#(tried to make it open ended so you can pick whatever muse you'd like)

[undyingguppywarrior]

Undyne Almost Hits monmuses

@monmuses​

Undyne was in the middle of some light training, having some time to kill before as it was the weekend, and what better way than practicing her aim as well as trying to work on the power of her spears. The guppy was getting into the zone, her attacks mostly hitting dead center to the make shift targets she drew on some rocks. The young monster was setting up for another spear, yet as she was going to release she slipped on a patch of mud, making her throw the magic spear in a random direction with full force. “Dang it, I hope I didn’t hit anyone by mistake.” She was quick to follow the direction, seeing someone standing in the distance. “Hey, you didn’t get hit by a spear did you? If you did, then that’s my bad, I slipped and threw it in the wrong direction.”

[lonely-lost-soul]

Under the Floorboards Part: X

(C!Technoblade x Reader)

First Part: Pt. I

Fanart for this chapter made by the wonderful @theoneandonlyyeti please show them love!

Content Warning: Itty Bitty Spice Ahead! Please be wary I will let you know when it stops and starts so you can skip!

~~~

You never thought you would want kids of your own, adopting already children was completely fine but when it came to having your own you weren't too sure. However, you do know what it might be like to have a baby, that is to say, your injured husband was basically an overgrown baby. Ultimately it was your fault, the man kept pulling his stitches trying to do anything, which made both you and Ranboo frustrated as hell. Technoblade just couldn't sit still and it was driving you mad, you'd scold him and much like a child he'd pout and tell you no. After the fourth time pulling the stitches while he was trying to tame a polar bear, you had bound him to the bed. Not physically, of course, but if you saw him out of bed you'd usher him back in with whatever bribes that were needed to convince. Technoblade was understandably not happy with this development, but the brides always seemed to work, if they didn't you'd pull out the big guns. Appealing to the voices always seemed to work without fail, whether it be only referring to them or ignoring him completely they always got him to shut up and sit down. At the end of the third week, he seemed to be so used to your constant attention and nurse-like tenderness that whenever you weren't fully tending to him he had a tantrum. You tried to be patient, especially because it was partially your fault he was injured in the first place, but you couldn't help but get annoyed at his clinginess.

"Techno. Baby, you have to let go of me." His arms were wrapped securely around your waist, you both were sitting on a small cot by the fire. You allowed him to get out of bed sometimes okay, you weren't a monster; so long as he wasn't out fighting monsters and blowing up nations. He let out a deep purr and buried his head in your chest,

"No, I don't think I will," He mused a smirk evident in his voice although you couldn't see his face. You tsked softly, running your fingers through his hair,

"Tech?"

"Hm."

"Let go of me or I will take a pair of scissors to your hair." His hands immediately released their hold on you, he pulled away from your warm body, a pout etched across his features. "Thank you, my love," You kissed his forehead and he relaxed just slightly. "You think you can make it to the kitchen on your own for some lunch?" You gave a tilt to your head and Technoblade smiled softly,

"I'll head there in a few minutes, I wanna try and clean up on my own first, I feel gross." Technoblade sat up with a wince his bandages needed cleaning, he gave his neck a crack to shake away any residual pain. He stood up letting the blankets slide down his body; his hair had been perpetually tied up in a messy bun; his stubble was also slightly overgrown. He needed a makeover desperately, the voices were very much in agreement when he caught a glimpse of himself in a nearby mirror. Steve, the polar bear Techno adopted, grunted as he felt Technoblade move. Technoblade watched you coo at the bear and kissed the top of his fuzzy head, for someone who was so mad he adopted him. You sure acted like the bear was your new best friend, especially considering you let the bear sleep in the bed with the both of you.

"Alright, any lunch requests?"

"Anything you desire," He gently rubbed his chin against your cheek and your nose scrunched up at the feeling.

"You're prickly."

"Good or bad?"

"Well, you're hot with the stubble. So I guess a little beard is a good thing," You scratched under his chin and he purred loudly.

'We are never shaving again are we in agreement on that? Yes, obviously. Anything for her.'

"Now shoo," You ushered him towards the bathroom he slid inside with a dopey smile. He heard you call Steve over to you making sure he was just as fed like any other person in your band of misfits. Once you were officially in the kitchen was when Technoblade got a good look at himself for the first time in weeks. He was right in assuming his facial hair definitely needed at least a trim, his hair probably could use one as well now that he thought about it. He undid the bun and let his hair fall over his shoulders, at this point, it reached his mid-back. It was a bit tangled and didn't feel as soft as it usually did, he was sick of it. Technoblade picked up his trusty bathroom sword and held it in his hands, he turned the sharp blade over in his hands a few times in contemplation. Technoblade moved and placed it on the edge of the sink, he moved his hair to the front of his chest, taking the sword in another hand and slicing through his pink locks. They fluttered to the floor and his eyes drifted back over to the mirror, his hair now came down just below his shoulders. He ran his fingers through his freshly cut hair, ruffling it up just a little, he liked the new look. Technoblade tossed his loose shirt on the floor and gently removed his bandages, he didn't even bother looking at his wound, it was just another scar to add to the hundreds littering his body. However, this one he was okay acquiring, he got it protecting you, the women he loved, from Dream. He smiled softly as the smell of food wafted through the house from downstairs.

He'd never truly get used to your domesticity.

Technoblade's pants were next as he turned on the shower, he slid into the water once it warmed up to the appropriate temperature. He let the water cascade down his face, it stung his fresh wound but it felt good to finally feel clean and fresh. The shower went much faster than usual now that he didn't have all that hair to wash. After the shower he wrapped a towel around his waist, it hung low on his hips as he shook out his wet hair much like a dog. He decided to stick a little braid in his hair just so he could add a little flair, a knock sounded on the door and he met his own eyes in the mirror. The door opened with a soft creak and you were standing in the doorway with a smile. He flushed when you let out a low whistle,

"Didn't mean to disturb you, hot stuff." You winked and he gave you a sharp look to cover up his embarrassment. "What's that for? We literally have seen one another naked like a million times," You snickered your smile turning fond as you drank in his body.

"Hey. My eyes are up here Princess," He mused grabbing your chin to make you look in his eyes. Now it was your turn to flush and he smirked devilishly, "I'm glad you like what you see." You reached up and ran your fingers through his hair playing with the freshly cut ends,

"You cut your hair." You murmured still mesmerized by Technoblade's red eyes, he hummed softly staring at your beautiful features. "It looks amazing, I love it, and I love you," You spoke tenderly hands running down his chest.

"I love you too Princess," Technoblade murmured trying to ignore the roaring voices in the back of his mind. They were pleading with him to kiss her, mark her up and go feral on his wife. He took in a shaky breath and you frowned, "the voices," he let out a deep chuckle, "they love you."

SPICE

"I love them too. So listen to them and kiss me already." You yanked him close using the top of his towel, he made an embarrassing noise when his towel began to slip, he felt like praying when it stayed up by some grace of God. Your lips crashed together and he let out a breathy sigh relaxing into your blistering kiss, his hands landed on your hips and he squeezed them tightly. Technoblade nipped at your mouth, his tusks brushing against your upper lip, and you made a soft sound in the back of your throat when you felt them make contact. It made Techno and the voices preen in delight as he pushed you against the wall of your bathroom, his big hands sliding up the bottom of your shirt. He felt your hands tug at the hair by his scalp and he let out a deep groan,

'Neck. Bite her neck. Leave a mark, leave many! We don't care, do something. Please Technoblade listen to us!'

Technoblade growled under his breath as he attacked your neck, you let your head fall back against the wall. You let out a little sound of your own, and he purred deeply pleased by your reactivity.

'She'd make such a good mother.'

SPICE OVER

Technoblade's eyes snapped open and he pulled away from your neck, you let out a deep whine of protest. You reached out to him, hands falling on the back of his neck, chest heaving deeply. That thought intermixed with the wishes of the voices, you a mother? Him a father? The thought shook him to the very core no matter how much his body liked the thought.

"Bubs...?" You asked drearily, eyes blinking as you came down from your mini-high, "You okay?"

"Fine." Technoblade cleared his throat, his ears red and he refused to meet his wife's eyes, you frowned in concern.

"Too much?"

"Sorry," Technoblade murmured sheepishly and you shook your head, pinching the warrior's cheek.

"Don't apologize for that, I'm a big girl." You laughed softly kissing the tip of his nose, "I wanted to tell you lunch was ready before you rudely interrupted me."

"Eh? Rudely?" He huffed as you moved away from the wall, a teasing grin on your lips, he watched you walk away with a swing of your hips and he groaned in distress. Technoblade gathered himself together and got changed, as he came down the ladder to see you wearing a little apron and had lunch set up on the counter. His heart stopped in his chest, you were just too cute and domestic, "meat and potatoes?" He piped up sniffing the air as he sat down at the table you nodded happily.

"I know it's your favorite. I thought you deserved it after everything," You hummed softly cupping his cheek before sitting down across from him. Technoblade raised a hard eyebrow and clicked his tongue,

"It was nothing, just a flesh wound." Technoblade waved you off digging into his meal, "I meant it when I said I'd kill for you."

"I know you would, and believe me that is so hot. Even so, I'd be lost without you, so I just want to thank you." You bit your lip fiddling with the lace of your apron, "I'll never be able to repay you."

Technoblade put his fork down and huffed, "Stop talking nonsense Princess, got that? You're my wife now you don't need to repay me for anything." You looked at your lap and smiled shyly, "I love you."

"I love you more."

He scoffed with a fond eye roll but didn't argue with you, instead choosing to focus on his meal. Technoblade looked up at you as you finished up your food, with a soft hum he tilted his head to the side, "Princess?"

"What's up bubs?"

"We should do some trading in the Nether, before you say no, it's an easy enough adventure where I won't get hurt. We just wear some gold, and we'll be in and out." He watched your eyebrow twitch, "I will go with or without you. Just so you know." You flicked some potato at him which he scoffed at with an eye roll,

