#-doesnt get upset when im too tired to do things. yknow.

[poems-of-a-lover]

the thought of sleeping in bed with a guy and my cat and just snuggling together for hours. holding each other tight and hiding under the blanket when the sun comes up so we can get more sleep. burying ourselves into each other, hands in hair, legs intertwined, refusing to separate until we absolutely have to. i wanna rest my head on a boys chest and hold him tight and sleep and feel safe.

[goremet-chef]

guhh im so bothered rnn (vent/rant)

so... i? idk. ive been out as trans in my house since 2020. my mom doesnt call me dom (sometimes she does if my sibling encourages her to, but she defaults back to my deadname anyways) and ive learned to accept it. i dont think she ever will and its sad for me, the reality that once i start my transition, ill need to just.. leave a lot of my family behind. they think its some rebellious choice like i hate all of them but im more worried about them hating me

my mom says shes supportive but is actively right wing, shes having an inner battle with her ideologies, i know that. i can tell by how she talks about homeless people vs how she talks about us being queer

so. whatever. thats my mom i guess. but for a long time, i wasnt out to my moms husband. i despise him and ive never intentionally started a conversation with him, let alone come out. ive started to not care about what he thinks. i know what he thinks, he thinks gays should die, said it straight to my gay siblings face. okay, cool. doesnt concern me, moms bf is absolutely fucking nothing to me.

to remedy this sort of like... we didnt wanna DEAL with what he might say if he heard both my siblings calling me dom, cuz both of them do, so whenever theyre around they would just refer to my deadname, but i saw it made them cringe, so now everyone calls me 'that one child'

that one, other one, etc etc

no one even calls me my name anymore

it makes me feel so hopeless. ive EXPRESSED it makes me upset but my younger sibling doesnt care (the one most guilty of it), because they dont understand why it upsets me, i guess thats enough reason to keep going

its so dehumanizing to be reduced to actually nothing. i ALREADY have heaps and heaps and HEAPS of identity issues. sometimes it gets so bad i start having crazy ass delusions, sometimes im not even present and its a different part of my mind in my body

its hard enough as is!!! now my family wont call me anything at all

it makes me feel less bad about leaving, but i dont think ill ever leave at this rate

need to start T, change my name, get a job, all in that order. starting T seems impossible at this rate. i.. dont know what to do. i cant keep LIVING like this, because im not living at all

i never leave my house because im too ashamed in how i look, i cant BEAR the thought of anyone else perceiving me as female, i cant fucking do it!!! im so tired. my house is like a prison for me, genuinely.

and my family dont get it, obviously. they think its my choice, im some kind of hermit who doesnt care about being outside because i have internet. they are so fucking wrong. i miss going out, i miss being around people, i miss existing like everyone else, but i just cant do it man. not like this

so it becomes a waiting game, when am i gonna bring up starting it? how do i even move forward once i do? what if she says no? id have to do it on my own but i cant.. i cant even order things for myself without freezing like shutting up will get me out of there, i cant fucking do it

she doesnt even know!! we were in the car together and she was like yknow theres people who cant even make a doctors appointment. what losers.

IM losers, would she have said that if she knew? does she know and decided to say it anyways? i dont know, but its just.. everything seems so hopeless at this point. i want to just give up, accept im not gonna be who i truly am, but man i cant stand being any more miserable

it makes me wanna cry, the only time i get to feel myself how i think i should be is either if i draw something fictitious, or if i spend hours in the mirror making sure i look masculine, my mustache is convincing, etc. AND FOR WHAT? literally for fucking WHAT, because i dont leave the house anyways!!!!! dolled up like i have somewhere to be, like my appearance will get me what i want, when im stuck at home! i got nothing to prove to them, they think what they think

its fucking dreadful. im so scared of my life passing me by, and here i am wasting away in my bedroom for the last 3 years. no progress, nothing. at first, i was scared about even starting T because theres a higher risk of heart disease, but. i dont fucking care if it KILLS me. i dont care!!! if it kills me i dont fucking care im not living the life i want to live anyways. the risk of death is worth it at this point, i mean that so seriously

idk. im just tired, is all. i wish everyone could perceive me the way i dream they would. only time that happens is online, or when im not with my family at all and instead with my friends. but we only hang out like. once in a blue moon

and yknow what? im not even safe then. i remember we were at my friends house for halloween last year (we always meet up). i had my full leatherface costume one, my face was touched up to make it look like the mask. and still. dressed that way, when my friends mom asked me what my name was, i said dom and she was immediately like. "oh, dominique?" no. my name is fucking DOMINIC.

i didnt say anything besides correcting her, but it was such a blow, man. the only time ill be happy is if im closely monitoring every single thing i do, to make sure i dont appear feminine at all. no matter how i look, now matter how deep my voice is. miserable. why would anyone think that id choose this

[hihereami]

tmi but we suspect my mom is having some sort of psychiatric breakdown and the atmosphere at home is exactly as hopeless and tiring and weird as it sounds. 

[transgaysex]

man...

[kyoryu]

do you have any headcanons about sashanne high school breakup? i know it sucks thinking about the canon end timeline but that little mention in your demi anne comic was intriguing 👀

HEH...you know how anne says we can deal with our emotional baggage later and then never do. sorry for more amphibia criticism but the way they handled sashannes second reunion was so shitty and undramatic it pisses me off how they sweep everything under the rug and just make characters be happy and makeup like nothing.

so... heh. they get together i like to think at 15/16 bc they like each other ofc and have been stuck in this cutesy flirty banter ever since commanding together the rebellion, but there is also all these bottled up emotions that they never brought up and it goes like this:

when they get together as teens they like the version of each other they believe they know. sasha likes anne but when anne is now the emotionally distant one she's unfulfilled. sure anne is affectionate and shes great to her but whenever sasha tries to get the convo onto a more serious ground of Hey i Really REALLY Like You anne tends to play stupid and desperately makes her way out of the situation. heh. turns out dying and getting ripped from you the chance of ever being a child again because you know whats after death and specifically after YOUR death, leaving u with a nihilistic view of life where u just smile through it no matter what, isnt good for a highschool relationship with a newly reformed, takes everything seriously and wants to talk about everything, sasha waybright! thank u amphibia writers anne is 1000% okay after all this and she leads a completely normal happy life doesnt she!

and on annes end. she's deep down, waiting for sasha to betray her at one point. its kind of like, anne is not as committed to the rs as sasha is bc anne's emotionally disconnected. she refuses to think of herself and her own feelings which drives her to never face the fact she has trust issues, which in return means she never truly processed everything sasha did in amphibia and how thats deeply changed their relationship forever

and that all blows up in their faces eventually. sasha snaps at anne for acting like theyre still just friends, anne snaps at sasha for acting like nothing ever happened, sasha snaps at anne, SAD, bc how dare u bring that up, not only was it YEARS ago but i apologized and u forgave me, i thought we were pass that, and anne snaps back at sasha surprised and upset with HERSELF because sasha is right, but also this situations making anne think of things she doesnt want to think and its too difficult. and they break up.

and yknow... bonus points for prom. one or two years after breakup. they decide to go together because somehow it feels weird to go with anyone else. by that point theyre barely talking at all so its surprising when sasha approaches anne to ask her but annes like yknow what. wouldnt have it any other way.

so they go to prom together and theyre cutesy and have Moments and dance together and have almost kiss moment and YOU KNOW WHAT. THEY FIGHT AGAIN. for the DAMN SAME STUFF its like a speedrun of that dating period they have but in 1 night and its the prom and god i love these vibes of shitty prom. it also adds, popular hc of marcy wanting to go to prom with sasha and anne so bad but shes away so she cant fulfill this dream. i see ur "marcy travels to la for prom and sashannarcy all go together" and i bring you "sashanne go together and fight, marcy is away and alone, no one gets what they fucking want" why? bc it is more interesting to think about and im tired of making these characters act like nothing fucking happened

amphibia was not just an adventure that is over with. shit happened and it affects them in the long run. anyways. what was the question

[marinetteplztakeabreak]

chloe in my adrininogami roommates au

under the cut bc its a little long (1500 words of notes about chloe in this au)

ADRININOGAMI ROOMATES AU RECAP: its not really an au its just a timejump, Adrien Nino and Kagami are all like 18-19 and roommates, hawkmoth is still out there and lb and cn still dont know each others’ identities, Nino and Kagami know each others’ secret identities but don’t know Adrien’s and he doesn’t know theirs, Nino is at university while Adrien and Kagami are just taking a gap year and working minimum wage jobs and honestly they are all thriving and bffs

Chloe is a music major

At the same university as Nino

i have very little knowledge of the universities of Paris so this is going to be partially based on the American system, im sorry but youre going to have to suspend your disbelief real quick

so the university has a rule where first year students have to live on campus in the dorms

Nino escaped this rule because he is a goshdarn music nerd and quest for knowlege cannot be stopped

There wasn’t even an AP Music Theory class at his high school when he started there but he was like “whats up guys i have self-confidence now and i think it would be pretty nifty if we had this class” and then talked to teachers and convinced a bunch of his friends to sign up for it so now its a class

And thats the only AP Music class and he still wanted to learn,,, so he just,,, started taking online college courses,,, in music theory,,, for fun,,,, the absolute nerd <3

he will ramble excitedly about music history to anyone who will listen and you cant even be upset bc he is so energetic about this

All of this is to say that, by the time he graduated high school, he had already completed a bunch of college classes, so he got to enter university as a sophomore, which is how he is living off campus with adrien and kagami

Chloe, however, is a freshman, so shes gotta live on campus in the freshman dorms and have a roommate

her roommate, by the way, is Juleka

Chloe has calmed down significantly by this time and sucks a lot less. She and Juleka are not friends by any account, but basically, when they were signing up for roommates, they were both like “whelp this is better than rooming with a total stranger, i wont talk to you or bother you if you dont talk to me”

chloe and juleka have not actually spoken to each other since school started,, they pretty much stay out of the dorm room unless they are sleeping and then they stay on their side of the room and do not make eye contact and dont touch each others stuff

and chloe is totally fine with this

just kidding, hahaha, she is sad and lonely and wants to make friends but is terrible at it,,, her models for friendship include Adrien who she knows she messed up with completely and the best thing she can do now for their relationship is avoid him so she doesnt mess it up more,, and Sabrina, who is also refusing to speak to her now and basically taught chloe that the way to do friendship is to like? do their homework or something??

