part). But he thinks that the way his parents raised him to think is the way it has to be.
That's the whole premise of Noah and Joanne rocking the boat—they're subverting every expectation. Morgan thinks her sister is losing her mind. Sasha thinks his brother is hoping for too much.
They're all baked into the expectations of life that have been foisted upon them.
And, to bring us back to our Loser Siblings, they are not what the other expected, either.
Morgan expects guys who meet her expectations of the world, who meet her "type". Sasha expects to be content in his marriage no matter what, to never be excited about another woman in any way.
And that's honestly why my brain puts Esther and Rebecca together—because Esther would battle against her own self to meet the expectations of those around her because she thinks if she follows that blueprint she will have a good life.
At the end, I'd like to see Esther just as happy as everyone else—no longer trying to fit in a box, but allowing herself to flourish.
I feel like we see the first touches of her rebellion at the Bat Mitzvah when she helps Miriam cut her dress. Esther is on her own path of self-discovery.
But, I'm skipping ahead, again...
"I just thought we missed our regularly scheduled Wednesday sex night-"
Hold the phone. They have a regularly scheduled sex night!? I have three young children with varying social calendars, but we don't have any bloody scheduled sex nights!
I feel like this was Esther's idea, and Sasha went with it... even though that guy would love more than once-a-week conjugal visits in his own home.
We transition from Sasha getting none to Morgan watching her sister getting ready for some.
I love that we go from Morgan on the left side of the bed to Sasha on the left side of the bed. It's giving me real flashbacks to Three to Tango in a sweet way.
If these two ever get together, that'll be something they have to compromise on—who gets the left side.
"You just need help... someone to help... oh no, that someone is me. Are you sure you want that?"
This actually breaks my heart a bit. Because while he shakes off the loser siblings label as inevitable but not unbearable, we get a peek into his psyche, here.
He knows his daughter needs help. He's the only help available. But he still worries he's not good enough.
"Do you wanna hang out here with me? Cuddle up and watch Mission Impossible?"
This takes me back to episode 2 when Noah and Sasha are heading out of the Temple. Sasha invites Noah to come back to his place to hang out, but when he realizes his brother is going out, he begs to tag along.
Throughout the entirety of the season, we get a sense of just how isolated Sasha is. His wife is always off with her best friend. He has the basketball guys, but that's about it, and they don't seem all that close.
And it's tougher on the Morgan side. She hangs out with her sister and shared friends only once at the gym. So, we don't really have a good scope of her social circle beyond her dates.
Hopefully season 2 will give us more to chew on for Morgan's social circle...
"Oh. I have to let you know before anything happens. I think I'm in a relationship with a teenage boy I met on the internet." "Oh, does he know about me?"
And this is why she would never think he would hide anything real from her. Because this is stupid, ridiculous shit and he still told her about it.
But, remember, at this point in the series, he has seen Morgan once on their not-double-date.
"This is just annoying because I can't miss my romantic weekend, but I really can't miss this dinner because clearly Morgan can't do it alone."
And here we have the words that have been beaten into her head over and over. Where Sasha knows that he isn't helpful or wanted (not good enough), Morgan has been told she isn't capable (not good enough).
"We're just in that, like, have to spend every single second together stage." "Yeah, Esther and I are there, too. More of a legal thing, though."
It's so sterile when he talks about Esther. Not in a derogatory way, but truly these are two people who are in a routine that isn't exciting or engaging. And they've both accepted that this is just the way it is.
For some people, a routine like that is comforting. For some, it's suffocating. And I get the impression that Esther is all about organizing and planning while Sasha would like to be a bit more free.
Now, this can work in the real world. But as the only non-ADHD member of my 5 person family, I can tell you it takes a lot of work and communication.
"You're great with powerful guys." "No, he's married." "Fuck!"
And this is where my whole "no married" theory with Morgan comes from. She's a gal who is confident in her sexuality, down for a hookup, but we also know that she was once in a committed, married relationship.
And everything in this show gives me the impression she doesn't fuck with married guys.
"Morgan, you cannot handle the entire podcast decision by-"
And, there it is, again. "You can't".
"Sasha can let her into my place. I'll text him."
So, at this point we know that Sasha and Morgan haven't exchanged numbers. I mean, when would they have done it, right? When he was rushing out to the car so his wife would stop honking and screaming?
But my bet is that this next scene is where they exchange numbers. And from his point of view, it's a completely practical thing—Morgan can't decide if she should take the laptop with her or leave it there (since Joanne will be returning to Noah's and it would be an extra trip to get it back from Morgan), and Sasha offers his number so she can text him if she needs to get back in.
Like, it is totally something I can see him doing. And then he has her text him right then so she's in his phone because he likes to fuck with scammers. I think that would charm her, honestly, and so she gives him her number... for practical purposes, of course.
But, I'm getting ahead of myself.
"Thank you. Thank you. Oh my God."
Morgan is so overwhelmed that she forgets to be snarky with Sasha. He does this little hand flip when he hands her things (check out the drink in the season finale), but it caught my eye immediately here. I just thought it was a fun quirk.
As she steps past him to the couch, his brow furrows as he listens to her.
"You know, I've got a guy who could wipe that in, like, an hour."
Where Sasha is afraid to offer his daughter help, and doesn't even attempt to offer his wife help, he is open with Morgan.
There's a selflessness she brings out in him, even here. He genuinely wants to help, and he doesn't think she'll immediately dismiss him.
"... my sister's ditching our work dinner to have sex with your stupid brother."
There's a beat here where he leans down to get his coffee and then stands back, still giving her space. It reminds me of how he stood to the side of her at the bar that one night. He didn't encroach on her space, didn't hover behind her, but simply wanted to be there in the moment with other people.
It wasn't a sexual or romantic thing, but just a person who wanted to be with other people, but without invading boundaries.
The last time he tried to sit near her, she got up and ran away. So, I get why he is a bit cautious, here, giving her space.
"Now the big boss guy is coming and I'm kinda freaking out because I need to show people I can do this alone."
Something in that breaks down a wall for Sasha. He crosses over and sits down on the couch with her, a full cushion separating them.
"Oh, I get it. You're the loser sibling."
That doesn't sit too well with Morgan. And if he hadn't jumped in so fast to respond, she might have been offended.
"What?" "And no judgment. I'm the loser sibling. I mean, it's hard to compete when your brother's the Jewish Jesus."
And then she gets it. It's not about "awful". It's about having this super, impossibly pedastled sibling to which everything you do is compared.
Morgan coughs out a laugh as she says, "Yeah". She gets it. She understands it. And this is probably the first moment where she understands Sasha.
Let's be real, she was ready to be offended over the "loser sibling" comment. But to see that he sees himself as one and the parameters are basically "compared to Jesus", it becomes super hard to be offended.
"It doesn't make as much sense with you, though."
And her reaction as he actually says things that coming from anyone else would totally be flirting is completely different from their first interaction.
But, also, she is in a really different place, emotionally. At their first meeting, Sasha was the interloper and she was already on-edge with her sister. This time, she is anxious and vulnerable. She needs him, and he helped her without hesitation.
But as he lists off her virtues, she softens. She smiles. She laughs.
