#(even though i kinda broke it by deleting all my art lol)

[commonboa]

checking in early with my yearly benny doodles brought to you by doritos & fritos by 100 gecs

[endlessdelirium]

Nothing to see here (or "We can't stop here. This is Bat Country!)

Hello from The Void! How did you get here? Well, I probably liked one of your posts, or I read something you posted that really resonated with me to the point that I broke my silence and actually responded (instead of just lurking like a creepy ghost). Or you're probably like a creepy ghost yourself and saw my username enough times or read one of my comments that made you wonder just who is this moron spouting off all this nonsense? Either way, you thought you'd check out my account and return the favor, or something, I really have no idea why you're here lol.

The thing is, I made this account years ago. I had a couple of irl friends who also had accounts, so I followed them plus a handful of other people from my interests back then. And it was great for awhile, until social media fatigue set in. This was nothing new. There'd be new social media sites that would be trendy for a time, and I'd be curious enough to try it for awhile, until I realize lol I'm not a very social person irl, why would I be better at it online? So I start losing interest until I eventually stop checking in. Even now, I am barely on any social media sites. I keep my Facebook account active because that's pretty much the only way people could get in touch with me if they don't have my number, and I'm on Reddit all the time but I barely post/comment there as well and just mostly lurk (like a creepy, creepy ghost wooohhh. Nah, but seriously, social anxiety is a real bitch!) Other than that, I practically have zero social media presence.

So I'm pretty much done with Tumblr... until Haikyuu dragged me back in. I can't really remember when I entered the fandom, I think I started watching sometime in late 2018 and I've been obsessing ever since. Reading the manga wasn't enough, I wanted more content. The Reddit sub was okay... for awhile. Eventually I wandered back into the wastelands of Twitter and Tumblr, all in my pursuit of extra Haikyuu juice. Yes, there's no point denying it, I'm pretty much an addict at this point. Stop judging me.

The thing is, I'm also incredibly lazy. I didn't see the point of creating new accounts when my old ones are still serviceable. For all intents and purposes, this account is pretty much dead. It's just, sometimes (okay, lots of times) I would scroll through Haikyuu tags and I would find something funny, insightful, pretty, interesting that I just have to like it (or is it hearting something? Sorry, I'm not really well versed in Tumblr lingo anymore) or leave a comment to show my appreciation. Which is all well and good, it's just lately a couple of people have been following my account, which isn't terrible per se, I just find it a bit weird since I haven't posted anything new in years. Really, the only thing I updated was my profile pic, since my account was supposed to be a personal one, and wasn't supposed to be dedicated to just a specific fandom so the pic I originally used was one of my irl head which is just... ick! I don't know what I was thinking. So I changed it because I didn't want to frighten anyone by manifesting my mug in their notifications, and really Hinata's head is infinitely better than my head so it can only be an improvement for my account.

Other than that, I pretty much left everything as is. I didn't have the heart to delete everything. In a way, it's kind of like a time capsule for me, still, I don't really recognize the me who made these posts anymore. I mean, I don't have amnesia or anything. I sorta remember them, but since they were made by a younger version of me, one with different interests and obsessions (I mean still share some of these things with this person, it's just a lot has changed as well, and I've since changed my opinion about some things) there's a sort of detachment as well. Which is why it feels like receiving a jolt of electricity everytime I get a new notification that someone has liked a picture or post. It's like "Huh?", I sort of remember the post, but also not really since it was litterally from years ago made by a younger and more naive me. "Okay, I guess?" is all I can say at the end.

So, what now? I still don't want delete my posts. Even though it kind of weirds me out now, I still like having it as a record. Like "Hey, this was ME! Wasn't I weird? I mean, I'm still weird, but in a slightly different way. Anyway, wasn't I a riot?" I also don't feel like making a new account. I still don't really consider myself active in these parts. I just like scrolling through my tags of interest (like a creepy stalker), liking awesome fan arts, and leaving a comment or two when I couldn't contain myself anymore and I just had to say something. I've also thought about re-blogging things sometimes, but I feel that would tip my account back into a semi-active state, and I don't feel like it just yet. Maybe in the future. For now I kinda like keeping my account as is, as a time capsule when I was still active here.

So, where does that leave you? I still don't really know why you're here, but you're welcome to have a look around. Just remember you're looking at an old account and it would help if you view it like a window to the past. I don't mind if you like anything, just know I only have vague memories of making any of those posts so I can't really discuss any of them now. If you're okay with all of that, then make yourself at home... or not, I'm not the boss of you lol.

Anyway, you're still here? And you read everything? Why? I mean, wow, what a trooper! I gotta reward you with something. You know what, here's a picture of Hinata. Did I draw it? Of course not, don't be silly! I like art, but unfortunately art doesn't like me so I can't draw to save my life. So this here's just regular manga panels of Hinata. But not just any Hinata, it's Third Year Hinata! Why? Why not? I see many itenerations of Hinata on Tumblr including Brazil Hinata, but for some reason I don't see Third Year Hinata get as much love on here. I don't really get it. He is so precious. So here he is!

Bonus: The Duality of Hinata

Thanks for stopping by. Have a nice day!

[purplesurveys]

1245

Serious question, peanut butter or nutella?  Oh you are just mean. Nutella is amazing as a filling or icing, but when it comes down to it I guess I look for peanut butter more often. I love both though.

Do you prefer baked potatoes or mashed potatoes?  Mashed. But baked potatoes are pretty good too; the only reason I didn’t pick it is that I don’t get to have it as often as I do mashed.

What is your oldest sibling’s middle name?  I’m the eldest sibling, but my sister, who comes after me, has Beatrice as her second name if that’s what you mean by middle name.

Do you like breadsticks?  Yes. The more cheesy-garlicky, the better.

What are your favorite things to spend money on?  Merch or food.

Which would you rather have a new puppy or kitten?  Puppy. Not the biggest fan of cats.

How old will you be on your next birthday?  24.

Do you ever feel self-conscious when you eat around other people?  If it’s the combination of having to be around people I’m not too close with, like workmates, and I’m eating something that tends to be messy, like jjajangmyeon, then yeah I can definitely feel conscious.

When you opened your eyes this morning, what were your first thoughts?  I fell asleep from 11 PM to around 3 AM and when I woke up then I thought  “ugh, I fell asleep early again?”

What is one thing in the room you’re in that reminds you of somebody?  My vape pen constantly reminds me of Andi because they were the one who gave it to me.

Could you ever be friends with somebody who was homophobic?  No.

Would you ever want to be a supermodel, or date one?  I did want to be one, at one point. It was all a matter of being stuck with the wrong crowd at the time lol.

Honestly, have you ever made fun of somebody so bad they cried?  Probably with my sister when we were very young.

Honestly, would you rather be complimented on your looks or intelligence?  Intelligence.

Have you ever purchased a pregnancy test, for yourself or otherwise? I never have.

You can get one thing, anything, for free right now. What do you pick? Why?  A 1 or 2 TB hard drive. My phone has reached the stage where I’m starting to have to constantly delete shit so I don’t reach the maximum storage, so I need someplace to dump all my photos and videos in to free up my phone.

Honestly, have you ever danced naked?  Nope.

What was the first illegal thing that you did? Did you get caught? I dunno...buy pirated movies? I didn’t get ‘caught’ since pirated movie stalls are widespread here anyway, so for the most part I’ve always been more concerned for them than I am for myself.

What is the home page on the computer you’re on?  Technically it’s supposed to be the Google home screen, but I have an extension that shows me my to-do list for the day.

Do you like to write poetry?  Nah, that’s always been my Achilles’ heel when it comes to writing.

Are your ears pierced?  Yup. Surprisingly enough they’ve never closed up despite never having worn earrings (clip-ons notwithstanding) in the last 13 years.

If so, were they pierced with a piercing gun, or with a sterile needle?  I’m not sure, since my mom had them pierced when I was a baby. I would guess piercing gun, though.

Do you wear makeup regularly? I never wear makeup.

Did you eat cereal for breakfast today?  I never have cereal unless I’m staying at hotels. It’s just never been something I look for.

When was the last time you tripped over something?  A box that was lying around in my room.

Any obsessive-compulsive tendencies?  I’ll sometimes get concerned with how many times I have to flick the switch of our hot water dispenser or open and close the refrigerator door before I feel completely satisfied...but I dunno if that counts.