(juleka is vibing and living her best life btw, shes just also an introvert and only goes to the dorm when she is tired and needs to refresh and also chloe is the one acting like they shouldnt talk)

SO,,, chloe is a music major bc she thinks its pretty nifty and fun and also because she is trying to avoid anything to do with her parents,,, she has reached the point where like “be a dissapointment to my parents” is like,, her life goal,,, which is kinda a “good for her” situation and kinda a “holy heck plz get her some therapy situation”

wow we’ve got a bunch of backstory but we are finally to the point of this post

Chloe has several classes with Nino and she keeps accidentally flocking to him because she already knows him from high school and he has such good vibes

Nino is kind of just trying to avoid her,, he doesnt HATE her,, but,, it is chloe,, yknow

but then they get paired up for a group project and the group meets at nino’s apartment, and adrien is not in the building whenever chloe is there, on purpose,, they will be friends again eventually but their friendship is taking a little bit of a break and adrien is still learning how to have boundaries so he’s just doing what’s best for his mental health

chloe is totally fine with this and doesnt miss him at all

just kidding she is lying

BUT

you know who IS just chilling in the apartment while chloe is there

kagami

who is now like 19 and having some actual self confidence and happiness and who is chilling in her apartment with nino, one of her best friends

and chloe gets through the first group meetup at nino’s house and doesn’t spent any time just staring at kagami who’s chilling reading books in the corner (yes she does)

chloe is actually trying her hardest to be nice to the group members and make friends and prove that she can be a good person and a hard worker but she has very little social skills or work ethics skills and is having complicated emotions about adrien and hasnt even realized it yet but she is falling HARD for kagami,

all that is to say that chloe is a little bit distracted from the group project

but anyway they meet up again and this time chloe has done a ton of research and prep beforehand bc she doesnt want 2 be caught offguard made to look like a fool again and everyone is like what the heck, since when does she study things?

and anyway the project goes pretty great

but then

chloe has a goshdarn crying breakdown

because she is experiencing too many emotions all at once

the combination of just,,, university coursework is stressful and living without servants for the very first time in her life and parental issues and not having friends and also literally everything is just aaaa

so she starts crying in her dorm while doing homework while juleka is there but she literally forgets that juleka is there bc juleka is kind of a cryptid

and juleka just kinda stares at her for a minute and then is like “u good”

and chloe tries to pretend shes not startled and is like “haha yeah its fine”

and juleka is like “have u considered getting a tutor”

and chloe, who is stupid, is like “hmm i should ask nino to tutor me but only at his place and only when kagami is home and i should make sure that i look super cute and i need to study beforehand so that i look cool and smart in front of kagami,, i mean,, for no reason at all i just think this is a good idea”

she talks to nino and nino is like “ok i guess i can help tutor you but u have to actually make an effort and also stick to a schedule so youre not there when adriens there bc we are respecting his boundaries and also you need to-”

and chloe is like “great perfect done”

and then she actually does everything nino says

so basically

she ends up passing all of her classes and making friends

literally just because she is too stupid to actually try to talk to kagami

they literally do not have any conversations other than like “hey, whats up?” “nothing much lol” for like,,, an entire year

also chloe does not admit to herself that she has a crush on kagami for that entire time either

meanwhile adrien and nino and kagami are all a little confused bc chloe keeps flirting at nino??? and adrien is like “im pretty sure she likes girls but idk???” and nino keeps being like “hey chloe what’s up, i just got back from hanging out with my amazing girlfriend alya who i am very in love with,, and who is my girlfriend,, who i am dating”

and chloe has literally no idea why he is doing this but continues to flirt at him and subconciously hope that kagami will catch some of her flirting vibes and falls in love with her

so basically

they are all stupid

BUT Chloe and Nino do become actual friends and chloe actually respects him for the amazing wonderful smart talented kind person that he is and he helps her make some new friends and they get to the point where they are a super great study group and she’ll listen to all his homework assignments and proofread some of them when its like finals cramming time and they are supporting each other and their friendship is good

[pocparks]

just shooting shit here(this is going to be some real unorganized stream of consciousness, word salad nonsense but bear with me i just need to get my thoughts out or ill fuckin explode)

but i think what makes ironwoods plan /feel/ so god awful was how fast he was willing to abandon mantle when push came to shove

maybe they could have shown him mulling over the plan for the whole volume, maybe during the “i trust you all :)” phase when he was telling the team all his plans he could tell team rwby about it but have it be like something thats always been there(from the beginning of atlas) as an absolute worst case scenario plan, to evacuate all the citizens of mantle into atlus and shoot the whole thing into space using the relic, and throw in a “i hope we never have to use that plan but i just wanted to let you all know about it because i trust you :)” yknow wink wink nudge nudge

have the volume go as planned, (maybe have ironwood show more concern for mantle so yknow people could trust the character you want them to trust, have that be the reason why he goes crazy trying to balance his plan to tell the world with the struggle to keep mantle safe while watts and tyrion fuck around on the streets and the council+jacques put him in a headlock) then when salem shows up and calls ironwood a bitch and rwby reveal that they didnt trust him until everything fell apart, have him snap and call for the space protocol, when ace ops go to order the evacuation of mantle into atlas have him go “its too late we have to go now” or something (maybe salem said she was on her way during that skype call)

then when rwby oppose him like “we cant just leave the people of mantle :(“, instead of “no you see we HAVE to sacrifice the less fortunate!” it could be a “well whats your plan? you told me she couldnt be killed and you waited until AFTER it was too late so im stuck with the actual worst case scenario ” or something along those lines, or have his focus be “i need to get the relics far a fuckin way from big bad to avoid the shit you told me about and the easiest way to do that on short notice is shoot atlas into space” or something

idk,,, anything that doesnt make ironwood into a heartless monster of an antagonist because we really dont need any more of those especially while the ones we have are just sitting pretty in some room twirling their thumbs waiting for shit to do, and rwby dont even have a damn plan, and they never have had one since ozpin went into the timeout corner, and they never bothered to think up a plan /on screen/ about what to do with salem, ruby’s eye beams are strong but unreliable when it comes to big grimm (unless she went the oscar route of self improvement and trained them off screen) so staying an fighting as just 1 and 3/4 of a huntsman squd is dumb

and before anyone says anything about boot licking ironwoods plan fucking sucks shit both ways, idk why people are so adamant on defending his decision to leave mantle to die, and leaving atlas vulnerable to the whims of whatever the hell is up in space for however long he thinks salem will wait for without any renewable food sources. but hey at least it will get the relic(s) away from salem, which /in theory/ is the goal, to keep petty and pettier from zaping the earth out of existence (AGAIN) its an idiotic plan and hes really not doing it with keeping the relics from salem as a priority but its still a plan and still better than what actually happens (that being the bad guys getting a relic and only 1 and 3/4 of a hunstman squad vs every grimm ever and nemesis herself)

meanwhile rwbyjnr’s plans seem to be to fuck up any and all plans they become involved with and spend 0 time thinking of what they should do in regards to salem and cross their fingers that the Plot will get them through it and its tiring because i cant root for anyone because no one knows what the fuck theyre doing not even the centuries old constantly reincarnating wise old man chracter knows what hes doing and the writers dont seem to think this is a problem

it would be one thing if in the office ruby gave ironwood a plan maybe a “hey my eyes are grimm repellent, maybe we can buy some time to get as many people of mantle into atlas as we can and then shoot that up into space” and have ironwood say no to that, (or have ruby being up a plan way earlier that gets shot down in favour of amity comm tower) but they just get upset, incapacitate some of the best fighters that could help fight off salem and her giant snow globe and hop on an airship to go ???sightseeing???? idk where they’re going, to mantle?? so they can watch people die and feel sad and blame ironwood when their lack of foresight and inflexible sense of justice has doomed not just mantle but also atlas

maybe instead of cuddling penny they could yknow freaking talk about what went so catastrophically wrong?? have ruby say “if only we told him earlier we could have saved all those people!” or something thats not nothing can we see the characters talk about whats going on after the fact for once havent they had enough of sad looks and cuddles, can they talk about their mistakes? how shit ironwood is? where the hell qrow and oscar are(not even one failed call on a scroll just sad smiles and cuddles im sickkkkkk)?? what theyre gonna do now??? something thats NOT NOTHING its so unfulfilling to watch a series where you’re not rooting for everyone but my damn middle school nostalgia and sunk cost fallacy wont let me just drop this damn series im sick and then all of that do watch salem ride in on a glass marble with giant cutout in her dress and an awful boob contour and it really feels like a tragedy that didnt need to get as bad as it does and god the more i think about it the more i really dont like it and hope the next volume saves it

[spidercrimes]

if it's not too much to write, how about All even numbers for the OC asks for either character of your choice! or both if you're feelin wild whatever works : ]

wheezes this took so long but im finally done holy shit

2. Do they have any titles? How did they get them?

Echo doesn’t have any official titles, and isn’t really planning on getting any, unless Champion of Sune counts?

