#(every August I want to appreciate this series but I also have to think of the people I lost and it will be like that every single year)

[multifandomgirl08]

Give Me Eyes To See [Mini Verstappen Series]

Dad!Max Verstappen x Mother!Reader (Established Relationship)

Summary: Nikita's first few days at home. Flashbacks to moments from the reader's pregnancy.

Warning(s): Flashbacks, Mentions of giving birth (Non-graphic)

A/N: All of the Flashbacks are individual things that were written that I condensed into this. The last flashback could have been its own part but I thought it fit better here. Title taken from the song Home by Corey Taylor.

Words: 2.7k

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Max had grown to love the backyard. It was a big reason as to why they had chosen this house when he and Y/N had talked about moving.

It was quiet and peaceful here. It made time slow down and made him appreciate the little things in life. Like the little bundle of blankets that he was holding in his arms.

Max had never thought that he would be a father before he retired from racing. It was never in the cards for him. Nico had been a surprise in his life and Nikita had also been unexpected. The first time that Max had held Nico he thought he was small. Nikita was even tinier for just a few days old.

He was eating every three hours and wasn’t letting Y/N get any sleep. Max rocked Nikita as he slightly whimpered in the bundle. He was enamored with him.

Something so small that he helped create that had been in Y/N’s belly was now in his arms.

“I… I know that you are new to the world.” He muttered as Nikita dozed in his arms. “I just want you to know that as your Papa, I’ll do everything that I can to be there for you. I may not be there every day like your Mama, but I love you just as much.”

He laid his hand over Nikita’s chest, feeling the faint rise and fall of his little breaths under his hand.

As Max held Nikita, he couldn’t help but think back to the first time that he got to hold Nico. From the moment that both of his sons had come into his life, he knew he was going to do everything that he could, to do right by them.

August 7th, 2025

“What do you think about Nikita for a name?” You asked Max.

Max had just spent the last few hours trying to figure out the directions to put together the furniture that would be going in the baby’s room. After spending a few hours figuring out how the directions worked, he was now sitting on the couch in the family room with you looking through a book filled with baby names.

Max’s first thought was of Nikita Mazapin. He didn’t want a child of his, named after him.

“No.” He simply said.

“It means victory in Russian.” You offered while stroking your growing bump.

Now Max was even more against the idea. In the last few weeks, you had this idea of the baby having an Ni name like with Nico and you hadn’t let the idea go.

Max had put his gaming controller to the side pausing the current Fifa game that was on the screen.

“What about if it’s a girl?” He asked. He liked the possibility of there finally being a girl in the family. Victoria had two boys and he had Nico. Maybe it would be nice to have a little girl walking around that looked like you.

“Well, we’ll see when the baby finally comes.” You had both agreed that you wanted the gender of the baby to be a secret.

“But if it’s a boy, I know that I want him to have the middle name Daniel.”

Max couldn’t help but smile and shake his head. “Daniel?” He questioned. “My son, named after two F1 drivers. Nikita Mazapin and Daniel,” Max was okay with the baby’s middle name being taken from Daniel, Daniel was a good friend to him, a good uncle to Nico and he had been a great teammate.

You couldn’t help but look at him slightly confused. “Nikita Mazapin? I was thinking Nikita for Niki, like Niki Lauda.”

“Then why not Nikolaas, it’ll still be shortened to Niki.”

“This baby doesn’t really feel like a Nikolaas.”

“How about we make a deal? The baby is a boy, I’ll let you pick the name, anything you want. But it’s a girl I get to pick.”

Even as you agreed with Max, he knew in the end that you would get your way. He could never deny you anything. His second child, if it was a boy, was going to be named after Niki Lauda.

Max had come inside from sitting out on the terrace that led to the backyard. Nikita had been fussing a bit, probably due to the slight cold breeze this morning.

"Papa." Max heard from the hallway.

He looked up to see Nico standing outside of the door to the master bedroom. Nico was still in his pajamas holding the stuffed teddy bear that Charles had gotten him.

Max looked at Nico before moving his head to glance back at the bed where Y/N was still sleeping. He motioned for Nico to walk closer to him.

Since that moment that Nikita had come home with them, Nico had been curious about his little brother. How small he was. What type of food he was allowed to eat. When he could start to play with him.

Nico climbed onto the couch and scooted as close as he could to Max.

"Can I?" Nico asked, putting out his little hands.

Max nodded, placing the baby closer to Nico without putting him in his arms. Nico reached down to give Nikita a kiss on his forehead before the baby shifted in his swaddle.

Over the last few days, Max had noticed that Nikita wasn't a fussy baby. He only started crying when he was hungry or when he needed to be changed, besides that he just liked to sleep.

"He's small," Nico commented.

"Yes, he is. You were once that small too." Although Max had never gotten the chance to hold Nico when he was this small.

"No," Nico said with a shake of his head. Nico thought he was right about everything since Nikita had come home. As if, because he was Nikita's older brother he knew more now.

Max just nodded before Nico started to mumble at his younger brother. "Nikitha, Nikitha, Niki..." It seemed Nico had settled on before dropping his head against Max's arm and closing his eyes, his feet tucked under the blanket that was normally thrown over the couch.

Mother's Day - May 11, 2025

Everyone was coming over for Mother's Day, Max had Sophie, Victoria, her partner Tom, and Max's nephews flown in so they could spend the weekend with all of you.

Nico had already told both you and Max that he wanted to camp out in the living room with Luka and Lio when they came. Max had gone into the laundry room and pulled out extra sheets and pillows to make up the couches for the boys to sleep on. You had talked with Victoria about it and she was fine with it.

When everyone arrived you gave Victoria, Tom, and Sophie a tour of the house. The last time Sophie had been here was a week after you and Max got back from your honeymoon, and everything still wasn't unpacked. Victoria and Tom took in the house with fresh eyes, seeing the way that all of your and Max's things fit together in the new space. Nico, Luka, and Lio had gone into Nico's room to play with his toys.

The reason that you had invited everyone over was because both you and Max had been keeping the pregnancy to yourselves since you found out. You finally wanted to tell everyone since it was almost the end of your first trimester.

You had spent the first half of Sunday cooking before Max insisted that Sophie and Victoria take over for you. Sophie gave you a look that told you she knew that something was up.

When you finally sat down for dinner, food and drinks were going around the table. Tom went to fill the wine glass that was in front of you and you let him, wanting to wait to share your news until everyone had food on their plates.

You had been sitting to the left of Max when he reached for your hand, his thumb drawing little circles with the pad of his finger. You had initially planned to tell Sophie and Victoria that you were pregnant just after you and Max had gone back to the doctor. Eventually, you and Max agreed to wait until you were closer to the end of your first trimester.

About halfway through dinner, you could feel a set of eyes on you before looking up to see Sophie looking at you. She lightly tapped her wine glass with her finger before her eyes moved to yours which was still full from when Tom filled it earlier.

Max had taken the last bite of food off his plate before reaching for his glass to take a sip. His eyes traveled to you knowing that you couldn't drink any of the wine that was in your glass.

"I know that it is Mother's Day and we are all here as a family to celebrate the amazing woman in our lives who do so much for us," Max said lifting his glass. "So, Y/N and I have some news to share with you."

Everyone at the table was silent for a few moments before you spoke, "I'm pregnant."

Sophie and Victoria were quick to get out of their chairs hugging you and giving you their congratulations. Tom walked over to Max giving him a hug.

There was a piercing sound of chair legs scraping against the hardwood floor. Nico was quick to walk out of the room leaving everyone to walk downstairs with heavy steps. Victoria was quick to pull away from you and then Max moved his chair to follow after Nico.

You reached for Max's arm stopping him from following Nico, and then got up from your chair. You followed Nico into his bedroom, your fingers lightly rapping on the hardwood of his bedroom door. He looked up from where he lay in bed.

"Hi Mama," He quietly spoke.

"Hey," You moved to sit on the edge of Nico's bed.

You hadn't told Nico that you were pregnant thinking it better to wait a little.

"Are you sad that you're getting a sibling?" You asked.

Nico shook his head no, then shifted in his blue sheets dropping his head against your arm.

"You're my Mama," He whined. You moved to run your fingers through Nico's hair like you would do for Max. "I don't wanna share."

So Nico was upset that he would have to share you with the baby. "You share me with Papa." You told him.

"No, Papa shares you with me." He argued back. You gave Nico a small smile.

When Max wasn't home Nico had all of your attention, and when Max was home, Nico shared you with Max until Nico had to head to bed.

"Do you mind sharing me with Papa?" You asked him.

Nico shook his head no.

"Do you mind sharing me when Luka and Lio spend time with us?" You asked.

Nico shook his head no again and then moved his head into your lap squishing his chubby cheek into the material of your pants.

You weren't really sure what you could say to Nico about this to make him feel better. You and Max were having a baby and Nico would have to understand that the baby would need attention, a lot of attention for the first few months.

"Nico, you know that just because Papa and I are having a baby doesn't mean that we're not going to have time for you."

It was a little odd trying to reason with a four-year-old, but Nico needed to know that having a baby in the house wasn't going to change how much you loved him.

"You forget me with the baby." he blubbered.

"I'm not going to forget you, and neither is Papa." You pulled him into your lap so he could rest his head on your shoulder. "No one is going to replace you." You kissed Nico's cheek and then his hair. You looked up to see Max leaning against the doorway.

He quickly walked inside and sat on the other side of Nico. Nico looked up at Max before laying his head down again.

"How much did you hear?" You mouthed to Max.

He moved his index finger in a circle as if to say all of it. You nodded.

"Nico," Max started. "Mama and I love you, and there being a baby isn't going to change that."

Nico moved away from you and turned toward Max, "Not true."

This was one of those moments where you could tell that Nico had gotten his stubbornness from Max.

"It's true," Max said. "Mama and I are going to be busier taking care of the baby. But we're not going to love you less."

Nico threw himself into your arms, "Baby can have my toys, not my Mama."

Part of you wanted to laugh, Nico was quick to give up all of his toys before he was willing to give you up. You and Max shared a look before you both smiled at one another.

"Well, what if we told you that the baby was for you to have someone to play with?" You asked Nico.

Nico looked up at you before looking over at Max, he furrowed his brows in confusion. "I play with the baby?"

You nodded at Nico. "Yes, and you can share all of your toys with them, and get to go swimming together, and come to Paps's races."

"It's your job as the oldest to protect your younger sibling like I do with Auntie Vic." Max pointed out.

As you and Max told Nico more about the things that he got to do now that he was going to be an older brother you could tell that he was slowly coming around to the idea.

Later on in the evening after the table was cleared Nico and his cousins ended up all asleep on the living room couches while everyone else went out to the back patio. You ended up curled up against Max, his hand on your growing bump while talking with Sophie and Victoria. It was mostly the same stories that you had heard about Max as he grew up. Tom was talking with Max about the end of PSV's season before you all called it a night.

The sound of light voices woke you up, you were tired from the lack of sleep and turned towards Max's side of the bed to see the clock read one hour until you had to feed Nikita again.

You slowly sat up seeing Max, Nico, and Nikita all on the couch that the bed overlooked.

"When can we play?" Nico asked.

"He's too little to play yet," Max replied.

"But Mama said that I could play with him when he came."

"Nico, he's too young to play right now, but once he's older you can play together."

You shifted in the sheets a bit letting out an uncomfortable groan trying to sit up against the pillows behind you. Your pregnancy had gone as smoothly as possible, and the birth was close to perfect. However, you were still sore in your abdomen. Your OB told you if it didn't go away by the next time she saw you, she would end up prescribing you something mild so you could still breastfeed Nikita.

"Mijn leeuwin, are you okay?" Max asked turning away from Nico towards you.

You silently nodded, "Fine, just sore."

Nico had abandoned Max on the couch climbing into bed with you, scooting close in the king-size bed to lay next to you his feet hanging off the edge of the bed, clutching the little brown bear in his arms.

Max got up from the couch and slowly walked over before getting under the bedsheets again, you helped pull back the sheets while Max moved Nikita in his arms to his other side. Nikita's head lay against Max's shoulder still sleeping with Nico throwing his arm over your middle.

You looked over at Max, he pressed his lips together and you knew that he was trying to hold back a few tears before a wide smile broke out on his face.

"I love you." You mouthed silently.

"I love you too." He said back. He quickly reached up and kissed your hair as you snuggled in closer to his side.

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[myownwholewildworld]

wherever you go (a joel miller's ff) - chapter 5

chapter 4 | series masterlist | main masterlist | chapter 6

pairing: outbreak!2003!joel x f!reader. (it's actually 2004 now)

summary: after what happened a couple of months ago, you are ready to move forward. joel? not so much. he might need a little... prodding.

warnings: 18+, mdni. internal and verbal discussions of feelings, trauma and past relationships. some jealousy (if you squint very hard). porn with plot or plot with porn (however you wanna look at it). again, absolutely filthy smut because i don’t know any better (sorry not sorry). fluff. voyeurism (you spy on joel). masturbation (f and m). oral (f and m receiving). finger sucking. unprotected piv. praise kink. sir kink. size kink. cum eating. a bit of cum play. multiple orgasms. overstimulation. squirting. dirty talk. you are very needy in this one and joel is very possessive over you. soft!dom!joel. aftercare. pet names (darlin’, sweetheart, baby, honey). i'm sure i'm forgetting something lol. reader is female, no other description given. reader is mid-late 20s, joel is 36. no use of y/n.  joel’s and reader’s pov.

a/n: hiya! first i want to thank you all for the positive feedback this series has gotten! [: i started writing this for myself mainly, and decided to post it here thinking that if a couple of people liked it, it'd make my heart happy. also, i have taken some licenses with joel's past, as neither the game nor the tv show gives many details (you'll understand what i mean). anyways! after the last chapter, our two protagonists (you!) deserve a bit of calm, peace and quiet... right? 😈 as always, thank you all for engaging. i do appreciate any comments, reblogs and/or likes you may want to leave! even asks/requests/side stories if you want to! take care lovelies <3 x

w/c: ~6.3k (sorry?).

tags (let me know if you want to be added/removed from the list pls!): @yesjazzywazzylove-blog @pedrospurplerain @missladym1981

August came around relatively quickly. Tommy had proposed you got closer to civilisation, which meant long trekking trips while the sunlight was still up. Joel agreed reluctantly, as he still thought that was dangerous. You just went along with it, letting them decide ― you didn’t really care where you ended up as long as the Millers were by your side.

Well, one of them especially.

At daytime you barely had time to yourself. However, the story was completely different at nighttime. The second you closed your eyes, snippets of what had happened two months ago flooded your memory. For the first few weeks, the nightmares were unbearable. You would wake up in the dead of night, sweaty and shaking.

And every time you woke up, Joel was by your side. He would hug you while you both laid on improvised beds, no matter how uncomfortable it was. Neither of you would talk, you would just cry in silence while your panic attack subsided ― Joel holding you throughout the whole episode. He had truly been a rock you could hold onto in the middle of a sea storm.

It got to the point where Tommy had started to realise that something was up between you two. Neither you nor Joel denied nor confirmed anything, although Tommy never asked. He would just look away when his brother would attend to you if you fell behind or would offer to do the first night shifts so Joel could be by your side at bedtime.

You were somewhat sure that Joel really cared about you. The way he would look at you… it sent shivers down your spine. The intensity in his eyes was hypnotising ― sometimes you would find yourself lost in his brown orbs, unable to look away. You also really cared about him.

You didn’t want to put a label to your feelings, mainly because you were not sure how Joel would react. You had come to understand that the man was prone to evade any topic about his feelings in general ― physical, emotional or otherwise. You could still not get him to tell you whenever he felt off. Since the blow to his head a couple of months back, Joel had been suffering with horrible headaches, to the point where he had fainted in a couple of instances.

The man was such a closed book you found out about his deceased wife the same way you knew about Sarah ― through Tommy. You assumed he had one or at least a partner at some point in time before the outbreak. The younger brother didn’t give you many details though, not that you asked either ― some wounds were better left untouched.

You liked Tommy a lot. He was a godsend ― so very different to Joel, but so similar in many ways. He was talkative and filled in long silences with stories about how they would cause mayhem at home when they were kids. You didn’t know if they were true or not, but they were entertaining nonetheless. You were under the impression that Tommy was the one who got into sticky situations and Joel was the one who had to fix them.

“I’m gonna go to the lake for a bit”, Joel told you, derailing your train of thought.

“No worries, I’ll get the fire going. Poor Tommy is always the one setting up camp”, you replied with a slight smile.

“Yeah, poor me, relegated to such unsignificant tasks”, said Tommy with a chuckle.

You smiled back and then looked in Joel’s direction. He was frowning at both of you, but quickly controlled his face expression.

“I’ll be back soon”, Joel crouched to look through his backpack, grabbing a couple of towels.

Something inside of you twisted. But you pushed the thought to the back of your head. You had already volunteered to start the fire.

You really tried to focus on the bonfire. And after a few attempts, you finally got it going. Joel had not come back yet from the lake ― it had only been ten minutes, but you were slightly worried in case he had lost consciousness again while no one was around.

“I’ll go check on him”, you told Tommy.

He looked at you with a sarcastic smile.

“Sure thing”, he replied while he started to skin a rabbit.

You rolled your eyes before you left in the direction Joel had gone.

