#(i genuinely cant tell if this is supposed to be silly or if you are asking this as a serious question. sorry anon...)

[catgirlstalin]

how are you stalin and have pronounce?

sometimes people receive she/her pronouns posthumously. as a symbol of honor so to speak.

[the-acid-pear]

Mental illness is insane I'm just having dinner w my father eating this a little too spicy pasta enjoying the Yeowch on my throat and the silence and suddenly I'm like yeah I'd kill myself.

[daisymbin]

- [ ] What about a Dino x reader in reference to when Dino says “they [his hyungs] take away his hope? The hyungs somehow managed to convince Dino that reader broke up with him as a prank. Maybe by removing every trace of her in his room and when he tries to contact her it won’t go through? But have it end on a happy ending, maybe where reader comes back to the dorm to find Dino crying like a baby and reassures him this is a prank

oops, all love! - lee chan

warnings: none! just the boys pranking our baby dino!

pairings: lee chan x reader

genre: not so silly pranks

wc: 1.2k

a/n: thank you for this req! I genuinely enjoyed writing this, such an interesting idea, I didn't think of it haha, hope you enjoyed it! 🥰

check out my masterlist! // chan's m.list

“chan-ah, what did you do this time?” jeonghan's faux worried voice rang in chan's ears from behind. vernon side eyes jeonghan because even he thinks this is, in his words, “going too far, you know how obsessed chan is with her, he's going to freak out.” jeonghan can only secretly smirk behind chan's back as he tries to stifle his bubbling laugh, he can only imagine chan’s face right now.

“hyung…I didn't do anything…was the dinner I made last night not to her liking? did I forget to clean the house? but the house is spotless-”

“yeah, spotless like how there's not a trace of her in here.” this time, jeonghan couldn't hide his laugh, which only cause chan to whip his head around in anger.

“seriously? you're choosing to laugh now?”

vernon lightly tugs at the back of jeonghan's shirt, hoping this would somehow hint at jeonghan to reel it back and ease on the teasing. it was a prank afterall, not that chan is aware of course. jeonghan cleared his throat, trying to keep his composure calm, “how about you try calling her? it's better to talk it out with her than to assume the worst. maybe she went on a sudden trip to her parent's or something.”

“where's my phone?” chan asked hurriedly in a panicked voice. he could only hope you'd pick up as soon as the phone rang. “I think you left it with soonyoung earlier. he's in the living room.” jeonghan said calmly, he watched as chan left the bedroom in hurried steps before he turned his head to vernon, laughing, “this prank is going so much better than expected, I think we underestimated his love for her.”

“why is it not going through?” chan whisper-shouted as the panic started to bubble tenfold now. he tried again, dialing your number, but all he got was the same frustrating sound. the line was dead. he could feel his heart racing, anxiety coursing through his blood like ice water.

“hyung!” he called out, his eyes glassy with tears threatening to spill, his face pale yet red. “i can't get through! it's..it's not working, why is it not working?!”

unbeknownst to chan, soonyoung had changed your contact number to his own number & then proceeded to block chan, making sure none of his texts or calls went through.

joshua who was loving how this prank was unfolding way too much added, “or maybe she finally broke up with you?” he knew how hard this would hit chan, the boys has been telling chan jokingly, teasingly, lovingly, how you're way too good for him, that they cant understand why you would pick him out of all people.

“shut up!” chan shot back, panic turning into frustration. he could feel his heart drop. “you guys can’t seriously be doing this! not to me! why would you even say that!”

“you’ll never know unless you ask her,” jeonghan replied, still teasing, somehow trying to rile him up even more.

“how am i supposed to do that if i can’t even call her?!” chan threw his phone onto the couch, his emotions bubbling to the surface, the tears finally freefalling.

“calm down,” vernon chimed in. “just wait for her to come home. maybe she went out or something.” what a party-pooper joshua thought.

but as the minutes passed, chan’s anxiety only grew. he couldn’t shake the feeling that something was wrong.

finally, 45 minutes into the ordeal, the door swung open, and you stepped into the apartment, your arms full of grocery bags. but the sight that greeted you stopped you in your tracks: chan was sitting on the floor, surrounded by his hyungs, who were pretending to comfort him, but their faces betrayed their amusement which only added to your confusion.

“chan?” you called out, dropping the grocery bags as you rushed towards him.

he looked up, his eyes red and puffy from crying, his face etched with despair. “oh god….i thought you left me! i thought… i thought….!” he sputtered, tears streaming down his cheeks.

“what’s going on?” you demanded, your heart racing as you glanced at the boys, who were trying their hardest to stifle their laughter.

“please dont leave me..just tell me what i did wrong and i'll change!” chan cried, looking genuinely heartbroken. “whatever i did wrong or said wrong, if i hurt you….i didn’t mean it! please don’t leave me! i’ll do better! i promise!”

your heart sank at the sight of him so broken, confusion flooding your mind. “what are you talking about? i just got home! i didn’t break up with you!”

the boys exchanged glances, their grins barely concealed as they continued to pretend to console chan.

“chan, please don’t cry! it’s okay!” seungkwan chimed in, putting a hand on his shoulder, but it only made chan wail louder, he seemingly did not hear your words as he continued, “i’m begging you! don’t leave me!” he cried, his voice cracking as he fell to his knees, hands clutching both your ankles as he desperately looks up at you. “i’m so sorry! i’ll fix everything! just give me another chance!”

“chan, what are you talking about?!” you repeated, kneeling down to face him, your heart breaking at his display of emotion. your hands come up to cup his face tenderly as your thumbs work to wipe his tears away. his blur vision turning clearer.

just then, soonyoung could no longer hold back his laughter and burst out, “we’re just messing with you! she didn’t break up with you!”

the room erupted into laughter as chan suddenly halts his crying as he muttered “wait… what?” he looks at you bewildered, but you were already looking at the boys and then back at chan, who was still on his knees, now wearing a confused and shock expression, though the relief on his face was clear.

“we thought it would be funny to see how far you’d freak out!” jeonghan added, unable to contain his amusement, “we really did underestimate your love for her.”

chan blinked at you, then at the boys, his face a mixture of confusion and disbelief. “so… this was all a prank?” he said slowly, still trying to process what just happened as he hands still stayed wrapped around your ankles firmly.

you couldn’t help but laugh even though your heart swelled at how much chan cared for having you in his life, finally seeing the humor in the situation. “chan-ah, i’m not going anywhere. stop crying, hm?” you said, your lips find his forehead as you continued wiping his tears away. seeing his crying slowly coming to an end, you leaned in and pressed a soft kiss to his lips, chan finally let out a shaky laugh, relief flooding his features. “you guys are the worst, truly taking my hope away from me…” he muttered, shaking his head as he pulled you into a tight embrace.

“maybe next time, don’t take it so seriously,” vernon teased, and you rolled your eyes at the boys, knowing this wouldn’t be the last of their antics.

[icarusredwings]

I love how you write call girl Wade and having her as gender fluid, honestly I live for a gender ambiguous take on him, it scratches the brain PERFECTLY

And Logan would be obsessed

Just constantly having Wade in his lap, not letting her get more than an arms reach away unless absolutely necessary for their little scams

Girl why you always in my inbox as anonymous.

Were friends. How am I supposed to tag you in cool posts if I dont know who you are.