"Fine. We can go, but no fighting anything got that," You pointed a stern finger at him, Technoblade scoffed but agreed nonetheless. You both got adorned in your finest gold and Technoblade couldn't help but grab your neck, tilting your head upwards to swallow your lips with a kiss. You giggled softly as you both walked towards the Nether, his tail was wrapped around your waist as he glared at anything with a pulse. When you wore gold, his piglin protectiveness won over his usual aloof self. He couldn't stop glancing at the gold wedding band on your hand as you entered the portal, the piglin's heads already were paying attention to the newcomers. Techno let out a low growl underneath his breath and at least some of them seemed to get the picture, Techno split his gold bricks with you and the two of you parted. Oddly enough, Technoblade was having difficulty finding anyone to trade with him, they'd huff and tell him to get lost in piglin and that rubbed him the wrong way. He only ended up getting a few pearls and some soul sand, Technoblade moved to find his wife only to see you surrounded by a horde of his brethren. His jaw tensed as he saw you flush as a piglin desperately handed you some netherite, you thanked them softly and their squeals increased happily. They were complimenting you in piglin not that you would understand them, gushing about how pretty you were and how good you looked dripping in gold. Technoblade and the voices weren't amused. His brow furrowed as the voices demanded blood, he tried to march over but he was practically shoved out of the way when they saw him trying to get closer to you. Technoblade snarled at their advancements, his hand twitching at his sword just itching to grab at it and spill their blood, but he couldn't risk hurting you in the process.

Couldn't they smell him all over you? Did they just not care that you were his?

Before the Blade could do anything too rash you picked up your head and locked eyes with him, a beaming smile coming across your features.

"Technoblade!" You called throwing your hand in the air and waving it frantically, "Come here! They're being super kind!" The piglin's all turned their heads to face Technoblade, out of reflex his shifted into his pig form and walked over to you. This time, his brethren cleared a path for him to get through, He pulled you against his chest protectively, he buried his nose in your neck glaring at anyone who dared come close to his wife. Much to Techno's relief they all looked unhappy with the development and walked away from you, to which you pouted at, "You scared them away you big grump."

"Good I don't like them touching what's mine," he spoke calmly which caused you to flush red,

"We were just trading Tech," You spoke shyly motioning to all the valuables you collected. He nodded against your neck about to say something else but he growled deep in his throat instead and tightened his grip on your waist. A baby piglin, with a shining red eye, was holding up a gold ingot towards your person, you cooed fondly. The baby seemed unperturbed by Technoblade's looming appearance and attitude, "Hi baby! Do you want to trade?" The piglin nodded rapidly puffing out their little cheeks, your heart melted in your chest. "Tech let me go," You whined, "I wanna trade with the baby."

"No." He huffed, grumbling in his throat, "Don't want you to." The baby glared at him, stomping his little hoof, holding out the ingot higher. "Get out of here before I punt you, kid," He bared his teeth. The brave kid once more wasn't fazed instead he glared right back at Technoblade making a small snarl of his own. He had his own pair of tusks that were just starting to appear on his bottom lip and you gave a little squeal and Technoblade glared at you, "Don't coo at it!"

"He's so cute though!" You argued, finally squirming out of his hold, you knelt in front of the excited piglin, he handed you the gold ingot excitedly, you examined it carefully. Technoblade huffed at you entertaining the young piglin, you pocketed the gold and handed the piglin a poppy. His single eye widened considerably as he took the flower from your hands, you figured you'd give him something from the overworld. He looked shell shocked as he oinked happily wrapping you in a little hug, "Aw you're so welcome buddy!" You giggled fondly brushing the tufts of fur on his head, you plucked the poppy from his hands and placed it behind his ear. The piglin touched the flower lightly before scurrying down a nearby cobblestone pathway, "Bye little guy!" You called out a sad smile appearing on your face, Technoblade narrowed his eyes. He knew that look, you had the look when you'd look at the other children on the server.

"Don't even think about it."

"Think about what?" You blinked looking up at him, "do you mean- oh Jesus Technoblade I'm not going to kidnap a child."

"Or adopt it! It could be an orphan. We know how I feel about those," He pointed a finger in your direction, you rolled your eyes dramatically.

"Babe we're both orphans-"

"Sorry is that a Ghast? I can't hear you gotta fight it to protect you."

"You piece of shit." You scoffed as Technoblade picked up his bag from his last location and walked off, in the direction of said Ghast. "No fighting Ghasts! You promised!" You chased after him once you came to that realization, "Technoblade!"

Eventually, you caught up with your husband and scolded him for his recklessness, he only snickered at your mother henning. As the both of you stepped back through the portal Technoblade shifted back to his regular form, he took your hand and led you back to your little cabin. Normally Technoblade would use his trident trick to get home, but you were with him and wanted to walk by your side, considering you didn't have a trident...yet. He noticed his mailbox had footprints in front of the box, his brows furrowed, who was in his domain.

"Head inside Princess, I'll join you in a minute." Technoblade kissed your cheek softly, you gave a little nod. As Technoblade walked over to the mailbox and opened it, inside was a deep scarlet letter with a seal on the front. His nose scrunched up in distaste, he grabbed a small knife from his pocket and tore the letter open. The letter inside the envelope was a lighter shade of red, the note was from BadBoyHalo saying he had some business he'd like to discuss with himself and his wife. That immediately didn't sit right with Techno, it set off a ton of red alarms in his head. What did BadBoyHalo need to talk to you about? Technoblade kissed his teeth, he supposed this meeting would be alright so long as he was with you and could protect you and your mind from whatever the demon man was planning. What stirred him out of his thoughts was a slight movement in his bag, his entire body stilled and he slipped his bag off, tossing it into the snow. His bag squealed in distress and he pulled his sword off his body and aimed it at the bag. Technoblade must've been so distracted by you, and the letter in the mailbox, he must've missed the little movements in his bag. He gritted his teeth and snarled deeply, the first thing he noticed was bright pink piglin ears, popping out of his bag, then a bright red poppy. It was the baby piglin who had taken a liking to you earlier, his sword lowered a little bit as his eyes looked up and locked with Technoblades.

It reminded him of how Phil found Technoblade when he was a kid.

His Piglin was a bit rusty, especially his piglin for young kids but he tried his best to communicate with the young boy as he sat upon his knees. He was shivering a little not used to the drastic temperature change.

"What are you doing here kid?" He asked in rough piglin, which to anyone listening would just sound like grunts and squeals. The boy marveled at Techno and that he could speak his language it seemed,

"I want to be with the nice lady."

Technoblade furrowed his brows, a frown etching across his features, "You can't stay here." The kid didn't like that as he glared up at the taller hybrid, "You have a family in the Nether?"

"No." He huffed out with a rapid shake of his head, Technoblade inwardly cursed before picking up the Piglin by the scruff of his neck. He let out a few grunts of protest trying to attack Technoblade's hand as he dragged him into your shared home.

"(Y/n)! Get in here!" He shouted a small clip evident in his voice showing his frustration in his tone. You slid down the ladder in one fell swoop, Steve was by your side growling ferociously at the intruder in Technoblade's hands.

Good to know he could trust Steve to protect you.

"What's wrong? Where's the fire?" You already asked, ready for a fight, Technoblade almost swooned, almost. "Um...bubs is that a child?"

"It's not a child! It's the child!" He held him up higher to show off the poppy in his fur behind his ear, "Look what you did now it's attached to you!"

"Don't be mean!" You scolded your lover taking the kid from his hand, he automatically buried his head in the side of your neck. "Hey, buddy, what's going on huh?"

"He said he didn't have a family. He's attached to you now, therefore making him your problem." He watched you side-eyed him, giving him a very clear dirty look, "He doesn't have a name either." You ran your fingers through the top of the young boy's fur, rolling your lip between your bottom teeth in thought.

"Let's call him Aether." You looked over at Technoblade a teasing smile appearing on your face, "we'll build him a little secret room to keep him safe."

"Aether...Like the god of light and the sky? Isn't that ironic- wait...HEH, what do you mean his own room?" Technoblade blinked rapidly as you slid down the ladder into the basement, "Princess, get back here this conversation is not over!" He chased after you, and with a huff, Steve began to follow the both of you, too curious to just ignore the baby in your arms.

"We can re-purpose Tommy's old room! Fix it up after someone blew it up." You gushed as the piglin squealed in your arms approvingly, "we'll decorate it just how you like it, I'll even paint the walls."

"He's NOT our son (Y/N)-"

"Maybe not our son but he's MY son."

Why did that make Technoblade feel a million times worse? Is this how Phil's wife felt when she was alive when Phil tried to take him in from the Nether.

"I'm not leaving him to fend for himself, especially because he sought us out," You whispered tenderly, "It doesn't sit right with me Tech...please." Technoblade watched you look up at him through big sad eyes, "you don't have to be a parental figure if you don't want to, I won't force that role on you. But I want to take care of Aether, least till he's old enough to officially fend for himself."

Technoblade chose not to correct you that he was already capable of fighting his own battles.

"Fine." He relented with a loud sigh, "just don't get him killed. I don't want to deal with you being upset over a dumb orphan."

"Not dumb." You huffed nudging him in the side, "but thank you." He felt your lips brush the corner of his mouth and he visibly relaxed. "I promise I won't bother you with him either, he'll be my responsibility." You assured Aether grunted in your hold almost like he was in agreement with that plan. Technoblade glared at the child and huffed,

"He better not be," Technoblade said as if to promise himself that he would not get attached to the piglin in your arms that looked so much like your son it filled him with warmth. Steam exited his nose in frustration, and you gave him a gentle pat on the cheek, "I'll talk to Phil about getting him some warmer clothes, but that doesn't mean I like him." The smile on your face was almost worth discussing this child with Phil, but only almost, you gently placed Aether on a spare bed by Bob.

