#*isn’t sorry I effed up my wording there meant the opposite.
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I’ll just say I never understood why so many fans say that other fans give Grian “too much trauma”. Like. I feel like you could say that about literally any of the life series characters yet I ONLY really see it said about Grian? Why are we not allowed to give Grian Specifically any trauma. I don’t get it.
#trafficblr#life series#life series grian#like okay. I know he’s like. pretty silly and has fun in the series. so maybe ‘trauma’ makes him look ooc?#but once again I FEEL LIKE YOU COULD SAY THAT ABOUT A LOT OF CHARACTERS….#like only a few ppl tend to RP the ‘trauma’ more and yet everyone EXCEPT Grian is ‘ooc’ for being portrayed like that?#*isn’t sorry I effed up my wording there meant the opposite.#even tho I’d argue he does have some scenes that feel like… idk… giving him trauma makes sense?#I know this is somehow related to watcher lore. but like… the watcher stuff can be traumatic. if u don’t like it just say u don’t like#watcher grian. why do you have to say u don’t like TRAUMATIZED grian when you MEAN you don’t like WATCHER grian.#you don’t like watcher grian because you think angst makes him OOC? I have no idea what goes on in ur brain genuinely.#DID YOU KNOW PEOPLE CAN MAKE ANGST AND STILL SEE THE CHARACTER AS PRETTY HAPPY. CUZ IRL TRAUMATIZED PPL CAN STILL BE HAPPY.#‘oh but they only show him being angsty and traumatized’ YOURE LOOKING AT THEIR ANGST ART IDK WHAT YOU EXPECTED.
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DCOM Rankings #92: Teen Beach Movie
This received a lot of hype when it came out, though not nearly as much as camp rock or HSM. But it tried to be the next big DCOM Sumer musical. And from my knowledge I think it was pretty popular, again, just not as much as previous musical movies.
Still, I remember a high school friend saying that she was obsessed with the movie, and even though I didn’t watch Disney channel anymore, it still intrigued me. So I was curious to watch it for this ranking. My thoughts are as follows:....
The first half was good, the second half fell flat.
Ok review is over!!
No I kid.
So let’s talk about the overall story and themes. You got a girl with a dead mom (of course) who wants her to fullfill her dreams and be successful, but never really specifies beyond that. From a young age, Mack carried that journal with her as her one true reminder of her mom, and got it in her head that she needed to be successful like her aunt that raised her, as if that’s what her mom meant. Over the course of the movie, she figures out that she likes being on the beach and surfing, and wants to stay where she knows she belongs. And she realized that was probably what her mom really meant.
I love the concept of a girl thinking that she needs to be something her whole life, because her dead mom said so. I think it’s so powerful how kids can just attach to that as if it will still make them closer together. And take those words to heart. That to me is great (thematically, not actually) and the way it’s portrayed at the beginning of the movie is pretty solid, with its own DCOM cringiness. She was willing to leave the town she loved to “become successful” like what her mom wanted, and if she didn’t fullfill that, it’s like she’s severed her last connection with her.
I WISH THIS WAS SHOWN/SAID IN THE MOVIE A FUCK TON MORE!!!
Idk I feel like we should have gotten more context in the beginning, I felt like we were kinda thrown into the movie world a little too early. Maybe not, idk. Now I’m second guessing myself. I guess I just wish Mack explained this more to Brady to make him understand why she needs to leave their beach town. Because throughout the movie she kept saying she needs to leave because “she has to” and that’s pretty much it. She could have said “cuz this is what my mom wanted and I want to make her proud of me” OOF, right in the feels. Maybe she can say “has to” near the end when she isn’t sure anymore and is tired of explaining it. Maybe it’s me just not being attached to any of the characters that much that I need them to be more motivated.
But let’s move onto something else, the movie and movie world. So it’s based loosely on west side story. Now I don’t know that much about west side story, and I know that I need to edumacate myself, but i think the overall theme is there, right? Two different groups of people, two people from those groups fall in love and start a gang war. But I don’t know any of the specifics other than that. But yeah this movie within a movie is supposed to be set in the early 60’s, and there are times when it kinda looks like it, and there are times when you don’t believe it at alll...I think mostly because beaches look the same regardless of time period but yeah. The editing for this DCOM is not very good, and you know they’ve been trying to add more visual effects over the years and 2013 was still in the early stages of that for TV, so I’m not going to be too critical of it, but it’s mostly how the characters dress and talk doesn’t seem very 60’s a lot of the time. But hey what do I know? I wasn’t alive in the 60’s.
I do NOT like the weather machine side plot though. I thought that was really really stupid. But I do understand that there needed to be a common enemy for the two groups to work together to fight, but mad scientists and a weather machine is the best they could come up with??? They were in the movie for like 5 minutes total I would say. They have 0 motivation, they are only used to get the two groups to get along, and they are used as an excuse for the storm. That’s it. The villains are just devices and not actual characters. Like I don’t need a sob story for a villain to get behind them, just someone at least interesting...I mean, I know the movie within the movie is supposed to be really cheesy and dumb, but you can still have interesting characters.
I do however like the way that Mack and Brady call out some of the bull crap that’s in these movies sometimes, like how they suddenly know what’s going to happen next even though they couldn’t have known, in order for the movie to move forward. It’s so meta haha I like it a lot. At least the writers have some idea of what’s up.
The characters. I did mention it a bit earlier. Mack is probably my favorite (again, it’s not like she’s my favorite character ever, like by any means). And the main biker girl I forget her name. She is really cute and her mannerisms and looks are perfect for the time period I think. The boy characters kinda suck. I mean Brady has a point that he didn’t realize Mack was even leaving until the night before she was supposed to leave. Like,I feel like that’s something you should mention when you meet someone you wanna date??? “Oh by the way I have to leave in a year for school so I’m not going to be here long” like was it that effing hard to say???
Sorry off topic. Brady just loves surfing and having fun on the beach, and that’s about it. Oh and he loves this movie a lot so when they get trapped in it he already knows the context. So that’s basically it. Mack is pretty much the only real character in the entire DCOM and everyone else is just used as a prop to get her where she needs to go. BUT it doesn’t mean I hate all the rest of the characters, in fact I find pretty much all of them to be entertaining, except for the villains who are really useless.
Let’s talk about the aunt and the grandpa for a second. So they made a deal that mack would stay with her grandpa for her first two years of high school, and then she would go with her aunt to this new school for her last two years. Alright, cool. I thought grandpa would have more of a presence in the movie, or talk more to Mack about....well anything. But I guess not? He just stands there and watches Mack get swallowed by the wave and seems to be told to act sad. Sorry my mind is all over the place. Anyway, Mack says at the end of the movie that she wants to stay where she is and the aunt is like okay, even though her character was all stiff and huffy and uptight. Like you’re not even gonna put up a little fight??? Things don’t go this well in real life, I hope kids know this.
Okay ranting over lol. The songs were pretty good, not the absolute best I’ve ever heard but they’re good, just not catchy enough I guess. It’s just trying too hard to be HSM but it’s fine I guess. At this point nothing can top the HSM songs, so I won’t knock off too many points for that. I really do like the twist in the middle where Mack and Brady mess up the movie, but it basically ends up not mattering later (something I’m also mad about) but for a while I was like ooooooooo spicy! And I also like how Mack gave the biker girl advise about boys and standing up for yourself and doing things because you want to, not cuz someone else told you to, which directly applies to her own life. Clever stuff man.
Alright time for an overall grade. I gave this one a straight B because even though I did rant about this movie a lot, I felt weird giving it a C. There is slightly more going for it than against it. It’s still a fun summer movie, and it’s not meant to be taken too seriously, just like camp rock 2. And that’s alright in my book! I just wish this one put more heart and meaning to it, but it was definitely itself entertaining with some classic DCOM cheesy and cringey elements.
One last thing I forgot to mention: I guess they don’t allow lip kissing anymore (I’m sure I mentioned this before) all the main character couples do is hold hands and hug and stare into each other’s eyes. Like who the eff made that decision that all kissing was banned? (Cheek kisses are still a thing but wtf) I’m just ugh did parents complain or something? Is kissing seriously too gross for Disney channel, even if it’s just a peck? What the poop?? Ughh second rant over.
So the next DCOM looks like a snowboarding movie which is like the complete opposite of this movie about surfing, just thought that was funny! I’m going to challenge myself and see if I can get the rest of these movies done by September 1st, but at the rate I’m going now, I doubt it...but we’ll just have to see. Wish me luck lol
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For Better or Worse
I FIXED IT! I had to help my poor children through this cringe-fest. No akuma and these two have an actual effing conversation about their feelings!
MAJOR SPOILERS if you haven’t seen Puppeteer 2 yet.
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This day was turning into a nightmare. What was Alya thinking? Marinette couldn’t confess right now. So many things weren’t right! Even with Tikki’s encouraging words Marinette still found a black hole of doubt swirling in her chest. She left the bathroom repeating that she could do this if only to help her convince herself that this wasn’t insane.
She looked up and saw Adrien across the room. “Huh?” Marinette got closer, “They finished the statue already? I thought it was gonna take longer. That’s the whole reason we all got to come here in the first place.”
It was an incredible likeness. She stood to admire it for a moment before an idea popped into her head. Maybe it wouldn’t be so bad if she could practice her confession on the Adrien statue before confronting the real thing.
“Okay. A little practice never hurt anyone. Not like anyone’s around to see me put my foot in my mouth.” Marinette looked around to make sure no one was watching. “Hello Adrien, it’s me, uh, Marinette. No--he knows who you are already!” Marinette chastized herself.
“Focus, Marinette!” she took a deep breath and turned back to the statue. “Uh hey, Adrien, sorry for running off so suddenly. I saw the finished figure back on the main floor. You look good! I mean it looks good! Not to say you don’t look good but--”
Marinette dropped her head into her hands. “Why is this so hard?”
She stared back at the statue and sighed. “Figures, I can’t even tell a wax figure how I feel. Even if he rejects me I want him to know though. It’s not just a little crush but real admiration. I--I--”
She squared her shoulders and looked at the statue. They even got the exact right shade of green for his eyes. “Adrien, I...I like you. Not just as a friend. I’ve had a crush on you since you gave me your umbrella that rainy day after school. Getting to know you over the time we’ve spent together has only solidified what I feel. You’re sweet and kind and brave. You see the best in everyone and have the patience of a saint. Especially with me. That’s why this is so hard, trying to tell you how I feel without spewing word vomit. I get nervous because while the fantasy in my head is nice, it can come crumbling down with one word from you. Now more than ever I feel like I need that fantasy. I’m under so much pressure with things I can’t even tell anyone about.”
She placed a hand on Wax-Adrien’s cheek. The wax was still warm it seems. “I like you, Adrien. I hope that you can like me the same way.”
She leaned closer as if to kiss him but stopped. “Stupid.” she muttered and shuffled past him towards the elevator.
“Wait!” A hand grabbed her wrist. She turned back and saw that the Adrien statue was holding her. Wait. Not a statue.
IT! WAS! NOT! A! STATUE!
“Adrien?” Marinette’s brain started to fry. He was playing a prank! Of course they didn’t finish the statue that fast! He was just trying to play a harmless prank and she--oh no!
