#*skips away like the goddamn fairy prince i am*

[angelicamerlinbarnes]

Five, completely drunk and walking around the room to cuddle his entire family one or two at a time because let’s be honest Five Hargreeves turns into an absolute koala when drunk and there’s nothing you can do about it: I’ll be sappy whenever I want. I don’t give a shit. I love you. Fuck off.

The Hargreeves: *melting*

[quaggathemighty]

Stepsister, by Jennifer Donnelly: an emotional, messy review.

Recommended For: fantasy, ya, feminist, fairy tale, coming of age stories, girl protagonist, adventure lovers

         This will be as close to a spoiler-free review as I can make it.

"It's the hunger in our hearts that kills us."

Have you ever read a book that so thoroughly encompassed everything you ever wanted to put on paper? That ripped into the deepest part of you and dragged you along by your emotions until you're raw and hopeful and shattered and fired up all at once? Because I just have.

The Summary:

“Isabelle should be blissfully happy - she's about to win the handsome prince. Except Isabelle isn't the beautiful girl who lost the slipper and captured the prince's heart. She's the ugly stepsister who cut off her toes to fit into Cinderella's shoe... which is now filling with blood.

When the prince discovers Isabelle's deception, she's turned away in shame. It's no more than she deserves. She cut away pieces of herself in order to become pretty. Sweet. More like Cinderella. But that only made her mean, jealous, and hollow. Now she has a chance to alter her destiny and prove what ugly stepsisters have always known:

It takes more than heartache to break a girl."

My Thoughts:

Isabelle is not pretty. She's jealous and she struggles and while she fiercely loves her sister she often feels lost and afraid, or angry and hateful to the world that left her behind. She cut off her toes because her absolutely mad mother demanded it, heating a knife over the fire while she berates her into obeying, and as a result Isabelle's bitterness and jealousy might even kill her. But as the story unfolds she's also breathtakingly passionate and brave and confident and fiery, and she grows a lot over the course of the story, learning to set aside what everyone else has labeled her (and indeed sometimes what she's labeled herself because of their cruelty), to become her own woman. She's strong and real and well written, and I love her. I want to be her. Goddamn I want every girl to be her. To be their own Elizabeth, Yennenga, Abhaya Rani. Strong, brave, dangerous. Beautiful in their own right, and not always on the surface like the world wants.

"Each queen was once a girl like you. Told who to be and what to do. Not pretty, not pleasing, far too rough. Til wounded subjects, anguished dead, mattered more than things the others said. Then, like a flag, her will unfurled. Go now, girl. Remake the world."

UUUGHhhh. Can we just talk about this book PLEASE? Can this get more of a following so I can scream and rave and flail and ugly cry with more people who loved this book? Oh my god. There are so many things about this book I like, from the way she fought for and protected her sister, to the way she grew to see past the jealousy her mother instilled in her against Ella, to the way it doesn't pit the girls against each other for their vastly different strengths. Well, except for one, but I'll get to that.

The book opens up on what has to be one of the most heart-wrenching, cringe-worthy scenes I've ever read in a young adult novel, and it's that scene with the cutting of the feet and the bloody shoes (yes, from the original myth, this ain't no Disney remake, y'all, it gets gory and doesn't hide from it) is what made me actually come back and buy the book. Isabelle had me by the heartstrings the whole goddamn read. For a girl who never grew up as conventionally attractive, who was always too loud or too brash or never had the right interests (witchcraft, necromancy, and vampires, anyone? No? Don't hide your cringe years from me, I know you had them too), seeing a book properly take these oddities and this 'ugliness', and teach a young woman to learn to accept and even love these things about herself, even though it doesn't get her what she's been told she has to want, but instead pushes her to find her own path? Ugh. Yes. Give me a thousand more of these stories, I could do this all day.

Also, boyfriend cries and has open, deep emotions. What?? A young man in touch with his feelings, that doesn't have to be physically strong to be a good man, that is allowed to be physically weak and emotionally open, and have his own strengths and weaknesses that don't boil down to a six pack and a brooding personality? In a YA FANTASY BOOK?! Hold me.