And I think part of it is knowing this guy is married, is not remotely trying to hit on her or get anything out of her, and he's actually the one helping her out here.
Morgan saw in their first interaction that Sasha is totally stream-of-consciousness. He says what he's thinking. And, as we'll later see at the first basketball game Joanne attends, he's a little bit of a natural flirt.
Sasha is more of a people-person than he allows himself to remember. He likes talking to people. He likes being with other people. Yes, he can be alone, but he's one of those people who doesn't want to be alone all the time.
He's not looking for anything here with Morgan. Not a romance. Not a friendship. Nothing.
But what he's finding is an unexpected moment of connection. And I don't think how much either of them realizes they lack that in so much of their lives.
"And you're way hotter than your sister. I mean, she's too short." "Finally, somebody gets it, right? So short."
This is what allows her to move on. Shifting the conversation from her to her sister helps her re-focus on what she's supposed to be doing and she looks back to the screen.
It isn't long before Sasha wants to share something else helpful. I mean, the guy likes to help. It's hard-coded into him.
Just look at the apples in the Season Finale. He doesn't mind being the one on his knees in a good suit picking fruit up off the floor so everyone else can have a good time.
And he honestly wants to help Morgan. This isn't romantic. This isn't a seduction technique. This is literally Sasha just being Sasha.
"Everything in life is a hostage situation." "Okay..."
I love this. She is still flabbergasted by him. She still doesn't know what to make of him. But, she isn't outright dismissing him.
I do think a lot of it has to do with her mentality. When she first met Sasha and Noah, she was worried about her sister, in a bad mood, and stressed. Adding in the brothers was adding to her stress.
But in this episode, Sasha and Noah are the ones who are helping her, here. Noah reached out to Sasha, and Sasha is the one who actually get her in.
And while she's not sure where he's going with this, she's willing to hear him out.
"Holy shit, you're so good at that." "Thank you. It was a great tip."
And here we have the second positive memory in about two minutes associated with Sasha. First, he got her the laptop. Now, he's giving her tips to get through this meeting that's been stressing her out.
And having him affirm that she's "good at that" is exactly what she needs in the moment.
There's this episode of Quantum Leap (the original series with Scott Bakula) that comes to mind over and over for me. It's an episode where Sam leaps into a person who is mentally disabled.
And Sam, genius though he is, finds himself making mistake after mistake because everyone treats him like he is a buffoon. They treat him like he can't do anything right. And it says so much about how we see ourselves because of how others see us.
I wrote about a similar moment of realization in an episode of The Librarians where Jake talked about how people expected that he couldn't do things, so he started to believe he couldn't.
Both Morgan and Sasha know what it's like to have everyone expect them to drop the ball, to mess it up, to fall apart. And it sucks, because we learn through the course of the series that they are both very capable human beings who excel in their lines of work.
But the people around them enforce the idea that they aren't good enough. And that shit seeps into your pores and into your soul and it's hard to unstick.
In this moment, Sasha gets to help and Morgan gets to feel capable.
"Thank you for the tip. No, that doesn't work." "No, not as good."
He misspeaks. But this time is so different compared to any other time he misspoke or said something that didn't quite land. She isn't annoyed with him. Instead, she agrees with him that, yeah, that wasn't your best. And they move on.
He's growing on her. Not in a romantic way, but in a friendly way. And, as we'll later learn, that's untested waters for Morgan.
And this scene is less than two minutes long. Now, this isn't unusual in terms of scenes, but it's pretty remarkable that we witnessed the two of them bonding in less than two minutes.
All it took was Morgan being receptive toward Sasha. Not in a romantic way, but as a person.
"You were born in Canada?"
I love how smoothly she does is. She uses the tip from Sasha, and it actually works to help get the meeting started. And thus Sasha is associated with endorphins for Morgan.
Look, I'm not saying that at this second she starts to crave him carnally. All I'm saying is that little things build up over time, and though he is not mentioned in this scene, his influence is here and Morgan is certainly thinking a little about him, maybe wanting to thank him, again, for the tip.
"Hey, Zaddy. What's your job title?" "World's greatest lover." "Oh, I wish."
This whole interaction is so subtle and so heartbreaking for me. Yes, of course, there's her declaration that he isn't the world's greatest lover, but that doesn't bother me as much as the physical bits of his scene.
Look, some couples throw barbs. Sometimes Matt and I do! It's part of our dynamic that folks on the outside might not get. But what aches in this moment is how Sasha plants a kiss on his wife's head and she immediately smooths her hair back.
Sasha is something she needs to smooth away, in that moment. He displaced something in her that she needs to get back into place.
And I think the weight of expectation and perfection is heavy on Esther. I think that, more than anything, is what locks her into her Season 1 base personality.
Everyone starts somewhere and needs room to grow, and not everyone is going to grow at the same rate through the course of a season.
Joanne is our proxy in the world and she has the most growth to do as a person throughout the season. Noah is pretty static through season 1 besides the huge leap in the finale. Sasha and Morgan both have subtle growth. For Esther, I think we've planted the seeds of growth that can be explored more in Season 2.
But we all start somewhere. And Esther obviously still craves the approval of her mother-in-law, wants to have the perfect little life and family, and has that "good life" Noah's dad told him he could have if he married Rebecca.
I feel like Sasha and Esther have been "comfortable", but I really think she'd be happier with Rebecca. Oh, yes, I went there. Headcannon achived!
"Looks like you're on your way to the shvitz." "You know I hate the shvitz."
It's the only time I really see him look angry in this whole show. He is going to do what she says, because he always does what she says, but he doesn't want to.
And, yes, this leads to him getting the promotion. He stood up for himself, and that was good, and that was Esther pushing him.
I don't want it to ever seem like I am hating on Esther. I simply don't think they're a great match and that they want different things. But she does have her moments.
*Dipping in the water*
I just find it interesting that the episode where Sasha has to get into a pool he doesn't want to has Morgan dipping her toes into another.
It may mean absolutely nothing, but it's a television show and I'm going to dissect it all because this is how a gal who works alone from home every day and barely gets to have fun keeps from going mad.
*phone beep*
Joanne stops the recording and runs off to pee as Morgan's phone dings. She picks it up to see a message from Sasha: "Loser sibling alert."
She coughs out a short laugh as she responds, "Once again, I am not the loser sibling."
In seconds, the response comes in, "Me neither, cus I got a fuckin promotion"
A smile flutters across her lips as she rolls her eyes slightly. But then she leans forward, chuckling to herself.
And, oh shit, we are headed into dangerous territory. Remember, Bina had a key to her son's apartment for emergencies only. We can say that Sasha and Morgan exchanged numbers for completely practical, non-romantic reasons.
But this is a life update. This is something exciting for Sasha, and he wants to make sure Morgan knows about it. Morgan.
Obviously, Esther will know, as she's the one who pushed him to ask for more by shoving him toward his father. But Sasha wants Morgan to know about his life.
In the moment, he probably thinks it will encourage her as much as it excites him—that the loser siblings can still do well and accomplish things. But this opens a door that probably should've stayed shut.
We don't know if they've been texting before this. We're not privy to that part of their lives because then the show would be 24 hours long and a long succession of bathroom breaks.