“Marinette, I--”
“Why didn’t you say something?” She wretched her arm away from him, “That wasn’t funny, Adrien! Not funny at all!”
She ran back toward the elevator. “Goodness, I’m such an idiot!” She slammed the button for any other floor. The doors started to shut but a hand shot through and pried them back open.
“Marinette, wait, please,” Adrien begged as he jumped into the elevator. The doors slid shut behind him blocking Marinette’s exit. “I’m sorry. It was meant to just be a prank. I thought it may cheer you up.”
Marinette squeezed herself into the farthest corner of the elevator. “Why would I need cheering up?” she muttered.
“Because uh,” Adrien fiddled with his ring, “I thought you were mad at me. What Nino said and then you taking off like that I thought that maybe I had done something wrong. That you hated me for some reason. The prank was supposed to lighten the mood I guess.”
“I don’t hate you.” Marinette looked past him at the elevator key pad. In her rush she had hit one of the topmost floors. This elevator wasn’t exactly speedy either. She was stuck with this conversation whether she liked it or not.
“I gathered as much,” Adrien stood in the corner opposite of her. “Did you really mean all that? What you said when you thought I was a statue?”
Now was the time to deny. Deny everything and let this whole mortifying experience die in a hole where it belongs.
But Marinette didn’t want to deny it. It was the truth. Every single bit of it. “I can’t lie to you, Adrien. I...I did mean it. I meant every word.”
There was a long silence.
“Say something,” she squeezed her eyes shut, “Please.”
“Sorry, I was letting it sink in.” He finally said. “I guess I wasn’t expecting a confession today.”
“This is exactly why I didn’t want to say anything. I knew it would ruin everything.” Marinette slumped to the ground. “I feel so stupid.”
“No, you’re not,” Adrien sat down next to her, “To be honest I was rather shocked. I thought you liked Luka.”
“Luka is great.” Marinette shrugged, “But he isn’t you.”
She dared to meet his eyes once more. He was looking at her with a mixture of awe and pity. “And I’m not Kagami.”
“Kagami?” Adrien’s eyebrows raised, “What does Kagami have to do with you confessing to me?”
“Adrien, please, I know you like her. I helped you go on a date with her for goodness sake.” that dark curling snake of jealousy constricted around her heart.
“Right…” he stared back at the ground, “If you’ve liked me for as long as you’ve said then why did you help me? Why would you offer to help set me up with someone else?”
She drew her knees up to her chest, “Because seeing you happy means more to me than my crush. If I can’t be the one to make you happy then I’d rather see you with someone who could. It doesn’t matter what I feel in that instance. It’s not my heart.”
“Marinette,” Adrien hesitated to put on a hand on her shoulder, “I don’t deserve you.”
“Don’t try and--”
“I mean it!” he turned to her fully so he was kneeling in front of her, both of his hands clasped on her shoulders, “You said how I was kind and brave but you are ten times that. You are without a doubt one of the kindest, bravest, most talented, passionate, and selfless people I have ever met. You are so confident and driven that I can’t help but look at you in wonder. The only person I can think of coming anywhere close to how incredible you are is Ladybug herself. But you don’t need a suit or powers to be amazing. You’re our everyday Ladybug...my everyday Ladybug.”
Marinette was at a loss for words. Would it be too much to cry right now?
The doors pinged open and Alya and Nino were standing there waiting with Manon between them.
“Oh hey,” Alya surveyed the scene, “We were helping Theo look for Adrien but you seem to be in good hands.”
“Alya!” Marinette made a break for the door.
“See you back down in the studio!” Alya was quicker and hit the button for the studio floor. She gave Marinette a wink before the doors shut again. Adrien and Marinette alone again for another long trip back down.
“I am going to kill her.” Marinette banged her head against the door.
“Is that what they were talking about before?” Adrien asked, “The whole thing about leaving us alone together was to…”
“Give me a chance to confess. Yes.” Marinette turned back around, “Not that she told me that earlier. Which is why I panicked and bolted earlier.”
“I still don’t fully understand.”
“Alya and Nino thought they were helping because I’ve been trying for months to tell you how I feel--”
“Not that.” Adrien interrupted her, “I wonder how someone as spectacular as you could see so much in someone as lame as me.”
“You are not lame, Adrien.” Marinette smiled as she took her place sitting back across from him. “You are probably the least lame person I know.”
“You only say that because you like me.”
“No, I don’t. Also, this self-deprecating behaviour of yours has to stop. You are a wonderful individual. You’re a master fencer, you play piano beautifully, you’re fluent in Chinese, and you’re a talented voice actor as well as a model.”
“Only because my father has me practice all those things until I’m perfect at them.”
“What about video games? You’re second only to me, after all. You’re also insanely smart. I think that you and Max are the only ones who got straight A’s on their report cards last term. That is all you, Adrien.”
He finally smiled at her again. “Not to say you don’t have a dorky side too. You’re still socially awkward and make dumb jokes from time to time but it’s cute.”
“You’re not perfect either. You can get a bit scatter brained when caught off guard and you seem to have an intimate relationship with the floor.” he smirked in a way that made her heart race.
“Oh, it’s like that is it?” She laughed, “You know in the anime world my clumsiness would be seen as adorable and endearing.”
“You watch anime?” Adrien’s head perked up, “I didn’t know that about you.”
The rest of the elevator ride was spent in comfortable conversation. It went from them talking about what anime shows they liked to other interests. Music, food, video games, favorite puns. By the time they reached the studio floor again they were leaning on one another howling with laughter with bad joke after bad joke.
“Okay. Okay. I got another one.” Adrien said as he and Marinette got off the elevator, “What do you call a fake noodle?”
“What?” Marinette giggled.
“An impasta!” the two broke down into hysterics again.
“It’s so dumb!”
“If it’s so dumb then why is it so funny?”
“I got one. What kind of tea is the hardest to swallow?”
“Reali-tea?” Adrien guessed.
“Boo! You stole my joke!” she pounded on his chest.
“Get better jokes then,” he grabbed her hands to stop their assault. “I could send you a link to a site I know. The best kind of bad jokes you’ll ever find.”
“Adrien, there you are.” Theo walked up to them, “Where did you go?”
“Oh sorry,” Adrien smiled in apology, “I, uh, got stuck in the elevator.”
“Well, you’re back now. Come then, I’d like to get your figure done today.”
They walked back into the studio. Nino, Alya, and Manon had yet to make it back. Adrien placed his other hand inside the mold. “Now don’t go running off this time. I need to go grab more wax.”
With that Marinette and Adrien were alone once again.
“Hey, Marinette?” Adrien said.
“Yeah?” she plopped herself into a chair next to him.
“We kinda got off-track earlier in the elevator. I just started gushing about you and then you said all those sweet things to me and then we started with the jokes and well…” he took a deep breath, “I think we still need to address the elephant in the room.”
“Right,” Marinette was hoping that they may have just forgotten about her confession with all the other stuff that had happened, “You have an answer for me?”
“I feel like I need to explain first.”
Oh that was a great way to start this! He was gonna break her heart, wasn’t he? Of course he doesn’t like you like that! He’s crushing on Kagami! Stupid! Stupid!
“Stop that.” Adrien’s voice broke her from her thoughts.
“Huh?”
“You’re panicking. I can see it in your eyes.” he motioned for her to come closer. He took her hand with his free one, “There’s nothing for you to be scared about.”
“Don’t give me false hope like that.”
“I mean it.” he held her hand tighter, “You’re amazing, Marinette. What all I said before I meant it. I just never thought of you that way.”
“Adrien…”
“That’s not what I meant!” he pulled her closer so she couldn’t run away again, “I mean with Luka and my own warring feelings I just never explored what I felt for you more deeply. You were my friend and that’s all I thought there was to it.”
“Were?” Her heart started to beat faster.
“Yeah,” Adrien looked deep into her eyes, “You...you’re great. You mean a lot to me and I--I--I think I--I don’t know. It’s all happening so fast that I can’t think straight. All I do know is that I like you. I like you as a friend but also not. There’s something there. Something has always been there like a detail in a painting you never noticed before that changes how you see the rest of it.”
“What are you saying?” She didn’t dare so much as breathe at that moment.
“I feel something for you. I may not have it all figured out now but I’d like to.” the bell dinged and he released his hand from the mold. He held both her hands in his. “Can we talk about this? Really talk about it? Say somewhere more private and over a plate of cookies?”
“I’d like that.” she touched her forehead to his. “I’d like that a lot.”
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(Read the rest on AO3)
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Bumblebee was always the plan part 2
It’s time to continue with my controversial posts. When I began writing this, it was intended to be mostly a response to arguments I see around and EF’s. Then my pretty confrontational post that had led to say to a friend “Thankfully no one reads my blog” became much bigger than I ever expected. There’s a good chance I would have gone for a different tone had I known it would get 500x the usual view of… 1, which is usually mine. This been said, it would have been a mistake. Still, I feel like I have to address some points that seem to have confused a few people and this is definitely to do that.
But first, soothing music to prevent knee-jerk reactions.
Let’s start with a claim that was kind of controversial: the suggestion that Blake could still turn out to be a lesbian instead of bi or pan as some claimed this was in itself bi erasure. I understand where this complaint comes from as bisexuality was basically considered to not exist in media, for example, Sex and the City has an episode where all the main characters but Samantha treat it as something alienating and a way to still be in the closet. Yeah, some episodes have not aged well. And I’ve lost count of the number of people that still don’t consider it a thing, even among progressive fandom like Janelle Monae’s and Crazy Ex-Girlfriend’s (I just gave you 2 bi anthems1). Just so we’re clear, even though I do think Blake is bothsexual (let’s see if someone recognizes that reference), I have to put on table of her being a lesbian as some gay people have dated members of the opposite sex for a very long time, and there’s high probability some of them were abused in said relationships. I can’t ignore those experiences (I suppose I can, but I shouldn’t and hopefully never will).
Black Sun: the ship that didn’t sail
Again, there were a few that didn’t like that I compared BB and BS, which they interpreted as a dick contest. That really wasn’t my goal. I did that because those were the ships involving Blake that had a chance to happen (Catmeleon and Enabling-abuse2 were not on the table) and I was arguing for Bumblebee having been the plan all along (which, to me, implies that Black Sun was meant to be a red herring, though I didn’t flat out say it – sorry, I didn’t think I needed to). The point was to illustrate how there had been hints for Bumblebee.
I argued for that way before volume 6 by pointing out several clues like the dance arc, the songs and the injury. At the time, someone asked me how I could know BB wasn’t the red herring. There are 2 reasons why:
While it’s not lacking in hints and foreshadowing, they are (mostly3) on the subtle side when compared to the very obvious Sun’s crush on Blake;
They’re a LGBTQ+ pairing. There are huge double standards when it comes to LGBTQ+ in comparison to hetero ones – many people will deny the first one until it’s impossible to do so. The point of the bait and switch is to have a little twist and you can’t have that if a significant part of your audience notices the switch, but doesn’t see the bait.
