#(promise ring with my partner - ace ring - mood ring my partner and i got together)

[good-beansdraws]

Finally finished my Milgram-characters-in-my-outfits thing :D Yuno's probably the only one who would actually wear the outfit I gave them, but that's the fun part! Bonus lazy Shidou in my fave shirt of all time, plus technically the cow is headless because my dryer ruined it...

[astralastrid]

USUK/UKUS survey by @americapersonified

Tagged by @hariible so here we go!

In what decade did they officially become involved?

¯\_(ツ)_/¯.

The fics have ruined me. So I'd probably say during or after WWII. Plus that's when the "Special Relationship" was coined.

Who tops? (USUK or UKUS?)

*Looks at the UKUS server I made* idk you tell me

Honestly though Arthur probably has more relationship experience, so he's more confident and willing to take the lead. Alfred is actually secretly shy and modest about this stuff! (I mean, I do think we Americans are more conservative and modest when it comes to romance?) Plus like, Alfred finally feels like he can trust someone and let them take care of him, that he's loved when the whole world mocks him... Whoops got a little angsty there

Was either of them a virgin before their first hookup?

It's time for me to unveil my demi!America headcanon that's just me projecting aw yeah

Alfred is. He actually thought he was ace before he met Arthur because he was never interested in that kind of stuff, preferring to cuddle instead. But once he met Arthur he trusted that he'd take care of him and stuff and wanted to try it.

If not, to whom did each lose his virginity?

Alfred to Arthur.

Arthur to? Idk Francis probably? I do see FrUk as like, a past thing. Along with SpUk and PortEng. So one of them probably.

(Read more bc LONG post)

Are they more patient with each other in private, or do they bicker/tease each other all the time?

Haha projection time 2.0

Bro, like, a good relationship should have teasing anyway (unless your partner isn't ok with it!) so definitely. But Alfred actually gets self-conscious about the things that Arthur teases him about so he has to stop and tell him how much he loves him and stuff. But in general they're more patient because they've come to understand each other and love the other's quirks.

Will they ever get married?

Yeah but after a while. Alfred wants to do it right away but Arthur rejects him, saying that the don't need rings to prove that they love each other. He promises he will eventually. I like to think after gay marriage legalized in the States they celebrated by getting married.

If so, where will the wedding be held? (Add other details if you wish.)

Hopeless romantic Ame time!

Can you have more than one ceremony? No? Oh well. Summer wedding in America, Fall Wedding in England. I don't know much about wedding planning but I read a headcanon that was like "their vows were so beautiful it made everyone cry" and I support that. Both of them cry during the other's too. Lots of tears shed on both sides during everything. Lots of white and silver and gold because yeah. None of this stupid "one of them wears a dress" business. Like, it's ok for a relationship to be masc/masc and fem/fem like don't heteronormalize it. So two tuxes. Probably no "walking down the aisle?" Maybe they both come in from the sides idk. A cheer when they kiss. "Can't Help Falling in Love" by Elvis is their first dance. Arthur probably sings "I Wanna Hold Your Hand" after their first dance. Wedding cupcakes is galaxy brain so wedding cupcakes. Multiple flavors.

At whose house do they most often stay together?

Alfred's. It's larger anyway.

Do they refer to each other by their nation names or human names?

Human names. Nation only for business.

What pet names do they have for each other?

Arthur: Love, (The most common one) Darling, Dearest, Dear, Poppet (2nd most common) Alfie (extremely rare, or when drunk. Alfred adores when he calls him this though.)

Alfred: Babe, Baby, Artie, Art, Honey, Sweetie, Sweetiepie, Sweetheart, Sweetcheeks.

Who drives?

Both, Alfred loves to drive! But Arthur gets nervous because Alfred can drive like a New Yorker, (that is, aggressively, quickly, a bit dangerously, lots of honking from him and others) especially when he's in a rush or late, and god help everyone when he has road rage.

So Arthur judges the mood and insits if he knows Alfred is probably gonna drive like that.

Is Alfred good at making Arthur’s tea?

Dude of course. It's never quite perfect of course, but you don't date someone for decades without learning how to make their lifeline. In this vein Arthur also knows how to make Alfred's coffee. (And since this isn't a question, Alfred likes it blacker than black in the mornings, and all sugared and creamered up after work and in the evenings.)