Who was the last person you yelled at?  Technically...Angela? I was filming an unboxing video for a gift she randomly got me and I loved the gift so much I was yelling my excitement through the screen.

Why did you yell at them?  ^ That.

Favorite type of apple?  I don’t like fruits.

Ever seen live horse racing?  No, it’s not something that interests me.

How about live greyhound racing?  I don’t even know what that looks like.

What’s one thing, besides the obvious, that you couldn’t live without?  The arts, I guess. I need something to listen to, to watch, etc on a regular basis.

Have you ever touched a giraffe?  I don’t think so.

What does your mom call you?  Robyn, or the Filipino term parents use for their kids.

What stresses you out the most in life?  A particular client at work. We have a million campaigns going on for them at any given point so my life virtually revolves around that brand these days.

Do you play any PC games? What is your favorite?  Nope.

If you were pregnant, how would you tell the father? Well, that would depend on the circumstances. Did we want a baby? Was it a bad surprise, a happy surprise? I can't answer this with just one idea. < Yeah.

What’s the hardest level you can play on Guitar Hero?  If I’m using a Playstation controller, I can go Hard or Expert. But my finger coordination with the actual guitar controller is terrible and I fail most songs even at Easy.

What ever happened with you and your first boyfriend?  There was never any ‘boyfriend,’ but my first girlfriend and I have basically had a falling out and I haven’t talked to her in months, and I expect it to continue being that way.

What’s your favorite country song?  I don’t have any.

What is the worst thing a former boyfriend/girlfriend has done to you?  Putting her pride and anger first even when I’m obviously in a state of disstress or breakdown in front of her. That’s some emotional rollercoaster I’m glad I don’t have to deal with anymore.

What were you for Halloween last year?  Just Dora the Explorer again, which was a repeat from the year before that.

Are you feeling guilty for something?  I don’t think so; at least there isn’t anything I’m actively feeling guilty about at the moment.

Are you usually quiet or loud?  I think I’m in between? I’m pretty loud but I can space out at the most random moments hahaha.

How many hours do you spend on the computer a day?  This question always makes me wince at myself...I guess anywhere between 16-18 hours? The only time I put my laptop down is when I’m off to bed, but otherwise it’s constantly open.

What is the show that you watched when you were little, and you still do? I don’t think there is such a show.

Do your siblings text you?  Nope. We live under the same roof 24/7 so there’s been little need to text.

Do you want a small or big wedding?  Big.

Have you ever searched for your own house on Google Earth?  Yes, but that was when Google Earth was still super bare so I wasn’t able to see the actual house anyway, but just the general area where we’re located. I haven’t used Google Earth in years.

Who is your ex dating/talking to?  I don’t know and I hoooonestly could not care less.

Ever kissed someone who smokes?  Yep.

Does it take a lot for someone to annoy you?  Depends on my mood. I have my moments where it’s very easy for me to get irritated.

Do you own your own computer?  I mean it was bought for me, but I didn’t get it with money I earned.

Did you ever have to share a room with one of your siblings?  When my brother was starting to mature, my sister and I very very briefly experimented sharing a room, but it lasted like all of two weeks. My parents ultimately just transferred our balcony to a bedroom so that all three of us had our own rooms.

What noises in the room you’re in, do you hear at the moment?  An airplane is flying above me at the moment so I can hear its engine. I can also hear some crickets chirping and the faint barking of dogs.

Have you ever dated someone with longer hair than yours?  Yup.

What’s the biggest upcoming event for you?  I guess my second vaccine dose is kinda big? It’s happening this Friday.

What do you typically order from Wendy’s?  I rarely get Wendy’s tbh, but when I do I usually go for their Baconator.

Have you ever been given a lapdance by an actual stripper?  No, it’s not something I would be into.

What do you love most about yourself? Continued the next day because I am terrible at taking a survey in one go. I like that I don’t hesitate to do or buy things for my loved ones, not even inwardly. I guess it’s because my family has always lived very practically, so I want to make up for that by spoiling my friends.

Have you ever received a hickey from the last person you kissed?  Yes.

What are you doing right now?  I am supposed to be at work but it’s a relatively quiet day, so I’m here. I do have my screen split between Tumblr and my emails though, so that I’d be able to see if new work will come in hahaha.

What’s bothering you right now?  Quiet work days always make me anxious because it makes me think if I’m forgetting about something crucial.

What was the last thing you drank?  I literally just took a sip of my coffee before moving on to this question.

Be honest, do you like people in general?  Depends on the situation, I think. Like when I go to concerts, I know I’m around people I share the same interests with, so there’s a sense of solidarity that goes with that. But when I’m like...I dunno, lining up to get my license renewed at a government office, I know people there are in a rush and tend to get rude, and that makes me feel a little bit overwhelmed. I don’t think this is something I can generalize.

Do you want your tongue pierced?  No. Lip I can consider, but I have to pass on tongue. 

Do you change your phone background a lot?  I do these days, yeah.

Have you ever made someone so mad that they broke something?  Possibly.

Have you ever been strip searched?  I’ve been searched, but was never asked to strip.

Do you have a funny last name? Does anyone make fun of it?  No, it’s an ordinary surname.

Ever have a drug overdose? What did you OD on exactly?  Never.

Do you get sick of people who call themselves bipolar all the time? I get sick of people who call themselves bipolar, and of people who use ‘bipolar’ to describe someone else who just has your typical mood swings.

Describe your day so far in three words:  Business as usual.

What was the most stressful project you had so far/while in school? I was once designated as a leader for a science investigative project, which didn’t make sense because science was definitely not my strongest point. Needless to say it didn’t go well and I ended up being a terrible leader. Choose one- Butterfinger, Milky Way, Snickers:  Butterfinger, even though they’re a bitch to eat and chew.

Have you ever stepped in dog poop?  Maybe once or twice. It fortunately doesn’t happen a lot.

What was the last thing you spent money on?  I got Angela and Reena cheese tarts. The reason behind it was Jin held a VLIve last Monday and he had been eating egg tarts during the stream; and because I was happy to have watched my first Jin live, I got my friends cheese tarts hahaha. I don’t know a lot of places that sells good egg tarts so I settled for cheese tarts instead, which I think are better anyway.

Have you ever slept in the same bed with the last person you kissed?  Yeah.

Is there a guy that knows a lot about you?  I guess Hans? We personally don’t get to have a lot of heart-to-heart exchanges, but considering how Angela’s my greatest confidante I’m sure she has shared bits of my life to him, which I don’t mind.

Is there someone you just can’t imagine your life without?  I don’t really like answering this question anymore because the people that I’ve declared ‘for keeps’ have faded out of my life at some point. I’m a lot more guarded and self-preservation-y when it comes to this now.

Do you prefer Starbucks coffee or small cafe coffee?  Ooooh, both. I love coffee.

Would you ever consider getting a piercing in your septum?  No.

Do you enjoy being outdoors?  If the weather is nice, yes.

Do people tell you that you have an accent?  I mean I’ve been told my English is strong, but my accent in particular doesn’t really get noted.

Do you enjoy watching fireworks on the 4th of July?  I don’t celebrate that.

What’re some unspeakable subjects for you?  I don’t like talking about my brother. Otherwise I am pretty open about everything.

Is there anyone you would take a bullet for?  Several people come to mind.

Do you enjoy tanning?  If I’m at the beach, sure. It’s honestly not something I have to constantly keep up with, though, since I’m already naturally tan enough. Are you a virgin?  No.

Who’s your celebrity crush?  Taehyung :(

Did or do you get good grades in English class?  I always got pretty good grades in English.

What part of your body are you self-conscious about?  Teeth, and my legs sometimes.

Are you expected to help fix Thanksgiving dinner?  I don’t celebrate that.

Have you ever lost anyone close to cancer?  Yes.

Do you personally know anyone who is transgender?  Yes.

When was the last time you got a shot?  Last month, then I’m getting my second dose tomorrow.

[marikaaajoy]

my relationship with digital art and how BNHA salvaged it

I just wanted to let out my thoughts but I can only do it here :>

This might be a downer for some people but I’d like to share it with people here. BNHA means the world to me and this is why.

I first started drawing when I was 7 years old in 2006

I think it’s ugly now, but 7 year old me remembered being so proud of this because this is a drawing of my stepfather. This is the only drawing I have that was from my childhood. I think the aim here is to draw in anime style BUT I didn’t even watch anime back then. I had a classmate who loves anime and she taught me to draw in school. Drawing became a favorite hobby immediately after that.

