#*snuffed ; ooc

[crownshattered]

|| Me, reading up on drow lore (specifically personality traits: Hmm, interesting... *drops it in the trash*

[blueheartedmayor]

Good morning again.

I am warning everyone now. I have been thinking of WKM!Damien. You may (or may not) know that I said that when he became the dark being after DAMIEN, Dante lost his humanity.

Well, I've been thinking about what precisely I mean by that (since it isn't just the literal meaning of being a human) and... let's just say the criminal charges put against him were actually acts of kindness (and being framed in one instance). Be prepared for feels.

[endawn]

unsure how exactly old he is / was if asked. spend two years in prison. roughly 20 / 21 when jailed and 22 / 23 when he escaped and pardoned. 25 / 26 when he dies post - crisis.

[dreamrcven]

the line "if i need your body; i'll fucking take it" along with listening to songs about revenge is really feeding into my whole craving for a villain AU for masuyo where she goes after data to kill him and use his body to revive miles

[rpvlix]

//definitely a decent part of the reason why Fous is the way he is is because in his youth his older siblings stole parts of him and he can barely remember who he was anymore.

[lowkeyerror]

Always, I'm With You

Yelena Belova x Reader

Word Count: 10k

Notes: Angst, Hurt/Comfort, fluff, FULL THUNDERBOLTS* SPOILERS, Happy Ending, mentions of torture, Hydra, cannon typical violence, possible ooc, (Tell me if I miss something I'll add it)

Summary: Your relationship with Yelena has been littered with challenges, but there isn't anything that you can't face together.

An: The summary is shit but I don't want to give too much away. So I implore you to trust me because I swear this delivers. Also its my civic duty to notify the masses that Ao3 is down rn.

Masterlist | Masterlist 2

Yelena had always been the optimist of your relationship. She was a beacon of light that was ever glowing. No matter the trauma she suffered, she held her chin high and kept a smile on her face.

She had pulled you out of the darkness more times than you could remember. Every time you began drowning in your past, she was there to remind you of the present. You were no longer alone, you’d never be alone again, because you had her.

You weren’t prepared for the day when her light was snuffed out. Life had already been so unnecessarily cruel to her, but you had never seen her broken like this. The universe put Natasha in her path for a tenth of a second. It gave her the family that she spent years chasing and then snatched it so ruthlessly.

When the blip happened, you were with her. One minute you were sitting on the counter watching her wash her face and the next she was gone. You were hysterical. The panic was instant, it felt like someone had a death grip on your heart.

The first thing you did was call Natasha. You rambled on the phone, incoherent to most, but Natasha had known why you were calling. How could she not, when she was watching the same thing happen to the people on the battlefield?

She got to you as quickly as she could. You weren’t in good shape when she got to you. In your mind you were ready. You needed to get justice, revenge, something that would fill the hole left by Yelena’s absence.

When what was left of the Avengers killed Thanos, you were there. You had felt how empty the act was. How meaningless it all felt. With your beacon of light gone nothing felt worth it anymore.

You wanted to go off on your own. Maybe just walk into the ocean never to be seen again, but Natasha wouldn’t allow it. She kept you close to her though for a long time you were useless, empty without Yelena in your life. You ached for her. You saw her everywhere you looked. She was on the couch with a bowl of mac and cheese, she was on the counter playing with her knife, she was in bed with her arms open for you to climb into. Then you’d blink and she’d be gone just as quick.

Your past became more haunting without her. You started to think about all of the sins you committed while you were brainwashed by Hydra. They had kidnapped you somewhere in the early 2000’s injecting you with their version of the super soldier serum. You did unthinkable things. Some you could never forgive yourself for. Yelena was the one to free you of the mind control. You’d stuck with her ever since then. She was the only person capable of making you feel like you weren’t a monster. Now she was gone. All your mind did was bounce between memories of her and your brainwashed past. It was a torturous loop that you couldn’t escape.

Natasha let you grieve. She didn’t pressure you to help her with hero work. She didn’t force you to come out of your room to socialize. All she wanted from you was to see you eat at least twice a day. She’d talk and you’d listen, not saying much back.

One day when you came down for dinner you saw her at the table with her head in her hands, a bottle of Russian vodka perched by her elbows. It was nearly half empty.

You sat across from her silently. She lifted her head up to look at you. Her eyes were bloodshot, but you couldn’t tell if it was from the alcohol or the tears.

“You two are so alike sometimes that it scares me.”

You can see Natasha morphing into her younger sister right before your eyes. There wasn’t a problem that vodka couldn’t outrun. At least that’s what Yelena said on her worst days.

“I miss her too, you know? I had- I just got her back,” more tears well in her eyes. “I found a family with the Avengers and now I have nothing left to show of it. Then right after I found the closest thing to blood relatives I have it gets stolen from me. There’s not a day that goes by that I’m not missing someone.”

You try to find some words of comfort, “I was never good at this, but your sister was. This hopeful glow that you couldn’t help but follow. She’d probably say something about not giving up so easily, it’d be a half-joke. Then she’d probably say something like the world will always need heroes like you. People that continuously sacrifice for the sake of humanity.”

“And are you a hero?”

Natasha shoots the question at you.

You reach for the bottle of vodka, taking a large swig, “I was whatever she needed me to be. Sometimes a hero, sometimes less than that, but never evil.”

“Malicious?”

You shrug, “On occasion.”

She laughs through her tears, “I’m glad she had you when I wasn’t around.”

You shake your head, “It’s the other way around. She taught me how to stay afloat. I leaned on her for support for so many things. Without her, I just feel myself falling into the void. How can anything I do be worth it, if she’s not here?”

She places her hand on top of yours, “I’m not going to give up until she’s back, until they’re all back.”

Natasha meant it. You could tell she believed with her entire being. She had never been an optimist, often grounded in unobjectionable truths. You couldn’t tell if it was desperation or just another way she had become like her sister.

You started being useful that day.

Rather than letting Natasha carry all of the weight and responsibility, you let her give some of it to you. You started thinking like her. You had to see Yelena again, you’d do whatever it took just to see her one more time.

When the opportunity to rewrite history came about, you were vexed that it appeared in the form of Scott Lang. He was annoying, but without him there wasn’t a chance the remaining Avengers would’ve reformed. Natasha had called upon them many times, but they’d only seemed to care about the big one.

“Natasha.”

You have this pit in your stomach that won’t go away. You aren’t fond of this plan, of everyone splitting up. Maybe you’d feel better if you were going with Natasha and Clint, but you weren’t.

“Y/n, I know-"

You don’t let her finish her sentence. You wrap your arms around her. You’re squeezing her tightly with your eyes shut.

“Be safe,” is what you say initially as you let go of her.

“I love you too, kid. If something happens…”

You shake your head, “No. You’re going to come back here, for Yelena.”

Natasha’s smile is bittersweet, “I will do what I can.”

You shake your head once again, “Not good enough. Promise me, promise me you’ll come back. We’re going to do this together. Nat, she has to come home to the both of us.”

She pulls you into her embrace again, she kisses the crown of your head, “I promise.”

She lied.

“Where is she?”

Clint couldn’t look you in the eye. He tossed the stone to Tony and tried to walk away. You grabbed him by the shoulder, so he was face to face with you.

“Clint,” your voice was stern.

You could see the tears welling in his eyes even though he avoided your gaze, “You have to trade a soul for the stone. I tried- I tried, but she was always better than me.”

Your grip on his shoulder only tightened as you felt your knees buckle. You refused to believe him, “She promised.”

Clint tried to hug you, but you shoved him away, “None of you would even be here without her. You all gave up, turned your back on the world. You took your ball and went home and now you’re here and she’s not. This is bullshit. You already owed her so much and she gave her life up for you pieces of shit.”

Bruce threw a bench, “We cared about her too.”

“Funny way of showing it,” you countered him.

The Hulk got in your face, the team tried to step between you two, “You wouldn’t like me when I’m angry.”

“I thought you were always angry,” you shot back at him.

“Now is not the time for this,” Steve interjected.

You scoffed, “Fuck off Steve. Yelena got blipped right in front of me. I thought I lost everything, but I still had Natasha. Now I don’t have either of them because of this stupid fucking team. I’m alone all over again.”

“We’re going to get Yelena back,” Tony chimed in.

You chuckled bitterly, tears now streaming down your face, “Fantastic, and the first thing I have to tell her is that her sister is gone forever. They had just found each other. Fuck.”

Your legs gave out from underneath you. Any arguments that you had stopped as sobs violently struck you. Your body folded in on itself.

The men stared at you, but Clint was the first one to move again. He wrapped his arms around you, but you didn’t shove him off this time. You allowed him to hold you. The only thing you managed to say was ‘she promised' over and over again.

When you couldn’t cry anymore, his grip didn’t falter.

“She told me that you have to be strong for Yelena like you were strong for her. She couldn’t have done this without you.”

“How can I do this without her?”

He was slow to stand, his hand stretched out, “You do it for her instead. Don’t let her sacrifice be for nothing.”

You took his hand.

In the midst of battle, sweat dripping down your dirt-stained face, you couldn’t help, but wonder if you’d die here. If you’d go out a hero, fighting against a mad titan’s army.

Somewhere between the 9th and 13th enemy you take down, you realize you can’t die. Yelena would come back to no one. Well she’d have Alexei, but would he be able to save her from herself?

When the portals opened, you felt a little relieved. Any help was welcomed in your mind. The people who disappeared were back, and you wondered if she was too.

It was somber when it was all said and done, but you didn’t need to stick around for a reunion.

“I can get you to her,” Stephen Strange offered.

You didn’t ask any questions, instead you gave him a curt nod. He opened a portal and you stepped right through.

The last time you were in this apartment, Natasha was basically dragging you out of it. Your protests fell on deaf ears as you tried to stay here. It wouldn’t have been good for you, surrounded by things that reminded you of Yelena.

You hear the rummaging around before you see her. Your heart thuds in your chest, and you curse your legs for not being able to move.

When she comes charging down the hallway. Your breath catches. Five long years, you’ve waited for this moment.

She almost doesn’t recognize you, pulling out her weapon. When she gets closer, she begins to analyze you.

Older, eyes more tired, new lines across your forehead, different hair. It was hard to tell with all the dirt and debris of battle all over you.

“Yelena.”

She can hear how broken you are. So she doesn’t stop you when you surge forward, holding onto her like she would vanish out of thin air.

You shake in her arms whispering against her skin, the same thing over and over, “I’m sorry.”

She backs away only enough to hold your face in her hands, “What happened?”

You attempt to take a deep breath, but wince. Yelena finds a cut on the side of your suit. Gently she presses it and you groan.

“Tell me after I patch you up.”

She drags you along, trying to pull you into the restroom. You stop outside and shake your head, “Bedroom.”

Yelena furrows her brows, but she grabs the first aid out of the bathroom, before following you to the bedroom.

The cut on your side is nastier than you would’ve thought. It takes her a while to tend to the wound. When she finished the cut is in a better state, but you aren’t. All you can do is stare at her.

She asks you to tell her again. You finally pull your eyes away from her’s, instead focusing on your hands. You tell her everything, from the moment she disappeared until now.

“My sister,” everything else seems of little importance to Yelena.

You can’t look at her, “I’m so sorry.”

She takes your hand, intertwining your fingers, “It’s not your fault.”

Your lip begins to quiver, “Stop.”

“Y/n, look at me.”

“I have to be strong,” you say it more to yourself than her.

“Detka, please,” Yelena pleads with you.

Your teary eyes meet her’s. It breaks you to see her like this. You open your arms, and she leans into your hold. She doesn’t care about the remnants of war all over you.

“We are stronger together.”

Your hands are on her stomach. She places her hands on top of yours, keeping you in place.

There are a million more things that you want to say to her. You want to tell her you missed her, that life without her was dull, that you were sorry you couldn’t save her sister, but you don’t. Instead your lips kiss the top of her head, lingering as you hold her. You hope it translates to something.

When she raises your conjoined hands to her lips to press a delicate kiss to the back of your hand, you know it does.

“I love you,” she says it first.

“I love you too.”

Neither of you attend Tony’s funeral. Instead you find yourselves in a small suburban town. You wish you could say that it was where they grew up, but you knew it wasn’t.

You both stare at her grave. Yelena gets close to the tombstone putting her head against it. She mutters something in Russian. You don’t fully understand it but you pick up a few key words.

She raises her volume for you to hear, “This is where we became sisters.”

“She was always thinking of you. I think it’s half of the reason she took me in when you were gone. The other half was because she was a good person. I think she kept some blonde in her hair for you. Being with her saved my life because sometimes when I looked at her I saw small pieces of you. I hope… I hope that sometimes she felt the same when she looked at me. It was a comfort I think we both needed. I didn’t know how similar you were until I found her nursing a bottle of vodka trying to drink away the pain, just like you do.”

She catches your gaze, locked as tears fall down your face, “I’m sure she did, because you are the best part of me.”

You disagree with her, “ You saved me.”

She stands to cup your face in her hands. You still have a few scrapes from the battle with Thanos. Her hands are cold against the skin of your face. She searches your eyes for something, she doesn’t find it. Her forehead rests against yours. Her breath mingles with yours and for a moment all the tears are forgotten.

“Why can’t you see that you saved me too?”

She kisses you, almost like it would break you. You relax into her, relishing in the way her lips feel against yours. It’s like breathing.