I do like genderfluid wade and ive been messing around with them for a bit. Wade is literally the "I think im gender fluid but theres a gunfight going on 24/7 so idc about that rn"

So if logan were to genuinely ask, gently bring it up, Hed probably joke at first like wym haha im not a girl and logan would just blink and be like "Just be who you want to be" and suddenly- He's at a dress shop, sitting outside the dressing room awkwardly making eyecontact with the employees who walk by to see him holding 18 different dresses.

"Sir you cant smoke in here"

"You want me to put it out on your forehead?"

When wade comes out theyre in this really pretty kind of pinup dress. "What do you think!?"

Logan sighs, puts it out on his boot and smiles fondly. "Well arnt you gonna spin around?"

So he does and then giggles. "It has pockets!"

So he looks up to the clerk like "What other colours you have of that?"

Wanda has all sorts of dresses now but her signature for gamble nights is a short sparkly one almost similar to sabrina carpenters and a garter with prada heels.

Even pearls. Real pearls to match what ever colour suit logan is wearing. A small "dibs" on her at all times.

By definition Call girl means a sex worker who works by appointment only rather then standing the streets or working for a "any time" brothel.

Sometimes tables get suspicious.

"Whos the girl?"

"Ahh nutin. Just a call girl."

"You pay'er to walk around witcha or smth?"

"Something like that. I play better if I have someone pretty to look at instead of ya ugly mugs."

Pretty much, anyone who makes an appointment dies. Mainly because thats her profession. To butter up her targets, take'em home and then takem out in body bags. Since call girls are "higher class" then regular prostitutes they often have protection with cartel or mafia, especially in this particular setting.

So yeah, sometimes Logan has to grit his teeth and play pimp. "Sell" Wanda off to a sorry sap but it makes him so happy to know she just comes back home and fucks him silly to soothe his jealousy. Its a rush lifestyle. Always on the go, always having the adrenaline of winning or the endorphins of flirting, leading them on, the relief that rushes down wandas back when she finally gets to kill them.

Its a great little scheme they have going on here but sometimes theres more trouble then they bargin for or sometimes one of the players will call wanda ugly and it sets Logan off and sends wade into a hysterical session of tears and refusing to let anyone see them for awhile without any make up on. It pisses patch off a lot actually because he works hard to make sure she feels pretty at all times, even telling her how pretty she is while holding her hair back and their head in the toilet. Cancer is not any kinder to them in this au but at the end of the day if Wanda can make everyone in this room want a piece of his ass while said ass is sitting on Patches lap? Theyre happy.

[suneeater]

the haikyuu guys + their icks

➳ushijima, oikawa, iwaizumi, daichi, asahi, sugawara, hinata, kageyama, semi, bokuto, kenma, kuroo, shirabu, terushima, tsukkishima, tanaka, nishinoya

✎a/n: this is supposed to be silly, we need things to post until we get some requests rolling in and this was fun to write so!

✰warnings: n/a

𝐮𝐬𝐡𝐢𝐣𝐢𝐦𝐚.

he is completely socially unaware and cannot tell when people are flirting with him so he just lets it continue and accidentally leads people on, REGULARLY

𝐨𝐢𝐤𝐚𝐰𝐚.

he still follows instagram models and regularly likes all of their photos. he also responds with "why" when someone asks if he's single instead of just saying no

𝐢𝐰𝐚𝐢𝐳𝐮𝐦𝐢.

he has a man complex. im obsessed with this man but he is rude to strangers in public bc he thinks you'll think it's hot when really he's just embarrassing you. he also manspreads severely.

𝐝𝐚𝐢𝐜𝐡𝐢.

he has a weird amount of back hair which isn't a problem itself because it's just the human body except he tries to shave it by himself so now his back is just weird uneven patches of hair and he insists he doesn't need help. he also mansplains really bad

𝐬𝐮𝐠𝐚𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐚.

gives unprovoked and backhanded compliments all the time for literally no reason, also uses large amounts of your nice soaps

𝐚𝐬𝐚𝐡𝐢.

i genuinely cant think of any icks for him i love him so much he's perfect sorry. his ick is that he cannot make a mistake ever

𝐤𝐚𝐠𝐞𝐲𝐚𝐦𝐚.

he moans like a fucking blobfish. he also always has a tummy ache because he's a grown man who consumes too much dairy, and he gets indigestion and is always BURPING. watches family guy at full volume and cackles at it

𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐚𝐭𝐚.

can only fall asleep if bluey is on

𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐮𝐬𝐡𝐢𝐦𝐚.

he leads you on and then rejects you, then after a few months hits you up again acting like nothing happened

𝐬𝐡𝐢𝐫𝐚𝐛𝐮.

constantly tells people 'actually, that's DR to you'

𝐭𝐬𝐮𝐤𝐤𝐢𝐬𝐡𝐢𝐦𝐚.

he talks down to you like a child sometimes and insists on doing tasks for you not out of the goodness of his heart but because he's convinced you'll do it wrong by his standards

𝐭𝐚𝐧𝐚𝐤𝐚.

he only listens to rap music and thinks you don't know who tupac is. every gift he gets you is stolen from the dollar store

𝐧𝐢𝐬𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐨𝐲𝐚.

does the 'he ain't got no money' hold

𝐤𝐮𝐫𝐨𝐨.

he captions all of his instagram posts with emo quotes because it's not a phase, y/n. it could literally be your wedding photos and it would say 'ILL BURN YOUR NAME INTO MY THROAT I'LL BE THE FIRE THAT WILL CATCH YOU' and just ruin everything

𝐛𝐨𝐤𝐮𝐭𝐨.

he has skid marks lol, he at least has no personality icks if that helps. idk this one's pretty bad but at least it can be fixed. he'd sob if you brought it to his attention though

𝐤𝐞𝐧𝐦𝐚.

he does not regularly shower and it's noticeable. he also stockpiles dirty dishes, like deadass never brings them back to the kitchen. he'd also just throw the rest of his food away instead of putting it up because 'he doesn't like leftovers'

𝐬𝐞𝐦𝐢.

throws basement shows at his grandmas house and doesn't stop if there's a fight in the audience

[mediocre-noodle]

recent reblog: tell about q!slime 👀 (i havent watched qsmp but i know crumbs)

HAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHA yippee!! im very bad at character analysis and articulating my words but its ok i got this

1. feelings: ohhhhhhhh my god. he literally has been my favorite character of all time for the past year or so? i cant get him out of my brain 😭 i think hes such an incredibly tragic character that deserved so much better than the shitty hand he was dealt :( i feel ill about this freaking guy.

