#(something something the symbolism of almost losing ellie so soon after hers)

[weirdbabs]

also since i saw some ppl posting their opinions on this i thought id share mine that ive had since 2014/posted on here in 2018

[mysterytickingegos]

At Least We Have Us

Pairing(s): Darkiplier x Platonic!reader

Genre: Angsty with a fluffy end.

Word Count: 1,771

Summary: Strange things happened to those who didn’t leave that dreadful manor in time, and you were one of those people. Becoming something not quite human took some time to get used to, but at least you weren’t alone.

Anonymous Request: Platonic Dark with a soft Y/N that's basically very motherly of him despite being much younger? She cares a lot about him and looks up to him. Maybe she's his assistant and also experienced the events of WKM and Dark basically adopted her after that? Post-WKM please! I need Dark being a wise and over protective big brother rn Thank youuuu

Authors Note: I loved working on this one! It was a fun concept, thank you so much for the request!

Want to read more?

[Image Description: A gif of Mark from a vlog video giving a thumbs up to the camera, it has been edited to be gray with Darkipliers afterimages and colors, red and blue.]

Dark...That was such a strange name to call him, at first.

Damien had been a family friend. He was your neighbor, and your best friend’s uncle. When you were a teenager he was a respected member of the local government, a man who hid away in a study and worked far too hard. Eventually with enough pushing from Ophelia, he was your boss, having given you an internship in city hall that Elli really didn’t want. You considered him a friend. Maybe not a close friend, but he was someone you trusted and respected and he would say the same about you.

You jogged up the stairs to the office, dodging past people while muttering quick apologies to anyone who had something to say about it. When you got there, you heard the laughter of your friend through the door and cracked it open. Ophelia was desperately trying to catch her breath between giggles, of course because Damien was telling another story about your completely sophisticated soon-to-be DA. He was surprisingly relaxed, leaning back on his desk and talking with his hands quite a bit.

“But of course, that doesn’t stop them, they run down the street- Oh, Y/n please come in. You’ll want to hear this.” He gestured to the empty chair beside Elli, but when you didn’t move from the doorway, both their faces fell. “What’s wrong?”

“Nothing’s wrong,” You tilted your head at them, not realizing how you looked, pale and out of breath. “Damien, they’re done counting. You won.”

He was in shock for a few moments, only standing up a bit straighter as he processed your words. “I won? I’m...?”

“You’re going to be the Mayor.” Ophelia finished for him, just before all three of you started laughing and cheering and jumping around.

In many conversations there were moments where you would catch a glimpse of the person you used to know, and in the beginning you would get a heavy heart. You weren’t ready to let him go, to accept that he was somebody else now. Perhaps that’s because it would mean accepting you were somebody else, too.

None of the guests from that damned party left the manor the same.

You heard it so clearly, a stranger’s voice coaxing you up the stairs, quietly whispering your name over and over as you slipped away from the rowdy party. You were practically hypnotized, not thinking about who it could possibly be or their intentions as they lead you to a room that sent chills down your spine the moment you opened the door. It was a room filled with trinkets of the occult, books with terrifying symbols, and scribbles of a mad man on papers scattered all over.

“You’re not supposed to be in here.” You heard a growl from a new voice, just behind you. The person shoved you inside the room and slammed the door as you hit the ground. “In fact, I could’ve sworn this was going to be hidden from all of you.”

You stood up as quickly as you could, turning to see the host of the party scowling at you. “I wasn’t...I was just looking for Elli.” You said quickly, brushing off your clothes.

“The same Elli that told you she was going to lay down for the night a couple of hours ago?” He stepped closer, slowly, ominously.

You thought back to that conversation, spoken quietly, just the two of you on the staircase while everyone else was still playing poker. “How could you even know about that?”

Mark grinned at you, sinister and cold. He gestured around the room, to the books and trinkets. “Things aren’t as they seem here, Y/n. Ever since Celine...left me here, the things in this house had opened my mind to things I never could’ve imagined.” A short laugh bubbled out of him. “I can do anything.”

“You’ve gone mad.” You whispered, backing away. You’d heard bits and pieces of the Iplier drama from Damien, having vented his concerns to you over cups of coffee during work since the day you got your invitations. But you knew now that he had no idea.

“Perhaps they were trying to do the same for you, but I’ve come too far for some kid to screw it all up now.” He turned on his feet and left the room, shutting the door behind him. You rushed over to it, trying to twist the knob before he got a chance to lock it. But it was far too late. You banged on the door and screamed for help until your voice went hoarse, but the room had in fact been hidden away. You were surrounded by taunting spirits in a room that nobody existed, for what felt like weeks. You could feel them gnawing away at bits and pieces of you after that, an itchy feeling under your heart, changing you. Truly, time had been warped, and only one day had passed before you were found by someone who was now immune to the houses secrets and cloaks. And he didn’t say anything, but clearly something had happened to you too.

Funny thing about living forever? (Or at least as long as you have,) It’s not that great, in fact it’s actually very lonely. The world changes around you, and you don’t change that much at all. You often have to leave, not wanting the attention of being the same age after living or working somewhere for 20 or 30 years. Or you get too attached to somebody and you know you will lose them, now or later.

But you weren’t alone. Despite his anger towards Mark, how badly he wanted revenge, Dark kept very close to you. Especially after he learned what happened to his niece, he was going to keep you safe above all else. Mark learned that the hard way when he tried to silence you too, only to find an empty house and a rather cheeky note.

“Catch me if you can.”

Another funny thing, you didn’t even know the power that you had when you first wrote that. As far as you knew you were a normal girl waiting out the storm. But eventually waiting got pretty tiresome.

“How could you be so foolish?” Dark called after you as you both stormed back into the house.

“Oh come on, it wasn’t that big a deal.” You huffed, tossing your jacket away.

His image faltered and glitched at what you said. “Not a big deal? You have the gift of longevity, you are NOT impervious to bullets!”

You flopped down into the armchair, crossing your arms. “We don’t know that yet.”

“You sprained your ankle tripping on air last month, I think it’s safe to say.” For a moment you could’ve sworn he smiled. If it wasn’t at your expense, you might’ve been happy. “You wonder why I hover,”

“Someone had to step in and do something.”

“Why did it have to be you?!”

“Because!” You twisted around in the chair to face him, fighting back tears. “I’m bored! I’m sick of living like a hermit! I’m tired of these stupid towns in the middle of nowhere and never having any friends...it’s been almost a century Dark, I don’t know how much longer I can do this.”

He pierced his lips, having to look away from you before he got emotional himself. “So this is your plan? Play hero until you run out of luck?”

“Or we can stop hiding. We can try and live our lives, instead of just surviving. I mean, what's the point if we’re completely miserable?”

“And what about him?”

“To hell with Mark, what about you?” Your voice was softer now. “I can work, and shop and be neighborly. But you...you’ve been stuck in the shadows, holding onto your hate all this time. Maybe you don’t believe it after everything that’s happened, but you deserve better.”

He sighed, running a hand through his hair. “What then? Where do you want to go?”

“How about we go home?”

‘Home’ was California, LA specifically. Sure, you could’ve gone back to your hometown but you were both part of a rather famous local mystery and you agreed it was for the best to stay away.

The sun had set a little bit ago and the streets were only illuminated by signs and street lights, that was the only way he’d agree to go out into the city with you, in the dark. Fair enough, he didn’t want to attract attention to himself. Luckily, you’d made some good friends in the last few months, friends like Mike.

“Ah, bonjour!” Mike greeted cheerfully as you and Dark approached the window, before ducking into his shop to get you both a bowl of ice cream. “I was wondering if you were going to show up.”

You nudged Dark over to one of the tables and leaned in the window. “I didn’t mean for it to take so long, thanks for keeping the shop open late for us.”

“Don’t mention it. I actually have a cousin with really bad anxiety, so I get it.” He passed you two bowls with a smile.

Dark squinted at you when you came back to the table. ‘Anxiety?”

“Yeah?”

“I don’t have anxiety.”

“You’re right, I should’ve told him the truth. You and your sister possessed your best friend in the 1920′s to escape a place called the upside down, but sometimes you drag bits and pieces of it into the real world and that would probably scare the locals in broad daylight.” You didn’t miss a beat in your little rant, scooping some ice cream into your mouth as soon as you were done.

He chuckled and shook his head at you. “I’m supposed to be the one lecturing you on being subtle.”

“Hey, I’m the one who’s been covering for us the past 91 years. It’s your turn to follow my lead.” You said matter-of-factly, pointing your spoon at him, before you dove back into your bowl. You missed the ‘fair-enough’ nod he gave you and the pride written all over his face, another glimpse of someone you used to know. “You know, maybe you should bring you-know-who here someday.”

His eyes went wide and he shook your words off just a little too quickly. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“So you don’t have a thing for his new friend that you’re watching out for?”

“Stop it. Stop it right now.”