It’s universally accepted that Arthur sucks at cooking. Does Alfred enjoy cooking? Is he good at it? Or does he usually stick to McDonald’s and fast food?

Ok yeah but I headcanon Arthur can bake, like really well. Ok yeah I know about his scones but maybe he's just bad at making those specifically.

Alfred loves to cook. He loves to grill even more. But he likes to experiment and try new stuff and he's damn good at it (because cooking is just another science!) So his meals are like comfort food. Almost restaurant quality. Boy could be a chef. But he also loves his fast food and instants. (Kraft's Mac and Cheese is so good.) And yeah he loves Mickey D's but have y'all ever been to like, Noodles and Company or Sonic? Like, there are some GOOD fast food joints and I'm sure he loves them all. Arthur probably doesn't like burger joints but does like places like Panera.

Do they shower together? (Often; not specifically for sex.)

Sometimes? Idk man it's hard as shit to wash your back so yeah? Also the tenderness of giving your lover a bath? I'm🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺

Who smells better? (In your opinion.)

¯\_(ツ)_/¯

People just smell like, people, and to the other they each smell like home.

How vocal are they in bed?

Alfred’s so LOUD lmao. But Arthur loves it. If he was more of a memelord he'd record and make a remix of his sounds.

Who has the more active libido?

Definitely Arthur.

Is spending time together easy, or are they forced apart for long periods at a time?

¯\_(ツ)_/¯ I don't know how politics work? Do important government officials have to be there in person for meetings?

Let's have two senarios here:

Let's say they do, and they have to be apart for periods of time. Both the boys have separation anxiety and HATE being apart, so there's always the fear and the paronia and concern when they are apart, and they have almost daily video chats. It's really hard on both of them. They text and call often too. They miss the other dearly. When they reunite they kiss and cuddle like they need it to survive. They're much more affectionate with each other and spend every moment they can together to "recharge" before the "hyper-affectioness" goes down. Leaving is super difficult. Lots of tears and hugs, promises to be back asap, longful stares and apologies. Cursing their job and such. Desire to quit or face the consequences and just stay. (Which is completely blocked by the other.)

Let's say somehow they work something out and they can spend long amounts of time together with minimal travel. Sometimes they get into fights or just get on each other's nerves or just need some alone time. Alfred will go run or excercise while Arthur goes to a café until they're ready to make up/miss and want to see the other. Business trips help keep tensions low, but they're still painful.

Are they wealthy? Or do they live modestly?

I’d say like average people. Arthur probably likes it a bit more tasteful and stylish though, so little hints of wealth. Also, Arthur basically has a library for his book collection that acts as his study and Alfred has his own study and a gaming room. They have the prettiest garden you ever did see though. And a really nice patio. With a nice backyard and grill.

For Alfred specifically: Glasses on or glasses off?

On! Except in the bedroom.

How often do they break up?

Rarely if at all. They probably did once and missed the other so badly that they promised never to do it again, and always talk it out. Sure they get into fights and one of them will storm off, but they both understand that that usually means the other needs to cool down before they can talk.

Open relationship?

No.

Did Arthur actually care for Alfred before the American Revolution?

I really want to say yes, because of how it was portrayed, but honestly? I don't think the U.S. was any different from England's other colonies. He'd occasionally check up on all of them, but he was super surprised at how fast America grew.

Of course once the war happens he's riddled with regret. Maybe if he treated him better this wouldn't have happened. War with a colony for their independence is ugly anyway. Even after the war, I don't think England was as heartbroken as it was portrayed. I think he was depressed about it for a while, but eventually got over it. It still took him, like any colonizer, a while to see him as an equal though, which infuriated America. However they are both completely over it and don't talk much about it anymore. It's all in the past for them.

@milopottz (I know we don't interact but 👀)

Tag people if you want, so

Also @alifeasvivid and @anyone who wants to

[animalssecrets]

10 Secrets To Keeping The Love Strong And Your Relationship From Going Under

10 Secrets To Keeping The Love Strong And Your Relationship From Going Under

I thought I had it all figured out. I created my future in an imaginary crystal ball, and I was ready to ride off into the sunset into all my happily-ever-after, fairytale bliss.

The only problem with all of this is that I typically shared my unsolicited advice while single, avoiding love like the plague, or in a terribly toxic relationship.

