#-should just put this out there because ik this is a st blog

[lighthouseas]

reminder that this blog does not support noah schnapp in any way shape or form !!!!! he's said enough and he's a massive fucking asshole. end of story

[herotheshiro]

so in abt 2017-18, i came across this manga called sneaky red by thanat. most of the 1st volume, translated, got posted online but i knew there was a continuation. while i don’t remember too much specifics abt my reaction to it then, i distinctly remember being affected by it and by that i mean ... liking it. i remember that i had the feeling of wanting to read the 2nd volume and even a year ago (almost the date!) on this very blog i noted that i “wanna read all of [their] works so bad” and at this point i had only ever read sneaky red so going off of that, i liked it apparently.

fast forward 2-3 years to tonight, where i finally forced myself to finish reading the series since the free month-long futekiya trial is ending soon. and well ... i thought i would be satisfied afterwards since i’ve wanted to finish reading this series for literal years but all i felt was ... disappointment. i’ve had the futekiya subscription for abt 1/2 a month already but i’ve been putting off reading sneaky red bc i mean i’ve read the 1st volume, i knew it was abt abuse pretty much and i wasn’t really into reading something so depressing (i had to reread the 1st volume in this read bc i legit have not touched the manga since whenever i read it last). and ... yeah it is a downer to read with little positive payoff. [putting under cut bc WOW this got long]

let’s get this straight, my perception of what this author is trying to do is this: two guys meet, one of them (A) has anger/emotion management issues and is quick to react with his fists and the other one (B) just so happens to get off at pain (...no further comment at this) ... which is coincidentally a “nice” set-up but A wants to turn over a new leaf bc eventually he feels bad whaling on B all the time ... except suddenly turning over a new leaf when you’ve been living and thinking a certain way for almost two entire decades is not that easy. which alright tl;dr, an abuser/someone quick to physical violence trying to reform. a rather heavy topic to tackle for your debut work ... and unfortunately i don’t think this author really succeeds in doing so. 1st volume was written in 2013 and is their debut work and it definitely feels like a new author work ... the story developments are kind of unclear at times and misaki (i think that was his name?) just accepting getting beaten up by a rando is just so incredibly sad to read bc like ... wtf? i cannot figure out how they came to love each other. i mean haru i can kind of see bc they kind of implied that misaki was one of the 1st ppl to have hope in him even though he himself felt like he was a lost cause, but misaki i just have no fucking idea what happened there. like lust turning into love? idk man falling in love from physical abuse frankly makes no fucking sense esp since it’s not even implied that misaki has low self-esteem or something that would make him accept this treatment. i legitimately would like to go back in time to meet me from 2-3 years and ask them what the fucking hell made me like this manga bc it’s messed up and the topics aren’t even handled that well! this is truly a manga that somehow depicts abuse as being shitty but also romanticizes it somehow?? even though i legit just read it a few hours ago i’m starting to mix up what happened in vol 1 and 2 so let’s just move on to vol 2 now.

