#* oh also this takes place pre-bday party too

[acridcandy]

& that's just how we do it ⏤ featuring @sourires

"baaaabe," aera coos, pivoting to face her friend with a pout, "don't look like that, it'll be super fun. i think i need this? we need this!" she grins as if this isn't the third time that she's been out this week, it only being a wednesday. as if the reality of a test in their shared class on the next day isn't a thought within aera's mind, especially considering that she hasn't cracked open a book ( outside of class ) in god knows how long.

the general idea is what hyejung attempts to get through to her, always the dulcet tempered angel on her shoulder that makes a valiant effort to lead her away from temptation. and as her beacon of light amidst the stormy seas that makes her life in this year, her best friend that faithfully remains by her side throughout it all, her words naturally hold more weight that anyone in her life. and yet the two of them still find themselves in the back seat of her drivers car, on their way to arrive at the club of choice within a couple of minutes. it's quite foolish to waste effort on altering aera's thinking once she decides on an idea, no matter how detrimental it may be, so instead of indulging in a back and forth with her friend she throws out the idea of coming along so she doesn't get too trashed. and it's not a form of manipulation to get what she desires, but a genuine matter considering that hyejung is not the one for nightlife; instead it's some form of a compromise, she thinks. and maybe their perspectives are aligned since she agrees, a sense of warmth permeating her body before pulling hyejung into a hug.

"oh! by the way, you saw that stupid post gossip girl put about me having a fucking addiction? isn't there a way that i can, like, sue her for slander or something? because i'm going to be so real right now and say the only thing that was true was me being kicked out a bar, but that's because the owner is lame, broke, and likes to be mean to pretty girls," she rants in an attempt to divert while fishing out her phone from her clutch, "so ... i miiight have said some little bittle teeny white lies about that on my insta stories and made the place look bad, and my followers totally bombed their reviews online. i think they're currently at 1.5 stars when you search them up," she chuckles, satisfaction reverberating off the interior of the vehicle as she turns the screen in hyejung's direction to view the infinite amount of deception displayed, "do you love that for me? i love it for me. anyway that's why we're going to insomnia instead since one, they probably won't let me back in because of this; and two, the owner isn't mad at the world because he has a receding hairline and his kids don't love him or whatever."

[herestheteaig]

What should I do??

Hi, I don’t really know if anyone will see this but I'm gonna try, just incase. If you do choose to respond, you can be as brutally honest & unbiased as you’d like, I’m not easily offended.

I am f19, and have been in a relationship with m18 for almost 6 years. For the sake of his privacy lets call him Joe.

lets call me Mina.

Backstory:

- Joe & I have been together since we were 13, we went to the same secondary school & college (for Americans, same middle school & high school)

- we had been close friends since we were like 11, very visibly super close friends in school.

- when we started dating at the end of our second year, we spent the entire summer together.

- when we got back he just... pretended I didn't exist????

- like tf?

- anyway, we were still hanging out outside of school, but my school separate the year based on grades in third year, so I was placed in X and he was placed in Y, therefore we had 0 classes together

- though, in the corridors, at lunch, at break, etc, he’d pretend I didn't exist???

- he also told me not to tell anyone we were dating???

- this lasted maybe 2 years? until I got really mad and he started acknowledging me in our final year of secondary school & people knew we were dating.

- his mum ended up convincing me to apply to the same college as him, we did different courses so rarely saw each other, but occasionally took the train together on one of our mutual starting times.

- now, I go to university about 2 hours away from our hometown and live there, he doesn’t go to university at all.

the catfish:

- of course the initial: “don’t tell anyone we’re dating”

- when I was still 13, I did something SUPER childish, though no regrets and made a fake iMessage account so he’d think someone was texting him.

- I used Loren Gray’s picture because this boy had NO social medias, he was SO anti it.

- anyway, pretended I had gotten his number on Facebook, and that I had seen him at athletics (he’s an athlete) and I thought he was attractive and asked if he had a girlfriend

- then we went through this long “no I don't” “jk I do” back and forth bullshit. 

- oh he also didn't tell me about her until I said she had messaged me, but whatever idc but that's the first piece of info. 

Sabrina:

- next, I must've been 15?? idk exactly how old I am

- I do not and have NEVER cared who my boyfriend talks to, girl, boy, non-binary, whatever, I don't give a shit. 

- so I'm on his phone, taking snapchats to save to his memories and I kept seeing this girls name pop up. 

- let’s call her Sabrina.

- I had noticed he talks to her a LOT, but he never had mentioned her, but eh its whatever... probably just one of his friends, right?

- I used to just message his friends on his phone so I went onto her chat intending to be like “heyyyy bro, nice to meet you my name is Mina, do you wanna be friends?”

- but I'm seeing messages talking about: “what age would you have sex?”

- side note: he and I both lost our virginities when we were 15, later this year but at this point we had both been “handsy” down there??? 

- anyway she says “18″, he says “you know its legal at 16 tho right?

- “yeah, but still 18″

- “why not 16″

- whatever I don't remember the entire convo.

- so I was like hmm this is a bit sus and scrolled up to see their messages. 

- “do you have a girlfriend” “no” “actually yes” “im joking, no.”

- so im like wait what???

- anyway, I don't mention it for like 7 months? he denies it before saying what he said was innocent and he was just curious in a friendly way. 

- I let it go.

Kendall:

- I was probably 16 or almost 17 at this point 

- again, for privacy, we’ll call this girl Kendall.

- Kendall and I have a mutual friend, we’ll call her Tiana.

- Tiana and I were best friends.

- One day, Tiana messaged me and said hey, my friend Kendall was speaking to  Joe & realised wait isn't that Mina’s boyfriend and sent me these screenshots as soon as she realised.

- I had probably seen her name in his recent chats but didn't care enough to ask about it.

- anyway, the screenshots were just him being super flirty with emojis? like sounds childish but you know what I mean.

- and he was joking about “go to bed its past your bed time” and she was like “no why are you chatting, you’re up too”

- then. THEN. THIS BOI HAS THE AUDACITY.

- “shush and listen to your daddy”

- wHAT.

- I immediately confront him and he denies knowing anyone of that name at first, before saying oh I didn't mean it like that, it was like a mum/ dad joke we have

- so again, I let it go

Adrien:

- back in school, my maths teacher sent myself and this boy to the study area which is an open space in the school, visible from all levels.

- lets call him Adrien.

- note: adrien and I were both quite smart and in top set for most classes, our surnames are next to eachother on the register so were often seated beside each other. 

- we were very very close FRIENDS

- so we’re doing work, chatting a bit- whatever

- at some point, he jokingly pushes my head away, idk what I said, I do not remember. 

- note: the entire school is IN CLASS.

- a few seconds later, I feel my phone vibrate, sneak it out of my pocket to see a text from Joe: “why is Adrien touching your face?”

- I look around and no ones there, anyway he still gets mad about it now.

Other stuff:

- he used to threaten to kill himself if i broke up with him

- or if we were arguing he’d say he can do this anymore, imply suicide, the leave his phone for ages and get super mad if I contacted his sister or mum to find out if he was safe.

- sometimes i’d see him joking around on his sisters snapchat story when I'm panicking because he said he’d kill himself.

- I'm not materialistic, but the fact that he rarely would get me bday/xmas presents was kinda upsetting. (he has a lot of money, my family is broke but I make the BIGGEST deal out of xmas and his bday and everything)

- would work extra hours so he’d feel so so spoiled on xmas and his bday. 

- once he got me just a xmas themed toilet roll on Christmas, last year he gave me a small jar of vegan candies.

- I think he acknowledged valentines day twice in our relationship? 

- which was sad because pre-relationship, valentines was my fave day of the year & I'd hand out heart shaped chocolates to everyone at school.

- often blames his mental health on me.

- will cut me off and then act like I'm the one not listening to HIS problems. 

- if another guy has a crush on ME, then he gets mad at me?

- every boy in my college class admitted to having a crush on me at some point, awkward but my course was reliant on group projects so I couldn't just block them??? they all knew I had a bf

Extra:

- I have never orgasmed ONCE in my entire life... rip

- when I say he is ACTUALLY jealous, I mean like ACTUALLY jealous of me having a crush on like... cartoon characters?? (& also anime characters)

- has said sexist and transphobic things, that I DRAGGED him for.

- I think he's very manipulative and also immature. 

- hates that I'm smart

- HATES that my love language is acts of service. like HATES it.

- there's more but I won't bore you.

mini story:

- we went to Paris for my 18th birthday. 

- he tried to break up with me right before because “he feels like shit compared to other guys”

- I was crying down the phone (I never ever cry) begging him to reconsider

- we went to Paris, it was nice. 

- note: we also had sex there

- and then we get back and he says: “I hated you the entire time” and other stuff but I don't remember

this is according to him:

- I think I'm right all the time and think im little miss perfect

- I put in no effort

- I do not listen

- I just need to realise that all my male friends are only my friends because they want to fuck me.

- I do not care about anything

- I assume things 

- I compare him to other guys????

- I make him feel like shit 

(his words, though I disagree)

- we have been in a relationship for almost 6 years

- he’s my friend

- I love his family so much, I've watched his nephew grow up and I text his sister and I just love them.

- though he isn’t my type on paper, I do find him attractive 

- we have somewhat similar kinks

- my family seem to like him

- not gonna lie, we’d make cute babies.

- we both enjoy sports and also he sometimes plays video games with me (I'm an avid gamer, I twitch stream and play PC, PS4 & Switch, he sometimes will play fortnite or Mario kart with me)

- we have this cute cheerleader/ athlete thing which I like

- oh, right, pls don't judge this but its important to me to raise my children plant-based until they're old enough to decide for themselves- he isn't plant-based but is 100% onboard which is very important to me.

- has done cute things for me before like turn up at my house with my fave candy or buy an extra pack of gum/ drink for me.

- this sounds irrelevant, but I DO love to party/rave but I do not drink alcohol, I actually have a weird phobia of it, though I would 100% get high

- Joe and I both do not drink and although that's not something id look for in a s/o, it made me feel like I wasn't the only one lmao. 

