#(x. seojoon threads)

[hamsterclaw]

Weighted (part 2)

Weighted, from Namjoon's point of view, for Sam @sahmfanficbts.

Part of the Love AU.

Pairing: Namjoon x afab reader

Genre: Exes Namjoon and reader, asshole Namjoon

Rating: 18+

Word count: 1.3k

Warnings: Sex, swearing, one mention of self-harm

Namjoon’s been thinking about you today, more so than usual. It’s funny to him how he never remembered your anniversary when you were actually married but how he never forgets it now that you’re divorced. 

He picks up his phone, scrolls through your message thread, smiles at your profile picture, the name he’s saved you under. 

You and him have never really used texts to communicate, in fact the last few texts have been the eggplant emoji (from him to you) and ‘come over’ (from you to him). A few pictures, a sexy video of you two fucking he watches more than he’d like to admit. 

His dick twitches with interest but Namjoon puts his phone down instead of hitting play. 

He should get ready, there’s a fuckton of stuff he’s been putting off but he doesn’t really want to do anything but see you. 

So that’s what he does. 

Pulls on those jeans you like because they don’t hide when he’s getting hard, Namjoon wonders idly if you realise he’s constantly half-hard when he’s with you. Puts on the chain around his neck you once took between your teeth when he was on top of you and it was dangling in your face. 

He shivers at the memory. 

He locks the door to his apartment, jogs down the steps, adjusts the cap he put on to hide that his hair’s a mess, makes no eye contact with his hot neighbour in gym clothes because Namjoon decided long ago that sex isn’t worth pursuing unless it comes with intimacy. 

He wonders if you’d call that ‘growth’ if he told you, decides you’d probably just snort in his face and think he was talking out of his ass. 

You’ve never seen him as anything but the fuckboi you met at university but even fuckbois grow up. 

He’s close to your apartment now, debates picking up coffee for the both of you but decides he’ll just take you to breakfast instead. Wonders if you’re in, if you’re alone, if that dude Seojoon you’ve been dating on and off might be around. 

Decides he doesn’t give a fuck, if you’re not in he’ll turn around and go back home, it wouldn’t be the first time he’s missed you. 

There’s no answer when he buzzes, but he knows you, knows you’re rarely out by this time unless you have to go to work, so he heads up anyway. 

Turns his key in the lock, stops at the threshold of  your doorway, tosses his keys into the dish you always tried to get him to use when you lived together. 

Takes two steps in, sees a duvet covered, you-shaped lump sitting on your window seat, realises it’s one of those days. 

There’s a leap in his chest because he thinks this means that what you had still matters to you. You don’t mourn things you never treasured, do you? 

Namjoon doesn’t pick apart his feelings, just takes it back to that you’re hurting just like he is. 

He sighs, pats over the duvet where your head should be. 

If nothing else, he knows how to push your buttons. 

‘Did you slit your wrists under there?’ he asks. ‘Take any pills?’ 

He stifles a smile as you pop out from under the sea of ivory, eyes flashing, brow furrowed, lips twisted, snapping some comeback at him he doesn’t even hear because he’s just relieved to see you’re ok. 

‘Wanna fuck?’ he asks, hoping you’ll come even further out of the duvet. 

Your response is to glare at him balefully but to be honest, Namjoon prefers when you’re angry to when you’re sad. 

You rarely ever cry but when you do it makes him want to cry too. Has made him cry too. 

When you cry it opens the door to some deeply-buried well of emotions in him, mainly sadness. Regret about how he fucked things up so badly between you. Not that you’re without fault, it takes two, he knows this. 

Namjoon sighs again, he can’t unpick this right now, so he takes it back to that you’re hurting, just like he is. 

‘When did you last eat?’ he asks. 

You don’t bother to reply this time, so he heads to your kitchen. 

Tries not to think about why he knows where everything is even though you’re divorced now, and you haven’t lived together for more than a year. 

Fuck, what a mess you both have made. 