You waited 5 years to experience this again. This is your first kiss since returning. You both were in fragile states. You’d never rush Yelena into anything she didn’t want to do. In truth you could’ve kissed her the second you saw her, but you had too much to tell her then.

Your eyes stay closed even when your lips are no longer touching her’s.

“Sorry to interrupt such a touching moment.”

Your moment is over just like that. Yelena has an unimpressed look on her face as she turns her attention to the woman.

“What do you want Valentina?” Yelena’s voice is gruff as she speaks.

“I have a job for you. The both of you if you’re interested,” she flashes a Hollywood smile as she speaks.

Yelena’s jaw clenches, “How many times do I have to tell you that she doesn’t do this?”

You sigh, “What’s the job?”

Your girlfriend looks at you like you’ve grown a second head, “No.”

“If you think you’re going on your own, you’re mistaken,” you tell her.

She runs a hand through her hair, looking between you and Valentina. The sigh that leaves her lips is heavier than the one that had left yours, “You heard what she said.”

Valentina’s smile stretches even wider than it already was, “Wonderful, a couple of shadow agents.”

That's how you started working for Valentina.

There wasn’t any chance that you’d be letting Yelena out of your sight. Not with everything so fresh. You knew the kind of person she was.

She would throw herself into this work to numb herself from the pain. You couldn’t stop all of the hurt, but you could feel it with her. She’d do the same for you.

“Lena,” you call her name through the hotel you’re currently stationed at. “It took me a few stores, but I’ve got the boxed mac n cheese.”

There’s no answer. You feel a little panic start to set into your bones. You call her a few more times but you don’t get a response. Just when you’re about to start investigating every inch of the apartment, you find her.

She’s leaned against the bathtub, sitting on the floor. Her head hangs down letting you know she’s unconscious. The bottle of vodka in her hand is nearly half empty. There’s another one on the side of her that’s completely gone.

You crouch down to look at her. Your hand reaches to move some of her hair out of her face. She had cut it short since you reunited. You liked it, but that wasn’t surprising. There were minimal things you didn't like about her.

When you attempt to take the bottle from her hand Yelena wakes up. She goes on the offensive immediately trying to trap you against the wall. You slip from her grasp on your shoulders, slinking around her back, so that you can hug her from behind. She thrashes a little until you whisper in her ear.

“Lena, baby.”

She stops her movements. She nearly leans into you until something stops her. She rips herself out of your hold. She doesn’t look at you. The grip on the bottle tightens, “Sorry.”

She starts to march out of the room, but you don’t allow it. Instead of reaching for her, you set your sights on the bottle. She tries to fight you for it, but your grip is unrelenting.

“Let go.”

You take stern tone with her, “You don’t need it.”

“How are you going to tell me what I need?”

“Because I know you Yelena. Now give me the bottle,” you try to yank it from her hands.

“NO!”

She screams at you and throws the bottle in the corner of the bathroom. Glass shatters all over the white tile. Liquid spreads around the floor. Your eyes are wide, as you look at the scene. You look back to Yelena to find similar shock on her face.

She starts running and you chase after her. She books it out of the hotel. You follow her down the steps and out of the front. You can feel your heart pound in your ears as your feet slap against the concrete. You watch as she tries to loose you in the crowd.

Your eyes follow the trail she takes, but your legs carry you a different way. You’re going to cut her off. You push yourself, knowing that the blonde is faster than you.

When you round the corner her body collides with yours. She’s looking back to see if you’re behind her.

Your chest heaves up and down as you try to catch your breath. She doesn’t look at you, the anxiety clear on her face. You take her hand into yours, she flinches, but allows it.

You pull her away from the crowded street, into a private alleyway.

“I love you,” you start. “And nothing is going to change that. Not a thousands shards of glass on the floor and not a river of vodka.”

“I shouldn’t have done that,” she still refuses to look at you.

You nod, your lips briefly folding into your mouth, “You shouldn’t have, but I know you won’t do it again.”

“How can you possibly know that?”

“Like I said, I know you. That and… I think we both could benefit from going dry.”

She frowns, “Just because I can’t control myself, doesn’t mean you have to suffer too.”

“Lena you act like you haven’t found me in that same position a thousand times. If not with a bottle, then with a pipe. I know how you feel because I feel it too, but you’re not alone.”

She meets your eyes with a childlike hope burning though them. You can tell you’re getting through to her.

“I’m here. I will always be here,” you hold her gaze.

She crumples into your arms. You support her weight as she clutches onto your top. You can feel the dampness of her tears seeping through your shirt.

“Ya tebya lyublyu,” she whispers into the fabric of your clothing.

“I love you so much Yelena,” you rub soothing circles on her back.

She straightens up a little sniffing and wiping her eyes, “Ok, ok, I feel better now.”

You smile at her, “Good, because we have to go back to the hotel. I have boxed macaroni ready to be cooked.”

“With hot sauce?”

You kiss the side of her temple, “Of course I got the sauce.”

When you get back to the hotel the blonde wordlessly cleans up the mess she made in the bathroom. While she does that you cook the macaroni. By the time she’s done, so are you.

You make dumb jokes as you eat together. Lightening the mood exponentially. It’s something that’s bound to happen when the two of you are together. She’s your light and you’re finally beginning to understand you’re her’s too.

As much as you pressure Valentina to only send jobs that both of you can do, there are times where the woman doesn’t concede. Yelena was sent off to Malaysia, something about a lab. It wasn’t your mission so you didn’t know all of the details.

All you knew was that you had some anxieties about being apart. Things were better now, but there were still hard days.

Recently you could tell that something was bothering Yelena. She was keeping something from you. It only spiked your anxiety about her going on this mission alone. She wasn’t pulling away like she would’ve in the past, but she wasn’t letting you in.

It was a weird place to be in your relationship.

You check the time again, wondering when she would be home. You knew it would be late, but you predicted something earlier than this. It had been a few hours of you sitting on the couch of your home and waiting for her to walk through the door.

You had your fill of television and doom scrolling on the phone. All you want to do is cuddle in bed next to your girlfriend.

When she finally comes through the door, she leans her back against it while it’s closed. She stays there taking a few deep breaths, grounding herself. You watch her curiously, but let her have the moment.

When she opens her eyes, they land on you on the couch.

She smiles at you, “You didn’t have to wait for me dorogoy.”

You nod a few times, “I missed you, wanted to know you were safe.”

You walk over to her, she pulls you in for a chaste kiss, “I missed you too.”

The two of you make your way to the bedroom. You get in the bed while the Russian undresses.

“I thought you'd be home a while ago,” you say to her with no malice.

She freezes up a little, but doesn’t stop changing, “I made a little pit stop before coming home.”

You raise your eyebrow, “A pit stop?”

“You know a little errand before coming home,” she explains, climbing into bed.

“I know what a pit stop is Lena. Where’d you go?”

She mumbles an answer, but you don’t hear her.

“Yelena Fyodorovna Belova.”

She gasps, “Do not call me that.”

You scoff, “It’s your name, isn’t it?”

She squints her eyes, “I told you my middle name in confidence. Not so you could use it as ammunition.”

“Well, if you stop mumbling then I won’t resort to using it,” you counter.

She lets out an exasperated sigh, “Fine. I went to see Alexei.”

“Oh.”

She shakes her head, “This is why I didn’t want to tell you.”

“All I said was oh,” you defend.

“Because you hate my dad,” Yelena says it like it’s a fact.

“I don’t hate your dad.”

She sits up in the bed, crossing her arms, “You don’t?”

“No, I just hate how emotionally constipated and fixated on the past he is."

She throws her hands in the air, “So his whole personality?”

You change the subject, “How was seeing him?”

“I think you’re supposed to ask how he is doing first. If you are so keen about changing the topic.”

You let out a huff of annoyance, “How is he?”

She laughs, pulling you closer to her. Your head lies in her lap. Her fingers get tangled in your hair.

“He’s miserable, he misses being a hero.”

“Shocker,” you mutter under your breath.

“Now who is doing the mumbling?”

You smile up at her, “Sorry. Why’d you go see him anyway? It’s been like a year, hasn’t it?”

You see something in her demeanor change. She looks back down at you, “I was thinking of quitting.”

“Oh.”

She chuckles, “There you go with the ‘oh’ again. What does that even mean?”

You shrug, “Unexpected. I’m assuming he talked you out of it.”

“I asked Valentina for a more front facing role.”

“Oh.”

Yelena groans, “Can you please stop saying that?”

“Front facing like Natasha,” you ask, reaching up to cup her face.

“Yes.”

You trace the line of her jaw with your finger, “I’m proud of you.”

Yelena grabs your hand, placing a kiss on your palm, “Maybe you could join me.”

“Do I need to start powdering my nose? Do people still do that?” You joke.

Yelena rolls her eyes, “Your jokes remind me of my dad. Please stop.”

You pout, “My jokes are better than his.”

She kisses your wrist, “I’m serious though, would you do this with me?”

You move from your lying position to straddle the blonde’s waist. Your arms loosely hang on her shoulders. Her hands are planted on your hips.

You play with the hairs on the base of her neck, “I’d do anything with you, Lena. If you wanted to pull the stars from the sky, then I’d find a way to help you.”

“If I asked you to do that, you need to have me committed. I would be unwell to ask you such a thing.”

You stare at her blankly, “I’m trying to be romantic here.”

Yelena smirks at you, “Skill issue.”

You gasp, feigning offense, “You’ve never complained about my skill level before.”

Her faces scrunches up, “Get your head out of the gutter.”

You wiggle your eyebrows, “Trying to get my head between your-”

You don’t get to finish the sentence as Yelena attempts to toss you to your side of the bed. She doesn’t calculate it quite right and you end up on the floor.

You groan, “Ouch.”

She giggles at you looking over the edge of the bed, “It was an accident.”

You give her a sideways glance, “Sure it was. I can tell by the boisterous laughter.”

She offers you her hand, helping you get back in the bed. Once you’re in, she lays her head on your chest. You sling an arm around her.

“Do you think she'd be proud of me?”

She’s already drifting when she asks.

“More than you'd be able to comprehend,” you say, closing your eyes to follow in her footsteps.

You’re already awake when there’s a harsh banging on your front door. You’re waiting for Yelena to come back from her latest assignment. It was something with a vault and that was as much as you knew.

The banging startles you as it is unstopping. You pull your knife out immediately as you make your way to the door. You check the peephole and let out and irritated sigh. Yanking the door open, you stare at Alexei unimpressed.

He's wearing the red guardian costume.

“Hello Alexei.”

“Yelena is in danger.”

Those four words are all it takes for you to get into his raggedy limo.

You have your gear on, leg bouncing as you wish you would’ve opted on taking your car instead. The limo is big and flashy, easily noticeable. It’s also slow as shit.

Alexei fills you in about what he heard while driving Valentina. Your hands twitch as you picture yourself strangling the women.

“Why didn’t she send me too?”

Alexei’s incessant rambling almost stops in its track. His tone sobers up a bit, “She didn’t think you’d be a problem. If anything happened to Lena, she said you wouldn’t forgive yourself.”

You clench your fist together, “She’s right, but I’d kill her if anything happened to Yelena.”

Alexei lets out a laugh, “I knew I liked you when we first met.”

You roll your eyes, “Less laughing, more driving.”

He straightens up his posture, “We will find her.”

You’re trapped with the man for hours. The night shifts into day as worry starts to take over your system. He has just as much energy as when he was banging on your door.

It takes a minute, but you can notice that there is genuine concern under all of his semantics.

“Why did you come get me first? You could’ve left without me?”

He shook his head, “You are family. You care about her. I would not keep all of this glory for myself, when I know you want to save her as much as I do. That and I think she will be less mad if you are with me.”

His explanation makes you laugh to yourself, “Look who’s learning about their emotions.”

He keeps his attention on the road, “For her, I try.”

Once you’re far into the desert Alexei stops the car without warning. He gets out and starts screaming like a psycho before you even have the chance to stop him.

You hop out of the limo, pushing him in the chest, “Are you trying to let the entire world know that we’re here? What if there are enemies around?”

“Then we fight them. We are super soldiers, we can take them.”

You glare up at him, “Do not call me a super soldier.”

“You have serum in you, you are soldier. I don’t make rules,” he shrugs.

You shove him in the chest, “I’m serious. If you call me that again, I’ll drop you where you stand.”

He laughs in your face, “I like to see you try. I am red guardian, protector of-”

He doesn’t get to finish his sentence before you sweep his leg. He tumbles onto the ground with a heavy thud. You stand over him with a twinkle in your eyes.

“Fine, you’re not soldier. Happy now?”

You give him a tight-lipped smile, “Elated.”

You scan your surroundings, when you see three figures headed towards you. Reluctantly you help Alexei to his feet.

“See, you need to have faith in my plans,” he claps you on the back.

He begins to jog over, but you stop him, “I’ll jog. You bring the car.”

You waste no time sprinting in the direction of the figures. As they come more into focus, you pick up your speed.

When you’re in front of the three of them. You disregard the other two going straight for Yelena. You grab her by the face and start looking over her for injuries.

“Are you hurt? I’ll kill her, if you’re hurt.”

She grabs your arms, “I’m fine. How are you here right now?”

“Alexei brought me. He was driving Valentina and overheard her plan.”

You pull her into your embrace, squeezing her tightly. She senses the anxiety in the hug. Even though she would rather not let the other’s see, she keeps holding onto the hug.

“I’m right here,” she whispers so that only you can hear.

“I thought I lost you,” you tell her, freeing her from your hold.

