#(okay i make jokes about how he’s like ‘soon as she unblocks me the wedding is back on’)

[malkaleh]

The thing is, the horrible thing is about abusers is that you can feel and know something is off but they’ll make you think it’s you and then people will blame you for not leaving/not seeing the signs/being taken in at and anyway that is what is happening to Celebrimbor right now and it is Awful :/.

[dxlansdarling]

not that easily | e.d

Summary: after a night stand in the middle of a break, things aren’t going as you have wanted. Remembering your words, with Grayson on your side; you will do the right thing.

Warnings: a little angst, but fluff. Some FRIENDS reference and spoiler?

Word count: 2932

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“I don’t want to be without you” he said “Not now, nor never”

You looked at the picture in your hands, and with a long sigh, you closed your eyes. Sitting on the steps of the house’s gallery, you regretted leaving your coat inside your house. November nights started to get colder and colder, and being outside at 3am, freezing to dead and a tear-stained face; you were going to get sick. But you couldn’t care less, not when your heart beat slowly and painfully against your chest.

“You think you would get rid of me that easily?”

It’s been months since the last time you saw him; two months if you wanted to be precisely. And still, you couldn’t forget that day. Both of you sitting on his bed, a bad luck on his shoulders and someone carrying a one-night-stand on her belly. No, he said he didn’t cheat on you. No, he wouldn’t do that to you.  But it felt like he did; the pregnancy test on his hands was enough to feel the heartbreak. She was four-months pregnant.

“And you think I would let you go that easily?” I mumbled, his lips caressing mine.

The both of you dated for long three years, and after a few stupid fights; you were on a break four months before that night. Yes, you felt like Rachel on Friends as he tried to explain he was drunk and didn’t know what he was doing. You knew about what happened as soon as that break ended, you knew about the one night stand, but you never thought it would end on a fucking baby. So, not only you were heartbroken at first; you had to do the right thing and leave.

She was from a really religious family that, as soon as they learned about what happened; the engagement came two weeks after you left. You could have stayed and fight for him? Yes, but you couldn’t do that to him, nor the baby. The little human needed a family, and if he fucked up, he needed to make up and do the right thing. You told yourself every night after leaving his house.

Trying to warm up you hugged yourself, shivers down your spine, and your eyes travelling to the magazine on your lap; you couldn’t help but bit the inside of your cheek on anger. Or jealously. Or regret. You didn’t know what you were feeling anymore, but it wasn’t the only thing you didn’t understand.

How funny it was when, out of nowhere, this girl appeared on his Instagram and all of his social media. Not only she was showing her growing belly -which was super small for someone who was six months pregnant- but she was also promoting their wedding. In less than forty-eight hours, she was going to be Mrs.Dolan. You didn’t want to think the worst, but something wasn’t right; and you weren’t the only one who thought that.

Grayson never lost contact with you. Even after weeks, he would still pick you up from your parent’s house and would go to an ice cream parlor to cheer you up. And mostly, on updating you on how things where and how he hated this new girl his brother had to date. Even if you agreed on everything he said, you still kept quiet and thought that you were doing the right thing. But, where you?

Speaking of him, you couldn’t help but smile down at your phone when it rang and a message appeared on your screen.

               Gray-Gray: plz tell me you’re awake.

 Your hands felt frozen as you typed back.

                 You: unluckily, yes.

                 Gray-Gray: we need to talk.

               Gray-Gray: like asap.

 Confused, and a little worried, you read his texts again. Was he on trouble?

                 You: r u okay?

               Gray-Gray: ill pick u up tomorrow afternoon.

               Gray-Gray: believe me, ill be okay as soon as we meet.

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You rubbed your eyes as you stood outside of your house, this time smart enough to grab a big sweatshirt that belonged to him. It was the only thing that you wanted to keep from him and keep on using it. It didn’t help you look any better, if you were honest. You couldn’t sleep at all the night before, not only because the wedding date was coming closer and your heart was crashing a little bit more every minute; but because Grayson didn’t say anything more after those texts asking you to meet him. So you stayed up, with pain and curiosity.

When his car parked in front of you, as soon as you jumped in, you smacked the back of his head.

“Hey!” he groaned, fixing the beanie he had over his hair, “What was that for?”

“For worrying me and keeping me up confused” you replied, putting on the seatbelt when he sped up again, “So, what’s up?”

“It’s not Ethan’s child.”

You choked on your own saliva, feeling how your heart stopped the moment he spoke.

“What?” you blurted out, “What do you mean it’s not Ethan’s child? Of course it is!”

