#(not pinning blame on anyone but that Shouldn’t Be A Thing in any public community really)

[sysconversationalist]

I feel like we’re getting the syscourse community confused with the systems community & I don’t love that

[dynyamight]

I've seen a lot of people do it, so if you are up for it~ Ship your moots!

FINALLY. THE AWAITED LIST OF MOOTS IS COMPLETE. sorry this took forever anon!!

now, this is going to be long & i will try not to overexplain my ship pairings. did i take time to think about each paring? yes. but, will they be serious? no. they are dumb & silly.

let the crack pairings begin <3!!

@dekusneakers x BAKUGOU & TODOROKI now you would think? sneakers in a throuple? how come? mmm simple. i couldn’t choose one for her so she gets both. the more the merrier. besides, she deserves love from both sides, kisses on both cheeks. one begrudgingly smooch & one icy kith. as a deku kin, she’s completely satisfied. you’re welcome

@izusun x AIZAWA & ORCA similarly, i can’t have my bestie here with just ONE babe. so, i thought why don’t we get a fatherly figure & a dad bod to give her all the love she needs. so yes, bestie, you two deserves hugs at both sides of you. a twiggy one & a muscly one. the sun needs some shade, & that shade is these men.

@midnightpirates x SUKUNA he’s a mass murderer !! you can’t— oh, but i can. you see, yanna here hates mahito & guess who was the one to fuck up his shit. ah, that’s right, it was sukuna. two mahito an/tis sitting in a tree <3 it’s the perfect match made in hell.

@goth-himbo-dabi x DOCTOR WHO once again, people might wonder: why not dabi? my answer? it’s because my bby here finds the twiggy men attractive. i know, bummer. & you can’t get any twiggy-er than david tennant & matt smith. but which doctor? all of them.

@minisheku x KAMINARI i see you simp for his dunce face. & honestly, who wouldn’t?? also, i originally put sheepku,, but that’s ,, a bit weird. but, here’s the solution. you OWN a sheepku, with kaminari. ah yes, a modern day family unit. & he can entertain you, as well as be a source of electricity for your drawing tablet !! resources !!

@oyavaski x EN you said he was hot literally in your tags earlier in a reblog. so, i am simply gifting you water to quench your thirst. may you two meet in afo, & fall in love in the subconscious of deku’s mind. will deku feel awks? yeah. but like pfft, he’s so whipped for bkg, he’ll forget you two chilling in the corner of his thoughts.

@okworstie x GOJO & WATARI i never have to look up the gojo tag, like ever. because you’re always plastering his face all over my timeline. & yes, this is a good thing. but, the same applies to watari. i have never even seen bakudiez, or whatever it’s called, but apparently he’s aro, & there’s a moth man, & tape hits post limit thursday’s? yeah just keep both, mimi.

@rrandomtthings x AN/TI as one of fellow loyal, amazing bkdks, i think it’s only fitting that you find true love with a bkdk an/ti. create the banti we seek in our community. the enemies to lovers trope is in your blood, written in your deku genes. so, i dedicate the banti movement with this small offering of a ship. may you find diamonds on the minecraft server & build a diamond cabin.

@believeyourgalaxy x ITADORI you two are such cinnamon rolls !!!! super friendly. super kind. super relatable. & together, you guys can pin over megumi. maybe hopefully, sam can help itadori with his low iq brain to finally get together with megumi. because damn, sam can be like “this is my boyfriend, itadori. & this is itadori’s boyfriend, megumi.”

@wrensknight x SHIRAKUMO i didn’t even know it was oboro birthday, until you not only made a public post about to, but made art for him. cloud boy needs that partner to respect & cherish him entirely. & you just treat him so right?? draw him so good?? i hope you can go cloud watching & then later, ride the clouds with him. till death do you guys uh,, you know,,

@b1m0 x MIDORIYA you can't stand when he gets injured, let alone reckless & trying to save the world, when he should literally be saving his own ass. but, that just means you care about him DEEPLY. plus, you both are wholesome people. obviously two cinnamon rolls make a whole bakery !! & who doesn't want a bakery ?? i sure do! wehjw idk why i brought the point here, but just know you two make sense.

@mysterionrising x RENGOKU & VIGILANTE DEKU it’s that enemies to lovers trope once again !! for someone who wrote him off as annoying the first seconds she met him, kenny sure flipped over to the stan side. ever since then, i can only see kenny when i see rengoku. but, you know who else reminds me of kenny. vigilante deku. it’s super fruity that you have an entire bomb playlist for him. so keep him too !!

@kamishima x KIRISHIMA you are the biggest kiri simp i have ever met. you basically ship kiri with anyone who makes him happy. though, you do have a lot of ships, but with kiri it’s different. & so, i was thinking ‘mmm, if bug ships kiri with so many people?? shouldn’t she ship him with HERSELF?’ boom. suddenly both kiri & bug are happy, with a lovely home. my work here is done.

@ckatsudon x LAW LIET did i dig through your blog. why yes. & you know what i found? reblogs & tags dedicated to L. he’s best boy. he’s precious. he deserves a better end. an end with you. mmhmm !! because if we rewrote death note, where you were light, i think L & light could have been canon. & that also would make you happy. & the rest of the entire world

@drfox-kinnie x UNIKITTY i don’t even know the show, let alone who unikitty is exactly. but, you reblogged a banner, confirming your love for unikitty. & so, i am of course doing you a big favor !! she’s bubbly, friendly, & passionate just like you !! & bestie, while i may not know nothing about her, i know you love her. so, maybe you two platonically have a wonderful time, adventuring with the other wholesome characters !! also,, is she big enough to travel on? if so, look i got you a cat car!!

@midorree x MINACHAKO i ship you with another ship. why? because i can. besides, you are like my moot who is genuinely a head leader of the minachako ship on my timeline, & you have steadily been converting me?? but, i also noticed that mina AND uraraka have stolen your heart, & you have yet to fight them for it back. i hope you three can go into a brawl & see who can grab each other’s hands fastest.

@kiribakuxkacchakolover x HATSUME YOU HAVE IT AS YOUR TITLE HEADER. like you are literally having a billboard that calls mei your cutie patootie. &, you ask, & you shall receive. i hope you two can be the dorkiest nerds together, & ramble for eons & eons. i hope i’m invited to the transformer wedding you two will have <,3

@balaroo x MIRUKO like before, you too have your interest out in the open in your title header. but, you see, miruko is a total babe, with confidence & ego & with this stride that makes even the most alpha male quiver. you would be a total wife to miruko’s girlboss energy & that’s why this ship totally works.

@quix-mix x FREDDY FAZBEAR my precious lil young moot, i dug into your blog & noticed you enjoy the fnaf games. & mmm are you perhaps wanting to cuddle a certain demonic teddy bear? well, i approve. he'll fall in love, head over heels, with your art, he might not possess you right away !! might. but, listen, you always do enjoy the villains (; i gotchu !!

@lonely-rabbit x LANCE you said we’re moots & i agree, we are. however, i have noooo idea what even are your preferences. so, i went digging. & it’s such a coincidence that we bonded over our voltron trauma, & yet you still continue to simp over lance. &, like i don’t blame you !!! he’ll always be dumb baby & so all i ask is that you love him, for our sake. & sanity.

[keilemlucent]

lavender latte: viii

(M (for now!)

hawks | takami keigo x reader

ao3

chapter 1   ||   chapter 2  ||   chapter 3   ||  chapter 4   ||   chapter 5   ||  chapter 6   ||  chapter 7  ||  chapter 9  ||

masterlist

word count: ~4.7k

realities, huh. 

warnings: descriptions of blood and bodily injury, post-traumatic symptoms, panic/anxiety attacks 

----

oof. wow. here it is, part one of the BIG boy chapter. please mind the warnings on this one!! trauma and post-traumatic symptoms are a big theme in this chapter and the next. 

as an author, these have been some of the harder, more vulnerable chapters to create and i hope that the writing shows this  :’’’^) all that said, enjoy :’^) 

|||||||||||||||

Keigo was fucked up.

Or he had fucked up.

It was hard to tell the specifics of his predicament, considering how hard he’d hit his head.

 ‘Hawks’ was known for his speed, his skill, and his ability to finish fights off before they even had a chance to truly start. He prided himself on his prowess, the product of his own diligence and meticulous training. Normally, Keigo kept to these high standards without fail and with faltering. 

On the rare occasion he did get injured, it was usually simple scrapes or bruises.

Except, sometimes time, his shortcomings created much more than scratches. 

 His left arm was twisted the wrong way, wrenched from its socket. His skull ached, hair sticking to the back of his neck and cold.

Keigo blinked slowly, vision tilting and blurry against the asphalt he’d crashed onto. He’d sent his feathers to finish off what was left of the fight, knowing that he was, bodily, down for the count.

It hadn’t started as a large fight, notably. It shouldn’t have gotten so bad. The first alert he’d received just made it seem like petty burglary. Quickly after arriving on the scene, it escalated into an entire firefight spanning several blocks. 

He’d been one of the first heroes there, naturally. It wasn’t hard to disarm and pin most of the villains down, but quickly, things got out of hand. Figures forming from the afternoon’s shadows, quickly turning the simple de-escalation into an all-out brawl. 

Keigo pushed himself from the filthy ground, coughing up spittle and blood on the blacktop below. It wasn’t from an internal injury, he knew, just a bitten tongue and cheek that made the drippings of his mouth pink and cloudy. 

He sat up, forcing himself to his feet as more heroes arrived, finishing the job out of sheer numbers. Mentally, he cursed his mistakes and his stupor. The media circus and bureaucratic bullshit he was undoubtedly going to have to deal with made him audibly groan. Keigo could handle pain without question, but his least favorite parts of his job were the nuts and bolts of it all.

 Maybe it was the head trauma or the fact he’d just gotten sloppy lately, but Keigo didn’t even notice the oddly large amount of shattered glass at the scene or the shadows that loomed and weaved without rest nearby, though they never moved to the offensive. 

...

You sat on your couch, boot propped up (as usual), and a pillow hugged in your arms. 

Typically, you weren’t one to watch the news, but the moment you’d seen the alert from your phone about ‘large scale villain attack- Hawks and Miruko on the scene!, you’d rushed to turn on any channel that had coverage.

Which, creating a sense of dread in your gut, was most of them.

You watched the varying camera angles of the fight, squeezing the pillow tightly in your arms like the pressure would comfort you.

 The fear and terror was such a contrast to the absolute bliss of the first couple of weeks of you and Keigo’s relationship.

During that time, your text-based communication hardly changed, still ambiently throughout the day and including the exchange of many memes and well-placed photographs and selfies. 

