#(don’t know how much of this little idea I’ll keep but it’s funny regardless)

[oorangesoda]

If it’s of interest to anyone, I like to think Gus and Emily had an ongoing bet for how long it would take for Cal and Shane to get together and a completely separate bet on who was gonna crack first. Emily ends up winning both

[beastofburdenxo]

Raising Catherine Chapter 4

True feelings have come out, and Tommy takes what is his.

SMUT MINORS DNI 2.1k words. Tags: Fingering, praise, dirty talk, possessive Tommy, multiple orgasms, P in V, unprotected sex, first time, pet names, innocence kink

Tommy didn’t sleep well that night, but that is nothing new. He kept his arm around his girl all night, keeping her close. Part of him was relieved that the feelings he had were mutual, the other part he felt like such a dirty old man. In a way, things were even more complicated now. Now what? Do they date now? After pretty much raising her? Do they get married? Do they keep this a secret? How will the family take this? He didn’t know what to do. He partly hoped that she doesn’t remember what happened last night, and things can be somewhat normal, for her anyways. Things will never be the same for Tommy now regardless. Catherine moves in her sleep, turning towards tommy now. She wiggles closer to him, putting her head on his bare chest with a sigh. She softly kisses his chest, “Are you awake Tommy?” she gently asks. He strokes her hair. “Now you know the answer to that love, I don’t sleep much. How are you feeling?”  

“I’m alright I guess; I slept like the dead. My head feels funny though.” Tommy chuckles, “That’s the whiskey for you, I’m just glad you're not sick to your stomach.” he pauses, deciding the route he should go with this, “You remember your party, don’t you? Or did Arthur have you three sheets to the wind?” he joked. “No, I remember it. The pretty cake Polly made, the music, the dancing. I remember climbing into bed with you and you were all grumpy about it.” She averted her eyes, not wanting to say more in case it was all a drunken dream. He showed her his hand, “I broke a pen all over me, and you tried to clean me up half asleep and drunk.” he smiled, kissing her forehead, “I believe the rest of it I'll have to just wear off.” He notices her faraway look, and nudges her, “Hey now, what it is?” Catherine lets out a shaky breath. “Did I do something wrong last night, Tommy? I feel like something happened. I remember feeling really good in your bed, and you came out of nowhere, and you were all happy....” 

Tommy grabs her chin, making eye contact. “You did nothing wrong, sweetheart. I promise. You just had a happy dream about me last night, and I accidentally walked in on it. No big deal, you are a big girl now, it’s normal.” Her face turns crimson imagining what Tommy walked in on. Tommy holds her tight, whispering, “You looked so pretty love, like an angel. I didn’t want to scare you, so I let you have your moment. When I heard my name come out of your mouth, it felt like my body was on fire. I couldn’t take my eyes off you. So innocent for me. Oh, Cathy, I love you so much. You have no idea.” Silent tears fell down Catherine’s cheeks at his confession. “I love you too, Tommy. I've wanted you since I was 16. No other man cares about me like you do. You are always there, for whatever I need. I’d be so good to you, Tommy. I’ll take care of the house, the cooking, hell I'll even light your smokes for you...” Tommy interjects, wiping the tears from her eyes, “What are you telling me, Cathy love?” Sniffling, she replies, “I’m telling you I don’t want no other man, Tommy, I want you. I don’t want to leave here and marry off; I want to be your little girl forever. Please keep me, Tommy. Please.”  

Tommy sits up, pulling her onto his lap, “You’ll always be my little girl, no matter what. Honestly, I've been dreading the day that you would leave me. If being by my side would make you happy, then you’ve got it. It's an honor and privilege taking care of you, love, and I'll do it till the day I die. You do realize that this isn’t normal right? That people will talk?” Cathy buries her face in the crook of his neck, “People already talk, Tommy, I hear it. And I don’t care. I really don’t. Why do you think the townspeople leave me alone? Because I belong to you, Tommy Shelby.” Tommy gently pulls her face towards his own, lips almost touching, “Say that again, sweetheart.” She gazes into his bright electric eyes, “I belong to you, Tommy Shelby. I am yours.” She leans forward, their lips finally touching. A soft moan comes out of Tommy, finally this is happening. Her kisses are just as sweet as she is. After a while of passionate making out, she breaks apart from his mouth, “That was my first kiss, you know.” She shyly admits with a giggle. He kisses her neck, making his way up to her ear. The fact that he will be her first everything is extremely arousing to him. She really does belong to him, now and forever. He purrs in her ear, “Did you like it love?” With a gasp at feeling his mouth on her earlobe, she replies, “Yes, Tommy.” He moans in her neck at her admission, “There is so much more to enjoy with me, love. Can I make you feel good?” 

Her hips aimlessly grind on his leg at his words, dying for friction. “Yes, but I don’t know what to do, you’ll have to help me.” Her lack of experience is making her nervous now. Tommy rubs her sides as he is back to kissing her pretty face, “It’s okay, I've got you sweetheart. Just enjoy me, I'll do all the work, love. Here, let me help you out.” He grabs her hips and moves her back and forth on his leg with more pressure than before. Nice and slow, she is already leaking onto his leg, and he can feel it. His face moves to her chest, inches from her hard nipples, demanding attention. “Does that feel good?” he asks her. She is in her own little world, so he doesn’t get a reply. The look of total pleasure on her face is answer enough. With a chuckle he mumbles to himself, “I’ll take that as a yes.” as he takes her nipple in his mouth. The new sensation brings her back to reality as she grips his hair with a cry of his name. Between his soaked leg, and hearing her whimper his name, it takes everything in him not to come in his pants. “Oh god, you're so wet for me, I think you are ready for more aren’t you? Raise up a little love, let me give you some more.”  

She shakily raises up, as his hand goes between her legs, pushing her panties to the side. “I’m going to gently put one finger inside love, and you are going to move up and down it. Just ride my finger for me, okay? Can you do that sweetheart?” She nods as she kisses him with need. His strong finger gently slides into her, her walls fluttering at the intrusion. “That’s it love, good job. So warm and wet for me, just like that.” he moans, “Ride my fingers angel, you can do it.” Catherine slowly moves up and down, getting used to this new sensation. Tommy’s finger feels so good inside her, she wants more though. He looks at her face full of lust for him, “I think you can take another one, don’t you?” He slides another finger in, she gasps at the filling stretch. “Just ride my fingers, sweetheart, let it feel good. This is all for you.” She moves with more confidence at his encouragement. Tommy is watching her in amazement. “Such a pretty girl for me. That's it, love, do what feels good to you.” His thumb finds her clit, gently rubbing her as she rides. She lets out a long moan as her thighs begin to shake. “T-T-Tommy...” She sputters out as her high begins to build. “Yes, sweetheart, I'm right here. Let it go. Let it all go.” He growls in her ear at feeling her squeeze his fingers, “I’ve got something even bigger for you love, I'm all yours. Let me have it sweetheart, let it go.”  

Catherine falls apart at his words, collapsing into his chest. Tommy wraps his other arm around her as his fingers stay inside her. She cries his name repeatedly, as she comes all over his lap. “Yes, angel, there you go. I know you needed that, huh?” He gently pushes her onto the bed, as he takes what little clothes she still has on off her body. “You are so beautiful, all for me, right?” She jerks slightly in aftershocks of her orgasm, face flushed in pleasure. “Yes, Tommy, all for you. I’m all for you, all yours.” Tommy takes his pants off and kneels in front of Catherine, his hard cock throbbing for her, pointing at his navel. He slowly strokes it, as Catherine can’t take her eyes away from it. “This is what you do to me, love.” he moans, “This is what you do. You turn me on so bad, you have no idea, sweetheart.” She opens her legs as he comes nearer. Both are dripping in need for each other, as she reaches out to touch him. “No sweetheart, don’t touch,” he tells her, “I won’t last with your soft little hands, I must be inside you. You can touch me all you want later, okay?” She smiles up at him, as he raises one of her legs to his hip. She is fully exposed to him now, as he takes his cock and rubs it between her lips and on her clit. They both moan at the touch. “Tommy... it feels so big. It won’t fit!” He bends down to kiss her lips, holding her face. “Yes, it will love, I'll be gentle I promise. You can do it, you’re my girl right? All mine?”  

“Yes, all yours, Tommy.” She gasps as the head enters her, stretching her more than his fingers ever could. She claws at his shoulders as the discomfort rises. “Easy, sweetheart, I've got you. It's okay,” he coos as he gives her gentle kisses, “Such a big girl for me, my big girl.” He rubs her thighs to distract her from the pain. “Tommy... it hurts!” Catherine cries, as he is almost fully inside her. “I know baby, I'm sorry. You are just so little. Do you want me to stop? The worst part is almost over.” Tommy kisses her neck as the last inch is finally inside. “There you go, sweetheart, I'm in. You did so good for me, love. Such a good girl.” Tommy stays still, letting her get used to him, giving her praises and kisses to help relax her. “Oh, angel, you feel so good. So little wrapped around me. My big girl, all for me. Relax, sweetheart. I’m right here, I've got you, forever. I'm not going anywhere.” Catherine finally relaxes at the intrusion, gazing into his loving ocean eyes as he stays inside her. She strokes his sharp cheekbones, “I’m okay, Tommy, you can move now.” With a deep passionate kiss, he slowly pulls halfway out and slowly back in. Tommy moans her name, “You take me so well, fuck. I’ll do anything to take care of you, I promise, I'd kill for you, love, you know that?” All Catherine can do is moan and say his name, the new sensations overwhelming her small body.  

“All mine, you're my girl, no one else will have you. You belong to me, I'm the only man that can make you feel like this. I’m the only one that can make you come like this. Do you hear me, love?” He growls as he hits that undiscovered spot inside her. “Yes, Tommy, yes, I’m all yours, all yours. Please Tommy, I love you!” Catherine’s back arches as she comes for the second time that morning, screaming his name. “Oh fuck, I love you too!” Tommy hit his release, tears in his eyes at how good it feels. She has been officially claimed by Tommy Shelby, she is his and he is hers, now and forever. He gently pulls out of her sore body, pulling her to him. “That was even more amazing than I could have ever imagined,” Tommy mumbled sleepily, “I love you, Cathy. You aren’t going anywhere now, most definitely. You are more addicting than any opium.” He kisses her forehead, as she chuckles, “You can’t get rid of me Mr. Shelby even if you wanted to, you are forever stuck with me, you said it yourself! I don’t want anyone else.” She rubs his sweaty chest as they both drift off to sleep. Just how it should be, Tommy and his little girl. Forever.  

[quibbs126]

Okay the Earthspark megop Terran kid has wormed his way back into my brain once more, at least today. He may be gone yet again by tomorrow

Not much has changed other than I really don’t know what to make his alt mode, and I still don’t have a name for him

Could someone help me on this maybe please? I don’t really know who to ask outside of tumblr itself

Well I mean, I guess my real life friend, but I don’t know when I’ll be meeting her next, so the question still stands

But I do have at least a couple more details in my brain for him now. Like for example, I’m like 99% sure he’s gonna stay a boy

One, I think I’ve solidified that he’s at least slightly bigger than Megatron and Optimus, if not a little more than that (I know the Terrans are supposed to be smaller than the Cybertronians, but let me have this. Say it’s because either the fact that both of them touched it or because they’re big and have things like the Matrix it makes the Terran bigger than usual. Or because they’re huge Cybertronians)

So with that in mind, I imagine he needs a pretty big alt mode. Granted, I don’t know how big, since this series doesn’t entirely adhere to robot sizes matching the vehicle mode. Like Megatron’s a big aircraft while Optimus is a semi truck, which is also big for a car but I don’t think is nearly the same size, and yet the two are relatively the same height in robot form. But regardless, a big alt mode would probably be best

Also I do want it to be a vehicle (in part bc I don’t know what to do otherwise though)

Another thing, more specific, is I’m imagining him with big gauntlets on his arms, sort of like Vi from League of Legends (she was kind of the inspiration for this idea). They’re part of his body, not removable armor, though he might be able to detach them like rocket arms in a fight. He can probably also shoot lasers out of them too. So his arms should probably be something significant in his alt mode, or his alt mode gives him a reason why his arms would be like that in some way

Actually, I think that’s all the new details I have, at least in so much that they help this quest for an alt mode for this character

I guess I could give personality things as well? But I don’t have much fleshed out, in part because I feel like I keep ending up recreating Jawbreaker or someone too similar. Best I have so far is that he’s energetic and optimistic, but he also does not know his own strength, and he is very powerful, so he ends up doing damage when he doesn’t mean to. It’s something Megatron and Optimus are trying to work with him on. Though this all might still change anyways because I still don’t know if it works. It still might be too similar to another character

Edit: oh wait, other small things because they might be useful too. So I’m keeping this idea he has an odd fixiation with the earth/underground. Mostly because something in my head finds this “he yearns for the mines” concept to be funny and it will not let it go. Anyways, so he likes punching rocks and cliffs and such, maybe because they’re things that don’t instantly crumble under his punch. He may end up creating intricate tunnel systems because he likes punching the earth. And/or he’s got a slight weird sixth sense for things underground and the places he punches might end up leading to somewhere useful. But maybe not always, sometimes it is just punching a random cliff side. I don’t know, it’s a bit odd and random, but I do want to keep in some way this underground/earth related element to his character. Though maybe that’s too limiting in his design choices

I still need to find a name too. I should probably try to at least make that myself. But like another thing with the Terrans is that their names seem to be more Earth things (though that’s not entirely untrue of Cybertronians either), and I don’t know what to do with that angle. I keep making more robot sounding ones, or ones I’m pretty sure another character already has

[tyk-tyk-tyk]

How about, for the meme: good ol’ lodger, and Maxwell if you want to do another!! :3

Sorry this took so long to answer! Going to start with The Lodger, and I’ll put Maxwell from Don’t Starve under the cut!

First impression

I remember the most striking thing was the art style, his eyes were absolutely haunted and I loved them. His design alone is what got me looking at the game.

Impression now

He’s such a little gremlin. I mean, come on, look at him! He’s such a little shit being an unreliable narrator, and I think that’s my favorite character flaw I’ve ever had the pleasure of observing and writing.

Favorite moment

Which leads into the next point, I think the most haunting part of the game was The Lodger constantly contradicting himself and abruptly saying “Help me.” with no other explanation. I know the gameplay is clunky, grindy, and completely unfair—But I will ride and die for the atmosphere at least.

Idea for a story (Mentions of disease/rotting/minor horror elements! Skip to the next one if you don’t want to read this!)

I’ve had this draft called ‘doppelgänger’ in my WIPs for ages, but it was meant to be The Lodger finding a wounded stranger out in the woods and nursing them back to health. There’s a funeral custom about draping things over mirrors, so The Lodger hasn’t seen his own reflection in years. Prattles on and on about how this poor stranger should have taken better care of themselves, they look uncanny! Their eyes look hollowed in and their skin is a deathly pale and their red hair looks like it’s falling out—

By the time he realizes it’s a living and breathing copy of himself, he’s already invited it into his home, and he has to decide what to do from here on out.

Unpopular opinion

Is this fandom even big enough for popular opinions I think the lodger would be an antivaxxer in modern times, you know bro would PANIC about conspiracy theories

Favorite relationship

Him and his bed (and if you’re not with the government, I’ll ship him with basically any other man even if it’s toxic just to try and experiment with what he would do in a relationship. Please for the love of god keep him away from the girl in the woods though her Steam card is LITTLE GIRL not grown woman, that’s his daughter not his date)

Favorite headcanon

I always struggle to decide which is more heartbreaking and plausible, if The Lodger is some guy that a nearby town/city sees every now and then and never sees him again for months on end, or if no one even knows he exists and his house is just a stop in the middle of nowhere.

Though while we’re on that note, I think regardless he is insanely lonely and LOVES company of any kind. To the point where it can be kind of overbearing. But he’s trying his best.

Now, about that Maxwell guy

First impression

I haaated him, but only because I always imagined him smugly laughing every time I died to something stupid in Don’t Starve. Everything felt like concentrated spite towards my journey to the throne (that never even got past King of Winter)

Impression now

I like him so much as a character. I remembered unlocking Maxwell with cheats just to run through his dialogue in game (even though I could have just looked at the wiki, I wasn’t smart okay) and watching someone else get to his throne. It was such whiplash for me to realize that someone who (allegedly) was taunting me was actually just in an insane amount of endless misery.

Favorite moment

“Even the king is bound to the board.” Such an iconic line for me.

Also any time he whines about physical labor or his clothes getting dirty always makes me laugh

Idea for a story

It’s hard to say, I don’t tend to do a lot of writing for Maxwell since my amazing and most best friend in the world often writes him. Though I’ve always found the concept of Wilson interacting with William funny. I think once upon a time an ancient moon ago, I wanted to draw a mini comic where Wilson and William were spying on Maxwell using bush hats. Wilson goes ‘Alright, go talk to him.’ and William replies ‘No way, I scare me!’

Sigh, simpler times.

Unpopular opinion

I haven’t interacted with the fandom in LITERALLY YEARS so this could have changed, but I think people like to try and pull like… Internet cancel culture on this old man. Saying that just because he was evil once, he’s evil forever. And while I don’t think he’s entirely sunshine and rainbows, the man was poor and I get why he literally made a deal with the devil. You can tell that he never wanted at least Charlie to get involved, and he quite literally was gaslit back into the dark side, so. I dunno, be kind to your elders or something.

Favorite relationship

Initially I was so off-put by Maxwil, but as I’ve gotten older I think it’s one of my favorite opposites attract tropes.

I love Maxlie more than anything though. 10/10 friends to lovers to enemies to lovers, no notes.

Favorite headcanon

I think he likes to do magic tricks for the kids. Or anyone who will watch and won’t make fun of him. He may put on a refined gentlemanly front but I think he’ll always be a nerd.

[autumnshighlady]

I’ve Always Liked to Play With Fire (part 5)

NESTA ARCHERON X FEMALE!READER (future Neris x reader)

summary: You arrive in the Spring Court, and things take a drastic turn

warnings: inner circle slander, sorta pro-Tamlin pls don’t kill me

word count: 8.5k (y’all said you liked long chapters)

DO NOT REPOST ANYWHERE

a/n: please do not come at me for defending Tamlin. He is not one of my favourite characters or anything BUT I do think that he gets treated unfairly so this fic is meant to address that and see things from his perspective. i hope you enjoy this chapter regardless, it took me forever haha

feedback is appreciated, just no hate pls! these are just my opinions, i’m more curious to see how you all like the writing and characterization and storylines!

part 1

part 2

part 3

part 4

read on ao3

Spotify playlist

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“I expect a regular report once a week, and any important updates as soon as they come up.” The High Lord’s voice droned on and you resisted the urge to roll your eyes. The meeting had been going on for half an hour, which was half an hour too long in your opinion. The Inner Circle had gathered to discuss your working in the Spring Court. A few months ago, you’d have squirmed under their gaze, like a lamb surrounded by lions. Little did they know that this time you were the lion, and they were the lambs.

You hoped they all suffered at the end of it in some way.

“And you remember how to reach us?” Feyre said, snapping you out of your trance.

“I do,” You said through gritted teeth. “Because Azriel and I have gone over it a million times, as well as what to do if it doesn’t work. Can we move on?”

“I hope you’re taking this seriously, girl.” Amren spoke up from her chair in the corner. Her silver eyes glared at you with distaste, so you glared back.

“Why are you even here?” You challenged the tiny female. “You apparently don’t have any powers anymore so what do you contribute other than just being a cunt?”

“Enough, (Y/N).” Rhysand spoke up before Amren could fire back. “Amren has earned her seat at this court and you will show her respect.”

“I’m the one risking my ass for you guys,” You snapped. “I’ll respect her when she stops glaring at me from the corner and making snide remarks.”

“I thought you trained her properly, Azriel.” Amren quipped, ignoring you. “She should know when to hold her tongue.”

Azriel audibly sighed, “We covered just about everything except that.” He mumbled.

“But she is ready for this, is she not?” Feyre asked the Spymaster.

“As she’ll ever be.” He grumbled in response.

“Then it’s settled.” Rhysand said, clasping his hands together. “Azriel will winnow (Y/N) to the border of the Spring Court. From there, she will make her journey to the manor. Our reports say Tamlin hasn’t even bothered to check on her village since it was attacked, so it will be easy for him to believe that she survived and has been laying low the past while. She will offer him her services, and keep us updated on the High Lord. His movements, any mention of working with anyone outside his own court, the likes. Any questions?”

“I have one.” You piped up. The inner circle turned to look at you – Mor’s eyebrows were raised, and Azriel’s were pleading as if begging you to not start anything else.

“Go ahead.” Feyre said hesitantly.

You resisted the urge to grin at how the rulers of the Night Court tensed in anticipation. “So my salary,” You continued. “How is that gonna work? Do you guys pay monthly or?”

Azriel rubbed his face with his hands, and Amren rolled her eyes. You found it funny how the richest fae you knew groaned at the idea of paying someone for their work – granted it was a more than fair wage, but given how much wealth they possessed, you knew their accounts wouldn’t feel its impact.

“You will be compensated upon your return to our Court.” Rhysand said, violet eyes glaring at you.

“Which will be?” You asked, meeting his stare.

“When we are satisfied that Tamlin is no longer an additional threat. Once we have taken care of other matters, you will be relieved of your duties and can return here so we can deal with him on our own.”

“Right. But that could be months, years even. I’m not waiting that long to get paid, especially since I have no money. I’ll need it anyway to get by in Spring Court since Tamlin probably won’t have much to pay me.”

You could feel the annoyance simmering off the High Lord as he spoke. “Fine, we’ll get it sorted out. Just do what you have to do and we’ll take care of the rest, ok?”

You nod, shuffling on your feet. To them, the action may have appeared nervous, but you were excited. You finally got to go home, but it was more than that, you finally got to give the Inner Circle a taste of their own medicine. Granted, you felt a bit guilty – Cassian was kind enough, and Nesta did care for him in some way. And as annoying as Azriel was during training, he hadn’t really done anything wrong either.

But you remembered what Mor had said to Nesta, that she’d fit right in with the Court of Nightmares. Nesta had filled you in on the Morrigan’s past, how her family sold her into marriage with Eris, only to dump her at the Autumn Court border with a note nailed into her womb saying she was Eris’ problem. Apparently it was Azriel who found her after Eris supposedly left her there, and thus her rise to power under Rhysand’s protection.

Mor, who had endured the cruelest of horrors in the Court of Nightmares that you would not wish upon anyone, had told Nesta that she belonged there. In a place that sold women like cattle and tortured them if they did not obey their fathers or husbands. It disgusted you how Mor could survive that only to tell a suffering female that she would deserve such a fate, not counting the fact that she herself had done nothing you know of to help other females like her who didn’t have a High Lord as a best friend.

Then there was Amren. You were underwhelmed upon meeting her �� since losing her powers in the war, the mighty creature was just a bad-tempered High Fae female who did nothing but make rude comments to people. You honestly couldn’t figure out why she was even feared anymore.

You didn’t like Mor and Amren, but they were not the true targets of your revenge. Feyre had destroyed your court and was never held accountable for it. While Rhysand didn’t have any part of it, you still saw him as a controlling dick – he made no effort to help those in his court who weren’t part of his precious circle, and clearly did not care about the fates of innocents if he praised his mate for ruining their lives. Yes, Feyre and Rhysand would be hit hardest by your plan, and you were glad for it.

“Good luck,” Feyre said, nodding at you. “And thank you for doing this.”

“I’m not doing this for you.” Was all you replied with before following Azriel out of the room.

I’m doing this for me and Nesta. You added in your head.

*********************

Azriel winnowed you to the edge of the Spring Court border, as promised. You were clad in a Spring Court attire designed to look like one of your old dresses, since you obviously couldn’t appear in any clothes from the Night Court. You had been given a small sack with a few coins, stale bread, and a canteen of water – again, designed specifically to look like you had salvaged it from your village’s wreckage.

As the sweet air of the Spring Court filled your senses, you swallowed nervously. For the first time in a while it hit you what you were actually doing. You pushed aside your doubts before they could form, reminding yourself of why you were doing this.

Nesta and I need to get away from the Night Court. It’s suffocating us both and we need a way out, which may be through Eris. I just have to get to Eris and convince him to help us, then we’ll be free.

You thought of Nesta again and your last interaction with her. You had to consciously make an effort not to touch the star that was magically inked onto your sternum, remembering the kiss you shared with her after the spell. Your lips still tingled with the taste of her mouth, how soft yet passionate it was–

“You didn’t hear a word I just said, did you?” Azriel’s deep voice snapped you out of your trance.

“No, sorry.” You mumbled, earning a huff.

“As I was saying,” He continued irritably. “You should reach the manor in less than a day from here. Take that path–”

“I know my way around my own court.”

“Yet you have spent several months in Night so I am simply reminding you.”

“Reminder taken.”

You felt a hand grip your shoulder, turning you around and forcing you to look at him. Azriel’s hazel eyes bore into yours. “Are you sure about this?” He said, eyes scanning your face as if he was searching for something. “If not, that’s ok. We can take you back and figure something else out–”

“No.” You cut him off, almost too quickly. The spymaster did not show any reaction to your interjection, but you’d be stupid to think that he wasn’t analyzing and calculating your every move. “I can do this. I just don’t like lying to Tamlin.”

Azriel blinked, and you weren’t sure if he believed you or not so you continued. “I’ve known him since I was a child. I worry he’ll see right through me.”

The spymaster nodded slowly before answering. “Remember what I taught you. And just do your best – Tamlin knows you, use that to your advantage. He’s not himself, and he won’t be doing what’s in the best interest for his court. Perhaps you can nudge him in the right direction, but if he’s doing anything that threatens the Night Court of Prythian we need to know. I hope you understand that.”

You froze at his last words. I hope you understand that. A pit of dread formed in your stomach as one of your worst fears began to crawl into your mind. Azriel was not entirely fooled by you, and you knew it. Your mouth went dry as you met his gaze. He stared at you no differently than he had before, but you knew that as a spy those shadows were always whispering to him, always picking up on details that you may have missed….

No, You assured yourself. If he knew about my plan with Nesta I wouldn’t be here. No way. He may suspect something, but he can’t have any evidence to act on yet. I have more time.

“I do understand.” You said as calmly as you could. “That doesn’t mean I have to like it.”

Ever so slightly, Azriel’s gaze softened. “Those of us in this line of work rarely do.” He said.

“Then let’s hope I don’t have to be in it for long.” You said, silently adding, for many reasons.

“We shall.” Azriel said, before straightening up and stretching his wings slightly. “Well in that case, good luck (Y/N).”

You gave him a small smile before turning away from the shadowsinger, heading down the path through the forest. You knew Azriel was gone by now, but felt his shadows linger as if they were watching you.

*********************

After a day, you reached Tamlin’s manor. It was an unnerving journey to say the least – the normally buzzing forest was quiet, as if all happiness had been drained from it. The birds rarely sang, the flowers looked sad and withered. There were no happy cries of children playing in the streams – the whole Spring Court had gone quiet. The manor was overgrown with vines, stretching across cracks in the once pristine walls. There were few guards, most hardly noticed you as you walked through the gate. Daeron, a sentry friend of your father’s, only glanced up at you as you walked by, a hollow look in his eyes. He said nothing, just looked at you like you were a ghost.

The fact you were able to get to and enter the manor with no resistance was worrying. Tamlin must be in even worse shape than you thought to let it get like this. Even the inside of the manor was overgrown in many places, thorns and vines creeping into the spaces.

“My Lord?” You called out, not wanting to startle Tamlin if he even was home. Carefully, you set your bag on the table, noting how tendrils of dust skimmed the air as you did so.

The manor was a ghost of its former glory. Paintings on the wall were broken, some gone entirely. The shiny floors were dull, pieces of splintered wood littering across it threatening to pierce the bare feet or anyone who dares tread here. The windows were dusty, the room devoid of any life. If Tamlin was living here, it was hard to tell.

You wandered over to the end of the table that didn’t have dust on it. A kettle sat there, along with a singular cup that hadn’t been washed yet. Gingerly, you reached out your hand to touch it, and the metal was still slightly warm against your skin.

Well, at least you knew somebody was home.

“Tamlin?” You called out once again.

A heavy set of footsteps sounded from the stairwell in response. You turned to face them, and watched as the High Lord of the Spring Court descended.

His blonde hair was shaggy and as lifeless as the room around him, and a layer of scruff had grown around his face. The green eyes that had shone with kindness when you last saw them were haunted, looking at you like Daeron had – as if you were a ghost. Not that he looked much better than one himself.

“High Lord.” You greeted him, bowing your head. No matter what state his manor was in, he still remained the leader of your court, and you would at least try and show him respect.

“(Y/N)?” Tamlin rasped as if he hadn’t used his voice in weeks. The bags under his eyes were accentuated in the dusty light of the room.

“It’s me.” You said quietly. Tamlin only blinked.

“I thought you were dead.” He said in a monotone voice. “Your village burned.”

You sucked in a breath. “Did you come looking for me?” Maybe the Night Court’s reports were wrong, and he did come looking. Part of you hoped he had, that the strong High Lord you had known was still in there. But your plan rested upon Tamlin not caring enough to go to the massacred villages.

