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newkiqx · 10 months ago
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Oh my god Heart is confirmed too?
the hype is real
ok i'm making a music post
So Graspop is a metal festival on paper, which is not usually my go to, but there's also a bunch of rock and some other genres. First confirmed name was tool, which i have been a sucker for since I was 17 when they completely blew me away with their live performance
my watch list so far includes:
Alice cooper Avenged Sevenfold Babymetal Body Count (Ice-T's metal band! it fucking slaps) (heres another one) (gotta include this one too sorry) Bruce Dickinson Deep Purple Electric Callboy (if you don't know them please watch these videos. They're hilarious and their upbeat power/europop x metal mixture shouldn't be this catchy, fun and genuinely good, but it is) Heart Iron Allies Judas Priest Limp Bizkit Megadeth Pendulum Scorpions Tool
and more!
it's been so long since i've been to an absolutely stacked festival. Can't wait
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parfaitblogs · 4 months ago
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daylight ❀ s. reid x reader
in which communicating with your boyfriend is scary, and spencer reid can't stand to see you cry.
pairing: spencer reid x fem!reader genre: comfort/fluff! tags: reader avoids her issues... for a little bit. that's kind of it. it's just fluffy and simple! word count: 1.5k a/n: something short & sweet because i thought it was cute and i write the most when i'm procrastinating assignments... um
 inspired by a conversation sam willow and i were having a few nights agođŸ«‚Â reminder that pretty girls cry when they’re confronting somebody!!
Spencer Reid was not oblivious to all things in the world. In fact, he was rather perceptive compared to most people. Psychology degree and human behaviour-based job aside, he noticed things. 
A lot of it was good. He knew exactly how to wake you up on mornings he started earlier than you. How to keep you half-asleep enough to allow you your return to sleep, but also awake enough to ensure you'd remember him kissing you goodbye (there had been an argument a few months ago about it — you thought he had left without a word). He knew your go-to Thai order from the restaurant down the street, and he knew which pair of wooden chopsticks your favourite were to pull out of his kitchen drawers. 
He was also observant enough to know something was wrong. 
He was back from a case. A long one, that had worn him down enough that he felt like a pile of creaking bones when he re-entered his apartment earlier that afternoon. You had returned from your own job an hour after that, and despite the initial excitement that came from your boyfriend being back in the state again, you were a bundle of nerves. 
And he knew that.
You were on his couch, legs across his lap and back up against the arm, his hands resting comfortable in the dip between your two knees. There was a quiet episode of New Girl playing on the television (you had convinced him to watch it after he had sat you through every Star Trek movie), but your thoughts were anywhere but the sitcom you had been using to entertain yourself as of recent. 
"You've been awfully quiet," Spencer said, piercing the less than comfortable air settled around you two. 
"Sorry," you answered, tearing your gaze from the screen to look at him, meeting a worried expression you had somewhat expected. 
Hands ran up and down your legs, erupting goosebumps along the skin. "Is something wrong?" 
"No," you immediately shook your head and forced a smile onto your face. "Nothing's wrong."
He furrowed his eyebrows, lips parting in that confused look he always had on his face when he was thinking, and he stared at you for a few seconds longer, before, "Yes there is."
Profilers. "Seriously, Spence. There isn't. I'm just kind of tired tonight."
"I am as well," he said, hands stilling on your legs rather abruptly. "I was in Idaho for a week. I'm also exhausted. And usually my girlfriend is a little touchier and more talkative than this when I come home. So I'm assuming something's wrong."
"You're assuming incorrectly, then," your shoulders shrugged.
He said your name chidingly, and it was at that tone of voice that you retracted your legs from his lap, instead tucking your feet beneath yourself, gaze dropping to the couch cushion. 
"I just missed you," you told him, a slight stretch of the truth. 
"I missed you too," he said, and your shoulders softened. "But that's not all it is."
You blinked, before you fell silent, shaking your head instead. 
"Talk to me. What's happened?" his voice was achingly soft, your heart shattering in your chest to the point you wanted to take back every thought you'd had over the past week and burn them to ashes. They didn't mean much now in front of him. Not when he was reminding you of how kind he was. 
"You barely talked to me," you said, hands dropping to your lap, and you fidgeted with them under his gaze. "I never knew what was going on. You didn't call once, except for when you landed."
"I was really busy, honey," he answered, and you could hear the frown in his voice. "If I had time to do anything other than the case and sleep, you know I'd have talked to you more." 
"I know," your voice shook, and you could feel your emotions overriding your brain. As usual. So, you kept your head down. "But I would've liked you to tell me that, at least."
You heard him sigh, and curiosity got the best of you as you lifted your gaze, inspecting to see if he was sighing out of irritation or not. He wasn't — just exhaustion — and that made you feel a little better.
"I know for next time then," he said, and he met your eyes, which had watered since the last time he looked at you. Which wasn't very long ago, and so he was drawing his eyebrows together, again, confusedly. "What's that? What's wrong?"
On instinct he leaned forwards, and you let him shift his body closer to yours, hands coming up on either side of your neck. You sniffled, trying to suck the tears threatening to fall back into your eye sockets. 
"I can't communicate," you mumbled, quietly, a tear escaping and dripping down to the lower half of your cheek. 
"You communicated pretty well just then, angel," he said, voice soft as he caught the remainder of the tear and swiped it away with his thumb. 
"Yeah but—but now I'm crying," you moaned, pathetically, more tears slipping down your face. His lips twitched — though not in humour, you noted — as he adjusted his hands to your jaw, thumbs continuing to wipe falling tears. 
"Yeah. That's okay," he answered. "You've got a flood of hormones going through you right now, and so your body reacts to it in the best way it sees fit. In your case, it's tears."
"I hate it," you mumbled, and this time he did laugh a little, nodding his head. 
"I know," he said. "Are you feeling embarrassed about communicating with me?"
"I guess," you replied. "I don't know. I think I just..." you trailed off as your voice disappeared, breath beginning to hyperventilate acutely. "I—I just feel kind of sil—silly."
You cursed each sob that broke up your speech, and yet his gaze and focus on you never once wavered. In fact, his touch seemingly had grown softer, and the concern in his eyes had only grown. 
"You aren't silly," he said, once he was sure you weren't going to continue speaking. "If me not talking to you for a week upset you, I'd say that's pretty reasonable."
"I don't know..."
"Want a secret?" he asked, fingers poking into your cheeks enough for you to crack a small smile. You only nodded your head in response, chest still jolting with each sharp intake of breath. "I have to physically restrain myself from calling you every hour on a normal day."
"You're lying," you mumbled, and his smile only widened, a bashful laugh leaving his lips. 
"No, honestly. I have so much I want to talk to you about during the day, and I need to remind myself that you're busy and at work too."
A few uncontrollable tears dripped down your face, and your gaze dropped to the top of his shirt, though the smile never left your face. "I don't believe you."
"I wish you would, but that's okay," he said, evidently seeing right through your defying statement — you believed him a little.
His forefinger and thumb caught your chin, and he tilted your head back up so his eyes could meet your glassy ones. 
"I'm sorry," you murmured, before he could get a word in.
"For what?"
"Crying."
"Do you take in anything I say to you?" he chastised, though the smile on his face eliminated any fear of him being genuinely irritated, and so your shoulders simply shrugged. 
"Sometimes," you said, and his eyebrows shot up. 
"Sometimes?" he repeated back to you, and you had to bite your lip to keep the amused expression off your face. He was smiling back at you, before his face settled into something more serious, as he continued, "I don't mind you crying, angel. It breaks my heart to see it, but I'm not sitting here and judging you for it. You know that, right?"
"Yeah."
"Good," he finalised with a short nod, and you sniffled with a nod of your own. 
"I mean, technically, crying is good," you said, tongue poking between your teeth as you forced back a smile. 
"Yeah? Why's that?" 
"Releases endorphins and oxytocin."
He huffed a single laugh through his nose, nodding his head. "Yes. It does."
"I know things," you grinned. 
"You do," he agreed with a nod. "My smart girl."
"Yeah. Don't ever forget it."
"I could never," he replied, and a comfortable silence enveloped your two bodies, your heart fluttering in your chest. 
"Can you tell me about Idaho?" you finally asked him.
"You really want to know?" 
You nodded your head, and he sighed, but complied regardless. And you eventually found your head in his lap, staring up at him as one hand danced gently over the skin of your slightly exposed stomach, the other entangled in your hair, brushing through it. 
And he told you about the case he had been away on — it became glaringly obvious behind why he hadn't called or messaged you at all — and consequently eased any other remaining worries behind it.
And it dried your tears up.
your reblogs and replies are always appreciated ♡
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take-it-on-the-run · 6 months ago
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Not A Lot, Just Forever
Dean Winchester x Pregnant!Reader
After throwing up morning after morning, the reader discovers her illness isn't what she initially thought.
Word Count: 4.1k
Tags: Pregnancy, unexpected pregnancy, brief description of motel bathrooms, vomiting (repeated), self-blame, mention of reader's mother dying in childbirth, mention of childbirth related deaths, anxiety, brief loss of consciousness, Dean is a sweetheart and will make a great father.
Characters: Dean Winchester, Pregnant!Reader, Sam Winchester, Castiel
@ghostlyaccurate requested: "Hii! I'm not sure if I already sent you this request, or if I sent it to someone else (oopsđŸ€­) but could I request a Sam Winchester and/or Dean Winchester x reader (your choice which one of them, if not both sepperately) where he helps reader deal with morning sickness, though he only finds out she's pregnant on the third day in a row that he's with her while she throws up. Ty!!"
Read it on AO3!
A/N: Adrianne Lenker title. I really really loved this request! I feel like writing the pregnancy trope is a sort of hard task to do, so I hope I brought it justice. I love love loved writing this, and I hope you enjoy reading it! Thank you for the request @ghostlyaccurate, and I promise I'm trying my damnedest to work through my inbox <3. Every mistake here is completely and 100% my own and of my own doing. (P.S. can you guess how hard it was to find "aesthetic" pictures of a bathroom and pregnancy tests for the pictures for this fic?? I think the ones I found actually work pretty well! Another thing, what happened to the yellow text color? I use it to tag fluff fics, and it's gone :( ).
Dean Winchester Masterlist | Supernatural Masterlist | Main Page Masterlist
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Your head hung over the foul toilet bowl of whatever motel you, Dean, and Sam were holed up in, and a rancid smell invaded your nose. In earnest, you didn’t have the slightest idea where you were. The past couple of hours had been filled with a slight fever and the constant need to use Dean as a pillow. Halfway through the drive between towns, you convinced him to switch out driving with Sam so he could join you in the back seat.
The worn tile of the bathroom floor offered you minimal comfort, and the fact you’re supposed to be up for a case in two hours made your stomach churn over again. Ditching your normal avoidance of motel bathrooms, you gripped the edge of the toilet and emptied your stomach again.
“Y/N?” Dean’s groggy voice called out from behind the door, “Are you okay in there sweetheart?”
You squeezed your eyes together, cursing yourself for being loud enough to wake him up. Sneaking out from his arms was a feat enough already, trying to suppress the sound of you losing your guts at four in the morning wasn’t going to happen; even in a perfect world.
“No,” you groaned as he softly opened the door, “I feel like shit De, and you know how much I hate throwing up. And how much I hate motel bathrooms.” You whined. Your hair was falling to the front of your face and you were cursing whoever decided a bathroom didn’t need a working air vent.
Dean hummed softly, pulling the hair back from your face and holding it with one hand as he sat behind you on the floor. He pressed his lips to the back of your head softly, and gently traced shapes on your collarbone as you laid back on him.
“Just breathe, I’ve got you if you need to go at it again.” He said softly, cradling you in his lap as you tried to breathe. He ran his hand through your hair as your breathing started to hiccup less, and eventually, he sat you on the closed toilet lid to get you water.
You felt ashamed to be keeping him up at this hour. Your phone clock read 5:13 AM, almost an hour past when you’d originally gotten up. He already doesn’t get enough sleep as is, and here you are sitting, waiting for him to get back like you aren’t able to take care of yourself.
“Here you go, drink slowly. Did you use the mouthwash I gave you?” He asked as he handed you his water bottle. He stood across from you, tucking his hands into the pockets of his pajama pants. You nodded softly, gratefully gulping down the contents of the bottle.
The bags under his eyes were already enough to make you feel guilty. Hunters were used to running on minimal sleep, but with you around, he’d just gotten into the six-hour range. He rubbed his face, inhaling like he normally did when he was trying to make a decision. You didn’t want to go out for the case. You barely wanted to move your body to get back in bed and salvage what little sleep you could before life kicked you back into gear.
“Do you want to stay here while Sam and I talk to the family?” Dean asked as if he could read your mind.
I love you so damn much. You thought, bowing your head with a sigh of relief. You didn’t want to be the one to bring up staying in; neither of you ever wanted to admit you needed breaks, but if the other one was to bring it up, it made the process easier.
You nodded, pushing yourself to your feet as he opened the door for the two of you, “yeah, I think that’s best for all of us. Don’t need me puking in the victim’s bathroom as you guys ask your questions.” You tried to joke as you and Dean crawled back into bed, tucking yourself into his arms, and splaying your legs haphazardly on top of his.
The next morning wasn’t any better.
Sam and Dean had come home late from questioning the family, and you were barely aware of them unloading the Chinese food they brought for you. Dean sat with you against his chest, still half-dressed as an FBI agent, as you wolfed down the egg rolls he got. You found yourself starving when they offered you food, but now you regretted eating anything at all.
You found yourself hung over the toilet again, but thankfully only had to put up with one round of saying goodbye to your lunch. You were able to get yourself up and over to the sink, where you repeated Dean’s routine from the morning before.
You leaned against the counter in the small kitchen, Dean’s water bottle filled with tap water in your hand. You turned to dump the rest in the sink when the creak of a floorboard behind you had you spinning on your heel in record time.
“Jesus Christ, Dean. Why are you up?” You asked in a hushed tone, placing your hand over your racing chest.
“I could ask you the same thing,” He crossed the small room and came over to embrace you in his arms, “did you get sick again?” He asked innocently, but the combination of those words, and the pitiful shift of his eyes was enough to make you feel like a child. You were a grown woman, you knew damn well how to take care of yourself much before the Winchesters were in your life.
You huffed in annoyance, pulling back from Dean’s chest. You felt your face begin to heat up, and it felt like anything Dean could say had the chance to send you over the edge.
“Yes, I did. Right now, I feel like my body is too hot and too tight for my bones, and I also feel like anything you say is going to make me hit the roof. Even if it’s nice, I just don’t think my brain can take in any more words without wanting to jump ship.” You said you rubbed your temples. Things like this had happened occasionally in the past, and before Dean, you figured it was just because you were a rigid person. One night a particularly bad migraine had led to you yelling at him because he offered to get you some medicine. Instead of just leaving you to stew, like every other partner did, he simply asked you to explain what you were feeling. No judgment, no interruptions, and he’d do whatever you said would make you feel better in that moment.
Now, whenever you felt overwhelmed, he did the same. He’d swallow any sarcastic comment or solution to your problem and listen to you. No matter what was bothering you, at whatever hour of the day, he was at your side, doing what you asked of him without hesitation.
He just nodded, pressing his lips to your forehead before he led you back to the bed you two were sharing for the case. His body threw off heat like a bonfire, and your normally freezing hands were appreciative of that. In this moment, however, it felt like you were burning from the inside out.
You adjusted yourself between the sheet and the comforter, so the two of you could still touch without pressing your skin together. Dean waited for you to still before he made himself comfy, and he gently ran his fingers through the ends of your hair.
“Is this okay right now? Do you want me to leave you be?” He asked, in as soft of a voice as he could. You hummed, smiling at the tingling sensation running through you. Comfort, and a warmth that wasn’t burning to the touch, crawled up your back, and into your head. You tried to focus your eyes for a couple of seconds more, but without your control, they forcefully fluttered shut.
“Y/N.”
Sheet tangled between your limbs, and you could see the light through your closed eyes. Opening them, you find an unexpected sight. Instead of Dean, or Sam, standing at your bedside, the trench coat-clad angel you’d met five years ago stood awkwardly, waiting for you to fully wake up.
“Cas,” you rubbed your eyes as you sat up, “what are you doing here? Where’s Sam and Dean?” You asked.
Cas sighed and sat at the end of your bed. He shot you a quick look, before focusing his eyes on the blank wall in front of him. He tapped his fingers on his legs, a habit he picked up from Sam.
“Dean called me and told me you were sick. I came in, and told him I’d try and cure whatever
 ailment is afflicting you.”
You smiled at the way he spoke, and the fact Dean went out of his way to try and help you out, but there was something off about Castiel’s demeanor. You sat up and touched his arm to get his attention.
“Cas, what’s wrong? Did something happen that I should know about?” You asked softly.
“I think you’re pregnant, Y/N.” He looked at you, and there was a rift of guilt lingering in his eyes.
A course of confusion and shock coursed through your body before you felt a rotting pit settle at the bottom of your stomach.
“Why would you
 think that, Cas?” You felt a tightness taking over your throat, rubbing your hand across your neck to try and loosen it.
“I can sense life forms. Human ones, at least. It was hard to tell with Sam and Dean here, but once they left I was able to confirm my suspicions.”
Your hand traveled to your lower abdomen before your mouth spat out a request without thinking.
“Pregnancy tests. Can you get me some, please? I just,” you ran your hand across your forehead quickly, “I want to confirm, using non-magical means.”
Cas nodded, “of course. I’m going to assume you don’t want me to let Dean know?”
You nodded your head before swinging your legs over the side of the bed. Deep down, you knew Cas was right. You were late by a few days, but you’d chalked it up to the illness that’s kept you on the bench for this case. You didn’t usually react as poorly as you’ve been to an illness, even when you’d gotten a terrible case of Pneumonia.
Getting up from the bed, you walked into the bathroom as Castiel vanished to get you a couple tests. Looking to the mirror, you’re met with a form of you that was a little scary; purple, slightly-puffy eyes, smeared makeup that hadn’t been washed off from days before, and your skin was breaking out in places it hadn’t before.
Dean hadn’t said a word about it, but even someone as blissfully ignorant as him had to have noticed the way your face wasn’t looking like your own.
Dean.
You’d have to tell Dean you were pregnant, with his child. That you’re going to be parents.
What if he didn’t want to be a father at thirty-six?
Children weren’t one hundred percent out of the question, but they were longer down the line in hunters’ lives. If you were lucky enough to get out of the life unscathed and find someone who would want to settle down with, you’d likely be creeping into your mid-forties, at best. Mary had gotten lucky with John, but now they’d both been taken away by the thing they’d spent half of their marriage avoiding.
What if you weren’t ready to be a mother at thirty-five?
For you, it wasn’t the question of wanting to have kids, but you never saw you or your boyfriend backing out from hunting anytime soon. To add on, you’d heard of many nasty births that ended in fatality for the infant or the mother, including your own. Every time you and the boys were on a case involving a child, you’d be extra reckless. Dean picked this up within the first couple of times you’d almost gotten yourself killed to save a kid, and you explained your fear to him. The fear of a mother not being able to welcome her child home in her arms, or the child not seeing his mother again, and their fate lying in your hands. You’d already ripped apart your family, and you tried your damnedest to keep as many together as possible.
A ruffle of feathers and a sharp knock on the bathroom door snapped you out of your thoughts.
“You can come in, Cas.”
Wordlessly, the angel stepped into the small motel bathroom holding a plastic bag. He pulled out three different pregnancy tests and set them on the counter.
“The woman working there said I should get a couple just in case one doesn’t work like it should.” He said as you picked up the first test. “I’m telling the truth, but I understand you wanting to confirm this to yourself.”
I know Cas, you thought, but you didn’t say a word. Instead, you stared at him, waiting for him to leave the bathroom, but he had a blank look on his face and didn’t move a muscle.
“Cas, I’m going to need you to leave the bathroom for me to do this.”
“Oh, sorry. Of course. I forgot how ‘hands-on’ human tests can be. I apologize.” He said blatantly before stepping out of the bathroom and shutting the door behind him.
Fuck me.
That’s what got you into this in the first place, dumb ass.
After twenty disgustingly long minutes in the decrepit motel bathroom, you walked out holding four positive tests. Cas was sitting on Sam’s bed, staring out the window, but immediately stood up and crossed the room to you. You handed him the tests, and he placed them on the table between the two beds.
“How do you feel?” He asked. Another thing he picked up from his years on earth was the ability to know when to ask what questions.
You felt blank. Void of answers and solutions to the situation at hand. Whether or not to turn left, or right.
“I
 don’t know what to do, Cas.” Your voice broke along with the tears you were holding back, and a sinking feeling of hopelessness began to dig its way through your head.
Neither you nor Dean are ready to be parents. What if Dean’s angry? He would never kick you out of the bunker. The bunker is the only real home any of you have had in a long time, but is it safe? Is the world safe enough to bring a baby into? A Winchester baby, who would no doubt be a target from birth. What if the baby doesn’t make it to full term? What if this baby kills you like you killed your own mother?
“Y/N,” Cas placed his hand on your shoulder, “I’m going to ask you to take a breath.” He drew his hand up and waited for you to inhale. Taking in a shuddered breath, you followed the flow of his hand, stopping your heart from running up your throat.
“Thank you.” You said, sitting down on your bed and grabbing the pregnancy tests off the nightstand. Two pluses, two double lines. You and Dean were careful and used a condom whenever you found extra time together, but somehow God decided that rubber wasn’t going to work as intended.
“I think I’m going to just lay here,” you tuck yourself under the bed sheets once more, the tests shoved into your pajama pants, “and wait for Dean and Sam to get home. I’ll get him out of this stuffy ass room and tell him in private. Sam shouldn’t have to witness if we- if we argue. I know it makes him feel awful.”
“That’s a smart plan. You need to take this one step at a time and do it carefully. I know Dean cares for you deeply, but if you need someone to support you, all you have to do is call for me.” Cas squeezed your shoulder reassuringly.
“Thank you, Cas.” You yawned, pulling your body further under the covers of the bed. Castiel smiled slightly, before turning away and disappearing with a familiar rush of wings flapping.
Your body was covered head to toe in sweat, and the bed sheet you wrapped around yourself was thrown onto the floor. No light entered the room, and the time on the alarm clock read 1:43. Your stomach churned in a familiar way, and as you got to your feet you finally noticed neither of the boys were in the room.
You clambered to the bathroom, phone in hand, trying to call Dean. One hand braced on the toilet, and the other tried to thumb down to his contact. There wasn’t any time to think about the fact you were carrying a baby inside of you, the baby whose father is missing in the middle of the night with no calls or messages.
They always call. You thought before you set your ringing phone on the floor to throw up for the first time that morning. The phone rang, the sound slowly driving you insane each time you redialed Dean’s number between dry heaving into the bowl.
Your hair was sticking to your forehead, poorly swept away and held back by a rubber band you found on the sink. The heat, the pain, and the fear of losing contact with the Winchester brothers combined with the reality of you being pregnant was finally built up enough to break the swarm of emotions you barely choked down when Cas was in the room earlier.
Eyes burning, you slumped against the sink cabinet and brought your phone to your ear as you called Dean once again. You let out a sob, tears rushing down your face and neck, leaving behind a slightly burning trail. Your breathing became uneven, the sound of your own heart drumming through your ears drowning out the ring of your phone. Letting your phone slip to the floor, you brought your knees to your chest and folded your arms as a nest for your forehead.
Neither of the boys called within the twenty minutes you were in the bathroom, your phone was now close to being dead, and no muscle in your body wanted to obey your brain telling them to move and do something. You weren’t a weak woman, you took the cards you were dealt and tried your best to win, but sometimes all you could do was fold.
“Y/N? Y/N?”
A hand pulled your face from your knees, and you could barely see with the light of the bathroom now on and blinding you. A warm hand rested against your cheek while another briefly touched your forehead.
“Help me get her up, Sammy,” your eyes fluttered closed and you felt two arms hook under both your arms, laying them over shoulders as your feet lightly dragged across the floor.
“I’ve never seen her this bad, Dean.” The voice you now recognized as Sam said. Your legs were swept up from under you and you were laid on the bed you’d crawled out of.
You felt the tests still pressing in your pockets, and you thanked whatever greater being was willing to listen. There was no way you wanted to Dean to discover that information on accident.
Dean.
The other voice was Dean.
You moron, who else would it be?
The bed next to you dipped down, and you felt a gentle hand tuck a few stray hairs behind one of your ears. The sweat covering you was sucking every inch of clothing to your skin, and all you wanted to do was peel either of the pair off.
“I thought Cas was going to come here and help her out,” you heard his voice straining as he spoke, and you felt your heart snap in two.
You moved your hand, as heavy as it felt, and squeezed the first part of him you touched.
“Sweetheart,” you could feel Dean’s breath as he hovered over you, “you’re scaring me here.”
“Cas
” you gave out a heavy cough, “he came. He helped me figure out what’s been happening.”
A glass of water was brought to your mouth, and you took every drop of it. After swallowing the cup, your eyes finally were able to open. You were greeted by a worried Dean hovering very close to you, and a worried Sam crossing back from the kitchen holding Dean’s water bottle.
Sam set the bottle on the bedside table and sat on his bed, facing you and Dean. Dean’s attention was solely on you. His hands grabbed both sides of your face and brought his lips to your forehead, before resting against it.
“Hey,” you said, chuckling slightly, “I didn’t mean to scare you, De. You, or Sam.” You sat yourself up in bed.
“Did Cas tell you what’s wrong?” Sam asked, looking at you expectantly.
“He did, but
 is it okay if I talk to Dean? Alone?” You asked softly.
Sam shot Dean a look, which Dean promptly returned with one that had Sam standing up, and walking into the hall.
Orange rays of light shone from the window of the room, and you could just barely see the sun climbing on the horizon. Dean moved to hold you in bed while you gained the composure to tell him you were both parents.
“Dean
” you breathed steadily, trying to even your heartbeat that was ramping up once more, “I have to tell you something-”
“I kinda gathered as much sweetheart,” he said lightly, lines forming around his forest-lorn eyes beautifully.
“- it’s important. I mean, it’s going to change our lives, for the rest of our lives.”
Dean’s face became more serious, pulling you to face him as he crossed his legs.
“You know you can tell me anything, Y/N.”
Do it, now. Just say-
“I’m pregnant.”
The air hung heavy around the pair of you as you handed him the tests in your pocket, and you could see the clocks turn in Dean’s mind as he stared down at them.
“But we used a rubber?” He said, and you could guess where his thoughts were wandering.
“We did, but you’re the only person I’ve been with for years, Dean, I need you to believe me when I say that.” You said reassuringly as you could without sounding like you were lying.
His face broke into a small smile, and he brought his thumb to trace over your lower cheek, “I know, sweetheart. I trust you with my heart, I just know not to use that brand anymore, seems like their effectiveness is questionable.”
You laughed, tears drying in your eyes as you pushed at him playfully, “Dean! You gave me a heart attack, you son of a bitch!”
“I’m sorry, I’m sorry okay!” He laughed, capturing you in a giant bear hug and rolling you on top of him. You looked down at him and brought your lips down to his.
“You’re going to be a father,” you said, beaming at him while smiling the hardest you’d ever in the longest time
“You’re going to be a mother,” he replied, smiling just as hard. Your face fell slightly, and the word mother finally kicked into your head. “Hey,” Dean said as he saw your face shift, somehow remembering the story you told him all those years ago, “Remember, we’ve got an angel on speed dial, and you know how hard it is to take out a Winchester.”
