#(been craving wendys since last night)

[mugenloopdalove]

for juneteeth someone should send me burger money

[donistheone]

The Scale

Summary: Eric, a recent college grad with a healthy appetite, is desperately trying to keep himself underneath the threshold of “obesity”. As he religiously keeps track of his weight and works out, he still craves junk food and his clothes are no longer fitting properly. Something isn’t adding up…

Eric threw himself down onto his old leather couch and turned on the TV, sighing with relief after his long day. He had started the day at his doctor’s office for his annual check-up, which hadn’t gone well. He knew that sitting in his office snacking had caught up with his waistline, and he no longer had the muscular and fit body he’d been so proud of in college. 

It had been a year since Eric graduated with his degree in business, and he had recently replaced all of his 32’ pants with 34s. What he hadn’t realized was that over the past year, he had packed quite a lot of weight onto his 6’1” frame. Eric was devastated that morning to hear the doctor tell him he weighed 220 pounds, 30 pounds heavier than he had been only a year ago. The doctor had been direct with Eric, smiling as he told him that he had gained too much weight too quickly, and that with a BMI of 29.0, he was tantalizingly close to a BMI of 30.0, or obesity. The doctor had happily informed Eric that he needed to take action to lose weight or else, at the rapid rate he was growing, he would cross this terrifying threshold very soon.

Sitting on his couch, Eric looked down at his belly, which peeked out in the gaps between the buttons of his strained size L shirt. His stomach growled, and Eric frowned. “Shut up!” he muttered to himself crossly. He needed to lose weight, and he wasn’t allowing himself to be hungry. After his appointment, he had skipped his usual breakfast order of 2 egg McMuffins from McDonalds, and he went into work with a determination to not snack at all. He ordered a salad for lunch, and had worked out for the first time in a year after his shift had finished. On the way home, he bought healthy ingredients and a scale to keep track of his weight. He wasn’t going to allow himself to cross the threshold to obesity, no matter what.

Eric had watched 2 episodes of his favorite show when he decided he had to eat something. After all, he was used to constant snacking, and he had barely eaten all day. He paused his show and walked over to the kitchen and threw together a low calorie salad with cucumber, lettuce, and tomato. “I feel like a fucking rabbit” he thought to himself as he nibbled a piece of lettuce. “Do normal people eat like this??”. 

Having not satiated his hunger at all, Eric miserably rose up from the couch and walked to the bathroom. He timidly stepped on his new scale, praying that all of the suffering he had endured throughout the day had at least been worth it. The scale displayed 219 in glowing red letters. “I’ve already lost a pound!” Eric shouted, pleased with himself. Just then, his stomach once again growled in protest. It seemed to have a mind of its own, and Eric could no longer tolerate the hunger pains. He remembered he had leftover pizza from last night, and while it wasn’t the healthiest option, he couldn’t stand the idea of eating more vegetables. He walked over to the fridge and opened the door, but then realized with dismay that he had finished the entire Domino’s XL pizza last night. Ravenous and desperate, Eric opened the DoorDash app on his phone and ordered his usual double cheeseburger meal from Wendy’s. 

Half an hour later surrounded by burger wrappers and an empty 64oz soda cup, Eric’s urgent hunger had been satiated, but he had made a terrible mistake. Panicking, Eric got up and looked at himself in the mirror, burger grease dribbling down his chin. His chest was puffy, and his gut was distended, jutting out far in front of him. He quickly stepped on his new scale, and sighed with annoyance when it read 221. Some quick googling informed him that his BMI was still under 30.0.  “Maybe I gained a couple of pounds back already, but at least I’m still technically not obese” he told himself. 

Eric woke up the next morning and immediately made his way to the bathroom and stepped on his scale. 220. “Ha! Looks like sleeping is a great way to lose weight!” He smirked at himself in the mirror and raised his arm into a muscle pump, ignoring the slight drooping of flab that had been solid muscle less than a year ago. “We’re going to really start losing weight today!” His 34” inch jeans obscenely clinging to his ass, he walked to his car, got in, and turned on the engine. 

At work, Eric decided that to avoid a repeat of the manic frenzy of eating that had happened last night, he would allow himself to have a few of his usual snacks to tame his hunger. He opened his desk drawer and pulled out a few Twinkies and a family size bag of Doritos, munching slowly while he filled out his reports. He stopped by the gym on the way home, taking no notice of how his belly slightly eased its way out from underneath his tight gym clothes as he lifted weights. 

After his exhausting workout, Eric flopped onto his couch and picked at a salad. Putting the mostly uneaten meal aside, he weighed himself in the bathroom. 222. “How is this possible!” He yelped. He had been trying so hard to lose weight and avoid obesity, but it was so challenging! He didn’t even understand how he had gained weight over the course of the day, since he had only had a few snacks, and he had even done a thorough weight lifting routine! Defeated, he got onto his computer and calculated that he would be considered obese at a weight of 228 pounds. Six measly pounds lay between him and obesity. He sat in front of his computer for a moment, miserable and deep in thought. He gently rubbed his grumbling belly, his hairy paunch briefly visible. He then abruptly ordered an XL Domino’s pizza on his phone. He couldn’t stand being hungry, and a little treat wouldn’t affect his weight too much. As long as he weighed less than 228 pounds, he told himself, then he couldn’t be officially obese. 

After the pizza, Eric had demolished a half gallon of cookie dough ice cream in a particularly gluttonous moment, and then followed it with a dozen donuts. He had gone to sleep happy and absolutely stuffed to the brim. That morning, he had woken up, taken in the evidence of the previous night scattered across the floor, and cursed himself for allowing such a feeding frenzy to happen yet again. He had then reluctantly weighed himself, expecting the worst. 

222 was the number that flashed up on the scale. “Holy hell!” he thought merrily. “I was sure that I would have gained at least a couple of pounds after what happened last night!” The scale revealed that he hadn’t gained a single pound. It was a miracle! Joyous, he went into his closet and picked out a large pink polo shirt and his new favorite 34” brown chino pants. He was so thrilled to not have gained any weight that he didn’t notice how his thick thighs rubbed together viciously, straining against the seams of his pants. He didn’t notice how his belly peeked out of his polo shirt ever so slightly, or the new small layer of fat beginning to form underneath his chin. 

---

Eric walked into work two weeks later feeling ecstatic. The scale still read 222 pounds, even though he had completely abandoned his new diet of salad two weeks ago. Clearly, his workouts lifting weights at the gym were enough to balance out the calories of his extravagant evening meals. He binged on his favorite foods every night, but the scale continued to not change. He did have to buy a few new XL shirts and some 36” chinos, but when you build so much muscle, of course you might need to go up a size or two! He had found a way to conquer the looming threshold of obesity. He slowly lowered himself into his seat, not noticing the way his ass filled up his chair more than it used to. “Why would anyone want to eat salad when they could avoid obesity by eating anything they want?” he thought to himself smugly as he scarfed down another family size bag of Doritos. He leaned over to his phone and ordered a burger from Wendy’s for lunch. He was hungry, and he didn’t want to starve, after all!

---

About a year later, Eric lumbered into the doctor’s office for his annual check-up. His 44” jeans slipped down his wide legs and he quickly yanked them back up, the action making his entire body jiggle. His belly flopped out of the bottom of his new 3XL shirt. He had continued to eat whatever he wanted and lifted weights every day. Sure, he was lifting less than he had a few months ago and he wasn’t doing as many reps as he used to, but at least he still hadn’t become obese! After a few months of his new weight maintenance routine, his scale still reported a weight of 222 pounds, and he eventually stopped weighing himself since the weight never changed. 

The doctor looked up, and gaped in shock. “Eric?!” he cried. “Is that you?”. Eric looked at the doctor and frowned. “Yes, of course it’s me!” he replied. The doctor stared at Eric for a moment, looked at his medical report, blinked, and then shook his head. “Get on the scale,” he ordered. Eric proudly stepped on the scale, his hairy belly grazing the wall, and smiled at the doctor. “I’ve been on a diet and working out over the last year. I haven’t lost any weight, exactly, but I think you’ll be pleased nevertheless!”. The doctor laughed and grabbed Eric’s protruding belly. “Pleased? Remember last time you were here, I informed you that you were nearing obesity and you needed to get in shape? Well, it seems like you certainly have been busy since our last meeting.” The doctor smirked and pointed at the reading on the scale.

340

“A BMI of 44.9!” the doctor bellowed. Eric turned towards the doctor, belly and tits wobbling, and mouth agape in surprise. “But….but…. “ The doctor smacked Eric’s ass. “Yes, that’s a big butt alright!” he cackled. Eric’s cheeks burned red as he realized he had gained a whopping 120 pounds over the last year. All of those binges had made him gain so much weight! And he had foolishly thought that he hadn’t gained any weight at all… 

“But the scale said I still weighed 222 pounds!” he blurted out. The doctor looked at him and sighed. “Did you remember to change the batteries, fatty?”

The End

[thisautistic]

9 Fandom Peeps to Get to Know Better:

I was tagged by @mikuni14 *waves*

3 Ships You Like: um.

obviously #1 is VegasPete my ult

#2 my first thai bl ship Fighter/Tutor

and a more recent one

#3 PhayaTharn

First Ship Ever: hmmmm. that's hard to remember but probablyyyyy Peter Pan/Wendy in the 2003 version of Peter Pan

Last Song You Heard:

Favorite Childhood Book: it's been so long since i was a kid.. probably wolf tower by tanith lee tho

Currently Reading:nothing. lol. it's been so long since i've been a consistent reader

Currently watching: Deep Night the series, gonna start 1000 years old and 23.5 today!

Currently consuming: Deep Night. And Broken Melodies by NCT Dream because i really like it since spotify recced it to me. if this means food then like. i'm drinking water lolol

Currently craving: adventure!

lemme tag @29daffodils @tbhimnoteasyonmyself @magicaldreamfox1 @bengiyo @alienwlw @iwantoceans @loveable-sea-lemon @vegaseatsass @itsanidiom

[trangenderstan]

Trangenderstan ramble series

I am feeling very extremely sentimental this evening so here we heckin go (shoutout to tumblr user unearlthyfromage whom i am too scared to tag)

I love Stanley’s character development. It’s so amazing in so many ways and nearly perfectly executed. Today i’m crying about one thing and one thing only

THE WAY ALL OF THIS IS SO SO LIFE-CHANGING FOR HIM

“Oh but Arsen of course its life-changing that’s what the show is about” HEAR ME OUTT!!!!

