#(this is subtweeting a book i read a couple years ago

[queenlua]

there's a lot of (often reasonable) dunking on STEMlords who cringily bloviate on humanities-ish topics about which they know very little

but we can agree there's definitely plenty of cringe to go around, right. sometimes i gotta read an Acclaimed Novel by someone whose net understanding of some STEM-y topic is "they read an XKCD comic about it once" & now they're making it like a whole Theme™ in their book and oof augh ugh now i'm taking poison damage at a per-word rate

[awrldalone]

24th October 2020, 8.36pm

Perhaps I should start writing earlier in the day, when the gloom of night ha snot taken over me yet. I get more depressed at night, it’s also when bad thoughts storm me like a flock of black birds attacking.

Saturdays are always calm. If I do not open Instagram to see what others are doing they can even be nice, or peaceful. Nowadays, of course, people do not go out as often, so I tend to compare my boring life less to their slightly-more-interesting-but-still-uneventful life.

Today I woke up late. Eleven twenty two, I checked the time on my phone because I had fallen asleep next to it. Yesterday I told this weirdo I was talking to that their behaviour was getting toxic and unacceptable. They unfollowed me and childishly subtweeted me a couple of times. I am sure they will get over it.

I translated some latin today, Cicero again. It was a passage from the Orationes in Catilinam. We are studying them in class, and next week I will probably be tested on them. I like how Cicerone writes. It makes sense, it’s smooth and linear. But at the same time I hate it. It’s complex, special, you can tell it is beautiful but at the same time it is so hard to translate. I need to practice more, but I am not sure I will have the time. Maybe I should just translate a little passage, just a few lines, every night when I get back from school.

This afternoon, I went out with my family. It’s common for my parents to walk around in the city center, they go every weekend. I used to go with them all the time, when I was little, but now it’s a rare occasion. I went to the shops and i got a new jacket. There were sales, so I got it for cheap. It’s nice and warm and a deep dark green that reminds me of trees.

Then, my father and I went to an independent book store. It just opened, so I hope it does well, considering covid-19, the threat of a new lockdown, and the steady decrease in interest in books. 

It was in a not so respectable part of our town, but the store was really cute. The walls were a warm yellow, and jazz music was playing from a turntable. The owner, a man his 30s who dropped out at his third year of university, had curly black hair. He was charming, and he helped me find a poetry book to read. I got a bind-up of Let Us Compare Mythologies and The Spice-Box of Earth, by Leonard Cohen. I have never heard of him, but two summers ago I visited a photography exhibition by Lynn Cohen, who is completely unaffiliated with the poet.

I liked how tall the librarian was. He sounded kind and attentive, excited and warm while talking about a book. I think I’ll go buy other books there, just to support him. If they will put everyone in quarantine again, I will definitely purchase a few books before he has to close, so that I will have things to read for a while.

-c.

[ivyanderscn]

COURTNEY EATON   ,   CIS FEMALE   ,   SHE/HER         →         according   to   the   school   records   ,   IVY HAEATA ANDERSON   has   been   attending   sacred   heart   for   the   past   three years   .   i   last   saw   them   hanging   around   the john bracken library   ;   i   think   they   were   writing poetry in a leather-bound notebook   .   at   twenty one   years   old   ,   ivy   has   been   studying   english literature  and   get   this   ,   i   heard   that   she roams the tunnels when plagued by insomnia in the dead of night   —   figure   it’s   true   ?   everyone   around   here   always   associates   them   with   faded photographs with illegible writing on the back, shaky hands clutching a bouquet of wilted flowers, and the soft sound of rain hitting the roof   .   in   the   time   since   these   strange   happenings   ,   they   have   encountered   unexplained   occurrences    .         (   written   by   rose   ,   23   ,   she/her   ,   est   )

hello lovelies!! my name is rose and apparently i like plant names because this is ivy! i’m super excited to be here. like this and i’ll hit you up to plot!! (or you can dm me, my discord is scoops troops#4933)

tw for death, bullying

- ivy grew up in kaikoura, new zealand. her mother was also raised in kaikoura, while her father was from england. they met as students at the university of canterbury. they had always known that after they graduated, he would go back to the uk, but what they hadn’t planned on was her mother becoming pregnant with ivy. (it was very scandalous, especially given that this was 1952). he had a promising job offer back in england so he left, leaving ivy’s mother and grandmother to raise her. she had a happy childhood in a beautiful beachside town, raised by two women she loved and admired. ivy did go to england every year to spend the summer with her father, and while she didn’t have the best relationship with him, she knew he loved her in his own way.