You walked the hundred metres that separated the camp and the lake. The brothers had ensured the area was completely devoid of human existence before they decided to settle there for the night. You were now in Mark Twain National Forest, near St. Louis. You had checked out Kansas City a week ago, but both Tommy and Joel had deemed it too unsafe. So Chicago was your final destination. None of you knew what you would encounter there, but it was worth a try. The wilderness had not proven to be any safer.

Before you got to the bank of the lake, you spotted Joel in the water. He had his back towards you, your eager eyes checking out his broad shoulders, the water level up to his hips. He ran his fingers through his hair, slicking it back.

You stopped walking, somewhat mesmerised, your head slightly tilted to one side with curiosity. In the last two months, you had discovered a new side to Joel you didn’t know he had.

You guessed that what happened that night also affected him in a different way it did you. After he almost decapitated that man, you saw guilt in his eyes when he looked at you ― you still sometimes caught a glimpse of it to this day. As you found out later, that culpability was because he felt responsible for what those men did to you ― he really thought he could have done more. And he did in a sense, because for the next couple of days he hunted down every man in that group until there was no one left to hurt you. Apparently, that was not enough in his eyes, although it was in yours. But as much as you tried to explain that to him, it just wouldn’t sink in. He was so stubborn it made you go crazy sometimes.

Although Joel had been there for you emotionally, he had not touched you for the last two months. You managed to steal a few kisses from him and that was it. He had been extremely cautious with you in that respect. You were relieved he was as you tried to come to terms with what had happened, but after a few weeks it started to feel… frustrating. You were not broken and despite what he thought, you still had needs.

He suddenly looked over his right shoulder, offering you his side profile ― to you, he was gorgeous. Feeling like a child caught causing mischief, you quickly hid behind a tree. Joel looked around, eyebrows touching in confusion, but then he shook his head as if he was imagining things and proceeded to cup his hands in the water to wet his face.

You couldn’t not watch. You instantly realised that was the first time you saw him naked. The last ―and, regrettably, the only― time you two had sex, he was fully clothed. There was something very intimate about seeing him washing up.

You were so transfixed on the picture in front of you it was like the world had disappeared around you. Joel rubbed his skin with a hand towel ― his strong arms, his chest, his back, his lower stomach… Your breath quickened a bit, your heart picking up a pace. Everything about him invited you in ― it wasn’t only his rugged appearance that appealed to you, but also his character.

You started to feel hot. Had the temperature suddenly gone up? It seemed like it. Joel put the hand towel on his left shoulder. When you saw his right hand disappear below the water in front of him, your mouth went dry wishing it was your hand. You wanted to help him clean his manhood so badly ― memories of his delightful cock rocking you into a trance short-circuited your brain.

Before you could stop yourself, you placed one hand on your belly, biting your bottom lip. You finally gave in to temptation, pushing past the edge of your panties. You dipped two fingers in your slit, doing circular movements around your clit. Your eyes, albeit halfway closed in pleasure, could not leave Joel as he kept on freshening up. You pushed down your fingers a bit more, sliding one of them in your needy hole.

You closed your eyes, a half-smile showing on the corner of your lips. That felt so good. If Joel was going to do nothing about it ― fine, you would. Still behind the tree, out of sight, you held on to the bark with your free hand, upping the rhythm of your wet fingers, your thumb rubbing that tight knot in your fold. Then you slightly opened your eyes again ― you wanted to stare at Joel while you came.

But he wasn’t there anymore. You frowned, confused, but you were too busy to worry about that right now. So you closed your eyes again to fully focus on the task at hand. You leaned your forehead against the tree, feeling your orgasm wash over you with intensity. You pressed your lips, suppressing a moan as to not alert Joel of your presence.

“Am I interrupting?”, his soft voice forced you to glance in his direction with starry eyes.

He was on your righthand side, just half a metre away from you. Entirely naked in all his glory, an erection creeping up on him. You were speechless, partially because you had been caught spying on him and partially because you were still feeling the last remnants of your climax, your inner walls crying for something to choke.

“I―I…”, you really tried to excuse yourself, but your voice faltered when your eyes checked him out from top to bottom.

His body was chiselled, his muscles somewhat defined, especially around his waist. He had a pronounced V line with a hairy, happy trail which you avidly followed with your eyes until you were gifted with the sight of his veiny cock. You unconsciously licked your bottom lip.

Your fingers were still dunked in your warm pussy. Joel grabbed your wrist and took your hand out of your underwear, raising it to eye level. Your digits were sticky, covered in your own cum. You should feel ashamed, but you definitely didn’t. Not with him. Joel looked into your eyes, and, without breaking visual contact, he brought your slick fingers closer to his face. With no hesitation, he opened his mouth and pushed them into it, licking them clean. You felt your cunt gushing, eyelids half closed. You could have easily come again for him, but he released your fingers far too quickly for your liking.

“You naughty girl”, he whispered as he pulled you from the wrist to get you closer to his chest. “You taste even better than what I imagined”.

“I didn’t think you were…”

“Aware of your presence? Always, darlin’”, he finished for you.

Your cheeks blushed when he freed your wrist and lifted your chin up. His thumb caressed your bottom lip, his mouth just an inch away from yours. You bowed to kiss him, but he backed up a little, denying you.

“Are you sure you wanna do this, sweetheart?”, he asked, you could hear the uncertainty in his voice.

You nodded vehemently.

“Yes, please, Joel, I really need to feel you, to have you fuck me senseless”, you emphasized, short-breathed.

He seemed to consider your words for longer than what was acceptable. You saw his eyes flying between yours and your lips.

“Please?”, you begged.

Your prayers might have been heard, because he leaned forward, brushing your mouth with his.

“Then go down on your knees, darlin’”, he whispered against your lips.

You silently gasped as your clit pulsed at his words. You were delighted to follow his command, and so you kneeled compliantly.

When your knees touched the grass, his cock was at eye level. You couldn’t help but marvel at the sight. His dick was as big as you remembered, the memory of it filling you up still haunted you. It was so erected now that the tip touched his belly button. Joel looked so strained you thought he had to be in pain. And you were more than willing to help him alleviate it.

You moved your hand forward, but before you could try to wrap your fingers around him, Joel stopped you.

“No, with your mouth”, was his order.

You intertwined your fingers on your lower back and inclined your heard towards him. You gazed up at him, his jawline very tense. You let your tongue out and shyly tapped his glans with the tip. Joel closed his eyes immediately and grumbled loudly as his cock twitched in front of you.

That was all you needed to spur you on. You widely opened your mouth to house his manhood and sealed your lips around the head, the tip of your tongue trying to push open the slit on his foreskin. You played with him for a bit while your jaw relaxed. Then you started to push him in further and further down your mouth, as far as you could take him. His glans pushed past your uvula, you could barely breathe, just as you had imagined a few months ago ― a dream come true. You bobbed your head back and forth, feeling him in your throat, your eyes watering. But you were still not close to have his dick entirely in your mouth ― he was so damn big.

Joel growled in ecstasy as he looked down to you. The sight of you on your knees with your mouth stuffed, bright beautiful eyes, your tongue maliciously inciting him… He just couldn’t believe how giving you were.

“Look at you with your mouth so full”, he said placing one of his hands under your chin. He could feel his own cock expanding your throat. “You look so damn pretty, baby”.

You leaned back a bit, releasing most of his erection except for the tip. With the help of one hand you started pumping his shaft, the other gently massaging his balls. Joel eyed you intensely while you ate him up like a lollypop. His salty flavour inundated all your senses, your eyes pinned on his.

His fingers clenched in frustration.

“Shit, stop, I’m gonna come”, he mumbled as he pushed back to free his dick from your wicked lips.

No way in hell, you thought. He was not about to deny you that. You had been thinking about this moment for fucking months, you wouldn’t let him take that pleasure away from you.

You grasped him by his ass, your palms firmly pressing on his buttocks to take his cock even deeper. You then gave him head as best as you knew how, fastening the rhythm when you felt the pulsation coming from him.

“Fuck, baby―”, he moaned your name as he came in your hot, wet cavity.

You felt his spent hit the back of your throat. It was so tangy and musky. You swallowed all of it. Ah, delicious, you thought gleefully. You let go of his ass and released his dick from the prison of your lips.

You placed the palms of your hands on your knees, still on the ground, and glanced up at him innocently with a sweet smile painting your face. You then opened your mouth, sticking your tongue out to show Joel you had eaten all his cum ― a bridge of spit connecting the tip of your tongue to his glans.

He dropped one hand to break off the arch of saliva between you and him with his index, and fed it to you ― you gladly accepted, sucking his finger clean.

“Did I do good, sir?”, you asked with a small voice, looking for praise.

“Good? You did fucking splendid, sweetheart”, you beamed with the compliment and got up to your feet when he offered you a hand.

He took your hand, walking behind him as he headed towards the lake. He turned around to face you and kissed you slowly, his tongue caressing your palate. He then took a step back. The sun was setting on his back, the orange and red lighting reflecting off the waterbed. His brown eyes, bearded jaw, hooked nose, his hair curling at the nape of his neck… He looked like a roman God ― Mars, you thought. Joel looked like a man about to fight for his life and yours on the battlefield.

He sat down on a massive flat rock one metre away from the bank of the lake, which was approximately two metres wide in both directions.

“Now undress for me, baby”, he instructed.

You did not hesitate ― all your clothing fell to your feet, piece by piece, while Joel eagerly watched the show you put on. He wetted his bottom lip while he readjusted his cock on his lap. You stood there with dreamy eyes, awaiting. He motioned one hand towards the rock he was sat on, an invitation for you to join him.

Once you were sat on his right, he placed his left hand around the front of your neck ― a very slight touch that forced you to flatten your back against the rock while he positioned himself on top of you. He bit your chin while his left hand put a sweet amount of pressure on your throat. You could tell he was controlling himself.

“My turn”, he whispered, coming off you.

He got off the rock, kneeling on the ground in front of you. You put your elbows down on the rock to lift your torso and be able to look at him, your knees bent, the sole of your feet against the cold surface of the rocky platform. Joel grabbed you by the hips and scooted your ass over to the edge of the rock. Your legs were firmly pressed against each other, trying to hide your quivering cunt ― suddenly you felt shy.

“Spread your legs open for me, darlin’, lemme see”, he commended you with his hands on your knees.

You couldn’t say no to him, you didn’t want to. So you obeyed, dropping your legs to the sides, offering him your dripping fold. He traced your slit with his index, and you moaned.

“You’re so fucking wet already. So receptive, aren’t you?”, he asked looking at you dead in the eye, his finger sinking in between your legs, looking for the entrance. “Who gets your pussy so wet?”, he pushed his fingertip in your hole, and you groaned loudly. “Who, darlin’? Use your words”.

“You, only you, sir”, you gasped.

“This is mine”. He pushed in the second phalange.

You closed your eyes, trying to control your breathing.

“All yours, yes”.

His finger got completely sucked in down to his knuckle, stroking your g-spot. You harshly pressed your lips.

“Exactly, don’t you dare forget that”, his tone was so serious you looked at him enigmatically, not really understanding where that sudden possessiveness came from, but you loved every bit of it. And you were more than happy to put his doubts to rest.

You nodded frantically.

“I would never, sir, I swear my pussy is all yours”, you really meant it.

“As it should be”, he added a second finger as he leaned forward and kissed your mound.

You sighed, eyes teary, and flattened your back against the rock again, as Joel made out with the fatty skin above your clit. He introduced a third finger, all of them rubbing your anterior wall. Then his mouth dropped and sucked in your clit. Your knees trembled while you held both of your breasts, playing with your nipples and biting down your lip to stop your wanton screams. He insisted with his kissing until your wet cunt started fluttering around his fingers, a clear tell you were about to come. He stroked your clit with his teeth, very lightly, sending shivers up your spine. Your legs pressed against his head, tension building up. And then, finally, sweet release. You came so hard on his mouth, and he drank it all.

He unburied his head from in between your legs and glanced at you with a sufficient smile.

“You taste even better directly from your creamy cunt, baby”, you were glad he was so talkative during sex, especially if it was to praise you.

Joel placed the palm of his hand over your mound, his fingers covering your damp pussy, and rubbed with just the right amount of friction. You exhaled slowly.

“I’m gonna make you come again”, he promised.

You pursed your lips, your cunt palpitating at the prospect.

“I don’t know if I can―”, you uttered under your breath.

He raised an eyebrow, almost as if he was offended. Joel grabbed your thighs and pulled towards him; the back of your knees placed on his shoulders.

“Don’t doubt me, of course you can. I said I’ll make you”, his mouth was so close to your moist pussy you felt his cool breath on your damp skin.

You whimpered when his tongue swept your entire slit unhurriedly, from your perineum to your clit, his hand climbing up your body to squeeze one of your breasts firmly. Joel repeated that move a few times ― and your brain chemistry would be changed forever after that. He briefly pinched your nipple while he paid special attention to the core of your pleasure. Joel smothered your clit with his lips ― you closed your eyes while placing a hand over his on your boob.

Joel’s tongue stopped torturing you for a second. He nudged your clit with the tip of his hooked nose and then inhaled your sweet smell. That scent was making him go wild with lust to the point where he started fisting his cock, the tip already leaking with precum. He flattened his tongue against your swollen lips, wiggling it through the slit to touch your needy hole. He could not believe you were this wet for him ― if he had the chance, he would drink from your seeping fold every single day. This was how ambrosia tasted like ― he was damn sure of it.

He placed his hands to each side of your puffy flaps to spread your pussy open, while the tip of his tongue slipped inside of you. Your free hand flew to his head, fisting a handful of hair. Your toes clenched as he started to fuck your hole with his tongue. You felt your whole uterus contracting so hard it was almost painful. Your cum started to ooze out as a new orgasm hit you with full force, yelling his name. Joel did not waste any of it, licking it off you shamelessly.

What just happened ― that felt like sin, the most beautiful sin you had ever experienced. Your breathing was so irregular you thought you were going to have a heart attack. Then you heard Joel snickering as he got back up to his feet.

“See? Told ya”, he said smugly as you placed the elbows on the rock to lift your chest and glance at him.

He was jerking off, his cock ready for you again. You sat back up and leaned forward, your hands on his muscular thighs as you kissed the slippery tip, the shaft, then his balls. You showered pecks all over his manhood, worshipping it.

“S-sorry, sir, can I ask? Is your cock only mine? P-please?”, you asked in between smooches, almost panting, looking at him with puppy eyes.

Joel’s irises were swirling with desire, his hips slightly slanted forward towards your mouth, his dick visibly spasming while he caressed your cheek.

“All yours, yes”, he replicated your exact words, your heart fluttering with contempt.

You smiled at him before licking his testicles again ― your hand pushing his shaft against his lower belly to give you better access. Your eyes never abandoned his as your saliva covered his soft ball sacks.

This time he did step back, and you let him.

“I need you inside me, please”, you murmured.

His jaw was so tight he didn’t dare to speak. Joel could feel his heartbeat on his cock, all because of you and your wanton mouth. You looked so damn beautiful ― on your knees, staring at him through your eyelashes, patiently waiting. He knew you very well by now, fully conscious that as sweet as you were acting now, that was it ― an act. And he loved every bit of it. He liked the way you replied to him when sex wasn’t involved, taking no shit from anyone, your snarky remarks driving him crazy.

Joel sat down on the rock and motioned for you to join him on his lap. You joyfully obliged, sitting atop of him. Your knees to each side of his waist, your bust against his, skin to skin. Your nipples grazed his chest, becoming harder at the electric contact. He cupped both of your boobs and pushed them up, so he could kiss them tenderly. You sighed, your mouth against his ear. Still holding your breasts, he unattached his lips from your nipples to peck your chin.

“Fuck me, darlin’”.

You looked down between you two. His erection was so prominent you knew it was hurting him. And you could ease that pain for him. Heaving, you lifted your hips up and grabbed his dick. It was hard but soft at the same time, velvety, very warm and beating. So sensitive to the touch he groaned ― music to your ears. You hugged his neck with your free arm as you guided his tip to your leaking entrance.

With a sudden drop of your hips, you impaled yourself harshly ― his bollocks kissing your tumid lips. You circled your hips against his, very slowly, which made you both moan in unison. Then you raised your body, his cock slipping out completely. Holding him from the base, you came down on him sharply again.

Joel was close to losing his mind. If you did that one more time, he wasn’t going to be able to hold it for much longer. You seemed to understand that, because you started to rock your hips back and forth, up and down. He kneaded your ass, feeling your rhythm, spurring you on. His fingers squeezed the skin under them while he kissed your collarbone. His mind was completely blank ― he could only focus on your sweet pussy hugging him, choking him. His dick felt so wet, so hot, throbbing for release… You kept on riding him, your movements growing erratic as you both were close to climax.

You surrounded Joel’s neck with both arms, pressing your breasts against his handsome face, your hips flushed with his, as your cunt angrily convulsed around his erection in blissful liberation. Joel held it together while you recovered, his hands still on your ass cheeks, fingers so clutched they were close to dislocating.

“Baby, if you don’t get off, I’m―”, pain smeared his tone. He was really fighting for his life right there and then.

“Oh, sorry”, you said with a small voice, still feeling your own pleasure. You elevated your hips, so his manhood popped out with a squelching sound.

You were not going to leave him hanging, obviously. So you kneeled before him, in between his strong legs, and kissed his tip. Joel sighed loudly when you closed off your lips around him for the second time today and pumped his shaft fast and strong, milking him dry. A minute later, your throat was clogged with his spent. A drop of it trickled down the corner of your mouth.