The messages had changed, somewhat, truth be told. There was a sweetness to it, soft, warm, and new. The bantering never stopped, but woven within each of your words were small, tender lines that were new to you both.

Wonderfully new.

You found that Keigo was particularly affectionate over text, but it was nothing compared to him in-person.

You hadn’t really expected him to be clingy. Not based on the way he texted and talked previously and how he was generally portrayed by the public.

But god, was he.

He came over several other nights, always bearing food, drinks, and a bright smile. He wouldn’t even think of settling for the evening in the comfort of your couch (or bed) until you’d been showered in kisses and teasing touches, always seeming hungry, maybe even starved. 

He was careful, however, to never go too far or touch too much. 

When you two would finally settle on the couch, usually finding yourself strewn over each other in some way, Keigo would continue heaping on affection in any way he could, subtle or otherwise. You returned the gestures, giving your own too.

You craved the heat of his body in the same way he hungered for yours. 

You found that, as the nights would wear on, he tended to slip his rough hands under any top you might be wearing, settling his grip on your sides or back. He’d either press and massage, or just ambiently draw shapes. At first, you thought it was some sort of sexual preamble, expecting his touch to drift higher and hungrier.

 It took you a night or two of it to realize it wasn’t like that at all— 

Keigo just craved contact.

It all made sense, though your revelation surprised you a bi at first. 

One night, with his head in your lap, you had simply hummed out, “I never thought you’d be touch-starved.”

Keigo hummed as you ran your nails around the shell of his ear, “Mind elaborating on that one?”

“You’re always touching me when we’re together,” You replied simply, heart squeezing at the little twinges of anxiety you could see forming around Keigo’s eyes. “Not that it's a bad thing— I really love all of it, it’s just sweet. I didn’t think you’d be so affectionate and touchy. I would dare to say, it's cute.”

That comment turned Keigo’s cheeks bright red, though you hardly got much of a chance to tease him about it before he was on you with another wave of soft kisses and squeezes.

Maybe, you were a little touch-starved yourself.

And definitely, surely, falling into each other simply and sweetly felt like heaven. 

 ...

 But all of that syrupy goodness was gone, the flavor of it stale and rotten.

All you could focus on was your TV screen as Hawks was being pulled from an alleyway. The camera angle was poor, the quality shaky, but the picture was clear as day to you.

Keigo was walking, barely, most of his weight bared into Miruko’s side. He looked half-dead when he first emerged, limbs twisted painfully and face downcast.

He brightened up a moment later. You weren’t even sure that anyone would’ve caught the change in his expression if they didn’t know him as intimately as you did.

 Your chest tightened painfully when he gave his most dashing smile, pearly white teeth stained with blood that was rushing from a wide cut on his forehead. The juxtaposition of him being purely fucked up mixed with the shining expressions he was flashing at the media made your stomach churn with dread.

He’s hurt.

And it seems bad.

You chewed your bottom lip until it ached. 

The newscast kept playing, showing the wreckage of the scene, all of the hurt civilians— it was a few cities over, but you swore you could hear the sirens just outside of your window.

You dug around for your phone, typing out a message to Keigo, fingers shaking as you did.

 [you]: hey i saw about the attack? how are you doing?

 Texting him was the bare minimum, wasn’t it? If you could, you’d call. But based on the way he was reported to have been taken to a nearby hospital, he wouldn’t be answering his phone any time soon. 

It didn’t feel like enough, but what more could you do?

You felt uncomfortably powerless.

A very lucid, perhaps cruel part of your mind rang out amid your quiet panic:

Get used to it.

 You fell back into the cushions, unable to turn off the screen, though unable to do anything other than watch and churn. 

 |||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||

 Keigo didn’t have a great recollection of the day's events after sustaining his fairly significant head injury, not to mention the shattering of the bones in his right arm and a few in his left leg. Not to mention his sorely dislocated shoulder. 

Pain blotted things out memory, he knew.

Hospital trips were few and far between for Keigo, but in the unfortunate circumstance he was stuck and strung up with wires and IV tubes, he was more than well taken care of. 

He was aware, somewhat, of the Commission’s hold on the scruff of his neck, though complacent in it. His good attitude and impeccable, nearly-perfect performance earned him the best medical care they could provide. 

Some sweet girl, a student from the west, was brought in to heal his wounds. Healing quirks of any significance were rare, so it was always interesting to see how they worked and manifested.

The girl’s quirk came at the price of any energy his body had, but he was completely patched up in a number of minutes. Fatigue be damned, he was happy to be quickly and easily put back together. He made sure to put on his best camera-ready smile as the girl traced symbols on the backs of his hands, fingers shaking and shyly smiling.

She was probably starstruck, all things considered. Meanwhile, Keigo was exhausted and out of it.

All through it, all of it, the actual fight and subsequent medical nightmare, he had slipped into a far different mindset than the one he’d been occupying for the last couple of weeks. 

Consequently, he hadn’t thought of you at all. 

You didn’t even cross his mind. 

Keigo could’ve blamed it on hitting his head, but that wouldn’t be entirely fair or truthful. 

All the same, the absence would burn later. 

...

Keigo flashed a dopey smile to the door of his hospital room when he spotted a familiar puff of bright yellow hair. 

Despite his stupor, familiarity still resonated. Besides, his PA stuck out like a sore thumb amongst the greyscale scrubs and antiseptic. 

“Akane! I knew you’d never be far in my time of need,” Keigo relaxed against the hospital bed he was still resigned to. He was to be discharged as soon as possible for the bevy of press reports he would had to complete. Not to mention the mountains of paperwork he’d probably have to file and sign. 

Akane kept a stern but humored expression as she shooed a nurse out of Keigo’s room. She was shorter than most, face cut with sharp angles and high ridges. They were dressed immaculately as always, a well-tailored black suit with crisp-looking dress shoes. All professionalism, trained and honed by the Commission in a similar way to Keigo, though it was implicitly recognized. 

“You’ve got a press conference in thirty with Miruko,” Akane didn’t answer his greeting, though Keigo could tell by their quick nod that it was at least acknowledged. They rolled a small suitcase next to the bed. “Extra hero costume in there. I called your normal hair and makeup, they’ll be in a few minutes after I leave. It’s been a while since you’ve been this injured in a fight, so put on a good show for everyone, won’t you?”

Akane’s sarcasm always brought a smile to his face, contrasting so starkly with their well-pressed hems and seams. 

Keigo quickly sat up, dropping his feet to the cold linoleum below, “Always a show.”

He quickly began to re-robe into his new garments, tired mind returning to its trained roots. 

 ||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||

 You had been watching the newscast for hours, probably (definitely) against your best interest.

You’d have plenty of time to kick yourself for it later.

You couldn’t stop watching the repetitive footage and bland media, despite the report that ‘Hawks’ was safe, well and receiving treatment. 

Until you saw him, you couldn’t rest—- Or that’s what it felt like, anyway.

The image of him bloodied felt painfully etched into the forefront of your mind. The contours and highlights of Keigo’s wounds were uncomfortably bright and hot, nestled next to swirling images of your own. Uncomfortably vivid sensations and colors of your own stitched-up wounds that once wept blood themselves.

If you steeped in it all too deeply or for too long, your breathing would quicken, memories unbridled in the way they sucked down.

Sweat dripping down your brow, you willed your breath even and slowly despite how you definitely were having trouble handling what you were experiencing. 

As the evening wore into night, you remained wired.

You convinced yourself, despite the thorns that ran deep, you would be able to rest once you saw Keigo well. 

Eventually, there was an announcement for a late press conference, a conclusion to the media frenzy.

You knew you’d stay up for it, no matter how long it took to air. You knew he was fine, it had been confirmed over and over throughout the coverage, but it wasn’t enough.

You just need to see him.

Then you’ll be fine.  

Keigo is fine.

No amount of reassurance comforted you. You were sinking too deeply in your throes, ungrounded and crackling within your own fragile mind. 

The memories of blood and gore and hot, white fear rolled over you, suffocatingly close to how you’d felt less than a month prior. 

On the cold cement floor of the tea shop, you had Keigo’s feather, the knowingness that he would be there.

Yet, now?

You were alone in your dim apartment. 

No Keigo.

No villains.

Just you and your skull. 

 You had to pull yourself back when you felt your quirk begin to activate with your adrenaline, thankful for the low stimulation of your apartment, and the pillow in your arms being exchanged for the plushie Keigo had gifted you. You forced yourself to ground, counting your breaths, and holding yourself together. 

(Maybe the trauma of your own run-in was deeper than you wanted to acknowledge.)

You pushed the thought aside as the live footage of the press conference began. It was better to compartmentalize it all, wasn’t it? Why not shove it back where it was easier to not deal with? You’d get a therapist or something.

If Keigo is okay, you’ll be okay. 

The press conference decor was coated with the diamond insignia of the Public Safety Hero Commission, along with a few sponsors and nearby police departments. Local heroes and police officers sat around microphones with plastic waterbottles, ringing around the focal points of the events:

Keigo and Miruko. 

Seeing him, perfectly in uniform and switched-on didn’t make you feel better.

If anything, it made you feel worse. 

Before everything, when he was just your regular you pined after, you saw and heard of him doing heroic duties all the time.

But, it was different when Keigo was your partner, yet living an entirely different reality from yours. In the safety of your apartment, and formerly the teashop, that line of difference was somewhat blurred, or, it at least appeared to be.

But while Keigo was shiny and dazzling, charismatic and blunt as ever on the stage of the conference, the contrast turned polar. 

As there was a jeer of laughter, Keigo grinning as Miruko clapped a hand on his back, your stomach rolled. 

Seeing him fine and good-as-new wasn’t soothing.

It was like pouring moonshine on a brush fire. 

Every moment of the conference highlighted the separation between the two of you, the feeling of fear and now loss so strongly in your mind, it started to taste like the tannin of a rotten wine . 

The concoction was made even viler as the memories of injuries didn’t fade or falter.

Your chest ached.

 The press conference droned on in front of you, but none of the content of it registered. It was all sickly background noise to your own pains

You pressed the plushie against your stomach, ignoring the phantom stabs of rancid-yellow that traced up your leg from your booted foot. 

...

“From what we can surmise, there’s activity of several different villain groups in this area that are connected. This incident is related.”

...

You were getting to yourself, you had been all evening. The problem was you couldn’t climb out— 

Not if you weren’t honest and self-aware.

Too bad you were actively spiraling away from anything even close to the latter and former. 

...

“There is much we don’t know at this time, but it is clear there must be further investigation into the roots of the attack.”

...

You recognized, even then, that Keigo was going to be in harm's way because of his job, constantly. He was always in danger.