- my first & only relationship

ANWYAY, we’ve been arguing for months, if you see this what do you think I should do? would it be overreacting to break up? I would still wanna be his friend because I care but I dunno what to do

[lanamemories]

lockwood nye | chatzy

SUMMARY: literally everyone kissed everyone. metaphorical blood was shed. lives were lost. no-one will ever be the same. jude ashed on gabe’s muffin and he ate it anyway. lana sucked imogen’s finger and caused all penises within a five mile radius to hoist their flagpole and sing the national anthem. jude and venus made out. twice. chloe grit her teeth at the anarchy and uttered the yikes that everyone else was thinking. magnolia and blake canoodled like an old married couple sat on the porch of a country ranch. a three way kiss stirred tensions. teddy and imogen locked lips and started a forest fire using the tension as kindling. hearts were broken. drinks were drank. ragrets were had. a lockwood new year’s eve for the ages.

magnolia: Maggie walked into the party, bright red cowboy hat on her head as she carried a similar blue one, popping it onto Gabe's head. "Happy Birthday Country Boy, I lurrve you!" She called out, before walking on in search of a drink with no further comment.

gabe: "Yeehaw," Gabe chimed in rather monotonously, tipping his hat to no one in particular as he watched Magnolia walk away.

blake: Anxiety making his chest feel tight, Blake's legs jiggled in rhythm with the music. He watched the party from a couch spot he'd snagged early in the night, his form well imprinted into the cushion now.

jude: "Booooooy!" Jude declared suddenly, pointing a finger repeatedly down at Blake's legs as they jiggled like noodle strands in front of a high power fan. "Look at them go."

blake: Blake tilted his head up at Jude, eyes narrowing slightly. "I didn't even notice. Ass," he mumbled into his red solo cup, clearing his throat as he placed the empty one down and reached over to grab the flask he'd been nursing all night, almost done too. "You look like a majestic creature...person from a period film. Fuck off."

magnolia: The girl finished making her rum and coke, heading back over to Gabe. "How does it feel to be an old man? Have you acquired a taste for lunchtime buffets yet?" She asked, poking his stomach like he was the Pillsbury Doughboy.

lana: Donning a star spangled pair of novelty glasses spelling out '2018' over both eyes, Lana practically pranced into the party like a fairy on acid, flashing Gabe a fiendish grin as she finally reached his side. "Gabriel! You're a stinky old man just like the rest of us sorry fools now. Anything to say on record?" she asked, pretending to hold up a tape recorder to his mouth.

arryn: She had already done a bit of pre-gaming before she went to the party, so when she arrived, she would instantly start having fun. Arryn entered through the door, bottle in hand. She took her time walking through the mass of attendees

gabe: Gabe jumped at the poke of his stomach, easily ticklish. He looked between Magnolia and Lana and tried to hold in his laughter. "Good evening, MTV, and welcome to my crib," he flashed his teeth at Lana's fake tape recorder. "I'm 21 now and quire frankly, I want to die slightly less than I did yesterday!"

arryn: and drank from the bottle as she drug along. Arryn finally made it to the one place she loved most, the booze table.

jude: "Quire frankly? Is that a relative of yours, perhaps?" Jude piped up after overhearing the conversation, flashing a politician's smile before redirecting his focus back to Blake. "You didn't even notice my ass? That's harsh, Blake. I polished it especially for this event."

magnolia: Maggie laughed as the unfamiliar girl held the tape recorder up to Gabe's face. "I'll leave you with your fans. Just wanted to wish you an official Happy Birthday," she told him, heading off in the direction to find more friends. She settled into the couch next to Blake, flashing a drunk grin at the two boys and tipping her hat. "Howdy, Cowboys!"

lana: "I don't know about you but I totally feel like that one gif of that woman screaming as she removes her wig. Like, that's just... the vibe for tonight, you know?" Lana nodded along, eyeing the dwindling contents of her cup before peering back at Gabe again. "You know it's, um... Aly! It's Aly's birthday tonight, too. Is this a joint bday bash?"

blake: "Is this event mandatory?" he called out to the party, not really expecting an answer. Blake sighed at Jude, shaking his head. "I'm glad you cleaned your ass, Jude. But that should be a regular thing," he said, glancing up just as Magnolia arrived. "Hey, nice outfit."

jude: "Don't be such a Negative Norman, Blake," Jude criticised halfheartedly, taking a swig from the beer in his cup before he raised it in a toast-like greeting over Maggie's arrival. "Alright, goblin? Gnash on the toes of any particularly lanky ghouls yet? I have my third eye on one named Margaret."

gabe: "Is it?" he raised his eyebrows at Lana. "I think she mentioned it was her birthday too but we aren't every close. Assumed she'd have her own party?" He shrugged. "The event is mandatory, you belligerent goblin," he called back at Gabe. "Invite me to you and Mags' wedding!"

magnolia: "Gentleman," she greeted them, raising her drink, her voice formal. "I had my eyes on a particularly thicc with two c's spector, be he ran off before I could astral project into his plane," she told Jude. Her cheeks grew bright red at Gabe's comment yelled across the room. "We're not getting married until ghouls have the right to wed too!" She called back lamely.

blake: Blake reached over the table to retrieve a chip from one of the food bowls, nipping off the end before deciding against eating and tossing it back on the table. Blake winced slightly as Gabe called out to him, sighing heavily. "Sorry about my friend, his mouth smells of feet because they're always in his mouth," he said to no one.

gabe: "I heard that!"

jude: "Shame. They're always scuttling these days. Ghouls just can't be trusted," Jude sighed so solemnly, it was as if he was recounting the death of an old friend. It was only at Gabe's comment that his playful demeanour wavered slightly, scoff parting his lips after a second long delay. "Stop it, Blake. You know Gabe has a thing for feet... He'll get hard a hundred miles and hour and poke a poor girl's eye out."

blake: Blake was in the middle of taking a swig from his vodka when he nearly spat the contents out, wiping a bit of the alcohol from his skin. "Jesus Chroist."

gabe: "Bold claim from someone who gave a girl thrush because he fingered her the wrong way," Gabe grinned at Jude. "Who do you think I am? Quentin Tarantino?"

lana: "Gabe! You have to be a gracious host. Just... Promise you'll offer her some chips and dip if she turns up. It's her birthday, I feel bad. She won't even get a celebratory spank from Frankie like I do every year. That's a crime," she sighed loudly, aimlessly dusting a bit of imaginary lint from Gabe's shoulder. "God. Tramp."

magnolia: Maggie flung her feet up on the arm of the couch, leaning her head back to drain the contents of her glass. She gasped as Blake spat out the contents of his glass. "Guys! Blake is so bored he would actually rather choke. Help the poor sweet summer child."

jude: "Fuck off, cretin! That was just a rumour," Jude refuted, reaching over and slapping at Gabe's ass like a parent might with a miscreant child. "Enough of that backchat, young man."

gabe: "You make it sound like we're a married couple and we're hosting our annual New Years dinner party. I'm not Gatsby," he sighed, pouring a mixture of alcohol into his red solo cup. "I'll find her and we can... pop bottles of champagne together like old men did in the 1950s. Here's to 2018, fuckers!"

blake: "We should..." he glanced over to Magnolia. "You're right, we should play a game or something."

jude: "He's wasting away," Jude solemnly announced, clapping a hand down onto Blake's shoulder with a furrowed brow. "Somebody should've had more breast milk as a baby... Brittle boned. Weak."

gabe: "Oh, daddy," he retaliated towards Jude. "Please, spank me harder. I'm the birthday boy, after all."

blake: "I'm gonna fucking punch him," Blake mumbled under his breath, mostly to himself. "What's your problem?" he asked, brows furrowed as he glanced over to Jude.

lana: Involuntary flush creeping up into her cheeks, Lana pressed the cool side of her cup against her throat, rolling it there absently in a fit of boredom. "Do you really have a foot kink, Gabe? Look into my eyes and tell the truth. Don't be a coward."

jude: Eyebrows knitting slightly, he offered Blake a bewildered expression, lowering his voice a notch. "What? The breast milk thing was a joke, man," came as he patted his shoulder a hint harder than necessary, moving his hand away after. "We're good."

magnolia: Maggie sat up, fingers nervously clutching the cup in her hand as her other hand drifted towards Blake's arm before she thought better of it. "Who wants a shot?" She declared, voice wavering.

gabe: "I don't have a fucking foot kink," Gabe pleaded, smile plastered on his face as he took another gulp from his cup. He kicked Lana with the side of his sneaker gently. "Why? Do you? Do YOU have something you'd like to tell me?"

blake: "I'll -- I'll take a shot," Blake said, cut off just before he could finish the sentence with the slap against his back. "Alright! We're good. Fantastic," he replied, not entirely believing it, but knowing he'd only get heated if he persisted.

lana: "Once I had a wet dream about one of the thumb men from Spy Kids," Lana sighed honestly, thumb smoothing along the rim of her red cup. "I won't even lie, it was pretty hot. I don't regret it. Also, me! I'll do a shot. I'm like a dehydrated camel in the outback. Rasping for mercy."

chloe: Chloe walked into the party, and immediately began the search for a drink or someone she knew— she wasn't terribly picky about the order. Not too far away was Gabe, the birthday boy, surrounded by a few more friendly faces. "Happy birthday!" she said as she arrived, ruffling Gabe's hair. "What'd I miss?"

magnolia: "Cool. Awesome," she said hurriedly, getting up off the couch and taking off towards the drink table with Blake in tow, meeting up with Lana along the way. She poured drinks for all of them, plus a few more for anyone else that wanted one. "Look me in the eyes when you clink or it's bad head for ten years!"

gabe: "That's... the most the disgusting thing I've heard all night besides Tripp admitting he's into bestiality," Gabe said, grabbing a handle of Smirnoff from the fridge. "And after that, I need a shot."

jude: Flopping down onto one of the adjacent couches, Jude popped open his tin of rolling papers and started thumbing through the contents, setting about fixing himself a joint. "Fuck. Anyone got any filters?"

gabe: "Chloe!" Gabe beamed, bringing the brunette into an awkward side-hug. "Thanks. You didn't miss much. Collectively? We're on our way to getting fucked up. Emotionally? I sense a tension in the air. Not like I haven't experienced that on any other of my birthdays though."

