#(ps it ends up being something like the truckstop hooker Legendary photoshoot Chris did)

[usuallydeepcoffee]

I always read your tags because I know they often have lil jokes and stuff and it makes me feel like an initiated but sometimes you say batcrazy stuff that makes me run to your inbox like a flaming crocodile is chasing me - Steve with an OnlyFans??? I mean yeah I bet if HE got an OnlyFans he could pay the bill with it, his nudes must be legendary, but like W H A T

ahwjdshjasjjd well let me put out the flaming crocodile with my THIRST (that doesn’t even make sense, but ssh)

hrfjdkejrf I mean, realistically speaking, I don’t see in-canon Steve going for the whole nude photoshoot route to raise money for himself. 

But if it’s for charity? To raise awareness for something? I mean, he’s not one to back down from a challenge, is he? 

Or maybe they’re doing a press conference and they’ve moved onto the sillier questions, when a journalist asks Natasha if she’d be willing to do open an OnlyFans or like, do a sexy calendar for charity. 

Steve then clenches his jaw and tries, he tries not to say anything or verbally tear that sleazy journalist a new one, so instead he acts like the answer was directed at him and says “Oh, absolutely. Get me a good photographer and we can start shooting tomorrow”. Bruce has a coughing fit. T0ny who was rocking on his chair falls on his ass. Sam pretends to drop his pen and disappears behind the table. The whole PR team probably books a 2hr massage session.

So then #SteveRogersOnlyFans starts trending, as you do, and well, he’s certainly not backing down now.

**SHIPPY BONUS**: Maybe Steve finds out he’s not that comfortable with a bunch of strangers touching him, taking pictures of him when he’s naked, oogling him. So he turns to the people he trusts the most. Who? Sam and Nat of course.