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ribellaione · 5 years ago

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SHAKESPEARE AESTHETICS.

𝐫𝐨𝐦𝐞𝐨 &. 𝐣𝐮𝐥𝐢𝐞𝐭. suburban july. scraped knees. bruised knuckles. blood in your teeth. bare feet on hot concrete. restlessness. your high school’s empty parking lot. love poems in your diary. a window open to coax in the breeze. burning inside. an ill - fitting party dress. a t - shirt you cut up yourself. the time you tried to give yourself bangs. biking to your friends house. bubble gum. gas station ice. the feeling that you’ve met before. rebellion. a car radio playing down the street. cheap fireworks. a heart drawn on the inside of your wrist with a sharpie. switchblades. red solo cups. dancing in your bedroom. screaming yourself hoarse. running out of options. the forlorn looking basketball hoop at the end of a cul - de - sac. climbing onto your roof at night while your parents are asleep. flip - flops. a eulogy written on loose - leaf. the merciless noontime sun.

𝐡𝐚𝐦𝐥𝐞𝐭. speaking in a whisper. holding your breath. a browning garden. a half remembered story. furniture covered with sheets. fog at dawn, mist at twilight. losing touch. the ethereal space between winter and spring. the soft skin at your temple. the crack in the hallway mirror. things you’d say if you knew the words. uncombed hair. books with writing in the margins. books with cracked spines. books with lines scratched out. prayers on all souls’ day. a chipped ceramic bathtub. a cold stone floor. the uncomfortable awareness of your own heartbeat. the sparrow that got in your house. shadows. the creek you played in as a child. a dirty night gown. an oversized t - shirt. a collection of your favorite words. soil beneath your nails. ghost stories. the strangeness of your own name in your mouth. deep silence. exhaustion. a cliff with a long, long drop down.

𝐭𝐰𝐞𝐥𝐟𝐭𝐡 𝐧𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐭. wicker deck furniture. new england summer. large sunglasses and a blonde bob. a storm over the ocean. patio umbrellas flapping in the wind. the smell of chlorine. muffled laughter. sarcasm. starched cuffs. day drinking. bay windows. the idea of love. love for the idea of love. love for love’s sake. hangovers. wandering over the sand dunes. a vagabond with a guitar. fishermen with tattoos. a pretty boy with a slacked tie. a lighthouse. growing too close. boat shoes. feeling yourself change. big, floppy sunhats. double - speak. a song you keep listening to. turning red under their gaze. margaritas drank on an inflatable pool lounger. string lights on a balmy night. sleepy june days. fights you’re unprepared for. hope you weren’t expecting. pranks that go too far. bad poetry. pining. becoming less of a stranger.

𝐦𝐚𝐜𝐛𝐞𝐭𝐡. the space where your grief used to be. a bird that’s lost an eye. old blood stains. heavy blinds. the smell of sweat. the stillness after a battle. a fake smile. a curse. the taste of metal at the back of your tongue. your house, unfamiliar in the dark. a dusty crib. the smell of sulfur. an orange pill bottle. streaks in the sink. a black cocktail dress. your hand on the doorknob, shaking. a chilly breeze. crunching from the gravel driveway on a moonless night. clenched hands. a rusty swing set. a flashing digital clock stuck on 12 : 00. a snake that crosses your path. an owl that watches you. a dog that runs when you approach. red smoke, dark clouds. cool steel. tile floors. footsteps in the hallway late at night. a baggy suit that used to fit before. visions. insomnia headaches. nursery rhymes. being too far in to go back now.