He fixes noodles for you both, puts in those vegetables you like even though he’s never seen the point of putting veg in ramen. Hesitates over the bowl you picked up in Tokyo on your honeymoon. He has the other of what was once a matching pair. 

Shit why’s he getting maudlin over a fucking bowl. 

He slams the pot down on the stove, harder than necessary, taking petty pleasure in the splash that he’s sure as fuck not cleaning up. 

Cracks two eggs, chooses two bowls at random, grabs cutlery. 

Sets everything down on your coffee table in the living room, ignores you as he eats. 

You still haven’t moved from your spot by the time he’s finished, so he picks up the second bowl, goes over to you. 

‘Open,’ he says. 

There’s a memory tugging at his brain, of you feeding him just like this once when he was recovering from stomach flu, making his gaze soften as he looks at you. 

You eat the whole damn bowl with minimal encouragement on his part, he’s too busy trying not to look at the way your tits fill out that flimsy sleep top you’ve got on. He clicks the TV on to distract himself, flicks through channels. 

Finally, you’re done, and Namjoon’s through with playing nursemaid. 

He wants to fill your cunt the way he just filled your stomach and if that makes him an asshole then so be it. 

Sex with you always makes him feel better when things are like this. 

‘Wanna take a shower, baby?’ he asks, gentle. 

He knows you’re going to say yes, he saw the way you glanced at his crotch, and if that wasn’t enough he can see how hard your nipples are through that top he’s two short steps from ripping off of you. 

Namjoon knows your naked body as well as his own at this point, knows the smell and taste of you, knows exactly how your body fits against his. He’s already half-hard when he pulls you into the shower, knows time and that spark in your eye will get him the rest of the way. 

You’re still, as he touches you, letting his hands slide over your warm skin, letting him look his fill. 

Goddamn, fuck, Namjoon thinks he’ll never get tired of touching you. 

He pulls you out, wraps a towel around you, nudges his dick against your ass as he plays with your tits. He’s a visual guy, and he’s always loved the contrast of your skin tones, how his arms look around you as he touches you. 

He slips his hand between your thighs but he already knows what he’ll find, that honeyed slickness that feels so good on his cock, on his fingers, in his mouth. 

He climbs on top of you, pulls you under him, shivers with delight at the familiarity of it. 

Namjoon’s never known how to show you everything that’s in his heart, so he takes it back to how you’re hurting, just like he is

He presses his face against yours, swallows past the lump in his throat. 

‘Happy anniversary, baby,’ he tells you. 

He can’t look at your face, it’s too much even now. 

He takes his comfort from you and gives what he can. Hopes it’s enough. 

Lays with you until he thinks you’re asleep, wipes the tears he hadn’t realised he’d shed. 

Waits for you to wake up so you can do it all over again. 

[glorianamultistan]

omg,, can i like, request park seojoon x male reader?? maybe something like some smut after a swimming session 😩 (because seojoon shirtless does unimaginable things to me, and it being forbidden would be so hot hhdhsgs)

love your writing!! keep up the good work omg

OMG! Thank you so much @flwrboi for requesting this. It took too much time, but I hope what I write will be worth it. Also, since you have not specified the reader's disposition, I am taking some liberty. This is obviously, a work of fiction, just presented in a different form.

Park Seojoon x Male Reader

I do not own the pic.

This letter was found in Seojoon's private room at the swimming club, it was not meant to be read by you but due to the request of many and the freedom of knowledge, here it is revealed, through some edits to conceal the names of the most immediate persons, you may form your opinions but remember that offense is allusive and envy is the real poison.

Hyung,

I never thought that I would be related, even if distantly, to you, and in the moments of our first random encounters as relatives, we both know how we tried to not let the past interfere with our present.

The first night in that hotel, when you took me to your room, a mere 19-year-old virgin, with an upcoming star, I felt the golds and whites rush through your skin into my body and all other marks and reliques you left on me; I preserved them till I was able to so without losing my sanity.