lana: "Whoa. I totally thought you said look me in the eyes when you twink for a second there. Mindfuck. I was spinning my head around like the Mr. Krabs meme looking for the nearest toyboy," Lana scoffed, plucking up the shot and reaching out to knock glasses before she tossed it back.

blake: Sighing and running his hand over the back of his neck, he glanced over the Jude and mouthed a simple 'What the fuck?' in his direction. "Yeah, I got some," he said, leaning forward to pry them out of his back pocket, tossing the pack onto the coffee table.

chloe: "Oh, excellent," she laughed, scooting into an empty seat. "I'm trying to look God in the eyes by the end of tonight. Fuck me up."

gabe: "You could look God in the eyes if you just got on your knees... and prayed. With a bible," Gabe stammered, in horror of the awkwardness that just ensued from his mouth. "Welcome to Bible study, we're all children of Jesus!" He looked over to Magnolia, who was downing shots already. "Kumbaya... my lord..."

magnolia: "God. I just had a flashback to that dude in the leather suit from American Horror Story," she told Lana. "Tonight I drink to forget Michael Scott bending Evan Peters over and spanking him on The Office."

jude: "Noice," Jude emphasised like his accent had suddenly warped into that of an Australian crocodile wrangler, reaching forwards to snatch up the filters and pry one from the rest. Plucking a rolling paper free, he slithered it onto Blake's lap in pitiful means of a half-assed apology.

venus: "I've arrived, Thots!" Venus shouted at the bustling crowd, particularly to the few faces she recognized immediately. Her fur coat and sparkly dress screamed New York socialite, and her brain was screaming for a drink. "What's all the hubbub, boys?"

blake: "I'm good, man. Already on enough," he said to Jude, laughing with the admittance. "Where did Maggie go with our shots, though? The real question."

lana: "DON'T mention spanking and Evan Peters in the same sentence. My frail heart can't take it. I was one of the abominable thots that wanted to take a ride on the Langdon express. It was a dark time," she exhaled mournfully, coughing slightly to escape the bitter taste of vodka in the back of her throat. "Gross. I feel like I just sucked on Satan's teat."

chloe: "Ah, so I guess you want a church girl that go to church.... and read her Biiiible," Chloe said, expression unchanging but her voice shifting to imitate the Vine. "We love Bible study!" she yelped, taking a shot.

jude: "Think she left with Lana or, uh... Dunno," Jude offered along with a shrug, licking a stripe along his paper before he smoothed it together. "Vanished into the abyss. Dicks out for Magambe."

magnolia: "He was a hunk-a-thon, I'll give you that," Maggie said, her voice suddenly warping into a Valley Girl accent. "Shit! I forgot that the gentlemen and I scheduled a very important business meeting. Gotta bring the materials," she told Lana, gathering up a few shots and bringing them back over to Blake and Jude. "Boys, i've brought the third quarter numbers."

gabe: "Don't-" Gabe stuttered as Chloe took the shot, wrinkling his nose at thought of consuming the mixture. "God, that was... the equivalent of isopropyl alcohol. I don't even know what mixture was in that Smirnoff bottle, but it wasn't Smirnoff. Please don't sue."

teddy.: Walking through the threshold into the BKE living room, Teddy managed to juggle three chocolate chip muffins in one hand and a red solo cup in the other. Mouth already half full, Teddy approached Jude and Blake with all the seriousness of a businessman looking to close a deal. "Have you guys been in the washroom lately? I found, like, twenty muffins there. Want one? I can grab more. They're so good. I hope they weren't meant for Gabe cause I already ate two."

imogen: Walking in, eyes red and squinted from the few joints she had enjoyed on the walk over, Imogen entered the party, in an unusual attired of plain black jeans and a hoodie. Entering the house, she immediately found her way towards the messy table of crumpled chips and began munching.

blake: Blake laughed, feeling a little more at ease now that Jude had seemed to calm down from whatever had peeved him off earlier. A sigh of relief escaped when Magnolia returned, sitting up straighter. "Thank god, I was about to zamboni the table." As Teddy approached, Blake relaxed even more, smile on his face. "Can't say I have, Who put muffins in the washroom?"

venus: "Whose birthday is it?" Venus asked towards no one in particular. She spotted a kind-looking girl on the couch and plopped down next to her. "I see Jude's up to his wild antics again. Lana, right?"

jude: "Anyone got a light?" Jude called out aimlessly, flailing his head around like a child long lost in a convenience store. "Blease... Halp... I'm just a little baby boy!" Discontinuing his absurd cries once Teddy arrived, Jude lazily flung a leg out, poking at his friend's shin in means of fond greeting. "Hello, my son. What the fuck is a muffin--" he stuttered into silence, wedging his joint in place. "A muffin doing in a washroom, anyway?"

gabe: "Why are there muffins in the washroom?" Gabe asked, snatching one from Teddy's hand. "I don't see a cake anywhere so I'm hoping this is for me. Anyone got a singular candle I can put on this?"

magnolia: Maggie handed Blake a shot, trying not to spill any of it, sitting on the arm of the couch. She knocked back the vodka, wincing as she did so. "Nope, I just got zamboni-ed. Petition to use zamboni more in every day conversation. Shit. I'm drunk."

teddy.: "No, Gabe!" Teddy protested, voice taking on the whiny tone of a two year old who doesn't get their way. "Those were for my less fortunate friends! We can't all have birthdays today, y'know."

imogen: Answering to the calls of a frantic Jude, Imogen pulled the tiny bic out of her jean pocket and held it out, walking towards them. "I'm no hero, I put on my pants one leg at a time like everyone else, only I remember to bring a lighter"

lana: "Hi!" Lana greeted as earnestly as a golden retriever introduced to a new owner, corners of her red lips tweaking. "Yeah, Lana. Venus, right? Or, I guess... Weenus, according to Jude. He's a mongrel, ignore him. I try to."

blake: Lowering down his vodka as Maggie did, he sighed in relief, though it burned his throat. "You alright?" he asked Magnolia in a mumbled, glancing over to her on the end of the sofa.

chloe: Chloe's face crumpled after downing the contents of her cup, mouth puckered in disgust. "Oh, man," she groaned. "That is diabolical. Who's trying to kill you on your birthday?"

jude: Plucking the Bic off Imogen, Jude offered a wise smile like Gatsby overlooking his crowd of party guests in means of thanks, sparking up and sucking in a long drag before reaching over to ash on Gabe's muffin. "Bone app the titty." Turning back to Imogen after, he patted the space besides him. "Sit. You've earned a place besides the king -- I'm not calling myself that, by the way. Blake said it was fitting earlier."

venus: "Or better yet... penis!" Venus flashed a ruby red smile, raising an eyebrow as her gaze followed towards Jude's presence. "Looks like someone's getting... laid?" She watched as a brunette stumbled upon Jude flickering a lighter. "Oh, god. Is she trying to set him on fire?"

gabe: Gabe giggled at Chloe's crumpled face as it matched his own, a good amount of the strange tonic already inside his system. "Some sadist who's never been to bartender school apparently," he replied, pulling out a bottle of Spite from the counter and pouring the contents into the remainder of the cup. "Here. A chaser will make it better. I mixed mine with a bunch of a juice and I'm more off the rails than a thirteen year old boy at 3 am off a Four Loko."

magnolia: She nodded her head, giving him a smile. "Peachy. Living my diddly darn best life,"she said, trying to shake off the nervous feeling that accompanied her at parties. "Your hair smells good tonight. Like shampoo or something," she stated, fingers combing through it before dropping them nervously.

lana: "God! He'll probably cry out a lyric from The Smiths when he climaxes. To DIE by YoUr SiDe," she wailed out unevenly, eyes rolling back into her head as she reached around like a blind person for dramatic effect. "Terrible. I hope Imogen's prepared. Also... Huh. You know what we should play? Truth or dare."

venus: "True!" Venus emphasized, pointing her finger at Lana as if she made a breakthrough discovery. "Last time I played that I got someone to streak outside in the dead of winter. I can make anyone a victim tonight."

blake: "Shampoo would likely be it," he said, quiet laugh parting his lips for only a moment. It was strange being here, outside of his room on the worst night of Blake's year. But the company was nice, as long as things stayed civil. "Lana. Yes. A game. Please," he said, reaching up to hook his pinky into Magnolia's to draw her hand back to his head.

imogen: A proud look beamed across Imogen's face as she plopped next to Jude. "You can be the king all you want, at the end of the day things did not end well for Macbeth" she replied, snatching the joint from his fingers and dangling it off her lip, inhaling the smoke smoothly.

jude: Catching a glimpse of Maggie and Blake from the corner of his eye, Jude reached up to itch far more furiously than necessary at his tear duct, eye squeaking in protest. "Whoa. Stuart Little, uh, crying for mercy, there. Wild," he chuckled under his breath, focusing on Imogen once more. "Macbeth was just like Chicken Little. Dumb and he's a coward. You can't just come over here... Reap my harvest," he gestured at his joint in her mouth, "and PISS on the rest of my metaphorical crops. I'm distraught."

venus: Venus made her way through the crowd, stumbling in the dimness as she tripped over someone's foot and half-landed on someone's lap. "Fuck! You absolute gremlins!" she called out towards no one in particular. She looked over and found herself resting on top of Judas' knee as her eyes lit up, giving him a peck between his hairline and his forehead. "Judas! You're like a blessing dressed as a grungy band member. How is the evening treating you? Have you killed Jesus yet?"

magnolia: She continued playing with his hair gently, nodding her head as someone mentioned truth or dare. "Yes! I'm gonna find out who everyone has a crush on tonight." She glimpsed Jude talking to a girl she didn't know out of the corner of her eye, whipping her haze away sharply.

gabe: "Lana, do you have a candle? Or a fucking joint so I can blow out something anyway? This crowd's got me stressed," Gabe stumbled over, nearly knocking over the petite girl. "I feel like Jude and Blake are gonna tussle."