But we know that when he texts her, her fingers hesitate over the screen as she considers how to respond. A dozen expressions flash across her face before she leans forward, leaning into this thing, with a smile.
And, at this point, neither of them are thinking anything romantic. But Morgan is well aware that this is outside her norm, even if it's not outside his. She doesn't usually text with married men.
Hell, since she finds most of her dates on apps, she likely isn't texting with unmarried men, either!
And I find it interesting that we started the episode with Morgan in hookup world and end it with genuine connection.
Look, no judgment, here! But themes like that are rarely accidental. Maybe since her husband she hasn't been looking for something that serious. We don't really know. We still have a lot to learn about Morgan.
But we're learning that she does like connection.
"Did you know that tall people die earlier than everybody else? So, enjoy me while I last."
I want to point this out because on the surface this definitely feels flirty. But, he is saying it to his brother's girlfriend, who he has no intention of ever trying anything with.
Sasha is just a little flirty. He's one of those guys.
And, look, being around theater people my whole life, I know these people! They don't mean anything by it, and Joanne clearly knows that. I think it adds a lens to how we view Morgan and Sasha because if he does come off flirty with her, it's likely unintentional.
"Hey, we're gonna head out for some victory drinks. You wanna go?"
He directs this to Joanne. Again, he is just that flirty, friendly, wants everyone to have a good time guy. He always sees everything as an open invitation to others, so I can see why he tends to read everything as an open invitation to himself.
Now, is that a bit problematic at times? Of course. The basis of his early interactions with Morgan is unease because he invites himself along on a date.
But part of Sasha's makeup is his openness.
"Wait... I have something insane to tell you."
Joanne's called Morgan to talk about the WAGs and her failure to connect, but even in the midst of her sister's spiral, Morgan needs to get something off of her chest.
And she has to tell her sister because she really can't tell anyone else.
"Wait. Wait. Are you ready to hear the insane thing I have to tell you? Okay, so, this is very weird and, um, kind of confusing, but I had a sex dream about the brother."
This is unfathomable. Morgan was so repulsed by him when they first met, and though she's warmed up to him, he is so not her type.
For a gal who is accustomed to more physical-based relationships, it's completely throwing her for a loop that she's having a sex dream about a guy she's never touched, and under normal circumstances wouldn't even consider touching.
She can't even say his name. In episode two when she texted Joanne in the car, she called him "the brother" and we know from the podcast where they nickname Noah "the prophet" that these kind of code names are normal for them.
But Joanne can say it.
"You had a sex dream about Sasha?"
She's incredulous. Now, sex dreams are not always indicative of anything at all. Let's be real. Some sex dreams are just dreams that are completely meaningless.
But this is a television series. Rarely is a sex dream meaningless.
Now, in the moment, Joanne is going to dismiss this and move on. She's more excited about how uncomfortable her sister is and doing that sisterly thing of delighting in Morgan's pain.
But depending on how they take the Loser Siblings dynamic down the line, Joanne is so gonna remember this moment.
"Yes. Yes. It's gross, right?"
She wants so badly for Joanne to tell her that. She wants to know that this is one of those completely meaningless sex dreams that she can just write off and never think about, again. But Joanne is speechless.
"Like, I don't get it. I'm not even attracted to him."
This one makes me chuckle. Because, I'm a demisexual with a hard ace lean. So, feeling sexual attraction for me is just not a real thing. I can feel romantic attraction and understand the appeal of sexual attraction.
But I wonder if Morgan is used to letting her sexual attraction lead her and doesn't realize that she actually has an emotional attraction to this guy.
I mean, just look at the way she was so soft with him in the laptop scene. He complimented her and she absorbed every one. But he also helped her, and offered her even more help, and she let him help her. They bonded.
I wonder if she's ever bonded with a guy emotionally before sleeping with them, before. And, no judgment! But I think that could be part of her block when it comes to understanding why she might be dreaming about "the brother" that way.
When Joanne doesn't say what she needs to hear, "Oh, that's weird. That's gross. So stupid!" she bounces off the call. She doesn't want to hear anything other than that because she can not be into "the brother".
"Oh, hi boys. Nice costumes."
Morgan looks to Sasha as she finishes the line, coughing a laugh. And, let's be honest, his neon yellow is a bit garish, but totally on brand for a character that constantly wears loud clothes to go for that.
Also, it makes sense that Morgan is trying to distance herself from thinking about him sexually by searing the image of him in that outfit in her brain.
And, oh! The. Framing. The framing! When they first cut back to the guys, it's the wide shot of everyone. But after the second half of the above quote, it's centered and focused on Sasha. Sasha is the one the camera focuses on as he looks at her.
Once he passes the ball off, he goes to greet her. Now, he's definitely standing a little too close. But they've connected and he feels less need to keep distance between them. I don't even think he realizes he's doing it.
He truly doesn't see anything but friendship in this relationship, and I'm not even sure he sees that at this point considering their conversation later in the episode. He's just not thinking it.
Morgan, though, fresh off a sex dream about him is very aware of how close he is to her.
It's not that she plans to do anything about that dream. But it's right there and he's right there, and that's a little too much Sasha near Morgan at this particular moment. She needs to purge the dream from her system, and having him so close does not make it easy.
"There he is."
One thing that really stood out to me on rewatch was how all the WAGs greeted their significant others. Drunk Joanne leapt into Noah's arms, of course. But if you look in the background, all the other WAGs embrace their significant others.
All except... Esther.
She doesn't even TOUCH him when she approaches him, and he doesn't seek it. He does seek emotional connection, though.
He asks if she wants to go out with him to eat spicy food (to take advantage of the fact that he is already sweating), but she turns him down to go be with Rebecca.
To note, this is at least the second time he has tried to connect with her (last time for a make-up sex night, this time just to go out together) and she has pushed him aside for Rebecca.
And this pushes him toward Morgan.
Think about it. If he'd left right then with his wife, they wouldn't have even seen Morgan loitering around looking for a ride. In a different type of show, this would've been the last time any of them saw Morgan alive. Yes, I know my mind's a little dark.
Instead, Sasha is shuffling alone when he runs into a super intoxicated Morgan who is still a little jumpy about him being too close to her.
"See. I'm telling you. We're the loser siblings. Think they'd forget about you if you were the winner sibling?" "Just stop with that."
And here he is looking for connection, again. And, at first, Morgan rebuffs him. She's still rejecting the Loser Sibling label, which is, to a degree, rejecting Sasha. It's not vindictive or cruel. She simply isn't looking for connection the way he is.
He longs for connection. She needs it more than she knows. That's why their combination is so damn dangerous.
In her, he finds someone who laughs (sometimes with him, sometimes at him), who lets him help and doesn't make him feel like a loser while he does.
In him, she finds a guy who doesn't expect anything of her. He offers of himself with no expectation of return. In that selflessness, she recognizes a softness in him that brings out a softness in her.
Neither of them is looking for love. Neither of them is looking for an affair. What they are both truly in want of is connection. Yes, they have their siblings, but in each other they find someone who truly gets it.
And I feel like some dialogue got cut here. It reads just fine the way it's edited together, but I'm wondering if the Uber would take a half hour or something. That seems like something Morgan would comment on while looking at her phone.