4. What is their relationship with their parents? What’s a good and bad memory with them? Did they know both parents?

Echo has a very good relationship with her moms! To their knowledge, things were a bit tense after leaving Ivydome, but plenty of letters and visiting when they could helped with smoothing over their relationship. A good memory would be when her moms taught Echo how to bake! They can really only bake cupcakes and cookies but theyre like. Hella good ones. They dont really have any bad memories with/of their parents, since like. They will forcibly forget or repress anything that upsets them, as long as it only affected them. If the memory is something bad that affected others it will linger for however long Echo deems necessary(read: an extremely long time)

6. What were they like at school? Did they enjoy it? Did they finish? What level of higher education did they reach? What subjects did they enjoy? Which did they hate?

They were there and graduated fantasy high school what more do you want from them jkdxxjndk.  They started working at the local sweets shop after school, so no higher level of education here! They like history a bit, but that’s about it tbh!

8. Did they have pets as a child? Do they have pets as an adult? Do they like animals?

Yes! Echo had a pet cat back at Ivydome with her moms, and before the campaign she didn’t really have the money to keep another, so they settled for feeding and playing with the stray cats in Summervale.

10. Do they like children? Do children like them? Do they have or want any children? What would they be like as a parent? Or as a godparent/babysitter/ect?

Hmmm, Echo doesn’t mind children?? but there’s only so long they can be around them before she gets overwhelmed. Children like them well enough since Echo is always up for playing songs or messing around with cantrips. Echo would be the fun parent/godparent/babysitter, but. Please dont make them look after children they dont want any.

12. What is their favourite food?

Give my child spicy noodles or give him death

14. Do they have any specific memories of food/a restaurant/meal?

Their first cake made without supervision was. A disaster to put it lightly since someone was feeling ambitious.(it turned out like rubber and after that he was too flustered n frustrated to focus so everything else turned out badly too) So they dont bother with that anymore! Cake mistakes who i dont know her sdkjjkdbs. So half the time they pass by anything with some type of airy sponge cake they cringe lololol

16. Do they collect anything? What do they do with it? Where do they keep it?

She had a rock and shiny things collection back at Summervale! They’re mostly for decoration, although some with certain textures are used for stimming. Some rocks are kept on shelves, but most are stored in cool jars to save space

18. What’s their favourite genre of: books, music, tv shows, films, video games and anything else

Echo is a sucker for romance novels and fun, upbeat music! Idk if video games, films, or video games exist in-universe, but if they did, they’d like dramas and baking shows, rpgs, and more character focused games like nitw

20. Do they like musicals? Music in general? What do they do when they’re favourite song comes?

They love music, and they’d like musicals too! They will grab their lute and play along if their favorite song came on, and if nobody was around then maybe they’d sing too. Maybe. 

22. What are their favourite insults to use? What do they insult people for? Or do they prefer to bitch behind someone’s back?

tbh their go-to insult is calling someone a prick or a bastard, and it’s usually for whenever someone’s done something particularly scummy. Or if someone is just. The Absolute Worst. It’s a leftover habit from when they used to live in Ivydome, but Echo usually sticks to talking shit when the target is. Very far away/not in the area.

24. What is their sleeping pattern like? Do they snore? What do they like to sleep on? A soft or hard mattress?

They try and get around six hours, to varying success, and to their knowledge they dont snore! Echo loves soft things and would prefer to sleep on a soft mattress with So Many blankets and pillows and maybe a cuddle buddy

26. How do they act when they’re happy? Do they sing? Dance? Hum? Or do they hide their emotions?

Fun fact echo does a tounge blep when she’s happy!! They tend to do lil happy claps and bounce up and down in place when they’re really excited, but when it’s a more calm-type of happy he purrs loudly and smiles a lot more than usual! 

28. What is their biggest fear? What in general scares them? How do they act when they’re scared?

He’s claustrophobic and is terrified of being alone again or having to leave people behind even when the situation calls for it. So like. He aint copin too well after the last session! They get very flustered and panicked and freeze when theyre scared

30. Do they exercise? Regularly? Or only when forced? What do they act like pre-work out and post-work out?

Does going on champion quests and running from his problems count as exercise or???

32. What do they dress like? What sorta shops do they buy clothes from? Do they wear the fashion that they like? What do they wear to sleep? Do they wear makeup? What’s their hair like?

Crop tops with long sleeves, shorts, and boots make up most of their wardrobe and they love it. Theyd go to like the fantasy equivalent of marshalls i think? Somewhere with good deals and a lot of options. Overlarge shirts, tank top crop tops, and more shorts make up their pjs. They dont really wear makeup, mostly bc they touch their face a lot and it feels weird the whole time, but they wouldnt be opposed to wear a lil bit every now and then! Their hair is floofy and a bit of a controlled mess since they cut it themselves

34. What is their body type? How tall are they? Do they like their body?

Echo is 5’9”/ 175.26 cm! Theyre on the average side i think? Like theyre not super skinny but not fat either so just. Avergae. And yeah, Echo likes their body, theyre so bright! And their horns are so cute and having a tail is very handy and claw maintenance can be a bit of a pain but like. Aesthetic am i right folks

36. What are they good at? What hobbies do they like? Can they sing?

Hes good at playing the lute and generally being very cute and giving out good vibes, and he likes baking and playing music! They can sing, but really only do that when theyre playing their lute ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

38. What do they admire in others? What talents do they wish they had?

Echo admires passion and creativity the most, and dont let anyone from the party know but he wishes he could be just. A bit smarter and know what to say + ask. Theyd also really like to be able to make a decent genoise sponge too like theyre not picky

40. Do they like energy drinks? Coffee? Sugary food? Or can they naturally stay awake and alert?

Theyre a tea drinker all the way, and arent the biggest fan of sweet things. He used to use more tart or mellow flavors when baking. They def arent alert after being tired for a while, and will space out a bit

42. What are their goals? What would they sacrifice anything for? What is their secret ambition?

No secret ambitions here, Echo is an open book(unless they roll high on deception dvdjxb)! Becoming Sune’s champion, making a decent sponge cake, and protecting his friends with his life/in any way they can are all their current goals. Echo doesn’t care too much if they get hurt, so physical well-being and maybe mental are things they wouldn't mind sacrificing, but as a whole they don’t really want to think about what they’d have to give up. He’ll burn that bridge when he gets to it. 

44. What is their favourite season? Type of weather? Are they good in the cold or the heat? What weather do they complain in the most?

If its cold, wet, or humid echo is not a happy camper lol. They prefer summer and the beginning of fall the most, and sunny days with lots of puffy white clouds are the best! They think its fun watching the clouds shadows on the ground. They’re better in hot weather than cold, since clothes for that type of weather are easier to dress for and they dont have to account for their tail or horns as much

46. Do they make a good first impression? Does their first impression reflect them accurately? How do they introduce themselves?

God i hope they make a good first impression im dying over here xjkxdk but honestly it depends! They try to make a good first impression and i think they usually do? But if theyve just finished with a job w the gang or theyre just. So tired they wont really introduce themselves at all.  Its pretty accurate of how they are, and their go-to greeting is “I’m Echo Barquiel, a pleasure to meet you dearie~” 

48. Do they enjoy any parties? If so what kind? Do they organise the party or just turn up? How do they act? What if they didn’t want to go but were dragged along by a friend?

In theory they’d like parties but being around so many people with that much noise for an unknown amount of time would not be. Ideal so smaller get-togethers with friends would be the most enjoyable! Echo doesnt really have the uh, space to host anything so theyd just turn up to other’s parties. Theyd be in a constant state of switching between ‘holy shit im so gay’ and ‘oh my god theres so many people/internal screaming’. If they were dragged to a party, theyd mingle for a leelte bit before stepping out

50. If they could only take one bag of stuff somewhere with them: what would they pack? What do they consider their essentials?

A bedroll, waterskin, food supplies, rope, knives, a lute, matches, money- yknow regular survival stuff!

[bazzledazzled]

I’m not going to lie to you I am 100% pulling these headcanons from the spam of messages i sent @waywardpadaleski​ but I saw Voltron Hogwarts AUs floating around and I decided to make headcanons because I love this idea ive also doodled stuff and may post some or write something just not rn

OKAY SO

pretty much the houses just go with their lions— but lance is special snowflake im sorry i know i sound like one of those uber annoying lance stans that shove da boi down everyones throats i cant help it i love him but bare with me this makes sense

Okay so Keith is in Gryffindor because ofc he would

Pidge is Slytherin

Hunk is Hufflepuff

Allura is totally a Ravenclaw

What about Lance, you ask? Well u know how JK Rowling said that there’s things called “Hat Stalls” where people took longer than 5 min to get sorted???