- when ivy was 11, her mom died. it was extremely devastating for both her and her grandmother. ivy had always been shy, but the loss made her retreat even further into herself. she had always loved reading, and after her mother’s death books became her best friends. she began reading at an advanced level and always had her nose in a book. it wasn’t long before she started writing, too, mostly journaling but also short stories and poetry (the kind of stuff she looks back on now and cringes, but was decent for an 11 year old). a couple years after her mother died, ivy found a box filled with dozens of her mother’s journals. she’s read every page at least five times, and sometimes will look through them to see what her mother was doing on that day however many years ago. they helped ivy feel close to her mom, and the profound impact that they had on her inspired her to become a writer.

- ivy’s shyness made her kind of an easy target in terms of bullying, a seemingly never-ending stream of insults and name calling, and for a long time she just took it because she didn’t think there was any other way to deal with it. but one day when she was in high school, some boys said some… less than savory things about her mom (small town, young single mother, people suck, etc. etc.) and she flipped out. like all of this anger that even ivy didn’t know was bubbling under the surface just kind of exploded. it was so shocking to people, for this sweet, quiet girl to become so loud and angry, that they found it amusing and the bullying got worse. 

- her grandmother was her rock, but she decided she wanted to get as far away from there as she could, and her father suggested she look at universities in the uk. ivy wasn’t sure what drew her to sacred heart, but it just felt like the place she was supposed to be.

- given how shy ivy is, she’s not always the easiest to get to know and she doesn’t have a lot of friends. she’s definitely a wallflower type (wow my subconscious really named this wallflower after a plant that grows on walls, idk how to feel about this lsakdjfhsldkfjhsd) and she typically lets other people take the lead in conversations. she comes across as mousy, in a sweet sort of way. but for the people who actually do get to know her, she’s an extremely kind and loyal person. she’s really passionate about literature and art and music and history and if you’re talking about any of that? all of a sudden she won’t shut up. she doesn’t handle strong emotions well, like she definitely happy cries. and angry cries. and tired cries. basically she cries a lot. her anger is a lot more in check than it was when she was a teenager, but if she feels like someone or something she cares about has been disrespected she will lash out quite suddenly. (and then go cry about it). she’s kind of a mess, emotionally speaking, the one thing that really helps her handle that is writing about her feelings, and she journals religiously. 

- a few quick headcanons: she listens to music like 92% of the time and you can thank her dad for a deep love of britpop and jazz. she loves baking and if she has access to an oven she’ll probably give you cookies on a regular basis. she’s left handed and the side of her hand is always covered in ink smudges. she’ll do stupid things because she thinks it will be good inspiration for a story, when in reality, she’s just being stupid. she has terrible insomnia and sometimes reads encyclopedias to try to fall asleep. she likes to hide behind a camera and take pictures of other people to avoid having pictures taken of her. cannot sing to save her life. loves black coffee and cigarettes and is in denial that beatniks aren’t cool anymore. is pretty much always carrying around a book. scribbles in the margins of everything. her new zealand accent is noticeable but not thick, and is gradually fading the longer she’s in the uk. 

and more aesthetics because it was really hard to narrow down to three: dirt underneath your fingernails, tear-stained cheeks, getting lost in a museum, messy hair, always being cold, stargazing, oversized wool sweaters, preferring to listen rather than speak, homesickness.

wanted connections:

ride or die!!, fairly self-explanatory, someone she can be 100% herself around and in exchange for their love and friendship she’d, you know,  die for them

close friends, pretty much the same thing??

someone she knew from her summers in england!! (i’m pretending that new zealand has their extended school break during the northern hemisphere summer ok)

roommate, i don’t know which would be better, them getting along or them hating each other

enemy/annoyance, it’s not exactly easy to piss her off but once you do she is pissed

writing buddies?? like they share their work with each other and give notes and stuff, maybe in some sort of club?