“Fine,” You put your hands up in mock surrender, “But you know I’m right.”

[lilsunshiny]

Thoughts on The Last Of Us Part II

WRITING (creative process)

the game’s storyline is straight to the point, you can see from the trailer that it’s going to be a timeline about revenge. the whole game happens around joel’s death in the beginning and I guess that’s the whole reason why people are upset. but guess what? neil druckmann’s goal was to make you upset, angry and nostalgic. he accomplished his goal and that’s why you’re feeling the way you are.

you not liking the the way things went down does not mean the game’s writing is awful, it just means you were expecting something and got another. not liking something isn’t a crime and it’s totally ok as long as you respect the creators and don’t use your hate to put others down, it’s a valid opinion and that’s it.

what makes a story good is the writing and the thought put into it to make the player/reader/viewer feel a certain way, and the developers did an incredible job to do that. we feel frustrated, anxious and weird the entire gameplay and that’s exactly what they wanted from us, which means they won. I’ll talk more about my opinion on the storyline far ahead.

the graphic visuals of this game are RIDICULOUS, they’re perfect. every detail is insane to look at, they worked so hard to get it right and it was so worth it. every time I entered a new scenario I would just go into photo mode and appreciate the art because that’s what makes the game unforgettable and groundbreaking. the red lighting scenes were so perfectly made and so badass, the sky when ellie goes outside the farm with JJ is breathtaking just like every other view in the game. by far the most beautiful game I’ve ever had the honor to play.

STORYLINE (joel’s death)

the first game gave us a story about love and hope, making us guide joel into taking ellie to the fireflies looking for a cure based on ellie’s immunity. we spend the whole game thinking we’d get to the fireflies, make a cure and live happily ever after but that never happened in those terms. the gameplay made us slowly fall in love with joel and ellie as characters, joel for his tough personality that would fade under the influence of a little girl and ellie for her nativity and innocence as a young teenager who really wants to help other people by making a cure. that’s the whole situation of it, joel getting attached to ellie while she developed a paternal affection for him but in the end joel ends up doing an unforgivable thing, basically destroying the hope for a cure and ruining all hope for the world to heal from the outbreak, so he decides to lie to ellie blaming the fireflies for everything so he doesn’t lose her trust and love.

I do understand liking and loving joel as a character, myself included, because they made the game thinking about it and they knew the audience would develop a major caring for him and ellie as daughter and father, that’s how it was supposed to go and it worked it.

now let’s talk about joel’s death. I think we were all surprised to watch him die so early in the game but considering the game time and storyline, it would have never happened differently. his death was brutal, violent, merciless and inhuman, abby and her crew tortured him until he couldn’t take it anymore and he obviously suffered with ellie being held to the ground begging them to stop. I agree that it was a horrible death but we can’t just pretend joel was a sweet innocent hero because he wasn’t, the audience portrays him as a hero when he literally stopped the human race from being saved, killing the fireflies and acting out of pure selfishness. joel isn’t the angel some people paint him as, he’s not a good person and if ellie herself could never forgive him for what he did, who are we to do so? she said she would try but she never got the chance to and it took her years to even come to terms with it.

most importantly, it’s obvious that people forget these characters are human beings, not real people but they’re real in that universe and technically speaking, they run and feel the same way we would feel if we were in their shoes. they’re people, every character in the game is a person, with feelings, a background, a past, a personality and thoughts. they’re no different than us except for them living in a post apocalyptic world were morality and ethics aren’t taken into consideration since there is no law or living lifestyle.

for us to understand this storyline, we need to step away from our society’s view of morality and wrong or right, because that does not apply to them, everyone in the game has killed people and/or have done something morally questionable in their life since it’s the apocalypse and there is no wrong or right, there’s only how the characters feel about certain situations and how they act on them, which is basically what guides the entire game to happening the way it did: human feelings.

joel obviously changed after the first game, since he starts living in jackson and having to raise ellie as a daughter in a relatively normal town with other people, he’s not the same person as he was in part I, now he turned into a father and a friend, not a merciless mercenary who doesn’t care about others. we see that when he and tommy decide to help abby, a complete stranger who was about to die in the hands of infected, and maybe that’s what led people into hating abby with their heart. but ending this topic, joel’s death was bound to happen, you can’t just expect someone to destroy the world’s hope for a cure and leave with no people being angry at him and wanting revenge, that cure could’ve saved many people’s loved ones but he chose to save his loved one. if joel is indeed a terrible person or not, that’s up to you to decide, that’s more of an internal turmoil within yourself that is different for everyone depending on their experience from part I and how they view joel in the end. it’s kind of messed up if you think about it, would you let the only person you care about die for a not confirmed chance of a cure in a world that is already doomed? that’s a question for yourself.

joel’s death happened so you could see things from multiple perspectives, which is the whole fucking point of the game. there are multiple sides to every story, it’s the same world we live in except in different circumstances. your actions affect others, people have feelings and if you hurt them they might act a certain way, those characters are no different than us because they were based on genuine human thoughts and actions.

ELLIE (growth and development)

ellie is one of the most well written characters I’ve ever seen in my life. she’s the symbol of badass but fragile woman and that’s so amazing to me. as the game goes by we start seeing many sides of ellie, she slowly starts to turn into a completely different person after joel’s death and her urge for revenge. killing abby becomes her main priority the second she leaves jackson and that’s clear in the way she acts and treats others. I’ll have to play the game again to pay more attention to ellie and abby’s behavior throughout the timeline. ellie is the reflection of how the excessive amount of effort you put into a negative thought, the more it will bring you and your loved ones down. watching ellie during the story is such a nice experience, there are times where you love her to death, others you get annoyed with her or don’t agree with how she acts, and that’s exactly how the creators wanted you to feel. revenge takes ellie’s soul from the inside out, from her not being able to forgive herself for letting joel die to her going after abby for nothing but hate for herself in the end.

ellie’s journey is exciting to play and to witness as her relationship with other people (specially dina) starts to fade away and being consumed by hate and regret. we were manipulated into loving ellie since part I and I don’t think she’s a bad person, she lost everything in the hands of other people and went through a lot, losing joel was a deal breaker for her but she just didn’t realize soon enough that killing abby wasn’t going to make things better. ellie’s gameplay was meant to make you reflect on losing a loved one, grief, mourning and revenge, she’s not the lost kid from part I anymore, she’s a grown woman who just lost her dad and she doesn’t even know exactly why. the funny thing for me, which is what makes the story realistic, is that ellie didn’t fully forgive joel yet she still suffered from losing him and went after abby for revenge, when not even herself could forgive him, that’s pretty realistic in my opinion. it’s the human uncontrollable instinct of still missing someone you’re mad at and not being able to say goodbye.

for me, ellie is the perfect and most detailed reflection of revenge and what it can do to you. the game is much more than “revenge is bad don’t do it”, we all obviously know it’s bad but we still have an urge to fight back against it and make the person who hurt us suffer too because it’s not fair for us and it wasn’t fair for ellie until the very last moment.

ABBY (point of view and perspective)

by far the most controversial character of the game. I’ll star off saying I actually like abby and I think the people who hate her so deeply just didn’t understand how things go. hating abby is no different than hating ellie, they’re in the same situation for almost the entire game. abby lost her father in joel’s hands, she was still a teenager and seeing her own dad die for trying to save humanity isn’t easy, just like ellie watching joel being tortured and killed wasn’t easy. being fully honest ellie would’ve done the same thing abby did if joel was the doctor and we can’t deny that.

on the other hand, I do think the ellie and abby gameplays could’ve been distributed better, maybe switching from ellie to abby and back and forth so it wouldn’t get too tiring or confusing since we don’t know the exact timeline when we first play it. that’s the only slightly negative thing I have to say about the game.

I do think abby is a great character, they built her perfectly to make the audience hate her in the begging, painting her as a sadistic monster only to show her side of the story later on in the game and make you realize that you have been wrong all this time, making you see the bigger picture and understand that ellie isn’t the only person in the world, she isn’t loved by everyone, she’s just a girl in the world and so is abby. they both have fucked up pasts and they both lost a lot, and in terms of personality, they’re actually quite similar. we love ellie because we got to see her grow up and WE know that deep down she’s not a bad person, the first impression we had of abby was of her recklessly killing joel with a golf club when ellie was begging her to stop, since that we tend to think abby is a horrible person and that ellie is an angel, but it’s not like that at all. obviously ellie didn’t do anything wrong up to that moment to justify that happening to her, but ellie isn’t the best person in the world either.

the duality in this game was created on purpose and with a deeper meaning, ellie is ellie, abby is abby and the cycle of revenge goes on until both parts understand that it’s useless to keep going. abby let go before ellie could and let her and dina live because of lev, killing joel didn’t change abby to the better, lev changed her. tommy couldn’t change ellie, jesse couldn’t change ellie and not even dina could do it, ellie had to change and forgive herself alone. the point I’m trying to make is that abby is no better than ellie and ellie is no better than abby, they’re both emotionally drained women who are not wrong or right in the end of things.