“It’s not, Y/N, listen,” he grabbed a few papers that were on the back seats and handed them to you, “I had my suspicious the moment everything happened, but couldn’t talk about it because it was all a disaster at the moment. No one needed me making more drama. Or asking for a few tests.”

“You didn´t’-” you started, but Grayson shrugged.

“I may have tricked her into going to a doctor –who’s a family’s friend- that convinced her to make a few tests to see if the baby was healthy,” he said, “She’s not six months pregnant; she’s three.”

Looking at the papers in your hand, you read the medical form and almost stopped breathing when you recognized what you had in your hands. Part of you felt relief, there was a little bit of hope, but the other part of you that still needed to do the right thing came up again. You looked over at Grayson again, the papers in your hands being not enough.

“Grayson, this is- it is not enough” you said, “this could be fake, anyone can write informs these days. What makes you believe that they would trust a piece of paper?”

Grayson laughed bitterly, and turning the car into a parking lot, he grabbed something from his jeans and you raised your eyebrows at the floral phone case.

“New case?” you joked.

“Not my phone,” He shot back and winked.

Your mouth opened widely.

“Are you fucking crazy, Grayson?! It’s her phone! It’s her privacy!” you almost yelled, “She will be looking for it, smart ass, and if she has the find my phone app-”

“Y/N, I swear to God, I will slap you if you try and take her side on this one” he spoke up, turning on his seat and looking at you, “I’m sure this bitc-woman is trying to get my brother into a marriage that it’s not fair and that he doesn’t want. Yes, you’re right, the papers aren’t enough, but this phone has the information we need to end this shit.”

“What are you talking about?”

“I saw her texting someone the other day, and not only I know her passcode after seeing her type it so many times,” he laughed, typing the passcode and unlocking the phone, “but I also learned that she has a contact blocked, and by the looks of it, it’s someone she wants to hide.”

He pressed on the blocked number, unblocking it, and when their conversation opened; you took the phone from Grayson’s hand and started reading the last discussion they had. It was the supposed baby daddy, and you felt like you could breathe again. You felt your heart bursting with hope, and as you looked at Grayson, you smiled.

“Does this mean-?” you stuttered. He nodded, a small smile on his cheeks.

“We can end this bullshit,” he confirmed, hands still on the wheel, “Also, this doctor that ran the tests, has done a paternal test. I knew my brother wasn’t stupid enough to not wrap it before he taps it.”

You blushed, “Well…”

“Spare me the fucking details!”

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 You sat on your room that night too, but it was different from the other nights. That night, you had hope. A lot of it. The part of you that wanted to do the right thing went flying out the window the moment you read the conversation this girl, Lola, had with her true baby daddy, Stephen. You had sent the conversation to your mail, not only via screen-shots, but the written one too. You wanted to have all the proofs you needed to get your man out of there.

You were short of time, the wedding being the next day and what stopped you from running into the twins’ house was that you needed one more proof. The test that Grayson talked about in the car wasn’t ready yet, and after he asked; everything got more complicated when the doctor answered that it was going to be ready the next morning. The same morning that bitch was going to say ‘I do’ to Ethan.

Thinking about him, you were sure that night was his bachelor party. Grayson told you after he left you on your house again, and for a few seconds, the pain came back. You never spoke nor asked about Ethan when you were with Grayson, the idea of him marrying someone else that wasn’t you made your stomach turn and almost throw up. You couldn’t bare that image.

After a nice dinner with your parents, you went to your bathroom so you could take a quick shower before going to bed. But as you were grabbing your clothes, your phone started ringing. Thinking it could be Grayson, you furrowed your eyebrows as you read the unknown number on the screen. You quickly put it on your ear as soon as you answered.

“Hello?”

“Y/N…”

You fell back on your bed, your knees wobbling and heart beating so fast you had to put a hand over it. Even after months without talking, you remembered perfectly his voice.

“Ethan…” you mumbled, more to yourself as you couldn’t still believe it.

“Oh baby, how I’ve missed your voice,” he slurred and you couldn’t help the feeling that bubbled on your chest. You missed his voice too, “and all of you. I miss you so much, do you miss me too?”

Like you have no idea, you thought.

“Where are you calling me from?” you wanted to know, “I never deleted your number.”

“I may or may not have stolen a phone from someone”, he mumbled, sounding like a child. “Lola blocked your number, and if she knew how many beers I’ve drank tonight, she would kill me. She’s crazy…”

You really don’t know how much.

“Drunk again, Dolan? Let me remind you what happened last time” you blurted bitterly, even though you were smiling a little bit. You couldn’t tell if you were still mad at him for sleeping with Lola, after all you were on a break, but Rachel didn’t forgive Ross for a couple of episodes. Would that count as months or weeks?