I created unrealistic expectations in my mind that only set me up for one failed relationship after another, which I immediately justified as “one door closing so another could open” or promising my heart that “there are far greater things ahead than any we leave behind.”

As I’ve continued to grow and develop as a woman, a writer and a lover, I have learned a few things about true love and how skewed my perception of what it meant used to be.

I am fortune enough to be surrounded by so many amazing (absolutely imperfect) relationships that have allowed me to piece together a few secrets that no one (especially the self-righteous, naïve, advice-soliciting blogger I used to be) would dare tell you.

1. Love is not a feeling; it is a choice

I used to believe that when I found my perfect love, it would suddenly make everything else in my life perfect as well. I believed that love conquered all, and that one day I would meet someone who would change everything I felt, saw and believed.

This is simply not the way that it works. Being in love does not mean you won’t have days when you feel as though the world is ending and your life is over. Being in love does not mean you won’t be moody, grouchy, analytical of every detail and even question aspects of your relationship that self-affirming blogger girl would tell you marks a giant red flag.

Choosing to love someone in spite of these fleeting feelings is a constant, conscious, daily decision.

2. Lust fades, love stays

Butterflies, magic, stardust and rainbows are all great, but they all go away. Lust is present in the beginning of nearly all relationships, as it is what attracts you to someone in the first place.

Before you know it, butterflies in your stomach become taking care of him after one too many shots of whiskey, and getting dolled up for a dinner date becomes good morning kisses while sipping coffee on the patio with no makeup on. We are conditioned to believe that the former is better than the latter, but I believe the opposite.

Lust, chemistry and primal attraction are wonderful feelings, but they are just that: feelings. Love remains long after the clock strikes midnight and the magic fades away. Love is the ability to see beyond the shell in which someone is contained, and love them for the qualities they possess that would still be present if the whole world were blind.

3. Just because you don’t like someone doesn’t mean you don’t love them

There are going to be times where you don’t really like your partner very much, but you still love him or her. In fact, love gives us the ability to see past all of the many annoying things that someone does on a daily basis.

Want to know the best part? This also means that someone loves you enough to put up with you even when they don’t like you at the moment.

No one is perfect; we all have our moods and our pet peeves and the things that make us unique. There will be times when you will look at your partner and think, “Why in the world do I love this person so dang much?”

When this question presents itself, stop and think about your life without him or her, and you will inevitably discover the answer.

4. Letting go of unrealistic expectations is the healthiest thing you can do for love

This is a really big one for me. I still struggle sometimes with wanting a storybook romance that makes all of the fairytales jealous. I set love on such a pedestal that I don’t think anyone stood a chance measuring up.

I still believe in love with all of my heart, but I am learning to accept the fact that I don’t get to determine the parameters for which love comes into my life.

It isn’t “settling” to accept the fact that true love takes work every single day, requires sacrifice and effort and does not involve finding someone who can read your mind and make every single one of your wishes come true.

Letting go of unrealistic expectations I had created for love allowed me to open my heart up to imperfect, jagged, pieces of love that filled spaces I didn’t even know were missing.

5. You are not your friend’s (or your sister’s/mom’s/neighbor’s) relationship

It is human nature to seek advice and consolation from loved ones when facing both highs and lows, but it’s imperative to remember that your relationship is not the same as any of the relationships around you.

I adopted trust issues after my best friend was cheated on, became a phone snooper when a girlfriend snooped and found exactly what she was looking for and I’ve convinced myself on a coffee date that all men must be the same.

Relationships have enough problems, struggles and limitations independently; don’t borrow problems from those around you. Along the same lines, everyone around you will always have the answer/advice/solution no matter what kind of situation your current relationship is facing.

Take these words of wisdom with a grain of salt. Follow your heart, but take your head with you, too. You are not him or her; he or she is not you and nobody really understands all of the intricate details of a relationship from the outside.

6. Love needs to be watered in order to grow

Just as much as loving someone is a choice, relationships must be watered and nurtured in order to grow into their purest, fullest, happiest form. Relationships, like anything else worth having in life, take work. This does not mean that you should be bending over backward and causing riffs in all other aspects of your life in order to make a relationship work.

Working on a relationship and making a relationship work are two completely different concepts. Life is way too short to spend it with someone you are simply “making it work” with. At the same time, it’s imperative to remember that you must protect and nurture your relationship if you want it to thrive.