It just felt different, having to see it play out in front of you, isolated from him in all ways except the glimmer he showed the cameras and the gore he bore prior. 

The absences burned. 

 Your gaze moved to your phone, the device still dormant. 

With a thick, sticky swallow, you resigned yourself to sitting back into the cushions of your couch, spiraling and numbing as you had been hours. 

 |||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||

 Following the press conference, Keigo had one priority— 

Sleep.

Despite Akane’s nagging that they ‘really needed to talk to him’, Keigo was exhausted after being healed and wanted nothing more than to go home and rest for as long as he could make himself lay still. 

Maybe, he could’ve handled a patrol (if he had had anything significant of his wings left), but he could not stand the idea of dealing with bureaucratic bullshit in his wrung-out state. 

At this admission, Akane sighed, pinching the bridge of her nose. 

“Fine, but you need to come to the office as soon as possible,” Akane seemed exasperated after such a long evening (now night), of dealing with the attack. “Seriously, or your publicist is going to kick both of our asses.”

Keigo didn’t ponder too far into the topic of whatever Akane needed him for. Far too mentally wiped-out to bother with what was undoubtedly bureaucratic bullshit. 

He rolled his eyes, sending a feather forward to trigger the automatic doors ahead, “I’ll be sure to come in— It’s not like I don’t have a backlog of paperwork to finish.”

“That too,” Akane sighed, pausing outside of the doors, just dimly lit under the lip of the entrance of the building. “Feel better, quick. And please, stay safe.”

Keigo raised an eyebrow, “You know I always am. I’ll see you around tomorrow, bright and early.”

Keigo flew away so quickly, he didn't notice Akane’s pinched expression and set jaw and she waved goodbye. 

 ...

Nearly featherless and on the edge of total exhaustion, Keigo dragged himself back to his penthouse. His mind and body ached, his thoughts messy and disorganized. 

It wasn’t an entirely unfamiliar state, though he didn’t get to it often. 

He had ample training to not get like this. The fuzziness he was clouded by should’ve been tossed aside easily; he blamed his own overcast on the healing he received.

(And, not that he, perhaps, had more on his mind as of late) 

More on his mind meant more to forget. 

It wasn’t until he toweled off from a quick shower that he even looked at his phone. 

It wasn’t until he saw your single text that you even came to his mind.

Keigo called you nearly instantly, jaw going tight.

It made sense that he’d forget, he rationalized. 

The portion of his psyche that was trained to be a hero was the same part that struggled the most with his feelings for you. All of the affection, validation, and deep admiration (and perhaps more) was slowly but surely allowing long-dormant parts of him to awaken— 

Yet, all of the new roots and growth aside, he’d forgotten about you in the chaos of the day. 

Maybe a passing, subconscious twinge in his gut, but otherwise? Nothing. 

A bit of guilt chewed him as the line began to ring. 

 You laid across your couch, curled up with the plushie in your arms. The news reports played like white noise, your mind long having gone to gum and static. You alternated between different horrors of memory and sensation. 

The buzzing and shrill sound of your ringtone made your jump, pulling you from your stupor.

 [birdboy <3] calling...

 You immediately picked up the call.

“Keigo?” You asked, trying to ignore the continual light shaking of your hands. 

“Hey, dove,” His voice was cool and calm. “Sorry, I just saw your message now. I figure you saw all the news, but I’m all good, no worries! How are you?”

Oh.

Was it that easy?

The gears in your skull turned far slower than you wanted them to.

He’s fine, (Y/N).

He’s so unbothered. 

Everything is fine.

You tried to comfort yourself, taking a few methodical breaths.

“Dove? Are you there?”

Get your shit together.

“Yeah, I am.” You shook your head. “I was worried, that’s all. My bad. I’m glad you’re okay.”

“The news really plays things up, huh?” Keigo laughed with a sigh, scratchy from the speaker. “Sorry about the media circus. They like the drama.”

“Uh-huh.” You replied, feeling yourself begin to spin all over again.

Drama.

Dramatics.

...

Calm down.

It wasn’t that simple.

“Hey, dove, are you alright?” Keigo spoke casually from the line. Maybe there was some concern in his tone (or you just wanted there to be). You couldn’t fully tell.

You sank back into the couch, bending your good leg into your chest, “I was just worried, is all. I freaked myself out.”

“I’m sorry about that, angel,” Keigo clicked from the phone. “I don’t get banged up too often. Besides, they always stitch me back together quickly! It’s just like this sometimes.”

“‘It’s just like this sometimes’,” You repeat mechanically, processing so slowly it was painful. Your voice sounded far off— 

You felt like you were drowning.

Why couldn’t you handle seeing him hurt?

It’s part of his job. 

Why does this all feel so bad?

 “Can you come over?” You asked, praying that he’d say yes, and maybe, maybe, you could have your fears be assuaged with some contact. Some support— 

“Sorry, dove, the healer they got for me really drained me,” Keigo yawned from the other side of the line. “I think I’m gonna hit the hay. But, tomorrow is just an office day for me, so I can come by after?”

Your heart sank in your chest, faster and harder than you could try to make yield.

“That works,” You replied, despite how rotten you felt. “Take care, okay? Get some rest.”

You hung up abruptly, not waiting for his reply, and lowering your head.

Tears drip from your eyes, soaking the plushie in your arms as you finally let out the sobs you had been holding back for hours.

 ...

 Despite Keigo’s exhaustion, he knew that the entire phone call was so off. You’d never hung up that quickly before, and you sounded a bit off.

None of it sat right. 

He shot off a kind text or two before knocking out for the night, nodding off just after sending them.

 ...

 You hardly slept. 

You felt like you were being eaten alive as the night wore on and the moon remained high.

It was all metastasized, unchecked. Breathing exercises had stopped cutting it at some point, your own thoughts and methodical actions lost in the soup of it all. 

You ‘rationalized’. 

He’s a fucking hero, he’s going to get hurt. It’s part of the job and you need to get over it.

That doesn’t matter! It’s still terrifying to see someone you care about super injured!

You knew all of that though.

None of it was new.

What was new, and harder to understand, was the storm that had buried itself like a barbed arrow between the two halves of your brain.

The rest of it.

The complex miasma of feelings that were only set off by the events and subsequent feelings you tried to rationalize. 

The mental thunder-cracks kept you tossing and turning, any sleep light and flighty. Your eyes burned and dripped through the entire night, soaking your pillowcase. 

By the time morning light began to shift in from the heavy curtains of your bedroom, you might’ve felt worse than you did the night prior.

Your mouth was dry, tongue tacky, and swollen in your mouth. You forced yourself out of bed, methodically showering despite all of the energy it took with your leg still recovering. 

You felt hazy beyond belief, fatigued, and purely awful.

Quickly, you nested for the day, still damp from your shower and sore from your lack of sleep. Tucking into the couch, you covered yourself with blankets and held the plushie to your chest, not even bothering to turn on the TV.

 Keigo, meanwhile, prepped for his office day. Since his wings were sparse, he made an extra effort for his face. Bit of concealer to brighten his dark circles and smooth out the finer lines around his brow and under his eyes.

It seemed pertinent to cover more, wipe away his anxieties as his gaze flickered to his phone on the countertop of his bathroom.

You’d never responded the night before. You hadn’t said anything— not even giving an indication that you’d seen the message.

Truthfully, now that the drum of the press and his de-facto role had died down, your lack of contact filled him with burning anxiety. 

You two had a habit of texting each other in the mornings, little sweet greetings and the occasional messy selfie that the other adored. Keigo typically woke up earlier than you, but still. 

He gave you a call.

 You robotically picked up on the second ring, hardly looking at your phone and its caller as you held it to your ear, “Hello?”

“Hey, angel!” Keigo’s voice seemed too chipper from the other side of the line. “I just wanted to call and check-in. You just sounded a bit off last night, is all. Are you doing okay?”

“Oh,” You sounded hollow, far-off, and sticky. 

There was a pause, your numbed out psyche far-too slow and miswired to say anything else.

“(Y/N)?” Keigo asked. “Are you there?”

Your name shoved you a bit closer to reality. 

 “Yeah, I am.” You blinked, your name making you twitch, “Sorry, I’m just not feeling well.”

“Awww, since last night too?” Keigo’s wings beat in the background of the call. “Is that why you wanted me to come over?”

Sort of, not really.

Your voice shook as you quickly were losing the will to keep it even, “U-um—”

How do you even explain?

Your quirk spun alive, the feeling of shrapnel and rusted nails running jagged lines down your spine.

You need to be honest.

“I j-just,” You sniffled back tears, though fruitlessly. “I just got really scared.”

You covered your mouth with your hand, holding the phone away from your mouth and praying that Keigo couldn’t hear the muffled sobs you forced to stay in your throat.

 “It’s alright, I’m okay!” He tried to assure you, tensing at the doorway to his balcony. “Everything is totally fine, there’s no reason to be scared.”

You went quiet on the other side of the receiver, all sound muffled and mixed. It made Keigo chew his lip, tightening his grip on the phone.

“I know.” Your voice broke at the same moment as Keigo’s chest tightened. You sounded so hurt. 

It pricked those seldom-used parts of his brain alive. 

It was those weird tingles and shooting bits of cortisol that screamed ‘protect them’. They screamed to life at your distress, hot and bright.

“Dove, are you alright? Are you crying?” Panic seeped into his tone as his feathers rippled from soft to razor-sharp in his instinctual rise. 

“I just got so f-fucking scared,” You choked, voice fizzling on the line. “Keigo, I’m sorry, I just— “

Your voice broke into tears, sobs echoing from the phone.

Keigo’s grip tightened, heart-pounding and feathers vibrating.

He acted before thinking too hard about it. 

“(Y/N), I’m gonna come over, okay? I’ll be there soon,” Keigo assured you, and himself, truthfully as he tore open his balcony door and launched into the sky

 You sputtering out an affirmative as wind-whipped into the receiver. 

Burying your face in your hands, you felt dread weigh you down from the inside out. 

 ||||||||||||||||||||

 ko-fi

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taglist: @thepandapopo @hawksexual @sinclairsamess  @darcia22 @inhalingsoysauce @yee-fxcking-haw @aproperthottie @seasalttrioforever @msgrungie @mia--merc @a-monsters-love @peach-buns-unicorns@amethyst-rose-17 @mega-bastard @an-untamed-rose @ravioliplease @keigosangel @gobestupidelsewhere

(send me an ask if you would like to be added!)