Joel leaned forward and caught the cum off the corner of your mouth with his thumb before rubbing it on your lips. Then he kissed you wetly, devouring you. He could never have enough of you.

“Thank you, sir”, you whispered with a smile when he was done assaulting your mouth.

He just smiled back. A genuine smile, the first you had seen from him. It tugged at your heart a little.

You were still feeling restless. Although you had orgasmed four times already, your pussy lips were so inflamed you thought you were on your way down to hell. Still on your knees in front of him, you softly massaged your sensitive clit. It was burning ― you suppressed a sob as you glanced up at him, lips slightly parted.

“What is it? Is your tight pussy still gushing, sweetheart?”, he asked you, cupping your chin.

You nodded, tears of frustration blurring your vision.

“I need more, I can’t ― my pussy is on fire, sir”, you muttered, feeling sorry for yourself. You were in a heightened state of sensory overload.

“Let me help you with that then”, you almost cried of relief at his words.

You quickly got up and kneeled on top of his lap again. He slipped a hand in between your bodies to caress your core. Your flesh trembled at the touch. Suddenly you realised you desperately needed to find your own rhythm ― you didn’t have to communicate it, Joel understood it in a second. He stopped and let you do what you had to do. You placed the palm of your hands on his shoulders and started rubbing your pussy against the side of his still hand. You slid your cunt further up to his elbow, and then returned back to his wrist. Your clit greedily welcomed the tingling sensation of the hair on his forearm against your wet slit.

You kept on rocking your hips back and forth on his forearm, pressing hard against it, sliding, rubbing and causing as much friction as you could, the heat in your belly flowing down to your crotch. You buried your fingers in his wet hair and tilted his head backwards so you could rest your forehead against his. Your inner walls contracted extremely hard and then you let go, squirting plentifully for a few never-ending seconds on Joel’s forearm. Your overstimulated cunt was leaking on top of him as if someone had opened the tap of your pleasure and couldn’t close it. When the last wave of your climax abandoned you, you looked down to see how it all trickled down from his forearm onto his lap.

You closed your eyes, content, when he gently tapped your pussy a few times. You breathed in deeply, feeling completely satisfied, finally at peace. Then you pecked his lips with gratitude.

“Better now, baby?”.

“Yes, infinitely better. I―I’m sorry I made a mess”.

“Don’t you apologise for that”.

You both remained in that position for a few minutes ― his now relaxed, wet cock warmly lodged between the flaps of your still dribbling cunt. He hugged your waist to bring you closer to him, his mouth brushing yours in a moment of calmness you had not experienced with him yet.

When his lips released yours, you placed your cheek against his right shoulder, your fingertips tracing the scar on it. Silence ensued, neither of you felt the need to fill it with words.

As much as you fought against yourself, you had feelings for Joel. Although you probably didn’t know all his faces, you knew enough about him to love him. The way he would have you on your tiptoes with his sarcastic comments, his bluntness, his rudeness, the way he would snap back at you when you pressed his buttons ― but also his kindness, his caring side, his softness, how he worried about you making sure you were okay, his demanding sexual needs, the way he made you feel when his hands mapped out your skin.

But you were not sure what he thought about all of this. In some respects, his mind was inscrutable. It was part of his charming personality, you guessed. You kissed the scar on his shoulder as he buried his face in your hair, inhaling your scent.

“I love how you smell”, he murmured.

“Is that the only thing you love about me?”, you couldn’t resist, the words just slipped out of your mouth. You wished you could take them back, but it was too late for that.

Joel slightly froze in place at your question. He couldn’t deny that he had started to develop feelings for you. The way you looked at him made him want to be a better person. Although you drove him crazy sometimes, you made his days bearable, a shining beautiful light amongst so much darkness. You were his lighthouse, guiding him to shore. He just needed to learn how to surf through the violent waves before he could safely approach the coast.

Knowing how close he had been to losing you had opened his eyes to a new, unknown reality. He would literally kill for you if he had to ― he had already done it and would do it all over again without blinking. No regrets whatsoever.

But he had some unresolved trust issues when it came to romantic relationships. Joel married Sarah’s mother, Charlotte, when they were both twenty-one years old, as soon as they knew they were expecting. The first two years were very hard on them both, parenthood was not a piece of cake. Resentment had grown between them, to the point where Charlotte had accused him of robbing her of her fun years, which led her to cheat on him. They tried to salvage their marriage for the sake of Sarah, but they never did ― Charlotte died in a car accident while on a heated, angry phone call with Joel.

He locked away those thoughts ― it wasn’t the time nor the place to dwell on the past. Not when he had you with him.

“I… well, no. I love everything about you, sweetheart”, he conceded.

Your heart skipped a beat with joy. No, it wasn’t a love confession, but it was much more than what you were expecting of him. You turned your face against his neck and placed a kiss on his Adam’s apple.

“C’mon, let’s freshen up, I want to clean my mess off you, I do feel a bit bad”, you said with a chuckle.

You got off his lap, the cool breeze touching your sweaty skin. You offered him a hand, which he took, standing up behind you. Without letting go of his fingers interlaced with yours, you guided him to the water. It was cold, but you ventured inside with Joel following you. When the level was up to your waist, you turned around in Joel’s embrace.

You proceeded to wash off your cum and his off his cock, his lap, his forearm. When you were done, he kissed the top of your head. His left hand did the same to you, his fingers caressing your pussy, cleaning the proof of your shared pleasure. He did so not in a sexual way, but in a caring, intimate way. A minute later, you both disappeared beneath the water to emerge a second later, to wash off all the sweat. You found yourself in his arms again, your cheek against his chest ― you could hear his heart beating loudly but steadily.

“Joel, I―”, you didn’t know where to start. There were thoughts you had been wanting to put into words for a while now. “What happened to me sucks and I still die a bit inside when the memories come back at night. But none of it was your fault, nor mine. I do not want those bastards to win, to ruin my life. And my life with you. And I know it will take time to heal that part of me, or maybe it will never heal, but that doesn’t mean that I don’t want you. I want you so badly, Joel, but what I do not want is you walking on eggshells around me. I’m not broken, I want to move forward, not get stuck in the past. Do you understand what I mean?”, you asked, your cheek still against his chest, looking up at him.

His eyes were focused on yours. His heart shrunk a bit, sharing your pain. If he could, he would take it away, all of it ― the fear, the panic attacks, the agony, the memories, the nightmares. But he couldn’t change the past. So, he nodded.

“I do, honey”, he whispered as he bowed down to place a gentle kiss on your lips.

You both stood there for a few more minutes, hugging each other in silence. Then Joel grumpily ended the embrace.

“We should get back, Tommy is going to kill us”.

You laughed because it was so true. You both got out of the lake, towelled down and got dressed. You started walking towards the campsite besides him ― your hand in his, fingers entangled. When you saw the tent and Tommy’s outline against the fire, you got ready to release his hand. But he didn’t let go when Tommy turned around to look at both of you.

You tried to hide a soft smile ― and failed.

The younger Miller noticed you holding hands but made no comment about it. But he did smile. A very wide smile.

“Well, about damn time, dinner is almost ready”, he said with amusement, pointing to the rabbit impaled with a stick roasting on top of the fire. “If you took any longer, the rabbit was going to come back to life and run away”.

“Always so theatrical, Tommy”, you chuckled.

[absolutebl]

This Week in BL - The Summer Games BLgin.

Organized, in each category, with ones I'm enjoying most at the top. Those Greeks did have that reputation for naked dudes rolling around together so I'm declaring it...

BL OLYMPICS!

I'll be passing out metals in various sporting events, as part of the weekly updates through mid August, just for funzies.

July 2024 Week 4

Ongoing Series - Thai

The Rebound (Weds Gaga) eps 9-10 of 12 - I guess mass murder is nothing next to having to raise funds for your basketball club. There were a lot of water sports in these eps (no not that kind). I’m not complaining. The street BB playoffs were fun. Frank is GOOD. I didn’t know he played. They aren’t using doubles for this. Meanwhile, it’s a bummer this one can’t be a poly romance. 

Winner!

Gold in Handball

for that shower scene in ep 9 (also... ya know, DUNK TANKS)

Balls in hands of all types.

Briefly must chat about that intro/outro music. It's like Thai autotuned Stray Kids. Which means I kinda adore it.

Century of Love (Weds Gaga) eps 5-6 of 10 - I guess he’s had a long time to learn how to fight really really well. This is a fun show. It does occasionally feel like a bunch of gay boys playing dress up. I LIKE P’Third a lot. I hope he doesn’t turn out to be an actual baddie. I’m finding the music a little intrusive in these episodes. I love the deconstructed suits look, and the velvet blazer. Very 90s. The confessions scene was very cute. It’s a good thing Vee is so easy-going, because the last few months of his life have been truly insane. And now he’s queen of the castle? Still working his convenience store job?

I honestly thought we'd just get kisses halfway through not a full on sex scene. But it was very sweet and tender. Appreciated, boys, thanks. However it’s never a good sign when the sex scene is it at the halfway point, it just means there’s gonna be a lot of trauma to come.

(I gotta say every time Daou smiles he actually looks his age.) 

This Love Doesn't Have Long Beans (Fri iQIYI) ep 4 of 8 - I like them now. I mean as a pair of characters. I wasn’t really sold on the main couple until this episode, and now I’m interested (yes I am shallow). The boy with the glasses is definitely sus. I’m quite drunk, thus I have to say Sailub is the hottest thing on my screen right now. Metas's taste in interior design sucks. OK, that physical therapy session was sexy. I wasn’t sold at first, but now I love this side couple too.

Argh. SailubPon kiss so well. Also COUNTER LIFT!!!! 

Silver in Weightlifting

Sunset X Vibes (Sat iQIYI) ep 7 of 12 - I’m the one who always says this stuff, but this pair might be the best at relationship heat. Let me try to explain. They are good at putting on screen the kind of NRE, want to bone, just really into each other physically and also connected and loving. It’s the way their bodies always arch towards each other. They’re very comfortable in each other’s space in a way that’s really rare to see out of Any BL country but Taiwan. I think they might be my favorite couple currently active. I don’t know how to put it except that

it looks like they want each other,

it looks like they like each other,

it looks like they’re into each other,

and it looks like they GET each other.

It’s nice to see on screen. The plots/stories/narratives that they're given aren’t doing them any favors, but man they’re a good pair. Meanwhile, was I screaming the whole time don’t rip the sample of the custom piece? Yes I was. But it was still sexy.

Sam getting discovered was fun! Yo is gonna burn his arse good.

My Love Mix-Up Th (Fri YT) ep 8 of 12 - Okay! Officially boyfriends. I almost like the friendship btw Atom and Mudmee better than the romances. But they all so cute. 

The Trainee (Sun YouTube) ep 4 of 12 - I hate the gf intern so much. I think she is past redemption now - time for death. What is it they say about ADs? they do all the work, for none of the credit but all of the blame.

Knock Knock Boys (Thurs Gaga) ep 10 of 12 - I guess Peak’s dad really is that awful. Jane is the beard? Got it. The show got suddenly quite sweet and complex. Where did that come from? Meanwhile ,Almond + Latte + sex education is awesome. Great trope we rarely get in BL. 

Love Sea (Sun iQIYI) ep 7 of 10 - Look, what’s really annoying me is that I am neither upset nor pleased with the show. I like to be driven one way or the other by Meme. Trash watch here. (delayed this week, I can't face it)

I Saw You in My Dream (Weds Gaga) ep 1-2 of 12 - Out the gate I don’t like it. I don’t really like the teasing thing and the acting is poor. That said, neck kisses in the very first episode do make me happy. So I’m gonna keep watching. As for ep 2, I like the sides, and we have gay brothers trope activated. I also like the paranormal element, it adds some much-needed tension, but it is still a little slow (typical of a pulp).

Ongoing Series - Not Thai

I Hear the Sunspot AKA Hidamari ga Kikoeru (Japan Weds Gaga) ep 6 of 10 - I like our poor lost puppy slowly figuring out what’s going on. It’s so elegantly done. Also, the the boy begs his quiet seme to SAY something, you know he’s gonna DO something instead. 

I could have done wihtout the pan around the head kiss. We over that, 8 years ago.

Takara's Treasure AKA Takara No Vidro (Japan Mon Gaga) ep 4 of 10 - Why don’t I like this show? I had to think about it quite a bit. It’s the power differential. I never enjoy it when the character with less power is the one doing the pursuing, it comes off as too desperate or something. In this case he is: from the country, poor, and younger, It just makes Takara’s dismissive attitude and snobbery unpleasant to watch. Also, you know me, =/= obsessive stalker behavior. 

It's airing but...

Bad Guy (Korea YT) - yeah, erm, no thank you.

4 Minutes (Thai Netflix/Grey) ep... - Great, a rich boy studying business at uni, suddenly gains the supernatural power to see four minutes into the future. I try to catch up next week.

I have a source, but I simply didn’t have time to watch it. So sorry. Too much traveling too much BL to keep up with. A perfect conflation of conflicting priorities.

Meet You at the Blossom (China) - it's your funeral (or, more likely, one of the main characters'). You can argue but... statistics. You know my feelings on this matter. MY BLOG, remember?

64.media.tumblr.com

In case you missed it

The Time of Fever AKA Unintentional Love Story 2 (Korea movie) trailer IS COMING IN SEPTEMBER!!!!

Next Week Looks Like This:

Upcoming BLs for 2024 are listed here. This list is not kept updated, so please leave a comment if you know something new or RP with additions.

Coming Up Next!

7/29 Battle of the Writers (Thai ????) - trailer here, TutorYim return, and while I adore them, I really hope this is better than Middleman's Love. Won't be hard. However: the premise? Ugh. Something something authors fighting - save me. Why don't writers understand that nothing is more boring than writers?

8/4 Sugar Dog Life (Japan Sun ????) 10 eps - OMG a uni student who looks too young and a... COP. GAH. The subversion and kink of it all. Please Gaga pick this one up? They made it for US.

8/7 Cosmetic Playlover (Japan Weds ????) 8 eps - office romance around the makeup counter featuring a younger seme and sex by blackmail. I am intrigued. DFTUJ (don't fuck this up, Japan).

8/8 Monster Next Door (Thai Thurs WeTV ) 12 eps - I am so DAMN excited to see Big finally lead a BL. I can't even with this, one of my most anticipated of this year. He's a great kisser ya'll, he's kissed a lot of boys as second lead. I can't WAIT.

8/12 First Note Of Love (Taiwan Mon Gaga) 12 eps - About a singer with stage fright and his timid fan stars Charles (H4 the puppy one) and Michael Chang (the youngster in My Tooth Your Love), plus side couple featuring a Thai actor Jame (Koh in Gen Y) and Liu Min Ting (of Guardian fame). What a damn tean. I can't wait. With thier powers combined!

8/16 The Last Time (Thai Fri YT) ? eps - Convoluted story of loss and possible reincarnation or something.

8/22 The Paradise of Thorns (Thai movie) theater release - Jeff Satur is back but this does not look like a BL (the gay lover's death is the inciting event). More in Goodbye Mother vein. Looks dark and dramatic. He opposite and extremely well known actor Toey Pongsakorn who has never done gay before.

Addicted Heroin (Thailand adaptation) is also supposed to release this month. GIVE IT TOO MEEEEEE. I don't care about anything else but August back on my screen. It's been almost a decade since he did BL.

THIS WEEK’S BEST MOMENTS

This week's adventures in caption "out of" and "off" are not the same thing. This is an uncomfortable thought.

I'm so tired I'm seeing double. This is all you get.

(Last week)

Streaming services are listed by how I (usually) watch, which is with a USA based IP, and often offset by a day because time zones are a pain.

The tag BLigade: @doorajar @solitaryandwandering @my-rose-tinted-glasses @babymbbatinygirl @babymbbatinygirl @isisanna-blog @mmastertheone @pickletrip @aliceisathome @urikawa-miyuki @tokillamonger @sunflower-positiiivity @rocketturtle4 @blglplus @anythinggoesintheshire @everlightly @renafire @mestizashinrin @bl-bam-beyond @small-dark-and-delicious @saezurumurmurs

Sigh, Tumblr in it's infinite wisdom doesn't like too many tags.

Sports in Play (the jokes write themselves) )

Boxing

Breaking

(That's Not) Cricket

Diving (yes, for that)

Fencing (yes, with those)

Handball (exactly what it says, no, read the word.. again)

Rhythmic Gymnastics (obvs)

Squash (snicker)

Surfing

Swimming

Trampoline

Weightlifting

Wrestling

[heizuhaevents]

HeiZuha-Week 2024

August 5th until August 11th!

Welcome to this year’s HeiZuha-Week, where we want to come together and create one or more special pieces about our favorite (to-be) couple!

You like the couple Kazuha and Heiji? Then you're at the right place!

As every year, the HeiZuha-Week will again include the Hattori-Day (August 10th)!

Around that time, our beloved Osakan Couple will return with a new case in the Japanese Manga-Series, so I decided on the theme

Reunion / Return

To give you some prompts, here’s the daily list!