2. romantic pairings: main romantic ship is definitely him and mariana! at first they were the definition of a toxic, loveless marriage (still pretty much are LMAO) but i think, especially after their conversation in purgatory, they were genuinely really good together. like, them joking around and being really sweet was so, like, augghhhh 😭😭😭 but like. the toxic marriage was so fucking funny to watch 😭 i laughed so hard i started crying during the trial of juanaflippa LMAOO

2.5: another romantic pairing is him and cellbit because. dude. their conversation during the dia de los muertos stream was SOOOOOOOOOOO omg. it lives in my head rent free 😭 i think they would only serve to make each other SO MUCH WORSE and i am here for it (yeah cellbit is married but like. slime had a mega crush on that man theres no denying it, and me personally i think their relationship (romantic or not) is SOOOOOO fascinating, especially during slime’s code arc)

3. non-romantic otp: slime and baghera!!!!!! they are the definition of friendship soulmates to me LMAO. baghera trying so hard to be there for him even when NO ONE ELSE WAS and the infection was getting so bad……. ough……! but also, their funny moments are EVERYTHINGGGG to me. the fish joke and the karaoke and all their silly little conversations… gah…….. AND PURGATORYYYYY!!! i cant articulate thoughts about them beyond OOOOGH🥰🥰🥰❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️😍😍😍 (platonic)

4. unpopular opinion: idk how unpopular this is but like. i wish purgatory never happened 😭 like it was SO MUCH FUN while it lasted, but the overall impact it had, especially on qslime, was DEFINITELY not worth it lmao. like, it completely shoved all of his lore and buildup out of the way in favor of the event, and then????? he wasnt ever told to log back on???????? (context xi: the admins on the qsmp handled a lot of lore for the players, and slime’s lore really started to pick up just before the purgatory event. when the event was over, multiple players were told to not log on for “lore”, but slime and one other guy (pol) were never let back onto the server 😭 like, they straight up forgot about him even though he was SUPPOSED to have made it out of purgatory) i dont really have much more to that. bolas was fun, wasnt worth my cubito never getting anymore lore tho

5. something i wish happened: i wish we got an ending… or closure……… or something………

because!!!!! like!!!!!!! his story was going SO WELL (in a pacing and interest sense, the character was SUFFERING lmao) and it was really coming together!!! the pacing and buildup were AMAZING and it really looked like it was going to reach its peak after purgatory!! but, alas. he was forgotten. and so was his lore. because we NEVER saw codeflippa again. or him. or his code infection. and im never going to be over it.

i really need to go back and rewatch the streams to brush up on my qslime brain but. yeah!! thank you for indulging me :333 (if any of this was confusing or smth lemme know and i can clear it up!!)

[bulbabutt]

listen im not trying to be a hater i just think tf prime represents something of the moment in time it was made and i dislike it a lot. it clearly is trying to be like the bad movies, stylistically and character wise. it loses its own identity in trying to make a cartoon out of that concept, because it cant.

its full of so many words that it tries to give meaning to, all being names or objects from previous shows, even using song lyrics from the 86 movie, while its central conflict becomes about politics it barely understands. trying to make me care if the decepticons or autobots press the magic button that will restore their home planet because whoever does so will have a POLITICAL edge when the other cybertronians return home (they never do)

it barely grasps what the source of the war was. what starts as revolution against an oppressing class became a war between two guys with differing beliefs on how to achieve justice. but when the difference in their politics is literally 'i will get justice even if it resorts to violence' vs 'i dont believe in violence' and then you HAVE A WAR SO BAD IT CAUSES YOUR PLANET TO DIE you need to grapple with the consequences of that. the characters should bring that up. the vibes between optimus and megatron should be more familiar than they are. like a magneto and professor x thing, a former brotherhood turned sour, but knowing each other better than anyone despite their opposing views.

(rambled on for a while so cut)

in other shows we're left wondering what the history is, seeing these two titans who have been fighting for millions of years, we rarely see any specifics and so we're left to make our own conclusion based on the relationship we see. here its more about making the lore heavy than it is about how the characters back story relate to how they act.

to get into how the characters as a whole interact it seems less interested in making characters seem like real people than the g1 cartoon, which by all accounts was just a silly toy commercial. there is no sense of brotherhood among the autobots and no real love for earths living creatures outside of these 3 children (and the us government). none of the autobots feel like characters, they have no real personality or individual quirks (besides ratchet) and optimus most of all feels like he is just here to stand in the corner of a scene and give a good soundbite line. something vague that somewhat relates to whats being said, it feels like 'well we have peter cullen lets let him say something cool'. style over substance.

meanwhile the decepticons despite being so bloodthirsty and brutal, constantly forget and forgive each other for literally attempting to kill each other every episode. in one episode megatron tells starscream if he doesnt find him worthy of rejoining the decepticons that he will kill him. then we see him watch all of starscreams betrayals from over the course of the entire show, we see no reason he should ever forgive starscream and then at the end he simply.... doesnt kill him. he forgives him and keeps him around. this is supposed to be the scary bloodthirsty megatron who was a gladiator and has no problem with violence, yet he lets the character who stole victory after victory from him live. it makes no sense in this 'the more serious show'. but then it works out cuz starscream just stops being who he was and then just genuinely follows megatron. so. idk i guess the goal was scare him. thats the end of that whole plotline then.

starscream specifically seems too goofy here because he constantly fails at everything. theres a part of how you make this character work thats fully missing here, and thats his sense of self preservation. he doesnt have one. he makes decisions that make no sense, he betrays everyone and walks into traps set by them despite knowing they want him dead just to make him as pathetic as possible. when he loses his t cog its especially apparent because he just. went to the guys that wanted a t cog after destroying bumblebees and hes like "whoopsie oh well" and then is surprised they turn on him and take his. comparing this to the g1 version and saying 'this one makes more sense' kills me. it doesnt. g1 knows when to fold. thats why it feels like knockout feels more like starscream to me, hes the only one calculating and staying quiet until he sees the power shift.

the show is frustrating to watch because it just seems like characters waiting around doing nothing but reacting to things, but in the meantime theyre not really being characters at all, theyre not being enjoyable or lovable to watch outside of their names reminding you 'they are iconic IP, please buy these toys.'

and they dont look very good either, clearly trying to mesh together the overly complicated ugly mess that is the b*yverse with cartoon proportions. specifically anyone designed in that first 5 episode. the designs are all top heavy, their faces so flat mouths so plain, but everyone has these very detailed eyebrows to emote with. in arcees case she even gets detailed eyelashes.

and dont get me started on the 'arcee cant be pink cuz thats a girl colour and shes a girl but shes not a GIRL' problem. you put pink on her as her secondary colour. you put pink IN HER EYES. she has a skirt. she shows off an insane amount of robot midriff (somehow, cuz they painted her like that) her flat face for some reason has lips (which dont even look good, like warped metal around her mouth). so are you trying to design a girl character or not? be fucking honest about it. youre both embarrassed of pink arcee while also doing the same thing, making her small making her clearly the feminine one. and narratively ohhhh dont get me started (also this show decided to keep saying two wheeler in a way that meant girl and thats......ugh)

basically i just think when you try so hard to be so serious you end up being sillier than things that know theyre silly. if youre embarrassed of the media that came before you why even make it?

oh right. brand synergy. to advertise your new streaming network. to show off what cartoons can REALLY be like now. SUPER SERIOUS. SUPER CINEMATIC.

but i think it just didnt say anything about anything. it didnt represent anything. didnt make me care about anyone or any plight. any stakes it tried to add didnt matter. didnt do anything new, didnt really understand anything that came before. threw out ideas stolen from better shows. threw a new paintjob on hotrod, called him smokescreen, but then didnt have the balls to kill off optimus to make that character matter. kinda represents a lot of what i mean just in that regard alone.

i just think ive seen a lot of these shows now and this one has made me the most mad, cuz it is so 2010, its so cynical and mean spirited, its so lazy and cash grabby, its full of in name only references to make you point at the screen and go I KNOW THAT THING! without knowing why you ever cared about that thing.

and while im not trying to say its the worst one objectively (i dont rank shit like that) i am saying at least when it comes to something the masses would consider a 'worse show' like energon or bm or rid, at least all of those have their own identity and theyre not pretending to be something theyre not. theyre not trying to be cleverer than they are.

basically the people who wrote this are the people that wrote the first transformers movie, and that is where this plague of creating soulless reboot/remake/sequels to your favorite nostalgic media that hollywood has been stuck in ever since started, and you can TELL.