And if you have doubts about the last point, remember: in 6x11, Adam attacked Yang out of jealousy, then Blake held her hand while making a speech that put them as equal in contrast to Blake-Adam, a relationship where one of them constantly tried to make the other feel small (the point of the infamous speech). There were many denying BB. Then, he tried to make Yang feel insecure about Blake by telling her she had made the same promise to him and asked the super platonic question: “What does she even see in you?” and people still tried to deny it. In the last episode, Blake and Yang spent the time holding each other’s hands and yet, there were still people denying it. Not that I’m complaining, since it only increased my celebration time. It was like: episode 6x11, “yeah! Bees” for 3 days, the internet crashed my party for one, then 6x12, “yeah! Bees! This time is for sure” for another 3 days, again I had my enthusiasm dashed and finally, “yeah! Bees”. That time it stuck. So thanks guys! It would have been bad if by 6x13 I had already used all my fireworks.
If you thought BS was going to happen – that’s normal, because it was the bait. If I am aware that people tend to think of others as straight until proven otherwise, why do you think the writers aren’t? I may not live in the same country as them, but I still consume a lot of USA’s media and I know that if guy stalks girl, he usually gets her. Not to mention, the number of times media announces a LGBTQ+ character as tactic to gain some support yet deliver nothing, like saying Dumbledore is gay even though there’s nothing in the films or books indicating it (let’s leave the conversation about the ���word of God” for some other time). There were more than a few LGBTQ+ people who were afraid Bumblebee would turn out to be just that: queerbaiting.
Miles and Kerry knew all of that and, more importantly, they were aware that you knew it too, so they played on your assumptions to make their bait-and-switch. However, there were plenty of hints that Sun was just the red herring and that Bumblebee was going to happen. Last time, I focused on the latter, this time let’s concentrate on the first. Let’s take a look at Sun and Blake’s relationship, shall we?
Sun was introduced in the last episodes of V1 and Blake trusted him immediately, because… he’s a Faunus. Though she told him about herself and the White Fang, he showed immediately he’s not on the same page as her as Faunus rights mean a lot to her and little to nothing to him. In 2x01, Sun talks to Neptune about Blake and concluded “and the best part is she’s a Faunus”, which goes completely against Blake’s words in the next episode “I want people to see me for who I am, not what I am”. She began going on a downward spiral to which he reacts with “Is she being all Blake-y?”, while Yang’s the one who gets through to her by exposing her own vulnerability.
Sun not fully understanding Blake is something the show hammers in our heads quite a few times even in more recent volumes. Like when he assumed she’s on her way to fight the White Fang when she was actually going to Menagerie to rest. Or suggested destroying the WF while Blake wanted to take it back.
In volume 3, they had literally no interactions besides him winking at her in the Vytal Festival – yes, she blushed, which can be explained by the fact that he did it in front of an entire stadium or that she had a crush on him. Personally, I’m inclined to the latter, but it really doesn’t mean much: not all crushes lead to something. A lot of them are a result of idealization and I think that was the case for Blake. By the way, I have to speak of Blake’s crush as likely, not certain precisely because it was never actually confirmed.
When Yang asked Weiss where Blake and Ruby were, Sun was there, yet it was Yang alone who went after Blake. The next time we saw him, it’s after their injuries and he is noticing an injured Blake grabbing Yang’s hand.
No, this shot doesn’t exist to show Sun seeing Blake injured, because he already knew that. He had just told Ruby that Yang was going to be OK, and the one who brought her there was Blake. Not to mention that if the point was to make him notice Blake’s injuries, it makes no sense for their hands to appear. Yang would have been kept out of the frame, instead of taking up more space than Blake. To me, this is the moment where Sun realizes Blake’s feelings for Yang. If the intention was for him to notice Blake’s injured, it would have made much more sense to see his face, then cut to her. Yes, they could have done the same with their hands, but this way they left it more ambiguous which was probably the intention. It would have made no sense for them to choose that if it was meant for Black Sun, because the audience was more than aware he was interested in Blake. We had been since V1 as there was never anything subtle about their relationship.
In volume 4, he flirts, Blake is usually either apathetic or downright annoyed. The exception is after the injury, and like I said, he’s the one who brings up Yang, revealing he realizes the bond between them. He is also hurt by the chick whose feelings weren’t reciprocated (I talked about that at length in part 1). In volume 5, their relationship is platonic.
Really, in spite of spending the volumes 4 and 5 together, it’s not about developing Black Sun in a romantic way.
Oh, a kiss on the cheek isn't romantic. It can be, but in the context, it was merely a "thank you".
Black Sun hasn’t sunk yet
While RWBY isn’t over, the possibility for Black Sun isn’t completely gone, though I don’t think I’m lying when I say it’s unlikely. You can like it more than Bumblebee, but it’s all right to admit it’s improbable. We (almost) all have been there. For crying out loud, in MHA, I sort of ship Kacchako4 (loses 2/3 of her readers – and that’s why this piece of trivia was originally intended to appear much later).
After everything he’s done for her (that she didn’t ask for)
This is usually phrased in a disgusting way.
There is a lot to unpack here.
First, it’s ridiculous to think you can be owed love/getting into someone’s panties. You can’t. People either love you/want to do you, or they don’t. If you want to do something for someone else, great, but do it because you want to and like (not necessarily in a romantic way) said person or because you’re altruistic – don’t expect a reward. This is what you sound like to us:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YWFfrQtHag0
You wanted the guy to get the girl, fine. You know you can watch that in almost everything else, right?
Second, it’s idiotic to associate getting the girl with masculinity or not getting her with being “cucked”. If your notion of being a man is tied to getting someone else, that’s on you. If you need someone else to feel good about yourself, maybe you have some underlying issues to address (another reference to Crazy Ex-Girlfriend – watch the show, especially if you’re making comments like the one I showed: you need it. I feel like the narrator in “S.O.B.s”).
Third, even by the logic of “after everything I’ve done for you”, Sun doesn’t win, because Yang paid a much bigger price: she lost an arm and had PTSD while he had a minor injury from which he had basically recovered by the next episode. This isn’t a “Yang deserves her” either – that argument is nonsensical no matter the pairing being defended, I’m just pointing out that it doesn’t even favor BS.
By the way, I noticed that a few people completely missed the point of why I compared Yang’s injury to Sun’s and think I did it to indicate Yang deserves it more or to win (?). It’s a bit confusing because I flat out say why I made the comparison, but here it goes again: it’s not to say Yang deserves Blake, but to indicate that, in fiction, we usually associate romance with higher stakes. I literally wrote:
“I think Yang’s and Sun’s injuries are everything I should need to prove the likelihood of BB as they contrast the two main Blake ships: Bumblebee and Black Sun. While heroes tend to save many people who are indeed just friends or sometimes not even that, there’s a reason why Superman and Spiderman usually include Lois Lane and MJ (or whoever the love interest is in said film) in the climax – it makes it more personal, raising the stakes. From this perspective, it’s easy to understand the importance given to either by comparing: what the injury was, who caused it, why and Blake’s reaction, thus allowing to conclude which couple was given more weight.”
“[…] point Bumblebee as the first one is more associated with romance.”
That was me explaining what the points were as well as why I was comparing the 2.
And yes, paying attention to dramatic weight is completely valid, we are talking about fiction after all. It’s not like we accidentally walked in on a guy threatening a gal and saying “I’ll destroy everything you love… starting with her” as another woman appeared in real life. Things happened the way they did because writers (editors, directors, etc.) wanted them to.
Don’t pretend you didn’t know that it’s relevant that the one who caused Yang’s injury was Adam, Blake’s ex-boyfriend, while Sun’s was caused by Ilia, the friend whose feelings weren’t reciprocated, and that it doesn’t say anything about the links Adam-Yang and Sun-Ilia. I lost count of the number of BSers who wanted Sun to fight Adam and wanted him to be the one taking Adam down (even though it got in the way of Yang’s closure), which shows many of you were perfectly aware of the importance of said connection.
As for the dyke representation… (the fact that they phrased it that way is very telling) if it was just that, then any lesbian couple would do. RWBY is about 4 female characters. Seriously, how come people never ask themselves why this one is so popular, even though Yang and Blake aren't the most popular characters? From what I've seen, Weiss and Yang are.
The claims of “pandering” and “SJW” have been raining for a while and I expect them to continue until they realize CRWBY can’t be bullied into erasing BB. Count on that to happen whenever a show reveals a main character is LGBTQ+ mid-series (unless it’s a particularly progressive show). If your reaction to seeing LGBTQ+ characters is to call it “pandering”, it says a lot about you, none of it good.
I know that we perceive straight white male as default. This is so entrenched in our culture that the first Transformers didn’t have any female transformers because the writers thought it would require an explanation. Yup, apparently you need an explanation to include half of the world’s population.
I suppose screaming “pandering” is better than to pull an EF and say “Bumblebee was and is the safest LGBTQ ship they could have done. Lesbian couples are the safest representation a show can make […] It’s more comfortable to see woman on woman action just because of how fantasized they are”, which:
doesn’t justify why BB is the safest LGBTQ+ couple as there are a ton of lesbian couples possible (White Rose, Checkmate/Monochrome, Freezerburn, etc.);
fails to consider the high number of LGBTQ+ women in RWBY when compared to LGBTQ+ men probably has something to do with the fact it has more female characters;
when did we see woman on woman action in RWBY? How did I miss that episode?
if lesbians are so appealing to straight men, how come they’re the ones whining the most about BB?
The whole straight-men-like-lesbians while being the ones complaining about them is particularly odd to me. It doesn’t sound like they like they are spending their time wrapped up in sexual fantasies. Maybe they are and can't stop. And that's why they don't like Bumblebee anymore... Poor things... But really, it just sounds like they need some kind of… safe space.
You can tell them not to worry. They still have most shows/books/films. And for the next 2-4 decades, they'll be able to count on Disney (taking shots at it since my very first post).
As usual, the original.
More RWBY posts:
Filmmaking and Bumbleby
Bumblebee was Always the Plan
Bumblebee was Always the Plan part 2
Faunus and the White Fang: The Portrayal of Racism
BB & Renora
Weird Post on Weiss’s Clothes
Foils: Adam and Yang (this one is in wordpress; it was my first one and I didn’t have Tumblr then)
Let’s talk about Adam Taurus (I didn’t post this one on Tumblr because the title and tags could lead Adam fans thinking this was about “his wasted potential” when really it defends the decision of killing him off and explains why it happened)
1 “Make me Feel” can also be taken as a pan anthem as Janelle as identifies as such (and I think she’s OK with being called bi too).
2 Enabling Abuse is what I call AdamxBlake.
3 I still consider “Burning the Candle”, V3 finale and the ship named “Pride” to be pretty obvious.
4 Not only are the odds against Kacchako (BakugoxUraraka), the shippers are considered villains who worship chaos, which is fine by me. I can’t say some part of me doesn’t enjoy being The Dark Knight’s Joker and that part is saying: “Tell me Batman, how does it feel to be the hero of a film that everyone watches for its villains?”
#Bumblebee was always the plan#bumbleby#let me 🐝 your bmblb#rwby bmblb#bisexual erasure#heteronormativity#rwby6#bmblb#rwby spoilers#blake belladonna#yang xiao long#rwby writing#yang x blake#blake x yang#rwby lgbtq#rwby lgbtq+#rwby bumblebee
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CHAPTER TWELVE
~ x JUDGMENT x ~
"I thought you were leading up to something more."