Ye well Lance is one of THOSE

It would work with canon if you think about it because he kinda is stuck between the red lion and the blue lion and like-- I know keef is the same way with the black lion but shush

SO ANYWAYS

the sorting hats dilemma is that he’s smart and has the means to excel in Ravenclaw, but at the same time he’s outrageously brave like a Gryffindor

(MY BOI IS SMART FITE ME)

So the hat doesn’t know what to put him in

Then the sorting hat comes to the conclusion that while he could do great in Ravenclaw, he wouldn’t reach his full potential unless he was a Gryffindor (*COUGH* LIKE CANON)

Sooooo-- Pidge is like a year or two behind Hunk, Lance, and Keith because y’know, shes younger and stuff and she kinda gets into the group because of her older brother

THATS RIGHT MATTS HERE

So Matt is a Ravenclaw and him and Shiro are besties ofc

(Shiros Gryffindor sorry I forgot to mention it)

Matt was also a Hat Stall because when i was thinking about his house i couldn’t decide between Ravenclaw, Slytherin, or Gryffindor

But he’s Ravenclaw cuz it fits in with an Adashi thing im gonna bring up later

ANYWAYS

Shiro is also Keith’s older brother, they’re not biological siblings, its just Keefs dad was friends with shiros parents and when he passed away the Shiroganes adopted him 

Shiro is ANNOYED because Keith and Lance are always fighting with each other in the commons and he just wants to read his book in peace

Now here comes the Adashi

Okay okay so Adam is Ravenclaw

I know we barely know anything about Adam (*glares at s7*) BUT based on stuff and how the fanon Adam is, I’m saying he’s Ravenclaw

So anyways

Let’s get to Quidditch because that’s part of the Adashi part of this AU

Keef is a Gryffindor Seeker because like-- he go vroom

I lowkey am making Lance a Keeper not only cuz he would be good at it but also cuz of those cheesy shirts that say things like “He’s a Keeper” and “She’s a Catch” 

Shiro is a Chaser

Pidge and Hunk I think would be Beaters???? Idk

OH! James Griffin is also a Slytherin Seeker byeeee

Adam is the Ravenclaw Keeper

Headcanon is if theres one thing Lance and Adam have in common, its that they can make people flustered very easily 

So ya know what Adam does, much to Shiro’s annoyance???

He flirts with him

Whenever they have games that are Ravenclaw vs. Gryffindor Adam will flirt with Shiro, winking at him, yelling stuff across the field, making Shiro so flustered he can’t throw straight (pun intended)

One time Adam gets Shiro so flustered he drops the ball

Matt, a Beater, high fives him

OH! Also Allura is a Chaser and she’s like the best Chaser in the school FITE ME

Okay thats enough of quidditch 

Okay so as for family lineage and stuff

Shiro, Lance, and Hunk are muggleborns

They just are

Shiro’s parents knew about Magic because of keef and were surprised when they found out Shiro was a wizard

Lance is the only wizard in his family and he gets homesick a lot because he’s the only one who goes to Hogwarts and he misses his siblings and stuff

But he always brings niece and nephew home stuff from Hogsmade that he thinks they’ll like 

Hunk, Lance, and Shiro meet because Hogwarts started a club during the summer for Muggleborns where they can meet and talk about concerns with Hogwarts and magic and stuff with other muggleborns that are older

So Lance and Hunk soon become really close friends and Shiro is kinda their advisor and stuff

Anyways

Keith is a Halfblood, which makes sense because i mean he’s half galra on the show so

His mom was a witch, and idk if im going to have her run away for something or die?? I mean I kinda want her to run away cuz of something so they can be reunited but i have no idea what it would be unless this was during the time of harry potter and it had something to do with Voldemort but i kinda want to stay away from all that so ye

Pidge and Matt are purebloods

But they’re not the stuck up purebloods

They’re literally the Weasleys 

Sam has a fascination with muggle technology that Pidge and Matt share

So like, they have a lot of fancy tech

Pidge and Matt snuck a DS on campus and play Zelda at meals

Allura is probably a Pureblood but shes way less snooty, maybe even compared to her parents

As for teachers

Coran is Herbology teacher or something???

Alfor is Defense against the Dark Arts maybe??? I don’t know either him or Zarkon 

Haggar is obviously the potions teacher

ANYWAYS

Everyone hates Lotor cuz his parents are teachers and he’s a teachers pet

But back to Haggar in potions

So she’s like the slytherin head thing or whatever they were

so yknow she’s biased

and it doesnt help that her son is also slytherin

(also Zarkon is a Gryffindor sorryyyyy)

(This also could play into keith or lance’s story by them being compared to Zarkon or something and it unsettling them)

(This just in-- I think Zarkon should be the voldemort)

(oh shoot im getting sidetracked with imagining zarkon as voldemort and lance as harry potter)

(help)

ANYWAYS

So ofc she sees that Lance and Keith are always at each others throat

and makes them potions partnets

because it makes it easier for them to get in trouble because they keep fighting and then she can take points from gryffindor 

ANYWAYS

The one day they are tasked with making Amortentia, right??

Oh god this is so mcfreaking cliche im sorry

So Keef and Lonce are there, both tired from studying or something so already they’re cranky and half asleep

So they’re making the potion right?

And lance just coughs, a look of disgust on his face

“What?” Keef says. Lance plugs his nose.

“U stink, Keith.” And throughout potions class Lance keeps complaining that Keith smells really bad or something or he used too much cologne idk

Ofc like Pidge is in that class and shes snickering

Lance turns to her like “WHAT IS IT PIDGE” 

She asks him if he knows what the potion is supposed to do

He’s just like “It makes people fall in love with u.”

“Yes but what else?” Both keith and Lance stare at her blankly. She explains that when u smell it you smell what u love most

Both keef and lances eyes widen

For the first time in forever they’re quite the entire period

Keith has a gay panic

Lance has a bi panic

they are disasters

Shiro confronts pidge after that day

“Pidge what did u do to keef and lonce they’re broken”

Pidge is all like, “Excuse me????”

“They’re being nice to each other.” 

Hunk, who is also there, just snorts

“Pls explain this to me,” Shiro says, exasperated

Pidge explains the Amortentia scene

Shiro just laughs because of course they were in love with each other

(it lowkey reminds him of him and Adam)

(okay now i have theories that the reason why they made Adam shiro’s boyfriend is because its meant to mirror OTHER ships in voltron *cough* KLANCE and its foreshadowing or something i mean adam does look like lance and shiro and keith are sorta similar)

(shut up candy back to the AU)

Hunk admits that Lance has had a crush on keeth for like ever but he keeps saying its just a rivalry thing

Actual conversation between the two:

“And what’s up with his hair?? It’s like straight out of the 80′s and he has all the bangs over his eyes like an EMO like why is he trying to hide his eyes?” Lance blushes because he’s thinking about how beautiful Keefs eyes are. “Like why? Why is his hair like that i dont understand?? And what does he do to it why is it so soft???”

“You’ve touched his hair?”

“Yeah I was trying to see if I’m taller than him yet” Hunk was just confused but then Lance kept talking about keiths hair and he let it slip when it was like, almost 3am that keiths hair made him look pretty and lance would never be able to make that look good on himself, then immediately said something about the one time keef blew something up in first year because hes an idiot as a coverup

So hunk has known for some time

Even when lance didn’t know

So for the next couple weeks keith and lance act kinda weird around each other

because they don’t know how to handle feelings

they mostly avoid each other, standing on opposite ends of the room and glaring at each other

but of course that doesnt help them at all because for some reason they share a room

(oh my god they were roommates)

The rest of the boys in the room are angry because of all the sexual tension its giving them anxiety and they started sleeping in the commons

I actually have no idea who the other three boys would be because one of them couldnt be shiro because hes older and everyone else is in different houses so

At one point keith just blurts “Whats wrong with you?”

Lance gets all defensive because he takes it in a different way than Keith meant and thought Keith was saying he was flawed or something and he was broken and...

heres the langst

Lance just starts to get upset and is yelling saying nothing is wrong with him and he almost starts to cry because he’s just so confused and doesn’t know whats going on and he feels like hes not good enough for Gryffindor and

He has a lot of emotions

And he says all this, starting to ramble through tears, pouring all of his emotions out

Keef is shook

he doesn’t know what to do Lance never acted like this in front of him before and he’s never seen lance like this, so self conscious and doubting himself 

Keith doesn’t know how lance could even think these things because in his eyes-- lance is perfect

Lance has always been so much better at magic than he was

and He’s so confident and such a good Keeper 

He gingerly touches Lance’s shoulder. 

“Lance I--” Keith doesn’t know what words to say, but apparently he doesn’t need to say any

Lance wraps his arms around him, burying his face in his shoulder, sniffling

Keith is surprised at first because u know keef

He doesn’t know how to react when someone hugs him

He gently hugs lance back, resting his head on Lances and running his fingers through his hair

Lance calms down, his breathing slowing and seeming more relaxed

when he does, keith tries his best to tell him how great he thinks lance is and how hes jealous and all that

Lance pulls away, rubbing his eyes. 

“You mean it?” Keith nods solemnly, not looking at Lance. Lance touches his cheek, causing him to look back up, his brows knit together in confusion

Lance doesn’t know why, but he kisses him

(*klance fangirl in me starts screaming*)

and just??? the moment feels perfect to both of them? This was someone they always thought of as a rival, were always jealous of, and were always thinking about. They never truely understood their feelings for each other, until now

Shiro doesn’t comment when they walk into the dinning hall the next morning holding hands

But Pidge sure does 

Okay im trying to think of more headcanons involving people other than Shiro, Keith, and Lance because i love all the characters and they deserve attention

Hunk makes friends with two other Hufflepuff girls 

he he he yall know who it is

SHAY AND ROMELLE

MY GURLS

Shay and Romelle have been friends since they were first years and Shay yelled at Lotor for making fun of Romelle

they’ve been besties ever since

Hunk meets Shay and Romelle in Herbology because in like maybe 5th year or something Hufflepuff house was taught Herbology with the Slytherins. Every year before that it was either with Ravenclaw or Gryffindor so he would pair with Lance, Keith, Allura, or Shiro

Pidge was a year or two bellow him so they didn’t have classes together in case u were wondering

For the specific thing they needed a group of three and even though Hunk is a pretty nice guy and can make friends with everyone, everyone sorta had their trio

Because ofc he can find a PARTNER that was left out of their group of three, but suddenly they’re paired off in threes and there’s no sad loner who has no friends. 