DINA (support and reflection)

dina is the only character I will 100% defend because she’s flawless and did absolutely nothing wrong during the whole game. in my head she represents ellie’s good side, dina is the constant reminder that ellie hasn’t lost her humanity and hasn’t completely changed into someone else because of revenge, even when she has her downs (example: calling her a burden when dina says she’s pregnant). dina is the most forgiving and loyal character, she loves ellie more than anything and it shows. the sad part of it is that even with dina’s huge amount of love and affection, that doesn’t stop ellie from going in the wrong direction, which brings us to another life lesson: loving someone is a choice you make everyday and nobody can control your choices when you’re determined to do something.

ellie decided to go after abby, dina followed and supported her the whole way through, then she took that for granted and left dina and JJ behind to go after abby again (after abby let her and dina live) officially breaking dina’s heart. that was a choice, dina obviously cared so much about ellie, loved her so much but she couldn’t change ellie’s mind. but the point here is that dina is a reflection of ellie’s bright side, she keeps ellie sane until the very last moment, saving her life multiple times, going with her in a revenge journey, “you go, I go, end of story”, telling the wolves to fuck off and staying by ellie’s side, constantly putting her life at risk while being pregnant, she has loves ellie for such a long time even before getting with jesse (you can read ellie’s journal where she says cat told her dina is jealous of their relationship) and she probably took ellie back when she came back from santa barbara (a theory that I believe in because it makes sense).

dina is one of the few positive ends in the universe of the last of us, highly optimistic, funny, beautiful and an amazing support system for ellie. if it weren’t for dina, ellie would’ve become a monster.

LGBTQ+ REPRESENTATION (ellie x dina and lev)

it’s 2020 and people are still talking shit about the game just because of queer characters. that’s why I say people who hate the game are people who either didn’t capture the story or just didn’t even try to pay attention because of a closed mindset bigot sandwiches. representation is the best path to general acceptance, making people see different stories and realize that someone’s gender or sexuality does not influence on the quality of art.

ellie is a lesbian, that’s clear in the game when she says she’s “not into jessie’s type” (such a nice dialogue by the way), she talks about her ex girlfriend and clearly has had a crush on dina for the longest time (probably the reason why she broke up with cat).

dina is bisexual, in my opinion she always had a crush on ellie but maybe she lost motivation to to after her when she started to get close to cat and started talking to jessie because of that and it ended up working.

now dina and ellie’s relationship is probably the only thing that keeps us sane throughout the game, when we sit down to think “thank god ellie has dina, that means she’s not alone”, which is basically the whole concept of it, ellie not being alone because dina is there to hold her to the ground and stop her from becoming someone she doesn’t want to be.

lev being trans is something I can‘t have an opinion on, I have seen both sides: people saying it was a good approach and others saying it wasn’t an accurate representation. I’m not trans so my opinion isn’t valid and I can definitely see why many people think it was a bad reach but I also can see the other side, so I won’t comment on that.

the nice thing about representation in this game is that they brought it up as a normal thing, the only moment the focus is sexuality is when seth was being a dick and called dina the d-word, ellie got defensive but dina stopped her from getting into a fight. even then the main focus of that situation was how ellie dealt with joel saying she didn’t need his help. the point was never ellie’s sexuality, never, not even in a single moment, because it was never an issue. in a post apocalyptic society people don’t pay much attention to being homophobes (unless they’re in a fanatic religious cult or just assholes like seth).

the game approached the subject very bluntly but in a normal way, not making it that huge of a deal but it is a big deal for those who seek comfort and/or are dealing with their sexuality in a way. if a character they admire ends up being part of a minority group, they can relate to that and feel more comfortable in their own skin. we’re here, we’re real and we exist even in a fucked up infected world.

ENDING + THOUGHTS (moving on)

the last of us part II is a story about revenge, being completely different than part I which is a story about love and surviving. what happens in the second game are the consequences of the first, the choices joel made reflected upon himself, saving ellie costed everything; the cure, people’s lives and maybe a brighter future. people who are bashing the game for it’s storyline and how things went down need to understand that it’s not because we love joel that his actions didn’t matter to others. joel is a human being, so is abby and those who got harmed by joel’s choice to save ellie. joel killed abby’s dad, abby went after him for revenge, a predictable and reasonable thing to do if you just try to see it from her point of view, keep in mind that ellie would do the same exact thing.

if you can’t get yourself to see things from other people’s point of view, you missed the whole point of the game. the storyline isn’t summed up in “revenge is bad don’t do it kids”, it’s just based on the fact that death can never and will never bring you any sort of relief.

the game is the reflection of the cycle of revenge. abby going after joel for killing her dad, ellie going after abby and killing all of her friends in the process, abby finally breaks the cycle letting ellie and dina live but ellie couldn’t get over the guilt and went after abby again, yet she ended up letting her ago and officially breaking the chain for good.

the whole concept of the game is how seeking someone else’s suffering can lead to full destruction of someone’s character and values.

if ellie had killed abby she would’ve turned into the monster she was fighting against and she would lose literally everything she hadn’t already lost: her humanity. I don’t actually know the exact reason that compelled ellie to let abby go, maybe it was losing her fingers and realizing that she’ll never be able to play guitar again, which was her very last memory of joel and what he taught her. it could also be thinking of lev and how he’s the only thing abby has and vice versa, which is what she had with joel and what was taken from her, therefore she didn’t want to turn into the person who put someone through the same pain she was going through. technically if she killed abby she would have to kill lev to avoid him coming after her and continuing the cycle and doing that would kill ellie even more.

to make this shorter, abby moved on earlier than ellie. mostly because abby actually got her revenge killing joel but you gotta look through things before you put all the blame on her. ellie lost everyone in her life, her parents, riley, tess, sam and then joel, going after abby was a defense mechanism since she couldn’t have done anything to save those she lost before, but losing the one who took care and raised her was something she couldn’t bare, specially when she thought joel was the only person she had even though they weren’t in good terms and she and dina weren’t a thing yet.

ellie needed to revenge joel at all costs because that’s what she thought he would want, but in the end she realizes he would want her to move on and be happy, because that’s what he always tried to give her: the best shot in life that he couldn’t give sarah. ellie thought that by killing abby she would be able to let go, when in reality she would just feel more guilty for leaving lev alone like she was having no emotional relief concerning her PTSD. ellie got to that beach fully aware that killing abby wasn’t going to solve any of her problems, but a single memory of joel made her make the decision that she wasn’t going to let her go without a fight. their final fight was silent, in the middle of nowhere, they had absolutely nothing to say to each other because they were both fighting for nothing but excessive mental emptiness. they both knew that nothing would bring their loved ones back and they were ready to move on.

what the game wants to teach you is that nothing good comes from searching revenge and other’s suffering. ellie gets consumed by her own view of justice and ends up losing herself both inside and outside, when she comes to terms with the fact that killing abby won’t bring joel back from the dead, it’s already too late. she lost jessie, her friendship with tommy, her good memories with joel, her fingers which results in her not being able to play guitar anymore, the love of her life and her son.

in the last of us part one ellie says that her biggest fear is to end up alone, and the saddest part of all is that her actions led her to making that fear come true. the ending is ambiguous, it can mean something different to different people depending on what you choose to interpret things and how you view the characters. for some, ellie could just end up alone looking for a life purpose that doesn’t involve anyone from her past. to others, ellie returned to jackson and proved dina that she loved her and that now she’s ready to fully commit because she let go of her anger and is at peace with herself and her inner struggles. but that’s all up to you to decide what you want to believe in.

at the end of the day, this storyline is beautiful, heartbreaking, breathtaking and emotionally draining. it makes you think and open your mind to new perspectives, which is honestly one of the best things art is able to do, create a new universe for you to deep your thoughts in and take your own conclusions. the last of us didn’t have a bad or good ending, it had a realistic ending. just because they didn’t make this the way you wanted it doesn’t mean the writing is bad, it means you’re probably disappointed and that’s fine, but hating on it isn’t the way to make a point.

I can only thank everyone involved for creating this world and making me so invested in it, connecting me with these amazing characters and emotions that I never experienced playing a game before. there is nothing more to say except: endure and survive.

[askaceattorney]

Dear askrikkaiandhyotei,

The...entire cast!?

Well, Turnabout Time Traveler happens to be favorite case anyway, so why not?

Our first guest is the crooked head servant, Mr. Dumas Gloomsbury.  (Might as well get him out of the way first.)

Of course he isn’t.  He’s just a disgruntled servant of the Sprocket family who secretly hates them all for what they’ve done to his reputation, even to the point of being willing to murder someone who would become the newest addition to the family, as well as destroying a prized possession designed by her groom-to-be.