Makoto smirked across the table as she sat back in her chair. "Why, whatever do you mean, Onee-sama?"
Clearly irritated by the formal tone her sister had taken, Sae crossed her legs in the opposite direction to abate the sudden discomfort. "You and Kawakami were kissing on your bed. That painted a very specific picture of the events that would unfold."
"So now you're mad that I didn't meet your expectations? That she didn't push me down and force me into anything? That's nice, Sis."
"Not 'mad'. But that was my hypothesis, and it's… I'll have to adjust my thinking." Then she smirked a little and sat back, unconsciously mirroring her little sister's movements. "I am curious about something else, though."
"Really? Is it the leftover duck? I was a little surprised you didn't ask about that."
"No, no. And I was just thankful that it was delicious." She noticed Makoto's eyebrows shot up at the unexpected praise, but pressed onward. "Why does her teasing about feet get to you so much?"
At that, her little sister looked like her little sister for the first time since she had walked in the door, deflating and scowling toward the corner. "Come on, do we have to talk about that? I swear, I just really liked giving her a massage; she enjoyed it so much! It has nothing to do with me being 'into' feet!"
"Sure it doesn't," she snorted. "Mostly, I'm surprised to be learning all these things about you. It's fascinating."
"Don't be fascinated by things that aren't real," she sighed.
"Maybe not. I suppose you should finish telling me what is real." But while she said as much, she turned the chair to the side and propped her heels up on the table, crossing her legs at the ankle.
And Makoto glanced. She didn't stare at her high heels openly, but her eyes definitely flicked in their direction. Police instinct told Sae that was a red flag that the girl might have a budding fetish, but that didn't necessarily mean she was lying to her; sometimes people weren't ready to admit things to themselves, which meant they were literally incapable of admitting them to someone else.
Or perhaps it was purely due to the teasing - both from her and from Kawakami. Sometimes, that could almost create a fixation against the target's wishes. Or it could have simply been an innocent glance due to the movement and nothing more.
"Y-yeah," she stuttered before clearing her throat. Another red flag. "What's real. I'm not sure you're ready for that, but I'll keep going."
~ x The Priestess x ~
We finished dinner without anything else happening to interrupt. And the conversation went back to school, and eventually to Ren. I found out that he had known for weeks, and she found out that I already had spoken to him about it a little. Plus, she reassured me very firmly that there was nothing romantic going on between them… despite the many, many visits to his little loft.
Then she helped me with the dishes. I tried to tell her to relax, but she said she couldn't since she was supposed to be my maid - despite the clothing change. It was oddly heartwarming, doing something so mundane and domestic next to her.
"So I guess there's no point trying to change your mind," she sighed as we set the last few in the drying rack.
"Maybe. I still don't really understand all this, but every time I ask myself if I like you… I have to say 'yes'. Even if it's inconvenient."
Sadayo laughed quietly as she picked up the towel to dry off her hands. "That's one word for it. Kind of 'inconvenient' for you to date your teacher."
"Yeah. But how can I let that stop me? Look at you… I mean, you're already so pretty in class, but now? In this dress? It's like you're a pop idol."
Finally, my little comments were starting to flatter her instead of making her distressed. Smiling and biting her lip, she took a few steps away. "What, this old thing?" Then she did a little spin for me, and covered her face when I hooped and hollered. "Stop!"
"Hey, you twirled! If you didn't want me to like it, why did you do that?"
"I don't know!" When she lowered her hands, she was still smiling. "By the way… I don't exactly know how to say it, but you look nice, too. I'm just not used to thinking of girls like that but I should have said it earlier."
"Oh, I don't care about that," I lied. I mean, I did care, but I also didn't… so it was half-lying. I guess.
"But it's important. You're a really beautiful young lady, and I don't want my, uh, straightness to keep you from knowing that."
"Like I'm that much gayer than you! Considering I have never looked at any other women!"
Pacing closer again, she took up my hands and squeezed them gently. "How can I be your first? That seems… I don't know. Unrealistic somehow."
"Well, you kind of tried to touch me somewhere nobody had before," I whispered, and she flinched. "Hey - it's alright. I should have been more clear that I didn't want you to; you just thought I was nervous, like a lot of your other clients probably are."
"They are," she admitted with a hesitant nod. "You sure seemed to enjoy taking my tights off, so I thought I might get to… 'upsell' you into a handjob. Isn't that terrible?"
"Not for most of them. I'm sure a lot of them are happy you're showing interest - and underneath my fear that you would find out my identity, maybe I was, too." In a whisper, I added, "I certainly enjoyed the feeling."
Flushing a little darker shade of red, she whispered back, "And I hated it. But only because it felt like… you know when you're walking up the subway steps, paying too much attention to your phone, and you think there's one more step but then there isn't?"
"Ohhhh. Yeah, I know that feeling - it was like that?"
"Definitely. I, um…" Letting out a deep breath, Sadayo announced, "I've never touched another snatch. What a weird thing I have to say out loud!"
That got me smiling and stepping a little closer. "Me, neither. So at least we both have a first that we can still enjoy together."
"That's true." And her eyes danced with something like hope.
"Anyway, what I meant was that you touching me, letting me take your tights off… flirting at me, giggling, all that stuff. At first it didn't do anything, but after a while, I could feel it…" I paused, gathering my thoughts. My teacher waited. "It drew something to the surface that was already hiding beneath it. I always thought you were beautiful, it was just… I had no reason to think it was anything besides… not quite 'hero worship', that's not it. But similar."
"Am I your senpaaaaaiiiiii?" she called out in a very Becky sing-song. When I rolled my eyes, she laughed and pulled me into a light, gentle hug. "Mmm… oh, Makoto, I'm sorry. This whole thing is my fault; I should have tried to find another part-time job. An educator shouldn't spend her off-hours going down on random guys in a French maid outfit."
"No, she shouldn't," I breathed against her skin, breathing in the light, clean scent. She clearly only used the perfume on her shoes and undergarments; it was so severely muted that I was mostly only enjoying pure Sadayo without obfuscation. "But that's not your fault, and you aren't doing anything wrong. It just… turned out this way because I'm so nosy. It's my fault you ended up servicing me, not yours; I made the call."
"Alright, alright. Maybe we should just quit blaming each other. I just can't believe I didn't see through your disguise!"
Grinning, I began to sway slightly to the piano music that was still playing, even an hour later. "Well, we worked pretty hard on it. My friend and I."
"Your… friend?"
"Yeah. She knew about this, but she didn't know which teacher I meant - and I told her I wouldn't tell."
The taller woman pulled back to blink down at me. "You told a friend? That's… why?"
"Because I'm so confused. Still am a little, but I just needed to talk through some things to figure out what to do."
"Well…" Sighing, she nodded before resting her head atop mine - and it felt so good. Why? I loved it and couldn't even quite put my finger on the reason. "I guess that's not really a big deal. You didn't even tell her who I was. Did you blame Ms. Chouno?"
"She did guess Chouno," I giggled, and she laughed as well. "And you, and Ms. Usami. I just didn't confirm anything at all and she told me she didn't care that I wouldn't tell her. Respected my choice."
"That's a good friend."
"But I trust her. And I did eventually have to tell her everything, because... I needed her help guessing your dress size. I'm sorry, but I promise she won't tell anyone."
"Oh, it's fine. Everybody else and their cousin is finding out, so why should I be mad at you for trusting your friend?" We were both quiet for a minute. Then she began, "This friend…"
"Hmm? You want to know who it is?"
"I do, but it's alright if you don't want to tell me. Cuts both ways, right? That wasn't what I was going to ask." After a brief hesitation, Sadayo went on, "Have you ever… with her?"
"Have I ever what? I'm not s- oh! Oh, no, no way!"
"Sorry, sorry." And she definitely sounded apologetic. More than that, she sounded mortified that she asked at all. "Just curious because, well, this whole thing is new to both of us. I thought maybe you and her…"
Leaning up to gently kiss her cheek, I whispered, "Told you that you're my first. Anything."
"God…" This close, I could actually hear her swallowing, and somehow that was the most exciting thing I had ever heard. "You're driving me crazy…"
"Good. And don't worry, my friend is not going to steal me away from you. I promise. We aren't like that."
After a weak whimper, she finally replied, "Maybe she should… I don't know. Why would you want some oba-san when you can have a girl your own age? Is she not prettier than me or something?"
That made me laugh out loud. "No way! You have no idea, she's practically perfect!" But when she drew back to raise an eyebrow at me, I realized my mistake. My stomach seemed to shoot straight down into the floor. "W-wait, that's not- I didn't mean it how it-"
"No, no, it's totally fine. I know I'm over the hill and shouldn't expect to be able to compete with girls in your class."
"I meant that the reason I like you and not her doesn't have anything to do with her being ugly or whatever! Not that you aren't beautiful, because you are! You're the most… come on, don't be mean to me, I'm new at this!"
Laughing at my expense, she reached up to cup my burning cheek tenderly. "That's kind of the whole problem, isn't it?" The mirth left her expression until she just looked like the exhausted teacher I had come to know over the years. "You have no idea what we're about to go through."
Her telling me that did make me take an extra second to contemplate my response. I already knew what I wanted to say, but I tried to take her feelings into account first. Then I shrugged and kissed her on the chin.
"You're right. I don't know. But I trust you to help me figure it out. I trust you completely."
"That's so dangerous," she warned me as we swayed in the space between the dining room and living room. "You already know my life is a mess, and you think I'm going to do any better of a job with yours? What if I screw this up, and I hurt you somehow? What if I ruin everything?"
One of my shoulders rose and fell as I laid my head on hers again. Letting her lead. "We'll fix it. Or we will figure out that we can't, and deal with that when the time comes."
"Wise little girl. Young woman," she corrected with a quiet laugh. I felt her hand slide down to push into the small of my back, and tried not to think about how badly my legs wanted to turn to jelly. "Too sweet and trusting for your own good. But I promise I'll try my best to take care of you. Really, even if I fail, it won't be because I didn't try."
"Yeah," I said as we slow danced. "And this feeling… I would chase it across the stars."
For a few more seconds, I thought Sadayo would not answer at all. Then she breathed, "So would I." Her fragile, frightened voice just barely loud enough for me to hear it.
"Are you really going to be okay? I keep trying to let you go, and you keep trying to let me go… but we're still here. I could kick you out if it will be easier."
"I… no. I think it's too late for that tonight. Maybe we'll both wake up tomorrow and come to our senses, realise we made a huge mistake. But tonight… oh… Makoto, I really don't think I should be saying these things to my own student. But do you wanna hear them, anyway?"
"Sure. No… let me rephrase. I need to hear them, but will also understand if you can't."
Drawing back to look me dead in the eyes, she swallowed hard - and I saw for the first time that she was crying. But she had kept it out of her voice completely. Maybe that's what being an adult was all about: learning how to cry without crying. Her hands moved up to rest on either side of my neck, holding me steady.