She scoffs, “And leave you with Alexei? Absolutely not.”

“Y/n?”

“You have to be kidding me,” You say turning your attention to the man who called your name.

“Do you know her?” The woman with the Bristish accent asks the white man.

He nods, “All of us super-”

Yelena butts in, “She is not a super soldier. Do not call her that.”

He blinks at her, “Right, right, except she totally is. Winter Soldier level, super soldier created by Hydra. She might even be better than the Winter Soldier.”

“Shut up Walker, before I throw that shield through your head,” you feel your blood boiling.

“If this how you treat all your partners then I feel sorry for your girlfriend.”

You’re about to punch him, when Alexei honks his horn, signaling you all to get in his deathtrap of a limo. Ava drags Walker over first to create space between the two of you.

“You partnered with him?” Yelena asks before you get in.

“Valentina set us up on a few jobs together. That’s all.”

Yelena eyes go wide, “This is the egotistical maniac that you were talking about.”

You get in the limo, “Yep.”

“That makes a lot of sense.”

While you’re in the limo they fill you in about what happened at the vault. When they’re done Alexei fills them in on what he heard Valentina talking about. It’s a lot of information for everyone to process.

“So did Bob die or?”

“We don’t know,” Ava answers honestly.

You frown, “Poor guy.”

Yelena goes to comment, but that’s when she notices the trucks following behind you.

“We have company.”

The group springs into action trying to take out the vehicle, but it’s proving to be damn near indestructible. The back window of the limo gets shot out. Ava is shooting out of the window, but John quickly pulls her in once the fire begins to get too much.

“Doesn’t this thing go any faster?”

“I’m on it,” Alexei calls out, he steps on the gas, but you’re barely up to 55.

It’s then that the cars begin to get disarmed, one by one You’re not entirely relieved when you see who’s responsible for it, but at least Valentina’s guys are off of you.

“It’s Bucky!” John on the other hand is more enthusiastic.

The group starts cheering thinking they evaded, danger, but you know better. Bucky is a complex individual. You’re proven right when he shoots something at the limo causing the back to explode as you all tip up into the air and then crash onto the floor.

You find yourselves tied up on a plane, with the former Winter Soldier turned congressman looking over you. You all try to explain to him what happened, but he doesn’t believe you.

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

John drops the pretense, “It means you know me Bucky, so cut the shit and listen to what we’re trying to tell you.”

“Yeah, I know you John, and you made your choices. I know it’s been hard since Olivia left you and took your kid, but it’s still on you.”

John shuts up after that, but you don’t.

“That’s rich coming from you, Bucky. What happened to Steve again? Talk about people leaving, not only did he abandon his team when they needed him the most. He gets to live his happy ending while we all suffer. He gets to relive his glory days while we get relieve our nightmares.”

Your words shake him and you know it, but he just pushes past them.

“You’re all evidence in Valentina’s trial.”

You let out an annoyed groan, “From hydra agent to government puppet, what a change.”

He steps over to you calmly, “And what have you done since being free besides follow her around like a lost dog? Maybe she should collar you and call you Fanny.”

You stand, breaking the restraints he tied you in, “ I was being a goddamn hero. I’m one of the people that helped saved half of the universe. I’ve repented for what I’ve done and I’ve earned the right to my happy ending.”

“Did you earn it or did Natasha hand it to you?”

You push him. Hard.

His back slams against the wall of the plane. The sound echoed in the space. You feel yourself, losing control.

“And who scrubbed your ledger clean Winter Soldier?”

There’s an indent from where his metal arm braced for impact against the plane. He sucks his teeth, “You want to do this?”

“Do you?” You challenge him.

“Let’s go super soldier.”

He charges at you, but you side step his attack.

“Is now really the time for this?” Ava asks the rest of the group.

Walker shrugs, “Don’t know, but I’m rooting for Y/n.”

“Me too,” Alexei nods.

Ava shares a pleading look with Yelena. The blonde huffs in annoyance, “He shouldn’t have brought up my sister.”

“If they break the plane, we will die,” Ava deadpans.

Bucky takes your arm, and twists it behind your back. You throw your head back knocking him square in the nose. He releases the hold and you quickly turn to throw a fury of strikes his way. He dodges most of the punches but when you send a hard kick to his chest he stumbles backwards.

He holds his abdomen and you smirk at him. As he goes for the next attack his phone rings. You let him answer it. You all hear the person on the phone basically reiterate what you were saying.

“Bob?”

“BOB,” you all say in unison.

He looks at you, and then the rest. Before hanging up the phone. He starts with Ava’s restraints. You take initiative and break Yelena’s.

“How come you could break out of yours, I was pulling these with everything I had,” Walker comments when he’s freed.

You shrug, “Ask Hydra.”

Alexei chimes in, “Must be difference between real deal and knock off.”

Bucky rallies the team the best he can, not like they have much of a choice. You aren’t necessarily thrilled, but you do want to get your hands on Valentina. Yelena seems very keen on saving Bob. So that’s the plan. When you’re on the ground, you’re loaded into a van.

Alexei takes shotgun with Bucky, while the rest of you were loaded into the back. It’s quiet for a few minutes before Yelena starts talking about her weapons. Ava pulls out hers next, and then Walker. He asks about his helmet and it gets you to chuckle.

“What about you Y/n?”

“I have widow bites like Lena. Hunter blade, 9inch dagger, throwing knives, retractable knuckle blade,” you show off some of your knives.

“No gun?” Ava comments.

You shake your head, “Don’t need it.”

“And if you did?” Walker questions.

Yelena answers for you, “Then I have an extra for her, but I can guarantee you that she doesn’t need one.”

“Well aren’t you two adorable,” Ava gushes.

You grow bashful at her words.

“How long have you been together?” Walker questions.

You tilt your head to the side a bit, “We met at the tail end of 2016. Got together like beginning of February 2017. Then we’re together until Thanos happens. Lena got blipped. I obviously wasn’t moving on but I can’t say we were together. Then from when the blip was over until now, we’ve been together. So 5 years, but also like 10 years.”

“And no ring?” Ava teases and it makes you blush even harder.

“I- we’ve been busy.”

Yelena takes over, “We've never really talked about marriage. The whole shadow operative thing kind of gets in the way of that.”

John looks at you both incredulously, “Have you ever heard of eloping? What kind of couple is together for 5 years and hasn’t talked about marriage.”

“I knew from the moment we got together, that I’d spend the rest of my life with her. There was nothing to talk about. I’ve never questioned it,” you answer him honestly.

Her hand slides into yours, “Me too. Marriage or no marriage, she is stuck with me.”

John pretends to barf, “Disgustingly cute.”

You lean your head against her shoulder, “She’s my everything.”

Yelena doesn’t shy from the PDA, she kisses the crown of your head. You relishes in the moments, knowing that in just a few short minutes it would be over.

It’s sudden when you feel the van crash into a building. As soon as you hop out, you begin fighting. The group goes to work almost resembling a team as you fight the people in the lobby.

When Valentina’s voice rings out from the intercom the fighting comes to a halt. You all pile into an elevator up to her office. When it dings you are in a very open room. Valentina stands alone, like she had been waiting for you.

Bucky takes the lead. He tells her that it's all over that she has lost. With all of her loose ends in this room, she’d be going away for a long time. Yelena asks her about Bob, but Valentina ignores her.

“Are you still ready for your close up, Yelena?”

“Eat shit Valentina,” she responds unamused.

Bucky gets in her space as she sets her drink down. He goes to grab her, but something stops him.

“I’m not alone,” you can hear the smile in her voice.

Aa blonde man emerges from the stairs. He’s wearing a golden suit with a big ‘S’ on the waist line. A blue cape flows behind him as he makes his descent.

“Hey guys,” he says it casually.

“Bob what happened to you?” Yelena sounds utterly crushed.

Valentina answers for him. She calls him the Sentry and explains that he will be disposing of your little rag tag group. She calls him Earth’s Mightiest hero.

“I’m not going to let you erase them from history,” you step forward.

The Sentry blocks your path, “I don’t want to fight you guys. How about you just turn yourselves in.”

Valentina scoffs, “The Avengers aren’t coming back Y/n. Natasha isn’t coming back. It’s time for you to move on.”

“Enough talking, let’s fight,” Alexei charges the Sentry.

The fight begins. Everyone springs on their own individual attacks on the blonde man, but it doesn’t last. He disarms Ava and Walker first. Then he throws Alexei out of the window before dragging the man back in just to toss him aside.

Meanwhile Yelena is trying to keep the peace. You hold back listening to her pleas. She looks at you, turmoil on her face.

“I’m with you,” you tell her.

She nods before going for Sentry. She gets on his shoulders trying to choke him out. She pleads with him from the position, “Bob, stop.”

He slings her off. You’re going to attack him right then but Bucky puts a hand on your chest. He stares at the blonde, before taking one of his shirts off.

He goes for Bob, activating the part of him that he can’t forget. That same demon that lives inside of you.

Sentry blocks every attempt of contact, eventually grabbing hold of Bucky’s metal arm. While he has his grip on Bucky you move in throwing your strongest punch at his chest.

The force has the Sentry sliding back, taking Bucky’s arm with him. It’s not terribly far back, but it’s something. You don’t get a chance to follow it up, before you feel a vibranium arm knock you across the face. You go sliding with the others.

He tosses Bucky’s arm to the floor. Ava scrambles to grab it an you all pile back into the elevator, retreat the only thing on your minds.

When they get out of the building the arguing starts immediately. There’s a bunch of accusations and finger pointing going around.

All you can focus on is the look on Yelena’s face you reach for her, but she pulls away from you.

“Oh my god stop. There is no us. There is no we. Bob changed into that thing and there’s nothing any of you can do about it.”

Ava goes against her, “And what did you do exactly? I seem to remember you getting your ass beat way more than mine.”

“Yeah, yeah I suck. I’m terrible. We’re all terrible. Ava you’re not a hero, you’re not even a good person,” her arms are moving wildly as she speaks.

“Bitch,” Ava relents.

Alexei intervenes, “Slow down amishka.”

Yelena cuts him off, “Alexei, I am not your amishka. I haven’t heard from you or seen you in a year.”

John tries to de-escalate the situation, “Go easy on him.”

She whips her head around to him, “Oh so you're nice now?”

“It’s my turn?”

“No, you know you’re a piece of trash Walker. So does your family.”

He doesn’t have a comeback, “Jesus.”

She throws her hands up, “We’re all losers and we lost.”

She starts to walk off. The rest of them look at you, expecting you to say something. All you do is sigh, and start to walk after your girl.

Alexei follows after you, “Let me try.”

Against your better judgement, you let him go ahead of you. You keep a steady pace as he runs to catch up with Yelena.

“Oh my god stop. If you cared you would’ve called. I would’ve heard from you.”

He stares at her, with sorrow in his eyes.

Her eyes water and her voice breaks, “I lost my sister again, but forever. And you disappeared.”

“I’m sorry. I don't know how to do this. I’m not good at it,” he steps towards her.

“Papa it’s all just too heavy. All I do is sit and scroll on my phone and think about all of the terrible things that I’ve done. Even with an attentive partner I just feel like a burden. She works like this because I work like this. I can’t handle my drinks, so she doesn't drink. All I do is take up space.”

Alexei looks back at you.

“I didn’t think you needed me,” he answered.

“I did.”

He nods, “I see that. I’m late but I'm here now.”

You walk past Alexei, right up to Yelena. You take both her hands in yours. She doesn’t pull away like she did before.

“I don’t care about the work. I don’t care about the drinking. Yelena the only thing I care about is you. If you feel empty, baby I’ll do whatever it takes, for however long it takes, to make you feel something more. It’ll never be a burden to me because I love you. My love for you is the only thing in my entire life that has never felt like a burden. Not when you were sad, not when you were drunk, not even when you were gone. It keeps me strong, you keep me strong. I like it when you take up space because it means you feel comfortable and I always want that for you.”

You don’t break eye contact. You need her to feel what you’re saying, to believe it.

“Lena, I’m here always.”

That’s all it takes for her to pull you into a kiss. It feels like understanding. The way her lips fit with yours, makes you hopeful that you got through to her. Her forehead rests against yours when it’s over, “I love you.”

You smile, “I love you too.”

Alexei breaks up the moment by engulfing the two of you in a hug.

“Perfect family dynamic. Very healthy and happy,” he boasts.

It’s then that you notice people around you looking into the sky. You step from under the terrace, to see what they’re seeing. There’s a dark shadow floating in the sky. It sort of resembles…

“Bob,” it comes off of her lips as a whisper.

You look around, and people are vanishing out of thin air. The citizens begin to panic, you all spring into action.

Rubble falls from the buildings above when Sentry flings a plane into one. You move to punch through it before it lands on anyone.

Alexei and Yelena are working together to move others out of harms way.

It’s like you’re fighting Thanos again, but this time the field is full of civilians.

You help free a man from his car after the rubble blocks him in. You’re constantly surveying the area looking for to get people off of the streets.

You see Walker struggling to hold the weight of a massive piece of rubble. Your makeshift group attempting to help him. Part of you wants to laugh at their struggles, three super soldiers vs big concrete.

You’re quick to join them, taking a spot next to Yelena. You put one hand on the rubble and give it a little shove. It almost instantly topples over. They all look at you and you fight the urge to flex in front of the crowd.

The citizens around you start to clap. It’s unlike anything you ever experienced. It puts warmth in your chest.