I just feel like a little something's been cut and I could be way off, but it throws me every time I watch the scene. Like, it actually pulls me out.
But, let's be real, most folks watching this aren't people who grew up on film sets, was an actress, the daughter of a makeup artist, and a film minor in college with two degrees in communications. I have no idea how to watch something normally.
I ruined one of Matt's favorite scenes in Raiders of the Lost Ark the first time we watched it together. I still feel bad about that one.
"Well, I'll give you a ride." "Why?"
And this is another clue that makes me think Morgan has never gone the "Friends to lovers" route with a guy. She absolutely expects him to want something from her. She doesn't expect him to do this because it's a nice thing to do.
I mean, note how she looks to his lips before meeting his eyes. She full on understands a world of sexual favors and unspoken expectations. But Sasha truly has none. He honestly just wants to help.
At every turn, he wants to help her. He helped her with getting into his brother's place to get the laptop. He helped her with the hostage negotiator tip. He's helping her by giving her a ride.
He truly likes to help. He just knows that those closest to him always expect him to be a screw up. With Morgan, he gets to be the hero. And I don't think he even fully realizes it, yet.
She crosses her arms over her chest as she waits for his response—a defensive move. And, honestly, I love every choice Ms. Lupe makes in this whole sequence because we can see Morgan's discomfort and distrust.
She's wrestling with wanting to believe he's being honest and selfless, but she just can't trust it.
"Because it's a nice thing to do and you need one."
That's it. It's as simple as that. It's the nice thing to do. Morgan uncrosses her arms (off camera, but it happens) as she accepts the ride.
"So, just so you know, we're gonna listen to my music, and I've been in a, like, Kris Kross phase."
The only reason I left this in is because once we get to the scene of them pulling up to the house... there is no music. My bet is that once they got into the car they started talking and just never stopped.
Also, once they pull up, he's wearing a hooded sweatshirt over his basketball clothes (yes, I know this is the real world and likely the actor isn't actually wearing all that underneath, but let's just go with the story here, people).
Note the biggest detail—he's no longer sweaty. He invited Esther out for spicy food "because he was already sweating". When he offered to give Morgan the ride, he didn't just take a detour on his plans—he changed them entirely.
Because it was never about the spicy food. It was about that want for connection. Sasha wanted to go out with his wife, but she had other plans.
So, instead of sitting across from Esther at a table eating spicy food and connecting, he's sitting next to Morgan in the car... connecting.
*Morgan laughs* "So dumb." "It's pretty dumb. Thank you, though. Thank you for laughing."
This. Is. Important. Look at how they are just laughing and relaxing together. I know we have no idea what they are talking about, but we don't need to. Those two lines are about the vibes of the Loser Siblings dynamic.
They are relaxed around one another. Where he once really annoyed her, now he makes her laugh. And he gets pleasure out of making her laugh. He laughs with her because it is so nice just to laugh with someone.
And maybe I'm biased, but that is one of my favorite things in a relationship—laughing together. Matthew and I have been through a lot in our 17 years of marriage (oh, gosh, has it been that long!?). But laughter is our biggest point of connection.
That and being positively ridiculous together. What other couple do you know who works the Swedish Chef into their goodnights?
"Haven't you ever had, like, a guy friend give you a ride home?"
And, while Sasha is trying really hard not to see anything weird about his and Morgan's dynamic, he's basically confirming my suspicions. Morgan doesn't do "guy friends". She just doesn't have that mode. And this is all new for her.
"But we're friends."
His reaction to this is so telling. He just realized that the only girl friend he has in his life is the woman he married who ran off all his other women friends.
My mom once dated a guy for three years. They ended amicably and stayed friends. Welp, once he married, his new wife made him mail my mother every photo of them.
Like, she couldn't just toss them, but had to go through the extra knife in the chest of sending them back to the ex, including all the pictures of me and my brother with him. So, I know these types of women.
And Sasha wants to be friends with Morgan (because what else can he be, right?), but he's sort of realizing that in being her friend and putting that label on it, he's risking Esther finding out and shutting it down.
For me, this is when it gets fuzzy for him. Morgan is already sex dreaming about him and giggling to herself about his text messages. Sasha's a little more oblivious in an adorable way.
But watch his face as he's considering a friendship with Morgan. This is when it goes from something that snuck up on him to something that he is going to actively keep from his wife. Because he's enjoying this friendship with Morgan.
To be clear, he has zero thoughts at this point of it going any further. He truly wants to be her friend. But some part of him knows this is forbidden territory, even if he isn't technically cheating.
Morgan, however, is relieved to have the "Friend" label out there. Labels are easy and they help her distance and protect herself. So, calling "the brother" her "friend" helps her distance from her subconscious that wants more.
"Well, thank you friend for the ride home." "You're welcome."
He's still mulling over the meaning of what just happened as she gets out of the car, flashing two birds at him as she goes.
"Two stars. Bye!" "Thank you. That's gonna bring up my star rating to two."
Where he runs from Esther or changes the topic with her, he bites back a little at Morgan, and I love that. He isn't running from her bitchy farewell (which is clearly another layer of protection for herself), but instead snarks back. More and more, he can be himself with her.
And it's all happening so gradually that they don't really see it coming.
He probably goes straight home after this, and later Esther will ask about the spicy food he ate, and that will become either the first skirting the topic (say he changed his mind) or outright lie (it was delicious!).
"Babe, I love you. You're my queen, but I have committed to being super hyped on tonight, so even if it feels like a betrayal, you're on your own."
Why include this? Because, once again, he is uncomfortably honest with Esther. But, also, it is one of the very few times we see him choosing anything over her. Here, he has made a commitment to his brother, and he is going to see it through.
Back in Episode 2 we saw him choose his brother over Esther when he lied about "shutting down" the "shiksa thing". Noah said, "Don't tell Esther" and Sasha responded, "I'm not gonna tell Esther". So, we know that these two have kept things from Esther before.
Siblings can be gray areas on those things. I have siblings with varying degrees of closeness (family is complicated, right!?) but there are some things you just keep between you—like spilling an entire gallon of sweet tea on the kitchen floor in the middle of the night when you shouldn't have been making tea in the first place.
We told Mom years later... when she had mellowed... a lot.
But, back to the honesty bit, this is another reason why I think his friendship with Morgan is such a shock to Esther when she finds out later. Sasha keeping things from her that extend to Noah isn't a shock. They're brothers. Brothers have bonds.
But Sasha is a very open person, on the surface. Yes, in episode three he talked behind Esther's back, "Breaking up the family?! What the fuck!? I'm sorry" to Noah. But, Esther doesn't realize that. He is so open and honest with her about so many things that she doesn't think he would keep a secret like that.
Yes, he went out with Morgan in episode two, but he didn't know it when he lied to Esther in the Temple. He was just going to meet the girl his brother was crushing on, so he thought. So, that is still a brother-protecting-brother thing. This moment? Another brother-protecting-brother thing.
These moments make sense to Esther. Her husband of probably 15 years having a secret woman friend? Yeah, nowhere near her radar.
"You know, I wanted to go elastic, but Esther wouldn't let me." "Honey, your sweats are gross."