Ever since Stanley was a child he was hurt. Badly. By other people. A huge part of his character is the way he easily slips into a persona. We see it multiple times in the way he talks about himself (By day i was Stanford Pines, Mister Mystery! But by night, i was down in the basement trying to bring the real Stanford back) and just in the general visual language of his character.

And i think a huge part of that persona is just how badly insecure he is. You cannot hate this man more than he already hates himself. But the thing about that is, there’s only so many personal blows you can take in your life, even if you’ve already given up on how you view yourself. It’s been repeatedly stated that Stan is craving positive attention, but he’s just too bad at actually getting people to like him. So he creates this persona that simultaneously shields him and uplifts him. If he is praised, it’s “Oh well i did that! Hell yeah!”. If he’s berated, hated, scolded, cursed, then it’s “Oh who cares, it’s not the real me anyway suckers!”

That persona is such a huge part of his character and is so deeply-rooted he even uses it on Ford a couple times in his teens (namely the swingset scene. Look at how Stanley is smiling throughout, but then falters the moment Ford leaves), it’s only natural that he’d use it around people who genuinely want to help him. Soos, Wendy, Dipper, Mabel - all of them are still faced with that fake side of him all throughout season 1

(i have some beef with The Legend of the Gobblewonker here but all writers make mistakes and no show is perfect)

He cares about them deeply, he spends time with them, but he never gets personal. He never really lets himself slip and just enjoy everyone’s presence. Every minute spent in the room with so many people is every minute he has to have that persona up and shielding him from any sudden criticism his way

BUT THEN THE ENDING. AND THE ENTIRETY OF SEASON 2. GOD FUCKING DAMN IT.

I don’t know how many people noticed how goddamn important this scene is to show his character development. Sure he’s still closed-off and gruff and denies he’s going to miss them, but the bets are off. He isn’t hiding his true feelings at all. He’s crying and while that happened some times in the show, it’s never been shown properly. With drawn tears and everything MAN

Hes just so totally changed by all these people that come into his life. People that finally get through to him with all their collective effort. And i imagine helping him regain his memories did the last of it

All i want is for this guy to get infinite hugs and love and affection and let him do his silly little crimes and then bail him out of jail with a noogie and a “silly knucklehead” god fucking damn it IS THAT TOO MUCH TO ASK

[celepom]

More Great Reads for Pride!

Beetle and the Hollow Bones by Aliza Layne

In the eerie town of ‘Allows, some people get to be magical sorceresses, while other people have their spirits trapped in the mall for all ghastly eternity. Then there’s twelve-year-old goblin-witch Beetle, who’s caught in between. She’d rather skip being homeschooled completely and spend time with her best friend, Blob Glost. But the mall is getting boring, and B.G. is cursed to haunt it, tethered there by some unseen force. And now Beetle’s old best friend, Kat, is back in town for a sorcery apprenticeship with her Aunt Hollowbone. Kat is everything Beetle wants to be: beautiful, cool, great at magic, and kind of famous online. Beetle’s quickly being left in the dust. But Kat’s mentor has set her own vile scheme in motion. If Blob Ghost doesn’t escape the mall soon, their afterlife might be coming to a very sticky end. Now, Beetle has less than a week to rescue her best ghost, encourage Kat to stand up for herself, and confront the magic she’s been avoiding for far too long. And hopefully ride a broom without crashing.

Mooncakes by Wendy Xu

A story of love and demons, family and witchcraft. Nova Huang knows more about magic than your average teen witch. She works at her grandmothers’ bookshop, where she helps them loan out spell books and investigate any supernatural occurrences in their New England town. One fateful night, she follows reports of a white wolf into the woods, and she comes across the unexpected: her childhood crush, Tam Lang, battling a horse demon in the woods. As a werewolf, Tam has been wandering from place to place for years, unable to call any townhome. Pursued by dark forces eager to claim the magic of wolves and out of options, Tam turns to Nova for help. Their latent feelings are rekindled against the backdrop of witchcraft, untested magic, occult rituals, and family ties both new and old in this enchanting tale of self-discovery.

Laura Dean Keeps Breaking Up With Me by Mariko Tamaki

All Freddy Riley wants is for Laura Dean to stop breaking up with her. The day they got back together was the best one of Freddy’s life, but nothing’s made sense since. Laura Dean is popular, funny and SO CUTE … but she can be really thoughtless, even mean. Their on-again, off-again relationship has Freddy’s head spinning — and Freddy’s friends can’t understand why she keeps going back.

When Freddy consults the services of a local mystic, the mysterious Seek-Her, she isn’t thrilled with the advice she receives. But something’s got to give: Freddy’s heart is breaking in slow motion, and she may be about to lose her very best friend as well as her last shred of self-respect. Fortunately for Freddy, there are new friends, and the insight of advice columnist Anna Vice, to help her through being a teenager in love.

Mariko Tamaki and Rosemary Valero-O’Connell bring to life a sweet and spirited tale of young love that asks us to consider what happens when we ditch the toxic relationships we crave to embrace the healthy ones we need.

The Bride Was a Boy by Chii

A heartwarming transgender love story, based on true events!  A diary comic with an upbeat, adorable flair that tells the charming tale of Chii, a woman assigned male at birth. Her story starts with her childhood and follows the ups and downs of exploring her sexuality, gender, and transition–as well as falling in love with a man who’s head over heels for her. Now, Chii is about to embark on a new adventure: becoming a bride!

Nimona by N. Stevenson

Nimona is an impulsive young shapeshifter with a knack for villainy. Lord Ballister Blackheart is a villain with a vendetta. As sidekick and supervillain, Nimona and Lord Blackheart are about to wreak some serious havoc. Their mission: prove to the kingdom that Sir Ambrosius Goldenloin and his buddies at the Institution of Law Enforcement and Heroics aren't the heroes everyone thinks they are.

But as small acts of mischief escalate into a vicious battle, Lord Blackheart realizes that Nimona's powers are as murky and mysterious as her past. And her unpredictable wild side might be more dangerous than he is willing to admit.

Space Battle Lunchtime by Natalie Riess

Earth baker Peony gets the deal of a lifetime when she agrees to be a contestant on the Universe's hottest reality TV show, Space Battle Lunchtime! But that was before she knew that it shoots on location... on a spaceship... and her alien competitors don't play nice! Does Peony really have what it takes to be the best cook in the Galaxy? Tune in and find out!

I Hear the Sunspot by Yuki Fumino

Because of a hearing disability, Kohei is often misunderstood and has trouble integrating into life on campus, so he learns to keep his distance. That is until he meets the outspoken and cheerful Taichi. He tells Kohei that his hearing loss is not his fault. Taichi's words cut through Kohei's usual defense mechanisms and open his heart. More than friends, less than lovers, their relationship changes Kohei forever.

Secret XXX by Meguru Hinohara

Shohei loves bunnies! He loves them so much he’s even taken to volunteering at a local pet shop. Store owner Mito is as sweet and kind as the fuzzy critters he cares for, and it’s not long before Shohei finds himself wanting to cuddle with him as much as the bunnies! But Shohei is hiding a dangerous secret, one that makes this dream an unlikely reality.

Thirsty Mermaids by Kat Leyh

Fresh out of shipwreck wine, three tipsy mermaids decide to magically masquerade as humans and sneak onto land to indulge in much more drinking and a whole lot of fun in the heart of a local seaside tourist trap. But the good times abruptly end the next morning as, through the haze of killer hangovers, the trio realizes they never actually learned how to break the spell, and are now stuck on land for the foreseeable future. Which means everything from: enlisting the aid of their I-know-we-just-met-can-we-crash-with-you bartender friend, struggling to make sense of the world around them, and even trying to get a job with no skill set…all while attempting to somehow return to the sea and making the most of their current situation with tenacity and camaraderie (especially if someone else is buying).

Jem and the Holograms by Kelly Thompson & Sophie Campbell

Meet Jerrica Benton—a girl with a secret. She and her sister Kimber team with two friends to become... JEM AND THE HOLOGRAMS! But what does it mean to be JEM today? Fashion, art, action, and style collide in Jem and the Holograms: Showtime!

[ssavanessa22]

A Bundle of surprises

A/n: it's not Monday, but who gives a fuck right now 🤷🏾‍♀️Also, as I rewrote half the show cause I can do whatever I want 😗 thank you for @samuel-de-champagne-problems de-champagne-problems de-champagne-problems, for helping with this fic and @sweetandsunny for helping me and getting me out of my writer's block! Again reblogs and comments are what help me write more :)

Masterlist

Warnings: pregnant fem! Reader

Parings: Spencer x reader romantic, Aaron x reader platonic

She had been tossing and turning the whole night; she never sleeps well without spencer next to her, lightly tracing the curvature of her back with his hands or gently tracing the stretch marks that delicately wrapped around my bump and thighs like petals in the wind. She had had ups and downs; the cravings at 2 am for McDonald's fries with KFC chicken and subway meatballs. The crankness towards the whole team even causing her to have a meltdown in the middle of the bullpen, but it was all going to be worth it. She was two weeks shy of giving birth, nearly done growing the baby she and Spencer had been waiting for.

Even though the bau had had its fair share of agents come and go through those glass doors since she and spencer first started. She's tried her hardest to keep in contact with as many people as she possibly could. Meeting kate’s baby after she had given birth and always making sure Meghan needed anyone to talk to after the whole ordeal, sending emails back and forth to sever and Todd. Finding Alex after she left and sternly telling her that she didn't get to be another person who left Spencer without an explanation making sure both brainiac‘s spent as much time together as their schedules allowed. Even going as far as turning up at Derek’s house at 1 am and forcing him to help her follow Gideon down the east coast and ultimately save his life. However, the person she stayed in contact with the most throughout the years was Aaron; after the whole experience with Scratch, Aaron and Jack came back from witness protection. However, Aaron didn’t want to be unit chief anymore. It was hard for her to see Spencer lose another person in his life; nonetheless, she understood why Aaron made that decision.

After he left, no one on the team had seen him or even spoken to him except Rossi a few times, and it deeply upset her; how can someone she considered a father leave her life. She knew Spence had lost his fair share of people in his life, but she also lost people she considered family, and not having that father figure around hurt her. So when she was 2 months pregnant and violently throwing up, home alone because she forced Spencer to go to work she did what any rational person would do. She stomped all the way the Cruz’s office cried her eyes out and begged him for Aarons new address and the address of jacks high school. She had already tried all his phone numbers and went to his old apartment before and he's wasn't there so this was her last chance. And again as any pregnant woman would do with raging hormones coursing through her...she kidnapped Jack from school.