[diagonal-queen]

thungo thursday pt2

ep 6 (put it under a cut because this one is LONG)

fukuchi be like 'the agency couldn't possibly be smart enough to- oh wait nvm i forgot ranpo existed lol' like more than once and i think that is testament to the fact that RANPO BEST BOY

'have you forgotten? we're terrorists' ICONIC BEHAVIOUR

man and i complain about doing one 37 hour work week. after this one week the agency needs to take a NAP. AND THE MAFIA TOO. imagine there's like just no criminal activity or anything for like three days and everyone's like ?? but on day 4 atsushi and akutagawa are fighting to the death at the port and everyone is like 'ah. business as usual' lmaoooo

omg every time the hunting dogs song comes on i get so hyped lmao im like yESSS ACTION

'that man, that demon, the evillest most scawy man ever in the world....etc etc' and its just some guy doing the most coy babygirl pose a guy can possibly do

wait DAZAI WHAT DID YOU DO. HOW DID YOU DO IT

taneda btw deserved none of this he was just some nice old dude and then sigma fucking stabbed him lmao

dazai is like the personification of the perjury mechanic in drv3. 'go on lie. you gotta. lie now. cmon pussy you wont'

OH MY GOD CHUUYA

my god fyozai is so fucking babygirl. also wdym dazai?? if the two of you were the last ones on earth you should just have gay sex. its not that hard smh

oh no dazai falled down through the flore

OH MY GOD MYKOLA AND SIGMA

BESTIE??

BESTIE?????

BESTIE????????????????

BESTIE??????????????????????

B

E

S

T

I

E

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dm me if you want to receive a free 2min audio file of me laughing about this (i have a headache from laughing. my throat fucking hurts so bad. i'm pretty sure it's actually bleeding. my eyes are moist with tears. BESTIE???????)

do you even needa ask why i'm here?? ⭐️❤️☺️ *voice drops 6 octaves* i'm here to murder you 👹👹👹

and then after that fyodor was just like 'teehee he's so romantic x' like bro

dazai: *turns to the camera like he's on the office* waow

i love mykola's little laugh it's so silley

omg they're actually animating him so well. bones must've seen the reception from s4 and decided to step it up 💀

dazai and fyodor are simultaneously evil grown men and bimbo highschool girls and it's such a look. 'omg ur friends are so cute <3' 'omg right???' also mykola my beloved i want to be yours forever pls

i love how bram's acting all tough like aya can't just open the casket and leave and render him thoroughly powerless lmao

omg the official anime aya and bram sillies begin. we've been waiting for this for months folks so far so good

it was already pretty funny that aya is carrying bram like a backpack but actually seeing her running with him on her back is like a billion times funnier especially since this shit is life or death. but she just got a whole entire vampire on her back no problem sjhsksjssjhj

sigma: watashi wa shiguma me: fucking superb you funky little toddler

imagine if it was a fucking prank this whole time and mykola just injected them with a slow-working sedative or something that would be so funny. like all of this for nothing sksjksjsjks and then he just stabs fyodor or something the end. boom world save

oh ok nvm the vampires can talk just fine i guess lmao. also i genuinely cant tell if im supposed to be taking this episode seriously or not. one second people are being brutally slaughtered next moment silley little guys??? such is the way of bsd i guess

'you're a failure of a woman' my dude she is literally 10 years old she is nowhere close to being a woman shut your misogynistic ass up lmao

OKAY BECAUSE ok ok listen i was wondering what music they were gonna use for bram and when i heard the ending music i was like 'ok a little anticlimactic but i understand' and then it TRANSITIONED into the ACTUAL ENDING??? 10/10

hehe. bestie

[tuxedokit]

senior agents polycule. sasha milla morceau. please

the :)

when i started shipping it, if i did:

my thoughts:

chaos trio chaos trio my first instinct is to say milla is the braincell or the responsible one but wouldnt it be so much funnier if tlnone of them were. wouldnt it be funny if milla is the braincell at camp, with the kids, cause oleander is oleander and sasha wants to experiment,, but sasha had to be the responsible one at work on slow days, and oleander and milla keep trying to crack him up because cmonnnnnn sasha nothing's going on,,,, and oleander had to be the one to snap sasha and milla back into focus cause they were chatting in the jet and "guys we landed five minutes ago".... wouldnt it be great?

what makes me happy about them:

their dynamic of chaos. their friendship. theyre so silly you Know they tell stories about the camp kids to each other cause kids say the darndest things.

what makes me sad about them:

oleander probably feels like a third wheel sometimes

things done in fanfic that annoy me:

i havent read fanfic, but if any one of them get sidelined im going to kill everyone in this room and then myself /ref

things i look for in fanfic:

shenanigans. give. me. shenanigans.

who i'd be comfortable with them ending up with, if not each other:

oleander can hold hands with loboto. as a treat <3

my happily ever after for them:

going down together in a blaze of glory. i genuinely cant imagine it ending any other way

big spoon/little spoon:

oleander is the little spoon i think. sasha and milla take turns being on the outside or in the middle.

favourite activity:

fucking with each other, especially when theyre supposed to be doing paperwork. or going on missions together.

[bvshboy]

is anyone else bothered by the weird humorizing of serious songs? at this point if Closer comes up on my spotify, people literally laugh

and just to be clear I'm not trying to be the joke police here, it's totally chill to joke about songs (even serious and sad songs!), but there's a difference between joking about a subject and turning that subject into a joke

it might sound like a Nothing Problem but it seems to be part of a bigger trend of anti media literacy

every day I see people denouncing classic movies as if the association between Fight Club and annoying film bros at parties somehow means the movie itself isn't important or good

I see people mocking classic literature and translated literature for being boring and pretentious

I've been made fun of before for liking unpopular music because apparently it makes me a "hipster" who's "not like other kids"

and it seems to me like a lot of people who find themselves genuinely enjoying music made by artists who want you to take their art seriously feel the need to make their love of this art into a joke

genuine expression of emotion is out right now, it's too edgy and pretentious

being candid and poetic about how you feel is cringe, you're supposed to make a video of you doing something silly or telling a joke, then follow it up with an out of pocket trauma dump like "I wish my dad hadn't left" or "everyday is worse than the last" (I'm not saying there's anything wrong with the style of comedy but if I have to hear another song that's written like a tweet I'm going to run away and live in the woods)

this has happened to a lot of songs, but since I like NIN and it's a good example, we'll keep using Closer

Trent Reznor is a very talented writer, and if you listen to Closer, it is very clearly about feeling like everything in your life feels so bad that you need sex so that you can feel good

when it became The House Party/Toppless Club Song, Reznor was very upset about it

I AM NOT SAYING YOU CANT BE TURNED ON BY THE SONG I am also not saying you can't joke about it

but you don't have to strip everything emotional of it's meaning to make it less cringe! just let yourself feel cringy emotions it's fine!

[carpisuns]

For the artist meme -- 20 and 6! 🎨 if you like xx

20. how often do you get art block?

all the time 🥰 it's like clockwork lol sometimes i get sooo frustrated and cranky bc i hate all my art and i'm like "woe is me!! i've lost all my skills!! i'll never draw again!!" and then i'm like wait . i know what's happening here. i just gotta wait it out I'll be fine lol. it's nice that i also write bc then i can switch to writing for a while until the art block clears up 👍 i've found it's best for me to just take a break from drawing for a bit and not try to force it so my brain can like reset itself

6. tag your favorite artists/inspirations!

oh man there are so many!!!! i could name like 100 people lol but i'm gonna limit myself to the ones i think have had the most direct influence on my art style. hope u guys don't mind the tags<3

@ileniagennari was one of the first artists i latched onto stylewise. i used to study their work a lot because i am obsessed with the fluidity and softness of their linework and i just really like how they draw faces and bodies. their rendering is also amazing and feels sort of cinematic somehow? i've always wished my art could have a similar feel!