Your heart warmed at the statement, the baby inside of you was just as much L/N as it was Winchester. You loved Dean with your heart, as did he love you, and now the two of you were going to brace the dangerous world you’d spent years protecting with the amalgamation of that love.
You brought Dean’s hand to your stomach as he brought his other hand to your face. His calloused fingers were gentle on your skin, and small crinkles formed around his eyes as he smiled, holding his hand at your stomach as you gazed back at him.
A knock sounded at the door, making you turn your head around before you and Dean burst into laughter, and told Sam he could come back in the room to tell him the news.
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fictionismyreality3 · 9 months ago
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Learned your lesson? (18+)
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Simon Riley x Reader
Tags: Smut, daddy!simon, angry!simon
Warnings: romance and everything that comes with it, thigh riding, daddy kink, face slapping, slight impact play, spanking, face fucking, hair pulling, choking, exhibitionism if you squint
Notes: absolute dEBaUchErY đŸ€Ș but I have no regrets đŸ€­ gimme a chance and I’d let Simon ruin my-
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In hindsight, the situation you were in was probably your fault.
You hadn’t meant to make Simon angry, and he wasn’t really, but you were being a brat. In your defence, having him away from you all the time got a little lonely, and you could only fuck yourself with the dildo he got you so many times before you started wanting the real thing.
That’s why you had blown up his phone all day, sending him video after video of you fucking yourself in every room of your apartment, moaning his name as you came. In the back of your mind, you knew it was a bad idea, but it felt so deliciously good to imagine his eyes widening as he stood on base and got all your little gifts, especially when you were riding the dildo with his t-shirt on.
Your hands gripped the black marble countertop of your shared bathroom as you bounced your ass back against the wall, the hyper-realistic dildo hitting you just right. When Simon showed up with a clone-a-willy kit in hand before a long deployment, you nearly spat out the soda you were drinking.
“What the fuck is that?” You managed to sputter as you coughed, trying not to spit soda all over the living room carpet.
“Your stress reliever, luv’.” Simon’s eyes sparked behind his balaclava as he chuckled with mirth.
The rest of that night consisted of you whispering in his ear and tracing his neck with your tongue, keeping him hard as you carried out your diy sex toy production.
And now, as you fucked yourself on your clone of Simon’s cock, your phone propped up to record, the dildo did its job, but it wasn’t Simon.
It wasn’t him.
That’s why you made sure to look directly into the camera as you felt the familiar sparks building up in your core, and when you came, you let him know how much you missed him.
What you couldn’t have known, was that the wifi on base was horrendous. You’d think with the budget going towards the military, they could at least invest in a new router, but no. Simon often had to struggle through paperwork, which he already detested, waiting for the tiniest files to load. In your eagerness to tease him, you sent all the videos at once, but couldn’t have known that they’d take ages to get delivered.
By the time they reached their destination, blowing up Simon’s phone all at once, it was hours after you’d initially hit send. It was nearly impossible for him to be away from you as it is. As soon as he saw your face the day you met, he knew that he’d be needing you for the rest of his life.
He didn’t like leaving you and he didn’t like sharing.
Two weeks away from the only reminder of having a normal life was already painstaking. It was the last day on base and Simon was counting down the minutes till he could get home and show you how much he missed you. The time spent rubbing himself in the barracks bathroom, jerking his cock to the thought of you, all it had done was provide temporary relief. He needed the real thing.
He needed to be buried so deep in your tight little cunt that he made himself a part of you with each thrust.
Simon was counting down the minutes as he sat through the last briefing of the day, just a few hours away from getting to let out all his pent up tension, when his phone began to buzz endlessly. His heart spiked, threatening to burst from his throat as he saw the texts from you. Instantly, the worst case scenarios of what could’ve happened ran through his mind. He wasn’t a paranoid man by any means, but when it came to you, the only thing that mattered more that keeping you happy was your safety.
What if something happened? What if you were hurt? What if you’d been taken hostage and someone was sending him videos of you being tortured?
Okay, so, maybe a little paranoid.
Not wanting to wait in agonizing curiosity, he clicked open the attachment.
Within seconds, sounds of your wanton moaning filled the room, your breathy whimpers of his name silencing the rest of the 141 who had been debriefing. All eyes snapped to Simon as he fumbled with his phone, dropping it to the floor in his haste to mute the video. This interrupted Soap’s guffawing, as his eyes locked on the screen, the video of you riding the dildo he got you playing on repeat.
“Jesus Christ, Lt! Tha’ yer woman? She’s a sight to-” Gaz smacked him upside the head as Price tried to avert his eyes, clearing his throat.
“Watch your fuckin’ eyes, Johnny, before I rip ‘em outta your skull.” Simon snapped.
Finally, he managed to switch the video off, but the damage was done. Even though he sat as still as a statue for the rest of the brief, his balaclava hidden face betraying no emotion despite Soap’s repeatedly cheeky comments, Simon was livid.
From the time he first took you, he ruined you for anyone else. Nobody could replace him, nobody could break you or make you scream like he did. But you’d ruined everything else for him too. And just the thought of someone else getting to have you, getting to touch even an inch of your skin, was enough that he had to ball his fists so as not to throttle Johnny’s neck.
He trusted his guys with his life, even if he’d never tell them that. But this was different.
This was you.
While you giggling conspiratorially to yourself, thinking about the fun you’d have with him when he got home, Simon was whiteknuckling the wheel of his truck, trying not to break the speed limit to get home to you faster. His cock was achingly hard as he ran over how he planned to punish you again and again in his mind. You’d love every second of it, he always made sure you did, but he wanted to tease you just like you did him.
This is what he loved about you. How you were so eager to please, but so eager to rile him up, it was the perfect combination to make Simon’s cock scream at him to fuck your pretty throat.
He nearly ran a stop sign imaging cumming in your greedy mouth.
His dirty girl.
His greedy girl. He definitely couldn’t give you the usual treatment this time. The thought of your ass marked up with his handprints after a spanking was tempting, but you would enjoy it far too much. He wanted to see you struggle to get even the slightest bit of relief after the stunt you pulled.
The rumbling of his truck signalled his arrival to your keen ears, and you jumped up from the couch, running to the front door of the cozy house you’d bought together to stand on the porch waiting for him.
Simon got out of his truck. He knew you were standing there, where you always were to welcome him home after a deployment, but he didn’t look at you. Getting his gear bag from the back, he slung it over his shoulders and trudged up the front stairs. His kit was well over 100 pounds, but he still managed to carry it with one hand. The other hand shot out to wrap around your throat, causing you to stumble on your feet.
“Simo-” Your greeting was cut of by your now restricted air supply, and your hands instinctively clawed at his grip on your throat. He didn’t utter a word, only reached around you to open the door, pushing you inside as he followed, closing it with his foot.
You were pinned up against the wall as soon as his gear bag had hit the ground, and you could already hear his ragged breaths.
“D’you have any idea,” He huffed, trying to restrain himself from just fucking you against the wall. “how much shit you’re in for
 love?” He ground out the pet name like it took effort for him to keep from swearing even more.
You quickly ran through everything that you could have done wrong in your mind. Sure, you’d been a brat all day, but Simon liked when you were bratty from time to time. Nothing you could think of could explain the tightly contained anger that was rippling off of him.
“What? Did you not like the videos?” You managed to say breathily, the grip on your throat keeping you perched on the edge of loosing your breath. “Did I not like the-” Simon stopped to let out a low, raspy chuckle, his head dropping to the crook of your neck.
“I loved the videos, sweetheart. An’ so did the boys.” He whispered slowly into your ear.
Immediately your face scrunched up as you tried to decipher what he meant.
“What do you mean, Si? I only
.oh.” The reality of your mistake hit you all at once.
Oh.
How could you have forgotten that Simon would probably be around the rest of the 141, not to mention how inept with technology he was. No wonder the rest of the team saw you. Your swirling thoughts were broken up by Simon releasing your throat, only to grab your arm, and roughly drag you over to the couch.
“‘Oh’ is right, luv’.” He murmured as he sat down, pulling you on top of his lap to straddle him. Your hands instinctively went for his balaclava, wanting to take it off and see his face, a permission only you were granted.
Before your fingers could even meet the fabric, Simon was grabbing both your wrists with one hand, pinning them to your lap. You really had poked the bear in all senses of the word. Simon was utterly massive, and he could easily palm any part of you that would take most people two hands to hold.
With his free hand, he pushed his balaclava up so it rested just underneath his nose, his lips free to kiss you. Your stomach was churning with a mix of apprehension and excitement. You knew the look in his eyes, the look he only got when he was going to break you. It was nearly impossible to keep from leaning down and pressing a kiss to his inviting lips, but you knew that you were already in as much trouble as it was.
With the way you were straddling his lap, the thin material of your shorts allowed you to feel his cock growing ridged underneath you. Heat bloomed in your core and Simon’s grip on your wrists suddenly felt electric.
“You’re a greedy cockslut, aren’t you?” He slipped the hand which wasn’t keeping your wrists trapped underneath your shirt. “So desperate you jus’ had to be a brat, hm? Had to let everyone see wha’ a needy girl you are.”
The low, condescending tone of his voice made your head swim, and your breaths began to come faster and faster as he palmed your tits, beginning to play with your nipples. You couldn’t exactly be sorry when he was making you feel so good, but there was still some guilt in the back of your mind for putting him on the spot.
“Simon, I’m-” Simon’s large hand slapped you lightly across the cheek, tugging your hair to refocus your gaze on him. “Don’t fuckin’ call me that.” He pinched your nipple hard, causing you to reel forwards into his chest.
“What’s my fuckin’ name, huh? Only good girls get t’call me Simon.” He dug his fingers into the skin of your wrists, the pain warning you of what would come if you weren’t more obedient.
“
daddy?” You tried quietly.
Simon’s grip on your wrists lessened instantly, and his hands began to tease at your tits again. The whiplash of pain to pleasure was something that he had perfected, and he loved the way you’d bite your lip as you struggled to catch up. All it took was just getting you to call him daddy and he could already feel you melting in his lap, your eyes getting half lidded and foggy.
“That’s right, bunny. And daddy teaches his baby how to behave doesn’t he?” Simon said expectantly, beginning to peel off his t-shirt you were wearing.
“Y-yes, daddy.” The cold air hit your skin, sending a shiver through body as you were left in just your thin pajama shorts, straddling your hulk of a boyfriend. Without the t-shirt in the way, Simon had easy access to your gorgeous tits, and took the opportunity to take a nipple in between his teeth, his other hand running up and down your back.
He was rock hard by now, the feeling of your soft skin on top of him sending his mind into a buzzing haze of desire. All he wanted to do was rut up into that precious pussy of yours and make you cum around his cock. But he had to be patient. He had to make sure you knew what you did wrong.
As soon as he felt you begin to rock your hips, a movement so imperceptible that only those who knew you would realize what you want, he gripped your thighs hard enough to leave bruises. Simon’s eyes were narrowed in warning, and a dark chuckled left his throat.
“You’re so greedy.” He growled, his fingers digging into your thighs. “Show daddy you’re more than jus’ a needy little girl.”
“How, daddy?” You breathed.
A whine fell from your lips as you slipped further away from being rational, your head fuzzy with want as you felt Simon’s cock pressed underneath you.
“Can’t get off without my cock, hm?” He thought back to the videos of you fucking yourself on the dildo he got you. Simon loosened his grip on your hips, allowing you to move, only to shifted you so that he could tear your pajama shorts off. He lifted you slightly so that you were straddling one of his thighs instead.
“You wanna cum s’badly? You need it s’much that you’re a brat?”
“Fuck yourself on my thigh then, luvie.”
Your breath left you in one big whoosh, and the moment Simon gave you permission to move, you were grinding down on his thigh. The fabric of his jeans rubbed against your clit, sending little jolts of pleasure through you.
Simon watched as your eyes got droopy, half opened through your haze of pleasure. He was still angry but right now all he could focus on was how pretty you looked. Your cheeks all flushed from his words and the exertion of grinding on him, your little hands holding onto his shoulders, and the wet spot on your panties.
“That’s it, pretty. Jus’ like that.” He groaned.
His cock felt impossibly hard, raging with need every time he looked at the way your tits bounced. Fumbling with his belt, he pulled his cock out. The noise caught your attention, and you faltered, going to reach for him. You didn’t get very far, because as soon as Simon felt you stop moving, he delivered two quick spanks to your ass.
You cried out in surprise and pain as he fisted one hand in your hair, and the other around his leaking cock. His hands were so big it made him look normal sized, but you knew he was easily almost ten inches.
“Such a whore.” He whispered, pulling your hair so your head was forced back. “Jus’ had t’get my cock in your mouth.”
Simon stroked himself lazily, savouring the wave of heat which coursed through him every time he ran a thumb over his tip. It wasn’t your touch, but it would do for now. Your gaze was forced to the ceiling as Simon kept you locked in position, observing you like his own personal work of art. The sound of his quiet groans filling your ears was torturous knowing you weren’t allowed to touch him. You could feel yourself leaking into his jeans, and knew he no doubt felt it too.
“Are you- oh, gonna be a good girl f’me?” His mouth latched on your exposed neck as he sucked a hickey into your skin, marking you as his. You were panting, practically trembling as he forced you to keep still. Simon was closer than he’d like to admit. It had been weeks since he’d touched you and just seeing you writhing on lap, trying to get whatever friction you could, made his cock leak.
“Say it, bunny.” He rasped into your ear, pressing a kiss to your jaw.
“I’ve learned my lesson, daddy. Please, can I
” You trailed off, afraid that if you asked for his cock you’d seem ever more needy.
But Simon was thrilled.
Having the love of his life, almost naked on his lap, desperate to touch him was like a dream. The hand in your hair pushed your head down, his palm big enough to cover the back of your head.
“Suck.” He growled.
Rubbing the head of his cock along your mouth, demanding entrance, you parted your lips. Simon pushed inside of your mouth, heavy on your tongue as he let out a long, drawn out groan you wished you could have on repeat.
“Shit, sweathear’- oh, fuck..” He hissed. You could feel him twitching in your mouth.
He tried to focus on anything but the warm, wet-
Oh, god.
Simon bucked his hips up and began to fuck into you without warning, sending your hands shooting out to his stomach to catch yourself. His cock hit the roof of your mouth and your throat tightened on reflex as you tried not to gag. You could feel Simon’s nails digging into your scalp as he bobbed your head up and down.
“Sorry, luv’ I jus’,” He squeezed his eyes shut, focusing on the feeling of your lips around him. “Been achin’ for you, bunny. All those videos y’sent me.” He moaned, no longer able to keep himself from being gentle.
“Let daddy cum in y’mouth, sweetheart.”
The words flooded your pussy with heat, and Simon took notice of the way you moaned around his cock. He was strict, but he wasn’t cruel, and you had been good so far. Taking a little pity on you, Simon used his free hand to grab your hip, bouncing his leg so you could get a little relief. The sudden stimulation sent your dripping cunt into overdrive, and as Simon rammed his cock into your throat, you began to rut against his thigh.
He would’ve told you to keep your eyes on him, but they looked so pretty rolling back into your head.
“Yeah, yeah jus’ like that.” He said, his voice raspy as he tried to hold himself back. “Be good for daddy. Get close, luv’.”
You didn’t have to try with the way your cunt was clenching around nothing. Every bounce of his leg rubbed your clit against his jeans, and he pushed you further by holding your hip to help you grind against him. You could feel yourself teetering on the edge of release, and Simon knew it too with the way you were moaning around his cock. Every noise you made sent a vibration through him, and he began to fuck your mouth with abandon, his balls tightening in anticipation.
“Oh, god. Oh f-fuck, bunny keep-” He spasmed in your mouth. “Keep suckin’ just like tha’. Daddy’s gonna cum in your pretty lil’ mouth.”
His words made your head spin. The only thought on your mind was drawing as much pleasure from him as you could, so you took his balls in your hand, rolling them a few times to push him over the edge. Your core was fluttering with need as you rutted against Simon’s leg, which he kept bouncing, hitting your swollen clit mercilessly. It was too much for both of you after weeks without each other.
Simon’s hand left your hip so he could tangle both hands in your hair, the need for his own pleasure taking over. You managed to glance up, wanting to see his face as he came.
“Luvie.. luvie, oh sweatheart.” His mouth hung open as he let out a noise he didn’t know he could make. The sight of you grinding desperately against his thigh tipped him over the edge.
“Oh, fuck. Bun-”
Ropes of hot, thick cum shot down your throat, filling your mouth and spilling past your lips. The taste of Simon on your tounge was enough to break you. Your mind shattered as you began rutting on his thigh, not caring how needy you looked, the heat in your pussy sent you spiralling. Your orgasm hit you like a freight train, and you gushed all over Simon’s leg as he pressed himself so deep into your mouth that your nose hit his stomach.
He sent the last of his load down your throat and pulled your head up as you gasped for air. The world was fuzzy, but you felt two big, strong arms pulling you up from where you’d collapsed forward onto Simon’s stomach.
Taking you into his lap, he ran a hand through your hair as he rubbed your back in slow, comforting circles. His cock lay resting against his stomach, big even when it was getting soft. Simon’s hand found your chin and he turned your gaze to his, helping you come back to reality by taking off his balaclava to let you see his face.
“Did so good f’me, pretty.” He pressed a kiss to your nose, making you giggle.
“Thank you, daddy.” You managed to say, your eyes getting droopy as sleepiness began to creep in.
“I think you learned your lesson, sweetheart.” He mused, noticing your breaths begin to slow. “Jus’ rest here, luv’.”
“Daddy’s got you.”
Simon watched with reverence as your head rested against his shoulder, your flushed cheeks making you look even cuter than you did choking on his cock. This was good. This was right. He’d take care of you forever, he knew it from the moment he saw you. You didn’t realize yet, but you had one hell of a guardian angel on your side.
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winterzsurprise · 3 months ago
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Change My Mind [2]
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Pairing: BTS x reader
SUMMARY: As a make-up artist, you were expected to glamorize your clients with brushes and products that cost a week-worth of food, not to befriend them outside of work, let alone have them save you from dates yet here you are five years later as one of their closest confidants.
Being a stylist of the world's biggest boyband is no easy feat, someone is doing flips, someone can't stay still and one's asleep but its fine, you can work around their chaos but then one day, you find out they're all your soulmates, a whole different can of chaos you don't think you can handle.
Tags: Soulmates AU, Friends to Lovers, Eventual Smut, Not Beta Read, Slow Build, Polyamory, Attempts at Humor
Words: 8.6k
I posted this a day later than the one on ao3 because I forgor :''DD
Seeing the support and comments from both website got me off my ass to fix the storyline, even made a lot of changes on the chapters I've had preserved.
this chapter got rewritten a LOT, and was longer than it initially was so I hope y'all don't mind long chapters.
<<<Prev || MASTERLIST || Next>>>
__________
There's been times where your heart has truly fluttered for a man throughout your lifetime. Too many times has it been because some of your bosses (read: Jimin) flirted with you but you have never felt anything remotely giddy for anyone else outside the group.
Except for the man now sitting in front of you, flashing you a dimpled smile after handing out his card with an ease you only see in your friends and male leads in dramas. An action more attractive than any kabaedon or flexed muscles.
He's attractive but you don't like like him.
Yoo Guwon came to you as a bashful giant, rubbing the back of his head whenever he’s flustered and a constant sheepish smile featuring his deep set of dimples indented on both cheeks. He’s charming and articulate with his words just like a lawyer would be. Everything about him reminds you of another gentle and clumsy giant probably hunched over his music equipment back in the BigHit building.
It’s only been a few hours but you surprisingly covered most of the basic grounds of first meeting conversations during the short time you drove around Han River in a two seated bicycle. From the meager questions of ‘what dreams do you have?’ to the more complex and deeper ‘If the world falls into ruin, will you burn my body when I die?’. 
Too graphic for a first date but you wanted to test the waters and you concluded that he’s too perfect.
He knows the right words to say, the proper way to act and it makes you suspicious. Your mother has never recommended you to a good guy before, having a track record of ten shitty suitors who all ran their mouths about their mediocre achievements, and dared to ask you about your purity before ranting about how dirty you are for not saving yourself for your husband the moment they find out you're not a virgin anymore. Then all of a sudden, she led you to good boy Guwon.
And it makes your skin crawl.
What did that woman eat? Has your father fed her something bad this time? What is she planning? It’s scary how she has finally advocated for an actual nice guy.
After taking you to a museum you're sure Namjoon has visited once, he drove you both to the Han River to rent a double seated bike to drive around with before ending the night with a nice reservation somewhere in the Seocho district.
The place is as sophisticated as fine dining areas usually are. With an intimate lighting, marbled tabletops matched with soft cushioned seats and high ceilings to make space for modern glass chandeliers, the restaurant was no doubt expensive, the type you have to reserve a spot two months prior to be able to experience its greatness. The point was driven home when you saw the amount of zeros it cost for one can of soda. 
You asked him how he managed to get a table and he went down the rabbit hole of the many advantages he got from successful cases, ranging from a free monthly subscription to fruit baskets to a free week-long voucher to a five star hotel somewhere in Busan. 
Going back to the butterflies, while not as wild as it got when Hoseok possessively wrapped an arm thrown around your waist to pretend as your boyfriend to ward off a persistent suitor, they're there, albeit subtle.
Very subtle.
Maybe it's in the way he didn't think twice to hand out his card towards the waiter in the most suave way with the thick golden watch decorating his wrist, sleeves neatly folded up to reveal the thick cords of veins on his forearms with his hair strewn messily and a dimpled smile that made you react like that.
You ignore the voice comparing his uncannily similar traits to someone else.
Meeting Guwon wasn't like how the movies illustrated love at first sights. They talked of fireworks exploding in the background and hearing the sweet chimes of wedding bells upon eye contact but for him, it's just that. A meeting far more formal than you'd like. He has a lot of qualities that check your list of husband material traits yet instead of butterflies, you could only feel an echoing hollowness in your chest as you listen to him list out his future plans. 
It felt like surrendering to the fate the divinities had weaved out for you which is being an untethered forced to love someone you don't even feel any spark with.
He's a nice man who’s offering a comfortable future and you're just a woman who wishes to live a lavish life at home while your husband wastes his years away in the office. You might be a hopeless romantic who wished for soulmates and the like but you're not blind to the opportunity Guwon offers you.
You haven't texted the gc anything during the date other than the selfie you took before you left for the date but there's been constant vibrations in your purse and it's no doubt the guys asking for updates but for a moment you wanted to try to focus on the man before you.
Not that it wasn't hard to try with Guwon anyways.
Whenever the man spoke of his achievements and hobbies with a humble approach, he never forgot to ask you for your opinion or input on the topic. You also noted how he has never cut you off and let you speak whenever you wanted, listening with an eagerness only your friends usually show. He asked relevant questions with a genuine curiosity, eager to know more about you. 
So when he asked if you wanted to go on a second date that night, it came to no surprise for anyone when you accepted it albeit the heaviness in your heart.
It was funny how eagerly you searched for a husband you could bring to your parents' doorsteps but the moment someone with all the qualities you seeked came, it felt disappointing. Boring even.
But you can learn, this man is your ticket to living without working anymore.
It came to no one's surprise that your mother was overjoyed, she wasted no time calling you before you could even change to squeeze the memory of today out of you.
The shrill scream of victory she let out that night was unforgettable because finally, a suitor you actually liked. Your dad even congratulated her off-screen for her matchmaking achievements before telling you to bring Guwon home to meet them.
Logically, you’re aware you've won the love roulette—Guwon has it all, he checked every box on your list, yet it felt like defeat and it tasted foul, bitter on your tongue.
You couldn't tell them that it was you deciding to settle, that would break her heart.
Tapping the end call button felt like the dam breaking and all the water held onto for so long flowed out. You fall lifelessly on your bed with a heavy sigh. Taking a couple evening breaths, you finally opened the group chat with an overwhelming number of unread messages.
[Today, 08:49]
[08:49] Mimi: I'd run my bank dry to take you on dates if you'd dress so pretty like that, noona~
[08:49]Tete: We're really seeing this for free when the poor guy has to pay for it. #livingapriviledgedlife😁👍
[08:49] Hobi: Wow noonađŸ€Ż
[08:50] Yoongs: 👍
[08:55] Tete: Wait, I don't think those shoes fit you, go back home and change it😁
[08:56] Jinnie: Hey, you're showing too much skin on the first date! Go back and change!
[08:57] Joonie: Ignore these haters noona, I hope you enjoy your day😊
[Today, 21:48]
[21:48] Jinnie: are you home yet? You haven't seen our messages in HOURS.
[21:48] Tete: NOONA DID YOU GET MURDERED?!đŸ˜±
[21:50] Joonie: Let's be rational guys, don't jump to conclusions. The date might just be going great if she's busy enough to not check her phone😊.
[21:51] Mimi: doing great? don't scare me like that hyungđŸ˜”â€đŸ’«
[21:51] Tete: BUT WHAT IF SHE GOT KIDNAPPED HYUNG????
[21:51] Hobi: please reply soon, we're worriedđŸ„Č
Jungkook's absence from the conversation didn't come to you as a shock, the kid doesn't even reply to you for a week despite being one of the people who raised him. Nonetheless, you sat up from your bed to record a quick video of you giving them a thumbs up and turning the camera to show your room.
The latter was an assurance to Taehyung that no, you also didn't get kidnapped into someone else's house to be someone's housekeeper, and no, it wasn't a clone either.
The moment your message gets sent, the replies blow up your phone almost instantaneously.
[22:28] Mimi: noona you're alive!
[22:28] Joonie: How did the date go?😊
[22:28] Jinnie: how nice of you to remember to update us PEASANTS.
[22:28] Mimi: How was Guwon?
[22:29] Tete: I KNEW WE SHOULD'VE WENT WITH YOU ANYWAYS
[22:29] You: Shockingly, he's a pretty nice guy. Not too bad on the eyes, and pretty smart. I think you'd get along well with him, joon. He's a lawyer so he covered most of the expenses today😁
[22:29] You: Overall, it was great, we're gonna go on a second one. He's pretty cool.
Instantly, messages from the members, even Jungkook’s to your surprise, flooded your screen.
[22:30] Tete: Noona you've been cursed! We need to bring you to the nearest shaman to break it!!
[22:30] Mimi: don't joke with us noona
[22:30] Mimi: I just got goosebumps!
[22:30] Joonie: Congratulations are in order then? Will we be expecting him around you soon?
[22:31] Yoongs: I need to meet him, need to know if he's good enough
[22:31] Yoongs: men are trash, I need to see him for myself before I decide
[22:32] Yoongs: and you know what they say about lawyers, they LIE. I wouldn't trust him 
[22:32] Jinnie: WE need to meet the man who managed to steal your heart! I want to talk to him😊
[22:32] Mimi: don't use that emoji again, hyung
[22:32] Hobi: SCARY JWANNđŸ˜±
[22:32] Joonie: Let’s not threaten anyone please.
[22:32] Joonie: But I'm really happy for you 😁.
[22:33] Tete: Those periods really scares me hyung

[22:33] Tete: Somehow, I don't think you mean it

[22:33] Joonie: What makes you think that, tae?😁.
[22:33] Tete: 😰
[22:34] Ggukie: a few drinks will fix you up, noona😁
[22:34]  Mimi: you'll invite me this time right?
[22:34] You: I don't know, you already used your mischief hours this week, I doubt Sejin would be so kind next time.
[22:34] Hobi: if he does that right now during practice, I also wouldn't be so kind to him😊
[22:34] Mimi: you are scaring me hyung

[22:34] Hobi: good😊
[22:34] Tete: Hyung, are you just gonna ignore Jungkook leaving?!?!!?