So..........yeah.  Very likable guy.  Thankfully, he’s only on the scene for a brief moment before the titular “time travel” occurs.

That brings us to our next guest, Ms. Ellen Wyatt, soon to be Mrs. Ellen Sprocket, except for the fact that she’s been accused of murder.  Like most defendants, she doesn’t seem like the type to kill someone -- she’s calm, mild-mannered, and well put together.  Well...usually.

You didn’t expect 100% normalcy in a new character, did you?  Heck, we’re lucky to get 50% in this series.  Thankfully, the emotional Ms. Wyatt knows how to pull herself together in an instant.

Quite the enviable skill to have, isn’t it?

This beautiful bride-to-be wants nothing more than to be proven innocent so that she can be married to the one and only Sorin Sprocket of Sprocket Aviation.  Instead of seeking help from the Wright Anything Agency on her own, however, she’s brought to them by someone else.

That brings us to an unexpected guest from yesteryear (and an uninvited one):

Before getting to know Ellen, we’re abruptly introduced to a brand new Larry Butz with a brand new look!  ...And the same old smell, unfortunately.

He introduces “Elly” as his brand new fiance, much to Phoenix’s surprise (and everyone in the known universe’s), but it turns out to be another one of his usual romantic escapades.  What is true is that he helped his beloved Elly escape the room she was confined in, and even shook off the police for her.  Some might call this heroic...if they don’t know the Butz.  As someone who does know him, Phoenix delivers a line from his former mentor:

On the plus side, Larry’s been doing more than chasing women since we last saw him -- he held onto the name he borrowed from his late mentor and became a picture book author.

Not exactly what I’d expect someone in that field to look like, but progress is progress, I guess.

Moving back to “Elly,” she claims to be as clean and pure as her pure-white dress, as well as something else -- something that’s a bit harder to believe.

Like I said, normalcy doesn’t seem to come naturally to new Ace Attorney characters, but her explanation of how she was almost killed, traveled back in time, and saw history rewritten takes the abnormal cake, especially coming from someone as sound-minded as Ellen.  Or is she really as sound-minded as she looks?

We can only hope.

I love how she keeps everything she needs for housekeeping in one place, by the way, almost Mary Poppins-style.

Fast forwarding (no pun intended) through some re-introductions to Maya as our co-council and Edgeworth as the case’s prosecutor (something us long-time Ace Attorney fans can’t help but love), we’re eventually introduced to the master himself, Mr. Sorin Sprocket, who has his own personality quirks...or rather, a severe lack of personality.

Like many genius inventors, he isn’t very social (his preferred method of communication being the paper airplane message), and always seems to be lost in his thoughts until someone pulls him back into reality.  Even stranger than that, he doesn’t seem the least bit worried about his fiance’s trial.  In Phoenix’s his words, he isn’t the easiest guy to wrap your head around.

On top of that, he has his own thing to say about time travel:

He and Ellen apparently both believe in time travel, but apart from that, they don’t seem to have much in common.  In fact, having met the two of them, one might think they’re polar opposites of each other, and...well, they’d be right, but as we learn later on, there’s more to Sorin’s silence than just an obsession with his work.

And speaking of obsession...

Our next guest, while also quite abnormal, is a bit more level-headed than the previous new characters.  He’s well-mannered, detail-oriented, shrewd, and takes the utmost care of Sorin.  Not to mention he's tech-savvy enough to fix a broken radio in a matter of seconds.

I’m surprised Phoenix and Maya didn’t consider the possibility of him being a machine himself, like they did with Lisa Basil.

He happens to have one of my favorite pun names, by the way.  Besides being clever and describing him perfectly, it almost sounds like it could be a real person’s name.

While Mr. Nichody does a good job of being the least interesting character thus far, it turns out that he and his “expensive good luck charm” play one of the most important roles in this case.  Not to mention he gives the biggest piece of foreshadowing in the episode:

Funny he should say that when there’s a spirit medium right in front of him, but I guess he doesn’t have time for unimportant details like that.

As the story goes on and the revelations start pouring in, we learn about Sorin’s older sister Selena, who was originally going to be the next president of Sprocket Aviation.  This, unfortunately, was not to be...

The sudden loss of his sister provides an explanation for his closed-off attitude and interest in time machines, but the mysteries surrounding that tragic day are only beginning.

We also learn that Mr. Nichody believes Ellen is guilty of her alleged crime, and for that reason, he’s strongly opposed to letting her marry Sorin.  Could he be right in doubting her, or is there something else behind is disapproval?  Ellen doesn’t seem that bad, after all.  Just a little...what’s the term?

There you go.

Then comes one of the bigger twists -- it turns out Sorin and his in-laws were responsible for Ellen’s supposed trip through time, which turned out to be an elaborate scheme to make her believe her near-death experience with Gloomsbury was only a dream.  Or so says Nichody, at least.

But once again, this is only the beginning.

Even with the possibility of time travel ruled out, Ellen’s guilt hasn’t been disproved just yet.  The only hope Phoenix has is the person she claims she saw attacking Gloombury before losing consciousness.  Unfortunately, the only suspect he can come up with so far is her fiance, thus introducing the possibility of him having to take her place in prison.

Considering every case up until now has had some form of happy ending, it’d be quite the unusual turn of events for this happy couple to have to be separated whether we win or lose the case...but is it impossible?

As tragic as that possibility might be, it sets up a scene that happens to be one of my favorite kinds -- one where someone is compelled to give up something, even if it’s his or her own life, purely out of love for someone else.

Her words are touching, but soon after saying them, she’s forced to prove just how steadfast her love is for Sorin, even in a cruel twist of fate -- namely, his pointing the blame for Gloomsbury’s death in her direction.

That face alone is enough to break anyone’s heart, but thankfully, that’s where the plot twists just begin.  The first one reveals that Sorin went to rescue his bride-to-be in the most bizarre way possible.

Then it turns out he really didn’t, or so he says.  Then it turns out he was attacked by Gloomsbury along with Ellen.  Then comes one that turns everything he’s said so far upside-down:

It turns out time travel is possible, but not in the way everyone was hoping, or in a way anyone would want -- due to his anterograde amnesia, Sorin “goes back in time” whenever he goes to sleep.  This revelation sheds a lot of light on his personality, his compulsive note-taking, and his feelings toward Ellen.  Not to mention, it turns out (sheesh, I keep saying that) he was responsible for the car crash that took his sister’s life.  But luckily, that's not all his condition reveals.

Someone decided to take advantage of Sorin’s memory being dependent on what he writes in his notebook in order to paint him as Gloomsbury’s murder.  Who might that someone be?  Well, for anyone who’s read the works of Sir Arthur Conan Doyle (or enough murder mysteries involving rich families), it should be pretty obvious -- the butler did it!

But what motive could a close friend and servant have for manipulating Sorin’s memories?  Well, like many an Ace Attorney culprit, he’s not as level-headed as he appears to be.

The rogue butler in this case turns out to be the once-fiance of Sorin’s sister, as well as the one who operated on her after the car accident occurred...or, rather, who almost did.

After some impromptu x-rays and the testimony that wasn’t there, we finally learn the whole truth about Nichody, Gloomsbury, and the plot to exact their revenge on Sorin and his bride.  It turns out Sorin wasn’t the only one stuck in the past.

In a beautiful yet tragic symbolism, Selena’s pocket watch stopped ticking on the same day her heart stopped beating, which, for Nichody, was the day time stopped.

This brings us to our final guest, one who could only be here in spirit -- Ms. Selena Sprocket.  In Ellen’s words, Selena would’ve said, “Leave this ill will behind.  Your time is yours to live.”  To an inconsolable time traveler, these words hold no meaning, but just then...

Whether it’s a coincidence or a message from Selena from beyond (which might actually be believable in the Ace Attorney universe), Pierce is reminded that, sooner or later, time moves on.

And on that note, Ellen and Sorin are finally able to move on from this rough patch in their lives and experience their “First Startup of Love.”

Speaking of the happy couple, the one thing that stuck with me about this episode more than Nichody’s epiphany is how devoted Ellen is to Sorin from beginning to end.

With the knowledge that he might forget everything about her, himself, their wedding, and any other experiences they might share together, her devotion to him is ultimately proven to be the real deal.  His willingness to risk his life for her also proves that this devotion goes both ways.  In the end, there’s nothing, past, present, or future, that can keep them apart.  Why, you ask?

And hey, even Larry found it in himself to move on!  How about that?

Thus ends a beautiful story, a beautiful reunion of the original characters, and a beautiful finale(?) to the Ace Attorney series.  Sure, there was tragedy along the way, but after an ending like that, I’d like to see each of these characters, new and old, take a bow.

Just...don’t throw them any flowers.

