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the-college-of-whispers · 3 years ago

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Queer Characters in the Elder Scrolls Series

If you’re anything like me (an aro-ace nonbinary person), you may feel disconnected from mythological figures from our world because the cultures they come from don’t have the same terms we use today. So, like me, you may have turned to pop culture entities to see yourself in.

In-Game Lore

In the Morrowind game, Crassius Curio flirts with the Nerevarine regardless of their gender.

In Oblivion, a lot of characters have the in-game models of one gender but are referred to with the other set of pronouns in-game, like City-Swimmer, Deetsan, Dumag gro-Bonk (who was originally designed as a woman but was changed into a man and also flirts with the Hero of Kvatch regardless of their gender), and Mach-Na.

This "different model to pronouns" thing also follows through to Skyrim, with Ilas-Tei. Marriage-eligible characters in this game can be married regardless of whatever genders the character and the Last Dragonborn are. Similarly, Serana lightly flirts with the Last Dragonborn regardless of gender.

In Online, Alchemy is a canon trans woman and Snaehild is also trans (just not explicitly so). The characters Cres and Gazmod the Collector are referred to by they/them pronouns exclusively. Online also features many gay, lesbian, bi- or pansexual characters, including at least two poly relationships.

Some of the Aedra vary in gender presentation in stories across various pantheons.

Khenarthi, the Khajiiti deity of the winds and sky (possibly also Kynareth, Kyne, and Kin) is referred to by both he/him and she/her.

Tava, the Lady of the Air, the Bird God, and the aspect of Kynareth in the Redguard Pantheon, is also sometimes referred to as he/him instead of she/her.

Y'ffre, aka Jephre (Aldmeri) or Y'ffer (Khajiiti), is the Bosmeri spirit of the "now" and is variously referred to as male and female.

The Daedric Princes are beyond mortal comprehensions of "gender" altogether but usually pick just one to present as, but there are exceptions.

Boethiah uses both he/him and she/her across different games, but when talking about her relationship with Mephala, Boethiah is only ever referred to with she/her pronouns.

Malacath is typically depicted as a man but appeared in a novel as an Altmer woman as a disguise.

Mephala is literally called the "Androgyne" and referred to as both a man and a woman, but when talking about her relationship with Boethiah, Mephala is only ever referred to with she/her pronouns.

Molag Bal is usually referred to with he/him pronouns but is referred to with she/her pronouns in the book Invocation of Azura by Sigillah Parate.

Additionally, Vivec is intersexed and usually referred to with he/him pronouns, but sometimes she/her is used. He is also described as being able to take on a female form.

Argonians can change their entire being via the Hist, up to and including gender. Their gender presentation is assigned based on how much they lick the Hist tree as adolescents, but many change genders later in their lives.

Pop Culture Witchcraft

As with a lot of deities, you could probably invoke an Aedra or Daedra for help in a gender-affirmation spell (or a same-sex love spell with the help of Boethiah and Mephala).

Dragon Shouts can also be crafted to help with gender dysphoria, confidence in who you want to be, help with coming out, stuff like that. I've even crafted two of my own, which I will link in the sources.

Anything you can think that includes magic and an element of yourself can be altered to include your identity, if you so wish for it to be there.

Sources

"General: Gender and Sexual Diversity" on the Unofficial Elder Scrolls Pages: https://en.uesp.net/wiki/General:Gender_and_Sexual_Diversity

"LGBTQ+" on the Elder Scrolls Wiki: https://elderscrolls.fandom.com/wiki/LGBTQ%2B

"Invocation of Azura" by Sigillah Parate (an in-game author), reformatted by myself with a little commentary: https://the-college-of-whispers.tumblr.com/post/662061066016227328/invocation-of-azura

"Transmasc & Transfem Body Dysphoria Relief Shouts" by @the-college-of-whispers on Tumblr: https://jasper-grimoire.tumblr.com/post/666248602641891328

The queer section tag on my personal online grimoire, @jasper-grimoire: https://jasper-grimoire.tumblr.com/tagged/section%3A-queer

#the elder scrolls #elder scrolls witchcraft #elder scrolls paganism #jasper post #in-game lore #kynareth #y'ffre #boethiah #malacath #mephala #molag bal #vivec #thu'um #spells #deities and worship #daedric princes #the aedra

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hamliet · 4 years ago

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when does a relationship become queerbaiting? theres a book that i really like and the 2 male leads characters have a lot of storylines and arcs where they get closer and i think some of the tropes used can be similar to the typical romantic tropes, neither of them end up with anyone at the end of the story since its more about found family and the long journey the whole cast goes through. they even get shipped by another character as a running gag. personally i always saw it as being open to interpretation but recently the revised edition of the original novel came out and there were several lines those 2 characters had about each other that were kinda toned down, i didnt think much of it but i saw a post about how it was clearly baiting and the author was being homophobic for toning it down. i didnt think it counted as baiting since as far as i know, the novel was never advertised as anything with romance and the author never pretended they were gonna end up together. i am definitely a little weirded out by the decision to change those specific lines but a lot of the story stayed the same, including a lot about their relationship so idk what to think.

i guess im more confused on if it counts as baiting, or even substext??

Sooooo I am not the best person to ask about this, because I’m a cis woman who has thus far in life only been attracted in a romantic sense to cis men. I can talk a bit about baiting as a general concept in fiction, but you should definitely take it with some grains of salt.

Baiting, for me, is like deliberately playing up an aspect writers have no intention on delivering on. Usually this is done for ratings, to tease fans, fanservice, etc, but without payoff, it is just bad writing. Red herrings are good in writing, but only can be successfully used if the actual result is more satisfying than the herring. This applies to writing in general, not just to romantic ships. However, when the baiting involves historically underrepresented groups for no reason other than to get fans to spend money consuming the story, I think we can all agree that becomes something more grotesque than just bad writing: it’s insensitive, socially irresponsible, frankly hurtful.

Some common examples are Bridgerton which has a gay character, who is extremely minor, yet they played up this character in advertising. Also, Rizzoli and Isles I think actually had its producers mention deliberately playing up the lesbian subtext to hook the audience without ever intending on following through.

That said, context also matters. Like, there are aspects of the culture of the work’s author, the target audience, and such that come into play here also (so like, romantic tropes differ by culture. For example, enemies to lovers is common in Asian stories but less in the west, and the “girl who pursues a guy” is extremely common in Japanese shonen in particular, while it is very much a cringe trope that almost never results in romance in American fiction. So if a writer reads, say, tropes that are common in America into a Japanese work and says it’s baiting, that’s quite possibly not the intent even if it may have been the experience of the reader. So even if there was no intent, there can still be hurt, and that hurt can be real, if that makes sense.

The definition of what constitutes ‘baiting’ varies. I do think that, in true Tumblr fashion, the term gets thrown around a lot and loses its intended meaning, or is so rigidly defined that creators can meet the letter of the “not a bait” requirement while ignoring the spirit of it.

To start with the latter: regarding something hitting the letter of what most wouldn’t consider baiting yet not really the spirit, let’s look at The Rise of Skywalker. This movie had a genuine lesbian kiss in it... between two characters we’d never seen more than a glimpse of while others are celebrating around them. Since it has a kiss, it’s not baiting, right? Well... the director deliberately said in the lead-up to the film that he included it because he “wanted LGBT people to see themselves in the film.” If “see yourselves in the film” is like a nanosecond of background, then, like... idk. Baiting or not, it feels icky, and I know some people consider it baiting and some don’t even if they don’t like, love that representation. But I think this is more queerbaiting than like, Nobara and Maki, who don’t have explicit romantic coding.

Going back to the former, in terms of ‘queerbaiting’ losing its intended meaning... I think there are a lot of really poorly written romantic ships out there, often het, while a lot of same-gender relationships are really well written regardless of whether there’s romantic coding within the text. The main emotional energy in stories with 90% male characters (as frankly many if not most stories are, great job world) is probably between two men. There’s just so much more potential with well-written characters who share a lot of screen time, so of course people are going to ship them. In my opinion, this does not inherently make it baiting, but it certainly creates an environment that lends itself to baiting even if the writers aren’t intending to do this.

Like, you could say the main emotional energy in BNHA is Bakugou and Deku. However, Bakudeku is 100% not queerbaiting. It’ll never be canon romantically (I don’t even ship it lol). There has been nothing to imply romance between them even if the main emotional message can be seen in their development. Deku/Ochaco is likely to be canon, but there is a significant lack of genuine emotional energy between them (the story’s plots and themes don’t coalesce around their relationship), so it’s probably going to feel forced. In contrast, Naruto/Sasuke had an actual kiss in canon, which while played for laughs is a lot more direct romantic coding than anything between Bakugou/Deku. I actually don’t think the majority of Narusasu is baiting, but I definitely think that one moment in chapter like 3 was really poor fanservice for yaoi fans, and has not aged well at all.