Tamlin laughed heartlessly in response. “No, I didn’t.” He said. “Everyone’s dead. Or gone. Too hard to keep track, there’s no point.”

Part of you was angry at him for not caring, but the other part was sad. The male you admired growing up, had always thought would protect you, didn’t care enough to see if you were dead or alive. Feyre’s damage to the Spring Court was more extensive than you realized, and it filled you with rage.

“So you’ve just given up then, is that it?” You questioned. Rhysand had warned you that Tamlin was unstable and violent, but all you saw now was a broken male who had lost his desire to fight. “You knew me well, and when you heard my village was slaughtered you didn’t even come to see for yourself?”

“My reports said there were no survivors, what else would I have done?” Tamlin snapped, gazing at something in the distance that wasn’t there. “Clearly they were wrong. How did you get out, (Y/N)? And why are you here after all this time?”

“My family is gone.” You said quietly, causing Tamlin’s gaze to return to you. “Everyone is gone. I barely got out, and it took me a while to heal on my own. I could have healed faster if you had come, but I laid low for a while. I wasn’t sure if Hybern was gone, but yesterday I gathered what I could and came here.”

There were a few minutes of silence, both of you staring at each other. Whether or not he knew you were lying, you couldn’t tell – or even if he cared. Tamlin simply looked empty, a husk of his former self.

“I am sorry.” He muttered before turning to go.

“I have nowhere else to go.” You pleaded, hoping he’d let you stay. The High Lord didn’t even spare you a glance.

“Make yourself at home, there’s plenty of space.” Was all he said before retreating back up the staircase.

If Rhysand really thinks he’s a threat, he’s insecure or just plain stupid. You thought bitterly. Yes, Tamlin had made major mistakes that made you lose respect for him – locking up Feyre was beyond wrong, and you knew it. Letting Hybern in was wrong, although Nesta told you that Feyre had sent Tamlin a letter saying to stop trying to get her back, yet as far as Tamlin knew, Feyre was still illiterate. Therefore, it wouldn’t be hard for him to assume that Rhysand was behind the letter.

The High Lord of Spring wasn’t perfect, he had let his trauma from Under the Mountain cloud his judgment and Feyre paid the price for it. But he did not deserve this, he did not need to have his court wiped out from under him to learn his lesson.

You would make Feyre pay, if only to see the look on the Inner Circle’s faces when they realized what you had done.

*********************

You had chosen a room a few doors down from Tamlin’s, right next to Lucien’s chambers. With the help of a few remaining servants, you had dusted and cleaned the room, changing the old sheets to fresh ones. It would be your first night back in the Spring Court in almost six months, you realized. It made your chest ache as you thought of your friends and family. There would be no more river picnics with them or afternoon teas, no more lounging in the fields with your mother…

A tear found its way down your cheek, but you quickly swept it away and opted to get ready for bed. After changing into a nightgown, you laid on the soft mattress, gently resting your fingers on the tattoo on your chest. It was warm to the touch, as if begging to have its magic used.

Nesta? You thought, not quite sure of how to reach her.

(Y/N?) Her reply came into your head after a few seconds. Can you hear me?

I can hear you. The spell worked.

Clearly. Are you okay? Did you make it to Spring?

Yes. It’s a mess here. Tamlin isn’t even trying to keep it together. I don’t think he’ll be a problem. The hardest part will be getting Eris on our side.

No, the hardest part was getting you out of Night. And you did it.

I wish I could have taken you with me.

I do too. But it’s not so bad here with just Cassian and the priestesses in the library. I made a friend, Emerie. She’s Illyrian, you’d love her. We’re all training together.

As happy as you were Nesta was getting along well in Night and was having extra support, you couldn’t help the twinge in your chest.

Hey, none of that. Came Nesta’s voice. I still miss you, and I still want to get the hell out of here.

It’s not that, You assured her. I want you to be getting along as best you can be. I’m happy for you, I just wish I was there joining the fun. Wait, you could feel what I felt?

Oh it’s not all fun, trust me. And yes, I could. Apparently the spell does that too. Also Cassian was talking today about how good it was you agreed to do this for them. He was completely clueless.

I don’t think Azriel is clueless, You admitted, tracing the lines of the star. I think he’s onto us in some way. Has he said anything that you know of?

No, not to Cassian at least. But he’s Azriel, it’s his job to be suspicious. If he knew what your intentions were, you wouldn’t be in Spring right now.

True. I feel bad, he hasn’t done anything wrong really. His constant brooding is insufferable, but I got used to him. But I know he’ll probably go running to Rhys the second he gets a crumb of evidence against me.

Probably. Cassian’s genuinely trying to help, he thinks it’s for the best. I wish he would understand and take off the Rhysand blindfold, but unlikely.

I get what you mean. They’ve been friends for centuries, Nesta. I don’t think we’ll be the ones to change that. It’s been a really long day and I have lots of work to do tomorrow so I should probably sleep.

Okay. Goodnight. We’ll talk soon.

The warm light that caressed your chest as you communicated with Nesta faded as the line of communication was cut, and you were left with what felt like a hole in your chest. You missed her more than you wanted to admit, but it gave you all the more reason to get your shit together and start your plan.

*********************

The next few days were spent cleaning up the manor with the servants. You assured them that you didn’t need their help, but they did anyway – clearly wanting something to do other than making tea. Slowly, the manor living room began to come back to life. The broken paintings were taken down, and replaced with hanging flower pots. The dust was mostly gone, a process which left you all sneezing for hours. You didn’t see Tamlin once in the three days you worked on the living room.

“He spends all his time upstairs,” One of the servants told you when you asked about him. “We bring him food, and he’ll eat it sometimes in his room then leave the tray outside. But that’s it.”

After trimming the thorns away and preparing a hot meal with the chef, one of the servants came with a tray.

“It’s ok,” You assured him. “We’ll put it on the table.”

“But, miss,” The servant boy stammered. “The High Lord eats in his room every day.”

You snorted. “He’s the High Lord of the Spring Court and he has work to do, he’s going to dine at the table like a normal lord.” The boy looked pale, frightened at the idea of disrupting his Lord’s routine so you bent down and grabbed the tray from him. “It’s okay, you can go home. I will deal with Tamlin and be fully responsible for dinner, ok?”

The boy nodded with relief, scampering off into the kitchens. Sighing, you grabbed the dishes from the counter and lugged them to the table. You and the chef, Mairon, had prepared a harvest salad for dinner with a side of roasted potatoes, chicken, and freshly baked bread. Your mouth watered as you resisted the urge to bite into it, using great self control to place it on the dining room table and leave it there.

You trudged up the stairs to Tamlin’s room, knocking once on the heavy door. No sound came from inside, so you knocked again. “Tamlin!” You yelled, pounding your first on the wood.

The lock clicked and the door swung open, revealing the still haggard-looking High Lord. “You can leave the tray outside the door.”

“No.” You said stubbornly, sticking your foot in the doorway as he attempted to close it. “You’re High Lord of the Spring Court and you’re going to act like it and come eat dinner with me. Now get a move on, I’ll see you down there.”

You did not wait to see his stunned face as you turned on your heel to head back downstairs. If younger you knew you’d spoken to your High Lord that way, she’d probably faint on the spot. You knew that no amount of gentle coaxing would pull Tamlin out of this place he was in, you just prayed he wouldn’t take your head for your approach.

Entering the dining room once again, you took a seat a few feet down from the head of the table. Worry began to eat away at you – what if Tamlin just stayed in his room and completely ignored you? He can’t protect his court in this state, and he clearly won’t even try. You needed to get him back on track, so he could go back to doing his job. As you began piling food onto your plate, you contemplated how your report to Rhysand and Feyre would go. You decided not to tell them that you were actively trying to help Tamlin regain his strength – they’d see it as a threat. Therefore, you concluded that you would have to make things up in your reports. If all the Night Court received was claims of nothing happening, they’d get suspicious and perhaps investigate themselves and that could not happen. If they figured out you were not only helping Tamlin, but actively trying to find a way out of the Night Court’s grasp, you were dead.

Heavy footsteps snapped you out of your thoughts a few minutes later. To your surprise, the High Lord wordlessly took a seat at the head of the table. He still looked a mess and did not glance at you once, but nonetheless reached forth and began to add food onto his plate.

“You could have at least combed your hair.” You remarked after he took a few bites of salad.

“I came down,” Tamlin mumbled between bites. “Is that not enough for you?”

“No.” You said firmly.

The High Lord paused, turning his emerald gaze towards you in a glare. “Excuse me?”

“Your court fell apart,” Your breath tried not to shake at the boldness with which you spoke to the powerful male. “So what? Move on. Not everyone is gone or dead, some of us are still here. And we are not safe, not without your protection.”

“Thanks to Feyre.” Tamlin hissed, bitterness laced in his voice.

“Yes, and I hate her for it. Whatever happened between you two doesn’t matter, she took her revenge out on the rest of us. I don’t care that you’re upset right now, we are the ones who suffered more. The innocent people of YOUR court who never asked to be dragged into any of this.”

Instead of lashing out at you, either with his words or with those talons that hid beneath his skin, Tamlin simply stared at the table.

“Feyre leaving you does not relieve you of your responsibilities as High Lord,” You continued. “You have a duty to your people to protect them no matter what. There are others like me out there who have had their villages destroyed and everything lost. You need to help them and strengthen your court.”

“And this is the part where you tell me that you can help me with that, I assume?” His laugh was empty, as if he didn’t quite believe you.

“I can.” You promised.

“And why would you do that?”

“Because I remember those three days when I was a young girl that you looked after me while my father was sick. And I’m hoping the compassionate High Lord I knew back then is still in there somewhere.”

The only sound in the room was the crackling of the candles at the table. After a few seconds, Tamlin simply turned back to his plate and shoved food in his mouth. Your heart sank a little at his lack of answer, but you cursed yourself for thinking he would even listen to you in the first place. Angrily, you stabbed a potato with your fork, wondering how the hell you were going to help get the Spring Court back on track before you attempted to leave with Eris.

When the High Lord finished his plate, he gulped down the glass of wine in front of him before standing up. He stood up, looking down at you. “Your help would be appreciated,” He said. “But I cannot promise it will do much good. You are, however, welcome to try as you see fit. We have nothing to lose anyways.”

Without waiting for a response, Tamlin left you in the dining room, mind whirling. He had not seemed as enthusiastic as you had hoped, but at least it was something. You were going to help the Spring Court as best you could, with or without Tamlin.

*********************

You ran yourself ragged the next few days, hiring more servants and sentries to help clean the place up. After almost an hour of pestering, you convinced Tamlin to go with some guards to nearby villages to check up on them, offering any aid. Your biggest accomplishment, however, was your idea to turn the manor into a sanctuary. It had dozens of empty rooms, and with many citizens displaced by the recent events, you convinced Tamlin to use this space as a shelter for them. Therefore, when he traveled to the villages again next week, he could offer those who were suffering a place to stay.

The manor’s preparation took a ton of work. Tamlin hardly helped, still preferring to just sulk in his room, but he had given you authority to run the minor things in the manor in his stead. The gardens were being replenished to provide more produce, the windows repaired and skylights fixed, and the floors were polished and finally cleaned. By the third day, it looked less like a haunted house and more like the beautiful manor you had known growing up.

It was on the evening of the third day when you composed your first report to the Night Court. Azriel had provided you with a special set of ink and parchment that you would write on, and the ink would disappear after 15 seconds and the message would be received by the Spymaster. You had spent all of dinner planning exactly what you wanted to say, and decided on a mix of truth and lies. The letter had read:

I arrived at the manor on Sunday – there were almost no guards, and the ones who were there did not care. Tamlin greeted me, he was a bit suspicious but didn’t seem to care much. I have not seen him leave the manor since. He has let me stay here. I surveyed the whole place like you taught me and aside from a few beds in the servants quarters, the manor shows no signs of anyone else being here. I will keep you updated if anything changes.

When the ink disappeared, you had let out a breath. You had left out everything about the manor turning into a sanctuary, an attempt at rebuilding the trust between the citizens and their High Lord. You had just prayed Azriel wasn’t also spying on the Spring Court and would see you were lying.

The next day, you decided to help wash all the sheets in the manor. Taking the basket of wet material from the servant, you lugged it outside where you had set up clotheslines. It was peaceful, with everyone else mostly at the other end of the manor organizing the dining hall, you were mostly alone in the gardens.

Sighing, you gently shook the soft sheets and placed them over the line to dry. It was methodical, a simple mundane task that brought you peace. At the House of Wind, servants had done everything for you, no doubt also acting as spies meant to keep an eye on you and Nesta. You missed the freedom, the autonomy of something as simple as doing your own laundry.

Halfway through the basket, a sudden wave of dread made your entire body go cold, despite the warm sunlight.

“What the…” You gasped, heart racing all of a sudden. Dropping the sheet in your hands, you stared down as a white glow began to peek through your lilac dress. “No, no no no!”

Frantically, you pressed your hands against it, whipping your head back and forth to see if anyone could see you. You cried out as your entire body went ice cold, as if submerged underwater. Your ankle burned like it was being grasped tightly, and whatever it was would not let go.

You remembered what Nesta said when you asked her if the tattoo from your bond would always glow: No. Only when the other is in danger.

Nesta was in danger, you realized. And you were feeling what she was feeling at that moment. Your lungs ached, and you realized the sensation you were experiencing was drowning.

Where is she that she’s drowning? You wracked your brain trying to think of bodies of water in the Night Court that she may be in. But nothing came up, you could only sit there hyperventilating, glowing from your sternum as the magic between you and the eldest Archeron sister consumed you.

“Nesta!” You cried out, gagging before throwing up thick, sludgy water. It splattered on the ground before you like black ink, unforgiving against the soft green grass.

And then it stopped, and the light faded. Everything was quiet, and you felt an eerie calmness washing over you. The air flooded back into your lungs, but your panic was gone – everything was. You stood up, but didn’t feel it – it was like you were not in control of your own body, like someone was pulling the strings for you. But still you felt no panic, no pain, simply nothing. You remained standing in the gardens of the Spring Court, staring into the nothingness. And then the emptiness subsided, and everything came rushing back. You cried out, collapsing into the grass as everything faded to black.

*********************

A soft light crept into your vision as you cracked open your eyelids. Everything was hazy, and your body ached. You looked around as your vision cleared up – you were no longer in the gardens, but in a bed in the healing ward of the manor. The room was empty, save for a table littered with ointments and medicines, and a chair across from you that currently sat a bulking, blonde male.

“Tamlin?” You croaked, voice raw as if you had been screaming.

“(Y/N),” The High Lord sat up, green eyes boring into you. “How are you feeling?”

“Like shit. What happened?”

Tamlin leaned forward, not blinking once as he stared down at you. “I heard you scream, so I came out just in time to see you collapse. I brought you in here, but not before I saw the black water on the ground in front of you. Water which definitely does not come from Spring Court.”

You froze, blood running cold as you tried to remember Azriel’s training about what to do if you got confronted. “I…” You stammered nervously before Tamlin interrupted.

“Spare me any lies, they will do you no good.” He growled. “I know where that water comes from, what dark magic and curses it holds. It magically appears right in front of where you collapsed, after you so miraculously waltzed back in here after months and generously offered to help me.”

“I know how this probably looks-”

“Then you have one chance to tell me what the hell is going on here, (Y/N), or I will get it out of you myself.”

You fiddled with your fingers, debating what to do. Either you could come up with the most miraculous lie of your life and somehow sell it to Tamlin, like Azriel taught you, or you could just say to hell with it and tell him the truth. If you told him the truth, he may not believe you and just lock you up – either way, that could end up with him confronting the Night Court about them sending in a spy. Whether or not you told him you had your own agenda it did not matter, either you betrayed the Inner Circle now to save your own skin, or still pretend to side with them and risk them feigning innocence and abandoning you to face Tamlin’s wrath.

So you decided with the truthful option. “Everything I am about to tell you is the whole truth,” You began slowly, sitting up stiffly. “I swear on my life. Please, hear me out fully.”

Tamlin said nothing, still glaring, but nodded. Taking a deep breath, you began your story. “When my village was destroyed, Lucien found me barely alive. He brought me to the Night Court, since that’s where he was staying. They healed me, but kept me locked up because I was from the Spring Court and they were worried I was sent as revenge for Feyre’s destruction. My first interaction with the High Lord and Lady was…unpleasant. I hated them both, especially Feyre, because they were the reason I lost everything. Feyre may not have killed my family, but she destroyed our court enough to let Hybern do the rest for her. I called them out on it, and they sent me to the House of Wind. I was not allowed to leave, I don’t think they knew what to do with me.

“I met Nesta Archeron there. They had locked her there too, Tamlin. They did the same thing to her that you did to Feyre. We were trapped with no way out unless we wanted to comply with the Night Court’s wishes. After a few weeks we started to speak to each other, and eventually we….. we became friends. She defended me when the Inner Circle arrived for dinner and tried to persuade me to spy on you in return for them saving me. I refused, and Nesta and I became closer after that. We agreed that we needed to get out of the Night Court, so we formed a plan. We staged a fight so that the Inner Circle would think we had grown distant, and I eventually agreed to train with Azriel, and she with Cassian. I agreed to come to Spring under the guise of spying on you, but I swear that is not what I intend. I’ve only sent them one report so far, and all I said was that nothing was happening.”

Tamlin narrowed his eyes. “So you’re admitting to spying on me, then.”

“No, you fool,” You snapped. “Were you not listening? I was lying to them. I would never betray Spring for Night, not after what they did to us. I’m feeding them misinformation to keep them off your back as best I can, at least until it’s time for the rest of the plan.”

“The plan which you better start explaining right now.” Tamlin growled. “Because I don’t see how any of this fits together.”

“Nesta had mentioned that Cassian met with Eris by the border just inside the Spring Court. Which you would know if you cared enough to actually monitor it. I’ve known Eris a long time, and have reason to believe that he could help Nesta and I be free from the Night Court. He hates the Inner Circle almost as much as we do, and would gladly take us in, even if only to rub it in their faces. The plan was that I would agree to pretend to be a spy in the Spring Court so I could get to Eris, since he seems to be here regularly without you knowing. Then I will convince him to help us out, and we can finally be free.”

“So let me get this straight,” Tamlin said, brows furrowed. “You’re double crossing the Night Court for revenge, and trusting you’ll be able to get Eris Vanserra of all people to help you out? What makes you think he won’t just sell you back to them? He’s a cruel, sadistic bastard who shouldn’t be trusted.”

���I know the risks, Tamlin.” You replied, taking another deep breath. “But I don’t care. I will do anything to be free from the Night Court.”

“But you are here. You’re home. You got out already, is that not good enough?”

“I am not leaving Nesta there alone. I have to go back for her.”

A few moments of silence encompassed the room. Your heart raced – you had no idea if Tamlin even believed you. Admittedly, your story was outrageous, even to you. So much had happened within the past few months, you didn’t even know if you would believe yourself if you heard this story. So you sat there, fiddling with the corner of the bedsheet as Tamlin’s immovable gaze stared you down.

“You care about Nesta.” He said quietly.

“I lo…” You stammered. “I care about her a lot. She helped me through literal hell and I cannot just leave her there to end up as another pawn in Rhysand’s games. Nesta deserves better than that, and so do I.”

“And how do I know that you are not making this up?” Tamlin asked. “Granted, it would be an impressive lie. But Rhysand is known to play cruel mind games and mess with one’s memory. And with Feyre apparently having that same ability, I want to believe you (Y/N) but I have to be sure.”

You took another shaky breath. “Nesta and I did a spell,” You began. “An old spell that she found in a book. It gave us a daemati-like line of communication to each other, and was binded by a tattoo on our chests. It glows when the other is in danger, and that’s what happened earlier. We think that in some ways, we can feel what the other is feeling through it. I felt Nesta drowning earlier, and I think I collapsed when she lost consciousness.”

Tamlin frowned. “So is she dead then?”

“No,” You almost shouted. “No, she’s not. I can’t explain it, but I can feel that she’s alive.”

“Interesting, it’s almost as if…” Tamlin muttered, shaking his head before trailing off. “Never mind that. This magic spell, this tattoo…. show me.”

You nodded, closing your eyes and searching for that string that bound you to Nesta. Within a void of darkness you felt it call out to you like the sweetest song, leading you towards its light. So you followed, reaching out your mind to that cord before grabbing onto it and letting its warmth consume you.

Opening your eyes, you were met with a glow peeking through your dress. Tamlin’s face went white as he stared at the mark, visible through the thin fabric of the gown. “Impossible…” He muttered.

“Do you believe me now?” You asked before whispering the disappearing phrase. “Evanescere.”

The glow faded, leaving Tamlin stunned. “I believe you,” He said softly. “I just don’t know what to do now, or what this means for my court. If Rhysand is spying on me, I have every right to confront him about it. But then that puts you at risk, and I am not willing to do that.”

“Thank you.” You whispered, relieved. “I know this is a tough spot for you. You have every right to be angry with them and confront them right now, but I promise it will be worth the wait. I fully intend on letting them know everything I’ve done when I am free, and I will leave you out of it. They do not know that I am helping you now, so when they realize that your court is strong again thanks to me, it will be the cherry on top of everything else we have planned.”

“There’s more to the plan?” Tamlin sighed, exasperated.

“Yes, but it is solely my and Nesta’s own vengeance we will carry out,” You assured him. “You need not know what it is, and I promise you it will not bring harm to the Spring Court. You have my word.”

“You hate them that much?”

“Yes, but not just because of what they did to us. I see the Inner Circle on a mountain of wealth while their people suffer and starve if they do not live in Rhysand’s favourite city, building castle after castle. I hear stories of women being sold and tortured by their families in the Court of Nightmares while their High Lord does nothing to help them, even though his Third in command is a survivor from that very court. I know that the High Lady flies around flaunting her Illyrian wings she shapeshifts into while hundreds and thousands of Illyrian females get their own wings clipped and are kept for breeding while the High Lord and Lady do nothing to stop it because they prefer keeping their pigheaded military leaders happy over the safety and lives of all the females in their court. I look at the Inner Circle and see a group who could do so much good for their Court, but refuse not to because they want to live in their own special bubble, rest of their court be damned. I see a High Lady who is not qualified for the job and only has it because she is mated to Rhysand. I see a High Lord who loves his found family so much he would let the rest of his court burn to keep them happy. Qualities which make for a romantic story, but a shitty leader. That, Tamlin, is why I hate them. And why I cannot wait to see their faces when they realize not everyone wants to bow to Rhysand.”

After your ramble, you took a shaky breath, sipping the cup of water from the nightstand beside you. Your anger you had suppressed for the past week was fired up, a rage that you had burned with for months now and thought you had pushed down enough in the peacefulness of home. But you knew that it would not go away, at least not until you had gotten your revenge.

“I understand your anger, and agree with you completely.” Tamlin said after a few moments before standing up. “The Night Court needs to be humbled. But I will take no part in your plan other than turning a blind eye to whatever you need to do. I have my own bone to pick with the High Lord and Lady, but I will not drag you into it. For now, rest. We will figure this shit out later.”

He left you in the room to sleep, but it would not come. Letting Tamlin in on everything was not part of the plan, but strangely enough it pulled a weight off your chest. You didn’t need to sneak around him anymore. Maybe he could even help you, if you needed it. At least he knew of your plans now and wouldn’t think you were betraying or abandoning him when the time came for you to leave.

Rearranging the pillow, you tossed and turned, desperately trying to reach Nesta.

Nesta? Are you okay?

Nothing. No response, no feeling from the other end of your connection. You knew she was still alive – something deep inside of you knew that you’d be able to tell if she was dead, but her presence lingered somehow. Perhaps she’s just busy. You tried to assure yourself. Eventually, exhaustion overcame you, and you fell into a haunted sleep, plagued by images of dark water and something golden glowing beneath it.

*********************

It had been two days since your conversation with Tamlin, and two days of not hearing from Nesta. You tried to push your worries aside, comforted by the fact that nothing in your chest had snapped indicating she was dead. Wherever she was, you would find her. Even if you had to go to the ends of the earth to do it.

To your delight, the manor’s progress had continued splendidly. More guards were in training, sentries roamed the grounds once again, and servants bustled about. Tamlin had even combed his hair and shaved, which you thanked the Mother for. A few lesser fae from the nearby towns wandered into the manor grounds escorted by sentries. You could tell they were nervous, eyes wide as they saw the High Lord waiting to greet them by the gates. But Tamlin simply smiled, welcoming them warmly and leading them into the manor. After settling in one of the guest rooms, which had been converted to accommodating four people, the first group of citizens joined you for lunch. They practically gasped when they saw that the High Lord would be dining with them, but Tamlin simply gestured for them to sit down and enjoy the vast array of food the cooks had prepared. You could tell his cheer was still more forced than natural, but you were happy that he was making the effort. It was a step in the right direction.

With Tamlin’s guidance, you wrote another report to Azriel a few days later. It said that nothing had changed, except that Tamlin had begun making more appearances to prepare for the Spring Equinox in a few weeks. You sent it off, smirking at yourself.

“I need a break,” You said after the ink disappeared on the parchment. “I’m going for a walk.”

“I’ll come with you.” Tamlin offered as you grabbed your shawl.

“Absolutely not,” You argued. “You have guests to host. You just patrolled the forest so I know it’s safe. I’ll be fine.”

The High Lord opened his mouth to argue, but closed it and simply nodded. You organized your papers before closing the door to your room and heading out in the direction of the forest.

You wandered through the paths, lost in your own thoughts. No word from Nesta still, but you clung onto the fact you knew she was alive. It was all you had keeping you together, thankfully, and you would not fall apart. So you distracted yourself with mentally planning tomorrow’s schedule – what documents needed to be signed and sent out, inventory of supplies, and organizing a meeting to discuss using funds collected from that year’s Tithe to build secure shelters across the Court for those who had lost their homes to Hybern’s armies. It was a brilliant plan, you gave yourself credit. One of the best parts of your revenge was knowing that Feyre had not destroyed the Spring Court, and you longed to see the look on her face when she realized that not only was it coming back stronger than ever, but that it was the perfect example of how leaders should help their people.

Suddenly, a twig snapped a few feet ahead of you, pulling you from your thoughts. You blinked, taking in your surroundings – you were at the old oak tree several miles near the Autumn Court border, not realizing you wandered so far. Reaching under your dress, you slid out the dagger you kept strapped to your thigh as footsteps approached. Your heart raced, praying it wasn’t one of Amarantha’s lingering beasts – while Azriel taught you a lot, you were still no match for a monster.

Instead of a lurking monster, a slender and beautiful figure emerged from the shadows of the tree, red hair elegantly tied back and lips stretched into a smirk you’d recognize from anywhere.

“Why hello there, darling.” Came the velvety voice of Eris Vanserra. “This is quite a surprise, isn’t it?”

-------------------------------- 

taglist (comment if you want to be added): @queercontrarian @kitkat-writes-stuff @moonfawnx @sevikas-whore @weird-and-wise @jemandderkeinenusernamenfindet @kingshitonly @ladyofcherries @eerievixen @readingwritingwatching @peacecoffeeandflowers @a-frog-with-a-laptop @shadowqueen25 @lana08 @highladyofillyria @rachelnicolee @ladespedidas @little-darlingo @manonblackbeakquidditchteam13 @demirunner @terorovaerangi @hauntedandhopeful  @younxii @microwaveallthedemons @fanfictioniseverything @lovra974 

[taintedtort]

oooohhh~ myyyy~ i dont even one to ask it, but characters reaction on older sibling is just so damn good. absolutely sweetest parts are Xiao's ofc and Kazuha's.boy can u imagine this reliefed sigh adeptus would let out when readers sib finally starts coming around?but another thing, how fun it would be since someone for a change felt brave enough to bully damn yaksha???id imagin3 Xiao's face at their first interaction would be priceless.("if i thought that y/n was strange human, her sibling is even more so" kind of tjoughts id imagine). Poor man would probably be so so surprised someone dared to act so harsh around an immortal being..oh well, at least they are not afraid of him, thats probably for the better.and damn u showed Xiao so cute like this, being happy his partners sib finally stops being such a meanie and now he can breath freely..

Kazuha is so sweet trying to win this person over with his natural calm friendly nature and poetic charms.how sweet of him to try and keep being nice even tho readers sib obviously acted unreasonably rude.true sweatheart.and Wanderer,im always happy when authors do not bend characters just for the sake of the sorry, i always feel like saying thank you honestly.because yes, there is no way Wanderer would just play a role (at least not after it doesnt work first time) and be sweet to obviously just as annoyed sibling of readers.he would treat them the same way they treat him, but still he loves his oartner and tries to uphold facade along with the sib as long as it needed.and ofc i love that u showed that Wanderer still not just illogicaly rude, he just blant and perfectly capable to hold a normal conversation.as long as other dont gets on his nerves so much..

Childe probably would be the fastest to actually bond with readers sibling, i agree with your vision on him.i mean, two grown ups gushing about their orecious sibs.tho i still think Ajax would act cautious not to anger the sib, since how dare he touch u too much when they re around?the audacity..noone wants sweet relationship they were building so hard to blow up again.

aand~ im happy u enjoy my feedback!u certainly deserve it, i adore reading your works even when i dont make a request.but honestly i get so exited when i see you post my requests.i hope ill find more ideas to send them to you again.