-The Co-Mod

[bbclesmis]

Daily Mail: The original superhero: An ex-con with the strength of an ox and a passion for justice – Dominic West on playing Valjean in the BBC’s epic new version of Les Mis

Dominic West, 49, is set to star in Andrew Davies' adaptation of Les Misérables

The story written originally by Victor Hugo in 1862 became a hit film in 2012

The French novel is also the longest-running musical in the West End

Dominic says the story's Jean Valjean is the best superhero that’s ever written

He shared his thoughts on the challenge of bringing new complexity to the role

Dominic West walks into the room sporting a huge grin, sideburns, rust-coloured breeches, a scarf that makes him look instantly French... and a sore throat.

‘I’ve almost lost my voice,’ he croaks.

He’s midway through filming the BBC’s epic new adaptation of Les Misérables when we meet, so this is far from ideal. But he’s undeterred.

‘I’ve been shouting for justice for too long,’ he laughs.

Many drama fans will know Victor Hugo’s classic 1862 novel from the popular musical adaptation that has been playing in London since 1985, making it the longest-running musical ever in the West End.

It was turned into an Oscar-winning film in 2012 with Hugh Jackman, Anne Hathaway and Russell Crowe, but this six-part TV series – with no singing at all – goes much deeper into a story encompassing the nature of justice, the misery of humankind and the redemptive quality of love.

Dominic West, 49, revealed the complexity behind his role as ex-criminal Jean Valjean in the TV adaptation of Les Misérables. Pictured left to right: Madame Thénardier (Olivia Coleman) and her husband (Adeel Akhtar), Fantine (Lily Collins) holding a young Cosette, Valjean and Javert (David Oyelowo)

The epic tale focuses on ex-criminal Jean Valjean, his policeman nemesis Javert, and a host of characters they meet on their respective journeys through France between 1815 and 1832.

After being released from prison, where he was incarcerated for stealing a loaf of bread for his starving sister but kept in jail for 19 years for continually trying to escape, Valjean is an embittered man until an act of incredible kindness from a village priest, played by Derek Jacobi, makes him vow to turn over a new leaf.

But he soon discovers that having to show his ex-criminal papers wherever he roams means he’s unable to find work, and finds he’s being pursued by Javert because he’s failed to check in with the authorities after his release.

Six years on, he has become a wealthy factory owner in the town of Montreuil-sur-Mer.

He has a new name, is well regarded as a philanthropist and no one knows his past.

It’s there that he meets single mother Fantine, who has turned to prostitution after being sacked from his factory.

Her daughter Cosette is being brought up by the Thénardiers, a couple of thieves who run an inn, and she can’t afford to pay them.

Valjean promises to look after Cosette for the dying Fantine, but first he must flee from Javert, who’s on his heels.

The action then turns to Paris in 1832, where cholera is rife and the streets are ablaze with anti-monarchy protests.

Valjean and a now teenage Cosette are living there, but both the Thénardiers and Javert are in the capital too.

It’s a dangerous time for everyone, but as well as tragedy in the closing scenes, there is love, redemption and forgiveness.

As the series has been adapted by the king of costume drama Andrew Davies, the man who sexed up Pride And Prejudice and War And Peace, we can expect a lighter touch – as well as more nakedness – than is to be found in the average retelling of the French classic.

Andrew Davies says the musical version of Les Misérables failed to get to the heart of the story, in his version he includes various elements of love. Pictured: Marius (Josh O'Connor) and Cosette (Ellie Bamber) fall deeply in love with each other

The musical, he says, was ‘a shoddy farrago’ that failed to get to the heart of the story, whereas his version will.

‘The story has all those elements of love: romantic love, maternal love, filial and sibling love.

'It looks at those universal themes of how we live a good life.

'But it’s about much more than that.

'We live in a society that’s as divided into rich and poor as the society Hugo was talking about.

'Now, as then, there are people who end up on the streets if something goes wrong.’

Dominic, 49, is cast as the lead character Valjean, a beast of a role that he’s clearly relishing, despite his croaky voice.

‘Jean Valjean is the best superhero that’s ever been written,’ he says.

It’s a very emotional story. I’m in tears all day - Dominic West                        

‘He’s amazing. If he’s not saving kids or fighting villains, then he’s climbing up ships’ masts to save some sailor.

'It’s a very emotional story. I’m in tears all day.

'Really, I can’t stop crying. I just love this man. He’s such a good guy.

'Usually it’s hard to make good guys interesting so that people really care about them.

'But he’s fighting all the time – not only with Javert who’s on his tail, but also with his own demons.

'The odds are stacked against him, the world is stacked against him, and yet he manages to be a good guy when all the pressures around him are urging him to be bad.

'Our lives are nothing like his, but we are having slightly tougher political times right now.

Ooh la la love triangle!                                                            

While the heart of the story is about Jean Valjean and Javert, there’s another intriguing relationship in Les Misérables – between Eponine who loves Marius, and Marius who loves Cosette.

‘Marius is passionately in love with Cosette, but in my version he keeps having dreams about Eponine,’ says writer Andrew Davies.

‘That leaves him terribly upset and feeling like he’s betrayed Cosette.

'It’s not in the original text, but Eponine does keep coming into his room and I thought about how unsettling that must be to a lusty young man.’

Eponine, played by Erin Kellyman, is the daughter of Thénardier, who goes to Paris after losing his inn, but she’s nothing like her thieving father.

She meets Marius when they share the same boarding house and falls in love with him.

Eponine (Erin Kellyman, pictured) suffers unrequited love in Les Misérables as she loves Marius but his heart belongs to Cosette

But he’s in love with Fantine’s daughter Cosette, who as a girl was brought up with Eponine by the Thénardier family but is now, after her mother’s death, the charge of the rich philanthropist Jean Valjean.

‘Eponine’s story is so sad because she tries so hard to impress Marius and he’s not interested at all,’ says Erin, best known for her role as rebel Enfys Nest in Solo: A Star Wars Story.

‘So she resorts to doing what she can to make him happy rather than making herself happy.

'Everyone knows what unrequited love feels like – but not quite to this extent.’

Josh O’Connor, who’s cast as Marius, admits he enjoyed having two beautiful girls in love with him.

‘He’s madly in love with Cosette, but his feelings about Eponine creep up on him.’

Nocturnal Animals star Ellie Bamber, who appears as Cosette, says audiences will see a new side to her character.

‘You see her past a lot more – she’s been through abuse and had to grow up fast,’ says Ellie, who first played Cosette in a school musical.

‘But she goes on a journey, falls in love, confronts her abusers and is a symbol of hope.’

'We’re looking for a hero and he could be that guy.

'I’ve got kids, and I’m at that age now where I don’t want to be a villain.

'It’s much more interesting when people are trying to be good when the world is against them.’

Dominic, whose naked bottom is seen within the first half hour of the show (‘It’s all mine!’ he laughs), says it took a lot of preparation to play Valjean, who is notable for his strength.

‘It took me about ten years to read the book,’ he jokes.

‘I also did a bit of boxing training, which almost killed me.’

The pressure Valjean comes under is mainly created by Javert, played by David Oyelowo, who’s best known for appearing as Martin Luther King in the film Selma.

He first meets Valjean in prison, where he’s astounded by the prisoner’s strength.

Fantine sells her hair, her teeth – and then herself - Lily Collins

When Valjean fails to report to the authorities after his release, Javert is on his tail and some years later mysteriously turns up in the village where Valjean – without revealing his past – has become mayor.

‘Javert is the villain, but while in the musical you see him only in primary colours, in this mini-series we see his many layers,’ says David, 42.

‘When I was offered the job I realised there was an opportunity to bring complexity and dimension to a character who’s largely been marginalised as a villain.’

Andrew Davies says he believes Javert’s obsession with Valjean may have a sexual element to it.

‘He may possibly be in love with him, in a strange way,’ he says.

‘If you think about it, their relationship with each other is the closest either of them has to romantic love in the story.’

Derek Jacobi (pictured) plays a priest who reforms Valjean with an incredible act of kindness

But David admits he chose to see other motivations for Javert’s preoccupation with catching Valjean.

‘Javert sees Valjean as a mirror to himself,’ he says.

‘Javert was born in a prison to gypsy parents.

'He was born in and around criminality, and that’s the thing he’s been pushing away from, obsessively, all his life. He’s trying to kill off that side of himself.’

Dominic says the rivalry between the two characters became easier to understand as soon as they gave Valjean a northern accent and Javert a southern one, playing on regional rivalries that will be familiar to British audiences even if it isn’t authentically French.

‘We had a bit of trouble at first, thinking why is Javert so obsessed with this dude,’ he says.

‘But it all became easier when David started doing Javert in a southern accent and I started doing Valjean in a Yorkshire one, because I’m originally from Sheffield.’

More than anything it’s a study of goodness - Dominic West  

The casting was deliberately colourblind, with Adeel Akhtar, who has Pakistani and Kenyan heritage and is best known for his role in Unforgotten last year, as the thieving innkeeper Thénardier and David, whose parents were both Nigerian, playing the key villain.