The messages continued for a good five minutes, mostly consisting of holding Jimin back from leaving practice and him sending pictures of the infamous Hoseok death glare from across the room before your doorbell chime rang, making you shoot up straight.
A beat. Then it continues in three quick successions, the knocks almost in sing-song and sounded like two hands were used to produce the tune, giving you an inkling on who might be visiting you at this late hours of night.
Padding out of your room, the front door suddenly swings open without warning and you yelp. By the doorsteps stands the intruder, a tall man in a black coat with his face hidden by a mask and a cap. Your body would've frozen a thousand times over if you didn't know this stranger who's hugging two paper bags, one overflowing with snacks and the other a breeze away from tearing apart from the weight and water drenching the material of the bag.
"Hi noona!"
After today, seeing Jungkook felt like a cure, his presence alone repelling the heaviness in your shoulders and you ushered him inside and he wandered into your home with ease, approaching the coffee table to place down the shopping bags. 
Suddenly you remembered what he had scheduled prior.
"You're putting me on Hoba’s punishment rotation, what are you doing here?" 
He giggled. “We both know he won't, hyung loves you more than me.”
He falls on your couch with the ease of someone who has visited your space numerous times throughout the years, propping up his feet on the back support and folding his arms underneath his head before staring up at you, expectantly.
"Anyways, I brought us food and drinks, don't I deserve a little praise?" 
Sometimes it's easy to forget how young Jungkook really is, forced to grow and act mature to blend in with his surroundings, you've always seen him stand with pride alongside his hyungs. Seeing him awaiting for your praise so eagerly like a pup fills your heart with awe.
"Yeah yeah, good job. Now move over, let me sit down."
You tapped his arm, motioning him to move over so you could sit next to him, something he obeyed without resistance, busying himself in removing the contents from the soiled paper bag instead.
“Couldn't you have put some effort into it? At least sound grateful.” He pouts. Placing down the cluster of beer cans, you turned to him and pinched his cheeks.
“Oh my dearest darling, thank you for saving this noona of yours. Such an amazing baby I have here.”
Despite being the one who asked for it, Jungkook only rolled his eyes with a barely held back grin as he slapped your hands away, making you laugh, and turned to the bag holding the snacks he bought. You didn't miss the redness dusting his cheeks or the cheeky grin that tugged his lips wide as he spilled the contents of the last bag onto the table.
There's a significant amount of sweets and snacks laid before you, as well as stacks of canned beers and you turned to him with furrowed brows.
"Wouldn't this ruin your diet?"
He waved you off with a huff. "I work out enough to eat all of these in one sitting."
Instantly, your mind brings you back to white walls and gray furniture, faced with manager Sejin who warned you about interfering with the idols' diet at the start of your career. If it wasn't for Bang PD waving off their concerns, saying they needed to be rewarded for their hard work anyways, you would've been long booted out of the company.
It's a matter long settled yet it remains to weigh heavily in your head.
Seeing the hesitation in your eyes, Jungkook continues.
"I can show you proof of my efforts," 
He then reached down to the fabric of his shirt tucked into his jeans and tugged it up, flashing you the tightly corded muscles in forming on his abdomen and the thin happy trail you often see when patting his sweat down during concerts and you hastily pulled it back down with a yelp, cheeks growing hot while he laughed.
As he throws his head back in his mirth, you couldn't help but notice the way adulthood has taken away the fullness of his cheeks and has sharpened his features. A far cry from the sensitive young boy who cried his eyes out every time his hyungs got hurt. 
There was no denying that Jungkook had grown without you noticing and it makes your chest swell with pride knowing he's been raised well by the others, in extension, although not so much, you as well.
"Don't worry so much about me, noona. I can handle the consequences now, you leave the reprimanding to me."
Under the warm overhead light of your living room, even with the exaggerated puff of his chest and his nose turnt up high, Jungkook's shoulder had never looked sturdier, reliable, in your eyes. You smiled, reaching to pinch both his cheeks making him grin wider than he already was.
"Look at you acting so cool, when did you grow so much?"
He rolled his eyes, pulling your hands away from his cheeks and entangling it with his. “I've always been cool, you just don't pay attention to me, noona.”
Before you could reply, he's already moved to reach for the beverages on the coffee table, popping two of them open and handing you one can, immediately you take a swig.
The beer fizzled in your tongue and left a trail of burns down your throat. The sensation is refreshing nonetheless and you place it down next to him before picking up the large bags of chips and standing up.
"I'll go put these in a bowl, go put something on the tv."
"Can I play anime?"
You waved at him dismissively, unable to find it in yourself to say no to him as you head towards your kitchen to transfer the junk into a bowl when a shrill tune from your bedroom cuts through the air, someone was calling you. You look over to Jungkook, scrolling through his phone, no doubt looking for a movie online.
"Gguk, can you pick up the call for me? My hands are busy right now."
There's a shuffle of feet behind you and in a moment, your phone quietens down. Finished with filling one bowl, you turn to find Jungkook leaving your room with a deep look and your phone in hand. His jaw set tight as he stood there with furrowed brows, eyes lit with irritation.
Looking at his reaction, you asked about your mysterious caller.
"Who was it?"
When he turned to you, the tick in his jaw dispersed. All of a sudden, he's smiling at you with mischief twinkling in his eyes, the change giving you a whiplash.
"It was the others, didn’t answer their calls cause I want you for myself tonight, noona."
(Later on, you'd find yourself staring at the many unread messages and two missed calls from Guwon, wondering in your drunken state if you've muted your phone at some point earlier.)
Hearing it from his lips now, your body locks, heart stuttering in your chest and butterflies exploding in your stomach, spreading a tingly feeling throughout your body and you laugh. 
"Where did you hear that line from, brat? You just activated my fight or flight!"
"Taehyung says that and gets thanked but when I do it, I'm punished?" He pouts, stomping as he approaches the island counters and crossing his arms on the marble surface.
It reminded you of a bunny you saw from a video on the internet, angrily thumping their feet at their owner when it was being purposely ignored.
“In his defense, he does it while he’s acting like my crazy ‘exes’ and saves me from dates.”
“That’s just favoritism! I saved you once from a date!”
You threw him a deadpan stare. "Throwing me over your shoulders and kidnapping me isn’t the same as Tae and Jimin acting crazy enough to make the other guy uncomfortable to save me.”
Hoseok had your favorite troublemakers kneeled on the floor with both their hands up and facing the wall at the time, punishing them for being an hour late to their practice. He had called you in, asking if they had been accompanying you during —they weren’t. 
Long story short, you didn't risk sharing Hoseok’s wrath with the two and took Jungkook instead, a decision you quickly regretted later on in the night when instead of approaching to act like one of your exes when you gave him a signal, he hoisted you up onto his shoulder and ran away while your date only watched in terror.
“Now that’s blatant favoritism! I didn’t kidnap you, we ran away together into the sunset! It was romantic!"
"Not for the other guy, no! He was shitting bricks when he called my mom. She got me squatting the entire afternoon when we met again."
Mentioning it alone made phantom pains throb in your knees and thighs, you shivered. If torture wasn't a socially unacceptable and punishable offense in the modern world, you were sure your mother would have stripped you down to your underwear and made you squat under the sun in front of your family house instead. 
The absolute fury she unleashed on you that day is enough proof that she would've done it with no hesitation if it was lawfully appropriate.
"That's too much for a failed date."
"No reason to dwell on it. Main point is, don't take notes from dramas anymore."
With a last roll of his eye, Jungkook then picked up the bowls and brought them to the coffee table following you who had returned to your seat ahead of him. Once the two of you are situated back on the couch, he navigates through the streaming app for an interesting title before eventually settling on the romance anime he claimed to have heard amazing reviews about.
Without hesitation, Jungkook navigates himself into a familiar between your legs and leaned back on your chest, head finding his rightful space under your chin with a precision gained from doing so for years.
It goes without saying that Bangtan is affectionate. With the pressure they had during their rise to fame, it wasn't shocking that they comfortably seeked each other's comfort and spared no skinship. As one of the only staff within constant exposure that's close to their age, you too became one of their pillars of serenity. 
It was the reason you had crushes on everyone at least twice during your time as their make-up artist, not that any of the boys knew nor does it matter.
Stability and work takes precedence over something as shaky as love.
There's only so much comfort another man can offer, your mother says from years before.
Jungkook more than anyone else in the group. 
As a boy who sacrificed his childhood and time with his parents to pursue his dream, you felt more inclined to watch over him than the others who were adults by the time you joined. You were there for his first heartbreak, his first drink, his high school graduation; the point is, you were there and you held him every time he struggled with problems—mostly girl problems—he's too shy to seek his hyungs for.
But now with his growth spurt, cuddling up to you like he used to when he was younger with his gangly legs awkwardly hanging from the couch, carelessly leaning his head in between the mounds of your breast while his large hand mindlessly drew circles on your knee, you found yourself wondering about the appropriateness of it all.
A man and a woman alone in a room at night in close proximity, body leaning against each other. Society would argue they wouldn’t end the night as friends anymore after the encounter.
You paused mid-drink and grimaced.
It must be the beer talking.
"Noona."
"Yeah?"
"Wrap your arms around me, it's cold."
You raised an eyebrow at him. "It's not though? I always keep my house warm." 
He let out an exasperated groan before reaching behind to grab your arm and roughly slinging it on his shoulders.
As time continued its cycle and episodes started to fly across the screen, the pile of opened beer cans on the table expanded. You really tried to focus on the movie but the feeling of his fingers tracing stars on your bare thigh left you oddly bothered. Jungkook has shifted his position higher at some point during the movie, his body now turned sideways, successfully squeezing himself into the small space between you and the back of the couch, legs entangling itself with yours while an arm is thrown across your body.
This position puts his nose closer to your ears and it makes you shiver. The feel of his hot breath fanning across your skin has given you more goosebumps in under an hour more than you've had throughout your life.
Even drunk, you could feel the building tension thickening around you and the will to tell him to off ebbs away with every caress of his fingers.
Gone were the innocent traces of stars and hearts on your thigh, his hand now grabbed onto your waist almost possessively, thumb rolling slow circles on your bare stomach; the motion conjuring the most unholiest of thoughts known to mankind.
When the credits started rolling, you knew you had to draw the line before you lost yourself to intoxicated thoughts and end the night with regrets.
"Time for you to go home now, your hyungs must be looking for you."
You tried prying his hand from your waist so you could reach for your phone on the table only for him to tighten around you, stopping you from moving away. He groaned, head nuzzling closer into your neck and his lips grazed your skin. 
Instantly, electric jolts shoot through your body.
"Jungkook, I need to get my phone and tell someone to fetch you from here."
"Can't I just stay the night? I'm too comfortable right now
"
The gruff in his voice and the sensation of his lips moving on your skin has your stomach fluttering and you're too drunk to address the growing heat in your abdomen but thanked the sense of professionalism seeping through the fogs of your intoxicated mind.
Managing to pry him off, you reached for your phone and opened up SMS to tell Jin to pick their youngest up.
           [01:21] You: Jwannn
           [01:21] You: can you pick up your kid from my house? He's drunk and stinkyyy
           [01:23] Jinnie: your knight in shining armor is on the way!
“Just let me stay the nighttt,” he whined into your skin.
"I don't have any more spare beds other than this couch for you to sleep in, Gguk. I turned the other room into a closet, remember?"
"I can just sleep with you on the bed, we used to do that, didn't we?"
He attempted to reach around you again but you pushed his limbs away once more before slapping his arm.
You tried not noticing how thicker and harder the muscles felt, you really did. 
"But it's different now, Gguk. Come on, go wash up and drink water, I've already told someo—"
The moment you rose to stand, his arms shot around your waist in record speed and pulled you flush to his front, nuzzling his nose on the back of your neck before he sighed. When the first hot exhale hits your skin, you flinch away but the limbs wounded tightly around your middle restrict you from moving.
You try to ignore the heat simmering under your skin but it was hard when you felt the press of his plush lips on your nape as he leans closer into your skin. 
“You always smell so nice, noona.” He whispered breathily, the sensation of his moving mouth sending shivers down your spine and you shivered.
“I-I can give you my lotion brand later, let me go so I can get it.”
“But I'm comfortable here
”
Mustering every strength left in your body, you manage to pull an arm out of the death grip he had on your body and slapped his hand. Jungkook easily ignores it.
“Come on Gguk, let me out now. This isn't appropriate.”
"How is it different now?"
The alcohol intoxicating your system loosened your grip on your inhibitions and your lips regrettably moved faster than your brain.
"You're a man now, Gguk. Honestly, we shouldn't be even doing this right now. It's inappropriate."
You try to stand once more, managing to pry him from your waist and standing up before his arms hooked around you once more and tugging you back down, this time on his lap as he burrows his head onto your back.
"Gguk?"
"Yo-you see me as a man, noona?"
As a child your mother has taught you how words could heavily influence and drastically change a situation, now as an adult, you've mastered the art of speech. But as you sit still on his thighs, body warm and inhibitions blurred by the alcohol, your loose lips have led you back to the very thing you try to avoid.
"It's hard not to think so when you've grown up this much."
In a flash, Jungkook is now hovering over your face as he places you back down on the couch, his nose a hair's width from touching yours and his hands planted on each side of your head. 
There's a feral hunger swimming in his eyes as it stared into yours, desperate and intense before it fell to the plush of your parted lips and his gaze darkens. All of a sudden, you're a prey pinned down by an apex predator who's ready to devour you at any given moment.
Fire alarms blared in your mind and you regained control over your senses.
“Jungkook.”
"Noona."
You tried wriggling out of his grasp but it was no use, he's stronger. "Get off of me, kid."
“How many times do I have to tell you that I'm not a kid anymore?”
“I'm not hearing anything out when you're acting like this, Gguk.”
He scoffed. “I just want to sleep here, in the same bed, nothing else is gonna happen. Why is it such a bad thing?”
“It's different now, Gguk. Come on, let me go.”
“How is it so different? You and Jimin hyung cuddle sometimes, I've seen you fall asleep next to Hobi hyung once, why is it different with me?”
“It's different because we're both drunk and things could happen.”
“I wouldn't mind it.” Jungkook responds with a cheeky smile. His grip on one of your wrist loosened enough that you were able to hit his arm and he giggled in response.
“But I do. It wouldn't be fair.”
Even something as small as letting one member stay at your home without the others can be the loudest announcement for the rest of the group. All those times you've rejected your friends, with reasons like ‘I don’t want to risk everything’, and ‘I don't want to hurt the others’, to turn back around to accept their youngest would be hypocritical of you.
He scoffs. "You tell us about all your stupid dates, don't you think it's more unfair for us?”
A familiar weight grows in your chest. Guilt tasted like rust on your tongue and dug into your heart with a ribbed knife. Your own late night thoughts manifesting before you and you pushed him away.
After everything, you were all friends, you trusted them more than you do with your other circle. There's not a secret left undiscussed between the eight of you so it was no surprise that you had indulged them with the details of your quest for a husband. Nobody ever raised any complaints with you sharing your days so you never thought twice about it.
It's been five years since Jin had confessed, three for Taehyung. Their eldest had confessed for the sake of him finally being able to move on after your rejection and with how he acted after, you had believed him. It was different for Taehyung who had continued to act like normal after his confession, neither dejected nor did he show signs of letting go but he did introduce a date to your group once, a year later, so you had assumed the same.
Were you wrong after all?
“Jungkook, we're drunk. Let’s talk about this tom—”
“I've never been more sober in my life than I am right now, noona.”
You didn't respond, couldn't reply.
What were you supposed to even say?
Jungkook usually obeyed you and his hyungs without hesitation, happily offering his aid whenever he could. He's the type of friend who's run himself dry just to fetch you a cup of water from the other side of the world but now as he hovers over you, he became a whole new person.
Greed has always been an irritating parasite that eats away at a person's morals but somehow in your drunken mind, you thought it looked so good on him. It fits him and his generous character the way one light clothing molds well with the dark fabrics. His familiar scent of vanilla and coconut clouded your senses, calming your panicking mind into a hush, leaving nothing but the thoughts of how his lips tasted and wondering if he’s as sweet as he smelled.
He let out a shaky exhale from through his mouth as he watched your parted lips with a rapt attention as if hypnotized by the way they subtly trembled with every breath that passed through.
In the pregnant silence of your room, his voice cuts through like a knife.
“Can I kiss you?”
He whispers against your lips, voice breaking in the middle from the weight of his request, honeyed and pleading, as if your kiss holds the answer to the problems of the world and holds the power to break him.
His hand travels up to cup your cheek oh so carefully like you're fragile china yet you feel yourself shatter under his touch.
You are losing grasp on your sober thoughts as lust starts to cloud your already compromised judgment, his request far too tempting to ignore.
Maybe a kiss wouldn’t hurt. 
But wouldn’t it be unfair for the others who have expressed their romantic intentions to you since years ago? 
It was a last ditch effort to reason with your mind and your body froze from the cold wave of realization. In the short time after his question, you recall the confessions you turned down to not ruin the relationship Bangtan has established for themselves and the bitter taste it left on your tongue.
“Jungkook
 we can’t.”
Watching his expression contort into confused hurt almost made you want to take your words back, but your mind takes you to memories of apologetic and understanding smiles you’ve received throughout the years and the aches from those moments resurfaces, squeezing your heart in a tight grip.
“I-I’m sorry I can’t control my feelings, I just wanted to tell you about it
 Thought that maybe after this, I could move on.” An apologetic voice whispers, the memory of premature confessions in the middle of a cleanup resurfacing.
“I can’t—I can’t do it to them, it’d be unfair.”
You pushed him back and he relented, letting himself be sat back onto the other side of the couch defeatedly. Despite it, his tight grip on your waist remained, pulling you flush to him and burying his face in your chest as if trying to hear the lie in your words through the beatings of your heart.
“I’m also seeing Guwon now.”
“Then don’t let me meet him. I-I don’t know if I can take it.”
It was heart wrenching and at the same time, left an uncomfortable twist in your stomach. Jungkook never had to beg since you first met him, everything he could ever want was given to him by you and his hyungs without hesitation. Hearing him plead for you to never bring Guwon around if fate had actually paired you both, it was a different kind of pain.
It felt like thorns growing and rooting its stems of pointy ends into the deepest parts of your heart. You hated this, but you don’t want to hurt any of your boys by accepting one.
Relief comes in the form of Taehyung when he busted into your apartment while Jungkook has excused himself to your bathroom to sober up just a moment before. Seokjin trails behind him, calmer than the younger man who declared his arrival with a deep voice and a loud bang of the door. You immediately thought of the elderly couple and the new family of three living next to you and internally facepalmed.
“Noona! We’ve come to take Jungkook away!”
Kim Seokjin’s face has never been more handsome when he closed the door behind him, and you verbalized your thought, leading his ears to glow red in embarrassment.
“Am I only handsome to you when I’m closing the doors?! This face that people fawn over all over the world?!”
“It’s your true calling, door guy.”
“Oh shut it hyung, you’re making my head hurt.” Jungkook mutters as he reentered the living room, looking far better than when he left.
The tension was palpable, the effect of a rejected profession still raw and thick in the small joined space of the living room and kitchen and you caught Jin's eyes as the two youngest bickered, there’s a knowing look passed between you, an unsaid ‘let’s talk later’ hanging in the air.
“Hey, just because you got to escape Hoba’s practice without scratch doesn't mean you're hot shit, show me some respect!”
Seokjin scolds, accompanied by a playful kick to their youngest’s butt. Immediately the stuffy air dissipates and Jungkook responds in kind; by kicking him in the shin, hard enough to launch Seokjin into another lengthy nag.
It was a quick retrieval after his rant. Jungkook lets himself be towed out of your apartment by an oddly enthusiastic Taehyung who's going on about a new game trailer he saw online while Jin has offered to be left behind to clean up the mess. It was no doubt obvious, the familiar awkwardness and tenseness brought by a rejected confession lingered in the air when they arrived, it only took him one look at you and he already knew. 
The moment the door slams shut behind the boys, he immediately began:
“Did he admit it?”
His voice was soft yet it rang loudly in the pindrop silence of your living room. The sigh he let out echoed more when you nodded.
“I told him to not do it, you know? But you know how stubborn he gets.”
You didn’t reply. You simply move, walking to the trash bin to put the empty beer cans in and Jin follows close with the bowls stacked on top of each other to place in the sink. It was a brief moment of reprieve. He let the moment from earlier simmer in your stomach, let the smoke from it fill your lungs and weigh your heart till you burst.
Out of the seven boys, you've always turned to either him or Yoongi as they're older than you, so it came to nobody's shock when you break and told him.
“It just never gets better, I always feel guilty even if I didn’t choose. I’m just lucky I didn’t have to suffer through seven of these, I don’t think I could take it and just quit.”
It was a thought you’ve entertained when Taehyung came to you with his heart in his hand, giving it to you carelessly despite knowing how you’ve handled the other confessions. He was all dopey smiles and flushed cheeks, it continued even when you’ve pushed his heart back to him with an apologetic look.
Seeing the happy creases in his eyes iron out despite the huge boxy smile continuing to play on his lips, the existing pressuring guilt reawakened. Taehyung’s heart that gleamed and glowed gold, vulnerable for you to take and use from where it settled in the middle of his offering palms. You could’ve taken advantage of it all as they were rising in fame, when they were facing discrimination from the other companies and had found comfort in you but you didn’t.
Even with the attraction you've felt for them, you were nothing but a makeup artist to the company. Another asset to deploy and replace if it got annoying to handle. You couldn't risk your career on uncertainties, this is your dream job.
You loved them all equally and held them in the same regards as the others, they’re your best friends, chosen soul companions even without the marks to solidify it. 
They loved you and you loved them all but you wouldn't bet your life on an uncertain future.
“You should give us more credit, you know?” 
He says from the kitchen sink, the sound of water slowing into a halt. Seokjin didn’t move for a while. When he did, it was to place down the plates, washing his hands before turning around to face you.
“We’re grown adults now, we can handle rejection so don’t feel too bad about it. You can choose and we’d even help you keep it a secret from everyone besides us eight.”
It was genuine. Even in the haze of your intoxication, those words felt like a cool balm for your aching heart. While Namjoon’s words were cited research, formal and factual and Yoongi’s were calming droughts to ease the discomfort of sadness brought by gloomy thoughts, Seokjin speaks from the heart, true and unbiased but says it with a gentleness and care. 
Guilt sets like a boulder on your heart. Being able to feel, to experience such a privilege when all you've done is break his heart since your hunt for a husband, the weight in your chest multiplied and tears sprung from your eyes.
You wanted them but you couldn't risk your dream job, couldn't risk a friendship as precious as theirs for kisses and hugs that eventually has its ends.
You didn’t even notice it when he crossed the distance between you both and pulled you plush to his chest but you recognized the familiar sensation of plush lips pressing against your forehead.
If it lingered a few seconds past what's platonically allowed, you didn’t mention it.
Seokjin’s muted scent of freshly baked cakes brought silence to the rampaging waves of thoughts in your mind and if you pressed your nose flush to his chest to bury yourself in his fragrance, he didn’t say anything, bringing one hand behind your head protectively.
“I'm sorry to put you through this pain, Jinnie. I-I didn’t know.”
“I knew you didn’t know but I'll be fine... eventually.” He breathes out before leaning down to bury himself into the nest of your hair. "As long as you're happy, then I am too."
It was heavy, being loved and held so preciously even after you’ve turned him down, it felt cruel, sadistic even. But like the selfish woman you are, you accepted it. Soaked in his affections greedily.
“You know, he asked me to never show Guwon around you guys.”
He sighed. “I knew he would.”
“Do you want that as well?
Silence followed but you heard his answer loud and clear.
The second date happened after the first leg of the tour in Seoul.
Although planned suddenly, you appreciated the downtime after being lost in the haze of rushed outfit changes, reapplying makeup, and patting sweat from foreheads. If anything, you were thankful you could loosen up after earlier. The awkward tension didn’t go amiss, it only took Namjoon and Yoongi one look between you and Jungkook before taking charge on how the night progresses.
Yoongi didn't waste any time waving you over to ask for help for his makeup, even when he was already being prepped by one of your older colleagues, Ji hae. Thankfully, the woman lets you take over, saying she wanted a snack anyways.
The man didn't bother asking you what happened and settled comfortably in his chair but not before offering you the snack he bought earlier and was laying neglected on his lap. Yoongi asked about Guwon in a hushed voice, because while you were living in a reverse harem with most of his brothers, he was genuinely curious about your boyfriend-to-be.
Maybe it was the fact he has never admitted his affections for you that made it comfortable to discuss topics you could never talk about with the others with him, but you let your tongue a little loose.
And he listened.
Yoongi has always been a man of action not words, his love language has always been opening water bottles, blankets appearing from nowhere when you're passed out on their couch, and listening attentively. Despite what the world says about his nonchalance and silence, in your eyes, he's the sweetest guy on the roster—not that you'd tell Jimin that of course, he'd riot if he were to find out.
By the end of the concert, Guwon asks you on an impromptu date. A simple late night walk on a market nearby because there's apparently a food fair, and as usual, the expenses are on him. Hungry with a principle of never turning down free food, of course you accepted. 
Though you had a long time deciding whether to go or not with Jungkook’s confession still fresh.
Minutes later, he's waiting for you by the exit. The scene of him leaning on his Mercedes, waiting for you to reach him at the bottom of the stairs looks like it was pulled out of a kdrama.
Oddly enough, they didn’t question your lack of updates in the group chat but Jimin reached out later on and you suspect he told everyone your whereabouts instead, hopefully minus the date part to spare the others (read: Jungkook) from heartbreak.
The fair looked like a mirage of a paradise in the night hidden away in a small gently-lit up alley. The path was lightened up with gentle lanterns hung above you, the warm colors setting a more intimate scene. It wasn’t as luxurious as dinner from yesterday or as calming as the bike ride around the Han river but you appreciated it nonetheless.
You’re ready to drop dead but you pushed through, you wanted this relationship to work. Because then, maybe the monsters—your mother and her wide selection of personalities as well as aunties, her friends, trying to refer you to their horrible sons—haunting you from under your bed will finally leave you alone.
It was cruel that you’re using someone else to erase the memory of being professed to by one of your best friends.
Guwon was happy enough to take charge the whole date, leading you from food stall after food stall, ordering whatever your eyes lingered at which is half of what the fair offers. He understands your lack of responses as it is, tired from work, and talked enough for the both of you. Which you are grateful for.
He talked about his job and what happened that day, willingly telling you about the story of how he and his co-workers clicked back in College, never to part till now in the field they wanted. He spoke of his dreams, how he envisioned his dream home by the province surrounded by nature and the cat named Nabi waiting for him at home.
There's nothing more blatant of a signal than the last part, whether you accept it or not depends on you.
Normally, you would've frowned at the thought, immediately thinking of running away but as the night deepens and stalls start to close, the idea grows more and more tempting despite the logical voice in your head disagreeing. Seeking a distraction and possibly leading on a kind man is cruel, both to him and you.
But at the end of the day, it’s just an escape from the reality you're stuck in, a temporary answer to a long time problem. 
How harmful can it be? 
People had hookups before, you’ve had hookups before your mother has started a hunt for your husband this year so what are you so reluctant for? 
If this man is to be your husband, you should check your physical compatibility right?
You shivered. God, you sounded like one of those shitty guys you’ve dated before.
"Hey, the stalls just closed. Are you fine with me driving you back to your house?"