some sort of mentor? a lit professor would be great but really anyone who teaches the arts/humanities, bonus points for cultists

a professor who hates her, she’s such a goody goody that would really kill her

bad boy meets good girl, honestly i’m a sucker for this trope, i love mess what can i say

really any kind of opposites attract situation, romantic or platonic

flirtationship, she’s really not good at being upfront about how she feels but maybe she’ll write something that’s the poetry version of subtweeting about them, she’s angsty as fuck

exes, just more mess and angst please and thank you

idk if this is too sadistic but maybe the wrong corner of a love triangle? like, the corner that gets left behind when the triangle becomes a line (i can’t do geometry analogies i’m sorry) just a thought because...mess

literally anything, i’m not picky, i want it all

[purplesurveys]

334

Have you ever read the Hunger Games series? No, I was never into the series. I did watch the first movie and fairly enjoyed it. When was the last time you ran into something? As clumsy as I am, I don’t remember tripping onto anything recently. Do you enjoy dressing up? Not really. Do you live in the city or a rural area? City. I prefer it that way. Would you say you have a sense of style? I guess? I get good comments on my outfits most days so that must mean I’m doing something right.

What's your biggest fear? It changes everyday. For today, it’s knives. Have you ever been bitten by a wild animal? No. That’s a big fear of mine too. Are you close to any of your cousins? Yes, I’m close to one of them and I treat him as an older brother. I used to be super close to my cousins on my dad’s side, but since we gradually moved farther and farther away from each other, the closeness faded and we don’t give each other anything more than hi’s whenever we come over to see their family. I wish we could change that soon :( Have you ever been lost in the woods? No, that’s the very reason why I don’t walk around in the woods. Where did you last travel? I went to Nasugbu if that counts as traveling. Do you enjoy driving? If I’m not stuck in traffic for 3/4 of the ride then yes. Unfortunately that’s the case in Metro Manila. What song did you last listen to? APESHIT by Beyonce and Jay-Z. If you have a job, how often do you work? No work, just university life for the next two years. What time do you normally go to sleep at night? It differs every night. There are nights I could stay up till 1 AM, some other times I’d rather be in bed by 9:30. Do you watch a lot of movies? I used to. I haven’t found the enthusiasm to watch new movies recently. Do you like Tom Petty? I don’t really have any comment? Would you rather have snow or rain? I love both. Do you own a lot of sweaters? No, that’s not necessary here. A couple of sweaters is fine. Have you ever tried rock-climbing? Like once. Ever ridden in a police car? Nope. Favorite decade of music? I don’t have a favorite decade.  Have any of your best friends been your best friend longer than a year? Both of my best friends have been around for more than five years. Even Sofie, even though I’ve drifted away from her already. Ever witnessed a murder? No and I hope to god that’s something I never have to go through. Do you care what people think of you? No, unless I look up to you. Does your room have a ceiling fan? I don’t believe that ceiling fans actually work, so no. Would you consider yourself poised? Most of the time. But when I get jumpy it’s really bad. Have you ever tried blogging? Yes. I never lasted more than four entries on every blog I’ve ever made my whole life, and I made a fuckton of Blogspots, LiveJournals, and Wordpresses. I do last on microblogging though, manifested by my being on Tumblr since 2010. Favorite television channel? I don’t use the television for cable TV anymore... Have you ever lied under oath? No. I’ve never been under oath. What are your religious views? None. Are you a romantic person? I am, but I think I would be so much more romantic if I had more money. My love language for other people is material things; that being said, I loooove spoiling the people I love because they deserve everything. When did you last change your bed sheets? A couple of weeks ago. Would you consider yourself a flirt? As a demisexual, the concept of flirting makes me uncomfortable, so no. At what age do you plan to be married? 27. I wanted it to be 25, but Gabie freaked out at how early it was so we agreed on 27. Do you eat a lot of junk food? Yes I love junk food. When did you last go on vacation? Last April. Are you resilient? Some situations. I’m easy to disappoint sometimes too though. Have you ever failed a subject before? I’ve never failed one in college and I don’t plan to. I cared less in high school so I did fail geometry, chemistry, and advanced algebra. Didn’t keep me from being admitted into the top university in the country though ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ If so, what was the class? ^ Mentioned it all there. I don’t remember if I also failed calculus or not. Do you wear more bright or dull colors? Dull. Do you know anyone who has attempted suicide? Yes, and I know people who have succeeded. It’s a sad reality. What's your favorite quote? I don’t have one. Would you consider yourself mature? I guess, but I have my petty moments too. How many clocks are in your house? Two. There’s one in the dining room and the other one is on our cable provider’s set top box. Do you play any sports? Table tennis. Have you ever been injured in a car accident? Nope.