"For now," You ruffled his pink fur "You'll stay down here. If you need anything just call me okay? We'll get you a walkie-talkie you can decorate with some stickers." Technoblade groaned from behind you, he had to gather materials for another radio, for a baby. Aether nodded excitedly and snuggled against the soft covers of the bed, you kissed the top of his eye socket. Steve nuzzled Aether's hand and he gently rubbed the top of the polar bear's head, Steve seemed to dub the Piglin acceptable and rested his face on the edge of his bed. "Good boy Steve, watch out for my boy." You headed back up the ladder Technoblade followed behind you wearily, Phil was going to make fun of him for this, the old man was going to call him soft.

Marriage has made him soft and a shameful part of him liked that feeling of domesticity. He swallowed thickly glancing over at your bright smile, you turned towards him and figured the letter in his pocket could wait a few more days.

"I'm going to send a letter to Phil, so he can grab clothes for the orphan on his way back." Technoblade sighed softly rubbing the bridge of his nose, which caused the smile to slip off of your face.

'Apologize to her right now. It's a kid how hard can it really be? You can handle it, he makes her happy. But it's an orphan and it smells. Yeah, like the Nether and smoke. So does Technoblade.'

He huffed at the voices mentally flipping them off, before lifting his hand and placing it on the top of your head. He watched you look up at him through long lashes and (e/c) eyes, "I guess it's not that big of a deal you nerd. So don't get all frowny at me, okay? We'll keep the kid safe." The smile reappeared and he let out a sigh of relief he didn't realize he was holding in,

"You do care," you cooed fondly and his heart squeezed in his chest. "You're gonna be Aether's dad just you wait."

"Yeah, maybe when pigs fly."

"Tech-"

"Don't say anything," his face turned red, "you know what I meant." You giggled and kissed his cheek, he walked over to the window and sent a crow out for Phil. He jolted feeling your hands on his back running up and down, you slid in front of him.

"Thank you, for all you do for me." Your soft lips traveled across his cheek and onto his lips, "Let me repay you." He felt the tips of your fingers grab at his chin, his eyes dropped closed, tail wrapping around your waist to pull you flush.

"Oh?"

"Hmhm," You purred out as you pressed your foreheads together, you both screamed however when a loud slam sounded against the door. It was thrown open moments after Phil was standing in the doorway, wings ruffled and crows screaming behind him.

"What the FUCK do you mean you have a child! (Y/n) was pregnant?! Since when?! What the fuck!"

"Miscommunication!" Technoblade shouted flush coming across his face, "The crows twisted my words! Last time I rely on them to relay a message!" You burst into hysterical laughter falling against Technoblade's chest,

"This is not funny!" Both Phil and Technoblade said simultaneously, both equally confused and flustered. Phil got here so fast it was ridiculous and judging by the bag on his back he came fully prepared with clothing and all.

"I adopted a piglin from the Nether, he hid in my stuff, you thought I was pregnant?" You were cackling holding your stomach, "Phil what the fuck!"

"What?" He sputtered flabbergasted, "it's not like you both aren't fucking! You smell like him constantly, you can't blame me for jumping to conclusions."

"You saw me yesterday! You have a son!"

"Shut the fuck up! I panicked!" Phil threw the bag at you and you caught it in your arms, still snickering. Meanwhile, Technoblade was still recovering from Phil's scare, "I just...got some of Wilbur's old clothes. Some old toys as well, whatever I could find."

"Thank you, grandpa," You teased to which he turned slightly red, Technoblade glared in your direction.

"He's not grandpa."

"I can be," Phil added raising his finger in the air, Technoblade gaped at him,

"Don't encourage her!" You laughed tossing the bag in Technoblade's general direction, his fast reflexes allowed him to catch the bag. "What are you expecting me to do with this?"

"Go give it to him," He watched you smirk and wanted to wrap his hands around your neck. "You both need to bond,"

"You said earlier I didn't have to!"

"I lied." You bared your teeth in a big smile, chills went down his spine staring at your face, "You have to at least get along with Aether. Plus, Phil and I need to talk."

"We do?"

"We do."

"I'm being lied to." Technoblade growled, "I can't believe this betrayal. Let's all lie to Technoblade, I'm such a victim, having to tend to an orphan my wife adopted." You flipped Technoblade off as he slid down the ladder into the basement. Aether was still asleep on the bed when he came down, the bag across his shoulder felt heavy as nervousness seeped into his skin.

He literally killed people and blew up an entire nation, why was this child making him nervous.

'Throw the bag at it. Have it fend for itself. Don't do that (Y/n) will be upset with you! So, not my problem. It will be our problem if Technoblade gets divorced! DIVORCED?! SHE'D NEVER! E. But she could, do we really want to deal with that. That's a lot of work to clean up.'

The bed shifted, stirring Technoblade out of his racing thoughts, he swallowed thickly before taking a deep breath.

"Hey, kid, wake up." Technoblade gruffly scoffed, tossing the bag on the bed and kissing his teeth. The piglin made a distressed noise jolting up in the bed and pulling the covers over his little body. "Calm down it's just me, Technoblade," He spoke back in Piglin to the child who seemed to ease up a little bit. "(Y/n) and Phil got you some stuff so open the bag and check so I can leave."

Aether eyed him wearily as he opened the soft yellow bag, he began to pull the items out with slight awe. Despite his tough exterior, Technoblade was oddly curious as he walked a bit closer to look inside the bag. Aether pulled out a soft yellow and black striped sweater and rubbed it against his cheeks, it seemed to be amazed at the softness of the material. Technoblade couldn't help but laugh a little, once again he thought of the first time he was introduced to the same material. A pair of overalls was next, they were covered in colorful patches and Aether's eyes lit up excitedly. He watched him scramble back into the bag as a few more things were pulled out, like a coloring book, a few colorful pens, an old busted walkie-talkie, and a small stuffed crow. Phil just had to shove that in there, he couldn't believe that the old man's first thought when he thought (y/n) was having a baby was to find a little stuffed crow, biased little shit.

"Thank you," Aether spoke softly in Piglin towards Technoblade, he blinked a little rapidly.

"Thank your grandpa Phil," Technoblade grunted before coughing, "No not grandpa-"

"Grandpa!" He beamed brightly, his little tail wagging rapidly behind him, Technoblade rubbed his eyes tiredly.

"Just go get changed kid," He grumbled, "So you can show (Y/n)." Aether slid off the bed, sweater, and clothes in hand and stumbled into a nearby bathroom. He came out a few moments later clad in his new outfit, in the meantime, Technoblade sat on the edge of his bed. Aether did a little twirl placing his hands on his hips, Techno held out a weak thumbs up and he seemed satisfied with that answer. Aether flopped back on the bed next to Technoblade and leaned against the pillows, an awkward silence stretched between the both of them. "Anyway...I guess I'll head back upstairs." Technoblade raised his hand and motioned to the ladder, his body tensed and it took all his willpower not to kick the child across the room as his instincts screamed at him to do. He blinked a few times and noticed Aether grabbed at his hands in order to get a closer look at the gold adorning his fingers. Aether began to run his hands over his gold rings,

ah, that made more sense.

"You like my rings?" Technoblade questioned watching him nod eagerly as he wiggled his fingers, "yeah I like 'em too. Got some for my Princess too, that's (Y/n)."

"Princess?"

"Hmhm, she looks beautiful in them," Technoblade hummed softly, an adoring look appearing on his face. Aether looked like he was holding onto every word, "We treat (Y/n) with respect she deserves understand? I see you messing with her. I mess with you back, got that kid?" Aether nodded,

"Same to you."

Technoblade barked out a small laugh and ruffled the fluff on top of Aether's head, "Off to a good start kid." Aether smiled shyly before going back to examining his jewelry, Technoblade shifted to get a little more comfortable as Aether settled in his lap. He continued to examine and twirl Technoblade's rings around until he glanced up and caught sight of his golden crown on top of his head. He desperately reached up for it and Technoblad leaned away from his grubby little hands, "Sorry, the crowns off-limits kids." Aether huffed puffing out his cheeks and Technoblade grumbled reluctantly placing the crown on his head, it was far too big for his little skull as it slipped past his forehead. He made some happy sounds and readjusted the crown, he leaned back against Technoblade relishing in not only the gold but also the attention.

Technoblade huffed out a laugh, maybe having a kid around wouldn't be so bad after all.

He looked back down at Aether and noticed the kid was asleep on his chest, his body locked up completely frozen in terror. Now, what was he going to do? He was trapped underneath a sleeping child, he awkwardly tried to maneuver Aether off himself but the kid had a strong grip on his chest. Technoblade cursed under his breath and figured he might as well get comfortable if he was trapped, he felt warm beneath the piglin and eventually drifted off to light sleep.

Philza and you quietly descended the ladder down into the basement, Technoblade hadn't come back up and the both of you were growing suspicious. You had to cover your mouth to stop an excited squeal from leaving your mouth, both your boys were cuddling on the bed, Technoblade's crown was slipping off Aether's head. You looked excitedly over at Phil whose face was soft and fond,

"Go on, take a picture." Phil glanced over at you motioning to the boys in bed before reaching into his pocket and pulling out a disposable camera.

"Thanks, Phil," You whispered snapping a quick picture of the bed, the click of the camera caused Technoblade's ears to twitch. The photograph came spitting out of the camera and you shook it waiting for it to develop, you were so hanging this picture up where everyone could see it. From across the room Technoblade's eyes cracked open, Phil nudged you forward,

"I'll head out, go spend time with your family." He ruffled the top of your head and flew up the ladder swiftly,

"Hm...was that Phil?" Technoblade grumbled under his breath, voice still deep with the hint of sleep.

"Yeah bubs," You whispered tenderly walking over to the edge of the bed, "he figured it was time to head out." You brushed strands of pink hair out of his eyes and he leaned into your touch, "make some room big guy." With an annoyed grumble, Technoblade moved over so you could lay down beside him and Aether, you gently brushed your thumb across the fur on the baby's cheeks. Just like your big warrior husband he snuggled against your hand. "So, I take it he's grown on you?"

"Shut up and go to sleep." Technoblade grumbled reaching over Aether to rest his big hand on your head, "hm tired." He closed his eyes and ignored your giggles, you pulled the blankets over the three of you and you drifted off into a deep sleep.

Meanwhile, underneath L'manburg the egg began to breathe and pulsate with life, it yearned to have the couple once again in the palm of its hand just like it did decades prior. Sir Billiam and Lady (Y/n) were their names if it remembered correctly, they'd follow in the eggs wishes again, that it knew for certain. Meeting them again was going to be fun.