This reminds me of the Rebecca and Noah first scene where she wanted plates and he wanted to just eat out of the container. And, of course, life has those little moments of disagreement.
But this is a television show. Almost everything has meaning.
Likely, Sasha is just saying it because he's sweet and wants to show solidarity. But, we also know that he does like to wear his sweats. We see him wearing several different hooded sweat shirts at Noah's. He wears the sweatshirt in the car with Morgan. He wears sweats when he's home alone on the couch. He's comfortable in Sweats.
What Esther is saying here is that Sweats in general are gross. There's no clarification about whether or not they're clean—it's just another thing Sasha likes and feels comfortable in that is a no-go for Esther.
"Hey, what's up?"
Sasha is sneaking into a freakin' bathroom to have a conversation with Morgan. This dude is not stupid.
I've seen some people say, "Oh, yeah, Sasha is totally clueless", and while I think he is to a degree during the season, by this point he knows he is is actively making a choice to hide Morgan from Esther.
So, yeah, I think he is fully aware that lines are getting blurred, here, but since he has zero intention of going physical and doesn't seem to understand an emotional affair anymore than Morgan, he thinks he is in the clear as long as he's not found out.
But what also sticks out is his face. Looking for Esther, he's nervous. But as soon as he sees Morgan's face, his brightens. He has no idea why she's calling, but he's happy to see her.
And can we talk about the fact that this is built into the episode description?! "Morgan asks Sasha for a favor".
There are only two episodes where these two make the description, and both of them are moments that move their relationship forward—in episode 5 when they bond over sibling dynamics, and here, when she calls him for the first time.
"I just haven't told Esther that we're friends, yet."
Because everyone involved knows this is over when you do. Yes, Morgan and Sasha have been living in this little, private bubble where nobody knew about their friendship but them.
Morgan didn't even tell Joanne. Sasha didn't even tell Noah.
Their best friends in the world—who also happen to be their siblings—have no idea that they are texting and chatting and becoming friends.
Morgan told Joanne about the sex dream, sure, but that's because she wanted validation that it was an anomaly and weird. She never said she was also texting with this guy.
I mean, hello, how much more cheating-coded can it be without them laying a finger on one another?!
"If I tell you something I need you to swear on your life you're never going to repeat it to anyone. Okay? Not Noah. Not Esther. Nobody." "100%. I just need to let you know I've never actually successfully kept a secret before. So, keep that in mind before you tell me."
He's protecting her. He's being honest with her. He doesn't want to let her down.
Yes, he annoyed the shit out of her the first time they met. But since then, he has a good track record of being helpful. He helped her with the laptop, with the mirroring, with the ride home.
And we know from the Season Finale that before this phone call he tipped her off to the best tacos in LA. He helped her, again!
But this is something he knows he could fuck up. And he's worried he'll fuck it up. And he wants her to know upfront that he might fuck it up.
But Morgan decides to trust him anyway.
"So, I ran into Rebecca last week." "Oh, okay, that is juicy."
Think about this objectively. Rebecca is his wife's best friend. He knows Rebecca. He knew Rebecca as his brother's girlfriend for three years.
He's probably known Rebecca forever, and yet he's about to take on this task for Morgan to help her.
Again, these two haven't laid a finger on each other, but this is where Sasha knows he's in the grey area (even if he wants to pretend he's not) and is in a position to continually choose Morgan over the other people in his life.
But, we'll get back to that.
"He tells me everything. I'm like his Rabbi."
Listen to that little bit of pride in his voice! But as he's talking to his friend who he has not told his brother about, he waivers on his certainty.
"Although, wait, what if he's hiding that from me?"
Because, my friend, you are certainly hiding something involving a girl from him.
"Yeah, I don't know, but you need to get to the bottom of it, okay? And just let me know what you find out."
There's something so casual about this, but it's another step in their relationship they probably don't realize they're making. Morgan is asking for help.
Think about it. When Sasha let Morgan into Noah's place, that was because Noah texted him asking for help. The mirroring tip was just something Sasha freely gave. Then, Sasha offered her the ride.
I've mentioned a few times that I think Morgan is well-acquainted with transactional relationships. But her relationship with Sasha is different. He doesn't ask for anything in return.
Still, she hasn't asked him for anything—until now. This is the first time she actively asks him for something. And he really doesn't want to fuck it up.
"I'm sorry. Why would I mention your name? "I don't know. It's just, you said it and it felt like I should say it back." "Okay. Bye. Thanks, weirdo."
Again, he misspoke. And she called him out on it. But she isn't upset. She understands this is one of his quirks. But, also, she still isn't calling him by name.
Names are special. I mean, X-Files knew it or they wouldn't have been specific and intentional about when Mulder and Scully called one another by their first names.
And while she also once calls her sister "weirdo" (see next episode) the "weird" label is definitely one she associates with her and Sasha. It is weird. There's no denying it from her point of view! But she doesn't want to stop it. And neither does he.
Again, neither of them see this as an affair. Neither of them see this as cheating. But they both are also aware that this is outside the norm.
But, then, how do you define it? Do they realize they're crossing these lines? It's so hard to say.
One thing's for sure—Sasha is no fool. Not only does he flush the toilet, but he runs the water after. He might be a bit of a buffoon, but he isn't an idiot.
He knows he shouldn't be talking to Morgan like this. He knows Esther would shut it down if she knew. But he isn't in it for sex or romance—he yearns for connection. And he's finding it where he shouldn't.
"I didn't hear it in a real sense of hearing..."
I'm not putting the whole thing, but you know the scene. When he tries to surreptitiously ask Esther about the whole Rebecca thing.
In the moment, it's read as Sasha just being Sasha—a little weird. But later, Esther is going to look back on this interaction and realize he "heard" it from the tall sister.
"Babe, you know what's actually really funny? Okay. Rebecca saw the dumb sister, pretending not to know who she was, then told her just like a bunch of lies about her and Noah just to fuck with her. It's amazing." "My God, women are scary."
So much to break down. First off, Esther calling Morgan, "the dumb sister". That's gotta sting for Sasha because he knows what it's like to be the Loser Sibling and have everyone expect less of you. He and Morgan share that, so there's a ping of sympathy for Morgan.
Then, he sees his wife's absolute glee at this fuckery. Like, I get that you don't like that life didn't go the way you perfectly planned it, but what the fuck, lady!?
"You need to promise me you are not gonna repeat that." "Yeah. No, no, no. Of course not. That's just, like, really juicy information that people would kill for and I'm just not gonna do anything with it or tell anybody."
Watch his face when she leaves. He was asked by Morgan to dig into this. She swore him to secrecy. Now, he has the answer, but his wife has sworn him to secrecy.
And in this moment, he chooses Esther. He does! He makes the choice to say nothing to Morgan because his wife swore him to secrecy.
Note how he doesn't warn her that he can't keep a secret. He just tells her he'll keep it, and then wrestles with it—because now he has failed Morgan.
To keep his wife's secret, he failed to help Morgan. Honestly, either way he chooses, he loses in some way.
"Text your sister. See if she'll come to dinner with us." "No." "Come on. I hate that you're in a fight."
That gets Sasha's attention. He literally backs up to join the conversation and Noah's head swivels up to him like, "What the hell?"