"I think you're strong. And beautiful, and… noble. Nosy." At the last one, I laughed shyly, and she smiled a little wider. "But now I know it's because you just… really need to do the right thing. That's very rare to find. And you're also sweet, and steadfast and a million other things. But more than all that? You make me scared because never in my life have I felt more like losing someone would hurt than I do when I look at you."
The raw emotion in that statement bowled me over, and I had already been floating on a cloud at the rest. Now I felt like I might ascend to a higher plane of existence. "Lose me…?"
"Yeah." As my hands moved up to wipe away her tears, she half-flinched away from them but forced herself to stay put. "I just found you in my life - losing you now… isn't that even worse? When we barely got to…"
"I understand," I breathed as I leaned closer. "It's why I keep coming back for more. Just need you, and I'm scared if I don't take what I can get now, that I'll miss my chance. That's a terrible outcome."
Her head shook from side to side as her lips ghosted over mine. "Terrible… but I still don't understand this." We kissed again, still hesitant but less so. "Don't understand… why me…?"
"Because I'm not an idiot," I whispered back, pursing my lips on her bottom one and tugging gently. That shiver along her spine was real and visible.
"Maybe we both are."
"Maybe… I just can't seem to care."
The next kiss lasted a lot longer, and took us to the wall, then over to the counter. Sadayo's lips were so sweet and inviting, her body warm and soft, that I couldn't imagine ever getting enough - and if her reaction was any indication, mine must not have been so bad, either. We seemed to unconsciously take turns pursuing and being pursued. Oddly enough, even though I hummed a lot and felt my entire body tingling in anticipation, she was the one who more often squeaked in surprise, who took breaks to gasp and mention again how crazy this all was. Wasn't I supposed to be the virgin?
Finally, I had her pinned to the couch as we devoured each other's mouths. We had both felt flashes of tongue but never dared explore that deeper. One particularly loud moan broke us apart to catch our breaths, eyes locked in a blistering gaze of warring intentions.
"This… I really-"
"Holy shit," she finished for both of us, and I laughed a little. "That was incredible! Where have you been all my life?! Wait… wait, don't answer that."
Smirking, I shifted my hips atop hers from side to side. "Why? Don't like to think about where I was when you were my age?"
"Makoto, do you actually want me to keep going or to die of embarrassment?" Still, she bit her lip to weather the heat as I ground against her - a totally subconscious act. "Stop, I don't think I'm… ready for all… that…"
"Neither am I. Honestly, I only know how this is supposed to work from what I've read."
"You read about this?!" she gasped out. "Lesbian sex?"
"No! What?! I mean, mostly in class for sex ed. But then… after all this with you, I started to wonder… how… to do it? And I still can't quite picture it in my head."
My teacher's expression grew even more bashful as she looked away. "You were that serious about me? Before tonight, I mean. That is… I don't really get it, but I can't deny it feels wonderful. Being yours like this."
"You're mine for as long as you want to be," I purred. But it didn't take her long after that to push me back slightly. "What?"
"Listen. I, um… I need a little more time to think about this. Before we go any further, I mean." The shame was etched into every inch of her face, so I had no trouble believing her.
"Okay." My hips came to a stop despite how much I wanted to continue. "Seriously, don't be afraid to tell me to slow down at any time. I know it seems like I'm… only interested in pushing this as far as I can, but I swear that's not what's happening. I'm just really awkward."
Sadayo thought about that for a moment before she snorted. "Yeah right. You're working me so easy! But… I know, it's all new for you. Awkwardness plus inexperience equals… well, a lot of what's happened tonight." With a helpless laugh, she added, "This is insane, I can't believe it feels so natural with a woman! I thought it would disgust me!"
"Me, too! But… at least you've been on actual dates with men before. Maybe that makes it worse for you?"
"Oh, definitely. I keep finding unexpected things and not finding things I expect!" One of her fingers poked the side of my breast and I shivered. "Like these."
"Well, they do tend to be found there on women," I laughed softly, earning a much more full belly-laugh from my teacher.
"And you're so soft and delicate, gentle… which is part of what's throwing me. I'm used to exclusively dating men taller than me who can truly make me feel like a lady. I was kind of shallow about it, if I'm being really honest with you. But a year or so of working this job for Victoria has kind of broken me of that shallowness. Maybe…"
When she had been thoughtfully silent for a few seconds, I kissed her cheek and prompted, "Maybe?"
"Maybe that's part of why I'm not running screaming from this right now. Being required to flirt with and jerk off a bunch of gross guys reset my expectations. A cute girl like you is… a relief? Definitely a step up from any of them, even if I never thought about it before."
"And even if I'm a little younger than would be ideal," I admitted. She did nod her agreement, but also looked apologetic about it. "I get it. And I know there's really nothing I can do about it, but I would if I could."
"Whoa, whoa, wait." She rested a hand on my shoulder. "You don't think I blame you for being in school, do you? I would never-"
"No, no," I assured her quickly.
"Good," she sighed in relief. "This is nobody's 'fault', it's just a really cruel twist of fate. You're an amazing young woman, Makoto, and I wouldn't change a thing."
I must have been smiling even wider than I thought, because Sadayo kissed both of my cheeks tenderly. "Th-thank you."
"What? It's just the truth." Then she rolled her eyes and said, "Besides, if I could magically change one of us, why make you older when I could make me younger? Talk about a waste of a wish; I'd rather add ten years to my life then subtract from yours."
"Nine years," I corrected gently, petting up and down her side. But it made her laugh. "What? Isn't that less bad than ten?"
"Yeah, but I really doubt it's going to make much of a difference to our families." Then her eyes went wide. "Oh God… my parents."
Wincing, I pictured the middle-aged couple that had been yelling at Miss Kawakami in the hospital. I knew they definitely were not her parents, but my brain filled in the mental image with them anyway. "Are they going to think less of you?"
"Definitely. They are good parents, don't get me wrong, but they're pretty traditional. Take your pick! Will they be more mad that I'm gay or that I'm dating a teenager? Honestly, I'm not sure."
"Bisexual," I corrected again. Though I did start to worry that correcting her so much would be annoying. "You still find men attractive, right?"
"They won't care about that. Especially because they think girls liking other girls is 'just a phase' anyway." Her hand caressed over my hair, and I leaned into the touch. "I have to go soon."
My heart squeezed in my chest. "Oh. Yeah, I guess our time's almost up. I should grab your money."
"Thanks. It's… I can use it, sure, but really it's the best protection I have against catching hell for sneaking around with you. If it's part of my job, who can really blame me?"
"Exactly. And it's not forever."
As I extricated myself from her tempting body, she looked vaguely sad. "No��� not forever. You're right. Just feels like it."
~ o ~
Within about five minutes, she was back in her maid outfit and I had her ¥10000 stuffed into her pocket. We lingered by the door. Neither of us seemed to know what to say, but kept trying to communicate something with our eyes to the other person. I know what I was trying to communicate was that I hated to see her go, that all I wanted was for her to stay so we could explore the strange new feelings together. I can only guess what she was trying to tell me.
"Thanks for a wonderful evening," she told me with a smile and a bow. "You really pulled out all the stops. Kind of blew me away."
I bowed back. "My pleasure. I'll… have to save up a little before I can request you again. Sorry."
"Oh… I'm sorry, we can find some time when I'm not working. I don't want to bleed you dry! Maybe…ugh, it'll be riskier but you could come to my place. I live alone."
"Riskier?"
"They'll see you going in and out of my apartment. God… okay, what flimsy excuse will we use? I'm tutoring you? I mean, you're probably the smartest girl in school. But… maybe with me being a female teacher, it could work…"
Eyes dancing with with ill-suppressed glee, I leaned up to deliver another heated kiss to the woman I was suddenly dating. Or something like dating. Then I pulled back, biting my lip as I watched her sway and waiver.
"We'll just have to be very careful. Like a game."
"What a dangerous game. Didn't think a little kid like you could be such a gambler." But at least she was smiling as she bowed low at the waist. "Thank you for your support, Master! Becky really enjoys getting dirty for you!"
I don't exactly know where the flirty line came from. But before I could stop myself, I was muttering, "Seems like you do." It was the reason a deeply blushing Sadayo scrambled for the doorknob and out of my apartment as fast as she possibly could.
To Be Continued…
#Queen Of Temperance#forkanna writes#persona 5 fanfiction#p5 fanfic#makoto x kawakami#jess the writer
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The small lump in the corner that was Dorothy only seemed briefly startled when Glinda came to get her the following morning. However, she was far more surprised when instead, she went to the Tin Man's cell.
"So we're going to do a thing," the blonde witch began uneasily. "You… have to have figured out by now that we can't just let you run around willy nilly. You attacked Nessa more than once, and the threats you made were pretty graphictitious! So while I-"
"HMMHHPHH!" he growled through the makeshift gag.
"Enough of that, now," she warned in a sing-song, as if scolding a small child. "Anyway, you're going to be moved upstairs into one of the other rooms, and I'm going to try to tinker with you for a while. Maybe it'll do some good, maybe not. But all the same, I think we should give it the old Shiz try, don't you?"
Clearing her throat, Dorothy approached the bars and whispered meekly, "You aren't going to hurt him, are you? I kn- I know he hasn't been kind to you, but he's been most kind to me!"
"Don't you worry your pretty little head," she replied in a soft, consoling tone. "I can't promise what I do won't hurt, but I'm not going to do anything purely to hurt him. My hope is that I can help him some way or other. And if I can't… well, I guess we could just pop him right back into this cell afterward. No harm done."
Then Glinda unlocked the cell and went inside, securing manacles around his wrists and arms and legs — ones not bolted to the wall. Once he was secure enough that he could not escape or attack, she released him from the wall and stood back, raising her wand.
"Alright, let's try this one again… bubblitio!" Nothing. She took a deep, calming breath and attempted, "Bulbulious bubblissimo! Bumbulous bumbletonia! Spheroidimax voluminia!"
"Uhmmm," the Scarecrow that was Fiyero said as Glinda waved her wand frantically. "None of those sound like very magical words."
Her lips pouted at him and her brow furrowed. "And just whom amongst us is a witch? You? I don't believe so!"
"You're not much of one, either," the Lion grumbled lazily from atop his paws.
"Hey! That isn't very kind!"
"I'm not much of a Lion myself; no offense was intended."
Shrugging that off, she narrowed her eyes and tried the first word again, focusing hard. "BUBBLITIO!"
This time, an almost invisible pink film began to wrap itself around Boq. His metallic eyes went as wide as could be to see the magic actually taking shape this time, and he looked at Glinda with a mixture of anger and betrayal. But she did not acknowledge his gaze, and merely sighed.
"You brought this on yourself." When he didn't react, she shook her head sadly and began to back out of the cell, wand raised to direct the bubble she had formed. "A pity, a real pity, Biq."
He only began to struggle and grunt once the bubble began to move him, muffled though his cries were. Casting a semi-apologetic look over her shoulder at the others, she continued to bounce him up the stairs.
"You and I need to have some serious discussion, little boy of tin. And why don't we try out some things from the Grimmerie, too? That sounds like so much fun!"
~ o ~
Elphaba only waited a few minutes after Glinda left to slip down into the dungeons. Both the Lion and Dorothy recoiled to see her, tall and imposing, green and black, framed by the stone doorway. Fiyero, of course, merely watched all parties with curiosity.