Then it was 2013 and I was 14 years old. Drawing is still my favorite thing to do besides being on the computer. I love anime at this point too. My parents bought an iPad for the whole family, but I was almost always the one using it. I discovered an app called ArtStudio and thought “Wow, I can draw without making a mess and with only my fingers” because I was always too lazy to take out my drawing materials and clean up afterwards.

These were my first digital drawings. The pirate one was the very first. I got obsessed real fast. I can color so easily, undo any mistake, layers are a blessing too. There was just so much more freedom. I always sucked at coloring in traditional art and I didn’t like the mess (idk my hands get so messy traditionally)

The next year, it was 2014, I was 15. My birthday is in a couple of months and I knew my parents were planning to buy me something pricey (I think it was a laptop) so I approached them and asked if they could just buy the Wacom Bamboo as a present which was cheaper anyway and I even explained how it works to them and how it would allow me to draw on the computer instead of the iPad. I tried really hard to be convincing. I would have prepared a powerpoint presentation if I had to.

They did give me the wacom as a present. They even gave it to me months before my birthday so I could use it already. I thought I was the luckiest teen in the world with my parents.

These are a collection of my favorite works from 2014 to 2016. The middle one was my second drawing using wacom and Paint Tool SAI. I was a part of a lot of fandoms in those years lol

It gets downhill from there :/

April 2016, my mom and I moved to Japan, while my stepfather and siblings stay in my country. It was tough. For someone who is obsessed with anime, you’d think I’d be thrilled to live in Japan.

I was. Though only at the first few months. It’s not the same as it’s portrayed in anime (I should’ve known but I used to be blinded by anime). It was just lonely. The language barrier sucked and then lots of financial and family issues until my parents split. I got my first boyfriend too and I thought I was blessed by the nicest boy, but the relationship became extremely toxic but I didn’t have it in me to walk away.

All the shit that happened affected me mentally and emotionally. My biggest outlet which was digital drawing, was also out of the question because I did not have a computer/laptop when we moved to Japan. We left it in our home for my stepfather and siblings, even the iPad. I have my wacom with me, but no computer/laptop to use it with. I couldn’t draw.

I tried though. I used my phone to draw, but it wasn’t the same. Then the life problems got piled up, things got worse, and I just lost motivation in anything. Literally anything. From 2016 to 2019, I stopped watching anime, I dropped out of all the fandoms I’m in, I stopped watching my favorite TV series or movies, and I stopped drawing. I even got a bit disconnected with my friends who lived in my country (we talk regularly online). My family was broken so I gave all my attention to my toxic relationship as well which made everything worse too lol

I didn’t draw besides from a few scribbles and the drawings above. I did try digital art on my phone a couple of times again and even posted them on my IG, but they weren’t any good. Eventually, I got mentally and emotionally drained and dropped out of senior high school. I just stayed home for almost a year, leeching off of my mom. I felt even more worthless and my life had no direction at this point. Nothing mattered anymore.

April 2019 or so I think, my (ex)bf bought me a laptop. He says it’s a gift, but I think the real reason was to make up for something horrible that he did (which is stupid because money /gifts won’t resolve anything). I have a laptop. I can draw again, but I didn’t. I didn’t care, I wasn’t interested in drawing anymore anyway.

Welp. June 2019, I went back to my country. My (ex) bf stayed in Japan. The distance helped me end the relationship and my friends were there (they always were) to help put me back together along with two trips to therapy. I went back to finish my senior high school in my own country this time. That said, I have to stay in my country for school (but I was happy because I didn’t wanna go back to Japan yet when the breakup was still fresh and with going back to school, my life has a direction again.)

It was weird. I remember just being sorta lost and confused because I used to put my time, effort and everything into my previous toxic relationship, which was now gone. I was free and I had so much free time that I didn’t know what to do with it. I got so used to doing nothing and being nothing.

This is where BNHA enters.

Dunno when it started, but I started seeing Bakugou frequently online. It’s usually just Bakugou. I knew who he was because my friend suggested BNHA to me back in late 2018 I think but I didn’t watch it since I’ve lost interest in everything at that point in my life.

But ye I thought he hot af but I still didn’t watch BNHA.

But then for some reason he REALLY kept appearing in my social medias and it was really frequent. The last straw was when I saw a pic of him in UA’s gym uniform and thought “damn boi aight imma watch bnha for u” (y’all gotta admit he looks good in those colors with his combat boots XD )

I watched BNHA. Fell in love with Iida along the way. Then I switched to Tokoyami (but Shoji was hot too so aaaaa), but then angry emotionally-constipated sea urchin head caught my heart again. But oof. BakuDeku moments really made me feel some type of way I haven’t felt since I moved to Japan. It felt new but nostalgic. I fell hard in that ship.

I started obsessing. From memes to posts to fanfictions to buying merch to filling my room with BNHA posters. I realized I was reverting to my old self from the time I was still happy and it was thanks to BNHA (and the good people who helped me through the worst too)

Shit I wanted to draw BNHA, I thought.

I mean, I have a laptop, I still have my wacom and drawing softwares. I could totally draw digitally again if I wanted to.

But guess what

I can’t :c

My hand physically cannot draw. My drawings don’t look the way I want them too. 3 years of not drawing really destroyed any skill I had. I was back to square one.

September (yeah they’re ugly, I laughed at it). If you’re wondering why I drew on paper, it’s because, for some reason, I really CANNOT draw digitally. I mean it. I can barely sketch digitally at this point. The lines and shapes just doesn’t come to life. They’re just scribbles. But somehow, I can kinda draw on paper with a ballpoint pen. But yeah, that was the best I could do at this point in my life

After that, I still tried to draw, to regain my old art style, but it didn’t happen... It just doesn’t look or feel the same. Drawing used to be fun. But during this phase, it felt like my ugly drawings were just mocking me (probably was just too emo that time lol)

Weirdly, around a week or two I think, after my half-assed attempts at drawing, I managed to draw digitally somehow o.o

I did a Midoriya and Todoroki drawing like this too. It was my first post here on Tumblr I think. The annoying part here is that I cannot draw digitally unless I draw on paper first, take a pic, and then trace the lineart. I couldn’t draw directly on the computer. Granted, drawing on paper and drawing on digital is very different for me in the first place anyway. But it was still a pain. And it still looked like shit. I can only draw stiff poses :/ it seems like my brain decided to delete all data about anatomy and posture and backgrounds. My lineart here is even messy af. It still really not the same as my old style.

By 2020, I think I got my old art style back. On March, I made this. This took me 27 total of hrs to make.

Right now, I think it’s not bad, but back in March, I was disappointed with the result. This is when I finally broke down crying because it didn’t look good enough and I hated that it took me 27 hrs to draw “bullshit.” I was angry at myself for losing interest in drawing for 3 years when I could’ve used that time to improve. I had to start all over again and it still didn’t look good. (Current me thinks that the drawing above is alright. I was just a lot harsher to myself back then. Used to have a lot of issues but I’m doing great now)

I cried myself to sleep that night. Woke up wanting to cry again. I wallowed in sadness for a couple of days. Eventually told my friends what’s up. Got some pep talk. Even talked to my sister (she’s great, she always hypes me up with my stuff and sometimes I think she’s my biggest fan with how she appreciates my drawings and I’m really grateful for that).

My world turned a 180 and I was weirdly positive after all that crying because brain chemicals and shit. I had a revelation. If I hate how my art style looked so much, then I should have been putting effort in changing my art style, not trying to regain my old art style (that I don’t like anymore)

I researched a lot. I analyzed different art styles and anatomy again. I did everything I could think of to find a style that works for me. I might have even neglected school for a bit to focus on digital art lmao

After all that work, I posted a fanart of middle school BakuDeku in their classroom. I love that fanart so much even if I probably have better ones by now because that was the first fanart I made that I felt like I could be proud of and it was the first one I made in my new art style. It was a milestone for me.

March 2020, I moved back to Japan and without the toxic relationship, I’m a lot positive now. Happy. I’m myself again after the previous bad years. I’m still continuously learning though, trying to improve, but at least, now, I found my own art style :) I really suck at interacting with people online, but I’m always grateful for the support everyone has been giving my fanarts. I’m happy when my content makes people happy.

This is why BNHA is important to me. The series is great alone, but it’s not just that to me. BNHA is so much more. It’s what made me find the passion to create again, only this time, it’s focused on drawing (I used to write, but now I just draw, but maybe I’ll write again for BNHA).