𝐦𝐮𝐜𝐡 𝐚𝐝𝐨 𝐚𝐛𝐨𝐮𝐭 𝐧𝐨𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐠. the high drama of small towns. a pickup truck. military supply duffel bags in the hall, hugs all around. tulip bulbs. a wraparound porch. a pitcher of iced tea. a rubber halloween mask. someone on your level. ill - timed proclamations. stomach clenching laughter. rushing in. not minding your business. crepe paper. white lies. secrets written down and thrown away. southern hospitality. homemade curtains in the kitchen. a sink full of roses. hiding in the bushes. old friends. the wedding dress your grandma wore, and her mama before her. a dog - eared rhyming dictionary. chamomile with honey. the intimacy of big parties. lawn flamingos. gossip. a crowded church. friendly rivalries. unfriendly rivalries. stuff getting real. love at five hundredth sight. not realizing you’re home until you’re there.

𝐤𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐥𝐞𝐚𝐫. cement block buildings. power lines that birds never perch on. the end of the world. useless words. rainless thunder, heat lighting, a too big sky. arthritic knuckles. broken glass. chalk cliffs. the pulsing red - black behind closed eyes. something you learned too late. wet mud that sucks up your shoes while you walk. a cold stare. empty picture frames. empty prayers. the obscenity of seeing your parents cry. a treeless landscape. bloody rags. grappling in the dark with reaching hands. the sharpness at the the tips of your teeth. the blown out windows of a skeletal house. decay. jokes that aren’t jokes. biting your tongue. prophecies. aching muscles, tired feet. stinging rain. invoking the gods. wondering if the gods are listening. worrying that the gods are dead. white noise. shivers. numbness. the unequivocal feeling of ending.

𝐚 𝐦𝐢𝐝𝐬𝐮𝐦𝐦𝐞𝐫 𝐧𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐭’𝐬 𝐝𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐦. the smell of wet soil and dead leaves. listening to music on headphones with your eyes closed. wildflowers. the distant sparkle of lightning bugs. fear that turns into excitement. excitement that turns to frenzy. mossy tree trunks. a pair of yellow eyes in the darkness. night swimming. moonlight through the leaves. a bass beat in your chest. a butterfly landing on your nose. a kiss from a stranger. a dark hallow in an old tree. glow in the dark paint. drinking on an empty stomach. a twig breaking behind you. spinning until you’re dizzy. finding glitter on your body and not remembering where it came from. an overgrown path through the woods. cool dew on your skin. a dream that fades with waking. moths drawn to the light. giving yourself over, completely. afterglow. the long, loving, velvety night.

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#.& shattered glass and black holes [AES]#.& INKED PAGES [memes]

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blogoffshore304 · 3 years ago

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Glass Effect After Effects

Broken Glass Effect

Glass Effect In After Effects

Glass Effect Windows 10

Age Glass Effects

Cover image via

In this video tutorial you’ll discover how to create a dynamic shattered glass effect in After Effects – great for titles, trailers and promo videos!

Add a slick shattered glass effect to your motion design and video editing projects – great for giving logos and title sequences maximum impact. Shattered glass is easy to simulate using the AE built-in Shatter effect.

In this video tutorial we walk through step by step through the process of creating this glass effect in your own After Effects video projects.

First we’ll add the shatter effect to shape layers in After Effects. Then, we’ll make the animation more dynamic with the After Effects virtual camera. Lastly, we’ll apply this effect to text.

Learn the basics of creating shattered glass in After Effects and then tweak this animation for your own custom effect:

Creating a cool glass breaking effect in After Effects, and then freezing the action with a little time-remapping from tutorial author Toby Fitzpatrick.Check out the Creating Breaking Glass & Freezing Time in After Effects Tutorial here. After Effects / project Elegant slideshow with glass style layers and flare transitions. Download Free After Effects Template View the license for this template.

Broken Glass Effect

Full Video Transcript:

(color-box color=”gray”) This is Evan Abrams for PremiumBeat.com and today we’re going to be shattering glass in After Effects. We’ll be making use of the built-in shatter effect and you don’t even need to use external 3D programs to make it happen. So let’s get into After Effects and start breaking things.