I rooted for Isabelle the whole way though. I cringed with her, I held my breath, I cheered, I finished the book emotionally exhausted and ready to fucking fight. I haven't felt this pumped up after consuming a story or a piece of media since I went to see Captain Marvel for the first time in theaters, and hot damn, y'all, woman-centric stories that don't revolve around the approval of a man or the need to be petty and spiteful to other women are my jam . I will absolutely be shoving this book in the face of every woman, teenage girl, and preteen female I know, all but begging them to give this book a shot. I read the whole thing in one sitting, the same day I bought it just as a way to pass the time and... mmmm.

I'm gonna try and keep this as spoiler-free as possible, just because I don't want to give anything away, but yeah. On to the genuine criticisms.

Honestly? I didn't have that many. There were a couple of places where I was kind of annoyed, like the catty girl in the village that I wanted rid of, but the way it was handled in relation to Isabelle's story makes me more forgiving, if only for the way she learns to control her temper and not goad more fights out of people that don't really need an excuse. It bothers me that she has to just sit there and take it for her sister's sake, but... maybe that's just because it hits too close to home for some of us. It's a relatively small part of the book and I'm really not too fussed in the long run.

One thing that did throw me at first was the inclusion of the other points of view, like the skip from Isabelle's first chapter in the beginning to the introduction of "Chance," whose band of miscreants and misfits is a little distracting at first, but ultimately entertaining once you figure out how they're involved, and who serves as a sort of 'greater story' framing device for the real world conflicts taking place in the background. "Chance" and "Fate's" cat and mouse game ended up being one of my favorite parts of the underlying tensions in the story, and really helped drive home how make or break Isabelle's ultimate path was, even after she ended up going in a direction no one, not even herself, expected in the end. But it really added to the whole "we make our own path and only we can tell our story" message that ended up getting told as the underlying themes for the whole book. And I can thank it for that.

Right. Now. The big block quote I used up above. Chance decides he needs to tip the scales somewhat, and his whole part of the narrative so far as Isabelle can tell is as a rich eccentric trying to get his misfits and servants to help him put on a play. The play ends up... less a play, and more an inspirational third act speech meant to give Isabelle the push she needs to go and 'do the thing!', and as such it's... kind of cheesy, in hindsight. But at the same time while wrapped up in the story I didn't really notice it save to get super emotional and flaily about how many names were on that list that weren't centered around white western history, and I'm totally here for it. I am absolutely down with the cheese if it brings about the good feels, and the bolster to Isabelle's courage it gave delivered.

I also really like that one of the men driving the story kept pushing that love was what she needed, and automatically brought in a boy to do the job, but it ended up being Isabelle's love for her horse, herself, and her family, and the forgiveness of her step-sister, that really did the trick. Thank you so much Jennifer Donnelly, for not making this be about a man.

I really wish this review could do it more justice, but I'm pushing the limits of my word count as it is, and I don't want to risk repeating the ugly, happy blubbering I was doing at the end of the story. Suffice it to say I ABSOLUTELY recommend this book to anyone who likes fairy tales, feminist stories, girl-centered stories, coming of age stories, fantasies, everyone, really. I can't sum it up any better than Jennifer Donnelly herself in the forward of this book: "To everyone who's ever felt like they're not enough."

SNIIIIFFF. Now if you'll excuse me, I'm going to go eat a pint of ice cream and watch Xena: Warrior Princess reruns with my puppy. Peace!

[spnxmarvel-fanfic]

Fairytale!Destiel AU : Chapter Seven

Supernatural or Marvel

Pairing: Dean Winchester/Castiel (Destiel)

Warnings: talking about the sexualities 

Words: 1695

Description: Some things become clearer for Dean

Important A/N: this is a very important chapter. not necessarily to the fic, but to everyone finding out who they are. please be aware that i have not and will not experience all the different sexualities and gender identities, and this is just my best interpretation of them. I have also talked with a few friends about how they feel as a *blank* to help, and their experience may be different to others. thank you and I hope you enjoy the chapter.

chapters one, two, three, four, five, six

ao3

“What?!” Dean jumped up from the log, a look of confusion on his face. “I thought you were gay!”

Castiel raised an eyebrow. “Well, when you put it that way…”

The two boys had been discussing an all-female band that had recently visited the kingdom, which Castiel had managed to sneak Dean a ticket too. Away from him, of course.

But Dean had mentioned how ’hot’ the lead singer was, and Castiel dreamily agreed.

“But, I thought I- if you’re straight then how do you-” Dean stumbled, taking a step back on instinct.