The celebration doesn’t last long as Alexei uses his body to protect a little girl from falling debris. As he checks in with her to tell her she’s safe she vanishes right in front of him.

You don’t hold back your gasps. You feel your heart pounding in your chest, but you don’t have time to panic. The people need to be evacuated from the streets. You can feel the impending horror as you watch more and more people vanish. You’re helping herd people into a building when you realize Yelena is not with you.

Alexei calls out to her, “Yelena!”

That’s when you see her at the edge of the shadows, talking to the Sentry. If she’s heard him you can’t tell. Your legs start carrying you towards her.

“YELENA!” Your voice booms in the empty streets.

She looks back briefly. Her eyes meet yours. It feels like an eternity yet, she takes a step into the void.

You scream, you scream like your heart has been pulled from your chest.

“No, no, no, no, no, no,” you start to blink rapidly, hoping that what you saw was a vision.

There are tears streaming down your face. You could feel people trying to hold you back, when all you want to do is run head first into the darkness.

“I can’t, not again. I can’t,” you’re hysterical, but your feet are planted.

You can’t move back. Last time she disappeared you couldn’t do anything about it. You’d lost 5 years, but this time was different. You could step into that void and chase after her.

“Y/n come on,” Bucky tries but you shrug him off.

You push them all away, “I am not losing her again!”

You stare up at the dark mass floating in the sky. He looks down at you curiously.

“I can make it all go away. All of your pain, all of your suffering.”

“You can’t and I don’t want you to,” you take step closer to the dark edge. “I will save Yelena, but I’m going to save you too Bob.”

You step into the darkness.

“We will continue until you break through the stone.”

You freeze at the voice.

“I can’t it’s too hard,” you recognize your own voice, begging.

“I didn’t ask what you could do. I said you will keep punching until you can break through the stone. Now punch.”

They had pulled you off the streets about a month ago, injected you with the serum. You were around 11. The fact that the serum alone didn’t kill you made it a success.

You knew what would happen next. The younger version of you punched the block of concrete over and over and over again. Even after you broke your hand, the cement barely gave.

When you hear the bones in your hands break, you try to intervene. You place your hand between the younger version of yourself and the target.

“Enough,” you mutter staring at yourself.

“It doesn’t work like that here,” the child's eyes are blank.

She sweeps your leg to take you down and begins to climb on top of you, punching you repeatedly. The broken hand doesn’t stop her.

You grab it and it’s as if the scene resets. You’re on your back watching the younger version of yourself punch the concrete again.

You stand, looking for a way out of the room. You see a metal door bolted shut. Without hesitation you begin slamming your shoulder against it.

The timing begins to line up with the sound of your younger self punch the concrete. You don’t take any solace in knowing that eventually the concrete does break.

With that thought at the front of your mind the steel door falls off its hinges and rush into what you believe to be an open hall.

It’s only when you’re fully inside that you realize it’s not a hallway. It’s a bathroom.

You can tell by the cracks in the porcelain sink that it is the day after Yelena was blipped. Shards of the mirror are scattered inside of it. The younger version of yourself has one hand gripping the sink and another on a gun.

Her head is down and her body is tense.

That day you had slammed your hand against the mirror and instantly felt stupid. You held the sink so hard it cracked. It had been less than 24 hours without her and you were falling apart. You remember the feeling of gun against your skull.

You pulled the trigger, but it wasn’t loaded. You kept pulling it, wishing you could leave all of this behind.

The illusion of you begins to sob as the gun falls from her hand. She crumples onto the floor, head in her hands.

You walk over to pick up the gun. Your hand rests on top of her head, stroking the hair calmly.

“She will come back to us,” you say as you aim the gun at the ceiling.

You shoot and the room moves, allowing you to crawl through the opening.

“Where is she?”

Clint couldn’t look you in the eye. He tossed the stone to Tony and tried to walk away. You grabbed him by the shoulder, so he was face to face with you.

“Clint,” your voice was stern.

You walked past the scene. This is moment in life when you thought you’d never have anything worth loving again. Yelena was gone, Natasha was gone, all you had was your past. All the wrongs you did, all the mistakes you made, all the people you’d kill. You felt hopeless.

That isn’t the case anymore. Yelena is here, you won this war. You got her back not only for yourself, but for Natasha.

You will find Yelena, there is not a doubt in your mind. You are certain, hopeful even. No matter how many traumas you have to go through, seeing her at the end makes it all worth it.

In the glass window of the building, you can see what looks like an old attic. It’s not something from your memories, but you know it doesn’t belong here.

You put your hand into the window first, watching it disappear, then your body follows it. There’s chaos around as furniture flies at you. You are able to dodge the stray pillows that are coming right for your head.

Then it all stops. The rest of the team has found their way here as well. It fills you with relief to know that you don’t have to do this alone.

“What did you see? Are you ok?”

Walker answers first, “Oh I’m fine.

Then Bucky, “I have a great past.”

Then Ava, “Totally fine.”

Yelena turns her attention to you. She’s waiting for you to say something.

“That fucking sucked,” you let out a broken laugh at the end of it.

“Well at least we’re all together now,” Ava finds the silver lining.

“Thanks guys,” Bob says.

You can’t help but size him up a little. He’s different than when you saw him in Valentina’s office. He seems a little shy, buy there’s a kindness that’s clearly on his face. You know that he essentially sacrificed himself to help these strangers escape. He probably saved your girlfriend’s life.

This isn’t the guy in the gold suit with dyed blonde hair, it’s not the dark ominous cloud terrorizing New York, this is Bob. A real man with intense emotions that can sometimes overtake him. He deserves to be saved.

So that’s what you do. You fight through Bob’s most painful memories. From his abusive parents to his drug induced psychosis, all the up to the moment the Void was created.

The Void pins everyone down except for Bob. You’re against the floor with a table pushing down on to your legs. You watch as Bob goes up against the physical embodiment of his darkness. For a moment you think he’s winning, until you see the shadow climb up his pant leg.

“Bob, this is what it wants you have to stop,” you call out to him.

It falls on deaf ears as he throws punch after punch to the Void.

You glance over at Yelena, who is trapped against a door next to Alexei. You use all of the strength that you have to get the table off your legs. Your steps are making dents in floor as you walk over to them.

Alexei tries to create enough space for Yelena to slip out. You extend your hand towards her and she grabs it.

“Trust me,” she says.

You nod, “Always.”

She signals for you to fling her across the room. You do it with no hesitation. You’re not too far behind her, though you feel the Void trying to create distance between Bob and the rest of the team.

Yelena gets to him first, wrapping her arms around the man. You are on the other side of him, squeezing him with all that you have. Soon the rest break free from their confines and join in to make Bob feel less alone.

Then suddenly it’s all over.

You’re back in New York, sprawled out on the floor. You let out a breath that you didn’t know you were holding.

You kept close to Bob, partially enjoying the comfort. Yelena’s gets up first, extending her hand towards you. You allow her to pull you up.

She doesn’t get to say anything before you’re kissing her. You hold her face in your hands as your lips move against hers delicately. It’s a fragile kiss, something like the one you first shared.

“I thought I lost you again.”

Her lips touch yours once more, “I will always be here.”

“We still have one last thing to deal with guys,” Bucky says as he gets his eyes on Valentina.

You can’t stop yourself from throwing a small knife in her direction. You miss, but it's on purpose.

“We get to kill her right?” Alexei comments as you all zero in on the woman.

“Alright guys, I know we’re going through a lot of feelings right now. Just give me half second,” Valentina holds her hands up as she backs away.

“Oh I'd like to kill her,” Ava says gleefully.

Bucky shakes his head, “We’re taking her in.”

You see Bob hanging behind a bit. You place your hand on his shoulder, “Come on.”

“Me too?”

You flash him a small smile, “From now on we stick together.”

He returns the gesture, “That’s nice.”

The two of you are the last to walk through the curtain. There’s press everywhere. Cameras flash pictures of all you standing behind Valentina.

Bob stands off to the side with Valentina’s assistant while you stand next to Yelena.

You lean over to whisper in her ear, “What the fuck is she doing?”

“Saving her own ass.”

Valentina turns to look at the group with her arms wide, “Ladies and gentlemen, without further ado, meet the new Avengers.”

There are alarms going off in your head as she says that. The press’s cameras flash more frequently, as soon as she makes that announcement.

“Is this real?”

Walker claps a hand down on your shoulder, “Feels pretty real to me."

Your eyes cut over to Yelena, who says something to Valentina before taking a step back. You move to stand next to her.

“Front facing looks good on you,” you smirk at her.

She gives you a once over, “I could say the same about you.”

“So what now?” Ava asks the team.

Bucky speaks up, “You guys like shawarma?”

Alexei laughs happily, “I love shawarma."

“I could eat,” Walker replies.

Bob agrees, “Me too. Kind of starving actually.”

You sling your arm around Yelena’s waist, “I guess we’re getting shawarma then.”

You keep her close as you walk away from the press. The team follows Bucky’s lead and you end up back in a van.

Yelena’s head rests against your shoulder during the car ride. The rest of your companions chatter, filling the silence.

“Do you want to elope?” Yelena say so that only you can hear.

“Your last name is cooler than mine, so I guess it only makes sense,” you reply.

“What does that have to do with anything?”

You roll your eyes, “It’s just a creative way of saying yes. Is fun no longer allowed, because we’re Avengers?”

“You have a weird idea of fun.”

You kiss her forehead, “Yet you still asked me to marry you, checkmate.”

“Whatever,” she buries her head further into your neck.

“I love you,” you say as you begin to rest your eyes, exhaustion finally taking over.

“I love you too."

[comatosebunny09]

one in the head, two in the chest | sylus

— summary: the universe had a shitty way of reminding you of your place. — cw: headcanon format, character death, reader is not mc, written with female reader in mind, profanity, mentions of alcohol, blood & injury, sex mention, self-destructive behavior, jealousy, mutual pining, unrequited feelings, melodramatic af, ooc, mdni — notes: is it bad i’m laughing ‘cause @alfredosaws had me singing the chorus for “you give love a bad name” while writing this? listen, don’t judge me i needed to get this out, okay? thank you for reading this dramatic dribble. — now playing: riverside - agnes obel bullet to the heart - jackson wang

It was a partnership of convenience. A mutual agreement.

The terms were simple: Sylus offered you protection, a renewed sense of purpose, and redemption. You handled his opposition, luring them from the shadows and snuffing them out like a candle’s flame. 

You performed at his clubs while moonlighting as an assassin. His right hand. His femme fatale. The perfect cover. 

You also made money for him, attracting new clientele. It was a win-win.

You struck fear into anyone who would dare sully his name while he got to keep his hands clean.

He never badgered you about your past, and you never pried into his.

The arrangement was flawless. Until it wasn’t.

You didn’t bank on falling for him. 

There was no singular moment. No ‘aha!’ No record scratch in a romcom where you, the protagonist, realized, ‘This guy’s got my heart in a bind.’

No.

It was a culmination of things. A gradual descent into irrevocable madness. It was terrifying, like sinking into the depths of a murky sea, only you weren’t thrashing about as water filled your lungs.

Not at first.

You feared letting him down. Feared his rejection and disrupting the lifestyle you had grown so accustomed to. 

It was comfortable, the hodgepodge life you constructed with him, the twins, and Mephisto. 

You had his back, and he had yours. You were Bonnie and Clyde. You shit-talked and flirted, but it was harmless. 

Initially.  

Sometimes, the flirting was accompanied by lingering gazes, accidental touches, and lasting smiles that held a little too much yearning.

His treatment towards you didn’t help matters. 

He gave you free rein of his mansion. Gave you the codes to his safe houses around the city, his armories. Bought you expensive clothes and intricate costumes to wear when you performed at his clubs. 

Cars, jewelry, property. You named it, and Sylus gave it to you. 

He held you a little too possessively when you accompanied him to galas and banquets. Never corrected the other guests when they referred to you as ‘his lady.’

Anyone go to his nightclubs specifically requesting you? ‘No. Not this one. Choose someone else.’

He often summoned you to his quarters following your missions to tend to your injuries personally. 

Even let you fall into his bed when he filled you with too much wine over dinner at the mansion or when it was too cold to sleep alone.

Nothing ever happened, much to your dismay. He was always such an insufferable fucking gentleman. 

Your relationship was far beyond that of employer and employee. Yet you dreaded labeling it, fearing your dynamic would shift for the worst if he knew how you felt about him. You weren’t allowed to feel things for him.

One day, you’d become a liability he couldn’t afford to keep around. 

But he was so fucking nice to you. Showed you kindness and temperance in a fast-paced and vapid world. You didn’t deserve this warmth, but you didn’t want to let it go.

You didn’t have to run anymore. Didn’t have to jump from city to city, changing your name, hiding behind your glamor. 

He offered you security, safety, and predictability, where you didn’t know if tomorrow would be your last day on Earth. 

He coddled your need for independence. Wasn’t stifling or controlling, but he was your security blanket in case you needed him.

He showed you fleeting tenderness that gave you a glimmer of hope that maybe…

Just maybe he pined for you as much as you pined for him.

But you’d never admit it aloud, content with staying at his side, paying off an unspoken debt, even as your heart squeezed each time he showed you a flicker of affection.

Enter Little. Miss. Dazzling. Charming. Irresistible. Hunter.

She swept in like a whirlwind, turning your life upside down on its axis. 

He forced her on you. Never explained the intricacies of their relationship, just that she owed him a debt, and he brought her around to collect on it.