vol 2 was definitely more put together in terms of story progression than vol 1 (i mean, being done 3 yrs later i would hope so). i did like it a bit more than vol 1 and there were some cute scenes bw misaki and haru but ... the scenes where misaki still went to see haru even after some seriously messed up scenes being like ‘i still love you’ ... really rubbed me the wrong way bc it kind of felt like a ‘you can heal abusive behavior through love’. i mean yes haru acknowledged his behavior and treatment of misaki was absolute shit and that he’d try to change, but also that ch where they kind of just substituted bdsm as a more socially acceptable way for haru to hit/hurt misaki during sex? BRO THAT’S NOT HOW IT WORKS !! i mean there were some scenes that felt realistic (misaki instinctively defending himself when haru raised his hand) but at the same time it also felt like the author didn’t really know what they were doing. like i get it, haru is supposed to be a nice person who just so happens to react badly to things but ... these kinds of things you kind of legit need professional help for. simply learning to depend more on friends/SOs, completely cutting out your toxic fam from your life... that kind of stuff is not really enough to help you heal. i mean this is a japanese manga, and ik east asian culture has ... thoughts on mental health care but the way the story was presented just didn’t feel realistic at all. yes they did show haru struggling to hold his emotions in check, i did like the scenes where haru was in his own head and saw his brother berating him for his behavior, and i do appreciate they didn’t merely just 180 change his personality and pretend it was easy to change for the better but ... idk. i just simply did not enjoy reading this story and about this relationship, i felt like their issues never really got resolved or are moving in a more constructive direction. i mean i guess this happens irl (bc ppl do stay in abusive relationships despite how bad it gets) but like i just had no fucking idea what misaki even saw in haru in the first place which sounds mean to haru but it’s true ?? like you gotta be attracted to SOMETHING first right, is it just bc he’s nice sometimes (this is worrying bc i’m someone who is weak to ppl simply being nice to me but also bruh if someone is beating my ass idk if i can be attracted to that) ?? it legit at times reminded me of bj alex which is an extremely unfortunate comparison in my book and you know what i just remembered that misaki was attracted to haru partly bc of his looks so uh yeah the comparison holds up.

i don’t even know if i can say i’m glad i read through these 2 volumes of sneaky red. apparently a 3rd volume is getting published next month and i’m like WHAT THE FUCK ELSE IS THERE TO TALK ABOUT ?? i saw a graphic of the side pairing (story covered in motion emotion) on the back cover which i got a lil excited abt bc i am intrigued by that pairing but like ... what else is there to talk abt re: sneaky red’s pairing. they’ve gotten together, they’re growing up and dealing with adult worries (jobs), and they’re moving in a more “positive” direction with their relationship (i.e., haru is opening up more to misaki) while attempting to hurdle the lingering issue of haru’s abuse -- what else is there to cover ... i think this artist really likes this couple which like makes sense for them since they’re their first published OCs but it’s prob just gonna be more senseless writing. the translated caption was like ‘the sequel of the famous debut work is here!’ and i’m like sneaky red is popular? this very unclearly written thing? but then again ppl liked k!lling st@alking and some of harada’s works that are OUT THERE are popular so i guess the fetish for abuse/hurt is strong ...

i didn’t really say anything coherent in this post bc deadass i don’t even remember what the fuck i read even though i read this manga like mere hrs ago which goes to show how much of an impact the story had on me (hint none). abuser stories are usually pretty hit or miss stories i feel, although tbh i don’t think i’ve ever read a hit story because the abuse is usually romanticized or somehow resolved without any issue which is frankly unrealistic and kind of dangerous to be telling people. i admit i don’t have personal experience with abuse (thankfully) so i guess i can’t really say stuff abt how realistic it is or not but ... just very disappointed with the story. i am still struggling to figure out what i liked abt this manga so much back then. i do like the art style a lot bc it’s unique compared to what you see in other BLs but the author’s writing is just very unclear sometimes ... it’s definitely improved since 2013 but ... hah. it was not really an enjoyable read. i legit wanted to stop reading at times but i’ve wanted to finish it for so long so i pushed on ... maybe i should reread so i can more definitively say what exactly i disliked but i don’t wanna read this again.

[interwebkungfu]