It is also the case that fans can confuse headcanons with what is actually in the text, and that just never ends well. For example, Clover and Qrow’s ship in RWBY: a lot of people read Clover as gay, which led to “bury your gays” outrage when he died. A member of the crew stated explicitly they had never intended for Clover to be a love interest for Qrow, and truthfully here was nothing strictly romantic in their relationship--nothing like a kiss or a declaration of love or a parallel to another romantic couple. Hence, I don’t personally consider it queerbaiting or bury your gays, but a lot of fans felt that it was and their pain is legitimate even if I think textually the argument isn’t there. The one thing I do think is true about this in particular is that there was also no strict platonic coding, which encourages headcanons. Clear writing, yo. It can help.

Note the word “can” not “will,” because strict platonic coding doesn’t always fix things, either. In what was probably a reaction to the outrage over Clover’s death, you had extremely blatant platonic coding of Ruby and Penny’s relationship this season leading up to Penny’s death. Ruby refers to Penny as “our friend” three different times, wherein “friend” sends a platonic message and “our” sends an even stronger message that it’s not about the two of them despite the fact that their friendship is one of the sweetest and most interesting in the show. A lingering Ruby-Penny hug then is followed by a lingering Penny-Weiss hug, then Yang, then Blake, etc. The writers went out of their way to hit people over the head with “platonic” and yet they have still gotten accusations of bury your gays and queerbaiting because people will see what they want to see in a story.

Seeing what you want to see in a story also isn’t inherently bad. People who are underrepresented are going to have to read themselves into stories because Lord knows writers ain’t incorporating them well enough if at all. It’s why “Mary Sues” are common in fanfiction, which is primarily written by people who are not straight white men: because where the hell else are we to see ourselves in fiction? So essentially the macrocosm of culture creates this problem, both in terms of baiting and the misuse of the term, and the only fix is a shit ton more good representation.

#ask hamliet #writing stuff #Anonymous

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girlsbtrs · 4 years ago

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Girls Behind The Rock Show x Feminin Ror International Transgender Visibility Day

Written by April Bredael.

At Girls Behind The Rock Show and Feminin Ror, we value and support individuals of all identities. We value diversity, inclusion, and support for people being their authentic selves. Today, March 31st is International Transgender Visibility Day. On this day we honor the progress our society has made, yet acknowledge the abundance of work that still needs to be done.

International Transgender Visibility Day celebrates transgender identities and raising awareness and education about discrimination faced by transgender individuals every day, as well as a celebration of their contributions to society.

Trans representation in the music industry is something we strive to recognize. Regardless of gender identity or sexual orientation, music is something that brings individuals together. Recognizing and celebrating our differences is what makes our industry stronger, and creates a more diverse and remarkable environment within the industry. Today, we will acknowledge our favorite transgender artists and their contributions to the music industry as well as providing resources in support of the LGBTQ+ community.

Cavetown, who has created success within music has been performing since 2013. At age 14, he broke barriers with his whole-hearted optimism and yearning for life that was encapsulated within his music and a success with his fans. In 2018, he released his debut full length album, Lemon Boy which saw immediate success. After pursuing multiple sold out national and international tours, he has created an authentic bond with fans who gather as a community around his music and vision.

For more on Cavetown, visit his website here.

Kim Petras, who has been creating music since she was a teenager, has quickly taken the world by storm. The German artist found success with her single “Heart to Break” breaking into Top 40 radio. Petras has been a longtime advocate for transgender rights and states that “I’m super proud of being transgender, and I love the rest of the community,” she says. “The suicide rate is so ridiculously high, and it’s so difficult when you don’t have supportive parents. I want to be a good example.”

For more on Kim Petras, visit her website here.

SOPHIE, an influential Scottish producer, changed the music industry forever with her impact in only thirty four short years. In addition to SOPHIE’s work in the music production industry, SOPHIE was a long time advocate for trans rights. "Trans-ness is taking control to bring your body more in line with your soul and spirit so the two aren't fighting against each other and struggling to survive," SOPHIE shared. "On this earth, it's that you can get closer to how you feel your true essence is without the societal pressures of having to fulfill certain traditional roles based on gender." SOPHIE’s pioneered production visions and immense work for inclusion within the music industry changed the music scene forever and paved the way for future queer individuals pursuing music.

You can visits SOPHIE’s website here.

Shea Diamond, who specializes in soul and R&B has had a different break into the music industry from many others. As a trans woman of color, Diamond has faced adversity throughout her entire life. While incarcerated for an attempted bank robbery to pay for gender reassignment surgery, she wrote her hit track “I Am Her.” While in prison, Diamond experienced humiliation, isolation, and misgendering as punishments. She shares that "To be a 40-year-old woman, a trans woman, to make it to that age it's not really heard of. We get killed off before we're 25,” and that “People don't want to see the struggle of what it takes for a trans woman to survive. It's more comfortable for people — for everybody now — for entertainment purposes to see a drag queen. That's a person who can take it off. The trans experience is a person who isn't doing it for entertainment purposes. Everything this person does is for survival. What does survival look like? It looks like [me]." Because of her experiences, Diamond is a huge advocate for transgender rights and continues the fight for equality.

For more on Shea Diamond, visit her website here.

Lucas Silveira, of The Cliks, broke barriers as the first transgender man to sign with a major record label. He shares that “Something that I would like to do is to bring some aspect of normalcy to people like me," Silveira stated, "We're a very, very diverse community — I've never met two transgender people who've had the same experience." Since coming out, The Cliks have released several popular tracks including “Complicated,” “Dirty King,” and “Oh Yeah.”

For more on Lucas Silveira and The Clicks, visit their website here.

While acknowledging the success of the above individuals and more, we must continue to spark advocacy for change and inclusion in the fight for equality. Although dedicated as a day of visibility for the transgender community on March 31st, it is important to continue spreading visibility every day.

A playlist of transgender artists can be found here.

LGBTQ+ Resources

The Trevor Project: A national 24-hour, toll free confidential suicide hotline for LGBTQ youth.

GLAAD: A dynamic media force, GLAAD tackles tough issues to shape the narrative and provoke dialogue that leads to cultural change.

National Center for Transgender Equality: advocates to change policies and society to increase understanding and acceptance of transgender people.

The Safe Zone: a helpful resource in creating LGBTQ+/Ally trainings and workshops.

Human Rights Campaign: focuses on equality for all, not just some. Leading the way in the fight for LGBT inclusion and equality.

Gender Spectrum: Resources for you or others to promote education on the gender spectrum and gender identity.

GLSEN: GLSEN works to ensure that LGBTQ students are able to learn and grow in a school environment free from bullying and harassment.

It Gets Better Project: their mission is to uplift, empower, and connect lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, and LGBTQ+ youth around the globe.

Lambda Legal: national organization committed to achieving full recognition of the civil rights for the LGBTQ+ community.

#april bredael

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setabane · 4 years ago

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The Beauty of Queer Intimacy and Love: The Dynamics of Femme Women loving Women (WLW) Relationships

This captivating series maneuvers around the beauty of everyday queer life and the documentation of queer love (platonic, romantic and of-self). A dialogue that contains a cinematography-focused visual aesthetic on tender and gentle moments with main inspirations from Clifford Prince King, Ryan McGinley and Ryan Pfluger.

Words: Cassim Cassim

There is a heavy stigmatism behind the word femme in its essence, especially when you coalesce and meld it with being queer. There is a shift in conflict whenever you are a queer femme identifying person, a shift that diverts hate and prejudice from the cis hetero community to the queer community. In the gay community, there is creation of internalized homophobia, which is known as femphobia, femme presenting queer men have been historically ostracized and ridiculed for presenting too girly or too feminine. Whereas in the lesbian community, there is an ambiguous reaction and opinion towards femme presenting queer women. There is a heavy dig into the existence of queer women, especially queer femme women who love other women.

Queer femme women must face a challenge amongst the heterosexual agenda and feeding into an idea that they must feed themselves into compulsory and performative ‘bisexuality’ all to praise the needs of men. Usually, women who are in femme relationships fall prey to this cage of men belittling their relationships by sexualizing them and praising their union because it is “sexy”, but God forbid a relationship between a butch queer woman and a femme queer woman, sensuality between them becomes “sick” and “cruel”. It widens the range of behavior considered acceptable from men in heterosexual intercourse, behavior which reiteratively strips women of their autonomy, dignity, and sexual potential, including the potential of loving and being loved by women in mutuality and integrity.

Femme to femme relationships in women are part of the forefront yet have never been seen as a redefinition of a generational idea of what queer love looks like. Without denigrating the idea that a wlw queer relationship is between butch and femme, it assumably feeds into the base idea that it belongs into a system of gender, the man and the woman, the provider and the receiver, simply because both expressions are dichotomic. It is rather cathartic knowing that now we don’t have a prominent base idea of what a queer relationship looks like or should look like, and that’s what makes queer relationships unique and splendiferous. This last article in the last series is to highlight the beauty of queer relationships, in all forms, and the subversion of the patriarchy by painting a soft and delegate form of femininity and queer intimacy between 2 femme women. SETABANE had an interview with 2 queer femme presenting woman discussing their idea of intimacy between women and their experiences with love and intimacy.