It may cause raised eyebrows, but David insists it’s time.

‘The thing that’s often overlooked is that we’re taking a 150-year-old French novel and transposing it onto English life,’ he says.

‘We have long striven to make these older texts relevant to a contemporary audience, and this is just an extension of that.’

David and Dominic have been filming in a picturesque cobbled street in Brussels, where much of the Paris action in the series takes place – Paris is now too modern to play itself.

Dominic revealed he prepared for his role as Valjean (pictured as a prisoner) with boxing training

Shopfronts have been aged, satellite dishes and street signs covered up, cars replaced by horses and there’s a market in full swing outside a church with dozens of extras dressed in smocks.

There are even dog carts, which were used to transport goods at the time, being led by Great Swiss Mountain Dogs.

This is where we will first meet another of the key characters, Fantine, played by Lily Collins, the 29-year-old daughter of singer and drummer Phil.

In the musical we see only the end of her life, but here we will see the light that preceded the darkness.

The scene being filmed today shows her walking with friends to a dance, where she meets Felix, played by Johnny Flynn, who will seduce her and leave her with a baby, Cosette.

‘I love the musical, and playing Fantine is a dream come true,’ says Lily.

‘We get to flesh out the storyline we’ve never seen performed before.

'What is just a lyric in a song in the musical takes up an entire episode. We get to see Fantine fall in love and have her heart broken.’

Because of the vagaries of filming – and having to accommodate a stellar cast’s busy schedules – Lily filmed Fantine’s downfall first, before portraying the happier early part of her life.

As a single mother, her daughter is being brought up by the increasingly avaricious Madame Thénardier, played by Olivia Colman, and when Fantine loses her job in Jean Valjean’s factory in Montreuil she’s forced to sell her hair, then her teeth, then herself to make money.

Olivia Colman stars as Madame Thénardier (pictured) who brings up Fantine's daughter

But even that isn’t enough.

‘I did her death scene on my second day of filming,’ says Lily.

‘It was snowing and minus 13 degrees.

'The snow and the cold, the rags and the cobbles all helped me do the scene but it’s one of the hardest things I’ve ever done.

'By the end she has no hair and her front teeth are missing; the make-up and costume departments did the most extraordinary job.

'I sent my mum a photo of what I looked like and she said, “Oh God, no mother should ever see her child like that.”

'But being unable to recognise myself physically helped me transform myself, I’m really grateful for it.’

Lily says she had a brief chat with Anne Hathaway, who won an Oscar for playing Fantine in the film, about this tragic story.

‘I met her at a fashion event and she said hello to me. I got all nervous and said, “I’m playing you... well, not you, Fantine.”

She said, “Don’t lose yourself in the role because it can get really tough.” And she was right.

'As an actor I’ve never gone that low and it was hard to cling onto reality.’

The series, like the book, is set in the 17 years after the Battle of Waterloo in 1815.

The devastation of the battle opens the series in a powerful scene where we see innkeeper Thénardier robbing the bodies of dead soldiers. When he pulls a horse off one corpse to steal from him, the soldier is still alive.

The real Valjean     

The character of Jean Valjean was partly inspired by a real-life reformed villain, Eugène François Vidocq, who spent much of his life on the run.

A teenage tearaway who stole from his own family, his early years were spent in and out of jail and he also deserted from the army.

But that all changed when he witnessed the execution of an old friend and former thief.

Les Misérables's Jean Valjean was inspired by real-life reformed villain, Eugène François Vidocq (pictured)

He turned police informer and philanthropist, set up a factory for ex-convicts and even, in 1828, lifted up a heavy cart that had fallen onto one of his workers.

Revered as the ‘father’ of modern criminology, he set up his own detective agency and is credited with the introduction of undercover work, ballistics and he even made the first plaster cast impressions of shoe prints.

His first memoir was printed in 1829 and as well as inspiring Victor Hugo, who is said to have created both Jean Valjean and Javert from Vidocq’s story, he was also written about by Balzac, Alexander Dumas, Edgar Allan Poe, Herman Melville and Charles Dickens.

Thinking Thénardier was there to help him, he demands the name of his saviour.

That man is Colonel George Pontmercy, the father of another of the key characters, Marius.

And in another strand to the story that will be new for fans of the musical who haven’t read the book, we learn about Marius’s upbringing.

Born into an aristocratic family, he is raised largely by his royalist grandfather Monsieur Gillenormand, played by the Harry Potter and Game Of Thrones star David Bradley, because his father is off fighting and his mother is dead.

When his father returns from battle, Gillenormand refuses to allow him to see his son because he’s so disgusted he fought for the rebel Napoleon.

But when Marius – a role taken by The Durrells actor Josh O’Connor – grows up he discovers more about his father and becomes a rebel himself.

‘He comes from a well-to-do background and then he turns into a socialist to fight for the people,’ says Josh.

‘The book is partly about social injustice, but you have these beautiful themes of redemption.’

As the story moves on, we see the characters interlink against the backdrop of a volatile Paris, as Marius falls for Cosette and Thénardier’s daughter Eponine falls for Marius, while Javert pursues Valjean.

‘All of human nature is here,’ says Dominic.

‘Guilt, revenge, injustice, triumph and love – but more than anything else this is a study of goodness.

'It makes goodness interesting and that is quite rare.’  

Les Misérables starts tomorrow at 9pm on BBC1.

(x)

[freewillacquired]

Dead in the Water

Oneshot Fanfiction Story (muse: Matt Addison)

[Author’s notes: I had a really bad day today and it left me feeling angry and upset, and sometimes when that happens I end up experiencing a random act of writing, heh. This oneshot came to me as I was listening to music, specifically Dead in the Water by Ellie Goulding. By the end of the song, I knew I needed to write this or I wasn’t getting any sleep tonight. It’s been a while since I’ve been that inspired to write something immediately, so maybe it wasn’t such a bad day after all. I hope you enjoy it.]

@realprojectalice​

He wasn’t breathing, but he didn’t need to anymore. He didn’t feel hot or cold. He didn’t feel anything at all. At least… not physically.

Matt remembered everything now. All that had transpired in the Hive and all that came after were as clear to him now as if it had happened yesterday. The last thing he remembered was protecting Alice from the helicopter. Yes, that was him too, the disgustingly and horrifically mutated beast known as the Nemesis. He didn’t remember himself then, not really. There hadn’t been enough time for that. Alice was the only point of light to shine through the shattered remains of his memories and sanity, muddied by months of torture and experimentation. Barely… just barely… he had begun to remember her with the apology she gave him, her kindness cutting through his rage like a red-hot knife through a solid block of ice. She was only a feeling, a warmth, the notion of a friend in his lonely, confused, and frightened mind… but that had been enough for him to want to protect her. Just that shred of a connection had brought him more happiness in that short moment than all the previous months of his life combined. There had been no friendship in Dr. Isaacs’s laboratory. No kindness. No mercy. No explanation. Alice’s tearful and distraught apology to him healed it all, but there just hadn’t been enough time, before they were torn apart yet again. He protected her with his life. Then why was he here… in the Hive, of all places?

He remembered Alice now. Fully. He remembered… everything. Except how he got here.

Matt looked down at his hands. They were human again, his hands, not the thick, oversized, mutated things he had by the time Dr. Isaacs was through with him. Looking past his hands, he stared at the water below. It was everywhere. It lapped at the metal and glass walls and cast a surreally beautiful array of illuminated colors on the ceiling. He was calm as he stood staring at those lights, wondering at their beauty in this place of fear and death. They were out of place in his opinion, but not unwelcome.

The water wasn’t lapping at his own legs, though. It flowed right through him, unencumbered. He couldn’t even feel it. Walking as easily as he would have without the few feet of water that surrounded him, Matt wandered the death traps that had once been Umbrella laboratories. Bodies floated like dead fish in sealed tanks behind glass walls, their eyes wide but seeing nothing. He watched them too, just as he had watched the lights, before moving on.

The silence was deafening, the loneliness palpable. He wasn’t afraid, no, not like he’d been the last time he was down here. Matt had feared for his life then, but now there was no more life left in him to lose. He understood this as he realized he had no reflection in the glass or in the water. It was like he didn’t exist at all, and like time had stopped, for the place was the picture of death and destruction and yet… utterly silent. Like a movie set without the actors. Or a body without a soul. Shades of grays and blues permeated the scenery as he wandered the labs, looking at all the clip boards, mushy papers, office supplies, and pieces of laboratory equipment that were floating in the water. All of them were things that no longer mattered, so trivial and almost laughably simple in their design and function, paling against the horror that had ended so many lives in this accursed place.