~~~

@iamsuchasimp @victory-is-here @pastelmoonwitche @ignat1usaquar1us @v10dw4lk3r

[limenysnocket]

Salsa Lessons

Summary: Let's take a break... to go on vacation. Since Taika is a snowflake and can't handle the cold, take a trip down south to Puerto Rico!

Pairing: Taika Waititi x Reader

Warnings: SMUT-- oral (f receiving), unprotected sex, dom Taika, a little bit of degradation, swearing, alcohol, (slight) public sex. 18+ ;)

A/N: One last baecation before I disappear again, and I know this'll be good. I KNOW THIS IS LATE. Like... late LATE. Forgive me.

@honorarytenenbaum @olyvoyl @whatwememeintheshadows @mrtommyshelby @dandywaititi

•○●•○●•○●•

"MY FACE IS ON FIRE!" Taika was panting and fanning his burning cheeks. The moms running the stand you both went to were cackling at him.

It had been a day since you both landed in Puerto Rico, and after sleeping off the jet lag and trying some of the fine dining, the first thing to do was explore the city, San Juan, from start to finish. Coincidentally, you both walked right into the outdoor market area, where fresh produce was being bought and sold everywhere. That's when Taika, the jackass, got ballsy and decided to try a pepper from one of the stands. He had been warned.

Oh well... guess you can see how that went.

To make up for the commotion caused, you bought a pineapple and a papaya from the same stand, as well as a couple of exquisitely bottled cokes. Taika was consoled, given a bit of coconut milk, and sent right back down the boardwalk. That was the first and last time he tried a freebie from a pepper stand. He was complaining about how his tongue felt (you would have thought that might make him get a little quieter and talk less), and he didn't stop until half of his bottled soda was gone. He sort of forgot about the pain after that and started looking for souvenirs.

You began your walk with him at eight in the morning, sharp. It was near noon by the time you were finished, and Taika had two big bags of fruits and veggies, exotic jewelry, tour maps, and trinkets. You were starving, and, more than once, tried to steal a kiwi from his bags but he would always manage to catch you and slap your hand away.

"They're for later!" He'd say that or make up a different excuse each time.

Taika wasn't neglectful of your hunger, in the end. He took you to a nearby restaurant after doing some searching on his phone and dropping the bags off back at the hotel room.

The restaurant was quaint, but vibrant at the same time. There were colors, dancers, and live music played on a little wooden stage just meters away. Ordering was fine, but it took some time for Taika.