His voice cuts through your deep thoughts and you turn to him. Even in the dimly lit corner of the alley, Guwon looked attractive as ever with his dimpled smile and laid back attitude, his soft eyes gleaming under the lanterns, affections overflowing from his gaze and you. shuddered from its weight. 
Staring at the man, you wondered if you'd ever fall in love with him as he seemed right now.
Soon enough, you both arrive in front of your apartment building. However, not every plan goes through as you thought it'd go and you find two familiar figures rushing down to meet you. 
Taehyung didn't hesitate to run up to you with open arms and a wide smile. He didn't even care that you both almost toppled over if it wasn't for Guwon hand supporting you from the back.
"Wh-why are you two here? Shouldn't you guys be resting?"
Jimin shrugged but you caught the mischievous glint in his eyes as a small smile tugs his lips. "Hyung got so worried and wanted us to make sure you got home safely."
"Even a thumbs up would be great but you ignored every text and call! Jin hyung panicked and sent us out, if you didn't come home, he would've had a huge manhunt for you." Taehyung chimed in, pulling away but keeping his hands on your shoulders as he stared deep into your eyes, as if trying to hypnotize you into believing them.
Jimin snickered. “Yoongi hyung was an hour away from declaring you missing so the good dongsaengs we are, we decided to camp outside your apartment.”
You would've accepted his explanation, it was logically sound yet the dark glint of mischief and something else in his eyes as his gaze bounced from you to Guwon told you a different story.
They've always had to interrupt your dates when it becomes sour but this was the first time they've confronted a potential partner outside the intentions of ruining a date because you wanted it to suck.
This was them laying their claim over their own, a silent statement. A declaration you try not to think so much about, fearing you'd dig yourself deep and fall to your death.
“These must be one of your kids?” Guwon asks from behind, reminding you of his presence and you turn to him with an apologetic look.
“Yeah, Taehyung and Jimin. I practically raised them.”
Jimin scoffs and your head snapped to him, widening your eyes in warning to which he ignored. “Just because you’re a year older, doesn’t mean you could say you raised us you know?”
“See what I deal with everyday?” 
Guwon laughs lightheartedly before patting your head to get your attention. “Since your kids are here to protect you, I should get going now.”
“Drive safely.”
“See you soon?”
“Definitely.”
Then he placed a haste kiss on the edge of your lips, catching you off guard and you froze. Guwon was already in his car by the time you realized what happened and turned to chastise him. You couldn't even knock on the passenger window when the arms coiled around your shoulders tightened and tugged you close.
Letting Guwon kiss you in front of one of the men who confessed to you once was the first mistake, second was looking up at Taehyung whose hug is starting to hurt.
Gone were the usual giddiness and child-like enthusiasm that would pour from his eyes. It was replaced by a colder glare, almost blank and emotionless as it narrowed behind you and jaw locked tight. There was something primal in the way his hand behind your head was pushing you closer to him as if he was hounding over his game from another predator.
Goosebumps prickled your skin awake.
If butterflies exploded in your stomach and ignited a molten heat in your abdomen at that very moment, it's a secret you’d take to your grave.
“Tae?”
“Noona, I think we should head inside. It's getting cold.” Jimin’s sweet voice sounded forced and you resisted the urge to look at him.
While their reaction to being challenged is obvious, you couldn't, for the life of you, figure out why he should feel like that when he’s been seeing other people since his confession. From your past dates where he attended as one of your escape plans, he’s  never expressed such an intense show of displeasure so you thought his fleeting crush had passed.
Until tonight.
When Taehyung pulled away, the traces of his hostility were gone and you had to double take at how vastly different he's appearing now. He has his lower lip pushed out into a pout, eyes wide with mirth as he reaches up to cup your cheeks, his warm palms heating your cold-nipped skin.
“Aigoo, you're so cold noona. Let's go in and binge that foreign show you've been following.”
With hands now intertwined, he leads you inside the building where Jimin was already standing inside and was holding the door open for you both. You were being tugged into your own home yet you couldn’t help but feel tense as Taehyung and Jimin welcomed you back in with the same dark look you saw earlier.
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jlheon · 5 months ago
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à­šà­§ ─── đ’Ÿ đ“đ˜°đ˜·đ˜Š đ“Žđ˜°đ˜¶ . . . . 𝗅𝗁𝗌
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ăƒ»â„ăƒ» ─── 𝓱𝗬𝗡. heeseung realizes he’s only ever loved you
đ’»đ—†đ—‹ êŁ‘à­§ đ“«est friends to lovers ; fluff 𝔀ordcount ( 600 ) đ“čeng's note. i miss seung đ“«ookshelf
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the blaring noise of your front door being knocked on and the frantic rings of your doorbell wake you up.
you groan, picking up your phone to check the time and covering your eyes for a moment from the initial shock of the brightness emitting off your screen.
catching a glimpse of a myriad of notifications from your best friend and his signature knocking patterns, though right now more frantic, you get up.
“what the hell do you want from me?” you sigh, rubbing your eyes as heeseung’s figure stands in the hallway.
“sorry for waking you,” he quickly apologizes, letting himself in and removing his shoes.
his disheveled appearance is a telltale sign that he ran all the way to your apartment. even though to your knowledge, his car is completely fine and running— or maybe his impatient ass ran up the seven flights of stairs instead of taking the elevator.
you honestly couldn’t care any less about what lee heeseung had to say that made him wake you both up at this hour in the night. so you tried to stumble back into your bedroom, navigating your dim apartment.
“hey! i came here for a reason!” heeseung calls after you, switching on the light.
“can we talk tomorrow?” you whine, covering your eyes with your hands, “i’m so tired, hee.”
“i know,” heeseung wraps his arms around your shoulders, “but this really can’t wait.”
“seriously?”
“seriously.”
yawning in defeat, you let heeseung guide the both of you towards your ajar bedroom door. he closes the door behind him as you sleepily situate yourself on your bed, back resting against your wooden headboard.
“talk,” you say as he sits adjacent to you.
heeseung looks everywhere but your eyes. his leg slightly bouncing which shakes the whole bed. his hands picking at the tag on one of your stray pillows.
the last time you’ve seen him this nervous he was opening his university decision letters.
“____,” he stammers, reaching out for your hand.
“did something bad happen?” you panic, giving your hand to him, “are you moving
?”
“no,” heeseung shakes his head, “um
”
you stare at his fidgeting body as you try to think of what could possibly be at the tip of his tongue.
“there’s no better way to say this,” heeseung sighs, squeezing your hand in his, “i love you.”
“you what,” you whisper, retracting your hand.
“i know, i’m sorry,” he says weakly, “i know this is sudden and probably the last thing you want to hear, but i really do love you. if you don’t love me back i understand and you can kick me out. we pretend this never happened of course, but please don’t ghost me. i can live with the fact you don’t love me but i can’t live without you in my life.”
“you love me?” you question again in disbelief, bringing your knees to your chest.
“how can i not?” heeseung chuckles in defeat, “you’re perfect.”
“shut up,” you bury your head in your knees.
“i can’t,” he smiles, “i love you. if you give me just one chance to prove it to you i will.”
“you really came all the way to tell me?” you whisper, picking at the skin around your nails.
“i’ve been meaning to for years,” he says sheepishly, “i realized i’ve loved you for all my life but never realized it wasn’t just platonic. i hate when you go on dates and when you have other guy friends. i hate that you let other men taint your self-worth, you’re truly the most deserving and lovable person i know.”
tears brim your eyes as you watch your best friend of over a decade ramble on about how much he loves you. the way his eyes bore into yours as they remain full of love.
you reach out for him and wrap him in a tight hug as your arms fling around his neck, “lee heeseung, i love you too.”
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vanishingstarrs · 7 months ago
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twenty something ( k. bakugo x reader, established relationship, just soft and pure vibes, down bad bakugo ) ( it was my bday on friday and i wanted to write something short and sweet, self indulgent for sure )
You didn’t care for birthdays.
You had never made a huge fuss over your own, anyway.
The last birthday party you remember having was back when you were still obsessed with fairy princesses and only spoke in broken sentences, likely only five.
Since then, it had really only ever been small dinners and hardly any presents. Your family never really had the means to do anything huge and you told yourself you never minded, that all you ever cared for was the acknowledgment of the day. And that was never skipped or glanced over, there was never a lack of love and you always felt grateful for another year.
It was true, you did feel that way and after the war those feelings only grew. You were more appreciative than ever, even more so for all the new friends and loved ones in your life.
Your boyfriend, Katsuki, especially.
And though you weren’t expecting anything, your boyfriend had other ideas. He’d come over the night before to make you dinner and give you a few gifts he’d gotten you. You swooned over his attention to detail, he cooked your favorite meal and got you things he knew you’d love.
“Katsuki
”
“I know.” He sighed,“You might not wanna accept it, I know how you are, you think it’s too much, but I’m not returning it.”
He stood up, walking behind you and pulling the intricately detailed locket from the box you had just opened, he unclasped it and moved your hair aside to secure it onto your neck,“Open it.”
You listened, opening the locket and feeling your heart swell.
Your boyfriend had not only gone through the trouble to get both your initials engraved on the back of the necklace, but he’d already gone ahead and selected two of your favorite pictures. One was just your favorite photo of him and the second was one of you two together from the first date you’d gone on together. It’d taken you so long to convince him to take that picture with you and as a result was now one of your favorites.
“Thank you, my love.” You looked up and kissed his cheek,“I love it very much.”
“Just thought you should have something, just in case
”
You gave him a look,“We don’t think like that, love, but I appreciate the sentiment you were going for and I’ll cherish it, thank you.”
“You’re welcome, baby.” He gave you a small smile,“Alright, you can open the rest, this was the only major one, don’t worry.”
You smiled and shared another kiss before proceeding to go through the rest of the gifts he’d gotten you. You worked in the hospital and he’d gotten a few things that would be useful; a few cute pens, a new pair of comfy shoes you’d been wanting to try out since your feet were always killing you, and a brand new water bottle (your last one got crushed after you accidentally ran it over with your car) and with it he’d also gotten tons of adorable stickers to decorate it.
You smiled big when you pulled a Hello Kitty plush out of the next bag and he rolled his eyes like he hadn’t been the one to purchase it.
“Don’t think I’m feeding your addiction to that weird ass cat.” He scoffed,“Just thought this one was actually kind of cool.”
Cool was an understatement.
Hello Kitty was known for lots of collabs with many of your favorite shows and characters, but this one? This plush was dressed in your boyfriend’s hero costume and the tag on it had his hero agency’s name on it so it was definitely official and not just some knock off.
“Didn’t even know they made these.” He explained,“Don’t remember approving that shit.”
You blushed,“I might’ve seen the papers on your desk one day and signed for you
”
“What?!” He stood up, shocked.
You shrugged,“I didn’t know they were actually going to go through with it, Sanrio teases lots of collabs so when I never saw it in stores I just guessed they went a different route.”
“When were you even in my office?” He asked, curious instead of upset.
“About a month ago, baby, remember? You were asked to patrol last minute because Eijiro’s wife went into labor and we had planned to have lunch together so I ended up dropping off food just in case you got a chance to stop and eat. I think your assistant, what’s his name, dropped off the papers and since I saw the logo on it
 and well, I couldn’t help peeking.” You told him the story, feeling slightly guilty.
He rolled his eyes,“You’re lucky I don’t give a shit about that kinda stuff, otherwise I’d—”
You gasped suddenly,“Oh. My. God! Baby, what if they ask you to do a photo shoot with Hello Kitty, herself?! Wouldn’t that be amazing?”
Your boyfriend couldn’t help chuckle at your excitement,“I suppose it would be, a little bit, and I promise if that happens you’ll be on set with me that day, don’t worry.”
“Thank you, sweetie.” You gave him a big kiss and he handed you one final bag.
“Last one.” He said.
You rose an eyebrow at him as you peeked inside,“A dress? Do we have an occasion?”
“Only the best day of the year.” Katsuki took your hand and pulled you up to give you a hug,“I wanted to celebrate with you today because I’m a selfish bastard and I like having you to myself.” You felt him check his watch,“It’s officially midnight and officially your birthday.”
He pulled away slightly, holding your waist with one arm and placing his other hand on your cheek, making you immediately lean into the warmth of his touch. The kiss he gave you was gentle and full of so much love, you already knew this was your favorite of all birthdays just for the fact that you were spending it with him.
You opened your eyes and his gaze gave you butterflies, you felt like you did on your first date.
“Happy birthday, my love.”
“Thank you, Katsuki.” Your cheeks were starting to hurt from smiling so much.
“And I lied.” He said,“I do have one more thing for you, but it won’t be until later. We’ll sleep soon, and I’ll have a few more things to take care of before it, but I’d like you to take my card—”
“Baby, no
” You began to deny, he’d already gotten you enough.
“Yes.” He insisted,“You have a dress, all you need to do is find some accessories. Get some shoes, buy a new purse, hell buy yourself the whole store, baby, go fucking crazy. I’m asking nicely, and I’ll make sure you get something, trust me. And I want you ready by three, got it?”
You knew arguing with your boyfriend was pointless, that was one bad thing about the both of you, you were equally stubborn and fighting only ended when you got tired of it.
“Fine.” You relented.
True to his word, you went to bed soon after the gifts. Your boyfriend brought an overnight bag and you were happy to have him hold you in bed. When you woke up, however, his side of the bed was empty and in its place lay a birthday card.
You picked it up, smiling at the design he’d gone with and pictured him standing in front of the display for a long time before deciding. You opened it and out fell your boyfriend’s credit card, you rolled your eyes and set it aside to read the contents of the note.
Happy birthday, my pretty girl. I know you’re new to celebrating, but I plan to change that soon. You deserve the world and more, I’ll do my best to make sure you get it.
P.S. Please enjoy this breakfast (see nightstand) and be dressed by 9. Mina will be stopping by to ensure you shop for all your needs.
P.P.S. I love you.
You quickly turned and found the aforementioned breakfast, a cup of hot coffee, and a beautiful bouquet of tulips decorated your nightstand. You smiled and snapped a photo, sending it to your boyfriend along with a thank you.
He must’ve just left to take care of whatever he was planning.
You tried not to think about it or your nerves and overthinking would definitely kick in. You ate your food and sipped your coffee in bed while checking and responding to any birthday messages, picking up immediately when you saw your parents calling. You almost teared up when they started singing happy birthday and laughed along with them, asking if you’ll see them later in the week for your annual dinner. They agreed and you finished the call with ‘I love you’s’.
By the time nine rolled around, you were ready and right on time was Mina’s knocking on your door. You opened it and got greeted with a hug.
“I heard free shopping trip and here I am!” She cheered,“Ready to do some damage?”
“Not quite.” You blushed,“What do you know about his plans?”
She shrugged,“Sworn to secrecy, dude, sorry.”
You scoffed and laughed as you said,“Whatever happened to chicks before dicks?”
You’d met Mina as a result of dating Katsuki and ever since then you’d hit it off with her as much as you had your boyfriend, you never really had too many close girlfriends and she was a very welcome surprise into your life.
“Doing this for my chick.” She elbowed you teasingly,“So grab ya bag, girl, we have places to be and money to spend!”
You listened, grabbing your purse and reluctantly taking your boyfriend’s card as per his request.
It didn’t take long for Mina to decide which stores you should head into. It did, however, take more than a few for you to actually want to buy anything. It wasn’t that you didn’t see things you liked, but it was hard for you to accept your boyfriend was paying for you.
You’d been brought up to be independent and though you knew the importance of being taken care of, it was hard not being the giver for once.
A pair of shoes eventually caught your eye and Mina caught on quick, calling over an associate with a mischievous smile,“My friend would love to see these in a size seven, please.”
“Right away, miss.”
The woman left to find them and you sighed,“I don’t know, Mina.”
“Girl, please, your man literally is begging you to spend some of his money and you’re hesitating? These shoes are to die for and he explicitly stated you should get some to match your dress. We already got a few cute pieces of jewelry, I think these would match perfectly to those.”
In the end, Mina convinced you. Or the saleswoman did, when she revealed the shoes you were trying on would actually go on sale next week and that she’d be happy to adjust the price for your special occasion.
For once, you’d been happy to reveal it was your birthday and you walked away even happier with your bargain made.
“That was so nice of her.” You beamed as you followed Mina around a purse store she liked.
You definitely didn’t need one of those, but your eyes wandered aimlessly to pass the time.
“Mhm.” She agreed before holding up a bag,“And how hot is this bag?! C’mon, Bakugo would want you to have this.”
You regretted turning around as you actually really liked the one she’d been trying to show you,“Nope, got a bag, but thanks.”
“And you have shoes and jewelry, babe, the whole point of this trip was to treat yourself.” Your friend countered. She was right and you hated it.
You sighed,“I know, but I bought stuff already
”
“A few inexpensive sterling silver rings off that lady’s booth outside and a pair of shoes marked way down from the original price, this would be an actual treat.”
“Yes, but
 I mean he already got me this nice necklace and the dress and all the other little things, plus he’s planning who knows what, I don’t think I need a new purse, mine may not be designer but it’s held up and it’ll be fine for a while longer.” You explained.
“He has the means to,” Mina walked up to you and pulled your current bag off your shoulder to replace with the one she was trying to convince you on,“Plus no one ever needs a new purse, it’s a want and it’s okay to have those, you know.”
You remembered the birthday card. You deserve the world and more

Looking at yourself in the mirror, you sighed. Mina walked up behind you and wrapped her arms around you, smiling and raising her eyebrows,“So
? Whatcha gonna do?”
She drove a hard bargain.
“You need to consider you might be in the wrong field.” You pushed her playfully as she looped her arm through yours and led the way to the cash register. Your heart might have actually broken while swiping your boyfriend’s card across and your fingers were definitely shaking as you typed in the pin for it.
You knew your boyfriend received alerts for any purchases, especially big ones, and you were just about ready to turn back around when you heard your phone ping, assuming the worst. He had to be pissed at that one.
k (à„ƒ à„*`ωŽ)à„: Glad to see Mina’s doing her job, don’t you dare feel guilty. You deserve this and more. 🧡
You looked up to find Mina glancing at you and smiling,“Told ya.”
The last purchase you made was with your own money as you’d run out of your favorite blush and needed to replace it. You enjoyed lunch with your friend and she drove you back home where she proceeded to stake claim on your bedroom floor to get herself ready with you.
“You’re really not gonna tell me?” You asked your friend as you applied a light layer of foundation.
“I’m sure you could guess
” Mina shrugged as she curled her eyelashes,“But I really can’t say, all he told me was to take you shopping and keep you busy until three. He’s having a car pick us up.”
“You don’t even know?!” You turned around, shock written all over your face.
Mina snorted,“No, I’m trolling you, I totally know.”
“Ugh.”
You got ready in silence, save for some music Mina decided to play from a small portable speaker she brought with her.
Once the clock hit three, you were officially an anxious wreck. Your phone pinged.
k (à„ƒ à„*`ωŽ)à„: Your carriage awaits.
You made sure Mina was ready and that you weren’t forgetting anything before heading out, finding your “carriage” was your boyfriend’s car and he stood by the passenger door, holding the door open for you with a lazy smile. He was wearing nice clothes too and your eyes stuck to him like glue,“Wow.”
“Wow yourself.” He gave you a quick kiss, careful not to smudge your lipstick.
Mina fake gagged,“You two are disgusting.”
“Shut up and get in.” Katsuki told her before turning back to you, eyes soft,“You ready?”
You released a deep breath,“I guess so
 I mean what am I even ready for?”
He smiled,“Don’t stress, just go with it. You’re about to find out anyway.”
It was hard not to, and you were sure your palms were sweating more than his as Katsuki always held your hand while driving.
You were quick to recognize the drive back to his house and relaxed a little bit, deciding he was right. Enough was enough, why not just go with it? You had amazing friends and an even better boyfriend, you deserved to get treated nicely. And he would never plan anything you weren’t ready for or wouldn’t like, as proven by the night before and the morning of shopping.
You didn’t see any cars or anything parked outside his house and you narrowed your eyes at him,“What’s going on? Seriously.”
He said nothing as he got out and opened your door for you, extending a hand out and helping you out of the car in your fancy new clothes and accessories. “Close your eyes.”
“For?”
“Please.”
Mina nudged you from behind and you obliged quickly.
He held your hand and led you with one hand on your lower back as you dutifully kept your eyes closed, you heard the jingling of keys and figured Mina must be unlocking the door for you.
“Watch your step.” Katsuki warned you and you felt him help you regardless as you stepped into his house.
Not one second of warning was given before it happened.
“Surprise!”
You opened your eyes immediately, hands going up to your mouth as you found your entire group of friends in your boyfriend’s living room, wearing party hats and blowing noisemakers. Streamers and balloons littered the room and a cake with your name on it sat on a designated dessert table. You almost cried when you spotted your parents and two brothers in one section.
“Happy birthday, baby.” Katsuki whispered in your ear before you were tackled by your family first, then your friends, and even some of your work family had shown up to wish you another happy year.
You felt a little overwhelmed at first, but slowly you relaxed. It hit you how happy you were, how much joy had been brought on by everything your boyfriend had done. You hadn’t experienced this type of celebration in a long time and it was nice to be seen by those who you held dear. Your boyfriend hardly left your side as you spoke and got around to saying hi to everyone. “Don’t let him go.” Your mother even whispered into your hair as she hugged you tight and gave you kisses,“Good ones are hard to come by.”
“He’s the best.” You agreed with a huge smile.
You eventually split up as you spoke with a few of your friends and even some of his, happy to catch up with Kirishima’s wife.
You held her son and spouted baby nonsense to him as she spoke your ear off about how her husband and Katsuki had been thick as thieves planning the day months in advance, and how she’d even been roped into calling people and checking on their availability. You thanked her for being part of it and looked up to where the two men now stood away, somehow still looking mischievous. You didn’t doubt they might even already be planning the next thing.
The night went by in the blink of an eye.
You saw friends you hadn’t seen in a while, learned the hard truth of standing awkwardly in front of a cake while everyone sang happy birthday to you, ate amazing food and cake, had a couple drinks, and lastly opened a few more gifts from those who had brought one. (You may or may not have received a few more Dynamite x Hello Kitty collab items).
Katsuki held you from behind as you watched your and his friends mingle together,“Did I do a good job?”
“I don’t know how I’ll top it for yours.” You said back, turning around in his arms, placing yours around his neck,“You did amazingly, I never thought I would have this one day.”
“For the rest of your life, I promise you will.”
You didn’t know why, but it felt much heavier when he said that. Like he wasn’t just promising you a lifetime of birthday parties, but like he was promising something else. You thought back to the way he smirked at you across the room when you saw him talking to Kirishima and your heart skipped again. There was no way. You’d only been together for a little over a year

And yet

Nah.
You pushed those thoughts away and allowed yourself to be happy in the now.
In his arms.
You kissed him,“I love you.”
You really couldn’t have asked for a better day, surrounded by the people who loved you— or for a better boyfriend, who made you feel seen in both little and big ways. Who went out of his way to ensure you were always happy and loved. You might just have a new favorite day of the year and it was all thanks to him.
“Happy birthday, gorgeous.”
Yup, you officially loved birthdays.
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lecsainz · 1 year ago
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Hi can you please do one about the Travis and Taylor rumours going around. Maybe like your Taylor’s sister dating Travis secretly for awhile now and your pregnant. And like the Taylor concert he went to he was like there with you and the football that Taylor went to she was like there with you. And it all comes out that he’s with you and not Taylor and they find out your pregnant and all and are so shocked and didn’t see it coming. Like if that makes sense 🙂
EVERYONE WAS WRONG
parings: travis kelce + swift!reader
author đŸ—’ïžâ€™s: I missed writing smau 😭
summary: where you are taylor swift sister and there’s something with travis but everyone thinks he and taylor are dating.
✩. . . masterlist !
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liked by selenagomez, icespice and 1.989.073 others
ynswift can I say I'm cheating on the eagles?
tag: @/taylorswift @/chiefs
see all 65.638 comments
taylorswift still can't believe you made me come to this game
‷ ynswift didn't force you at all!
user6 love seeing the swift sisters together
killatrav It was nice meeting you, y/n
‷ ynswift likewise, kelce
‷ killatrav hope to see you girls at the next game
‷ ynswift I need to check my schedule
user1 y/n being the cupid of tayvis
user Is it confirmed that taylor and travis are together???
‷ user4 I think so
user2 she it's me in life: the friend who always couples people up
user5 andrea, please adopt me to be their sister!
‷ ynswift mom said she'd adopt!
‷ user5 OH MY GOD
philadelphiaeagles no comments
‷ ynswift I swear we still loyal to your team
user7 I want a tayvis photo, make it happen y/n!
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Y/N and Travis had met during a The Eras concert, what seemed like a normal show turned into something entirely different. Y/N didn't expect it until she literally ran into this 6'5'' tall man. He was so much taller than her that she couldn't help but feel incredibly drawn to the unknown man, so much so that she forgot how to speak when he asked if she was okay.
Travis found the blonde girl utterly charming and just had to ask for her number. However, instead of getting her number, he received a polite but firm "no." That piqued the curiosity of the Kansas City Chiefs' tight end. With determination, he approached one of the security guards to inquire about the mysterious blonde girl. After a bit of investigating, he finally discovered that she was Y/N Swift, the younger sister of the famous Taylor Swift.
Travis couldn't help but be intrigued by this revelation. He felt compelled to get to know Y/N better, despite the initial rejection. It took him over a week to gather the courage to send her a direct message. When he did, he invited her to an Eagles game, which he later learned was the Swift family's favorite team, and having her older brother on the team made it easier to secure a private suite for their date.
As the two of them spent more time together, a genuine connection began to form. Y/N was captivated by Travis's charisma and his down-to-earth personality, something she hadn't experienced with anyone in a long time. Travis, on the other hand, was smitten with Y/N's intelligence, warmth, and her unique ability to make him forget about the pressures of the football field.
One date led to another, and before they knew it, they were deeply involved in a relationship that neither had anticipated. Their connection was electric, and they couldn't get enough of each other's company.
As the days turned into weeks and then into months, Y/N and Travis's bond grew stronger. They had shared dreams, inside jokes, and an unspoken understanding that went beyond the public eye. But their connection was shrouded in secrecy, as Y/N didn't want to overshadow her sister's fame and success.
Despite their efforts to keep things private, the media eventually caught wind of their relationship. Reports began to circulate, with speculations of a romance between Travis and Taylor Swift, not Y/N. The rumors hurt Y/N, as it seemed like her own life would always be overshadowed by her sister's immense fame.
Little did she know that amidst the media frenzy and the complications of their secret relationship, she would find herself facing an unexpected twist of fate – she was pregnant with Travis's child.
As days turned into weeks, Y/N couldn't keep the secret any longer. She knew she needed to tell Travis about the life-changing news, despite the fear and uncertainty that loomed over her. She had never been in a situation like this before.
One evening, she decided it was time to confide in Travis. With her heart pounding, she went to his house, her mind filled with thoughts of how he might react. Would he be overwhelmed? Would he want to be a part of this?
Travis opened the door and smiled warmly at her, inviting her in. Y/N took a deep breath and began, "Travis, there's something I need to talk to you about, something important."
Travis's expression shifted from curiosity to concern. "What's going on, Y/N? You look serious."
Y/N took a deep breath and began, "Travis, there's something I need to tell you. It's not easy, and we didn't plan for this, but..." She paused, her eyes glistening with emotion, "I'm pregnant."
For a few seconds, there was silence. Travis processed the information, and his eyes filled with a mix of emotions, but he didn't look away from Y/N. Then, a gentle smile crossed his face. "Y/N, are you serious? We're going to be parents?"