jude: "Whoa! Fuckin' hell, all aboard, I guess," Jude strained out as he shuffled beneath Venus' flailing limbs to get comfortable, looking every bit like Patrick Star mid coma as his arms fanned out around her. Eventually, he settled for steadying her gently by the waist, offering Imogen a sheepish smile. "Full house. It's like a nineties sitcom."

lana: "A CANDLE?!" Lana quoted like he'd just garbled out a sentence in ancient Latin, eyes bugging out of her head like the meme of the fish in Spongebob holding a glass of juice. "Who do you think I am, Gabe? A Bed, Bath and Beyond store? Disgusting! I just spat."

blake: Lowering down the rest of his vodka, Blake tossed the flask on the table. "Jude! Truth or dare."

venus: Venus looked up, surprised at the sight of the other girl. "Oh, fuck, I'm such a tramp aren't I?" she turned her back towards Jude again, narrowing her eyes. "You've got your arms around my waist while this woman is trying to fuck you?" she nearly hissed. "Am I cockblocking or can I join?"

jude: "Hey, whoa," Jude blustered hastily, glancing between the pair of them with a face of vague distress. "I'm just a little boy..." he trailed off vaguely, hoping that excuse, enough, would suffice, before realising he probably had to say more for himself. "Everything's fine. Make love, not war. We're all human beings."

imogen: Imogen handed the joint back to Jude and laughed at Venus' comment. "No, I'm not- no worries. I'm too high for this right now anyway. I think I'm gonna grab something to drink" she replied. pushing herself off the couch and walking away from the couch.

gabe: "You're all for birthdays aren't you? What am else am I going to blow?" Gabe answered frantically. "Wait, don't answer that." He took nearly inhaled the muffin in his hands regardless, squinting at Lana as he swallowed. "Oh... these are? Edibles? Suddenly I'm exiting this plane of existence."

jude: "Oh, Christ. It's Armageddon," Jude mumbled solemnly into Venus' hair, accidentally getting a strand in his mouth and spluttering helplessly in the aftermath. "Fuckin' hell. Look what you did, Venus. She practically took off on all fours. Imogen!" he called lazily around Venus, flailing a rogue arm. "Bring back rations!"

magnolia: Maggie scooted closer towards Blake's side, brushing her hair out of her face as she leaned her head on his shoulder. "Judas! You were asked a question. Truth or dare?"

lana: Sucking in such a frantic gust of air at his statement that she nearly choked on it, she wildly flung a hand out to grab his shoulder for support, coughing into his shirt sleeve before composing herself. "Didn't Jude just ash on that earlier? Gross."

venus: Mouth agape, Venus pushed herself towards the end of the couch so only her legs rested on Jude's lap. "Oh, no! I totally fucked everything up for you! I'm sorry!" she pleaded, taking a gulp of her wine bottle. "So no threesome?" She glanced back at the rest of the room, realizing they were suddenly in the middle of a game. "Ah! It's time for the moment of truth!"

jude: "Hm ha hmhmhm ha?" Jude responded in reference to the iconic Yoda parody, wiping absently at a crumb that had somehow pinged and wound up on his eyelash before meeting Maggie's gaze. "What question? Oh... Uh. Dare, I guess. And don't worry, Weenus," came as he tapped sympathetically at her shins, nodding once over. "I forgive you."

gabe: "He WHAT?" Gabe blurted, catching Lana has she nearly fell into his arms. "What the fuck? I've eaten an edible that Judas ashed on. Incredible. I better see God right in his fucking face in the next twenty minutes."

lana: Slouching in Gabe's arms even after she'd steadied her composure, Lana peered up at him, neck retracted in on itself to impersonate a bleary eyed infant. "I look totally like baby Moses like this. It's kind of erotic, actually. If--... Wait, are dares starting?" she perked up from Gabe's limp hold, peering around like a meerkat.

blake: "I dare you..." he started, before gesturing toward Venus, "to make out with her." Considering she was easily accessible, he figured it was doable. "Then rate it from 1 to 10.

chloe: Chloe found her way back to the group, the front of her shirt soaked with an unidentifiable alcohol. "Someone just fuckin spilled their entire drink on me," she huffed to no one in particular, slipping into the circle to watch the game.

imogen: Mixing herself a concoction of whatever kind of liquor was on the table closest to her, Imogen smelled the red solo cup before wincing and taking a swig. Before returning to the couch, this time taking a seat on the arm of the sofa. Hearing the dare, the girl picked herself off the spot she had just settled in and went to sit next to chloe to avoid being in the splash zone.

gabe: "Daaaaares," Gabe murmured, more crossfaded than the time he was seventeen and inadvertently pissed on the neighbors lawn. He yanked on Lana's hand towards the circle in the living room. "Chloe! We're playing Saw Four! Mags over here is that Jigsaw fellow and she's gonna make us do tricks!"

chloe: "Amazing," Chloe replied, laughing at Gabe's inebriated state. "I want to see the tricks!"

jude: "Rate it? Jesus Christ," Jude huffed out along with a light laugh, rubbing at the scruff of his jaw before he shifted a glance towards Venus. "Well... alright, then," came along with a shrug, hand slipping easily to steady her thigh so that his other could catch her by the jaw and tug her promptly closer. It was a performance fit for a glimpse through a peep show that he put on, knuckles inadvertently bunching beneath the hem of Venus' skirt as he tasted the remnants of rum on her lips, nearly smiling against them at just how soft they felt. Pulling back and imitating an Italian chef kissing his fingers and throwing them outwards, Jude hastily retracted his hand from her leg. "Jesus. Sorry. Feral. I'd, uh... I'd rate it a sophisticated seven. Thanks and goodnight, New York."

magnolia: She picked up another one of the shots she had brought over earlier, choking it back as she watched Jude and Venus make out. "Great. Fucking showstopping, Pornhub will give you good ratings," Maggie said, forcing a laugh. "Who wants to go next?"

venus: Venus couldn't help but burst into laughter when she pulled back, her hair frizzier than an early morning fuck and her lipstick smudged. She wiped the side of her mouth to clean up. "No one asked me but it was a good six. Would've been a seven had he not nearly eaten my face!"

blake: Blake shifted somewhat uncomfortably at the display, nearly regretting his decision to dare him that immediately. Once Jude had finished with the kiss, he laughed, raising his brows. "Just a seven? Jesus," he said, clearing his throat. Glancing up to Magnolia, her reaction was rather transparent, but Blake said nothing. Instead, he chewed at his nail and squeezing Maggie's hand with the other. "Who's going next, then?"

jude: Clearing his throat casually, Jude held a hand out towards Imogen post kiss, wiggling his fingers like he was hinting she pass him a cookie. "Did you... Wait. You got my smoke?"

magnolia: "I'll go," she told everyone. "I'll do dare."

teddy: Slowly taking a sip of his drink while glancing between Magnolia, Jude, and Venus in turn, Teddy finally made eye contact with Jude over his cup, giving him an over exaggerated thumbs up and a wink, mouthing the word "Noice" at him like they were back in grade ten and Jude had just had his first kiss ever.

jude: Shooting Teddy a total of three winks back, he entered into a sort of Morse code battle via eye, throwing him the odd one every so often when the feeling struck. "Dare! Mags chose dare. Uh... Huh. Anyone got one?"

lana: "I dare Mag--... Maggie? Maglin," Lana announced before clearing her throat, cup raised to her mouth like a microphone, "to kiss the prettiest boy in the room."

imogen: "I thought I gave it back to you" Imogen replied to Jude, a look of paranoia on her face now as she, stupidly, checked her pockets. "Maybe you inhaled it" she offered, plopping down with a shrug.

jude: "Ah, tits. She's gone, boys!" Jude called out to no-one in particular, clasping at his cheeks like the screaming man from Edvard Munch's painting. "Fucking R.I.P. It's cool, I'll roll another, I guess."

gabe: "Judas," Gabe started with a deadpan voice. "Why did you ash on my weed muffin? On my twenty-first? The audacity. Do you know how blurry my vision is right now?"

teddy: Making his way over to Jude, Teddy clapped him on the shoulder before nudging Imogen to the side, "Scoot, Im, best friend coming through." He mumbled, throwing his legs over Imogen's once he'd sat. "That kiss is going into my spank bank for later tonight, just so you know."

imogen: Imogen reached into the pocket of her hoodie and pulled out a pink plastic cigarette case. Dipping her fingers into it, she retrieved a tightly rolled joint and leaned over to hand it to Jude. "Peace offering" she said, smiling also at Venus.

imogen: Throwing her hands over Teddy's shins, Imogen nodded. "Mine too"

jude: "Pranked! You've been pranked," Jude declared suddenly, whipping his joint into view right around the same time Imogen gave him a fresh one. "Oh, fuck. Overflowing. I'm drowning... So many. Too many men..."

venus: Hair strewn across the end of the couch, Venus' head shot up at the acknowledgement of another person. "Oh, you're a doll!" she gushed at Imogen, taking her joint gladly. "Though I'm not sure what you mean. Are we fighting? Baby, what have I done? I'll get on my knees and everything."

magnolia: Maggie looked like a deer caught in the headlights as Lana announced her dare. She finished off a sip of vodka that was left in her shot glass. "Shit. Okay, fine." She stood up, making her way over to Gabe who still had Lana in his arms. "Make way for Thomas the Train engine," she told Lana, extracting the boy from underneath her as she sat down on the couch. She pulled him in by his shirt for a kiss, hesitant at first with all the eyes on her, but her hands wandering up to tangle in his hair as the kiss deepened. "Wow," she said in the voice of the kid from Vine as they separated.

lana: "Begone, thot!" Lana exclaimed with a prominent wrinkle of her nose, swatting at the prying hands of a frat boy leering in from behind her around the circle. It was only then that she whipped around to clock Maggie, a quick hop seeing her clear the path. "It's like a hundred mile an hour moshpit in here. Cold and afraid... Hope diminishing."

teddy: "What the hell was the prank? Not your best work, Jude." Teddy mumbled, grabbing the joint Jude was currently brandishing. Lifting it to his mouth to take a drag, Teddy stopped halfway to the destination, mouth agape at the scene Maggie and Gabe put on for them, "HOOTY HOO!" He shouted, practically right in Jude's ear.