Shay and Romelle have an opening in their group

Hunk goes to work with them

They’re honestly the cinnamon roll squad and when Hunk introduces them to his friends Lance and Pidge immediately nickname them that 

Hunk quickly falls in love with Shay

Like deeply in love

He’s always complimenting her and laughing at what she says

Romelle keeps trying to tell Shay that he likes her but Shay just goes “he’s just a nice person, Elle”

The Yule ball comes around ofc

and at this point Lance and Keith are dating

This is probably around.... Sixth year I want to say? 

So here’s the line up 

Keith and Lance go to the dance together

Shiro asks Adam in like this grand way and Adam is just like “wait we weren’t going together before??”

Matt doesn’t have a date but he invites Pidge because she threatened him (she wants to take pictures of Klance and Adashi acting cute and coupley to use as blackmail and Matt supports it)

Hunk starts freaking out because he really really really wants to ask Shay but he doesn’t know how

Lance gives him a pep talk, saying that she obviously likes him of course she’ll say yes

Hunk is still nervous

Lance is all like “C’mon asking your crush out isnt that bad if she says no she says no, but if she says yes then you get an awesome date.” 

“Says the one who had a crush on his boyfriend since second year and covered it up as a rivalry.” Lance looks offended.

“You need to stop hanging out with Pidge.” 

Lance decides to be Hunks wingman and starts asking Shay things like “You planning on going to the Yule Ball?” and “What do you think of Hunk?” He sees that she is very much interested and repots this to Hunk

He helps Hunk come up with a way to ask her

And its like the sweetest thing Romelle is in on it and she gives some stupid excuse as to why she cant study for herbology with them 

then her and lance hide behind a bookshelf, giggling

Hunk gets super flustered

But he manages to ask her

Shay also gets really flustered

But says yes

oof okay thats three of my big ships canon now for the fourth. 

When Hunk first introduces Allura to Romelle, her first thought is “Her. I want to date Her.” 

Now Lance and Allura have already come out to each other as bi disasters

It actually happened when Lance got with Keith and they were talking about him, doing facials (they take care of their skin with each other fite me) 

And Lance is just like “Yeah so I guess I like guys and girls” and allura is like “YOU CAN DO THAT” and lance is like “yeah????” and hes not sure if shes being biphobic or what and hes scared for like 0.1 second

and then allura just goes “Oh my god lonce i think i like guys and girls too”

And then they just start laughing

I guess I should also mention that they dated at one point too???

I don’t think it would’ve been super long, but probably around 3rd year they dated and thats actually probably how Allura got introduced to the Squad??

Lance first saw her when he finally joined the Gryffindor Quidditch team 

He got picked to be a Keeper the second year

So their first game is against ravenclaw

And he’s pretty good for the most part

And then all of a sudden he sees allura flying towards him and she looks so beautiful and how can she be so beautiful and--

She just scored a goal

and he was staring dumbly at her

So Lance and Allura’s relationship kind of developed like it did in the show with Lance flirting with her and Allura being annoyed to them becoming friends and eventually mutual crush

Allura’s actually the one to ask Lance out

They date for a while and theyre actually a really cute couple

(I may be a hardcore Klancer but I do find Allurlance cute on the occasion)

But after a bit... it kinda fades away?? I don’t know they just start to feel like when they kiss its not... not how they thought it would be??

They slowly start to realize that they kinda just want to be friends, not boyfriend and girlfriend

It just adds stress that they don’t want and they want to be able to tell each other anything without having to worry about stuff

so they break up soon after they start dating

sadly

but they dont?? feel too broken up about it???

The feeling was mutual

Plus they like each other much more as friends than romantic partners

They’re like the ultumate brotp 

Now they give each other facials every thursday

anyways

so allura finds out that she has a crush on Romelle

and who does she go to?

Ofc its lance hes a successful bi with a boyfriend

So he pretty much teaches her how to flirt

like seriously he teaches her how to flirt

And Allura makes it her duty to flirt with Romelle at every possibly oppertunity

Making Romelle freak out because how is she supposed to read this does she want to date Allura or????

They don’t really go any further for a while, its just allura slipping in little things every now and again or blowing kisses at romelle in the stands as she scores a goal

When the Yule ball rolls around, both Allura and Romelle dont have dates (Lotor asked Allura to the dance because they kissed one time in a game of spin the bottle and she responded with judoflipping him)

But they have fun

Everyone has fun actually

Its amazing and fluffy

(i feel like i should write a snapshot of this so i can finally write a fic that isnt centered around klance)

And a slow song comes on

Hunk and Shay awkwardly dance with each other, blushing brightly

Lance and Keith have their heads pressed together, Lance kissing Keith’s nose as they dance and making keith so flustered he stumbles and they both fall to the floor laughing

Adam and Shiro are that couple everyone is jealous of because theyre so perfect?? Like they have matching outfits and they dance gracefully and they kiss at just the right moments??

Pidge and Matt are god knows where probably videotaping the whole thing

And Allura kinda jokingly goes, “Well I guess then we should dance too.” And Romelle surprises her by taking her hand, pulling her onto the dancefloor

and freaking allura is actually really flustered and she’s blushing, having a hard time looking at Romelle

(romelle is having a hard time looking at her to fsajndvjhaio)

They’re both blushing. 

At the end of the song theyre much closer to each other than they started

They look up at each other

And then Romelle squeezes her eyes tight and kisses allura

It barely lasts for a second

Allura is shook

Romelle is in Lesbian Painc

Allura is in Bi Panic

Nobody seems to have noticed

but both girls are dying

And then allura just timidly asks, “Can you-- can you do that again?”

Pidge walks up to them kissing and just goes, “Oh thank god I thought I was going to have to force you two to kiss”

Because pidge oversees everything and knows everyones crushes that theyre too stupid to see

I feel bad for pidge i don’t really know what big moments she should have???

I feel like shes a trouble maker though

Not like cruel pranks or something 

But she likes to play jokes on people

A lot of the times that person is Lance

A lot of the time Keith is in on it

I also feel like eventually Allura and Romelle start to join her??

She recruits them for some big thing

Idk what

Its probably like a surprise for either Klance’s anniversary or Adashi’s 

And they love this way of life

Romelle betrays the cinnamon roll squad and goes to the dark side

Also a little more about pidge

She was almost a Hat Stall

Her two houses were Slytherin and Ravenclaw

But at like 4 min and 43 seconds the hat announced slytherin

her family is actually a mix of slytherins and ravenclaws

her dad and brother are ravenclaws

her mom is slytherin

OH AND BEFORE I LEAVE

Lances rivalry with Keith started because Keith bought the last of the candy he wanted on the train

And during like 7th year when they’re cuddling or something and Keith is like “why did u start this rivalry” and lance says it’s because he took the candy and Keith is SHOOK and goes “I would have shared if u asked”

and yeah i may add but heres most of the headcanons i came up with

[tumblunni]

Ok what fuckin sucks even more than that is seeing people give tumblr user ihatecispeople shit JUST for his name being ihatecispeople. Despite the fact his entire blog is full of actual good analysis of transphobic shit cis people have sent him so its pretty clear WHY he's saying "i hate cis people" and he means these ones doing these shit. Its like how literally any damn minority cant say "ugh i hate [majority]" withput clarifying that they menat"i hate the members of this majority that are hurting me and do not hate everyone in the majority because i believe the category they were born as is biologiclly inferior". Even though its CLEARLY APPARANT thats what they goddamn mean, when they say "i hate cis people" DIRECTLY AFTER getting hate mail from a transphobic cis person. Its nuts how cis people (oh im sorry SPECIFICALLY ONLY CERTAIN CIS PEOPLE) will bend over backwards to say that a single trans person stating an unsatisfactarily specific statement equals cisphobia is real. Because that totally equals being hate crimed and societally oppressed by trans people!! Like do they really fuckin think that the only crime transphobes commit is posting privately on a blog somewhere the single sentence "i hate trans people". Which, by the way, is COMPLETELY DIFFERENT to saying "i hate cis people" cos they fuckin said it first!! Like i already said, trans people are just saying they hate cis people WHO ARE BEING TRANSPHOBIC TOWARDS THEM AND THREATENING THEIR GODDAMN LIVES while transphobes have no goddamn reason provoking them to hate trans people except, yknow, ACTUALLY HATING US ALL AS A CLASS AND BELIEVIBG WE'RE BIOLOGICALLY WRONG. Retorting to a goddamn thing doesnt make you 'just as bad' and somehow thinking the same thing in reverse. It just means youre pissed off at being treated like shit and not everyone can expend so much effort to constantly check themselves to make all their vent posts Perfectly Correct And Clarified, while theyre fuckin crying and fearing for their safety. Especially when the goddamn thibg IS perfectly clear and its just transphobes purposely playing dumb to try and paint us as Just As Bad to sway people on the fence over to their side...

Also fuckin hell people reblog shit from blogs called stuff like griffinmcelroy'spisskink and all sorts of other stupid names without going 'oh op is automatically invalid cos they really believe and support that thing...' And there's sooooo many blogs with names including the F and D slurs yet its only the Q one thats treated like its so unreclaimable that someone merely having it in their blog header makes them automatically wrong on everything...