Instead of jest, you could familiarize yourself with Trump's history and start spreading it. The media was grossly negligent in their coverage, but he can't stay in office once people know the facts. **Donald Trump's ancestry** *Friedrich Trump, Donald's grandfather* - Dodged military service in Germany by running off to America (Donald did the same decades later by getting a [medical disqualification](http://www.politifact.com/punditfact/article/2015/jul/21/was-trump-draft-dodger/) despite no medical problems) - Moved back to Germany but [was exiled](http://harpers.org/archive/2017/03/the-emigrants/) for draft dodging and returned to America - [Lied to become a citizen:](http://www.thedailybeast.com/articles/2016/08/02/meet-freidrich-pimp-profiteer-and-patriarch-of-the-trump-line.html) (In 1892, Friedrich became a citizen, lying about his age in the process by saying he’d landed in New York two years before he actually had. Two friends accompanied him to the proceedings to attest to his good character. One was a laborer, the other a man whose occupations included providing accommodations for what Blair politely called “female boarding.”) about the length of his residency in the US to fraudulently gain citizenship, his character witnesses being a laborer and a whorehouse operator - Ran whorehouses and made a habit of building property on land he didn't even own (without permission, foreshadowing Donald's future behavior) *Fred Trump, Donald Trump's father:* - Fred Trump was [arrested](https://www.washingtonpost.com/news/the-fix/wp/2016/02/28/in-1927-donald-trumps-father-was-arrested-after-a-klan-riot-in-queens/?utm_term=.f4ddb4324e8f) participating in a KKK march (in support of, not protest of) - Fred Trump [overcharged](http://www.thedailybeast.com/articles/2015/11/23/ike-didn-t-like-trump-s-dad-at-all.html) the government in systemic fraud exploiting funds intended to benefit housing of WW2 vets - Fred Trump (and Donald) discriminated against black tenants and [settled](https://www.washingtonpost.com/news/fact-checker/wp/2016/09/28/trumps-claim-that-a-racial-discrimination-suit-was-brought-against-many-real-estate-firms/) lawsuits with the government over it **Donald Trump: business acumen or conman?** - Trump's first solo project was renovation of The Commodore Hotel into the Grand Hyatt. Trump [received](https://www.nytimes.com/2016/09/18/nyregion/donald-trump-tax-breaks-real-estate.html) $360M in government subsidy for this project with construction costs of only $120M. That's $3 for every $1 invested, the kind of sweetheart government cheese that could turn even the most pitiful man rich. - Trump has received no less than $885M in further government subsidy since then, amounting to over $1B in handouts on the public record - Trump has an [extensive history](http://www.usatoday.com/story/news/politics/elections/2016/06/09/donald-trump-unpaid-bills-republican-president-laswuits/85297274/) of not paying for completed work, generally targeting small businesses that can't afford lawyers to contest his nonpayment - Trump [misrepresents](http://www.nydailynews.com/blogs/dailypolitics/judge-finds-donald-trump-liable-running-unlicensed-school-blog-entry-1.1975780) to the point of criminality: it is illegal to use the term "university" without a license from the state, but runs "Trump University" nevertheless. - Trump has a [long history](http://www.miamiherald.com/news/politics-government/election/article103443042.html) of misrepresenting his financial condition. For example, he pursues highly unusual tactics like demanding Chase not register loans with the public court as is usual practice in order to give the impression that his purchases are made with cash. These types of practices allowed Trump to get leveraged beyond what his actual capital would justify. - When spending public money on construction projects, Donald is usually [over budget and behind schedule](http://www.nydailynews.com/new-york/bronx/trump-golf-ferry-point-cost-city-236-million-article-1.1752901), for example Trump's Ferry Point golf course construction. - Trump businesses were [ranked](http://archive.fortune.com/magazines/fortune/fortune_archive/1999/03/01/255786/index.htm) among the worst in America back in 1999: "on financial soundness, use of corporate assets, keeping talent, and community and environmental responsibility." - Trump has a [history](http://time.com/4465744/donald-trump-undocumented-workers/) of hiring illegal workers, setting below market wages, and then refusing to even pay those wages which has resulted in courts describing his behavior as such: "having first manufactured a falsehood, a person is forced to invent more to maintain it; yet, as here, in the end, time generally reveals what a falsehood hopes to hide." We could go on, but you get the point. And the true story of Trump has much nastier implications we should get on with. **Donald Trump, lifelong asset of the CIA** When Fred and Donald were caught acting like a bunch of KKK losers discriminating against people because of the color of their skin, Trump's lawyer was [Roy Cohn](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Roy_Cohn#Representation_of_Donald_Trump). Roy Cohn was a CIA agent operating sex blackmail rings. [Senator John DeCamp](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/John_DeCamp), author of *The Franklin Cover-up: Child Abuse, Satanism, and Murder in Nebraska.