"I've never seen so many things with pineapple in it! And it's not pizza, so it's bound to be good!" He seemed so excited for the food. It made you happy, but you eventually had to pick for him since the waiter was getting tired of actually having to wait.

"I have something special planned for tonight!" Taika exclaimed, the alcoholic drink of his choice being waved around in his hand. You were already reaching for the napkins, afraid he was going to spill something.

So now he tells you...

"Should I be concerned?" your first question came out with ease.

"Honey, if it's anything with me, you should always be concerned," he was smug, but the look on your face told him he needed to fix his wording. "BUT! Uhm... No, no you shouldn't be concerned about where I'm taking you. It's going to be a blast, I promise!"

"Better not be lying, Taik," you warned, and he just started to grin. That made you nervous, but you put the feeling on hold when the food came out.

Two bowls of Asopao de Pollo were placed in front of you and Taika, and they were devoured briefly in the span of thirty minutes. Extra time was added because Taika decided to add hot sauce to his. 'It's to add a kick,' he said. Yeah, whatever.

The rest of the afternoon was spent snacking, and checking out the more historical side of Puerto Rico. Abandoned forts, old canons, battle fields, you name it. It was truly a blast, even when Taika became cocky around one of the forts you visited.

It was at the Sitio Histórico de San Juan when things got... touchy. You were with a group of people, and you and Taika decided to linger around the back so if something interesting was spotted, you wouldn't have to move immediately. Little did you know, Taika was devising a, "ditch the tour guide and go make out somewhere," kind of plan.

Much to your demise, and to your pleasure, the plan worked. The tour guide hardly noticed the two of you disappear down an unknown corridor and push yourselves deep into a dark corner.

The smell was wet, ancient, and dank. Taika had you pressed up against one of the concrete walls while his hands worked their magic, lifting up the hem of your shirt and immediately grasping for your bra. You let him squeeze and grip through the fabric of it and press his body so close to yours, the waistband of his shorts was rubbing a red line across the skin of your stomach.

Your legs trembled while you completely forgot about the tour itself and your fingers started to run through his curly hair. Taika's thigh was moving to be between both of yours and he started to slowly rub the top of his against your clothed cunt. Slowly. Achingly slow.

Whimpers of his name and the sound of your tongue mixing echoed along the dank walls, and whimpers turned to moans, and moans turned into garbled sentences when his hand sunk into your underwear and sought out your clit. You tried to warn him, this was a bad idea. You could be noticed missing from the group and people could come looking for you. There could be papz right around the corner, needing a good look for a filthy headline. He didn't stop, though. He started rubbing faster, playing with you like you were some toy.

You knew he wouldn't give you anything but his fingers. Yet. Taika waited and waited, getting you closer on just clit stimulation, but just as you reached your brink, he started to pull his hand away. Dazed and confused, you looked up, your chest shaking from all the heavy breathing you had been doing. Your hands were grasping at his shirt, damn near begging to have just the tiniest bit more, but the look on his face said it all. Even through the darkness of the corridor.

"What the fuck, dude? I was so close!" You hissed at him. All he did was click his tongue and say:

"That's for later too."

The rest of the tour was dreadful to you. It was long, and hot, and dank while you found your way back to the group. Taika was nonchalantly following just a ways behind you while you consistently traveled in circles or down a corridor and through the next. As if he knew you were getting yourself lost, he eventually stepped in, and lead you back towards the entrance of the fort, where your tour group had huddled together for the last destination and for the tour guide to say goodbye. Oh well, at least you got to take in some historical views.

After one more cramped trolley ride back to the hotel later, you were utterly exhausted, but you knew your night wasn't over yet. Taika still had something planned, and it must have been on the spot this morning too. If he had planned it any further back, he would have blabbed it all out to you by now. You laid on your bed while you could, right on your stomach with your face buried into the pillow, trying to let your heavy eyes fall closed for a second, but the moment you did, you felt a large hand smack you right on the ass.

You flipped over, mad as a hornet when you looked up at Taika. You hadn't heard him come out of the bathroom.

He had dressed himself up in all black. Black button up, tucked into his black pants and pressed firm with a black belt. He looked like one of those pit musicians you'd see when you go to really good musicals with live orchestras.

"Dirty Dancing cosplay, ooor?" you nipped at him and he rolled his eyes.

"Ha ha, you're funny," the sarcasm dripped from him. He then threw a piece of (also black) clothing on. "Put that on."

The reluctance was real, but you followed his orders anyway, grumbling and griping your way through. Turns out it was a dress. A short one, at that, only going down to be just half way down your thighs, but it was comfortable enough. Luckily you had a pair of flats with a slight heel in your bag to pair with it. You had no idea where you were going with him, but you were not about to walk there in heels.

Taika was giving you "the eyes" as you walked out of the bathroom, admittedly messing with the hem of your dress to try and bring it down lower. As a result, came more cleavage that you would have liked, but oh well. At least Taika enjoyed the view.

He took the grocery bags in his hands and in the crook of his arms, and like that, it was time to go.

"We'll be late if we don't rush!" he hurried you. You knew that was just a big fat lie, and he was excited to get to wherever you were going, but you played along for as long as you could.

Taika made you go down the boardwalk again, through flourishes of people while the bags in his arms still jostled from side to side. Eventually, you stopped, just outside of a well lit building, and he took you inside.

He stepped up to a desk, signed something, and set all of the groceries down on the desk. While he did those things, you had a look around. To your left, deeper into the building and with dimmer lighting, there were tables and chairs set up. Almost all of the tables were meant for two, or for four. Before you could investigate further, Taika was back to leading you around, through a few more doors, which opened up to a big ballroom.

A few more people were waiting there, dressed almost in the same fashion as you or even a bit more flamboyantly, and obviously coupled up. Taika wrapped his arm around your waist and made you jolt.

"Care to dance?" he mused quietly and you gulped. You've got to be fucking kidding.

"You're joking," you murmured, but he wasn't, because he took you right over to the group of other couples and started conversing with them while you started to freak out quietly.

Honestly, you had never been the greatest dancer on earth. Sure, you could cut a rug from time to time, but that was in the privacy of your own home or at Taika's place if he happened to pick out a really good song worth dancing to. You knew Taika loved to see you dance, he loved to dance with you most of all, but you both never got into anything fancy.

Now was the time.

Soon, your instructors announced themselves, and the room fell mute while they introduced themselves in their very heavy Spanish accents. You stuck to Taika's side most of the time, even as the mood was set and stone. You would be learning to salsa dance. But what did this have to do with the food? You'd find out later.

To put it simply, things got... touchy. Of course, the one and only Waititi was the one touching you, wrapping his big, strong hands around your hips and making them sway back and forth, but it was personal at some point. His hips were pushed against yours most of the time, and that awakened a more primal sense.

Once the dance had been established, the lavish music and the glow of sweat and cologne heightened your senses, and the lights began to dim or flash with lavish pinks, purples, reds, yellows, and greens. You got lost in the feeling as Taika set his hands on your hips again, his warm palms making your legs ache to feel his skin touch yours. Your back was against his chest while the footwork got complicated. Focused, yet mystical.

All the couples around you, doing the same moves as you, turned to blurry blobs, and your breathing got heavier as the pace of the music piece got faster and faster. Taika's breath drew across your ear, and made you shudder. It nearly knocked you out of focus, because you bumped your hips backwards, and pushed your ass against his hips. Like a chain reaction, you felt his hands squeeze your hips a little more than he was supposed to. So, you bumped your hips back against his again, and suddenly you were whipped around by his hands, and pulled flat against his chest.

The bodies around you still writhed and moved with beauty and grace, then there was you and Taika... in the very middle of the dancefloor while a small hard on pressed against the side of your thigh. He was looking down at you, and through the darkness, just like in the corridor, you could see his expression. It was a look of want. Need.

Before anything could be done, however, the lights flashed back on, and the song had finished. Only you and Taika were out of position. The instructors paid no mind. They just clapped, as well as everyone else. Taika removed his hands from you, but made sure you were close enough to hide the little bump in his pants. You hoped there was nothing other than this, because now you really wanted to get back to the hotel room.

The couples started filing out of the room, back to where the tables and chairs were, and Taika kept you in front of him the entire time, pressed almost a little too closely to him.