Take time to reconnect, show appreciation and grow together. All too often I see people living parallel lives; merely coexisting with their significant other.

While it’s important to continue to grow and develop individually, it is just as important to grow together and strengthen the bonds that brought you together in the first place. The grass is greener where you water it, and love grows fullest when watered on a daily basis.

7. Dirty laundry does not belong anywhere other than a laundry basket

Social media makes this concept very difficult, as many people are conditioned to turn directly to a tweet, status or hashtag to declare their feelings and emotions at any given moment.

I had a wonderful conversation with an older couple in which the woman told me that she had a conversation with her daughter when she was having marriage issues. “I just don’t get it; you and dad have never been in a fight in your 40 years of marriage, yet we seem to fight all the time. What’s your secret?”

The woman replied, “Honey, dad and I fight when he leaves the milk lid unscrewed, swears in front of the grandkids and forgets to turn the AC off before leaving the house. We’ve spent the past 40 years fighting. The secret to our marriage is the fact that the fight starts and ends exactly where it belongs: between us.”

I love this concept. Life is not always going to be rainbows and butterflies, and relationships will inevitably face rough waters and bumpy roads. A disagreement between two people is much easier resolved than a disagreement that involves social media and screen shots of conversations.

It’s easy to want to declare your emotions and anger to the world when you are feeling hurt or vulnerable, but learning to turn to one another and to work on discovering the root of the problem will lead to a much more healthy resolve. Plus, it’s no fun having to defend a mended relationship that you just got done slandering via social media.

Keep your dirty laundry in your laundry basket and learn how to sift through it together.

8. Sometimes you don’t “just know” and that’s okay

This is another concept I continue to struggle with. I always believed that I would meet someone and instantly know he was my soul mate. I have heard people say, “when you are with the right person, you will know,”more times than I can even count, and I spent a lot of time letting people pass me by because I would meet them without having an instant connection.

I know that part of my heart will always be a hopeless romantic, and I am okay with that, but I am also learning that sometimes falling in love isn’t fireworks and ringing bells and jumping from airplanes without looking below.

Sometimes love is a quiet wave, slowly kissing the shore and sneaking back into the vast blue ocean. Sometimes love is friendship caught fire, a well-deserved second chance and a resting place for your heart when you find yourself caught in a storm. Sometimes love has been right under your nose all along.

I still believe that when I find my perfect love, I will “know” in a sense, but I am learning that for everything I know, there’s a parallel that I don’t know and that’s okay. Sometimes love isn’t having everything figured out, but, rather, finding peace in knowing that you have someone by your side that you enjoy discovering the answers with.

9. Your life is not a movie

There are two outcomes in life: the way we think it should go and the way it actually ends up going. Movies, social media, online articles and Hollywood dramas set a precedence that does not align with reality in any sense.

When we encounter struggles or hardships, it’s almost human nature to think of the ultra-romantic way our significant other SHOULD handle it. Don’t let your relationship “should all over itself. Your relationship may not make a very good screenplay, but life has enough ups and downs and sometimes a relationship is best when served on solid ground.

Allow your relationship to grow and develop without expectations set by others. Keep in mind that even the most romantic and sexy movies end (usually in 90 minutes or less). Your relationship has the potential to be a lifetime of sweet moments dipped in a heavy dose of reality. Treating your relationship with movie-worthy expectations with inevitably result in a not-so-happy-ending while the credits roll.

10. Love takes time

Last, but certainly not least, please remember this: love takes time. We live in a world where we want something, and we want it now. I’ve learned that the faster something catches fire, the faster it is likely to burn out.

Be patient with your heart. Be patient with the hearts around you. If you see potential in someone, allow it to transpire naturally, without forcing expectations and timestamps all over it.

Men often take longer than women to open up, and it can be frustrating to feel like you are progressing much quicker than your partner. Please remember that just because someone doesn’t love the SAME way you do, it doesn’t mean they don’t love with all that they have.

Patience is a characteristic that I feel many of us neglect in so many aspects of our lives. It’s important to not only be patient with our loved ones’ hearts, but patient with the heart beating within our own chest.

We have all loved and lost, been hurt and scared, and we are all choosing to put one foot in front of the other in an attempt to love again. Be patient with your feelings, be patient with your emotions and be patient when giving your love.

Let yourself give love. Let yourself be loved

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