For months I felt the ghost of touches and bites on my whole body, you were there, on the screen, shinning brighter than ever and I lived on with the hauntings; nobody after you came close to make me live through those sensations again, they bit, spanked, kissed and put it in the same spots but all were just a parody.

Then, slowly, I recovered from the past and tried to focus on my current life; I had to finish my university degree, and watching you reach new heights assured me that the chance encounter was some cosmic justice done to me to balance out all the past misfortunes.

Yet, after two years of that, there you were again, with a blonde undercut, smiling, the perfect boyfriend of the perfect child of the family. Did you choose my cousin to come back to me? I know, I dream a lot.

I saw the disbalance in your eyes as I was introduced to you, but we had roles to play; we did well, for the most part of it. Two, three, four family gatherings, and the thread was thin, wafered ice, one hot breath away from the abysmal collapse.

And when you were asked to drop me off at my flat, you had to deny, you had to say no and I had to say that I am fine, and should've taken a cab.

I will mark that as the turn, the makeout in the car, the blowjob, the whole night at my flat; you kissed every time with such a fierce will to not let go that the whole next week my tongue felt rough, were you scared that it won't ever happen again? Is that why you wanted to fill me 'to the brim, everywhere'?

Then came the suggestion of swimming lessons, and the naive little cousin of mine, she thought you were a caring hyung to offer help to me.

Your manager arranged everything, and I could not be more thankful to anyone, booking the swimming club for the whole days we were there, covering up for us; for a moment I thought you were sleeping with him too to make him do this much for us, but some people genuinely want to see us happy.

There, in the pool, as you taught me how to swim, I always looked over at your body, glistening with water, and felt as if I were to touch you, you would flow away, like a mirage, but you always assured by quite smoothly going in me that you will be there, holding me, using me and keeping me with you.

You broke up with my cousin after your relationship was publicised and my whole family went against you. So I had no choice but to cut them out of my life to be with you, still, holding on to your promise of living together; I have waited for more than a year now.

Yesterday after we had our swimming session, and we had to drain out the pool as you insisted on doing it in the pool, I put this in your room before leaving, as a confession, though we have confessed many times before, and as a reminder to fulfill your promise too.

I will be meeting you next week now as you have to go abroad, so I hope you come back to me first before going to your place; I will wait while wearing your favourite apron.

love you,

M/L.

P.S.:- If you liked it, you can support me by buying me a coffee; link's on my page.

[nobilitylost]

@clairdclunc​ | starter call | seojoon & nox 

     At the start of his existence, SeoJoon prided himself on being worshipped by fishing villages along the coast. They would bring him tributes, treat him as a god, in return for good luck and good fortune when the men set out to sea. Occasionally, there were those who would mock him, belittle the fact that he was powerful, and the Dokkaebi would grant them the opposite – which meant that often times, those unfortunate souls never made it home. Whatever happened to them out there? He didn’t know and didn’t ask – though there were rumors of creatures just waiting to gobble up those that misfortune befell.

It wasn’t until he actually met one of those creatures that he believed all the stories. After all, what good of a historian and mythology expert would he be without devoting time to research and hunting down those that he heard whispers of…

“Are you staying warm, Nox?” Innocent question asked as he handed over a hot cup of soup that he’d bought from a café a few moments before. “It’s only supposed to get worse, so make sure you keep yourself wrapped up, okay?” Concern etched their way into his words as he took a seat on the abandoned park bench. “I thought maybe we could talk – about where you come from. What you do. I’m…keeping a book, passing along legends. We’re fading from minds and that’s disheartening. And besides…I might know where a few mermaids are if you’re willing to talk.”