"H-Hello," Dorothy attempted in a nervous tone. "Is… is it alright if I ask-"
"Not yet," Elphaba said, dragging a simple wooden chair from the table by far wall over to the Lion's cell — a few inches out of reach of his claws should he suddenly decide to take an idle swipe at her. But she did not sit just yet. Instead, she opened Fiyero's cage, and simply stood back to let him exit.
"Much obliged," was all he said, cheerful as ever.
"What?!" Dorothy gasped in a hushed voice, watching him fetch two other chairs from the table. "Wh- but I… I thought you were going to let me out if I behaved, I didn't… you aren't even shackling him! I don't understand!"
"No, you don't," the witch said evenly, tossing the same old cuffs through for her to put onto herself. Her eyes were sad and wary, but she did as she was silently bade. As her captor unlocked the door, she went on, "But you will. If you listen, and try not to ask too many questions, I think you'll find you understand a great deal…"
~ o ~
Hours passed, and Glinda found herself flummoxed. She had paged through every single page of the Grimmerie, skimming the contents with her eyes, and she was no closer to finding anything that would make any difference as far as Boq was concerned. This was made all the more frustrating by the fact that she was not nearly so adept at Lurlinic as her chartreuse counterpart, and the meaning of certain phrases or passages eluded her. Still, she had been hoping that persistence would pay off where education failed.
"Fine," she finally sighed, drooping against the arm of the chair she had sank down into already, the book hanging limply from her hand. "I know a spell cannot be undone once it's cast, but there has to be a way to… to de-tinnify you! Something in here, not to undo the spell exactly, but that would still turn you into a normal Munchkin again!"
Of course, Tin Man had nothing to say. At no point had Glinda felt comfortable removing his restraints, so she hadn't. His large, sad eyes continued to follow her everywhere while she stood to replace the book on a table, as if pleading with her to see more than was visible.
"Enough, Biq. I don't care how long you give me the puppy dog eyes."
Still he stared. Bitter tears began to slide down his cheeks as he sat in the chair opposite her, unable to do anything else.
"You'll only rust if you keep that up." Throwing up her hands, she snapped, "What did you think would happen?! The moment Nessa lets you go, you start to run away? To what, find me?" She let out a blast of laughter. "Hate to break it to you, Munchkin Boy, but I've never even had the tiniest shred of interest in you! Just because you liked me doesn't mean I had to like you back!"
His face turned away. She wanted to feel less hatred, less annoyance at his attitude and more compassion toward his obvious grief, but it wasn't going to happen. Even though Nessa had done things to him that weren't fair, there were reasons for that. And she intended to set the record straight.
"I should have been this honest with you from the beginning," she confessed. "You… you really don't deserve it now, but you did then, and… and so did Nessa. That part is your fault; I know there had to have been a thousand times you could have told her you weren't interested, and all you did was go along for the ride. And then you complained too late, and… well…"
A muffled sob filled the room. To try and put some distance between herself and the source of her annoyance and grief, she crossed to the window, grasping the ledge and staring out over the jagged rocks of the Kells both near and distant, down at the village of Kiamo Ko.
"I know Nessa shouldn't have trapped you in Munchkinland or cast any spells on you that she didn't understand; nobody's saying any different. But does that really make it right for you to try to kill her? None of us is free from guilt for this, Tinny. I wasn't honest with you, and you weren't honest with Nessa. So easy to start out that way, huh? Best of intentions. And we really loused things up." Turning again, she fixed him with a curious gaze, wringing her wand in her nervous hands. "Isn't it funny how Nessa was the only one who was honest from the beginning? She may have failed in other areas, but by golly, she was always truthful about her feelings for you. Just… funny."
Then she strode closer and spat at him, "But all you know how to do is lie. You lied to Nessarose about your feelings for her, and you lied to Dorothy about Elphaba and I." When recognition sparked behind his eyes, she growled, "Yes, that's right! I know all about that! How could you tell her she and I are… that we would do things like that? To a girl barely old enough to start holding hands?! Shame on you! Makes me wonder if you ever did have a heart in the first place!"
Things were going nowhere fast. Grunting in sheer annoyance, she made a couple of quick swishes with her wand and wrapped his chair with more ropes.
"Obviously, I can't do much for you right now. But I'll… I'll try again tomorrow, I guess. Sorry." The last word might have sounded insincere, but Glinda meant it deep down. She didn't even wait for a response before grabbing up the Grimmerie and heading for the door; even if he did respond, it wouldn't be anything worth hearing.
Within minutes, she was descending back to the dungeons again, having stashed the book somewhere safe. Though she had high hopes everything would have gone well with their other prisoners, she could not risk the Lion pouncing on her and stealing their most powerful artefact.
The scene laid out before her was an interesting one, to be sure. Fiyero was sitting lazily in a chair near Elphaba's, and the Lion was lying in the cage with his great, shaggy head on his paws. The manacled Dorothy, however, was cross-legged in her seat, leaned forward with rapt attention. This was obviously the greatest number of direct answers she had ever received from anyone since being tossed into Oz, and she was drinking them in like a parched wanderer of the Shifting Sands.
"Well, I think you're very brave to try and rescue them," she was assuring Elphaba. "What I don't understand is, why does the Wizard want them to be silent in the first place? Surely he can be the President without doing that, he already is one and they haven't bothered him so far!"
"President?" Fiyero asked, the word sounding as unfamiliar coming from him as it did in Glinda's ears. But Elphaba answered her question instead of focusing on Fiyero's remark.
"He needed a scapegoat — no offense to Dr. Dillamond. As I said, we've had a few droughts, and the Wizard hasn't handled the economic recession very well. It was either start squandering his treasury to balance things out, or find something to distract the citizens of Oz, to keep them from blaming him and rioting. It's a calculated diversionary tactic."
Dorothy bobbed her shoes-that-wouldn't-come-off up and down and frowned down toward the stone floor. "My Uncle Henry says we're just coming out of another one of those 'recessions', too. I don't know much about it, except that we haven't had much to eat, or money for new clothes. That's why..." She bit her bottom lip.
"Go on," Glinda said gently a moment later, startling her and the Lion very slightly. "That's why…?"
"Oh… hullo, Miss Glinda. W-well, I know it's silly, what with everything you're troubled with. But I should like to have my gingham dress back, if we c-can manage it. Aunt Em had to henpeck Uncle Henry for weeks to buy that, because she said a girl ought to have a proper dress for Easter Sunday! A-and the thought of going home without it..."
Once she had shaken off wondering what "gingham" and "Easter Sunday" might mean, Glinda was a little shocked to see that Dorothy looked ashamed. It spoke volumes about her family; she was less afraid of her their reaction and more worried about disappointing them, inconveniencing those she loved.
"There, there," she shushed her as she walked over to pet along her shoulders. The girl sighed despondently, but did at least seem calmed. "If the rest of our plans work out, I promise we'll search the palace. And if we can't turn it up, we'll make you two new dresses! The best Oz has to offer!"
Though she rolled her eyes, Elphaba refrained from commenting on whether or not she considered this important enough to discuss. Instead, she told the young lady, "For now, I'd like an answer."
"Answer? Oh…" She gulped, glancing over at Fiyero and back. "I'm just a girl, I can't fight, or use magic, or do anything useful. What difference does it make if I join you?"
"I'm not saying you have to face the Wizard head-on," Elphaba assured her. "Just don't get in our way. Your moral support is better than opposition."
Glaring at Elphaba for the callous way she had phrased things, Glinda added, "And you'll be plenty useful! Besides, we don't only want you around because of that — we like you! Don't we, Elphie?" No response. Glinda kicked her. "Don't we?"
"I don't dislike her," she offered more truthfully. "Other than that nasty business of trying to kill me."
"You know we're pals, Dorothy," Fiyero put in, leaning forward with his hands on his knees. "I owe you for rescuing me from that cornfield, at the very least! But I can't ignore how badly the Wizard's treated my old classmates. Ooh, it chafes my straw! So I'm sorry to say it, but if you keep supporting him…"
At that, Dorothy quickly shook her head and said, "No, no, I'd never dream of saying it's alright! What all he's done, and then lied about it all to me! I don't understand how he came to be in charge of Oz in the first place, an old humbug like him!"
The two witches shared a weary look. Never had they expected to be history teachers when they enrolled at Shiz, but that seemed to be their fate for the afternoon.
"Let's go upstairs to get something to eat," Elphaba recommended gruffly, pushing to stand. "Nessa should have one of her infernal stews ready to force down."
"Can you bring me back some infernal stew?" Lion asked as they stood. "I'm so hungry; milk only goes so far for a full-grown Lion, and I don't much care for vegetables. Even an old bone would be something."
"Of course," Glinda told him. "We'll bring it with us when we return Dorothy."
As they ascended the steps, Elphaba began, "The Wizard came to us… oh, a couple of decades ago. We were all too young to remember what the time before he ruled was like, I'm afraid — but we know from our studies that our previous queen, Ozma the Billious, had left behind a newborn when she was poisoned; we don't know the gender, there was no formal announcement — already unusual in and of itself. But it's assumed it was a succeeding princess, because that child vanished when the Wizard flew into our world in a foreign contraption the likes of which we had never seen before."
"Poisoned?!" Dorothy gasped.
"Yes," Glinda supplied. "A pretty unregal way to die, isn't it? Her husband was supposed to look after the heir, but… well, he died, too. Boating accident. Worse yet, nobody knows how it was done, or who's responsible for either deaths or the baby disappearing. Still a mystery."
"But… but that's how my parents died," Dorothy was breathing. "On a boat. Imagine that."
Elphaba was shaking her head. "I wouldn't be surprised to learn it was all the Wizard and Morrible's doing. True, he had not arrived yet when the Ozma line ended, but who's to say he hadn't arranged for it beforehand? Or his 'secretary' could have been laying the groundwork."
"Conspiracy theories are fun, aren't they?" Fiyero observed with a light chuckle. "But it might be smarter to stick to what we know, and what we have to do."
"Right. Go on, then."
Somehow, his painted-on eyebrows arched high. "Me? You know what kind of student I was!" But he shrugged and went on, anyway. "Simple, really. Everyone thought the old Wizard was magical because he flew into our world from another, and that made it pretty easy for him to claim the empty throne. Right place, right time."
Head shaking much like Elphaba's, which amused Glinda to notice, Dorothy said, "If he really did kill either of them… oh, even the baby… that's one of the most awful things I've ever heard! And he's never been thrown in jail?"
"How can we? He's the jailor." Elphaba huffed in annoyance as they came to the kitchen and pushed inside. "And there's nothing we can do to prove what he's done, either way. At least Glinda and I are witnesses to the way he tricked us into transforming the Monkeys. If there are any witnesses to his alleged murders, I haven't found them, and I doubt they'll come forward now."
"Such light conversation," Nessa observed as she toiled over the stove. "I was just standing here, lamenting that you two have taken the more interesting jobs and left me to be scullery maid, but perhaps I haven't missed anything, after all."
"You haven't," Glinda sighed, breathing in deeply. "Mmm, that smells good… I'm starvatiously hungry!"