Shaking his head and chuckling to himself, Castiel patted the spot beside him again, asking him to sit down. He waited until Dean had hesitantly done so before talking.

“Less, gay, more Asexual Panromantic,” Castiel smiled sweetly. This was a big step for them really, because despite knowing about how much they loved each other, neither were exactly ready for any kind of relationship.

“I’m going to assume that you’re not gay either?” Castiel teased, wondering how much the hunter actually knew about his sexuality.

“Those are some mighty big words,” Dean laughed nervously. “Well, I’ve never called myself gay. I mean, I like girls. But then there’s you, Cas,”

Castiel took in a sharp breath.

“You could be Heteroflexible, or uh, Heterosexual Demiromantic? Or-”

“Whoah whoah whoah, I don’t understand any of that,” Dean recoiled slightly. He’d heard of Heterosexual, but the others?

“Bisexual” Castiel finished

“Bi- bi what?” Dean forgot about his past confusion. There was something about that word.

“If you’re bisexual, you like men and women. ‘Bi’, as in two” Castiel looked over at Dean’s face, sliding a bit closer to him.

“Oh,” Dean said quietly, trying to let it sink in. It has a name. “ So, that’s what you think I am?”

“Dean, no one can tell you what you are. Experiment with the names. Find what makes you feel comfortable. You don’t have to know now. You could even call yourself Queer, if you can’t find a comfortable label, or if you don’t want a label at all,” Castiel comforted Dean, placing a gentle hand on his shoulder.

Dean took in a big gulp. “So is your dad uh, is he cool with all that? With your aces- uh, and pans?”

Chuckling, Castiel continued. “Oh yeah, he’s big on letting us be ourselves. To a degree, of course. Michael, who you’ve met, is actually genderfluid,” Castiel almost kept going, but he saw Dean’s confused face.

“Genderfluid is like… I can’t exactly do it justice explaining it, because I have never experienced it. It’s where someone sometimes feels comfortable in their body, being a girl for example, but other days they can’t stand their body, because that day they’re a boy. Then other days they might be both. Or neither,”

“That’s a thing?” Dean was struggling to get his father's words out of his head.

“Don’t be insensitive Dean.”

“I’m sorry, sorry,” Dean hung his head. Goddamn John and his-

“I’m sure it's okay, I guess this all new for you,” Castiel noticed his shame and quickly tried to fix his problem. And then he continued.

“Raphael, the third oldest, is transgender. He didn’t feel comfortable in the body he was born in, so he got some help from Chuck and my brothers to be a man. Chuck is bisexual as well actually,” Castiel added, nudging Dean.

“Bisexual,” Dean said, but his mind was far away. He was trying it out, seeing how it felt. “I’m- I’m Bi,”

“Like I said Dean, you don’t-”

“No!” Dean jumped up, from excitement this time. “No I mean- I mean it all makes sense now!” he turned to face Castiel, a look of pure joy across his face.

“Everything I’ve felt, all of these things and feelings that I’ve just dismissed, it all makes sense now. I- I can’t thank you enough, Cas,” Dean sat down again, sunbeams practically shining from his face, the happiest he’s been in years.

Looking at him with loving eyes, Castiel placed a hand on Dean’s hand, and his eyes widened in shock. Fearing that he was taking it too far, he went to take his hand away, but he found another hand on top of his. He looked up to see Dean giving Castiel the same look.

“Could you please explain what Asexual Panromantic means?” Dean shyly said in a small voice, earning another kind smile.

“Asexual means I don’t feel sexual attraction. I don’t want sex,” Castiel spoke a little nervously.

“What? No sex?” Dean tilted his head slightly, less accusing and more curious.

“Nope. I just don’t. If you wanted some, too bad,” Castiel forced a laugh out, trying to hide years of pain behind his eyes. Yes, he came from a supportive family. Doesn’t mean he understood it himself.

“I won’t force you to do anything you don’t want to,” Dean looked Castiel in the eyes, as serious as he could get, earning a nod and smile from the prince. “Now, tell me. You’re romantically attracted to kitchen appliances?”

“No,” Castiel laughed, shaking his head. “No. It means I could be romantically in love with anyone. Any gender, binary or non-binary,” he explained after letting himself cool down from laughing.