He groaned on the microphone, “I’m sorry, so sorry. I-I- hate myself for that,” he said, “I regret it so much. I don’t want to marry this bitc-” he hiccupped and laughed, “shit, sorry, I shouldn’t be talking that way about my future wife, huh?”

The sarcasm made you laugh a little, and pressing the phone tightly against your ear, you looked at the papers that were on your bedside table. Every word he said pushed you into getting him back.

“You will be happy, Ethan” you said, “You will see.”

“Not without you” he slurred once again, making your heart skip once more. You could hear the music that was blasting on his bachelor party but he was talking louder than the music. He kept silent for a few seconds before talking again, “I can’t believe I let you go that easily.”

You wanted to say something back, but before you could open your mouth, he hang up. On purpose or not; he said the right thing to convince you completely. You were getting Ethan Dolan back on your side.

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 “So, have you ever imagined yourself walking down the aisle?” Ethan asked, his head on your lap and your hands playing with his locks, “I mean, do you want to get married?”

“Yes, I want to, and yes, I have pictured myself walking down the aisle” you laughed. His eyes landed on you, a sweet smile on his cheeks and blushing a little bit.

“And who is waiting for you at the end?”

You caressed his cheeks.

“The only man I have pictured being married to.”

 Standing outside the church, with papers in hand, you knew that you were going to be on the cover of every magazine on the country. Man, privacy wasn’t going to be a thing for months. But you didn’t care about that when Grayson emailed you the test results, the last proof needed, and you printed it before leaving your house. You were late, and you make sure you were; you wanted to end this as Lola had wanted it. On every social media.

With only some old jeans on and Ethan’s sweatshirt, you ran over the church’s steps. A lot of photographers were waiting outside, and as they didn’t recognize you because you were wearing the hood over your head, it wasn’t hard to get into the church. Cameron was waiting for you on the entrance, Grayson had already told her our plan, and she smiled at you when she pulled the hood down.

“Go and get the love of your life back, girl” she said. You smiled at her, and as the both of you walked into the aisle, everything seemed to stop.

He was standing next to Lola wearing a dark suit, and as you stared at him, the bags under his eyes broke your heart. Grayson was by his side, obviously being his best man. It wasn’t until you were two steps into the aisle that gasps were heard, a lot of the guests recognizing you and making everyone turn their heads to look at you. And when his hazel eyes fell on you, opened with surprise and happiness, you couldn’t move your eyes from him.

“Cam, would you do me a favor and read this out loud?” you smashed the papers against her chest and started walking his way, down the aisle. You could hear Cameron reading the test’s result out loud, and how everyone started gasping and whispering. But your attention was in the man that kept on looking at you even when the woman beside him started to scream at him.

“Ethan! It’s not true!” she had said, grabbing his hands but he would pulled them back, not even giving her a quick glance, “Look at me!”

He didn’t. You kept a serious face, mostly when Lola took a few steps in your way and wanted to stop you, but you dodged her hand and as soon as you were only feet away from Ethan, you grabbed the back of his head in your hands and pulled him into you, kissing him in his own wedding, in front of his guests, and don’t giving a damn fuck about it. He was your man, and it was clear when he hugged your waist and pushed you into him, deepening the kiss.

You heard Lola crying and shouting, the photographers inside the church not wasting any minute to take their pictures. Grayson hollered and laughed behind his brother, happy that his twin got his girl back and that Lola wasn’t going to ruin his happiness. Everyone was shocked, disappointed, except for Ethan’s family. They all knew who was the one that could make him so happy, and it was only you.

You pulled away from his lips, a smug smile on your cheeks, and raised one of his eyebrows.

“Did you really think you would get rid of me that easily?” you joked, “or that I could let you go that easily? To marry someone else?”

Ethan smiled, pulling you against him once again and lifting you off from the floor. Your arms hugged his neck instantly, and as he made his way out of the church, all eyes on you, he kept on kissing you.

“You have no idea how much I fucking love you, Y/N” he mumbled against your skin, the claps of his family echoing and making the both of you laugh, “You’re the only one that I want to marry someday.”

You smirked.

“I told you I would walk down the aisle to the only man I pictured being married to,” you helped him open the church door, still in his arms, “Not being the same scenario, but the same man at the end of it.”

The photographers that were outside were on you instantly, the questions almost unrecognizable as everyone spoke at the same time. Ethan pulled you into his side, almost running into the car that was rented for the wedding day, and you couldn’t help but laugh as you jumped inside. He jumped inside too, throwing his suit jacket on the backseats and driving away from all the drama that was starting.

You would never let this man leave your life, and he would never let you leave his, not that easily. Not now, nor never.