You unwillingly became her guardian, tasked with showing her the ropes and dragging her on missions or to meetings.

You hated the arrangement at first. She was all bright-eyed, smiling, and optimistic. Reckless. Strong-headed. In some ways, she was like you. A reflection of the woman you were years before the world robbed you of your innocence.

And she was a Hunter of all things. She could turn you in at the drop of a hat. You served on different sides of the law. There was no telling what information she was feeding the Association behind your backs.

Most of all, you grew to despise how she changed him. How his attention shifted, and she became the center of his universe.

He carted that fleeting softness he’d once shown you, to her. 

The man was playing Kitty Cards and sneaking plushies into the mansion for crying out loud. 

Singing, wearing bright colors, showing mercy.

The hunter was disarming in a way that you weren’t. Snuck into the fissures of his heart, effortlessly snatching him away from you.

You’d spent years getting accustomed to him. Getting him to crack a rare smile. It took her a matter of months.

You wanted to hate her so much. But with time, she grew on you, too. 

Crept her way into your heart with her waywardness, banter, and determination to make herself useful. To prove her worth. To find her niche. 

She surprised you time and time again. You thought she would crumble beneath the pressure. That she would eventually give in, realizing the nefarious life you led wasn’t for her.

But pressure formed diamonds, and she became more of an asset than a liability.

And before you knew it, you accepted your fate.

Like with Sylus, there was no singular pivoting point in your relationship. She just…grew on you like a benign tumor. 

She became something of a friend—someone you wanted to keep safe. You were inadvertently grooming your replacement. She was no longer your baggage. No longer a thorn in your side.

You had someone else you wanted to protect. Another relationship to nurture.

You started to look forward to the days she’d light up the mansion with her animated stories and colorful personality. Where’d she blunder up your missions but pull through in the end.

You were Thelma and Louise.

And she made Sylus smile in a way you never could. Laugh in a way you never could. Seeing your seemingly cold boss lower his defenses so much was nice, even if it wasn’t your doing. 

You sensed their relationship was cosmic. Something orchestrated by the universe. They were so close. So familiar. They had history, a connection that existed long before you stumbled into Sylus’ life. 

You found yourself quietly bowing out of a competition you constructed in your mind. She was the better match—the better woman. 

Her hands were clean. Yours were crusted with blood.

You never stood a chance from the start. 

The closer you grew to Ms. Hunter, the larger the wedge between you and Sylus became. 

There was no definitive title to their relationship, at least not one you had heard of. But out of respect for whatever brewed between them, you bowed out, reverting to the rigid partnership you initially shared with Sylus.

To cope with your unrequited feelings, you became self-destructive.

You thrust yourself into missions, trying to keep your mind off things. No matter how hard you tried, you couldn’t snuff out the feelings you still had for your boss. How shitty of a friend you were, pining for someone who never was yours. Could never be yours.

You drank more. Sought out pleasures of the flesh from people whose faces and names you could never remember.

You skipped meals. Slept like shit. Your Evol was dwindling more each day, reflecting the decaying state of your psyche.

You were punishing yourself in a way. Didn’t think you deserved anything more than a quick fuck. Something to curb the urge. You wanted to be used. Wanted to feel something other than this gut-wrenching pain. This emptiness. 

You pushed everyone away, donning that mask of nonchalance you were known for. 

Sylus caught on, but you were too wrapped up in your emotional turmoil to notice. 

You felt like you were submerged in water, slowly drowning, your hand held out for someone to save you. And Sylus was reaching for it, desperately trying to pull you out. To pull you back to shore.

But you were too prideful to take it. Too prideful to admit you weren’t okay. That you were envious. Resentful. Falling apart at the seams. You were paranoid. You were quietly being shoved out of the picture, and one day, Sylus would no longer find you valuable.

Not when you were molding someone else to fill your shoes. 

You felt worse each day because people noticed you weren’t okay. You hated when anyone worried. When people pitied you. You were a big girl—you could take care of yourself. You’d been doing it for years.

Ms. Hunter forced you to confront your feelings one day.

Grabbed you by your shoulders as the sun set over Destiny Cafe, shaking the shit out of you, the table rattling between you. Told you anyone with eyes could see the chemistry brewing between you and Sylus and how you were running from it like a fucking coward.

You were both lovesick puppies, walking on eggshells around each other.

He changed, too. Your cold shoulder, your demeanor—it made him more wary. Careless. Wounded.

‘If you don’t talk to each other, I’m gonna lock you both in a room, and neither of you is coming out until you resolve whatever’s going on between you,’ she said, exasperated.

You scoffed. There was no way Sylus had feelings for you, too. Not when she was in the picture. Not when you were something of convenience, something to further his agenda, protect his assets. His shield. His ever-reliant guard dog.

You didn’t think yourself worthy of affection. You were a weapon. A murderer. Crass. Damaged goods. He deserved better. 

But she told you to give him a chance. To stop being so fucking blind. It was driving her ragged, watching you both tread thin ice around her.

She wanted to smack some sense into you. You smirked, placatingly patting her hand on your shoulder. You were rubbing off on her. She was rubbing off on you.

You tried to be more attentive thereon. 

Noticed every lasting, yearning look Sylus cast your way with those scarlet eyes. Every errant brush of fingers over your hand, wrist, neck, back. How his voice affectionately sloped whenever he spoke to you, a boyish gleam to his eyes. He was gentle and homely and trying. 

And you weren’t used to it. You were afraid of it. 

You still had your moments when you ran. When you shoved him away, thinking things were too good to be true.

An overwhelming part of you still believed you weren’t good enough.

But he was trying. Really trying. He didn’t even use you as bait anymore. Rarely sent you on missions where he knew you’d encounter some strife. He was more protective. More considerate, and it made your stomach twist.

Things came to a head one fateful evening. 

He called you as the sun sought refuge behind the horizon. You’d been dodging him for weeks.

You were seated at a cafe, trying to breathe. 

The conversation was intense. Emotional. You were misty-eyed as it drew to a conclusion. Voice all croaky, throat rubbed raw. 

You were tired of running again. Exhausted with pushing yourself to the back burner in favor of others. You needed to know what his intentions were with you. If he was serious about you. If he was sure you were what he wanted.

He told you he’d never been more sure of anything in his life. 

You cried. You fucking cried, pacing around in that stupid cafe. You hadn’t cried in years. You hated how it made you feel. You were pathetic. 

When his voice broke through the static on your cell phone, it simmered with emotion. He sounded suspiciously close, telling you to turn around.

You did as he instructed, accustomed to doing what you were told without a second thought.

He stood before you, his phone still held to his ear, anguish screwing up his brows, a forlorn smile curving his lips. 

You watched him, misty-eyed and wobbly-lipped. 

The cafe’s wispy curtains fluttered between you. The setting sun limned both your bodies in amber. It was like a dream. 

Unspoken words hung in the air, nebulous like a cloud. Neither of you had to say a thing. This feeling between you, it was practically tangible.

He was wordless when he conquered the space between you in two long strides, tugging you into the circle of his arms.

He smelled so good. Felt so warm. So strong. So safe. You crumbled. He held you as you cried, stroking over your back, whispering words of affirmation into the crown of your head. Apologized over and over again.

You felt stupid. Melodramatic. But he came for you. 

It felt kind of nice—having someone chase you for once. Having someone pour every bit of themselves into you when all you’d known were crumbs.

He made love to you later that night. 

Made. Love. 

You were used to hot, furtive, emotionless sessions where you often forgot your partner’s name.

But Sylus, he…

He was so fucking gentle and patient and attentive. Asked if you were alright every chance he could. Handled you like glass, ensuring your needs were satiated long before he pursued his own.

He made you feel full. Warm. Revered. 

Filled you to the brim. Covered you like a warm blanket on the coldest night. His praise made your toes go numb. Made hot tears scorch down your face as your tongue wrapped around his name in pleasure once more.

Your relationship blossomed thereafter. 

Your insecurities still beckoned you with their scraggly fingers from time to time. But Sylus treated you more like a lover. An equal. A partner. 

For the first time in over a decade, you felt genuine happiness. You were healing.

But it was short-lived. There was always a nagging voice in the deepest reaches of your mind, reminding you everything good would eventually meet its end.

You were awaiting a fireworks show at the pier with Sylus, Ms. Hunter, and her friends. The carnival was in full swing.

You were browsing the stalls littering the boardwalk. Ran your fingers over various trinkets, your lips aching with a smile.

You decided to grab snow cones for two of the most important people in your life. It was a sweltering summer night, the kind of weather that covered every bit of exposed skin in a fine sheen of sweat.

Your purchases were in your hands, and you returned to them. Your heart pulled at the sight that greeted you.

They were standing together—Sylus and the hunter—leaning against the rail. Laughing, smiling, teasing. They looked so comfortable. So cozy. Something out of a painting. So natural.

Even long after you and Sylus became exclusive, you still had days when your feelings of inadequacy crept in. 

But they still looked like they fit together better than you did. You felt like an interloper. Like you were witnessing something you had no business being a part of. The universe was sending you signals. Warnings you should’ve heeded long ago.

The snow cones melted in your hands, their sticky, cold sweetness dripping down your knuckles, you had been watching them for so long.

Someone called for you through the cacophony of the other carnival-goers, dredging you from your thoughts. You turned, plastering on a fake smile as you acknowledged Tara. 

You jogged towards her, tamping down those nagging feelings. Sylus loved you. They both did.

Time seemed to slow to a crawl.

There was a familiar whizzing sound. The smell of carbon. Smoke. A sharp pain in your chest. You were moored to the spot as your smile melted away.

The snow cones fell from your hands. It hurt to breathe. Hurt to stand. You looked down as the crowd erupted in horrified screams. 

Red lazily spilled onto your shirt between your ribs until it was all you could see. You looked up, your vision bleary as Tara’s panicked face blurred in and out of focus. 

You sank to your knees, the air siphoned from your lungs. You didn’t scream. You couldn’t. You were falling. Sinking to the ground when—

Hands. Hands were pulling at you from all angles onto your back. Frantic, muddled voices. Screaming. Shouting. Shoving.

The boardwalk rocked beneath you as people ran every which way. You couldn’t keep your eyes open. Couldn’t breathe, couldn’t speak, your voice gurgled and wet. The taste of iron was dense on the back of your tongue.

You felt weightless. You were being pulled into a familiar embrace. Swaddled in that familiar scent. Your cheeks were wet, but not from your tears.

Scarlet. You recall scarlet eyes flitting in and out of clarity as your vision darkened around the corners like a vignette. You reached up to touch them. To touch that warm, stubbled cheek. Trace those pretty, petal pink lips. That beautiful nose.

You were cold. So cold. So weak. Shaky. You managed a smile as blood flooded your chest. Filled the space between your teeth.

Your hand fell away, thudding against the floorboards. You couldn’t move. Why couldn’t you move? Why couldn’t you—

You were slipping away, the homely call of darkness pulling you under.

You don’t think you’ve ever heard him scream like that. It was blood-curdling. Devastating. Fire and brimstone. Like demons tearing through hell’s gates.

You wanted to comfort him. Never wanted to hear that sort of anguish in his voice again. But you couldn’t. Fucking. Move.

You were dying.

Maybe this was your punishment for tempting fate—his punishment for choosing you over what was already predetermined. 

Fate always had a way of mucking things up, didn’t it?

[satori-runa]

—The flesh we own

Summary: 1x1x1x1 realizes that after all the hatred and the disgust, that there is still a reason to love you.

Tags: Slight mention of gore, blood, ooc, hunter and prey dynamic

Words: 0,4

Author note: I have never played forsaken and this is written for a friend. I apologise for any lore mistakes or mischaractering.

⊹₊ ˚‧︵‿₊୨୧₊‿︵‧ ˚ ₊⊹

1x1x1x1 stood at the edge of the treeline, veiled in shadow where the bright green aspects of his form blended in perfectly with his surroundings.

His eyes, if they could be called that, narrowed in on the lone figure below. You.

You ran like a creature born for survival—fast, focused, your breath ragged but controlled. Every footfall landed in thick, clinging mud, yet you moved as though it were nothing but air. You leapt over roots, ducked under broken tree stumps, twisted through the warped terrain like you knew it. Like it was something that you did over and over again.

He hated that.

He hated how you adapted. How you endured. The rest of your team had already been consumed, torn apart by the hands of his creatures, bloody flesh scattered like confetti in the storm. But you—resilient, irritating, alive—you refused to break.

And oh, how that enraged him.

There was something primal about his obsession. Something raw and violent, barely caged beneath his shifting surface. He despised the way you breathed, the heat radiating off your living body, the pulse that beat so arrogantly beneath your skin. You were a disgusting little parasite that refused to yield under his power.

If there was one thing, a single thing, that could be loved about you, then it was your mortality.

A flame that could be snuffed with just enough pressure. Pressure that he owned.

And when the moment came—oh, and it would come—he would savor it. He would descend from the treeline like a specter, decay and rot following his steps like a second shadow. He would wrap his fingers around your throat, slowly, deliberately, just enough to silence the scream before it left your lips.

He would watch your eyes, wide and glistening with panic. Not because he wanted your fear, but because he wanted your awareness. He wanted you to know that you had lost. That your final, frantic resistance had been beautifully pointless.