[holylulusworld]

Beta is not a 4-letter word

Request: Inspired by unbeta’d, how about reader is one of the fellow Hunter, she’s beta so no one in hunting community wants to work with her. She’s forced to work with Sam & Dean, who also treat her different, like really insulting, taunting her, making fun of her, teasing. One day a witch curses Dean making him a beta permanently. He blames reader for that but eventually realizes his mistake. They make up then. Super angsty tho 

Pairing: Alpha!Dean x Beta!Reader, Alpha!Sam, Beta!Dean x Beta!Reader

Warnings: angst, Sam and Dean being douches, sad reader, mentions of sex, ABO

Always the same game. You find a case that needs more than one hunter, but no one offers his or her help.

Your last resort was Garth, the kind Alpha was the only one who ever helped you with cases, well till he got bitten by a werewolf. Now he has got a family and he suggested two of his friends shall help you.

You hate it. Hate the way the smaller Alpha looks at you as if you are a fly on his steak or a weak little kid telling him you want take out a nest of vamps. You can see it in his eyes, he doesn’t like you and your presentation a bit.

Good thing you insisted on meeting up with them on neutral ground or they would have started to taunt you shamelessly. In public, they need to get their shit together.

At least you hope so…

“A beta, Sammy. Why did we agree to help a weak little girl?” Dean, the elder brother groans, not caring you sit right next to him. He acts as if you are not around, shakes his head at the information you handed them as if your research bores him.

Used to rough treatment, harsh words, and insults you swallow your pride. It is not as if you could take both Winchesters, the legends among the hunter, down but so far – you did not get yourself killed.

“Garth asked us, Dean. According to our werewolf ‘slash’ hunter friend she is good at hunting witches. Now let us talk about the case.” Chortling Dean glances at you, not giving you a chance to say anything he gets up to circle you like prey.

You feel like an insect under a microscope as the Alpha seems to drink your appearance in. 

“Coming from our werewolf hunter?” Dean huffs as you try to push the tears away. You are used to hunters being rough around you, but Dean wants to push your boundaries. 

“Weak and meek, Sammy. A Beta should not hunt.”

“So far I did it without an Alpha’s help, but this witch is dangerous, and I assume she does not work alone. Many people died or disappeared.”

Your body goes stiff when Dean nudges your side and you can’t do anything else than shove his hand away.

“Weak and soft. I don’t think she could even punch my nose, Sammy.” Dean snickers as Sam give him a dirty grin. “We shouldn’t let kids hunt.”

“I asked Garth for help as I am not suicidal and want to the killings as fast as possible.” Wiping your nose with the sleeve of your blouse you try to prepare yourself for the next blow.

“Dean is right, Y/N. You seem to be a nice girl but let’s face the truth. You will not withstand a blow coming from a witch or werewolf.” 

Sam’s words hurt you even more. Garth said the younger brother is more sensitive but here he is, giving you the feeling, you are worthless.

“I never said I am as strong as an Alpha, but I can stand my ground. I took out a whole nest of vamps. I know you believe I am not a good hunter, but I found the witch and want to take her down. I asked for help, not for another beta-bashing.” Getting up you try to look taller but all you get is a chuckle from Sam and a stupid comment from Dean.

“Even if you climb on a ladder you will always be a tiny and pitiful girl. Let’s face it, you’ll get me, and Sammy killed.” While you try not to cry you look around the crowded restaurant.

You don’t want to lose your composure in the middle of a restaurant, where families try to have a good time. 

The hope that the Winchesters would treat you equal, or at least would not make fun of you got ripped into pieces within not even half an hour.

“I think it’s for the best if you let us take over the case. Go to your motel room, take a few days off and maybe you should turn toward research.” There is a smirk on Sam’s lips as he shoves your notes toward you.

“Whoa…the infamous Winchesters are nothing but self-centered and instinct-driven Alphas. Shame I believed you are better than all the other knot-heads. That was the last time I asked for help.” Tossing money onto the table you look straight into Dean’s face.

“What little girl? Do you want me to soothe you? Do you need a tissue?” Dean mocks you, tries to push you even further but you will not give him any kind of satisfaction.

“You know, Beta is not a 4-letter word. I am not as strong as you but unlike you and your brother, I can control my needs. I am not an instinct-driven animal during ruts, heats, or crap. I always let my brain decide, not my reproductive organ.” Sneering you grab your notes before you look at Dean one last time.

“Only as you do not have heats does not mean your brain works better than mine or Sammy’s. Beta stands for weakness.” Nodding you take a deep breath.

“Right. I love your and the other Alphas prejudices. But you know what? I can fall in love without my instinct telling me I have to bite someone’s neck.” Before you look at Dean, hoping he would let your words sink in.

“What?” Dean jumps up to tower over you, but you act as if his size would not intimidate you. “Anything to add to your stupid speech?”

“Be careful. That witch likes to fuck with your mind and even more important…” Stepping closer you give him a cold smile. “She seems to like to kill assholes. In your case, you run around with a target pinned to your back.”

When you walk out of the restaurant you swallow hard. You may have lost your case, but at least you kept your dignity and did not beg them to let you participate on the hunt.

While you wipe a few tears away you get your phone out to dial Garth’s number. 

“I wanted to say thank you for sending me the biggest assholes on earth for help. That was the reason I asked you for help. All other Alphas…”

Garth can hear the tiny sobs leave your lips and his stomach drops. He believed Sam and Dean would treat you with respect, not act like the other Alphas hurting you.

“I am sorry, Garth. It’s just…” Sniffling you wipe the tears away. 

“I thought the Winchesters would be different. I will never annoy you again. From now on, I’ll handle my cases alone. It doesn’t matter in the end if I die…”

While you sulk in self-pity, hating you ever called Garth, the Winchesters play the great heroes once again – at least you assume they do so, as you are not invited to your party.

Same game – every time. How could you believe they would be any different? They are Alphas and men, none of them would ever consider you can handle a hunt, let alone work with them.

With shaking fingers, you check on the collected information once again. You should send Sam a message, tell him you believe that something is fishy about the absence of the witch, but you decide against it.

You offered all your information, your knowledge, and strength. “They got this, Y/N. Don’t give them the chance to make fun of you even more…”

“You are an interesting little insect, hunter. I knew the moment she called you, I found my new favorite victim.” Snickering the witch claps her hand before she throws something at Dean. 

“Bitch! You knew she called us?” Dean groans, glancing at his unconscious brother. “Does she work with you? Did the Beta kid ask you to take us down?”

“Are you that blind, hunter? That girl was so close to taking me down and unlike you, she could have made it. Her heart is pure, she never made fun of anyone. I could never weaken her as I weakened you, hunter.” The witch snickers and Dean wonders what she means.

“Pure heart?”

“Yeah. She told you – right? Yesterday, at the restaurant she told you I go after what did she say…” Smirking the witch moves her fingers through Sam’s hair. “Ah…she said I go after assholes. The kid was right.”

“It was a trap…great. That stupid Beta hunter gets us killed…” Grunting Dean tries to get his gun out.

“You still don’t get it, hunter. If you would not have treated her like all the other Alphas did, I wouldn’t have any influence on you. Good people like her, the ones never hurting someone on purpose do not fall victim to my powers…now…”

“I’ll kill you, bitch and then I’ll kill her…” 

“Hush now, hunter. I think you deserve a special gift, not just death. You caused pain; I’ll show you what she felt…” Blinding light fills the room and Dean falls to his knees, feeling lightheaded before he loses consciousness.

Checking your gun again, you sigh deeply. Over the last three days, two more people disappeared. You’ve got no clue why – but the Winchesters didn’t take the witch down.

Now you are on your way out of town to drive to her house, or rather Mansion to end the job you started. 

This time there will be no Alpha providing back-up, but also you will not hear any insults. 

The house is dark, almost like a Gothic dream and you’d like to have a look around, but you’ve got a job to do so you silently walk further into the house.

Oddly, the door with a strange sigil on it opens and you can see the witch sits onto a chair, legs crossed she grins at you.

“Here we go.” She says, something sinister in her voice. “Did you miss your friends or rather enemies? You can have him back or both. Just say the words.”

“What do you mean? I have no friends.” Your voice is controlled as you aim a gun toward her head. “Witch killing bullets. Don’t try to trick me, I did my homework.”

“I know, sweet little Beta. Unlike those Winchesters, you did not storm into my house without a charm or a pure soul.” Now she claps her hands and the room changes and you are suddenly in a dungeon.

“What did you do to them?” While Dean kneels in a corner, shaking, Sam tries to calm his brother. “I asked you a question.” Firing a bullet into the witch’s leg you clench your jaw. “Release them, now!”

“Fine…” Clapping her hands again the witch let the chains holding the Winchester disappear. “I made him a gift, but he does not like it.” Snickering the witch presses one hand onto her bleeding wound.

“Take it back! NOW!” Gun aimed at her head you narrow your eyes as Sam calls your name. “NOW!”

“Impossible.” Sam sighs. “She used something unique, it got destroyed and now Dean is…” Choking the word out Sam tries to find the right word.

“He is what?” Panicked you hear Sam whisper the word ‘beta’ and you want to laugh loudly but Dean’s low whines let you remain silent.

“You sure she can’t take it back, Sam?”

“One-hundred percent…” Dean grunts. “That’s your fault! She did it because of you!” Flinching you try to ignore Dean’s outburst.

“No, hunter. It’s your fault.” The witch coos. “I did it as you acted like an asshole. Now let negotiate…” She cannot lull you into kind words as you pull the trigger and a bullet ends her life.

“We’ve got to bring him out of here and check if we find anything to help your brother.” Ignoring your words Sam helps his brother up, not even giving you a second glance.

“Stay away from us, Beta. You did enough.” Dean snarls as you must watch them leave you alone with the dead witch.

“Leave me be! I am useless now. How can I be a hunter when I am Beta now! I can’t even scent you, Sam.” Dean barks.

The Winchesters do not know your room is next to theirs, you didn’t know either before you heard Dean smash things against the walls. “I hate being weak!”

“Dean calm down. You are still strong enough to push me to the floor! You lifted the goddamn table as if it weighs nothing. Apparently, your strength had nothing to do with your presentation.”

Dean drops the lamp he was about to throw against the wall, realizing he does not feel weaker. The only difference is his brothers’ scent does not make him want to dominate Sam.

“I…I am not weak?” Falling onto the bed Dean looks at his hands.

“Your instinct is gone, your ruts and the need to claim and knot an Omega, everything else is still normal.” Sam tries to calm his brother.

“I was an asshole and she punished me. Made me Beta.” Sam runs one hand through his hair, nodding silently.

“That witch had a sense of humor like Gabriel. She liked to fuck with people treating others badly. Y/N, she saved us, and I was an ass all over again.”

“She’s in the room right next to ours. Watched her sneak in and she did not leave so far. Maybe you should talk to her.”