Y/N nodded with a soft smile. "Yes, Travis. I'm pregnant."
Travis leaned in closer, his face filled with emotion. "That's incredible! I can't believe it. I'm going to be a dad."
Tears welled up in Y/N's eyes as she saw his genuine excitement. "I'm so glad you're happy, Travis. I was worried about how you'd react."
Travis took her hands in his and looked deeply into her eyes. "Y/N, I couldn't be happier. This is a beautiful surprise, and I'm looking forward to this journey with you. We'll figure everything out together."
Y/N felt a wave of relief wash over her. She couldn't believe how supportive Travis was being. "Travis, you have no idea how much this means to me. I was so afraid to tell you."
Travis took her hand and said, "Y/N, I care about you more than I can express. In fact, there's something I've been wanting to ask you for a while now." He got down on one knee, pulling a small box from his pocket. "Will you do me the honor of becoming my girlfriend?"
Y/N's eyes welled up with tears of joy as she nodded and replied, "Yes, Travis, a thousand times, yes."
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liked by taylorswift, annehathaway and 23.366.133 others ynswift & killatrav you said I do and I did too
comments have been limited
taylorswift so happy for you both đŸ€ and travis you better take good care of my little sister!
austinkingsleyswift congrats sis!
jason.kelce finally, you guys announced it! I couldn't stand not being able to talk about it anymore. congratulations lovebirds!
chiefs welcome to chiefs family y/n!
donnakelce I'm so happy to have you in the family now y/n! 💕
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1K notes · View notes
zumistew · 10 months ago
Text
holding their hand
Tokyo revengers boys holding your hand for the first time Pt.2
Includes: Kakucho, Hanma, Ran, Rindou
tags: fluff, flirting, confession, protectiveness??
A/N: I didn’t expect my first story to get many likes so thank you for everyone who interacted ♡♡♡
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Kakucho
Kakucho is always kind to you constantly providing you with nice gestures, so when he invited you to get some coffee you didn’t think anything of it.
Since it was nearing Valentine’s Day, the coffee shop had a discount for couples. Kakucho asked if you wanted to put on an act for some discounted food, and of course you agreed because who doesn’t like free food.
The waiter came to the table complementing you with a smile “your girlfriend is extremely beautiful.” “I know she is” he says with a sweet yet cocky smile on his face. You decide to ignore it telling the waiter thankyou and flashing Kakucho a smile because maybe it was just to keep the act up.
After paying the check Kakucho gets up from his side of the booth walking over to your side holding his hand out, you take his hand as he helps you out the booth. “Wow your really putting your all into this act” You say as yall walk out of the shop hand in hand. “It’s not an act stupid” he responds with a slight smile as he opens the shop door for you to exit. “What” you respond as you exit the shop. “I said it’s not an act Y/N” he says before he grabs you by the waist to move you to the side of the sidewalk opposite from the cars.
Hanma
Hanma was a wild card and everyone knew it. He was constantly taunting you and mocking you any chance he got. It was so much to the point that you couldn’t tell when he was being serious or joking.
Although he was crazy you could see he had a heart making himself vulnerable sometimes, you don’t even think he was aware when he was even exposing his true self sometimes.
As you two were walking you end up tripping over your shoes causing you to stumble. “Next time I’ll push you down myself” he say’s chuckling as he looks down at you. “If you push me you’ll regret it
trust me” you say jokingly knowing in the event that he actually pushed you that you would be defenseless.
He shoves you jokingly “now do something” he says smiling.
As you go to shove him back he grabs your wrist while smiling down at you. “Your weak” he says laughing as you give him a slight pout. “You’re not as funny as you think you are” you say with furrowed brows. “You know you enjoy my antics” he says moving his grip down from your wrist to your hand relaxing it in the middle of the two of y’all. “I don’t” you reply monotone but it was obvious you weren’t mad.
Ran
Ran was a lady’s man nobody could deny that. So you never took it seriously whenever he tried to flirt or compliment you.
But this time you were a little unsure. Here he was giving you a bag with a gift. “Open it” he says nonchalantly holding it out for you to grab. “Huh, what’s this?” you ask grabbing it from him taking out the crinkle paper inside. “Thought of you when I saw it” he says with a small smile as his low eyes look down at you with anticipation for your reaction.
You pull out a pearl necklace and a bracelet with the initial “R” dangling from it. “It’s very pretty” you say staring at it with admiration “but I think you left a bracelet for someone else in here stupid” you say thinking he was trying to buy gifts for multiple girls at once. “No I didn’t, it’s yours stupid* he says monotone looking at you with slight amusement. “I’m not stupid, my name doesn’t start with R, you messed up” you say smirking thinking you caught him holding the jewelry out for him to grab. “I know your name doesn’t start with R it’s because mine does” he says taking the jewelry, grabbing your wrist clipping the piece of delicate jewelry onto your wrist.
“Why did you get me this
don’t get me wrong I’m appreciative but why” you say looking up at him as he focuses on the jewelry he’s putting on your wrist. “Because you’re mine Y/N and I want everyone to know it” He smiles at you cockily after he finishes putting the jewelry on your wrist. You look at him a little surprised and suspicious. “Do you have an issue with that” he ask smirking down at you. “No
thanks for the jewelry it’s pretty, I like it” you say with a shy smile. “I know
pretty just like you” he says grabbing your hand.
Rindou
Rindou was your boy best friend. You two had the same humor and often laughed a lot with each other. And you two were now walking home from school together.
As you were walking home from school you looked down at your shoes to notice there untied. “Ugh my shoes keep coming untied” you groan starting to bend down. “Stop” he says lightly grabbing your arm lightly pulling you up. “Let me do it” he says smiling at you as he gets down on one knee. “Put your foot up Y/N” he says patting his thigh. “Oh ok” you say putting your foot on his thigh.
He starts focusing on tying your shoe for you. “You know I could tie it myself” you say looking down at him. “I know but I can’t let you tie your own shoes” he says taking your foot off his thigh as he finishes tying it.
You look at him confused as he stands up. “Why?” You ask him confused. “Because that’s not very gentlemanly” he says smirking at you. “If you say so” you shrug as you continue to walk.
He stops walking and you notice, so you turn around to see why he stopped. “You know Y/N, you’d never have to do anything for yourself if you were with me” he say hands in pockets. “Huh? What are you talking about” you say walking towards him.
“I’m saying that you would never have to lift a finger if you were with me” he says smirking grabbing your hand pulling you closer to him to get his point across. “Are you going to take me up on my offer” he say smirking looking over at you as he continues walking still holding your hand.
Part 1 down here ⇩
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heizlut · 10 months ago
Text
Me & The Devil
*an alternative (and more toxic) version of the original
TW: dark content, heavy manipulation, twisted behavior, gaslighting, somnophilia, dacryphilia, proceed with caution
tags: switch yandere fem!reader, yandere dom!dottore, mostly proofread sry for any mistakes
word count: 4.5k
nsfw under the cut
a/n: this is an alternative version of the original which means some things are the same but with new additions and a different ending. both versions are equally fucked up.
check out my masterlist here!
ê’·ê’Šê’·ê’·ê’Šê’Šê’·ê’Šê’·ê’·ê’·ê’Šê’·ê’·ê’Šê’Šê’·ê’Šê’·ê’·ê’·
Who would have thought that you would be the one to bring Dottore to his knees? He would do anything and everything for you. No one can recall just when you managed to get him wrapped around your finger. You both were the objects of each other’s depraved desires whether either of you knew each other’s intentions from the start or not. It’s hard to believe that anyone could match up to Dottore’s level of twisted manipulation, but you did, deliciously so.
—
You were always such a curious akademiya student; always off on your own and researching whatever you pleased. Your curiosity for the forbidden was becoming quite the talk at the akademiya. Your interest piqued when you found left over research notes from a previous student named Zandik. After asking around and getting strange looks from others, you were about to give up on your search for the man. You bumped into something hard causing you to drop the notes and files you had found and you land hard on your ass. When you looked up, you saw a tall man with blue hair wearing a mask that hid his features. You were immediately entranced by his mysterious aura.
He didn’t think much of you at first until he saw what had scattered on the ground. With a smirk, he held out his hand to you, “I apologize. I must not have been paying attention to where I was going.” You felt your heart race as your thoughts began to twist. You grabbed his hand, pretending to wince as though the pain from your fall was bit much to bear, “I should be the one to apologize. I’m the one who ran into you.” The man laughed it off and bent down to help you gather your papers to which you tried to quickly hide what they contained.
Your reaction made him raise an eyebrow under his mask, “What’s this? Do you have something to hide, little one?” You felt your face heat up at the accusation and the nickname. It felt like he could see right through you, but oh did it send delicious tingles right up your spine, “N-no.. It’s just-“ You sighed as you gathered your thoughts. “If you’d like, we could go somewhere else if you’d like to tell me about it?”, he offered with a smile that you couldn’t quite decipher. You nodded and gave a small smile in return setting your own plans in motion, “It would be nice to have someone to share this with. Thank you.”
You learned that the man was named Dottore. He listened to everything you explained with just a sly smirk on his face. The mask he wore made it hard for you to decipher his true feelings, but the fact that he had sat there and listened with some sort of intrigue to what you were saying made you feel like you were finally understood. He made no move to berate you for what you chose to have an interest in.
Little did you know that the files and notes you had found were all from him and his previous research from before he was expelled from the akademiya and changed his name. He was more than happy to entertain your curiosity. Initially, it shocked you when he offered his hand to you for the second time that day and asked if you would like to pursue your curiosities further with him as your mentor. Your shock morphed into secret satisfaction when you realized that you were getting the chance to act on your twisting thoughts. You gave him an innocent smile as you took his hand. That’s where it all began.
—
At first, Dottore kept some distance from you. You didn’t like that he did this. You wanted to be desired by him in the same way that you desired him. Little by little he began to cut you off from the rest of the world without you paying it any mind. It started with him offering for you to stay one night since it had gotten late and you had carefully feigned your worry about going home alone in the dark. You held back your giddy feelings and graciously accepted to stay.
Soon it became a habit to stay with him after long days of researching and experimenting together. You had your own sleeping quarters, which you had found to be a disappointment, but you knew you could turn this in your favor. Dottore was good at hiding his true intentions and the dark things he was doing without your knowledge. He was so careful to show you only what he wanted you to see. But he didn’t know you had been doing the very same since the moment you laid eyes on him.
Next, he made an offhand comment about you just dropping out of the akademiya and studying under him full time. He had only said it when you came to his place after yet another tough day at the akademiya. You had walked in with a dark and tired look in your eyes, dropping your heavy bag to the ground with a loud thud. Dottore tilted his head slightly at your demeanor, “Would you like to share what’s going on in that pretty little head of yours?” His words felt like it had lit you on fire from the inside. You wanted to take what was just your typical tough day of study and craft your words in such a way that would keep you even closer to him.
You walked up to the table between the two of you and let out a dramatic sigh. You leaned forward, your elbows propped up on the table and your hand resting under your chin. You made sure to arch your back just enough to give off the appeal you wanted to portray and looked up at him innocently through your lashes. From there, you began to go on and on about how you wish you could fully pursue your true interests without interference. He listened to you intently; his eyes travelled subtly across your features, drinking them in. As soon as you finished, he told you to simply drop out and he would take care of you. You took a moment to realize your plan had worked and looked at him with such admiration when he made his suggestion. Your silence made him want to comfort you, so with his own carefully crafted words he smiled, “It’s all up to you. But just know
 You’ll never reach your true potential if you’re trapped under the akademiya’s thumb.” You acted as though you were mulling over his words when in reality your fantasies were running rampant in your mind.
“I can give you everything you need. All you need to do is say the word.”, is what he said as he watched the gears turn in your head. You looked up at him in such a way that made his heart skip, “I’ll drop out. Just promise me that you’ll help me pursue what I want.” To anyone else, it would have seemed as though you meant that you wanted to pursue your true interests in your research, but in truth, your strongest pursuit was him.
The smile on his face grew as he made his promise to you. If you could see the look in his eyes without the mask obscuring your view, you would have noticed that his smile held insanity and obsession. He wanted you all to himself and he was finally getting closer to what he wanted. So were you.
—
Days turned to weeks, which turned to months. You and Dottore had each other so caught up in one's web of manipulation. Both of you were none the wiser of what the other was doing. You acted as though you were dependent on him, letting him cut you off from the world. When was the last time you had been outside with the sun warming your skin? You laugh at the thought. Why would you care when you had everything you wanted right here? You would do literally anything to have Dottore all to yourself. You both kept each other close as he helped you get further along with your research. He gave you everything you wanted, no questions asked. He was oh so good to you. He never even asked for anything in return, to your own dismay...
It actually bothered you. Why wouldn't he ask anything of you? He could demand you to get on your knees for him and choke on his cock in return for what he's done for you and you'd do it happily. But he never did... You began to hint that you would like to return his many favors, but Dottore would just brush you off with a laugh and a smile saying that seeing you happy with what you were accomplishing together was more than enough. You felt conflicted at the words. They were sweet which must mean he felt something for you right? But you were also conflicted because you wanted him to just take what he wanted from you. One thing you failed to notice as the way his gaze on you would change when your back was turned from him. The way it travelled down your body, taking in every inch and curve, committing it to memory... It was dark and hungry...
You formulated a sly little plan in hopes of getting his attention. You reached up to grab a new test tube from a shelf that was just out of your reach. Making sure the little skirt you wore rose up to expose a bit of the roundness of your ass. Your breath hitched with excitement when you felt a hand touch your waist. A hard chest pressed up against your back. Hot breath on your neck... "Let me get that for you." His voice sent tingles straight to your aching cunt. Dottore had never touched you like this before... Your thoughts swirled in a frenzy in your mind. Fantasizing about him bending you over right there and fucking you senseless. You must have been silent for too long because he let out a breathy laugh, the test tube held in front of your heated face, "Aren't you going to take it, dear?" Your cunt clenched around nothing as you bit your lip and took the test tube from his hands, muttering your thanks.
His hands lingered, moving down your body. You tried to contain yourself when you swore you felt something hard poking your ass. Did he really want you as much as you wanted him? You wanted to look at him, see what kind of expression he had. You began to try and turn around only to be pushed further into the shelf, the spare glassware rattled from the impact. Dottore's sly smile that played upon his lips. The dark look in his eyes... Everything that was happening made your breath quicken. "What's going on in that pretty little head of yours, huh? Anything you want to share?", he was taunting you. He wanted to push the boundaries with you. You blushed hard. You were finally getting the attention you desired but you couldn't get the words out. He stepped away from you with a small laugh, "You don't have to tell me. Your face says it all." With one last smirk, he walked away, leaving you flustered.
—
Nothing else happened for awhile after that. This bothered you greatly. Fuck... You were so close to getting exactly what you wanted, yet you had to go and fuck it up by being unable to speak. But with what had happened, your fantasies ran rampant in your mind. You felt yourself grow slick with arousal as you lay in your bed. You kept replaying the way he had looked at you, the way he touched you... You let out a frustrated groan when your fingers just weren't enough to bring you over the edge. You wondered if he was laid up in his bed fantasizing about you in the way you were of him. You let yourself fall asleep, frustrated, sexually and emotionally.
Dottore stood there over your sleeping form. His cock stirring to life as he rubbed himself through his pants at just how innocent you looked as you slept. You rolled onto your back in your sleep, muttering his name. His eyes squeezed shut as he palmed himself with more pressure. You had said his name in your sleep. You must have been dreaming about him. Dottore lets out a groan of satisfaction. His sweet little student was thinking of him in their sleep... He pulled his heavy cock from his pants, pumping his length over your sleeping form. Little did he know, the slick sound of him jerking off and his soft deep grunts woke you. You opened one eye just enough to see his eyes tightly shut and his large hand wrapped around his cock. You wanted to use this to your advantage. You wanted his cum. Needed it.
You let out a soft breathy moan of his name, causing him to release all over your face with a choked groan. You did your best to act as though you were still asleep and simply dreaming of him. He smirked as he kneeled down next to you, tucking himself back into his pants. He admired how much prettier you looked with his cum splattered across your sweet face. Dottore takes his finger, running it through his release. Once he gathered enough on his finger, he gently pressed it into your slightly parted mouth. It took everything in you to not suck his finger and swirl your tongue around it to taste everything he was giving you. He hoped you would wake up with the taste of his essence still on your tongue. He removed his shirt and used it to gently wipe the remaining cum off of your face (much to your dissatisfaction). He leaned down, pressing a kiss to your forehead and whispered, "Sweet dreams, little one."
—
You woke up the next day with the taste of his cum still on your tongue. Your needy little pussy was soaked and aching to be filled by his cock. Images of Dottore touching you even more than he did that day in the lab up against the shelves, kissing your neck and down your body as his hands gripped your hips. These fantasies were eating you alive, but now you knew for sure he felt the same. Why else would he do what he did last night? You got up from your bed and make your way to the shower. Your clothes dropped to the floor and you let the water run down your body as your thoughts flood your mind. He consumed your life and you hoped you consumed his just as much. You were in so deep now, there was no going back. Not like you wanted things to end right when they had started getting good. You needed him. He needed to be yours. No one else's.
The days passed by and you felt as though you were going fucking insane. He made no new moves on you and things felt as though they took several steps back from the progress you thought you had made. Little did you know that Dottore was planning even more in his twisted mind. He was being so careful with his manipulation. Giving then pulling away. He wanted to drive you crazy and make you feel like you needed him in order to survive. He wanted your thoughts to be on him and only him. It didn't take long for you to notice him touching you more frequently. His fingers lingering as if he wanted to memorize the way you felt against his fingertips. He began pressing himself against you as he passed behind you. The feeling made you almost feral. Did he not realize your cunt was constantly soaked and dripping because of him?!
You made sure to dress a little more provocatively to keep his attention and his touches frequent. You were subtle enough to keep him guessing if you were dressing like this for him or if your style was simply changing as time when on. Archons did he hope you were doing it for him. One evening you sat across from Dottore, pushing your food around your plate with your chopsticks, caught up in thoughts of him pushing the dishes off the table and fucking you right there. He studied you curiously, wanting to pry into your sick little mind, "Is everything alright, dear? You know you can tell me anything. I'll listen." You snapped out of your dirty thoughts, looking up at him with a dazed expression. You rubbed your thighs together to ease your aching pussy, the frustration bubbling up to the surface, tired of playing fucking mind games, "What are we doing." He tilted his head slightly at your words, he sensed the frustration and wanted to push you further, "Whatever do you mean? We are research partners. I am your mentor. Does that not satisfy you?"
Your face heated up and you clenched your jaw. What was his deal? Didn't he want you like you wanted him? You took a deep breath and tried to compose yourself, "Thank you for everything you've done for me. I.. I guess I am satisfied." Before you could continue, Dottore cut you off, his palms pressed against the table as he leans over it, "Always so humble.." He tucked a strand of your hair behind your ear and leaned in even closer to your face. Your expression a mix of frustration and confusion. "Too bad I'm not satisfied", his tone dark. Your thoughts run wild yet again and he smirks, "Be mine. I can give you even more than what I give you now. After all... It's only fair... You owe me so much..."
You swore your pupils dilated, your breath quickened, and fuck, you were dripping. Dottore thought he was so clever for everything that had happened leading to this point. A sick smirk on his face which turns to slight confusion when your lips curl into a smile. You looked just as crazed as him. His eyebrows furrowed as he tried to decipher just what exactly was going on. Before he could ask you, you closed the gap, slamming your lips against his in a heated kiss. Dottore gasped in surprise but it slowly morphed into a low groan as you gently bit down on his bottom lip. As you finally broke away, breathing heavily, he got up and quickly made his way over to your side of the table. He grabbed your wrist pulling you up and pinned you roughly against the wall.
The look on his face should have scared you, but it only served to make you even more wild for him. Dottore pinned your wrists above your head with one hand and caressed your cheek with the other, "What a turn of events, little one..." He leaned in, his lips grazing yours as he looked into your eyes with deep intensity, "You're not going to leave me. Not now..." He paused, his tongue flicking out to lick your lips, "Not ever." You let out a breathy moan. This is all you've ever wanted. Fuck, it was finally happening. You were practically shaking against him, not to be mistaken for fear but of unbridled arousal and desperate need. "I'm yours... and you're mine", your breath danced across his lips as you spoke. You rolled your hips forward to grind against his hardness. Your words and every sensation he felt with you in that moment made him snap.
Dottore tore open your blouse, buttons flying across the room. He let go of your wrists to cup your breasts, a sick sense of pleasure washes over both of you. If only you could see the deeply depraved looks you showed the other in this moment. You bit down on your lip as he pinched and rolled your pebbled nipples between his fingertips. He couldn't get enough of every little expression you made. He wanted to see more... One hand travelled down your curves and makes its way to your aching center, moving your drenched panties to the side. He tilted his head a bit, giving you a dark smirk as he gently and slowly pressed a finger to your clit, drawing a small, frustrated whimper from you, "Your little cunt is absolutely soaked... It's just begging for me to claim it."
Your gaze danced between his eyes, lips, and down to where he was toying with your swollen clit, "It's yours to take. Always has been." Your voice a mere breath, drawing a growl from his lips as he plunged two fingers into your cunt. Tears of arousal and relief slipped down your soft cheeks, your jaw hanging open in a soundless moan. Dottore leaned forward, licking the salty tears from your cheeks. Archons, it was such a disgusting act yet it made you pulse around his digits. "Did it feel like this in your little fantasies of me?", his tone was teasing and dark. A small depraved smile tugs at your lips as you let out a breathy reply, "This is even better." There was a glint in your eyes, a dangerous one, "I need more."
You pushed him away and a stumbles slightly, caught off guard and his fingers leave you empty. You didn't care so much as you were now quickly getting to your knees and fumbling with getting his pants undone. Dottore looked down in surprise. Everything you've been doing has been throwing him off. Did his careful manipulation actually work on you to make you like this or did you play your own little games with him as well? You smirked up at him as you free his heavy cock, pumping it in your small hand. He wished he could take a picture of how you looked right then. So fucking devious, as if you planned this whole thing. He was the one who was supposed to be playing you to get what he wanted... His thoughts were interrupted when you took his length into your mouth, a rumbling groan rips from his chest as he took in the sensation of your hot mouth and your your tongue swirling around his cock.
He gripped onto your hair, tangling his fingers in it as he began thrusting into your throat. You choked, your throat tightening around his thick length made his eyes roll back, "Thaaat's it... Take it." You felt so much bliss in this moment. Your object of desire was finally where you wanted him to be. Letting him throat fuck you was just too good. You felt his grip tighten and you knew he was about to cum. You fought to gain control again, pulling away and digging your nails into his thighs. He winced slightly and let go, allowing you to remove your mouth from his throbbing cock. Dottore narrowed his eyes down at you, getting pissed at the smug look on your face as you begun to stand up, "You're not cumming unless you're filling up my cunt." Your lips grazed his as you whisper, "Breed me. Make me yours, Zandik."
That was fucking it. Hearing his real name fall from your gorgeous lips was the final straw. Dottore grabbed you harshly, pushing all the dishes from the table and onto the floor. The sound of glass breaking was barely registered by either of you as he bent you over the table. One hand pushed the middle of your back down, pressing you harder against the rough wood as the other hand lined his leaking cock up with your dripping entrance, "This is going to hurt, dear." No words could describe the absolute fucking pleasure you both felt as he forced his way inside your tight cunt. Drawn out moans fell from both of you as Dottore sank deeper into you. Once he was fully sheathed, he gripped your hair tugging your head up and using his other hand to grasp your chin so you were looking towards him, "Open your mouth." His command had you immediately obeying. He smirked as spat into your mouth, "Don't swallow. Keep it until I tell you otherwise."
You nodded, the taste of his saliva sitting on your tongue made you wish it was his cum instead. He gave your ass a harsh smack and released his grip on your hair. Your head involuntarily thrown back in pleasure from the smack and your wet pussy clenched tightly around his cock. A dark, crazed chuckles left Dottore's lips as he grabs onto the fat of your hips and begins slowly dragging his cock from your core. With just the tip left inside, he pauses, making you wiggle your hips in desperation. His grip tightens, "Ah ah, you get what I give you, little one." A whine leaves your lips, but before you could make more noise of protest, he slammed roughly into you. His pace was unwavering as tears of pleasure rolled down your cheeks, trying your best not to let his saliva he had given you earlier be swallowed or fall through your lips you were struggling to keep closed.
The way your gummy walls gripped and lubed his cock was highly intoxicating to him. He was finally having his way with you and he wasn't about to let this be a one time session. Depraved thoughts clouded his mind as he fucked into you, the tip of his dick hitting your cervix, making you cry out through closed lips. Dottore's thoughts ranged from impregnating you, keeping you naked and restrained to his bed, making you free use for him and only him. What made this somewhat funny in a fucked up way was that you were thinking the exact same thing. You were so desperate for him. Just the mere thought of his name made you insane. He was snapped from his twisted musings when he felt something gush down his cock on all over the floor. The absolute crazed smile on his face would be terrifying to any outsider, but he couldn't contain his emotions at the fact that he made you squirt all over his dick.
Dottore gripped your hair tightly yet again, yanking your head up to look up at him from over your shoulder. Fuck, you were so perfect with tears running down your reddened cheeks, your mouth obediently closed to hold the saliva that he considered a fucking gift to you. From that alone, his eyes rolled back and his cock throbbed inside of you, releasing thick, hot ropes of cum right up against your cervix. After letting his orgasm subside, he opened his eyes, looking directly into your fucked out gaze, "What a good little pet you've been... You may swallow." You swallowed the spit you had been holding in your mouth, not daring to break your gaze from his. The corners of your lips tugged into a sick smile, "Now you're mine and I am yours. You're never getting rid of me."
ê’·ê’Šê’·ê’·ê’Šê’Šê’·ê’Šê’·ê’·ê’·ê’Šê’·ê’·ê’Šê’Šê’·ê’Šê’·ê’·ê’·
a/n: the long awaited alternative version is here! i wanted to do so much more with this but it would’ve ended up as a short novel. hope you all enjoyed it😘
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fairylibe · 4 months ago
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yandere.ᐟ vogel × reader head canons.
660 words. yandere themes. may be ooc. features: darius vogel, nika schwarz, ring schwarz.
꒰ summary ꒱ what if an interest turned into something
 more?
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.đ–„” ʁ ˖ darius đ–Šč vogel àł€ đŸȘœ
was this so-called “love,” or maybe it was a twisted obsession? regardless he had fallen too deep with (
or was it “for”?) you to go back to a point before he knew you — far too deep.
admittedly, it was initially just an interest he had toward you. he wanted to get to know you, as you were crown’s fairytale keeper.
but it was as he was getting to know you, as he spent time with you, that he came to a realization.
although the whole of humanity is inherently flawed, there was one exception: you. maybe it was because, while you remained grounded, you also remained pure. while you looked kind, there was still a gentle fire in your eyes. everything about you was a perfect balance.
even if you weren’t cursed, he felt you were fit for his “family” — and more.
because you were the one and only perfect being in his eyes; that must be why he was drawn to you. the fact he could be so close to that one perfect thing was enough to send shivers, an illusion of “love.”