@anna-scribbles has also been a huge style influence for me and she's just also been a big inspiration in general as a close friend<3 i ADORE her work and have studied it specifically a ton. she draws the most blorby blorbos ever. blorbyness is her art trademark imo. and i want that for me too so i tried to steal it. i also think just sheer proximity to her and her art has made me pick up a lot of things from her automatically haha. in particular, i feel like the way she draws smiles is so perfect, and i always try to channel her when i draw smiles myself haha

@ladybeug inspires me so much and has taught me really valuable art skills! a while ago i came to a point in my art journey when i felt just really stuck and frustrated. like i could not for the life of me just DOODLE. i took everything too seriously, even if it was supposed to be simple and silly. i really needed to learn how to loosen up and enjoy drawing more. stephanie is like the most esteemed and delightful doodler i know so i came to her for advice and she DELIVERED. she gave me super helpful tips and invited me to make daily comics with her and it's been lifechanging! it's helped me focus on communication over perfection and feel more confident in my art, which i think had a visible difference in my style too. i learn SO much from just regularly enjoying stephanie's work, including her webcomic @datmcomic!!

@rileyclaw is a good buddy of mine and his work is so hugely inspiring to me! it's really educational to see his wips and learn from his process. and since he's an incredible animator as well as an illustrator, enjoying his work is part of what inspired me to finally take a leap and make my first animatic. i really love how he pushes/exaggerates body and facial expression to communicate emotion and how he makes such careful choices about comp and color and just Everything to tell a whole story with every piece of his art. i've learned a lot from riley on the storytelling aspects of art and that's something i continue to try to build on!

@knockknockknockingonhootysdoor's art is like an instant and intense shot of dopamine to my brain every time!!! i cant even tell you how HAPPY it makes me. i just stare at it and eat it all up and i'm always asking myself HOW does he do it?? how does he make me feel this way. and i think it's just like....how genuine it is?? i can just feel kryan's love for the story and characters in the way he draws and im not sure that is a stealable quality lol. but in particular something i really admire about his art is how SHAPE it is. i love how he builds each character with different shapes and how each design feels so unique and so fitting for them. i am trying to incorporate that more into my own art!

man i already have rambled so much and there are so many other artists i could go on and on about alskjdfjkla ok just real quick i have to shout out @picayunearts bc i intensely enjoy her work in both the ml and toh fandoms and her coloring and use of light and gradient always stands out to me so i kinda try to channel that sometimes! @smallpapers is another fav and i love how soft and simple her art feels! it's always inspiring to me. @raystel's work also inspires me a lot, whether it's fanwork or original stuff. she is so creative with character design and seeing the way she expresses her ideas in art is so cool!

and i would be remiss if i didn't shout out my sister @mozzys-studio who is the first person i came to when i wanted to learn how to draw and she taught me a lot! her art is beautiful<3

thanks for the questions! :D

artist asks

[aeaeaexxzd]

cant wait to do my master in television writing and producing next yr

Season 6 of The Walking Dead should’ve been the final season. For one, accuracy to the source material is not relevant because the televised remake was never intended to be from the very start. 

Secondly, there’s a reason they chose this black and white timeline system in the 6th season, remember that ? I don’t necessarily fuck with it but it’s a marker, it says something, so it doesn’t make any sense, stylistically, to go in that direction and then abandon it along the way, unless it had actual weight.

I’m aware of, and I understand the cultural impact that the character Negan had, it revived the show right after it would’ve been appropriate to end it. But I have a tendency to believe that if you can’t do something right with good intentions then you shouldn’t do it at all. Negan worked, he became even more iconic and marketable than Rick, and that’s all that mattered.

And in hindsight, I think that Negan’s storyline could’ve easily been told in the earlier seasons. He could have happened soon after the The Governors storyline or even replaced it completely, seeing as he wasn’t as much of a hit anyways. 

Commercially, ending a show like this after 6 or 7 seasons doesn’t work, we’re talking about money. And it’s when a story becomes solely about profit, that it truly dies, and that’s when watching a show like this becomes a chore for me. I’m not seeing quality, because I’m not seeing love for the story, for the characters, and for all the people who have to work on the project. 

The longer you make a show like The Walking Dead last, the more you risk ruining it. A lot of loyal viewers of audiences from many different shows can vouch for this about their favorite pieces of media. They’ll say “it got kinda bad towards the end” or “I stopped after x season”. I know for a fact that Glenn’s death on the show in season 7 lowered the viewership count significantly. Not to mention it’s release in 2016 was facing new competitors like Stranger Things, Lucifer, the Crown (Netflix), Westworld (HBO) and many more. It’s blatant the the show lost it’s relevancy. Nowadays it’s barely talked about, even less with the spectacular debut of the series adaptation of The Last of Us. People were craving a story like that, (survivalism, the apocalypse, love, found family) not because there hadn’t been one in a while, but because the one that already existed was failing. It’s easy to ruin a show. It’s easy to let things crumble and to make the wrong decisions. 

If you’re going to make a show last as long as 11 seasons, you have to do it right, and it has to be worth it. The audience matters. Fans and casual viewers alike give TV shows life and reputation. You can’t give them what they want, but you can’t punish them either. I genuinely don’t understand the choice behind this. People would have remembered The Walking Dead for what it was : an excellent apocalyptic, horror drama and thriller and ending the show at 6 seasons, or even 7 would not have hurt anyone, especially not the viewers.  

It seems that these days good stories are either cut short or prolonged until they are no longer so. There’s TV and there’s storytelling. You can have storytelling without TV but you can’t have TV without storytelling. And one of the main rules about telling a story is that it needs a good beginning just as much as it needs a good end. This is why you bring up Breaking Bad. This is why you bring up Avatar the Last Airbender. When a story ends where it’s supposed to you are left with good memories and accolades from everyone. It’s almost silly that a show about corpses walking around would end up one itself.

[haedgaf]

WOW WOW WOW WOW WOW WOW THIS WAS SUCH A CRAZY EXPERIENCE READING I ENJOYED IT WAAAAAAYYYY TOO MUUUCHHH. i normally don’t read jaehyun fics let alone LONG slow burn jaehyun fics but i just had to give this one a shot because it piqued my interest for a while and i’m so happy i did because why was this one of the best fics i’ve read in so long…

THE PLOT… this whole chef / restaurant / competition au is something i’ve never seen before and i wasn’t even sure if i was gonna like it but i enjoyed it WAY more than i expected i would wowie. this was such a nice piece of e2l and i LOVED how you could gradually notice the change in their relationship… jaehyun was such a dick at the start and the reader was clearly lacking confidence BECAUSE of him but slowly it was like a flip switched and everything just changed after that one day in the kitchen.. like jaehyun just became so down bad from that point on. like i just loved how he went from a cold dickhead to a cute silly softie.