venus: Hands entangled in Maggie's hair, Gabe nearly fell backward as the girl was on top of him, lips locked. As she pulled back, his face was amused in bewilderment, considering he barely heard what the last dare was. "Happy birthday to me?" he mumbled, looking around like a puppy to the rest of the room. "That was... fun."

jude: "Shut your wretched little mouth, boy," Jude grit out like he was a medieval lord from Game of Thrones, jest clear in his tone before he clocked the make out across the circle. Lips pressed into a thin line as Teddy bellowed, Jude pushed his cheek away from his ear a little harder than necessary. "Oh. Sorry."

imogen: Imogen shook her head, "No need to get on your knees. My apologies. I shouldn't have been so hasty about the threesome" she replied, before her sight darted towards Magnolia and Gabe.

lana: Eyeing Gabe at the side of her like the human manifestation of a disgruntled moon emoji, Lana slurped rather obnoxiously from her cup, rattling the dwindling contents after to distract a niggling thought at the back of her brain. "Who's next! I'll go. I'm feeling spicy."

venus: Venus widened her eyes, flailing her legs as she straightened herself on the couch and nearly kicking Jude's face in the process. "Judas! Did you hear that? Immy wants a threesome!" She buried her hands in hair as if he was a new golden retriever. "God. Amazing."

teddy: "Ow! You fuckin' Thot. Was your first makeout not satisfactory enough?" Teddy whined, rubbing at his cheek like Jude had winded back and personally tried to hit Teddy as hard as he could.

blake: On a normal night, Blake would have likely been jealous, but only in a subtle way. However, tonight, he felt rather numb to most things and couldn't help but think the birthday boy was, in fact, deserving of a kiss. And he looked the part. Laughing softly, he raised one of the shot glasses. "To the birthday boy, you've been deflowered in front of us all."

magnolia: "Sorry for the ambush," she said with a small laugh, grabbing the cowboy hat that had fallen off her head and settling back into her position next to Blake, bringing her knees under her arms. "It's his birthday He deserves to be pretty."

blake: "He is pretty, I agree," Blake said, laughing softly as he nudged Magnolia. "Someone give Lana a truth or dare, she's weeping over there."

gabe: "Are you saying I'm not pretty on a normal basis?" Gabe replied in mock disgust. "These curls? Bounce naturally, for your information."

jude: "Who's Emmy?" Jude blinked in sheer confusion, only piecing together what she'd actually said moments later. "Oh, fuck. Oh... Fuck. What? What's... going on? He needs some milk..." he mumbled under his breath, faking a frantic massage at his own temples.

imogen: "Which is it Lana, truth or dare?" Imogen called out from the couch.

magnolia: "Lana I... Dare you to give a lap dance to the person of your choosing."

lana: Tossing back the last of her punch, Lana defiantly hopped up to her feet, going the extra mile of crushing up her cup and throwing it to the floor purely for the dramatics. "I feel like a great white shark looking for the fattest swimmer to chomp on. Kind of arousing, honestly," she stated coolly as she eyed the circle, eventually pausing in her slow stride around it once she reached Imogen. "You. You look kind of like a dusty little choir boy, I dig it," came as she slipped onto her lap without warning, thighs hitched up to delicately straddle her. Snatching up her hand, she ground her hips easily with the oncoming dips of bass, a brief kiss pressed against the tops of her knuckles before she boldly slipped a first finger into her mouth and sucked on it. Lips tweaking as she pulled her hand back with a pop, Lana leaned in and pressed a scarlet kiss to Imogen's forehead like a sinful baptism, rising up to her feet after a few more tortuous shifts. "Bone app the teet! She tasted kind of like beef jerky. 5/10, do not recommend."

chloe: "Oh my god, she said beef jerky," Chloe gasped, finding the whole thing unbelievably funny. "Who's next?"

venus: Venus raised her hand. "I've got a lying Pinocchio shooting straight out of my skirt, to say the least. Lana, please me, next!"

teddy: Chuckling as Lana sauntered over to Imogen, all humour vanished the moment Lana staddled Imogen, jaw dropping and red solo cup contorting in his tight grip the moment Lana slipped Imogen's finger into her mouth. "Christ. I have to go to church." He blurted out, placing the cup in between his legs and bursting into applause. "Phenom. An excellent show."

magnolia: "Oh my god," Maggie said in the slow drawl of the guy from the "and they were roommates" vine. She burst into laughter. "It's Jason Fucking Bourne! Look at her move. God I don't think anyone can top that."

blake: Blake was shocked by the turn of events, eyes wide as he watched with fake lack of interest. Staying silent as Blake had no desire to actually take a turn, he watched as Lana left with an insult. "Fuck... Man down," he mumbled under his breath.

lana: "Thank you," Lana nodded solemnly, imitating a small curtsy before she flopped back into the space besides Gabe once more. "I was thinking of Nigel the whole time. Thornberry, that is."

imogen: Sitting completely still, Imogen watched with amusement as Lana put on a show for her. "Fuck, there's no un-creepy way to receive a lap dance" she finally muttered, going along with the finger sucking and forehead kissing, bursting into a loud applause when she was finished.

teddy: "Nigel Thornberry? A hunk, to say the least." Teddy stated, sitting up slightly straighter and flashing Lana a thumbs up after she sat down. "Alright, sluts, my turn! Dare me."

gabe: Gabe clapped a thunder of applause. "Your best work, Jameson!" he called out. "Someone do a dare for me. I thought my face would be in a cake by now."

teddy: Taking the last gulp from his cup, Teddy threw the empty plastic at Gabe's head, pointing an accusing finger. "Wait your turn, cretin! We don't have to conform to society's ways because it's your birthday!"

lana: Letting out an unearthly shriek as the cup rebounded and landed on Lana's lap, she picked at it like you might a soggy piece of food while washing the dishes. "Abomination! Teddy is disqualified on grounds of treason."

teddy: "What?! No! You're all in cahoots! Gimme my cup back, I wanna toss it at someone else now."

magnolia: "Boo!" Magnolia shouted at Teddy, throwing one of her collection of red cups at the boy.

jude: "I," Jude started out of nowhere, having been stuck in silence for the past minute or so -- apparently he needed a moment to compose after witnessing Imogen's finger getting sucked. "I say... Gabe kisses someone. Some-ONES, actually. Plural. A threeway kiss."

imogen: "I didn't think college kids were all actually this horny, you guys know about the internet, right?" the brunette asked, sipping at the drink she was holding.

magnolia: "Blake, I'm terrified. Hold me. I feel as if I'm about to witness the Dan, Vanessa, Olivia threeway all over again," Maggie said nervously, chewing on one of her nails as she grasped at his hand dramatically.

jude: Jude whipped around to look at Imogen like she'd just harshly backhanded him. "Wow... tell us how you really feel, Imogen. Thottimus Prime. I want my friendship bracelet back."

gabe: "Let the games begin," he sighed, looking to his right. Lana was staring at him with big eyes, and he was too inebriated to make good judgement on the repercussions of what would happen if his lips met hers. Itching his way to kneel between Lana and Teddy, he pushed their heads together like a sandwich so their cheeks touched and inched towards the two of them. Meeting his mouth with Lana's, and then Teddy's, the three were in sync as if they were one entity as the rest of the room cheered them on.

blake: Blake was already drunk enough to give into any inhibitions, a laugh escaping him following Magnolia's words. Tugging her closer to him, he made a space for her between the arm of the couch and his lap, barely large enough to fit her but it worked in the moment. "Truth or dare is uncomfortable," he mumbled, vodka-scented breath brushing against the back of her neck.

imogen: "I'm just saying, if you want to kiss someone you should just kiss them- who needs a game to make a move" Imogen muttered towards Jude, before looking at the trio with a smile on her face. "Like Gabe."

lana: Expression painted like a kid on Christmas morning when Gabe glanced her way, Lana abandoned her absentminded fiddling with the crumpled cup on her lap completely. Fingers creeping up to hook inside the neckline of Gabe's shirt, she bundled the fabric up inside an earnest fist as she pressed a kiss to his lips, lingering there perhaps far longer than necessary before drawing back and only remembering last minute to give Teddy a quick one, too. Drawing back after, she thumbed at the corner of her lips with a sheepish smile. "Wrow! Spicy. I need a refill."

magnolia: "I'm terrified," she mumbled back, throwing her legs up over his lab and she scooted down into the small space on the couch. She normally wouldn't have been as brazen as this, but the shots were catching up with her. "Oh my god, I think she swallowed him! He's GAN!"

teddy: Bursting into laughter when Gabe smushed his face into Lana's, Teddy's laughter quickly died when he watched the two of them kiss. Jealousy beginning to eat at his stomach and turn it into a pit, Teddy barely reciprocated when both Gabe and Lana gave him a quick kiss after, awkwardly twiddling his thumbs. "Yeah, Maggie, we get it." He mumbled, standing up quickly. "Shots? I want shots. I need more alcohol. Someone come with me. Blake. Come with me."

blake: "Oh boy," was mumbled under Blake's breath, unsure if his legs would even work anymore. "I'll be... right back," he assured Maggie, lifting himself up from underneath her and following behind Teddy toward the drinks. "Teddy, it's just a game. Don't get worked up. Everyone's fucking...wasted." He almost started laughing, but thought better of it.

jude: "Hungy harna hingini dana squashed banana," Jude crooned out the infamous tree shaking Vine in an attempt to diffuse the tension, sucking on his joint quickly before he threw Teddy a concerned glance. Whipping out his phone, the most comforting thing he could think to do in a moment like this was send him a lone kissing emoji via text.

gabe: Watching Blake and Teddy slip away from the rest of them, Gabe peered over to Lana with a look of questioning. "Fuck. What?" he mouthed at her, nodding towards Teddy's back getting farther away from them.

jude: "Fuck!" he suddenly exclaimed, grasping at his chest. Quickly sending Teddy another text, he wrote: "bad choice. that was my lips on you. oh this sounds like a sext. sorry. love u" and locked his phone with a sigh.