(btw if you dont mind im curious, how did you call your Wanderer in the game?do u prefer Kabukimono, Scara or Wanderer?aaand do you feel like ever writing for Kabukimono, Wanderers old innocent self, in platonic way ofc?)

- 🦊 anon.

OMG 🦊 ANON THIS IS SO LONG HAHA (not negative, i don’t mind it i think it’s funny)

you’re the sweetest istg 😭🫶🫶 i’ll be honest i wrote the older sibling thing when i was half delirious so i don’t even remember what it was about, BUT IM GLAD IT WAS ENJOYABLE EVEN THO I WAS SO HAZY WHILE WRITING (i didn’t even remember writing childe until you mentioned him)

to answer your questions, i did not get wanderer in game bcus the devil overtook me and i pulled for childe, didn’t have enough wishes for my babygirl.

overall i prefer wanderer i think, especially for writing purposes. i reallyyyy like character development as well, so wanderer is top for me. however, i still call him scara regardless because that’s just his name in my head yk??

i also know little to nothing about kabukimono because i don’t pay attention to lore, i’m so sorry i have terrible memory (i also never do quests if i’m being honest) so i wouldn’t know HOW to write about him, so probably not just bcus it wouldn’t be accurate 🤷‍♀️ (im not up to date on scara stuff AT ALL. literally everything i write about wanderer is purely knowledge from other fics i’ve read)

[veenxys]

「Haikyuu boys as your virtual friends」

⤷ Bokuto

he’s the best friend anyone could ever have; he’s always the first to text you good morning - completely ignoring the fact that he’s sent you over twenty tiktoks or cute pictures overnight - and always says something cute like “you’re truly amazing,” “i love you so much!! have an amazing day my beautiful” with a lot of cute emojis. he always responds quickly and is always available for you; loves making calls at random times to see how you are or what you are doing, but mostly loves at night where you tell each other about everything that happened in your day and anything that comes to mind. he loves your voice and could spend all day listening to it. he also saves all the photos you send and saves it in a special folder on his phone to always look at when it misses you. he sends you gifts quite often, trying to show all of his love for you through little things you mentioned that you thought were cool or that he saw on the street and remembered you.

⤷ Kuroo

he can’t go a single day without talking to you. he is such a great listener and loves to give you advice and listen to you; he loves to know that he is now part of your life. he is also very thoughtful and playful; always asking if you’re alright, if you’re taking care of yourself. he’s also very playful and fun; always making some funny or sarcastic comment with anything just to make you smile, even just a little bit. he don’t pressure you, but he loves it when you send pictures or videos or audios. he also expects you to feel comfortable and open up to him in your own time; but always making it clear that he will never judge you or laugh at you. he is also very supportive and always supports you in all your dreams and ideas. he loves to facetime with you and talk for hours or just feel your presence while he does his own thing. he doesn’t admit it, but he’s jealous of your friends.

⤷ Atsumu

he is very affectionate and kind to you; which makes you create high relationship expectations. he always sends pictures or videos of what he’s doing, and it’s often something cute or funny or a picture of him in the mirror after a workout/after leaving the gym. he also loves to hear your voice and loves to call you - mostly facetime where he can flirt and play with you freely and smile at your cute reaction - and surprised (in a good way) when you flirt back - he makes playlists for you and reads the books you love most only to find little parts of you on the pages. he also sends you cute and unexpected gifts with a handmade letter that always makes you melt and fall in love with him even more. lots of inside jokes and pranks that no one would understand; as if the two of you created a special little world where love and joy reign.

⤷ Osamu

he always smiles embarrassed and even passionate when you send him something cute or just a picture of you; he’s completely surrendered to you and can’t show it too much at first, so he always sends you a heart emoji or something when really he wants to scream for everyone to hear how beautiful and amazing you are. he always sends you funny or cute animal videos, memes and recipes he sees on the internet and says “i’ll make this for you when we meet”. loves planning a future with you, even though you’re just friends, he can’t imagine his life without you anymore. he cares a lot about you and always knows when you are sad or angry, and he is always more than ready to listen to you and help you with whatever is needed. he loves to tell you gossip about his brother or his friends and he loves it when you tell him too; he always has to get away from his friends because he just can’t stop smiling or laughing.

⤷ Oikawa

he’s the kind of friend who loves to facetime with you, but he always puts his image as the biggest and keeps looking at him while you talk about anything. despite this, he is a great friend who is always with you, regardless of the situation. he loves teasing you and playing with you, but he also knows when to be kind and respectful. pretend not to, but smile silly and love it when you send him a picture or video, or just call him. at night, he is imagining you; what are you doing, how are you doing or what it would be like to be holding you right now. he is so attached to you that he no longer knows to see a life where you are not.

⤷ Nishinoya

he loves planning every detail of how the two of you are going to meet, how it’s going to happen, and where you’re going to see each other. he loves to imagine hugging you or just having you around, it’s one of his biggest dreams that he can’t get out of his mind. whenever you post a photo, he is the first to comment; it’s mostly just nonsense and hysterical screaming and emojis, he also loves using giant copypastes about how beautiful you are. pictures of you always have 30+ comments just of him praising you. you don’t know, but he also puts your pictures as wallpaper because looking at you always makes him happier. loves to call you and doesn’t mind if you spend all day talking, when you hang up he always gets upset because he wants to talk more and more with you, even if he doesn’t have anything else to talk about.

⤷ Kenma

he is shy at first but starts to get carried away after a while because he really likes you. he likes to send you random memes and videos that he knows you will like and he feels a slight heat build up in his chest and cheeks when you laugh or say something cute to him. he also buys you games so the two of you can play together and he loves that; the intimacy you share in the middle of the night. he likes to sleep on call with you; something like knowing you’re close to him even when you’re far away makes him feel calm and less alone. he doesn’t say, but he can’t stop thinking about you or what it would be like to finally see you in person, what it would be like to be able to hold you and have you by his side.

⤷ Suna

he’s the best friend and listener you can imagine, but he’s not used to sharing much of his life with you; he’s reserved at first, but after a while he starts to open up and tell things about his past or about his family and friends; when you listen with excitement and show him that you love to hear him, he feels a warm feeling rising in his chest and a smile growing on his lips because he realizes he can tell you everything, just as you tell him everything. he also tries to participate and find out more about your interests; read your favorite books, watch the movies or series you love so much and listen to your favorite song and artists. he loves talking about these things with you because he thinks it’s beautiful the way you talk with so much excitement and love. whenever you are alone at home, he calls you to keep you company; even if you don’t want to talk or have something important to do, he just stays on the other side of the line, letting you know he’s there, and you’re not alone.

⤷ Sakusa

you are the only person he trusts and likes to tell you things because he knows you don’t judge him and he feels extremely honored and grateful to have met you and to do the same for you as a thank you. he won’t admit it, but he always does his best to make you smile; sending random memes that he doesn’t think is funny but he knows you do, and even sending him pictures of himself because he knows you like. he also likes to send you gifts; books, letters, matching necklaces or bracelets and things he know you’ll love. when you send him a picture of you, he stops for a second and just admires you; he knows every detail of you by heart and always looks at your pictures with his eyes shining, when he locks his phone and puts it away, he realizes he’s smiling like a fool.

⤷ Hinata

if he could, he would talk to you all day. his heart warms a lot when he thinks that even far away, he has someone who understands him, who loves and respects him the way he is, and he tries to show all his gratitude for you through photos of him making heart or videos where he shows you where he is or what he is doing and saying at the end “i love you, take care” and even cute gifts he sends you - but he is anxious and often ends up telling you what the gift is - he introduces you and shows you to all his friends because he loves you very much and wants you to feel closer to him; even his mother and sister know you and love you too. he really plans to see you in person one day and can’t wait for you to see him play one day.

[raibebe]

Love Is On Air

Genre: fluff & smut Words: 8.722 Prompt: radio host Johnny x secret admirer female reader Warnings: soft dom Johnny, oral (f receiving), safe sex, dirty talk

A/N: Finally: My entry for the February event of my lovely network @neosmutcollective​. This is totally not the fic I planned on writing. In fact this was started way later after I realized I was never going to finish my original fic on time. Not that this one is on time... Special thanks to everyone who sent our lovely DJs some music recommendations @sly-merlin​, @moonctzeny​, @lenaluvs​, @lucas-wongs​, @burtonized​ and to @ncteaxhoe​ who helped me figure out this idea. I hope you enjoy this even though it’s wayyy too late.

You hurried home to your apartment after your last class of the day that was horrifically late because of whoever had fucked up your schedule this semester. Panting heavily, you busted into your room and threw your jacket and backpack somewhere onto your couch, diving straight for your laptop that was perched on your desk. Cursing the old thing, you waited for agonizing minutes until it had booted up and your browser was open. You quickly opened the familiar page of your university’s campus radio just in time to hear the familiar voice saying: “Hi I’m John-D, welcome to NCT Night Night.” After that both hosts chuckled lowly before Jaehyun spoke: “Tonight we’ll read some of the letters you wrote us over the week again and we will try our best to help you out with whatever problems you throw our way.” “Exactly. Right after we play this song that was suggested by evangelie_99 over on our Twitter, it’s Pluto Projector by Rex Orange County and she said that she loves our show. We’re glad you like it so much, darling. This one is for you,” Johnny softly said before the soft tunes of the song filled your little one-room apartment.

Sighing, you leaned back in your chair, carelessly toeing your shoes off. Listening to NCT Night Night was your escape at night from the stress that classes brought you. The two DJs that were on air every Tuesday, Thursday and Sunday were your favorites though. Not only did they have great chemistry but they both could be incredibly funny as well as soothe all your nerves with their calming voices – especially Johnny or John-D as he was called on their show. You might have developed a slightly embarrassing crush on the fratboy with a heart as sweet as his voice from what you knew about him from his radio shows and your shared classes. Since they had started their weekly segment where they would read out letters that students could send them, you had gathered the courage to send Johnny little messages about how you were crushing on him and it had quickly become a running gag on the show. Jaehyun would tease Johnny about it every week while Johnny kept insisting that his secret admirer should just talk to him. But how could you do that? Johnny was everything one could want in a boyfriend. Not only was he ridiculously tall and devastatingly handsome but he was also smart, always seemingly staying on top of his classes and he also went to the gym regularly if his thirst traps on his Instagram stories were anything to go by. When he wasn’t giving out advice in a gentle voice on their radio program, he was out partying with his frat brothers on the weekends more often than not complaining about headaches on their Sunday show. How could you just walk up to him and talk to him? Right. You couldn’t. So you had to resign to sending him anonymous love letters through his radio show.

“Welcome back, hi,” Johnny chuckled once the song had gently faded out and you couldn’t help but giggle along. “That was Pluto Projector by Rex Orange County,” Jaehyun tried to stay on script but you could almost hear the grin on his face because of Johnny’s antics, “If you want your song to play on today’s show, please suggest something over on our Twitter with the hashtag,” Jaehyun paused momentarily and let out a dramatic sigh before continuing, “hashtag JohnDplaymelikeaviolin.” Jaehyun hadn’t even read the whole hashtag out loud when Johnny was already bursting out in laughter and how could you not laugh along with his melodic laughter. “I swear to god I am never letting you choose hashtags for our show ever again,” Jaehyun groaned while Johnny sounded like he was still dying in the background. “Don’t be mean to me Jaehyunie,” he whined and even though today’s episode was not viewable, you could vividly imagine how he was pouting. While the two friends were busy bickering and talking about what they had done since their last show, you pulled up your own Twitter to send a recommendation in.

“Aaaah, I see we’re already getting plenty of suggestions. Sly-merlin suggested us Sexy Dirty Love by Demi Lovato – a great song – and added ‘I wish John-D would actually play me like a violin.” After a potent silence, Johnny broke out in laughter again. “And this is why you won’t choose any more hashtags,” Jaehyun groaned again. “Baby,” Johnny rasped into his mic and even though you weren’t wearing headphones, it sent tingles down your spine, “Just come to our frat party on Friday and I’ll see what I can do.” “Stop plugging our parties on the radio,” Jaehyun scolded the elder, the slap audible over the radio, “Also sly-merlin has to stand in line. You still have your number one admirer who has sent in a letter yet again.” “She still hasn’t come up to me,” Johnny shared, “I can only keep up my chastity for so long. I am saving myself for this girl.” You know he was joking but you were just a simple woman and even in your secluded home, you felt heat rising to your cheeks, your thumbs stopping on your keyboard where you had typed out your song recommendation. Both DJs shared a quiet laugh before Jaehyun asked: “And you really don’t know who she is?” “I really don’t man,” his friend sighed, “Like I have my suspicions because she has to be in my major if she sees me in class that often. That or she’s a stalker which I do not want to think about. But for real, hit me up. I’ll take you out for a coffee.” “Now everyone is going to come up to you and claim that they’re her.” “I’ll take that risk,” Johnny laughed, “Maybe I’ll finally meet the love of my life and settle down.” At that Jaehyun snorted loudly. “The woman that can make you settle down gets free coffee for like a month from me.” “Watch me have a wife and kids at 25 Jae, just to spite you,” his friend snorted, “But up until then, let’s play sly-merlin’s song recommendation: Sexy Dirty Love by Demi Lovato.”

While the song was playing, you finished up your own tweet and hit post before you grabbed your bag that you had carelessly thrown away before to get out your notes. You actually had to start a project for one of the classes you and Johnny actually did share. The professor had announced that he would announce the pairings for a group project tomorrow and you didn’t want to seem like an actual idiot if your group would decide to already meet up and discuss after class. So while you listened to your favorite DJs discuss the questions and worries of whoever had sent them to their email address, you worked through the notes you had taken over the last couple of weeks, trying your best to organize them to remember the key points.

“Oh John-D, I have a very special letter here,” Jaehyun said, waving the paper in front of the microphone so it would pick up the wiggling noises. “What could that be?” Johnny asked with over-exaggerated interest. “It’s from your secret admirer, John-D. So I think you should read it out.” Just like every time, they read your letter, your heart began beating faster and faster in your chest until you were sure, it would break free from your ribcage. “Okay, here I go,” Johnny announced while Jaehyun was playing the same cheesy music he always played when they were reading your letters, “Happy Thursday, John-D. The weekend is almost in reach, keep up the energy for the last day of classes! – she’s so sweet, I’m holding up alright – One of my professors will announce the pairings he made for a group project soon and I am nervous. I don’t have many friends in the course and I’m praying that I will get good group mates I can work well with.” “Oooh, I get that struggle,” Jaehyun interrupted, “I once had to work with a bunch of stoners and ended up doing all the work for a presentation that made up 30 percent of my grade. Worst experience of my life, would not recommend. But we’re wishing you all the luck.” “But you know what’s more interesting about this story?” Johnny tuned in, “Coincidentally my professor for my literature class is assigning our group projects tomorrow as well. Say, my sweet admirer, are you perhaps in the same literature class as me?” In your otherwise silent room, the panicked squeak you let out was loud even to your ears. There was no way Johnny could figure out who you were, there were probably at least 20 more girls with a crush on him in that class alone, so you were safe. “Oooh, so maybe she’s a lit major so that’s why she’s writing love letters.” “Could be but lots of people from different majors are taking that class,” Johnny argued, “Anyways, back to her letter. But I won’t let that disturb me! I will be doing my best regardless! – That’s the spirit – I’ll work through my notes as I listen to your honey voice so I can be prepared. I’m glad you don’t do viewable radios on Thursday’s or else I wouldn’t be able to get anything done, you’re just too distracting John-D,” at that Jaehyun let out a fake gag while Johnny just giggled softly, “Thank you secret admirer, I do clean up quite nicely if I do say so myself. – On last Sunday’s episode you melted my heart when you hid in your hoodie for half the show. – God that was the worst hangover I had in a looong while, I was so miserable.”

“You should have seen him at home,” Jaehyun laughed, “I had to physically drag his whole 180-something-centimeters body first into the shower, then into the car and into the station. He is the biggest crybaby when he’s hungover.” “Don’t expose me like that, Jaehyunie,” Johnny whined loudly, “I was dared to drink a bunch of tequila and my mother didn’t raise neither a quitter nor a coward.” “No, but clearly an idiot,” the younger DJ laughed his deep laugh. “Let me read my love letter in peace,” the other grumbled, “I couldn’t follow for half the show because I was so focused on watching you. Not in a creepy way of course! – Of course not,” Johnny chuckled, “I hope you finished that essay you had to work on after the show in time and still had some time to relax. – I did, don’t worry.” That you already knew when Johnny had handed in his essay in another class you two shared just before you had handed in yours and he had thrown you a little smile that had kept you going through the whole day. “Take care of yourself and keep smiling your beautiful smile, I look forward to seeing you again on Sunday or in classes. And fighting to Jae-D as well of course! – I look forward to hearing from you again, secret admirer. I bet your group project will go just fine, don’t worry too much. If anyone is mean to you, just expose them here and we’ll fight them for you.” “Love that she acknowledged me in one sentence as well,” Jaehyun grumbled, cutting off the cheesy music abruptly. “You’re just jealous you don’t have a sweet admirer who sends you cute messages,” the other teased his friend. “Yeah, yeah, shut up and put that letter in the box under your bed.” “It’s in my sock drawer, thank you very much.”

Giggling, you listened to the two friends bicker, your chest warm with a feeling you were scared to put a name on. “Anyways, I think it’s time for another music recommendation you can still send in via our lovely hashtag JohnDplaymelikeaviolin. This one is from lenaluvies and she says: Please play Hurts So Good by Astrid S thank you. No, thank you for sending something in darling. This one’s for you,” Johnny announced and you couldn’t help but laugh a little pained laugh. That song title hit a little too close to home for your liking. The rest of the radio show went by smoothly and Johnny and Jaehyun tried to help a handful of more students with their problems that couldn’t be more diverse. From a boy who had fallen in love with his best friend which had send him into an identity crisis over to a girl who was failing her classes because she claimed the professor hated her to a freshman who wanted to apply for a fraternity but was scared because of the rumors surrounding them which the DJs quickly debunked since they both were in the same fraternity. In the end they had to cut themselves short, asking their viewers to vote on a poll they would make if people wanted a whole Tuesday episode surrounding fraternities.

“So.” “So,” Johnny copied his friend. “We’re almost at the end of our time with you guys. We couldn’t get through all of your submissions but we hope our team picked a few good ones and at least some of you could get some advice.” “As always you’re free to send us your own stories to our e-mail JohnJaeNNN@NCTU.com to get some advice next Thursday from your favorite DJs: John-D.” “And Jae-D. Every Tuesday, Thursday and Sunday on your campus radio on 127mHz. On NCT-“ “Night Night,” they said their ending together and just like every night with them, you said goodnight to your computer screen, closing the tab which draped your little apartment in silence. Sighing loudly, you looked over your notes that needed a little more work if you wanted to make a good first impression on your fellow students tomorrow. Because you couldn’t stand the silence, you opened your Spotify to play the NCT Night Night playlist Johnny and Jaehyun had made with the songs that had been recommended to them, still missing the new additions from tonight.

The next morning found you in your literature class, sitting two rows behind Johnny, staring at the back of his head while doodling on your paper rather than taking notes on whatever the professor was saying. If you were to let your eyes wander, you’d see that almost everyone in the big room was paying as much or even less attention as you were; the students in different states of excitement and anxiety over the group projects he had yet to announce. “I’m sorry professor,” Johnny’s voice suddenly cut through the room, “I’m sure you have already noticed that no one is paying attention to whatever you’re trying to teach us right now. Could you please just announce the groups for the project?” That moment you swore you would be able to hear a pin drop until your eccentric professor chuckled lowly. “I like you, Suh. I was waiting for someone to mention it,” he spoke, getting the dreaded list out of his bag, “Listen closely now, you’ll be assigned in groups of four and each group will get a specific novel to work on. Deadline will be by the end of the semester and your individual paper combined with the group presentation will make up 40% of your final grade.” That made a bunch of people, including you, gasp out loudly. A group project with this much credit to your final grade was always dreaded. “I don’t want to hear any complaints, that’s how it’s always been. Now listen carefully, I won’t repeat myself but the list will be hung on our blackboard as well.” With that being said, the professor began listing names and novels in the most monotone voice he could muster. To say you were basically vibrating off of your seat was an understatement when he got further and further down the list and neither yours nor Johnny’s name had been called yet. “And lastly, an all-time favorite: Romeo and Juliet.” You didn’t even register anything else after the professor had announced that the group featured both Johnny and you along with two other students you didn’t know. Your brain was reduced to static noise while everyone else was getting up around you to pick up the books that had already been stacked in a corner, probably by a poor TA. Only when a person bumped into you, you broke from your stupor to quickly pick up your stuff as well to hurry down to steps to where a crowd of students had already gathered.

Luckily Johnny towered over most of the other students and you could easily spot him and the rest of your group that were two other boys you didn’t recognize. “Hey, you’re the last one we were missing,” Johnny smiled and handed you over your copy of the book. “Y... Yeah, sorry for making you wait,” you stuttered, clutching the small book tightly in your hands. “No big deal,” Johnny played it off, “Do any of you have any more classes today?” When everyone declined, you all agreed that you should get a head start on your project as it would be hard to make a good project out of such an overused love story. While walking over to the student center to decide on a concept, conversation flowed easily between the four of you even though you were still really nervous to be around Johnny. God, you really hoped he didn’t think you were stupid or something just because you were nervous.

The little study session went by in a blur and only further confirmed that you were so whipped for Johnny it wasn’t even funny anymore. You found yourself attentively listening to all of his ideas and laughing at every of his stupid little jokes and only mildly spacing out while looking at Johnny when the others were discussing ideas which had led to one or two mildly embarrassing situations where you would lose track of what you were actually discussing, your mind blank of any input when they asked for your opinion.

Soon you found yourself parting ways with your groupmates, leaving you and Johnny alone because his frat house and your little apartment were located in the same general direction. “Anything fun you’re doing this evening?” Johnny asked, trying to make some light conversation to fill the silence. “No, I’ll just binge watch some shows maybe or listen to the campus radio,” you shrugged it off. While today’s show wasn’t your favorite, you quite liked the DJs soft and gentle voice. “You listen to the campus radio? I have a show on there,” Johnny smiled. “I like listening to you and Jaehyun,” you confessed, trying to fight the heat that was licking at your cheeks. “Oh.” “You seem surprised.” “Yeah, it kind of still seems weird that people enjoy listening to Jae and me rambling for hours on end. You know with him it just feels like I’m hanging out with my brother rather than work.” “Your voices are really soothing, you know,” you tried to explain what you were feeling when listing to them, “And your friendship is kind of adorable. Like we can feel how much you care about each other and you always genuinely try to help your listeners without making fun of them.” For a while Johnny didn’t say anything and you thought you had fucked it up, that he thought you were weird now. “Thank you,” he suddenly said. “Huh?” “It means a lot hearing that. We do lurk on Twitter to see what people think of our show but hearing it like this is something else entirely.” “It’s nothing,” you mused, playfully hitting his arm, “No need to get this soft.” “Hey,” he laughed, “I’ll have you know that I am 180 centimeters of walking softness despite what people might say about me.” Smiling softly you caught his eyes for the first time since you two had started walking and the way his honey eyes were smiling back at you momentarily took your breath away.

“I- My room is right around here, sooooo,” you stuttered. “It was nice working with you. Even though you were spacing out half the time,” Johnny teased, “Thinking about a special someone?” You. The word sat on the tip of your tongue, the low light of the afternoon sun making you bolder than you actually were and Johnny just made you feel incredibly comfortable. “No... No- I- I’m single.” “A crush then?” “Something like that,” you mumbled, your fingers nervously playing with the hem of your jacket. “Talk to him. Or her. Or them,” Johnny advised. “I really can’t,” you sighed, “He doesn’t even know I exist.” “Well you don’t need to confess your undying love for him,” he laughed, not knowing he was the boy in question, “Just you know. Casually talk to him. Get to know him.” “I’ll try?” “Is that a question?” “Yeah?” “Have more confidence in yourself,” he gently nudged you, “You’re nice and very easy to talk to.” “Nice... Wow.” “Shut up,” he laughed, “I usually give better compliments but I have yet to get to know you better.” “Would you... Would you even want that?” “Sure,” Johnny shrugged and your heart skipped a couple of beats, “I have to get going or everybody will already be drunk when I arrive. So... I’ll see you in class? And you’ll hear me on Sunday?” “Yeah sure. Don’t drink too much or you will be miserable all show like last week,” you giggled. “Don’t remind me,” he groaned, “I’m never going to drink tequila on a Saturday ever again.” “Goodbye Johnny,” you smiled, really liking how his name sounded when you said it out loud. “Bye,” he waved before going his way.

Once you were sure he was out of hearing distance, you let out a little happy squeak and jumped up and down excitedly. You did it. You had actually done it. You had talked to your crush. And managed to not make a complete fool out of yourself in front of him. Which was a win in your books. A huge win. With a little spring in your steps, you stepped by one of your favorite pizza places to treat yourself before heading home where you spend your evening daydreaming about none other than Johnny while watching reruns of old dramas.

“Hi, I’m Jae-D.” “And I am John-D. Welcome to NCT-“ “Night Night.” “John-D.” “Yes, Jae-D,” Johnny chuckled. “It’s Thursday again which means it’s time to tend to our listener’s worries,” Jaehyun read off of the script, not getting distracted by his friend’s antics, “And today is a very special episode.” “Special?” Jaehyun barely repressed to roll his eyes at his friend’s over-exaggerated acting before continuing: “Yes, since tomorrow is a day off for all students, we have decided to make this episode extra lengthy and-“ he shortly stopped to flash the camera a peace sign, “Viewable despite it being Thursday.” “Do we look okay?” Johnny laughed, checking himself out in the video that was playing on one of their monitors. “Aaaaah, the comments say we look good tonight, thank you,” Jaehyun mused.

And they really did. Not that either of them had to do a whole lot to look good but today they were both wearing white button-downs with their sleeves rolled up to expose their forearms. Jaehyun had even gone so far as to put on some fake glasses. “And if you’re following us on our Twitter you also already know that this week it’s all about love on our campus radio and our show today is no exception,” Johnny read his part of the script. “Today John-D and Jae-D are Loveholics, trying our very best to help you with your problems surrounding love,” Jaehyun completed, “You can send in song recommendations through the hashtag JohnJaeLoveholic just like taryn1026 did – I hope I said that right – but they recommended Paris in the Rain by Lauv to set the mood for today.”

The soft tunes of the song made you relax a little into your sofa where you had chosen to watch today’s episode of NCT Night Night. You had to say that you were kind of nervous for today’s episode. Just like every week you had written your letter to Johnny, telling him about your week and cheering him on for your group project. At this point it should have been pretty obvious just who exactly you were and judging by how Johnny was acting towards you, his flirting leaving you flustered after your study sessions and your group mates mildly annoyed, he seemed to already have put together the pieces. But yesterday while writing your letter you had felt extra bold (and maybe also extra riled up and horny from Johnny’s shameless flirting) and had written him a message that should confirm all his suspicions and would hopefully lead him straight to you and into your bed. But until the end of the show or at least until they read your letter, which you really hoped they did today as well, you had to wait sitting in your apartment, for once not in comfortable clothes but in a nice shirt and pants.

“That was Paris in the Rain by Lauv, recommended to us by taryn1026 through our Twitter with the hashtag JohnJaeLoveholic,” Johnny’s raspy voice filled your apartment when he leaned close to the mic, “Jae-D are you ready to make some love happen?” “I already had my love juice,” Jaehyun answered, showing his pink Starbucks drink to the camera, “And my reading glasses are on.” As to prove his point, he hiked his glasses up his nose before scratching his eye through the holes in the frame, making both DJs chuckle. For the next hour Johnny and Jaehyun tried to solve several relationship dramas as well as a very tricky friends-with-benefits situation and telling a boy to break up with his cheating girlfriend which had been a rather heartbreaking discussion. “So after this,” Jaehyun sighed, “Let’s play another song recommendation. Burtonized has sent in a very fitting song, I hope you all don’t mind a little Korean: It’s God Damn by I.M – a song about heartbreak.”

While the foreign song was playing, the two DJs stretched their backs and sipped on their respective drinks: Jaehyun still on his pink sugar concoction and Johnny already on his second iced Americano. Jaehyun must have found something funny on his phone, nudging his friend to look at him but Johnny was busy typing away on his own, only acknowledging his friend after he had typed his message. Just after that, your own phone buzzed with a message, showing Johnny’s name on the screen.

From: Johnny Are you watching our show?