“Hmm…”

“What do you want, Dean? Telling me it’s my fault you are a pitiful Beta now?”

Sighs leave your lips as Dean stands in front of your motel room. “I called a few people, Betas who are familiar with magic and witchcraft. I hope they can turn you back into an Alpha.”

“Listen…” Dean nervously chews on his lower lip before he decides to enter your room. “I could use advice in being Beta. I…I was an Alpha asshole so far and don’t know how to act like a Beta.”

“Not being an asshole is all it needs. Now if you would leave my room, I’d gladly go back to being a weak and meek Beta.” A chuckle leaves Dean’s lips as he plops down onto your bed. “I mean it…”

“You know…” Eying you warily Dean gives you a cocky grin. “Now that I am Beta we could let out all this pent-up tension. I thought about having sex as a Beta with you.”

“Did I have a stroke or did this shit just leave your lips?” Pushing against Dean’s shoulders you snicker as he feels your strength.

“You’re strong for such a tiny girl. How about I’ll give you advice on how to kick an Alpha’s ass and you help me with all this new crap I have to get used to.”

Dean’s eyes search your face and for the first time, you see he doesn’t want to make fun of you.

“What do you want to know, Dean?”

“Uh—food! Do you eat differently? Will I gain weight? How about sex? How does it work? I mean you do not scent an Alpha…how does…” Pressing your index finger to his lips you chuckle lightly.

“Everything is like it used to be when you were Alpha, okay. Except for the scenting and knotting part. Your uh…you know��� will not expand but it should work like it used to do.” Nodding Dean scratches his chin.

“What if he’s smaller now? I mean Beta’s have smaller dicks…right?” Now you cackle as you glance at the bulge in his pants.

“I think this shouldn’t be a problem. Just go out and try it…him…I mean. Gosh, go find a girl and have sex. I can’t believe I said that…” 

“Can I try something? I want to know how it feels to touch a girl now. Please?” Groaning you fall onto your bed, covering your eyes with your hands. “Just your thigh…can I?”

“If you stop asking questions, you can touch my skin.” Humming Dean slides his fingers over your skin. There is a small smile on his lips as he can feel goosebumps erupt all over your skin.

“I think I owe you an apology for being a dick. I am sorry that I said all those stupid things. You are smart, strong and cute.”

The last word catches your attention and you remove your hands from your eyes to look at Dean. “I’d like to test it with you…not now…I mean…fuck…one day…”

“Can you not talk for a moment. I am getting a terrible headache.” While Dean lies next to you, just looking at you none of you says a word.

“We have a safe home, you know. I could ask Sammy, as he’s the Alpha now but I’d like you to come with us. I need my Yoda after all…” Laughing you punch Dean’s arm and he joins your laughter.

“I am no Yoda…”

“Fine. You can be my Lea. Now tell me everything about being Beta…”

>> Part 2

Tags in reblog.

[toycarousel]

Desperate Measures

(Homestuck, Cronus Ampora x Listener SFW Gore Script).

***This script was written by the wonderful melodiousclockwork, and sent to me to be recorded as a commission~! The full script is beneath the readmore -- though this is a SFW script (with a SFW audio following behind it) please heed the warnings!!!

Summary: You're in a stable, romantic relationship with Cronus, who has recently found a way to finally live on Earth with you.  Unfortunately, he can't pass off his appearance as "just a costume" forever, so to keep him safe, and under the radar, you both agree to make permanent alterations to his body.

Warnings: Fairly descriptive gore (horn related), sharp objects, swearing.

 Desperate Measures (Cronus/Listener gore):

***Bigender Cronus, currently identifying as male, thus he/his/himself pronouns. This should not affect how he is voiced.

(On a version of Earth where trolls have no established colony yet, you and CRONUS are living together after he recently found his way here. The two of you have been communicating long before his arrival, and had become an item after some time. Seeing him before you had filled you with immense joy, but now you worry, realizing that he'd be a target the way he is now. You could pass off his alien appearance as a costume...but not for long. The two of you conclude that you must help him disguise himself as human for his own safety, leading the both of you to come up with a plan in your bedroom)

CRONUS: So I'm thinkin' we could use makeup to hide the whole gray skin thing. I could use nail polish to cover my natural nail color. No clue what we can do about my teeth.


(You inform him that some people have their teeth filed into points for cosmetic purposes)


CRONUS: Oh, okay! Yeah, that'll make things a little easier, since we could claim it was a cosmetic procedure. Now, I think it's about time we address the biggest issue. The things we can't really hide or explain away. Somethin's gotta be done about my horns, eyes, fins, and gills. Those would be the biggest giveaway and the hardest to hide convincingly.


(You mention sclera contacts as an option, mentioning that they aren't exactly easy to use or light on the wallet, but would be worth it if they'd help keep him safe)

CRONUS: Alright, there's that pretty much covered then, so long as we can find some appropriate ones. But what about the rest? As much as I hate to say it...I think my horns will need to be...


(You ask him what he thinks needs to be done, though you can already see where this is going)


CRONUS: (gulps) ...Removed. Permanently.


(Your heart sinks at the thought, and you are silent. Though you know it's probably the only option, his horns are one of your favorite of his physical features, and you can only imagine how painful removing them will be for him on all levels)

CRONUS: And my fins...might need to be altered or cut off. My gills will probably need to be...stitched shut. Maybe they could be passed off as scars from some sort of terrible accident, or maybe a run-in with some bad people. And I can't bleed at all in public...


(You're having a hard time accepting the likely necessity of such extreme permanent alterations, prompting you to state how there must be some other way, though you know your words are fueled by denial)

CRONUS: I know neither of us really wanna do this, but you said yourself that it's too dangerous for me to go around how I am now. What other choices do we have, realistically, if I'm gonna live here?


(You mention the lack of a dehorning tool; you aren't sure one of those would even work on CRONUS' magnificent set of horns, but it's still a concern)

CRONUS: What, you don't have a saw?


(You tell him that sounds like a terrible idea; you know you aren't comfortable with the thought, at least)


CRONUS: It probably is a terrible idea. But which is the worse idea: Sawing off my horns or suffering at the hands of some prick because I didn't?


(You acknowledge that he has a point, but then recall that you have no access to any type of anesthetic, voicing this concern to CRONUS)


CRONUS: (with unconvincing bravado) I'll deal with the pain. I'm tough.


(You fret over the possibility of fucking up; both of you know he can't be taken to the hospital if something goes awry)


CRONUS: (choking up) If I bleed out, at least I'll die in the arms of the person I love.


(You argue that he'd be dying because of you; you could never forgive yourself if you let the love of your life die)


CRONUS: I'd hope you could forgive yourself someday. I wouldn't blame you for my death. It would be an accident... (attempting to reassure you and himself) But hey, that's if it happens. It probably won't.


(You confess that you are afraid, since it's a very real possibility)


CRONUS: (voice low, thick with dread and anxiety) Babe...can we  stop talkin' about dyin'? Let's just...work out how we're gonna do this. I don't think we need to talk about the risks, we already know them. At this point, bringing them up is just gonna make this harder on us both.


(You're silent for a moment before admitting he's right and apologizing. You tell him to head for the bathroom while you go grab a hacksaw from the garage)

CRONUS: (attempting to calm down) Alright, Cronus, you've got this. You can do this. Remember why you're gonna go through all this pain...

(CRONUS places a folded towel on the floor before lying down, his head on the towel)

CRONUS: (managing to regain some bravado) You're not just doing it for you. You're doing it for them. So you can be here with the one you love.

(CRONUS stops when he hears you coming up the stairs. You place a cooler to one side before you straddle his chest, pinning him and giving yourself some leverage. You take CRONUS' face in your hands and kiss him before moving his hair away from his horns in a last tender moment before picking up the hacksaw and grasping one horn, after which you place it as close to his skull as possible and ask if he's absolutely certain)


CRONUS: Not like I got much choice. Quit hesitatin', it ain't helpin'.


(You apologize and ask if he's ready)


CRONUS: Ready as I'll ever be, I guess.

(You nod, and express your love before lamenting the fact that you cannot make this any easier for him)


CRONUS: I love you too, it's okay. It's gonna be fine. I wouldn't trust anyone but you with this. Let's just get it over with, sweetheart.

(You nod again before steadying yourself. Once you're sure of your alignment, you begin moving the saw; at first, CRONUS is able to grit his teeth and bear it despite the saw in his sensitive horn base, but it isn't long before you strike nerves and he cries out in serious pain)

CRONUS: Oh God, this hurts SO MUCH WORSE THAN I THOUGHT!

(Your heart breaks for him. You try to calm him back down, shooshing him. You want to get a clean cut on the first shot, but he doesn't calm at all)

CRONUS: I'm tryin', babe, but it fucking hurts! That part of my horn is really fucking sensitive, and you're cutting through it with a fucking saw!


(You promise to make this as quick as possible, but remind him that it will take longer if he struggles; CRONUS' facade is completely broken by this point, and he is no longer able to hold back his agonized screams, nor his pained and terrified sobbing. You feel terrible that he's in such pain, but it doesn't take much longer to get through the first horn, and you set the detached horn aside before kissing CRONUS on the forehead. The tiny shred of comfort he feels quickly dies upon the saw touching his other horn)

CRONUS: (dread rising within him again) Oh no. Oh God nononono! I can't-

(It pains you to go through with this, but you know it must be done. You apologize and get back to work despite CRONUS' pleas. He screams again, fear overwhelming him even before you strike nerves again. You're suddenly nervous about anyone hearing him sobbing and crying out for fear of authorities getting called, so you implore him to keep his voice down or gag himself with a spare towel)


CRONUS: (on edge, angry) Well, excuse the FUCK outta me! What the hell ever, gimme the towel.


(You oblige, and he bites down onto it. His outbursts continue and only get worse as you saw through nerves, but at least now the neighbours shouldn't hear. You quickly get through the second horn as CRONUS begins to tire despite the pain. 

You set the final horn down near the first before propping him against the wall, treating his wounds with the utmost care and attention. CRONUS settles down with your care as you shower him in affection during the process. Once you've disinfected the wounds, you grab an ice pack and a bottle of water from the cooler and a towel from the cabinet, then give him the water before holding pressure with the towel to stem the bleeding and the ice pack on top of that to try easing the pain. 

Holding him close as you both lean against the wall and he drinks his water, you stroke his hair with your free hand as he helps you keep pressure on his horns. What were once an awe-inspiring set of horns have been reduced to nearly-level-with-Cronus'-skull stumps, making him look slightly closer to human, but...)

CRONUS: Keep 'em outta my sight.