1. What is your definition of intimacy?

(J) My definition of intimacy is where me and my partner are together and we’re both tapping into each other’s emotional and mental inclination/state. It could be through just a casual conversation maybe about how your day really was or a deep conversation about the things you want for yourself or for the both of us. Allowing your partner to get in touch with your emotional being is the most intimate you can ever be with him/her (in my opinion). With physical intimacy, it’s more to do with being so comfortable with each other’s presence, their touch, having a good time and not involving sex. The latter on the other hand isn’t my way of showing intimacy.

(C) Intimacy to me is defined as the complete acceptance of oneself and of other people. It’s being comfortable in my body and my spirit to share a bond with most importantly myself and then another person.

2. What is your idea of romanticism?

(J) It’s definitely doing something, could be small or big, for my partner and not expecting anything in return, just making my partner feel so special. I could be doing whatever it is I’m doing out of love or admiration or for the fun of it. It also keeps the relationship alive, just little surprises here and there. Affirming your partner all the time counts too, as well as giving them your time, doing things out of the ordinary, basically being spontaneous.

(C) Being aware of my own wants and needs and/or as well as my partners. Words or actions based off this form the base of the romantic aspect in any relationship.

3. What’s one thing you love about being queer?

(J) I’d like to think it’s how I learn something all the time about being queer and the queer community. There’s so much to being queer that it just blows my mind sometimes. Anything thing is the support that comes from the queer community. It’s so overwhelming in a good way. It’s just incredible to see it and feel it.

(C) The ability to be my most authentic self. The community as well. There is an abundance of love and generosity. We all share a commonality yet embrace individualism to the fullest.

4. Is queer expression important to you?

(J) For me, I really do not think too much about how I express myself physically that is. I absolutely adore when queer people express themselves wholeheartedly that’s for sure, but for me, it never really wasn’t that important.

(C) Queer expression is vital. Without it, embracing one's true self cannot happen. Being queer takes up a portion of who the person is, if it cannot be tapped into and explored by physical means, it is left untouched and dormant.

5. Do you feel prejudice/discrimination as a queer woman in Botswana?

(J) I personally haven’t really experienced/received that kind of energy from people, so I don’t think so. But for my fellow queer people, I’d like to think some have, especially trans, gay and bisexual men. They have it the hardest and it’s hard to witness that.

6. Do you believe in queer platonic love?

(J) Yeah, absolutely.

(C) Absolutely. Again, it’s the community. Friends come to be from sharing experiences and opinions, while accepting each other regardless of any differences. I don’t see why that cannot be for queer friendships. It can be one of the greatest friendships to ever have as a queer person.

7. What’s one advice you’d give to someone reading this?

(J) Don’t live up to people’s expectations of you. Live up to your expectations of you. Don’t be concerned about what other people think of you. Don’t focus on trying to prove to people your validation. And be kind, always. We live in such a cruel world and you can make it better by just being kind to the people around you.

(C) Study yourself. Expand your mind. Have some substance. We live in a world where distractions occupy our lives. But we weren’t put on this planet to become machines. Don’t lose your humanity, it’s the most beautiful thing you own. CREDITS:

PHOTOGRAPHY : @wenz_hd

EDITOR: @cxsside

MODELS: @jdee_ridge and @clarisapriyanka

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soloragoldsun · 4 years ago

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Pride Month Recommendations- Days 9-18

No, I didn’t forget this! I just haven’t had the strength to do long-ass posts of this nature. Hopefully, things will be better when I switch shifts at the end of the month.

Anyway, I’m going to go through my Steam Library for this list...

9. Angels with Scaly Wings by Radical Phi is a dating sim/mystery/sci-fi game where you can romance a dragon. As you can probably imagine, it is an ideal game for me. You are an ambassador from a dying Earth who has been sent through a portal to a world populated by sentient dragons. There, you uncover a series of murders and get close to certain dragons while trying to save their world and yours. The characters are very in-depth with largely tragic backstories. Get ready for some feels. Your character is referred to by they/them pronouns, leaving their gender open to your interpretation. You can develop a relationship with all five dragons, regardless. It’s a wonderful game with great worldbuilding and incredible characters!

10. Coming Out on Top by Obscurasoft is a game that I willingly purchased TWICE. The first time was when it was still in development, which I almost never do. Even when it was incomplete, I got an amazing experience from it! When I lost access to my old email and the game came out on Steam, I bought the completed version. The premise is simple in theory: You are a college senior who has just come out as gay, and can romance one of several guys over the course of the game. What makes this game stand out is the likeable characters, the zany settings you can find yourself in, and the hilarious dialogue! Each romance is unique, and even the non-romanceable side characters are memorable. It has good sex scenes, if that’s what you’re into, and you can even customize things like facial hair on your character and the bachelors. There are even mini-dates you can go on if you don’t feel like playing a whole route. This game has it all, and you can easily get several hours of gameplay out of it. I mean, did I mention that I willingly paid for it TWICE?

11. Dragon Age: Origins by Bioware was a gamechanger for me, literally, as it heightened my standards when it came to games in general. To this day, it remains on my top five list of greatest games of all time. You play as a character who eventually becomes a Grey Warden, whose purpose is to defeat creatures known as Darkspawn and stop a Blight that is descending upon your homeland. How you go about that fight, who you choose as allies, and your overall actions in the world are up to you. You can play out one of several backstories for your character, customize your class, and, of course, romance one of four characters. Two of the romanceable characters, Leliana and Zevran, are bisexual. In later games, you get even more romance options, but I feel that Origins is the best game overall. I could play it again and again, and have done so several times. Also, it’s on Steam, which means you can buy it and all DLCs without dealing with the annoying Origin platform.

12. Dream Daddy: A Dad Dating Simulator by Game Grumps has been talked about so much, I almost feel like I don’t need to. I will anyway. It’s a game where you play as a single dad who moves into an area that, conveniently, also has a bunch of single dads. As the title suggests, you get to date the dads you meet over the course of the game. This game is awesome because, among other aspects, it’s super inclusive. You can decide whether your dadsona is trans or not, whether your daughter is adopted, whether your previous spouse was a man or woman... The characters themselves are wonderfully-developed and three-dimensional. There are also many Dad Jokes. Also, Damian is best dad.

13. Gone Home by Fullbright is another game that is often talked about in LGBTQ circles. It’s an exploration game where you return home to an empty house and learn by going through different rooms, reading letters, and finding items, the story of your character’s family, particularly your sister. I love games that force you to explore and work for the whole storyline, because it feels so much more fulfilling when it all plays out. Gone Home does this brilliantly! I will say that it’s a short game for the price, so I’d recommend waiting for a sale.

14. Life is Strange by DONTNOD Entertainment is one of the greatest games I have ever played, period. I will never be able to say enough good things about it. You play as Max Caulfield, a photographer who has recently moved back to her hometown to attend the prestigious Blackwell Academy. There, she reunites with her estranged best friend, Chloe Price, falls into a mystery surrounding a missing student, and learns that she has the ability to rewind time. It’s a game where choices in the first episode will impact what happens in the fifth. All of the characters are memorable. You will absolutely fall in love with Arcadia Bay and get sucked into the mystery surrounding it. I played this game over the course of three days when I first bought it, because I just couldn’t stop. It remains one of the most emotional experiences I’ve ever had. As for LGBTQ aspects, both Max and Chloe are bisexual, and you can play Max as having feelings for Chloe and/or her friend Warren.

15. miraclr- Divine Dating Sim by Woodsy Studio is a fun little game about falling in love with an angel via group chat. Your character has been chosen to communicate with the seraphim (and Lucifer) concerning the implementation of the first miracle Earth has seen in ages. Most of the game involves chatting with the angels, deciding on a miracle, and entering private group chats to develop your relationship with the angels. You get to choose your pronouns, and Gabriel goes by they/them pronouns. I’ve only played one route, but it was pretty cute! The one annoying aspect is the fact that it’s modeled after a mobile game and sets chats for certain times. You can easily bypass that, however, by choosing to power through or rewind.

16. Nekojishi by Team Nekojishi is...a mixed bag, if I’m going to be honest. The likeability of the characters fluctuates a lot, and the True Ending had A LOT of issues for me. Still, I played the thing for nine whole hours! It’s a game about Liao, a college student and aspiring dancer whose third eye is suddenly opened, giving him the ability to see gods and spirits. Among these spirits are Guardian Tiger, a family guardian spirit who wants Liao to return to his family’s temple and use his abilities there, Clouded Leopard, who wants Liao to become a go-between for him and his worshipers, and Leopard Cat, who has possessed one of Liao’s classmates in order to convince him to create a temple for an earth god he’s connected to. Obviously, Liao isn’t so keen to abandon his own life in order to fulfill any of these wishes, but the spirits decide to remain by his side until he makes a choice. You can romance one or all of the characters, leading to different endings which, again, vary in quality. Still, the art and music are great, there are many tidbits on Taiwanese folklore, and it’s free! If you’re into gay beastmen and folklore, this is a good game to check out.