Case Closure: Heiji returns to Osaka, after successfully solving a case in another city. Kazuha, who was worried during his abscence, waits for him. Ideas: dangerous case, lost case, dispute, argument, long-distance relationship

School Commitments: Because of commitments at school, Kazuha and Heiji haven’t had much time with each other. Finally, all commitments are over and they find a quiet moment. Ideas: school festival, tournaments, exams

Lost: Kazuha and/or Heiji get lost on a trip. After hours of searching, they find each other again. Ideas: Woods/Forest, dangerous case, big city, crowded place, snowstorm, school trip

Dangerous Situation: Kazuha/Heiji gets kidnapped/trapped in a dangerous situation (can be also funny dangerous, like accidentally trapped in the girl's changing room?) and the other has to come to the rescue! Will they be there in time? Ideas: kidnapping, accident, crash, trapped, captious situation

Old Friends: Years have passed and still no couple – even worse! They have lost sight of each other over the years (or maybe have fallen out?) ! Are they worried, the other half might have found a love? Ideas: Study abroad, working abroad, new old love, undercover mission, unsent letters, old memories, long-distance relationship

Another Life: In another life they find/found each other again. Will they recognize each other? Will things be different? Ideas: Isekai, Afterlife, Reincarnation, Past Lifes, Alternate Universes, timetravel/changing past

Returning Memories: May it be because of years passed or lost memory.. They remember old times and relive old feelings. What might their older self think about themselves? Ideas: Photos, lost memory, nostalgia

You can stick to the daily prompts or do an overall work for the whole week by using just the theme or combine different prompts as you like 🙂

It’s free for your interpretation but you can send an ask if you need some inspirational hints (^_^)

I hope for a lot of enjoyable creations!

More Info below the cut!

Some Guidelines

Use tag #HeiZuhaWeek2024 and/or #HeiZuhaWeek and tag this blog by using @heizuhaevents so I can find your entry(s)!

Post your work to the Ao3-Collection (if uploaded to Ao3)

You don't need to participate daily, just choose the topics you like or only use the overall theme to create a piece!

You're free to choose what you want to create! All kind of fanwork is appreciated, open to all creators of all skills! (^_^)

Follow this blog to not miss any of the creations or infos and updates on the event!

Spread the Word! (e.g. by reblogging this post) So we can gather a lot of participants to make this event a great experience! (^o^)/)

Have fun!

I'll reblog on this blog all creations. (^_~) Also after the event week.

(I'll reblog this announcement over the next weeks again as a reminder, but wanted to give enough time for everyone who's short on it!)

[silverstonesainz-archive]

favorite fics & other good things ↳ my guilty pleasure reads, social media edits, & favorite people

wanted to compile a list of all my favorite reads, in case yall needed something new to look at. (but also if you follow me, you probably follow all my favs and see all their works anyways). this also a cute little post to show appreciation to my fellow writers/creators on here bc...... it's kind of rough out here and i just wanna give a little love. making this also made me realize i read fics from the same rotation of people so if you have fic recs, do send them my way! but without further ado, here we go!

+ long fics

the devil in disguise by @ricc3rodeo [daniel ricciardo x fem!oc] this can't come as shock to yall. if you haven't read this series then you need to RIGHT now. q is a true & honest to god wench for this series but i love it so much. and i love sam so much. and i love HER so much

moonlight by @vamossainz55 [carlos sainz x fem!reader] another great carlos fic & im not just saying that bc i love niks. the plot is CHEF'S KISS so pls read it is 10/10. (note: the link is to the latest chapter, not a masterlist!)

dogs of war by @schuvries [charles leclerc x fem!reader] spirit is by far one of my favorite writers and people on this hellsite. she has such a way with words and i wanna be here when i grow up. read any and all her works you will never be disappointed.

august rush by @harley-sunday [carlos sainz x fem!reader] the softness, the domesticity, the friends to lovers. so fucking good. easily my favorite fics on this sight.

+ one-shots

to live a lifetime with you by @formulabear [charles leclerc x fem!reader] i remember reading this and feeling every ounce of emotion from it. so good. if you haven't read this then you need to right freaking NOW.

listen up / my dear by @oyesmendes [daniel ricciardo x fem!reader] this one made me feel warm and fuzzy inside. gotta love me some danny ric!!!

though i have to travel far, remember me by schuvries [daniel ricciardo x gn!reader] spirit absolutely tore me apart with this one. ripped me to shreds. so fucking good.

said something stupid, instead of 'i love you.' by @absolutelynotmate [charles leclerc x fem!reader] 27k words of delectable writing. take a seat, drink some coffee, & enjoy the ride of emotions this fic brings

brought me here by @leclsrc [carlos sainz x fem!reader] auds is the only person who can make me cry over oranges. this makes me so ill (but in the best way) and makes me fall for carlos even more.

has yet to pass by leclsrc [carlos sainz x fem!reader] the angsty?? the slow burn?? the ending. you have to read it. HAVE TO.

the 1 by @lxclerc [daniel ricciardo x fem!reader] i think of this fic often. this also tore me to shred in the best way. lex is also one of the best writes yall should read her entire masterlist actually.

+ blurbs

snowflakes by absolutelynotmate [carlos sainz] wanna be in the snow with carlos :(

carousel by absolutelynotmate [carlos sainz] i also want to have his baby

overly sincere by leclsrc [charles leclerc] auds is sick for this one

yellow? by schuvries [carlos sainz] the idea of carlos calling me his "hielo" makes me rabid

frosting by @diorleclerc [carlos sainz / 18+] this... this makes me feral. i want this.

13:44 by formulabear [carlos sainz] the softness of this makes me want to swallow my pillow. i want this man so bad

mick + choking by @whorekneecentral [mick schumacher / 18+] this isn't a blurb so much as it is a brainrot post but it is important to me i include this on the list. i want mick so so so so bad.

+ social media aus

tiktoked / sneaky by leclsrc [carlos sainz] my guilty pleasure au. fuck this is my dream. actually auds got the texts from my phone(real)

a bet is a bet by absolutelynotmate [charles leclerc] this. chef's kiss. the work put into these aus. fuck my wife is PHENOMENAL.

[veliseraptor]

August Reading Recap

Godkiller and Sunbringer by Hannah Kaner. I enjoyed these both (I mean, clearly, I read the sequel), though the first probably more than the second. The author is doing some interesting things with her world-building, though I have a little bit of a time figuring out what's going on with her naming conventions (which isn't that important, except in the ways it is). I'm definitely curious to see where it goes and will be reading the third one, but ultimately my verdict on this series is more "solid" than "good." Positive! But not, like, enthusiastically recommending to all and sundry.

Chain-Gang All-Stars by Nana Kwame Adjei-Brenyah. This book had the seeds of a good book in it, and it almost lived up to that when it wasn't being unbearably didactic in the most heavy-handed way possible, footnotes and all. When the author focused on the characters and the dynamics between them, I could see a good story there, but it kept getting spoiled for me by being hit over the head with a message that I (admittedly) already agree with. I liked the collection of short stories by the same author much better.

Messalina: Empress, Adulteress, Libertine: The Story of the Most Notorious Woman of the Roman World by Honor Cargill-Martin. This was a solid book but felt like it could've been an article rather than a full-length book. It was a little stretched for what it was, though I appreciated the way the author analyzed primary sources. As always, I am here for an author who recognizes the specific angles of unreliability of Roman histories and works with that to inform their analysis (not just throwing their hands up in defeat but also not taking things at face value). But yeah. Would've been, in my opinion, a better article than a book.

Remnants of Filth vol. 4 by Rou Bao Bu Chi Rou. This book just keeps getting better in a lot of ways. The revelation about Gu Mang's betrayal was a little bit disappointing in some ways but also fun and crunchy in others, and the general storyline is still compelling me. I think I like Meatbun's writing and narrative interests. I have come to this conclusion based on 1.5 novels, though, which is a relatively small sample size. I continue to feel like this is one worth recommending.

The Children of Red Peak by Craig DiLouie. I feel like Craig DiLouie wants his books to be complex and deep horror and falls short of the "complex" part in particular. The funniest part of this book was the part where the sound of a shofar was the ~scary, foreign, sound of unimaginable power~ when I was like. I hear this every year. A guy named Marty blows one.

As you might be able to tell, I was unimpressed.

The Husky and His White Cat Shizun vol. 6 by Rou Bao Bu Chi Rou. One thing I can definitively say for 2ha is that it has the hottest sex of any danmei I've read so far, and this volume definitely delivered on that. We're also moving into the arc that really gets me going so I'm very excited for the next volume and its Revelations; Mo Ran's increasing anxiety is very good for me, even above and beyond the sex.

The Dawn of Everything: A New History of Humanity by David Graeber and David Wengrow. I was so ready to be annoyed by this book, and I was still annoyed by this book in places, but overall I ended up appreciating it far more than I expected to. The counter-narrative it provides feels grounded in evidence and certainly is refreshing in its emphasis on a non-teleological look at history; I think they still fell a little bit into the trap of a glorious past and a fall that they're critiquing but certainly less so than the prevailing story. I want more people I know to read it so I can talk about it, which is also a (generally) positive thing for me to feel about a book; it may not mean I liked it but it does mean it provoked thought.

In the Shadow of the Gods: The Emperor in World History by Dominic Lieven. It's actually been a while since I DNFed a book, but I didn't finish this one. The sentence structure was already bothering me and then there were a couple (relatively) insignificant errors that pushed me the rest of the way over the edge. It seemed like it was going to end up being a relatively basic chronological overview of a number of emperors, however, rather than being more about the emperor as concept or idea, which I would've been more interested in. The fact that he kept comparing emperors to modern CEOs didn't exactly endear me to the book, either.

I'm currently reading To Shape a Dragon's Breath, with The Ratline and The Amazing Adventures of Kavalier and Clay (I promise, @ameliarating!) on the docket next. I wanted to reread The Last Unicorn but then I discovered that my copy has a big ol' chunk taken out of one of the pages, so that was a bummer.

We'll see what else turns up - I have The Spear Cuts Through Water and Dreadful out from the library, so those will probably be proximate reads as well.

[deandoesthingstome]

Walk with Me - Ch 7

Pairing: FBI Agent!Syverson x OFC, Drug Czar!August Walker x OFC

Chapter Summary: This is it. The warehouse and beyond. The end.

Chapter Warnings: I’ll be real honest, I don’t really want to give anything away here. There’s gonna be some more sex if that interests you. (It’ll be outdoors. What?)

Word Count: 5K

Masterlist: For full series Summary and Warnings

Spotify Playlist: If you’ve followed the playlist, you should know what’s new.

A/N: Super grateful shoutout to @dadralt​ for helping me with a few French translations. I put the English at the bottom.

A/N 2: I really really appreciate everyone who has read and commented/reblogged this story. I had ideas when I started and those took on a life of their own. I got stuck a little on the way, but I think I figured it out and I hope you like the wrap up. 

Francesca

It was the hardest thing I ever had to do. While August was busy looking into his associates to root out a mole, I had made myself available for anything, anytime, no questions asked when he got back from Asia. That also meant ignoring Sy and making sure any information he received came through the agency and the agency only. One incredible night in the arms of the man I had once thought would be the only one I’d ever love. That’s all the sanity I had to hold onto.

As I found myself continuing to slip deeper under August’s spell, I also relished the memory of Sy’s arms wrapped around me, holding me close and safe. On my own, I was reckless and wanton. I’m sure it’s what drew Sy, and most men to me originally. But while most men gave up trying to handle the edge after a while, Sy had always somehow found a way to smooth it out. And that edge only grew sharper the longer I was away from him. It drove men crazy when they couldn’t hold on, most opting to let go rather than risk the deep cuts. 

Walter had understood what it took to dull the blade, because he needed a soother too. So while he came to understand he couldn’t offer me respite in his arms, he was there to try to ease every ache I came away with after losing out on love time and again. I envied him for the way he had been able to take each ending as a sign for a new beginning and hold on waiting for what he really needed. I think he could see the damage each heartbreak was doing to me, could tell that the longer I went without a net, the easier it was to embrace fire and danger with no regard for myself. But I don’t think he realized how deep down that hole I was falling. He thought it was just part of the game we played. Instead, this is how I let August in against all my better judgements.

August didn’t fear my sharp edge. He honed it. And until Sy reappeared, I struggled to make sense of why it felt so good to have August keep pushing me, why every time I saw him it felt like I was being forged in his fire. In the haze of the smoke we created together, fueled by drugs and sex and more passion than I’d known in ages, I let myself begin to believe there was a way through that didn’t involve putting him behind bars. Like a fool, I continued to gently broach the subject of just leaving everything behind. I no longer knew if it was still the smokescreen I meant it to be.

I kept Walter appraised, but there had been no new developments from what I had seen. No new security breaches initiated by any number of August’s club girls. No more state secrets passing his way. August apparently had everything he thought he needed to make his next move and he was just looking for the right time. I simply had to wait until Will had the data stripped off the club’s computers and was ready to hand it off. I had been unsuccessful in my previous searches, but Will was a masterful hacker. I just needed the call, but it never came and walking into the warehouse I knew why.

August had figured out Will was CIA. And now I had to hope Will had been able to keep our secret even after everything it was apparent August’s goons had done to him. I couldn’t tell for sure how long he’d been here, but some of the wounds were fresh enough to tell me that while August had been fucking my brains out this afternoon, Will was getting the shit beat out of him. And I hoped his training was just as good as mine and he’d been able to withstand the obvious torture I could see he’d been put through. This was never how this mission was supposed to go.

While August continued to share his credo about not letting anyone hurt him, I rubbed my thumb over the microchip I had pressed against my forefinger. I knew I had what we needed and there was no reason to keep playing this game that had stopped feeling like a game weeks ago. I wanted to rise to my feet, lean in close and whisper to August that we could still run. That I could hide him and maybe we’d be apart for a little while, but in the end I’d be his and he’d be mine and we would be together.

And then I heard the words coming out of his mouth and I knew suddenly how utterly fucked I was. I was about to ruin what was probably the biggest bust of Sy’s life and I was about to end August’s reign. Sy would never forgive me for lying to him and August wouldn’t be around to put me in my place. I’d end up with neither of them. 

Like a specter, the voice drifted through my thoughts.

“We’re in position.”

“Take him.” I fought to keep my eyes open. I would not turn away from this mess I had made.

August had barely stopped speaking, head at tilt and eyebrow raised in query at my words when the bullet hit. I watched him fall and barely registered the second round that took Mateo out. I couldn’t really stop the tears if I wanted to. Everything was in shambles around me. Not only was my partner hanging on by a thread, the man I had come to love in some sort of fucked up fantasy where I believed I could save him was dead.

And I had to somehow explain to Sy why I had let him believe he was ever going to have a shot at taking down August.

I heard sirens and shouts from outside the warehouse. Flashing lights flickered through the doorway each time a new body entered the space. Medics were on the scene and Will was getting the attention he needed when Walter found me sunk to the ground on my knees, resisting the urge to crawl to August and take him in my arms one last time. Doubt crept in, as if I’d made the wrong choice and it took everything I had not to let the bile rise up in my throat.

Walter wrapped an official jacket around me and asked if I was alright. I shook my head slowly and I felt him hold me closer. He knew what was coming. I don’t know how he knew. He never once asked if I was falling for August, but somehow he could tell and he knew what I had just done. He knew I would be in my head about this one for a good long time. Longer than any of the others.

“We just need to finalize the report and record your statement. We can do a video now and then you can go. Okay?” 

I felt his concerned gaze on me and mustered the strength to nod at his question, still amazed how he looked after me after all these years. We were never going to be together, but that didn’t stop us from caring about and wanting only the best for each other.

We set up in a corner of the warehouse, away from the noise of the agents processing the scene. Before he turned the camera on, I dislodged the molar mic I had installed before leaving the hotel earlier and handed it over. I had already sent in encrypted typed reports and the final video interview was just a recount of the last few days that I hadn’t been able to upload yet. I signed every affidavit he put in front of me, half numb with shock. He put me in the cab to the train station with a gentle press of his hand on the small of my back as he bent to whisper in my ear.

“I’ll get him a message along with the rest of the Miami files. He won’t be hung out to dry. He’ll have everything he needs to make the case against the rest of August’s associates. And he’ll know you're on your way to being okay, too.” 

When I looked up at him, I could tell he saw my gratitude, even if I didn’t yet know how to voice it. Even if I still doubted every decision I’d made so far.

“Will?” I managed to whisper.

“Will’s gonna be fine. He has more than a little R&R coming, too. Don’t worry.”

We said a final goodbye and I headed off, ready to try to put this all behind me, starting with a deep detox. I spent weeks in the remote cabin, fully stocked with everything I needed to avoid everyone for as long as I wanted, including a method of emergency contact if things got really bad.

I rocked myself to sleep every night only to enter dreams that turned to nightmares. August leading me down a floral path, only to turn a corner and find myself ensnared in briars and brambles. August preparing a delicious meal only to serve me Will’s head on a platter. August making me come, over and over again, only to find myself ripped apart at the seams. 

I dragged myself out of bed every morning, no matter how badly I wanted to curl up in the sheets and just die. I journaled every day and raged at the papers that held my lovelorn tears, my foolish fantasies and ridiculous notions. At night, I burned them in a fire meant to keep me warm, but every bit of me felt cold and lifeless. I took long swims in the crystalline lake and long walks in the woods and prayed that maybe I’d twist an ankle and fall down the mountainside. I longed to be lost and rid of the torture I felt forever.