So the first thing to do in After Effects is create a new composition and we’re going to go with the HDTV 1080 24 pre-set and duration of 1 minute long, background color black, and click OK. The first thing to do is to make the actual thing we’re going to shatter. So to do that we’re going to create a new solid and we’re just going to leave that solid as black because we’re using a very dark scene. So we’re just going to be shattering a black piece of glass, but you can use any piece you’d like. So if you use, say, like a gray, we’d use blackness of 10. And then we’ll put some text on top of it, for example, just type in the word, “glass.” Scale it up and put it in the center of the composition there. This will serve as our glass. If you want to put other things, like a texture or any type of element that you want to shatter, it could be a logo, it could be anything, make sure you put it in this first composition. So select both of those and then we’re going to go layer pre-compose, and pre-compose both of those elements. And we’ll call this “Glass to shatter” so we know this is the glass we’re going to shatter. Good. Now to this we’re going to apply the shatter effect, and this will determine all of the attributes of the glass that we’re shattering. So as you can see by default, that actually shatters a bunch of bricks which is not exactly what we’re after.

So go into the shape and change the pattern to be glass instead of bricks. So you can see by default, also, it has fairly large chunks. We want to simulate the glass shattering in large chunks and then those chunks becoming smaller chunks. So in order to do that, we’re going to change the repetitions. So I’m just going to zoom in here on the timeline and we’re going to set key frames for the numbers of repetitions. So call up the keyframes by hitting U and I’m just going to zoom right in here. And all the action on these key frames can happen in the first five frames. So on frame one we want the repetitions to be 10. On frame two we want the repetitions to be 25. Frame three, we want them to be 35. Frame four, we want them to be 50. So they’re getting quite a bit bigger, quite a bit faster. The extrusion depth we want to take down to .05 to make them a lot thinner, because we don’t want thick glass chunks coming out. We want a thin pane of glass shattering. And this is all a matter of scale so if you want thicker glass, of course leave the extrusion depth up.

The next thing to change is the force and the force is going to have a depth of .01 and strength of 4. It doesn’t need to be as strong as the default. And we’re also going to key frame the radius. So click on the stopwatch there and the radius we want on frame one to be .11. And then on frame two we’d like it to be .12. And then on frame four we’d like it to be .17. This is causing the radius to expand into that first line of chunks and then on the next step to make sure that those chunks are still consistent with the first key frame we made. And if you’re not scaling the size of the thing coming through the glass, here, it’s going to become a little bit strange as the size of the glass changes and it changes where the edge of the break is. So these numbers help keep this within the bounds of what would be an expected shatter pattern.

Now we leave the gradient and the physics alone, and we just come down here to the texture. We change the opacity down to .75. And in order to observe what we’re really doing, change it from wire frame and force to rendered, so we can actually really see the work we’re doing. Now the front mode is fine to be the layer, so it will display whatever the layer is. The side mode, however, we want to be color plus opacity, so the sides of the shattered pieces are going to be white and 75% transparent. And the back mode, we’re going to have that set just to be color, because we’re trying to fake sort of a shine that happens when light reflects off of the pieces. And we can fake this, quite simply, by having the back of the pieces be bright so it seem kind of like they’re tumbling in a light.

Now speaking of lighting, we have to change some of the lighting settings. And on those settings we’re going to change the light intensity to be at 5. So quite bright. And then we’re going to move that light to be behind the plane of the shatter, so it’s casting light from the back. And we’re going to put the ambient light up to .5 and we are going to change the light color to be sort of a light blue. So I’m going to go with something like, somewhere in the blues here, not a lot of saturation and brightness all the way up to 100%. So a nice and bright light blue. And that should do for the shatter.