"Mr. Waititi," a waitress called to him from the kitchen as you met the front desk again. "Your food has been prepared."

Taika looked at the waitress, then to you. He was debating something. You knew what, but you'd let him figure this out for himself. He was the one with the more visible problem.

"Awesome," Taika sighed, then looked down at you. "Join me for a bite real fast?" He said it through almost gritted teeth. Reluctantly... you agreed.

If it was worth it, that's for you to decide. This place had taken the groceries you bought, fruits and veggies, and made a beautiful dinner with mango kiwi sangria. With the time the lessons had taken, the chefs in the kitchen had made the perfect meal. They had even thrown in a few extra elements like chorizo and perfectly cooked rice dishes. As much as you loved the food, you couldn't forget about the need between your legs. And it was obvious Taika couldnt simply forget about his.

You would watch him squirm in his seat while he sipped on his drink, or you would find him staring at you a little more than usual, and little more intensely with each second. His eyes would gloss over, and his breathing would slow, but he'd snap out of it, only when you said something to him, or a server came out of nowhere to check on both of your meals.

Even if the dinner wasn't as romantic (although more sexually charged than you expected), you still had a fantastic time. As soon as Taika finished his dish, he paid the check and was quick to dash out the door with you at his side. Sure, you managed to have enough time to pack up what was left of your food for later, but that hardly deterred Taika's speed and agility.

The walk back to the hotel room went by faster than you thought. The crowds had started to dwindle, and lights began to dim, because all of the shops and side markets had finally closed down after a long day of work. There was just enough darkness to cover the fact that Taika had his hands all over you. All the way to your room.

The moment you touch the door handle, the frenzy began.

He closed the door with his foot, and with both hands, he grabbed your hips and slammed you against the nearest wall he could find. His lips breathed over yours, whispering dirty praises and hot needs, and his hands reached down to pull up your dress to bunch it around your waist. His hand reached between your thighs, and cupped your wet panties, just over your folds. He started to stroke it, while his lips teased over yours, never kissing you, but needing you.

His strong fingers prodded through the fabric, seeking and searching like he had done with you in the corridor of the filthy base. Filthy actions in filthy places.

You moaned for him, but he seemed busy. He continued to bunch up your dress until your stomach was exposed to him. His parched lips drug themselves down your collarbone, again, avoiding your lips, while your hand shot up into his curly hair.

"Fuck, baby," he muttered, opening his dirty mouth just to use his teeth on you. He bit down on your skin, making a hiss seethe from you through your clenched jaw. "You're so fucking beautiful... making my dick so fucking hard."

You watched him kneel, the position making his pants crumple up, but the bulge in his black pants remained as prominent as ever. His nose brushed over your stomach, and you could feel his tongue prop out softly and hover over the hem of your underwear, just as well as his teeth hooking into them. Your thighs spread on their own, and he started to pull your underwear downwards.

He could see the glisten on your clit and the need drip down your thighs. His tongue poked out again, and you felt it slide across your inner thigh. It crept higher and higher,

He placed sloppy kisses along the soft flesh. The kind of kiss that you could hear. The smack and the pop from the wetness and eagerness to taste more of you and take more of you in. He needed that, and he only got more of it as he neared your core.

"Such a wet fuckin pussy, baby," he groaned and placed his tongue along the lips of your folds. His tongue drug itself along the slit, and dipped in to be right on your aching clit. He swiped his tongue back down, pushing it along your hole. Your legs began to tremble, and he began to dig in like the meal you had gotten at the restaurant only whet his appetite.

He took you seriously this time. The rough pads of his finger nimbly drifting along your hips, tracing every mark, every bump, and every hair, because he wanted to memorize this feeling. He also wanted you to remember these exact moments, when he ate your pussy out on the exotic islands of Puerto Rico.

You gripped his hair so tight, but that only pushed him further into your cunt. His nose swiped along, to add flavor to the sensation. His face, most certainly, would be dripping with you by the end of the night.

How long this went on for? You didn't know. You also didn't know it his goal was to disturb your neighbors, because you got pretty fucking for him at some point. He didn't stop until he was satisfied, and you didn't bother keeping track of how many times you had cum on his tongue. You knew he loved the taste. He loved your taste.

Eventually, you both made it back to the bed for once, after one or two earth shattering orgasms. Thighs shaking, breaths colliding, and tongues twisting. His lips touched yours and your mouth was immediately drenched in your own taste, mixed with his.

He got you out of your dress. You stripped him of his clothes. Skin met skin, and it was an instantaneous bon fire of pure, raw sex.

His hand met your throat and he pushed you against the bed while he sat between your legs, unconsciously rubbing his dick through your folds. His lips were on yours again, and he gave your throat a gentle squeeze from time to time.

"Fuck, Taik, just put it in me," you breathed desperately, and the air grew thick. Your eyes never met his. You just watched the way his hips rolled into you, and took the time to feel his scratchy hair rub against your belly each time. You were addicted.

"You're so soft..." His large hands trailed down your stomach, "I'd rather just play with you and see what would happen if I teased you some more." His snickering and plotting drew a whine from you. It sounded so pitiful, he knew you were on the edge already.

"Aw, pretty girl?" He clicked his tongue in a fake sympathetic way, "You don't like to play games, do you? That's such a shame... I thought fuck dolls loved to be played with."

"Taika," you whined again, and you started to wriggle beneath him.

Taika didn't usually mind it when you wiggled about, but something about tonight, it really pissed him off a small bit.

"You want it?" He hissed. "Fucking fine."

You nearly screamed so loud, the hotel walls would have shook, but he shoved himself in, with hardly any warning, and slapped a hand over your mouth.

"You're such a loudmouth... just shut up and take it," he muttered by your ear, and his hips wasted no time making a fool out of you. While one of his hands stayed over your mouth, the other was planted by your head, almost threateningly, and he gripped the bedsheets. If you had just turned your head a little bit, you would have seen the veins popping on his wrist.

Taika pressed his thumb right on the high of your cheekbone, keeping your mouth clamped shut harder as he lost himself in you. Fuck it, you were gone too. High as a kite as he pummeled you and fucked you up something awful.

He was making your sore already, with the intense clap of his hips that never seemed to slow. He was persistent. He was determined.

You let yourself cum for him way too many times that night, and he knew it. He would watch your eyes roll back, and the way your body would weakly tense each time, like you were recieving an electric shock to the brain. And he kept going. He kept going for a long time.

You just let him use you as the night went on, and the look of satisfaction grew more intensely each time you spilled over. It went on and on and on... until he suddenly just couldn't take it anymore.

"Oh my God," he panted, finally letting you speak out and be more vocal, but he had knocked all the breath from your lungs, so there was nothing you could say. "You're so fucking tight... so fuckin pretty, holy shit."

Taika's head rocked back and his eyes watched the ceiling. Shit. He was starting to give out. Shit, shit, shit.

He hunched back over, his thrusts becoming uneven with the ache of anxiousness and lust. It was a blissful, awful, horrible mix. Taika fucking loved it.

A grunt, a groan, and a brand new hickey to get him through it. He finally gave in, burying his face in the same shoulder he marked you on, kissing, lapping and nipping at your skin, as he came, and filled you up.

His body shook and quivered like an earthquake, and soon he felt much heavier on you. Exhaustion kicked in, and you felt like falling asleep right then and there.

You managed a hand to rub up and down his back, comfortingly, and he would let out the occasional groan in response.

"Do you have any more surprises I should be aware of?" you asked, voice hoarse and very very quiet.

"I might," Taika asked after a long pause of silence. "But those are for later..."

[retrogradedreaming]

heyyyyyy if you wanna write more sk8 prompt / headcanon things,,, may i request (imma give you options because i am ✨indecisive✨and don't know what you'd want to write lol)

okay so shadow giving the group friendship bracelets (idk how you feel about writing for shadow hence the other options because i panicked and this was the first thing i thought of lol)

or langa just sitting down and talking to carla because i feel like he would (also kind of a weird one lol)

or uhhh oH you like matchablossom ! joe feeling self-conscious about acne scars (or having acne as a teen ???) and cherry telling him that he's beautiful (in whatever way cherry would iuygfyuhi)

sorry for three options lol this is also partially a way to procrastinate doing my homework ✌🏻so thank you for providing me a means of distraction anYWAYS HAVE A GOOD DAY iuhgcfghuijokijhgv

Sorry this took a while!! I went with the first prompt for a challenge and it ended up WAY longer than I thought. I hope you like it! And thanks for sending these! I love the other ideas, too, so I might come back to them.