17. Night in the Woods by Infinite Fall is another game that played with my emotions. Like, it got so real, I needed to take frequent breaks during my first playthrough. You play as Mae Borowski, a college dropout returning to her hometown for reasons unknown to the player for most of the game. Falling into her former, aimless life, Mae reconnects with her friends while learning of the darker secrets of Possum Springs. Mae is pansexual, and two of her friends, Gregg and Angus, are in a relationship that is further explored if you choose to get closer to Gregg over the course of the game. This game delves into heavy subjects like depression, helplessness, the slow death of a town, and growing apart from the people you once knew.

18. I’m ending this list with a game everyone should know about: Stardew Valley by Concerned Ape. This is the peak of all farming simulation games! You play as a character who inherits a farm from their grandfather and moves there to escape their meaningless office job. Once there, you can develop your farm, fight monsters, explore, and befriend the townsfolk. Whether you play as a male or female, the romance options are all open. You can marry, have kids, and raise a family together. All of the characters have great events, but my favorite has to be my goth boi Sebastian.

Phew... Remind me not to let this go for nine days again. That took awhile... Anyway, I hope you find something you like. See you tomorrow!

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dkettchen · 5 years ago

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BLACK MIRROR S5E1 “STRIKING VIPERS” E X P L A I N E D

-with the help of gender and game theory-

Y’all asked for it so here we go

Some things before we start: -If you were watching the episode looking for gay/trans shit, and got disappointed, I’m sorry but I can’t help you because that’s just not what the episode was about and that is ok. It explored some aspects of queer experience, and the limbo between queer and cis-straight experience, that isn’t usually addressed in such an honest and indepth way, which I think is just as important as trans or gay rep. -I will focus my analysis on the core theme of what certain academics writing about androgyny call the “moment of transgression” so in this case the question of ‘what is Karl/Roxette’s deal & what does that mean for Danny/Lance’s feelings toward and interactions with them?’. -CW: transphobia, homophobia, toxic masculinity, (rpg) uncanny valley stuff, you get it, you know what subjects we’ll be talking about here.

Now!

I’d like to start by pointing out the title “Striking Vipers” to get the phallus talk out of the way right off the bat x’D: It’s a very blatant penis metaphor, and Vipers specifically are venomous, so represent toxic masculinity. The image of them striking signals danger. The repetition of phallic symbols represents the threat of castration (see medusa turning them bois to stone & the heroic masculinity of the mirror shielded boi who managed to defeat her), which to phallocentric masculinity is the scawiest thing there is (losing the phallus = losing manhood = death?? I guess??). Striking Vipers means that toxic masculinity, by nature, is a threat to itself. (I could talk for hours about the exact warped logic of phallocentricity but Imma spare y’all cause I don’t think it’s relevant for this, I’d even go as far as saying this episode was anti-phallic (which I use here as a more inclusive word for “feminist”, as the episode’s core is about two guys, but still focused on them experiencing and embracing feminine power and freeing themselves from phallocentricity(/patriarchy)’s grasp, just like “what men want” was preoccupied with the toxic masculinity of its female protagonist)) That sets up the kind of horror the episode will be about, the male fear of castration, of loss of identity, of having to face the fact that traditional masculinity is toxic even to the people who conform to it. 10/10 title choice.

Next up: the core question of what label to put on Karl and Danny’s VR interactions (‘Fellas, is it gay to fuck ur best friend in a lady body in VR?’). Which leads to the first question which is: what gender is Karl when he’s playing as Roxette? An essentialist might say: ‘Well he’s a man irl so he’s still a man even if he plays with a female avatar. Danny’s attraction to him is either him being trapped or just plain old gay.’ But I don’t think that’s the case. It’s not a trap scenario (have some videos on traps and how they’re not real actually: (x.), (x.)), because both people involved know the exact parameters of the situation. Danny knows this is Karl in Roxette’s body, there’s nothing hidden, no misunderstanding to be had here. I also don’t think it’s gay because if it was this would’ve happened irl or with two male avatars, but it only happened once one of them was in a female avatar, that was the change that made it happen. It’s not a fetishising phallic/trans women scenario either, because it’s the opposite, it’s a man’s mind in a woman’s body. There’s no doubt about Karl being a man irl, a queer man sure, but definetely a man. He’s just too into -womanhood while playing her for me to say he’s still male when he’s in that form, like Karl as Roxette isn’t a trans guy as a man’s mind in a female body usually would be (like f.e. Ranma 1/2), I also don’t think Karl as Roxette is an androgyne/non-binary/third term either, because again, he’s embracing her womanhood and the role that comes with it, to the extreme that is hetero PiV sex, too much. I’d argue what we see is the closest to the liberation and euphoria described by other queer men when doing drag, she’s just a more extreme version of drag, of crossplaying, making the fantasy real, wearing not only the clothes of a woman but the body too. Roxette as Karl’s avatar is an alter ego, who is female, so -on the risk of sounding like the biggest performativist since Judith Butler- Karl as Roxette presents as female, so, for all intents and purposes, is female in that moment, regardless of his irl persona maintaining his male gender outside of that.

But that wasn’t what we wanted to know, was it. Because even if, in the moment that Karl plays Roxette, we can say that person is female, that doesn’t eliminate the fact that Karl, outside of that, isn’t and that he’s still the one playing her. It’s the notion of how the player/actor/performer and avatar/character/persona aren’t the same thing and can have different relationships with someone in real life vs in the game, and how that can be confusing to think about because there is no clear line between the two, something that is called “bleed” in ludology(/game studies, from lat. ludus: game or school; referring to the gladiator schools in like the colosseum), despite their relationships being fundamentally different (in this case friendship irl vs passionate love in game). Take TAZ as an example: The McElroys are related, but in playing a trpg, the DM, usually Griffin, takes up the mantle of all NPCs in the game world, including love interests. Griffin played Julia, Kravitz, and Danny (different Danny lol), but he’s talking to his brother, except he isn’t, is he, cause it’s not Griffin talking and it’s not his brother responding, it’s two characters interacting. A similar uncanny valley can be found in actor/character bleed: Take Ludi and Pom (the actors for Lance and Roxette) in this one: like 80% of their screentime was spent making out or having fake sex. These actors aren’t dating (as far as I’m aware lol), this is their job, to fake love each other on screen, imagine having to do that with a coworker you feel nothing for. It’s the characters that feel something and you have to play that feeling (which is so meta at that point, they’re playing characters that are avatars being played by characters in the show). Also, talking of role-playing, can we appreciate the scene of Danny & Theo at the bar where they’re role-playing and she’s like that was hot and he’s like mental note bae’s into role-playing, because DAMN that foreshadowing of the erotic potential of roleplay as a concept.

But it’s not role-playing really either with Danny and Karl, is it? They’re playing in avatars other than themselves but they’re not fully a different person. They still very much feel the same just in a different form. Their emotions are real even though they might only apply to part of their experience, the in-game part. Yet they obviously take them seriously and personal and get influenced by them outside the game. Maybe the question is what is and is not role-playing? Where does the bleed start and end, and do we even need to know the answer to those questions? They answer those questions for themselves in the end by testing out their feelings irl to see if they track or not, fully ready for both possibilities (which 10/10 character development love it). They want clarity. It’s about the emotional limbo fantasy brings with it. It’s the same question “Are traps gay” is about. (Not the “Is it ok to feel attracted to androgynous ppl” one necessarily, but) “Does feeling attracted to the fantasy mean you feel attracted to the “real” thing underneath?” Are the feelings for the fantasy alone or also for the reality? Are they only applicable to the latter and does that change something about what you thought you knew about yourself? It’s a question about the fringe edges of limited/monosexuality and the very fabric of reality.

Let’s return to Karl to look at his experience as Roxette. We’ve established that she is female, but what is Karl while playing her? In the spirit of queer drag as liberating, it’s almost like he’s taking a break from being Karl when playing as her. Drag, crossplay, or this extreme version of it, functions as a break from the toxicity and limitations of traditional gender roles (so in this case traditional masculinity). It is freeing, though what does it free? Some genderless spirit inhabiting each person? But then how do you explain the firm gender identity lots of people, including for all we know Karl, experience in everyday life? As a trans person I know that there is SOMETHING to gender on some level that can create gender dysphoria (social and/or physical) for people when put in a body they don’t identify with. As a drag performer, trpg enthousiast, and notorious crossplayer, I know that taking a break from that reality and being somebody else can be relieving, a break from your own problems. So what is that part of us that translates into fantasy? I feel like this goes into transhumanist territory which I don’t know enough about to even attempt to provide an answer. I think what it comes down to in terms of gender theory is, this is a situation at the height of where performativism is true and relevant. There is a relativity to the nature of reality and gender itself. Whatever base essence there is that causes gender dysphoria at a mismatch between outside and inside, doesn’t apply here. Both notions (of essential and performative gender) are real and have an impact on people but neither is always the case and neither is never the case. They’re not mutually exclusive.