LIKE SERIOUSLY JAEHYUN IS SO DOWN BAD NEAR THE END???? giggling and blushing like a freak can he stand up omg this is so embarrassing on him YOURE SUPPOSED TO BE A TOP CLASS CHEFF WHY YOU ON TV GIGGLING AND KICKING YOUR FEET LIKE A LITTLE GIRLSJDJD… even taeyong could tell he was down bad IM CRYINGGG 😭😭 but as he should tbh the reader was literally perfect!! like he said himself she basically completed him with the things he lacked. when they both could barely look at each other and would be shy messes like they’re actually so cute awww. i’m happy that they didn’t immediately jump into a relationship but took time to realise that they genuinely fell for one another and taeyong explaining to her how happy he is that jaehyun seems to wanna start dating again made me awww.

BACK TO THE PLOT IT WAS SO WELL DONE I CANT GET OVER IT… like from all their encounters to the competition it was all so perfect and all felt so realistic, i swear i thought i was on that stage for a second. i just rlly love how you can see their dynamic change over time.

also idk why i was taking my time reading that final winner part as if i couldn’t already guess who won 💀💀, my ass fr cheered when i read that she won as if that wasn’t expected, or that she was paired with jaehyun LIKE idk why i sat here acting shocked but it was funny and i loved how it felt like i was fr watching a competition cooking program.

i awed a lot and was giggling a lot i enjoyed this 10/10 fic i kinda need more fics of this e2l cheff rivals genre

FIVE PLUS ONE | JAEHYUN

SYNOPSIS. Five times world-renowned chef Jeong Jaehyun tried to end your journey to be a chef  because you weren’t ‘qualified enough to be a chef’ and that one time you proved him wrong. 

—or: your villain story quite literally 

PAIRING. jaehyun x fem!reader

GENRE. fluff | angst | enemies to lovers!au | chef!jaehyun | aspiring chef!reader

WORD COUNT. 28.8k+ words (is this my new record? omg)

author’s note. i posted a long time ago about how i must write a chef!jae fic and now, here she is. i’m so sorry for such a long wait (and all those postponements oop) but i’m glad that she’s finally done and posted for you to enjoy reading! i hope you enjoy this fic as much as i enjoyed writing it :-) also pls reading the author’s note at the end for all my thoughts about writing this fic! happy reading~

Keep reading

[ghost-of-the-machine]

ramble about my aromantic tendencies cuz im all. confused im SURE theres a word for this i just think im not ready??? i think like. not in a personal way, in a PHYSICAL way like something needs to change before id ever CONSIDER IT, makes me sick otherwise like theres so many things!! so many hurdles and stuff that would deter me from all that nonsense but i still like the idea of it like the idea is so sweet, its why i enjoy it so much in fiction but. in execution? IDK MAN.. freaks me out for so many reasons

romantic love is so cute bro like. its genuinely adorable to me, i love listening to love songs and just feeling the emotion and passion behind all the words, but ummmmmmm. i think realistically im capable? i just think that any attempt wouldnt go well, i dont think i can give someone what they might need, its always been like. okay 1. im going to be OBSESSED with you ill do anything you say ill let you mistreat and abuse me ill do anything for you okay which is not ideal!! not ideal, made for bad people dont want bad people. but?? on the other hand its also like i cant imagine loving another person more than i love my friends, but thats whats expected of me isnt it? i think they wouldnt like it very much if i had an equal amount but like. is it even possible? I REALLY DONT KNOW.. i know ive said it before, i just feel like. love, not platonic not romantic just LOVE pure unlabeled love. what kind of treatment would i give to a partner that i dont already give to my friends? itd go really wrong there im sure, i dont wanna hurt anybody yknow

idk its like such a cute little fantasy tho isnt it? maybe i meet someone and we become friends and then it leads to something more, is going on dates fun? maybe it would be but. i go on dates with my friends!!!!!! like is it different? i guess, but im out with someone i love i dont see how it could be much different

sometimes it feels like people like me dont get that. its hard to be good enough for someone else, like. i know theres like 8 billion people in the world but its always. im too fat im trans im not hot enough im too mentally ill im too awkward too. TOO EVERYTHING!! so on top of like. how can someone possible be more than what i already have, i have to be good enough too!!!!! so much work, i honestly. after brian, i was so content to just fall back on fictional characters, i know it sounds silly but self shipping LITERALLY saved my life i was hanging by a thread after him and then i found a coping mechanism that made me feel so good

i think its uncertainty, when it comes to fictional relationship? i make the rules, the scenarios, its perfect for me but. in real life you cant do that, im thrown in BLIND. i know its part of life, you learn and grow together but erm... im autistic please dont do this to me PLEASE if i plan out my conversation at a grocery store with the clerk and im STILL THROWN OFF... yeeowch!!

thats the thing im very offputting to other people like. something about me, i can see it in their eyes, see the way they kinda. like im. somethings all wrong with me!!!! they dont like it, i cant imagine myself being charming but.. maybe if i start T, ill be less. dreadfully anxious about seeing other people, then maybe ill flourish a little more. we'll see, it still freaks me out the thought of loving someone more than my friends like TO ME i dont think its possible and i dont want to find out about it okay it makes me sick it feels like betrayal, never tell me otherwise or ill feel awful, its betrayal to me!!!! cuz i want to give my friends the most i can give, they deserve it, so like. what, am i supposed to give less? give someone else more?? like ew who are you1!!! i dont need you i just need my besties thats all i need :] but its still a nice thought isnt it? its cute

i think i just have like a limit on the amount of people i can know at one time, ive always wanted more friends and i have more friends now!! sooo i dont realy need anyone else then? its very easy for me to feel satisfied with what i have, of course i am!!! grateful even!!!! so im like. it just doesnt matter so much to me. nice thought but i dont see it happening like i dont really WANT it to happen like i do but also. like. listen.

am i still gonna throw down to little love songs? absolutely yes sir!! to me tho like its feelings i can easily project onto my friends SKFJS like how me and my bestie kiss eachother on the head okay. because i loooooove them, its so easy because i love them!! its a love song, i dont care what kind of love its made for, i feel love and ill hear it how i want :] ITS. its some weird social bullshit okay, who says we cant? who says we cant go on little friend dates and kiss and hug and be in love with eachother while also being JUST friends? WHO SAYS!!!! its what i dont get, theres some disconnect between romantic and platonic love that i dont see at all. why should one be more valued than the other? hogwash okay its gobbledygook its. nonsense!!! im glad i dont see it that way, the hard part is finding other people who also dont see it that way, i realize my feelings on it arent STANDARD.. still, im satisfied. i have a lot of love to give and im always allowed to give it, isnt that so wonderful?