And then his hand,cold, jagge, would press against your chest, sliding beneath your clothes with surgical precision. Not to explore, but to erase. To feel the warmth, the rhythm, the fragile humanity before it was extinguished forever. He caresses your flesh with his fingertips, savouring it as his mind runs wild. Oh how wonderful your deep red blood would look spilled between his fingers.

He made sure to love it all.

[juricel]

I got an idea for a yandere shadow milk thing...a yandere concept i thought up in general.

Imagine yandere shadow milk with a love who just...doesn't fight back. Like they laze around shadow milk's home, let's him shower them with affection, and just easily gives in...to the point where even shadow milk would be so concerned why y/n just...gave up to him so easily.

Think it's because of him being a very powerful beast? No! It's because y/n is just...weak and had just...given up.

If ya wanna go darker...maybe say they had a bad homelife or something? If you're uncomfortable with that then feel free to make your own reason why reader is...well already broken in a way so they just accept shadow milk taking them in and stuff...

Like can already imagine some senarios like shadow milk putting y/n outside to get some fresh air and trying to spark some life back into them but what do they do? They just...waddle back into the spire and flop onto the couch.

Just an interesting concept of a love who has already given up before the yandere-ness even started and just goes with the flow...

Sorry if this is a weird concept and if ya don't wanna do it, it's completely fine and I can always just send in another request to replace this one.

If you do end up writing it...I hope you enjoy it! If not then apologies if this request makes ya uncomfortable in any way/shape/form...

a/n: it's a pretty unique idea! and nono, don't worry, if anything, i have written worse before so no worries!

— yandere! shadow milk cookie x corpse-like! reader hcs

໒꒰՞ ܸ. .ܸ՞꒱ა ۪ ׂ CONTENT WARNING: surprisingly not much content warning, yanderes, heavy possessive and obssessive behavior, unhealthy relationship, implied forced established relationship, mentioned mindbreak, implied physical and emotional abuse, potential ooc.

𖦁 shadow milk cookie adores puppets (cookies); doted on the way they come haywire when deluded when brainwashed with illusions, doted on the way they struggle and kicked like overturned beetles, their legs scrabbling at the air, at nothing, at everything—scrambling and holding onto grains of sand between their fingers to maintain their sanity. a deliciously absurd, perfectly grotesque show! they were foolish—adorable! and shadow milk cookie, ever the connoisseur of folly, relished their spasms, their little convulsive rebellions against the strings they could not see. a puppet is at its most exquisite when it believes in its own freedom, when it writhes not out of obedience but out of some feverish, implanted conviction that it resists. he watched them with the indulgence of an artist admiring his own brushstrokes—oh, the precision of their programmed passions, the meticulous choreography of their so-called thoughts! one whispered suggestion, a single tug at the right filament, and behold!—a revolution, a devotion, a hatred, all flaring up like phosphorous, consuming, dazzling, and then, just as suddenly, extinguished: it always never failed to draw a good laugh from him, but oh, his sweet moth-lit darling, his dear starved seraph, didn't fall under the category.

𖦁 at first, he was ecstatic—how prettily you danced, how sweetly you swayed to the tug of his strings. his dear puppet, so pliant, so perfectly wound to his will. but oh, how swiftly delight sours into monotony! the charm of obedience is in its resistance, in the tension before surrender, in the flickering illusion of will before it is snuffed out. and you, poor thing, had gone limp too soon, a marionette whose joints no longer creaked, whose painted eyes no longer widened in horror or bliss. what was left to do but break you apart? a toy must shatter to be new again, to sing anew in its ruin. but even as he wrenched and twisted, even as he chipped away at that fragile veneer, you remained—ah, how dreadfully, how disappointingly the same! the same sweet darling, limp as a wilted bloom, with a demeanor not unlike a corpse cooling beneath its shroud. and oh, how that vexed him, bringing a petulant frown to his lips.

𖦁 and almost, almost, he feels bad but not enough to free you from his strings. of course, he could try again—he always could. and yet, the results, much to his mounting vexation, remained unchanged. you remained unchanged. a broken puppet that did not twitch, a porcelain thing that refused to shatter properly, no matter how fervently he willed it. and so, in a rare moment of something almost resembling consideration, he entertained the notion—briefly, ever so briefly—of letting you go. not as an act of mercy, no, but as an experiment. don't get him wrong! he adored you best when you were a ruin of his own making, deadened, petrified, crumbling deliciously at the seams—but only when it was by his hand. the thought of anyone else attempting to unmake you, to claim the pleasure of watching you fall apart—ah, the sheer audacity! he would kill them. and he would do it without fanfare, without flourish, as one swats an insect interrupting an evening’s amusement. So, for once, he loosened his grasp, allowed you the illusion of escape, certain—no, convinced—that this taste of freedom would rekindle the lost spark, that you would return quivering, trembling, gasping, that the dance would begin anew with the liveliness he so craved. but oh. oh, how infuriating. you returned just as you had left—unshaken, unchanged, that same placid corpse as you were. the same glass-eyed indifference, the same dreadful, impenetrable stillness. A doll left too long in the rain, not softened, not weakened, merely waterlogged with something he could neither extract nor break.

𖦁 ah, how he despised it, that wretched imperfection, that offense to his carefully curated world. there must be a way to remedy it, to smooth out the unsightly edges, to make you whole—no, to make you better.

a/n: juricel writing a somewhat soft yandere shadow milk cookie?? hmm! for a good while, i was actually stuck on how to make him soft while still making him the good ol shadow milk cookie i like... do you guys prefer this shadow milk cookie or a meaner version?

[grudgecollector]

Afterglow | Nam-gyu / American!Reader

You're reading part one

Story Summary: Nam-gyu gets a new job and finds himself falling for the girl behind the deli counter. Words: 1.4k Tags/Warnings: Nam-gyu and Thanos have PTSD, canon divergence, Thanos lives, denial, mentions of death/blood/murder, angst, panic attacks, drug use, NOT PROOF READ A/N: This is SOOO self indulgent, like insanely self indulgent.

This is my first ever Squid Game fic. Will be multi-part story, I'm still a little rusty with my writing as I'm still getting back into it. So hopefully this is okay.

This may be a little OOC, but erm i do not care. He's my little meow meow

PART TWO | MASTERLIST

Two years... It's been two years and yet Nam-gyu’s hands still tremble so fiercely. His chest still felt tight with guilt, unable to look at his own reflection. He could barely stomach his food anymore, each meal mushy and tasteless. Nothing felt right, his shoes constantly felt like they were on the wrong feet, his hands never felt clean, and his mind felt like it was being torn to shreds. 

He felt fragile, ready to break at any point. 

Nam-gyu thought he was doing better, he thought that the memories finally subsided. The horrible things he had done as a way to survive were finally buried behind him. 

With each loud bang that echoed outside his apartment he could see them. The bodies, blood, the horrified looks in their eyes right before their lives were snuffed out.

He could remember the way his heart raced, pounding so fiercely against his ribcage, a cold sweat forming on the back of his neck.

He could still feel Se-mi’s blood on his hands, the warmth of it slipping between his fingers and under his nails. 

Tears clouded Nam-gyu’s vision, his head tilting back against the cold tile of the shower, hoping that the loud rush of water could block out the thundering sounds of fireworks outside. 

Every crackling pop made him jump, his blunt nails digging into the skin of his thighs. 

It was New Years in America, and yet Nam-gyu could not find it in himself to celebrate. 

“Fuck…” Nam-gyu whimpered, stifling a sob against the back of his hand. What had he done…

He had to do it… He had to do it… He had to do it… 

Nam-gyu closed his eyes, feeling that cold sweat rush back over him as the memory of Se-mi’s lifeless body flashed in his head. His trembling hands quickly shot up to his face, smacking against the sides of his head harshly. 

He wished so badly he could just erase those games from his mind, forget everything.

Anything… He would do anything…

“Nam-gyu! Hey man!” Su-bong slammed his hands on the closed door of the bathroom, making the man inside yelp loudly, “Stop hiding in the bathroom, come on let’s drink or something!” 

“Leave me alone…” Nam-gyu whispered, “Leave me alone…” He clenched his eyes shut, burying his head between his legs. 

“Nam-gyu!” 

There were suddenly hands on his shoulders.

Nam-gyu flinched, tears now flowing freely from his eyes as his head whipped up, for a split second he thought he saw pink and black. His heart felt like it would beat out of his chest, and he could barely move on his own volition thanks to how harshly his body shook. 

“Leave me alone!” His voice was broken up by sobs, eyes unable to focus. 

“Hey! Nam-gyu calm down, it’s just me!” Su-bong could feel his hair getting wet as he got closer to Nam-gyu, the spray from the shower pouring down on the both of them, “Come on man, you know where you are.” His hand smacked against Nam-gyu’s face lightly. 

“I can’t-” Nam-gyu’s hand went to his chest, the t-shirt he was wearing soaked all the way through, “I can’t…. Breathe. Fu… Fuck.” 

Su-bong stared at his best friend with wide eyes, “Alright buddy, I’m gonna need you to look at me.” 

Nam-gyu tried his best to focus, the flash of Su-bong's blue hair breaking through his spotty vision. 

Su-bong tried his best to help him, guiding his breathing, and whatever other methods that were listed out in those videos he watched months ago. He made sure that Nam-gyu followed his instructions, watching as his shoulders started to relax, his chest finally rising and falling at a normal rate. 

Nam-gyu was still shaking, but Su-bong already had a plan to help calm him down. 

~~~

He was finally able to drag Nam-gyu from the bathroom after twenty minutes, forcing him to change out of his soaked clothes. Pushing him into his room before closing the door.

Su-bong busied himself with rolling another blunt while he waited for his friend.

After a minute or two of staring at himself in the mirror, Nam-gyu came out of his bedroom in just an oversized t-shirt and pajama pants. A bright pink vape was in his right hand, and a throw blanket was slung over his left shoulder. 

“It’s about time.” Su-bong sighed, leaning back against the arm of the couch. “Sit. I rolled you one too.” He placed the blunt between his own lips and lit it. 

Nam-gyu brushed a strand of wet hair behind his ear, throwing his blanket down on Su-bong’s legs before sitting on the opposite side of the couch, feeling his friend's foot tap against his thigh. 

“You good, man?” 

“You always roll so badly.” Nam-gyu commented as he reached over for the blunt left on the coffee table. 

“Just smoke it, Nam-su.” Su-bong chuckled, kicking a foot against Nam-gyu’s thigh. 

Nam-gyu glared at him harshly, earning a louder laugh from his friend. 

“I’m just fucking with you, bro.” 

The next hour passed by quickly, Nam-gyu’s hands finally stopped shaking and he felt much more relaxed. His heart finally stopped beating so harshly, his body barely reacting to the fireworks outside now. 

He sank down on the couch, his back practically laying down on the cushions and his knees knocking against the coffee table. He brought a hand up to brush his long hair from his eyes, looking to the side to find Su-bong scrolling through TikTok. 

“Ever hear back from that job you applied for?” Su-bong asked suddenly, glancing up from his phone. 

“Huh?” Nam-gyu blinked, “Oh yeah… Uh I should be starting in a few days.” 

Su-bong hummed, nodding to himself before looking back down at his phone. 

~~~

The morning air nipped against your skin as you opened your car door, the hinges groaning in protest. Fog covered most of the parking lot, the sun trying its best to break through the clouds above your head, wind blew the leaves from underneath your car just as you shut the door. 

A sigh fell from your lips, you were so tired. 

“Good morning.” You smiled at one of your co-workers that stood behind the counter, an excited squeal came from her as she looked up. 

“Finally! I’ve been waiting for you to get here.” 

You chuckled quietly, finger gently tapping against the energy drink you were holding, hoping it’ll carry you through the next eight hours quickly. I should have gone to bed earlier last night.

Danny put down the paper she was holding once you rounded the corner, a smile curved her lips as she dug through the pocket of her vest. She pulled out a baggie with two small brownies in it. 

“I made them last night and thought you might wanna try.” She giggled quietly, walking back over to the cake she was working on, “I wouldn’t recommend taking the whole thing though, they’re strong.” 

“Shiiit, thanks Danny.” You smiled, pushing the swinging door to the back kitchen open. “Morning Mrs. Carrie.” 

One of your older coworkers turned away from the donuts she was icing, “Morning.” 

In your department it was pretty easy to get closer to your co-workers. You were all forced to work so closely together, especially in the deli, two to four people stuck behind a counter for eight hours at the same time.

There was a bond amongst the decently sized group you had, a bond that would sometimes sour with short lived drama that you had no interest being dragged into. 

You fished the hairnet out of your pocket, and grabbed an apron from the basket by the door. 

“Good morning.” Your co-worker Alice smiled as you walked closer to her, tying the apron around your waist. 

“Morning.” 

You checked the tablet, making sure that there weren’t any orders for the personal shoppers to pick up. 

The next few hours went by smoothly enough, thankfully it wasn’t too busy in the store. Making it a lot easier for you to cook everything you needed, make sure that the condiments beside the hot bar were filled, reducing stress for your coworker and you. 

“I’m going on my lunch.” You told Alice, taking your gloves off and throwing them away. 

“Alright, have fun.” She joked. 