lana: Eyeing Teddy as he hastily retreated, Lana shrank back against the sofa like a wilting flower. "God. Ground control to major Tom..." she trailed off into solemn silence, sheepishly trading a glance at Gabe before shrugging slightly. "I, um... don't know. It's fine," she lied with a soft nod, gnawing at her bottom lip after. "He probably just needs... a shit."

teddy: Pressing his lips together as Blake attempted to calm him down, Teddy scoffed, biting his lip and nodding. "Yeah. True. A real Enlarged Emotion there." He mumbled, opening up a vodka of tequila and moving to pour some into the new cup Maggie had given him before deciding the better of it and just taking a shot right from the bottle. "Jesus Christ," Teddy spat, checking his phone as it continued to vibrate again his leg before narrowing his eyes at his phone then up at Jude. "Thank you, Jude. Fucking weirdo." He called to the other from the kitchen.

gabe / venus: "Welp, the drama queen has gone to shit himself," Venus sighed, downing the rest of her wine. "Y'all were a thing, I take it?" She sat up properly. "Do me, next! I'll break the streak. Challenge me and my pathological lies."

chloe: Chloe winced at the palpable tension in the room and made eye contact with Lana from across the room, putting 2 and 2 together. Raising her eyebrows, she took another sip of her drink. "Yikes."

blake: "Ah man," Blake said, running his hands over his face as he clumsily poured himself another drink. Alcohol didn't mix well with his medication, making him rather uncoordinated. "Gabe is... not a threat to you and Lana, if that's what you're worried about. He's... they're not on the same like -- fuck... what was I even saying? Goddamn it."

lana: Placing a hand over her eyes like Lady Gaga pulling her hat down to evade the paparazzi, Lana sighed loudly enough to draw the attention of anyone within a five mile radius. "Listen. I'm a big, raging whore. Now let's move swiftly on."

magnolia: "Everybody please look away, there's nothing to see here," Maggie echoed, latching onto the celebrity bit, putting her cowboy hat on Lana's head. "No further comments, blease."

jude: Smiling to himself as if his work was done, Jude patted his phone as he slid it into his pocket, nodding soulfully before he sucked on his joint again. "Who's next? Oh, wait. Uh... Venus? You pick dare?"

venus: "Whatever, was gonna break the streak but I'd assume you'd find a loophole to get me to strip anyway," Venus yawned. "Dare. Hit me with your best."

teddy: "It's fine." Teddy said, sounding distinctly Not Fine. "It's cool. Sorry for dragging you away. Let's just..." Without saying anything else, Teddy swiftly moved back into the living room, plastering a giant smile onto his face as if that would convince everyone that he hadn't just had a toddler like temper tantrum. Sitting beside Jude, he plucked his friends joint out of his grasp and took a long pull, nudging him with his elbow. "Jude next time you hit me with an accidental sext can't you at least make it a bit more obvious?" He asked, giving the other a weary smile.

imogen: Finding a spot besides Teddy, Imogen rested her head on his shoulder, tucking her hand under his bicep. "If a thot's heart breaks and no ones around to hear it, then it doesn't really break or something helpful" she muttered to the other, in an effort to make Teddy feel somewhat comforted.

jude: Instantly narrowing her eyes after tugging her hands down, Lana flung her hand out in childish impulse, swatting at the edge of Imogen's thigh without thinking about it. "Oh! God... Um. Nasty... bug!" she added in a stammer, dusting at the area after before casually leaning back against Gabe's shoulder. "There was... a bug."

magnolia: "Wait, shit, is it the New Year yet?" Maggie asked to know one in particular.

teddy: Grinning at Imogen, Teddy rolled his eyes fondly as she jokingly tried to make him feel better, leaning over and kissing her on the top of her head. "Me? Heartbroken? Never. You've got me confused with an emotional thot, Immy!" Teddy proclaimed. Glancing over when Lana smacked at Imogen's thigh, he raised a questioning eyebrow at her excuse, "Really? I didn't see anything. Did you?" He mumbled bluntly, turning back to Imogen.

gabe: "There's a bug on me now," Gabe whispered at Lana, who was already leaning on him again. "Yes! My balls are dropping. I'm 21 now, after all. Time to count down, everyone!"

lana: "It was a beetle, if you must know. A muscly one with a dimple chin like John Travolta," Lana mumbled halfheartedly, eyebrows knitting slightly before she straightened in her place at the arrival of the countdown, throwing Gabe's hand mid air like an Olympic victor. "He's finally a man!"

imogen: Spitefully glaring over at Lana, Imogen waited for the countdown before leaning closer towards Teddy's lips, her hand resting on the side of his face as she pulled him in for a lingering kiss. Pulling away she gave the boy a playful smirk as her hand continued to caress his face. "New Years resolution is going to be to ask for permission before I kiss people, sorry"

venus: "THE BALL IS DROPPING!" Venus pulled Jude in for another kiss as the countdown went to zero on the television. Pulling away, her jaw dropped at the sight of Teddy and Imogen as she took in the sheer chaos of it all. "We've just been nuked, folks!"

jude: Dramatically pulling her over his lap like he was bowing her mid ballroom waltz, Jude cradled her head afterwards like you might a newborn baby, pad of his index crossing down her forehead like a holy blessing after. "Holy father, hallowed by thy name... Please exorcise the demons from this thot."

teddy: Blinking in confusion at Lana's description of the so called beetle on Imogen's leg, Teddy didn't even have a moment to realize Imogen was going to kiss him until the very moment it happened. Hardly thinking twice about it, he kissed Imogen back, grin on his face when she pulled back. "No one actually follows resolution's anyway." He pointed out, laughing slightly at the scenario, before leaning in and pressing another, more chaste kiss to her lips. "HAPPY NEW YEARS THOTS!"

venus: "Well, considering all the tension in the room right now," Venus offered. "How about we ring in 2018 with a Wet Hot American Orgy? Then no one's angry with each other!"

lana: Jaw hanging open all the way down to her knees, Lana straightened to press a quick kiss against Gabe's cheek for the sake of leaving him a parting birthday wish, quickly mumbled "Catch you later!" in his ear seeing her straighten to her feet after and storm off without a glance Teddy's way.

imogen: Imogen pushed herself off the couch and brushed off her pants, speaking a quick "Happy New Years. No Ragrets" to her peers before waltzing toward the door and exiting the party house.

[borisbubbles]

1. BELGIUM

Blanche - “City Lights” 4th place

And so it ends... it only took me TWO MONTHS good lord.

I’m not going to beat around the bush here. The choice to put Blanche at the top of this ranking was easy. There hasn’t been a contestant in a WHILE whose journey I’ve been THIS invested in. (the last time was Tinkara in 2014; ESC rewarding her with a spot in the finale on my BIRTHDAY was the best bday gift I ever received ;__;).

I suppose there *IS* the universal (and not entirely unfounded) criticism that Blanche played a lesser version of the Aminata game and... I don’t remember if i’ve mentioned it before, but I really fucking love Aminata? Even a “watered-down Love Injected” is EASILY the best entry of the year for me, #SorryNotSorry. (though she’s more like Lisa Miskovsky i m o)

There are several things which attract me to Blanche. The Staging, for instance. Sure, it *could* have been better. Did It need to be better? Nah. We were always getting this top four, in that particular order, so it’s fine. The backdrop and lighting were spot on and provided the dynamism it needed. It also features my personal favourite visual effect: Floortile Sorcery:

Mesmerising

I also really love Blanche as a hume. I have a soft spot for the Bèta Introverted Band Geek type of contestant because they feel so disarmingly out-of-place (cf.: Salvador and JOWST, but also past contestants like Tinkara Kovac, Jónsi or Aud Wilken). Blanche shines not in spite her inate lack of star power but because of it. She’s relatable and real. She remains *herself* and in doing so, endeared an entire continent. In other words, she is everything Salvador fans claim Salvador is.

So, about ~That Journey~ or as I would like to call it:

The PASSION OF THE BLANCHE

Blanche is often compared to a wallflower, a lamb, a deer-in-the-headlights, bland, dead-eyed, emotionless and sombre. I would agree had I not rewatched.

On rewatch it became clear to me that Blance was, in fact, arguably the most passionate out of everyone, albeit not within the usual meaning of “intense emotion”, but in the ancient Biblical sense of “experiencing an extensive period of intense suffering”. <3

Naturally, this upset the Value Seeker part of the community who were DEMANDING a Fierceness Injection, but lol I mean Blanche isn’t Aminata and she never will be, deal? She is an introverted, camera-shy schoolgoer who spent most of her interview time looking at her feet  or tripping over the English Language (btw: best Frenglish ever? Yes, defo) If she had tried to pull off “fierce” she’d have failed and flopped and been OUT in the semifinal.

Instead, the Belgian delegation did the most clever thing they ever could have done. They profiled Blanche as vulnerable, desperate, afraid to lose her lover and it worked. The Key change at the end is sublime, symbolizing the BREAK OUT from her icy shell, as she feels her romance slipping through her fingers. Do we *know* the panic, the desperation, the guilt which sets in when such a thing happens? Blance portrayed that perfectly and I was feeling it. So, I’m not bothered that she looks “terrified”; It’s part of her act, you ghouls. Do you think THIS is the face of a scarity-cat shrew?

What I see is a focused young woman who knows precisely what she’s doing. (although the hand gestures are still awks lol but you can’t have everything)

But the Martyrdom of Blanche Christ wasn’t just self-inflicted. She also pulled us, the diehards (you’re still reading about Eurovision in JULY. don’t deny it.) into the ordeal from the second “City Lights” was revealed, which is an extraordinary feat.

You see, there has been a distinct pattern among the Fourth Placers ever since 2013. They always, ALWAYS start out as universally beloved top contenders for their modernized, edgy, too-good-for-Eurovision songs. Then, they have underwhelming rehearsals in which their ratings plummet only to get it together and finish in the top four anyway. Blanche’s journey is precisely that, except she took it to dizzying extremes.

From the moment of the song reveal, the netizen fan community (myself included) took a huge interest in her. No surprise, considering the song is the best (like, it was the fave among pretty much ALL of her fellow competitors. slayage <3), her voice is exceptional and she’s from Top Tier Eurovision Nation Belgium (lmfao @ this being a statement I can type w/o any irony. Well I’d never!).