Aaron was pacing his living room, already getting ready to call Cruz to order the Marshalls, CARD anyone. Jack hadn't been answering his messages or calls anything, and he's was worried sick the flashbacks to Haley and a young jack invaded his mind. This couldn't be happening again. His thoughts were interrupted when he heard jacks special knock on the door and ran as fast as possible to answer it. “Hey, dad”

“Jesus Christ jack you scared the crap out of me where we're you” he said after breathing out in relief

“I was with a friend she took me to Wendy's and we had burgers”

“Jack who's your friend, you need to tell me if you going to go out”

Jack step to the side of the door. Aaron could see who was with him

“Aaron, if you hadn't been ignoring my calls, I wouldn't have had to kidnap jack.”

“Y/n your kidding me why the fu-”

“look, I'm sorry, but for the last 13 years, I've seen people leave Spencer with just a note or a book; I needed you, and you just left, and now I'm pregnant and my mums been great and all, but I just needed a dad, and you left” by this point, you were full-on sobbing on Aaron's doorstep tears bubbling up in your face and ruining your makeup causing Aarons face softened.

“Y/n, I'm so sorry. I just felt terrible for leaving, and I knew you would beg me to stay, and I couldn't do that.”

“I wouldn't have forced you. I love you and Jack too much to make you stay. I would have told you to go.”

“I’m so sorry; I'm so sorry.”

“It's okay. I just missed you so much; please don't leave again.”

And that's how you became the only person that Aaron was in contact with; at the BAU, he had sworn you to Secrecy and said that it would be too much for him right now to be talking to the whole team regardless, The secret was killing you.

Waddling your way into The BAU, she was greeted by the whole team at their desks.

“If it isn't, mama Reid, how are you doing, honey” Penelope Squealed once she saw you

“I'm doing well, sweetheart, cause you are all so sweet and cute, and I needed to get out of the house. I made some sweet treats for you all. Cinnamon buns and some cupcakes”

“Well, isn't that a nice surprise? I will be taking many”, luke replied

“Take as many as your heart desires luke, oh and Matt, I have some extra for the kids and your hottie at home.”

“Thanks n/n the kids are gonna love these”, he mumbled whilst take a big bite out of a cupcake “and stop calling my wife a hottie”, he quipped back

“I am not making any promises, matt”, you replied whilst giggling “now, where is my baby daddy.”

Just as y/n asked the team where spencer was, he came out of the break room with Tara

“I mean, scientists haven't done a study on it, but I see I can't see why they couldn't test whether different positions in sexual intercourse make more babies who don't fit societies eurocentric standard of beauty. It all depends on- baby, what are doing here!”

Jogging up to you and kissing your belly and your Cheek

“Just here to deliver some sweet treats to you cause you guys work so hard, and you deserve it.”

“Well, thank you for that, baby. It means a lot”, spencer replied before slapping a sweet and long kiss on your lips

You weren't prepared for Spence to kiss you that passionately. Your face was burning hot, and everyone could see you visibly getting flustered

“You alright there, mama? You look all hot and flustered”, Penelope asked

“Yeah, I'm good just haven't been kissed like that in a while, is all; it made me feel all hot and flustered.”

“Oh, we can tell, love. I think your water just broke from that kiss”, Emily interrupted quickly

Looking down as best as you could with your large bump in the way, you saw a small patch of liquid on the floor right beneath you

“Holy shit, this can be happening right now, not in this filthy office filled with antibodies and people and dirt and an array of microbes, and God y/n their early the baby is early your only 38 weeks we've still got some time this can't be happening.”

“Oh my goodness, baby genius is coming. I repeat baby genius is coming!”

You started stroking Spencer's arm, trying to calm him down by using the breathing exercises you two practised in preparation for the reaction he would have when your water broke

“Spencer; honey, it's fine. Everything is going to be okay. My hospital bags are in the car. Let's all breathe, including you, penny.”

After calming both spencer and Garcia from the edge of a panic attack, you and spencer made it down to the car with Matt as you made the executive decision that Reid was in no state to drive.

“Spencer, everything's going to be OK; you need to breathe in and out, baby in and out”

“Okay, okay, I'm trying. I'm trying really hard”

“You know the way your coaching spencer to breathe. You would think he's the one having the baby, not you,” Matt said from the driver's seat

“Funny joke Matt but right now is not the time.”

“Okay, I'm good now. Everything is fine with me Garcia called your mum on our way down here. Your sister is on the way. Is there anyone I forget to tell?”

Crap, you forgot about this problem; you said you would cross that bridge when you got there, and now you are here. You want Aaron there. You need him there; you can't call your dad and ask for his support like all your other pregnant friends, and he's the closest thing you've had to a father in years. But if you call him, everyone will know you were in contact with him; spencer will know, and God knows who he will take that. He was distraught when Aaron had to leave, and him knowing you've been close with Aaron this whole time might just break him. But the contractions are starting to hit you now, so you can decide that later.

“Nope, no one else that's everyone”

You were at hour 10 at this point tired, and in so much pain the ice chips spencer was giving you weren't helping anymore, and the braids in your hair were too long, and we're frustrating her

“It's been hours, and I can't do this anyone mum please I'm so tired I can't- I'm sick of this I want this over with I want this baby out now, I'm hungry and sad and angry and happy all rolled up into one big ball please make it stop mum.”

“Honey your you're doing so well right now; okay, I'm so proud of you, baby, but maybe if your feeling like this, we should call him”

“Call who? I thought we told everyone we needed to tell”

“Mum why this was no the right time to tell me this not now not when I'm pushing a baby out of me”

“Baby I think it's time your tell him you wanted him here to support your he was part of the birth plan”

Can one of you please tell me who you're calling about

“I'm sorry, Spence, and I don't know how to tell you this, but I reconnected with Aaron, and we got close again, and I wanted him here as a dad, and I love jack like a brother, and sometimes I accidentally call him dad and right now I'm feeling a lot of things, and I'm in so much pain right now I'm so sorry please don't be mad at me- owwwww omg this shit hurts so bad.”

“Y/n, why didn't you tell me this earlier? I don't know what?- I can't.”

“Spencer I love your you so so much and I know your upset and confused right now but can you please just for now be there for me and then you can be mad at me as much as you want after and please call Aaron”

“Baby, I'm staying with you, and your mums going to call Aaron, so it's all good, and I understand why you were scared, but please just come to me next time and tell me I wouldn't have been mad love”

“Okay, he's gonna be here anytime soon, okay, honey.”

“Okay mama my fucking God, I can't- this is too much I'm done now I can't do think can't I need to leave”

As you try to swing your legs around the side of the bed, ignoring the words of concern from; the nurses, doctors, your mother and spencer trying to stop you from escaping. Your room door opened, and Aaron walked in on the scene of people trying to prevent you from running, well, more like shuffling away. An uncharacteristic smile enveloped his face as he let out a high pitched laugh.

“What on earth are you doing y/n”

“What does it look like I'm doing? I can't do this anymore. It's too painful, and it's too much. I'm leaving.”

“You and I both know you can't leave, sweetheart, Reid. Let's help get y/n back on the bed, okay.”

“Reluctantly, with the help of y/m/n, Aaron and Spencer, you made it back of the bed.”

“Aaron, I'm scared”

“I know y/n but your so closes your nearly over with this all and you'll get to meet your beautiful baby”

“I know it's- wait, how do you know I'm nearly done? You've only just found out I'm in the hospital so. Clearly, my mum told you early than 20 minutes ago, and you weren't calling me sweetheart. You were calling her, sweetheart”

“Y/n honey, maybe you should practice your breathing excises one in one out like that”

“Nope, you will not be distracting me today women; you and Aaron are fucking Jesus you two are fucking why-owwww, another contraction.”

“Y/n love, We have just started messaging about you and your pregnancy, and everything just kind of developed from there.”

“As much as I am disturbed by the revelation right now in happy you're both deserve happiness, and my mind has been in love with since forever, well more specifically when you came back from Pakistan with that beard.”

“I love you and your mother so much, and it's good to see you again Spencer we have some catching up to do don't we”

“That we do indeed”

“I hate the spoil this lovely moment between you four but it's time y/n to push this baby out”

After 30 more minutes of pain, you gave birth to a beautiful baby girl; you and spencer sat on the bed caressing her cute little cheeks and seeing the tight ringlets of curls strewn around her head, you reflected on how blessed you were to be around the people you loved so dearly.

I guess all my heartburn was worth the hair on her huh

You and I both know that is just an old wives tale y/n

Let me bask in this Spencer for like 2 minutes and then you can fact check me later

Maybe Spencer was still upset with you and Aaron for keeping this secret. Perhaps your and Aaron relationship will change now because he's with your mother, but right now, all that matters is the sweet precious baby in you and spencers arms. And maybe everything will end up the way it was supposed to be.

A/n: This mutual appreciation fic is dedicated to @boldlyvoid; they are literally one of the kindest, sweetest people on this app. They are so caring and thoughtful and genuinely care about anyone who visits their page. We became mutuals when the community on here did some of the most disturbing things imaginable. I felt very excluded during this time, but Emily was so kind with her words and actions even when she didn't even know me that well and had no reason to be excellent. She's like the Tumblr big sister everyone needs on this app, calling people out after I was sent my first hate anon reblogging and celebrating when I post fics. And I think being the only two people in the world who ship Luke x, Matt and Kristy, together, lmao. Overall they are hilarious, kind and caring. Also, a fucking fantastic writer, and if you don't already follow them, then you need to right now!

Send as ask to be added to my taglist! Also tagging some aaron hotcner lovers

@spookyspence @sweetandsunny @arsonhotchner @shmaptainhotchnersmain

[goodfish-bowl]

A Machete and a Silver Chain

Danny Phantom and Gravity Falls Crossover

Summary: Dipper knows something is off with that new guy working the night shift at the only gas station in Gravity Falls, Danny.

AO3 Link

Words: 1927

Notes: Was supposed to be for Crossover Danuary Week 2022, but meh, better (super) late than never.