My family is supportive with my love for BNHA, but I think they don’t know the deeper reason why I love it. Sure, I was fine living on with nothing much going on in my life. I’ll finish school, get a job, work until I die or something. It was okay. It was the way of life. But BNHA gave my life color again. I wasn’t just blindly going through life anymore. I have something to look forward to everyday now. BNHA even became a bridge to other things. Ever since then, I’m a lot more open to people, to try new things, to explore and not just live through life and waste away. I got better at leaving my comfort zone. I’ve never been happier in my life :D

Thank you for supporting my fanarts. Thank you so much for giving me a chance to express myself through BNHA. I hope to make more content in the future and improve even more :)

[universal-kitty]

.: Drama Involving AJ :.

   Stylized ‘til I die, I guess. Anyways.

   This is talking about phasefuck/huckerbee/teafrogs/whatever their URL is this week. AJ/Lee. The compilation of what’s happened involving them.

   So... Starting at the beginning.

   D was the reason I got into Borderlands. I watched her play TFTBL and gush about Rhys and get more involved and understand the ship she had! Also got my first crush on Zer0, but... Y’know.

   So I did some art, started plotting ideas for who’d eventually be Gremlin- aka Rena Marlow, my SI for BLands- and that led...to us meeting AJ. They wanted me or D to join their server. D preferred because of her self-ship with Rhys, but I could join, too. D was nervous about new, strange people and I wanted to learn more about Borderlands and try new things, so... I hopped in, D stayed behind.

   The time with them was pretty fun! Ended up making some friends, plotted fun ideas for AJ’s idea of the time, Borderlands Infinite. A continuation of Tales as AJ saw it. The server was made PRIMARILY for this endeavor and everyone in it was allowed an OC or self-insert to be paired with whoever they wanted to be with....long as they were open, that is. AJ had HJack, and everyone else... Well, most of the spares had been paired off by the time I joined.

   Rhys was potentially still open, cause someone AJ had previously been talking with...either wasn’t responding, or had dropped out entirely. I forget by this point. Zer0 wasn’t an option and I didn’t know much of the others, so.... I accepted Gremlin to be paired with Rhys.

   Thus the origins of my verse with Rhys. (As well as the OT3 with him and Vaughn... They started here.)

   Tension was pretty high in the group and- though I didn’t acknowledge it at the time- it was primarily from AJ. Nobody else could like Handsome Jack “too much”... You could be playful about him, a little joke-flirty...but if you were suspected to like HJack, then you were “stealing” him from them. Because of this- while the group was friendly enough- it was hard to get into the “share faves” vibe that a lot of us seemed to have; gushing about a character that wasn’t your own just......felt weird.

   Not sure if anyone else noticed, but that was my experience.

   Anyways, I helped AJ with their story a lot due to being online a ton, with no work to do. We talked on the daily about what Rena could do, what Helios was like, how the story would go... The long-term slowburn we were putting Rena and Rhys through. I praised their art and ideas, they cheered for Rena/Rhys. It was pretty mutually supportive....

   ...Until AJ kicked fits. I was always online, so what about everyone else?? When I wasn’t online- sometimes if I was- I’d get put on a pedestal for helping out while others said nothing. (Essentially saying something like “Aki helps out all the time, but nobody else does” or, the popular one, “maybe I should just delete this since nobody cares.” I don’t have screenshots of this for reasons that’ll be explained in a moment.)

   We typically talked them out of these, but eventually... It did happen. AJ messaged me that the old group had been deleted and there was now a new group of only the ACTIVE people. This left me and a few others, thought some other people would eventually cycle in. (One of which still being someone I look up to even today!! Even if we don’t talk much, lol.)

   I got more creative freedom during this time, since other people “lost out” in their spots and... Somehow, this led to me taking on Nisha, too. I paired her with my OCs, Pyrotech and Meowzer. (Ex-Creepypasta OCs revamped for BLands. Is this my origins for my Nisha ship? Kinda!!!)

   But by this point... I had grown to *really* like HJack. I’d made a slip before (more on that later), but learned his character very well and even played him for roleplays AJ and I were doing. AJ played themself and Rhys; I controlled Jack and Rena. All that research led to feelings....and ones I knew AJ wouldn’t approve of. So I did two things, right off the bat: kept my head down and immediately worked on justifying why I liked him. See, it’s because...it’s not the “canon” Handsome Jack!! The one I ship with has golden clasps! So they’re not the same!! And uhhhh....more bad things happened to him? He dresses more lavishly...?

   I kept trying to come up with ways AJ might approve of my AU Jack without invoking their wrath. Not that...it would end up doing much, in the long run.

   I invited one of my friends to join during this. One who also liked HJack...and proved my worries right. (Checked my Discord; I still have some of the messages!!! Whoop, here we go...)

   Don’t have screencaps of the drama that proceeded to unfold- especially due to AJ blocking me on Discord and so losing all of our conversation- but.... That’s just how THAT is, I guess.

   They did get super cold after and I had to explain things to my friend, while also assuring AJ that I would handle things and it’d be alright. It was an uncomfortable hiccup, but one that went by easily enough...

   Though as I said, it was a significant event to show me how careful I needed to be when it came to HJack and AJ.

   Also during this time... Another friend I’ll just refer to as P. We’d also been roleplaying in this time and having a blast. Absolute joy and- we don’t talk much anymore- but I do still consider them a dear friend. I played as CEO Rhys for them and they were Handsome Jack for me; we played our characters (my SI, their OC) and just... Had so much fun with it all.

   So then... Amidst all the fun, it eventually happened.

   What I described in this callout post.

   AJ and I...we ended up dating at some point. I thought they were cool, we got along well, talked a LOT and all this... So I didn’t see a problem with it. Why not? I’ll get to have an awesome artist S/O with their cool ship and all their ideas... We’re gonna be unstoppable!

   ...But I also had abandonment issues. Too many times did I pour my all into someone, only to be left empty. I’ve always been the most supportive person in a room, trying to uplift EVERYONE to feel good! Cause yeah, everyone deserves that! AJ knew this. We’d talked about our issues and vented.....

   And they still did that.    They left my server as I slept. Blocked me on Discord, though I didn’t notice it at first.

   ...It was the one day I checked Tumblr first. They left their blog for a new one. Okay!! I’ll follow them on there, then! I did, and checked Discord. That was in the vent channel, and this was sent to me by a mutual friend.

   So that’s how I woke up that day. Suddenly alone and single. And very, very depressed. I would end up posting these as my friends had to help me down:

“ ……now I wish I would’ve gotten lost after all or kept sleeping ….nothing is work being awake right now”

“ I just don’t want to exist I hate myself all over again I can’t get past that”

“ AJ just…..dropped me. Just like that. I didn’t know and tried to follow her new blog….. Either they just soft-blocked me or outright blocked me

“I feel so fuckin’ horrible”

   At the time, I was horribly depressed due to outside causes. I was suicidal at the time and getting into some light, risky behavior in hopes it could be a factor in the end of my life. (I would walk around at night, hoping that the growing heat would either cause heat exhaustion or someone would attack me. Abduct me. Whatever meant that I would be gone and in pain.)

   I later learned that this is actually learned behavior; my dad would react in extremist ways to things (something broke? “I want to kill myself.”) and so I probably learned it from him. This has actually made managing my suicidal thoughts easier, but at the time, I did not know this and put me more at risk.

   Though this then kept continuing.... Because of course these things do.

   It starts all over with me trying to move on. Someone was advertising their self-ship server, I wanted to try again and make friends... So I gave it a shot and joined!

   ....AJ was in there.

   I quickly left as soon as I had entered, telling the owner I couldn’t stay due to troubles with someone else in there. They were understanding and, thankfully, that was that.

   ...But it STILL wasn’t. These are older messages, so I can’t get them together as much as I’d like to (in one screenshot, is what I’m saying) so I’ll also quote these, but if anyone needs screenshot proof, I can get that on request.

   Anyways, our mutual friend (I’ll nickname her MF for “mutual friend” lol) later piped up with this:

05/19/2018 “So, aj invited me to a group chat and I'm a pushover who hasn't been able to cut them off yet so I said yes and boi I'm big uncomfortable now Like I thought I could maybe juggle being friends with both aj and Rachel even after what aj did but I was wrong.