To: Johnny Sure, you look good today

From: Johnny Make sure to listen closely ;)

“That was God Damn by I.M suggested by burtonized over our Twitter hashtag JohnJaeLoveholic,” Jaehyun’s smooth voice tore you from your spiraling thoughts about the winking face Johnny had sent. “Sadly our show is coming to an end even with our extended airtime.” “But John-D a very important letter is still missing before we close our show. Dare I say it could be the highlight of our show,” Jaehyun joked, already playing the cheesy music he was always playing when Johnny would read your letters. “You’re right Jae-D my lovely secret admirer has sent in another letter,” Johnny mused, arranging himself so he could read the printed out letter while being as close as possible to the mic for it to pick up the rasp in his voice, “Happy Thursday John-D, I hope your week has been more exciting than mine. I have just been going from class to class without much thought, the only high points are my group meetings for the group project we have to hand in soon – That seems very familiar, baby – But since today is all about love, I’ll tell you about a little problem I have: – get your love juice ready, Jae – There is this boy in my group. And boy isn’t really the right word to describe him, he’s a man really,” at that Johnny couldn’t hold back a low chuckle, “I’m sorry, I’ll be serious – And he is flirting with me. Has been for a couple of weeks now. And it has gotten to the point where our groupmates are kind of annoyed at us. He has also walked me home a couple of times but he never so much as touched me. At this point I am so frustrated with him. Is he just playing with me? Or is his mouth bigger than his actions actually are? He has been riling me up all day today and I was ready to let him have his way with me but he only wished me goodnight and left again, leaving me to deal with what he had done all by myself – oh wow, I,” Johnny stuttered, sharing a gaze with his friend who was only barely repressing his laughter, “Wow, okay, I hope we’re in the good for reading this out and it’s late enough,” clearing his voice and raking a hand through his hair, Johnny continued, “John-D I hope this man hears what he has done to me and will deal with the consequences of his actions. Would you play Animal by Jin Yosef and RIELL for me? Just in case this letter hasn’t gotten my point across? – Y... Yeah sure, darling. We’ll play that once our show is over.”

“So John-D,” Jaehyun grinned while loudly slurping on his ‘love juice’, “What would you advice your secret admirer to do about this problem?” “Well if I were her,” Johnny started, his gaze going straight to the camera where he knew you were watching and it felt like he was looking straight into your soul, “I’d wait for him. I’m pretty sure he can prove that his actions speak even louder than his words.” For a while it was quiet between the two DJs, safe for Jaehyun’s obnoxiously loud slurping noises but even if they would have been saying anything, you weren’t sure if you could have comprehended any words with how furiously your heart was beating. “Anyways,” Jaehyun eventually broke the silence once he was sure there was nothing left in his ‘love juice’, “I’m afraid that was it for tonight. This has been your extra lengthy episode of Jae-D and John-D and we will leave you with this wonderful song recommendation: Animal by Jin Yosef and RIELL. If you’ve liked today’s show, we’re here every Tuesday, Thursday and Sunday night on your campus radio on 127mHz to listen to all of your worries on NCT-“ “Night Night,” Johnny joined in and they both waved into the camera as your song of choice started playing. The video stream didn’t cut off immediately, showing the boys gathering their things and if your eyes weren’t betraying you, you swore you saw Johnny tense up when the song turned a little more explicit. The two DJs waved to the camera one last time before the stream cut off, leaving the screen of your laptop dark.

That was when it dawned on you what you had done. Shit. With how Johnny had sounded, you probably had about fifteen to twenty minutes until he would be at your doorstep. Oh god. Shit. Taking a couple of deep breaths, you tried to ground yourself before hurriedly closing your laptop and cleaning everything that seemed messy in your little one-room apartment. That was until you heard a knock on your door.

With shaky hands, you slowly opened the door and while you knew who would be standing on the other side, you weren’t ready for how he was going to look like: Johnny was leaning against the doorway casually with his arms crossed over his chest so the tight button-down he was wearing would strain over the planes of his chest muscles but what really reeled you in was how dark his eyes looked when he raked them over your body. “Good evening miss,” he drawled. “Hi,” you breathed. “Tell me what you want so I’m not misinterpreting any of this,” Johnny all but growled, one of his hands coming up to cup your face. “I want you to have me.” If you thought his eyes were dark before, they turned into bottomless black orbs once the words had left your lips. “You don’t know what you’re asking for, baby.” “Please,” you whimpered and that seemed to break Johnny’s resolve as he pulled you close to him and all but crashed his lips into yours. The kiss wasn’t delicate in any way, shape or form with how Johnny was licking into your mouth the second a moan left your lips. His tongue was intertwining with yours messily and in no time both of you were panting into each other’s mouths. “Inside. Now,” you rasped. “All with due time,” Johnny chuckled but let you pull him into your apartment, slamming the door shut to crowd you against it, one of his strong thighs slipping between your legs like it belonged there, “If you’re a good girl and listen well, I’ll give you anything you want.” “Fuck,” you cursed before slamming your lips together again, a new neediness bleeding into the kiss as you tugged on the longer strands of hair at the back of Johnny’s neck which made him growl lowly. “Anything off-limits?” Johnny breathed into your skin as he kissed down your neck to suck a mark there while his hands were busy pulling your shirt from your pants so he could rake them over your naked skin. “Just,” you had to cut yourself off with a moan, “Don’t be mean to me.” “Never,” he promised, “You’ll be my pillow princess.” His sweet words were in stark contrast to how hard his hands were gripping your hips and how his teeth were grazing over your neck that must be littered with marks already. “Take me to bed,” you heaved breathlessly, positive your legs would give out if it wasn’t for Johnny holding you up.

Listening to your demand, he slowly started walking you backwards towards your bed until the two of you were toppling down on top of the covers, his lips never leaving your skin. Whoever had spread the rumors about Johnny being a great lover had been absolutely right, he knew just how to touch you to have you gasping for air and judging by the grin on his lips he hadn’t even started yet. “Please,” you whimpered, arching into his touch, not exactly sure what exactly you were asking for but Johnny seemed to know all the better when he freed you from your top and pants to leave you in your matching lace set while he was still fully clothed in his by now wrinkled button-up and pants. “All for me?” He chuckled and pressed a kiss right between the valley of your breasts, his big hands cupping the soft flesh to squeeze it gently. “Have me,” you gasped out and you could feel the growl he let out vibrating where you were pressed together. “I’m going to ruin you,” Johnny promised, pulling down the cups of your bra to wrap his plush lips around one of your nipples to tease the soft nub until it hardened under his ministrations, sending waves of pleasure down your spine and straight to your core where you could feel your wetness starting to seep into the fabric of your panties. “Johnny,” you mewled and arched into his every touch, his calloused fingertips setting your skin alight when he let them travel down your body to tease over your lower stomach. As if by reflex, you let your thighs fall open for him to finally touch you where you needed him the most. “Such a good girl,” he smiled, blowing cold air over your spit-slicked nipple to watch you squirm beneath him. Your remark got stuck in your throat when he finally cupped you through your panties, feeling how damp the fabric had already become. “Naughty,” he chuckled, his eyes never leaving your face as he circled your clit through the fabric, watching your eyes fluttering shut when his gaze became too intense.

“Johnny,” you sighed, forgetting all other words except for his name. “Relax, princess,” he rasped and kissed his way down your body, leaving love bites on the sensitive skin of your stomach and thighs that shook with anticipation. If you’d say you hadn’t dreamed about his lips on you like this, you would lie and you weren’t going to miss the sight of this for nothing. Fighting back the fog that had started to cloud your mind, you forced your eyes open to look down to where he had settled between your open thighs to find him staring right back at you. “Good girl,” he praised you again before pressing a kiss over your clothed sex that made your head fall back already, the anticipation of what was to come making you push up your hips which made Johnny chuckle lowly. He didn’t leave you any time to feel embarrassed by how needy you were when he hooked your panties to the side unceremoniously and licked a broad stripe up your center, tasting your arousal. “Oh fuck,” you breathed out, your hands flying down to tangle them in the long strands of his hair. Johnny worked his tongue in slow and clever strokes, leaving your mind reeling with pleasure and taking his time to take you apart piece by piece, not even paying attention to your leaking center or your aching clit. But when he did wrap his lips around your clit to gently suck on the nub, your mind almost went numb with how intense his touch was, your thighs clamping shut around him. To make it even worse, he started humming around you while prying your thighs back open, holding you down with his large hands. You felt your orgasm approach almost embarrassingly fast now that he was altering between teasing your clit with his tongue, lips and even his teeth and fucking your velvety walls with his tongue, setting your nerve endings on fire. “Johnny I’m close,” you warned him but instead of slowing down, he stretched his jaw wide to press his tongue further into you, his nose bumping into your clit in the process and with the combined sensation and his doubled effort, it took no time for your first orgasm of the night to wash over you, a scream of his name leaving your lips as you shook through it, your mind going equally as numb as your legs.

When you came back to it, Johnny had straightened up between your legs and he was grinning down at you while he was unbuttoning his shirt, his face still shiny with your arousal. “That was the first one,” he spoke darkly. “Come here,” you whined, making grabby hands for him until he took pity on you and covered your body with his before connecting your lips in a bruising kiss. You could still taste yourself on his lips but that somehow just made it even hotter.

“Want you inside me,” you panted against his lips when Johnny broke the kiss in favor of raking his teeth over your racing pulse. “Yeah?” He rasped and ground his hips down into yours, making you feel him strain against the fabric of his pants. “Need it,” you moaned at the sweet friction. “Think you can take me?” He laughed as he leaned back on his hunches to pop open the button of his pants, pulling down the zipper agonizingly slow. With wide eyes you watched him push his pants down his narrow hips, leaving him in just his navy boxers that showed the sizable imprint of his hard cock, the fabric against the head dark from where he had leaked precum. Chuckling, he stroked over the outline and just the sight alone made your mouth water. “Show me,” you breathed, spreading your thighs so he could see your needy core, clenching around nothing. “Hmm,” he hummed, dragging one of his fingers that wasn’t preoccupied with teasing himself through the mess of arousal and his saliva between your legs, only barely dipping it into you to feel the muscles trying to suck him inside. “Don’t tease me,” you whined high in your throat. “But I like seeing you squirm,” Johnny grinned but took mercy on you and sunk his finger into you up to the knuckle, gently pumping it inside you. Still sensitive from how intense your last orgasm had been, you were torn between pulling away and wanting more but Johnny made the decision for you when he pulled his finger out, wiping your arousal onto your thigh.

“Eyes on me,” he commanded and finally freed his cock from his briefs. “Fuck.” The curse left your lips without even noticing at the sight of his flushed cock, too heavy to properly stand up against his toned abs. The tip was tinted red and shiny with precum that Johnny generously spread down that whole length, his eyes not leaving yours as you watched him lazily jerk himself. “Like what you see?” You eagerly nodded your head. “Want it inside me.” “Yeah? Show me.”

Throwing all caution out of the window, you quickly sucked two of your fingers between your lips before guiding them to your weeping core to slip them inside you, letting out an over-exaggerated moan as you crooked them. “Oh you’re so naughty, baby,” Johnny groaned, squeezing the base of his cock tightly as he watched you fingering yourself and if you had even one coherent thought left in your head, you’d have the decency to be embarrassed because of how intensely he was staring. “It’s not enough,” you pouted, pulling your fingers free and spreading them to look at the slick covering them, “I’m so wet for you.” “Such a dirty mouth,” he groaned, quickly grabbing his pants to fish a condom from his wallet to roll over his hard length. “Please, Johnny,” you hiccupped, winding your legs around his waist to pull him closer to you. “Sssh, princess,” he soothed you, running his hands over your torso before bending down to press tender kisses to your stomach, “I’ll take care of you.” “Please kiss me.”

Dropping his elbows next to your head to support his weight, he covered your body with his and caught your lips in a kiss much too tender for your current situation, taking his time to explore your mouth until you were perfectly pliant beneath him. “Tell me if it hurts,” he whispered into the small space between you while he snaked a hand between your bodies to guide his cock to your core. When the head slipped in without much resistance, both of you let out twin moans of pleasure. Painstakingly slowly Johnny pushed inside you, centimeter by centimeter until his hips were flush to yours. “Breathe, princess,” he reminded you because you indeed had held your breath and had buried your nails in his biceps. “Shit, you’re big,” you cursed. “So I’ve been told,” Johnny chuckled and peppered your face and neck with little kisses while he slowly ground his hips so you could get used to him inside you.

“Move,” you demanded after a while.   “What’s the magic word baby?” He grinned. “Please, Johnny,” you whimpered, clenching down on him. “Once more.” “Don’t make me beg.” “But you sound so pretty when you do,” he chuckled, only barely moving his hips. “Johnny please,” you whined, trying your best to move on his cock on your own but the angle was just not working out. “Oh, you want to do the work?” “I want you to move,” you groaned, pawing at his chest.

“But I think you’d look so pretty riding my cock,” Johnny rasped and in one fluid movement, he had sat up and pulled you onto his lap. Shit, it felt like he was even deeper now. “Come on, princess.” Whining, you wound your arms around his shoulders and pulled your legs beneath you so you could lift your hips up to make his cock smoothly slide out, the friction just right before you slowly dropped back down again, earning you an appreciative groan from Johnny. “That’s right, baby,” he praised you as you slowly found a comfortable pace, swiveling your hips until the angle was just right. Tightening the grip you had on his shoulders to use it as leverage, you began riding him in earnest, impaling yourself on his cock over and over again until your head was spinning and your thighs started to burn. “Come on, doll,” Johnny grinned, catching one of your nipples between his lips. Whining, you rolled your hips faster until your thighs began shaking. “Need help?” He just grinned, his big hands holding onto your hips to help you move up and down his cock at a steadier pace. “Please Johnny,” you hiccupped, hiding your face in his neck to ground yourself, “Please fuck me.” “Am I not doing just that?” He chuckled, filthily grinding his cock inside you. “Do it right,” you panted into his skin, “Fuck me like you mean it.”

“Then get on your hands and knees for me, baby.” He didn’t have to tell you twice, it was almost comical how quickly you obeyed his command and arched your back for him. “Hmm, that’s it,” he praised you, tracing the curve of your spine with his hands until he reached the space between your shoulder blades where he gently pushed down to make you arch even further. “So good and pliant for me, just waiting to be filled.” “Please,” you just whined again, past the point of caring about how pathetic you sounded, begging for his cock. “Say it baby,” he demanded, slapping his cock against your wet folds. “Please fuck me Johnny. Please. I want your cock inside me so badly. Want you to fuck me until I can’t even remember my own name anymore. Please I need it. I-“ your frantic rambling got cut off by the surprised moan leaving your lips as he thrust into you without any warning. “Don’t hold back baby,” Johnny rasped before gripping your hips tightly to finally fuck you in earnest, the sound of skin slapping together loud in the otherwise silent room. “God, your ass looks amazing,” he moaned, burying himself in your tight heat over and over again, mesmerized by how his cock was glistening in the low light and how easily your body opened up for him, “You’re basically made to take my cock.” You could only mewl at his dirty words and fist the sheets tightly in your hands as you tried to meet his thrusts as best as you could while you felt like you got your soul fucked right out of you.

“Feels so good,” you slurred when you felt the familiar knot in your stomach ready to snap, clenching around Johnny’s cock. “God baby, if you keep clenching like that I’m gonna cum,” Johnny cursed, grabbing you by the neck to pull you up against his chest, the pace of his hips only getting faster. “Please Johnny. Want it inside,” you whined, letting him use your body how he wanted to relish in the low moans he let out. “You want me to fill you up baby?” “Want it so bad, Johnny,” you mewled. “Then cum for me. Cum on my cock and I’ll give you anything you want.” And oh god. You had never thought that the strained sound of a couple of words could be enough to actually trip you over the edge but the rasp in Johnny’s voice had you falling apart in his arms, your orgasm ripping through you so hard it had your thighs shaking. “Such a good girl,” Johnny praised you before he let out a low guttural moan and fucked into you once – then twice – before his hips came to a halt, emptying his cum inside the condom.

For a while you two just panted loudly before Johnny gently laid you back down onto the mattress, chuckling lowly when you whined at the loss of his cock. “Shit,” you giggled while he quickly got rid of the condom, throwing it in the general direction of your trashcan. So tender you could have missed it, Johnny pressed a row of kisses down your spine until he reached the swell of your ass. “Cuddle me,” you pouted, making grabby hands at him. “We’re sweaty, princess,” he laughed but gave in when you kept pouting. “I don’t care,” you whined, fitting your head beneath his, wrapping your arms and legs around his body to cling to him like a koala. “You’re cute,” he smiled, pressing his lips to your forehead.

“For how long did you know?” “Know what?” Johnny asked, clearly confused. “That I was your secret admirer.” “I didn’t.” “It was so obvious,” you groaned. “Okay maybe I got a hunch after we started that group project. But you never said anything.” “What was I supposed to say? Oh Johnny, by the way, I’m the one who has been writing you cringey love letters for like half a year already. Please go out with me?” That made Johnny laugh, the sound melodic in the quiet of your room. “I would have said yes, you know?” He spoke lowly, “I’ll miss your letters.” “What makes you think I will stop writing them?” “Because you can tell me all that stuff in person now when we go on dates.” “We’ll go on dates?” “That’s what people do when they like each other, princess,” Johnny chuckled, “And I really like you. Both as my secret admirer and my classmate.” “Oh my god stop,” you whined, hiding your hot face in his chest, feeling shy all of a sudden while Johnny was just laughing.

“I like you too,” you eventually mumbled once it had gotten quiet again. “I figured,” he teased you. “I changed my mind,” you immediately shot back, rising from where you were cuddled into his chest but every other protest died on your tongue when you saw his dreamy expression, his honey eyes finding yours and completely ignoring the fact that you were still very much naked. “Date me,” he said. “Okay,” you answered, easily meeting his lips in a sweet kiss that wouldn’t be the last one you two shared tonight.

“Hello and welcome back, that was Middle Of The Night by Monsta X, suggested to us by raibebe through our Twitter with the hashtag JonJaeLoveTalk. We’re your DJ’s John-D.” “And Jae-D on NCT Night Night. Hello again to all of our listeners. John-D.” “Yes Jae-D,” Johnny chuckled, leaning back in his chair. “Something is off today. I looked through our mail and there was no letter from your secret admirer.” “Oh really,” he feigned surprise. “Either they didn’t send anything in or our director got sick of the pining.” “I can calm you right back down Jae-D,” Johnny smiled, “Because she simply doesn’t need to send any more letters. I finally found her.” “No way. For real? And you didn’t tell me? I have to find out through our radio show? Friendship is dead,” Jaehyun sighed dramatically and you couldn’t help but chuckle. “Jae-D you know you’ll always be the number one in my heart, you know that.” At that Jaehyun let out fake gagging noises that made both friends chuckle.

“No but for real. I finally found her and asked her out. It’s going great so yeah,” Johnny shrugged, “In case you’re listening baby: I’m dropping by later and bring sushi.” “This is so domestic already,” Jaehyun sighed dramatically, “Where is my secret admirer?” “Maybe you could find love as well if you stopped acting like the textbook example of a frat boy.” “What is that even supposed to mean?”

Smiling, you leaned back on your sofa and listened to your boyfriend bickering with his best friend. Boyfriend. That sounded good even though it still felt unreal. Love Letters weren’t dead after all it seemed.

[natsu-tte-noodle]

A3! Translation: The Mixer ☆ Returns (Hidden Four Strings)

Viola squad viola squad (this story has nothing to do with the viola) viola squad

I TL’d this one a while ago so I don’t remember exactly how doing it felt, but I know it’s so full of slang that I probably was dying a little the entire time lolol. Regardless, I think it came out pretty nicely

Thank you to @reddoransu​ for helping me get this story, you’re a star

And, for exciting news!!  I can upload my TL’s to yaycupcake now!!  @moonlight404-translates​ was kind enough to walk me through the process. Thank you for helping me figure it out, Moonieちゃん!!  This one is up already :)

When I’m cross posting right away, I won’t bother splitting the TL into multiple posts.  I’ve also got a lot of stories already TL’d just waiting around, so you’ll hopefully see a lot from me in the near future!  A lot of them are hopefully really funny :D

The translation is under the cut. If you see anything that doesn’t seem right, please let me know!

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The Mixer ☆ Returns

Part 1

Kazunari: Tsuzuroon!  Hey, hey, you’re playing a guy who’s like a total player in the next play, right!?

Tsuzuru: No, he’s not really a “player”ー

Kazunari: No waaay, to think my time has come again~!

Tsuzuru: Huh?

Kazunari: Well like, because I heard that Tsuzuroon was gonna be playing a player!  I set up a mixer to help with your role study!  

Tsuzuru: HUH!?  You WHAT!?

Kazunari: Tsumutsumu asked me for help with his role study when he played a playboy in the Winter Troupe’s second show, so the three of us went to a mixer, didn’t we?

Kazunari: So I like, thought you might come to me for help the same way Tsumutsumu did~!

Tsuzuru: Hold on, you can’t just…

Kazunari: After all, your role’s like someone who’s not really interested in anything but messing around, right?

Tsuzuru: Roughly speaking, yeah, but it's the “skipping practice to go play games at an arcade” kind of messing around.

Kazunari: Eh!?  Seriously?  …did I get the wrong idea?

Tsuzuru: *sigh*

Kazunari: Crap~.  Sorry~.

Kazunari: But that puts me in a bind.  Cause I kinda already set it up… (peek)

Tsuzuru: Please stop sneaking glances directly at me.

Tsuzuru: (But even if Miyoshi-san misunderstood, he DID kindly set this up for me…)

Tsuzuru: …I get it… just this once.

Kazunari: Woohoo!  The mixer returns!

Kazunari: By the way, I made it 3 and 3 like how it was when we went with Tsumutsumu before.

Tsuzuru: What are you going to do about the last person?

Kazunari: Right~ I’ll invite Tsumutsumu again~?

Tsumugi: Misumi-kun, thanks for helping me with the gardening.

Misumi: You’re welcome~ I had fun too~!

Kazunari: Ohh~!  Tsumutsumu and Sumi!  Hyper nice timing!

Kazunari: Hey, hey, Tsumutsumu, there’s another mixer, wanna go together?

Tsumugi: Eh?  A mixer?

Kazunari: Yeah!  By the way, the schedule is~…

Tsumugi: Ah, I’m sorry… I have a tutoring job on that day…

Kazunari: Ah, oh, really?

Tsuzuru: You’re kidding…

Tsumugi: Kazu-kun, Tsuzuru-kun, are you participating this time too?

Tsuzuru: That’s right.  Apparently Miyoshi-san set it up to help with my role study.

Tsuzuru: But if Tsukioka-san can’t come, what now?

Kazunari: Then~ Sumi!  How about it?

Misumi: Me~?  No problem!

Kazunari: Yaaay!

Tsuzuru: …I hope the other people can keep up with Ikaruga-san’s energy…

Tsumugi: H-Hang in there, Tsuzuru-kun.

Tsuzuru: Tsukioka-san, why are you only completely booked when I need you…?

Kazunari: I’m super excited~!  Let’s get hyped together!

Misumi: Yaaay, tri-tri-triangle~!

ー

Tsuzuru: *Sigh*...

Izumi: Tsuzuru-kun?  You’re sighing; what’s wrong?

Tsuzuru: It’s… apparently Miyoshi-san misunderstood my role this time around as a player character.

Tsuzuru: So now we’re going to a mixer together to help with role study for that…

Izumi: Huh, a mixer?

Itaru: Ahh, so that’s why he suddenly got so excited while we were talking, Kazunari.

Tsuzuru: Huh?

Itaru: Oh, Kazunari asked me about the Spring Troupe’s play the other day.  I said that Tsuzuru’s role is someone who messes around and seems to not have too much motivation.

Izumi: I see… so Kazunari-kun misunderstood that.

Tsuzuru: It’s YOUR fault!?

Itaru: Haha, sorry, sorry.

〜

CHOOSE

1. Tsuzuru-kun, you seem like you’d be popular at a mixer.

Izumi: But Tsuzuru-kun, you seem like you’d be popular at a mixer.

Tsuzuru: Eh?

Izumi: You’re calm and kind, you’re good at taking care of people since you’re an older brother, you’ve got plenty of knowledge and experience from working all sorts of part-time jobs…

Izumi: And chatting with you is always really fun, Tsuzuru-kun.

Tsuzuru: Oh, um… th-thank you very much.

Izumi: ?

2. It could become material for a script

Izumi: B-But hey!  It could become material for a later script, so…!

Tsuzuru: That, well… I guess it could.

Izumi: Yeah, since Tsuzuru-kun, you’ve said that your various jobs have been references too.  This is part of that too.

Tsuzuru: You’re right.  I’ll keep your words in mind and power through this mixer.

〜

Itaru: Who else is going to the mixer?

Tsuzuru: It looks like Tsukioka-san couldn’t come this time, so it was decided that Ikaruga-san would be going with us.

Izumi: Misumi-kun… I feel a little nervous…

Itaru: The trickster feeling is strong there.

Izumi: (Even if I say I’m worried, those three are adults, so I wonder if it’ll be alright…)

ー

Part 2

Girl A: Welco~me!  I’m Kazucchi’s college friend~!

Girl B: Are you two members of Kazuchii’s theater company!?

Kazunari: Yuppers!  This is Tsuzuroon and Sumi!

Girl C: Lit!  Actors are so cool~!  What sort of plays do you put on~?

Misumi: We put on triangular plays~!  Tri-tri-triangle~!

Girl B: Ahahaha, you’re so funny!  How cute~ triangle~!

Tsuzuru: (Like I thought, they’re all at Miyoshi-san levels of enthusiasm…)

Kazunari: Hold on, hold on~!  Tsuzuroon, aren’t you looking a little down?  Liven up more~!

Girl A: Let’s turn it up!

Tsuzuru: T-Turn it up?

Girl C: Then to get Tsuzuroon’s vibes up, should we play a game or something?

Kazunari: Ooh yeah!  Ah, I know!  Y’all know the Mozzarella Cheese Game?

Girl B: Of course!

Misumi: I don’t know it~ what kinda game is it~?

Tsuzuru: I don’t know it either.

Kazunari: It’s super simple!  You just say “mozzarella cheese” around the circle!

Kazunari: But, the rule is you gotta say it with higher energy than the person before you!

GIrl A: It’s so fun, you’ll get it if you give it a try!  Let’s do it, let's do it~!

Kazunari: Ok then, we’ll start with Sumi!  Tsuzuroon will go last~.

Tsuzuru: I’m last!?

Misumi: Here I go, then~ Mozzarella triangle~!

Tsuzuru: Wh-, the word changed right from the start!

Girl C: Ahahaha, that’s great, you’re so funny Sumi~!  Then I’ll go neeext!

ー

Girl B: Mozzare~lla~!!  Tria~ngleee~!!!

Everyone: Ahahahahaha!!

Kazunari: So funny!!  It’s too hype!

Misumi: Ahaha, tria~ngleee~!

Girl C: Alright, last up is Tsuzuroon!  The floor’s yours~!

Tsuzuru: Th-The last one in this, huh…

Kazunari: You’ll be fiiiiine!  Give it a go!

Tsuzuru: …*deep breath*...

Tsuzuru: MOZZARE~LLAAAA~~!  TRI-AN-G–*COUGH COUGH*

Kazunari: Whoa whoa, Tsuzuroon!?  Did you get too into it to completely flub it!?

Girl A: It’s like instead of Tsuzuroon, we should call you Flubberoon!(1)

Tsuzuru: F-Flubberoon…

Kazunari: Now, now!  Wouldn’t you say that’s Tsuzuroon’s charm?

Tsuzuru: I can’t keep up with you guys!

Misumi: Tsuzuru~ there there~

Tsuzuru: *Sigh*...

ー

Chikage: –so?  How did the mixer go?

Tsuzuru: …

Itaru: With that face I have a guess.

Citron: Ohh, he does not say anything…

Izumi: G-Good work today…!

Tsuzuru: The quality and encouragement of that guess is just what I need right now…

Kazunari: But but~!  It wasn’t ALL bad, right?

Tsuzuru: Huh?

Kazunari: You got a new nickname, didn’t you!

Tsuzuru: …!  Don’t tell them about th–

Misumi: Flubberoon~!

Tsuzuru: AaaaAAAH…!!

Chikage: Flubberoon, huh?  It’s not a bad nickname, Tsuzuru.  Ah, I mean Flubberoon.

Citron: A cute nickname~!  Flu~bberoon!

Itaru: Feel like this is gonna take off, Flubberoon.

Tsuzuru: Don’t say it on purpose!  I mean, I’d like for it to NOT take off!

Chikage: Haha, we’re joking.

Tsuzuru: Ugh, geez…

Izumi: Ts-Tsuzuru-kun.  Should I pour you some tea?  Or some sweets, are you hungry?

Tsuzuru: Director…

Tsuzuru: …in the end, talking with you is the most calming.

Izumi: Huh?

Tsuzuru: …!  No, that…!  I meant that I can talk to you without worrying because I’m used to it…!

Kazunari: Booold, Tsuzuroon!

Itaru: Good thing Masumi isn’t here.

Tsuzuru: Aaah geez… please give me a break…!