Dipper wanted proof. He craved it. He wanted to show Mabel that the cute guy she’d been doting on for the past few days was a threat. Dipper had the insatiable need to prove that Danny, the night shift employee at the only gas station in Gravity Falls, wasn’t human.

This Danny guy had started working there some time a few weeks after the twins had arrived in Gravity Falls. Candy and Grenda had quickly told Mabel about the development, including all the rumors. Danny was from out of town, looked to be in his teens, but when asked, said he was 18. No one knew him, he was a complete stranger. He never gave a last name, only to call him Danny. No one even had an idea where he lived, but the only time he was ever seen was late at night, working his shift at the gas station desk.

Now, when Dipper had first met the guy, he’d seemed nice (Wendy seemed to like him an uncomfortable amount, which only upset himself further, not that he would admit it,) but he sent chills down Dipper’s spine when those striking blue eyes stared at him a second too long. Mabel immediately fell in love (despite the fact that the guy was clearly not interested and at least a couple years older than her), but that wasn’t really surprising. The trio of girls giggled and gossiped about him, making up all sorts of stories about who he was and where he came from. Dipper was forced to listen to as many different iterations of cheesy romance tropes as he could remember. Runaway prince, undercover agent, runaway undercover agent, runaway undercover agent that was actually a prince…

“Maybe he’s a vampire or something?” Dipper threw out there.

Mable gasped, “I wonder if he sparkles in the sunlight?!”

“No!” Dipper exclaimed, “Vampire’s are dangerous, Mabel, and they definitely don’t sparkle.” Dipper quickly brought out his journal, quickly flipping to the page on vampires and shoved it in his twin's face. “See?! Dangerous! Vampires only look attractive so he can lure you away and eat you!”

“But the danger, Bro Bro, it makes the romance so much sweeter… a forbidden romance…” Mabel swooned, and the other two girls joined in.

Dipper groaned in agony, “Fine! Get yourself eaten. I’m going to actually do something about this!” He declared, jumping from his position on the bed and stumbling out of the room.

Dipper rushed through the Mystery Shack, nearly falling down the stairs, nearly tripping Grunkle Stan, punched in the code to the vending machine, and rushed into the hidden spaces below.

“Grunkle Ford!” Dipper called once the elevator reached the second floor.

“Ah, Dipper,” Grunkle Ford greeted, “Just in time! I could really use your help cleaning-”

Dipper cut off Grunkle Ford before he could get much farther, flipping to the page he had just shown to Mabel, and showing Grunkle Ford in turn.

“I think the new guy at the gas station is a vampire,” Dipper stated.

“Oh?” Grunkle Ford hummed, hand on his chin. “It’s been a while since I’ve heard of a vampire in Gravity Falls. They typically prefer more populated areas, but I suppose an isolated town in the middle of the woods has its own benefits,” Ford mused. “Can you describe him?”

Dipped nodded, “Yeah, um…” Dipper thought back on his meeting with Danny, “He’s really pale, he most likely says he’s older than he is. No one ever sees him during the day, only during his shift at the gas station. No one knows where he lives…” Dipper tried to think of something else, when another memory resurfaced, “His hands are super cold! Like holding onto something frozen. He didn’t show his teeth when he smiled. Oh, oh, oh! And his eyes! They’re really blue, but they do that thing, like a cat! Where they glow!” Dipper had almost fainted when the lights flickered and he saw bright green eyes in the dark, not that he was going to tell Grunkle Ford that.

Grunkle Ford seemed to think about it for a moment, “Yep, that sounds like a vampire, alright. Dipper, do you remember how to get rid of a vampire?” Ford asked.

Dipper pondered for a moment before answering, trying not to look at the book for the answer. ”Wooden stake or silver?” He guessed.

Ford grinned, “Those will hurt the vamp, but not kill it. To kill a vampire you need to behead it.”

Dipper paled, “Behead?!”

Ford sighed, tired but sympathetic. “Vampires are dangerous, Dipper,” Ford explained, “If we don’t get rid of him, he could hurt a lot of people, that’s not even counting the people he might have already killed.”

Dipper gulped, not liking the idea, but agreeing that it sounds reasonable, “Alright, I guess. But we have to make sure first. Do you have anything for that?”

Ford hummed in thought, snapping when he obviously had an idea, and began rummaging through some drawers in the lab. Dipper watched anxiously. He really hoped Ford wouldn’t just outright kill Danny. Sure, Danny could be a dangerous vampire, but he could also just be a weirdly creepy guy. Dipper didn’t like the idea of hurting someone who didn’t deserve it. (Dipper didn’t want to think about how Ford probably wouldn't have checked to make sure Danny is a vampire first if he hadn’t mentioned it.)

Ford pulled out a thick silver chain with a cross dangling from it with a triumphant shout. “Silver! It won’t kill him, but it will certainly do the trick of proof. The cross is iron too. Won’t hurt a vamp, but it works on a lot of other things,” Ford explained, and Dipper mentally jotted down notes. (He would physically jot them down later.)

Ford checked the clock, “Six o-clock, sun sets in a couple of minutes,” Ford turned to him, “Are you ready?”

Dipper nodded, swallowing his doubt and the dreadful feeling in his stomach that something bad was going to happen.

Dipper carefully watched Danny through the window to the gas station. Neither Dipper nor Ford could find out how Danny had arrived, he had just walked out of the back like he had been there the entire time. (They’d been staked out here for about an hour and a half, watching people come and go, Danny had only been on shift for about a third of it.) Ford was waiting until the lull in late night activity, so that there were very little chance of them being interrupted should something go south. Mabel was most definitely asleep by now, but Dipper was helping people, so he’d stay awake for as long as it took.

Ford gave Dipper a light shove somewhere around 1:30 am, jolting the boy away from his half-doze. Dipper gave a small, started yelp at the sudden contact, only to be shoved quickly down by Ford. Danny was looking over in their direction, eyes narrowed. Dipper stiffened, there was no way a normal person would have heard that. Ford and Dipper stayed frozen for what could have easily been twenty minutes, before Danny went back to paying attention to whatever he was doing on the laptop set up in front of him.

Ford handed Dipper a machete when it was time, one that was sharp and light enough for him to use. He still held it unsteadily.

“Hide it under your jacket. I’ll be the one to check, you’re my back up,” Ford ordered, and Dipper nodded, slipping the machete into the back of his jacket.

They emerged from their hiding spot and casually walked into the gas station, a small bell announcing their arrival. Danny looked up for a split second, blue eyes piecing them, before he returned to his work. Dipper still felt like he was being carefully watched, the uncomfortable chill of the machete against his shirt feeling like it was burning him. Ford beckoned him to a place between the shelves and away from the cameras, a blind spot, then began gesturing with his hands in some sort of code.

Ford agreed that there was something up with Danny. Dipper was supposed to stay crouched down until Ford signaled him. Ford was going to approach Danny now.

“Young man, could you take a look at something for me real quick?” Ford asked, pretending to be the old man he really was.

“Huh?” Danny asked, looking up somewhat surprised, “Sure, I guess?”

“I have this old chain, and the clasp is broken, but my eyes aren’t what they used to be. Do you think you could latch it for me?”

Danny shrugged, “Sure thing.”

Ford pressed the silver chain into Danny’s hand. No reaction. Danny looked at the chain.

“Huh, this is quite the piece,” Danny hummed. Then he went to grab the cross to get a better look at the cross.

Danny let out a startled gasp when he made contact with it, yanking back his hand in shock. The cross had burned him, not the chain. Ford lunged all the same, easily clearing the counter, and making a grab to pin Danny on the ground. Danny shouted and grunted, trying to get Ford off of him and Dipper rushed out of his position and gave the machete to Ford across the counter. He couldn’t see the fight on the ground behind the counter, but from the sound of it, Ford was barely able to keep Danny down.

In that second when he handed off the machete, Dipper got a glimpse of the situation. Ford had his arm pinned against Danny’s throat, who was snarling back, sharpened canines snapping and scratching at Ford trying to escape, eyes blown wide in panic and doused in a toxic green Dipper had never seen before. Ford snatched the machete and held it to Danny’s neck, the point drawing a thin line of blood. Danny froze, muscles still drawn taunt, and Ford rasped on top of him, holding Danny in place.

“I don’t know what you are,” Ford growled, “but the only beings I know that are burned by pure iron are much more dangerous than vampires.”

Danny didn’t say anything, probably due to the machete at his neck, and Ford’s attention seemed to be drawn to something Dipper couldn’t see.

“I wasn’t hurting anyone,” Dipper heard Danny whisper, sad and solemn, but it was nearly drowned out by Ford’s startled shout,

Ford shot to his feet and snapped his head around, looking for something. Ford easily cleared the counter, and Dipper glanced over it. Danny was gone… but he had been there just a second ago. He had heard the creepy teen speak. But no one was there now. Ford rushed through the gas station for a minute or two, looking for someone that wasn’t there, before slumping in on himself with a tired sigh.

“Grunkle Ford,” Dipper asked hesitantly, “What happened?”

“He got away,” Ford admitted, exhausted,“He slipped right through the floor once he was able to gain his bearings. I don’t think he’ll be coming back here anytime soon either.” Ford glanced at the machete and approached Dipper. “But this wasn’t a wasted trip, look.”

Dipper glanced at the blood on the tip of the machete. It was red and green, a neon toxic green to be exact, but neither was able to fully mix with each other, creating a marbled effect.

“Do you know what Danny is?” Dipper asked, almost fearing the answer.

Ford looked down, shoulders tense and jaw clenched.

“Dangerous.”

[whaleofatjme1920]

Searching for Hidden Things (Ticci Toby X F!Reader)

Searching for Hidden Things

[Ticci Toby X F!Reader]

[Warnings: it's kinda sad? Language, blood but only slight.]

[AN: Another good one from Eris]

You are convinced that your home is haunted now more than ever. While you are not particularly ghost believer inclined, as a witch, your mind is open to these kinds of happenings but that’s not your field of study - you’re much more inclined to herbology and green witchery as opposed to medium and seership into other planes of existence. The natural, real world is what you are focused on. Not some spectre that happens to like little knickknacks that you don’t even claim ownership to.

How on earth did you end up here?

Simple. Fresh out of college and working from home, you decided to leave your stuffy city and come out to the countryside to get back into nature. It took forever to find a place that piqued your interest, but a small town smack dab in the middle of Alabama. You’re almost dead certain there’s barely five thousand people in the area. Though, you hardly stick around long enough to find out.