And the next thing we’re going to want to put in is a camera so we’re able to control how we’re looking at this. So back in the effect we want to make sure that the camera system it’s using is the comp camera. So now when we move this camera around in the scene, it’s going to change the way we’re looking at the glass. So as you can see, you can move around all parts of this thing with the camera to get a better look at it. In order to control the camera better, we’re going to make a new null object and we’re going to parent the camera to the null object and use the null object’s rotation and position to move the camera around. So make the null object 3D, pull up its rotation, just use moving the null object around on the screen to change its position around. So we’d like to change its wire rotation a little bit, so it’s kind of exploding out, and maybe set the camera a little bit below it. And something like that, and now we’ll just grab ahold of that Z access and just push ourselves in closer. Now you can see we’re nice and close, and it explodes right into the camera. So that’s quite good. Move us back so we can see the full frame of that break, and that should be good.

So we have this thing breaking and it creates a hole, so that’s all good. If you’d like to put a background, something in behind here, now is definitely the time to do that. So I’m going to create a new solid and make the solid completely black. Hit OK, good. And just move it in behind so it’s a light window that breaks and there’s nothing but blackness in behind. So take all of these elements and we’re going to pre-compose those and we’re going to call this “glass animation.” And now we’re going to time relap this make it more dramatic. So just go layer, time, enable time relapping. Now, we want to go to where that first shatter kind of happens, so it’s breaking. And we want the pieces to be right in our face, so that’s a good spot to start. And you can just go ahead about five or so frames, put a key frame there, as well.

Now we’re going to just go ahead to where all the pieces have fallen off and away and set a key frame there. Advance the last key frame and remove it, because really our animation is done after all our pieces are off. What we’re going to do is grab these last two key frames here, and we’re going to move them away from the first two key frames. And After Effects fills in the rest of the information to make this floating glass happen for us. Then we’ll just pinch the last two together a little bit, so that it’s floating and then it speeds away. And now take these center two keyframes, so they’re the start and end of the slowdown, pull them control or command, click on them, turn them into these nice circles to auto their values. And then you can see that it kind of gradually gets into the slowing and then it comes out of the slowing, as well.

Glass Effect In After Effects

And the last thing to add to all of this stuff is what’s called a force motion blur, which will force these things to be blurry. So that it’s blurry and then it slows down like the camera is speeding up to catch these things, but you still have that nice motion blur when it breaks open. So stylistically, we’re also going to want to make a new adjustment layer and on that adjustment layer I’m going to put a curves. I’m going to use this curves just to kind of make these things brighter and a little more contrast. I’m going to go into the red and pull some of the reds out. I’m going to go into the blues, and add some blue. Just to give it a blue look, because for whatever reason things at nighttime are blue and we associate blue with dark things.

Now we’re going to create a new, solid, maybe comp size, keep it black and put it below everything. And on this layer we’re going to put a ramp and make the start of the ramp to be sort of a lighter color, so maybe a 20%. And the end color, make it fully dark. Good. Set the start of the ramp to be in the center. Set the end of the ramp to be out of frame, down in the corner. And then set your glass animation to be on add so that you can see we’ve got this nice gradient just behind, coloring everything. And maybe change the gradient to a radial gradient. And that looks quite nice. Although, the linear gradient, you know, there’s something to be said for that, as well. So just make this a little darker, I’m happy with those results. Download vsdx file. So now you have a nice, shattering title of whatever you put on that first layer.

Glass Effect Windows 10

And you can always go back to that layer, the glass to shatter layer, and then change this. Microsoft edge osintegrationlevel. So if you don’t want it to say “glass,” it can say, “EC Abrams from Premiumbeat.com.” And then you can have a nice, little title here. You might just want to size that up and put that in a better spot, but all told, that pretty much sums up what we’re making. The last thing to do is, of course, export it, where you’ll just set your work area and render it out.

Age Glass Effects

So, this has been Evan Abrams for PremiumBeat.com, your source for tips and tricks in After Effects and other applications, on our blog. Stop by and learn some stuff. And of course come to PremiumBeat.com for all of your music and sound effects needs. I’m Evan Abrams. Thank you so much for watching. Subscribe to our channels and I will see you around the internet. (/color-box)

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meladotjournal · 4 years ago

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Esther - As The World Caves In

EPISODE TITLE: “... And I Feel Fine”

“Esther and Aeszura are back, reunited with Kadriel, and everything’s going great. A little too great. The trio is in for a rude awakening.” (stolen from Kari’s lovely creator)

GOD has entered the chat.