“But idk what do now. I don't know what to say to them because I don't want to just drop them without saying anything. No doubt that'll get them talking about me behind my back”

.:.

“I might try that. I might mute the server so that I don't have to deal with that because i can't stay in it but I don't want to start shit by leaving I mean they are acting like Rachel is in the wrong”

.:.

“That they "stole their f/o" and that they are going to take the dragon idea that Rachel had for blands and "make it better" out of spite And I'm not happy”

.:.

“Well I just typed up a long message and while I'm glad I'll finally cut out a toxic person I'm also super nervous

“I sent it and left the server

“Wow okay all I got was a "Bye then" I sent a long ass message. Explaining my side and why. Hoping they'd understand and they just said bye then??????”

   As you can see.... Everyone who’d been in that server (me, P, and MF) were on-edge about the “talking behind our back” issue that MF confirmed above. I figured it would happen, but it did...and that was a league all it’s own. (Especially when the callout post went around, and it got confirmed AGAIN that slander in my name was still going around.)

   But one more thing happened that triggered this onslaught... Remember my RP w/ P? Well, this happened.... [TW for daddy kink mention? Calling themself Daddy?? That thing.]

   Link to Ask.

   Was never reblogged. Sent to me by a friend. To my knowledge, nobody spread this around AT ALL. But this was brought up in the same vent/time period as the above conversation.....

MF: Aj said that Rachel stole hj from them.

Me: Me, apparently. It's somewhere between that post and the ask (I think?) P sent me..... Which I loved and was hella surprised over, but. Oh boy.

Fren (aka owner of Karma): My god wtf can she like calm tf down

MF: They actually were mad that people were reblogging a post of yours, probably the kitten thing, that was about hj because it's "gross"

Fren: geeze Aj grow up

Me: ??????? Nobody reblogged it, tho

MF: Hmmmmm they vagued about someone shipping with him, someone they had blocked, that liked the daddy kink and stuff

   I mean. I get it’s a gross thing for people, but.... HJack has also called himself “daddy/papa” on more than one occasion. It’s up for debate if he does it because he is Literal Dad or because he’s that nasty, but... Considering everything else he does, the latter seems the most obvious. That’s just how he is.

   Anyways. The point being that we had each other mutually blocked by this point. I had people either block me, soft-block me, OR just outright unfollow + soft-block me because they were more trusting of AJ than of me. So to hear that they somehow knew P was sending me that ask...... Either someone TOLD them or they were stalking my blog to see what I was doing while they were gone.

   Either way, not great. (What was pretty funny is I later made a joke about “stealing the rights to Handsome Jack from 2k so nobody else can do anything with him” and that “I’m a wanted man”... That’s nice.)

   And so... We get to more recently.

   Last I personally heard, I had to do some personal checking that led up to this... Saw leeships in self insert tag. New self-ship blog, so I blocked, as well as checking their blocked main to make sure everything lined up....and was greeted with this.

   They’ve since changed their URL- again- but the fact they’re STILL being petty towards D is just....something else.

   Speaking of, I’m not actually...sure where that started. There was a whole conversation we had over how AJ treated D out of sight of others (they talked over IMs, I guess because we were budding friends at the time, and what else do I do but hype up all my friends?) There was a lot of attention-seeking behavior from AJ (showing their art and then getting mad when D or Fren tried to compliment them for “lying” about the compliment...?), but far as I knew/remember, there wasn’t any bigger issue.

   ...After we broke up, however, an issue began as D and I became better friends. Friends stick with friends, D knew AJ, so when the blocking-bug was going around, D blocked them, too.

   Which eventually snowballed into the bullshit you can still see today. With AJ trying to claim that D is the one dealing out harassment when- at worst- maybe D did talk too much and AJ didn’t deal with it in a healthy way. (Because that is an issue I’ve heard of; except AJ freaked out over it, instead of talking it out like a healthy adult and figuring out how they could balance out the conversation. Seriously. I’ve had this talk with D. We don’t dominate our conversations at all; nobody over the other. If there ever was a problem, then literally just saying “Hey, I don’t feel heard/listened to when I talk about my ship” was all AJ ever needed to say, but....... Y’KNOW.)

   I’m not D, so I can’t say the full scenario of that, but this is the best way I can show there was a middle ground AJ could’ve used to work things out, but they didn’t.

   Oh, and just so I’m not saying things if you haven’t already seen this... Here’s a screenshot someone (for privacy’s sake) got of AJ trying to pin the blame on D for being the “real harasser” in their BYF:

   We all just wanted to get over this. However, D and I especially don’t want to get involved with or be AROUND AJ/Lee in any way. So we keep an eye on what they do so we can feel safe. We DON’T want to forgive AJ/Lee (for obvious reasons), so we keep blocking their accounts and/or make sure they’re still on our blocklist.

   I know I’ve resorted to putting their URLs on BLACKLIST to make sure I don’t see them at ALL because of how much stress they put me under just seeing them around.

   What the hell do THEY have to be stressed about? Dealing with people they hurt for BEING hurt and not wanting them around us anymore?? Fuck....

.:.

    Anyways. I guess that about concludes all I wanted to write about. Friendly reminder that their old callout post is here and while I doubt a new one will crop up any time soon (as I sure don’t want to write one that’ll get around, after the last time I had a friend try to help me do a callout post on someone like this), you can at least look up that one more time after reading this.

   So...... That’s the end. Thanks for reading this and I’m sorry if anything was upsetting.

   ...If you want, you can come to the ask box and ask for a gif of your F/O? Or a cute puppy or kitten? Maybe I can find some nice fanart for you as comfort...? IDK, options.

[mothraballs]

Sketchbooks From Over The Last Seven Years

I have a box of sketchbooks and random sketches that I’ve been adding to since I was about 12.  Today I went through it all and I decided I’d make a post about it because. idk. why not I guess? So obviously its not every page of every book but like if anyone wants to go through about 7 years of bad sketchbooks and loose sketches and doodles its under the cut. Some nudity

.Going through this sucked a little because like who in the world ever wants to go through their middle school art??? Its hard not to get rid of that stuff because like not only does it suck but it makes me remember middle school and things like anime club and like. ew. But it’s nice to see how much less I suck at this, even if i’m not nearly as talented as I’d like to be. It also makes me sad to think of art i’ve lost, even if it was bad. I don’t have pretty much anything that I did digitally from like age 13-16 because I either deleted it or lost it when a computer broke because i didnt back that up since I didnt think id care but l kinda wish I still had some of that stuff, just like to compare improvement over such a big time period.

 I wanted to find some of my actual finished art to post with this, but I couldn’t find it today, so it’s only sketchbook stuff (but I dont finish a lot of things anyway lol). Maybe I’ll make another post comparing old things I actually finished with new stuff once I can find it because I know it’s around here somewhere anyway heres sketchbooks!!

This is from 7th grade, so I guess I was 12. It’s god fucking awful, complete with drawings of memes (which I will spare u from), slenderman fan art, and a weird message about my middle school bike, which I still have in my garage, being stolen, which it never was. And the brakes do work.

 why

  This one is also from when I was 12, but it’s only about 1/4 of the way full. 

i think i had a mental brakedown here lmao

@douche-mccoosh​ ‘s sexy page

This one was either from 7th-8th grade or just in 8th grade. Idk. Either way I was probably 13 years old. Just a warning: Mlp fan art starts here

1 (ONE) wolf

idk what this is supposed to be honestly

long forgotten OC

This one was also from when I was 13

I had this from age 13-14, I started drawing digitally a LOT more around age 14, so I guess I wasnt rly using my sketchbook as much

this was like straight copied from a piece I saw at an art magnet school I applied to (obviously I didnt get in lmfao) and I really did not understand how dark I needed to make the paper in some spots. And then I never finished it

A pony OC... she was a robot ok

I think I had this one age 14-15. The paper ended up being translucent so I stopped using it early on. Im kinda glad I didn’t fill it up because that actually might be kinda useful to me now

Sweet notes from @lmkno​  

This one wasn’t in the picture on the top bc I found it later. I think I might also be missing like 1 other one too tbh but oh well lol I think I had it when I was 15? really stopped drawing like a lot around this time, I wasn’t doing digital stuff either cuz my computer was broken at the time

This is also about when I stopped throwing away every single thing i drew on a loose piece of paper, so here’s some random sketches from the general timeframe

First sketches of my OCs Vonn, the fish man and Elliot, the girl with pigtails

Some of my art I’ve sorted correlating to the OC’s and the universe they belong in or whatever so here’s some OC’s that sort of came about around that time, some of the pictures are from when I was older though