You only dip into town in the evenings and get the groceries that you can’t grow. Let’s just say you really enjoy living off the land and that practice helps you further your own craft. It’s anything a hedgewitch might dream of. The people that live here are pleasant, but they’re silent.

It was a normal evening visiting your favorite curiosity and occult shop run by a sweet girl and her partner who have come to expect you weekly on Saturdays. You usually stay for tea and a cupcake or whatever baked good Zinnia and Briar have set up for you, and it is from one of these little sit downs that you found out your home isn’t exactly normal.

“It’s so nice to see you again, love bug!” Briar smiles widely, their arms opening to greet you.

You smile back and walk into their arms and hug back just as tightly. “I could never miss tea time with my two favorite curio owners,” you chuckle.

Zinnia pops out from the back, her hands are covered by oven mitts. “I just made some brownies! Also have some angel food cake from last night. Come, come. Briar? Get the tea,” she says as she rushes to the back to set up the table in the sunroom.

Briar nods and puts their hand on your upper back, guiding you to the back. “My wife thought you would’ve liked the angel food cake. She’s been talking about it all night,” they explain, a giggle on their lips.

Zinnia is buzzing around like a bumble bee while her partner attempts to get her to sit down. She’s a good host, you’ll give her that. This is your fourth sit down with them and she’s like this every time.

“Reader isn’t going to care about the plates-” Briar attempts to say before getting shushed by Zinnia.

“I like being aesthetically pleasing,” she says as Briar absentmindedly ties her curly black hair into a ponytail. “Unlike you,” she giggles.

You roll your eyes playfully at their sweet gestures. “Aesthetically pleasing or not, those brownies and the cake look delicious.”

“See? Reader gets it,” Briar lightly ribs before bringing the tea to the table, Zinnia following close behind them with platters and plates. “So,” Briar hums. “How is your place?”

You begin pouring yourself some tea and shrug. “I don’t think I ever mentioned it to you, have I?”

The couple shake their heads as they get comfortable in their seats. “Where have you put your boots down?” Zinnia inquires.

“There’s this little house in the woods,” you begin to explain before sipping at your tea. “Had a great garden and was already furnished, asked the realtor and she practically threw it into my arms.” You put down your tea cup and cut a brownie for yourself before raising a brow at the couple’s shocked and slightly confused expressions. “What’s wrong?”

Briar blinks a few times before shaking their head. “It’s nothing! Just, it’s the house in the woods?”

You nod in confirmation. “The house in the west woods, near the pond with water lilies?” You continue in an attempt to further their understanding, getting the feeling there’s something you don’t know but should. “Guys..?”

“S-Sorry,” Zinnia suddenly says. “It’s just that…” Her eyes shift around for a few moments before she leans in close, as if she was telling you a secret. “That house is haunted.”

Your eyes go wide before you laugh. You laugh and laugh and then when you realize they’re silent, you blink. “Wait what? Why do you say that?”

“Someone used to live there a few years ago, we moved in after her… disappearance,” Briar explains. “She just,” Briar makes a poof shape with their hands, “like nothing. No trace, no leads, the house was empty but everything of theirs? Still there.”

“Who was the person that lived there before?” You ask, intrigue kicking up before you bite into the brownies and then try the angel food cake. Zinnia was right, you do like it.

Briar shrugs, “we don’t know. Whispers say it was the girl named Natalie. She kept to herself but from the people I’ve talked to so far - at least, those who would talk about it - said she was sweet and spunky.”

“Guy at the grocery store, Mr. Wu? He said that Natalie was his regular. They were friends,” Zinnia adds on. “He used to visit her house every now and then and said near the end, her behavior got kind of squirrely. One night, he went to visit her and saw her running. Of course, guy is like seventy, got scared and ran back home. Called the police over it. They got there? Nothing.”

You nod as you listen to them give out their theories on what might have happened to Natalie. It’s one of the most interesting things you’ve heard of since you moved in.

When you returned home, you couldn’t help but shake the thought you were a guest in what used to be Natalie’s home. Your hands flew over the slightly dusty shelves and found it wrong to really touch anything that might not be yours. There’s books about boring things, encyclopedias, general knowledge, young adult fiction, but nothing that tells you who she was.

As you stand with your arms crossed in your living room, you search for the things that were left from her. Your room is entirely yours, you’ve already managed to find a room and clear it out for your witchy things, the kitchen was empty and there is no basement. This house is small, more like a cottage. If there were any signs of who she was, they’re not easy at making themselves known.

All you have to go off of from her is the living room and is undoubtedly Natalie’s and not yours. The shelves and other knick knacks are things that don’t match your aesthetic at all. Seems she was fond of the color green, just not plants like you are.

It’s by the living room that you’re able to learn some things about Natalie, even if they’re minute. For instance, you can tell that either she likes costumes or she’s missing an eye due to a small box of eyepatches varying in color and design. She’s got a frew petal pressed flowers - tulips - and last you checked, that meant a declaration of love according to the standard Victorian language of flowers.

You know absolutely nothing about Natalie other than her name and that she may be missing an eye and that she has tulips, but she permeates your mind like a virus that refuses to go away. You’re entranced with her, and want to know more of her.

When you work on sigils, you make one for her and put it in the corners of the front windows and in the doorframe. You wonder if she’s out there, and if she is, if she’s safe. If she is, you hope the runes and sigils you’ve made for her will keep her that way.

One evening at the grocery store, you have the privilege of being able to speak to Mr. Wu when ringing up some craving you’ll know you’ll inevitably have.

“Natalie?” He hums as he rings up your items. “She was a nice girl,” he continues. “Very kind, had a good sense of humor.”

You furrow your brows and smile sympathetically at him. “I’m sorry for-”

“It’s no matter,” Mr. Wu brushes off. “I don’t know what happened to her, and I’d like to think she’s still out there,” he begins checking the register for the total. “I’d like to think that when she was running, it was towards better and away from whatever it was she couldn’t get here..” His old, weathered hand reaches out to show you the total on the screen. You notice he’s put on a 50% discount. “On me,” he smiles.

Ever since then, Natalie has consumed your thoughts entirely.

So, how does this all tie into a little sparrow figurine going missing? You think it’s haunted. Genuinely. Have you angered Natalie’s spirit by messing with her house? You’re not so sure. You don’t communicate with spirits, though you’re considering picking up a pendulum and attempting.

Ever since you’ve heard about Natalie, things in your house have been getting moved or straight up lifted. It doesn’t help that you hear, no, you think you hear, things outside lurking around your home. Spiritually, you’ve protected the place more than you think is necessary. The not deer, skinny legends and Wendy boys really shouldn’t be knocking around her mostly because the place is just one giant protective bubble. Still, as you sit up late in the night and look at the moon as it reflects the water from the pond and the peer through the darkness of the trees that hang much too low, you know something is out there that shouldn’t be.

This has all come to a head when you wake up one morning to see that the sparrow figurine is gone. It makes you startle and almost drop your mug in response.

“How the hell..?” You say as you stare at the empty space. Its little circular base has left the real shade of the wood it sits on open. The dust has accumulated around it. You saw it here just yesterday! Little brown and tan sparrow and now it’s gone.

On instinct, you open your front door. It was still locked, and it doesn’t seem that anyone came in. But you know that you didn’t move it either. You haven’t touched any of Natalie’s things, you wouldn’t because you’re worried you’re going to upset her spirit or something. Who took it?

Unfortunately, that’s not even the first time it’s happened. A few days later, the little robin is gone too. Now you are absolutely convinced your home is haunted.

Of course, you call up one of your friends who also practices witchcraft like you do to see what you can do about making amends with a spirit. He’s a death witch - he should know.

“Wait what?” He says, his voice conveying nothing but confusion.

“You heard me,” you sigh as you plop down on the couch. “I think she’s been like, taking things because she doesn’t trust me with them?” You say in a slightly confused tone.

“But you really haven’t moved anything in the living room, right? From the pictures you sent me, you left that space as hers. She shouldn’t be upset considering you never touched her stuff.”

“But these figurines are still missing. How did they just get up and go?” You ask in a slightly exasperated tone, staring at the empty space.

“Y’know what you should try?” He begins, a small audible smile on his face. “Find something personal of hers and return it to her. Maybe she’s looking for something and is just settling.”

“Do you have a protocol for that or..?” You trail off.

“I’ll send you a page from my grimoire, sounds good?”

Here you are, late at night, not able to sleep and looking for something personal of hers. You don’t think it’s anything out in the open that she wants because why would she want that? It’s in her line of sight. You’ve practically turned up your home looking for it - her home? You’re not sure what kind of terminology you should use in regards to this house, but you know you’re hellbent on finding something, anything of importance to her home.

“Come on, Natalie,” you mumble to yourself as you head to your bedroom and begin overturning things. “I just need something of yours, help me make it make sense,” you say. “Natlie, Natalie, Nat, Nat-” and immediately after that nickname tumbles from your lips, you get the overwhelming urge to check under your bed.

Like a mad woman, you dive down to the floor and begin pulling your storage boxes out from under it. One of them snags slightly, and when you tug on it, you pull. Odd. You tug even harder. That’s when part of the carpet comes up. You raise your brow and shove the box out of the way before crawling under yourself and use the flashlight on your phone. It’s dark, a little dusty under here, but you clearly know someone has been under here before.

Your fingertips creep around the edge of the odd piece of carpet before you pull it up, seeing that it’s already been cut up. And there, you feel a handle.

“Oh my gods,” you mumble creeping further under the bed before yanking at the small handle. It doesn’t give right away. In fact, it makes you bump your head from the sheer force of trying to open it. It’s almost as if it was a secret and you’re violating the parties who knew it existed. Still, you continue to tug on it before it finally pops open. You move your phone over to see that there’s a box with the lid loosely placed on. Your hand gently reaches in and scoops the box up. You hold it like it’s glass. “Thank you, Natalie, thank you,” you mumble as you roughly and awkwardly crawl out from back under the bed.

You sit on your bedroom floor now, your phone now forgotten as your fingertips gently trace the box. You mentally ask for Natalie’s permission to open it and when you get the feeling of something warm, like a hug, you do so. Inside the box that you gingerly open, you see that there are letters, letters upon letters in a writing addressed to her.

“Can I read these, Natalie?” You ask softly, your eyes scanning over the one you hold in your hand dates from a few years ago. You feel that warm hug again, and the night alights with songs from the birds on the pond. You know you have her permission.