(You inquire as to what he's referring to; there's a number of things you wouldn't want to see right now if you were him)


CRONUS: My horns. I don't trust myself to not throw up and instantly regret this if I see them off of my head and lyin' around right now.

(You place his horns in the cooler, effectively hiding them)


CRONUS: ...I'm sorry, babe. For all the yellin'. I'm sorry I got mean to you. Sorry I made things harder with my fussin'. You were just doin' what you could. Just doin' what you had to do.


(You shake your head, insisting he doesn't have to apologize as you can't blame him for reacting how he did, and telling him it's okay)

CRONUS: ...Babe?

(You acknowledge him)


CRONUS: Do you...do you still love me?


(You reassure him that you do)

CRONUS: (sighs in relief) Thank fuck for that.

(You get his attention)


CRONUS: Huh?


(You tell him how brave you think he is, since you can't imagine how painful this must have been, and must still be)



CRONUS: Hey, kitten?


(You respond)


CRONUS: I don't think I wanna do the rest of the modifications today. I think I just...wanna take it easy.


(You agree, seeing how stressful this ordeal has been for you both, and admitting that you have no idea what you'd do with his fins)

CRONUS: Ugh. I don't even wanna think about it right now.


(Neither do you. You ask him how he's feeling)


CRONUS: My head's killin' me, not as bad as it was, though. And I'm tired. But I think it's from stress, not blood loss.

(You suggest he try to stay awake, just in case. You ask him to keep you updated on his condition)

CRONUS: Will do. Love you, babe.

(You return his sentiment. The two of you relax and show affection to each other; you care for him for the duration of his recovery)

[END SCRIPT]

[premayogan]

Great Leaders Share These 12 Daily Habits

One of the most popular Dilbert comic strips in the cartoon’s history begins with Dilbert’s boss relaying senior leadership’s explanation for the company’s low profits. In response to his boss, Dilbert asks incredulously, “So they’re saying that profits went up because of great leadership and down because of a weak economy?” To which Dilbert’s boss replies, “These meetings will go faster if you stop putting things in context.” Great leadership is indeed a difficult thing to pin down and understand. You know a great leader when you’re working for one, but even they can have a hard time explaining the specifics of what they do that makes their leadership so effective. Great leaders change us for the better. They see more in us than we see in ourselves, and they help us learn to see it too. They dream big and show us all the great things we can accomplish. Great leadership is dynamic; it melds a variety of unique skills into an integrated whole. Great leadership is also founded in good habits. What follows are the essential habits that exceptional leaders rely on every day. Give them a try and see where they take your leadership skills.

Effective communication

“The more elaborate our means of communication, the less we communicate.”—Joseph Priestley Communication is the real work of leadership. It’s a fundamental element of how leaders accomplish their goals each and every day. You simply can’t become a great leader until you are a great communicator. Great communicators inspire people. They create a connection with their followers that is real, emotional, and personal, regardless of any physical distance between them. Great communicators forge this connection through an understanding of people and an ability to speak directly to their needs.

Courage

“Courage is the first virtue that makes all other virtues possible.”—Aristotle People will wait to see if a leader is courageous before they’re willing to follow his or her lead. People need courage in their leaders. They need someone who can make difficult decisions and watch over the good of the group. They need a leader who will stay the course when things get tough. People are far more likely to show courage themselves when their leaders do the same. For the courageous leader, adversity is a welcome test. Like a blacksmith’s molding of a red-hot iron, adversity is a trial by fire that refines leaders and sharpens their game. Adversity emboldens courageous leaders and leaves them more committed to their strategic direction. Leaders who lack courage simply toe the company line. They follow the safest path—the path of least resistance—because they’d rather cover their backside than lead.

Adherence to the Golden Rule +1

“The way you see people is the way you treat them, and the way you treat them is what they become.”—Jon Wolfgang von Goethe The Golden Rule—treat others as you want to be treated—assumes that all people are the same. It assumes that, if you treat your followers the way you would want a leader to treat you, they’ll be happy. It ignores that people are motivated by vastly different things. One person loves public recognition, while another loathes being the center of attention. Great leaders don’t treat people how they themselves want to be treated. Instead, they take the Golden Rule a step further and treat each person as he or she would like to be treated. Great leaders learn what makes people tick, recognize their needs at the moment, and adapt their leadership style accordingly.

Self-Awareness

“It is absurd that a man should rule others, who cannot rule himself.”—Latin Proverb Contrary to what Dilbert might have us believe, leaders’ gaps in self-awareness are rarely due to deceitful, Machiavellian motives, or severe character deficits. In most cases, leaders—like everyone else—view themselves in a more favorable light than other people do. Self-awareness is the foundation of emotional intelligence, a skill that 90% of top performing leaders possess in abundance. Great leaders’ high self-awareness means they have a clear and accurate image not just of their leadership style, but also of their own strengths and weaknesses. They know where they shine and where they’re weak, and they have effective strategies for leaning into their strengths and compensating for their weaknesses.

Passion

“If you just work on stuff that you like and are passionate about, you don’t have to have a master plan with how things will play out.”—Mark Zuckerberg Passion and enthusiasm are contagious. So are boredom and apathy. No one wants to work for a boss that’s unexcited about his or her job or even one who’s just going through the motions. Great leaders are passionate about what they do, and they strive to share that passion with everyone around them.

Humility

“Humility is not thinking less of yourself, it’s thinking of yourself less.”—C.S. Lewis Great leaders are humble. They don’t allow their position of authority to make them feel that they are better than anyone else. As such, they don’t hesitate to jump in and do the dirty work when needed, and they won’t ask their followers to do anything they wouldn’t be willing to do themselves.

Generosity

“A good leader is a person who takes a little more than his share of the blame and a little less than his share of the credit.”—John Maxwell Great leaders are generous. They share credit and offer enthusiastic praise. They’re as committed to their followers’ success as they are to their own. They want to inspire all of their employees to achieve their personal best—not just because it will make the team more successful, but because they care about each person as an individual.

Infectiousness

“The very essence of leadership is that you have to have a vision. It’s got to be a vision you articulate clearly and forcefully on every occasion. You can’t blow an uncertain trumpet.”—Reverend Theodore Hesburgh Great leaders know that having a clear vision isn’t enough. You have to make that vision come alive so that your followers can see it just as clearly as you do. Great leaders do that by telling stories and painting verbal pictures so that everyone can understand not just where they’re going, but what it will look and feel like when they get there. This inspires others to internalize the vision and make it their own.

Authenticity

“Just be who you are and speak from your guts and heart—it’s all a man has.”—Hubert Humphrey Authenticity refers to being honest in all things—not just what you say and do, but who you are. When you’re authentic, your words and actions align with who you claim to be. Your followers shouldn’t be compelled to spend time trying to figure out if you have ulterior motives. Any time they spend doing so erodes their confidence in you and in their ability to execute. Leaders who are authentic are transparent and forthcoming. They aren’t perfect, but they earn people’s respect by walking their talk.

Approachability

“Management is like holding a dove in your hand. Squeeze too hard and you kill it, not hard enough and it flies away.”—Tommy Lasorda Great leaders make it clear that they welcome challenges, criticism, and viewpoints other than their own. They know that an environment where people are afraid to speak up, offer insight, and ask good questions is destined for failure. By ensuring that they are approachable, great leaders facilitate the flow of great ideas throughout the organization.

Accountability

“The ancient Romans had a tradition: Whenever one of their engineers constructed an arch, as the capstone was hoisted into place, the engineer assumed accountability for his work in the most profound way possible: He stood under the arch.”—Michael Armstrong Great leaders have their followers’ backs. They don’t try to shift blame, and they don’t avoid shame when they fail. They’re never afraid to say, “The buck stops here,” and they earn people’s trust by backing them up.

A sense of purpose

“You don’t lead by pointing and telling people some place to go. You lead by going to that place and making a case.”—Ken Kesey Whereas vision is a clear idea of where you’re going, a sense of purpose refers to an understanding of why you’re going there. People like to feel like they’re part of something bigger than themselves. Great leaders give people that feeling. Becoming a great leader doesn’t mean that you have to incorporate all of these traits at once. Focus on one or two at a time; each incremental improvement will make you more effective. It’s okay if you “act” some of these qualities at first. The more you practice, the more instinctive it will become, and the more you’ll internalize your new leadership style. Read the full article

[dbpmsnews]

Ignite Live MVP Blog : BRK3370 - Innovation of Microsoft Teams built on a foundation of quality

This session was all about proving how great tool Microsoft Teams has grown into. Christian Schacht and Ruchir Astavans really did a great job of demoing and showing the amazing fundaments that Video and Audio in Teams are running on. For more general information about the sessio...

"Ignite Live MVP Blog : BRK3370 - Innovation of Microsoft Teams built on a foundation of quality" by Anders Eide originally published September 28th 2018 in Microsoft Teams Events Blog articles

This session was all about proving how great tool Microsoft Teams has grown into. Christian Schacht and Ruchir Astavans really did a great job of demoing and showing the amazing fundaments that Video and Audio in Teams are running on. For more general information about the session, please visit https://myignite.techcommunity.microsoft.com/sessions/65527.

  Last thing first! After the session one of the attendees approached me and said

  “Please let them know that before I entered this session, I was very skeptical to this whole Skype to Teams transmission, but this session really changed my mind. Thanks!”

  With that, let’s dive into this session blog!

  The key enabler is Microsoft’s Global Network, which now is one of the top two global networks. That doesn’t mean that they are the second, but you know how it is in the cloud. When two providers constantly complete about being best, you may just call the battle even…

Microsoft Global Network foot printThere is two key values is the global foot print and that it has been optimized for media.

Key values from Microsoft Global Network

In addition to this, the number of ports being used for enabling Voice and Video has been reduced and instead of using SIP, the service now communicates against REST endpoints.

The rules to try keeping the routes short is still some of the most important parts of creating a great experience, and Microsoft has helped to make that possible by always opening the meeting as close to the attendees as possible. The figure below is an example of how the connection from Dublin looks like depending on what pool the meeting has been opened in.

Quality in Microsoft Global Network

To get most of this, make sure to reach out to your ISP and ask them for Microsoft Peering. To learn more, see https://peering.azurewebsites.net/Peering/Peering. This is where we really see how Microsoft’s Global Network plays a crucial part of its success.

Example of how peering uses Microsoft Global Network

When a new Teams call, or video meeting, is connected it does intelligent routing to the closest Microsoft peering point, and from there uses the global network from Microsoft instead of traversing over internet. This is a solution that would have been costly to get deployed on your own premises, and especially for smaller organizations, when using Skype for Business pools. The figure below shows how this works in real life and is also a good example of why you shouldn’t use your corporate proxy solution for Microsoft Teams traffic.