Takes place during Supernatural Season 15, Episode 12 -- “Galaxy Brain”. Chuck has decided to destroy every single alternate reality, which of course includes that of our dear original characters. Set sometime after Esther’s resurrection, the previous end to her storyline. Near 2300 words!

/////

Esther’s body was different. For starters, it was almost unbearably warm. And tired. She lay in bed, with a heavy knit blanket over her legs, as instructed. Human, undeniably so — her skin no longer glowing from any fancy brand or curse or possession or enchanted knife, but from her own renewed spirit. Every atom, every fiber regenerated and patched together, burning and restarting her system completely.

The blade was no more, her tether reintegrated into her system in some dubious amount, but it was enough to feel whole. Technically her physical body was only a few weeks old, but it was a practically perfect replica of what she was before any of this had started -- before the monsters, before the deals, before the day the world split into two. She could stand to lose a few years, they had always joked, but having it actually happen was something entirely alien. And even then, her childhood scars and even her piercings were nowhere to be seen. Her trusty denim jacket was also lost (and it would have been much too warm for her now anyways) so she fiddled with the sleeves on her newest and itchiest sweater, getting used to the feeling of fabric on her skin, something she hadn’t felt even when she did have a body.

Things were different, but she was home. There was no more running, no more resenting or repressing. There weren’t any more doubts or voices clashing against each other in rough agonized tones, but one unified Esther. Everything wiped clean, baby-smooth pink skin rubbed raw and healed without question by the angel Kadriel. Kari.

She knew that she would have to find a way to help Kari, not because she was obligated to, but because she wanted to. Her chest ached in an unfamiliar way that she both hated and loved, for the first time in a long time finally feeling.

It had been a long time, impossibly long, since Esther last walked the Earth. It was even more difficult now to process, and Esther had to stop herself from wondering how far along her corpse was in the decaying process, if there was a corpse at all. Kari didn’t like to talk about it -- about the time she spent alone. A lifetime ago Esther wouldn't have cared so long as she was still functioning as needed. But what used to be a twinge of guilt was nestled in the center of her brain once again, and she held back her burning questions until Kari was comfortable talking about it. Esther didn’t remember much, if anything at all from the time in between. Sometimes, just as she was drifting off to sleep, she could feel flashes of something her mind couldn’t quite wrap around. A clenched fist, cold leather seats, an aluminum briefcase, and then blinding bright light. If she didn’t know any better, she would have assumed she had visited Heaven.

Esther watched the angel from across the room. Before, she never really understood how it felt to be nothing more than a human surrounded by all-powerful supernatural beings. She never heeded the feeling of static in the air, or the migraines, or the taste of blood in the back of her throat. Putting the supernatural aside, despite her unchanging appearance, Kari was difficult to recognize. She’d give a friendly wave and smile like always, but it never reached her eyes, not anymore. Esther recognized the look, the dullness. If she was different, Kari was immeasurably so, with her hawklike gaze and eerie presence. After thousands of years of unchanging existence, what could possibly have happened that could do this to her friend?

Pulling her own now-glossy eyes away from her much older friend, she squinted at Kari’s borrowed laptop from where she sat on the bed.

“Put your glasses on, Esther,” Kari chimed, “I didn’t give you brand new eyes just for you to neglect them.”

“I look like a fucking nerd.” She did.

“Yeah, you do.” Another voice agreed. The lump of blankets piled on the couch trembled before revealing a vibrant mop of hair and a mess of freckles. “Please just, urgh, destroy them before I have to shove them down your throat and choke you with those ugly fucking things. I’m still not convinced that’s even actually you over there -- you’re like a shitty clone or something.”