‘March 16, 20XX. Dear Natalie, how are you? I just wanted to apologize for the other day. I shouldnt have left that soon, but you know hoy my dad is. Anyways, just wanted to check in. Hope to see you soon.’

‘March 22, 20XX. Dear Natalie, I wasn’t actually expecting you to get back to me after what happened! I - thank you. Things have been just fine with me, but I miss being in Alabama. No reason, just miss the woods by your place.’

‘May 5th, 20XX. It’s funny you mentioned that, I saw something last night that reminded me of you too. Y’know how you’re always going on about time and being punctual? The other day, me and my comrades were walking through an antique store. Whole bunch of clocks. Made me think of you:).’

You keep reading the letters and piecing together the story of these two as it picks up through the years as general friendship to something more. This person that Natalie was writing to told them a lot of things - everything from the general happenings of the day to more quieter, intimate things (that you tend to skip over out of respect for Natalie.)

Reading the letters to Natalie becomes a daily occurrence for you. There’s so many that you decide it wouldn’t be right to read them all in one day. So, you read two a night and piece together their story, learning of their love and finding out just who they were. Natalie left some letters that she never sent to her love, mostly the ones that she must have considered duds or the angry ones that she decided not to send when her fire had died down. What? All couples go through those patches. It’s whether you can fix it and get back on the road or hitchhike with another driver that determines the outcome. And them? They loved each other so much, looking at another driver to get to their destination was never an option.

It takes months for you to get through the letters. Even reading two a day, it’s hard to get through a few years worth of content. They wrote to each other often. You’re able to see the full spectrum of emotions from them two, even if you’re on;y reading the letters addressed TO Natalie and not from her (for the most part). You read them smiling, and can hear their tears alongside their laughter. They no longer feel like names on paper, but real, once breathing people.

Eventually, you reach a letter that finally completes the story as you know it. It’s dated from right around the time you know Zinnia and Briar moved in. It explains a lot.

You know that whoever Natalie’s love was working for was NOT a good man. He struck the fear of the gods into them. He was called ‘The Operator’ and apparently had eyes everywhere despite being faceless. The way Natalie’s love writes about him has you feeling chills down your spine. Them too, because it was enough for them to want to run away. Natalie’s love was called a proxy, and from what you can understand, that means he’s a person who does work for someone else because they don’t want to get directly involved. The Operator treats those who work under him like cattle, and nothing more. He was a scary, scary man, and the society he runs is one you know is not intertwined with yours.

The letter that’s in your hands is the last one before their escape it seems.

‘August 31st, 2018. Dear Nat, are you nervous? I’m nervous - you can probably tell by my writing. Tonight we leave everything behind. We run. I hope you know that it’s never too late for you to back out. Because after this, we can never go back to what we used to. I’m so sorry that being around that tall fuck-but did this to you - and shit, by extension, me. I’m so sorry for hurting you, but this is it. This is it. This is the final stop.

Who knew that me striking up a conversation with a cute girl behind the counter of some hippy’s coffee shop would lead to a love like ours? You mean the world to me, Nat. I’m more and more thankful every day that I think about you and receiving your letters has me up to the moon. If you asked me about this kind of thing before I met you, I would have told you that I would never have gotten rid of the proxy lifestyle for a human. Humans are… Well, according to the Operator, they’re dangerous. They’re not worth us.

But you? Oh gods, you? You changed everything. You made it worthwhile. You came into my life like a splash of color in a world so grey and cold and bathed me in warmth until I could reciprocate your love and make room for it to grow. I love you, Natalie. I love you so, so much. After tonight, we won’t ever have to worry about this - the space and the distance between us. No more hiding. No more secrets. Just us and our transparency.

I love you, Natalie. I love you so, so much. I’ll see you tonight, backdoor as per what is our usual. To the moon and back! Love, Toby.’

You don’t know why, but Toby’s letter makes you tear up. It’s like you can feel exactly how Natalie must’ve felt when she received it. The tears that prick your eyes roll down your cheeks and you can’t help but take a few moments. You’d always known their story ended with something sad due to the whispers in the town, but getting confirmation that Natalie ran… It didn’t work. It just didn’t work.

You’re wiping away your tears when you hear your backdoor get thrown open. No one comes out to your neck of the woods, and it makes you panic. You can’t find your phone - dang it! Must’ve left it in the kitchen. You scramble around your room as you hear whoever just broke into your house walk confidently without a care in the world to the living room.

“W-Who the f-fuck lives here n-now?” You hear a male voice mutter as they pass your bedroom door. “A-All this w-w-witchy shit,” they continue.

You mentally huff. Rude. You then quietly slink around before grabbing a large chunk of amethyst. It’s rough to the touch and weighty, and unfortunately, one of the only things you have as a weapon now. Your heart is pounding as you quietly move through your hallway to the living room.

“Where i-is it?” He continues mumbling to himself as he tears your living room apart.

You’re able to see him by the faint light of the moon. He’s got brown hair and twitches slightly. Is he nervous? He’s still tearing up your living room though and touching Natalie’s things, and that's unforgivable in your head. So, you raise your chunk of amethyst pillar and quietly creep behind him.

He turns around to look at you, genuinely surprised someone is here when you whack him as hard as you can with the chunk of amethyst. “Are y-you fucking s-serious?!” He yells as he pushes you back.

You look at him with confusion as you back up, still clutching the amethyst before you notice that he didn’t react in the way he should. You hit him really, really hard and in the back of the head. He’s back up and glaring at you like you mildly inconvenienced him. And now? Now he’s pissed and looking at you like he’s going to kill you. You notice that he has hatchets on the sides of his waist.

“C-Come here,” he taunts, eyes narrowed and slowly closing the distance between you.

“Stop,” you shout in an attempt to command him back. “I will hit you-”

“With t-that?” He sneers.

“I swear to the gods I will-”

He looks like he’s ready to pounce when he suddenly stops, a certain sadness and pause rushing over his body and his face as he looks at the letters in your hand. You’d honestly forgotten you were still holding them.

“Where d-did you g-g-g-get those?” He asks quietly, his shoulder dropping.

“What?” You ask, surprised he can do an impression of a human being.

“Those l-letters! They’re n-not yours!” You pull back hard when he tries to grab them from you and swing the amethyst at him and sneer when he ducks. “They’re not yours either!”

“T-The hell t-they aren’t! I-I wrote t-t-them!” He shouts back.

You immediately deflate. “You’re Toby?”

He freezes and flails his arms slightly as if to ask nonverbally, ‘you read those?’

You sigh deeply and rest your hand on your forehead before you rest your arms down slowly, showing that you’re not going to fight him. It’s a pleasant surprise that he slowly copies your movements. “Do you know how a keurig works?”

He nods slowly.

“Make us some coffee. We got a lot to talk about.”

“So, t-t-that’s why you’re here,” Toby hums as he dumps another unholy amount of sugar into his coffee cup. “I-I thought y-you were some s-squatter in Nat’s h-house,” he admits with a small chuckle before scratching awkwardly at the back of his neck.

You take in a small breath and nod, a small smile pulling your lips upwards. “This is what you were looking for, huh?” You say as you push the box full of memories towards him.

He puts the cup down and takes it into his hands carefully before hugging it to his chest. He then takes in a deep breath, relaxing. “Y-Yes, this is t-them,” he says quietly. “That’s a-a-all I really w-wanted.”

“And the little figurines?” You hum, a knowing smirk on your face.

Toby flushes slightly and nods once more. “T-They just r-r-reminded me o-of her.” He then places the box in front of him and leans back, his eyes blinking upwards towards the ceiling before he stares up at the ceiling. “I lost h-her that n-night,” he says, voice so soft and scared as if he’s reliving it.

“Toby…”

“That w-w-was our thing, y-y’know? W-We were gonna b-b-be free. My b-b-boss found out,” Toby hisses as he picks one of the letters up and gestures with it, “a-and he s-sent my own c-comrades to…” He closes his eyes to stop the tears from welling within them.

-

Natalie was grabbing her backpack from her room with everything important when Toby came to the doorway and smiled at her. “What’re you doing here?” She chuckled, her green eye flashing with amusement. “Thought you were gonna be getting stuff ready in the kitchen and watching the door.”

“Just d-don’t like being a-a-away from you,” Toby said, a small smirk on his face as he came up to Natalie and brushed a long strand of brown hair from her face. “You’re s-s-such a p-pretty girl,” he complimented.

Natalie blushed slightly and took his hand that rested on her cheek into hers. “Go. I’ll be fine in here.”

“W-Whatever you s-say, p-princess,” he teased before pressing a kiss to her forehead and hesitantly leaving her side.

Natalie rolled her eyes with that smile never leaving her face as she continued getting the last of her things ready for the leave. When she was absolutely certain she was ready to go, she slid the backpack on and headed to the living room. She was ready to go and start a new life with Toby, the only man who ever made her heart skip a beat.

“Are you ready?” She asked, her arms wrapping around Toby’s waist as he finished his cup of coffee.

“S-Sure am,” he replied before turning around and wrapping her in his arms. “You g-gonna miss t-t-this place?”

“Absolutely not,” Natalie laughed. “I can’t wait to get out-”

What happened next was pure chaos. The back and front door were both breached by men in masks, and Natalie quickly deduced that they were Toby’s comrades. His boss found out. Toby reached for the front table and palmed his hatchets and swung them at the man in the white mask.

“Run!” Toby shouted, pushing Natalie towards the open front door. He watched his heart run out and shake off the backpack to gain speed as she took off into the night. Masky hit him, but he did not flinch.

“Fucking hell, Toby!” A gruff voice shouted.

The young proxy then watched in horror as a flash of yellow zipped out into the night to chase after Natalie. Toby felt worry cloud hsi every movement as he dodged and hit Masky. Hoodie’s specialty was tracking and hunting. He had to get out there to help Natalie.

Toby took a step back then ran into Masky as hard as he could, slamming his leader into the floor before attempting to brutalize, but not kill him. When he was sure that Masky was going to need a moment, he shot up and sprinted out of the house and into the darkened forest to find Natalie. He must’ve prayed the entire time he ran.

He ran over the heavy forest growth and cursed the roots that almost tripped him before he felt his world go quiet.

Natalie was screaming.

Toby heard his name cried out in the trees and his heart sunk down to the forest floor as he ran wildly to the source. He felt hot tears as they rolled down his cheeks as he finally found that same damned hue of yellow waiting for him.