Ginger

the TV head robot guy was named Seven

the guy with the fuckin,, circle head and weird face is Wolfgang, I still draw him a lot today but ive changed how he looks a  l o t

I had this age 15-16, so like 2014-15. Maybe early 2016? There’s a lot of blank pages and scribbled out things. I 

Wolfgang again

fukkin,,,, gaye ass furry roleplay oc

Sketches on loose paper from the time I think??? I honestly cant tell when all of these are from but they’re gonna go here.

first design of an OC named Eryl

A random D20 character

Eryl

Early drawings of an OC named Lucy Lucy Lucy Lucy Lucy Lucy Lucy Lucy Lucy aka Lucy Ninetimes

Lucy & Wolfgang

And heres more stuff I had sorted by OCs/universe or whatever

main OCs here are Pidgenfinger, with the blue or possibly stylistic black hair, and Chrissy, shes like. A mouse or something

main OCs here are Roland and Ansel, they were like siamese twins and then one of them died at birth and now this guy just has a ghost twin idk it was stupid

Finally we’re at the point that my phone started recognizing faces in my sketchbook. I had this one age 17, i might have started it like right before I turned 17?

Lucy & Wolfgang

Vonn and Elliot on the right side of the page

Pidgenfingersa

Roland & Ansel

Dont Starve fanart on the right

Elliot on the right

Lucy on the bottom left

Vonn & Elliot on this page too

Lucy & Wolfgang, this is dumb but w/e

Von, Elliot, and another OC, Eryl. The lady with horns never got a name

Random Sketches

Lucy

Wolfgang

I got this sketchbook a few months after id turned 18 if i remember correctly 

Lucy, but decapitated

Lucy

Lucy again

Lucy yet again

Lucy!!!!!!!!!!

Wolfgang

(and Lucy)

I got this sketchbok as a gift from my wonderful boyfriend @the-lost-professor​ early january of this year, so technically when I was 18, I’m now 19

Eryl on bottom right

Stuff I did for mermay

some random sketches

My current sketchbok ft. Tsu This one was also a gift from my boyfriend ♥ I got it late June of this year

Wolfgang

Lucy

Wolfgang

Lucy

Wolfgang and Leah, and OC that i made a long ass time go and I dont have the original picture but I redrew her

Wolfgangs and Lucys

Eryl on the left

The last thing I did for mermay, which I technically finished after may ended

Lucy

and the most recent page! With Lucy and Wolfgang on the right

uhhhhhhhhh

im really fucking hungry now and im gonna go eat bye

[the-storm-winds]

Found this thing in my drafts and decided to fill it...

MOST RECENT: 1. Drink: Water, probably 2. Phone call: The last one I answered was back in March, some wrong number while I was in Hong Kong 3. Text: One of my sisters 4. Song you listened to: Don't Leave Me (Ne Me Quitte Pas) by Regina Spektor 5. Time you cried: Several days ago, and I was actually crying from laughter. I've been somewhat less depressed lately

HAVE YOU EVER: 6. Dated someone twice: No 7. Been cheated on: No: 8. Kissed someone and regretted it: No 9. Lost someone special: Lost as in they died? If yes, my cat, Gandiva. Otherwise, there's my twitter friend who deleted her account... T_T 10. Been depressed: Yea 11. Been drunk and thrown up: No

list 3 favorite colors:

12. Deep blue 13. Colors that are close to blue, like blue-violet and blue-green 14. (VALUE) CONTRAST (I'm a nasty cheating artist hahahaha. Good combinations >>> any single color)

IN THE LAST YEAR, HAVE YOU: 15. Made a new friend: Online, yes 16. Fallen out of love: No 17. Laughed until you cried: Yes

18. Met someone who changed you: Hm I guess so

19. Found out who your true friends are: No

20. Found out someone was talking about you: No

21. Kissed anyone on your fb list: No

Extras:

22. How many ppl from your fb list do you know irl: ...66, apparently. I'm surprised it's so many. I don't *really* know them all though... as in I doubt I'd remember their names if I saw them 23. Do you have any pets: Well my family has a bunch of cats but none of them are "mine" exactly 24. Do you want to change your name: I wish my last name was cooler. I want my mom's maiden name lol 25. What did you do for your last birthday: Finals lol. It was my first birthday away from home. My mom had a cake delivered to my dorm.

26. What time did you wake up today: 11 something 27. What were you doing last night at midnight: Reading Akira/Ryuji fanfiction like the trash I am 28. Name something you can’t wait for: More Akira/Ryuji fanfictions (and any other good content) 29. Last time you saw your mom: Maybe an hour ago? 30. What is one thing you wish you could change about your life: 31. What are you listening to rn: Guinea keets (chicks) peeping 32. Have you ever talked to a person named Tom: I have no idea lol 33. What’s getting on your nerve rn: Eh nothing really 34. Blood type: No idea 35. Nickname: Silver, Storm, 阿银, Ra-ra 36. Relationship status: I've always been single loooollll 37. Zodiac sign: Sagittarius 38. Pronouns: She/her 39. Favorite tv shows: Puella Magi Madoka Magica, Mushi-shi... and some others I guess. I haven't been too into watching stuff lately. 40. High school: I was homeschooled haha 41. College: Savannah College of Art and Design

43. Long or short: ???????????? Oh wait my hair? Long 44. Height: 5'4" 45. Do you have a crush on someone: No 46. What do you like about yourself: I'm ok I guess?? 47. Right or left handed: Right handed 48. First surgery: Uhm do root canals count? I got four of them as soon as my molars came in 49. Piercings: Ears

50. First best friend: THAT TWITTER FRIEND I MENTIONED

51. First sport you joined: Gymnastics

52. First vacation: ...idk? What constitutes a vacation?

RIGHT NOW: 53. Eating: Well I'm gonna be eating s'mores in a few minutes 54. Drinking: Water

55. I’m about to: Go outside to roast marshmallows (see above)

56. Listening to: I can kinda hear crickets I think

57. Waiting for: FANFICS TO UPDATE

WANT: 58. Kids: No 59. Get married: Erm... I guess it depends... 60. Career: Artist... I'm not 100% sure *exactly* what direction though

WHICH IS BETTER: 61. Lips or eyes: eyes 62. Hugs or kisses: Uh 63. Taller or shorter: Idk 64. Older or younger: Idc

65. Romantic or spontaneous: Uhh 66. Nose, stomach, or nice arms: Uh

67. Sensitive or loud: Idk??? Both?? 68. Hookup or relationship: Relationship 69. Troublemaker or hesitant: ...Niether? But more outgoing than me so I guess more towards troublemaker... but not making actual trouble

HAVE YOU EVER:

70. Kissed a stranger: No 71. Drank liquor: I had like a fingernail sized sip of wine (because my mom told me to try it lmao) on New Years when I was 18 or 19 and it was gross af 72. Lost glasses/contacts: A few contacts probably 73. Had sex on the first date: Never even had a date lmaoo 74. Broke someone’s heart: I doubt it 75. Turned someone down: Yes... there was this weirdo selling bootleg DVDs at a Chinese restaurant (though he wasn’t Chinese or anything) and he asked for my number... I gave it to him because I wasn’t prepared for the situation and didn’t know how to say no, but then he kept texting and calling me and... I never went to that restaurant again  76. Cried when someone died: Yes 77. Fallen for a friend: Erm. I kinda had a crush on the twitter friend I mentioned for awhile

DO YOU BELIEVE IN: 78. Yourself: Depends 79. Miracles: I guess... idk 80. Love at first sight: Eh... no

81. Heaven: Well... not how it's generally portrayed. I do believe in other dimensions though.

82. Santa Claus: No 83. Kissing on a first date: *internal screaming*

aaand I’m gonna tag @personal-burrito, and @jewelfaerie. It’s been so long since I’ve talked to anyone on here... I’m not sure who else still considers me a friend lol. Feel free to do it, and you can say I’ve tagged you if you want

[figmentforms]

Fig Chatter!

It has been way, way to long since I got into my inbox. Thanks for your patience and after a couple quick announcements, I’ll get to as many as I can!

-Shuto Con- I will have my art booth at Shuto Con again this year! (March 17th - 19th, 2017) I’ve been assigned space #54 in the artist alley! I’ll have lots of art prints, bookmarks, art books, some original sketches, and i should have more prints of AToTR v1 from the printer by then as well.