Esther wasn’t used to having her feelings hurt. Aeszura went back to her phone, mindlessly scrolling through musical.ly -- TikTok. Even their phones are different, Esther complained. I can’t believe they came out with another fucking iPhone, They couldn’t wait until I stopped being dead?

“I simply wouldn’t allow that to happen. Besides, you know that’s not how it works, Aes,” Kari sighed.

Esther perked at the mention of what “it” was, but unfortunately the explanation ended before it even began. She knew that Kadriel had worked tirelessly to bring her friends back to life, but it never occurred to her that Aeszura could have helped along the way somehow.

“Keep laughing,” she squinted in the direction of the red blob, “I noticed that you’re missing some freckles, p-pizzaface.”

“Don’t even pretend like you can see that far. Idiot. Stupid.”

Esther threw her head back into the hard wooden headboard of the bedframe, swearing at the sky before angrily shoving her glasses on. She glared at Aeszura. Different. Everything’s different. Aeszura, despite her best efforts to loudly scream otherwise, had grown. It was hard for Esther to place. Was her hair longer? Were her eyes softer? She was definitely angrier, but Esther couldn’t figure out why. She didn’t like talking about what happened either, but Esther knew enough to piece together that she died sometime before Esther did. Her mouth went dry at the memory, at the sound of her phone endlessly ringing in a black sedan, the final voicemail and the hole in he forehead and the fucking Muppets. Her stomach clenched, a pit of ice chilling her insides. Different. But they were still here. They were still together, somehow beating the odds and breathing the same air at the same time. No monsters, no case, just them, at home (wherever they were), together. Esther locked eyes with Aes and smiled, because despite everything -- despite the pitfalls and the immeasurable traumas divided between the three of them -- she was so damn happy. Before she could open her mouth to speak, her phone went off.

At the same time, Kari bolted upright, her hands clutching her head. Seconds later, all three of their phones buzzed, a frantic siren and an avalanche of notifications filling the room. Esther’s stomach dropped once again, too scared and too overwhelmed by her annoyingly human brain to process whatever was suddenly being broadcast on the TV. Kadriel?

“Oh, God -- A-angel radio -- going -- argh. Can’t-- can’t hear anything. Um, excuse me,” Kadriel’s face wrinkled, eyebrows furrowed with the effort of sorting out through hundreds (or was it tens?) of panicked inaudible voices. “God -- God?”

“What the FUCK is happening, Wings?”

“Kari-- are you okay? Aes -- your phone --” Esther jumped out of bed, shoes still on, of course. Her heart pounded. Annoying.

“The sky, oh my God -- Satan -- FUCK. SHIT. The sky, you guys, the fucking sky --” Aeszura clutched her phone, nails tapping angrily on the already-shattered screen.

“My father is back, it seems --”

“Portugal, Cuba, London, even fucking Guam --”

“Or he was --”

Esther looked between the two of them, hyperventilating. Stupid. Annoying. For a moment she wishes that she was back to the way she was, comfortably numb. She shook it away as quickly as possible, shaky hands clutching for something that didn’t exist anymore. She places a hand on her chest, scratching at her annoyingly pristine skin, trying to feel for the raised lines of skin that are no longer there.

“What’s going on?”

Kari gave Aeszura a meaningful look.

“It’s the end of the fucking world.” She spits, shocked and pissed and incredulous.

“What-- what about God??!”

“He’s the one that’s ending it,” says Kari, hushed and so, so very tired. “Heaven and Hell are already gone. The empty, I think, too. Earth’s all that’s left.”

“Wh-- what do we do?!”

“I think we need to step outside, Ess.”

/////

There’s nothing to do.

Esther’s friends both dissolve at the same time, and for one very terrible moment she panics, suddenly alone. Suddenly so much more afraid. And she’s not used to it at all. Stupid, she reminds herself, They’ve gone outside. With shaky legs that refuse to fucking work properly, she bolts through the front door to join them.