He looked to the door when an undead man wandered in. A small furrow came to Matt’s brow. Inside that moment, without any fear or sense of urgency, he could watch the man move and consider him objectively. Uncoordinated, lumbering, pushing through the water with great difficultly. A shell without a purpose… a symbol of the worst parts of human nature. The man walked right next to him – Matt calmly moved out of his way – without reacting to him at all. There was nothing to say that he would understand, no help Matt could offer him. There was nothing to be done for any of them anymore.

There were others like that one, and there were dogs, too. Half-decayed, roaming Doberman breeds wandered where he could see them, swimming in the water, scavenging for any living flesh they could find. He stopped and considered them too. How terrified he had been of them, once. Now he pitied the poor things, for they had been just animals and had not understood what was happening to them, and unlike the undead humans wandering the labs of the Hive, they were not responsible for any of this.

One swam in his direction now and Matt held his ground, expecting it to pass him by as the undead man had. It didn’t. Instead, it stood in the water some feet away, the water lapping at its shoulders and back, licking away little flaps of rotting flesh from its body. Watching him with both of its yellow, cloudy eyes, the dog sniffed the air as it looked right at him before deciding Matt was nothing it wanted. As it swam past him, Matt curiously wondered why the dog could see him and the man could not. Some say animals can sense things that people can’t. That they can even see the spirits of the dead. Why would they be any different now as they were when they were living? Indeed, all the dogs seemed to notice him to varying degrees, but they did not stay long, pushing onward for sustenance in other half-submerged rooms.

Matt understood that he was dead, of course. That realization had come a while ago. What he had yet to figure out was why he was here. If he was dead, shouldn’t he move on to… something? Somewhere? He was not a particularly religious person when he was alive, but then again he hadn’t believed in ghosts until he became one himself. If ghosts are real, was heaven? Hell? This wasn’t the Afterlife, though. This was just… the Hive. So what was he doing here?

A metal-lined walkway and a thick door with a small set of stairs leading down into even deeper water sent a flood of emotions through him. He remembered this room, and the choices that were made within it. He found out exactly what kind of person Spencer was in this room. He also found out what kind of people Alice and Rain were, too. This room was permeated with their energies, all of them. Smiling a little, he was happy at first, but then so very sad. Grief built up inside him and he wanted to cry, but he couldn’t anymore… could he? Soon enough, he felt like he was, though no tears fell from his eyes. He missed Alice and Rain so much. They were gone from this place – and Rain was gone from this world – but Matt could feel them, right here. So he stopped wandering… and stayed. Here, where Spencer had heartlessly locked them all in. Here, where the Red Queen had callously demanded Rain’s life. Here, where Rain had bravely offered her life so that he and Alice could leave. Here, where Alice vehemently refused to kill Rain to save herself.

Here. They’re all here.

It was just their energies, though, not really them. For one as lonely as Matt, though, it was enough to make him want to remain in that room. Matt used to watch those ghost hunting shows before all of this happened. Looking around, feeling and almost seeing the events that had transpired in this room replayed like a movie, he knew what this was. A residual haunting. An imprint had been made here, left behind by people’s energies whether living now or dead, that had made such an emotional impression that it was burned into history, replayed over and over and over again. It was like they were right there with him, Rain and Alice. Rain’s energy was edgy and strong. It was a good energy, a noble one, deep down. Alice’s energy was distraught and volatile, desperate but determined. Hers was strong too, but in a different way. He missed it. He missed her. That’s when it occurred to him…

Alice is why I’m here.

Down in the Hive, they had struggled so much together. Memories of Alice saturated his last hours as himself, before Dr. Isaacs stole most of his memory away, first with drugs and then with torture. The fights, the running, their white-knuckle escape, all of that was crystal clear, yes, but also… just… her eyes. Her strength. His admiration for her. There was so much he needed to say to her, so much left unfinished between them. He didn’t have the chance above ground in Raccoon City, and even if he had, Isaacs had stolen his ability to properly tell her when he took away his lips.

He owed Alice so much, and he couldn’t even say specifically what, but… he just felt that he owed her some amount of thanks. Thanks… for getting me through this. Thanks… for giving me hope. Thanks… for showing me how beautiful survival can be when the right souls come together. And it didn’t matter to him that that survival had not lasted for him. It didn’t matter that he’d been experimented on afterward, or that she’d nearly killed him when they fought in Raccoon City, or that he’d died protecting her. She’d call all of those things failures – her failures – but Matt didn’t see it that way. Fate had been cruel to them both. She was as much a victim as he was. What happened to him had been no one’s fault but Isaacs’. Umbrella’s. He didn’t want her to blame herself for anything, but least of all for what happened to him.

And he couldn’t rest until he told her that.

He knew she was still alive. Alice wouldn’t be taken down easily at all. The thought made him smile as he watched the lapping water. It sounded so peaceful around him. Benign. Ordinary. Revealing nothing of the raw horror of this place and the strife that had occurred here. He listened to its sounds as he stood by one of the walls, folding his arms. Would he remain here forever in this tomb? A truly dead man among the walking undead? Dead in this water?

Will I ever be able to thank Alice for her friendship, her courage, and her humanity?

I’ll wait forever for the chance.

[planarchaosproject]

Planar Chaos: Before The Spark

Whatever it takes

Eleanor heaved a sigh, hanging her coat on the rack near the door of her family's modest home. At eighteen she was young for a cathar, but not overly so. Thalia had ascended to the same rank at an even younger age than she had. The young woman sighed. She'd been promised to the order from a young age and worked as a mausoleum guard in the small town her family lived in.

"Ellie?"

"I'm here, Ash."

The back door to their house shut and her sister, three years her junior, practically flew through the house to embrace her.

"Ash, what did I tell you about being outside during the Hunter's moon?"

"But it's so pretty tonight," Ashleigh protested.

Eleanor looked down at her little sister, all big green eyes and curls the color of dried blood. She shuddered at the comparison. Is that where her mind dwelled these days? On death? She supposed it had something to do with Ashleigh's being promised by their father to the Runechanters. She'd leave to start her training in a few months, once the darkness of Hunter's Moon was over and it was once again time for New Moon. Eleanor couldn't deny her jealousy. There was learned magic, of course, but being born with the capability made one a better candidate for the specialized orders of the Church of Avacyn.

"I know you like the stars, Ash, but there are werewolves out there. It's getting harder for me and the others to keep the town safe."

"Are you sure you can anymore?"

"Ash, where's this coming from?" Eleanor asked. Something in her sister's voice and expression caught her off guard.

"You all pray all the time, you draw your symbols, and nobody comes to help you. Only Avacyn can hear our prayers, right? The other angels can't do that? So why doesn't Avacyn come to help you?"

"Someone else somewhere else needs her more than we do." Eleanor answered automatically, almost like she didn't believe it herself. She'd never seen Avacyn herself. The archangel had never answered her prayers. Perhaps they weren't fervent enough. Then again, Eleanor hadn't seen any of the archangels, leaders of the main flights. The other three, Gisela, Bruna, and Sigarda, were powerful but not omnipotent. They lacked the ability to answer prayers.

Ashleigh looked up at her sister. Eleanor's dirty blonde braid was falling out, and her eyes were dark with exhaustion. Why couldn't Avacyn see how much Eleanor needed her?

She'd come to a conclusion that she'd been hiding, not just from Ellie, but their whole family. Ashleigh firmly believed Avacyn had abandoned humanity, or at least that she wasn't as powerful as she seemed. If Avacyn couldn't beat the darkness that tried nightly to consume everything, how strong was she? How strong were any of them? True power didn't lie with the light her sister served. True power existed in the darkness she fought.

"Ash?" Eleanor gave her sister a shake.

"What? Sorry," Ashleigh said, snapping out of her thoughts. She yawned.

"You're tired. Let's get on to bed. Mother and Father will want us well rested for tomorrow."

"What's so special about tomorrow?" Ashleigh asked.

"It's another day."

00000

The next day dawned with Eleanor in a cold sweat. She stared at the ceiling, unmoving and unresponsive to everyone but her sister.

"Ellie," Ashleigh sobbed, gripping her sister's limp hand. "Ellie, what's wrong?"

They were alone, their parents having gone into the town to send for a specialist to treat Eleanor.

"Ash," Eleanor croaked, "I can hardly hear myself think. It's so loud… They're all so loud…"

"Who is?" Ashleigh pleaded. "Ellie, please, who is so loud?"

"The voices. I can barely hear you over them, they hurt my head."

"What can I do to fix it, Ellie?" Ashleigh begged. "Anything, I'll do anything."

"Avacyn will restore me, Ash." Ellie's eyes were as hollow as her voice. "We just have to have faith."

Faith? Ashleigh sighed inwardly. She didn't think an angel could cure her sister. Angels didn't have any power anymore. The neighbors had been mauled by werewolves in the night, or maybe the neighbors were werewolves. It was hard to tell these days.

"Just do this for me, Ashleigh," Eleanor whispered. "Pray with me."

Ashleigh took her sister's hands, bowed her head, and listened to Eleanor pray.

