#(i am that freak)

[imperatoralicia]

Just having some drinks at the local saloon.

[clownsuu]

God I love the insane amounts of d r i p Stanley just casually wears

[ladysqueakinpip]

guys hot uquiz was just discovered but I'm taking it about 100 yrs too late. anyways everyone share how wifeable you are.

THE WIFE RATING SCALE 1929

[skyefeys]

happy investigations port announcement

[hinamie]

make it vicious, take a stab

[cenomatic]

🫶

[carlyraejepsans]

there is something wrong with you

there is something wrong with you that is also wrong with me

[i-love-you-just-the-same]

something I do a lot without even meaning to is call people babe, honey, sweetheart, etc, but it's usually in a context that's a joke not like just in passing etc. it's the southern or the whore in me, idk. it's not even flirty, I just do it for the silliness. but when someone does something especially nice for me I occasionally go "you're the love of my life" or "we're getting married." no idea why I chose to express myself this way, but usually it gets a blush or a giggle (very rarely do I do this to a man).

however, I would do it to simon riley.

it's some small task that would only take ten minutes max. he brought you a sandwich from the mess or he finished up a bit of paperwork for you. so you forget yourself in glee and it slips out.

"Riley, we're getting married"

he freezes as you chirp out a "thanks babe!" as an afterthought and munch while filling out a health survey.

he just stares at you, nods, and heads off. you thought that'd be the end of it until he turns up an hour later with a bountonniere and a bouquet. he shoves the later at you.

"heard you say you liked these once" he mumbles as he sits down beside you. you look up confused at him.

"Riley, what are these for?" you say with a little grin. you've never got flowers from anyone before.

"my wife gets what she wants. always." he says, placing a hand on your thigh. "c'mon. not open much longer."

your eyes widen at his words. he tugs you up and out, asking if you have anything you want to wear or should you guys stop somewhere to pick up a dress. he swears he won't look beforehand, he'll just see you at the courthouse in it. he'll pay and he's got a dinner reservation afterward, sorry it's not before! do you want to take his last name?

please, doll, call him simon.

gaz is going to do pictures and price and soap will be witnesses. he's sorry it's rushed bird, but the quicker it's official the quicker he can start his husbandly duties.

[hilacopter]

tbh ryoko kui cooked with this one why is this the funniest image I have ever seen

[draculasdatter]

girl what kind of interview with the vampire is this

[fernsnailz]

BORN TO FAIL - A SONIC THE HEDGEHOG FANZINE

a look into the thoughts, futures, and failures of a select few sonic robots. what lives to they build for themselves, and how do they learn to live in the first place?

OUT RIGHT HERE ON ITCH.IO FOR FREE!!! donations are appreciated, but not required.

[egophiliac]

YO TREY CLOVER IS HERE !!!

TREY NOOOO you weren't supposed to look so cool, I was supposed to be able to save my keys for all the upcoming birthdays, how could you do this to me --

also hey. hey Trey. what's in that bowl.

[glassclownz]

this fucker won’t let me sleep (he’s in my head trying to steal my credit card information)

[noodles-and-tea]

Cuddly!!

[words-writ-in-starlight]

honestly my mother was a huge champ about her eight-year-old asking to be bought an unabridged edition of the Odyssey for a birthday present, and then she was an equally huge champ about reading her eight-year-old the unabridged Odyssey as a bedtime story and pausing every four lines to define something for me, and let me just say that I have fucking TREASURED the opportunity to reverse that old tradition by more or less forcing her to sit on my couch and listen to Epic and pause it every four lines for my dissertation

[buglvr24]

today i asked a trekkie coworker if he shipped spock and kirk. when he said no i asked why and he replied: “i think spock can do better”