Story Clear

--

1. すべるん (suberun), from 滑る (suberu), which can mean “to bomb the delivery of a joke”

[bratkook]

come over. (m) jjk

pairing. jungkook x reader genre. smut, pwp,  warnings. jungkook is a self proclaimed pervert, smut in forms of: mutual masturbation, voyeurism through bedroom windows, rough sex, oral (m receiving), jungkook is a lil mean but just a little, dirty talk, use of vibrator, multiple orgasms, forced orgasm, overstimulation, unprotected sex word count. 7.2k summary. the guilt of being a dirty peeping tom eats Jungkook alive, not knowing this was all part of your elaborate plan to sleep with the new neighborhood eye candy. author’s note. #84 requested by @taestybae​ from this promp list! ty for sending this in bby 🖤 (requests now closed)

Jungkook knows it's wrong, god does he know it's wrong. Acting as if he didn’t mean to leave his blinds cracked open, tilted at just the right angle that allows him to still be able to see out, the view he’s granted being your own window a few feet away. 

It’s funny now, how when he had first purchased the town house he had hated how close his neighbors were to him, and now here he was, an absolute pervert who was thankful for the narrow distance between your buildings.

The self proclaimed pervert simply sits at his desk, mindlessly going through work emails while his eyes continue to drift up, staring through his blinds for any sign of movement. 

Jungkook’s chest feels tight as he waits, eyeing the ticking clock in the corner of his screen and seeing it was nearing nine at night. Maybe you had plans tonight, going out with your friends, mind too preoccupied to indulge the filthy fantasies Jungkook had swirling in his head. It had become his favorite daily activity, sneaking a peek at you, sometimes doing simple things like relaxing with a face mask, or having a dance party. 

Of course those moments were all adorable but his favorite moments were the ones where you would walk around topless or lather lotion on your body after a shower. Sometimes you’d take the teasing a step further, blinds fully opened with only the sheer curtain coming in between him and your shadowed silhouette, caught in the act of what he could only assume was you touching yourself. 

Jungkook used to think it was purely accidental, just a careless neighbor who had no idea his bedroom had the perfect view, but he swore you had made eye contact with him far too many times for this to not be intentional.

Before his mind can spiral further, there’s suddenly a flicker of light and like a magnet, Jungkook’s eyes lock in to their target, seeing you walking into your room with a small towel draped over your shoulder, sports bra and tiny workout shorts showing him how your body was glistening in sweat. 

Pushing off his desk, his chair rolls and squeaks along his floor so he could get a better view, completely invested in seeing the way you get comfortable after your trip to the gym. Call it creepy or call it attentive but Jungkook had grown to know your schedule, you were his neighbor who enjoyed giving him peep shows so it was sort of hard for him not to realize the usual routine you had. However, this was the first time he had seen you come back from the gym this late. 

Jungkook groans now at his realization, palm coming to rub down his face as he hears his own thoughts, behaving like a man who had a notebook where he jotted down your schedule. 

He didn’t, but still, he felt like a creep. A dirty fucking creep. 

With his eyes screwed shut he shuffles the chair back to its rightful spot like a child in time out, angling his body to prevent his wandering eyes from looking through his window once more, the shame once again eating away at him like it did every time. 

Did you really do this on purpose? 

Of course you did, you weren’t stupid. 

The second Jungkook moved into your neighborhood he became the talk of the street, suburban house moms, young teenage girls, even your elderly neighbor had begun to wonder who the cute boy who went jogging down the street was. He oozed sex appeal, not even realizing how swooned he had everyone with his morning workout, he just thought everyone waved and smiled at him out of pure friendliness. 

Although he had no idea how hot he looked, you were blessed with the gift of vision and common sense. It only took you one glance of him exiting his house, long hair partially tied back, running shorts hugging his thighs so beautifully and you were sold. 

The minute you realized he was your next door neighbor it was like a lightbulb went off above your head, it was a blessing in disguise and you were not about to pass up the opportunity to have this go in your favor. Giving him a front row seat to you and everything you had to offer was the cards you chose to play and so far it had been going well. 

That is until you exit the shower, excitement coursing through you, already wondering how you’re going to tease him tonight. With your towel loosely hanging around your chest, you’re ready for the small show, but as you get into your usual position you notice that his blinds are now tightly closed, no gap between the shutters to allow him a peak of you. 

It’s a sudden and very unexpected chain of events. With a small huff of disappointment you perch yourself onto the end of your bed, directly facing your window as you sit in thought, your saucy plans for the night being ruined. 

Wondering just what could have made Jungkook flip a switch like that kept you up at night so when you see him coming in from his run the following morning as you leave for work you don’t think twice about speaking up. 

Your neighbor flinches when you greet him in good morning, not expecting to hear your voice so close to him but he could thank your connected driveways for that. 

“Oh, good morning.” he smiles politely, pulling out his airpod and pausing his music entirely to give you his full attention. The small nerves of being called out bubble up inside of him, only having talked to you once prior he wasn’t really sure where this conversation would go, were you about to call him a disgusting pervert?

“Did you call it a night really early last night?” You bite instantly, soft smile not giving away your true intentions but he knows, the way his eyes widen slightly make it obvious. 

“Yeah,” he sputters out, wiping his sweaty palms on his black shorts, nerves already making his heart skip. You knew, there was absolutely no way you didn’t and this solidified it. He had assumed you did, his guilty conscience making him believe what you did was intentional in order for him not to feel like the peeping Tom he very clearly was, but hearing you sneakily admit to knowing he hadn’t watched you last night made him feel like a bucket of cold water had been dumped over him. 

“Haven’t been getting much sleep lately so..”

You simply nod along as he trails off in a lie, lips spreading out into a smirk as your eyes very obviously give him a once over, focusing on the deep cuts of his sleeves that expose his sides and art filled arm, how the shorts he wears hit above his knee and leave his glorious thighs out for you to see. He was truly blind to his good looks. 

“Sorry I haven’t really given you a proper neighborly welcome, can I have your number?” Already fishing your phone out of your pocket because you knew he wouldn’t say no, still you tack on a helpful lie to make your flirting a little more subtle. “The neighbors have a group chat, I’ll add you to it so you can get all the hot gossip.”

If he knows you're lying he doesn’t show it, instead he looks a tiny bit disappointed that you wanted his number to add him to a neighborhood group chat. Regardless he recites his number with a smile, his phone instantly vibrating in his palm with a text from you, a friendly ‘hi neighbor’ with a waving emoji at the end. 

As he starts to save your contact you open up your car door, grabbing his attention once more. “I’ll text you if I ever need sugar...or other neighborly things.”

The suggestive teasing in your tone isn’t lost on him now, his cheeks flushing at the implications behind your words. “Yeah, whatever you need.” 

He’s admittedly even more disappointed when your message thread runs dry, not even being added to the gossip group chat that he was sort of curious about. You hadn’t even given him a show since the night he shut his blinds but it was all part of your plan, expertly crafted to go in your favor. 

While you’re at work you get the email that sets everything in motion, a notification of your package being out for delivery. A very cute baby pink wand would be placed at your door step in discreet packaging and if things went the way you anticipated it would be making its proper debut tonight, hopefully with an audience of one. 

Jungkook is pulled away from his computer screen when his phone vibrates against his desk, your name illuminated on his homescreen. He pauses for a moment, wondering if this was simply a text initiating him into that damn group chat that he had no idea didn’t actually exist, but when he unlocks it and opens up the thread he sees it's just you. 

Y/N 3:48pm : hi jungkook, sorry to do this but im getting a suuuper important package delivered today could you please keep it safe until i get home later tonight? 🥺🖤

You wanted him to guard a package, just neighborly things, exactly what you said you would text him for. 

Jungkook 3:49pm : sure, what is it?

He feels stupid immediately after hitting send, fingers curling together into fists as his eyes glare at his screen. Why the hell would he ask what the package was? Being a peeping Tom was clearly not enough, no he had to know about your online purchases. 

Y/N 3:52pm : just something for sore muscles 😅

Just like a typical horny boy would, his mind wanders to what exactly could be in the box, quickly texting you an ‘okay!👍🏻’ before locking his phone altogether. He was going to lose his mind. 

All according to plan. 

Jungkook guards that package with his life, placed delicately on his kitchen counter, exactly where he left it the minute he saw the postman drop it off. He’s been glued to his couch since then, regularly looking over his shoulder to ensure the brown box wouldn’t spontaneously disappear. 

Just as he feels himself getting antsy the gentle knocking from his front door has him springing up from his couch, pausing a few feet away from the door as he eyes the knob before looking back at the package. Should he greet you with it in his hands, or would that seem like he was trying to rush you away?

When you knock a second time he opts for just opening the door, seeing you standing there with that friendly smile, a small tweed skirt and matching top showing him you had just got off work, his eyes focusing on your exposed legs for a moment too long until your voice snaps him out of it. 

“Hi Jungkook,” you greet him with that honey sweet voice, the tiny glimmer in your eyes betraying you but he doesn’t spot it. “Did you get my package?”

“Hey, yeah I did.” Leaving the door ajar, he steps further into his home, quickly retrieving the light box and bringing it to you, still patiently waiting with that polite smile as if you didn’t know what was packaged inside that box. 

“You’re a lifesaver!” you cheer, holding it close to your chest with a small sigh, “I don’t know what I would’ve done if this got stolen.”

Jungkook can feel his face warm up, not able to stop his mouth from running on autopilot, unintentionally outing himself as an extremely observant neighbor. “You must be really sore from going to the gym all the time huh?”

There's a silence that falls over you both as you eye him curiously, gaze flickering with the same mischief from earlier, something he can easily spot now and he desperately wants to shrink into himself. 

“Definitely,” you agree with a laugh, “thanks again, have a good night!”

And just like that you’re gone, leaving him with his forehead pressed against his front door as he feels like an idiot. “Really, you must be sore?” He mocks his own voice, rolling his eyes before standing up straight and retreating back into his room to finish the work he had neglected in favor of protecting your package. 

The same package that you were currently clutching onto as you bolted up your stairs with a pair of scissors in the opposite hand, debatably not the safest choice but it had to be done. You feel like a crazed woman as you stab into the clear tape to break the seal, peeling back the flaps and letting out a giddy laugh when you spot the sleek white box, a photo of the device printed on the front. 

With steady hands you pull out the prized toy, carelessly tossing the empty boxes to the side, hearing them land with a light thud. The soft silicone against your thumb fills you with anticipation, a silent click against the first button dulls down the excitement when it refuses to turn on. 

“Stupid fucking chargers.” you grunt, setting the device down and making your way back to the discarded boxes, pulling out the tiny white cable to plug it in. 

The provided pamphlet states a full charge in one hour, plenty of time for you to get a grip on yourself, the last thing you needed was to rip open your blinds and come face to face with your hot neighbor with the crazy eyes you’re sure you were sporting earlier, you really didn’t need to scare him off before the main event. 

Jungkook is none the wiser as he mindlessly scrolls through the endless data in front of him, eyes floating through the numbers in a dazed manner, his mind far too occupied with that stupid package. He knew exactly what it was, proudly deciphering the code of something for sore muscles to spell out vibrator for him in giant neon letters. 

Were you using it now, in your bedroom a good feet away from his own, laid out on your bed directly in his line of sight?

His mind continues to play out salacious scenarios as you finish applying your favorite lotion after the small body shower you took, the silk robe hanging off your shoulder as you bend forward. Your pink toy lays on your bed, the buttons now blinking to indicate a full charge, your plan was now back in motion. 

As you step back into your room and slowly crack open your blinds you realize Jungkook’s are still tightly shut. Looking up into the slowly darkening sky you notice the clouds beginning to loom overhead, a smile spreading on your lips as you think of a way to get Jungkook to open up his blinds for the show. 

Jungkook’s phone buzzes with a text a few seconds later, eyes widening slightly when he realizes it’s from you. 

Y/N 7:02pm : lol does it look like its gonna rain to you?

His head tilts in confusion at your question, nonetheless he stands from his desk, fully sliding up his blinds to stare up at the sky. When he notices the grey clouds he looks down at his phone to start to type, the small flash of movement from across the way making him freeze, looking directly through your window once more and seeing you innocently sitting on your bed, staring right at him with a smile. 

Jungkook can feel how wide his eyes get as he stares at you, leg crossed over the other as you rest back onto your palms, head tilted as you wave at him in greeting. Right where you want him. 

His hand raises up to wave back at you, the voice in his head screaming every obscenity he could think of as he attempts to smile, the grimace in his face making it hard for you not to laugh. 

You start slow, wanting to give him enough time to shut his blinds if he really wants no part in this, your hand coming up to begin pushing the robe off your shoulder further, the first sliver of skin being exposed to his eyes. Jungkook wants to scream, bang his head into the glass as he sees the way your skin glimmers, already knowing you had lathered on that damn lotion of yours. 

When he doesn’t move you let the other sleeve fall down, the swell of your breasts holding up the soft material, shielding them from his sight for another moment. Your eyes never leave his face, needing to see his reaction when you sit up straight and let the material pool around your hips, tits fully exposed for him to see. 

His reaction is well worth it, jaw dropping slightly as he spots the way your nipples harden in the exposed air, forehead nearly ramming into the window when you bring your hand up to pinch and twist at the pebbled buds. He feels his cock stirring in his pants when your head drops back, lips opening up to let out what he knows is the prettiest moan, head leveling out as you bite your lip and stare at him once more. 

Jungkook doesn’t know what to do as he watches you, champagne colored robe still hooked around your elbows as you reach behind your bed and pick up the pink toy you had bought today. The metallic capped bottom shines in the light and he feels like he’s caught in a trance as you showcase it. 

For a moment your attention drops down, landing on your phone as you quickly type out a message before setting it aside once more. His phone comes to life in his hand, nearly scaring him with its vibrations. 

Y/N 7:18pm : touch yourself please

He swears he’s gonna bust his load then and there, typing out a quick ‘okay’, a message you ignore entirely in favor of turning on your toy. The excited look in your eyes is clear as day when the device buzzes in your hand, Jungkook’s eager fingers unbuttoning his jeans as you start to trail the vibrating head along your body, passing over your nipples and gasping at the ticklish feeling. 

Looking across the way once more you see Jungkook’s gaze locked onto you, his body fully illuminated by his bedroom light, allowing you to see his hands start to push his pants down, taking his black briefs with them. Your teeth bite down onto your bottom lip as he raises his palm up to messily spit into it before coming back down to fist his slowly hardening cock. His covered chest rises and falls as he huffs out a breath, slowly squeezing his shaft as he glides up towards his head, coating his palm in the stray beads of precum that drip out of it. 

This further solidified that Jungkook was a pervert, at least in his own mind, who else would be so eager to jack off to the sight of their neighbor this easily. You didn’t think so though, knowing every one of your actions had a purpose, Jungkook wasn’t a pervert for being a predictable boy, he was doing exactly what you wanted him to do. 

As the head of your toy trails down your chest you take your time, circling your navel before reaching your hips, sliding down your thighs as you lean further back and begin to spread them apart. In a slow movement that Jungkook can’t look away from, you finally reveal yourself to him, folds glistening with your arousal, coating your inner thighs, allowing the toy to glide with ease. 

Jungkook groans loudly as you pass the buzzing toy over your clit, a featherlike touch that makes you twitch and moan, his hand tightening around his cock as he twists on the way up. You were absolutely sin personified, giving him a show as you tease yourself, mouth dropped open as you finally press the toy against your clit, fingers slipping into your entrance and pumping inside of you. He can only imagine the way you sound as you stretch yourself open, hips rolling up into your hand as the pleasure jolts through you. 

Fuck, what he would do to be able to touch you, hear your moans, be the one to hold that toy against you until you were writhing around. 

You can see it in his eyes, the want clouding them as he watches you, his hand steadily pumping his length, quickening up each time your body twitches. When you pull the toy away his brows furrow, releasing his cock as he places his sticky palm against the window, wondering just what you were planning now as you reach for your phone once more. 

It only takes you a few seconds to type out the message and hit send, looking up at him with that same predatory gaze you’ve been wearing all night. As he unlocks his phone again you stand up, letting the robe fully slide off your body, pooling around your feet as you step closer to your window, arms crossed under your chest to push your tits out further as you watch him. 

Y/N 7:32pm : come over

He rereads the message three times, cock still out for you to see as he contemplates his options, finally looking back up and nearly choking when he sees the way you’re almost pressed against your own window, a sweet smile on your lips as you wave him over. That helps him make his decision, locking his phone and groaning as he slips his cock back into his briefs and shimmies his pants back on. 

Your eyes gleam as he turns to exit his room, the light dimming off as he bolts down his stairs towards his front door. When he steps out onto his porch he sees the ground is damp, small droplets now falling from the sky, the chill creeping through his thin layers as he navigates across your connected driveways with his palms covering his extremely prominent bulge. 

“Please be unlocked,” he whispers under his breath when he gets to your door, turning the knob and sighing in relief when it unlocks. Jungkook doesn’t care about manners as he steps in, locking the door behind him and instantly climbing the stairs two at a time, already knowing where your room was since your house was a mirror copy of his own. 

When he finally pushes his door open he finds you perched on your bed, fully naked and waiting for him with that same toy trailing up and down your torso. The need for introductions are thrown out the window as he crosses the room, immediately settling beside you, his large hand cupping your cheek to pull you in for a kiss. 

It catches you by surprise, the normally shy neighbor who got nervous whenever you caught him staring, never expecting him to be the type to go after what he wanted like this but the way he takes control makes you lean into his touch. His lips are tender against yours, hand guiding your face closer as he slowly licks his way into your mouth, a moan of approval leaving you as his warm tongue tickles yours. 

You’d often fantasized about kissing him, wondering if he was the type to tease, to pull back and leave you wanting more but the desperation guides his movements, stops him from not fulfilling his own desires. Jungkook kisses you with passion, hunger leading him until he’s pushing you flat on your back, hands dropping down to gently hold onto your neck. 

The toy is cast to the side, your own hands sliding through his long hair as you sigh into his mouth, the wet smacks of each kiss filling your ears. 

“Take it off,” you mumble against his lips, trailing your hands down his back and tugging his shirt up, determined to rip it off of him to finally see the glorious body you know he has. Jungkook presses a quick kiss against you before kneeling up and pulling his shirt off by his neckline, each inch of exposed skin making your mouth water. 

The way his muscles rippled, pulled taut as he stretches out and tosses the black long sleeve aside, bulging out when he finally relaxes, you can’t help but let your fingers trace each ridge on his stomach. Jungkook lets you take him in, not opposed to the lust swirling in your eyes, your tongue licking over your lips as you admire him, following the lines of each tattoo up his arm until you reach his face. 

“Like what you see?” he murmurs, looking down at you with lidded eyes, letting them roam along your body, the swell of your tits that rise with each breath, how your hips can’t keep still, searching for any bit of friction you could find. 

“You’re fucking unreal.”

He holds his breath when you begin undoing his pants, in a hurry to see his cock without the distance between you. “This is what you wanted isn’t it?” he realizes, the completely unphased look on your face, the perfectly executed texts and package delivery, just knowing that he had done everything you wanted him to do. 

“It was fun though wasn’t it Jungkook, tell me–“ he helps you tug his jeans down, his briefs going with them and joining his shirt on the floor, “What did you like more, seeing me do everyday things or watching me play with myself?”

A choked groan slips past his lips as you wrap your hand around his cock, slowly sliding up his length as you question him, enjoying the way he struggles to respond. “God you’re filthy,” he grunts, jaw slack as you sit up, face now level with his cock as he rests on his knees. 

The sly smirk you give him shows that you know this, know exactly how filthy you are, using it to your advantage to get what you wanted. With bated breath he watches the way you inch forward, tongue sticking out to gently lick the swollen head of his cock, the salty bead of precum picked up by your tongue. 

“Can’t help it.” You sink onto him as the words leave your mouth, lips wrapping around him and he sighs at the warmth that envelops him, the wetness of your tongue circling his tip making his stomach tense up, muscles flexing to keep himself from thrusting into your throat. 

The small moan you let out as he fills your mouth makes his body rattle, the feeling of his dick heavy on your tongue as you slide further down, wrapping your hand around the base to steady yourself. This was much more satisfying than seeing him play with himself a few feet away, the sighs of appreciation that float in the air each time you pull back make you keep going, wanting to see him fall apart. 

Jungkook doesn’t know when his hands tangle themselves in your hair, taking it upon himself to guide you up and down his length, starting a filthy rhythm that lit his body up. He urges you down more, hands coaxing you, pushing you further onto him until you’re choking as he fills your throat. He doesn’t think you’ve ever looked prettier, eyes full of tears, nose pressed against his stomach as you hum around his cock. 

He pulls you off of him a few seconds later, the wet gasp you let out ripping through the air as you catch your breath but that sly smile remains on your face, eyeing his messy length, bobbing slightly as he moves around. 

Leaning over you once more his hands cup your face, thumb rubbing under your eyes where he spots the unshed tears threatening to spill over, collecting against your lower lashes. “Fuck, I bet you’re pretty when you cry.”

The rasp in his voice makes your stomach flip, more wetness coating your thighs and further ruining your sheets. “Make me,” you whisper, smiling when his eyebrows raise in question. “Make me cry Jungkook.”

His cock throbs at your response, wanting nothing more than to do what you want, turn you into a crying mess as you beg for him like he often thought about. “You sure?”

With a small nod you’re crawling backwards, flipping yourself over onto your hands and knees, arching your back for him as he eyes your exposed cunt, sodden folds shining when you wiggle your hips. “I’m sure.”

Jungkook fists his cock as he approaches you, slotting his knees between your thighs, inching forward until he’s circling your entrance in a teasing motion. Flashes of the way you had spread yourself open minutes prior play in his mind as he slowly breaches your entrance, the first feeling of you taking his breath away, eyes falling shut as you let out the first moan. 

Your hands fist the sheets as he stretches you open, his size filling you up so deliciously, inch by inch splitting you open. He can’t look away from it, mesmerized with the way you take him in, molding around him like he was meant to be there. 

A whimper leaves you as he presses his palms onto your ass, holding you still once he finally bottoms out, hips pressed flush against you, walls fluttering around him as he gives you time to adjust to his size. 

“This is–“ you groan when he slides back a little, “this is just how I pictured it.” The laughter laced in your voice piques his interest, leaning over your body to see you with your face pressed against your sheets, a teasing smile on your face. 

“Yeah?” Jungkook questions, tightening his grip on your ass, fingers digging into the soft flesh, no doubt marking them for you to see later. “You pictured getting fucked from behind by your neighbor?”

“Mhm,” you squeal out, giggling when he starts to fuck into you, pulling out nearly all the way before thrusting back in, the small smack of your skin mixing in with your laughter and moans. 

“I knew it,” he grunts, trailing his hand up your spine, around your neck until his palm was pressing your face into the mattress, holding you down as he ravished you, stretched you apart and turned your impure thoughts into mush. “Knew you did it on purpose, fuck, do you know how guilty I felt?”

Your walls tighten around him and he moans out at the feeling, the warmth sucking him back in each time he pulled out, the wet squelch of you soaking his cock getting louder each time. 

“S-sorry.” It's quiet, but he knows you don’t mean it, knows the words are lace with trouble as you start to rut back onto him, the playful smile felt against his palm spelling it out for him. 

“Oh you’re sorry?” Jungkook picks up his merciless pace, knowing he found the right rhythm when you let out a cry of surprise, arching further for him and keening as he nudges against your sweet spot, the first sparks of your orgasm flashing within you. The fact that you were getting what you want sending you closer to the edge faster than expected. 

“No, I’m not,” you admit, shamelessly moaning with each thrust. There was no way in hell you were sorry, if this was the outcome you’d do it all again the same exact way. Jungkook wouldn’t argue with that, the earlier guilt he felt long gone, replaced with pure hunger, only increasing when your moans start to get breathier, the panting felt against his hand, hot and heavy as you whimpered. 

“I know you’re not, you love putting on a show for me huh, knowing I was watching you from my window while you fucked with me.”

His words make your mind spin, the intoxicating roll of his hips dragging you under into the same state of desperation he was in, weeks of mindless torture fueling the both of you with more than enough sexual frustration. 

“I loved it,” you whine when he pushes your face harder into the sheets, the roughness he’s displaying making your stomach flip, thighs spreading out further for him and you let out a trembling moan when he sinks deeper into you. 

You were going to cum, he recognized the way your body tightened up, walls clamping around him, making him curse as he continues to rut into you. Jungkook smiles as you cry out, chest pushing into your mattress, hands pulling at your sheets in desperation until suddenly, you’re cumming with a shout of his name, the feeling taking you completely by surprise. “F-fuck, Jungkook.”

He gasps as you gush around him, dripping down your thighs, creaming his cock until it's slick with your arousal. Jungkook doesn’t waste any time pulling out of you, needing to see your face as he sank back into you, now on your back with a dazed out smile. 

A soft groan drips off your tongue, thick and needy when he bottoms out once more, arms wrapping around his shoulders as he starts to rock into you, forehead sweaty with his long hair falling around his face. It frames him perfectly, a simple curtain letting you see every expression he gives you, a private show just for you to witness. 

“Wanna make you cry,” he confesses, bending down and kissing your chest, his right hand mindlessly swatting at the bed until he finds exactly what he’s looking for, that damn vibrator he had guarded with his life earlier. 

The second the small vibrations meet your ears, your eyes go wide, catching the evil smirk on his lips as he holds the toy between you, fidgeting with the settings until it’s low enough to start. “Wait Jungkook, I’m sensitive.”

He leans back enough to trail the head down your stomach, taunting you as he circles your hips and reaches your mound. “You told me to make you cry though didn’t you baby?”

The excitement rushes through you once more, letting out shaky gasp as he just barely touches your sensitive clit, your body jolting and squeezing around his cock. Jungkook shuts his eyes at the feeling, bringing it back to rest against the tiny pearl, the low settings making a hum course through you, your fingers digging into his shoulders. 

“Ah, Jungkook,” you cry, chest heaving as he starts to fuck you again, hips swirling around, unsure if you want to retreat from the toy or press against it harder, the slight sting of pain morphing into pleasure the longer he keeps it up. 

“What?” he mocks, raising the settings until you’re shouting, a delirious laugh following suit as your thighs tighten around his waist in reflex. Jungkook knows you love this, your teeth biting down onto your bottom lip as you stare at him with glassy eyes full of tears, urging him to fuck you harder, begging him for more. 

He does what you ask, pistoning his hips into you with enough force to jostle your body, the head of his cock just shy of hitting your cervix, waves of pleasure mixing in with the vibrations against your clit. Jungkook can feel his own orgasm creeping up on him, crawling up his spine, goosebumps flaring out on his skin, each wet thrust and cry from you only pushing him closer. 

Jungkook watches you carefully, lost in his own pleasure but focused enough to see the way your eyes well up further, the needy sobs you release as he fucks you just right wrapping around him and urging him on, not wanting to hold back when this is what you’ve been wanting. 

The small inkling to be mean and actually see the tears fall spurs something inside of him. With a few more clicks the vibrator hits the highest setting, buzzing intensely against your clit and you nearly thrash at the sudden feeling, back arching up as you gasp. 

Jungkook chuckles, the low timbre making you whimper as he presses the head of the toy harder against you. “You gonna cum again, make a big mess around my cock?”

“Jungkook,” it’s a choked cry of his name, your arms seeking purchase around his frame, needing something to ground you as you start to float off. 

“C’mon, wanna see you cry.” He watches in awe as your body tenses of for a moment, the pleasure catching just right to push you over. 

“Fuck, fuck–“ you chant, words slurring together as a second orgasm is pulled out of you, eyes rolling back when the euphoric feeling crashes over you, tears finally spilling over and body turning limp as he continues to fuck you through it just like the last one. He feels like he won as the wetness pools under your eyes, brows furrowing together as you mewl at the feeling of your orgasm cresting, heartbeat slowing in your chest as you come down. 

“So good,” he mumbles at the high vibrations felt against his cock, the flutters from your velvety walls keeping him from turning it off, sliding it down a bit closer to your entrance until he’s gasping as well. 

“Too much,” you plead, eyes misty as you stare at him, mouth dropping open in a quiet moan when he ruts against you in search of his own release. His free hand reaches up to cup your cheek, wiping away the stray tears that had fallen against your skin. 

“I knew you’d look pretty when you cry.” He sighs, shutting his eyes when you pulse around his length. “I’m almost there, you okay?”

His concern makes you smile, nodding as you place your hand over his own on your face, dealing with the oversensitivity for him to get his own release. “Yeah, cum inside me please.”

Jungkook groans in response, sliding the vibrator further down until it rests against the base of his cock, gliding along his length with each of his thrusts, the buzzing making his body tingle. 

“Shit,” he grunts out, hips fucking you with more urgency, rutting against you sloppily, eyes opening up to stare directly at you and the lustfilled look you give him is what pushes him over. A choked groan dies in his throat when he sinks into you as deep as he can, spurts of his cum filling you up as his face twists in pleasure, mouth dropped open to release a soft moan that you swallow with a sweet kiss.  

You hum against his lips when he thrusts shallowly a few more times until finally coming to a halt, turning off the toy and chucking it aside with no care before collapsing on top of you in pure dramatics. Jungkook has no qualms about how much he weighs, making himself right at home as he nuzzles into your chest, sighing in content when you rake your fingers through his hair. 