“ this world has no need for those impure souls who steal the bird’s song away. i will rid the world of all of them, so won’t you sing for me, fairytale keeper? ”
.đ–„” ʁ ˖ nica đ–Šč schwartz àł€ 🍒
he normally wasn’t one for much deep affections, so what was it with you that made him think about you so often? maybe it was because even when he would act friendly with you, your reactions felt so
 genuine.
yes, those reactions felt so raw — he almost couldn’t believe it himself. whenever you two ran into each other, he would casually greet you, calling you “robin” and teasing you. he gets more of a kick every time you make a retort, claiming it’s worth teasing you (playing with you). he enjoyed making you dance atop his hand.
but despite being the one teasing you, it almost seemed as though you would sometimes play with his feelings as well, making him feel something between love and bitterness.
so he would hold your hand, and play with your feelings in turn, like he would a toy. so that if you fell in love with him, he could watch you pine in an unrequited love.
he may not be able to reciprocate your feelings, but at the very least, you can fall into a bitter warmth together.
“ i told you that all you have to do is not hold my hand, but if you’ve taken it of your own will, won’t you become my plaything? until there’s nothing left to lose, for me
 and for you, robin. ”
.đ–„” ʁ ˖ ring đ–Šč schwartz àł€ 💍
there is no such thing as being too protective when it comes to ring. at first, he had tried to push you away, because what reason was there for you to get close to him? if dari had ordered him to kill you, he would do exactly that.
and yet, you had reached out a hand to him, asking for a friendship. nika had warned him — “you can’t make friends with them, ring” — and yet the hand that reached out to him seemed so warm and gentle

it was a somewhat fragile friendship, and it felt like a single word from dari or nika could shatter it to a million pieces, seeing as you two were in different organizations. and yet, you had shown him so many firsts.
eventually, he became scared, anxious, even. what was this feeling?
he wanted to protect this friendship he had with you, he wanted you to show him more and more “firsts,” he wanted to protect you.
“ if dari orders me to kill you someday
 i would still do it. that wouldn’t change — i owe him my own life. but, if that were ever to happen, i would kill a part of myself after for you. ” if he were to remember you, would you show him more firsts after the last?
fin.
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꒰ tag list . ꒱ @drachonia @weepinglycoris @letter-from-afar @.comment to be added or removed!
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cheolaholic · 9 months ago
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ring of love; csc (05)
summary; agreeing to join vernon spectate an underground boxing match wasn't how you'd expect to spend your friday night. you also didn't expect to see seungcheol, someone you've lost contact with for years, become a part of the ring.
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modern! au ‱ boxer! au ‱ hhu focused ‱ multiple kinds of tropes ‱ fluff, angst, smut
a/n;; omg, i'm alive????? jkjk, work's been piling up lately and i'm honestly drained by the time I get back home so I couldn't do much writing or even qc the draft before yoinking them into a tumblr draft 💀 but anyways, hope yall enjoy this chapter !! uri boo makes a small little cameo in this chapter :D a part of the angst in this fic has also arrived, pls be prepared (it’s not that heavy tho).
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You were 15 when you experienced your first ‘heartbreak’. Though, you call it a ‘heartbreak’ solely because it was a “for the lack of a better word” situation. A week before summer break, your parents had announced that the three of you would be flying off to Jeju to visit your grandparents.
You adore your grandparents, and they adore you just as much. Before you started middle school, you remember constantly flying off to Jeju, or even taking the ferry, to visit them every holiday and school break possible. Even during the initial stage of your move to the small town, your parents had sent you off to your grandparents as they sorted out the heavier parts.
Your grandparents had brought you to the beach, taught you how to make kimchi and even brought you to one of the fireworks shows during your stay. But, when you started middle school and were bombarded by a shit ton of schoolwork, you weren’t able to visit them as often.
So, you were ecstatic when your parents announced the Jeju trip. Both Aki and Seungcheol could see the excitement and happiness in your eyes as you told them about your plans.
Aki asking you questions about Jeju while Seungcheol listens to both of you with a small smile on his face. “how long will you be there, pup?” he asks, cheek leaning against the palm of his hand.
“Uhm
 I think maybe for two weeks? I’m not really sure
 Dad did ask mom if she wanted me to tag along with them to London afterwards
”
“Oh? What are they gonna be doing in London?”
“They have a business meeting that lasts at least two days. But, they decided to stay back a week for a mini vacation.”
“Do you want to go?” Aki asks as she pops a piece of strawberry into her mouth, stealing a glance at Seungcheol, noticing the way his shoulders are slumped at the mention of you thinking of joining your parents overseas.
Dude looks like a puppy not wanting its owner to leave it alone
 she thought to herself, finding the scene in front of her amusing.
“Well, whether or not you want to join your parents, I’m sure you’ll enjoy yourself regardless!” she spoke.
“Take good care of yourself, pup,” Seungcheol added as he reached out a hand and patted your head, sending a faint blush spreading across your cheeks and a teasing smile on Aki’s lips, “If you ever need anything, call me, okay?”
“Or me!”
The older male rolled his eyes at Aki’s words, smiling when you nod your head.
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“Seungkwannie!” you squealed out in happiness as you ran up to your cousin who was standing out at the gates of your grandparent's house, engulfing him in a big hug. “I can’t believe you’re here! Mom and Dad said that you’d be in Biyangdo!”
“And miss out on the chance to spend time with my favourite cousin? Never!” Seungkwan proclaimed as he pecked your cheek. “I haven’t seen you in years, ___! There’s no way I’d pass off the opportunity to spend time with you while you’re here!”
Seungkwan is your cousin from your mom’s side of the family. Before the age of 5, you don’t remember much about meeting Seungkwan other than the stories both your parents would tell you over family dinners. For example, when you asked them about the scar Seungkwan had on his chest, his dad said you were the one that left it on him. They proceeded to tell the story of how you had scratched Seungkwan because he had refused to let you watch Pocoyo on tv when both of you were just 3.
Or when his mom would ask you if you remembered Seungkwan hiding in the closet to scare you, but you ended up crying because you had thought he went home. So, instead of scaring you, he came out of the closet and both your parents found the two of you cuddled up on the floor the next morning
After Seungkwan helped you and your parents move the luggage into your grandparent’s home, Both of you sat on the porch, drinking the lemonade your grandmother had prepared. “How’re you, aunt and uncle doing?” he asks, “I heard from Uncle Lee that you’re starting high school soon! probably in a few months, right?”
“Things have been the same, besides the whole mom and dad having to go overseas occasionally and I had to stay with either Aki or Seungcheol.”
“Speaking of Seungcheol, how’s that little crush of yours on him going?” Seungkwan asked with a teasing smile, nudging your sides, “Ever thought of telling him before he graduates? There’s a chance he might head off to the big cities or even abroad for college.”
You were silent for a moment.
You have thought about telling Seungcheol your feelings, but you never thought about the timing. Now that his graduation is nearing, you still haven’t told him. As you were still stuck in your thoughts, Seungkwan places a hand on your shoulder, “Well, whatever happens, I wish you happiness.“
“You say that as if I’m leaving you forever.”
“Hey, let me be sentimental!”
Just as you rolled your eyes, you felt your phone vibrate - you had gotten a text from Aki.
aki: did you make it to Jeju safe? ___ bestie <3: yeap! ___ bestie <3: i’m with my cousin rn ___ bestie <3: [sent an attachment] aki: ooh, he’s cute ___ bestie <3: want me to introduce you? aki: gurl aki: don’t try to matchmake me when you’re struggling to tell Seungcheol about how you feel aki: and besides aki: your cousin is cute, but he’s not my type ___ bestie <3: wow ___ bestie <3: you really just did me dirty aki: i’m just saying ___ aki: better tell him before you lose the chance aki: besides your romantic struggles aki: have fun and take lots of pictures! aki: can’t wait to see them when you get back <3 ___ bestie <3: i will!
“Are you gonna stay here with grandma and grandpa while Aunt and Uncle Lee fly out to London?” Seungkwan asks as you set down your phone, refilling his glass of lemonade. You shrugged, still debating on whether or not you wanted to join your parents. “I’m honestly stuck in between
 On one hand, I want to see what other countries are like. On the other, I haven’t seen grandma and grandpa in years
”
Your mother who was on her way to give you both a plate of strawberries overheard the conversation and tried her best to help you with your indecisiveness. “___, sweetie,” she began as she set the plate on the wooden porch floor, “you can always travel in the future when you’re all grown up.”
“That sounds like you just want her to stay here in Jeju so you and uncle can enjoy yourselves without her presence,” Seungkwan teased, earning a forehead flick from your mother.
“Well, she’ll be in your care too, Seungkwan. I hope I won’t return to a sassy, diva daughter after leaving her here with you.”
Seungkwan gasps dramatically, placing a hand over his chest at your mother’s statement. “Aunt Lee, I’m hurt and offended.”
“You’re just further proving my point, Seungkwan.”
“Hey, the sass could end up helping her in the future!”
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cheollie: hey, pup cheollie: mom said you and your parents made it to Jeju safely cheollie: how are you feeling? cheollie: did you get motion sickness during the flight? cheollie: did you eat dinner yet? sweet pup: ehh, the motion sickness wasn’t that bad sweet pup: grandma made lemonade :D sweet pup: and yes, i ate dinner! sweet pup: grandpa grilled some mackerel sweet pup: [sent an attachment] sweet pup: and look at how fat the strawberries are :0 sweet pup: [sent an attachment] cheollie: wow cheollie: those look good cheollie: hey, do you think it’s alright if we have a call? sweet pup: like, right now? cheollie: yea sweet pup: oh sweet pup: um, let me head out to the porch cheollie: take your time, pup
As you quietly exited the room you were staying in and out onto the porch, you picked up Seungcheol’s incoming call, feeling the butterflies in your stomach intensify when you heard his deep, “Hey, pup.”
“Hi, Cheollie! Have you had your dinner?” you asked, getting a small hum as a response. “Dad got a deal with a big client so he bought steak for us. Mom also cooked calamari.”
“Wow, it must’ve tasted amazing
”
“Yeah, it was. But, tell me about your dinner, ___. I’m sure you had more than just grilled mackerel.” Seungcheol chuckled, a blush spreading across your cheeks as you mentally cussed at how the older male still has an effect on you despite being 2 hours away and talking to you through a phone.
“Well
 Mom made raw crabs and seafood soup!”
“Looks like my little puppy is eating well... That’s good.”
“Is there another reason you wanted to call, Cheollie?”
There was a moment of silence on the other end, making you slightly anxious. You hear a faint rustling, thinking he must be lying on his bed as he’s talking to you. A sigh was heard before Seungcheol told you his motive for calling you - and to say it had you on the floor was an understatement.
No, this man had you envisioning a future with him.
“I miss you.”
When you didn't respond, Seungcheol got worried, calling out your name on the other end while you remained stunned at his confession.
“U-uhm, yeah?”
“Did that make you uncomfortable, pup?”
“No, no, it just
 It just caught me by surprise
”
You hear Seungcheol chuckle, and more rustling can be heard before he speaks again. “Well, I’m used to having you around me, twenty-four seven, ___. It feels weird when you’re not.”
“I’ll be back in two weeks, Cheollie. You’re being dramatic!”
Maybe he was, the older male thought to himself. But, he pushes that thought to the back of his head as he finally tells you the real reason he’s calling you.
“My parents are thinking of bringing me to Seoul this weekend to check out a few unis
 I just thought that I’d let you know since, y’know
 I’m graduating soon
”
Your heart sank at the mention of him graduating. You knew it was bound to happen - you even told yourself to not be too sad when he does end up moving out of Daegu for college. But, to hear it coming from Seungcheol himself, the reality hit harder.
“Oh
 Well, I’m happy for you!” you tried your best to hide the sadness in your voice, though he still picked it up. “Pup, I’m not going away forever. You’ll still see me when I come back during breaks and when you leave for college, you can come over to Seoul, too!” he assures you, chuckling to himself as he continues, “Maybe our parents might even have us share an apartment so I can watch over you.”
Humming, you stared up into the sky, mesmerised by the stars that were scattered along the blanket of the night sky.
“___?”
“Yea
?”
“Remember what I taught you during our taekwondo sessions?”
“What about it?”
“Don’t forget how to use them, okay? Can’t have my little puppy all defenceless now, can I?”
you bit your lip as Seungcheol went on with his words, how he wished he could stay in Daegu longer so he could spend more time with you. How he wanted to explore the bigger city in Daegu with you (where he implies it being just two of you and without Aki who would often nag at him for having a bad taste in things).
“I’m gonna miss you
” you muttered quietly, not knowing how or what else you were supposed to say. You weren’t going to tell him about your feelings, that’s for sure. but, a part of you wished you could.
Who knows? Maybe you both could end up being something.
“It’s getting late, pup. you must be tired from the flight and settling in. Goodnight, ___.”
“Goodnight, Cheollie
”
When the call ended, you stared at the screen of your phone, a million thoughts racing through your head. You couldn’t put a finger on it, but you had a sinking feeling in your stomach. perhaps you were overthinking the whole situation or something wrong was bound to happen. Whatever it was, you quietly got back into your room and crawled into bed.
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Something didn’t feel right.
It was the weekend Seungcheol was due to head to Seoul to have a look at the city and attend a few of the education fairs - and not once, had you gotten a single message from him.
In fact, in the days leading up to that weekend, he had been quiet too. His replies were either short, took too long or there weren’t any replies at all.
It makes you feel uneasy.
“Still no updates from loverboy?” Seungkwan asks, glancing over your shoulder and peeking at your phone, seeing the wall of texts about how the past few days have gone down for you. When you sulkingly shake your head, Seungkwan’s heart aches as he sees his favourite cousin down in the dumps.
“Hey,” he calls out in a gentle tone, throwing an arm around your shoulder and pulling you close. “Maybe he’s just caught up with those college things. Sooner or later he’s bound to update you, right? Besides, you should be busy having fun here in Jeju!”
Looking at your phone one last time, you shoved it back into your pocket and let Seungkwan drag you to a food street, saying how they added more delicious treats since the last time you visited.
By evening, there was still no news about or from Seungcheol. You’ve tried calling him multiple times, but they all end up going to voicemail. It was starting to affect you and your parents began to take notice, but decided to not question it for fear of triggering an episode. After dinner, you decided to call Aki in an attempt to get some form of comfort.
“I just don’t understand, Aki,” you told her, “I texted him, even called him but I got nothing! What if something bad happened to him?”
“Hey now, you’re probably overthinking things. He might just be sorting those uni documents out - you know how lengthy and taxing they can be. Maybe, he’s just tired and needs some rest!”
“You think so?”
“It’s just a guess, ___. whatever it is, I’m sure it isn’t anything serious.”
Oh, how you wished it really wasn’t anything serious.
When the time came to send your parents off at the airport for their trip to London, you had sent a message to Seungcheol and yet again, you got no response. One thing you came to realise in recent years, was how big of an over-thinker you are. It was something you hated and while your family, Seungcheol and Aki have done whatever they can to help you lessen your overthinking, that still doesn’t stop it from creeping up on you from time to time.
Seungkwan does his best to cheer you up. Bringing you to more food streets, a maze field, and even the seaside to take your mind off of Seungcheol but alas, it was as if Seungcheol had taken over your mind just like the virus in ‘The Last of Us’. One evening as you sat on the sand of the beach, staring off into the horizon, Seungkwan came up and sat next to you.
“I know this might not sound nice, but you can’t let something like Seungcheol not responding to you ruin your trip, ___. Sure, it’s upsetting having someone you’ve known for years and care for go ghost on you, but it’s kind of
 pathetic, to let it ruin what could be a fun summer vacation.”
As much as those words hurt you, Seungkwan was right.
You hadn’t seen your family that lived in Jeju for years and now that you can, you’re letting something like your crush not responding to you ruin it. “Then, what should I do, Kwannie
?” you asked, wiping the tears that were starting to stream down your face, “I don’t wanna leave Jeju knowing I didn’t get to spend time with you and our grandparents
”
“How about you try calling him only once? If he doesn’t pick up, we’ll forget about it and move on, okay?”
You give it a thought, minutes passing by before you pick up your phone and dial Seungcheol’s number, placing it near your ear.
“We’re sorry, the number you have dialled cannot be reached.”
Seungkwan noticed your body shaking as you redialled the number, your breathing starting to grow shallow.
“We’re sorry, the number you have dialled cannot be reached.”
“___?” Seungkwan calls out, placing a gentle hand on your shoulder. When you began to cry, he pulled you into a hug, rubbing your back as you cried your heart out. “Shhh, it’s okay, ____. it’s okay.”
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When you got back to Daegu, your heart dropped at the sight of the empty house next to yours. the entire house looked as if it were fully emptied (which it was) - the potted plants Mrs. Choi had displayed on the gates were nowhere to be seen, the shoes that were neatly arranged on the shoe rack weren’t there anymore, and the Choi’s family car wasn’t parked in its usual place.
“I guess they must’ve moved since Seungcheol is going to start college soon
” your mother tells your father who hums in response as he unloads the luggage from the trunk of the taxi. When she notices the sadness and tears in your eyes, she immediately starts comforting you.”Oh, sweetie
 Does it upset you that much?”
“I
 I couldn’t even say goodbye to him
” you sobbed out, “I couldn’t even see him one last time before he left
”
“Oh, princess
” your father coos after bidding the taxi driver goodbye, hugging you tight as your mother does the same, “I’m sure he feels sad for not being able to do the same, hmm?”
“Will
 Will I
 Will I be able to see him again?” you asked through hiccuped sobs, wiping your tears away as more kept spilling. Your mother nods, giving you a pat on the head. “I'm sure you will, honey.”
“He said he’s thinking of joining University of Pledis, right?” your father asked, a small smile on his face when you nod, “Then, you just need to study hard and get in there too! That way, you can finally be reunited with prince charming!”
despite your tears, you still manage to laugh at your dad’s tease. “Dad!”
“Ah-ah, don’t think we didn’t know about your little crush on Seungcheol, ___.” he responded, chuckling as he gave your arm an assuring squeeze.
“Whatever the future has in store, I’m sure the two of you will meet again.”
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taglist (unable to tag a few ㅠㅠ)
@yoonclip @1004luvangel @catjunhui @mystikha @spk93 @tinkerbell460 @yoozuku @dnylwoo @christinewithluv @limbomoon @plutoxxxworld @i-give-up-1234 @m1ngyuc0re @yunloyal @leclercloverbot @bettybeako @billboard-singer @ocyeanicc @krupyadoorrahe @seobinnieshi @xcynthiaaa @k411z @disneyprincesshuri @sunnyapp @khxsh @staygenezy @loufi8iepuff @ursweetener @noisypapergalaxy @wonwootakemyheart @sugainpinksweater @leah-rose03 @thisisnotthelastofus @yearnoclock @kwonhoeshi @minhui896 @ohmygodwhyareallusernamestaken @ru-lin @deobiforever @belladaises @cheoliekkuma @duskunt1ldawn @hyneyedfiz @marshmallowshouse @ak6ko @chwevernonlover @jejuboo-s @tsukinluv @atinytinaa @gyros-cum-sock @soupbinlily @jungwoos-luvr @ener-energy @watermelon-sugars-things @cyberpunkhwx @ddaengpotate @nightwingsrobbinhoods @chaerrylov3r @joshuaahong @wonussmile @uliceeeeeeee @wonwoo24 @shinetogether17 @simplejihoon @luvkpopp
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atinylittlepain · 2 years ago
Note
i need joel x f! reader friends to lovers đŸ˜©đŸ«¶đŸ»
i took this and ran with it
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Birds of a Feather
joel miller x f!reader
joel masterlist
joel has met his match, and though he's trying to keep things platonic, his brother has other plans for him.
warnings | 18+ smut, drunk tommy miller requires his own warning, angst, and a little fluff
wordcount: 4.1K
................................
Joel Miller has finally met his match, and he knows it. He had balked at it initially, when Tommy assigned him to patrol with some woman. But it wasn’t just some woman. Folks around town call her Sunshine, a running joke since she’s anything but. He didn’t know anyone could be more standoffish than him, but that first shift together, the steel in her stare and the tick of her jaw had thrown any of his ideas about her right out the window. Is it any wonder they became friends so fast?
He doesn’t like to talk much, she doesn’t either.
He has a dry sense of humor, but hers has to be even drier. 
She refuses to suffer fools, and he enjoys watching her put men in their place.
He’s slow to thaw toward people, and so is she, both of them melting in each other’s presence.
Where he’s from Texas, she’s from Tennessee, the remnants of their drawls twining up in easy conversation.
He likes a stiff glass of whiskey at the end of the day, and she’s always game to join him.
But maybe one of the things he likes best is that while he’s good at pool, she’s fucking great at it, and he doesn’t mind getting his ass handed to him on Friday nights at the bar, not when it’s her doing the handing.
“Are you asleep, Miller? Or are you really just that bad at pool?” Her grin flickers under the dim lights of the Tipsy Bison, and he knows that it’s a sight not many people get to see. She cocks her head to the side, spinning her cue stick lightly in her hand as she smirks at him.
“Easy, darlin, gonna make you eat those words one of these days.” She’s not Sunshine, not to him, he refuses to call her what everybody else does. She had confessed to him once, on a long patrol shift, that she hated the nickname, but was too proud to ever say anything about it. In turn, Joel had told her about how growing up, Tommy managed to get everyone at their highschool to start calling him “Skip,” something he hadn’t told anyone in close to thirty years. His residual embarrassment had been worth it to see her smile in that moment, and it was about then that Joel realized he had made a certified friend. Though everyone else seems convinced that something a little more is going on.
“Shit.” He completely scratches his next turn, sending the cue ball right into one of the pockets as she snickers.
“What was that about me eating my words?” He’s distracted, just a little, but who could blame him when she’s wearing a pair of cut-offs that should be illegal and a tank top that turns downright obscene when she leans over the table for her own turn. So maybe there is something a little more going on, but it’s one sided, he reckons, and he’s not about to fuck up the first friendship he’s cared about in years just because he’s thinking with his dick. But, apparently, that’s not the only thing he has to worry about.
“Well, howdy, if it ain’t Jackson’s favorite tag team, frick and frack.” Joel hasn’t seen Tommy this drunk in decades. The town council had been celebrating that night, though he’s not quite sure what. Regardless, Tommy is sloshed as he loops and arm over Joel’s shoulders, a lazy grin on his face as he looks between him and her.
“Joel, Sunshine. How are we this fine evening?” While she snorts at his slurred-out question, Joel is less than amused, shrugging his brother off of him with a huff.
“Touchy, touchy, big brother. What’s got your panties in a twist? Did you break his heart already, Sunshine?” Joel can feel his face blanch at Tommy’s drawling words, glancing between him and her. While she’s still smiling, the crease between her brows suggests she’s as thrown off as Joel is.
“What’re you on about, little Miller?” Tommy lets out a hoot of a laugh at her question, leaning up against the pool table and grinning at her.
“What I’m on about is the sweet little crush this big guy right here has on you. It ain’t healthy, really, Joel’s got it bad for you.” If they weren’t related by blood, Tommy wouldn’t have teeth in his head by now, but instead, Joel settles for letting his jaw all but drop to the floor as he looks between his giggling brother and her. She doesn’t look so amused anymore.
“It’s true! Ain’t seen his eyes get like that in a long time, those big ol’ puppy dogs of his are for you and you only, Sunshine.” Before the horror of it all can really settle in, Tommy sighs, slapping Joel on his shoulder and shuffling off with a low murmured “where’s Maria?”
Her eyes are wide when he finally looks at her, lips parted, complete bewilderment splashed across her face. And before she can say anything, Joel is turning heel and booking it out of there before everything comes crumbling down around him.


She’s stunned. By the whole thing really. Tommy’s ridiculous musings, the way that Joel didn’t deny any of it, and then the way he booked it out of the bar like he wanted nothing to do with her. She wouldn’t have guessed in a million years that her night was going to turn out like this. Not that she would tell anyone, but she loves Friday nights, pool nights, when she gets to spend just a little more time with Joel than usual. So for it to turn so sour so fast, she finds herself at a loss, clutching her cue stick in her hands, stuck standing where Joel left her.
There’s no two ways about it, she likes him. Things feel easy around him. She hadn’t met anyone else in town who she could talk to like she can him. He gets it, being on the road, not always having a warm place to sleep, what it means to kill. They’ve both seen a far different life than the one they’re living now, and talking to him makes her feel a little less crazy. And yes, maybe she also likes the strong cut of his jaw, the way his deep brown eyes crinkle up when she talks to him, the broad span of his shoulders, and how he squares them up when she challenges him. You could call it a crush, but she’d call it stupid, something that would only ruin the friendship, the one big good in her life, that she has with him. 
But now all bets are off. She’s got nothing to lose, and she’ll be damned if she doesn’t get the truth from him.
She knows him well enough by now to have a pretty good idea of where he stomped off to, and she doesn’t waste any more time standing around with a dumb look on her face, heading out of the bar and into the hazy light of the summer evening.
There’s a bench tucked away behind the stables, partially hidden by a small thicket of trees. A while ago, they had set it as their meeting place before patrol shifts, always getting there a few minutes early to set a plan for the day, or just to talk quietly before they had to head out. She had caught him there a few times on their days off too, an easy slump in his posture, his arms stretched out over the back of the bench. He told her he liked the quiet of it, and when she attempted to apologize for intruding, he had said that she couldn’t bother him if she even tried. It’s where she finds him now, his elbows on his thighs and his head in his hands, though his eyes jerk up when she clears her throat.
“We gonna talk about what just happened?” He lets out a long sigh, sitting back on the bench and squinting up at her.
“I’d rather not.”
“Oh, c’mon, Joel. You know I’m not gonna let this go, not until you talk to me.” With that, he gets up from the bench with a huff, crossing his arms over his chest.
“Don’t have anything to say, except I’m sorry that my brother is such a fucking idiot.” She calls after him as he trudges away, but it’s no use, he doesn’t so much as look back over his shoulder at her. Knowing him as well as she does, she can easily tell when it’s time to stop prodding, when he’s shutting down and she won’t be able to get anything out of him, so she drops it, at least for now. 
She knows that they’re going to have to face whatever this is eventually, most likely the next morning when they’re set for a patrol shift together. With the hope of a clearer conversation on the horizon, she goes home, her mind still spinning from the strange evening. She lays awake in bed with her thoughts, the only conclusion she reaches being that she just wants the truth now, knowing that there will be no going back to the way things were, regardless of what he has to say.
When she gets to the bench the next morning, eyes bleary from a night without sleep, it becomes clear that Joel is going to make this more difficult than it has to be, as he is nowhere to be found. And he doesn’t show up either, not even when it’s time for their shift and she’s mounting up at the stables. She lets out a bitter laugh, though, when she sees who does show up.
“Did he send you down here?” Tommy huffs, leaning up against the door to the stables with a sheepish grin.
“Would you be less pissed at him if I said he didn’t?” 
“What? He ask for a new patrol partner already?” She knows it sounds harsh, but she doesn’t care, anger starting to feel like the appropriate response for how childish Joel seems to be acting. Tommy just sighs.
“Look, Sunshine, I feel awful for what I said last night. I was so fucking drunk I didn’t know up from down. But it’s true what I said. Reckon he thinks you hung the moon in the sky or some shit.” That makes her pause, but she stifles the kick of her heart with another scoff.
“What’s your point, Tommy? I have a shift to cover.” 
“No you don’t.” 
“Huh?” Tommy lets out a breathy laugh at her furrowed look.
“I’m covering your shift– figure I owe you both for messing shit up so bad. I got a buddy of mine coming down in a few to patrol with me, but you’re off the hook. And I think you oughta go talk to him.” 
“Joel made it pretty clear last night that he didn’t have anything else to say.” Tommy’s frown deepens at her clipped words, and he takes a few steps into the stables, leveling a surprisingly serious look at her.