If you could be anywhere in the world right now, where would you be? Somewhere with snow and zero sun. Have you ever had highlights in your hair? Nope, not a fan. Favorite fast food restaurant? Jollibee. In what country were you born? The Philippines. Are your eyes more than one color? No, they’ve been dark brown for the last 20 years. Have you ever caught something on fire? I don’t think so? Hahahaha I’m scared of fire so I think I’ve been extra careful this whole time. What would you consider your biggest flaw? I hate criticism unless it’s told to me super super super SUPER gently. What do you think your best quality is? I’m really good at reading people so it’s easier to understand them and much easier to detect problems. Do you enjoy listening to others' problems? I don’t enjoy listening to someone who’s, say, talking to me about parental abuse, but I do become the dump for my friends’ problems regularly and it at least makes me happy knowing I’m being a good friend from that. Do you keep any plants in your house? My mom keeps the plants. I don’t. What is your mother's occupation? She works at a 5-star hotel as some sort of executive secretary or something. Her titles are always long so I don’t bother to know anymore. Do any of your friends like your musical style? I don’t share my music with my friends. What are you most looking forward to? Friday because this week is going to be shit. What was your favorite television show as a child? Hi-5 was my shit. Are you afraid of insects? Yep. Are you cold-natured? Most of the time. How old were you when you got your first pet? I was probablyyyy 5-6 when we got our first goldfish. Goldfish would remain our staple pet for the next 5 years. Did you/do you enjoy high school? I enjoyed the friends part of it. I had a REALLY great time in high school when it came to my friends; I was lucky to have found a home in my friend group before school ended. I hated everything else about it. Most of the teachers, the close-mindedness, the Catholic education, the unnecessary calculus, blegh. What would you say was your favorite age? Year 16 was unbelievably kind to me. What annoys you most about social networking? It’s a tie between so many people who subtweet and so many people who share their privileged, expensive, flashy-ass lives. Are you the center of attention most of the time? No I hate that. What are you currently reading? Guess what!!! I can finally answer this question!!!!! Gabie bought me AJ Lee’s Crazy Is My Superpower when we saw it at a bookstore while on a date. It’s a super rare find as it’s never in any store, so the second I saw it she swiped it off the shelf and handed it to the cashier. I’m like 30 pages away from finishing it, so I also started on Chris Jericho’s A Lion’s Tale: Around the World in Spandex. Both are wrestling autobiographies, which at the end of the day is my favorite genre of books. When did you last go to the library? Last Wednesday because I needed to get something printed. Are you ill at the moment? Nope. Never am. Do people tease you about anything? Yeah my orgmates impersonate me a lot. How late did you stay up last night and why? 12 AM because I had been reading Jericho’s book. Have you ever written poetry? Only when we had to pass a poem assignment in high school. I hate poetry and only tolerate it when my girlfriend reads a poem out loud to me. Curtains or shades? Shades. It’s what a lot of houses here use. How many people have you spoken to in the last hour? Just my mom. Do you tend to text a lot? I text Gab a lot. Ever lost a great best friend? Yeah. Sofie was pretty solid during the time we were inseparable, but I don’t know...it just dawned on me one day that we have drastically different personalities, and not in the opposites-attract way. Beyond our shared love for Audrey Hepburn, our personalities were worlds, worlds apart. I just knew it was going to have to stop somewhere. She was amazing though. At the end of the day I don’t think about her or miss her a lot, so I think that just proved my point. What is your favorite kind of flower? Whatever flower my girlfriend gives me. How tall are you? I’d say a little below 5′2″. Do you own any guns? Nope. What would you say is your favorite book of all-time? I haven’t christened a book with that title. Do you think you're living a good life? I’m not gonna deny the fact that I am privileged in a lot of aspects. But mental health destructs a lot of that. It’s what’s keeping me from having a completely good life. What's your least favorite part of the day? The morning. Are