You walked out from behind the counter, pulling your jacket closer around you before pulling your phone out and looking at the time. God you still had four more hours… 

~~~

Nam-gyu’s first day had gone somewhat smoothly, learning how to do everything was easy enough when he had someone helping him.

All he had to do was shop for other people’s groceries all day, what could be so hard about that?

It was a good way to keep his mind off things, an earbud hidden away by his hair to drown out any thoughts that could bother him as he worked. 

Finally break time was rolling around, and he trailed off from his department towards the deli. He wasn’t sure if he would even be able to eat, but he could at least try something.

Four more hours… Nam-gyu looked back up from his phone. Gasping softly when he runs into another person. They stumble back a little, and his phone drops on the ground. 

The person looks at him, hurried apologies flooding from both of their mouths as she tucks her phone back into her vest pocket. 

“I’m so sorry.” “I wasn’t paying attention.” “That was my fault.” 

Nam-gyu looked at her widened eyes, the apologetic expression forming into a small smile as they talked over each other. He couldn’t help but smile a little too, laughing quietly. 

[blyghthound]

might also attempt getting sylvie's personal questline nailed down because i think i have a good idea for it that gives her something tangible to work toward

gonna work on making a bonds/relationships page for sylvie's google doc for a bit

[endawn]

thinking about the bad outcome to the hunger situation during dav ( it manages to rip mercy out of pax and repossess him ) because not only is it awful for pax but because if rook isn’t mw or emm isn’t in the party, mercy WILL twist into ruthlessness.

[locketsvault]

「 JEALOUSLY IS A GREEN BUG 」

pairing: ranpo edogawa x gender neutral reader

tags: gender neutral reader, established relationship, jealousy senario, nsfw ending, they/them pronouns used, first person

warnings: the ending isn’t too explicit but it is nsfw, not proof read

request: May I request jealousy(not toxic ofc) hcs for bsd men(specifically ranpo), gn reader of course, can be both sfw and nsfw! scenario can be reader speaking to someone for too long or someone flirts with reader in front of them (original request found here.)

word count: 867

a/n: I decided to do a scenario with just ranpo, since I wouldn’t mind making this a mini series later on. It may also be be ooc bc I struggle writing dialogue for him.

Ranpo has never been one to enjoy official work style parties. The only exception is the ones the ada throw, but it’s a lot more like a family than buisness. Plus, he gets all his sweets. But dressing up nice and putting on a fake smile to guilt trip people into whatever you need? Not him. He’s also became aware that he’s just not the kind of person to have at events like that. The only exception is for you.

You and a co worker got promoted and there was an official event for it. You had asked your boyfriend to come to the event with you. And knowing it meant a lot to you, he agreed. While usually he’s very stubborn, when it comes to you he’s willing to push himself a bit and give in.

He warned you that he had a case to work on and would come by a little late, but you didn’t mind. Before you started dating you both communicated that he may get pulled away when you need him, and you reassured that it would be okay. It was his job, and he saved people after all. So you two arrived separately.

It didn’t take him long at all to finish the case, and thirty minutes after you got to the building he showed up. He made his way immediately over to where he believed you’d be, not really greeting anyone else. Those who’s worked with you for a while was. It surprised at all, and knew better than trying to talk to him.

When he finally found you, you were talking to a co worker, one he didn’t recognize. Upon closer inspection the co worker seemed to be flirting with you. You obviously didn’t seem amused, but you were trying to be polite. That was the difference between you two. He could care less about hurting others feelings. But you always did.

He stood by watching amused, albeit a bit jealous. He was curious what you’d do to stop him. And he trusted you enough to handle it yourself. But when you tried to excuse yourself, and the co worker grabbed your arm, his amusement was snuffed out immediately. A flash of discomfort washed over you, added on by the fact a strange man was touching you, he was ready to step in and tear him to shreds.

Other co workers who saw what happened and watched Ranpo walk up to you two knew trouble was about to start, but some of them were ready for the show. They were aware of how unhinged he could be. And for many, this was the first time they saw his eyes open, glued to your form.

“I’m sorry I’m late dearest, another idiot thought he could get away with murder.” He said with a sickeningly sweet smile. “You, I don’t know who you are, and I don’t care. It’s obvious they’re not interested, so why do you think you have the right to touch them?”

As he spoke he wrapped his arm around your waist, watching with his bright green eyes as the man turned red and immediately let you go. He started stammering out apologies, but Ranpo attention quickly left him once he let go. He was calm enough to know you didn’t like it when he made scenes at your work. Huffing, his arm moved from your waist to your hand, dragging you off to an area no one else was at.

He pinned you to the wall, whines escaping his lips as he nuzzled his face into your neck. You couldn’t help but gasp, not expecting the action, despite how clingy he can be. His voice returned to its usual playful tone as he whined out “why does everyone constantly try to take you from me?”

He nipped your neck a few times before sighing and just resting your head in your neck, his hands resting on the wall next to your torso. You brought a hand up, raking it through his hair.

“Are you… jealous?” You asked, slightly amused at his actions. He was trying not to mark you right now, you could tell.

“So what if I am? Every time I go out with you people hit on you! And then they try to take you from me. I don’t like it.” He whined out, pulling away to glare at you, as if the question was obvious, as if you were trying to tease him.

You knew because of his past jealousy was something he struggled with, despite how much he may try to hide it. He handled it well honestly, he never accused you of anything, never got mad at you for what others try to do, never tried to control you. But you could see it in his eyes.

You cooed, cupping his cheek and bringing your lips close to his. “You have nothing to be jealous over, I’m yours, only yours.”

He didn’t respond, instead pulling your head closer to kiss you, a hint of desperation in the pressure of the kiss. You could tell, you both needed to leave. Your jealous baby needed taking care of. And you were happy to comply.

main hub ✦ masterlist ✦ to do list

[undertheorangetree]

Snowed In

Summary- A snow storm leads to an opportunity.

Warnings- MDNI 18+ NSFW. Female reader. Modern Aemond. Cat Vhagar is modern AU canon. Friends to lovers vibe. Thigh riding. Blowjob. Cunnilingus. P in V sex. Safe sex practices for once. Probably ooc Aemond cuz he's experiencing joy.

Author's Note- Yes all of my fics take place in the winter what about it?? That's my business that I am now involving you in link to full fic below :)

dividers by me

"They've just closed campus."

Her head pops up from behind her laptop, staring at Aemond in wide eyed disbelief. Already, there is a sympathetic wince on his face, the kind that is only ever present when he knows she is about to get upset, but even then she refuses to believe him.

"Closed? What do you mean closed?"

"It says they had to on account of the weather."

"No, they haven't. Let me see."

He spins his laptop screen to face her, forcing her to push her own down in order to see properly. His email has been left open on the page and her eyes rove over the message she had so desperately hoped he had made up. There before her in big bold letters are the words URGENT- CAMPUS CLOSED followed by a brief explanation blaming a snow storm and apologizing for any inconveniences the decision may have caused.

She lets out a groan, leaning back in the library's old chair, a pleading look on her face as if Aemond is the one responsible for making such decisions. He may as well be, with his family being such heavy contributors to Oldtown University's alumni fund, his last name plastered across the front of one of the many building on campus. She has half the mind to ask him to go speak to whichever family member is on the chair committee to convince them to reverse the decision and allow them to go back to finishing their final papers, though somehow she doubts that would be likely.

"The storm wasn't supposed to start until tomorrow. It can't already be that bad, can it?"

He reaches over toward the blinds they have long since closed, both of them having agreed that the glare from the sun was too distracting hours ago, only to be met with the sight of a now white campus, the snow blanketing near everything in sight. It's evident now why they would have shut down campus - it must have been snowing for hours- but she still feels something close to dread work its way up her spine.

She sucks in a heavy breath, turning to face Aemond once more. "Do you think they would have shut down the buses too?"

She knows it's a lost cause even as she asks it. The university is located away from the port, standing alone at the top of one of the mountains. It's a steep drive even in idle conditions and she knows that with the snow on the roads, the chances of her being able to commute back to her apartment are slim to none.

Just as she suspects, he simply looks at her, face contorted in a way that clearly implies that she already knows the answer. She bites out a curse, half slamming her laptop down before dropping her face into her hands.

The last thing she wants to do is spend the night on campus. She doubts that they were the only two caught unaware and trying to find a place to camp out for the night is going to be hell. Not for him, of course. Aemond's family connections came with seemingly endless perks and he had been set up with a beautiful flat on campus, less than a five minute walk from the library. He has lived there ever since she has known him and she had been there more times than she could count. Since first befriending him during orientation week in their first year, she had spent countless nights eating take out and studying for finals there. With their joint history major, they had taken nearly every class together, making last night studying near second nature at this point, so close to finishing their degrees.

There's a faint burn of envy in her gut at the thought of his flat- warm, isolated, cozy- but it's quickly snuffed out by her nervousness, fretting over where exactly she is meant to camp out tonight. She doubts she will actually sleep, not while she’s alone on campus, but she still wants to be at least somewhat comfortable. A padded chair would be ideal, though she knows they will be difficult to come by if she doesn’t act quickly.

Shoving her laptop back into her bag, she begins collecting the handful of papers she had sprawled out across the tabletop. "I guess I should go and try to find somewhere to sleep. It's going to be a blood bath trying to find something with decent cushioning."

He scoffs. "You're not going to be fighting any blood baths. Just spend the night at mine."

Read the rest here

[bked0n-amoxacillin]

Sleepy sleep

(idk wtf the title is. And I KNOW this is ooc and he wouldn’t let this happen if Jesus came down and told him to right to his face. BUT let me have my moment😔.)

The hideout was quiet, save for the occasional creak of the old building settling. Everyone was either asleep or pretending to be—except for you. Sleep had been evading you for hours, leaving you restless and irritated. With a sigh, you pushed off your mattress and padded barefoot into the dimly lit hallway, hoping a short walk might clear your mind.

That’s when you heard it—soft chuckling coming from a room nearby. Dabi’s room.  

Curious, you stepped closer, peeking your head in through the slightly open door. He was lying on his bed, the dim light from his phone casting a faint glow over his face. His purple scarred lips curled into a smirk as he scrolled through whatever had amused him so much.  

“You know, for someone with a ‘brooding loner’ aesthetic, you sure do laugh a lot,” you teased, stepping inside without invitation.  

Dabi didn’t even flinch. He just flicked his eyes up at you before turning his attention back to his screen. “Didn’t know you were keeping track,” he muttered, but there was no real bite to his words.  

You sat down beside him on the bed, close enough that you could feel the warmth radiating off his skin. “Couldn’t sleep,” you admitted.  

“Yeah? And you thought bugging me would help?”  

“Maybe.” You leaned in a little, tilting your head to see what he was watching, but he locked his phone and shoved it under his pillow before you could catch a glimpse.  

“Lame,” you scoffed, earning a quiet chuckle from him.  

A beat of silence passed before you glanced at his hand, remembering something you’d been meaning to ask for a while. “Hey, show me your quirk.”  

Dabi arched a brow, as if debating whether or not to humor you. “You’ve seen it before.”  

“Yeah, but not up close like this.” You leaned forward, eyes bright with curiosity. “I think it’s cool.”  

For a second, he just stared at you, unreadable as ever. Then, with a low exhale, he raised a hand and flicked his fingers. A small blue flame sparked to life, flickering between his fingers. The eerie glow of it reflected in his eyes as he lazily twirled the fire between each finger, moving it seamlessly like a trick he’d mastered long ago.  

You watched, completely mesmerized. “That’s so cool,” you murmured, your voice barely above a whisper.  

His smirk grew slightly. “Yeah?”  

You nodded, entranced by the way the fire moved so naturally in his hands, like an extension of himself. “It’s different seeing it up close like this. The color is pretty.”  

Dabi rolled his eyes, but there was a certain softness in his expression. “It’s not exactly fireworks, Y/N.”  

“I still like it.”  

He let the flame dance a little longer before finally snuffing it out with a lazy flick of his wrist. “Alright, you got your show,” he said, leaning back against the headboard. “Now what?”  

You hesitated for a moment before lying back beside him, staring up at the ceiling. “Now, I try to sleep. But I think I’ll stay here.”  

Dabi sighed, running a hand through his dark hair. “You’re a pain,” he muttered, but he didn’t tell you to leave. Instead, he shifted slightly, making just enough room for you to get comfortable.  

The hideout was cold. *Bone-chillingly* cold. The kind of cold that seeped into your skin and made it impossible to get comfortable, no matter how much you curled in on yourself. The League was far too broke—and too concerned with staying hidden—to afford heating, and with it being the dead of winter, the building felt more like a freezer than a place meant for people to live in.  

You shivered involuntarily, wrapping your arms around yourself. Lying next to Dabi had helped a little, but the thin blanket covering his mattress did nothing to keep the cold at bay. Meanwhile, he seemed completely unbothered, still scrolling on his phone like he wasn’t feeling the temperature at all.  

Then it hit you. *Of course he isn’t cold. He’s a walking space heater.*  

A quiet smirk tugged at your lips as you shifted slightly closer. At first, you tried to be subtle about it, inching toward his side little by little. But after another brutal gust of wind snuck through the cracks in the walls, you gave up on subtlety altogether.  

With zero hesitation, you pressed yourself right up against him.  

Dabi tensed immediately, finally glancing away from his screen. “Uh—what the hell do you think you’re doing?”  