Shorten that internet connection as much as possible

 As you see from the picture above, the connection is first routed to the closest peering endpoint, and then the meeting is created in nearest data center.

The innovation

The figure below shows how it all builds on top of Microsoft Global Network, and the reality of Teams having been built cloud first, ensuring that every design decision is based on the idea and vision of always available, always evolving, and the end users need of being ubiquitous. 

How Teams is built on Global Network and born-in-Cloud

The session started with an explanation of the four pillars above, and showing the investments done.

High Quality Resilient AV

Modern Operations

Intelligent User Assistance

Actionable IT Insights

High Quality Resilient AV

High Quality Resilient AV is enabled through the born-in-cloud and is all about making the best quality possible for the user, regardless of the surroundings. It’s a set of intelligent monitoring and actions configured into the platform, both on the frontend and the backend. Some of these features will be mentioned when going through the Intelligent User Assistance.

One of the best improvements however is how the video stream now is handled. Before you would receive new reference frames more often, which is more likely to be experienced as freezing video when doing the call over unstable network. By using what they call long term reference frames, the Teams application can use them together with delta frames for a longer period, resulting in a way better video experience. Have a look at the video at [mm:ss] to see it in action.

Another great feature that has been built-in, is that teams will help you to switch from IP to PSTN call just with a single click. This is perfect when you for instance just have a couple of minutes left of the call, and for some reason loses network for a long time.

Intelligent User Assistance

Intelligent User Assistance is also heavily improved in Teams. Some of the features (se figure below) is well known from back in the day when we used Skype for Business, but the change is that they are more intelligent than ever before. One of my absolute favorites is that you now you don’t have to type that crazy digit conference PIN after clicking “Join by phone”. Maybe not that intelligent from a “Intelligent Cloud” perspective, but the engineer taking the task to implement it should definitively get a raise!

Some of the improvements in user interface

    Low speaker volume: How many calls haven’t started with someone in the chat complaining about not hearing anything, and the presenter get’s all the blame! Now teams will identify more client issues and gives the end user a polite notification that there is a potential issue with their speaker, and maybe it is time to unmute the speaker.

  Poor Network: Not completely new this either, but highly improved. First Teams will try to optimize the data stream for what it’s worth, but if the machine learning models still sense a bad connection, it asks the user to turn of video for now, and instead use the available network for voice. If all that fails, it even recommends the user to continue the call using PSTN, and frictionless transition the call.

  Echo suppression: Ever been in a call with Echo? That’s horrible, and now Teams has built-in identification of echo, and will do mitigation against it. For instance, notifying the user that are making this noise, and try to remove it from the stream.

  Device failure and switch: Ever experienced that your headset runs out of power, and you have pulled the plug of your headset by accident during a call? Before that would result in a call on hold, and you losing a lot of the conversation. Now, Teams can switch seamlessly into a new device, which normally would be your device built-in speakers and mic. So no more excuses about failing audio devices…

  Smart device selection: This is another great feature where Teams will identify the best available device for your call. So for example, if you are doing the call using built-in speakers and mic, and then docking your device, and a better device is detected (for example a USB headset), Teams would do a smooth switch over to that device, and continue the call there.

  Speak-while-muted: Ever heard anyone say “Arh! Sorry! Had forgotten to unmute and was talking to myself there for a minute!”. Well, now Teams will be able to detect that your mic is muted in the call and give you a notification if you start talking too much to yourself. That’s just prefect, at least for me!

  Noise reduction: Ever experienced talking with someone with a bad mic, while they work from a public place? It’s not good! This is something that Teams now can detect as background noise and filter away from the stream. It sounds almost like the active noise canceling feature you have in higher end headsets and are just amazing! Again, the intelligence comes from machine learning and AI, which will identify your voice, and removing the rest. It even can identify if you get away from your mic, and then boost the mic volume! Again, have a peak at the video to hear it for yourself!

  Background blur: removes everything else than you. For instance, when you are working from home, you can “hide” your messy room, or anything else that you don’t want to show.

  Consistent experience: The experience form using Teams will be similar on any device. This way its simpler for the end user to use all the different devices supporting Teams. Have a look at it a bit further down in this blog post, and try it out yourself on mobile, PC, Mac and web browser.

 Familiar experience across devices

Modern Operations

Modern Operations is how Microsoft product group does its development of Teams. By constantly monitoring how the platform is operating, and with a well adopted DevOps strategy, that can constantly improve the service and improving the parts that really matter. This way we as end users gets new bits faster.

By using microservice architecture to host the platform, and getting E2E metrics, the developer teams can take quick actions to any issues in the platform, and even on the end user side. Many of these metrics are also available for the IT admins, which you can read more about in next chapter. This, together with AB Testing and Machine Learning that automatically does a lot of the daily operations, Teams almost comes alive, giving us the best experience. For an example, have a look at the background noise feature in the video [mm:ss]

Built-in noise reduction! See the recording to experience

Actionable IT Insights

Actionable IT Insights is all about giving IT operations the best metrics possible to help guide users to use Microsoft Teams and mobile meetings the best way. Many users even only use video and voice from PC and mobile when not in the office, making them believe that the tool itself is the issue for why the experience is bad. By bringing these metrics out into the light and making them available for IT enables them to give the correct advice for their users. For example, don’t rely on your favorite coffee show network for the next meeting, or try to reduce the network load from other home devises when having the meeting with their team. Anther common issue is doing meetings with a laptop docked, where audio is coming from the screen, while mic is present below the lid on the other side of the desk…

Identify issues using Call Quality Dashboard

Microsoft Teams optimized devices

Microsoft Teams are also supported by a range of different devices, and for the optimal experience it’s highly recommended to get a device that is Teams certified. The figure below shows the range of what is available. Note that Cortana is not available for now but should be there soon. From the personal workplace you have when on the road, all the way into the office and your desk and finally into the meeting room. Teams again shows how it is built around the vision of creating the best collaboration experience possible.

For a good overview, have a look at https://office.com/teamdevices

Teams are available on a range of devices

    Summary of features

It’s all about keeping thing as smoot as possible, giving the end users a great experience. The many ways of connecting to a meeting using teams and the innovation from media technologies also shows that Microsoft takes the user feedback from the past seriously, and from there built an really great product in Teams.

The list bellow summarizes the key points form the session

Keep meetings going smoothly

Automatic roaming and reconnect

Fall back to audio-only or PSTN dial-in when network connection isn't reliable

Improved codec recovery tools – Forward Error Correction, Long Term Reference video frames

Automatically adapt video resolution to from 100kbps to up to 4Mbps

Smart selection of AV devices, robust device failure recovery, and dynamic device black list controlled from the cloud

Auto-muting and device alerts

Fast Setup

Join via web – Edge and Chrome

Frictionless PSTN dial-in from mobile

Anonymous join

Reduce call setup latency by using more efficient protocols

UDP-based signaling for better call setup time and resiliency

Improved bandwidth control to quickly reach optimal quality

Media Technology Innovation

Improved echo cancellation across all platforms

Talking-while-muted notification

Open space headphone noise reduction

Intelligent Background Blur

  Read Full Post

[yes-dal456]

12 Daily Habits Of Exceptional Leaders

One of the most popular Dilbert comic strips in the cartoon’s history begins with Dilbert’s boss relaying senior leadership’s explanation for the company’s low profits. In response to his boss, Dilbert asks incredulously, “So they’re saying that profits went up because of great leadership and down because of a weak economy?” To which Dilbert’s boss replies, “These meetings will go faster if you stop putting things in context.”

Great leadership is indeed a difficult thing to pin down and understand. You know a great leader when you’re working for one, but even they can have a hard time explaining the specifics of what they do that makes their leadership so effective.

Great leaders change us for the better. They see more in us than we see in ourselves, and they help us learn to see it too. They dream big and show us all the great things we can accomplish.

Great leadership is dynamic; it melds a variety of unique skills into an integrated whole. Great leadership is also founded in good habits. What follows are the essential habits that exceptional leaders rely on every day. Give them a try and see where they take your leadership skills.

1. Effective Communication

“The more elaborate our means of communication, the less we communicate.” —Joseph Priestley

Communication is the real work of leadership. It’s a fundamental element of how leaders accomplish their goals each and every day. You simply can’t become a great leader until you are a great communicator.

Great communicators inspire people. They listen. They create a connection with their followers that is real, emotional, and personal, regardless of any physical distance between them. Great communicators forge this connection through an understanding of people and an ability to speak directly to their needs.

2. Courage

“Courage is the first virtue that makes all other virtues possible.” —Aristotle

People will wait to see if a leader is courageous before they’re willing to follow his or her lead. People need courage in their leaders. They need someone who can make difficult decisions and watch over the good of the group. They need a leader who will stay the course when things get tough. People are far more likely to show courage themselves when their leaders do the same.

For the courageous leader adversity is a welcome test. Like a blacksmith’s molding of a red-hot iron, adversity is a trial by fire that refines leaders and sharpens their game. Adversity emboldens courageous leaders and leaves them more committed to their strategic direction.

Leaders who lack courage simply toe the company line. They follow the safest path—the path of least resistance—because they’d rather cover their backside than lead.

3. Adherence to the Golden Rule +1

“The way you see people is the way you treat them, and the way you treat them is what they become.” —Jon Wolfgang von Goethe

The Golden Rule – treat others as you want to be treated – assumes that all people are the same. It assumes that, if you treat your followers the way you would want a leader to treat you, they’ll be happy. It ignores that people are motivated by vastly different things. One person loves public recognition, while another loathes being the center of attention.

Great leaders don’t treat people how they themselves want to be treated. Instead, they take the Golden Rule a step further and treat each person as he or she would like to be treated. Great leaders learn what makes people tick, recognize their needs in the moment, and adapt their leadership style accordingly.

4. Self-Awareness

“It is absurd that a man should rule others, who cannot rule himself.” —Latin Proverb

Contrary to what Dilbert might have us believe, leaders’ gaps in self-awareness are rarely due to deceitful, Machiavellian motives, or severe character deficits. In most cases, leaders—like everyone else—view themselves in a more favorable light than other people do.

Self-awareness is the foundation of emotional intelligence, a skill that 90% of top performing leaders possess in abundance. Great leaders’ high self-awareness means they have a clear and accurate image not just of their leadership style, but also of their own strengths and weaknesses. They know where they shine and where they’re weak, and they have effective strategies for leaning into their strengths and compensating for their weaknesses.

5. Passion

“If you just work on stuff that you like and are passionate about, you don’t have to have a master plan with how things will play out.” —Mark Zuckerberg

Passion and enthusiasm are contagious. So are boredom and apathy. No one wants to work for a boss that’s unexcited about his or her job, or even one who’s just going through the motions. Great leaders are passionate about what they do, and they strive to share that passion with everyone around them.