-Health-  Thanks so much to all of you that wrote and wished me well after I mentioned I was having health troubles. It meant a lot and I really appreciated it.  Here’s how that’s going: After a quick exam about a week ago, the neurologist SAID I’M PROBABLY OK!!! :D I had some blood tests and an MRI yesterday, so after the results are in on those, I can know for certain!  

(For those wondering, my eyes suddenly did a “David Bowie impression” and then kept doing it randomly for the past few months, along with other concerning stuff like numb spots on my legs and random hand weakness. I will be sure to mention how this turns out in a later update! lol, for now I’m just super glad to have the neurologist’s assurance that I’m probably not about to drop dead!)

And now for the questions!

I love this idea. I hadn’t thought of it going in that direction, but now I’m totally gonna daydream about it!

I had previously thought that Ghirahim would be the one to go out on a quest to find the young reincarnation of Ganondorf and help him grow up strong and powerful. He would help Ganondorf recall who he is and how to better harness the energy from his piece of the triforce. Maybe even help teach him combat again. (Even cooler if they were techniques that Ganondorf invented himself, but had forgotten between lives.) The bond between these two is so beautiful. TwT

OMG i would LOVE that! Just be aware that tumblr has been taking down all nsfw Ganondorf images (maybe other loz stuff too, but i only notice the Ganondorf ones). They may take down your picture just as they took down mine. I would recommend treading on the more sfw side if you want it to stay up! (and I very much would want it to) XD

Sadly I have no idea who he is! Link’s face is based off of some nice lookin’ fella i saw dressed up as Link at GenCon a few years ago. I didn’t even think to take a photo and I regret it all the time.

A lot of people mentioned that they were disappointed! (and honestly I am too) but with tumblr taking down all nsfw content (and even deleting an entire nsfw art blog that a friend of mine had), it made me back off from it. T-T I’m sorry, everyone!

Oh that would be super sweet. Right now I’m thinking she may meet a descendant of Princess Ruto at some royal ball and get hit upside the brain with a sudden terrible crush on her. (Then comes awkward Rinku, inwardly screaming “OMG WHAT DO I DO. I LIKE THIS GIRL. DOES SHE LIKE ME BACK??? HOW CAN I EVEN TELL??? IS MY BREATH OK??? DID I SERIOUSLY PUT MY SHIRT ON BACKWARDS THIS MORNING??? AUGHHH” the entire day that the zora princess is around. )

I’m 29! :D And I’ll be 30 on February 13th! Dun-Dun-Dunnnnnnnn.

omg how did I NOT THINK TO DO THAT!!!!?!?!

*tries to hold back my giggles of SHAME*

but really, Ganondorf broke the previous bed just by sitting on it, so there’s a plausible excuse of innocence there.

(But then again, this is a married couple that likes each other and are both happy and willing participants in this ‘sexy times’ activity so i’m not quite sure why i feel so embarrassed at the idea that they broke the bed during their enthusiastic ‘activities’. So you know what? YES. YES THEY BROKE THE BED DURING THE FRICKFRACK. HUZZAH!)  XD

Oh dear, heck yeah Impa is queasy. Probably one of the most difficult evenings they’ve had to deal with in quite some time. It’s bad enough to hear that kinda thing through the wall in general, but under THESE circumstances, that’s gotta be really painful. After all, they still think that Ganondorf could kill Zelda on a whim at any moment.  

PFFFTTT XD LOL

Ghirahim, “I swear to GOD if ONE MORE PERSON comments on how good i look in this stupid Link illusion, I’M BURNING DOWN ALL OF HYRULE.” *cries on the inside*

Yep! In loz canon Vaati is actually a cute little creature called a minish!  He just uses magic to look different! https://zeldawiki.org/Minish

Probably! But if so it will be much much later in the comic.

OMG YES.

XD Oh yeah. She’s going to have a difficult time, that’s for sure at least. But I think the most interesting thing will be the reactions of the rest of the family as these troubles go on.

I think so, but that would also be much later in the story. Would be amazing to draw though.

Well, this is really a matter of taste. I usually go with a word like “wolf” over “wolfos” because it sounds better in my head. It makes what you’re creating a little easier to enjoy for people who may not be as familiar with the game lore as well. Best of luck on your fic! :D

My mortal enemy has been doing quite well since my attempts to capture and re-locate him failed miserably a few summers ago...

SO WELL in fact that last summer I saw 4 baby gophers out there with him... as he taught them his wicked ways of lawn destruction RIGHT IN FRONT OF ME. So even though I will out live KHAAAAAAN, his evil assault against my poor yard will live on through his descendants. (ノಠ益ಠ)ノ彡┻━┻

XD COULD happen! (omg, I really enjoy people guessing what’s gonna happen next. If anyone wants to put out their ideas, I always love to hear them. It’s like looking in a parallel universe of the story!)

XD LOL! Not to worry. I understand the feeling! But hey! If you ever feel like going for it anyway, you can just do what I do with my shameful romance novels and wrap the cover in scrap-booking paper! As far as anyone around me knows, I could be readin’ a bible. 

[chelsorz07]

you know it’s not forever

I think I’m gonna stop doing these soon, since it’s been at least a year since I started the series and I have to have repeated some already. But for tonight I have nothing else to do. Also for anyone who actually cares I’m working on a fic...it’s not my first but it will be the first one I finish and publish so keep an eye out in the next couple days, Dean/Cas fans ♥

2010/2018

What's one of your locked text messages? a line from a justin bieber song that sarah sent me haha Don’t have any. This phone doesn’t delete shit apparently. Where is the one boy/girl you want to see the most right now? at this very moment i would grow a left nut just so i could give it away if it gave me the opportunity to kick it with mah weskimo. Texas. Do you think your last ex deserves to die? i don't think about him, one way or the other. I definitely do not think that. He thinks that. And I try to convince him every day that he’s wrong, just like he does for me. Who was the last person you slept in the same bed with? david. Dave but he’s been gone for two weeks. Would you be mad if your best friend dated the person you like? probably, considering the person i like is my boyfriend. If my best friend dated my husband, yeah that’d be an issue. She never would though. She doesn’t even like him as a person lol Is anyone over- protective of you? my parents used to be but i think they've decided to chill for the most part. Nobody cares that much about me. Plans for tomorrow? babysitting, and hopefully walmart to get shirts to tie-dye for the summer set. Laundry, Netflix, hopefully finishing the story I’m writing. I really suck at dialogue. Have you made a mistake in the past week? i make mistakes by the hour. Constantly. I don’t recall a specific one though. Do you know anyone named Joshua? yeppp. A couple. Nobody I’ve spoken to in years. Will you be in a relationship in 4 months? more than likely. I’d like to hope so. If my marriage falls apart in the next four months I will most definitely kill myself. If you were paid 1 million dollars to spend the night in a supposed haunted house, would you? for sure. I’d do it for free. What were you doing at 7:00 AM? sleeping. Watching TWD and playing solitaire on my phone. Do you think you can last in a relationship for six months? it's been almost a year. Oh my god. Do you think two people can last forever? perhaps. I have yet to see it happen. Would you put yesterday on repeat and live it forever? nah. No, yesterday sucked. Work was dead and with nothing to do my feet hurt like hell, even with medical grade compression socks on. Did you ever kiss someone with a tattoo? yeah. Yup. I would never go near that person again. I was 19 and stupid and he was a filthy liar. What did you do today? watched maranda, cleaned up the house a little. that's pretty much it. Slept mostly. Picked up the living room. Watched tv. Looked at real estate listings. Talked to my dad. It was a decent day. Last time you laughed super hard? no idea. i laugh all the time. Can’t remember. I tend not to laugh really hard when I’m alone. Which I usually am. Do you find smoking unattractive? nope. but it sucks being around all my friends who smoke when i quit two and a half months ago. It probably is but I’m a chain smoker so I don’t really care. How many people do you fully trust? haha...well...used to be one. now i'm not sure i can completely trust anyone. Still one. Although the person is different. Nobody will ever have my back as much as my dad does. Did anyone see you kiss the last person you kissed? i doubt it. Um...randos at the Pittsburgh airport. Did anyone call you pretty recently? ehh...don't think so. The last person to call me pretty was me. But Mike agreed so I guess him lol Do you look decent when you wake up? depends how my previous night went. That’s a valid answer. I look shitty without makeup no matter what. If my makeup from the previous day isn’t all fucked up after I sleep then I still look good. Are you afraid of falling in love? no. If I was it’d be way too late. Say the last person you kissed was kissing someone right in front of you? i'd probably feel exactly the same way i felt when i woke up from a really bad dream about him yesterday morning. There would be violence involved. Do you have any empty alcohol bottles hidden somewhere in your room? um...i don't believe so. I don’t drink anymore. There are a couple bottles of whiskey in my freezer that haven’t been touched in years, that’s about it. when was the last time you were at the beach? never. Still never. Think back to September, were you in a relationship? yep. I’ve been in a relationship for the past eight Septembers. Almost nine. If you had to delete one year of your life completely, which would it be? i wouldn't. Last half of 2010, first half of 2011. Do you know anyone with such a terribly annoying voice that you can't even stand? most people. Fucking BARB. A lady I work with. She’s so irritating. I’ve even had customers complain to me about her voice, saying they want me to check them out instead. Who was the last person to give you a hug? maranda. Dave. What was the first thing you thought this morning? aksdfmkaoiewhfjdnf;h. “Wtf time is it?” It was actually almost 3pm. But I don’t go to bed till the morning so. What is something that you disliked about your day? uh. everything. The fact that I was pain free most of the day and now I’m not. Have you ever kissed anyone whose name started with a B? How many? nope. Not that I recall.