But Sasha being Sasha has its advantages, and this is one of those moments. Neither of them question why he wants to nose into their business. It's just Sasha being Sasha, right?
"What are you guys fighting about?" "Nothing. She's just a lying bitch who's trying to get in between me and my bubbeleh."
That same pained expression that crossed his face when he learned the truth briefly flashes across his features. He didn't know why Morgan was asking him for the information before, but now he knows that Rebecca's lies are actively doing damage.
"How do you know Morgan's lying?"
That's the first time I recall him saying her name.
See, Sasha distances the same way that Morgan does—with nicknames or placeholders. It's one of those places where they're alike and don't even realize it.
Names have intimacy attached to them. And though he doesn't realize it, he's crossed into a form of intimacy with Morgan.
They have their own inside jokes, memories, and now secrets. Those little things are what builds the strands of connection and strengthen them.
"If you knew the situation, you would get it."
And the crazy thing is that he knows more than either Noah or Joanne about it. Hell, he knows more than Morgan at this point.
"Okay. Well, I don't."
Because... what can he say? To any of them? He chose Esther, and that's the end of it.
"What does Morgan think about all this? I mean, is she cool with Joanne tribing up?" "I don't know, man. They're still fighting."
It's been days. At least days. Sasha has been sitting on this information, and now he knows that the sisters are still fighting.
And much as he chose Esther in the moment, that resolve is wearing thin. Because this isn't some little tiff.
He knows that Morgan ran into Rebecca a week before she called him. He knows they were fighting when Joanne came for lunch. They're still fighting.
And much as he wouldn't admit that he cares about Morgan, he does. He cares. Someone he cares about is being hurt—and he can help stop that hurt.
Sasha tries to unload his burdens with his brother, to tell him the truth. But Noah rebuffs the older sibling not even knowing what he's rejecting.
And, look, no judgment on Noah for not engaging in gossip (though he totally did with Joanne's friends about Amanda). Gossip is frickin' dangerous.
But secrets between the brothers are not new. We've seen it time and time, again. These two talk, and it's pretty assured that Esther would forgive Sasha for telling Noah if she ever figured it out because Sasha could redirect her ire to his brother.
Sasha could have told him everything and then let him tell Joanne and let her tell Morgan. That way, he wouldn't be directly betraying his wife. But, it doesn't work out that way.
And, again, Sasha is pushed toward Morgan.
He needs to talk, and there are only a few people in this world he talks to. I mean really talks to. Yes, he plays basketball with "the guys", but when it comes to hanging out, it's really only with his little brother. He talks to his wife, but that's its own thing.
But the only way to get rid of this burden is to tell Morgan. So, he does it. He makes the active choice to call her and break Esther's trust.
"Care to tell me why Sasha's calling you? ... Morgan, what did you do!?"
What does she think her sister did!? Like, last Joanne knew her sister was having sex dreams about her boyfriend's brother, but that was ages back and she has no idea that they are friends.
Like, I've thought it through a lot and I'm not exactly sure what Joanne thinks her sister did, here. And it does play into that "Morgan always fucks it up and I have to fix it" mentality that Joanne has about her sister.
But, do you know what is super fun? Watching Joanne's expressions during the phone call. When Morgan picks up, she's waiting for the shoe to drop—for something to be wrong.
"Hi, Sasha. Why are you calling? We barely know each other."
Babe, who do you think you are fooling with that bullshit? Anyway...
"Okay, look, I have something to tell you-"
Inserting my own break here just for Joanne's face. Look how she pulls her head back. Girlfriend is concerned about what is about to come out of that phone.
"I'm not used to keeping secrets, but I need some sweet release from these chains." "Alright, well, now is not a good time, so-"
Honey, what do you think he was going to say? Because, clearly you were trying to protect him from your sister. Maybe trying to protect yourself, too!
Like, she doesn't know what the secret is. But in that moment, she actually tried to choose Sasha over Joanne. It's a brief thing. It's barely there. But, she was trying to protect Sasha no matter what the secret was.
Those little things keep adding up... keep strengthening their bond.
"Rebecca lied. You were compromised the entire time. She knew who you were and she just wanted to mess with Noah and Joanne. Nothing she said was true."
Morgan's posture completely changes when she knows what the secret is, and Joanne has her light bulb moment as she gets to hear from someone else's mouth that her sister was telling the truth.
And, can we talk for a second here about how it had to be the Loser Siblings rescuing themselves, here? Sasha tried to tell Noah and get him to be the savior. Joanne wouldn't listen to Morgan. But Sasha really saves the day.
"Oh my God, that felt so good."
Alright, there, Sasha. Keep it in your pants.
"Look, I gotta go. Don't tell Esther I told you."
He gets that sweet release he needs, so now there's another endorphin response associated with Morgan subconsciously. And he made the choice of Morgan over Esther.
Yup. In the immortal words of Whoopi Goldberg: "Girl. You in danger."
Also, can we please talk about the timing of all this?! He is at his daughter's Bat Mitzvah! The ceremony probably just wrapped up and they are headed to the reception.
No doubt, Sasha sees his brother despondent because his girlfriend didn't show. He knows that Morgan and Joanne are still fighting. And he's powerless to do anything about his daughter's ridiculous Bat Mitzvah theme that is universally hated.
He doesn't know that making that call will bring Joanne to the party. He doesn't know he is also helping his brother out when he makes that call. But he knows it will help Morgan.
So he steals a moment between the ceremony and the reception to call her.
He rushes through the truth, partially because he wants to get it off his chest, but partially because he is pushing his luck making this phone call at all. He is with his entire family and can't risk anyone catching him.
This is another place where we see his thought process on display—he doesn't video call. It's audio only, and he doesn't use her name. Our boy is not stupid and not clueless.
And then he tells Morgan not to tell Esther he told her.
Now, Morgan and he have another secret from Esther, but this time Joanne bore witness. So, any worries she might've had about Sasha and Morgan having an active affair were put to bed (heh), but she definitely still thinks it's weird the two are talking.
"Why does Sasha have your phone number?" "We can circle back to that."
Because it's complicated. Again, I think the simple answer: "We exchanged phone numbers when you were boinking your boyfriend and blowing off business" is likely the complete factual answer.
But Morgan is still on full-on avoidance when it comes to her feelings for Sasha, whatever they are. And she doesn't want to talk about Sasha because then she has to think about Sasha.
And then she just might have to be honest with herself about Sasha.
Morgan is still going on dates. Sasha is still with his wife. Again, they don't think they've crossed any lines, here. But all it takes is one outsider looking in to burst that bubble.
Where before Morgan wanted Joanne to break a Sasha bubble, now she doesn't want that. Because what she has with Sasha is different than anything she's ever had with anyone else—whatever it is.
"Okay, so the real question is, is this bitch Rebecca really trying to break you guys up?" "Yeah. Everyone is. And they're all together at a Bat Mitzvah." "Then what the fuck are we doing here?"
And this is Morgan at her best. We've seen her at her worst—sniping and battling her sister, getting in her head about Noah. But this? This is Morgan at her best.