"Avacyn, greatest of the angels, we pray that your healing light shine upon us, that your strength guard our souls, and let us pass into the Blessed Sleep undisturbed by forces of evil." The prayer thus uttered, Eleanor fell into a deep sleep.

When their parents returned hours later, they were accompanied by a priest who examined Eleanor's sleeping body. He gave Ashleigh a wide berth for whatever reason. Something about the young woman, little more than a girl, unnerved him.

"She requires rest and the attentions of one far more powerful than I. We must summon an angel to dispel this curse."

"An angel?" Ashleigh sputtered.

"You sound incredulous, young one. Have you never encountered one of our protectors?" The priest asked.

"No," Ashleigh admitted. "They don't come here. Nothing important enough happens to get their attention."

"Ashleigh," her mother cautioned, placing a hand on her husband's arm to keep him from striking their daughter for her insolence.

"I've never seen an angel, mom," Ashleigh said. "I'd only be right to assume it's because someone somewhere else needs them more than we do."

"We need to let Ellie rest," her mother said. "Everyone, let's retire to the main room. Dear," she turned to her husband, "I'm sure there are some things that need to be done in the stables. The farrier should be by today to fit a new shoe for the bay plowhorse."

"Ash," Ellie rasped.

"What is it, dear?" Their mother asked.

"Ash, stay, please," Ellie hadn't opened her eyes.

"I don't think that's such a good idea," the priest whispered to their father.

"Ellie, Ashleigh will come with us. You need your rest," their father put a firm hand on Ashleigh's upper arm, gave it a sharp squeeze that sent his fingers right into the seam between two muscles and caused the younger daughter to wince and reluctantly leave her sister's side.

"Ash," Ellie breathed, her voice growing weak.

"They have a powerful bond," the priest observed after they shut the door behind them.

"They always have," their mother said. "Ellie wouldn't leave her side after she was born."

"I have some concerns about that," the priest said. "Her lack of faith might be what's causing Eleanor's affliction."

"I'm right here," Ashleigh said.

She was ignored.

"When New Moon comes," her father said, "Ashleigh will leave here to go train as a Runechanter. She's shown some signs of magical talent."

"And you're certain it's natural?" the priest asked.

"Why wouldn't it be?" her father responded. "Are you saying she's in league with demons? At fifteen?"

"Many a child has been tempted to darkness due to their ignorance. A benevolent presence might soon turn out to have a dark origin."

Ashleigh realized she wasn't wanted in the conversation. If they were going to speculate on her connections to demons, they could do it where she couldn't hear them.

But what if she reached out to the darker forces in the world? If priests and angels couldn't heal Ellie, maybe demons could. They were already at least as powerful as angels, maybe more so since through all their efforts the angels couldn't manage to stamp them out entirely. But how did one go about summoning a demon? Were there rites, like in church? Or was it all just a little blood and some drawing on the ground to get one to appear? She needed to investigate.

000000

Weeks later, Eleanor's condition hadn't improved. Despite Ashleigh praying with her sister daily, no angel had come to visit. Priests were getting worried, some had even gone so far as to suggest putting Eleanor out of her misery. They didn't phrase it that way, of course. They said things like "It would be best to let her fall into Blessed Sleep." It seemed their parents were coming around.

"Ashleigh, what do you think would look best on your sister?" Their mother held up two dresses that Ashleigh hardly paid any attention to. She refused to entertain the idea that Ellie was going to die.

"I've selected a nice plot in the churchyard for her," their father said in passing. "Under that tree you two used to climb."

"Dammit, Ellie," Ashleigh said to her sister, "they're treating you like you're already dead."

"As long as you don't lose faith, Ash, I'll be fine." Eleanor gave a weak smile, and winced in pain.

"Does it hurt?" Ashleigh asked.

"It's less of a loud rumble and more of a dull roar now," Ellie sighed.

Ashleigh looked down at the haggard form of her sister. Ellie's skin clung to her bones. She'd hardly been able to eat for weeks, only able to keep down broth and some bread. Every morning Ashleigh brushed and braided her sister's thin hair and helped her walk around the room for exercise. It lifted Ellie's spirits, but little else.

"I've got to get you out of here," Ashleigh said. "They're giving up on you, Ellie. I can't let them. We'll find someone who can fix you. I'll do whatever it takes."

That night she woke Ellie from her sleep and helped her older sister get dressed. They set out into the Hunter's Moon night at a slow pace. Eleanor's feet dragged, her boots catching on everything in their path. Their breath sent white plumes into the air and shivers wracked their slight frames.

"Ash, it's too cold. We should go home," Eleanor whispered.

"Not a chance," Ashleigh said. "I'll do whatever it takes, Ellie."

"You'll get yourself killed," Eleanor said, leaning heavily on her sister. "I'm too weak to wield my sword. If a werewolf jumps out at us…"

"An angel will come and save us," Ashleigh snapped.

"They don't just come because we tell them to," Eleanor said.

"They will this time," Ashleigh replied. "You don't stand a chance if they don't."

Avacyn, Ashleigh thought, if you're listening, I need you to come and save my sister.

Something dark flitted over the moon. An angelic silhouette hung in the air for a moment, obscuring the heron, before diving towards them. An angel wearing the garb of Flight Goldnight, the red and white accented with burnished gold armor, landed before the sisters.

"You should not be travelling this late," the angel said. Ashleigh was instinctively afraid.

"Please, we need Avacyn to help us. Can you find her?" Ashleigh said. "My sister is ill and we've been praying for weeks, but she hasn't answered." Her voice began growing louder. "Is she not worth Avacyn's time? Are any of us not worth your time? Are we too far beneath you, or is it because you can't do anything? Because you're not actually as strong as the church says you are?"

"Ash," Ellie cautioned, her voice barely audible.

"No, Ellie, she's going to hear this, because they deserve to be criticized. They aren't gods. Avacyn isn't even a god if she doesn't bother responding to our prayers."

"You lack faith," the angel said. "And your poor faith has let a demon into your sister, to feed off of her."

"Well excuse me for having a healthy dose of skepticism," Ashleigh said, taking the angel's observation as an insult. "Excuse me for looking on while my sister drives herself into the ground for the church when none of her prayers have ever been answered."

"Ash, please," Eleanor said, putting all her strength into making her voice heard. "Don't take out your anger on this angel. I've had the same doubts you have, and this is what it's cost me. I'm prepared to pay the price. If that bars me from the Blessed Sleep, then so be it."

"Ellie, that's a load of crap and you know it," Ashleigh said. "I'll do whatever it takes for my sister to be well again, angel."

"Whatever it takes?" the angel asked, arching an eyebrow. "You would take on her burden?"

"If I had to," Ashleigh said.

"Ash, no," Ellie cried, trying with all her might to shake her little sister. When did Ash become so strong, she wondered, or when did I become so weak?

"Only with the right trigger," the angel mused, speaking to nobody in particular. "I accept the terms. Do you?"

Ashleigh held out a hand. "Shake on it?"

As the angel's hand closed around hers, it morphed into a claw. The angelic wings warped into batlike extremities, and the face became a grisly visage with oily black skin like a toad's. A demon held Ashleigh in its clutches while she struggled to support her sister's weight.

"You'll never be able to join the Runechanters now, girl," the demon growled.

"Never really wanted to," Ashleigh said. "I'll do whatever it takes for my sister."

The demon disappeared. Before Ashleigh's eyes, Ellie regained her strength. She stood upright, hurriedly backing away from her sister.

"Ashleigh," Eleanor said, "do you realize what you've done?"

"Only saved your life is what," Ashleigh said.

Eleanor drew her sword, pointing it at her sister's chest. "You made a pact with that… that thing."

"Ellie, what's wrong?" Ashleigh took a step towards her sister, but Eleanor took a step back. "I saved you."

"At what cost, Ashleigh? Your future? Your soul? Our parents?"

"Why can't you just be happy that I saved you from mom and dad killing you and being done with it all?" Ashleigh threw her hands into the air. "Ellie, I did it because I love you. What can I do to make you see that? I'll do whatever it takes to-"

"There's that again," Ellie cried. "Whatever it takes. Those are the words demons love. And now you've done whatever it takes. What's it going to take, huh? Will it be worth it in the end? No, Ash, don't back away from me. Just hold still. I'm going to return the favor. I'll save you from whatever bargain you just made. No, stand still. You're not standing still. Come back here. Don't run away from me!"

In her fervor, Ellie tripped over a root. Ashleigh kept running, unable to look back and see the crazed light in her sister's eyes. Ellie had transformed into something completely different. Why had she done that? Ashleigh made a huge sacrifice for her, but all Eleanor could think about was the demon.

They were all afraid of demons because they were powerful, more powerful than the angels. If Ashleigh wanted to achieve anything, she had to ally herself with the force that could actually effect change. This was probably a wise first step.

Let the angels plead and threaten. The demons would stand their ground.