“Was wondering when you’d show up,” Hoodie mused as he dug his boot onto Natalie’s skull, making her cry out in pain and fear. Her arms reached out for Toby, his name permanently on her lips.

“You f-fucking bastard!” Toby roared as he lurched forward, attempting to beat Hoodie within an inch of his life when something hard smacked into the back of his head. Toby turned around to see Masky. His brown eyes were full of murder as he stalked towards Toby.

“I should kill you for this,” Masky sneered as he got within arm’s distance of Toby.

Toby glared and swung his hatchet again at Masky, now out for blood when Hoodie slammed his boot back into Natalie’s skull, a crack sending Toby into a fury.

“You won’t touch him if you know what’s good for you,” Hoodie said, his hands loosely hung in his pockets. “Leave him alone and focus on your girl.”

Toby felt chills down his spine as he turned his full attention to Natalie. “My g-g-girl,” he whispered as he fell to his knees to hold her. “M-My s-sweet, sweet g-girl.” His hands shoved Hoodie off of her skull, giving her room to breathe. After that, he turned her over on her back as she cried out in pain. He rested her head on his lap and let her sob.

“Toby,” she croaked in a voice like sandpaper. “Toby, it hurts,” she cried, hands reaching out to his face.

“I know,” he said as he gripped her hand. “I k-know, baby, I k-know.” Tears were pouring from his eyes just to see someone he loved in such pain. “It’ll b-be over soon, I p-promise.” His other hand that wasn’t being gripped by Natalie’s went to pet her hair and give her some comfort.

“Over real soon,” Masky huffed. “You better finish this.” Masky continued. “Or I’ll make Hoodie put a bullet in her skull.”

Toby sent another glare up to Masky and protectively held onto Natalie just a bit harder to not cause her physical body anymore pain.

“We need to run,” Natalie whispered as she reached up to hold Toby’s face. “We can still go-”

Toby hushed her as his eyes scanned over her body. She was beyond repair. Hoodie had broken her legs and bent them at angles that should not exist. “You n-need to r-rest, okay? W-We’ll go in t-t-the morning, I p-promise.”

“You do?” She asked, her beautiful green eye beginning to see the world more in shapes than in

“Y-Yes,” Toby promises. “Have I e-e-ever broken a p-promise to y-you?” He hummed before leaning down as best he could to kiss her forehead. “I l-love you, s-so, so m-much.”

Natalie sleepily giggled and allowed her tears to cascade down her face. “I love you too. To the moon and back?”

“T-To the moon a-a-and back,” he said as the grip she held on his hand weakened.

“Toby, my Toby,” she said softly, her voice growing softer as she repeated the words like a mantra. When her breathing slowed until it was nothing, her hand went limp in Toby’s.

Toby closed his eyes as his heart fell into millions of pieces. He refused to let Natalie go that night, and his teammates, who had acted on behalf of a father who did not love them, let him.

-

“A p-part of m-me died with h-her that night,” Toby says as he lovingly looks over the letters. “I still c-can’t breathe r-right without her.” He closes his eyes and allows his tears to fall. “I d-don’t think I e-e-ever will.”

You get up from your seat and pick it up, silently moving it to rest next to Toby as he begins to cry. You know he must’ve held this one in for so, so long. After planting your chair down next to him, you take him into your arms and allow him to cry.

Toby holds onto you and doesn’t let go. It’s like he views you as a comfort blanket or a teddy bear. And you let him. You let him get it all out.

You feel tears well in your eyes and let them fall too.

[dancingazaleas]

𖨆. 03 / all for us

summary: you’ve been gone for a while and haven’t been replying to any of your texts messages. you’re friends suspect something might be up.

note: the reader has been left alone continuously ever since she has been kidnapped. erwin and levi are the only ones who see her, and it’s usually only for an hour or two. this is because of her reluctance to be around them.

taglist: @voltairelesecond @the-sun-baby @uniquepickle @baelo80

word count: +3.0k

warnings/notes: cursing, vomiting, your friends are looking for you

PIECK knew something was up whenever bertholdt said you weren't answering his texts and hadn't been showing up to work before you even went on vacation. she knew you were on vacation and that you were pissed with her, but even so you never ignored texts from bertholdt.

her suspicions only rose whenever porco and reiner told her the same thing, that you'd suddenly gone awol on the two of them out of nowhere.

they were confirmed when zeke came back into town and said the same thing.

she sits on her couch, shoulders shaking as she cries with porco's arms wrapped around her. reiner, bert, zeke, and annie, who reiner and bert brought for some reason, stare at her in complete worry.

you went awol just this sunday, telling each and everyone of them that you were going on vacation and wouldn't be in town for a little while. bertholdt hadn't seen you at work for almost three weeks now, two and a half of them after your sudden vacation.

"she can't be on vacation," pieck sobs, "she always answers your guys' texts. no matter what!"

"maybe she's just in a different country? she might just not be able to get reception," porco seems unsure as he says this.

"she can't be. she would've told me, pieck, or even bertholdt. god, she would've told all of us," zeke's head is in his hands while his teeth grind together.

"okay, so where would she be if she were still in paradis," annie speaks up while gesturing her arm in a circle.

"who fucking knows," reiner sighs, "when'd you last see her, babe?"

"at work before she stopped showing up. she said she was gonna get coffee at that one café she loves going to. other than that, she didn't say anything about plans or going out with anybody," bertholdt is laced with confusion and his arms are crossed.

"we got into a bad fight that night," pieck sniffles, "she left the house a few hours later, i just thought she was going to stay with one of you guys or yelena."

"what'd you even argue about?"

she grips at her hair with tears rushing down her face, "i can't even remember. it was probably so petty and stupid. the only thing i remember is her telling me that she hated me and me telling her that she was a fuck up."

"i'm so sorry, pieck," porco squeezes her shaky form tight to his chest.

"wait," zeke's standing up abruptly and pointing at bertholdt, "she went where?!"

"oh my god, she went to café scout!!! maybe the workers heard something," reiner perks up along with everyone else.

"holy shit, maybe that one girl is there!! she probably saw something," porco smiles.

"louise! she definitely knows (name)! she probably saw something! let's go," pieck jumps off of the couch and stumbles towards the front door of her house.

the rest of them follow after, all deciding that bertholdt's van, he's usually the designated driver, is the car they'll get into. they all yell at a fumbling bertholdt to hurry up and unlock the car as they stand at the car. he does so while screaming, jumping into the driver's seat and starting the ignition. reiner's jumping in the passenger seat and annie's in the first row of seats behind bert.

before porco can even close the door behind him, bertholdt is driving off towards the café. porco is screaming along with pieck as they're thrown around the van due to their lack of seatbelts and the both of them standing to sit in their seat. their screaming has everyone else screaming as bert speeds up the car despite the oncoming speed bump. bertholdt and reiner hit their heads against the roof of the car, a loud bang resonating throughout the vehicle. pieck and porco's back hit the roof as well, but luckily for pieck she lands on the first row of seats next to annie.

porco, unfortunately, lands on the floor. zeke would've laughed if it wasn't for his own head slamming against the carpeted roof of the van. annie holds onto pieck's arm whenever she's in a sitting position, screaming along with reiner for bertholdt to slow the car down as they see another speed bump.

he doesn't.

porco is once again thrown against the roof.

bertholdt is speeding, even as he gets onto the freeway with other cars. he's stressed out.

when they get there, they all wonder how the fuck bertholdt didn't even get pulled over and how the hell they even managed to survive. bertholdt cries out apologies as reiner and porco puke their guts out in the huge parking lot while annie gags and tries not to vomit at watching reiner and porco do it themselves. pieck is holding her hand and trying to cover her eyes while zeke manages to cover her ears and cringes at porco and reiner.

bertholdt's now sobbing at annie, profusely apologizing, even getting on all fours and begging for her forgiveness.

"how are you gonna get on your hands and knees for annie but not for your boyfriend," porco coughs before he spits out saliva to get rid of the taste in his mouth.

reiner follows behind him in a grimace, hand grabbing at his now emptied stomach and the other going to wipe at his mouth.

"dude, gross!! don't wipe it off with your hands!! pieck and bertholdt usually have tissues on hand," porco shouts to reiner, who drops his hand halfway.

pieck and zeke comfort the emetophobe annie all while bertholdt gives reiner and porco tissues and a breath mint. he gives them hand sanitizer as well, and throws a pack of peppermint frost gum at the two of them, clogging his nose up.

they scoff but oblige, both now looking somehow decent and also smelling it. pieck's calming down a shaking annie, who's buried herself in pieck's warm arms, and zeke stands to the side awkwardly.

porco and reiner rush to the order counter when they all step inside, ordering instead of asking the cashier for the employee they were looking for. annie, who's now calm, pushes them aside harshly.

"ignore them, is that girl louise working today? we need to talk to her," she asks and the poor cashier is terrified at annie's deadpan face.

"n-no!! sh-she should be at home!!"

"give me her address," annie starts to lean her front over the counter, almost pushing the poor girl into a heart attack.

she grabs a napkin and a pen, hurriedly scribbling down louise's address and running off into the back.

"we can get food on the way there," annie shrugs nonchalantly, "preferably wendy's or something."

————

bertholdt and pieck almost feel bad for the poor girl whenever she answers the door.

with annie's glare piercing into her and zeke's towering over her, they were sure she'd pissed herself.

"y-yes... what do you need," she digs her nails into the door.

pieck shoves them both aside and steps forward, louise lights up with recognition.

"don't worry, they aren't gonna hurt you," she waves her hand, completely ignoring how they both still glare at louise even over pieck's shoulder, "i just need to ask you something."

"what is it?"

"have you seen (name) lately? the girl who usually come in with me."

"last time i saw her was around a few weeks ago," louise shrugs, "wait, did she go missing?!"

"yea, we're trying to figure out where she was last on the night of her disappearance. did she say anything to you...? anything at all," pieck steps forward with a desperate hand on her heart.

"she said something about going drinking with two friends... something about them being blonde and short," she scratches at her temple, slight pout on her face, "that's all i can remember."

"did she say what bar," pieck steps closer again, putting her hand on the door frame.

louise shakes her head sadly, eyes dropping down to their feet.

with that, pieck broke into tears again and was led away by porco and annie. the rest of them followed behind, leaving louise inside her home.