When Joanne is drowning with the WAGs, Morgan shows up. When Joanne needed rescues from bad dates, Morgan shows up. When Joanne second guesses staying outside the Temple, Morgan shows up. Even though Morgan was so frustrated with Sasha that first hang, she still plays her part to be her sister's wingwoman.
Morgan talks a lot of shit. Morgan can totally get it wrong. But when it matters—Morgan shows up.
In Episode 1 Joanne told Noah that Morgan was her best friend and worst enemy (to which he responded he had one of those in Sasha). Now, we see it on full display.
"I hate this dress."
Miriam tumbles in the dress she hates so much, and Esther is right there to help. She really is a good mom, trying to help her daughter through an embarrassing moment.
As she whisks her daughter away, who's there to drop to one knee and take care of the apples? It's Sasha. And he waves everyone else off, taking full responsibility for the tumbled fruit—because Sasha likes to help.
Then, his world gets rocked a little.
This whole sequence is about the Loser Siblings. Yes, of course, waves are made when the sisters arrive. It's part of the drama of the show that Bina is mad, Rebecca is shocked, and everyone else knows juicy drama when they see it.
But who do we see first as the music shifts? It's Sasha.
He isn't even at the right angle to see them first. He's around the corner from the door. But when they pieced the sequence together, they wanted us to see Sasha's eyes trailing from apples (which could be seen as "forbidden fruit") to the hot ladies walking in the door.
He straightens as his eyes land on them. And if you're paying attention, you can see where this shot of him might have been intended for later as the actor completes the same head movement at the edge of our view in another shot.
They edited it to be Sasha first on purpose. This is intentional. Someone, somewhere, made a call that this sequence would show that little world shift of Sasha and Morgan.
As they enter, Joanne and Morgan offer bitch face to Bina and Rebecca. And can we talk about Rebecca, the ex being with the family? Yes, she is Esther's best friend, but they are all clearly planting their flags on the "Noah is so getting back with Rebecca" plan.
While Joanne's eyes move into the crowd looking for Noah as they pass Bina and Rebecca, Morgan's find Sasha, still kneeling on the ground. And, oh, he is looking back.
She smiles into a small laugh that's just for him before her resting bitch face takes over. And as Joanne and Morgan split to either side of the camera, we're left with Sasha in focus, center frame, clearly watching after Morgan as she goes.
This is romcom framing, folks. This is clearly a moment of, "Holy shit, she's a smokeshow!"
And it's not that he didn't already know it. But in that moment he totally forgets himself and mentally acknowledges that sexy dress and that special smile meant just for him.
Yeah, these two are screwed.
Again, I am not condoning or encouraging infidelity. These are fictional characters who I hope get their shit together in Season 2 and find a way to be together without a cheating trope.
Only the writers know what's in store for next season. I can only comment on what's on the screen, now. And that sequence was intentional.
"I hope it's chill that I crashed. You know, I just, I love a DJ." "The more the merrier! Absolutely. I'm so happy you two made up."
And they look to one another with a smile. But I also note that they don't tell Noah anything about how it all went down. Now, Morgan escapes before there's really time to ask about that, but, looking back later, this could be seen as a time Joanne chose to shelter Morgan and Sasha.
And we know that Joanne doesn't know the full story, but she also knows they aren't sneaking off into the bathroom for a quickie (you know Morgan once led an episode of their podcast entitled "Public Places & Small Spaces").
Still... looking back.. both Morgan and Joanne kept the truth of their reconciliation from Noah... because they were protecting Sasha and Morgan.
"Hello, Joanne. My heavens, you came. And you brought an uninvited guest."
Morgan, I love you clinking those glasses together. Oh my gosh, girl, never change. But Mama Roklov has been warning since Day One about the "sister". Does she suspect something? I doubt it. But she definitely doesn't want her family having any more connections with Joanne's.
Oh, my sweet summer child, what you don't know!
And the dance sequence made me smile. I know there are a lot of character things going on, here, but it also reminded me so much of my wedding.
Wow, have I gotten this deep in without talking about my heritage!? Oy vey! So, my Dad's mother was raised by Catholic nuns in Barcelona, Spain. My mother's mother converted to Judaism when she married my Ukrainian grandfather, before they had my mom.
I was raised in a very weird mix of cultures and traditions. My mother rejected Judaism, so I had to learn everything from my cousins.
My mother also wasn't that supportive of my Spanish heritage from my father, so my adult life has been spent piecing together the pieces of who I am.
But my wedding was full of joy. 250 people of different cultures and backgrounds all conga-lining, doing the hora, and lifting Matthew and I in the air on their shoulders.
I had a lovely moment of remembrance watching the dance sequence in this episode.
There are so many pockets of life from my Jewish side of my family that are so special and unique, and while no media portrayal of a culture is perfect, I've enjoyed this show immensely.
Anyway... back to the show:
"Why are you here?"
There's a tinge of, "You don't belong here" in that. Bitch, why are you here!?
"Your dumb little lie really fucked up my relationship with my sister." "I don't know what you're talking about."
Flames. Flames coming out the side of my head. Yes, I know you're pissed, Rebecca, but you don't give a shit that your lie is impacting someone who has nothing to do with this!?
Listen, sugar, why don't you and your bestie lock yourselves in a closet and make out for a while since you clearly enjoy each other's company more than any of the men's anyway? It would save everyone a lot of heartache and I think make all y'all happier.
"Okay, don't bullshit me. Alright? Sasha told me everything."
No, Morgan, what are you doing!? Okay, technically telling Rebecca is not the same thing as telling Esther, but practically? Girl, the game is up!
No more coasting along for Sasha and Morgan. With Bina and Esther and Rebecca all united, seas are gonna be stormy in Season 2.
"Did you tell Sasha that I lied to the tall sister?"
Rebecca, you just got a small point for being nicer in your chosen descriptor than Esther. "Tall" is a lot less bitchy than "Dumb".
"What did the idiot do?" "He told her!"
Welp, she calls Morgan "Dumb" and Sasha an "Idiot", so maybe she'll come to see them as the perfect match. But, seriously, it was a bitchy thing to do.
Yes, Sasha is still in the wrong by Esther for breaking her confidence. Not glazing over that at all.
Narratively was it the right call? Yes, we needed Morgan and Joanne reconciled in case there wasn't a second season. But as far as his marriage goes, Sasha has definitely stepped outside the lines.
"No. Not possible. He doesn't even know her." "Pretty sure he knows her."
Now, in cannon Esther knows about that first night out where they literally got 20 minutes tops at the bar before she broke it up, and then she saw him greet Morgan at the basketball game. As far as Esther knows, that's it.
She knows nothing else about their dynamic, and now she's going fishing.
"I love Bat Mitzvahs. There's so much free shit! You know?" "Yeah."
Sasha was already facing the bar when she came up, so he's basically gone back to first position on this one. He's facing away from her. But she wants to talk to him.
And it strikes me that if we went a little wider in the shot, Sasha and Morgan are reversed in their positioning from the bar.
He's facing the bar instead of her facing a jukebox, but it's that same positioning. Only this time, she is open to him and waiting for him to open up to her.
"Hey, um, thank you, you know, for finally telling me the truth. My sister was never going to speak to me again."