I could tell my storm was easing when I awoke one morning with the recollection of August morphing into Sy. When the drugs were finally fully out of my system, I sat quietly by the placid water and put all my pieces back in place. August Walker was a drug kingpin who had put an insane amount of product on the street. August Walker was a murderer, who had put his competition out of business permanently. August Walker was a traitor who had bribed politicians and military brass for national secrets that he planned to sell to the highest bidder. August Walker was a monster.

No amount of fucking was ever going to change those facts.

I pushed the button on the SAT phone and waited for Walter to answer while I practiced the speech over and over in my head.

Syverson

Syverson turned off the ignition of the rental car, peered at the number on the house and checked it against the message from Ramos on his phone. He stepped out and made his way up the narrow path to the front door, gravel crunching under his feet. He stood still at the door and paused before knocking, suddenly unsure if he’d made the right decision. 

“Ah, fuck it,” he muttered and raised his hand to rap on the wood. In the moments of stillness as he waited for a sound from inside, a shuffle of feet, any tell-tale sign that someone would answer, he took several deep breaths and tried to calm his nerves. It would be the first time seeing her again after months with no communication and he hadn’t exactly been invited by the occupants of the house.

“Comment puis-je vous aider?*” the elderly man asked, peering out the entryway with a perplexed look as if trying to recall who might be scheduled to visit today.

“Mr. Malloy? It’s Dean Syverson, from the States. I’m sorry I don’t speak French. I’m friends with your daughter, Frankie, er Francesca. I was told she was here.”

“Papa, c'est qui?**” a voice called from down the hall and Syverson’s heart almost exploded with elation. He took note of the waver in her voice as she appeared next to her father looking radiant in her summer dress and spoke again. “Sy? What are you…?” 

Sy wanted her to burst through the door and wrap her whole body around him so he could slip his arms around her back and hold her close to breath her in. In reality, she froze in place next to her father, though he didn’t imagine the way he saw her stop herself from reaching for him. At the sound of throat clearing, Frankie turned to her father to speak.

“Papa, tu te rappelles de Dean ? Du lycée. À l'époque on l'appelait Sy.***”

Sy watched as the old man seemed to light up with memory and a small smile, then listened to a conversation between father and daughter that he couldn’t understand. Frankie’s father reached out to shake his hand with a wink, then turned to head back into the front room. 

“Wanna take a walk with me?” Frankie asked, motioning down the path. “Or I could invite you in and we could do the pleasantries of small talk over cold lemonade and cookies I baked the other day?”

“You bake?” Sy asked with a chuckle. 

“Been goin’ through all of Mom’s old recipes. It’s therapeutic in more ways than one. And sorry about that. Dad’s kinda given up on English, especially now that she’s passed,” Frankie answered and watched Sy’s face fall a little, eyebrows furrowed and head atilt.

“Well now I’m the one that’s sorry. I didn’t know about your Mom.”

“Thank you. It happened just before my last mission. I hated leaving but I promised him we’d spend time together once I was done with work.” She gave a quick glance back into the house.

Sy heaved a breath in and out. “Let’s walk.” 

He waited for Frankie to close the front door and let her lead the way as they stepped back onto the gravel path and followed it around to the back of the house and down into the large, lush garden where she motioned to a stone bench facing a pond.

“I feel like I know this answer, because I doubt you’d be here if you did, but I have to ask: Do you hate me?” Frankie asked, turning to him with a look of concern on her face. 

“Sugar I could never hate you,” Sy answered immediately without any hesitation. “Couldn’t for the life of me figure out why you shut off all communication and never came back, though. Marshall wasn’t exactly forthcoming either.”

“Did they at least tell you about...? About the case?” Frankie asked, unwilling to voice the name just yet.

“You mean the part where no one was ever gonna let him take the stand?” Frankie nodded at Sy’s question. “Yeah. Said if he had an opportunity to implicate any of the people he’d bribed information from, national security was fucked. Sure. Apparently, all those other traitors had guardian angels sitting on their shoulders. The number of retirement announcements from the military and congress was staggering. Is that why you didn’t come back?”

“Are you asking if it made me sick to my stomach? That August Walker took the fall for all of them? I guess that’s part of it for sure, yeah.”

“Fuck, Sugar. You really were in deep with him.”

“I was blind, Sy. I wasn’t not doing my job but I let a lot of things get in the way of reality and when I found out they were all getting off the hook I couldn’t stomach it anymore.” 

Frankie turned to stare out over the water while Sy took a moment to ponder her words and consider if he really wanted the answer to his next question. It could make all the difference to the end result of his impromptu visit. But if he didn’t ask, he’d never know and if somehow things worked out between them, the possibility would hang over his head forever.

“Did you love him?”

He watched her slow-blink her eyes closed, inhale and let out a deep sigh. He felt the bottom begin to drop from underneath him, afraid now of her answer and what it would mean. He wanted to reach out and grab the words back, stuff them down his throat and never let them out again. He swore to whatever god would listen that if she would just come home with him when this conversation was over, he’d never give August Walker another thought. When she spoke, he almost couldn’t hear her answer, the way the blood from his beating heart rushed passed his ears.

“Not really.” Frankie turned back to Sy and opened her eyes. As her voice trickled through the dense fog of his worry, he could at least see the promise in what she was saying. “For a while I thought I did. It took me time to figure out that I just loved the way he made me feel. Alive and reckless with no one to answer to but someone who only loved me for the person they thought I was.”

“And who are you, Frankie?”

“I’m figuring that out now, Sy. That’s the other part of why I couldn’t come back. I didn’t want to step back into whatever it was we had started again without a better understanding of what my life means now. And what that means for whoever is going to be a part of it.”

“What do you mean ‘whoever’, Sugar?” Sy asked, struggling to hide the emotion her words had stirred within him. He was certain she couldn’t possibly think he wasn’t the one even as he realized how little time they’d actually had together. It killed him to think she might not give him a chance to prove how much he wanted to give her everything.

“I don't want someone afraid of losing me,” Frankie replied.

“I already did. I ain't afraid of it anymore. Just don't want to ever feel it again.” Sy watched her face carefully, searching for any sign that she didn’t understand exactly what he was saying. Just to make sure, he spoke again. “I ain’t looking to change you, Frankie. I ain’t looking to stop you from being whoever you want to be. I just wanna be there with you for as long as I can. If that’s okay.”

“Fuck, where did you come from?” Frankie asked after considering his words and smiled at his comfortable laugh.

“Frankie, it’s always been you for me. Who you are now? She ain’t really all that different from that wildcat I fell in love with twenty years ago. I love every fuckin’ thing about you.” Sy saw the doubt creep on her face. “Yeah, Sugar, all of it. You are a strong, self-aware woman who ain’t afraid to take what she needs. I count myself lucky you ain’t never found someone else interested in all of that and if I don’t get you to let me kiss you right now to show you what I’m talking about, well this whole trip’s probably been for naught.”

Sy lifted a hand to brush his fingers past her shoulder and smooth up the side of her neck, pressing the tips into her nape and applying the gentlest of pressure, waiting for her to make up her mind and lean into him. When she finally did, her lips crashed into his and he felt gravity flip as he grabbed on to her with his other arm and pulled her all the way against him. He slid his hand down to her hip and urged her to lift a leg and spin to straddle him so he could feel her weight and know she was real.

Sy smoothed both hands up her back as he held her close and kissed her deep, parting her lips with his tongue and licking into the space she made for him while she did the same. When he realized he wasn’t going to be able to stop if they kept kissing for much longer, he raised his hands to tangle in her hair and pull her head from his as he cleared his throat and spoke low.

“Sorry, that’s more than I thought I’d get from you at the moment. I doubt your dad or the neighbors wanna see what else I’d like to do to you right now.”

“There are no neighbors nearby, Sy. And Dad doesn’t spend time in the back of the house.”

Sy couldn’t help himself from stiffening at the thought and raised an eyebrow in question. He grew even harder as he watched Frankie bite her bottom lip and nod as she ran her hands down his chest landing at the clasp of his slacks. She unhooked the waistband and slid the zipper down agonizingly slowly before reaching in to grab his aching cock and push his boxers down enough so that he was free and could feel her touch on his burning skin.

He dropped his hands to her thighs, smoothing the thin fabric up her legs and sweeping his fingers over her ass cheeks while she stroked him lazily and bent to return to the kiss. His hands found the strings of her thong and he slipped a thumb under the back so he could grab hold and tug up, applying pressure to her clit. Frankie moaned into his mouth and arched her back into the sensation.

Sy pulled the flimsy material to the side and reached his hand further down and under her ass so he could just feel the wetness as he brushed his fingers against the delicate lips he could barely reach. He only realized how much he was also loving the way her hand squeezed and pulled him when she stopped suddenly and he broke the kiss to see what could be wrong. Instead of disaster, he was met with her mischievous eyes as she wiggled the hand that had previously been making him feel so good under her skirt while her other hand pulled the material back so he could see exactly what she was doing.

He groaned and watched rapt as Frankie slid her fingers inside her underwear and into her cunt. She pressed deep and moved around before she pulled them back out glistening with her own juices. And just like that he was in heaven again as she smeared her slick all over his cock and bent to whisper in his ear.

“Fuck me, Sy.”

“Gladly.” Sy eased her thong to the side down her thigh as she pressed her feet into the earth beneath them to lift up and settle herself back down his length with a luxurious sigh. She had barely engulfed him completely before he began to squeeze his ass to pump his hips into her with fervor.

With her hands on Sy’s shoulders, Frankie used the leverage to lift and lower herself on him in tandem with his thrusts, as he delved deeper and deeper. He felt every squeeze of her walls around him and swallowed her cries of pleasure as the head of his engorged member brushed her cervix again and again. 

Sy wanted to put his hands on her body, on her skin. He thought about lifting her dress up and over her head, but settled on simply wrapping an arm around her waist and sliding the other up her back so he could manipulate her movements to make sure they were both feeling as good as they could. He wanted this to last forever, but seeing her now, hearing her moan above him for the first time in months knowing the last time he saw her he was making her come too caused a rush of sensation to course through his body. He pulled away from their kiss again.

“I ain’t gonna last Sugar, not like this.”

“I need you to hang on a little bit longer, Sy. Please,” Frankie begged him, grinding her hips a few more times before she did the unthinkable. After easing herself off him, she pulled her dress off exactly the way Sy had just wanted to. She dropped it to the grass and then sank to her knees and finally her back with the dress as a makeshift blanket. She reached out for him and he tumbled forward off the bench and between her open legs, pressing a kiss to her lips as he palmed a breast.

His lips moved over her chin and throat as he began to ease his way down her body, pulling her tiny thong along with him and pushing it off her legs. He took a few moments to push his own shoes and pants off as well pull his shirt over his head and now just as naked as Frankie, Sy positioned himself between her legs, shoulders spreading her wide so he could get a good long look at her puffy, pink pussy dripping and waiting for him.

“Not sure I’m gonna last long this way either, but we’ll give it a try,” he teased before putting his mouth on her. He nipped at her clit and rubbed his forefingers along her slit, easing in and out with a tease she whimpered for. When he heard her beg with a “please” he slid his fingers all the way in and licked around them. Sy pumped and pressed the palm of his hand against her mound for a moment before he pulled his hand all the way out and let his tongue do the rest of the work. 

He felt his cock rub against the fabric of her dress as he rutted against the ground and fought to stem the growing pressure.

“So fucking turned on eating you out like this, Frankie,” he groaned into her cunt before returning to the job. Frankie held his head in place, grinding up against him. When she came in a rush of heat and wet, Sy took the opportunity to crawl back up and slip his dick inside her, thrusting and pumping with vigor. He grazed his fingers up the side of her body and then watched as she grabbed his hand and moved it to her throat, pressing just a little.

“Just hold still right there,” she gasped. “Fuck me and I’ll do the rest.”

Sy grunted in pleasure at the thought and did as he was instructed. He felt Frankie lean up into his hand. All the effort it took to keep his hand precisely still for her meant his attention wasn’t on how good she felt around him as he pumped in and out. Where he thought he’d need just a few more strokes, Sy now felt the time slip by as she moved into his hand and back out again, playing with her own breath for him. When he finally felt her tighten around him, he wasn’t prepared for how fast his own release came as well. He was so caught up in the way she maneuvered that he hadn’t noticed the build at all.

They lay naked on the grass next to each other, catching their breath with hands on their chests, waiting until the pounding of their hearts had resided before turning to face one another.

“You sure no one could see us?”

“Would you hate me if I said no?” Frankie teased before leaning over for a kiss to taste herself on his lips. “Kidding. No one can see us. Even if Dad ventured back to the kitchen, where he never likes to go anymore, there are enough trees and bushes in the garden to obscure this view. Our closest neighbors are a couple kilometers away. Your virtue is safe, promise.”

“Funny.” Sy rolled her on her back and kissed her long and deep again before settling along her side, drawing lazy lines along her skin. “You know I didn’t know what to expect when I saw you again. I’m real glad how this has turned out so far.”

“I wasn’t going to leave you in limbo forever, I swear. I just needed to get my head on straight.” Frankie sat up and reached for Sy’s pants, handing them to him and motioning to her own dress below.

“Did I fuck up your timeline?” Sy asked, plucking his shirt off the ground next. He stuck his arms through the sleeves and tucked his thumbs in the neck hole to pull the shirt over his head, elbows wide, before checking around for his shoes.

“I’ll recover, I’m sure.” Frankie slipped the dress back on and did her own sweep of the lawn, looking for her panties.

“I got those, Sugar,” Sy grinned, making a show of tucking the small bundle into his pocket. “Safe keeping till you come back home.”

Frankie reached up to run her fingers through Sy’s hair, brushing a few stray pieces of grass from his locks and let him do the same for her before pulling him in for more kisses. She broke away reluctantly and hooked her arm through his to lead the way back up to the house.

“I honestly haven’t decided when that’ll be, Sy.”

“I’m pretty good at waiting for you if you hadn’t noticed.”

“Or if I ever will.”

Sy stopped short and turned her to him.

“I wondered about that. Not for my own selfish reasons, mind you. But I got to thinking about some of the things you told me over dinner that night. About having a safety net of sorts. This is a nice place.”

“I also told you I liked being useful…but you’re not wrong. It’s been a long time since I took care of myself.”

“Or let someone take care of you?”

“Sy…”

“I ain’t talking about keeping you under wraps, barefoot and pregnant in the kitchen, Sugar. I just mean, you don’t need to go it alone. Look, you are free to make your own decisions about going back to the agency, finding something else to do, or quitting altogether. But I wanna be with you, Frankie. Wherever that is. If you wanna stay here, I’ll let you know right now that if you’ll have me, I’m ready to leave it all behind, too.”

“You’d walk away with me, Sy?”

“I would.“

Translations of the French *,**,**:

* “How can I help you?”

** “Papa, who is it?”

*** “Papa, you remember Dean? From high school. We called him Sy back then.”

Taglists

Everything Henry:  @sillyrabbit81​ @kittenofdoomage​ @mayloma​ @kebabgirl67​ @fvckinghenrycavill​ @geralts-yenn​  @beck07990​  @itsrubberbisquit​ @sweetdreamsofgelato​  @liveoncoffeeandflowersss​   @alexakeyloveloki​ @marantha​ @aireraume​  @angelmather1​ @lizzystuffsthings​  @enchantedbytomandhenry​  @omgkatinka​  @littlefreya​ @avengersfan25​ @thesaucynomad​ @just-chirpin​ @henryownsme

Walk with Me only (I added you if you reblogged or asked and Tumblr would let me): @kingliam2019​ @valacircareads​ @sofiebstar​ @cardierreh15​​ @firstcashheroathlete​​ @ylva-syverson​​ @sunriserose1023​​ @cavilladdict​​ @angreav​​ @ellethespaceunicorn​​ @mis-lil-red​​ @peaches1958​​ @xhoneyxbeex​​ @livisss​​  @hangmanscoming​​

[yenn-reads]

Monthly Series Appreciation - December

It's the end of the year, we're getting closer to the holidays and I will have three stories for you today that I connect with December, Christmas and New Year's Eve.

All of them for different reasons, but all of them all worth reading…

I‘m a little early this month, but it’s for a reason. I want you all to get a look at that wonderful advent calendar in time 🥰

Let me tell you what I have for you this month:

Eyes That See

Sy x reader (💕🔥🌩, status: on-going)

Eyes That See is something very special to me. @just-chirpin not only manages to write one of the most wonderful Sy's I have ever seen. She also makes me feel seen. I can relate to so many things and feelings in this story. And having Sy by my side in this one is just so soothing. It's a really long story and it's not finished yet. But I can promise you that you won't be disappointed if you dive into it. The definition of comfort fic ❤️

And don’t forget to take a look at her masterlist, where you can find many asks with additional scenes or alternative scenarios 😍

179 Crescent Street

(College AU; Mike, Charles, Napoleon, Sherlock, August, Sy, Marshall and Geralt x multiple OFC's)(💕🔥🌩, status: on-going)

Everyone must have seen me talking about Crescent Street's inhabitants by now. I found them one year ago and fell in love with all of them. @raccoon-eyed-rebel gifted this universe of stupid dorks living together in one house to us, and I am so incredibly grateful for that. I read every one of these chapters multiple times and I know I will do it again. Maybe it's my favorite thing in the world 🥰

@raccoon-eyed-rebel also made my New Year's Eve feeling last way into the summer and that's a good thing. Those chapter's are so much fun! Get to know all those guys and, even more important, those wonderful women who are lucky enough to get one (or two) of the boys into their beds.