Gahhh its just so frustrating having to be held to a super high standard and be super patient over-explaining everything without ever getting mad yet at the same time a cis person saying actual transphobic shit gets the benefit of the doubt cos oh hey we can reinterpret that to maybe not be bad. Like they dont even need to spend all the time we do clarifying our every move, they just get it taken on good faith that it was all a misunderstanding no matter wjat! And again trans people havw to write fuckin huge detailed essays explaining every damn aspect of why the thibg was bigoted in order to get it recognised. And even then tehyre more likely to get hate than get an apology! Its just like no matter what you fuckin do, transphobes are gonna be all "uhhhh i cant be bpthered to do the research/listen to you/remember what you said last time/use basic reading comprehension skills/give you the basic benefit of the doubt as a human being/put in ANY EFFORT AT ALL INTO THIS CONVERSATION", and so many "on the fence" people will just be like "yes this is perfectly okay" while at the same time supporting those transphobes grilling trans people over every damn sentence they ever say.

God its just so fuckin tiring. And thats the point. Its playing dumb to make you too tired to fight back, so you just shut up and let people treat you like shit. My abusive father used to do the same thing, pretending like he ~just didnt know~ that what he was doing was abuse and you had to explain it to him. Over and over in exactly the same way every time. Its clear he never really was "just innocent of why you were upset", he was only faking it to find a way to keep doing it while also getting everybody's sympathy as if he was the one being wronged...

God man im just so fuckin tired. I hope this LONG AND VERY WELL EXPLAINED POST can be the last time i have to say this damn thing again, but i doubt it...

[anyhao-archived]

okay im finally getting around to posting this, tbh i had to take a few days to (rest) before i thought more about this lol. also sorry it’s so long, ill put it under a read more. ANYWAYS my vav experience, as follows:

so for the fan sign there was a Lot going on so i forgot most of it but.. barons teeth sparkled when he smiled lmao anyways st van was first and I told him he was my moms favorite and he went rly?? in a really cute voice and he just seemed so surprised, it was endearing

and then jacob... i don’t mess with him anymore. jk lol he was so freaking attractive but like in a Hot way? his smile was so nice that im pretty sure i garbled my words but i tried to tell him i really like love night.. and I was going to ayno and like idk if i was joking to myself or what but just loud enough i actually said, oh that’s lots of bling! and both ayno and jacob heard me, ayno laughed genuinely and jacob was like omg i can’t believe this idiot.. i don’t think i said anything to ayno, he seemed really uncomfortable so i didn’t want to bother him anymore. but his laugh was genuine i could tell, and for a split second i don’t think he was wearing his Idol Mask(TM) when he smiled. but that’s probably just wishful thinking lol

ACE I CANT BELIEVE HIM he looked so fucking good oh my god i got to him and i called him a Casanova and he went ayyyy with a thumbs up and finger guns and i wanted to die lmfao

when i got to baron he said my name but kinda pronounced it wrong but i corrected him, and he said it again. and then i told him my name rhymes with his and he said mine like four times in different ways trying it out and rhyming it with his stage name😭 HE DIDNT have to say my name that many times, god. his English was so fucking good holy shit and his pronounciation??? Amazing and he’s so handsome up close, like literal Disney prince handsome

ziu talks sooo much!!! I love it and he’s so good looking and kind and he shook my hand and ??? he said to enjoy the show and i told him to enjoy doing the show and he did like a shy smile kind of thing !! you could tell he was trying hard with the English i was rly proud of him

lou had a flower crown on and i complimented on it and he said my name so well and there was more with him but i forgot 😢

but that was just the fan sign lol so much other stuff happened... later during the show i nearly died bc of ayno.. they were picking people to go up on stage, right? and there was a girl in front of me also with her hand raised, like freaking out (maybe a bit too much?) and i was like okay she probably wants it so i kinda like.. stopped raising my hand and gestures to her? If that makes sense... he almost picked her but when he saw me be nice and let her have it, he literally stares at me and picks me, dead on...but someone random that he wasn’t pointing at like ROWS back walked on stage before we could realize it was me but that fucking eye contact i had with him made him SHOOT up my bias list lol now I have to rethink my entire order. im like 75% sure that he picked me because i wasn’t a crazy fan, like the girl in front of me was a bit much.. and obviously if i was willing to give it up im not that insane... ladies, it pays off to be a nice person!

AND JACOB WITH THE BABY please end me i fell for him so much like he’s almost overtaking baron that’s how much i liked him last night and how nice is vav that they tried to pick new people?? like they picked the fan boy, the little baby, the elderly lady.. and they even helped her to and from the stage 💗😍 AND SPEAKING of gentlemanly stuff there was a guy with a wheelchair during the snapshots in line for jacob and when they were done he personally pushed the guy in the wheelchair all the way to where the man needed to go. he breaks my heart and heals it simultaneously, he’s so underrated but still a genuinely and QUIET nice person.. he doesn’t do good stuff to be noticed. like when winter breeze was over, they had the rappers sing it too... but not jacob. i was so upset and he also didn’t do his solo song that i specifically told him i liked, but ayno did two of his. im not bitter at all what do u mean ??? 🤷‍♀️

i feel like more happened at the concert but i can’t think of much more, im sure other fan accounts will have it all. the only thing i can think about is the snapshots anyways lol

the group picture was ... interesting. the hi touch wasnt much except it reinforced my idea that ayno recognized me, bc instead of a high five he held my hand for as long as possible, probably an apology for earlier. i nearly died. the pic ended up looking awful but thats okay lol. then we tried to leave but i ended up going the wrong way, and a staff handed me roughly like actually grabbing my shoulders and pushing me in the right direction (which i did not appreciate, please chill, u just didnt tell us the right way to go...) and a few members saw that and didnt like either. ayno looked irritated but im sure  hes just irritated at everything at that point lol, lou and ace looked at me sympathetically, and i gave ace the happy bday present someone asked me to give to him. he was so surprised it was adorable.

OKAY, NOW FOR THE SNAPSHOTS: so i actually had 7 snapshots but ended up getting 2 with jacob and 2 with ayno instead of one with everyone (which.. if u look above is not a surprise lmfao) so the first snapshot i do is with baron, obviously.. and this ASSHOLE wants to kill me like... for everyone i tried to pick poses that werent too touchy bc a) im not comfortable w that and b) im sure they were all tired of being touched lol so i picked the one where you make fingerhearts while standing next to each other, but NOOOOO

baron decides he doesnt like that pose enough so he literally puts his hands on my shoulders, guides me to a position thats not only in FRONT of him but CLOSER TO HIM than i was originally!!! what the fuck!! thats not all after that he had to lean around me and basically like... he was so fucking close to me oh my god. he smelled so good i need to know where he gets his cologne. also lol when he moved me in front of him i was like... omg are u sure??? im kinda tall.. and he just laughs and smiles and leans into/around me. that picture of me looks so stupid bc i was so.. happy and Not Ready lmao

anyways i go to jacob next and do the e-t touch pose lol since like i said... didnt want touchy ones and he seemed amused that i picked that one. i wonder if it was one of the least popular ones? probably.. and GOD hes rly such a gentleman hottie like i rarely say h*t but.... jacob was hot. since we did the e.t touch pose we had to touch fingertips and (eyes emoji) not to have a hand kink or anything but hes got. really nice hands. long fingers. also lmfao he had long ass fingernails and i kinda joked with him like “youve got longer fingernails than i do!!” and he laughed and smiled at me. and okay i turn to leave like gotta have the next person go but APPARENTLY he wasnt ready for the next person yet...  i literally had to have the staff be like wait! jacob is saying bye to you!!! and i was like WHAT and turned around and ran back to him basically to say bye he was grinning the entire time and he waved his hand and held it up for (i thought) a high five but he grabbed it and i swear i fell for him right there. JACOB WHEN WILL U BE MINE godfjkdgd and i watched him for a little bit but he didnt say bye that enthusiatically to anyone else (that i saw, at least)

then i did the prom pose with st. van, it was adorable. you could tell he was rly trying to interact with everyone and idk what it is about him but i felt comfortable enough to actually do a Touchy pose (the holding arm pose, like prom yknow). we love an amazing leader~

oH i did one with ziu too!! i did the byung byung pose with the hands together and we both looked ridiculous lol. i dont remember much about him except he was so tall wtf taller than i expected.

at this time i keep looking at my pics and THE E.T PIC WITH JACOB??? makes me crack the hell up.... it had to have been fate, obviously. in the pic (from the camera flash, i guess) where our fingers were touching, it just SO HAPPENED THAT THERE WAS A FLASH OF LIGHT......... iconic. jacob n i are meant to be. so i get in line for him again bc i want to show him the pic, but by the time i got up there again i had forgotten. i was also like... ready for a touchy pose with him bc why not. i cant remember what pose i did with him or if anything happened, im sure i was in a trance then lmao. pretty sure he recognized me but i cant be sure. 

then i get in line for ayno and i have two snapshot tickets left, and the staff announces theres only a few mins left so i was like SHIT and figured id just do two with ayno bc i didnt wanna waste any. his line was so long and staff had to keep reminding ppl not to hug/touch him and i felt soooo bad. i picked poses that werent too close to him, and even those in the pic he looked like he was trying to not be close to me lol. i feel so bad for him, im sure he got a lot of weird fans that night. i think he recognized me (again) because he smiled genuinely like he was happy i was there. i think he appreciated that i picked poses that didnt require touching -- he probably had a Lott of that. when the second pic was being printed the staff member laughed at something someone said, but i thought she was laughing at my picture bc i take shit pics and i got offended for a second and so did ayno LMAO but then she explained and i said bye to him and he went back into Idol Mask(TM) and i think that was it. 