So, seeing as it seems impossible to pinpoint what gender Karl/Roxette qualifies as (other than all and/or none), let’s look at the nature of Danny/Lance and Karl/Roxette’s interactions and feelings toward those interactions and each other to try and contextualise what label(s) they might fit under. The desire on Danny’s side when faced with Roxette’s form shows itself in a way he’d never feel toward Karl. That visual change, and the social changes it brings with it (in gender role), makes it so extreme, because it pairs the parts of his friend he appreciates and enjoys (personality and whatever deeper connection a close friendship brings with it), with a form that is attractive to him. That change translates to Karl too. In playing with this new form that has a different role and a different effect on someone he’s known for so long, he flows into that, melts into this new persona and lives it up! The way they interact in game isn’t gay. It is very much reflecting how straight attraction and female sexuality works. On one hand it’s based in undeniable difference (hetero = different), and on the other hand Karl/Roxette’s enjoyment thereof is based in being desirable, in having that power of seduction just by existing, that notion of feminine power and the freedom that comes with it. It’s not autogynephilia, that would imply he gets off on the idea of himself as a woman, which is not the case, he gets off on being desired as a woman, which is what female sexuality is about (source: ContraPoints’ Autogynephilia video (which I recommend, it’s very good))

Still whenever Karl tries to get Danny to keep having VR sex with him/Roxette, he talks about her in 3rd person, like a persona. In saying “it’s just like porn” he poses something that is very much a different activity (acting out the porn by -doin’ it-) as a homosocially (social as opposed to sexual/romantic) acceptable one (watching porn together which I’ve been told is a thing). He attempts to differentiate himself from his female persona and enjoyment there-of (by objectifying her, like a porn actress to be watched rather than identified with), himself and Danny from the queerness (in enjoying femininity and in Danny being down with basically fucking a drag-queen) and to retreat back into heteronormative traditional masculinity, away from the scawy unknown of exploring your sexuality. His internalised homo- and transphobia makes him suppose that Danny, as a supposed straight guy, will only respond to the safety of assured non-queerness, which, honestly, I don’t think is the case with him. Karl supposes his cancelling on him and not wanting to do it anymore is out of the fear for his sexual identity or whatever, but from what I can tell, while Danny also seems to be rather confused about what it all means, the reasons he cancels their nightly sessions, and rejects Karl/Roxette, are always about not wanting his marriage to fall apart. He quite clearly prefers hot VR sex to hanging out with his wife, and cancels out of duty to her rather than fear. Even the first time they kiss, Karl is the one to freak out first. Danny seems much calmer about the attraction part of the situation, to the point of in the end being the one to take initiative and make them try it out irl to put an end to the confusion.

The episode hits hard because it takes the way men play video games and brings it to its logical conclusion. Video games are mens safe-space, and they do play with that playful flirty banter. The show takes that and makes it real, including taking it to its extreme conclusion that is -doin’ it-. It infiltrates the male safe space by taking normalised behaviour, and taking it so far that it puts traditional masculinity and heteronormative attraction in question, the very thing the safe space was supposed to protect them from. That’s why it’s existentially horrifying for the main characters (and viewers that identify with them) and qualifies as a black mirror episode even without having a homo-/trans-/biphobic ending (like other media that put traditional masculinity in question usually do, not to mention all the horror based in queer-coding)

Hope y’all enjoyed this journey into a bit of mind-bending game and gender theory! Pls don’t expect me to do this like ever again bc I need to go work on my actual essay rip x’D

#long post #Black Mirror #BM: Striking Vipers #games studies #gender studies

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blessedarethebinarybreakers · 5 years ago

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(Not super urgent, there’s a few weeks to go 🙂) Hi! I’m finally going to be a leader on the Christian camp I’ve been going to for 10 years. This is the first year I’ve been out as a lesbian to my family and friends at home, but only two leaders at camp know. I want to be authentic (feeling closeted makes me feel like I can’t join in worship properly because I feel like I’m withholding from God and his kingdom) but I’m scared. 1/3 camp anon

I’m scared of my presence becoming political there and being treated differently (and negatively by some, although most will be tolerant I think, and some will be wonderful), and I’m scared of being told to keep it from the kids (not like I’d talk about my love life anyway, but if they asked). I’m also scared that I’m wrong about being a lesbian and it’s just a phase. Imagine jeopardizing relationships that have been built over a decade over something impermanent!! 2/3 camp anon

The only other lesbian there is much older than me, mostly closeted, and pursues celibacy. She’s wonderful and people who know still love her, but I have no desire to be celibate. Do you have any advice? I want to be authentic with my friends and these people who I respect, but it makes me so anxious thinking about the follow-up conversations and consequences… Thank you!! 3/3 camp anon

___________

Hi there, so sorry for the long delay in replying. This is a tough predicament you’re in, and I’m not sure my thoughts on what I would do in such a situation will be the best advice for you – so much depends on context, after all. So I’ll also open this up to anyone else who might have advice for you!

First off, I would put aside the worry that you’re wrong about being a lesbian and that it’s just a phase. Chances are that you’re not wrong (or perhaps you’ll shift the language you identify with over time, but I’d bet on you being LGBT in some way) – most people go about their lives never questioning their sexuality because they’re straight and society teaches us all to assume that we’re straight. If a person has reason to question that compulsory heterosexuality for themselves, chances are they’re right, and they’re not straight.

And heck, even if it does turn out one day that you are straight after all, that being a lesbian was just a phase or you were mistaken about it – that would be okay! I just answered another ask where someone was also worried their being gay was just a phase; I told them that all of life comes in phases and cycles, and how permanent or impermanent a phase is doesn’t make it more or less legitimate. Regardless of the future, if Lesbian is the identity that feels most accurate and makes most sense to you right now, then that’s what you are – and you deserve respect and welcome just as you are, without having to hide that aspect of your identity.

_____

On to your desire to be authentic – I really feel that. I also feel disconnected from the community I’m trying to worship God with when I’m forced to do so while closeted. It would not be right for anyone to expect you to do that; you deserve worship that nourishes your spirit! However, it’s up to you as an individual to decide what being out versus being closeted means to you personally. For some, being out means being vocal about their gender and/or sexuality, bringing it up frequently. For others, being out means just not lying if someone asks about their gender and/or sexuality outright.

If the latter suits you, there hopefully won’t be too many instances where you have to talk about your sexuality. Even those couple of leaders who do know might not say anything. But it’s so contextual – unfortunately, there is always the possibility that someone will confront you and try to force you to have a conversation about it. If that happens, it is perfectly appropriate to say that yes, you are a lesbian, but you do not want to discuss the issue of sexuality with them. You have no obligation to have a conversation about it if you don’t want to.

As to being asked to hide it from the kids, that would be rough, and unfair. If it comes to that, hopefully telling the leaders that you don’t plan to say anything unless a kid asks will be enough. I will say that if there are any kids who are LGBT themselves, knowing that a Christian camp leader is like them might mean the world to them. You have no obligation to be that person for anyone else, and your safety and comfort are priorities, but if it does come to that, knowing that you’ve helped an LGBT child might help ease some of the fear or pain.

I wish I had more advice, anon. What I can do is pray for you – I pray that God’s Spirit rains courage and wisdom down on you in abundance, preparing you for any situation that comes up at the camp. No matter what, you are good, and you are loved, and God is with you, holding you up every step of the way.

Does anyone else have more advice or encouragement for anon?

#Anonymous #camp anon

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stars--n--stripes-blog · 5 years ago

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Like any religion, wokeness understands the need to convert children. The old Jesuit motto (sometimes attributed to Voltaire) was, after all, “Give me the child for the first seven years and I will give you the man.” And so I was moved but not particularly surprised by George Packer’s tale of a progressive school banishing separate restrooms for boys and girls because this reinforces the gender binary. The school did not inform parents of this, of course:

Parents only heard about it when children started arriving home desperate to get to the bathroom after holding it in all day. Girls told their parents mortifying stories of having a boy kick open their stall door. Boys described being afraid to use the urinals. Our son reported that his classmates, without any collective decision, had simply gone back to the old system, regardless of the new signage: Boys were using the former boys’ rooms, girls the former girls’ rooms. This return to the familiar was what politicians call a “commonsense solution.” It was also kind of heartbreaking.

As an analogy for the price of progressivism, it’s close to perfect. Authorities impose an ideology onto reality; reality slowly fights back. The question is simply how much damage is done by this kind of utopianism before it crumbles under its own weight. Simple solutions — like a separate, individual gender-neutral bathroom for the tiny minority with gender dysphoria or anyone else — are out of bounds. They are, after all, reinforcing the idea that girls and boys are different. And we cannot allow biology, evolution, reproductive strategy, hormones, chromosomes, and the customs of every single human culture since the beginning of time to interfere with “social justice.”