Sapphire Falls Chronicles

Caleb Syverson x OFC, Chris Evans x OFC (🌩💕, status: completed)

@sapphirefallschronicles was such a cute surprise last December. Every day until Christmas we got an update on the lives of Caleb, Chris, Abigail and Livia. And I loved getting new little bits of that wonderful fluffy story. @keanureevesisbae and @diegos-butt really put a smile on my face with this. I totally plan to re-read that lovely fic this December. Join me?

Hope you find something you enjoy here. Please let the creators of these stories know what you think about it. Reblog, comment, shower them with love. They deserve it!

Monthly Series Appreciation -Masterlist

[jenyifer]

August September LGBTQIA book list.

Now quick disclaimer: I moved during this time. Very stressful. So maybe that’s why I have so many dropped and disliked books. I’m going to give these quick reviews in a specific order of would recommend to mehhh only if you are that type of person. I don’t give spoilers this is just a taste. I am lesbian who is 30 so that also colors my perception of these stories. Only going to include pics of the top 5 to drag you in for easy screenshotting.

Okay Let’s go.

1. Somewhere Beyond the Sea by Tj Klune 🏳️‍🌈👨🏼‍🍼👬🔥🏡⛓️‍💥 okay once again when I take over the world House in the Cerulean Sea and Somewhere Beyond the Sea will be required reading I didn’t think the follow up book to one of the best books in the modern age about feel good found family foster family could get any better. But I was proven wrong. The sequel gives you all you need. You can tell the author felt the pain of our world as he wrote this but the children and characters give those stories life. I cried I laughed. There is nothing quite like it.

2. The Spirit Bares It’s Teeth by Andrew Joseph White 🏳️‍⚧️💕😱🩸👁️🐰 You know what I am putting this one as 2 because despite it making me have countless panic attacks because I’m not fond of… gore? Horror? I adored this book still thinking about it. The romance is 10/10 T4T. I adored the mystery and intrigue. The main character is autistic and very anxiety ridden I can’t describe to you how this book will change you. Although approach with caution.

3. The Disabled Tyrant’s Beloved Pet Fish Vol2. 🏳️‍🌈🐟🤴🏻🤣 mild 🌶️ on a completely different note the “IS THAT MAN IN LOVE WITH A FISH” is a treat that always surprises me with the amount I love it. Maybe I am trash crazy but I find this funny easy to read and in this second book we got even more time with the fish and his prince actually in human shape. The miscommunication trope is strong with this one but so is consent and romance. Idk I just fucking love it. I want the prince to become emperor with his fishy lover haha.

4. The Name Bearer by Natalia Hernandez 💃💐🏳️‍🌈👩‍❤️‍👩💜💜 Okay quick disclaimer here the book is an classic style fantasy journey it is slow. However I really loved how beautifully thought out the universe was it’s a latinx woman forward book. The romance is not the point but it feels very natural which I appreciate. Main character might even be ace spec. There are great side characters. I really love the apprentice wizard but WARRIOR NUNS!!! Hehehe also things seem to be not what they seem which is always cool. I’d definitely suggest this to any fantasy lover.

5. Grandmaster of Demon Cultivation the comic vol 1-3 🏳️‍🌈👬🪄🪦💀🫏necromancer evil wizard is reincarnated into his nephew’s body years after his death. Or is he evil? Or is he 🏳️‍🌈? Hahah yes he is. Anyways in the present he’s finding the consequences of his actions while his…. Love interest is going to make sure nothing happens to this version of him. You slowly get the past. I find the comic is the easiest way to consume this fantasy story. Yes there is anime, book, and a Netflix series and a new Japanese manga is being released but I like this one. 🤷🏻‍♀️

6. Every Heart a Doorway by Seanan McGuire 💜🪦🚪 about a school for those who come back from other universes and long to go back. Main Character is probably ace spec. Very interesting fantasy book for someone who consumed a lot of fantasy as a child. Thought it was also very thoughtful book. I had fun it’s not super surprising or new ground but I enjoyed it for a quick read.

7. Spell Bound by FT Lukens 🏳️‍🌈🐈‍⬛🧙‍♀️🧑‍💻 well it’s YA. Out of the other FT Lukens books I semi enjoyed this one. The characters are still dumb as rocks and the setting could use some more fleshing. But it’s okay. For a fun quick read that semi reminds you of urban fantasy? It’s good. The side ship found family was a little forced but I enjoyed the side characters.

8. Psalm for the wild built 💜🍵🤖🏕️ it’s a chill cozy book for people who are over worked. I’d say if you want scifi it’s not. It’s closer to fantasy. Very short and preachy.

9. Casefile Compendium vol2 by Meatbun 🏳️‍🌈🩸🌶️🚩🔍🐉🥼 Danmei Murder mystery modern times age gap. Does have 2 chapters of non consent and absolutely off the wall opinions about the medical industry.

10. Otherworldly by FT Lukens 🧚‍♂️🏳️‍🌈🥶❄️ YA familiar escapes fairy world finds a skeptical person decides they’ll def fall in love and make a deal. I listened to 50% the characters are intensely idiotic and just…. So so so blind. I couldn’t do it. The skeptic is a person who moved to the city for their family but they do stuff for their family without really caring for them I’m just not buying it. The familiar is infact a psychopath or so low iq he doesn’t care to live or feel or observe anything in 5 years. So so so stupid. Omg.

I had several DNF

I made my parents listen to Ocean’s Echo by Everina Maxwell in my mission to make my parents less homophobic. My mom enjoyed it. My dad said it was way too gay. 😩 man I wish it was way too gay.

What am I reading next? Hummm idk yet. Suggestions are always appreciated!!!

[ayelbee]

MORE THAN LOVE | K. MBAPPÉ | 1

next chapter |

Summary: Sometimes even love is not enough for relationships. But it's fine because you are over it. But getting again in a contact with his younger brother wasn't smart.

TW: slightly coursing , just my really bad writing skills in english so probably even english grammar

Notes: Hey, this is the first time I'm publishing something in english so I'm really sorry for any mistakes I made (english is not my first language), and if you wanna correct me, please do so! I will be glad. Also, i would want to make a series from this, so let me know if i should or if it's really that bad!:)Let me know what are you thinking abou this

----------------------------------------------------------------------------

You let out an exhausted breath the moment you stepped into your apartment. Leaving your luggage on the floor you dragged your body to the living room. You felt more than happy when you ended up on your couch. You have been up since five in the morning, the lack of sleep was clearly visible on you. You were more than happy to be back.

Spending Christmas back at home was great, but there were reasons why you moved to a different country, thousands of kilometers far away from your home town 5 years ago. Some people would call it youthful imprudence, you called it a step that needed to be taken. Since that you have been living your best life, at least most of the time.

You took your phone to text your mum that you had made it to your apartment safely. But when you unlocked it the date in the middle of your screen made you frown.

29th of December

Being in a rush since morning you didn't even have a moment to think about anything else than catching your flight and getting back to Paris. But now, when you were sitting on your couch you started to realize…

It was Ethan's 16th birthday today, your ex's brother whom had you been really close to since the first time you met him as an 11 year old boy. And today he was turning 16. A wave of nostalgia brushed over you. You saw your little brother in him. Every time you missed y/b/n, Ethan was there for you. You could do all the stuff you used to do with your brother with him.

That was the one thing that Kylian loved. Seeing you with his family always made him more than happy. Seeing how you were part of his family.

But you didn't see Ethan since August, the last time you talked with him in person was the day when you were moving out of Kylian's apartment. Ethan had that day tears in his eyes. Well, he wasn't alone… Knowing that person who had loved as his sister was after four years leaving his and his brother's life. If he was younger he would be really angry at Kylian. But he was old enough, and he understood that sometimes is love not enough.

So now you were wondering if you should call him or not. He had texted you on your birthday ten days ago. But you felt like a text from your side wasn't enough. That he deserved more than that. So after minutes of thinking you pressed the green icon and started to call.

"Y/n?" his voice sounded surprised.

"Hey, Ethan." You let out a small laugh "I just wanted to wish you a happy birthday." For some reason, you started nervously playing with your bracelet.

"Thank you, I appreciate it." he was silent for a moment. "I thought that you won't call." His voice tone now changed from cheerful to something more sad, and your heart ached.

"I couldn't forget about you. You are still like my brother Ethan." you stopped for a moment. "Even after all of that." now you sounded like someone who will start to cry at any minute.

"Y/n" he noticed so he tried to change the subject. "You know that we didn't have a Marvel marathon in a long time." He mentioned something you used to do when Kylian was away and you both missed him. You always choose a few movies from the MCU which you have binge watched in one sitting surrounded by your favorite snacks and food that you would order earlier. And if Kyliand had a game that day, you would also watch it together.

"You would want that?" now, you were the one who was surprised.

"Why are you surprised ?" before you even responded he continued. "I miss it." for a second time in a few minutes you wanted to cry. Getting all the flashbacks from the past when the two of you used to hang out.

"Okay Ethan, I'm sorry but I need to go now. I will text you later and we will find a date okay?" now you just wanted to end up that call as soon as possible because you are a coward.

"Sure Y/n, I look forward to it." his voice now sounding happier than before.

"Bye Ethan, and in a meantime you should decide which movies we are gonna watch." you tried to sound also happy.

"Bye." were the last words he said before you ended up your call.

----------------------------------------------------------------------------

You couldn't fall asleep that night, even though you were really tired... Your head was full of thoughts, calling Ethan wasn't a good thing to do, you should just send him a message instead. But you didn't so, in the end, it was just your problem that Ethan's older brother was stuck in your head.

You hated yourself for that. You thought that it was over. That you are over it. But Christmas really messed up with your mind and hearing Ethan's voice too.

It was the first Christmas in four years that you didn't spend with Kylian. Well, you didn't even wish him a happy birthday this year, but he did to you. You just didn't open his message. He also sent your family a Christmas card, making your mum happy and your little brother sad that he didn't come with you. Y/b/n was too young to understand. 

It could be around 3 am when you finally fell asleep. But even in your sleep, you didn't find peace.

----------------------------------------------------------------------------

"I'm home Mon amour." you heard your boyfriend's voice followed by his steps. You were sitting at the dining table with your laptop in front of you as you were booking plane tickets.

"Hey babe." you looked up at him, smiling as you saw his beautiful face. Even after four years of dating, you felt like you just fell in love with him. "How was training?" you asked as he bent down to kiss you on your forehead. You wrapped your hands around his neck, making him bend down even more.

"It was fine." he pulled you up while wrapping his hands around you. And kissing you again.

"What are you doing?" you laughed.

"I just wanna some cuddles." he rested his head on your head, squeezing you more into his hug. You let out a little chuckle.

"Okay but I need to finish booking my tickets first, and then we can cuddle okay?" you put a little kiss on his neck. "And you can change into something more comfortable, while I'm gonna finish this." Kylian pulled away with a little frown on his face.

"What are you booking tickets for?" he asked visibly confused.

"I thought that I would visit my family next week. Summer break started for Y/b/n so I could spend some time with him," you answered.

"But we're playing against Nantes next week." he wasn't smiling now. "And I thought that you are going with me." 

"I really wanted to go with you, but Y/b/n is after next week leaving for training camp. And then I'm flying to NYC with my work so that's the only week when I can see him."

"Since when are you flying to New York?" he looked almost angry like you didn't tell him.

"I told you like a month ago." he nodded with his head like you didn't. "I really did, you just weren't listening." it's not like it would be the first time he didn't listen to you. But you didn't mind, both of your schedules were so full, that sometimes you weren't able to keep everything in your heads. 

"I'm sure you did not, but whatever." he rolled his eyes, while also creating more space between you two. "But we have a game that week, so it's gonna be like what, fifth game in a month that you will miss?" he started to gesture with his hands. You know how much it means to him when you attend to his games, but at the same time, you know that you're doing the best you can.

"Ky, I'm really sorry." you tried to take his hand into yours, but he flinched with his hand away. "It's not like I'm missing your games on purpose. It's just a little bit busier at work and I can't do anything against it." You looked into his eyes. You have known him too well to tell how disappointed he was.

"But you don't need to work. You can stay home with me. You know that money is not our problem." now he put on puppy eyes and bring a conversation to a point that you argued about a few times in the past months.

You loved your job, you were a curator in an art museum. You started to work there as an intern while studying your first year in art major, getting a promotion just in January this year. So of course you didn't wanna give up that now.

"You know that I don't want. What I would do here? Wait for you every day to come back from your training? Following you like a lost puppy for every game? That would not work, we would just lose our minds!" now you were the one who got slightly angry at him. Seeing how his puppy eyes disappeared.

"Bordel de merde Y/n! It's really great to know how much I mean to you! Is it a lot that I'm asking? Having a girlfriend that has a relationship as a priority and not some fucking work? Is it a lot Y/n?! Is it something you can't give me? Even though I would give you the whole world if I could?" he furiously threw up his hands. 

"You know it's not like that Kylian!" you watched him in disbelief.

"Do I?" he turned away and rushed thru the doors. "I'm gonna go to Haikimi." then you just heard the slam of doors. First tear rolling down your cheek.

[rtfics]

Beetlejuice Beetlejuice stars promise "big swing" surprises in the sequel, as Michael Keaton says it's got a "stronger story" than the original.

Beetlejuice fans are expecting a lot from Beetlejuice Beetlejuice, having waited a whopping 36 years for the Tim Burton-directed follow-up. Its cast, fortunately though, are feeling pretty chill about living up to the hype...

In the new issue of Total Film, which hits newsstands on Thursday, August 15, and features the eagerly anticipated sequel on the cover, Michael Keaton – who's back as the titular Ghost with the Most – claims the new film has "a stronger story" than its predecessor, and that "there's more of a connection for the audience in terms of the other characters."

He continues: "There's things in here that I wasn't ready for, that are beyond delightful. Instead of saying, 'I can't wait until this thing shows up,' or, 'I just want this thing called Beetlejuice to go nuts.'"

As it stands, there's very little that's been revealed in the way of plot regarding Beetlejuice 2, but we do know that Winona Ryder's returning character is now the host of a popular medium-based TV series called 'Ghost House with Lydia Deetz' – something her teen daughter Astrid (Jenna Ortega) loathes. That, and the death of Jeffrey Jones' Charles Deetz brings the family back to the location of the first flick, Winter River, Connecticut, and subsequently leads to the reawakening of Keaton's green-haired ghoul.

"I feel very confident that it will match and exceed expectations. It certainly did mine, and mine are way up there," Ryder says. "I literally think every generation can find something in it that they'll really appreciate."

"This movie takes some very big swings," Justin Theroux, who plays Lydia's new fiancé Rory, nods, likening it to watching Willy Wonka’s psychedelic boat ride in the 1971 film. "There's the phantasmagoria and it feels slightly out of control and unhinged. It has that vibe to it. It's clear this movie was not made by taking polls from audiences, and studio notes, and executives going, 'Well, what's the most satisfying act three?' This is 100% like someone opening the front of Tim Burton's head, and letting it dump out onto the screen. It's a fabulous ride for exactly that reason."

Also starring Monica Bellucci, Willem Dafoe, and Catherine O'Hara, Beetlejuice Beetlejuice releases on September 6. You can read more about it, and a whole lot more besides, in the new issue of Total Film when it hits shelves and digital newsstands on Thursday, August 15.

Via TOTAL FILM.

[citrus-cactus]

Citrus' Art Summary 2023!

The year is almost over, so here's my art summary for 2023! I got this template from here. This is my third year in a row being able to populate every month with a finished(/digital) piece (and really, I did a LOT more than what's shown here!), so that feels like something to celebrate!

Technically some of these choices don’t match up with their post dates; I counted some months as “when I was primarily working on them” and some as “when I actually published them,” but the sentiment remains. Like I said, it was a busy year! :)

Some more rambling + links to all featured artwork beneath the cut:

I remember last year I was quite worried about/was actually teetering on the edge of artistic burnout. There were definitely some months during this year that I felt a bit overwhelmed (particularly during the summer, when I was working on a 5-illustration series in a style that was DEFINITELY outside my norm, PLUS a bunch of other stuff), but I also appreciated the stylistic variety, and doing a lot of sketchbook drawings/marginalia that were(/are) just for me, so they never had to be "finished” or even "good." Even though almost everything pictured here is Digimon(/anime) art, I did experiment with a more "realistic" style for the Dracula Daily series (Aug/Sept), as well as trying to relearn the "Disney" style I started drawing in waaaaaaay back in high school, only now with a LOT more understanding of facial structure and anatomy. Largely, this style shake-up has been incredibly freeing (these are still sketchbook-only studies at this point, but I'm planning on some digital illustrations in the Disney style in 2024). I'm sure they still look pretty anime-influenced, and I'm not sure I'll ever truly be able to escape that, but honestly I don't mind; the anime aesthetic IS a part of my preference/style!

Let's see, the prevailing fandoms for what's shown here are Digimon Survive and Adventure 02. I really want to draw more Survive art next year!! Really happy with the collabo between @vidramon and myself (July), and honestly most (if not all) of these pieces. I worked hard, I branched out, I took on some really ambitious projects, and finished a ton of things (looking at you, March! That Knight drawing was a WIP for an entire year, but I finished it instead of abandoning it, which is what usually happens when things sit around that long!). Ultimately, I believe I told (and helped tell!) some great stories through my creative projects and art this year, which is my true goal forever and always.