[consistent-self-destruction]

oh wow, the last time i posted was basically exactly a year ago lol.

well both a lot and nothing's changed much, i'm back to b emo again so that alone should say enough without saying anything

if anything things have gotten WORSE lmfao, i'm literally not supposed to be here right now but unfortunately the attempt fucking failed

nobody tells you how embarrassing that is - how did you fail at everything INCLUDING trying to kill yourself LMFAO, LIKE DAMN YOU REALLY CANT WIN

okay im being silly to cope but idk. when i got in touch with my counselor after it happened, she asked how much i wanted to be alive here on a scale from 1-10, with 10 being i literally wanna die right now in this instant, and 1 being miraculous healing and lifetime peace. the first day after i told her 8.5. three days later i said 3. it's a few weeks later now, and ive realized that my answer to the question has been sliding up and down everyday.

this is not even what i wanna talk about, i don't know how i ended up talking about that lol. anyway actually wait ANOTHER sb but artists im obsessed with rn: ka$hdami and 6arelyhuman okay moving on now ummm im trying so hard to be a 1 on that scale and maintain optimism and hope but like things keep going wrong and everything keeps irritating me and i genuinely feel like shit and i dont want to feel like shit because freaking 2014 just started, the year just started but unfortunately i am not optimistic about this year at all - i can't predict what will happen or how it will go or feel, everything is uncertain and im tired of being so unsure and incapable and it makes me want to leave earth because it's all just so tiring and now im just rambling hhhhh

to gather my thoughts coherently.. im bleeding out my fucking gooch. my charger is broken and wont charge my phone unless it's at an angle. my back camera is broken, my phone's been having storage issues, i don't feel pretty these days, i don't know what to do with my hair, it's freaking cold as hell in my house, i've got a sore throat, the only bathroom in the house with a bathtub has cold water so i can't take any soothing baths which is one of the best parts of being home, my sleep schedule is entirely in reverse, and i just feel so energetically exhausted. the house is a mess and my room is cluttered and my mom wants me to take down the christmas decorations, and i WANT to because cleaning makes me feel productive but i just don't have the stamina or ENERGY, like i feel physically sick and unwell and irritated and run down and incapable and i hate it so much, why is 2024 already off to the worst. and that's just in the present tense. in the future tense, like i said i am not optimistic about this year at all. i anticipate it being a really really difficult year and it makes me wanna cry because i don't wanna do it but i know i need to. you know how they say you have to get through the storm to see the other side? or some shit like that idfk, i dont wanna go through the storm! im so tired of the rain im so tired of being cold im so tired of goosebumps and anxiety and uncertainty and all of it !!!!!!! i've been trying to find my way through a storm for YEARS and it has not let up ONCE. i want to stop but i tried doing that and the universe just took me off pause and made me keep going, why couldn't they just let me join the stars. it would've been so much easier.

instead i have to stay here and try my best to heal and recover and work around my issues but i just can't imagine it, i can't imagine getting better i just don't see it. i can daydream about a version of myself that's better and stronger all i want, but i know in my heart that she'll never exist because i've been trying to be her for years and i just can't get there. i keep falling short. i keep failing. i keep taking L after L after L and im just. so. tired. i don't want to try anymore.

it's not always like this. sometimes there will be something that motivates me and makes me feel inspired to live again. but it always passes by and i come back to these feelings and this state. i keep falling back into this hole and it's such an exhausting up and down and back and forth.

the reason im here being emo again is i just feel like i can't talk to anyone about this. usually when i come back to this freaking blog that's the case. i always come back here when i have feelings that i need to release but i dont feel comfortable sharing with anyone. i don't wanna say anything on my spam because i don't want anyone to see all this negativity and darkness in me, and i don't want my close friends and innocent people to be randomly laden with this kind of depressing energy just as the year FRESH started and they're only casually scrolling their feed. you know what i mean? i hate scrolling my feed and seeing depressing shit. i don't wanna do that to my friends. i want peace and good vibes and good energy and a clean refreshing start to the year for them. i want them to be happy. i dont wanna post on my spam something that will gut their heart out, bring their mood down, and make them see me different. and it's the same with my best friend. not so much the last part cause they already know all these sides of me. and that is really relieving. but the only reason why i hold back from telling them this right now is because of the first reason - the year just started. they don't need this energy. we've already been having realtalks that are depressing enough. they dont need me calling them and texting them every time i feel depressed and manic and lost - that would be so shitty and i hate people who do that. it's energy stealing and self-centered. and for obvious reasons i don't talk to my family about these things. so i am left with this silly little blog, my beautiful void. oh how i love speaking into the void. it gives the illusion of speaking to someone without actually speaking to anyone. it's a perfect release.

but yeah idk, long story short im on my period, im sick with a sore throat, freezing in my house, feeling ugly and tired and incapable and irritated, with an inability to find optimism for the future and worst of all NO HOES! <;/3333

dude.. no because my love life is an entirely different type of pain. it's so... dude.

in the very least, i should be starting long-term therapy this year. that's the plan at least. my counselor gave me some recommendations, offices to call, and i have my dad's support. i'm gonna call in the numbers either tomorrow or thursday. i say this as "in the least" because even though i know it's supposed to be helpful, im not too optimistic about it. i don't like how many times i've used that word smfh. but im not - i don't really look forward to opening up about my 5 billion issues to a complete stranger. i have a hard enough time with the idea of how people perceive me. when i first started having sessions with my counselor, it really did not help because i didn't open up to her in the way i was supposed to. i told her surface level shit and sugar coated things instead of telling her the important things. im worried im only going to do that again. i don't like people seeing the worst of me - even when im PAYING them to see that side of me and when i NEED to show that side of me in order to FIX it. rahhhhhh. i also don't really look forward to it because i just see it as something large and overwhelming and unsolvable. my mental health that is. i don't look forward to tackling it in therapy. for only once a week? with that rate it's gonna take YEARS for me to figure myself out. and not only do i not have that kind of time, but it sounds so frustrating - slow agonizing progress, if any progress is made at all. im in such a pessimistic mood right now and i'm really not always like this - but this is also just the logical side of my brain. i just don't see it working out. i want it to. i want it to work badly - that's why we're going to try it. but i still am not optimistic about what the outcome will be and i am more daunted by the emotional and mental energy it will take out of me. i am second guessing if i should do school at the same time as therapy. i don't think any of this will go well. i only see myself getting consumed by things all over again - losing energy and motivation and time and getting depressed when everything goes wrong again. i think i might just also be scared by the process of healing. healing itself is not scary - but the process is terrifying. i don't trust it. i don't know if it will work. every time i thought i was healing i was just spiraling into a new unknown. the process of healing sounds so energetically draining, it sounds so deceptive, it sounds so emotionally torturing, it sounds fake, and it sounds incredibly time consuming and i already am NOT in time's favor. so i guess that's why i am not optimistic about this year - because i already know what the theme is. i already know what my focus is. this year for me, is all about healing and learning myself better. learning how to overcome my worst habits, my worst thoughts and emotions, and navigate situations that trigger them. this year is intended to be the year i start therapy. the year i put my mental health in the spotlight after years of trying to navigate it and figure it out on my own. i know the fact that im going to have professional support and guidance is supposed to be encouraging, but im so focused on the fact that there is so MUCH i need support and guidance with - and i need to tackle all of it once a week.. while in school... engaging with the very environment that deeply triggers me as i try not to be triggered, figure out ways around being triggered, SUCCEED at not getting triggered so i can therefore succeed in my academic environment, AND also figure out ways to make money on my own on the side. and that's not even going into deeper detail. idk, i just have so many needs to meet, and a billion things on my mind - obligations, responsibilities, needs, and they're all scrambled up in this big black scribble in my brain that's so thick i can hardly see through to the other side. and i don't like that blockage. i don't like that lack of foresight and clarity. i don't like the uncertainty. it makes me nervous and hesitant and resistant. i want to resist this year and this life so badly.

but all in all im just so tired. as always. it never goes away. the rage and frustration and exhaustion it just never goes away and i just really want a long long hug and a nice backrub.

please.