She touches his arm as she speaks. Now, this isn't a big deal for Morgan. She touches people. She touched Rebecca while they were talking. She touches her sister. She's a tactile person.
But, I noticed it because Esther doesn't touch Sasha a whole lot. He is very used to a relationship without gentle affection. And I wonder what was going through his mind when Morgan touched him.
"That's alright. Happy to help."
Look. At. His. Face. It's blink and you'll miss it, but I can't recall ever seeing Sasha this... soft.
Like, Mr. Simons, I did not know your game!
He smiles a half smile that dimples his cheek. And on the reverse shot, you can tell that Morgan feels that softness because her smile fades as she looks from his eyes to his lips.
She doesn't realize that his wife made him promise not to tell anyone and that he broke that promise. But she knows that something is shifting between them. Even if she can't name it, now that Joanne is aware of their "friendship", she has to really think about it.
Why does he have your number, Morgan? Why is he so comfortable texting you? Why are you still texting him? Why are you calling each other? You know he has to hide in the bathroom, that he is literally hiding you from his wife the way your sister's ex who she was obsessed with and talked about in episode one hid her.
Are you really the one who is only interested in men who are emotionally unavailable?
And she's not quite ready to think about that. But she does have to acknowledge somehow that these blurred lines aren't going unnoticed.
"You know, she thought it was weird that we talk to each other."
And there it is. Morgan wanted Joanne to tell her that the sex dream was gross, and she didn't. But, clearly Joanne did express that it was weird that they talk. And now that it's out there, Morgan can't keep it in any more than Sasha can keep in a secret.
This is when Sasha opens up to face her. They are having a personal conversation, now, about them. Whatever they are... this is their first real discussion about it since they band-aided it with the "friend" label.
"I'm telling you, it's not weird-"
Because he still wants to hold onto the idea that he's on the right side of the line. He still wants to believe that they are in the clear.
Because he would never cross a physical line. It just wouldn't happen. It's not in his makeup. He's loyal and dedicated and willing to stay by Esther's side even if she cheated on him.
But Morgan is self-aware enough now that she's had to think about it to realize that they are toeing some pretty big lines, here. Maybe not in terms of physical affection, but in terms of connection.
"Okay, stop saying that it's not weird when we both know that it kind of is." "Alright, fine."
The bravado instantly fades. He's honest with her. He's open with her.
"It might be a little weird, but I enjoy talking to you. Is that so bad?"
And there he's redrawn the lines. Yes, it's "weird", but we're just talking, right? Talking isn't bad, right? We can talk, right?
A month or so earlier they sat in a car where she waited for him to affirm her label. "Friend". And he did. This time, he's waiting for her to tell him if this is bad or not.
It's not bad, right? Talking?
Except "talking" is the exact verb Morgan used when asking Sasha about Rebecca and Noah. She asked if they were "talking" again before sharing that Rebecca said they were getting back together.
But neither one of them is thinking about that right now. Honestly, they're enjoying the time together more than either would admit, and they lean into it.
"No. No. I'm fun to talk to."
She takes it back to their banter, and he is thoroughly charmed. Look at that smile!
"There we go. A little Stuart level confidence there."
He's smiling so broadly, so sweetly as he lifts his drink to his lips. She fixates on it, asking for a drink, then practically demanding it. He relinquishes it with a smile.
And as he's still smiling at her, she holds eye contact while drinking from his glass.
Freeze frame that shit and this is full romcom. Like, she is looking up at him drinking from his drink while he smiles, nearly in a daze.
And her holding his gaze is intentional. There's a sultry edge to it as they toe this line a little too closely between friendly and flirtatious.
The surprise on Morgan's taste buds shatters the moment.
"Wait, there's no alcohol in that." "Yeah, I told you a hundred times, I'm California sober."
A hundred times. A hundred times?! Just how many text conversations have you two been having!?
The barkeep apparently read her mind (or maybe knew her order from earlier) and passes over something with actual alcohol. Yes, it's television magic, but we're gonna roll with it, okay?!
"Are you high?" "Mmm-hmm" "Can I have some?" "Yes. 100%."
Seriously, if these two do have a future, "100%" is going to be one of those things that comes back as theirs. There are those little phrases or words that seep into the collective comprehension of a couple, and this one would be in the running for them.
But, also, he finally has someone who wants to share in these things with him. Morgan is actively asking to share in this with him. Where before she wanted to kick him out of her car and run across the bar to get away, now she seeks him out.
This scene of them drinking together is such a far cry from their first drink together, at a bar only a few months earlier.
There, she made a face at Sasha sticking a finger in his brother's drink, contaminating it. Here, she actively drinks from his glass.
There, she didn't want to look at him or talk to him. Here, she's the one seeking him out, and they are growing closer by the minute.
This guy she thought she was tolerating for a few minutes at a bar for her sister's sake is now someone she wants in her life, even if she isn't fully sure of the capacity. Like, what are they?
Dipping toes into an emotional affair, absolutely. But where does it go from here? Would they cross those physical lines?
Personally, I see more kiss and retreat than full-blown affair from these two, but I'm not writing the show. I'm just writing this ridiculously long Meta because these actors played these scenes so bloody well and I can't get them outta my head.
As Morgan and Sasha share in a moment, toasting to their future shared high, Esther and Bina look on in dismay. Esther scrolls through the text messages, and I'm going to write them out below (the ones I can read).
Sasha: Ughhh now I want tacos. Sasha: are you gonna go? send pics Morgan: [photo of three tacos] Sasha: Best tacos in LA, right?!?! Morgan: They're amazing! You're right. Sasha: Win for the loser siblings!!! Morgan: lol fine! Win for the loser siblings. Sasha: Have you seen Dune? Morgan: no?? should I Sasha: Are you going to see the sequel? Morgan: I wasn't planning on it. Sasha: Well, if you're gonna watch the sequel you should def see the first one. Morgan: hey, can I call you? Sasha: Yeah, give me two Morgan: Thank you for telling me the truth [heart emoji]
These aren't love notes. But they also aren't the sort of texts you expect a married man to send a single woman.
We see here that he helped her find some great tacos, that she finally embraced their shared "Loser Siblings" label after denying it for so long, that they were talking movies.
And those last few lines are where it escalates. They've been talking... and she sent him a heart emoji.
Emojis have meaning, right? Especially for Morgan. When she sent Joanne her first blush impression of Sasha, she included several unflattering emojis. This time, she sent him a heart.
And that's the last we see of Sasha and Morgan because this isn't their bloody show. And, to be clear, I adore Noah and Joanne. I'm just personally more drawn to what is going on over here.
I don't know if I'm a loser sibling, myself. But I know what it's like to feel like you can do nothing right, that you have to accept the path someone else chose for you, that you have to marry the "right kind of person" (tell you that story of the boyfriend before my husband another time).
Lupe and Simons are knocking it out of the park with their chemistry, comedic timing, and those micro-expressions that make metas like this so much fun.
Again, I'm not a fan of cheating story lines. It's just not my thing. But, I can see several paths forward that don't involve cheating.
Ultimately, I'm just a viewer, like you! I have no control over this wild ride. But, oh, it's a fun one!
Thanks for reading, loves. Can't wait to see what they have in store for Season 2!
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