Honestly I'm happiest with April's drawing. That one was a ton of fun to do, but I would have to work really hard to replicate that coloring style because I don't remember my brushes/settings, ahaha. Sadly this is how it usually goes with coloring for me; I make it up as I go almost every single time, which is why series are so difficult for me. I am nothing if not inconsistent -_-;

I would be remiss to mention that a huge part of my productivity this year was due to setting and tracking monthly goals for myself. I gotta thank everyone on the @campdigimonth server for their help in keeping me organized and motivated throughout the year! I plan on continuing my creative check-in posts in 2024.

Next year, I want to a) make more Survive art (particularly with Survive Week coming up), b) draw some more flippin' gargoyles (CRIIIINGE, but no, cringe is dead, I'mma do what I want!), and c) keep working on my personal project! And I am, once again, thinking about bookbinding. That's a "maybe" for next year as well!

Descriptions and links to the full artwork pictured for each month:

January: Survive Week, Day 5

February: Survive Gang Aromantic Week

March: Knight Unryuuji and Friend

April: “Rose-Tinted” fic illustration

May: Happy Birthday Vi!

June: Happy Birthday Haru Shinkai!

July: Happy 1st Anniversary Survive! (aka BEST SOCK FRIENDS)

August: Dracula, September 13

September: Dracula, September 20

October: Adv 02 Countdown Event, Day 7

November: “Boo!” on the Cob

December: Digimon Secret Santa 2023

[magnorious]

Young Royals Perfectly Understands Frustrating Teenagers

*Spoiler Alert for the whole series*

This Netflix-produced Swedish teen drama just wrapped up its third and final season. It follows the second-in-line to the Swedish throne, Wilhelm “Willie” navigating a fancy boarding school rife with toxic social hierarchies and a crippling addiction to dangerous traditions, while also discovering his sexuality. Suddenly, his older brother dies and he’s now the crown prince, when no one ever expected him to have this responsibility, including himself. His jerk of a cousin records him and his new secret boyfriend being intimate and so ensues three seasons of drama surrounding the chaos of this poor kid being outed to the whole world, and the damage of publicity on his relationships.

*I watched this with subtitles and cannot comment on the quality of any dub.

This show is incredibly frustrating, because its characters are frustrating—because they’re incredibly believably teenagers who stake their entire futures on a high school fling. Willie and his love interest, Simon, are in a constant struggle over Willie’s great expectations as the new crown prince and Simon, of a lower social class, having a great many demands over how he thinks he should be able to live his life.

The characters have a ton of depth and that goes well beyond the two leads. The villain of the show, August, the evil cousin, is a hot mess who can’t do anything right. One that absolutely expects to peak in high school and sail through adulthood on his family’s legacy. He’s also Willie’s spare if he abdicates the throne, a rather unique twist on the prince trope I haven’t seen very often. Willie doesn’t want to be king, but he hates the idea of August on the throne even more, and, if only to spite his cousin, strays way outside of his comfort zone and ignores his own wants and desires to make sure he becomes king.

Other side characters include the dudebro boys of their school, also all dickish aristocrats, the ladies’ side of the school, and Simon’s sister's relationship with these socialites and her awesome best friend, Felice.

—

*spoiler alert again*

These two characters, Willie and Simon, are terrible for each other. Simon is too young and immature to understand and appreciate the demands of being royalty in a modern setting. He gets upset at Willie for all manner of things—that Simon has to watch what he posts on social media, who he talks to, who he takes pictures with, what statements he makes, and his unrealistic expectations of any politician. Every time he gets upset, I understand that he’s 17, but I’m also scowling at my TV thinking, “What exactly did you expect, dating royalty?”

Willie, on the other hand, bends over backwards for this guy and desperately needs to actually attend his therapy sessions instead of angsting over his doomed-to-fail romance. They’re entertaining, but they are so, so stressful to watch, whether it’s their many arguments or whenever they start making out in a public place where they can be caught.

They break up, get back together, break up, get back together. In the 11th hour of season 3, Simon officially breaks it off and I actually cheered. I figured the finale would end with the sick queen’s funeral and Willie reluctantly accepting his birthright.

That did not happen. Instead, Willie and August have a rushed “all’s forgiven” conversation, he abdicates, and runs after Simon to be free of a responsibility he never wanted. On the one hand, yes, he never wanted to be king, that much was clear from the moment he found out he was the new crown prince, but on the other hand—Willie wasn’t the character who needed to change for this relationship to work.

Simon was.

Simon, who argued with him constantly over the conservative nature of the monarchy, for all the stances Willie wasn’t allowed to take because of his rank. Simon could have ended this season either breaking up with him for good, or committing to the responsibility of loving royalty, and the two could have looked to a future of slew of progressive changes once Willie had the authority to enact change as king.

August won’t enact shit. August who, upon telling his friends that he’s the new second-in-line, realizes acutely how miserable he’s about to be for the long rest of his life. I half expected this guy to not survive to the end of the season with how self-destructive he is.

It feels like they had a different direction planned for the finale and someone somewhere cut it down. That, or Netflix's "3 season" rule made no exceptions and they had to rush to the finish line.

—

Overall, they’re frustrating, but they’re also incredibly well-written teenagers. The constant pop/club music over actual score got annoying but it’s an exposure to artists I never listen to. The acting is fantastic across the board, as well, along with the editing and cinematography. The actual plot, up to the finale, was engaging and well thought out, with these two heirs duking it out in a cold war with the entire school caught in the middle.

Maybe I just don’t understand Swedish teenagers. I certainly can’t speak to if this at all reflects the reality of Swedish culture and living under a monarchy. It’s a shame that, in my opinion, it didn’t quite stick the landing with the messages it wanted to send, but the show’s a solid, if stressful watch, and a short one at that.

[violetmina]

Hi! I found your tumblr a few months ago and I fell in love with your writing. It's so immersive and polished and I've had an amazing time reading your stuff. I read your post about the difficulties you're facing lately and I just wanted to wish you the best. This is a bit weird since I'm a faceless stranger on the Internet, but I've been thinking about your situation from time to time. I honestly hope things work out for the best! Good luck <3

Thank you for your kind words, faceless stranger. It means a lot.

I'm doing much better now than I was in August. To make a long story short, it came to light that the person who owned my apartment never intended to sell. Property managers were trying to scare me so they could raise the rent. Rumor is that they have been raising rent on several places, not telling the owners, and pocketing the difference. Rumor also has it that some of these owners have found out and are sueing the property managers.

I moved in with my boyfriend in October, and for the most part, it's been wonderful. He hasn't read Chokehold (and kinda hoping he never asks 🫣) but has read my SPNxBoys one-shot and has been encouraging me to continue to write. He is extremely supportive of my all of my creative and non-creative endeavors. I am still adjusting to living with others, though, and helping with his 3 year old when he has him every couple weeks. So writing has been difficult.

The good news is that I'm finally getting the writing gears back into motion. I have over 1500 words on Chapter 11 for Chokehold after months of staring at a blank document. I intend to have it finished and uploaded by the 1 year anniversary of the first chapter on January 30th. I can't believe it's already been a year! I am also going to try to have the series finished before season 4 of The Boys comes out.

Thank you again for reaching out. I appreciate it. And stay tuned! Chapter 11 will be out soon!

[look-at-the-soul]

The Photoshoot -Part 39

Series master list 2014 , 2015

Cillian Murphy x OC

Sorry! I’m a little behind my usual writing schedule, hoping to get there soon :) I think this part got a bit longer than usual or perhaps it’s we have lots of things happening! (The last part of the story runs towards August, 2015 when they finish filming the movie).

Special thanks to @heidimoreton for the Prague ideas 🔐♥️ and @forgottenpeakywriter for the chapter Anthropoid cover 😍

“Daddy huwgy up, mummy won’t stop kissing me.”

Cillian couldn’t hold the smile while looking at the screen. Scout was probably the most photogenic dog in the world.

He was almost there, almost home.

After being away for a while, all he could think of was hugging his wife, taking his dog to the beach, prepare some pasta for them, have a quiet time.

As the plane landed, he was glad he only brought one small bag, so he wouldn’t waste a lot of time at the airport.

Walking past the crew, he thanked them for their service during the flight, one of the flight attendants offered him an upgrade to first class, but he politely declined it. It was ridiculous to try to get some kind of advantage for his work.

Waiting in line to show his documents, someone tapped him on the shoulder; a man a little bit younger than him.

“Hey mate, didn’t want to bother you during the flight, just wanted to say I’m a big fan, incredible work you make people look at Ireland, you make us proud.”

Cillian gave him an awkward smile, not knowing what to say back.

“Thank you, appreciate that.” Cillian offered his hand to the man, who had another question.

“Any news on Peaky?”

“Ugh I don’t really know… sorry, but stay tuned.”

“Will do, thanks.”

Walking away, he moved the strap of his bag from one shoulder to the other. After all this time, it still felt weird being stopped at the most ordinary places, but at least that man didn’t ask for a photograph.

“Back home Mr. Murphy?” Leonard, his driver asked.

“Yeah, just for a couple of days though.”

Starting the engine, the man drove away.

It had been three long weeks since he saw his wife, he had been very busy filming and Yael had been working really hard on her second photography workshop, after the first one had been a success, now she had the double amount of people signing up. He felt extremely proud of her work and the story behind every photograph she took.

But she had also been alone when there was a mechanic problem with his car while she was using it, luckily the vehicle was parked when the battery died, but she had to deal on her own with the tow and the service, there was nothing he could do for her when he was so far away.

He just wanted to make it home already.

“Scout look! Who’s here?” Yael woke him up after reading Cillian’s text that he was about to arrive.

The black lab immediately tilted his head to the side and stormed to the window, moving behind the curtains, tail wagging in excitement.

“Daddy’s home!” Yael beamed opening the door to stop his cries.

As she opened the door, Scout ran straight to Cillian, lifting himself on his back paws.

Holding his dog with one hand, Cillian passed the other one around her.

“Hello beautiful.” He gave Yael a short peck on the lips while she squeezed his shoulder.

“Hi stranger.” Cillian saw his wife smiling at him, his eyes running down her body, mouth watering.

“Call me when you need to go back Mr. Murphy.” The driver handed her the small carry on bag as Cillian tried to handle Scout’s excitement.

His arm went to the small of her back and his free hand to retrieve his bag from her.

“Did you have a good flight?” Yael asked Cillian with a smile rubbing his back up and down.

“Yeah.” He whistled Scout who got busy near a bush. “But this, was all I really wanted.” He pulled her by the back of her neck for a deeper kiss now that the door was closed behind them.

“I’ve missed you.” She murmured against his lips.

This time around they had been apart longer, the Anthropoid project was different from his previous film; Free Fire, filming lasted only one month and she had been able to visit him more frequently because she could stay in Manchester and schedule shootings there, now that he was in Prague she would have to ask someone to look after Scout and she couldn’t change most of her sessions.

It had been lonely nights and mornings by her own, she only had Scout’s company during Cillian’s absence.

Letting out a deep sigh, he assured his wife he had missed her as well.

“I prepared you the bathtub, in case you want to relax.”

He didn’t want to break away from their hug.

“How about we have dinner first and then we both take that bath?” His eyes sparkled in anticipation.

“Sounds like that’s my kind of night.” Yael sealed the deal with a soft kiss, feeling like an ice cream melting in his arms, satisfied just by seeing his smile.

A couple of minutes later, they were both naked in the bathtub, Yael with her back leaned against his chest, his fingertips running lazily all over her thighs.

He had been telling her about Prague and the last sequence he filmed, they had to delay the next scenes a couple of days since some fans made it to the hotel halls and were looking for Jamie, Luckily he was out for lunch that day and the incident wasn’t something bigger, but the production team decided to take a small break to double the security and move the cast to another hotel, so he was able to go back home for a couple of days while they got that sorted out.

“Oh!” She suddenly said scaring him. “Violet asked us to be godfather and godmother of her baby, Noah.” There was a special sparkle in her eyes, her whole face lighted up as she turned around in the tub.

“Yeah? That’s great news!”

“You think so? I told her of course we accepted, but I also wanted to ask you first.”

Moving away a loose lock of hair from her face, he caressed her cheek. “How’s she doing?”

From one of their endless calls, Cillian knew that Yael’s cousin was going through a tough moment.

It was a thoughtful invitation, he knew they have always been close, growing up as the only girls of both families and close to age, Violet spent a lot of afternoons at Yael’s house while her mother was working. He had heard them talking for long periods of time, his wife was Violet’s confident during the hardest times.

It was exciting for him as well, he didn’t have any godson or goddaughter on his side of the family.

“She says she just wants you know, the small ceremony…” Her fingers found their way to his chest, moving in random patterns over his skin, her lips connected on his jaw. “But I was thinking we could organize them a little family reunion at the cottage, just for the closest family and a few friends?”

Cillian laughed suddenly, a deep, contagious sound. “Which given your family members, includes everyone.”

Wrapping her arms around his neck, she leaned against his body pressing her breasts against his chest. “Sorry that we are a lot of people!”

“Yeah you guys are a lot.” His lips got lost in her collarbone while his fingers found her wet folds under the soapy water.

***

The following day after a quick stop at a café for a small breakfast, they drove to Cork for a family birthday celebration, it was Sienna’s birthday and everybody were headed to the grandparents house.

“What did we get Sienna?” Cillian asked at a stop sign and looked at his wife behind his Raybans.

Yael laughed, she knew the last thing of his worries was the present. “A doll house for her Barbies. It’s adorable!”

“Are you trying to blackmail a little girl with presents?”

Yael gave him a fake displeasure look. “Of course not!”

Taking the steering wheel with one hand, he moved his free one casually to rest it on her thigh.

“Easy cowboy.” Yael stopped his hand from going under her dress.

A mischievous smile appeared on his lips and a deep laugh escaped his mouth, he didn’t even try to hide it.

“Busted.”

“Behave Murphy.” She asked in a playful tone. “We’re going to your parents house.”

“We could sneak into my old bedroom.” Yael blushed at his words but shook her head. “We could be really quiet…”

Arriving at their destination saved her from his fingers going further.

“I could give you a little hint.” She could play the teasing game too.

“Do you like my nails?” Cillian studied her manicured hands, it was a pale lavender color.

His confused expression made her laugh. Why was it related?

“When I was younger, my mum told me my shoes should match my purse…” his confusion grew bigger, but he waited patiently for her explanation. “Now I decided to match my nails with my underwear.”

It took him several minutes to comprehend her statement, enough for Yael to help Scout down from the car and carry the dollhouse inside. And still Cillian didn’t have enough time to recover from it.

“I brought a special guest, hope you don’t mind.” Yael informed Orla and Kathleen as she hugged them, right before Cillian showed up at the door.

“What are you doing here!”

“Uncle Cilly!” Sienna ran straight to his arms.

“When did you arrive?” His mother asked in surprise, looking between her son and Yael.

“Come and see my cake!” Sienna pulled him by the hand twirling in her Snow White dress.

It was an unexpected visit since they all knew he was away filming, but also a lovely surprise and Yael was more than happy with the company.

Since they arrived early, they were able to use Cillian as the official mover, his help was requested to help them rearrange the table for the presents and cake.

“Did you bring your swimsuit auntie?” Sienna asked moving away her bangs.

“I’m afraid the pool is only for the kids.” Yael smiled and adjusted her red ribbon.

“Can I open your present now?” Sienna gave Yael her best puppy eyes.

“Trying to blackmail your aunt?” Cillian appeared behind the girl and started tickling her ribs. Sienna squealed and tried to move away from her uncle but her laugh made it impossible.

“What are you doing here dickhead?” Pad put his sleepy son down to hug his brother.

“Missed ya shithead, that’s why I came.” Cillian patted him on the back so hard that his mother had to intervene.

“Don’t be so rude.” His mother had to intervene.

“Ah, yes because he’s going to break.” Cillian rolled his eyes, his mum was always so protective of Pad.

“Come and help with the grill.” Evan, his brother in law asked.

Sipping on her lemonade, Yael took some chips and lemon, then added some spicy peanuts to her plate.

Orla looked at the food Yael picked and even that she tried to hide it, she chuckled.

“What?”

“Nothing, it’s just a weird mix.”

Yael shuddered. “I used to eat these chips with lemon since I was a girl, I love it!”

Orla made a face, but she said nothing.

“The food is almost ready.” Cillian groaned and took a seat next to his wife, stealing some chips in the process. “Mmm this is good.”

Connor approached him in silence. “What do you got there buddy?” He saw the kid moving his eyes towards his wife and then hiding behind his arm. “You want to say hi to your auntie?”

The kid nodded, and Cillian finally saw the small flower his nephew was hiding between his hands.

“Oh! You want to steal my girlfriend.” He added in a louder voice, turning to see Yael.

“Leave him alone. Hi.” She looked over Cillian’s shoulder.

“Seriously? Flirting with my woman right in front of me?” He added a dramatic sigh and a disappointment look in his face.

“Stop!” Yael blushed and accepted the small flower Connor was giving her. “Thank you! It’s beautiful.”

Leaning down Yael kissed his cheek and laughed out loud when Connor turned red, the other women at the table cheered him.

“You like her?!” Cillian asked in shock.

The child nodded and tried to climb on Yael’s lap.