---

If there was anything Shadow knew, it was how to curate an image. At work, he created arrangements and bouquets to say exactly what the customer wanted. When he skated, he was the clown punk of the S community. Until recently, he’d never let those identities overlap. Now that they had, it felt almost like forming a third persona—except this wasn’t one he had to work so hard to maintain.

He’d started making the bracelets offhandedly at work on a slow afternoon at the flower shop, braiding and weaving colorful thread from the supply drawer. They normally used it to dress up orders, but there was so much that they wouldn’t miss a few feet. He didn’t realize that he was making them for his new group of friends until he’d finished the second one, and by then it seemed a waste not to finish the job. Now that he had friends who knew and actually liked both sides of him, he felt like they deserved...something. Something to show them what it meant to him, that it mattered.

And yet, once he’d finished them all, the idea of giving them to everyone made his chest tighten as he thought that maybe they’d all judge him after all. As Shadow, it was easier to pretend not to care, but he couldn’t pretend it wouldn’t mean something—something he didn’t want it to mean—if they did.

Still, the next night he showed up at S, five bracelets laden with charms and beads clacking together in his pocket. He swore he could hear them, even with the crowd around him. His palms sweat beneath his gloves, and he was only grateful that no one else could see how nervous he was behind his makeup. He couldn’t remember the last time he was this nervous, even for a beef. This should be easy. His friends wouldn’t just reject him over some bracelets. And if they took them home and threw them away, well...at least he wouldn’t be there to see it, so what did he care?

“Hey, you good, Shadow?”

Shadow jumped, and it was only when he stopped to look for the source of the voice that he noticed that he’d walked right by the same people he’d been looking for. Reki leaned forward, one foot on his board, looking intently at Shadow and obviously expecting an answer.

“Of course I’m good,” Shadow barked, but Reki didn’t seem convinced. He raised a brow and shrugged, shoving one hand in his pocket and absently raising one of his hoodie strings to put it between his teeth.

“If you say so,” Reki said, settling back against Langa’s shoulder. “You seem kinda weird tonight, though.”

“What do you mean weird?” Shadow shouted, voice low and gravelly. “I’m supposed to be weird! It’s not my fault you don’t know what it means to get into character.”

“He’s right, though,” Miya chimed in. “It’s outside your normal weirdness, and it’s kind of creeping me out.”

“I didn’t even do anything!” Shadow exclaimed, and his heart sank. This was exactly what he’d been afraid of, and part of him was already shoving his plan to the back of his mind, ready to leave the bracelets in his pocket and toss them himself once he got home. He could do it, and no one would know but him.

“It’s true,” Cherry mused from where he stood in Joe’s shadow. “You don’t usually look so...bothered when you’re here.”

“Listen—” Shadow began, whipping his hand from his pocket, only to hear a soft clacking as two of the bracelets hit the ground—the one he’d intended for Reki, bright red and decorated with beads of different sizes and a bright orange alstroemeria flower charm, and the other for Langa, soft blue thread woven simply with a white gerbera.

“What’s that?” Miya asked before Shadow could scoop them up and hide them again. He almost did anyway, almost tried to pass them off as some trick meant for a beef he wasn’t even skating tonight. In the end, he resigned himself to risking every single friendship he’d built over the past several months, and sighed as he held out the bracelets to Reki and Langa.

“I made them,” he said, and his voice lost some of the edge he reserved for his S persona. “Sorry I didn’t wrap them or anything. I didn’t wanna do anything too fancy, y’know? Anyway, if you hate it, at least wait until I’m not around to get rid of ‘em.”

Reki took his without hesitation, Langa picking his own up out of Shadow’s palm like he might break it if he weren’t careful. Reki twisted the beads between his fingers, rubbing them over the different sizes like they were a miniature skating course as a grin spread across his face. Langa immediately tried putting his on, fumbling until Reki paused long enough to help him tie it around his wrist.

“It’s soft,” Langa said, running his fingertips over the delicate braiding, and that told Shadow all he needed to know. Langa was particular about textures, and he always stuck with the same clothing brands because he knew how the fabric felt. Shadow knew to take it as a compliment when Langa left the bracelet on.

A weight felt like it had lifted from Shadow’s shoulders, and he let himself relax. He took the last three bracelets from his pocket, offering the next to Miya. The vibrant purple thread stood out next to the others, and it was the only one he’d added an extra charm to—a silver cat paw—along with the freesia he’d chosen for the youngest member of their group.

“I didn’t know a slime could make something so tasteful,” Miya remarked as he let Shadow tie it around his wrist.

“Watch who you’re calling a slime,” Shadow growled, though there was almost no bite behind the words. “I can always take that back.”

“After all that just to take it out of your pocket?” Miya scoffed, flicking the paw with a finger. “You wouldn’t.”

It was true, Shadow thought, as he turned to give the last two to Cherry and Joe. He wouldn’t dare take them back when his friends actually seemed to like them, and even more than that seemed grateful to receive them. It was what he’d hoped for, but he’d also learned by now to hope for the best and expect the worst so he didn’t get too disappointed if things didn’t work out. After all, so few things in his life had happened as he expected, for better or worse, and now, as he handed over a thin pink and brown woven bracelet and another green and woven like thick rope, he wanted to savor this thing that had.

“Hey, it’s not a cherry blossom,” Joe pointed out as he peered sideways at Cherry’s bracelet.

“Yeah, I thought it would be too obvious,” Shadow said, rubbing the back of his neck.

“The zinnia is appropriate,” Cherry said, eyes roving over Shadow’s handiwork as if he were trying to find fault. And yet, when he took his eyes away from it, he gave Shadow a smile that Shadow recognized as the same one he practiced for most others at S—except this one reached his eyes. “A symbol of acclaim and enduring friendship, correct? Certainly more refined than jealousy.”

“What do you mean?” Joe demanded when Cherry gestured to the bracelet in his hands.

“A yellow rose stands for jealousy,” Cherry said matter-of-factly.

“It means friendship, too,” Shadow cut in before their squabbling could turn into a full blown argument. What he didn’t say was that he knew yellow roses also symbolized jealousy. He worked at a flower shop, after all, and had put together enough subtle spite bouquets for people forced into occasions they didn’t want to attend that he of course knew all the various meanings of different flowers. Roses were some of the most versatile, and he’d hoped no one would pick up on the alternate meaning—the one that said he envied Joe’s strength as much as he valued his friendship.

“Put it on for me,” Cherry said, holding the bracelet out to Joe and lifting the hem of his pants to reveal his ankle.

“Sure, princess,” Joe said, taking the bracelet and stooping to the ground.

“Where’s yours?” Langa asked, eyes migrating to Shadow’s wrists, clad only in his spiked gloves. Shadow followed his gaze, turning his hands over absently, as if he didn’t already know he’d never made himself a bracelet.

“I didn’t make myself one,” he said. “It’s kinda weird to make a friendship bracelet for yourself.”

“I don’t think so,” Langa mused. “You’re our friend, so you shouldn’t be the only one without a bracelet.”

“Hey, yeah,” Reki said, grasping Shadow’s hand and inspecting his wrist like if he looked hard enough, a bracelet would materialize.

Shadow pulled his hand away. “It’s not a big deal. I made those for you guys because you’re the only people who know this me and the other me. I just wanted to do something to show that I...well…”

“That you care,” Miya supplied, and Shadow was glad that his mask covered the heat that rose to his face.

“Whatever,” he muttered, only to catch Reki and Joe both grinning out of the corner of his eye.

“It’s still not the same if you don’t have one,” Reki said, tapping at the beads on his own bracelet. He thought for a moment, and just as Shadow opened his mouth to say it was fine, that he’d make himself one eventually if it was that big a deal, Reki’s face lit up. Before Shadow could ask about it, the group was already dissolving to skate, each person wearing their respective bracelets.

The next time they gathered at S, Reki gave Shadow a gift of his own—a bracelet woven in orange thread bearing a yellow chrysanthemum.