6. Humility

“Humility is not thinking less of yourself, it’s thinking of yourself less.” —C.S. Lewis

Great leaders are humble. They don’t allow their position of authority to make them feel that they are better than anyone else. As such, they don’t hesitate to jump in and do the dirty work when needed, and they won’t ask their followers to do anything they wouldn’t be willing to do themselves.

7. Generosity

“A good leader is a person who takes a little more than his share of the blame and a little less than his share of the credit.” —John Maxwell

Great leaders are generous. They share credit and offer enthusiastic praise. They’re as committed to their followers’ success as they are to their own. They want to inspire all of their employees to achieve their personal best – not just because it will make the team more successful, but because they care about each person as an individual.

8. Infectiousness

“The very essence of leadership is that you have to have a vision. It’s got to be a vision you articulate clearly and forcefully on every occasion. You can’t blow an uncertain trumpet.” —Reverend Theodore Hesburgh

Great leaders know that having a clear vision isn’t enough. You have to make that vision come alive so that your followers can see it just as clearly as you do. Great leaders do that by telling stories and painting verbal pictures so that everyone can understand not just where they’re going, but what it will look and feel like when they get there. This inspires others to internalize the vision and make it their own.

9. Authenticity

“Just be who you are and speak from your guts and heart – it’s all a man has.” —Hubert Humphrey

Authenticity refers to being honest in all things – not just what you say and do, but who you are. When you’re authentic, your words and actions align with who you claim to be. Your followers shouldn’t be compelled to spend time trying to figure out if you have ulterior motives. Any time they spend doing so erodes their confidence in you and in their ability to execute.

Leaders who are authentic are transparent and forthcoming. They aren’t perfect, but they earn people’s respect by walking their talk.

10. Approachability

“Management is like holding a dove in your hand. Squeeze too hard and you kill it, not hard enough and it flies away.” —Tommy Lasorda

Great leaders make it clear that they welcome challenges, criticism, and viewpoints other than their own. They know that an environment where people are afraid to speak up, offer insight, and ask good questions is destined for failure. By ensuring that they are approachable, great leaders facilitate the flow of great ideas throughout the organization.

11. Accountability

“The ancient Romans had a tradition: Whenever one of their engineers constructed an arch, as the capstone was hoisted into place, the engineer assumed accountability for his work in the most profound way possible: He stood under the arch.” —Michael Armstrong

Great leaders have their followers’ backs. They don’t try to shift blame, and they don’t avoid shame when they fail. They’re never afraid to say, “The buck stops here,” and they earn people’s trust by backing them up.

12. A Sense Of Purpose

“You don’t lead by pointing and telling people some place to go. You lead by going to that place and making a case.” —Ken Kesey

Whereas vision is a clear idea of where you’re going, a sense of purpose refers to an understanding of why you’re going there. People like to feel like they’re part of something bigger than themselves. Great leaders give people that feeling.

Bringing It All Together

Becoming a great leader doesn’t mean that you have to incorporate all of these traits at once. Focus on one or two at a time; each incremental improvement will make you more effective. It’s okay if you “act” some of these qualities at first. The more you practice, the more instinctive it will become, and the more you’ll internalize your new leadership style.

Please share your thoughts on exceptional leadership in the comments section, as I learn just as much from you as you do from me.

Want to learn more from me? Check out my book, Emotional Intelligence 2.0.

-- This feed and its contents are the property of The Huffington Post, and use is subject to our terms. It may be used for personal consumption, but may not be distributed on a website.

from http://ift.tt/2qJpxTM from Blogger http://ift.tt/2qk4bf4

[imreviewblog]

12 Daily Habits Of Exceptional Leaders

One of the most popular Dilbert comic strips in the cartoon’s history begins with Dilbert’s boss relaying senior leadership’s explanation for the company’s low profits. In response to his boss, Dilbert asks incredulously, “So they’re saying that profits went up because of great leadership and down because of a weak economy?” To which Dilbert’s boss replies, “These meetings will go faster if you stop putting things in context.”

Great leadership is indeed a difficult thing to pin down and understand. You know a great leader when you’re working for one, but even they can have a hard time explaining the specifics of what they do that makes their leadership so effective.

Great leaders change us for the better. They see more in us than we see in ourselves, and they help us learn to see it too. They dream big and show us all the great things we can accomplish.

Great leadership is dynamic; it melds a variety of unique skills into an integrated whole. Great leadership is also founded in good habits. What follows are the essential habits that exceptional leaders rely on every day. Give them a try and see where they take your leadership skills.

1. Effective Communication

“The more elaborate our means of communication, the less we communicate.” —Joseph Priestley

Communication is the real work of leadership. It’s a fundamental element of how leaders accomplish their goals each and every day. You simply can’t become a great leader until you are a great communicator.

Great communicators inspire people. They listen. They create a connection with their followers that is real, emotional, and personal, regardless of any physical distance between them. Great communicators forge this connection through an understanding of people and an ability to speak directly to their needs.

2. Courage

“Courage is the first virtue that makes all other virtues possible.” —Aristotle

People will wait to see if a leader is courageous before they’re willing to follow his or her lead. People need courage in their leaders. They need someone who can make difficult decisions and watch over the good of the group. They need a leader who will stay the course when things get tough. People are far more likely to show courage themselves when their leaders do the same.

For the courageous leader adversity is a welcome test. Like a blacksmith’s molding of a red-hot iron, adversity is a trial by fire that refines leaders and sharpens their game. Adversity emboldens courageous leaders and leaves them more committed to their strategic direction.

Leaders who lack courage simply toe the company line. They follow the safest path—the path of least resistance—because they’d rather cover their backside than lead.

3. Adherence to the Golden Rule +1

“The way you see people is the way you treat them, and the way you treat them is what they become.” —Jon Wolfgang von Goethe

The Golden Rule – treat others as you want to be treated – assumes that all people are the same. It assumes that, if you treat your followers the way you would want a leader to treat you, they’ll be happy. It ignores that people are motivated by vastly different things. One person loves public recognition, while another loathes being the center of attention.

Great leaders don’t treat people how they themselves want to be treated. Instead, they take the Golden Rule a step further and treat each person as he or she would like to be treated. Great leaders learn what makes people tick, recognize their needs in the moment, and adapt their leadership style accordingly.

4. Self-Awareness

“It is absurd that a man should rule others, who cannot rule himself.” —Latin Proverb

Contrary to what Dilbert might have us believe, leaders’ gaps in self-awareness are rarely due to deceitful, Machiavellian motives, or severe character deficits. In most cases, leaders—like everyone else—view themselves in a more favorable light than other people do.

Self-awareness is the foundation of emotional intelligence, a skill that 90% of top performing leaders possess in abundance. Great leaders’ high self-awareness means they have a clear and accurate image not just of their leadership style, but also of their own strengths and weaknesses. They know where they shine and where they’re weak, and they have effective strategies for leaning into their strengths and compensating for their weaknesses.

5. Passion

“If you just work on stuff that you like and are passionate about, you don’t have to have a master plan with how things will play out.” —Mark Zuckerberg

Passion and enthusiasm are contagious. So are boredom and apathy. No one wants to work for a boss that’s unexcited about his or her job, or even one who’s just going through the motions. Great leaders are passionate about what they do, and they strive to share that passion with everyone around them.

6. Humility

“Humility is not thinking less of yourself, it’s thinking of yourself less.” —C.S. Lewis

Great leaders are humble. They don’t allow their position of authority to make them feel that they are better than anyone else. As such, they don’t hesitate to jump in and do the dirty work when needed, and they won’t ask their followers to do anything they wouldn’t be willing to do themselves.

7. Generosity

“A good leader is a person who takes a little more than his share of the blame and a little less than his share of the credit.” —John Maxwell

Great leaders are generous. They share credit and offer enthusiastic praise. They’re as committed to their followers’ success as they are to their own. They want to inspire all of their employees to achieve their personal best – not just because it will make the team more successful, but because they care about each person as an individual.

8. Infectiousness

“The very essence of leadership is that you have to have a vision. It’s got to be a vision you articulate clearly and forcefully on every occasion. You can’t blow an uncertain trumpet.” —Reverend Theodore Hesburgh

Great leaders know that having a clear vision isn’t enough. You have to make that vision come alive so that your followers can see it just as clearly as you do. Great leaders do that by telling stories and painting verbal pictures so that everyone can understand not just where they’re going, but what it will look and feel like when they get there. This inspires others to internalize the vision and make it their own.

9. Authenticity

“Just be who you are and speak from your guts and heart – it’s all a man has.” —Hubert Humphrey

Authenticity refers to being honest in all things – not just what you say and do, but who you are. When you’re authentic, your words and actions align with who you claim to be. Your followers shouldn’t be compelled to spend time trying to figure out if you have ulterior motives. Any time they spend doing so erodes their confidence in you and in their ability to execute.

Leaders who are authentic are transparent and forthcoming. They aren’t perfect, but they earn people’s respect by walking their talk.

10. Approachability

“Management is like holding a dove in your hand. Squeeze too hard and you kill it, not hard enough and it flies away.” —Tommy Lasorda

Great leaders make it clear that they welcome challenges, criticism, and viewpoints other than their own. They know that an environment where people are afraid to speak up, offer insight, and ask good questions is destined for failure. By ensuring that they are approachable, great leaders facilitate the flow of great ideas throughout the organization.

11. Accountability

“The ancient Romans had a tradition: Whenever one of their engineers constructed an arch, as the capstone was hoisted into place, the engineer assumed accountability for his work in the most profound way possible: He stood under the arch.” —Michael Armstrong

Great leaders have their followers’ backs. They don’t try to shift blame, and they don’t avoid shame when they fail. They’re never afraid to say, “The buck stops here,” and they earn people’s trust by backing them up.

12. A Sense Of Purpose

“You don’t lead by pointing and telling people some place to go. You lead by going to that place and making a case.” —Ken Kesey

Whereas vision is a clear idea of where you’re going, a sense of purpose refers to an understanding of why you’re going there. People like to feel like they’re part of something bigger than themselves. Great leaders give people that feeling.

Bringing It All Together

Becoming a great leader doesn’t mean that you have to incorporate all of these traits at once. Focus on one or two at a time; each incremental improvement will make you more effective. It’s okay if you “act” some of these qualities at first. The more you practice, the more instinctive it will become, and the more you’ll internalize your new leadership style.

Please share your thoughts on exceptional leadership in the comments section, as I learn just as much from you as you do from me.

Want to learn more from me? Check out my book, Emotional Intelligence 2.0.

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