i also ate at ihop that night, it was great, we didnt get back to our hotel till after 2am, it felt so... young adult-ish to be out so late lmao. i was very proud at how everything turned out, i dont think i wouldve changed a thing

anyway, long story short: im in love with jacob, baron is a disney prince, ayno shot up my bias list (he was like... last lmao) and i appreciate him as a person. those three were the Big Three, but i still loved meeting the other members. 10/10 would recommend vav

[melodromacy]

mag: really gotta say: i hate existing as a fictive. i really, really hate existing as a fictive. because now i have to basically compartmentalize all the trauma of this god damn fandom into its own little box so that our host can fucking function on a day to day basis. and there's like, what, 8 of us - fictives from this source - that are responsible for doing this same exact fucking thing. 8 of us. me, seth, everyone else - we're all responsible for compartmentalizing parts of this fucking trauma and putting it into boxes so our fucking host can function on a day to day basis. we're responsible for blocking all the m*tal*calyp*e blogs so that our host doesnt choke up when he sees them. we're responsible for scrubbing the dashboard of anything related to it because it's so physically and mentally fucking painful for him to see it anymore.

do you realize how fucking tired i am? to exist? i dont want to, anymore. but i know how badly it would hurt our partner if i stopped existing. if i went dormant forever. but i dont want to exist anymore. i dont want to keep bringing this fucking trauma onto our host by fucking existing. thats my problem. me existing is the fucking problem. because yknow im drawn to be BROWN and have GOLD CHAINS HANGING FROM MY FACE like XERXES from 300, or whatever because yknow its fine if rachel bolan from skid row has a nose chain but if i have a nose chain suddenly im a weird racist depiction of an old persian king, which is admittedly a really, really strange comparison. im tired of fucking existing. i dont want to. im so tired.

im tired of remembering what people said about me. im tired. im so tired. please let me out. i dont wanna be here anymore. please. im fucking begging you. i dont even know who im talking to. its been years and it still affects me. it still affects baxter. he wont even fucking touch me because of the fic he stumbled across several years ago. he rarely speaks now. he didnt speak for nearly two weeks after finding that fic. and he still wont touch me. it affects seth. he doesnt want me talking about it, but fucks sake, it affects me! it affects mel, charles, sammy, tony - all of us, and we're all so god damn tired.

it affects the people who arent even from my source. jori is so upset having to see me upset, and i can't help it. i've got such a burden on my back. it fucking weighs on me. knowing ive got eyes on me. and i know this will get made fun of too. we still get anons, sometimes. we're afraid to like new things because it seems like it still follows us. even **** is afraid to interact with his own fandom because of the same kind of fears i have. and kevin, stopcock. and pink. and albert. and pete, and tropy, everybody. they're afraid to reach out to their own fandoms, because they're afraid of the fire. im so tired, and even in the residence, i feel so fucking lonely. so, so fucking lonely. im lonely on here. im lonely in there. even when im talking to other people outside of the system i'm so fucking lonely. im so tired.

[boiling-paint]

Midnight vent:

Y'know what? I have really sensitive friends. They get overwhelmed, give up and complain, etc. I accidentally hurt them because I feel so calm about horrible situations that my advice can come off as if I am misunderstanding their situation. But to be perfectly honest, my vocabulary isnt good enough to give more then 'bummer, uh... maybe try (insert mildly helpful task)?' I get it, and I want to help, but I never feel like they do.

I dont know how to help people that have come so close to convincing themself of being helpless. They make so many plans, and get bummed when they're ruined. They get mad when situations theyve worked hard to get to dont work out. They get frustrated and upset when they fail.

And I dont know how to help, because to be honest? I'm jealous. I am jealous as all hell, because I can make plans and set goals for myself and follow them, but when they crumble I'm not upset. I dont get upset cause hey, I can make another goal with a better plan. But I want to get upset sometimes. I should get upset because hey! I didnt do the thing and that's really not good for me!

I dont know what to do to make it better, either.

My friend just got mad because they played video games all day and feel like they wasted their time. I dont know what to do some days, and so I play games all day. It's not so bad, but I didnt go make other plans in the first place. I never meant to go make plans.

I dont get reactive when something doesnt go my way. I dont get upset when something crashes down on me, and while that helps sometimes, I kind of hate it.

I want to be able to react. To help. To feel like I should go do something and try. The only thing I've ever been motivated in is physical exercise-- but not so far as to play a sport. I want to get upset over things and fuck up and hate that I fucked up because I am absolutely tired of shrugging shit off. But I never get like that, I just dont. I just stand back up and do shit again. I'm lucky enough to be able to do things right by practicing form once or twice and listening carefully.

I dont know why I dont just lie in the dirt and get upset for a minute. I dont know why I dont ever try to make plans for myself in the outside world.

Maybe it's because I cant travel just yet, or because Im not eager to hang out with people, but its worrying. I run out of motivation so quickly unless its something I've thought about and planned out. And I rarely have the motivation to plan anything out in the first place.

I just want to be able to react and help my friends, yknow? But how can I do that when they fall over and get dirt kicked in their face, and all I can do is stand there and offer a hand? Because alot of the time it seems like they need someone in the dirt there with them, not someone staring at them and telling them to get up. Not someone that doesnt even offer a hand and walks away. They need someone on their level, and I want to be on that level sometimes for them, to reassure them that I'm there too and we can both get through this, but how can I do that when I dont get as upset and overwhelmed as they do? When I'm never on that level of 'oh my God im so upset im a failure what do I do'?

My advice isnt all that helpful when all I can do is repeat it over and over and hope someone is listening.

[theworldsoul]

notes for the doctors at 3pm dec 1

sorry for putting such personal info on my tumblr, but i currently am having technical difficulties and have nowhere else 2 put this. 

ANYWAYS 

how the meds make me feel: 

10MG: TO BE COMPLETELY HONEST i didnt manage to sober up until enough time had passed that i had just switched my dosage from 10MG to 20MG, so i really cant speak for how 10MG made me feel. I WAS HIGH THE ENTIRE TIME SO IDK. theres no nice way to say this, but i just really love tripping absolute balls,,, but its not SUSTAINABLE. yknow? my grades tanked big time. I only managed sobriety when it was forced upon me and NOW, as much as i want to get high, i know it isnt sustainable. it hurts others and im tired of feeling like IM the problem. not like my brain, but ME. and i wanna be a man and im currently clean because i WANT TO BE,  but also because being forced off it opened my eyes;... and shut them all at once. My dad says i was “more jubilant” when i was on 10MG. OF COURSE I WAS MORE JUBILANT, I WAS BLASTED OUT OF MY MIND ON FUCKING!!!!!!!! DRUGS!!!!!!

ok next order of bizness: HOW THE MEDS MAKE ME FEEL: PART TWO SHARKNADO MOTHERFUCKERS!!! the motherfucking SEQUELLLLLLLL 

sorry im writing weird im kinda riding this weird high rn i almost feel weed-happy. but im not on weed. LOL its cos of my friends and dad like PEOPLE LIKE ME and i do art art and music makes me happyyyy

ok BUSINESS. 

20MG: nothing feels different. the only differences noted are as follows:

* reality struggles. i understand things are real but there is an emotional dissonance, a FOG. also i dont totally believe in objective reality lol. every news headline i read feels like it should be in the onion... not real life. examples covid vaxes and variants, astroworld, tim hortons justin bieber collab, living robots that can reproduce??? russia invading ukraine. MOSTLY COVID SHIT THO. IT FEELS SO ARTIFICAL AND FORCED INTO EXISTENCE AND I REALLY THINK THERES AN EVIL MOTIVE BEHIND IT. just saw a dog on the tl and i swear it looked fake.  but its my friends dog... this hurts a lot and i want to get rid of it, but also im afraid to get rid of it becos well, LOOK AT THE SITUATION IM IN!!! look at all the DAMAGE!! im afraid that if it feels FULLY real, ill never be able to cope. its too sad. im a living tragedy.

* i feel like im annoying and i put too much stress on everyone. maybe thats not the meds tho maybe i AM just seeing truth

*i havent self harmed in a while or really felt much need to except a few times i felt it but didnt do much (no scarring) (like biting my hand or banging my head on the wall) however this doesnt happen often enough to be of concern.

*i dont feel bad REALLY... the reality struggles make me feel OFF and down often to the point that happiness, true happiness is a LUXURY,,, but i dont feel that bad either. like i used to get level 10 sad EVERY FUCKING DAY and now i only get there when triggered by an event or i have to pass a BLOCK to get there

*BLOCKS! a block is like a state in between sadness and normalness. it feels numb and no matter what you do, it is extremely irritating to stay on the block for too long/ I WILL ATTACH AN ILLUSTRATION EXPLAINING BLOCKS

*triggered by an event: events still upset me disproportionately. for example, i took pics of my chem test RESULTS to take home and study which is uhh not allowed but i wasnt sneaky enough so the teacher noticed and she was all IAN WHAT R U DOING and i... i get like this every time an adult is mad with me. even a little bit, even if theyre right. she had to check my phone annd she aint mean shes nice but i just,,, lost all desire to be looking at my test and shit and i just put it back barely even looking at it and ran out the door down the hall and locked myself in the bathroom and sank down to my butt and sat there with my head in my knees and cried pathetically about how i didnt belong there and im an artist not a fucking chemist (the test said 50 percent lol) and i slammed my head hard against the wall twice or three times then i cried some more eventually i felt i had been in there too long so i just said benedicts prayer until i felt okay enough to face the world again then i left to class like if nothing had happened. I stress this reaction was INAPROPRIATTE. i panicked so hard over nothing. im a child 