Dorothy glanced down at the plates and silverware laid out for the four of them who actually owned stomachs, then back up to Elphaba. "Can you at least move my handcuffs in front of me so I don't need help to eat?"
As no one much wanted to spoonfeed her again, they relented, and Dorothy did her best not to drip on her dress as they discussed all that had transpired. Nessa looked morose when Glinda reported her failing at improving Boq's outlook on life or his physical condition, but did not say a word; she seemed entirely defeated in that area. Privately, Glinda thought that was for the best - the faster she moved on, the better. Even if she was somewhat spoiled, she deserved better than a man who wanted to chop her head off.
"I'm not sure what I can do for you," Dorothy finally told them as Glinda and Elphaba were washing the dishes and Nessa was disposing of the scraps. "But if you'll just… help me with two things, I'll do whatever I can, anything at all!"
"The shoes and the dress?" Elphaba guessed.
"Oh… three things." When the green lips pursed, she rushed ahead, "I forgot about the dress already! The other thing was to help me get home, if you can. Of c-course, I'm only asking you to try your best, you know. If you can't, well… then I guess I'll live here forever with these heavy shoes weighing me down."
"That, we will promise," Glinda said for all of them. Elphaba shot her a look, but she ignored it. "We'll do what we can, and if we can't, then we'll figure out somewhere for you to stay in Oz. Deal?"
"Deal." She held out her manacles to be unlocked, and they blinked at her. Slowly, an inch at a time, she lowered them as she whispered, "Oh… am… I still… going back to the dungeons?"
Glancing at the other two briefly to gauge their responses, Glinda then walked over and freed her. Dorothy turned a smiling face up toward her that was so earnest she couldn't help but grin back. "Good. I'll just take you to get washed up again — even if you'll have to hang your feet out of the tub."
As they walked down the hallway, Dorothy slipped her hand into Glinda's, which surprised her very slightly. But she squeezed it in comfort; she could only assume the girl was still scared of the big, drafty castle, and the less alone she felt, the better.
"Miss Glinda… thank you so much. I know we've only just met, but I… feel like you're how I'd like my mother to have been, if I could remember her."
"M-mother?!" Glinda burst out in mild surprise.
"OH! Oh, is that not alright?" she breathed. "Of c-course, I didn't mean to say you're old enough to be my mother! Not a w-woman so young and lovely as you, not at all! But only… you're so kind, and thoughtful, and I'm sure it's because of you that I'm not a prisoner anymore. I can't believe I was ever afraid of you, or thought you were a deviant!"
Entirely mollified, the Witch of the North had to chuckle — mostly in chagrin at her own overreaction. "Fine, fine, I'm glad to have helped how I could. You are a sweet little thing, all in all, aren't you?" As they came again to the bath, she said, "Of course, I can't promise you anything… certainly not that we'll live to see the end of this fight with the Wizard, or that we'll find a way to send you back to Amerikansas, but…"
"You'll do your best," Dorothy finished for her, squeezing her hand again before she began to help heating the water. "That's all a girl can ask."
~ o ~
"...and that was the last spell I tried," Glinda was telling Elphaba as they fell to the task that they had both been putting off for far too long: unpacking. It had taken some careful plotting to retrieve their few effects from the cave behind Wicca Falls, and since then too much had been transpiring to worry about opening the pair of disparate trunks and making a good run at their contents. Presently, half of what they owned was strewn across the bed, the rest either hung up properly in one of the wardrobes or stacked on the vanity. Privately, Glinda lamented not being able to use said vanity for its intended purposes, but there was no place for that type of "vanity" in their current lives.
"I can't say I'm surprised, Glinda. You know that spells can't be undone, and it's slippery work even changing them somewhat the way we already have with Boq. Tampering further… if we do succeed, he'll either wind up dead, or completely unrecognisable."
A sigh welled up powerfully from the pit of her stomach, but ended up sounding pathetic and soft when it came forth. "You're probably right, but I'd still appreciate it if you could take a look for yourself. I mean, you're clearly the better witch between us, right?"
"Only through study," she hedged. Then she stood a little straighter, shooting over her shoulder, "At what point did we start embracing the word 'witch' instead of hating it? When did that happen?"
"Search me, Elphie; I just work here."
Tutting briefly, Elphaba laid out a few of her older school effects from within her travelling cloak. A sniffle threatened to break free from Glinda when she recognised the Shiz guidebook, small bound leather tome that it was, lying next to the green bottle and a few spare coins that weren't even accepted outside the Emerald City as valid currency. Much though she protested, her Elphie truly was a sentimental creature.
Something stirred in the back of her mind. It took her a long second or two for it to bob its meandering way along to the front, and until that point, she hadn't even been sure what the stirring was in relation to.
"Nessarose isn't much of a witch at all," her roommate was saying as she put away a few of her dresses, more neatly into one of their closets than previously. Plenty of room to work with in there, now that they had cleared away some of the decrepit old junk. "However, I think she might have an aptitude for magic if she works on it as hard as she's worked at making her awful stew into tolerable stew. Just needs a swift kick in the-"
"That bottle."
"Hm?" Glancing down, she picked the bottle back up, then stared over its mouth at Glinda. "What about this bottle?"
"Didn't you tell me once before that it was… important to you, for some reason?" Even now, Glinda was still barely aware of why this mattered, but the threads were beginning to weave themselves together now.
"I did. It was my mother's. Father would often tell me that it was a prized possession, and she never wanted to be apart from it. When he would ask, she would simply state that it reminded her of her firstborn, but…" One shoulder rose and fell. "I got the feeling that wasn't the full story. Or at least, old Frex didn't believe it was."
"Hm."
"Why do you ask?"
"Oh, nothing." Keeping her tone carefully distant, aloof, she went on, "Just that… it looks conveniently similarly to the bottle the Wizard was drinking from when we dropped in on him."
Elphaba started, glancing between her and the bottle. "Really? Well, it's just a green bottle… no label to say what's in it. Could have been just a similar shape."
"No, not similar. The same. I'm telling you, whatever's in his, or used to be in yours, it's the exact same type of bottle, shape and colour."
This silence was a bit longer and quieter than the previous one. Glinda wouldn't have guessed that silences could be quieter or louder; they were either silent or they weren't. Until now.
"No. Well, I mean… maybe she visited the Emerald City. Could have been anything."
"Could have."
"Then why are you bringing this up? We have a lot to do."
"Elphie…"
Exasperated, she threw up both hands. "What am I supposed to do? How do you want me to react to this news? So my mother and the Wizard both have identical vessels for holding liquor. Big twigging deal. Dorothy and Nessa both have shiny shoes; maybe they're related."
"They are. The shoes, not Dorothy and Nessa," she snapped when Elphaba raised her eyebrows at her. "Both are because of our spells! So they are connected! And it might be the same with the Wiz-"
"I don't believe you really believe this, this… what was it Fiyero said? 'Conspiracy theories'. That's what you're spinning. Wilder and more fanciful by the minute, if you think I'm going to follow your logic to where it's leading."
Glinda's hands went to her waist, impatient at the attitude she was receiving. "I'm not outright saying anything! Just bringing up possibilities! What you do with them is up to you!" When she got no answer right away, she approached Elphaba, grasping her forearms to stop her from continuing to dig in her closet. "Elphaba, please? Just… doesn't it sound like something we ought to try figuring out?"
"Maybe. Another time."
"But we don't have-"
"I need to finish this. Either with your help, or without. But for now, I can't…" A slight flicker of pain showed in her eyes before she mastered it, suppressed it and returned her features to their quickly-becoming-normal steely resolve. "We need to worry about how we're going to depose the Wizard and bring peace to the Animals. That's first. Secondarily, we have to keep an eye on Dorothy, and look through the Grimmerie for the sake of a stupid, ungrateful wretch of a tin can."
Feeling stupid for having brought the whole thing up, Glinda strode for the door. "Fine, Elphie. I can tell when I'm not wanted around. I'll see you at supper."
As she slipped out of the room, she just scarcely caught Elphaba's sigh. She probably felt bad for being unpleasant just then, but couldn't quite find the humility to chase after her. Maybe that was for the best; this way, they could both have a few minutes with their own thoughts to ponder the situation and to let their tempers settle.
But she certainly wasn't going to let the matter drop. Not if it meant what she thought it might.
To Be Continued…
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NOTE: HAPPY HALLOWEEN! I'm off to do some spooktacular writing at a NaNoWriMo event, but thought I would do some updating first. Hope you all have a spine-chilling evening!
CHAPTER EIGHT
~ x JUDGMENT x ~
Sae Niijima was silent for a few long, painfully quiet seconds as Makoto's voice faded out in the small interrogation room. Staring across at her sister uncomfortably, hand at her chin as she mulled over the entirety of this situation.
"What?" Makoto finally asked.
"The way you described that…" Her eyes lowered. They were flinty and her tone harsh, but the words themselves vulnerable if listened to closely enough. "I think I've robbed you of a normal home environment. That might be why you're going down this path."
"And what 'path' is that?" She folded her hands on the table, sitting up straight. "The wrong one?"
"Yes. And no. Just… a more difficult one than I would have chosen for my baby sister."
The student council president's eyes darkened. "I'm not a baby."
"That wasn't what I meant and you know it."
"Maybe not. But it's how you've always treated me. I used to buy into that, you know; used to accept that I was a burden on you. But it's not true, is it? Because I do as much for our household as you do at my present status. Going to school is my job, and I'm great at it."
Teeth clenching, she fired back at her, "But it isn't a job that contributes to our household right now. Even if I may have been harsh with you, I need you to understand how difficult my life is, and why I let it drain me as much as I do. You think I want to be a public prosecutor because it's 'fun'? This is hard work, Makoto."
"Of course," she sighed wearily. "And I know that already. You don't have to shove it in my face every few days so I don't forget."
"That's… not what…" Sae turned away, staring into the corner. "Fine. So you're a lesbian now, hm? That easy? One little crush moment and you make up your mind to-"
"I don't want to hear that from you," she fired at her hotly. "No, this is not something I 'decided'. You taught me it doesn't work that way, and I'm not trying to make it work that way for me. Just figuring myself out."
Waving her hands, she said, "Alright, alright. Enough about that for now. You're honestly telling me that you and Sadayo Kawakami never had sexual relations in that love hotel room? How am I supposed to actually believe that?"
Makoto sighed, all the ire leaving her expression as she slumped down in her chair. "Because I'm your sister. But maybe you can't trust me anymore, Sis. I don't know."
"Well, you must see how it looks. And I would prefer to trust you than not to trust you, but you have made that quite a bit more difficult than it was before I found out more than I bargained for."
"Right. About that… I guess you're still waiting for me to get you caught up, aren't you? I might as well…"
~ x The Priestess x ~
Miss Kawakami left Hotel Juliet not long after that. I insisted several times that she should take the extra ¥1000 for all the trouble, even if not for the foot rub, but she refused very firmly. Despite how much she needed the money, it seemed she still wanted to earn every last yen. Which is just the kind of person she was.
No, I did not purchase her stockings. Why would anyone do that?
So now we had a problem. I knew a secret about her, and she knew one about me. Granted, neither of us was the type of person who would use it for blackmail purposes, but it still made us responsible for keeping each other's secret under wraps. it was going to make interacting with each other very interesting from then on.