“I feel sweaty, and I know I made a mess on your sheets.” Jungkook mumbles out, cheek pressed against your tits, eyes slipped shut with his slowly softening cock still inside of you. No doubt would your sheets be damp with an unholy mixture of the night's debauchery, something you would surely deal with later. 

“It’s okay, I like the mess.” Your words are meant to be joking but the way his cock twitches inside you shows he takes everything you say seriously, simply rolling your eyes with a smile as you tease him further. “You’re a pervert.”

Jungkook scoffs at this now, taking full offense as he pulls out of you with an accusatory glare, eyes zeroing in on your evil smile as you prop yourself up against your headboard. “I’m the pervert?” When you nod he laughs loudly, finger pointing at you in a less than threatening manner, “Says the one who gave me free shows every night!”

“It’s not my fault you’re easy to rope in, you were hooked the second you saw me have that dance party in here huh?”

He nods instantly, knowing exactly what night you were talking about, it was the night he had moved in, before you had even realized he was your neighbor, having a full on dance party to some top 40’s from the 2000’s playlist you found. That was the first night he ever saw you and ever since then he had left his blinds cracked just to see a glimpse of you, not knowing what lewd ideas you had planned. 

“Was it the facemask that did it for you?” You laugh, playfully nudging his side with your foot as he glares, the small smile on his face showing you he wasn’t taking this seriously. 

“No, it was those sexy ass boyshorts you had on, I think they were grey. They made your ass look nice.”

He laughs with you as you squeal, knowing exactly what pair of underwear you had on, the oversized shirt doing nothing to hide them as you danced around like a lunatic. 

“Is this gonna be a thing?” he wonders, taking it upon himself to enter your bathroom to grab a towel, the least he could do was clean up the mess he had caused between your thighs. 

“What?”

“Should I text you about the weather tomorrow, call you over to mine this time? I’ll let you choke me if you’re into that.” He says it so casually it catches you by surprise, a cackle leaving you as he finishes cleaning you up, handing you your robe to cover up as he slips back into his underwear. 

“Are you into that?”

“I could be,” he winks, flopping onto your bed beside you, letting his hand trail up your thigh until it reaches the hem of your robe, tracing the goosebumps that flare up because of it. 

That was definitely something you could work with, mind already planning out the next time you’d torture your neighbor, wondering just how your hands would look like wrapped around his thick neck. Maybe you could see if he looked pretty when he cried. 

He spots the mischief in your face instantly but before he could indulge you further, there was one thing absolutely eating away at his mind. “By the way, you never added me to that gossip group chat.”

Your lips purse into a tight smile as your fingers return to his hair, twirling each strand as you hold back a laugh, knowing it absolutely did not exist. You weren’t in the mood to crush his spirit, knowing he desperately wanted to know the ins of the neighborhood gossip so you simply shrug in faux apology, telling yet another white lie. “My bad, I’ll add you tomorrow.”

It’s good enough for Jungkook pressing a kiss against your thigh as he thinks of what the following night will bring, his mind also picturing just how cute your hands would look around his neck. 

[thebrightsessions]

Entertainment Spotlight: Briggon Snow

Briggon Snow is a Los Angeles-based actor, writer and creator, originally from South Portland, Maine. He is known for voicing Caleb Michaels in The Bright Sessions and The College Tapes, and roles in The Big Loop (Podcast), Seal Team (CBS), Game Shakers (Nickelodeon) and Masters of Sex (Showtime).

Can you share any fun facts about the making of The Bright Sessions and/or The College Tapes that fans would be surprised to find out?

Oh boy. I was just wracking my brain on this and struggling™. “Should I mention the obvious: That we did this remotely? Talk about those challenges?” And then moments ago my husband stepped out onto our balcony where I was staring at my laptop, read this question, and made a very cheeky suggestion. So here we go:

Everyone loves kissing in audio, right? *crickets* No? Only some of you? Well, I know it’s a hot-button topic, but when it comes to squishy romance feelings I’m here for it, I’ll admit. And well, we recorded this in a pandemic, so...no kissing allowed. And how did we get around that? Well, as one of our illustrious and poor defenseless audio designers got to e̶x̶p̶e̶r̶i̶e̶n̶c̶e̶ suffer through...I sent over “roll-the-tape” recordings of me pulling my husband into my home recording booth to - essentially - makeout for all of your enjoyment/cringes. Now...who’s kissing in The College Tapes? You’ll have to wait and hear (again sorry) because...well...reasons...

If you could have a conversation with Caleb, what would you want to talk about?

I’d love to go on trail with him or go camping and just talk about...feelings. I know the feelings/emotions thing is a constant for him so this is a little on the nose - but in playing Caleb and now writing for him too - I was challenged to submerge myself in my heart and mind and body and meditate with the emotions that pass me by every day. Lauren’s writing gave me a roadmap to identify and place things within myself outside of recording (a gift I’ll never be able to repay). And in these last five years I’ve found myself endlessly fascinated with human emotionality and our awareness or lack thereof and how we move throughout life in relationship with the things we feel. I’d love to look Caleb in the eyes and have us be unabashedly open with each other; the good, the bad, the everything.

Do you have a memory from college or young adulthood that you think would make a good College Tapes scene or episode?

It’s funny. I pulled on so many memories and feelings from my time at college. There’s one particular story involving greek life and my freshman roommate that I absolutely stole when writing my episodes. But I have one memory that’s so...nothing really...but so powerful in my life that I’d like to share...

My best friend in college ended up showing me Avatar: The Last Airbender, and when we’d watch it in his dorm, we would naturally smoosh up on his bed and cuddle under a blanket. And for me, a gay kid - just cuddling up with my straight best friend because we loved each other - and it not being weird or joked about when our friends were around - meant - like - everything to me.

Again, not a big crazy college memory. But let’s hear it for the straight boys out there dismantling toxic masculinity one soft action at a time!

If you could be Atypical in real life, would you want to be? If yes, what powers do you think that you would have?

I want to be an Atypical! I’d love to be able to communicate with anyone (+ animals) regardless of language. I want to know people. I love meeting people. I think one of the greatest privileges of being an actor is that we’re thrown together with other folks who (if it’s going right) open themselves up to you and participate in a created intimacy to seek understanding. More than anything, I’m curious and want to be influenced by other perspectives in this life - and the idea of being able to connect with and learn from a person in Morocco or even an Orca Whale off the coast of Washington is *heart eyes*.

Do you have any headcanons (something that you believe to be true that isn’t explicitly stated) about Caleb?

I don’t know if I’m going against actual canon here. After 5 years it’s hard to keep track of what’s in what episode in The Bright Sessions universe. But I’ve always imagined Caleb as a closet master chef of sorts. I think he learned to cook out of necessity growing up; odd hours for practices and games and his parents being a little scattered. And I think by college, Caleb is super impressive in the kitchen. The kitchen - like the gym or sport or nature - is one of his churches.

Can you share your favorite piece of The Bright Sessions fan art?

There have been so many incredible pieces of fan art over the years and I’ve loved them all. It’s wild how transformative fandoms can be. You never know what aspect of a character or a story is going to take hold in a person’s imagination, and all of the different headcanons and pieces of art our strange and unusual family has shared over the years continues to be my favorite part of being in the cast of The Bright Sessions.

(Grayson, ghostcribs)

I’ve always adored Grayson’s imagining of Caleb and Adam. Grayson is one of my very favorite artists ever; so much so that I eventually - nervously - reached out, and now he and I have started work on a little project of our own. And I love that. We all get to (and I think have the responsibility to if we can) inspire each other with what we put out into the world. It’s call and answer and it makes for the best stuff.

Thanks for taking the time, Briggon! Catch The College Tapes, only on Luminary. 

[honeypiehotchner]

Satan’s Waterfall (Hotch x Fem!Reader) -- one shot

I couldn’t think of a name for this to save my life, but Satan’s waterfall is literally what I call my period so... (Also this is 100% self-insert because my period was from actual HELL yesterday)

I wrote this instead of doing my homework. Enjoy xx

Word count: 2.4k

Warnings: SMUT! period sex in the shower, “good girl” is said many times, Daddy kink (a lil), slight size kink (it’s inevitable with him), you and Hotch are newly married (I wrote “husband” organically and kept it)

It’s the second day of your period.

The first day is always the worst. The cramps are so severe that you’re nauseated (sometimes actually to the point of puking your guts out) and dizzy, freezing but somehow sweating, hungry but in too much pain to bring yourself to eat more than some crackers, and in desperate need of chocolate or coffee -- even though both of those things make everything else a thousand times worse.

You’re on birth control -- which was Aaron’s first question when he witnessed your period for the first time, completely on accident because you forgot you invited him over when your period was scheduled to hit. So, needless to say, it was maybe your fourth date night ever with your now-husband, and he had to hold your hair back as you puked. You had meant to reschedule that night, but you honestly weren’t feeling too bad until halfway through the movie the two of you decided to watch.

Regardless, birth control helps regulate your period and put it on a schedule, but so far it hasn’t done much to help the pain. Although, you used to pass out, and you don’t anymore, so maybe birth control has helped in a slight way.

Aaron doesn’t think it has at all. He still worries every single month, threatening to take time off of work (at least on the first day) to be with you, but you always tell him not to. You essentially threaten to become an unsub if he doesn’t take his ass to work, but he doesn’t find the joke as funny as you do.

Sometimes he’ll stay home because he’ll wake up and you’ll be in a shivering mess on the bathroom floor, or wide-awake next to him in bed (did anyone say period-induced insomnia?), or groaning to yourself quietly on the couch, having been there for hours so as not to disturb him.

Which is how yesterday went, actually, so that’s why he’s not home today because you told him if he stays home again to coddle you, you might become a fuming toddler.

Thankfully (but unfortunately for him), Chief Strauss called a meeting, so he had no choice but to go to work.

The second days aren’t even that bad. You’re still basically bed-ridden (or couch-ridden, at least, because the TV is in the living room), but you’re not puking and you’re not dizzy. You occasionally sweat like crazy when a wave of cramps comes, but nothing like yesterday.

You’ve showered, changed into new sweatpants and one of Aaron’s old t-shirts, had breakfast and lunch, and you’ve even done a load of laundry (mainly because you bled through the sheets last night). You’re having a much better day.

But, because it’s still that time of the month, it isn’t a great day because you’re still cramping. And lucky you, a bad wave hits right when Aaron walks in from work.

“I told you to let me stay today,” he says gently, pushing the hair back from your sweaty forehead.

“These are nothin’,” you whine, reaching out for his hand to hold anyway. “They’ll be gone soon.”

“You’re pale. Have you eaten?”

“Mhm, breakfast and lunch,” you nod, letting your eyes slip closed when the cramps ease. You feel your heating pad getting cold. It must’ve turned off. You start fumbling around for the controller, but Aaron beats you to it, turning it back on.

“That’s good,” he says. “What about water?”

“Oh, oops,” you chuckle. “I had one glass this morning.”

“And?”

“Anddd coffee.”

“Y/N…” He sighs. “What have I told you?”

“Yeah, yeah, I need to drink extra water when I’m like this. But here’s my thing: I’m suffering enough already, why make me suffer more by making me drink water?”

“Because it’s good for you,” he mutters, standing to fill a glass. “And you’re drinking more tonight. I don’t care if you’re up peeing all night--”

“I’ll wake you up every damn time I do.”

“Gladly,” he smirks, returning with the glass. “Come on, up. Drink.”

Begrudgingly, you sit up, muttering curses under your breath because now your back is cold which means you’re hurting more. Wordlessly, Aaron lifts the heating pad and holds it to your back while you drink some water.

“Good girl,” he says, taking the empty glass from you and sitting it on the coffee table.

“Don’t say that to me,” you grumble, already laying back down and grabbing a blanket, tucking it under your chin.

“Why not?” He asks, smoothing your hair again, smiling when you close your eyes.

“Because it gives me thoughts.”

“Thoughts?”

You open your eyes a little. “Thoughts.”

Aaron chuckles when you close your eyes again, effectively hiding from him. “Honey pie, you’re going to have to tell me what thoughts you’re talking about.”

“You know what thoughts I’m talking about,” you breathe. “Sexy thoughts.”

“Ahh, sexy thoughts,” he laughs.

“But I can’t have those right now.”

“Why not?”

“Hello?” You open your eyes, giving him a look. “It’s the time of Satan’s waterfall?”

“Satan’s-- Okay, just because you’re on your period, doesn’t mean we can’t have sex. It might make you feel better.”

“Oh, orgasms do, yes. I’ve had two today.”

He raises his eyebrows.

“Don’t give me that look. My issue is, I want you inside me when you call me a good girl.”

“I still can be.”

You scrunch your nose. “Too messy. I just washed the sheets.”

“Not in bed,” Aaron squeezes your hand. “We have a shower.”

You quirk an eyebrow. “Is my husband into period sex?”

He laughs loudly. “I’ve always thought about it, but you’re always in so much pain, I didn’t want to ask.”

“We’ve done worse things than have sex while I’m bleeding.”

“Yeah, but…” He lifts your hand to kiss your knuckles. “I never want to hurt you.”

You can’t help but grab his face and kiss him then, too overcome with love for him to stop yourself. His care, his tenderness. You’ve asked him to throw you around like a literal ragdoll before, and yet he’s still worried about hurting you.

“You know I’ll tell you,” you whisper, stealing another kiss. “You never hurt me. At least not in ways I don’t like.”

He groans into your mouth. “Time for a shower.”

“Already?” You giggle, wrapping your arms around his neck.

He lifts you from the couch and guides your legs around his torso, all the while keeping his lips on yours. He digs his fingers into your thighs and you squeal, allowing him to slip his tongue into your mouth.

You have no idea how he manages to get to the bathroom without knocking into anything, but you’re not questioning it.

He sets you down and you start ripping off your clothes, and he joins you after turning the shower on.

“Someone’s excited,” he chuckles, feeling your fingers on his belt. All you have on are your panties, but he’s still got pants on which is unfair.

“Hey, you suggested it, so I want it.”

“Okay, okay,” he tosses his belt out into the bedroom, laughing because you’re already unbuttoning and unzipping him. “You are eager.”

“I’m horny,” you correct him. “And it’s your fault.”

“I know, sweet girl,” he kisses your forehead. “But I’ll take care of it.”

“You better.”

While he’s busy finishing undressing, you kick your panties away and hop in the shower, adjusting the temperature.

Aaron steps in a moment later, a stupid grin on his face. “Hi.”

“Hi yourself,” you reply, relaxing under the hot water. “This feels good.”

His face softens. “Are you hurting again?”

“Not really,” you roll your shoulders. “Don’t get shy on me now.”

“I’m not,” he promises, rubbing his hands up and down your arms. “I don’t want to hurt you.”

“Trust me, I’ll be fine,” you tug him closer, tilting your head to accept his kiss.

He starts slow, wanting to gauge your reactions before he does anything too drastic. He rubs your clit gently, waiting until he hears a moan before he continues. When his tongue slips into your mouth, one finger sinks into your core.

It’s different, that he’ll admit. You feel warmer and wetter, but you’re definitely not in any pain. Your moans are too loud for that.

He dips his head to your neck, suckling there, letting you thread your fingers in his hair while he slips a second finger into you. You gasp a little too loud and a little too suddenly, so he stops, but quickly starts again when your fingernails dig into his scalp in protest.

“Are you okay?” He mumbles against the hickey on your neck.

“More,” you whimper.

He scissors his fingers, wrapping his free arm around your waist to keep you steady. The added pressure of three of his fingers buried inside you nearly makes your knees buckle. Everything about him is so big and it makes you weak when you even as much as think about it.

He moves back to your lips, kissing you deeply, pausing only to ask, “How does that feel, little one?”

“M’gonna cum,” is your only reply, your eyes squeezed shut.

“Go ahead,” he whispers. “As much as you want, sweet girl. This is all about making you feel good. There you go.” He feels the first flutterings of your walls. He spreads his fingers slightly, knowing you love the stretch, when his fingers press right into your g-spot. “Come on, honey. Let go.” He moves his thumb to your clit, rubbing small circles before spreading his fingers once more, shooting you over the edge.

You cling to his shoulders, nearly biting him from the force of it. Everything is so much more sensitive when you’re on your period and you knew that, but it’s different when it’s him. It always is.

“That’s my good girl,” he murmurs, easing you to the ending waves of your orgasm. “How was that?”

“Amazing, do you even need to ask?” You laugh, kissing him. “Can you please get inside me?”

“Please what?”

“Please, Daddy.” You bat your eyelashes for good measure, even though you know he wouldn’t tease you, not right now. He just wanted to hear you say it.

“Of course,” he steals another kiss before finally taking his fingers from you. Wordlessly, he washes the blood away, and you should’ve known he wouldn’t give two shits about this.

And you’re right, he doesn’t. The sight of blood doesn’t phase him anymore, especially not your period because it’s natural. And right now he’s too worried about making you feel good to even bother pretending to be grossed out by it.

He’s already hard, so you can’t help but reach down and stroke him, grinning when he groans loudly.

Before you can blink, though, he has you up in his arms and against the wall, your legs already settling around his hips.

“Tell me if I hurt you,” he says again, looking into your eyes. “Okay?”

“Yes, I promise,” you assure him.

Accepting that answer, he drops his hand to guide himself inside of you, moving as slow as possible -- which you appreciate, even if you do want to be fucked. But you’ve never had sex on your period before, not even with previous partners, so you weren’t sure if having a dick inside you would actually feel good.

But damn it does.

You know part of it is because it’s Aaron, your husband, your best friend. His dick is good on a normal day, but when you’re sensitive from your period, it’s even better.

“Oh my fucking God.”

“What?” He stops moving, leaning his head back to look at you. “What’s wrong?”

“Nothing,” you laugh, threading your fingers through his hair again. “Nothing. It feels good.”

He smirks, rocking his hips slowly, letting you take more of him. “Feels good?” He asks, and you nod. “Is it wrong of me to enjoy this?” He whispers, going deeper. “You’re so warm.”

“Harder, please.”

He slams his hips forward, nipping at your neck when you whine loudly. “Are you gonna cum again?”

You nod your head lazily, locking your ankles behind his back, arching your back, forcing him deeper. A groan stutters in his throat when he feels his head teasing your cervix.

You like that normally, but his paranoia has him pulling back. “Are you--”

“If you don’t shut up and fuck me.”

He doesn’t question you after that, especially not with the lethal look you had in your eyes.

With no more hesitations, Aaron finally gives in. Every thrust is deep, yet you still push your hips up, trying to take even more. He’s never seen you like this, this greedy and almost animalistic in the way you’re chasing your orgasm.

He lets you guide him, staying still when you pull him in as deep as he can go and hold him there. He nearly explodes a few times, having to stay still while your walls pulsate around him.

Soon you’re quite literally thrown into your second orgasm when Aaron’s thumb rubs your clit as he pushes in deep, staying there, letting you squirm until he tells you to let go, and you do.

“Good girl,” he whispers, kissing your cheek lovingly. “That’s my good girl.”

Once your orgasm has settled down, he carefully lifts you off of him, setting you back on your feet. A puzzled look crosses your face.

“What?”

“You didn’t…”

He smiles. “I told you, I wanted to make you feel good.”

“And you did, but--”

“It’s okay, sweet girl.” He kisses your forehead once before turning to rinse off his dick, but you’re not giving up that easily.

You sneak your hands around his waist, resting your cheek on the middle of his back while you swat his hands out of the way.

“Little girl...what do you think you’re doing?”

“Making you feel good,” you murmur, gently stroking him.

It doesn’t take long for him to cum with a muffled cuss word under his breath. You sigh happily against his back, letting go of his dick to hug him instead.

Aaron turns around to gather you in his arms, moving forward slightly so your face isn’t directly under the water. “Is someone tired?”

You shake your head, even though you practically bury yourself in his chest. “Just content.”

“Feeling better?”

“Much,” you giggle. “Thank you.”

“Of course,” he kisses your forehead. “Let’s get you cleaned up.”

[isagisyoichi]

PINKY STAR (RUN) :｡･:*:･ﾟ’★,｡･:*:･ﾟ’☆

SYNOPSIS: isagi as your boyfriend

CHARACTERS INCLUDED: isagi yoichi my boyfriend of many several years

WARNINGS: swearing? i think idk i forget also yah pretend they all go to the same school and stuff. also horribly self indulgent if u couldn't already tell

A/N: if you remember my old one delete it from your memory it was literally so bad help anyways the re-up because my boyfriend deserves better. also i really like this one and i feel like it’s more in character for him :P lol i've had this in my drafts for like, ever <3 but also my last post for a while because i have ap exams and my sat soon :P

FOR: the anon that asked me where my original isagi bf hcs went :’)

after the initial awkwardness of being in a new relationship fades and you two become comfortable with each other, a relationship with isagi would be like dating your slightly awkward best friend who you make out with sometimes.

like, i don’t really see isagi being high maintenance, so i feel like a relationship with him would definitely be on the relaxed side, but still romantic, you know?

isagi’s inner monologue is so funny and he definitely lets his thoughts out to you. it makes you laugh to see your usually friendly-to-all boyfriend have his moments, too.

you guys are one of those couples that give each other a look when someone’s doing something weird in public #telepathicconnection <3

but, isagi’s really such a sweetie with you. i know user isagisyoichi may be slightly biased when they say this, but believe me when i say that isagi’s 100% boyfriend material.

walks you to class whenever he can. always either holding your hand as he listens attentively to you complaining about school.

writes down things he feels are important about you in a digital note entitled “y/n 💗,” so he can remember them in the future.

isagi's used to talking to all kinds of people, so even if you're not the most talkative, he can adjust with no problem.

and he’ll always entertain you about whatever stupid conversation you wanna have.

kinda basic with pet names. babe, baby, dork (he would, i don’t wanna hear it), are his usual rotation.

randomly compliments you/says these really romantic things out of nowhere because he can’t control himself and often blurts things out.

“yeah, of course, when we get married, i’ll-”

“when we get married?” you inquire as you cut isagi off. you two have never discussed marriage, just but the thought of isagi wanting to spend the rest of his life with you is enough to make your head spin.

isagi’s eyes go wide when he realizes what he’s said. damn his mouth that moves faster than his mind.

swallowing hard and taking a breath, isagi says, “y-yeah, when we get married,” further affirming his statement with a nod, albeit a bit of a nervous one.

now both of you guys are flustered LOL.

likes to sit his head in your lap and have you play with his hair, while you two talk or just sit in silence.

such a good listener, perfect person to rant about anything with. he’s very understanding, he’ll hold you if you need him to, wipe your tears if you’re crying, give you advice if you need it, just overall so sweet.

also always knows when you're sad because of his intuition. isagi encourages you to open up to him, but ultimately doesn’t force you, just lets you know that he’s always there for you <3

(that's kind of lie because isagi does pry a little LOL, but he means well)

takes care of you! nags you a little, tries his best to make sure you're not doing anything stupid, and if you are, that someone responsible (him) is watching you, looks after you when you’re sick, etc.

gives you his jacket when you’re cold (he’s been waiting to do that his whole life bro LMAOO), carries your things, always texts you good morning and good night, just overall sooo good to you.

but as soft as he is for you, isagi does have this tendency to get these random spouts of confidence, so sometimes he’ll say or do something really bold out of nowhere.

like, he’ll suddenly grab your waist and pull you closer to him, or he’ll kiss you out of the blue. the flustered expression that rests on your face for a change always makes him smirk *heart eyes*

in general, though, isagi's still kind of awkward sometimes regardless and does say or do things that make you go "???" and make him be like "why did i do that" LOL he's so cute though <333

he’s pretty basic with dates, usually opts for things like restaurants, walks in the parks, movie nights, or stuff like that, but they’re still really fun!

but, if you ever want to do something out of the norm, he wouldn't be opposed to it, either. but, you do have to tell him ‘cause he's not a mind reader lol.

(okay but, one time, isagi tried to watch a scary movie with you because he wanted to do that thing where he wraps his arm around you during the scary parts, but HE ended up being scared instead 😭)

isagi’s the type to put your name with a heart emoji or the date you guys started dating in his instagram bio LOL

y/n 💓 IHS Forward #10 ⚽️ *insert some soccer quote about grinding*

it’s a bit middle school, but you let it slide because you know he just wants to show you off <3

study sessions are normal between you two but, you guys always get bored or distracted halfway through and start watching youtube or something LOL.

it’s canon he’s a thigh man lol, so if he ever sees you wearing an oversized shirt, especially one of his, with shorts, isagi will literally short circuit in real life.

he keeps his hand on your thigh when you guys cuddle that day, tracing patterns on your skin, or just squeezing it every now and then.

in general, though, isagi likes poking at and playing with them whenever they're out <3

once, isagi wanted you to do that trend on tiktok where he sits between your thighs and stuff, but he had no idea how to bring it up LOL

so, isagi just watched tiktoks of it in front of you and hoped eventually you would get the hint 🙄

and you did, thanks to his incredible lack of subtly. he doesn’t even care when you giggle and tell him how bad he is at being slick, isagi got your thighs around him, he won!!!!!!

takes a picture (or two or three) to savor the moment.

(even though he could literally just ask you to do it again in the future, but whatever, i guess)

when you’re dating isagi, the team comes with him too LOL

they’re always snapchatting you pictures of isagi when they’re hanging out without you, with stupid captions like, “look how sad your boyfriend is without you 😞”

isagi’s not even sad in the picture, he’s just confused as to why they’re shoving a camera in his face 😭

isagi one hundred percent attempts to get you to run the mile with him during gym if you don’t already.

“babe, just try!” isagi pants, as he catches up to you and your friends, as you guys are still on your second lap.

admittedly, the effort is cute, but beloved, i hate to break it to you- i will not be doing anything of the sort.

he will sit down or walk around with you after you finish the mile, though. if he’s not already playing soccer lollll.

when he does choose to go with you, expect exclamations from the team about how isagi “abandoned us for his little relationship” 👎

isagi’s receiving love language is words of affirmation (also basically canon LOL) so, he really values the compliments you give him with his whole heart.

you could tell him how his hair looks nice in the morning, and isagi will think about it all day.

whether it be about how cute he is, or how talented of a player he is, isagi really is happiest when you praise him <3

speaking of soccer, isagi has this tendency to get lost in the moment and talk your head off about some soccer related tangent that probably makes no sense to you.

his eyes light up and his voice is just oozing with passion for what he does as he goes into detail about how he made this crazy goal at practice while you stare at him with the biggest heart eyes ever, adoring his dedication.

and of course when isagi realizes he was rambling, he apologizes profusely for “boring” you, like the gentleman he is.

but when you reassure him that he could never bore you and that you want nothing more than for him to go on, isagi begins to feels lightheaded due to his adoration for you <3

if you're the type to go all out when it supporting isagi at soccer- like make one of those corny signs, yell from the crowd, wear his spare jersey to games, isagi will physically have to withhold his heart from jumping out his chest.

he's a little embarrassed that you're doing all that for him, but the effort means soooo much to him.

and speaking of soccer, it would mean a lot to isagi if you not only supported him at games and stuff, but expressed an interest in learning more about soccer as a whole, too.

you know, learn a little more about the game on your own accord, ask him to teach you how to properly play, or even challenge him to a one on one, do stuff like that, and he’ll literally be head over heels for you. well, more than he already is.

(he always goes easy on you on your guys 1v1's and he thinks your efforts are adorable, no matter how much you may or may not suck)

he'd repay the effort and try to get interested in whatever your hobbies are!

also, you can get him to do almost anything if you pout and beg hard enough, you’re literally so hard to say no to in isagi’s eyes <3

isagi’s the type to not realize when other people are flirting with him LOL

he just thinks they’re being nice (unless they’re being straight up) and i don’t think he would really process it because he’s so focused on you romantically, if that makes sense.

once he realizes you’re jealous, isagi apologizes earnestly, reassuring you over and over again that you're everything he could ask for and that he would never intentionally try to hurt you and all that jazz.

although, i will admit, sometimes isagi’s kinda smug when you're jealous, especially when it’s over a dumb reason 👎

however, when he’s jealous i feel like it could go one of two ways-

on normal days, isagi would just stand there to “intimidate” the other person, maybe cough a little for emphasis until they go away lol.

but on days where he’s already mad/filled with adrenaline/or someone’s really not taking a hint and you’re visibly uncomfortable- oh boy, it’s like a switch flips in him.

has those same fiery eyes he has during the climax of a game. the energy he’s exuding is dead serious, and that alone is enough for the person bothering you to go away. not bad for a man that’s only 5’8 🥰

adding on, isagi doesn’t take any shit about you, ever. even if it’s from his friends. usually isagi’s very neutral and doesn’t actively try to start conflict, but there are some things he’ll always defend and you’re one of them.

isagi always listens/watches/reads/etc whatever you recommend him (on that note, please recommend him good anime because isagi’s out here willingly telling people his favorite anime is darling in the franxx), even if he doesn’t necessarily like it LOL

you could show isagi objectively, the worst song ever and he would be like “yeah, it was good babe!” (it was not)

also does the same thing when you bring him shopping with you, like he's absolutely NO HELP 😭

you could try on the ugliest sweater known to man and he’d like “you look nice 🙂” pls be honest isagi, you can say it’s hideous!!!!!!

but isagi’s also being somewhat truthful in his statement because he does genuinely think you look nice in everything <3

also loves when you wear his clothes- always feels a mixture between pride and slight shyness?

kinda lol idk but overall, isagi really is sooo happy you wanna show him off that much, especially when you're wearing something of his around his friends :')

he says “i love you” first, no doubt.

he’s a bit nervous when he does because he doesn’t know if you’ll reciprocate, but he really does love you and he feels like he physically can’t hold it in anymore.