[appledotcodotuk]

why the hive fckin suck at its job: a rant

spoilers for tgwdlm ahead!

first of all, it's important to consider what exactly the hive's job is. my answer is... who the fuck knows. literally. what is the hive's aim. what do you want Paul? more like, what do you want hive? let's find out!

it kinda evolves, as the play progresses. the intial aim of the hive, and one that does actually remain consistent is the constant burning need to grow and devour and gain more and more (insert capitalism metaphor here).

however, this is distorted by the people it possess who influence that aim, as we'll see later.

also the fact it crashes into a theatre displaying Mamma Mia gives the hive the motive it need to fit the world around it to the structure of the musical. having no originality of its own, the hive instead just picks up what is given to it. kinda like an evil baby.

it wants uniformity, that is indeed its ultimate goal and desire, no duh. it thinks it can achieve that through musical theatre, shame that the hive is dead wrong. cause the hive fucking sucks at its own job / aim / ultimate purpose / one concrete goal that motivates all its actions.

can't maintain control over its subjects

okay, so, the hive wants uniformity. it wants everyone to be dancing to the beat of its own tune. right? yeah. shame it literally can't keep its own possessed subjects in line at all. at the risk of sounding like the 10th doctor waxing lyrical abt humanity for the 50th time, humans are really difficult to control cause we're not really motivated by an altruistic allegiance to one primary good. we've got icky emotions that often move us to do stupid unpredictable stuff way more. it makes me wonder if the reason the hive wanted to use musical theatre to try and persuade ppl was cause it seems to think that is how theyll get emotive humans; through emotive songs. anyways. let's look at some examples shall weeeee?

Mr Davidson:

so, Mr Davidson. funnily enough, he's the guy whose in part acting as the hive trying to figure out what it wants through his interactions w/ Paul. every person it possess gives it just a bit more humanity and curiosity abt the world it is currently taking over. at least I think so. hence why as the musical develops u get character's like possessed!Alice wondering 'why does it hurt to love?' - the change in music and mood to something much more introspective really suggests to me that the hive is beginning to question the thoughts and emotions of its human hosts.

Mr Davidson is a family man through and through, he loves his wife Carol. she's his muse, his source of light. his feelings for her are not concrete or easy to explain and solve - hence why his sudden ahem demand of her is so hilarious and also jarring. it completely clashes with the 'I want song' which is simple, and often pushes forward a wider cause. not so with Mr Davidson, he just really loves his wife man. enough to break a frickin alien possession.

tbh I think its hilarious that (at least to me) the hive has to force him to forget and continue with the song, like, he straight up is just talking to his wife in that phone call, talking, not singing. so, no possession until he reverts back into song. ergo, the hive cannot maintain the uniformity it wants. even from the get go when theoretically its control should be stronger cause it has less ppl to co-ordinate. bad. at. its. job.

Paul:

this one hurts folks. yes, I know it's generally agreed, though somewhat debated that the state of Paul by the end of the tgwdlm is not purely possessed. I agree. once again, the hive is unable to truly enforce uniformity.

at this point, the motives of Paul and the hive are kinda just mixed, neither fully human nor fully alien. hence the constant shifts between pleeing for her to get away, to hide, to stay safe: 'what if the only choice is you have to sing to survive' and just full on old style hive nastiness 'let me puke in your mouth and just open your food bin girl' (so romantic 🥰 /j).

the hive has gone away from its original aim, and become something... different. no longer stuck to just one type of genre or style of song, it's really clever to show the developing complexity of the hive by showing how it is now juggling lots of different motifs with references to all the old songs from before recontextualised in a new way - its learning. evil baby... no longer uniform.

general miscommunication:

there are several instances of the hive not fully having uniform control over its subjects. for instance, right after not your seed with the three teens having to like... calibrate. they aren't just completely connected then?? also, this is a very small thing, but uhhhh at the end of inevitable when Paul is about to say the apotheosis is upon... the chorus interrupts him with USSSSSSS. interruptions??? not very in sync of u hive.

I think this inability to exert uniformity is also shown in the contrast between genre of musical theatre. my alien abomination cannot decide whether it wants to be the more modern edgy rock musical (join us (and die), not your seed ) or super happy go lucky old style musical theatre (lah dee dah dah day, and inevitable). it tries to do both, even while trying to encourage union, and sticking to one thing. hypocrite!!!!!

2. aims are guided by the people it possess

so, I mentioned this a bit already, but the hive isn't only mutating the humans, the humans are mutating the hive right back. this is more an interesting observation than any actual analysis but let's goooo.

greenpeace girl:

I think it's very likely that greenpeace girl is one of the first to be possessed. This is probably easily debunkable but whatever this analysis is flying by the seat or its pants anywayyyyy. why? cause where else would it pick up that whole 'this planet needs fixing' thing? it's interesting too, cause it morphs from expressing the desire to join hands and sing together, unity and peace with no actual action behind it. this then goes right to the other end, with the hive going 'fine I'll do it myself' and trying to save things by enforcing a dictatorship on the world. it develops and changes, and strays from its original means of accomplishing its aims! speaking oooooof...

3. inconsistent in means of accomplishing aims

okay, ur an evil hive mind. u think musicals are the way to win over these silly humans cause they're all weak and emotive and seem to respond to them. but, wait! schwoopsie! you haven't realised that for emotional depth and growth to mean anything, you need there to be established development and well... growth. otherwise the sentiments are as vague as the ones expressed in What Do You Want, Paul?

this show has genuine emotional moments, just not really during the musical numbers WITH EXCEPTIONS. any strife is smoothed over quickly, and so the development and change that would have to go into such growth is just gone. (see, You Tied Up My Heart) all so it can achieve its own desire to grow and grow and grow, maybe a metaphor for art being killed under late stage capitalism??

what actually matters is the impact the songs have afterwards, in causing a death - because we have a bond and care abt these characters. those short scenes between Paul and Emma are actually way more resonant than any song. except... inevitable, and also not your seed a bit. at this point the hive has learnt a thing or two, and can actually twist human emotion a little. but for it to do that, it has to reject the uniformity it prizes, and be adaptable. point towards being more human than it first thought? methinks so. and yet it's just not enough...

it's also why let it out, to me, feels really ingenuine. Paul has expressed himself in much better ways already. what they're doing is clearly paining him, and hurting the guy. he's terrified bless.

you can't force someone into being emotional vulnerable, man.

it's why all the deaths for the characters who are forced to express themselves are really violent, involving them being ripped open - literally forcing them to expose themselves from the 'inside out' as Alice reflects in Not Your Seed. you can't force genuine emotional connection, it has to be fostered, shown in the much more affecting relationship of Paul and Emma. the only reason the hive actually has power over our characters is because of these genuine emotional connections, which it tries and often fails to take advantage of, resulting in just resorting to brute violence. messy hive, very messy.

at the core, the musical's a kinda attack on that toxic positivity mindst: trying to force people to reach the sort of easy solutions by sharing feelings in a way that feels pretty invasive and deciding you are instantly fixed. the problems these characters face are jarringly not really what you'd expect a character in a musical to face, cheating, a lot of it, mid-life crisis. problems that are bland, or wayyyy too real. this is purposefully done, to reveal just how silly the hive's aim to use musical theatre to solve everyone's problem is. life is more complex than that smh.

4. a human can write a much more expressive, and genuine song than they ever could lol

u know which song I'm talking abt. what more is there to say. so much for making persuasive songs to tempt people over.

5. make me sad cause they took some perfectly nice ppl and funked them up 😭

this was a stupid point lol. basically I'm just bitter that this hive took a bunch of perfectly okay ppl and gave them hive brain. screw u hive. I swear I'm gonna watch Black Friday soon, cause I'm sure it's gonna completely destroy every thought I've had so far, but whateve,,, just take this as a look at tgwdlm like it's a stand-alone piece.

these guys are supposed to all be 'individuals' on one level, but also 'appendages of a much larger organism'. there's a little too much individualism and fracturing to be cohesive enough to do that I feel. the hive to me is not an infallible, unstoppable force, in fact, every human it takes over only brings it closer to understanding us. so that's maybe a slight positive note??? idk ?! I just have lots of thoughts and feelings abt this musical even if this doesn't make sense I'm proud i wrote it down hehe.