/////

There’s nothing for us to do. It’s happening. After everything, despite everything, the end comes anyway. We thought we could cheat death, and we did, for a time.

Suddenly, I am alone, and for one very terrible moment I panic, suffocating, choking on emptiness. My friends -- my friends are gone. Stupid, I’m being stupid. They’re outside. It’s fine.

As much work as Kari put into this body I fucking hate it sometimes. It’s just that I hate feeling scared all the time again. I hate when my emotions affect fucking anything, be it the way I think or how my body moves. But at least this isn’t a vessel forged by God, not anymore. That rat-bastard. I don’t want to think about what’s happening, or why, or him. I am a new creation forged by the blood, sweat, and tears of my friends. Still owing them, always, but at least now I’m here to repay them with whatever time we have left. Maybe the tether isn’t gone. Well, it obviously isn’t, it’s me. Just different. Different. And with my new stupid shaky legs I sprint outside to join them.

The sky is blue. The air is hot. Everything would be fine if it weren’t for the giant flaming meteors headed straight for us. The sky just keeps getting hotter and God doesn’t care.

I don’t want to see this.

Aes has her hands shoved in her pockets. I can’t see her face -- she won’t let me. What is she thinking about? I’m sure if I could then I would see the comet reflected in her eyes. I would see pain. I do see millions of shredded pieces crammed into the one and only Aeszura, the only truly redeemed demon ever to exist. For someone who talks so much, I see all the words crammed in her brain that she never lets slip out. Secrets, so many unthinkable things that I’ll never get to know. I want to punch her. I want her to push me over and laugh and I want to sing stupid songs and give her stupid gifts and call her mean things like we always did. There’s still people we have to piss off, and things we need to talk about when she’s ready to, and places to vandalize and funny tulpas to invent and harass people with.

I still owe her my soul. I hope she knows she has it. Always has. Whatever kind of soul she’s got buried under there, ours are mates. I can see them going down to a shitty bar and downing as much booze as they can steal, going on roadtrips and doing crimes and running away from the soul-Feds. If the world wasn’t ending we’d have made it remember us. Can’t really raise hell when it doesn’t exist anymore. I hope that idea gives her some sort of peace, knowing she can’t be tortured anymore. She was never evil, never deserved the shit she got stuck with. And now, good or bad, kind or cruel, demon or angel, we’re all going to the same place.

Kari looks so tired. Her shoulders slump now, and she’s somehow much more gray, much more guarded. I want to make it okay. I want to apologize for everything. I want to go back to the gardens and I want to hold her hand and I want to spill drinks and complain. I want to teach her about toothpaste and I want her to tell me about the bible, like my parents used to when I was a kid. I want her to place a glowing hand over my face and make it feel okay. There’s still movies we have to see, and things we need to talk about when she’s ready to, and places to visit when the weather is nice and when I can stand upright for longer than fifteen minutes without getting tired.

I still owe her for my being here today. I’d still take this over anything, over zoning out of my mind in heaven reliving illusions of whatever good memories I could possibly have. If I could choose just one moment to live in for eternity, it would be this. Anything less than the end of the world wouldn’t feel right, I think. The world is always ending. And at least for this one I’m whole, and I can feel it. As shitty as the terror-filled part is, I still feel so fucking alive, for the first time. Never in my life have I ever felt so alive. And I can see my friends, the people I can finally call my friends. I’m not alone in the sky, and not in the pits either, I’m in the middle, and it’s a damn good middle.

But there’s still people to save. So many people.

I need to hold something. My hands are wretchedly empty, clammy, and shaking. It’s definitely out of character, and very embarrassing and very stupid, but I step closer between the two giants and pull the both of them closer to me.

Finally pieced together, even if it’s a little late.

I’m still happy anyways. It’s as good of an ending that we’ll ever get, I suppose. Together.