you an over-achiever? Nah, just an achiever. Have you ever won an award for a speech? No. Do you tend to curse a lot? I do. Have you ever played on the Ouija board? No but I’ve always wanted to! But only with the lights on and in broad daylight. Do you sleepwalk? I did it once when I was 9. Never happened again. Have you ever slept on the floor before? Many times. Are you a fan of public displays of affection? Only between LGBT couples hahaha. When did you last attend a yard sale? Years ago? I don’t really go. Do you wish your life were simpler or more interesting? Interesting. I’m always waiting for something exciting. What goals do you wish to accomplish tomorrow? Get through my class without breaking down. Repeat for the next four days. When is your birthday? April 21st. Which is worse: going blind or deaf? I dunno, that isn’t really a competition and shouldn’t be treated as such. What was the best part of today? Welp it’s 7:42 AM so it’s too soon to tell; but right now I do have the time to finally take surveys again so there’s that. Do you attempt to stay away from drama? I like sipping the tea, but I don’t mix the tea myself. What liquid did you last drink? Water. I only ever drink water... Do you ever prefer to be alone? Some times. Occasionally I’d yearn for the presence of friends too. Have you ever had a deadly animal as a pet? No. Favorite Disney movie? Tangled or Toy Story. Have you ever been to the beach? Of course, but it’s been two months since I last went. :(  If you have, how many times have you been? Way too many times. I live in an archipelago so beaches are pretty accessible. What was your dream occupation at age ten? My old Grade 4 assignments would say that at 10, I wanted to be a writer. Are you terrified at the idea of weight-gain? No. In fact I’m really looking to gain weight in the next few years because I find myself way too skinny. I can’t wear a lot of clothes because of it; I have had to give away pretty culottes to my sister, who actually weighs like a normal person. Do you drink a lot of water? Sure; I love water. Does your room have carpet or hard-wood floors? Hardwood. Philippine houses never do carpet. Do you take naps daily? As much as I can. Not daily because I’m always busy during the day. Do you plan on traveling this spring or summer? My family’s travel schedule is unconventional since we always plan our travels only for when my dad is home, so that we’re complete. That said, we don’t always book trips strictly during the summer. Depending on when he comes back, we can travel right smack in the middle of the school year, a day before my exams, etc. Do you know anyone who is colorblind? I don’t think so. Have you ever been a teacher's pet? I sort of have. I wanted to be my prof’s favorite in his art studies class because I heard he didn’t give 1.00′s (which is the highest grade you get in my uni). So I recited a lot, interpreted paintings even though I had no clue what I was saying, and had a memorized speech for our big Powerpoint presentation requirement. Ended the class with a 1.00. What is your absolute favorite hobby? Going to museums. How many times a day do you brush your teeth? Once or twice. Ever been to a tanning bed before? I don’t need that. 107,000,000 Filipinos don’t need tanning beds. Are you satisfied with your financial stability? I am satisfied with my *family’s financial stability. I don’t make money myself yet. Who is your favorite actor/actress? Kate Winslet and Kristen Stewart. Do you model your life after anything? No. What's the meanest thing you've ever said to someone? I’ve never gone over the edge with anyone because I know exactly how it feels to be told anything hurtful. Do you ever accidentally talk to inanimate objects? Yeah I say sorry to stuff when I bump into them. What's your favorite flavor of ice cream? Cookies and cream, or anything with cookie or brownie chunks. Have you ever kissed someone of the same gender? That’s sort of the dynamic of my relationship. If you could, would you have a pen pal? No. What color are the pants you're wearing? Brown, but they’re shorts. Have you ever had a stalker? Nope. What is your life philosophy? You don’t have to be blood to be family. Who last sent you a goodnight text message? My girlfriend, AKA the only person who sends me those things. Do you own any clothes that are your favorite color? Yes for black, none for pink. Have you ever been in a hot tub before? Sure. What's your favorite comedy movie? It’s not limited to comedy, but The Proposal.

In which year were you born? 1998.