[wistfulreality]

[!] warning list

i really liked the method that i saw someone else using on my dash so i am going to steal the brilliant idea from them. i have dropped everything that has not had a reply since the end of last year. with that said, i believe my rp thread tracker should be comprehensive of everything that i have replied to after the start of 2018. i will post the link to that in another list. however, now that i’ve finally had a chance to clean up my threads and such, the following threads are at risk of being dropped. the dates in the brackets are when they were last replied to. there’s no rush if you can’t get to it but you would still like to keep the thread please just hit the ❤️so i know that you’re still interested! this is also because a lot of times, i don’t see people’s dropped notices either so it’ll be good just for my own organization. i’ll reblog this a few times over the course of the next week. if the post is not ❤️’d by 3/15, then those plots will be considered dropped.

@cocacolx - minjun x hyerim ( 2/5 ) [ KEEPING ]

@troublcmakcr - jae x minjoo ( 1/29 ) ; mina x sangmin ( 2/12 )

@lilvcsxngs - hyemi x gabriel x kangho ( 2/8 ) [ DROPPED ]

@powerpuffs - hyunjin x chaeyoung ( 2/8 )

@rcdflavor - yeonah x sungho ( 2/9 )

@defjc - serri x jonah ( 2/10 ) [ KEEPING ]

@bodakyvllow - matt x harlowe ( 1/31 ) [ KEEPING ] ; sooyeon x jeremy ( 2/3 ) [ KEEPING ]; serri x hyuntae [ KEEPING ] ; semmi x joohyuk ( 2/11 ) [ DROPPED ]

@dvntgo - sungjoon x naya ( 2/10 ) ; misun x wooseok ( 2/10 )

@nalawritcs - jaehee x junseo ( 2/10 )

@suniish - adrian x areum ( 2/11 )

@like-y - chorong x daniel ( 2/11 )

@doht-a - jennie x jaehyun ( 2/13 )

@wiltingwinds - misun x jisung ( 2/15 ) ; seojoon x skylar ( 2/15 )

[nobilitylost]

@oleandercrowns​ | plotted-ish starter | seojoon & egan

     The book was full of dust, the smell permeating Seojoon’s small studio apartment. The language was old, cryptic, and taking him more time than he wanted to admit to decipher. It had been a rare find in a used bookstore, something the shop owner had no idea held so much value. The amount of money he paid for it was laughable, considering most museums would bend over backward to have it in their collection. But still, his attention wasn’t focused on the historical artifact stretched out across his table; it was wholly focused on the blonde on the sofa across from him.

They’d barely spoken in days, not since the fight over Hades and Egan’s place with him. Seojoon had learned long ago that discretion was the better part of valor; allowing his own anger to overwhelm him was counterproductive. But as the silence stretched on, he became antsier and antsier, wanting whatever ill will there was between them to end – while at the same time wanting to avoid another fight.

“I don’t regret what I said.” Finally, silence broken even though his voice remained soft – controlled – refusing to allow emotion to get the better of him. “It wasn’t your fault. And you’re right, I wasn’t there. I don’t know what happened, and I don’t know everything you went through.” He’d heard stories though, so many stories – enough that he understood why Egan would be so quick to anger over his treatment.

He shut the book, placing it strategically under the couch in case Egan got angry again. Seojoon could take a shove or two, but a book that old was priceless and fragile. Sighing deeply, he rubbed at his temples, hands sliding down his face in a gesture that spoke of sheer exhaustion. “I didn’t mean to upset you. I didn’t…it doesn’t matter. But you’re right. I don’t know anything about you, or well, anything more than what you’ll let me know. What I do know, though? Is that you’re a good man. I didn’t mean to bring back bad memories.”

Seojoon stood, neck rolling on his shoulders to release some of the tension he’d been holding since the fight. “I’m making tea. It’s cold. You should have some.”

[nobilitylost]

@trxnsmxgrify​ |  starter call | seojoon & ash

     “It’s beautiful.” Head nodded in the direction of the artwork on display, compliment rolling freely off his tongue. “You have some real talent; that’s rare these days.” In modern times, anyone could slap some color on a canvas and call it art. Back when Seojoon was first created the world didn’t operate that way; those with real talent were heralded by kings and queens, worshiped almost like gods. Now days? Those with real talent were relegated to sidewalk shows and begging for even the barest hint of attention. It was sad, in so many ways, and it was one of the things he hated most about modern times – the disparity among those who were so blatantly talented, and those who had the right connections that could get their so-called art into the spotlight.