#works #trad #drabble #this is a fic written about supernatural ocs #if you're reading these tags hi ily #who would've thought I'd ever update this huh #look at us. who would've thought. haha not me!#more art on my instagram!#and a funky video edit!#i wanna try to have an illustration for all of these eventually

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fukuchorror-blog · 7 years ago

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WRITER AES .

tagged by: @cyninges, thank you so much!!! tagging: @voyvodas, @drakulya, @latesco, @wangdejian, @shukuchiho and anyone else reading this.

JOHN KEATS: the lavender in sunsets, flowers in the rain, sunlight slipping through clouds, lazy summer afternoons, the heavy scent of musk, flickering candlelight reflecting off the gold titles of books, fireflies on a cool summer night, being wrapped in fresh bedsheets, the ache of wanting what you can never have, dripping sunlight like gold, loving someone so exquisite, soft lips and soft whispers, fingers through hair, names of lovers carved in trees, broken glass, the insistence of being perpetually dreamy.

F. SCOTT FITZGERALD: mahogany wood, crisp winter skies with cold bright stars, the solitude of an early autumn morning wrapped in fog, empty bottles on stacks and stacks of books haphazardly placed in a messy room, pale bruised arms reaching out into the darkness, cigarette smoke just barely hiding the scent of alcohol, a wall of books all poetry and old and weathered, a bad thunderstorm occurring at the end of a beautiful day, the way tragedy strikes in your heart but ends up stopping your breathing for a moment, your favorite sweater, parties spilling into four a.m. with the stars above spinning and dancing, the contrast of blood against snow, a purple split lip oozing blood, black eyes fading to blue to pale skin, the butterflies of falling in love for the first time, the statues falling apart over time in cemeteries, the romanticization of self-destruction

FRANZ KAFKA: the weight of dread that sits heavily in your stomach when thinking about the future, decrepit houses cloaked in mystery from children telling stories of people who died there, the way not even light can escape a black hole, the rich smell of old books, delicate veins in the wrist, ghosts filling lungs, shattered bones, raindrops on the tongue, rusting metal, nostalgia that aches, the way hope feels like a plastic bag over your head

H.P. LOVECRAFT: the anxiety felt when staring into an unknown cave, pouring rain and mud, a child’s fear of the dark, thinking so many questions about your existence as you stare at the vast expanse of never ending ocean, the silence of three a.m., danse macabre by camille saint-saens playing on a record in an empty house, the possibility of aliens and the weird feeling it gives you that you can’t explain, unexplainable phenomena, strange lights in the sky in the dead of night, ouija boards and urban legends

JACK KEROUAC: the brisk pine air of being on a mountain, travels without a destination, those nights where you’re missing three hours of memory, screaming to a lifeless desert about how you’re so alive, coffee shops late at night, car rides at night spent speeding and laughing in the dark, naps spent in the sun, novels highlighted and underlined with notes and epiphanies in the margins, the way uncertainty sits on the shoulders, ignoring flaws and loving life, wind through hair, depression as fog in the brain, impossible ideals, a quiet sunrise, walks alone, when you think about trying to discover all the secrets to the universe, dazzling people, open lands stretching out into infinity, falling in love with being alive.

EDGAR ALLAN POE: the ocean’s horizon inseparable from fog, hollow bones, a preserved heart held in hands, twinkling stars above an old graveyard, the way everything turns to dust, silent black birds with eyes full of wisdom, self-inflicted flames, perfection depicted as a rotting corpse, death as bricks in the heart, lips barely brushing against each other, glassy glazed eyes, biting into a lemon, heart-shaped bruises, rotting flowers on a grave, dried blood and spilled liquor, the hush of dusk when it begins raining, the intimacy of a secret.

#「新撰組武士道 — meta 。#a very nice sheet #thank u for tagging me lulu

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makubes · 7 years ago

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WRITER AES .

tagged by: nabbed off of @latesco tagging: idk who hasn’t done it yet but uh @balsamina @robots-r-us @themaryiestsuetoeversue and YOU!

#headcanon;

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