“i promise you don’t have to say it back!” isagi reassures anxiously. “i know it’s a really big commitment, and if it’s too early for you right now-”

“i love you, too.”

[poisonedapples]

Patton’s Home for Traumatized Kids

Chapter One: The New Kid

Story Summary: Roman has to have a completely new start. New school, new town, new home and a new family. As a kid in his first foster home, Roman isn’t prepared to trust these people and get hurt again, but he’s not the only kid in the house recovering from past issues. Regardless, their foster father Patton is ready to be the dad they’ve always needed, and traumatized kids learn to lean on each other for support.

Story Warnings: Past abuse of all types, trauma, and anxiety

Pairings: Familial LAMP

Chapter Summary: Roman moves into his new foster home. He is not having a good time.

Chapter Warnings: Anxiety, panic, implied past abuse, food, one vomiting mention, and talk of hidden cameras

Word Count: 6778

Notes: First chapter of a story I’ve wanted to make for my foster au! Thanks to Cornybird on Ao3 for beta-ing this one <3

“Logan, Virgil?” Patton called out from downstairs. “Can you come down here? I wanna talk about something with you!”

Virgil and Logan gave each other curious looks from their sitting places on the same bed. Virgil placed his phone on the nightstand beside him as Logan set his book down at the foot of the bed, both standing up to exit Virgil’s bedroom and head downstairs. At the dining room table was their foster father, Patton, smiling wide with a laptop and notepad in front of him.

“What’s up?” Virgil asked after he and Logan glanced at each other. 

Patton giggled to himself, “Sit down for a second and I’ll tell you! Nothing bad, promise. I think it’s very exciting.”

They quickly sat at the table on the other side of Patton. “So,” Patton joked, “I bet you’re wondering why I’ve gathered you all here today!”

Logan and Virgil spoke in unison. “You’re getting another foster kid.”

Patton blinked. “…How’d you guess it?”

“You’ve been really happy recently, but also very quiet about why you were so happy. You only get like this when you’re bringing another foster kid into the mix. You did the same thing when Logan came along.” Virgil said.

Logan nodded. “Virgil told me about his suspicions due to your behavior, and I agreed with him. I think we both expected you’d make the announcement soon.”

“Oh.” Patton rubbed the back of his neck awkwardly. “I didn’t think it was that easy to tell. Well, you guessed right! The new kiddo is moving in on Sunday!”

Logan leaned closer. “What’s their name?”

“His name is Roman Goldsberry. He’s fifteen, and he’s only been in the system for about five months. Though, before this, he was in kinship care with his aunt, so living here is going to be very strange for him. So just be patient with him at first, okay?”

“Yeah yeah, we will be.” Virgil smirked. “But you said he was fifteen?”

“Yup! He’ll be a sophomore in high school this year.”

“Aw, that means Logan’s still the baby in the family.”

Logan blushed. “I’m a teenager. I am not the so-called ‘baby’ of the family.”

“Sounds like something the baby of the family would say.”

“Falsehood!”

“Okay, okay, that’s enough.” Patton tried not to laugh. He knew how much Logan hated being the youngest, but it was hard to act like his reaction wasn’t funny. “Remember, Roman will be here Sunday, so be on your best behavior when he gets here. No spooking him.”

“Got it, got it.” Virgil slouched in his chair and thought. “One more question though. How fucked up is he?”

“Virgil, language.” Patton warned.

“Sorry! It’s just a question. We know you have a soft spot for the most effed up kids you can find.”

“I would have to say I’m curious as well.” Logan agreed. “It’s become a pattern.”

Patton sighed. “He’s not messed up, he’s a kid who’s struggling and needs support. If he wants to tell you two about his past, then he will.”

Virgil groaned. “Fine, fine. Can we go back upstairs now?”

Patton smiled. “Yes, you can go.”

“Great! I’m stealing your book, Logan.”

“Wait, you can’t do that!”

Virgil darted back upstairs with a maniacal laugh as Logan chased him, the sound of bickering teenagers traveling back up the stairs. Patton shook his head in amusement, still listening to the ruckus in case it got out of hand and he needed to step in, but Patton knew his kids. They may tease, but they’re not mean.

Patton continued working on his laptop once the noise quieted down again.

***

“I hate this.”

“I know you do, Roman, but I’m certain you can persevere and find happiness in this new home!” Roman’s social worker, Mr. Picani, smiled hopefully as he continued to drive him to his foster home. Roman was scooted as close to the window as he could possibly get, his legs crossed and clamped together so tight his thighs were getting sore. He didn’t trust Picani, and he sure as hell didn’t trust this new house. No matter what anyone told him.

“I already had a home! Living with my aunt was so much better than whatever could happen here.” Roman’s hands shook just thinking about it. He didn’t know anything about this new person, and the idea of being in a house full of strangers was enabling the more gruesome side of his imagination. He trusted his aunt, at least, but now he was going to a family who could be anyone.

Roman didn’t like the idea of that.

Picani frowned. “You know why your aunt couldn’t house you anymore, Roman. I know it’s not easy, but I think you’ll like this new place! It’s more up north in Foley County, and the area is nice. He also has two other foster children if that helps.”

“How old are the other kids?”

“Fourteen and sixteen, I think. You’ll get to know them more during your time there.”

Roman hummed, looking out the window and digging his nails into his shirt sleeve. He really hoped this foster dad hadn’t touched them before. Even forgetting about himself, a fourteen year old kid having to deal with abuse? Even after getting away from bad parents? He didn’t wish that on anyone.

“And if you ever feel unsafe,” Picani added, “you can always contact me, ‘kay?”

I already feel unsafe. “Okay. How much longer until we’re there?”

“About twenty more minutes. Just enough time to finish the rest of the Tangled movie soundtrack!”

Roman didn’t respond. Normally, he’d love to have a Disney soundtrack he could burst into song with, but he wasn’t feeling it today. And probably wouldn’t be feeling it for a long time.

He just wanted to feel safe. He felt safe with his aunt, but she couldn’t afford to keep him long after the trial since she gave birth to the twins. His aunt was always one of his favorite relatives, one of the few adults he genuinely trusted, now he was going to the house of some random guy named Patton, who he’d only heard of yesterday, and expected to be okay near him. Well, he wasn’t okay. And he wasn’t going to be, ever.

Roman leaned his head on the window and closed his eyes. His hands still shook a little and his chest felt weird, but fighting it now was pointless. Roman just hoped that if this guardian did try something, he’d do it quickly. The sooner Roman told on him to save himself and the other kids, the better.

Though, Roman still felt his hands tingle at the thought. The idea of “getting it over with” made him want to scream and cry. He wrapped his legs tighter together.

After a long time of trying to fight against his own anxious thoughts, Picani pulled into a driveway and stopped the car and Roman opened his eyes to take a look at where they were. He didn’t know the neighborhood, but it seemed like Picani was telling the truth when he said the neighborhood was nice. The house seemed huge, big bushes and flower patches in the front yard and a nice outside paint job. It looked like a house that a functional nuclear family would have, where the dad is a doctor and the mom stays at home with the kids.

Well, looks can be deceiving. Roman thought. Don’t get your hopes up.

“Here we are!” Picani unbuckled his seatbelt with a wide smile. “Grab your suitcases in the back, I’ll knock on the door.”

Roman nodded and got out of the car as Picani popped the trunk. He grabbed two red suitcases and a backpack, closing the car and wheeling it all up to the front door. Picani was there talking to a guy who Roman assumed must be Patton Sanders, and by taking just one look at him…Roman had never seen a person look so much like a dad.

 He was wearing khaki shorts and a light blue polo with tennis shoes and knee socks, thick-rimmed glasses sitting on his face to finish off the dorky look. Patton managed to pull it off, sure, but Roman felt a primal urge from binge-watching Queer Eye to fix that mess of an outfit. 

Before Roman could truly take in the fact that Patton’s knee socks also had kittens on them, Patton smiled wide once he saw Roman in the corner of his eye. “Hello, Roman! It’s so nice to have you, come on in you two!”

Patton stepped aside to hold out the door as Picani and Roman both walked in. Roman scraped his arm on the door frame trying to keep a reasonable distance from Patton, but neither of the adults seemed to notice how Roman was acting. Patton kept smiling away, and Roman tried to see how real that smile truly was. “So, Mr. Picani, I know I have some things to go over with you, so how would you feel if the other kiddos showed you around the house, Roman?”

…Kiddos? “That sounds fine to me.”

“Perfect!” Patton walked over to the staircase and called upstairs. “Logan, Virgil! Can you come down here please?”

Patton’s request was quickly followed by the sound of doors opening and closing. Two kids walked down the stairs; a boy in a black and purple hoodie, and another boy with thick glasses almost the same as Patton’s. They both stared at Roman curiously, and Roman wanted to sink into the floor.

Patton placed an arm over Logan and Virgil’s shoulders and Roman winced at the sight. “So, kiddos, this is Roman! And Roman, this is Logan,” Patton pointed to the kid in glasses. “And Virgil!” He pointed to the kid with the hoodie. The boys didn’t react much besides an awkward half smile directed Roman’s way. “How about you both show him around while I talk to Mr. Picani?”

Virgil shrugged. “Come upstairs, dude.”

Patton let go of both of the boys and walked off into the kitchen with Picani. Roman watched them from the living room for a moment, but he could feel two pairs of eyes staring at him from behind, so he turned around and followed the kids upstairs, bringing his luggage with him.

At the top of the stairs, a long hallway connected six doors on the second floor. Four of the doors were plain, brown doors, but two of them had very distinct personalities shown on the outside. One was covered in stars and planets, the door covered in a starry piece of wallpaper with a metal planet popping out of the background. The other was covered in caution tape saying keep out, with emo band posters poking out from under the tape. Two very different personalities.

“Your room will be this one at the very end of the hallway.” Logan opened the door to the room, turning on the light as Roman peeked inside. “You can place your luggage in here in the meantime.”

Roman nodded and walked inside to throw his luggage onto the floor. The room was very bare, with brown sheets on a twin bed and not much other furniture besides a desk and a dresser. There was a lamp on the desk and a floor lamp next to a door, and one of the opened closet doors showed that the top was covered in random boxes. Some newer-looking stuffed animals were also sitting on the bed; a soft bear and one of those squishy stuffed chickens Roman always saw in stores. It looked like an attempt at a welcoming gift, but new stuffed animals always put Roman on edge. He looked around the room, and the idea of sleeping here made Roman’s heart start to pound. He needed to check this place before he went to sleep that night.

Virgil smirked, taking Roman away from his anxious thoughts. “Damn, you’ve got suitcases? Living the fancy life I see.”

“…What?” Roman reeled.

Logan adjusted his glasses and crossed his arms. “Most foster children move their things using garbage bags. It’s rare we use actual suitcases.”

Roman looked down at his luggage. Suddenly, he felt guilty. “Oh, well…my aunt gave them to me before I moved out, so…”

Virgil shrugged. “What do you wanna see up here first?”

“We could show him our rooms. Or possibly the attic?”

“The attic is cooler.”

“What’s in the attic?” Roman asked.

“It essentially acts as a playroom.” Logan explained. “Board games and a…random assortment of items are all piled up there. It’s quite entertaining to search through, actually.”

“And it’s in the best place ever, come here.” Virgil motioned for Roman and Logan to follow him. He stopped at one of the doors, opening it and letting Roman peek over his shoulder to look inside. It looked like a normal walk-in closet, first aid and toilet paper on one side with batteries and rows of shampoo on the other. Virgil walked in with a smirk, “Now, check this shit out.”

Virgil jumped and pulled on a string dangling from the roof, unraveling a steep staircase through the closet leading up to a hole in the roof. Virgil started to climb the stairs as Logan followed suit, so Roman climbed right after them.

When Roman made it to the top, his eyes widened with wonder. Granted, it wasn’t anything too spectacular, surely not like something in Willy Wonka’s chocolate factory, but the fact that this hidden space existed made Roman feel excited. At his old house, he barely even had his own room to himself, so a place like this was paradise.

The walls were painted white with a giant window above a sitting area on the other side of the room. Shelves of items scattered the walls, and the rug on the floor was so clean Roman wondered how they even got a vacuum up here. It wasn’t anything like his old attic, stuffed with random items from over the years and covered in spiderwebs. Roman felt like he could spend most of his day here.

“We have a lot of various toys up here.” Logan said. He gestured to the boxes on one of the shelves. “Pokémon cards, a chess set, Magic the Gathering, lots of Lego sets, craft supplies, most of our toys make their way up here.”

Roman’s head perked up. “…Craft supplies?”

Logan nodded. “I believe we have paints and drawing utensils.”

Roman looked at the bottom of the shelf Logan gestured toward. There was a box of small painting canvases with paints and brushes, and though they definitely looked cheap, Roman saw them and grew excited as he took out a canvas and the paints in wonder.

“Kiddos!” A voice yelled from the staircase. Logan and Roman walked over to the stairs to look down, but Virgil stayed in his place on a beanbag near the window. Patton and Picani stood at the bottom, and Patton smiled. “Now, what are you all doing up there?”

“We’re showing him around the house.” Logan said matter-of-factly.

“You are, huh?” Patton crossed his arms. “Does he know where the bathroom is?”

Logan blinked. Virgil called out from behind both of them. “He knows where the important things are!”

Patton tried not to smile, but he lost that battle quickly. “Well, Mr. Picani is leaving right now, Roman.”

“How ‘bout you come down here and I talk to you in private for a sec?” Picani asked.

“Uh, alright!” Roman climbed down the stairs and followed Picani out of the closet, while Patton climbed up the stairs into the attic. They both stepped away to the other side of the hallway, and suddenly Picani’s face became very serious.

“Do you feel safe in this house, Roman?” He asked.

Roman clenched his fist and bit his cheek. No, he didn’t, actually. He didn’t know what Patton would do once the coast was clear from guests, and the idea of what could happen was freezing him from the inside out. The only place Roman would feel truly safe was if he was back in the hospital.

But Roman knew that wasn’t possible, and he couldn’t keep bothering Picani all the time for fears that couldn't be helped. He had to be on his own. Alone.

“I think I do. They…seem like good people.” Roman lied. He’d have to find another way to survive.

Picani smiled, not noticing Roman’s unease. He always was a great actor. “Amazing! Let me know if anything comes up, bucko, and I’ll talk to ya again soon! But until then…so long, farewell, auf wiedersehen goodnight!”

Picani walked downstairs and waved behind him, laughing at his own reference as he walked out the door. Roman watched him from the staircase until he could see the car leaving the driveway through the window, and Roman felt truly hopeless. This was a nightmare.

He stood frozen on the staircase for a while, staring through the window with a hope of Picani turning back and saving him. But no car came into the driveway, and Roman didn’t know what to do with himself anymore. What do you even do when living in a house full of strangers?

“Heya, kiddo!” Roman jumped at the voice coming from behind him, jerking his head back and pushing his back up against the wall. It was Patton, smiling wide with a concerned look in his eyes at Roman’s reaction. “I’m sorry, Roman, I didn’t mean to scare you! I just wanted to ask if you wanted me to give you the rest of the tour. I’ll show you everything you need this time!”

Patton laughed at himself, but Roman felt the need to vomit. Patton was close, way too close, and he didn’t know what to do about it. He didn’t want to be roaming around the house with him, vulnerable and nowhere to hide. He needed to be somewhere safe.

“Uh, no, I’m fine! I’ll figure it out myself!” Patton raised an eyebrow at him, but Roman didn’t care. “Where’s the bathroom?”

Patton’s voice became softer. He pointed to the left of him, down the opposite direction of Roman’s room. “It’s over there. Are you sure you’re alright? You look a little pale.”

“I’m fine!” Roman darted past Patton quickly and out of reach, rushing into the bathroom and locking it behind him. He pressed his back against the door and sat down, pressing his feet against the sink, ready to fight against the door if someone tried to open it. He wrapped his arms around himself tightly, trying to even out his scattered breathing. He knew Patton was outside of the door, he could feel it. He just needed to be somewhere safe.

Roman didn’t move from his spot on the floor, eventually curling into himself and resting his head on his knees. He was so tired, the whole day his heart had been pounding with anxiety and he was sick of it. What did it take to feel safe? Was it even possible for Roman to feel safe anymore?

He didn’t want an answer to that. He was just so tired.

 Roman closed his eyes and leaned his body against the bathroom wall, ignoring all his aches from the strange position and trying to give himself some comfort. His body was exhausted but his mind kept racing, thinking of all the things that could go wrong while living here. He tried to fight the anxious thoughts, but Roman figured it wasn’t that big of a deal. If he threw up in the toilet maybe they’d leave him alone for the day.

But Roman never got to that point. He rested on the floor and let his body shake, taking some deep breaths at times to feel less like he was suffocating. Eventually, a knock came to the bathroom door, and it took everything in Roman not to yelp.

“Are you still in there, Roman?” Roman could tell the voice was Logan, and that helped him relax a little more. He took in a big breath and tried to act normal.

“Yes, sorry. Do you need it?” He asked.

“I’m alright. I simply wanted to ask if you wanted to come downstairs and use the paints you seemed so interested in.”

Roman’s ears perked up at that. He forgot all about the paints, and it would be something that could ease his mind a little. But Roman wasn’t that dumb. He knew this was a plan to get him out of the bathroom. Though…he might not mind that much if he wasn’t alone.

“…Would you sit with me?” Roman asked. He doubted Patton would try anything so long as they weren’t alone together, and if he pleased them enough, maybe they’d leave him alone.

Logan was slow to respond. “I suppose I can if you wish for me to.”

Roman rolled his eyes at that sentence. What a nerd, he thought, standing up and slowly unlocking the door to the bathroom before opening it. He looked through the crack to check if Patton was standing behind Logan, but no one else was there. Logan stood there patiently with his hands clasped behind his back, and Roman fully exited the bathroom.

“I set the box on the dining room table. However, Patton is also there making a pizza for dinner.”

Roman froze. The same room as Patton? “… I’ll go, but you have to stay near me.”

Logan nodded. He led the way down the stairs while Roman followed, entering the dining room through the connected area in the living room. On the table was the box of painting supplies, and Roman ran toward them to start taking them out, trying to ignore the fact that he could see Patton in the corner of his eye. He grabbed a canvas and the cheap paints, as well as a plastic pallet and all the brushes. All that he needed was a cup of water, but…the sink was right next to where Patton was.

Roman drummed his fingers on the table. “…Logan, can you get me a cup of water?”

“Alright.” Logan stood up and grabbed a cup from the cupboard, filling it with water and handing it to Roman. Roman murmured a thank you, and Logan sat back down at his seat. He was grateful that Logan didn’t ask why Roman couldn’t get it himself.

“So, Roman,” Roman stiffened at the sound of Patton’s voice. “Are you an artsy kid?”

Roman gripped hard onto his paints, squirting out a lot more orange than he meant to. “I guess, yeah. I like art.”

“Do you like to paint, or are you more of a sketchy kinda guy?”

“Uh…all of it. Painting, drawing, coloring, I used to make a lot of stuffed animals too.”

“Awww, that sounds adorable!” The oven beeped and Patton put on his oven gloves and pulled out the pizza. “It’s probably best I don’t know how to make stuffed animals though. If I did, this house would be full of little stuffed puppies!”

Roman didn’t respond. He focused completely on mixing red and orange for a perfect sunset color, attempting to get a good gradient with the lack of shade variety. Once he filled in his sunset and blended it with a dark night sky, he mixed his white with a dot of gray and made darker clouds, dotting them above his rough-looking hill. He wanted to add more texture to the bottom of the canvas, maybe some trees, but he didn’t know how to make good ones without a fan brush. Maybe he could add some grass…

“Alright, the pizza is cooled down and ready!” Roman noticed Patton put a plate next to his painting, so he pushed all his supplies out of the way so he could eat. Patton set down more plates around the table as Virgil walked in. “It was a real pizza work if I do say so myself!”

Logan rolled his eyes and Virgil held back a snort, but Roman didn’t quite know how to react. He might have found the dad joke more amusing if he wasn’t so on edge.

Roman took a bite of the pizza. It wasn’t anything spectacular, just a store-bought one that you heat up in the oven and serve, but Roman didn’t realize he was so hungry until now. He had skipped lunch because his nerves about coming here were making his stomach churn, but finally having food near him was bringing back that hunger. Roman’s foot was still tapping violently under the table, but it was progress.

Everyone ate their pizza in silence. It was incredibly awkward on Roman’s end, no stories to tell as this table full of strangers kept making glances at him. Patton was the worst with it. He seemed to want to say something to Roman, continuously making eye contact with him until Roman looked away, but still not saying a word. He couldn’t take it. He hated it, but he hated this silence even more. Roman swallowed the pizza bite he was chewing and opened his mouth.

“So,” Roman started, “what do I…call you anyway?”

“Me?” Patton asked, his eyes lighting up. Why would his eyes light up at that?

“Yeah. Do I say Mr. Sanders, or…?”

“Oh, Patton works just fine! I hear Mr. Sanders way too often at work to wanna hear it at home too!”

“Oh, where- where do you work?” At least it wasn’t so quiet anymore.

“I’m a nurse practitioner for a clinic. It’s a lot of fun, just a lot of work. At least my hours aren’t as crazy as most nurses.”

“Oh that’s…cool.” Roman didn’t know how to continue off of that.

“It is! Is there anything else you wanna ask me, though? Maybe about the house, routines, anything?”

“Well…what are the rules here?” That seemed like a very safe question to have. It could save Roman a lot of trouble, and it could give him more of a read on the kind of parent Patton was.

“Oh, it’s not that much. You’re old enough to clean up after yourself, so make it a habit to pick up your own things and not put that stuff on other people. Be kind to everyone else, and the only rule I’m very strict about is no yelling. You can be loud sometimes, but no angry yelling at anybody here. The last one is to respect others’ privacy. Always knock on someone’s bedroom door before entering. But that’s really it, I think!”

How often do you break that last rule? “That seems reasonable, I suppose.”

Patton smiled. “I think you’ll do just fine here, kiddo. I know it’s hard to start over, but you won’t be alone during it!”

“…Thank you.”

“And I’m sure Virgil and Logan could help out a little bit, since they’ve been in the same situation! Right, you two?”

Virgil was halfway through trying to stick a whole piece of crust in his mouth. “…Uh huh.”

“…Virgil, chew your food.”

“Lo’an ‘old me I cou’ do it!”

“Do not drag me into this.”

Virgil hid his mouth behind his hand as he chewed for a long period of time. “You’re just avoiding your responsibility.”

Logan rolled his eyes. “Well, I’m finished, so try not to choke now.”

“Now I’m gonna choke just to spite you.”

“Please do not start a choking contest, Virge.”

Virgil groaned before swallowing the last of his crust. He followed Logan to the dishwasher and put his plate in, closing it and scurrying away back upstairs. Logan hesitated leaving the dining room, looking between Patton and Roman. Roman couldn’t tell if Patton noticed Logan’s hesitation or if it was just perfect timing, because he also got up and put his plate in the dishwasher.

“When you finish, Roman, just put your dishes away.”

“I can do that.”

Patton smiled and walked off into the living room, sitting on the couch to watch some TV show seemingly about cute puppies and kittens. Logan glanced at Roman again.

“Do you still want me to stay?” Logan asked.

Roman ate the last of his pizza and pushed his plate to the side, grabbing his painting again to put in front of him. It was the most effective thing at calming him down. “…No, I should be okay.”

Logan nodded and walked upstairs. Roman tried to fully immerse himself in his painting, focusing on every last detail and how he could make it better without over-detailing it. Roman put more green on his brush and started to dot at his hill on the bottom, trying to add little blades of textured grass. It was a long process, just enough to take the majority of his focus and calm his hands.

…Roman felt really weird here. It didn’t feel like he lived in this house, now. It felt like he was spending the day with some friends, and his aunt would come pick him up before the sun went down. But no, these new kids were his foster brothers and the adult he was terrified of was expected to act as his new dad. There was no one coming to save him, he was expected to sleep here and eat here and live here. This was supposed to be his safe space.

Roman rubbed at his eyes and shook his head. Don’t focus on that now, he thought. Focus on the painting.

So he did focus. He focused on monotonous texture additions and watching the paint dry on his canvas as he went along, letting the repetitive action calm his mind just a little bit. His calming method seemed to be working too well, actually, as the more details he added and stared at the paint, Roman realized that his constant panic today had completely exhausted him. It wasn’t even seven o’clock yet and Roman could feel his eyelids get heavier. He rubbed at his eyes again and tried to focus.

Roman yawned once. He yawned twice and rubbed his eyes as he kept adding minor details to his painting. Then, after a while, Roman scooted his painting to the side and laid his head down on the table.

***

“…Roman, wake up, please.”

Roman buried his head deeper in his arms. “Come on Roman, it’s late.”

Roman groggily lifted his head up. Patton was sitting in the chair across from him, the lights were all off except for the one light above the dining table. Roman looked around him, and noticed that it was dark outside now. Shit.

“You fell asleep, but that’s okay. It’s bedtime now, and the other two are already in bed, so how about you go get ready and sleep in your bed? I bet it’s comfier than the table.”

Roman dug his palm into his eye. “…What time is it…?”

“About 10:20. You all have bedtime at ten.”

“…But I’m fifteen?” Roman gave Patton a confused and sleepy look. He hasn’t had a bedtime since he was twelve, especially one that was so early. His mom only told him to be in bed by midnight.

Patton smiled. “I’ll let you in on a little secret. Logan is the only one who needs a bedtime, but I don’t want him to feel left out because he’s the only one asleep. So, how about you get ready for bed?”

Roman nodded and got out of his chair. The more he walked, the more he woke up, and he could tell by the time he went back upstairs that he wasn’t going to go back to sleep for a while since he could feel his heartbeat in his chest again. Patton followed him upstairs, turning off the dining room light as they went. Roman got his bathroom bag out from his smaller suitcase and a cotton shirt with sweatpants for pajamas, bringing it all with him to the bathroom. He closed the door as he brushed his teeth for the night, placing his bag in the bottom drawer after he did. He changed into his pajamas carefully, taking the towel on one of the racks to hide his lower half under as he switched pants, taking his other clothes and throwing them into a laundry basket.

When Roman stepped out of the bathroom, Patton was leaning against a wall waiting for him. He smiled at Roman, but Roman still ran past him to get as far away as he could get. Patton didn’t seem to notice, or maybe he just didn’t care. Roman shifted on his feet awkwardly before closing his door.

“Um…goodnight.” He finally said. Patton seemed satisfied with this.

“Goodnight, Roman.”

Roman finally closed the door to his bedroom, waiting until he heard the door on the other end of the hallway open and close. Almost immediately after, as if another force was controlling him, Roman started to tear the place apart.

He checked the charging ports in the walls, the lamp, under the bed’s covers and behind every piece of furniture. He stood on top of his suitcase to check the vents and took out all the drawers in the dresser. He punched the stuffed animals to see if he could feel wires, but he still couldn’t find it. He couldn’t find it.

Roman felt himself start to pant. He refused to go to bed until he found it. No matter how well hidden it was, Roman knew there was a camera in here. He couldn’t stop until he found it.

Roman grabbed the boxes at the top of the closet and tossed everything out of them, checking every spare blanket and binder before throwing them across the room when he found nothing. He took the hangers out of the closet and threw them on the floor, shining his phone light on the wall of the closet to find a hole. Nothing. Nothing, nothing, nothing.

Tears sprung into Roman’s eyes as he choked on his own breath. “Where the hell is it!?” He whispered, slamming the closet door closed and moving to check the bed. He tore the bedsheets off and checked the mattress, lifting it up as well to check the bed frame for anything that could be used to record. Nothing.

“Come on, please-” Roman took out the drawer from the bedside table. Nothing. He unscrewed the lightbulb from the lamp, almost shattering it from his tight grip. Nothing. He threw the lamp onto the bed and kicked the nightstand over. Nothing.

Roman choked out a sob as his whole body started to shake. This wasn’t fair, he spent all that time trying to get away from his dad only to end up in a place that hid cameras better than him. Roman gripped the covers he’d thrown and punched the floor next to them, the ache being an almost pleasant distraction from his own head. But his mind continued to race and his crying didn’t let up. The only thing Roman could manage to get out of his mouth was “No, no!”

Then, between Roman’s sobbing, he heard a knock at the door.

Roman froze in place. A feeling of dread spread through his chest and made his fingers go numb. For a second, Roman forgot to breathe as he remembered he forgot to lock the door.

Roman’s body was stiff, but his mind was going a mile a minute in a desperate attempt to save himself. He could hide in the closet, but since he tore everything out of there, if someone opened the door they’d immediately find him. He could hide under the bed, but without the covers to reach the floor it was easy to see he was under there. Roman choked on his own breath when he realized there was nowhere to hide-

“Roman?” The knock came back to the door, gentler than the first time. It wasn’t Patton’s voice like Roman feared, it was Virgil. Raspy and tired-sounding, but without a doubt Virgil.