- 1.3.24 | 1:05 AM -

[hyperfixationspam]

s2 finale liveblog

good morning sluts i am so fucking scared

hes in his meditation era

"idk a wave or something" babygirl i love you

OH THE DADDY ISSUES

STOP SAYING SIMPLE

SSHSHSKSHDJS POOR BABYGIRL HE WANTS TO BE ADOPTED SO BAD

SWEETHEART WHAT ARE YOU DOING

IS HE BEING MUTINIED FROM FISHING 😭😭😭

YEAH THEY ARE DICKS TELL EM BB

ZHENG IS FINE SHES IN THE TRAILER FUCK YOU

"britain never shall be slaves" 🫤 interesting choice of words

PETES POOR BALD HEAD 😭

JACKIE LOOKS SO SAD 😭😭

RICKY YOU BITCH MY ENEMY FUCK YOU

YOUR NOSE?? YOU FREAK

EWW YOU BITCH I HATE YOU

ZHENG!!!!!

OH GOD SHES HAVING FLASHBACKS

OH THIS IS WHERE THAT SCENE IS FROM

AUNTIE CANT BE DEAD NOO 😭😭😭

ZHENG BB GET UP PLS

STEDE!!!!

"or is it?" loser i love you

ZHENG HELL YEAH!!!!!

her fixing her pigtails 😭 shes so cute

ED POOR SWEETIE

OH. OK.

hes already added a third daddy to have issues about what an icon

YEAHHHHHHHH LETS FUCKIN GOOOOOO

SHUT UP RICKY FUCK YOU FUCK YOU

lmaooo izzy coming into "well actually 🤓☝️"

PINOCCHIO 😭😭 WE LOVE A CALLBACK

IZZY STOP WITH THE CANDLES

"the brains of this operation" 🤮🤮🤮 U RACIST BITCH

IZZY LORE???

HEY JACKIE. WHATS THAT. JACKIE

THE SOLDIERS READING THE LETTER NO NO NO NO

SOOOOOOOBS

ED READING THE ROMANTIC LETTER WHILE MURDERING THESE BITCHES 😭😭 I LOVE YOU

GNOSSIENE REMIX???

"WE WROTE OUR NAMES ON EACH OTHER" SHUT UPPPPPP

SWEET BABY

"you wrote me a lovely letter!!! 😡" why is he mad now shskdhskd

stede practically tripping over his own feet is so funny

NOW WOULD BE A GOOD TIME FOR OUR BEAUTIFUL ROMANTIC HERO TO STEP IN

YEAHHHHH

THE MUSICAL CALLBACK 😭😭😭😭

OH MY GOD ITS JUST LIKE HIS DREAM THIS IS SO FUNNY AND HEARTBREAKING AND STUPID AND LIFE SHATTERING

zheng being like "ok we need to hurry this up so you bitches can be gay" queen

THE LONG AWAITED FIGHTING TOWARDS EACH OTHER SCENE!!!!!!

HAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAAA

SWEETHEARTS 💕💕💕💕💕

KISSY!!!!!!!

"lifes a dick" real 😭

KISSY!!!!! THATS KISSY NUMBER FIVE NUMBER SIX IF YOU COUNT THE SECRET ONE

HE SAID IT!!!!!! HE SAID IT!!!!!!

bro hit him with the star wars reference 🫤

ZHENG 😭😭

wait has ed not met zheng??? i completely forgot

"shes super tough" "GUYSSSSS FUUUUUUUCK" i love her so much she is everything to me

"FOR LOOOOOVE" HAHAHAHA

"we need someone to pee on the shirt" hey im sorry what did i just walk into

AUNTIE!!!!!!!

"ive got plenty of blood" yeah i can see that

LMAOO THEM JUST CHILLING NEXT TO THE BODIES OF THE DEAD SOLDIERS

"oh you saw the flip ☺️" lmaooo

"i caught it 🥰" cuteeee

BABE!!!!!

"men have cost her too much" lore??? also me too bitch the fuck

"ur not a man" oh transgender? "ur soft" 🫤

"you dont do soft?? 😫" olu baby ily

izzy im scared for u pls stop taunting him

"because....." we're gay? "we're good" ok that works too

"you are a rancid syphilitic cunt 💅" iconic

"ooh theres a lot of them 🫤" stede saw his bf and forgot about strategy

OH SHIT SHE DID POISON THEM. WAIT FUCK WHO ELSE IS POISONED.

"is that us doing that" STEDE YOU DUMBASS 😭😭😭😭

wait theyre poison trained??? wtf 😭

"no!!!!! let me kill him 🥰" beautiful

bruh olu having to remind her to be nice 😭

"i am. proud. of you. 😐" so genuine 💞

ZHENG MY SWEETHEART MY SWEET GIRL

ASS SHOT?????? HELLO?????????

ok ur taking the outfits but who took the underwear too 😭😭

zheng lookin kinda 🥵🥵🥵

how are they all rocking this its a navy uniform its not supposed to look good

is frenchie wearing eyeliner hell yeah

ok yeah why did you trust ricky with that

DID. DID IZZY JUST GET SHOT. HELLO

why did olu grab that guy so intimately it looked like he was about to kiss him 😭

JIM IS JIM OK

OH GOD IZZYS ABOUT TO DIE ISNT HE. HES ABOUT TO BE WUZZY

OK AT LEAST JIM SEEMS FINE

OLU I LOVE YOU SILLY BOY

AUNTIE??????? NO NO NO

WHY IS LUCIUS RUNNING SO GAYLY 😭😭😭

izzys makeup he looks so close to death oh god

"SIT WITH ME EDDIE" FUUUUUUCK

"IM SORRY" GOD FINALLY

GOD HES FINALLY ACKNOWLEDGING IT. I CAN DIE IN PEACE. HOPEFULLY IZZY CAN TOO I GUESS

"it was us" FUCK FUXK FUCK FUXK FUCK FUUUUUCK

"i wanna go" OH MY GODDDDD

"youre my only family" "oh fuck off you twat" yeah thats the proper response 😭

"JUST BE ED" FUCKU FUXK FUCK FUXK

OH MY GOD. THE "THERE HE IS" PARALLEL. OH MY GOD. OH MY GOD.

OH MY FUCKING GOD HE FUCKIN DEAD

congratulations to con o neill for doing the most convincing dead eyes ive ever seen thats a bit terrifying

STEDE PLEEEEASE GO GET YOUR MAN DONT JUST STAND THERE

OH THEYRE BURYING HIM HES LIKE DEAD DEAD NO RISING FROM THE GRAVE FOR HIM

ROACH GIVING THE MIDDLE FINGER SHSKDHSKF

"he was a fucking nightmare what a guy" spitting straight facts

"i think wed be good together. kick a lotta ass" hell yeah wlw mlm solidarity

oh shit rickys still alive i forgot 😭

"shes said enough" HAHAHAHAHA

WEDDING WEDDING WEDDING WEDING YES YES YES YES

fang are u ok

ED........ THOSE EYES........

MATEYS!!!!!!!!!!

ok fang is not ok pls get this boy some therapy

"or kiss or something" 😭

CUTIES!!!!!!!! HUSBANDS!!!!!! MATEYS!!!!!!! CUTIES!!!!!!!!!

NINA SIMONE HELL YEA

WAIT IS FRENCHIE FIRST MATE FOR REAL NOW

OH SHIT JACKIES HERE TOO. FOUND FAMILY UNION!!!!

sugarballs????? 😭😭😭

WAIT ED AND STEDE STAYED BEHIND OH FUCK

INNKEEPERS!!!!!!!

OH MY GODDDDDDD

BUTTONS??????

frenchie skinny legend

wait who pissed on the towel

WHAT ARE THEY GONNA DO FOR S3 IF THEYRE BEHIND THO. LIKE IM HAPPY FOR THEM BUT WHAT ABOUT S3