You buried your face against his shoulder, sighing at the immediate warmth that spread through your skin. “Warming up,” you mumbled. “You’re like a human furnace .”  

Dabi scoffed, but he didn’t shove you off. “Yeah, no shit.”  

You hummed in response, already feeling your body relax as the cold slowly melted away. His warmth was addicting, soothing in a way you hadn’t expected. Without even thinking, you snuggled in closer, throwing an arm lazily over his torso.  

Dabi stiffened again. “Okay, now you’re pushing it.”  

“Shh,” you hushed him, voice laced with sleepiness. “You’re warm. Just let it happen.”  

For a moment, he didn’t say anything. You could feel him debating it, probably weighing how much effort it would take to push you away versus just dealing with it.  

Then, to your surprise, he let out a low sigh and shifted slightly. Not away from you—*but toward you.*  

“Whatever,” he muttered. “Just don’t start drooling on me.”  

You grinned sleepily, already drifting off as his warmth fully enveloped you. “No promises.”  

Dabi huffed, but you swore you could hear the faintest hint of amusement in it. He didn’t move after that, just kept his phone in one hand while his other arm rested loosely near your waist.  

The hideout was still freezing. The wind still howled outside. But pressed up against Dabi, wrapped in his steady heat, you felt nothing but warmth.  

And for the first time that night, sleep finally found you.

[g1rld1ary]

you never disappointed me - part three

part one part two part three part four

➻ synopsis: luke castellan x aphrodite!reader ; after beckendorf does some research with silena, luke finally knows how to ask you out (10 things I about you AU)

➻ word count: 2642

➻ warnings: ooc/kind of loser!luke, ooc silena, she/her pronouns used for reader, sexual innuendos, alcohol, smoking

➻ so i immediately got hit with a ton of uni work lols (so mean for first week??) so this took a little longer than expected sorries!!

TAGLIST: @myxticmoon @wicca-void @leeknows-wife @thekittyxo-blog @number-onekidqueen @instabull @slaybestieslay946 @sflame15-blog @yourfavmiki @ivory-sage

════ ⋆★⋆ ════

While you were being tormented by the two boys Camp Half-Blood (or maybe your mom?) kept sending your way, Charles was following Silena around like a lost puppy, noting down whatever she could find about you in your limited personal space in the Aphrodite cabin. After several minutes of nothing promising, he was starting to feel hopeless.

“She’s not a…” Beckendorf trailed off, looking for more delicate phrasing.

“Girl in Red fan? No. I found a picture of Heath Ledger under her bunk once so I’m pretty sure she’s not harbouring any queer feelings.”

“So that’s the kind of guy she likes? Pretty guys?”

“I don’t know,” Silena said impetuously, “All I’ve ever heard her say is that she’d die before dating a guy that smokes.” Beckendorf cringed. That was an issue. Silena continued mindlessly, digging through your drawers and belongings. She pulled out your reading list, planner and a sticky note of things you were going to do when you left after summer. Finally, Silena let out a devious giggle as she dug through your top drawer. She didn’t let Beckendorf wonder for long, as she pulled out a pretty pair of lacy black underwear.

It wasn’t the most scandalous piece of lingerie sitting in that cabin — not by far, but Beckendorf still blushed like the teenage boy he was, almost too afraid to look at the scrap of fabric.

“And, uh, what does that tell us?” He asked, eyes anywhere but the cloth.

“She wants to have sex someday, that’s what,” She said it as if it were obvious, and Beckendorf wished a hole would open up and swallow him down. He really didn’t want to be talking about your sexual desire right now.

“She might just like the colour?” He mumbled, hand running over his hair in an effort to ground him.

“You don’t buy black lingerie unless you want someone to see it.” Beckendorf felt kind of guilty, he figured he probably wasn’t who you had in mind when buying black lingerie, and it was starting to feel like a serious invasion of privacy. That was only heightened when Silena pointedly avoided telling him which area was hers, saying it was ‘private’. He rationalised his actions by praying to the Gods the plan would work and everyone would get a happy ever after.

Still, Percy and Beckendorf took this research to Luke in his semi-secret spot behind the training arena, where he could drink and smoke without being worried about being caught by the younger kids or Chiron. He didn’t look exactly happy to see them, but Beckendorf thought he might just be warming up to them.

“So, what’ve you got for me?” He asked, taking a swig of his beer.

“Insights into a very complicated girl,” Percy said, dislike of you obvious.

“Just one question,” Beckendorf asked “Should you be drinking if you don’t have a liver?” One of his new brothers had told him the rumour that Luke had sold his liver on the black market during his quest for a pack of cigarettes and a ticket back to camp.

“She hates smokers!” Percy interrupted, hopefully before Luke could process what Beckendorf had said, and very successfully redirected his focus as Beckendorf grabbed the lit cigarette out of his hand, snuffing it out on the dirt.

“So I’m a… non-smoker now?” Luke spat the words, sounding almost disgusted with himself.

“Just for now,” Beckendorf assured him. “And one more problem — Silena said that she likes ‘pretty guys’.” A tense silence fell upon them and Charles wished that sometimes he would think before he spoke. Luke’s gaze on him was heavy and intimidating, and if Percy wasn’t there with him Beckendorf probably would have cowered and escaped.

“Are you telling me I’m not a pretty guy?” Luke asked, and if he had to say, Beckendorf thought his attitude right now definitely wasn’t helping his case. He and Percy shared a quick look before reassuring Luke that he absolutely was a pretty guy, they just had limited experience in deciding those labels. Satisfied, Luke glanced at the list Beckendorf handed him of all of your interests and engagements. He frowned, and both the younger boys exchanged uneasy eye contact.

“So what, I’m supposed to buy her noodles and books and sit around listening to some shitty girl power band?” He asked, dread and boredom evident in his eyes.

“Have you ever been to Club Skunk? Her favourite band is playing there tomorrow night,” Beckendorf provided, disheartened by the quick shake of Luke’s head.

“I cannot be seen at Club Skunk.”

“But she’s gonna be there! She’s got tickets!” He protested, and Percy put a subtle hand on his arm.

“Dude, everyone you know is here. No one’s gonna see you at Club Skunk and think you’re less of a man or whatever. I’ll tell everyone you’re off in the woods smoking weed or something.” Luke looked at them for a long moment, seemingly considering the offer. Finally he agreed, and Beckendorf thought it may have just been to get them to go away, but he was happy enough.

Luke, having gotten over the humiliation it would be to go to Club Skunk, was more than interested at the new piece of information he’d just learned. He thought he was the only one who snuck out of camp, and he wondered how often you did it. Reasonably frequently, he guessed, since you were going to all the trouble to see a band that probably played around the state constantly. You just kept on surprising him, and though it was all a bit of an effort on his part, he had started to enjoy getting to know the parts of you that you kept hidden behind the icy exterior.

You, on the other hand, were getting really weirded out. You might’ve just been paranoid, but you were sure that the new Hephaestus kid who was friends with Percy kept staring at you. Even Percy glanced at you more than once during dinner, something you didn’t think had ever happened before — and you were not looking for attention from the camp’s golden boy, no matter how many times he’d probably saved your life by extension of his quests. Those two, coupled with Luke, whose attentions had inexplicably been focused on you for the last week, made you feel a bit like an animal on display; violently uncomfortable. As you left the meal you shot Beckendorf a nasty glare, somewhat satisfied when he jumped and averted his eyes. You shook your head in a physical attempt to clear the burdens of your thoughts. Soon you wouldn’t have to worry about any of the campers or the stupidity that flowed around the grounds.

About twenty minutes after the campfire started and the rest of the camp were safely together, you began the trek up to the Hamptons — the closest city with a venue. You waited anxiously for the bus to pick you up outside the camp lines, looking over your shoulder to ensure no one had caught you. If your adventures got around camp then Silena would absolutely tell your father as payback for being the reason she can’t date, and that was a whole new set of issues you really didn’t care to deal with. Luke, standing in the shadows watching, felt almost bad for spying on you. Almost.

You could feel your shoulders relax as you got further and further away from camp, the judgement and expectations of people you didn’t even like far behind you for the night. You’d been looking forward to this show since you got tickets with your friends during the school term, and you were determined to make it worth the pain of summer. And it really, really was. Your whole friend group had made it, making it a long awaited reunion, and the band was one you’d been following for years. You danced with all your energy, gleefully shouting lyrics and laughing loudly when you got them terribly wrong.

Luke watched this from his seat at the bar, entranced in your private bubble amongst the chaos. You were smiling — a rare sight at all at camp — but this was one he didn’t think he’d ever seen in all his years of knowing you. It wasn’t filled with pride like the ones you tried to conceal when you got a new record on the climbing wall or you finally beat Clarisse in a training match, nor was it the satisfied smirk you had when you put an egotistical camper in their place or beat up jerks like Ethan. Your smile was alight with joy; relaxed and wholehearted happiness that spread through the room and seemed infectious to anyone who passed you.

It was at that moment that Luke truly understood how you were a daughter of Aphrodite. The way the lights reflected off your hair and your eyes, the easy way you moved your body to the music, everything about you suddenly seemed perfect, and he wondered how he’d never noticed it before. Your appearance hadn’t changed drastically; your hair was loose instead of the practical up-do needed for camp, you wore a tight fitted crop top instead of the camp shirt and you might’ve had some glitter smeared around your eyes. All inconspicuous, ordinary things, yet you seemed like a brand new person. Luke decided he liked this version of you, and if this whole plan failed, at least he’d gotten a glimpse into your real world and behind the facade you hid with at camp.

He was ripped from his thoughts when he saw you make a drinking gesture to your friend, heading towards him unwittingly. He turned in his seat hurriedly, trying to act cool and unaware. You spotted him almost immediately, persona switching up as disgust crept back under your skin.

“If you’re going to ask me out again, could you just get it over with now so I can get back to enjoying my night?” You sighed, grabbing the water bottles from the bartender.

“Would you mind? You’re kind of ruining this for me.” Luke gestured around, hoping his acting chops were as good as he needed. You ignored it either way.

“You’re not surrounded by your usual cloud of smoke,” You noted, curiosity getting the better of you.

“I quit. Apparently they’re bad for you.” You raised an eyebrow, almost too surprised to come up with a quip.

“You did?” You hated how genuine it sounded and turned to go, sensing him get up to follow you.

“You know, I was watching you out there before,” He yelled over the music, “I’ve never seen you look so sexy.” In possibly the worst timing in history, the song ended and the entire club was treated to Luke’s compliment. You both flushed red, and you were unable to contain a small giggle — wildly uncharacteristic for you. Luke, to his credit, only had a mildly sheepish grin on his face, and continued to follow you across the dance floor. “Come to the Apollo party with me.” You couldn’t believe him! Here you were, miles from camp and he was still asking you out. Though, you couldn’t deny that he wasn’t quite as infuriating as you originally thought.

“You never give up, do you?” You gave a good natured sigh, ducking under someone’s arm to get to your friends.

“Was that a yes?”

“No.”

“Was it a no?”

“No!” You let out another laugh which floated over the crowd and straight to Luke. He couldn’t contain his own grin.

“I’ll pick you up at 9:30!” He yelled back. You gave no indication of having heard him apart from a momentary glance, and he couldn’t tell if the smile was directed at him or just a byproduct of your situation. He took it either way.

Having gone to the effort of sneaking away from camp, Luke decided to stay for the remainder of the concert and grudgingly decided the band wasn’t that bad. Not his style, sure, but he could kind of see why you liked them. Besides, these drinks were easier to get than the contraband ones he had to smuggle into camp.

Tired from a night on your feet dancing and feeling your pleasant buzz slipping away, you were less than charmed seeing Luke waiting for your bus. It made sense, obviously you were going the same place, but you didn’t want him to ruin your great night by pestering you about a date.

“What are you doing here?” You asked bluntly, eagerly sitting on the misshapen little bench.

“Getting home?” He trailed off, unsure of what you were looking for. “Besides, we’re a long way from camp and it’s late. Didn’t feel right leaving you here alone.” You hated that you thought it was sweet.

“Do you not think I can take care of myself?” You picked a fight instead, unwilling to be genuine with him. Luke wasn’t stupid enough to fall for it.

“I have complete faith in you,” He laughed, ���I’m making sure you don’t kill whoever bothers you.” You let out a snort of a laugh accidentally. You tried to recover,

“It’ll be you if you’re not careful.” Somehow Luke didn’t believe you.

Surprisingly, the trip was almost pleasant. Luke had already gotten what he wanted from the night and the next phase of his plan was shaping up, so he knew bringing up your impending date would only sour your mood. Instead, when he plonked himself down in the seat next to you on the bus, you talked about mundane, silly things. He asked about the friends you were with and let you talk about your life in New York, waving you off when you started to feel guilty since he was at camp all year.

“There’s this really cool record store, we go there all the time. They have this huge bulletin board on one wall where these tiny little bands put up posters for random gigs with, like, fifty people there — it’s so sick, like the 90s I guess. Maybe —” You cut yourself off but Luke knew where you were going. Maybe I could show you. You would deny it if he brought it up, but he couldn’t contain his smile either way.

You were surprised that you had so much to talk about, briefly wondering why you’d never been friends with him before, but the conversation continued all the way to the camp border, where you both knew the risk of sneaking back in meant your night together was over. Once you got into camp there’d be people all around; campers should be in bed but counsellors often patrolled for a while, and many of the non-demigod folks around camp could be up and about well into the early hours of the morning.

“So, um, I’ll see you around?” His sudden shyness was unexpectedly charming, and you found yourself giving Luke a smile — a real one that made his heart flutter embarrassingly.

“Bye, Luke.” You held eye contact for a fraction longer than necessary before disappearing into the shadows. Luke watched you go, not quite starstruck but close to it. A rustle of the trees behind him spurred him into action, but the image of you on the dance floor played on repeat behind his eyes as he lay in his bunk.