*ex 2 grinch hat and stuffed animal leo the bear 

*i feel SUPER SAD as i type this rn but its in and out cos sometimes as soon as i begin to accept and acknowlegde my sadness it gets a block. blocks are sometimes helpful so i can keep composure but sometimes frustrating because once you crack the block too much you have no choice but to push through completely or feel unsatisfied

*i feel like i would be so much happier on weed but IM NOT ALLOWED WEED plus it tanks my chem grade

*i often find myself with nobody to talk to,,, no friends to chat with. i have many friends but i dont see them much, aand i often feel as though my newer friends do not actually like me. maybe they think im annoying and childish. my chem lab partner asked me if it was chill if she worked with this smart girl Violet. i said yeah sure and acted unbothered, and i was proud of myself for finishing the titration alone, but it sorta hurt my feelings. she always acts so cool and above all and she goes “mhmm” when i try to make her laugh and it makes me feel stupid and annoying/... and sol is always hanging with these other kids that arent my wavelength at ALL,,, and today i waited for him and one of the other kids to  pack their shit at the end of the first class cos usually we leave class together and talk in the hallways as we walk to our next classes... but to my surprise he stared at me like i wwas being weird and said “sooo ill be seeing u later?” which is just code for “why r u still here” and i said sorry hahah yeah see u tommorow :) and acted unbothered but actually when i left i saw him walking with the other kid and it felt like... idk. NOBODY VIBES WITH ME. NOBODY WANTS TO BE MY FUCKING FRIEND. all my juniour high friends are my friends and thats all i have.... all my friends can easily leave me and talk to someone less annoying but i dont have that luxury, and it breaks my heart really that my new highschoolfriends would rather hang out with anyone other than me. i wish that other kid wasnt there because he always takes all of sols attention and doesnt leave any for me, and that SOUNDS really bad but the truth is I thrive when paid attention to. i dont like to go too long without talking to people cos it makes me feel invisible. 

im miserable. please help me. ive let God down and ive let my parents down. im a failure. im the worst and i dont belong here.

up the dosage or some shit please, it hurts so bad. im sad level 10 rn... in a lot of pain. and my head hurts from bashing it against the wall.

[gayspock]

dont rb, dont reply

y ou know for once i wish i was fucking good enough to at least. do one fuck ing thing. i wish i could do one FUCKING thing right but go d no. i dont fucking. care i just. okay i do care and i jsut dont want to admit how fucking disgutingly fucking pathetic and d esperate i am. but god  i sjut. m .  hhhhhhhhhhhhhUIAUHSDAD. zdvpjpsdgjpsg

like im just. fuc k man. kinda jsut lying down and thinking about hwo fucking worthless i am and h ow. you know when youre just. upset and alone and. slike. uhhhghffhsd. UGUYHFH0SDUHSD. slike why am i so so fucking stupid and. why do i Keep fucking. i dont know im s o fucking. pathetic and i jsut love how much i fucking screw everything up and fucking ruin everyhting and then cry when no one can fucking stand my fucking guts and end up alone and ufcking miserable with nothing to fucking live for. like thats so choic e huh. i love having  0 fucking reason to stay alive othe rthan the hopless fucking pathetic realisation that m an it wouldnt even ma ttr if i died nothing canf ucking fix the fac tyoure an insignificant and worthless Wreck so whats that gonna matter huh.  do you ever just. ffffffffffffffffffffffffffffsdpfjsdf. 

m tired of people too just. i dont know, again, why im so deluded half the fucking time and thin k im friends with peopl when  cl early . nyehadhnd. god. i  just. i kno w its so so fucking selfish and it happe ns but i jsut. Horriblfucking jealousy time i guess. getting upset because im only ever the stupit boy peop le come to when no one else is around and slike. i dont actually ma tter unless its desper ate and m never like a Best friend or even a friend half the time its kind a. fucking bovious and yknow when yoyre just watching everyone and youre s o so fucking distant and alone and. theres never anyone clo se and thats highkey your fault but whatver you try its just worse and you jsut feel more stupid and fucking pathetic for ever thinking youre gonna. fucking be of enough worth to fucking get anywher e furhtr than the stupid fucking useless hole yorue stuc k in .  and it doesntg mattr man. because i dont matter at all and it doesnt mattr that its upsetting and . id ont know. i whine about all of this too much and my fucking face is starting to feel dead and im cryin g agian and i  was really fucking upset earlier i know i was bbut whats it matter man whats any of it fucking matter and the . oh i should KILL myself thing wont fuckin ever go away huh . hum. huhhhh . jesus its so stupi d i. you know when you jsut wanna break something so at least you break out of a loop even if you fall into a diffwrent and worse one. like just fucking. go d.

[groundramon]

Bnha (like who do you legit dislike will all of your being?)

So the obvious answer is, well, obvious - Mineta, of course.  I dont trust anyone whose least favorite BNHA character isn’t Mineta //sHOT  Mineta is a boring answer so im gonna talk about my second least favorite character, but I wanna talk about Mineta for a second because I do have a lot to say about him.

The problem with Mineta isn’t really Mineta; it’s that he’s indistinguishable from every other child-like annoying pervert character out there.  I dont watch a whole lot of anime and what I have watched was either 1. recommended to me by someone who I know hates this kind of shit too, or 2. was written/dubbed for kids.  Having said that, I already know he’s indistinguishable from other perverts because I cant even distinguish him from the one other child-like pervert I’ve had the misfortune of coming across in an anime.  He’s a tired trope and nothing more; it’s just unfortunate that he had to be such an uncomfortable trope to begin with.  In a way he’s fundamentally broken, but it’s less that he’s broken and more that he’s uninspired.

Like, Hagakure is arguably in the same “role” as Mineta (and I know that seems like an insult but bear with me its not I sWEAR, I LOVE HER) because they’re both entirely comedy reliefs.  Hagakure may have a serious moment later in the manga, I wouldn’t know.  But Hagakure is a well-rounded character that doesn’t fall into a clear trope (albeit her jokes are somewhat predictable since, yknow, invisibility isnt an uncommon super power) and has a multi-faceted personality.  As a fairly minor character, she’s more than developed enough for her role, however if they made her more central to the story she would have to get more development.  But she’s quirky, she’s shy, she can be feisty when she wants to be, and she has known relationships with other characters.  We know which characters are her friends and which she doesnt interact with much.  And because there’s so much to her, she’s 100000x better than Mineta on a fundamental (ie not factoring how much better she is because mineta is a pervert and i love hagakure) level because she’s a comic relief who isn’t just a tired trope.

The other part of Mineta is that the thing about pervert characters is that the “humor” in them kind of follows the same rules as grossout humor, from my understanding.  Unfortunately I’m not a fan of either so even if he did this right I wouldnt like him.  With gross-out humor, the goal is not to gross out your audience.  The goal is to gross out your characters and have your audience laugh at their misery.  Kinda like how slapstick is supposed to be funny; you enjoy watching characters get hurt, but you dont want to be hit with a frying pan yourself.  In mineta’s defense, he actually….kind of does this well.  I cant believe I’m about to defend mineta, but fuck.  A lot of the humor in his jokes tends to come from punishment coming to him for his advances and punishment just coming to him in general.  You’re supposed to laugh AT him, not with him.  His advances are the setup to the joke, and Tsuyu or Jirou killing him or him having to clean up a house when he went on a heroing internship with a beautiful woman instead of actually hanging out with said woman are the punchlines.  This isn’t the case in all of his jokes though, just the majority of them.  And that doesn’t override the initial uncomfortable-ness of pervert characters.  Like I dont like seeing characters throw up because something is gross, that just makes me uncomfortable.  Even if I dont see the vomit it’s still not comfortable.  Neither type of joke is my style of humor and I cant imagine that ever changing. (slapstick is tho, love me some slapstick)

BUT because Mineta is an obvious, boring answer, I’ll give you my second answer too - which is Bakugo.

I dont have some big wild tangent to go off on on the fundamental badness of Bakugo, because Bakugo is actually a really well-crafted character.  Probably not BNHA’s best since BNHA has so many good characters, but Bakugo is above most shows’ and stories’ characters by a sizable margin.  He’s well crafted to be a dick with a motivation/inspiration that also isn’t sympathized with by the narrative.  The narrative isn’t like “aww poor Bakugo” even though he has a reason for why he acts the way he does, it’s like “haha fuck Bakugo” and I really appreciate that.  His bad behavior is properly punished.

But as much as I respect him and his treatment on a fundamental level, HE MAKES ME ANGRY.  I’ve never been a fan of angry anime characters, ever.  They almost always piss me off and the only ones I can sort of tolerate are emos with tempers.  If a character’s first reaction to something is “punch it/blow it up/whatever” I’m going to dislike them on a personal level.  I dont know why, but I just cant stand angry characters.  I guess I’m just such an opposite to them that they make me mad.  They’re the kind of people I would loathe meeting in real life, because I HATE yelling and loud people and angry people and UGH.  Like calm down, eat some bread, and just fucking talk about your issues jfc.  I’m the kind of person who, well first of all I rarely get angry, but when I do get seriously angry, I either go completely quiet or I talk very seriously.  As in, story-level serious writing, no jokes, no emojis or internet talk, none of that.  If I’m only a little upset or angry I might try to diffuse a conversation by calmly calling someone out and saying “its okay!” or just completely ignoring it and being friendly anyways, but my point is that I dont yell.  I have no idea how people can write in caps and be seriously angry like…dont you feel ridiculous.  And yelling irl hurts my throat and my ears so

But obviously I hate Mineta way more than Bakugo on every single level.  Bakugo might arguably make me angrier but also I underestimate how angry Mineta makes me unless he says something right in front of me so

thanks for the ask!!!