Naturally, as is bound to happen with pre-show faves, she was the locus of many netizen meltdowns over the course of the pre-show.

From #BadVoiceGate to #WhiteDressGate, #EmptyStagingGate and #ScaredLambGate, Blanche unwittingly fed our collective anxiety and paranoia, taking us for an emotional rollercoaster ride. The Blanche Experience was like watching a psychological drama unfold before our very eyes, with setback after setback after setback gutpunching us towards Bergendahlland until our Heroine, FINALLY, prevailed against all odds and finished in the top anyway. I don’t know about you, but for me, it was a catharsis. Everyone else’s journey pales in comparison to this epic saga of personal growth, intimacy and downright good music. 

In short,

FENK YOO EVRIWAN AL EUV YOORUP MERCI

Decade Rank: 17/324

lol even with that she’s still my lowest ranked #1 for the decade. oh well.

and that concludes my ranking!!!! (just in time because I’m embarking on a three week vacay on Wednesday). I hope you enjoyed it and see you next season for more EUROVISION!! (I may still post from time to time but that will likely be RTV or lit-related)

THE EUROVISION 2017 RANKING:

-ADORE- 1. Belgium (17/324) 2. Belarus (22/324) 3. Macedonia (28/324) 4. Norway (29/324) 5. Lithuania (43/324) 6. Hungary (47/324) -LOVE- 7. Moldova (55/324) 8. Italy (61/324) 9. the Netherlands (63/324) 10. United Kingdom (67/324) 11. Finland (68/324) 12. Estonia (71/324) 13. Azerbaijan (84/324) 14. Latvia (87/324) 15. Israel (93/324)

-LIKE- 16. Bulgaria (100/324) 17. Portugal (105/324) 18. Croatia (115/324) 19. Austria (119/324) 20. France (138/324) 21. Poland (154/324) 22. Armenia (158/324) 23. Romania (164/324)

-OKAY- 24. Iceland (174/324) 25. Ukraine (190/324) 26. San Marino (203/324) 27. Albania (217/324) 28. Denmark (228/324) 29. Spain (237/324) 30. Cyprus (240/324) -DISLIKE- 31. Germany (258/324) 32. Montenegro (263/324) 33. Sweden (270/324) 34. Serbia (275/324) 35. Australia (280/324) 36. Switzerland (286/324) 37. Czech Republic (288/324) 38. Malta (291/324) -HATE- 39. Georgia (301/324) 40. Greece (303/324) 41. Slovenia (307/324) 42. Ireland (312/324)

THE BORISBUBBLES HALL OF ESC FAVES:

1972: the Netherlands (Sandra & Andres - “Als het om de liefde gaat”) 1973: United Kingdom (Cliff Richard - “Power to all our friends”) 1974: Sweden (ABBA - “Waterloo”) 1975: Germany (Joy Fleming - “Ein Lied kann eine Brücke sein”) 1976: Luxembourg (Jürgen Marcus - “Chansons pour ceux qui s’aiment”) 1977: Belgium (Dream Express - “A Million in 1-2-3″) 1978: Israel - (Izhar Cohen & Alfabeta - “A Ba Ni Bi” 1979: Germany (Dschinghis Khan - “Dschinghis Khan”) 1980: Luxembourg (Sofie & Magaly - “Papa Pingouïn”) 1981: Belgium (Emly Starr - “Samson”) 1982: Germany (Nicole - “Ein Bißchen Frieden”) 1983: Israel (Ofra Haza - “Chai”) 1984: Ireland (Linda Martin - “Terminal 3″) 1985: Finland (Sonja Lumme - “Eläköön Elämä”) 1986: Belgium (Sandra Kim - “J’aime la vie”) 1987: Belgium (Liliane Saint-Pierre - “Soldiers of love”) 1988: Switzerland (Céline Dion - “Ne partez pas sans moi”) 1989: Turkey (Pan - “Bana Bana”) 1990: Yugoslavia (Tajci - “Hajde, da ludujemo”) 1991: Sweden (Carola - “Fångad av en stormvind”) 1992: Denmark (Lotte Nilson & Kenny Lübke - “Alt det som ingen ser”) 1993: the Netherlands (Ruth Jacott - “Vrede”) 1994: Germany (MeKaDo - “Wir geben ‘ne Party”) 1995: Cyprus (Alexandros Panayi - “Sti fotia”) 1996: Croatia (Maja Blagdan - “Sveta Ljubav”) 1997: Poland (Anne-Marie Jopek - “Ale jestem”) 1998: the Netherlands (Edsilia Rombley - “Hemel en aarde”) 1999: Croatia (Doris Dragovic - “Marija Magdalena”) 2000: Latvia (Brainstorm - “My star”) 2001: France (Natasha St. Pier - “Je n’ai que mon âme”) 2002: Spain (Rosa - “Europe’s living a celebration”) 2003: Germany (Lou - Let’s get happy”) 2004: Albania (Anjeza Shahini - “Image of you”) 2005: Romania (Luminita Anghel & Sistem - “Let me try”) 2006: Iceland (Silvia Night - “Congratulations”) 2007: Georgia (Sopho - Visionary Dream”) 2008: Iceland (Euroband - “This is my life”) 2009: Iceland (Yohanna - “Is it true?”) 2010: Albania (Juliana Pasha - “It’s all about you”) 2011: Germany (Lena - “Taken by a stranger”) 2012: Sweden (Loreen - “Euphoria”) 2013: Greece (Koza Mostra ft. Agathonas Iakovidis - “Alcohol is free”) 2014: Slovenia (Tinkara Kovac - “Round and round”) 2015: Latvia (Aminata - “Love Injected”) 2016: Armenia (Iveta Mukuchyan - “LoveWave”) 2017: Belgium (Blanche - “City Lights”)

[djavoll]

have some trashy, post-midnight sprint, self-indulgent intro to the hybrid universe i hope to actually write and publish one day. (unedited unbetad etc etc u know the drill)

pairing: pre-yoonkook + established vmin (vague hints at vminkook and taegi bc that’s how i roll)

rating: pg-13

length: 1.4k

summary: jungkook turns 21. his surprise party is less ‘here’s a stripper!’ and more ‘we adopted a cat hybrid under your name. happy bday bro!’

Jungkook expected a lot of things out of his twenty-first birthday. He expected to get so shit-faced drunk that he might have to visit the hospital for a quick, casual, run-of-the-mill stomach pump. He expected a sloppy blow job from an eager friend. He expected a customized cake of a favourite video game. He expected to magically turn cool and confident and mature and totally look like A Man the way Jimin and Taehyung already do, and no, he's not jealous. A lot of people say his baby face is a charming point, actually. Lots of them. So he expected a lot from his birthday, yes, but you only turn twenty-one once in your life. From thereon it's all downhill; a mess of living up to your childhood expectations, getting an Adult Job, doing adult things which involve not being the world's brattiest younger sibling. He's not really prepared for all that. Twenty-one on the dot is perfect as is. He expects twenty-one to be his lucky year. Funny thing about expectations, though, is that they're rarely ever met. Jungkook walks away from his birthday celebration free of poisoning of any sort (yawn), only reasonably high from the nug Hoseok brought to the party, and holding the official documents for the adoption of one human-feline hybrid named Min Yoongi. But let's backtrack a bit. All of it, like all the bad ideas Jungkook gets dragged into, starts with Jimin and Taehyung. Jimin and Taehyung, god bless their beautiful, perverted hearts, have been pioneering human-hybrid companionship in their little circle of friends for a few years by now. It all started rather simply: Taehyung was deemed unsuitable for the market (read: for sale) due to a number of health reasons and his undesirable lack of post-human genes. He ended up being let go of the corporation (read: kicked out), forced to make a living on his own, and ended up on the steps of the Park family restaurant weeping, begging on his bare knees to be granted a job. Anything. Even as a dishwasher. He had worked there for a total of six months when Jimin came over for a visit from university and after one glance, fell deeply in love. Took him back to his apartment in the city. Introduced him to all his friends. Signed him up for online classes. (Became his best friend and boyfriend for years to come). It was a lot to take in at first, but neither of them have been shocked by the presence of hybrids for many years now. Taehyung fit right in, standing among them as an equal in all terms. A friend, a boyfriend, a brother. Jungkook could handle that. Jungkook can handle a lot. He definitely can handle a hybrid. "Jimin, I can't handle a hybrid." "Yes, you can! I know you can," Jimin groans again, throwing his head back on Taehyung's shoulder, on whom he's seated. "You're Tae's friend, too. You practically live at our place. You can totally do this." "Yeah, Kook, seriously. What are you so scared of?" Taehyung asks, voice muffled against Jimin's neck. Nuzzling gently, as if to leave his scent behind. "I don't know, man. This is a lot to dump on someone without their prior agreement." Jungkook whines and whines, clutching the official document in is hand like he can't believe it's real. That this is really, actually happening. "I don't even know anything about this hybrid." Namjoon wolf-whistles from where he's laid on the couch, face down, drooling steadily into the pillows. "Dude, so hot. Such a babe. Eleven out of ten." Taehyung tosses a flip-flop on his head, "shut up, that's not the intro he needs." Namjoon goes to toss it back, but witnessing Jimin's menacing glare, he reluctantly puts his hand back down. Closes his eyes again. Continues drooling. "His name is Min Yoongi, he's twenty-five years old, a feline hybrid like Taetae," Jimin lists off his fingers, face scrunched up, "oh! and he's also from Daegu. Tae has met him before, at event briefings way back. Tell him about it, babe." Perking up from a light scratch behind his ears, Taehyung smiles encouragingly. "Yep, I know Yoongi from a long time ago. We just mostly reunited in glances when Jimbles and I were going through the adoption process, so I haven't really spoken to him in years, but," he sighs, fond, "Kook, he's so cute. If I get mistaken for a canine hybrid a lot, then Yoongi is a fucking teacup kitten. I love him." "Show us some photos, maybe?" Hoseok plops his chin on Taehyung's knee, wriggling his brows. "Ooh, I have something!" Jimin chirps, pulling out his phone. He scrolls through his photo album manically, the sound of his thumb tapping the screen loud in the quiet room, face contorted in concentration. Taehyung stares over his shoulder ready to tell him when. "Ah! There it is!" Then he's leaning down to show it to Hoseok, who 'oooh's loudly and lewdly, captivated by the screen, apparently watching a video. "That's kinda hot, I'm not gonna lie." "What is it? What are you showing him?" Jungkook's never been good at controlling his impulses, even when it comes to feigning nonchalance. He's always been a bit of a hedonist. "I wanna see. Let me see." he babbles as he trudges his way to the front couch, tripping over blankets and pillows, then snatches the phone away. He ignores the plights of protest in his wake and presses play, wide eyes and lower lip bitten. A split second later all he has is regret. "Oh, fuck." he mumbles. "Fuck, yeah." Hoseok echoes. So, the video. He expected it to be a lot of things. A cute video of him smiling. Yoongi man wearing something revealing. Lots of expectations. Funny thing about expectations. The video loops and once again he's met with the image of Jimin and Taehyung's bed - unmade and soft in the afternoon light - and on it Taehyung making out sloppily with a much smaller, paler man. And oh, boy, is it hot. Ghost pepper hot. 'I-will-not-lose-a-noodle-challenge' Jeon Jungkook level of hot. "Oh, fuck." "You already said that." someone chortles. Jungkook pays it no mind and lets the video play again. The man - Yoongi, his name is Yoongi - is sat forward facing Taehyung with just his knees resting on top of Taehyung's thighs. His shoulders are fairly broad but he's otherwise small, fucking tiny, in a simple black tee and ripped jeans, and oh my god-- the softest mop of black hair and little black ears. He's a dream come true. He's Jungkook biggest fucking fantasy in the flesh. He's perfect. Jungkook had popped his fair amount of boners over Taehyung (Jimin and him are unaware of things such as boundaries or privacy), so he doesn't really mind his presence. Quite the contrary, the contrast is really something else. Taehyung's golden tan skin, plush red lips against the pale pink of Yoongi's smaller, poutier mouth. It's poetry in motion. Yoongi's jawline is sharp and he moves so leisurely against Taehyung, with all the practiced ease in the world, like he was born to suck faces. He makes wet, smacking noises whenever he pulls in and out of the kiss, and Jungkook is fucked. He's fucked even more when just a hint of a small, red tongue peeks out from between his and Taehyung's mouth. God, he wonders if it tastes as good as it looks. He's three seconds into his tenth replay when the phone is yanked out of his hands. "Alright, that's enough perving over my boyfriend. We can talk more about this tomorrow." Jimin waves him off, much to Taehyung's amusement. That goddamn bastard. He knows exactly what he does to him. "Let's all go to sleep." Namjoon and Seokjin are deep in slumber when Hoseok announces, begrudgingly, that it is indeed late. Half past five in the morning, in fact. Jungkook goes to sleep with an awkward, overly-excited boner, thinking of all the possible ways he can fuck this Yoongi dude sideways once he gets to his place. Happy fucking birthday to him. (Spoiler alert: as all predictions done by one Jeon Jungkook, this one fails, too. Turns out Yoongi's dick game is just as good as his bubble butt and cute tongue. Jungkook learns to bend over any way he wishes.)