“Y-yeah?” Roman squeaked out.

“Uh, can I…can I come in?”

Roman’s death grip on the covers loosened up slightly. “Yes…”

Virgil slowly turned the doorknob and opened it, slipping in through the smallest crack and closing the door slowly so it wouldn’t click. Once he was inside, Virgil’s eyes widened as he took in the sight of the destroyed room. “…Holy shit dude.”

Roman tried to dodge the situation, “What do you want?”

“I was gonna come in here and make a joke, like, ‘quiet down it sounds like a tornado is going through here’, but now I think I predicted the fucking future.” Roman put his head down as Virgil looked around in shock. “What the fuck happened?”

Roman wiped away his tears with the palm of his hands, digging into his eyes so hard he saw stars for a moment. “…There’s a camera in here.”

Virgil backed up more towards the door. “Wait, there is?” He darted his eyes around the room looking for what Roman was talking about. Roman let out a shaky breath.

“I haven’t found it yet, but I know it’s in here somewhere!” More tears went down Roman’s face as he hugged himself. Virgil seemed to realize what Roman was babbling on about. “I know Patton put a camera in here for me and I’m freaking out because I can’t find it!”

Virgil looked around at the mess again. He sighed. “I’m not good at this shit…you’re certain it’s in here?”

“Yes!”

“Hey, hey, don’t yell.” Virgil warned. “Pat and Logan are still asleep and I don’t think you’d like all that extra attention right now.”

He was right. If Logan and Patton came in here, Roman didn’t know what he’d do about it. It was the last thing he wanted, so Roman obeyed. “I just…I don’t know what to do…I can’t sleep until I find it.”

Virgil seemed to be thinking. He tugged on the neck of his pajama shirt before speaking. “How about we both make a deal?”

Roman lifted his head up to look at Virgil. “…Deal?”

“We’ll trade rooms for the night. There wouldn’t be a camera in my room if he’s trying to watch you, right?”

Roman paused. “…What if he’s watching you too?”

“I’ve lived here for two years. You think I wouldn’t have noticed a camera in my room by now?”

Roman thought about it. He did have a point, it was hard to go that long without finding the camera. Or at least, have your guardian have it slip that they’ve been watching you. And anything was better than staying in this place.

“…We can trade. Thanks.”

Virgil shrugged. “You know where my room is. Just slip in and don’t wreck all my shit.”

Roman laughed a little bit at that one. Virgil grabbed the sheets and covers off the floor and began to remake the bed as Roman grabbed his backpack and started to slowly open the door. But before he left, Roman had to say one more thing for his own piece of mind. “…Don’t touch my suitcases. I-I’ll know if you do.”

Virgil raised an eyebrow at him. “…I won’t.”

Roman opened the door and softly closed it behind him, slipping into the room next door covered in caution tape. He turned on the light and set his backpack down on the floor, looking around him at all the things that showed Virgil’s personality. Emo band posters covered the walls that were painted a dark purple, with dark wood furniture and Hot Topic decorations all over the place. Just looking at this room told him how angsty this kid was.

Roman shook it off and unzipped his backpack. He could deal with angsty decorations for the night, so long as this place could be safe from creeps. He took out his secret weapon from his backpack, something he secretly bought behind his aunt’s back with his babysitting money, the one item that made him feel secure in a home. He pulled out the security bar, locked Virgil’s door, and placed it under the door handle. Even if someone undid the lock, they wouldn’t be able to sneak inside while he was sleeping.

Roman’s heart calmed down a little for the first time in weeks. Even if it wasn’t much, he felt safe, maybe even safe enough to get some rest for once. Roman crawled into Virgil’s bed, covering himself in his very tasteful Jack Skellington covers, and tried to rest.

Roman’s hands still shook, and his head felt funny, but he eventually drifted off into a light sleep full of anxiety and nightmares.

[yslkook]

IF I GOT YOU (7)

mind of mine masterlist

summary: one month later...and things start to come to a head. you feel more at peace than you've ever felt, but as usual, what remains peaceful is always interrupted.

pairing: “badboy” jk x “shy/reserved” oc

warnings: cursing, alc, excessive use of pet names, HELLA HELLA toxic friendship and dynamics, suggestive content (hooking up and other mentions)

word count: 4066

a/n: if you want to be tagged, send an ask plz. would love to hear your thoughts

Despite a month going by from the last time you spoke to Jungkook in the park and put all of your feelings out in the open, spring air, you feel lighter than ever. Maybe most of that has to do with the simple fact that you’ve finally cut out a toxic, deadweight from your life. Regardless of what ends up happening with you and Jungkook as friends or more than that, at least you are at peace and happy with being yourself.

Besides, it’s not like you don’t ever see him. You see him when you visit the tattoo parlor (but you haven’t allowed yourself to be alone with him and he hasn’t initiated), you’ve seen him at impromptu nights out, at Yoongi’s apartment. Neither of you allow yourself to be alone with each other, since you had both agreed to wait. Even your text message thread with him is dry, though.

You miss him, hoping that a notification of his name with the bunny emoji attached to it flashes across the screen. But it doesn’t.

For all of his bravado, he feels somewhat shy around you on the few occasions that he’s seen you. Jungkook will go out of his way to avoid you, hiding (as much as he can) behind Mina and Mei.

He misses you. Jungkook misses the feel of your lips molding against his, the way you felt in his arms, but most of all he misses your shy smile and your loud laugh. He misses the way your eyes shine when you speak about something you’re passionate about.

Mina had said you were both being stupid, taking time away from each other when you both are denying the inevitable. But it made sense in your mind and his. You want to know what kind of person you were without the burden of Sora’s judgment weighing heavily in every frame of your life. You take the time you need to take to recenter yourself and feel somewhat whole again.

It doesn’t take you long to adjust to life without a former best friend. You quickly begin to notice how different you feel, how differently you approach basic things that you hadn’t really put much thought to before.

It feels so refreshing to not feel like you’re walking in some metaphorical shadow of someone who didn’t really care about you. Well, you think on some level, she did care. But along with the insignificant way she made you feel, it’s not enough to justify it. And you’re really grateful that you don’t need to anymore.

In fact, you’ve already deleted most pictures with her on your social medias. You haven’t quite been able to block her yet, but you think you’ll be ready to do that soon enough.

The ever elusive notion of time really does seem to heal nearly all forms of hurt.

“So,” Yoongi starts, sitting next to you on his new black leather couch and handing you a glass of red wine.

“Don’t start with me,” You say, poking his shoulder.

“I’m not starting anything with you,” Yoongi shrugs, but his eyes twinkle.

“Oh? That’s the voice you use when you have gossip or when you’re about to interrogate me,” You mutter, rolling your eyes with a fond smile.

“Maybe it’s a little of both,” Hobi chimes in, sitting on your other side. He leans back and drapes his legs over your lap, to which you instantly rest your hands over his legs.

“How lucky for me,” You mumble, taking a long swig of your wine. You’ll need it.

“How’s that witch doing,” Yoongi asks bluntly.

“I don’t know, I told you I cut her off and kicked her out of my house like a month ago,” You reply, “Did you forget already?”

“No, I just like hearing that you finally came to your fucking senses,” Yoongi says, “She was awful, but I’ll commend you for sticking it out for this long. Cheers, the witch is finally gone-”

“I believe the phrase is, ‘ding dong, the witch is dead’, but this will suffice,” Hobi says and yelps when you swat his shoulder.

“Don’t be rude,” You say, “But… thank you for helping me see the light. Even if it took a while. And I’m sorry it affected our friendship, too.”

“Ah, well, we’re all here now,” Hobi says, pulling you in for a side hug.

“Yeah. So cheers,” Yoongi says again, raising his glass to you both, “Cheers to you for choosing yourself. And to new beginnings.”

“You’ll make me cry,” You say honestly, offering your friends a watery smile.

“As if we’ve never seen you cry before,” Hobi scoffs. And it’s true- they are two of your oldest friends, and even if you’ve come to the realization that maybe you hadn’t been the greatest friend to them… That bond is hard to sever, and you’re grateful that they’ve always had your back.

“Drink up,” You say with a smile, “Cheers to new beginnings.”

Yoongi has always been a little sly, unassuming but always with several tricks up his sleeve. When he so desires to cause a little mischief and stir the pot a little. And Hobi is all too happy to engage.

Which is how you end up several glasses of red wine and rose deep (yes, you mixed, rookie mistake but who cares. You’re in the presence of some of your greatest friends, after all).

And then Yoongi goes in for the kill.

“How’s our Jungkookie,” He asks, without missing a beat. You choke on your wine and wince when it somehow gets lodged in your nose.

“I don’t know. Think he’s good,” You finally respond, your words sounding slurred, “Ask Hobi. They work together, if you didn’t know.”

“Oh, thanks for the information. I had no idea.”

“Happy to be of service,” You say, leaning into Hobi's side, “Ikindofmisshim.”

“What was that? Didn’t quite catch that,” Yoongi says, a self-satisfied smirk blooming on his lips. He heard you, of course he did, but you don’t seem to pick up on it.

“I said I kind of miss him,” You reply, a dreamy look in your eyes, “Do you think he misses me, too?”

Hobi chokes back a laugh but you hear it and offer him a glare. “Don’t make fun of me!”

“Nobody’s making fun of you, stupid,” Yoongi says poking your forehead, “And yeah. Your man doesn’t shut up about you. Always with those eyes around you.”

“He’s not my man,” You whine pathetically.

“Yeah, that’s a mystery to both of us,” Hobi says, “How long are you both gonna keep this up?”

“Keep what up?”

“This weird awkward dance you both do around each other. Avoiding each other when we’re all together. It’s kinda funny, like we all know you both wanna fuck so bad-”

“Shut up! That’s- that’s not- shut up!”

Yoongi and Hoseok both burst into laughter, drunken giggles loud in the living room and you can’t help but laugh with them.

Clubs were never your most favorite place to unwind, but you make an exception for tonight. For Mina and Mei, you’ll make an exception. The three of you had gotten ready together in Mei’s home, in between sips of cocktails that she had poured out. Mina had done your makeup for you, giving you the sharpest eyeliner you’ve ever seen on your eyelids as well as a bold red lipstick.

It’s not a club night if there is no red lipstick involved, after all.

Your makeup usually looks good when you apply it yourself, but Mina has a genuine eye and skill for makeup artistry. You recall her telling you that she’d always dreamed of going to beauty school but hadn’t pursued it. You had told her that it’s never too late to fulfill a dream and she had only smiled at you.

“Hey,” You say, “Is Jimin coming tonight? How’d your date last week go?”

“It was really good,” Mina says, something sweet in her voice, “He made me dinner and dessert. And then I sucked his soul from his cock an hour later and he even made me squirt. And yeah, he’s coming tonight to the club. We’ll see what happens...”

“Wow,” You nod, listening with wide eyes, “That sounds amazing. I’m really happy things are going well for you both. Including the horny stuff.”

“The horny stuff?” Mei laughs, “You’re cute.”

“Shut up,” You say, playfully shoving her shoulder, “It’s no joking matter that he made you squirt.”

“Yeah, I high fived him after,” Mina says slyly, “It was… a night. Can’t wait to have another night like that. But I’m gonna make him work for it tonight.”

“As you should,” You nod solemnly, “What about you Mei? Are we drinking until we blackout or are you playing hard to get with Seulgi?”

“Who says we can’t do both?” Comes Mei’s muffled response.

“Cheers to that,” You reply, “Are… Jimin’s roommates coming?”

“You think you’re slick, huh?” Mina snorts, “You wondering about Jungkook?”

“N-no, I haven’t seen Taehyung in a while either-”

“Tae’s coming, but Jungkook isn’t. Something about having a long week and wanting to chill at home.”

“Oh, gotcha,” You say, cheeks ablaze as you avoid her eyes. Unable to hold the slight sting of disappointment from your voice.

Mina and Mei see right through it but they say nothing, only handing you a refill of your now empty glass.

Despite the relatively steady stream of drinks in your hand (an illusion, really, you’ve been nursing the same two drinks all night), you’re almost completely sober. In fact, you’re more tired than anything else. It seems that Jungkook had the right idea to stay home tonight. You’re rather benignly jealous of his decision.

You enjoy dancing and singing with your friends, feeling the thrum and excitement of music and your close companions bursting through your veins.But environments like this overwhelm you sometimes. All of the flashing lights, sometimes smoke and all of the people… Tonight seems to be one of those nights.

“Wanna dance?” Comes a rich, velvety voice behind you to the right. It’s Taehyung, and you’d rather dance with Taehyung than anyone else in this club. With the exception being Jungkook, but he’s not here right now.

“Okay,” You nod, taking his hand when he offers it to you. Your thoughts flit to Jungkook briefly.

Taehyung is good company, always keeping you with a smile on your face and filling you up with laughter. He keeps you close with easy, gentle movements as you both belt out the words to whatever song is playing on the speakers. But Taehyung has always been observant.

“You don’t really wanna be here, huh? I’d take it personally, if I didn’t know you,” Taehyung teases.

“No, it’s not that,” You murmur, “Just have never been a big club goer, that’s all. Jungkook had the right idea in staying home.”

“Yeah,” Taehyung muses, “What are you two doing?”

He’s almost as blunt as Yoongi (who’s also in some corner of the club. Usually, he keeps you company at things like this, but conveniently, he’s nowhere to be found.).

“If I knew I was going to be interrogated in this club, I would’ve drank more,” You say dryly. Taehyung laughs at that and squeezes your shoulder.

“You both deserve to be happy. Just want you to know that.”

“Thanks, Tae,” You say, a grin spreading across your face, “I guess you’re not as sleazy as Mina says you are-”

“Me? Sleazy?” Taehyung gasps, pretending to be affronted. You roll your eyes and offer him your hand.

“Wanna dance?”

Taehyung turns you around and holds your hips tightly in his hands, dancing with you to the beat of the music. It’s nice to be held like this, even if it’s a little dirty.

You don’t notice a pair of sly eyes watching you from across the club.

By the time you excuse yourself to catch a breath and grab some water from the bar, you realize that most of your friends are off doing their own thing. It gives you a second to people watch from the second floor of the curb and lean on the railings, taking in your surroundings. Despite stifling a yawn.

You relish in the cool feel of the icy water flooding your senses, waking you up a little more. You wonder if you can convince Yoongi to take you to get fries or tacos after the night ends. At the thought of tacos, you salivate a little.

But your taco fueled fantasies are broken when a few girls try to push past you to get to the bar. You mumble a soft apology, but it goes unheard. The unmistakable sound of a voice, a voice that you’ve only recently been able to put out of your mind, breaks through the barrier and it makes your heart drop.

It’s an angry call of your name. Your stomach churns, and suddenly you’ve never wanted to learn the art of teleportation more.

Sora, in all her bitter glory, stands in front of you with a full drink in her hands. Beside her are two of her friends, looking resigned and trying to plead with her that they should go.

“Missed me so much that you followed me here, huh?” Sora sneers.

“I’m not even going to entertain that with a response. Or you for that matter,” You say tiredly, trying to step past her.

“All your friends left you. Look at you all alone,” She says and you roll your eyes with a dry laugh.

“I’d rather be alone than have anything to do with you, Sora,” You reply easily, “I’m leaving now-”

But she sidesteps you again, gripping your forearm and looking at you with so much animosity that it makes your skin crawl. Had she always looked at you like that?

“I can’t believe you just dropped me like nothing. After I gave you everything,” Sora says, as if you had said nothing at all. She’s clearly a little drunk, telltale signs of her drunkenness clear on her face. Her words are slurred and she stumbles a little on her feet. You cringe. You don’t want to have this conversation with her whether she’s sober or drunk.

“You treated me like I was nothing,” You snap, “I don’t want to discuss this with you. Now let me go.”

“Or what? There’s nobody here ‘cept you and me, babe,” She says, her lips twisting into a cruel smirk. Her friends have disappeared and warning bells start to go off in your head. She’s right, all of your friends have dispersed. But you manage to fish your phone out of your purse while she rambles to you and send a text to the groupchat, simply stating “pls help, Sora is here”.

Dread seeps into your pores. You just want to be done with her presence.

“Sora, just let me go. Nothing you say will change anything,” You say heatedly, “Fucking let go of me!”

You try to yank your arm out of her grip but her nails are sharp against your skin.

“I loved you, you know that? I fucking gave you everything, you were my best friend,” Sora hisses, “I just wanted to you be happy. To see that I’d do anything for you.”

It takes a minute for the dust to settle but you suddenly begin to understand. “You hurt me! That’s not friendship or l-love, or anything remotely close to it. Nothing you say will change that. I don’t want you around anymore. Take a hint, Sora,” Your voice is cold and deadly, nothing like what Sora is accustomed to.

“Please, let me go,” You beg softly, “Why won’t you let me go?”

Tears spring into your eyes, both from the force she’s holding you with and from how much this is exhausting you.

“What does he have that’s worth all of this?” Sora hisses.

“It doesn’t matter what he has. I like him and I enjoy spending time with him, that’s all that should matter, and I’m not explaining Jungkook to you,” You say coldly, “You lost the right to know a long time ago. If you took your head out of your ass for two seconds, you’d know that this friendship was over months ago.”

By now, both of your voices have raised in volume and pitch, attracting the attention of bystanders. This makes no sense to you, your head is starting to hurt from the implications of her words. You just want to go home. By now, Yoongi has seen your text and is trying to get to the bar to rescue you from Sora.

“He won’t give you what you need,” Sora exclaims.

“Shut up! Just fucking stop talking about him,” You shout, “I’m so fucking sick of this, just leave me the fuck alone. Your opinion doesn’t matter to me anymore, just drop it!”

You feel the need to defend him though, “He’s kind, he has a big heart a-and, you know what, I don’t need to explain myself to you. Just fucking drop it! Leave me alone!”

“You are so fucking blind! You’ve always been such an oblivious fucking bitch,” She screams at you and your blood goes cold. You’ve seen her angry, but not like this not when her eyes are blown over with rage.

Yoongi’s heart is beating in his ears as he tries to find you- this club is fucking huge, where the hell could you be? He’s already sent a text to Jungkook, telling him that you might be in trouble at the club and that nobody could find you.

“Where is he then? If he’s so kind, he must be here right?”

“What the fuck is your problem? You’ve always had a stick up your ass about him specifically- I mean you’ve always have a stick up your ass, but with him it’s like something crawled up there and died-”

“You couldn’t even cuff him? You dropped me for him and you didn’t even cuff him?”

“That’s none of your business!”

“What are you afraid of, babe?” She sneers cruelly, “Afraid he’ll find something he doesn’t like? Or are you afraid you’ll find something that you don’t like?”

Frustration and hurt boils in your belly, causing wetness to pool in your eyes. You shut your eyes tightly, willing the feeling to go away. With all of the calmness you can muster, you throw her hand off of you and rub your forearm gingerly.

Before you can say anything, her eyes narrow to slits. You don’t even have time to react before you feel a sudden wetness drench the front of your top. Remnants of her drink are splashed on your torso and you gasp, rage flaring through your veins once more. How dare she throw her drink at you? Before you can do anything though, a pair of arms circle your waist and you’re pulled into a strong chest.

You recognize the scent of his cologne immediately and the feel of his leather jacket. “Jungkook,” You mumble, looking up at him. He immediately gives you his jacket and pushes it through your arms wordlessly.

“Hi,” He murmurs, taking in your wide, nervous eyes and the trembling of your hands. He brushes a thumb over your cheek before standing in front of you and you take his hand in yours. Jungkook squeezes reassuringly.

He offers Sora a long, hard look and a shake of his head. She almost balks at his intense gaze. Almost.

“C’mon baby,” Jungkook finally says, “Let’s get out of here.”

“My knight in shining arm-” You shiver once you’re both outside the club, away from the eyes of strangers. You cut your train of thought off when he pulls you close to him, cupping your cheeks with both hands. Worry dots his eyes and he presses his forehead to yours shakily.

“Jungkook?” You say softly, “Is everything-”

He exhales, a shudder felt against your skin. He seems to be at odds with himself, an internal battle dancing in his dark eyes. But Jungkook makes up his mind and cradles your face again, the gentle pads of his thumbs brushing over your cheeks.

“I missed you,” Jungkook croaks, “Shit, I miss you so fucking much. Can I kiss you, baby? Is it okay if I kiss you?”

You nod instantly, breathing out a soft ‘yes’. Whatever this recent development means for both of you, it makes sense. You want this and you want him.

And then he kisses you as if it was meant to be, as if he’s been thinking about your lips every minute of every day- soft, balmy lips against your chapped, red lips. Jungkook swallows your gasp, somehow brushing against the parts of your heart that missed him. His kiss is sweet and desperate as his tongue traces over your teeth before dipping further into your mouth. Your knees weaken slightly, but he holds you steady with one arm around your waist and his other hand cradling your cheek.

You’re overwhelmed by him and from the events of the night. Whatever wetness had gathered in your eyes clings to your lashes before dropping down your cheeks.

“Baby,” Jungkook says softly. He gathers you in his arms, hugging you tightly. You sink into his hold on you, inhaling deeply. The faint thrum of his heart calms you slightly.

“I missed you,” You reply, voice barely above a whisper, “Fuck, I missed you a lot.”

He kisses your forehead with a small smile, the hint of his dimples making you smile, too. Jungkook looks at you as if you’re transparent, trying to study the reason for your wet lashes and the tear stains down your face. A feeling of understanding passes between you both, calming your racing heart and your nerves.

“Jungkook,” You murmur, “Take me home.”

“Yours or mine?”

“Yours,” You reply, not really wanting to be in your home just yet, “It’s only fair, since you spent the night at my place last time, right?”

“I guess I can’t argue with that,” Jungkook chuckles. He kisses you one more time before adjusting his motorcycle helmet over your head. When you wrap your arms around him, you press a kiss to the back of his neck and behind his ear.

He shivers.

Jungkook can tell you’re in your head a little bit, a little quiet and shaky. Even as you head into his bathroom to change into the clothes he’d given you, you couldn’t quite meet his eyes. When you returned from the bathroom with a bare face, you’re lost in thought, biting down on your bottom lip and chewing harshly.

He’d pulled you into his arms, applied his clear balm on your lips, and chided you for treating your lips like that.

You only smiled weakly at him and meekly asked him to hold you under his covers. He doesn’t deny you.

He’d caught the tail end of Sora’s tirade at the club, and he’d begun to understand. He thinks you had begun to understand, too.

“Hey,” Jungkook whispers into your hair, “Do you want to talk, baby?”

“I don’t know what to say,” You admit softly, pressing your hand over his.

“I can talk for both of us,” Jungkook says, kissing your temple, “Can I do that?”

“Yeah,” You mumble, threading your fingers through his and squeezing.

“I heard some of what Sora said,” Jungkook says and you tense up but he wordlessly tells you to relax, “I think in some weird, twisted, fucked up way. She loved you and her way of showing you how was keeping you to herself. It’s shitty, but it made sense to her. But you don’t owe her anything, baby. Not a damn thing.”

“Yeah,” You sigh, “I feel really gross and I don’t know why.”

“That’s alright, baby,” Jungkook says, rubbing your arm, “You didn’t know. That’s not love, not really. You’re safe here.”

“I know,” You say, turning to look at him with a small smile, “I trust you.”

You turn fully in his arms, resting your head on his chest and wrapping an arm around his waist. His heartbeat lulls you to sleep, as well as his gentle fingers over your back. It’s so easy with him, and you don’t need to think too much. Just how you like it.

Tags: @kookdbean @codeinebelle

MoM Tags: @tiemeuptogoldenchains @boymeetsparadise @jungkooksseuphoria @kaepjjangiya @drumsofheaven @ppeachyttae @tae-bebe @yiyi4657 @mygscafe @beeeetsandskzreads @maichiverse @hordanhearsawhooo @anonymous2505

[boomboombakugou]

Big 3’s Reactions to Sleeping in the Same Bed for the First Time

Pairings: Midoriya x Reader, Bakugou x Reader, Todoroki x Reader

fluff :) *swearing*

~Izuku Midoriya~

You were at a training camp for the weekend with the whole class. Everybody had their own bed, but the second you set your bag in yours, it broke. Must’ve been old.

You and Midoriya kinda had this thing where you both knew you liked eachother, but nobody ever said anything. He offered to share with you.

“Unless you don’t want to! That’s fine. Not that I- I like want you to- wait! I’m not saying I don’t want you to either! I just mean uh.. do w-whatever you want.” He stuttered ending with a smile. Everyone else laughed at him, making him even more flustered.

You accepted cooly, but you were more nervous than it came off. When night rolled around you rummaged through your bag, looking for pajamas. You only packed corny matching sets because you didn’t think this was happen.

After choosing the least embarrassing ones, you knocked on his door. He opened quicker than expected, “Hey Y/N!” He said enthusiastically, but you could hear the anxiousness in his voice.

It smelled nice. You couldn’t tell if it was the natural smell or if he sprayed something in preparation for your arrival.

He was wearing a white tank top and plaid pajama pants. You both just kinda stood there awkwardly. “I- uh.. do you wanna.. Are you tired right now?” He asked

You were, but you didn’t wanna make it awkward if he wasn’t, so you just asked him if he was. Awkwardly enough, he was thinking the same thing. He just scratched his neck and admitted he was.

You agreed and he opened up the covers for you. It was a queen, so you didn’t have to be so close. Not that you didn’t want to be.

You got under the covers and faced the wall. He got under and faced the opposite way. “Goodnight Y/N.” He said turning off the lamp.

He quickly turned it on again, “Sorry I forgot to ask! Are you like- are you afraid of the dark? I won’t make fun of you if you say yes.” You laugh to yourself and tell him it’s fine.

“Goodnight Izuku.” You responded.

~Katsuki Bakugou~

Like 2 weeks ago, Bakugou had asked you to be his girlfriend. No awkwardness. He just told you he liked you. You said you did too. And now here you are.

After failing your last test, he insisted on tutoring you because he, doesn’t want to be labeled as “someone who’s dating a dumbass.” He was definitely joking, but it motivated you.

You were both in his room, in your pajamas, while he explained the work to you.

“Y/N! Wake the hell up!” He snapped, poking your forehead. You had dozed off while studying. He tried to keep going, but you could no longer focus.

The next test was in 2 days, so you told him you would get up early and come study. “If you’re coming back anyways, just sleep in here.” He stated. Your eyes widened. You weren’t opposed to the idea, but it was just your guys first “sleepover.”

You shrug and set your stuff back in the table.

“No light, no tv. If you’re scared, don’t be.” He said as you crawled under the cover. You actually were slightly afraid of the dark, but you guess it wouldn’t be as scary with someone you know beside you.

Bakugou always went to sleep early, you pretty much just went on your phone till you fell asleep. “I thought you were tired. Why are you in your phone?” He growled.

You tried to explain, but he just snatched it away from you and tucked in under his pillow. “Sleep.” He affirmed. You rolled your eyes, but shut them.

You were awoken by a warm hand shaking your shoulder. Bakugou is staring you dead in the face when you turn around.

“Oh it’s morning.. already?” You murmur. He looks annoyed as he clicks his phone. You hear the sound of a very loud snorer.

“I can’t sleep with your fucking snores echoing the room.” He said angrily, but you knew he wasn’t trying to be hurtful. You rubbed your eyes and told him you would just go back to your room.

“No.” He protested. You lifted the covers and told him it’d be better. He snatched you back and wrapped the blanket back around you. “No. I’ll live. Just thought it was funny. Go back to sleep.” He whispered.

You shut your eyes. Suddenly you hear a soft snoring. Well how the turn tables. You remember your phone is under his pillow, but he’ll wake up if you get it, so you just note the memory in your mind.

~Shoto Todoroki~

You had told Shoto that you were having nightmares. He insisted that they weren’t really nightmares, instead just dreams you didn’t like.

Regardless, he acknowledged that they made you uncomfortable. “Do you wanna sleep in my room?” He asked, in response. He didn’t know how to comfort you, but he was trying.

You agreed and bought your one stuffed animal into his room at night.

“What’s that?” He asked. You stared at him confused. “A stuffed animal that my mom gave me when I was like 7. I can’t sleep without it.”

He smiled a little bit, “I wish my mom made gave me plushies instead of scars.” Well that was awkward. You stood there in silence for a while. You know he doesn’t mean to make things uncomfortable, he’s just blunt.

He asked you if you wanted the right or left because he was more comfortable on the left, but he’d let you sleep there if you wanted.

You didn’t have a particular preference, so you laid on the right.

He wrapped him arm around you and scooter in close, not saying a word. “Goodnight sho.” Yiu said breaking the silence.

He responded, but not to what you said, “Is this too close? I just thought this would make your dreams less scary.” You laugh and say it’s fine. It does make you feel safe.

“Goodnight Y/N. Goodnight stuffed animal.. what a gruesome title for a children’s item .” He ended.

(A/N: okay my second post :D i still don’t know how requests work, but I want some because I’m terrible at thinking of scenarios.)