“My brother is a stubborn ass, I won’t deny that. He doesn’t really like people, or feelings for that matter. But I know him well enough to see that he’s different around you. And maybe it’s selfish of me to say this, but you’re good for him, and I’ll be damned if the only reason you two don’t wind up together is my big fucking mouth.” His words stun her silent long enough for him to step forward and place a hand on her shoulder.
“Just go talk to him, please? If anyone can get through to him it’s you.”


He has to admit to himself that he was hoping, just a little bit, that it’d be her knocking on his front door, his chest tightening when he sees that it is. Though she doesn’t seem all too pleased to be looking at him, her arms crossed over her chest and an edgy arch to her brow.
“We gonna talk like adults now? Or are you gonna keep sending little Miller to do your bidding?” He knows this tone of voice. It’s the way she speaks to people, usually men, that she’d rather not give the time of day to. He’s always been amused by it, the stiff jerk of her chin, the eerie calm of her words. But it’s never been directed at him before, and suddenly there’s nothing amusing about it. 
“I– yeah, yes. Let’s talk.” Real smooth, dumbass. She doesn’t wait for him to open the door any wider, brushing right past him and into his living room before turning on her heel to look at him.
“Well, there’s no real way around this, is there?” Her question hangs between them, a drooping thread threatening to snap, though even now, they still move comfortably around each other, sitting down on opposite ends of the couch and mirroring each other’s posture, elbows on thighs, heads tilted toward the other. 
“Where do you wanna start, darlin?” She huffs out a laugh, more like an exasperated sigh as she looks at him, the steel gone, only a quirked worry left in its place.
“The truth– I want you to tell me the truth, Joel– about what Tommy said last night.” He figures he’s got nothing to lose at this point. That either way, whether he’s straight with her or not, their friendship isn’t ever going to be the same, so he takes a deep breath, and lets the words come rushing out. 
“He wasn’t wrong– I mean, what he said? It’s true, I feel– I, uh– I like the way I feel? When I’m around you? And, um– Jesus christ, what I’m trying to say is– I feel very– fondly toward you.” He’d like to disappear now, to dissolve and slip down beneath the floorboards so she’ll stop smiling at him like he just made a complete fool of himself, because he did. 
“You feel fondly toward me, huh?” And now she’s making fun of him, a light laugh on her lips as he grumbles at her question. But she’s quick to catch his despairing spiral, scooting over and placing a hand on his knee. 
“I’m sorry, Joel. I don’t mean to tease. But for the record, the feeling’s mutual.” Oh. He can feel his eyebrows shoot up at her words, and her grin broadens at his reaction.
“You mean– you– what’s that word? You mean platoni–” She’s kissing him. She’s kissing him and his brain is going blank but he doesn’t need to think, not really, moving like he knows, like he’s been waiting for this. She’s as stubborn as he is, and it shows in the way they struggle against each other, pulling on clothes to get closer, teeth clashing just a bit as she slips into his lap, pushing him back against the couch as he drags her as close as he can. When she does pull away, he doesn’t let her go far, his hand holding her steady by the hilt of her neck, breathless and smiling.
“No, I don’t mean platonically. Not at all.” And then she’s kissing him again, and it’s quickly becoming his favorite feeling, though the way her hips are pressed up against his is a close second. Joel is starting to realize that they share a few other things in common as well.
They both have a hard time keeping quiet, his low groans mixing and mingling with the pitchy sighs she looses in between kisses.
And they both seem to want to get impossibly closer, his nose mashing up against the slope of her cheek as she winds her arms over his shoulder blades, holding him chest to chest.
Where he tries to get the upper hand, licking into her mouth, squeezing at the swell of her thighs, she just does the same, tugging at the hair at the nape of his neck to hold him just how she wants him as she ducks down to mouth at the arc of his neck.
Where he demands more, she’s happy to give, and to take in turn.
How they make it up the stairs and into his bedroom is beyond him, greedy hands peeling away clothes on the way up, leaving a trail of desire that they’ll have to trace later. 
She’s strong, just as strong as him, and she likes control, just as much as him, handily flipping them around on the bed so that she’s straddling him once again, leaving him wide-eyed and breathless at the sight of her. He’s got scars, and she does too, their hands running over the silvery marks, prayers that there won’t have to be anymore. Her bare cunt is a hot drag over his pelvis, and he’d like more than anything for her to shift her hips just a little lower, a little closer. But instead she ducks her head down, eyes flickering up to his as she lays a smear of kisses over his chest that begin to trail lower until she’s kneeling between his spread thighs. Joel thinks he just might die as he watches her spit into her hand before wrapping her palm around his throbbing cock, a hiss spilling between his teeth as she deftly sweeps her wrist up, her thumb swiping over his slit to smear the pooling pre-come there down his length.
“S’pretty, Joel. Prettier than I imagined.” He can’t help but groan at her words, scrunching his eyes shut and pressing his head back into the sheets.
“You– fuck– you thought about this, darlin? About me?” She smiles at his question, her lips just grazing the underside of him.
“Mmhmm, thought about you a lot. About this. We’re so alike, you and I. I couldn’t help but think that if anyone would be able to handle me, it’d be you.” And with that, she licks a salacious stripe up his length before taking him into the heat of her mouth.
“Christ– I  can– can handle you, darlin. Handle you however you want me to– fuck, that mouth of yours is a dream.” She hums at his praise, the vibration shooting straight down his cock as she bobs her head. It’s messy as hell, the slick sound of spit, her palm pressed flat against his stomach to hold him still, the drag of her tongue along his length, and the way her eyes stay on him, hooded and hazy under her lashes. 
“Thought about you too, y’know, like-like this.” His words make her stop for a moment, pulling off of him with a sigh, her hand picking up where she left off.
“And? Am I living up to your expectations?” Her words are lilted by her grin, and the sight of her lazily stroking his cock, her head tilted as she looks at him is nearly too obscene to be real.
“S’better– you’re so much better– fucking perfect.” It’s like he realizes all of a sudden how bad he wants to touch her, and then it’s all he wants, all he needs, coaxing her back up to meet in a kiss before rolling them over, swallowing the peel of laughter she lets out as he hovers over her. 
He wants to be the only one who gets her like this, the only one to hear her sighs, soft and melty in his sheets, sweet only for him as he swipes his fingers through her folds, dragging her pooling slick up to draw circles over her clit.
“So wet for me, darlin. S’just for me, huh?” Her chin jerks in a nod, whatever control she had now held in his hands, her hips canting up into his palm. 
“Just for you, Joel. All for you– please.” She doesn’t have to say anymore, he knows what she wants because it’s what he wants too. More. He presses two fingers inside of her, unable to stifle the groan he lets out at the feel of her cunt clenching around him, muffling the sound with a drag of kisses across her chest. She keens up into his touch, back arching when he takes one of her nipples into his mouth, tongue laving over the peak before letting his teeth just barely graze the delicate skin. And he learns her, all of her, the dips and swells of her body, the spot he can press against inside her that makes her brow crumple, the scrape of her nails down his back, the little whimpers she tries to silence, biting down on her lip, the way she tightens around his fingers when she’s close, and the broken sound of his name on her lips when she finally unravels for him, panting and twisting in pleasure. 
“That’s it, darlin. Feels good, huh? I did good for you?” Maybe it’s a little selfish, what he asks, but she’s happy to answer anyways.
“So good– did so good for me, Joel. Fuck, I really want you, baby.” He can feel the heat flushing up his face at her words, his mind going dizzy with the praise, and all he can do is give her what she wants, slotting his hips against hers and notching his leaking tip at her entrance. 
It’s unreal, it’s gotta be, the way she spreads open around him, close and pliant, her knee hitched up along his waist as he presses into her, both of them sighing at the stretch. For a moment, they’re still, just feeling each other, pressed so close, sweat-damp skin sticking from the contact, choppy exhales cooling down their shared heat. And then, Joel learns that they have something else in common. They both like their pleasure with just a tinge of pain.
It starts slow, the rock of his hips into hers, but she makes it clear with the press of her heel into his low back and her hand tugging in his hair that slow is the last thing she wants, and Joel is more than happy to oblige. The thump of the headboard against the wall, the slap of skin, harsh grunts and crackling moans twine around them, wrapping them up in a desperate symphony with each harsh grind of his hips against hers. 
He wants to leave marks, wants her to remember this when she runs her hands over the bruises he leaves, a purple and blue mosaic of where he touched her, where he wanted her most. And she seems intent on the same goal, nails scratching down his shuddering back, pulling him closer so she can mouth at his neck, her teeth nipping just a touch unkindly, making his eyes roll back from the sharp suggestion of pain. 
“Fuck, darlin– made just for me, huh? So good like this– wanna feel you like this– want you to gimme another one. Be so good for me, honey, c’mon.” 


All she wants is him. The hot drag of his cock inside her, his hips mashing up against hers, the heavy grip of his hand cupping her ass, pulling her hips up to meet his. His scruff, scraping against her chest, lips a smudge against her skin, each grunt a vibration that runs through her bones. The way he keeps her head from hitting the headboard with his forearm protectively curled there, holding himself up just enough to move his hips against hers, to look at her when she comes for a second time, spasming around him.
She feels like liquid beneath him, undone by pleasure, only vaguely aware of the breathy chant of please, please leaving her lips with each exhale. But he knows what she’s asking for, and Joel gives it to her, pulling out with a groan, his spend smearing across her heaving stomach as he pants over her. He flops down onto his stomach next to her with a sigh, one arm slung heavy over her waist, turned on his cheek to look at her. 
“Get you cleaned up in a minute– just need to not move right now– shit.” She has to laugh at his breathless exclamation, catching the crook of his grin out of the corner of her eye before turning onto her side to get a better look at him. Hair wild, sticking up all which ways, and cheeks flushed under his altogether boyish smile, she can’t help but lean in for a kiss that he gives up willingly to her. 
“Remind me again why we waited so long to do that?” That makes him laugh, squeezing her hip to pull her closer as he turns onto his side
“Because I was an idiot.” She hums at his answer, brushing his hair back out of his face before letting her palm settle along his scruff.
“It takes two, we were both idiots.” 
“Some pair we make, huh, darlin?” 
Some pair indeed.
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weevil-wallflower · 7 months ago
Text
A Jedi & A Droid
Cal Kestis x Jedi!Reader
Summary: Your life was never the same after You stumbled upon another Jedi and a droid.
Warnings/Tags: No warnings, SFW, hurt/comfort, minor angst, fluff, mutual pining, no use of Y/N, no pronouns used, pre/during Jedi: Survivor, minor spoilers for Jedi: Survivor.
A.N.: My third entry for Cal Kestis Week 2024! Prompts: Day 3 - Droid & Day 4 - "We shouldn't be doing this".
I am so late but responsibilities called! Also, this story, initially meant to be simple, got wayyy out of hand and turned into a combination of little snippets. So a bit of a wordy one but I am so happy to finally write this, as the idea had been sitting in my drafts for so long plus I really enjoyed writing it! I think this is one of my best stories yet :3 Gif by me!
Also on AO3!
Word Count: ~6,800
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After the crew of the Mantis had split apart, Cal found himself adrift in the galaxy with only BD-1 by his side, spending years drifting between missions and without a crew—a family. While working for Saw Gerrera, he had formed strong friendships with fellow rebels; Gabs, the Klatooinian twins Koob and Lizz, and Bravo. However, it never felt quite the same. He longed for the camaraderie and companionship he had once known, yearning for a friend, a family and perhaps even a partner, to share in their journey’s hardships and victories.
Then, one fateful day, while Cal and BD-1 were navigating through a crowded spaceport, they came across You—running desperately from a squad of unrelenting stormtroopers. Cal's sharp senses detected the hurry in your movements and the terror in your expression as You ran through the packed streets, desperately trying to evade capture.
Without hesitation, Cal leapt into action, his instincts kicking into overdrive as he made his way through the chaotic crowds, dodging blaster fire and weaving through narrow alleyways in pursuit of You. Out of breath, he finally caught up to You, halting You in your tracks and reached out a hand to offer his help.
“Come with us!” The redhead urged, his voice firm yet reassuring as he glanced back at the approaching stormtroopers. “We have a ship. We can help you escape.”
Despite the opportunity presented before You, You hesitated, your eyes wide with fear and uncertainty as You weight your options.
“I’m not getting in a stranger’s ship!” You protested, your voice trembling with apprehension.
Cal’s gaze softened, understanding the gravity of your situation as he met your gaze with unwavering determination.
“You have a better idea?” He asked, his tone gentle yet firm as he kept his hand extended towards You.
You still appeared hesitant but the thunderous footsteps of the approaching stormtroopers and the urgent “Beep-bo-beep!” from the droid perched on the redhead’s back sealed the deal, making You choose the lesser of two evils. With a slight nod, You reached out to take the redhead’s hand, feeling a sense of trust and reassurance wash over You like a wave. Was it the Force trying to tell You something? You had no time to dwell on it, however, as Cal led You to his ship.
As the three of you boarded the Mantis, Cal’s eyes widened with excitement when they fell on the lightsaber strapped to your side, realisation dawning on him.
“You’re a Jedi!” He exclaimed, surprise apparent in his voice. “That’s why those Imps were after you.”
The knowledge brought him some hope, knowing that he had finally found another Jedi besides Cere, after all these years.
You simply nodded and hesitantly took the offered co-pilot seat as the ship soared through the vast outer space. You were unable to shake the feeling of apprehension that gripped You. The knowledge that Cal now knew You were a Jedi filled You with a sense of unease, knowing all too well the dangers that come with being hunted throughout the Galaxy. The thought of bounty hunters and Imperial forces closing in on You sent a shiver down your spine, and You couldn’t help but wonder if trusting Cal was a mistake.
However, as You stole a glance at him while he piloted the ship, You noticed something that caught You off guard—a lightsaber attached to his belt, just like yours. Your eyes widened in surprise as You turned to face him, your voice barely above a whisper.
“Are you
 are you also a Jedi?” You asked, your voice full of uncertainty.
Cal’s face lit up with a smile, his green eyes sparkling with excitement and happiness.
“Yes, I am!” He exclaimed, voice full of joy. “I can’t believe I’ve finally found another Jedi!”
“Me too
” You whispered as the revelation sent a wave of relief washing over You. And sure enough, You felt his Force signature resonate around You, feeling his resilience, determination and a strong connection to the Light Side of the Force. However, while the signature carried traces of sorrow and grief, You were surprised by how warm and comforting it felt, enveloping You like a protective blanket. You were unable to remember the last time You felt someone’s Force signature—much less one as soothing. The feeling replaced your earlier apprehension with a sense of solidarity and companionship, relieved to know that You were not alone.
However, it still took time for You to feel comfortable around Cal, despite his warm demeanor and infectious enthusiasm. But slowly over time, You found yourself gradually opening up to the redhead, sharing stories of your past and your hopes for the future. Yet, a lingering sense of caution remained, a barrier that felt insurmountable at times.
But BD-1, Cal’s loyal droid friend, proved to be a source of comfort and solace during those moments of uncertainty. Seeing how happy Cal was once more, all because of your presence on board, BD-1 went out of his way to make You feel welcome with his cheerful chirps and friendly demeanour, offering You small gifts and gestures of kindness that never failed to bring a smile to your face.
And as You watched the little droid trot around the ship, trilling with excitement, You couldn’t help but feel a sense of gratitude towards him. His efforts to make You feel comfortable and at ease did not go unnoticed, and You found yourself growing fond of BD-1 in return.
Cal, too, noticed the bond that was forming between the both of you, and he couldn’t help but smile at the sight of his droid friend bringing joy and laughter into your life like he did for him. Seeing You happy lifted Cal’s spirits in ways he couldn’t fully explain, and he found himself opening up to You even more, sharing his hopes and fears with a newfound sense of trust and vulnerability.
Overall, BD-1’s efforts to make You feel comfortable and welcome were essential in helping You overcome your initial apprehension and form strong bonds of friendship with Cal and the droid. There were numerous instances which contributed to strengthening your bond with both of them.
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One day, Cal and BD-1 ventured out on a mission while You agreed to stay behind on the Mantis to look after it and to provide backup support if needed. But when the duo failed to return when they should have, a sense of worry began to settle deep in your mind. Especially when You were unable to contact them via the comms. Time appeared to stretch on endlessly as You waited for their return, each minute that passed only made your concern grow. Feeling restless, You paced the length of the ship, your footsteps echoing in the empty corridors as You anxiously awaited their safe return.
Finally, after what felt like an eternity, just when You contemplated going out to search for them, You heard footsteps and beeping sounds. You quickly rushed down the ramp to be greeted by the sight of Cal, looking a little worse for wear but otherwise unharmed. Your worries melted away in an instant as You ran over to greet him.
“Cal, you’re back!” You exclaimed, relief evident in your voice.
The redhead grinned wearily, his expression softened by your sight. “Hey
” He greeted, his voice tinged with exhaustion. “Sorry for the delay. We ran into a bit of trouble out there.”
Before You could respond, BD-1 chirped excitedly, leaping down from Cal's back and presented You with a tiny gift he ejected from his stim dispenser. With a delighted giggle, You accepted the gift, a simple trinket made from scavenged materials—a token of BD-1's affection and friendship.
As You thanked the little droid for the thoughtful gesture, Cal couldn't help but chuckle at the scene unfolding before him.
"Well, it looks like BeeDee gets all the attention," he quipped, his tone light-hearted as he approached you. "No warm welcome for a valiant hero like me, huh?"
You grinned at his playful remark, thankful that despite the dangers they faced on their mission, Cal and BD-1 had returned safely, and that was all that mattered in the end.
As you all walked back inside the Mantis together, Cal's arm draped casually over your shoulder, You couldn't help but feel a sense of belonging wash over You. And when BD-1 chirped happily beside You, You knew that no matter what challenges lay ahead, you would face them together as a team.
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Another day, You remember sitting alone in the quiet solitude of your quarters at the back of the Mantis. With the weight of loneliness and longing pressing heavy on your heart, You couldn't help but feel the ache of missing your long-gone family and friends. Memories of happier times filled your mind, each recollection a bittersweet reminder of the bonds You had lost to the war of the Galaxy.
Meanwhile, out in the common area of the ship, Cal paced back and forth with furrowed brows, his concern for You evident in the worried lines etched upon his face. He had sensed your melancholy from the moment You had withdrawn to your quarters, and despite his best efforts to coax You out of your seclusion, You had insisted that You were fine, not wanting to burden him with your troubles.
But BD-1, after sensing your distress, took it upon himself to cheer You up. With a soft chirp, the little droid scuttled into your quarters, carrying an assortment of gifts and trinkets.
You looked up when BD-1 dropped the presents at your feet, startled by the unexpected intrusion. But when You gazed into the droid’s photoreceptor lenses, You noticed something—empathy, compassion and a silent invitation to share in his company.
With a small smile, you reached out to accept the gifts that BD-1 had brought for You, each one a small token of friendship and comfort in the midst of your loneliness. A handcrafted charm bracelet, a bundle of aromatic herbs, and a holorecording of soothing music—all thoughtfully chosen to lift your spirits and ease the ache in your heart.
As You held the gifts close to your heart, a wave of gratitude washed over You, grateful for the droid’s unwavering support and companionship.
When Cal noticed BD-1 entering your quarters, he longed to join in as well, wanting to do everything he could to make You feel better and suddenly, an idea came to him. Quickly, he brewed a cup of your favorite caf, its rich aroma filling the air. With each measured step, he poured his heart into the simple act of preparing the beverage, hoping that it will bring You some solace in the midst of your turmoil.
As the redhead slowly walked into your quarters with the steaming cup in hand, he felt a sense of relief wash over him at the sight of the little droid’s offerings laid out before You on your bed. He was grateful for BD-1’s presence, knowing that the little droid was looking after You in his own unique way, offering You comfort when You needed it the most.
When You saw Cal enter your quarters with hesitant steps, You couldn’t help but feel a surge of warmth in your chest at the sight of him. The small, sympathetic smile he wore tugged at your heartstrings, and as You watched him walk closer, your lips curved into a small smile of your own.
Slowly, Cal extended the cup towards You, his gesture a silent offering of support and understanding. And as You accepted the cup of caf, You felt a sense of gratitude, knowing that with Cal and BD-1 present, You were never truly alone, even in your moments of solitude. Their presence and unwavering support filled the room with a comforting sense of companionship that eased the ache in your heart.
When Cal moved to leave You to your thoughts, as You had requested earlier, a sudden impulse seized You. “ Cal, wait!” You called out, surprising yourself with the words.
Turning back to face You, the redhead’s expression was one of curiosity, his eyes searching yours.
“Would you
 would you mind staying here for a while?” You asked, your voice soft with uncertainty. “I could use the company
”
A flicker of emotion passed through Cal’s eyes; a mixture of surprise, gratitude and something deeper You couldn’t quite recognise. With a small nod, he settled into the seat opposite You, his presence along with BD-1’s providing reassurance amidst your troubled thoughts.
And as you all sat together in the comfort of your quarters, the warmth of the caf and the gentle hum of conversation filled the air, slowly dissipating the tension from earlier. With each passing moment, You found yourself drawn deeper into the warmth of Cal’s presence, the sound of his deep voice soothing your worries.
As You listened to him speak, your gaze wandered, taking in the details of his appearance with a newfound appreciation. His fiery red hair, the brightest You had ever seen, seemed to glow in the soft light of the room.
His green eyes, so vibrant and full of life, sparkled with intelligence and kindness, drawing You in with their magnetic charm. And as You met his gaze, You found yourself captivated by the depth and warmth that lay within them, a reflection of the soul that resided behind those beautiful emerald orbs.
His freckles, scattered like constellations across his sun-kissed skin, added to his charm, giving him an air of boyish innocence that belied the immense strength and resilience he possessed. And though his face carried the marks of battles fought and hardships endured, each scar only served to enhance his rugged allure, a testament to the trials and tribulations he had overcome over the years.
While You took in the sight of him, bathed in the soft glow of the room, You couldn't help but feel a sense of awe and admiration wash over You. In that moment, surrounded by the comforting embrace of his presence, You knew that You were in the presence of someone truly special—a friend, a confidant, and perhaps something more.
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As time went on and the bond between You and the duo deepened, You developed a deep, almost parental affection for the little droid, despite not understanding what he said half the time. Often, in moments of excitement or tenderness, You found yourself affectionately calling BD-1 "Beebee" or "BB-1," much to Cal’s amusement.
During one particularly heartwarming moment by the campfire during a stop on Bogano, as Cal's hand brushed against yours and the stars twinkled overhead, You couldn't resist reaching out to BD-1 with a soft smile.
"Come here, Beebee," You cooed, beckoning the droid closer.
BD-1 chirped happily, nuzzling against your side with a warmth that made your heart swell.
Cal chuckled at the endearing nickname, his eyes crinkling with affection as he observed the exchange.
"You're my little bebe!" You exclaimed, unable to contain your adoration for the droid, causing Cal's laughter to fill the air, a melodic sound that echoed through the night.
"You're going to spoil him with all that love," he teased, his playful tone only adding to the warmth of the moment.
You grinned, feeling a sense of contentment wash over You. "Well, he deserves it," You replied, reaching out to pat BD-1's head affectionately.
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Another one of your adventures led you all to an enchanting night market, where the dim glow of colourful lanterns illuminated the bustling streets. Cloaked in hooded robes that disguised your identities, You and Cal strolled through the bustling streets and crowds of people. The outer rim planet that you all had landed on was far from the watchful eyes of the Empire, but the threat of being hunted down as Jedi still lingered, necessitating caution in your movements.
As you both moved through the sea of sellers and stalls, You couldn't help but steal glances at Cal, admiring how handsome and mysterious he looked in his black cloak.
Cal too stole glances at You from beneath his hood, unable to contain his admiration. The way your eyes sparkled with curiosity as You took in the sights and sounds around You, the delicate curve of your smile as You marveled at the many stalls— it all filled him with a warmth that he couldn't quite explain.
His thoughts drifted to uncharted territory as he found himself yearning for more than just companionship with You. The urge to reach out and hold You close, to feel the warmth of your embrace and the softness of your touch, tugged at his heartstrings with an intensity he hadn't anticipated.
But the redhead knew better than to act on such impulses, especially in the midst of such a perilous situation. The threat of danger loomed overhead, reminding him of the risks involved in allowing his emotions to take control. And yet, despite the rational voice of caution in his mind, he couldn't shake the longing that stirred within him whenever he looked at You.
And as You turned to face him with a curious expression, he felt a rush of warmth fill his chest, the desire to protect and cherish You overwhelming any doubts or fears that lingered within him. In that moment, surrounded by the hustle and bustle of the night market, Cal knew one thing for certain; he would do anything to keep You safe.
The redhead’s thoughts were interrupted when You suddenly rushed inside a bookstore with shelves full of interesting titles. Among them, a book on how to learn Binary stuck out, with a cover full of symbols and characters that attracted your interest.
"Hey, Cal, check this out!" You exclaimed, excitedly holding up the book after he caught up to You. "I've always wanted to learn Binary, especially now so I can understand Beebee better. What do you think?"
Cal glanced at the book, a smile tugging at the corners of his lips. "I think that's a great idea," he replied, his voice warm with encouragement. "Learning Binary could definitely help you and Beedee communicate more effectively."
Turning to BD-1, who was perched on Cal's shoulder, You addressed the droid with a playful grin. "What do you think, Beebee? You think I can learn Binary? Then you and I can gossip like schoolgirls, won't that be fun?"
Cal chuckled at your remark, his eyes twinkling with amusement. "I definitely think Beedee will have some juicy gossip to tell you," he quipped, eliciting a series of excited beeps from the droid. "But yeah, learning Binary sounds like a fantastic idea. Just promise me one thing: as long as you both don't gossip about me, I'm all for it."
You giggled in response before purchasing the book and tucking it safely into your robes. For some reason, You hadn’t thought to ask Cal for lessons, thinking You could learn on your own and not wanting to trouble him as he already had too much on his plate. But now, with the book in hand, You were eager to begin learning.
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After weeks turned to months aboard the Mantis, You received communication from a distant friend from within the rebellion You worked for, presenting You with a difficult choice. The holographic image flickered to life from within your now fixed comms unit, revealing the face of a trusted ally, their voice filled with urgency and determination as they extended an invitation for You to return to the rebellion.
For a moment, You felt torn, the call to duty and the desire to make a difference in the Galaxy making You feel conflicted. The rebellion was your way of fighting for freedom and justice alongside allies who shared your ideals and convictions.
But as You glanced around the familiar surroundings of the Mantis, the faces of Cal and BD-1 staring back at You with concern and uncertainty, You realised that this ship had become more than just a travelling vessel—it was your sanctuary, your home.
Cal, ever perceptive to the turmoil raging within You, approached with a gentle hand resting on your shoulder, his eyes filled with understanding and empathy. “Whatever you decide, know that we’re here for you,” he said, his voice soft and reassuring. “You’re a part of this crew, a part of this family, and we’ll support you no matter what.”
With a heavy heart, You weighed your options, torn between the duty to your cause and the love for your newfound family.
In the end, You made your decision, lead on by your stubborn sense of duty to the cause. The call to serve the rebellion beckoned with an undeniable urgency. In a way, You and Cal were very similar, feeling like you both needed to keep fighting, unable to shake the sense of duty that weight heavily on both of you.
Cal accepted your decision with great reluctance, having half a mind to join You but he had his own duty to fulfill for Saw Gerrera’s rebellion.