But before that, I had something else to follow up with. Or should I say, someone else.
"How'd it go?!" Ann demanded the moment the phone line connected. "C'mon, gimme those deets!"
"Not here," I whispered. "Meet me at the Ore No Beko - the beef bowl place, on Central Street?"
"Mkay, I'll see you there!"
The walk wasn't terribly far. I felt stupid leaving the love hotel in my "guy" costume, so I ducked into an alley and stowed the rest in the shoulder bag I brought along exactly for that reason. The chest bindings were still annoying but I would just have to put up with them until I went to the bathroom again.
Not long after that, Ann showed up. Even despite the late hour, there she was. I began to feel really lucky that we had become that close in such a short period of time.
"Hey, girl," she called excitedly as she pushed through the crowd over to my corner. Now she was wearing a red varsity jacket over a blue button-up with a white skirt. Three guesses whether she looked cute wearing it. Go on, guess.
"Hi."
As she bounced into the seat next to me, I moved my tea out of the way. "Hoowee! I ran all the way to the train, and then all the way here from the station!"
"That sounds like you," I chuckled in a quiet voice.
"Huh? Oh, yeah, I guess so. There's hot gossip, right?" Something must have shown in my face, because she leaned a little closer. "Hey… Mako-chan, what's the matter?"
"We should order. And then I'll tell you everything."
We ordered. And then I told her everything - well, everything except the teacher's identity and details that would expose that on accident. Luckily, Beko only seemed to get busier at night instead of emptier, so nobody could really pay attention to our conversation over all the noise. Or wanted to, I'm sure.
Amazingly enough, Ann took it pretty well. She just sat there and nodded, listening and glancing away. Well… at least I thought she was taking it well. What if she just couldn't hear me?
"Cool… um, you think you might be gay?"
So much for her not listening. "No idea," I sighed - then we paused while the bowls were sat in front of us. They smelled amazing, and we both inhaled the savoury aroma of the seasoned meat deeply before we broke our wooden chopsticks apart and dug in. Ann had opted to forego the egg - which I know is because she's trying to watch her figure for modelling - but I felt like I needed it after the night I had. Comfort food.
"Hmmhggh," she sighed a couple of minutes later, once our bellies were half-full of rice and beef and onion. "Geeze Louise, that really hit the spot!"
My lips twitched into a smile. "What is 'geeze Louise'? I don't know that one."
"Just something from the States." Stirring her bowl and staring into its depths, she began, "So…"
"So?"
"Well… you're into this teacher now."
"Hey, I am not," I tried to head her off. "Well… not for sure. But she is pretty, and um… and I liked talking to her woman-to-woman, once we got past all the… other stuff."
Smirking as she leaned closer, she muttered, "She bathed you, huh? That's a lot of 'other stuff'. Plus that sexy footrub!"
"Since when are footrubs 'sexy'?!"
"C'mon," she chuckled as she took a sip of her aloe drink - another healthy choice. Made me feel really self-conscious about my melon soda, but at least I had some tea before she got there. "Footrubs are like, the truest expression of love, right? Anybody can kiss a cute girl or boy on the lips, but saying 'I like you so much I'm gonna touch your stinky feet to make you feel better' is just… the real shit! Totes selfless! Right?!"
Laughing weakly, I focused on my beef for a second or two, purely to avoid thinking too hard about whether or not she was right. Because if she was… a lot of the comments Kawakami made during and after the massage were even more telling than I thought. Which was bad.
Mistaking my silence for sadness, she sighed and put down her chopsticks. "Hey, I'm sorry. You're freaking out, right? I'd be freaking out."
"Well… it's a quiet freak-out."
"Uh-huh. Um… you said you don't know if this is just a weird thing or if it's really who you are. And like, I know in Japan it's 'weird' to like other girls, but it's not like that in the West! Like, what's her name? The one who was the spacy Disney fish… man, I can't remember right now. But she's a big gay icon, and she's had a wife for years! So it's like, real there, not a little kid thing."
I absorbed that as best I could through the filter of Ann's bubbly personality and meandering thought processes. "Yeah. Problem is, I am in Japan. Not over there. And here, people are going to think I'm either immature, or a pervert."
"I don't think you're a pervert." When I glanced over at her, those baby blues were burning holes right through me as she smiled. "You did this whole thing just to make sure she wasn't hurting that student, and to make sure she wasn't being hurt, either. Just because you ended up crushing on her… it's not a bad thing."
"No?" Screwing up my courage, or what I could find of it, I asked her, "You're not… uncomfortable?"
"Huh? No way! I mean, it's not like I had to watch you two or whatever."
"I meant sitting next to me. Knowing I might like girls."
"Oh." Her eyes glanced up and down. "Well… you might be a lesbian, but you're not a creep. Not all guys are Kamoshida, right? This is the same thing." Then she laughed and waved a hand back and forth as she added, "N-not that I'm saying all other lesbians are creeps! Probably none of 'em are! Like, I meant the opposite!"
"Okay, calm down," I chuckled, bumping her with my elbow. It worked; she relaxed a little, cheeks a tiny bit rosy. "But, um… thanks, Ann. Really. I can't even believe this is happening to me, and… I'm really relieved you're not upset that I'm… different."
Suddenly my face was being yanked around to look at her, so she was sandwiching my cheeks between both of her hands. "Mako-chan. Did you forget what our after school job is? Like, you wanting to make out with one of your teachers ain't that crazy."
"Ann…" It must have been the relief in my voice, because she gulped. "Hm?"
"Ooh… okay, it does make that sound a little different, though," she said nervously as she let go of my face. "Never had a gay girl say my name like that."
"I didn't say I was gay for certain!" I hissed at her. "Would you let me figure this out on my own?!"
Her head was already tilting thoughtfully. "Do you think that's what it's going to be what it's like when a boy finally asks me out, and he says my name as we stare into each other's eyes under the moonlight?"
"I'm not a boy!"
"You were for a few hours. And you still have no boobs right now!"
"ANN!"
~ o ~
By the time we had polished off our food and exited the restaurant, the topic of my burgeoning sexuality had gotten a little old. So we went back to discussing Miss Kawakami. The warm night combined with the warm food in our stomachs made us yearn for the cool underground of the subway station as we chattered back and forth.
"I wish I knew who it was," Ann sighed. "Especially… like, I keep wanting to guess. I stopped myself from doing it at least six times."
"Who would you guess?" I asked curiously as we jogged down the stairs. "I'm granting you permission now."
"Huh? Oh, um… well, I really can only think of Miss Chouno and Miss Kawakami. I don't think many of the other teachers could pull off a maid costume at all."
"O-oh?" I gasped, uncomfortable at how close she was.
"Well… Ms. Usami might be pretty cute behind those glasses. And with that wig you mentioned. Kinda hard to tell."
Relaxing just the tiniest bit, I said, "Okay. I was just curious who you would guess; I still promised not to tell anybody. Even though if I was going to tell, it would be you."
That might have been the biggest smile I ever saw on Ann Takamaki's face. And she regularly smiled bright enough to put the sun to shame.
"Thing is," she finally said as we waited for the train, "I still have no idea what to tell you. How are you supposed to actually go out with her if she's your teacher? I mean, in half a year you could ask her out for real; she wouldn't be your teacher anymore once you're off to university. Right?"
My eyebrows shot up. "Oh. Wow, I hadn't even… thought about that." Then I deflated, staring down at the dirty platform. "But isn't it still a little… unpleasant? Some eighteen-year-old crawling all over an adult?"
"I doubt you would 'crawl' on her like that," Ann laughed. "But I get what you mean. Just… I know this is some huge, brand new thing. You're still figuring it out. But if she ends up making you happy, then… you owe it to yourself to go for it! Don't let anybody tell you what you need besides your own heart!"
"Ann," I laughed. But the earnestness in her expression stopped me short. "Ann… you really think that? I should date my teacher?"
"Not 'your teacher'. You should date… Becky. Or whatever Becky's real name is - you don't have to tell me. But if you ever feel like you n-"
My hand pressed into her mouth. "Stop, stop. Thank you. But yeah, I guess I have a lot of thinking to do. What am I going to do about this situation with her working herself to death for those two awful people? That on top of me being attracted to her is… the whole thing is a mess."
"UGH! I wish I knew who it was - my advice would be better!" When I glared, she held up a hand, eyes closed. "Don't tell me. That wasn't me trying to get you to cave, just being frustrated that I can't help more."
"Sure, sure." Suddenly, I threw my arms around her. I wasn't used to doing that, but maybe it was time I started putting in more effort in that regard. "Thanks, Ann. You're an incredible friend."
After only a brief hesitation, she hugged back. "Hey, it's okay. I got you." There was no holding back because I might be gay, no jokes. Just firm acceptance. I couldn't have asked for anything more.
~ x JUDGMENT x ~
"Well, that is wonderful to hear," Sae sighed wearily, rubbing her temples. "But having a supportive friend doesn't answer the question at hand. We're supposed to be talking about the nature of your relationship with Sadayo Kawakami. If all you did was rub her feet once, then I suppose I can overlook any allegations of misconduct with a student under her care."
The younger Niijima shifted in her seat, trying to abate her tension and discomfort. "I was hoping you would do that anyway. As a favour to me."
"You know I can't do that. The law is the law, and you are one of her students. Even if you're old enough to decide for yourself who you date."
"I am?" she asked, genuinely surprised.
"Yes. I might be your legal guardian, but…" With a helpless shrug, she added, "All I can do is tell you it's unwise. After that, the choice is all yours."
"Dating women, or dating Sadayo?"
"Both. Unwise specifically because she's so much older than you, but also because she is a sex worker. Regardless," she rushed ahead when she saw Makoto was about to protest, "of whether or not her sexual activities in her job as Delivery Health maid are minimal, and rarely utilised. It's still not nothing, and you could wind up with an infection. You're my responsibility, and that includes making sure you don't get sick."
"Well…" Dipping her head, she admitted, "You have a point. And I do appreciate you looking out for me, Sis. But I would put my love for someone before any worry about risks like that. Not saying I 'love' Sadayo; just clarifying my priorities."
Sae picked up her pen and began clicking over and over. Just a nervous tick to help distract herself from being unduly upset. "Fine, fine. I suppose that's… admirable, in a foolish way. But as interesting as it is, I don't know why you bothered telling me about this conversation with Takamaki."
The truth was, she was jealous of the blonde. Ann got to freely and openly offer Makoto her support in a way Sae never could; she didn't get to be the 'big sister' anymore. Now she had to be her parent, until such a time as Makoto grew up and left the house - entered the workforce of Japan for real. Even then, she would probably always have to look out for her best interests for the rest of her life.
"It will be important later. And… I'm sorry."
Sae's eyebrow went up. "Sorry? For what?"
"That I can't simply let you believe all I've done with Sadayo is letting her bathe me and paying her back with a massage," she went on in a near-silent voice. "There's definitely more, and I promised you the whole story. So yeah, sorry about this in advance, but… I have to keep going."
Heart sinking down into the floor, she whispered, "Very well. Continue."
To Be Continued…
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