What about T? How many? no. Nope. What do you currently hear right now? commercials. Carl Grimes. And my cat snoring. Have you ever sent a text to the wrong person? many times. Yep. Awkwardsauce. Who was your last text from? chele. My dad. Did you have any unread text messages when you woke up today? no. Nope, just a voicemail from my pharmacy. Would you rather be able to control the weather or control traffic? weather. Ooh...those are my two biggest fears sooo...Idk if I could pick. Are you faster at text messaging or typing on the computer? computer. Computer for sure. Even with Swype. If you won a trip to a nude beach would you go or give the trip away? i wouldn't go that's for sure...but i'd figure out a way to make money off of it. I stand by that. In your opinion which is the stronger emotion: love or hate? love. of course sometimes when i say i hate someone, it's just because i don't know how to tell them i love them. and furthermore, feeling like i hate someone can make me love them even more. Love. I don’t have the energy for hatred anymore. But I’ll never stop loving what I love. Would you rather sleep for 3 days, or stay awake for 3 days? sleeeeeeeep. Honestly...I don’t know now. I do love my sleep. And I’m lucky to do it for three hours at a time, let alone three days. But I’m also the world’s biggest night owl and am most productive when I should be sleeping. What time did you go to sleep last night? 5am this morning. Like 9am? I don’t remember. When was the last time you had starbucks? never have, never will. I broke my vow and had it exactly one time, a couple years ago. But I refuse to pay five dollars for coffee ever again. Timmy Ho’s and Sheetz are better and half the price. If you were granted one wish, what would you wish for? i don't believe in wishes. Money. What's the tenth text in your inbox say? "is nellie home?" from my mom. “I’m just happy you actually did something about it. Suppose I should return the favor and look into this now.” From Dave, about our respective health issues. Did you stand on your tippy-toes when you had your last kiss? for some reason i always do, even though he's only an inch taller than i am. I must have broken that habit somewhere along the way, because no, I didn’t. Do you like the same person you did a month ago? i've liked the same person for two years. That will never change. Would it be weird if the last person you kissed called you? yeah, cuz he's at work. and he almost never actually calls. He doesn’t call unless something is wrong.  Kissed somebody whose name starts with a C T D or J? d. First name D, last name C, middle name J. All different people. Do you ever think about the past? i think about past, present, and future. Always. Do you believe exes can be friends? sometimes. They most certainly can. Do you currently have a hickey, if so where? i've never had one. Only guy who ever gave me a hickey was a complete tool and I only liked him for his southern accent. He came along a few months after the last time I took this survey, when I was on the rebound. Last night you felt? meh. Bored and in pain. What's your favorite thing to do when you're bored? play solitaire. Read fanfic or watch Youtube. In the past 72 hours have you been under the influence? yup. I haven’t. It’s been months since I even drank a beer. Does anyone know your password besides you? no. Dave knows a couple of them. What're you wearing right now? pajamas and a hoodie. Lilo & Stitch pajama pants, Supernatural Day 2017 shirt. The Hot Topical makes a lot of money from me. What were you doing when you found out Michael Jackson was dead? don't know, don't care. i never liked michael jackson. That. Do you want to see somebody right now? yes. Several people. When's the last time you cried? daily. Um...a couple days ago at work because I was in pain. And probably the same day because I was watching Gilmore Girls: A Year in the Life and it always makes me cry. Would you rather sing or dance in front of 100,000 people? i'd do both. I don’t want to do anything in front of that many people. But I could sing better than I could dance. Would it be more likely of you to fail Science or Math? both. I sucked at both. I was strictly an English and Art kinda gal. Will you regret your next kiss? no. they're so few and far between i can't regret them. not that i would anyway. No way in hell. I relish the ones I can get. Has the last person you kissed ever seen you cry? yeah but he doesn't ever seem to care. All the time. Everything makes me cry. Next time you will kiss someone on the lips? hopefully i'll get to see him tonight or tomorrow night when he gets done working, since i won't see him on his day off this week. Sometime between the hours of 4 and 7am next Thursday.  Your boyfriend buys you flowers, you say? he's not that stupid. he knows i hate flowers. Still true, except he’s my husband now. Do you understand football? understand it and love it. The fooseball is life. I’m so freaking excited for the draft tomorrow. Is the last person you kissed mad at you? he'd have to care to be mad. Our last conversation was about travel and home buying so probably not. The person you have the strongest feelings for dies, do you care? shut up. i'm terrified of that more than anything, because he seems to like to do dumb shit that could get him killed. and i've been having tons of dreams about it lately. What the hell kind of question is that? I’m not a sociopath. Think to the last person you kissed, have you ever kissed them in a car? yes. Our first kiss was in a car. Well not the first kiss but that’s what we spent the entire rest of that night doing lol...There have been many car kisses since then as well. Have you kissed more than ten people this year? one person. Just one. Would you ever date someone who was gorgeous but they had a conceited attitude? no. looks don't matter as much as personality. I didn’t know he was conceited at the time but no, I never would again. Like I said, dude was a tool. If someone called you a bitch would you be offended? more like proud. I AM a bitch. I own it. Do you know a few people that smoke weed? a few? i know less people who DON'T smoke weed. Everybody smokes weed anymore. Except like my parents. Was this the best summer of your life? it hasn't happened yet. but last summer was the best so far. For the record, the summer of 2010 was the worst of my life. And last summer was really good for the sole reason of my birthday week, where I met All Time Low and got to spend it back home with my family and friends. Do you think relationships are even worth it? some are. Hope so. Medicine, fine arts, or law? arts. Same. Have you been through driver's ed yet? safety ed...like six years ago. i still don't have my license though. We didn’t have “driver’s ed”. Safety ed was like six weeks of basics but there was never any practice driving or anything like that. I didn’t get my license till I was almost 23. What do you think about people who party a lot? i think i want to be invited? If they’re my age, they need to grow the hell up. If they’re my sister’s age, I’m sure most of them will get sick of it eventually like I did. When was the last time you dyed your hair? almost a year ago...i've been really lazy with it lately. A little over a month ago? It’s orange with black ombre. I like the concept but next time I’m getting it done professionally. Is there a movie you've seen countless times? more than one. Several. I tend to watch most things I like over and over again instead of watching new things. What do you need to go shopping for? i need to stop shopping. Haha...that’s a good answer. But I do need some more compression socks. Have you ever read Twilight? no. Yes, and dammit, I liked it. I still curse myself for that. Is there something that happened in your past that you hate talking about? yeah. Nah, I’ll talk about anything. I’m pretty self-centered. If Britney Spears came to your town, would you go see her concert? hell yes i love her. I’d be there with bells on. Meet anybody new this week? nope. but i'm going to on wednesday. Idk if customers at work count. I don’t leave my house unless it’s for that. Do you dislike anyone at this moment in time? everyone. Yeah, the cunt that thought it’d be cool to cheat on her boyfriend with my best friend and then screw him over as well. Any up coming events you're excited about? the concert on wednesday, and my birthday. Going home next week and house shopping. Does anyone hate you? sure. I guess so. Don’t matter to me.