[bubba4576]

the latest

i don’t know how to start, so i’ll just jump right in...

lindley is away at college!  that girl that changed my life forever now has the audacity to leave me.  :)   i’m so happy for her though.  and we MISS her!  but she’s loving it and that makes it all ok.  purdue was a good choice for her - she knew it, but i remained unconvinced.  it’s huge and kind of scary.  but she is thriving there.  she’s found friends, gotten involved with young life and will soon be serving a local middle school in ministry.  classes are going well, she’s working hard.  it was hard at first, mostly because of trying to connect with ryan - different places, experiences and distractions, but they’ve figured it out.  I wouldn’t have been surprised if they felt it wasn’t worth the work or stress, but they're plugging away, working on compromising etc.  

Her last 6 months at home were A LOT.  so much emotional stress for me (which is mostly gone now that she is settled).  SO many big decisions (college), SO many exciting things going on at school (homecoming queen & ryan was king (awwwww), the beginning of their relationship, student council work that went right up to the end of the year, graduation and party!). These things are always harder with the oldest and I’ll be wiser when it’s Mal’s turn.  but it was also FUN!  so many things to celebrate.  she’s a lovely girl who loves Jesus and wants to serve Him.  she’s kind and fun and generous and loving.  she’s also coming home soon for thanksgiving and it will be wonderful to all be under one roof.  we miss her.  did i say that?

and, along the lines of being lovely, there is Mallory.  she’s in high school now and really, truly is lovely.  she’s smart, she’s driven, she’s talented, she is the whole package.  but she also hasn't always cared what people thought about her.  that can be freeing, but it can also produce someone who is unkind. there is something to being interested in how you are perceived so that you can love better.  Jesus didn’t command us to  take over the world!  be the boss!  be the best at everything you put your hand to!  no, he commands us to love.  love looks different with every personality, but there is a commonality of humility and softness that is critical.  as mal has grown it is evident that in addition to all of her many gifts and talents, the Lord is blessing her with a soft and kind heart.  last year, she even won an award at school for it.  it was actually an all around awesome award.  it was for the one person in the middle school who excelled in all areas - academically and spiritually.  wow.  that is absolutely amazing.  ok, girl, go conquer the world, as long as you are kind when you do it.  

she’s loving high school - she was ready for the academic rigor and for the boys to not be so annoying - the second part hasn't come to fruition yet, but she’s loving everything else.  soccer was great, and she was a huge contributing factor to her team’s success.  she tried out for and was accepted into the fort wayne philharmonic youth orchestra.  that has been a huge challenge and joy for her.  she loves her clarinet (and other instruments too right now- she's messing around and teaching herself the trombone, flute, piano and guitar).  she’s even thought about being a band director!  we’ll see.  i think the sky will be the limit for her once college comes around.  right now she’s taking tennis lessons and is the president of her class student council.  the girl is nonstop.

now on to james.  and i’ll cry as i type this because these last months for him have been hard.  starting last spring semester, he had been complaining a lot about his tummy hurting.  he would even miss school because of this mystery tummy issue.  i assumed it was linked to his lifelong battle with constipation, but it just seemed excessive.  i considered taking him off dairy or gluten, but the symptoms weren’t consistent enough to suggest food issues, so we just enjoyed the times when he was fine and were frustrated when he wasn't.  fast forward to this summer. he started out the swim season great, but was struggling because he wasn’t as fast as he thought he should be.  he even got displaced from his relay team by his good friend tyler drouin who has just started swimming this summer.  that was so hard for him - a character developing time (it’s not about you, it’s about your team...you won’t always be the fastest...blah blah blah) for sure.  we noticed it too, but he had moved up an age group - going from being the oldest in the bracket to the youngest is tough.  and we didn’t want to be delusional and think the same way - why is my kid no longer a superstar??? so we rode it out with him and celebrated each faster time, even thought it was never fast enough for him.  and then there was the peeing.  he literally peed all the time.  it got to be a joke in our house - where’s james?  oh, probably in the bathroom!  i wasn’t paying attention to exactly how often, which i could kick myself for now.  but we took a quick trip to cleveland to drop zach off after him spending the week here and on the way home it was ridiculous how often he needed to stop to pee.  that was the first time i really noticed how frequent it was.  at this point we just thought maybe it was a UTI or something and would ask if it burned to pee or anything.  nope.  finally at the end of the month, we were with our small group at pokagen and planned to talk to cari foss about it.  the kids were all swimming so she saw him in his suit with his shirt off and made a comment about his weight, which reminded us to ask about the peeing.  oh boy that sent us on a journey.  cari was concerned.  we knew he looked skinny but hadn’t weighed him in a while so i just thought he was probably getting taller.  he even said to me, mom i think i’m shrinking!  i blew it off and told him kids don’t shrink!  haha.  well. not funny at all, cari strongly encouraged us to get him to the pediatrician, so we did on july 31, just 10 days after his 10th bday.  it was confirmed by a urine analysis and a blood test that he has type 1 diabetes.  uggggggggg........and tears. sooooooo many tears.  my poor baby.  feeling so badly for so long and we had no idea.  it just breaks my heart to think about that.  so our life has changed and that day will forever be a marker - pre diabetes and post diabetes. 

even though it has rocked our world and the learning curve has been steep, it’s gone well.  no hospital stays, so scary lows that keep us up all night etc.  we count every carb, we do the math for the insulin, james pricks his fingers diligently multiple times a day.  we treat the highs and the lows like we are supposed to.  we try to keep him as stable as possible.  teena holloway, the school nurse has been fabulous as have cari and kimmy, as well as the team at the endocrinologist’s office.  i’m so thankful for the support.  

we just had our first routine appointment (he’ll have to go every three months for the rest of his life i understand) and his numbers were great!  his A1C started at 14 and is now at 5.5 (4-6 is normal!).  they were excited about how it is going.  we felt like we needed a medal or something - we didn’t FAIL!!!  we talk diabetes ALL THE TIME - i’m sure mallory is sick of it, but she knows all about it too and is so helpful.  unfortunately, james was diagnosed just two weeks before lindley went off to college so she isn’t as involved.  i’m hoping that when she comes back for christmas break she can learn more so she isn’t scared to be alone with him.  

for me the challenge now is to not borrow trouble from tomorrow.  it’s so easy to think of the future in terms of being terrified about how he will one day handle this on his own. as a parent, we have control now, for the most part, but as he grows, he’s going to have to take more responsibility and do it himself.  that will be hard to watch and let go.  but that is YEARS away.  so i’m trying my best to think of today, be thankful for today.  breathe, breathe...

so that’s us.  kevin and i are doing well as a diabetes care team i think.  i worry more than i should, but he gets it.  in the past, i’ve been weighed down by things that he doesn't understand.  now we both feel it.  we’re a little numb and a lot exhausted because of the hard parts of life and all of the changes that we’ve experienced lately.  the Lord has sustained us- given us strength for today and hope for tomorrow, but not strength for tomorrow.  we don’t need it til then.