When the moment of your departure drew closer, Cal and BD-1 stood beside You as You gathered your meagre belongings, their expressions a mirror of your own conflicted emotions, as You prepared to leave. The duo knew that your absence would leave a void aboard the Mantis that would be difficult to fill.
Cal, ever stoic and composed, held his emotions in check, offering You a reassuring smile as he bid You farewell. His words of encouragement and support echoed in your ears, reminding You that You were not alone in your decision, no matter how difficult it may be.
BD-1 on the other hand, unable to contain his emotions, wailed and cried, clinging to your legs desperately as You attempted to walk down the ramp of the Mantis and onto the planet. The little droid’s cries of distress tore at your heartstrings, filling You with a sense of guilt and anguish as You struggled to pull away.
“Beebee, it’s okay,” You whispered, calling him with that endearing nickname, your voice thick with emotions as You tried to soothe the distraught droid. “I’ll come back, I promise. We’ll see eachother again soon.”
But BD-1’s cries only grew louder, his little legs clinging to You in a desperate embrace, refusing to let go. Tears welled in your eyes as You looked into the droid’s photoreceptors, seeing the depth of his sorrow reflected back at You.
As he watched BD-1 cling to You with such desperation, witnessing the droid’s anguish and your distress, Cal felt a pang of sorrow and longing grip his heart as well. He slowly approached you both, gently reaching out to the droid. “’We shouldn’t be doing this’,” he murmured softly, his voice laced with sorrow as he pried BD-1 away from You. “We must respect others’ decisions
”
The redhead wanted nothing more than to embrace You, to hold You close and offer You comfort in this difficult moment. But he knew that if he allowed himself to give in to that temptation, he would break down completely. With a heavy heart, Cal settled for a handshake instead, his touch gentle yet firm as he bid You farewell. He knew that letting You go was the right thing to do, even if it tore him apart inside.
With a heavy heart, your touch lingered on Cal’s hand before You gave BD-1 one last reassuring pat before finally stepping away and descending down the ramp. And as You walked away, the echoes of BD-1's cries followed You, a haunting reminder of the sacrifice You had made in the name of duty.
As your silhouette faded into the horizon, Cal couldn’t shake the weight of grief that settled in his chest. Watching you leave, he couldn't help but reflect on the bond that had formed between You, him and BD-1, realizing how much he and the little droid had come to cherish You.
In the short time You had been aboard the Mantis, You had become like family to them. And now, just as they had grown accustomed to your presence, You were leaving them, all too soon, like so many others before You.
The thought of saying goodbye was nearly unbearable, a painful reminder of the transience of life and the fleeting nature of companionship in a Galaxy ripped apart by conflict and suffering. But even as the pain of loss threatened to overwhelm him, Cal knew that he couldn't hold You back, knowing all too well that your duty to the rebellion was a call You could not ignore.
As Cal returned inside the Mantis, a heaviness settled upon him, weighing down his spirit with the burden of your departure. Unable to muster the resolve to fly the ship just yet, he found himself sinking into melancholy, the empty space around him echoing with the absence of your presence.
Sitting in the cockpit, Cal held BD-1 close to him, the little droid providing what comfort it could with its mechanical chirps and beeps. But even as he clung to BD-1, a sense of loneliness overcame him, a stark reminder of the void left behind by your absence.
"BeeDee," Cal murmured softly, his voice tinged with sadness. "We... We both really did come to love our new friend, didn't we?"
"Boo-woo..." BD-1 beeped in response, his photoreceptors dimming with sorrow as he nestled closer to the redhead. In that moment, as they sat together in the silent cockpit, Cal sought solace in the presence of his loyal droid.
BD-1 then emitted a flurry of hurried beeps, crying out to Cal with urgency, telling—demanding him to bring You back right this instant. Cal felt a pang of sadness grip his heart as the desperation in BD-1's cries mirrored his own inner turmoil, reminding him of the depth of the bond that had formed between him and You.
"We shouldn't be doing something like this..." Cal repeated solemnly, shaking his head as he recalled his earlier words when BD had clung to You. "We can't force someone like that..."
His voice was heavy with resignation, a reflection of the harsh reality they faced. Despite their wishes and desires, they couldn't force You to stay, no matter how much they wanted to. The decision was yours alone to make, and they had to respect that, no matter how difficult it may be.
BD-1 emitted a series of mournful beeps in response, his sorrow palpable as he nestled closer to Cal, seeking solace in his presence. Together, they sat in the quiet confines of the cockpit, grappling with the emptiness left behind by your departure, silently hoping that You will return to them one day.
Meanwhile, as the evening turned into night, You found yourself immersed in the routine of life within the rebellion's base once more, but the memory of leaving your newfound family behind weighed heavily on your mind. Amidst the chatter and activity of your fellow rebels, a sense of longing gnawed at your heart, aching for the companionship and camaraderie You had experienced aboard the Mantis.
In the quiet solitude of your old quarters, You unpacked your belongings, the Binary language book You had purchased a few weeks earlier catching your eye. The sight of it brought back precious memories, reminding You of the laughter, the warmth, and the sense of belonging You had felt with Cal and BD-1. In that moment, You realised with a pang of regret how big of a mistake You had made in leaving them behind.
With resolution burning within You, You made a spur-of-the-moment decision to return to the Mantis, hoping against hope that it wasn't too late. Racing through the dimly lit corridors of the rebellion's base, your heart pounded with anticipation as You hurried towards the landing pad where the ship was stationed.
As You approached, the silhouette of the Mantis came into view, bathed in the soft glow of moonlight. Relief washed over You as You realised despite the few hours that had passed since You had left, the ship was still there, almost as if waiting patiently for your return.
You ran up the ramp and inside the ship, your breath coming in ragged gasps as your gaze fell on the solemn figures of Cal and BD-1. For a brief moment, confusion flickered across their faces, but it quickly gave way to surprise and joy as they realised that You had returned.
BD-1 was the first to react, emitting a series of excited beeps as he rushed towards You. Tears welled up in your eyes as You knelt down to greet the little droid, wrapping your arms around his small frame in a tight embrace.
"I'm so sorry," You whispered tearfully. "I didn't mean to leave you. I didn't realise how much you both meant to me until I was gone."
BD-1 chirped softly in response, his photoreceptors gleaming with happiness as he nuzzled against You. Meanwhile, Cal approached slowly, his expression a mixture of relief and concern as he watched the emotional reunion unfold before him.
"Welcome back," he said softly, his voice tinged with emotion.
With BD-1 by your side as a reassuring presence, You rose from your embrace with the droid and turned to face Cal, the weight of your emotions spilling over as You threw your arms around him in a tight hug.
As You hugged Cal, your heart overflowing with emotion, he returned the embrace just as fervently, his strong arms enveloping You in a comforting hold.
"I'm so sorry, Cal," You whispered once more, your voice trembling. "I didn't mean to leave you both..."
Cal held You at arm's length, his gaze meeting yours with a mixture of relief and sincerity. "You mean a lot to us, you know," he said softly, his voice carrying the weight of his feelings. "We've come to rely on you, to count on you. And when you left..."
His voice trailed off, the unspoken words hanging heavy in the air. But before You could respond, BD-1 let out a series of joyful beeps, trotting over to nuzzle against You in his own display of affection.
The redhead grinned fondly at the droid before turning his attention back to You. "Beedee's right. You're not just a member of the crew," he continued, his words filled with warmth. "You're family. And we're just grateful to have you back where you belong."
Tears of gratitude flowed down your cheeks as You gazed at Cal, feeling the weight of his words sink in. In that moment, surrounded by the love and acceptance of your chosen family, You knew that You were exactly where You were meant to be.
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Your adventures continued, roaming the Galaxy with Cal and BD-1. Despite using your book to teach yourself Binary and spending more time with BD-1, your grasp of the language remained shaky at best, leading to frequent misunderstandings with your droid friend that often led to comical yet occasionally embarrassing moments.
During one very tense mission on a remote planet, BD-1 emitted a series of urgent beeps, which You interpreted as a call for action. Without hesitation, You activated the nearest control panel, thinking You were helping to disable a security system. But your actions did the opposite instead, triggering a blaring alarm and alerting nearby guards.
Cal chuckled softly at your mistake, but his amusement turned to concern when You misinterpreted BD-1's attempts at giving directions using the help of his holomap. Confused by the droid's beeps, You accidentally led the way into a dead-end corridor, much to Cal's bemusement.
"Oh, wrong turn
" You mumbled sheepishly, earning a sympathetic pat on the back from Cal.
As the mission progressed, so did your series of misunderstandings. At one point, BD-1 signaled for a left turn, but You mistook it for a right, resulting on a wild goose chase through a maze of corridors. Cal laughed good-naturedly as You backtracked, feeling slightly embarrassed but grateful— and very surprised—for his immense patience.
Later, during a small respite from missions, BD-1 chirped happily and nudged You, prompting You to offer the droid a sandwich You had just made.
Cal chuckled again, gently correcting your mistake. "He's asking for a power recharge, not a snack," he explained, suppressing a grin.
Blushing, You quickly helped BD-1 into the charging station, feeling a bit silly but grateful for the opportunity to learn.
As you three continued your journey, your misunderstandings with BD-1 became both more frequent and more amusing. One memorable incident during a mission on a remote outpost, BD-1 quickly warned You about a slippery surface ahead. However, You misinterpreted the droid's chirps as encouragement for a fun slide.
With a playful grin, You ran and launched yourself onto the surface, expecting a thrilling ride. Instead, your feet flew out from under You, and You landed with a loud thud that sent a cloud of dust into the air.
Cal rushed over, concern etched on his face, but as he helped You up and noticed You were fine except a few scrapes, his expression softened into a grin.
"You really need to work on your Binary," he teased, his eyes twinkling with mirth.
Blushing furiously, You burst out into laughter along with him, grateful for his good humor and unwavering support.
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One evening, as the three of you sat around a campfire beneath a blanket of stars, the flames casting flickering shadows across the campsite, You couldn't help but steal glances at Cal when he wasn't looking. His red hair, illuminated by the warm glow of the fire, appeared to shimmer like molten copper, framing his face in a halo of fiery strands.
His freckled cheeks, kissed by the suns of countless worlds, added a touch of youthful charm to his rugged features. And when he laughed, his eyes sparkled like twin galaxies, filled with a light that seemed to chase away the darkness.
But it wasn't just his appearance that captivated You—it was the effortless grace with which he moved, the strength and agility evident in every fluid motion. His muscular yet lithe physique reflected countless hours spent honing his skills, preparing for the challenges that lay ahead.
Lost in admiration, You found yourself drawn to him in ways You couldn't quite explain, feeling a sense of déjà vu during that moment as You admired him. And as You watched him tend to the fire, his movements sure and purposeful, You couldn't help but feel a flutter of excitement in your chest.
While the flames danced and crackled, Cal couldn't help but steal a glance at You as well when he thought You weren't looking. He felt a surge of gratitude and relief to have You there with him, especially after the rest of the Mantis crew had split, each going their separate ways.
In those quiet moments by the campfire, Cal's thoughts drifted to the challenges you had faced together so far—the battles fought and the bonds forged in the crucible of adversity. And through it all, You had stood by his side, a constant companion whose presence filled him with a sense of hope and purpose.
He also admired your determination to learn binary, your willingness to laugh at your own mistakes, and the genuine warmth and affection You showed towards BD-1. In your company, he found a sense of peace and belonging, something he hadn't felt since the fall of the Jedi Order.
Lost in his thoughts, the redhead couldn't help but feel a surge of affection for You, grateful for your unwavering support and companionship. And as he watched You, a smile tugged at the corners of his lips.
Cal's gaze remained on You longer than usual, a hint of something more lingering in his eyes. As the crackling of the fire filled the silence, he reached out to gently brush a stray strand of hair from your face, his touch sending a shiver down your spine.
"Are you alright?" he asked softly, his voice barely above a whisper.
Caught off guard by the intensity of his gaze, You nodded, unable to tear your eyes away from his.
"I... I think so," You stuttered, your heart racing in your chest.
In that moment, the world around You seemed to fade away, leaving only the two of you in the soft glow of the campfire. Without another word, Cal leaned in closer, his lips brushing against yours in a tender, hesitant kiss.
Time seemed to stand still as You melted into his embrace, the warmth of his touch sending sparks of electricity dancing across your skin. In that moment, nothing else mattered but the two of you, lost in the embrace of the night.
As You pulled away, breathless and flushed, Cal's eyes sparkled in their intensity, his calloused hand reaching out to intertwine with yours.
"I've been wanting to do that for a long time," he admitted, his voice filled with a mixture of longing and relief.
With a smile, You squeezed his hand, feeling a sense of peace settle over You. "Me too," You whispered, knowing that in that moment, You had found something worth fighting for amidst the chaos of the Galaxy.
As You and Cal continued to lovingly gaze into each other's eyes, soft little footsteps filled the air, accompanied by the joyous chirps of BD-1. However, in your post-kiss daze, You misinterpreted the droid's enthusiastic speech, thinking he was teasing You for being all googly-eyed over Cal.
"Beebee, not now," You whispered nervously, blushing furiously as You tried to compose yourself.
Cal laughed, his eyes sparkling with amusement as he gently nudged You. "I think BeeDee is just happy for us," he teased, his tone laced with affectionate amusement.
You shot him a sheepish grin, realising You mistook the little droid once again. "I guess I still have a lot to learn," You admitted.
Cal's teasing grin softened into a warm smile as he squeezed your hand. "Well, lucky for you, I'm an excellent teacher," he replied, his teasing tone hinting at something more than just language lessons.
You couldn't help but blush at the underlying implication of his words, a flutter of excitement dancing in your chest. You leaned in to kiss him once more and as the tender moment between You and Cal lingered, bathed in the soft glow of the campfire, BD-1’s lenses suddenly whirred to life, capturing the scene in a flash of light. Startled, You pulled away from the kiss, blinking in surprise as You turned to see the droid standing nearby, his photoreceptors zooming in and out as they focused on You and Cal with mechanical precision.
“BeeBee, what are you doing?” You asked, a mixture of amusement and curiosity apparent in your voice.
Cal chuckled softly, his arm still wrapped around You as he glanced at the small droid with a playful grin. “I think BeeDee wanted to capture the moment,” he explained, his eyes alight with amusement.
You couldn’t help but laugh at the unexpected gesture, feeling a rush of warmth fill your chest at the thought of having a memento of this special moment.
“Well, I guess we’ll have to thank BeeBee for the souvenir,” You replied, leaning into Cal’s embrace with a contented sigh, giggling when You heard the little droid let out an excited “Whoop!” in response.
You, Cal and BD-1 settled back into the quiet comfort of the night, the image captured by BD’s lenses served as a reminder of the bond You shared with the other Jedi—a bond formed from friendship and love.
As silence once again fell upon the campsite, You found yourself lost in a moment of quiet reflection. The memory of how Cal and BD-1 had found You, helping You escape from the stormtroopers, flooded your mind with a wave of gratitude. If it hadn't been for them, You might not be here, nestled in Cal's arms, sharing laughter and companionship under the starry sky.
With a sweet smile, You turned to Cal, the flickering flames casting shadows across his features. "You know," You began softly, "I often find myself thinking about that day when a Jedi and a droid came into my life. If it weren't for you, I don't know where I'd be now. Thank you, Cal, for everything."
Cal's gaze met yours, his expression tender and sincere. "You don't have to thank me," he replied gently. "I'm just grateful that we found each other. You've become a part of our family, and I wouldn't have it any other way."
His words warmed your heart, filling You with a sense of belonging that You had never known before. With a grateful nod, You leaned even further into his embrace, savoring the comfort and reassurance of his presence. In that moment, surrounded by the silence of the night, the warmth of Cal's love and the joyous chatter of BD-1, You knew that You were exactly where You were meant to be.
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delicatebarness · 6 months ago
Text
cry baby | chapter thirty
Summary: How does it end?
Warning: Duel POV. The tiniest mention of sex.
Word Count: 1471
Spotify Playlist | Support: Ko-FI
Series Masterlist | Previous Chapter | Epilogue
A/N: I can't believe this is almost the end. - Please feel free to leave feedback or let me know where and how you want the story to continue, this is just as much yours as mine. - B
Tags: @buckys0whore | @thezombieprostitute | @lanabuckybarnes | @mishkatelwarriorgoddess | @softieekayy | @noonespecial90 | @hello-therree | @randomawesomeperson102 | @whoreforbarnes | @thejutvtsupport | @somnorvos | @cjand10 | @plasticbottleholder | @birdenthusiastez | @am-3-thyst
Everything: @hallecarey1 | @pattiemac1 | @uhmellamoanna | @scraftsku35 | @ozwriterchick | @sapphirebarnes | @rach2602 | @thetorturedbuckydepartment | @mrsnikstan
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Bucky’s POV
The memory of you standing by the sketch of him lingered in Bucky’s mind, a haunting melody that he couldn’t shake. Your words echoed in his eyes: “For my entire life in this city– all I see is you.” It felt like a revelation as if he could see something shift in you at that moment. Yet, he was unsure how to process the emotions that stirred within him. 
Bucky decided to spend the day with Leah, taking her to a place that once brought him solace to help clear his mind. The lake was nestled away from the neon lights and the city’s hustle, a place the two of you had often retreated to. He thought bringing Leah there would help him find some clarity. 
The ride to the lake was quiet, nothing but the hum of the bike, and Bucky’s clouded thoughts. Leah noticed his distraction from the moment he picked her up, but she chose not to press him about it. He did wonder if she sensed the undercurrents of his unease, even though she seemed content. 
Just as he remembered it, the lake water shimmered under the late afternoon sun, and the trees whispered in the gentle breeze. Leading Leah to a secluded spot, the familiar surroundings tugged at his heart. 
Leah wandered around, taking in the scenery. Her eyes fell upon something carved into the bark of an old oak tree as she approached it. A curious smile played on his lips as she turned to Bucky. “Hey, Bucky
 come here!” she called out.
His heart skipped a beat when he recognized the tree she stood by. Your initials and his, intertwined and etched into the tree– a memory, a relic of your shared history.
“That’s adorable,” Leah said, her tone light but knowing as she gestured toward the markings. 
Sighing, Bucky ran a hand over his hair. “There’s something I need to tell you, Leah.” 
Her smile faded slightly as she looked at him expectantly, sensing the seriousness in his tone. 
Taking a deep breath, he gathered his courage. “I love her, Leah. I’ve tried to bury it, to move on, but I can’t.” 
Leah remained calm, almost resigned. “No way, I’d never would have guessed.”
Bewildered, Bucky looked at her meeting her gaze. “You knew?”
“Of course, I knew, dumbass,” she replied, amusement sparkling in her eyes. 
“Wait,” Bucky’s confusion deepened. “Why
 why did you stay all this time?”
Her expression softened, and affection flickered in her gaze. “Honestly, I was never looking for anything serious, and it was clear you weren’t either, not with anyone else anyway. Oh, and the sex was great.” 
He realized just how perceptive she had been all along and her honesty struck him. He thought he must have been a dumbass, thinking he could keep his feelings for you buried while being around Leah.
“I do care about you, Leah,” he began, his voice filling with regret. 
She smiled, understanding etched on her face. “I know.” 
The weight of unspoken truths settled between them as they stood in silence for a moment. The lake, the tree, your initials– all symbols of a past he couldn’t escape.
Leah’s gentle voice broke the silence. “You need to figure out what you want, Bucky. And I think you already know.” 
He nodded, his heart filled with mingling gratitude and sorrow. “Thank you, Leah. For everything.” 
“Hey, this isn’t a farewell speech, yet,” she chuckled softly. “We’ve still got plans with everyone at the bar later, remember?” 
“Shit,” Bucky laughed, the tension between them easing slightly. “You’re right, do you want to leave now, then?” 
As they rode back to the city, Bucky reflected on his gratitude for Leah’s understanding. A strange mixture of relief and anticipation coursed through him as he thought about a chance to confront his feelings. 
~
Cry Baby’s POV
The evening approached and you began to get ready to meet with everyone at the bar. You tried to push away the complicated feelings that surfaced whenever you thought about Bucky together with Leah as your phone buzzed with a text to confirm they’d be there.
When you arrived at the bar, your friends were gathered in the usual booth. A comforting, familiar atmosphere was created with laughter and music filling the air. Greeting everyone, you exchanged quick hugs and caught up on their latest news. 
While in mid-conversation with Sam, the door swung open, and Bucky walked in with Leah by his side. Your heart flipped at the sight of him, yet you tried to keep your composure steady and stay focused on your conversation.
Bucky’s gaze found yours almost in an instant, and for a moment, it was as if no one else in the world existed. A small, tentative smile tugged at his lips before Leah pulled him toward the group.
~
The night wore on as you tried to focus on your friends, yet your attention kept drifting over to Bucky. The easy way he interacted with Leah, the smiles they were sharing, every second felt like a dagger to your heart. Lost in your thoughts, you almost missed a particular moment that shattered your fragile composure. 
“Sweetheart,” the nickname used amid a casual conversation, snapped your thoughts back to reality. The word hit you like a punch to the guy as the realization that he wasn’t directing it to you, but instead to Leah. It felt like every memory you had of all the times he’s called you that flooded your mind, the term of endearment that had always been yours– The smallest piece of the connection you cherished. 
Your emotions began to boil over, and you couldn’t stay there any longer. You bolted from the booth without a word, rushing out of the bar. As if in sync with your turmoil, the night air was cold and damp, pouring raid as the sky opened up. 
The rain soaked through your clothes as reached the bikes lined up outside the bar. Each breath you took hitched with sobs, the chill of the rain mixed with the heat of your tears. The plan was crystal clear as the rest of the world blurred. You turned to see Bucky as his heavy footsteps approached you from behind. His face filled with concern, his eyes held an urgency that mirrored the storm within you.
“Hey, what’s wrong?” he asked, his voice gentle as he reached out, cupping your cheek in his hand. His touch was a warm contrast to the wet, cold rain. 
You struggled to find the right words, the rain began to mingle with your tears as they spilled down your cheeks. “I can’t sit in there and listen to you call her that,” you blurted out, your voice trembling as you finally looked up at him. “I know it sounds pathetic, but that’s been ours since we were kids, Bucky.” 
For a moment, Bucky’s eyes widened in shock but his hand stayed gently holding your cheek, smoothly rubbing his thumb against it. The only sound between you was the relentless patter of rain hitting the pavement, as he opened his mouth to speak, but nothing came. 
“I’m in love with you,” your words spilled out in a rush, the adrenaline that coursed through you drove it to admit the truth to him. “I’ve been in love with you for so long, and I can’t watch you be with someone else anymore–”
Before you could continue, Bucky’s lips met yours. The intensity takes your breath away. Everything around you seemed to disappear, there was only the two of you standing in the rain, together. The kiss was filled with years of unspoken emotions, everything you had been hiding.
His forehead rested against yours when he pulled back. His breath was warm as it mingled with your ragged breaths as he spoke. “I’m in love with you too,” he whispered, his voice trembling. “It’s always been you, I just
 I didn’t know you felt the same way.” 
Wrapping your arm around his neck, your tears mixed with the rain as you held him tightly. “I’m sorry I didn’t realize sooner,” you said, your voice choking on your emotions. “I, I, I,” you stuttered unable to find your voice again. 
He shook his head, placing another kiss against your lips. “It doesn’t matter now,” he murmured. “We know now, and that’s all that matters.” 
The rain continued to pour down, chilling you to the bone, but you couldn’t care. All that mattered in that moment was you were finally together, your hearts laid bare. 
The pain, the confusion, the fear– in that moment, you knew that everything you had been through had led to this. Standing together, Bucky by your side, you were ready to embrace whatever came next in the open road of the future.
---
Series Masterlist | Previous Chapter | Epilogue
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wcnderlnds · 17 days ago
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first date | peter maximoff headcanons
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ăƒ»â„ăƒ»summary: a series of headcanons of everyone’s favourite speedster on a first dateăƒ»â„ăƒ»warnings: n/aăƒ»â„ăƒ»authors note: this started out great and then I lost my way but I still wanted to post it anyway <3 if you want to be added to my tag list please fill this out!
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Asking you out would’ve been the easy part. Peter isn’t short of confidence so the second he realised he was catching feelings for you — something that didn’t happen very often for him — he’d make a move. It wouldn’t be anything grand. Maybe you’d been hanging out, trying to watch some movie but Peter had been talking all the way through it, occasionally stuffing Twinkies into his mouth. Through his talking, he’d casually drop “hey, so, want to go on a date or something?” Obviously, after the initial shock had wore off, your answer would be an immediate yes.
It was planning the actual date that was the hard part for him. Let’s be honest, Peter isn’t the most romantic guy on the planet. That paired with the fact he’d probably only been on three proper dates in his life (mostly opting for hook ups — fear of commitment say what) made it difficult. His first choice would have been the arcade but no. That was no place to take someone like you. You deserved much better for a first date. Luckily, the carnival was in town. Sure, he could’ve easily ran you to a different state or country to find one but he figured running across the world was at least a third date thing.
The day of the date is when the nerves would hit him but he’d hide it as best he could. As you walked around the carnival grounds marvelling at all the rides and games, Peter would be rubbing his sweaty palms on his shirt because there’s no way he’d ruin his jacket. When your hand did finally slip into his, he’d feel more at ease wondering why the hell he’d been so nervous anyway.
That was because he really liked you. It was evident in the way he determinedly tried to win you the biggest bear in the place. He stood throwing the balls, aiming for the cups. “We’re not leaving here until I’ve won you that giant ass bear, babe. That’s a promise.” And, he would. It’d take him only three games before he finally won you the thing. The smile on your face as he handed it over to you was worth trying a million times.
After you'd try out the rides, Peter would suggest grabbing a bite to eat. The guy is always hungry and the second he spotted the hot dog stand, he'd been dying to grab one. He'd find a spare bench for the two of you to eat and talk. This would be where you'd find out more about him. He'd tell you about his mom and sister -- how he was estranged from his dad (but he totally planned on telling him one day), how he first realised he was a mutant, his favourite video games, etc. And, in turn, you'd tell him all about yourself. He'd ask all the right questions, nodding along, chiming in when he could. Peter wasn't usually a good listener but when it came to you, he'd want to know anything and everything.
Peter would always have a hand touching you whether it was his hand in yours or his hand on the small of your back as you walked around, he liked knowing you were there. That you were with him. Maybe it was also to show off to anyone else that was eyeing you up, too. He was the one you had chosen, not them.
Internally, all through the night Peter would be trying to think of the perfect moment to kiss you. Did you even kiss on the first date? Would you even want to kiss him? There'd be times you'd have to knock him out of his thoughts. "Sorry, just got lost in how pretty you are."
When it came time to go, Peter would walk you home. It was one of the first times he'd want to go slow; savouring every second he got to spend with you.
The chill in the night air meant you'd probably be cold and Peter couldn't have that. He'd pull off his jacket, draping it over your shoulders. When you'd question if he was cold since he was no only in his Rush shirt, he'd wave you off. "Eh, I'll be fine. You're more important. How can I take you out again if you get sick?"
'This is it', he'd think to himself as you stood on the porch of your house. This was the moment he'd kiss you.
His eyes would flicker to your lips, his hand almost hesitantly resting on your hip to pull you close. "I had an awesome time tonight..." He'd pause for a moment, his cheeks reddening slightly. "I really want to kiss you right now."
"Then do it."
Peter didn't need telling twice, his lips would meet yours in a slow, gentle kiss. The taste of your lips intoxicating his senses, knowing damn well that he would easily get addicted to you.
Actually, he already was. There was no doubt in his mind that there'd be many more dates in the future.
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