“But isn’t that-”

“Bisexual? Well, technically. Just because you’re Bi doesn’t mean you can’t love non-binary people. Some people feel more comfortable with the Pansexual label, rather than Bisexual,” Castiel could see this going over Dean’s head, but the boy was trying. That counted for everything.

“And non-binary is…” Dean trailed off, hoping Castiel would take the hint.

“People who don’t feel comfortable as a guy or a girl. They might be neither, both, or something completely different. There are also many cultures that don’t have just two genders, but that's a story for another day,” Castiel explained quickly. It was getting late, and he was tired. The constant worrying that his father would find out about everything was really getting to him. But once Castiel was eighteen, he and Dean would run off together. They’d already talked about it and agreed. The small steps they’d taken meant to world to them, and they never wanted to let it go.

Castiel hadn’t even realised they’d been silent for a few minutes, staring off at a small gap in the trees, when a shooting star flew by. Turning to Dean, he expected him to still be looking at the sky so he could say ‘make a wish’, but the hunter was already smiling at him.

“Cas, can I please kiss you?” Dean asked, and Castiel’s whole world stopped spinning. His breath hitched. His heart skipped a beat.

Unable to find words, he nods and watched as Dean bites his lip, staring as Castiel’s. Dean cupped Castiel’s head with one hand and leaned in. As they made connection, their eyes closed on instinct.

And it was every bit of perfect Castiel had hoped for. Dean’s lips, oh, his lips were so soft, were gentle with Castiel, and he was melting. Melting into the kiss and into Dean’s arms.

Both soon needed to break for air, and they rested their foreheads against one another. Castiel was suddenly conscious about his constantly chapped lips. But ultimately, the kiss was at the front of his mind.

“That was…” Castiel started, but Dean finished for him.

“Awesome,” Dean looked into Castiel’s eyes with a smile.

He smiled back at the hunter. At his hunter. And then they kissed again.

Dean walked into his house with the biggest grin on his face. As expected, his mother was in her room, most likely sewing. Grandpa Sam was snoozing in his chair, and Sam was- Sam? What was Sam doing at home? Sitting at the bench! There’s no way he’s getting away with lying about the biggest smile on his face ever.

“Dean! I’ve been waiting for you!”

“Uh, hiya Sammy,” Dean had stopped in his tracks, holding an empty hunting bag, failing at his attempts to mask his smile.

“What's got you beaming like a mini sun?” Sam teased, getting up from the bench, where he had been reading his book. “Also, why are you so late?”

“I could ask you why you’re so early,” Dean dropped his bag on the ground and held his arms out for a hug. Dean held his little brother tight.

“Not unless you tell me who put that massive grin on your face!” Sam argued.

SIghing, Dean walked to the bench and leaned on it, and Sam followed so he was facing his brother. “Whose home right now? Dad is-”

“Dad’s out like always. Why-”

“What would you say, Sammy, if I told you I was in love?” Dean spat out, cutting his brother off.

“Why would I care Dean? Like sure, that’s great. But-” Sam was getting a bit sick of the cutting off.

“With a guy,” Dean finished, searching his brother’s eyes for a reaction. A response. Anything.

Sam furrowed his brow for the shortest second, before turning nonchalant again. “So? Again. Do I care?” he sighed, rolling his eyes and grabbing his book again.

“You don’t mind me being…  you know, Bi?” Dean realised that he’d probably have to explain everything to Sam and-

“Again Dean, don’t care. I’m Bi too,” Sam answered, not looking up from his book as he took a spot on the couch. The older Winchester’s mouth went slack.

Due to the lack of comebacks, or any noise at all, Sam looked up to Dean and laughed. “Get over here! Are you going to tell me about this guy or not?”

Smiling as he regained muscle control to walk to Sam, Dean was trying to think of a way to explain the love of his life to his little brother, but it hit him.

Just start at the start, like all good fairy tales.

“Well…”

“Son, we need to talk,” Chuck said the minute Castiel stepped foot in the room. He had only just arrived back at his bedroom door when some of his father’s most trusted men came to escort him to the king’s chambers. A very rare event indeed.

Castiel gulped.

tags: @tardisheart134 @niteowlangel @asociopathandadoctor​ @waitwhyami​ @notfunnydean​  @leatherandapplepies​ @cross-roads-blues​ @astheryart @winchestered-since-1983 @sp0okyweek 

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