It’s also vital to expose children to the fact of their race as the core constituent of their identity. Here is an essay written by a woke teacher about the difficulty of teaching “White boys”:

I spend a lot of my days worried about White boys. I worry about White boys who barely try and expect to be rewarded, who barely care and can’t stand being called on it, who imagine they can go through school without learning much without it impacting in any way the capacity for their future success, just because it never has before.

This sounds to me as if he is describing, well, boys of any race. And when boys are labeled as “White” (note the capital “W”) and this requires specific rules not applied to nonwhite boys, they often — surprise! — don’t like it:

This week, a student spoke up in class to say that every time a particular writer talked about White people and their role in racism, he would start to feel really guilty, and it made him not want to listen … I try to keep an arm around the boys who most need it, but it’s hard, because I’m also not willing to give an inch on making my room safe for my students of color. It’s not their job to keep hurting while White boys figure it out.

Children, in other words, are being taught to think constantly about race, and to feel guilty if they are the wrong one. And, of course, if they resist, that merely proves the point. A boy who doesn’t think he is personally responsible for racism is merely reflecting “white fragility” which is a function of “white supremacy.” QED. No one seems to have thought through the implications of telling white boys that their core identity is their “whiteness,” or worried that indoctrinating kids into white identity might lead quite a few to, yes, become “white identitarians” of the far right.

One of the key aspects about social-justice theory is that it’s completely unfalsifiable (as well as unreadable); it’s a closed circle that refers only to itself and its own categories. (For a searing take down of this huge academic con, check out Douglas Murray’s superb new book, The Madness of Crowds.) The forces involved — “white supremacy,” “patriarchy,” “heterosexism” — are all invisible to the naked eye, like the Holy Spirit. Their philosophical origins — an attempt by structuralist French philosophers to rescue what was left of Marxism in the 1960s and 1970s — are generally obscured in any practical context. Like religion, you cannot prove any of its doctrines empirically, but children are being forced into believing them anyway. This is hard, of course, as this teacher explains: “I’m trying. I am. But you know how the saying goes: You can lead a White male to anti-racism, but you can’t make him think.”

The racism, sexism, and condescension in those sentences! (The teacher, by the way, is not some outlier. In 2014, he was named Minnesota’s Teacher of the Year!) Having taken one form of religion out of the public schools, the social-justice left is now replacing it with the doctrines of intersectionality.

Last week, I defended drag queens reading stories to kids in libraries. I don’t take back my words. Getting children interested in reading with costumed clowns strikes me as harmless. But when I was directed to the website of Drag Queen Story Hours, I found the following:

[DQSH] captures the imagination and play of the gender fluidity of childhood and gives kids glamorous, positive, and unabashedly queer role models. In spaces like this, kids are able to see people who defy rigid gender restrictions and imagine a world where people can present as they wish, where dress up is real.

However well-meant, this is indoctrination into an ideology, not campy encouragement for reading and fun.

And then there is the disturbing “social justice” response to gender-nonconforming boys and girls. Increasingly, girly boys and tomboys are being told that gender trumps sex, and if a boy is effeminate or bookish or freaked out by team sports, he may actually be a girl, and if a girl is rough and tumble, sporty, and plays with boys, she may actually be a boy.

In the last few years in Western societies, as these notions have spread, the number of children identifying as trans has skyrocketed. In Sweden, the number of kids diagnosed with gender dysphoria, a phenomenon stable and rare for decades, has, from 2013 to 2016, increased almost tenfold. In New Zealand, the rate of girls identifying as boys has quadrupled in the same period of time; in Britain, where one NHS clinic is dedicated to trans kids, there were around a hundred girls being treated in 2011; by 2017, there were 1,400.

Possibly this sudden surge is a sign of pent-up demand, as trans kids emerge from the shadows, which, of course, is a great and overdue thing. The suffering of trans kids can be intense and has been ignored for far too long. But maybe it’s also some gender non-conforming kids falling prey to adult suggestions, or caused by social contagion. Almost certainly it’s both. But one reason to worry about the new explosion in gender dysphoria is that it seems recently to be driven by girls identifying as boys rather than the other way round. Female sexuality is more fluid and complex than male sexuality, so perhaps girls are more susceptible to ideological suggestion, especially when they are also taught that being a woman means being oppressed.

In the case of merely confused or less informed kids, the consequences of treatment can be permanent. Many of these prepubescent trans-identifying children are put on puberty blockers, drugs that suppress a child’s normal hormonal development, and were originally designed for prostate cancer and premature puberty. The use of these drugs for gender dysphoria is off-label, unapproved by the FDA; there have been no long-term trials to gauge the safety or effectiveness of them for gender dysphoria, and the evidence we have of the side effects of these drugs in FDA-approved treatment is horrifying. Among adults, the FDA has received 24,000 reports of adverse reactions, over half of which it deemed serious. Parents are pressured into giving these drugs to their kids on the grounds that the alternative could be their child’s suicide. Imagine the toll of making a decision about your child like that?

Eighty-five percent of gender-dysphoric children grow out of the condition — and most turn out to be gay. Yes, some are genuinely trans and can and should benefit from treatment. And social transition is fine. But children cannot know for certain who they are sexually or emotionally until they have matured past puberty. Fixing their “gender identity” when they’re 7 or 8, or even earlier, administering puberty blockers to kids as young as 12, is a huge leap in the dark in a short period of time. It cannot be transphobic to believe that no child’s body should be irreparably altered until they are of an age and a certainty to make that decision themselves.

I don’t have children, but I sure worry about gay kids in this context. I remember being taunted by some other kids when I was young — they suggested that because I was mildly gender-nonconforming, I must be a girl. If my teachers and parents and doctors had adopted this new ideology, I might never have found the happiness of being gay and comfort in being male. How many gay kids, I wonder, are now being led into permanent physical damage or surgery that may be life-saving for many, but catastrophic for others, who come to realize they made a mistake. And what are gay adults doing to protect them? Nothing. Only a few ornery feminists, God bless them, are querying this.

In some ways, the extremism of the new transgender ideology also risks becoming homophobic. Instead of seeing effeminate men as one kind of masculinity, as legitimate as any other, transgenderism insists that girliness requires being a biological girl. Similarly, a tomboy is not allowed to expand the bandwidth of what being female can mean, but must be put into the category of male. In my view, this is not progressive; it’s deeply regressive. There’s a reason why Iran is a world leader in sex-reassignment surgery, and why the mullahs pay for it. Homosexuality in Iran is so anathema that gay boys must be turned into girls, and lesbian girls into boys, to conform to heterosexual norms. Sound a little too familiar?

Adults are increasingly forced to obey the new norms of “social justice” or be fired, demoted, ostracized, or canceled. Many resist; many stay quiet; a few succumb and convert. Children have no such options.

Indoctrinate yourselves as much as you want to, guys. It’s a free country. But hey, teacher — leave those kids alone.

By Andrew Sullivan

#transgender ideology #transgender children #transwomen #transmen #indoctrination #mental health #*

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goodjoboo · 3 years ago

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The thumb ring can have a special meaning for the person who wears it. A special design can mean something to you, but it is important to know that you're not the only one who wears a thumb ring. You might even have more than one if you're interested in several of them. Some people are even afraid to wear them out of fear that they'll look bad. So what's the best option?

Thumb rings have meanings. Depending on the placement of the ring, they can denote different gender roles. In the case of women, a thumb ring on the right hand indicates bisexuality while one on the left hand indicates lesbianism. However, there are no specific gender-specific meanings of thumb rings. Some cultures simply wear them to signify their sexuality. You should consider your style and the type of ring you wear to make sure you'll look good.

Thumb rings are worn by women for many reasons. They are a beautiful way to express yourself and are often a symbol of a woman's independence. They can signify her status as single or a gay man. It also signifies her sexual orientation. A woman who wears a thumb rings can also be seen as a strong, independent person. They can be very decorative. There are a variety of colors and styles to choose from.

Thumb rings are a popular fashion accessory and have different meanings depending on the culture of the person wearing them. In ancient Egypt, they were considered a protective amulet against evil spirits and could protect a person from illnesses. In the Renaissance, they were seen as a symbol of love and loyalty, which may make them especially attractive for women. The symbolism behind them is a unique aspect of the jewelry. There are a variety of reasons why a woman might want to wear a thumb ring.

A thumb ring can be made from different types of materials, depending on the type of stone used. For instance, a ring made from gold or silver is a popular choice for many women. Aside from being a fashion statement, it also can be a sign of true love. The Celtic knot represents eternal love and a family's bond. These symbols can be romantic or familial. These rings are also a great way to express a person's personality.

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#goodjoboo #Thumb Rings #Thumb Rings For Women #Thumb Rings For Men #Gold Thumb Rings #Silver Thumb Rings #Open Thumb Rings #Minimalist Thumb Rings #Statement Thumb Rings

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foxtailapp · 3 years ago

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The Best Tantra Books: Top 10 Recommendations for 2021

This post is originally from Pleasure Uncensored by Foxtail. It can be found here.