* had this to say about Roy Cohn: >"Said to be Harold Anderson's "closest friend in Washington," Gray is also reportedly a specialist in homosexual blackmail operations for the CIA... Gray's associate Wilson was apparently continuing the work of a reported collaborator of Gray from the 1950's—McCarthy committee counsel Roy Cohn, now dead of AIDS. According to the former head of the vice squad for one of America’s biggest cities, 'Cohn's job was to run the little boys. Say you had an admiral, a general, a congressman, who did not want to go along with the program. Cohn’s job was to set them up, then they would go along. Cohn told me that himself.'" Roy Cohn is also tied to the JFK assassination as a board member of Permindex and other major pedophilia scandals like the Detroux Affair besides Franklin involvement. This is the man that Donald Trump described as a "second father" (Johnston, *The Making of Donald Trump*). So, Donald Trump's handler in the CIA is identified and of the worst sort. If you didn't know about the Trump family history of pimping, joining the KKK, discriminating against minorities, cheating small business owners, living large off the government teat, and so on you might think "maybe Trump just didn't know who was getting involved with when it comes to Cohn" but, alas, even that wouldn't hold up. Enter [Joseph Weichselbaum](http://www.thesmokinggun.com/documents/celebrity/the-donald-and-the-dealer-173892). When Trump hired Weichselbaum's company to provide helicopter service between New York and Donald's casinos in New Jersey, Weichselbaum was already a twice convicted felon for grand theft auto and embezzlement. This is a very curious decision on the part of Trump because part of maintaining a gambling license (on which his fortune apparently depended when he was heavily invested in Atlantic City) is scrupulous disassociation from anyone with even hints of criminal activity. Trump was putting his gambling license on the line to hire a felon. Eventually, Weichselbaum is caught redhanded by the DEA with kilos of cocaine as part of the bust of a large distribution ring. Shockingly, Trump further "endangers" his gambling license (not really, of course, as it was protected by virtue of his being a CIA asset) by writing to the court in defense of Weichselbaum, >"conscientious, forthright, and diligent" and "a credit to the community." Weichselbaum's case was transferred to the New Jersey court system, a rather peculiar thing given that he was busted in Ohio, resided in Florida, and his business incorporated in New York - New Jersey therefore not being on the list of places any ordinary case would be tried. Why did this happen? Well, it turns out Donald's sister, Maryanne Trump Barry, was a judge in New Jersey and conveniently received Weichselbaum's case. (At this point alarm bells might be going off bigly: Bush Sr ran cocaine procurement overseas, Clinton importation in Mena Arkansas and Trump a distributor - so the cushy relationship starts to make sense beyond campaign donations and wedding party attendance) Donald Trump also became close associates with Saudi billionaire [Adnan Khashoggi](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Adnan_Khashoggi), who was implicated in the Iran-Contra scandal (source of funds being the Bush-Clinton-Trump cocaine racket). Trump and Khashoggi had much in common as socialites, both reveling in flaunting wealth and showmanship. Trump [said](http://www.vanityfair.com/magazine/1989/09/dunne198909) he read every word ever written about Khashoggi, bought Khashoggi's yacht, and socialized with Khashoggi's lieutenants like Ramy El-Batwari. It should become clear that Trump associates with criminals as a rule rather than a mistake by now, but here's one more: [Felix Sater](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Felix_Sater#Work_with_the_Bayrock_Group). Sater was convicted of both fraud and assault before getting into business with Trump, but hired to work on various projects like Trump International Hotel in Phoenix and Trump SoHo development, then later acts as a one of several shadow contacts between Trump & Russia.