“This should hang in a gallery. Listen, I work for the university; I have some connections. Can I make a phone call for you? I have friends that should see this.”

[nobilitylost]

between you and these bones | accepting 

@oleandercrowns​ said:  ‘ i tell myself i do not need you ’ (Egan to Seojoon)

     Seojoon wasn’t stupid, and he wasn’t blind. Maybe he hadn’t been created with all the natural emotions and responses of humans, but centuries had passed sine he was first given life. In that time, he had learned them, could feel them just as strongly as ‘real’ men did, and he could sometimes tell when others felt things as well. He was no empath, but intuition rarely failed him after so many years of practice.

I tell myself I do not need you.

The sigh that followed Egan’s words was soft and resigned, counter to how he usually reacted to off-the-wall things that the other man said. His head was already bowed, fingers ghosting along old Sanskrit as he read another page in the ancient book he’d been trying to decipher for months.

“I know you do.” There was nothing remotely accusatory in his tone, nothing joking or poking fun at what was said. Egan was proud, prouder than most – and with good reason. Seojoon knew better than to poke at that pride by saying anything that would be seen as mocking. “And somedays you manage to convince yourself that it’s true.” He looked up then, face as blank and devoid of emotion as he could make it – even though its presence was still evident in his tone. “Sometimes you convince me that it’s true.” Often, if he were honest.

“But you’re here, which means that perhaps you might not be so convinced.” The book was closed, placed at the side – which is where it usually ended up when they got involved in these discussions. “It’s okay to need someone, Egan. It’s okay to need me. You’re going to get mad, and you’re going to yell at me again – but I’m not him. I haven’t hurt you as he hurt you, and I would never hurt you like that. You asked once what someone like me would know of love, and you’re right. I don’t know much. Maybe I don’t know anything. But maybe I know enough to know that I would never treat you as he treated you – so if you need to tell yourself that you don’t need me, then please do. I won’t fight you on it, but I will say that it’s okay to need someone. It’s okay to want someone. You have that right, and that’s something he can never take from you.”

[wistfulreality]

[!] QUEUE TRACKER

since i’ll be away this weekend / lowkey panicking about all the things i have to do for my directory muses, i have everything that i’ve completed ( see below ) set to start posting on monday at 9 am on the hour so that i won’t be overwhelmed when i return. as i mentioned previously, i’ll probably start to look into which threads i might consider dropping ( or re-plotting ) since my muse is sort of struggling on a few things ... ><

@rvsetum - ahin x kana

@soonlight - wooyoung x seonmi

@rvsetum - changwoo x soojin

@rvsetum - soohyuk x hayoon

@rvsetum - minyoung x seungwoo

@rxdiancx - haein x jinyoung

@rxdiancx - jingoo x kaeun

@amissums - woohyun x yebin

@windflcwers - eunha x dongwon

@peachyuus - wooyoung x jisook

@blvckvelvets - minyoung x jaehwa

@blvckvelvets - minho x yeona

@cocacolx - seojoon x dabin

@osayroleplay - belle x alex

@peachyuus - yena x won

[wistfulreality]

DROPPED THREADS

i apologize for having to drop some things, but many of these threads i’ve lost muse for or they haven’t been replied to in some time. please let me know if there’s something you are dying to keep. 

@amissums - woohyun x yebin

@azukiitas - namil x hyejin

@bluclights - jasmine x jay ; jingoo x rose ; seojoon x mioh

@cakewalts - jungwoo x yeeun ; hyerim x eunsoo

@everytingces - serri x milian

@httpyccngs - heejun x seoyun

@rxdiancx - jinyoung x haein ; kaeun x jingoo

@soonlight - wooyoung x seonmi

all other threads should be hopefully captured in my rpthreadtracker now. if yours is not there, please let me know!