Believe it or not, there are some people out there who love to read books. There are also people who like to enrich their love and sex life. Do you belong to this group? Truth is, regardless of your preference for a hard copy or an e-book, books can alter your life. Reading books can expand our horizons and open new views of the world. In our post, we made an excellent selection of the best tantra books for 2021. But first, let’s find out why you need a Tantra book.

Why Choose Tantra Books?

We believe tantra books will help you increase your knowledge of conscious sexuality. If you want to know more about tantra, tantric sex, or tantric massage, you can read our in-depth articles on our page.

While learning is expensive, reading is a good alternative for personal development. A thoughtful way to save money is to take advantage of reading a book. Some people go on coaching seminars, workshops, etc. but that can be expensive. Since you can learn everything by yourself step-by-step at home, you don’t need a teacher.

The book can be your teacher. Indeed, you need to have focus and discipline if you want to learn on your own. Even though workshops and coaches have their purpose, they’re just one piece of the puzzle.

This updated top 10 worldwide book list on Tantra in 2021, no doubt, will help you out in one way or another. You might like to add one tantra book to your wish list. Here’s our booklist of recommendations.

Top 10 Tantra Books Recommendations in 2021

1. All books by David Deida

Have you ever had that feeling that your sex life or relationship is not good enough? Have you ever wondered why you frequently end up with people that are not good for you? For example, some people are even worried that they will never find someone else sexually attractive. That is a dark thought indeed.

David Deida is a heavyweight tantra author. He is known for his incredible tantra books that explore the nature of relationships. In these books, the author describes ways on how to expand relationships and build trust. In other words, all of his tantra books are a great read and are genuinely committed to love. Here is one of our suggestions.

2. Urban Tantra – Barbara Carrellas

You haven’t experienced “Urban Tantra” if you believe sexual and spiritual bliss cannot be found in the hectic pace of today’s world. In fact, some people refer to it as the “sex book for the new millennium”. The famed sex educator Barbara Carrellas examines the centuries-old Tantric practice and lays it in a practical way for modern sexual explorers. In other words, after reading this book you will want to exceed your limitations and achieve universal orgasm. Neat right!

The book “Urban Tantra” is about consciousness and includes instructions on having fun and having sex. Therefore, this tantra book is for everyone who wants to expand sexual and spiritual ecstasy in life. In this book, you will learn the practice of sacred sex anywhere and anytime. When we say always, we mean the available time you have in your busy schedule.

“Urban Tantra” brings together contemporary sex and acceptance. In addition, this is one of the few books about gay and BDSM, which is transgender-friendly and features BDSM scenes.

It doesn’t matter if you’re single if you’re gay, and even if you’re old. With more than 100 exercises that can help you explore and enjoy sex whether you’re partnered or not, regardless of your age, sexual preference, or gender.

3. Orgasm Unleashed – Eyal Matsliah

“Orgasm Unleashed” teaches you to expand and deepen your orgasm in the comfort of your own home before going to see your lover. The book’s topic is female orgasm, which is fantastic. In conclusion, “Orgasm Unleashed” is simple to follow, and it offers numerous activities to help you get to grips with it.

4. Tantra Illuminated. The Philosophy, History, and Practice of a Timeless Tradition

This tantra book uniquely deals with tantric history, delving into the fascinating and complex aspects of the practice. In addition, it explains the Tantric philosophy and the misunderstandings of Western societies. Above all, this book has comprehensively presented the discovery and eroticization of Tantra.

Its goal is to give additional attention to the tradition’s sacred teachings, and most of the information in the tradition is drawn from the original Sanskrit sources. By participating in these activities, you’ll learn more about Tantra, and you’ll have a desire to participate in a tantra retreat so you can experience the power for yourself.

5. Introduction to Tantra. The Transformation of Desire

This discussion looks at the practices and philosophies of Tibetan Buddhism from the viewpoint of tantra. This book addresses these questions about tantra by a Tibetan lama. For example, it explains what Tantra is, who it is for, and how it is practiced.

6. Kundalini Tantra

Those who want to learn more about Tantra will find this book helpful. It is a manual written by an Indian Swami (master) and Tantra Guru. It focuses on the history and cultural significance of Tantra while using a traditional approach.

The “Kundalini Tantra” is not only a creative and scholarly guide but a practical handbook. In this handbook, you can find details about how Tantra activates the chakras and the Kundalini energy. It also provides instruction on how to begin your practice.

7. 28 Days To Ecstasy For Couples — A Basic Primer

If you are new to the spiritual path or you’re curious about new things in the bedroom, this book is for you. The “28 Days To Ecstasy For Couples” is a beginner’s coursebook. So in other words, this book is a step-by-step guide. It is perfect for beginners who want to try and master tantric techniques.

The authors bring the time-consuming aspects of everyday life together into four weeks of 20-minute sessions. In conclusion, the exercise helps to preserve the essence of tantric practice while fostering intimacy and awareness in the bedroom.

8. The Way of the Superior Man: A Spiritual Guide to Mastering the Challenges of Women, Work an Sexual Desire

We recommend David Deida’s “The Way of the Superior Man” to both genders, male and female. For men, it is a classic. For women, it is priceless. Once you’re ready to get into the spirit of loving, this tantra book is an excellent place to begin. David Deida is someone who you want to study thoroughly when you are into conscious sexuality and relationship path.

9. The Books of Osho

One excellent example is the book “Tantra: The Supreme Insight”. Osho is a top-rated but controversial spiritual teacher. He is the author of many books on meditation and spiritual practice. We strongly recommend him if you want to expand your mind.

Like other authors, he takes a holistic approach. In this book, he encourages us to consider the fullness of tantra rather than just consider it solely as a sexual practice. Therefore, this is a life-changing tantra book you must read.

10. Tantric Orgasm for Women

“Tantric Orgasm for Women” contains more information than you think to have in a book. It’s an approachable tantra book that can be understood. In addition, many women have improved their sex lives because of it. Thanks to this book!

If you find this post helpful then check out our other articles on our blog page.

You can also sign up on our app and meet other like-minded people. Cheers!

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eri-blogs-life · 4 years ago

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Eri’s Itchio Adventure, Week 12

Have you ever wondered what it’d be like to be horribly depressed in an alternate reality where that horrible ET game never got made?

No judgement. In fact, have I got the game for you

In my continuing quest to play through everything from that huge BLM bundle that Itchio offered up months ago, this week I played the game Arcade Spirits!

Arcade Spirits is a visual novel with some optional dating sim aspects, about working at an arcade in an alternate universe where the arcade scene is still booming and gamers go out to play in person all the time. It’s got it all, it’s got action, romance, comedy, queer content, and video games! What more could you want?

I guess let’s start with...

A big aspect of Arcade Spirits is about the characters (as a lot of stories are, surely). The characters of Arcade Spirits all have a lot of charm to them, and as you spend time around these folks you definitely feel like you get to know them better and learn about stuff that’s not apparent at a glance. Each of them has their own big personal situation they’ve got going on, surely, but they do feel fleshed out enough with a lot of fun and weird character traits.

And speaking of characters, during my playthrough I ended up dating Ashley, and...

The colors of her swimsuit in the Beach Episode are definitely not coincidence. After all, her whole personal struggle that hanging out with her really focuses on is that she’s unsure of her identity. And it’s made pretty explicit that gender is a big aspect of that, with her saying that she’s “not sure if she’s 100% woman... or 100% man, but she does know that she’s Ashley Wolf, and for now that’s good enough for her” (paraphrased, for sure, but mostly accurate).

In fact, this game has a ton of queer representation, and naturally as one of the transes and the bis I gotta say I always appreciate some good queer rep. You’ve got:

- During character creation, you don’t choose a gender, you just choose a presentation and pronouns (he/she/they all being options)

- Ashley, who struggles with her identity and eventually accepts herself as just kinda being herself

- A gay couple who run a wholesome cafe nearby your arcade who can become pretty big parts of the endgame depending on how you make some choices in the endgame

- A character who uses they/them pronouns and everyone just kinda knows that’s the case and uses they/them for them from the time they show up to the end of the game. At first I wasn’t sure if this was just like a “oh this side character is just some kid and we’re gonna keep it generic because why not” but they keep showing up and it becomes clear they are enby

- An option at the beginning of the game where your cute game-guide companion offers you the option of playing with romance, focusing on the friendships but with romance as an option possibility, or playing without caring about romance at all. I opted for the middle bit and ended up dating, so I can’t say if the non-romantic option holds up throughout, but honestly most of the game is focused on the friends you make along the way anyway, so the romance feels more often like an addon than a necessary part of the experience.

And of course, all six of the main date-able options all will gladly flirt with you no matter your own gender (though, player-sexual is not on its own great representation or anything, like that’s a whole other discussion for another time but regardless it’s of course appreciated still). And I bet there are more but I’m probably blanking on some of them.

Definitely something that’s big within this game is this point above. No matter what you choose, no matter who you choose to be or who you choose to spend your time with, the story keeps moving on. (Obviously, it’s a visual novel and you can do stuff like save and go back to before your decisions and stuff but with how the game is framed it just felt right to just let every decision sit, you know?) You can’t really make wrong choices in life, and every choice will likely involve some tradeoff in one way or another, but your life is yours and you gotta just keep moving forward, even if things seem to keep you down.