“Oop, let me help you.” Lifting him up, she crossed one leg over the other as he touched her hair.

“Guess I don’t stand a chance then.” Deflated, he got up and walked back to the grill where his brother in law was preparing the hamburgers.

“Sorry, he can be a little clingy.” Elise, Connor’s mum apologized and tried to get her child, but he shook his head and held onto Yael’s arm.

“It’s alright, I don’t mind.” Yael smiled at Elise while Connor was focused on her bracelets.

As the women at the table complimented the birthday decoration and specially the chefs in charge of the food, Cillian balanced a couple of plates on his arms, walking over to the table.

Looking at her husband, Yael waited until Cillian was close enough to hear her whisper; “I want one.”

“Babe, I just brought you your hamburger, you want anothe-”

Moving her foot a little, she tried to catch his full attention.

“No!” She then moved her head towards the toddler sleeping on her lap. “A baby.” She mouthed with a small pout, beating even Scout’s puppy eyes.

A warm smile spread on his lips, as he watched his nephew with his wife.

“My offer is still on the table,” he arched his eyebrow, “my old room is upstairs…” he added in a flirty tone.

Locking their eyes on each other, the sparkle was ignited. Pure adoration towards the other.

“Think of something to leave early.” Yael suggested running a hand through his hair.

“Oh, why lie? I’m just a horny man.”

Scandalized, Yael tried to cover his mouth, just in time as his mum approached them.

“You’re going to feel your arms numb in a bit, Yael.” Kathleen offered to take her grandson in her arms as he was completely asleep, he was totally relaxed and had warmed up to his aunt in seconds.

As she took the kid inside, to put him in bed, Orla couldn’t keep her thoughts to herself.

“You know I was just like that in the beginning, it’s called the womb’s calling.”

“The what?” Yael squinted her eyes.

“Baby fever, some people call it that way, and then boom, you get pregnant.”

Yael smiled nervously towards her sister in law.

“It happened in my group of friends, first one got pregnant then another and another…” Elise assured them.

“Maybe there’s something in the oven, I mean you were the perfect step mom while it lasted.” Orla added.

Looking at her glass, Yael remembered the time when she prepared to be a good step mom, but it was all taken away from her. “I hope so.” She added quietly.

“No onion, no pickles for you.” Cillian arrived with her food, taking the previous one he left and asked what they were talking about.

“Oh just about the photos I will take of Sienna later.” She hoped her eyes wouldn’t let him know she was lying.

“That’s no surprise, you wouldn’t let the girl have a bad photo.” Leaning in, Cillian kissed his wife’s lips softly.

Quietly, Yael hoped her sister in law was right, so she could get some news like that soon.

———

“Ready man?” Jaime asked after sipping on his coffee.

“Yeah.” He locked his phone and Jaime saw his lock screen of a black dog and a woman in a kitchen.

“Everything alright back home?” He asked, patting Cillian’s shoulder.

Cillian nodded and folded his script. “Yes, it’s just today’s my wife’s birthday and I can’t be there with her.”

“Hey, tell her I said congratulations!”

“I will.”

But Jaime wasn’t known for respecting privacy. “What did you get her?”

“She couldn’t travel, so my sister is taking her for brunch and I flew her parents over, they arrived yesterday.”

“Seriously? No flowers, present…”

“Of course I got her all that.” Cillian chuckled rolling his eyes. His other present wasn’t ready, it would take a couple of weeks since there was a mistake with the color he chose.

At least Yael wasn’t alone on her birthday, and he had another surprise planned for later.

“I know it sucks to be away from home sometimes man.”

As they were requested to a small meeting for the following scenes, Cillian got a photo on his cellphone, bringing a genuine smile to his lips.

“Thank you so much for my presents Cill! It’s almost as if you were right here.”

“I’m glad to know you like them sweetheart.”

“They kept coming during the entire day.”

Cillian picked on the fake newspaper they had on set, he asked Isla to give Yael the small presents he bought during the day, each one with a handwritten note he left the last time he was there. “I wanted to make my wife feel spoiled.” He could imagine her smiling at the other end of the phone. “I hope you have a fabulous day.”

“I am, thank you for all the details you organized for me, you made me feel special.”

“Oh the day is not over yet, there are a couple surprises left for you.”

“More?!” Yael asked in confusion.

Chuckling, Cillian walked behind the cameras and lights. “Go to the basement.”

He heard his wife moving around the house, other voices in the background.

“There’s a black box.” He instructed, listening to the sounds of surprise she was making.

Seconds later, a loud squeal was heard.

“Seriously baby? Thank you!”

“You like it?”

“Are you kidding me? This is the best present ever.” Yael assured him as she read the note.

Photography is the beauty of life captured. All my love, Cillxo.

It was a new Cannon camera, the complete set with different lenses, the new autofocus did a marvelous work, the resolution of this model would make her shots really stand out.

Yael kept thanking him over the phone, unfortunately he had to start filming soon.

“Why don’t you come over, we can celebrate your un-birthday, even if it’s late. I’m about to finish my scenes next week so we can stay and get to know Prague.”

“I’d love that! Can’t believe the movie it’s almost done.”

“Happy birthday again baby, can’t wait to see you, I promise I’ll make it up to you.”

“Cill don’t worry, it’s fine.”

“Have to go, but call me tonight after you come back from dinner.”

“But I’m not going out?”

“Shit… guess your mum didn’t tell you yet.” He felt sorry for messing up the surprise. “Well, your parents are taking to you out to Wilde.”

“Wilde?!!!” She couldn’t believe he planned her birthday dinner at the same restaurant they went the first time she visited him in Ireland. It was a beautiful place.

“Enjoy the rest of the day my love, I’ll call you.”

———

She had been up early since he went to set to film, she was out to watch the sunrise at Charles Bridge, after some time enjoying the view she walked to a local café for some breakfast and then ventured around Prague on her own.

Old Town held magnificent Gothic architecture and sighting, it offered a lot of history and important places, and of course, romance.

Going through the photographs she captured during her stroll, she smiled showing Cillian a small gingerbread shop that looked out of a fairytale.

“Are you sure you don’t want to have some rest?” Yael asked as Cillian adjusted in his seat. The metro was the best option to move around and it wasn’t too crowded.

“I don’t.” He smiled touching her nose.

She knew it was an emotional final shot for Cillian, but he was determined to enjoy their time together. Jump back into his usual self after a demanding role, he was craving his routine.

“You made the reservation for tonight right?” He rolled his neck a bit, thanks to a recommendation he found an incredible place to have dinner for her belated birthday.

Yael shot him a look. “I thought you would do it.” But immediately smiled, suppressing a laugh and smooching him. “Of course I did!”

Cillian tickled his wife playfully as they walked out of the metro, announcing he would get his revenge later.

Stepping into the municipal library, Yael looked around as a kid who walks into the biggest toys store.

“Did you know that the project is called idiom and not the books tower as is usually named?”

He pulled her by the waist as someone was posing for a photograph and Yael was kind of in the middle. Shaking his head, he admired the installation.

“Eight thousand books.” Cillian read the card of facts.

“Oh! It says there’s a mirror at the top and bottom to make it look like it’s infinite.”

“Hmm.” Cillian hummed while Yael went to pop her head by the breach and Cillian took the opportunity to playfully do a little push on his wife’s back.

“FUCK.” Yael got scared and tried to grab onto something, of course Cillian wouldn’t push her, but her scream earned them a couple of looks as he was hugging her.

Cillian had to wipe the tears from the corner of his eyes and cleared his throat as he felt Yael laughing in his arms.

“Now we’re even.”

“Do you want to sleep on the couch tonight?”

Throwing back his head from the laughter, Cillian pulled his wife against his body.

“Damn, I’ll try to earn my side of the bed back then, come on.” Holding her hand, he stopped a taxi.

“Where are we going?”

“It’s a surprise.”

And indeed, it was a surprise when they arrived walking to the famous love lock bridge.

Having a chance to see the spot they heard so much about was something magical, love was palpable. And to think of the million love stories in each lock, made them constantly squeeze their hands or lean against the other.

“This is absolutely beautiful, I’ve no words.”

Kissing her hair, Cillian took his time to reach inside his pocket.

“Let’s add ours.” In his palm Yael found a lock and two small keys. Cillian took the marker from her hand.

“Do you remember our wedding date?” She teased.

“I think you’re sleeping on the couch.” He made a funny face.

Showing the lock to his wife that he not only remembered their wedding date, but also the date they met for the Photoshoot they did together back in March, 2014.

***

Next part

A/N: Ahh! Lots of things happening ☺️ I hope you like this, remember your comments help me to keep going, sorry for the time it took me to update, I’m trying hard to not let this happen.

Lots of love! Mar ♥️

Tag list: @lyarr24 @runnning-outof-time @datewithgianni @cloudofdisney @lespendy @onlydeadcells @peaky-cillian @shelbydelrey @cutecurly-hair @kittycatcait219 @prettylittlehoneyeyesxoxo @alessioayla @esposadomd @queenshelby @heidimoreton @winchestergirl22 @ange-thoughts @the-forest-witchh @sloanexx @babaohhhriley @forgottenpeakywriter @hyperfixationsonshuffle @yrli8 @shaddixlife @gypsy-girl-08 @itsilvermorny @moral-terpitude @stevie75 @paprikabadger @elenavampire21 @mrkdvidal1989

[prinnamon]

@spiderh0rse has been posting some fantastic notes while it makes its way through Freeman's Mind, so i got inspired to do the same for Mind of Ryan today! it's a shorter series, so here's my thoughts on all eight episodes plus extras. was not expecting to sit down and watch it all today but i was overcome by the need to do so. you know how it is.

WIKI

full name: Ryan Harrison Sullivan

date of birth: August 25, 1976

has received HEV training

working in "mechanics & AI development"

EPISODE 1

listening to "Anywhere But Here" from the album The Story Of The Mechanical Man by Behavior at the start of Episode 1, meaning the series must take place after its release in May 2001.

drives to work ("helicopter rides are too expensive," so apparently the employees have to pay out-of-pocket to fly out to the facility)

didn't sleep well the night before. yet another mindverse character who refuses to get good sleep or eat a nice meal

wears his lab coat all the time even outside of work because he thinks it makes him look "cool as fuck" and because it's very comfortable. people think he's weird for this.

he used to live in michigan

one time a raccoon bit into the power lines and this knocked the power out for the entire town he lived in

willing to shrug it off when people start talking like sephiroth in his mentions say concerning shit. very "haha ok whatever you say man"

barney is his roommate. ryan thinks of him as lazy. barney relies on ryan as his alarm but ryan is not above giving the fuck up since barney is a heavy sleeper

excited at the sight of a mechanical keyboard (based)

appreciator of air conditioning. his college (presumably UChicago; see Episode 6.5) had no a/c.

ryan knows barney gets pissed about it when he finds a safety violation like a lack of handrails on a staircase or walkway, but he never reports these violations

just. casually hops over a counter to throw something away in an inaccessible trash can. tells people to get over themselves about it when they react negatively

EPISODE 2

ryan works in sector G as a robotics engineer

wonders if he's "the only young scientist here," so probably either doesn't know Gordon, Felix, Stark, and Ramirez or is only referring to his department

KNOWS COLETTE GREEN. LIKES HER. THINKS SHE'S COOL. (based)

"she is just the right amount of crazy." is a little younger than her

hasn't been late to work often.

could live without his break, but it would suck.

thinks the transit station is "unnecessarily huge"

can get a little mean in a tense situation (calls a guard a "dumbass")

mind goes blank in a crisis ("i just don't even know what to fucking think right now!")

EPISODE 3

his chest hurts when he wakes up. presumably from cpr.

"my brain isn't really registering everything that's happening. i feel like i should be panicking, but i'm not."

hates roaches. does know they're a vital part of the ecosystem and that his hatred is irrational but hates them anyway

"hi, rat."

notices his lab coat is dirty. he's unsure why he's fixated on that when he has bigger problems.

cold and wet and NOT having fun!

illustrated end card shows him holding his flashlight up over his shoulder

EPISODE 4

gets attacked by a headcrab, which presumably gives him the little cut on his right cheek seen in every end card from this episode forward!

uncurious about the aliens. does NOT want to know what they are. just get him outta there

knows everything about the tau cannon. recites facts about it to calm himself down. i think his mental "happy place" is just a rotating 3D model of the tau cannon. which is incredibly real. also he calls it the tau cannon (based)

his plan for today, if he'd actually gotten to work, was to "see if [he] could apply a self-limiter to the alt fire to prevent it from overcharging."

he wishes he was in his lab right now.

his reaction to seeing a dead guard lying next to their equipment is "oh, hey, a bulletproof vest!" and he takes it and puts it on with NO hesitation. he then immediately starts searching the corpse for other useful shit. and this is like. one of the first dead bodies he came across. really just getting right to it. who needs to descend into apathy when you can save time by starting there?

able to recognize that this situation is incredibly fucked-up but not really able to engage with that fact emotionally.

it feels wrong to him to kill the headcrab zombies. he recognizes that they probably used to be his coworkers. after taking out two of them, he resolves not to do it anymore.

EPISODE 5

his black mesa-issued flashlight is a shake-to-charge light.

barnacles are "ceiling tongues."

"man, that thing killed Bob. he was two days from retirement. how could you do that?" i have no idea if he's being serious and he recognized the construction worker who got killed by a barnacle here or if he's making a joke to dispel the horrors—oh. yeah. he flat out says he has no clue who that guy was

his robotics lab is in the biology building! he doesn't understand this, but he also doesn't mind. (Heather's a biologist! maybe he knows her, since they work in close proximity.)

ditches the vest for improved mobility.

chuckles in disbelief after managing an impressive feat of acrobatics

says electrical failures and brief power outages were regular occurrences even before the incident

takes a snickers bar off a dead guard

could go for a pizza right now

can't rule out that the facility's haunted

"what the fuck is that? wait. that reaction is not suitable. allow me to rephrase: AAAAAAAAHHH!" hmm. i see. makes another tally mark on my "Ryan's first instinct in this situation is not to panic, and he only really does so because he thinks it's what a reasonable person would do right now" list

EPISODE 6

lived out of a storage unit for a while when he had no other option. he packed all his stuff in a rented storage unit and hid his bed behind the stacks of boxes. it was always miserably cold in there and he did Not have bedding. being in the drainage canal reminds him of what that was like

acknowledges he may have to fight the headcrab zombies eventually but "just can't stand the idea of beating them to death" because of how violent and brutal it feels

really doesn't wanna leave the guard with the broken leg to die but reluctantly accepts his weapon when he says he's "never gonna make it"

even with a gun, he'd rather run from danger. gotta conserve ammo.

"why is it so difficult to leave the building?!"

impressed that the guy in the control room hacked the announcement system. tried to do so for April Fools last year but failed to bypass the firewall

panics and accidentally kills(?) mister control room by shooting the bullsquid attacking him with a shotgun, sending both the bullsquid and the guy flying out the window. feels really truly quite bad about that.

EPISODE 6.5

ryan went to the university of chicago!

ryan drinks squirt (the grapefruit-flavored soda)

in 1995 he spent $1500 on a giant fucking heavy ass laptop while absolutely not having the money to do so. he regrets nothing. he love computer

EPISODE 7

OH RYAN HAS A CUSTOM 3D MODEL. OKAY. SICK. ANIMATED OPENING.

has a cell phone on him

injured his leg pretty bad when the elevator fell but doesn't seem to have lost consciousness at any point. yeowch!

concerned about how the pain in his ears from firing a gun in a vent is significantly less than the pain earlier from the houndeyes' soundwave. wonders if he's sustained permanent hearing damage.

his tune has changed regarding vents. hated being in the first one he had to crawl into. now they're a nice change of pace, because he at least knows larger enemies can't follow him in and chase him.

barnacles ceiling tongues are now "tongue monsters." he addresses one as Chunky the Tongue Monster.

a little sad/guilty watching as guards fight for their lives and he ascends on an elevator towards the surface. "this whole situation is just so fucked, man. you just kinda have to look after yourself, and if anybody gets hurt or dies, you just have to leave them. damn."

his phone is a Nokia 3300B. it is a thing of beauty.

once he gets high enough to have cell service, he gets a call from Tod Arlen, who's been trying to call him for hours. Ryan says Arlen's "the last person [he] expected a call from."

arlen has already escaped with Kate by this point!

arlen warns ryan that he's heard some black ops chatter and they plan to blow the place up. ryan is silent about this until arlen's like "are you there?" and ryan very calmly/dismissively says "yeah. well don't worry about me, man. im almost at the parking garage so i'll be fine :)"

they make plans to meet at the clayton airport when ryan gets out. (and, over the phone with arlen, ryan does seem pretty confident it's a "when" situation, not an "if.")

ryan seems calm and casual throughout the phone call but lets himself freak out about the gravity of the situation as soon as he hangs up. ("i'm going to fucking die.")

EPISODE 8

the wiki suggests that an eighth episode was in production at one point, but there's no such thing on YouTube unless you count an unlisted video called "Shotgun SFX Test - Mind of Ryan Episode 8"

there's an end card for ep8 showing ryan having survived being shot. i don't believe episode 8 got made. i think the illustration is all there is.

there is a speedpaint of the episode 8 end-card tho!

"STARTING OVER."

"the only way mind of ryan will come back is through the form of a reboot, and i don't know when or if that's going to happen."