The game’s protagonist/player character expresses a strong history of depression and anxiety, and that crops up throughout the game, but just gotta keep making the choice to get up and keep moving, no matter how hard it is and how shit pulls you down. And sometimes you need help to be able to make the choice to stand, and the friendships you foster while you’re doing better can help you get back up on your feel when you’re doing worse. Life’s rough, depression is rough, I for sure know that. But... But it’s got its ups and downs and I feel like Arcade Spirits does a really good job with pulling that all together.

So anyway, all in all I’d say I really, REALLY enjoyed my time with Arcade Spirits. It’s pretty hefty, with 8 “levels” (chapters?) taking around 45-60 minutes to play through apiece (which is pretty hefty relative to how much time I spent with other games in this itchio series I’m working through), with so much charm throughout the whole experience. If you’re into video games, if you’re into queer content, if you’re into visual novels, if you’re into giant pink flamingos, I’d say this is definitely a great one to check out.

...

PS This shows up at one point in the game (at least with the playthrough I had, I know there are some different choices you can make in the endgame that change around some stuff)

And ALL I could think about was

youtube

#eri blogs games #arcade spirits #this was technically on my radar for a long time as something i wanted to check out cause i watched a lets play that got like halfway....#.... through the game like a year and a half ago or something and i really really enjoyed its style at the time #so i'm really glad to finally get around to playing it myself #it was really good and i liked it a lot!!

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prideguynews · 6 years ago

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UK’s initial truth relationship clearly show for bisexuals+ (bi, pansexual, fluid, and so forth.)has been disclosed has just disclosed its forged.

The Bi Lifetime is set in Barcelona and hosted by Shane Jenek (also identified as Courtney Act), it will premiere on Oct 25th at 9pm on E! Uk & Ireland.

It follows a group of bisexual+ or questioning British singletons on an adventure to find enjoy abroad. The forged are living jointly, occasion jointly and aid every other navigate the rocky highway of bisexual+ relationship. All over the practical experience, the forged guidance and really encourage every other as they date and meet new people today in sunny Spain. For some, this will suggest discovering who they are for the very initial time.

The opponents are a varied bunch who are on the lookout for enjoy to settle down or just another person to strike the occasion circuit with.

RuPaul’s Drag Race season 6 alum and Celebrity Big Brother Uk winner, Courtney Act will host The Bi Lifetime.

Act plays both of those the function of devil’s advocate and guidance for the forged.

‘On the initial working day we experienced a big lunch and it all created perception in my head simply because there’s no political activists conversing about critical details, it is a group of true people today getting true lifestyle experiences,’ Act sayd.

‘We had been just conversing about our attractions to distinct genders and I really do not consider any of us experienced essentially sat in a group of like-minded people today devoid of getting to reveal one thing or make excuses.’

Satisfy the forged of the initial ever The Bi Lifetime:

CARMEN CLARKE

Carmen Clarke | Photo: Supplied/NBC Common

Based in Manchester, the 21-calendar year-old product is becoming a member of The Bi Lifetime simply because she wants to study a lot more about herself.

‘I’m on a private journey of discovery, but if I drop for another person far too then I’m wholly open up to that.’ she said.

Carmen retains receiving instructed she ‘looks straight’ and that she is ‘too quite to be a bisexual.’

The product can get on with any person and wishes to find a companion who will aid her see the earth in a much better light-weight.

MATT BRINDLEY

Matt Brindley | Photo: Supplied/NBC Common

Matt, 27, is an ‘influencer agent’ frome Chester. The overall body self-assured Matt is on the lookout for the exact same from his potential companion.

He hasn’t dated a girl since his extended-time period with marriage with his girlfriend ended. At the instant he’s predominantly relationship guys but claims he is ‘up for it’.

Matt wishes a ‘a ten out of 10′ companion, so another person who appears after their overall body and visual appearance.

‘My suggestions to any individual striving to figure out their sexuality is to not pay attention or be swayed by what any individual else is telling them and to just look into themselves for that reply. Do not make hasty selections,’ Matt claims.

MARIELLA AMODEO

Mariella Amodeo | Photo: Supplied/NBC Common

Make-up artist, Mariella, lived in Italy until eventually she was fourteen before transferring to London.

She’s been unfortunate in enjoy but Mariella is still committed to discovering her fairytale ending. Mariella is also emotion the pressure to settle down from herown loved ones.

Describing herself as passionate, fun and caring, Mariella is on the lookout for another person amusing, eye-catching but who is also respectful.

On offering suggestions to any individual thinking of coming out, Mariella claims to ‘just be honest. Communicate to your loved types, I’m guaranteed they would fully grasp and enjoy you regardless’.

IRENE ELLIS

Irene Ellis | Photo: Supplied/NBC Common

London’s Irene, is a self-confessed nerd who finds the relationship earth a ‘scary place’.

The 23-calendar year-old photographer wishes to make her confidence when it will come to associations and her bisexuality.

‘I want to essentially truly feel like a bisexual. I have acted very straight for a although, so to be at ease in it would be great,’ she claims.

In a prior marriage, she instructed her then boyfriend about her sexuality and questioned: ‘so you want a threesome?’. For Irene that is the most annoying issue you can inquire a bisexual.

RYAN CLEARY

Ryan Cleary | Photo: Supplied/NBC Common

Ryan, 27, from London has experienced associations with both of those guys and girls his last marriage getting a calendar year back with a male.

The exercise influencer is getting aspect in The Bi Lifetime simply because bisexuality is underrepresented on television and in true lifestyle.

‘I consider it is great to be capable to be yourself and clearly show who you are and not be concerned to do that,’ he claims.

Ryan thinks that people today perceive bisexuals to be greedy, indecisive, not know what they want or that they like a person sex a lot more than another.

DAISIE THILWIND

Daisie Thilwind | Photo: Supplied/NBC Common

Daisie claims she is a hopeless intimate who is ‘unlucky in love’ and hasn’t been in a marriage for five yrs.

The 27-calendar year-old fraud avoidance officer is ‘proud to be bisexual’ and has no dilemma telling people today about her sexuality.

The Mancurian wishes her companion to have great teeth and a great perception of humour.

In her practical experience, Daisie that fellas are just after a ‘smash and dash’ and when they find out she’s bisexual, all they want to know is about her sex lifestyle.

MICHAEL GUNNING

Michael Gunning | Photo: Supplied/NBC Common

The 24-calendar year-old from Manchester is a aggressive swimmer who has represented Wonderful Britain and is now aspect of the Jamaican staff. He wishes to swim for Jamaica at the 2020 Olympics.

But Michael’s sporting profession has pressured him to place a hold on his enjoy lifestyle. Ahead of The Bi Lifetime experienced in no way even been on a date, let by yourself have a marriage.

Michael is ‘bubbly, content and joyful’ but is afraid of receiving his heart damaged. He wishes to explore his sexuality and study a lot more about himself.

‘(The Bi Lifetime) is one thing I would in no way have dreamed I would ever have accepted in my life span, so it is a threat, and it is one thing remarkable I believed I could do,’ he claims.

‘I’m a swimmer and the only time a swimmer will get off is summertime so I believed, why not go on a clearly show like this and are living a little, and have fun this summer time!’

LEONNIE CAVILL

Leonnie Cavill | Photo: Supplied/NBC Common

Leonie is a 27-calendar year-old free spirit who is effective as a club promoter and has not long ago returned from a season in Ibiza.

She doesn’t want to hurry discovering any individual, and enjoys the partying. Leonie is very picky and will get bored actually easily and so hasn’t experienced a appropriate marriage for 7 yrs.

Leonie is on the lookout for a companion not to settle down but to share her wild periods with her.

‘I consider that the concept that The Bi Lifetime offers out is a person that I actually stand driving,’ she claims.

‘(Becoming bisexual) is the ideal point in the earth – I am no more time just stuck in a closet and neither do I truly feel humiliated.’

KYLE MCGOVERN

Kyle McGovern | Photo: Supplied/NBC Common

Hailing from South Wales, Kyle is a 23-calendar year-old guidance trainer, delivering a person on a person interest for a youngster with learning difficulties. He is also learning Cognitive Neuroscience at college.

Soon after getting out as bisexual for a calendar year now, Kyle is hoping his summer time in the villa will be ample to make him realise there is lifestyle outside of the Valleys and he intends to explore it.

Kyle describes his enjoy lifestyle as uneventful, tragic but optimistic. The clearly show is the fantastic opportunity to see what’s out there other than the people today in his hometown in Wales. He wishes to explore who he is with like- minded people today who are heading by way of the exact same journey as himself.

Got a news idea? Want to share your story? E mail us .

The post The cast of Courtney Act’s The Bi Life has been revealed appeared first on PrideGuy - Gay News, LGBT News, Politics & Entertainment.

#gay #gay news #lgbt

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