"she has to be somewhere," pieck cries into her hands, "she has to be!!"

zeke's got a hand on his forehead while he loosely holds onto his glasses with his other hand. he lets out a choked out sob, and everyone turns to him.

"zeke... are you... crying?" reiner turns to look at zeke over his shoulder.

"fuck.. yea. it just doesn't make sense. she's gotta be somewhere," he rubs the bridge of his nose.

"maybe the guys louise mentioned know something...," bertholdt inserts as he looks in the rear view mirror.

the statement has pieck shouting at the meek boy, "we don't know what they look like!!! all we know is that one is blonde and one is short! we're at a dead end! we're fucking stuck!!!"

bertholdt visibly flinches in his seat while his throat clogs up, hands gripping at the steering wheel. his eyes are welling up with tears that he doesn't let out. reiner's hand is on his arm in comfort, eyebrows bunched up in concern.

pieck wails once more, "god, i'm so sorry bertl. this isn't your fault. you were trying to help."

he sniffles, "it's fine. i understand. we're all just upset and desperate to find (name)."

"we'll find her soon enough."

————

the loneliness is getting to your head.

you're in the secluded dark even during the day.

you just crave to be with someone, so much that you're getting desperate.

a tug at erwin's sleeve has him stopping and turning back to face you. you've got tears spilling over your cheeks and snot running into your mouth while you lean on an elbow to hold onto his sleeve for dear life.

it's not even nighttime, it's early afternoon. erwin had just come into the room to feed you lunch and to just leave after that. but you couldn't handle it anymore. being alone made everything dark and silent.

even if the lights and televisions were turned on.

"please," you beg and rest your forehead against his arm, "please don't leave me alone."

erwin's cheeks are lighting up while his eyes widen. his hand comes up to stroke the back of your head as it now rests on his hip. he doesn't mind the wet spot forming on his pants, this was the first time you ever initiated anything.

"i won't, darling. i need to go put the tray in the sink and let levi know i will be in here," he's taking a step away from you, jumping at your sudden loud sobs and tugging.

"no! no! please, i don't want to be alone," your eyes are squeezed shut while you grip onto his pants for dear life.

"but i need to go put these dishes away. after that, i can—"

"no!" you scream and push your head harder against his leg, "no! please don't leave! i don't want you to leave."

he sighs, putting the tray of empty dish onto your bedside table. he grabs the room key out of back pocket before he picks you up bridal style.

"you run, levi'll break your legs," his fingers dig into your skin, but loosen at the frantic nod you give.

he manages to unlock your bedroom door in a complicated way, which you don't feel like questioning, and strolls outside of the room.

he goes out of your quarters, it's the furthest you've ever been. you're in a large room that connects into other rooms, the amount of doors is slightly overwhelming to you even as you look at them.

to your shock, you pass by people. living people.

they all seem to be staff, and the only sort of acknowledgement you get from them is a wide eyed stare with a dropped jaw.

"levi is still in his study, correct," he asks while shifting his hold on you.

a girl with ginger hair and auburn eyes speaks up, "yes sir! he requested no one to enter."

erwin nods and walks past the girl, who gives you a small friendly wave whenever you look out from erwin's arm.

you turn your attention back to erwin whenever you hear the sound of a door opening and closing.

you're in a new room, which is assumed to be levi's study, that's lighted up by the cloudy and grey natural light that shines through the blinds and windows. there are bookshelves on both sides of the room and you notice that on both bookshelves the order of the books goes from largest to smallest. levi sits at a desk in the middle of the room, facing the door, as his hand holding a pen runs across the paper.

"what do you need," levi looks up for a brief moment, but snaps his head up once more.

"what's the brat doing here," he motions to you in erwin's arms.

erwin's sitting you on a leather couch in the office, wiping away some tears with his thumbs. he steps away from you and takes ahold of levi by the arm, essentially dragging him to the door of the study.

the dawning realization that they're going to leave you alone has you tripping over your feet as you run to the door. your hand grips onto levi's shirt and you tug him towards you, pulling him away from the door.

"i don't want to be alone," you cry while shoving your face into levi's chest, he cringes at your snot and tears soaking through his shirt.

"oh," he blinks, awkwardly rubbing your back with his hand, "why'd you bring her here?"

"because she wouldn't let me leave to put her tray away, which i now need you to do. i'm going to get in the bath with her, which you are welcome to join if you'd like."

"i don't like baths, sitting in your own filth," he scrunches his nose up.

"to each their own," erwin shrugs, giving levi a kiss on his temple and grabbing ahold of your hand.

"come along, darling," he smiles at how quickly you intertwine fingers with him and join his side.

he leads you into a different bathroom than the one that you use. there's not much of a difference besides it size, the tub's size, and the long counter built for two.

"undress for me, love," his giant hands are massaging your shoulders before he pulls away and walks over to the tub.

you look to the bathroom door, only to find a doorknob with a keypad, something you didn't notice when you walked in, and frown. you just sigh and slip off the the pastel pink nightgown you were wearing, the fabric pooling around your feet as it drops to the floor.

you look up into the mirror, and you almost want to cry. you look nothing like yourself. you barely had any life behind those (eye color) eyes and your eyebrows were now naturally furrowed in sadness. you've got fading bruises on one side of your body, trailing downwards all the way to your calf.

you decide to take off your panties before you let your thoughts roam, stepping out of them after they've dropped to the floor.

you hear the door open, to which you and erwin look to. only it's not levi.

it's a young boy with ebony black hair and emerald green eyes that stands at 5'10.

you instinctively cover yourself up and turn your back towards him, embarrassing washing over you in waves.

erwin scrambles to block the boys view, who is seemingly enjoying it, and furrows his bushy brows.

"who are you and what are you doing here? where is levi?!"

"levi sent me sir. he gave me clothing for the girl and then said you would be in here," his eyes try to take a peek over erwin's shoulder.

erwin snatches the clothing out of his hand and slams the door shut in the boy's face. he scoffs in annoyance while he puts the clothes onto the counter, now focusing his attention onto you.

"i'm sorry about that, dear. are you alright," he puts a hand on your back and guides you to his chest.

"i'm okay," you sniff, "just wanna get in the bath now."

he smiles a bit, leaving a sweet kiss on your forehead before he steps away. you watch him rid himself of his white button up and try not to let your eyes bulge out at his body. however, you can't exactly resist the urge whenever erwin is finally naked.

erwin's stomach has abs carved into it, a well groomed happy trail leading to his cock. the thighs in his muscles and back are almost screaming out at you whenever he turns and lifts his hand to ruffle his hair.

you look down to his feet, feeling ashamed for even staring for so long.

he gets into the bath after a moment, knees spread wide for you to sit between. his arms are resting on the rim of the tub while he sighs at the hot temperature. you get in, goosebumps running up and down your body as the heat invades your colder body. you settle in between his legs and lean back against his chest, closing your eyes.

his arms wrap around you, pulling you closer to him than you were before. you put a hand over his arm, silently giving him a message to keep his arms where they were.

his lips kiss at the crown of your head, and it seems sweet enough to where you think you might be able to smile. but you don't.

watching your eyes flutter, he mumbles into your hair, "the hot water make you tired?"

"yeah," you hum, "don't really like the hot outside of this. i prefer the cold."

"so does levi," erwin chuckles as he draws circles into your skin.

"does that mean you like summer?"

"no, i prefer fall or spring. both usually have the adequate temperature," he sighs.

"erwin," you ask after a few seconds, "why is levi so cold?"

"why are you only now asking?"

"i meant to ask sooner but i was never really... given the chance," you say bitterly.

"well, levi has been through a tough life. he almost went to jail before i met him. but it isn't my story to tell," he smiles at the memory.

you nod and finally let out a yawn, "i'm going to fall asleep soon."

from then, erwin washes the two of you so you both can get out of the bath. during this, you find out he's actually quite playful. he gathers up bubbly soap in his hands and blows them into your face, hearty laughs following immediately after.

he stands before you once you're out of the tub, wrapping a towel around his waist and one around your shoulders. you look up at him while he brushes your hair and puts on a few drops of lotion on your face.

you're trying to ignore the voice in the back of your head that maybe he really does care. because at the end of the day,

you still have a collar and chain on.

[miniwolfsbane]

Sweet Tooth S1 thoughts (BIG SPOILERS)

First off, I am disappointed we were shown a PURRING PUPPY BABY in the trailer and had 0 follow up with it? Did he/she escape to Istanbul with it’s parents? Get captured? Live a nomadic life? Live in the forest? I WANT ANSWERS!! :( Also, puppies don’t purr, so I want answers to that too. Unless they were trying to go for a whimper or an animal noise and just went with that instead.

BIG SPOILERS under the cut

Anyway, the only two things, aside from the bits of gore and violence (Reviews are all like “IT’S A FAMILY SHOW!” And I counter back with “I would not let any child under 13 watch this and I have never seen a family show with three seconds of guts being removed and two scenes of implied, live vivisecting on sentient beings without anesthetic.”), the only things I didn’t like about this were using 2 overused cliche’s. One being the hero hanging off a bridge for what seems like 12 years above peril, and the other I can’t remember. It was Jeppard nearly missing the train. The only thing that saved it was the flashback.

The other thing was that, while dark, there’s a bit of predictably and not much depth to the story. I realized last night that the comic source material my have the depth I’m craving out of the story. Just because it has child actors doesn’t mean the story can’t be dug into deeper and have more meaning. I applaud them for what they did and how they handled it, mixing in human-ish vivisecting with neighbors burning down their friends houses and being murderous hypocrites into a story about children, but it wasn’t enough for me. I wanted more.  Edit: Not more violence, obviously, just more to the story. dig into the universe, hard. Like gardening, just shove both metaphorical hands into that story soil and root around in it. Find all the gems that are the interesting parts of this universe and answer our questions. 

Sadly, I see someone on tumblr called it...something. Like, were we even watching the same show?? A multi-racial cast that gives all it’s characters dignity isn’t...that.

Bobby isn’t creepy to most and not shown that much. If you really think Bobby is that creepy, you need to go see original Bobby and get back to me. https://www.bing.com/images/search?view=detailV2&ccid=mv4YBZHa&id=071BD6BDAA183CA5965247E7F8F68E873375399B&thid=OIP.mv4YBZHau8dTzxGoK0L0ggHaHD&mediaurl=https%3A%2F%2Fvignette.wikia.nocookie.net%2Fmarvel_dc%2Fimages%2Ff%2Ffc%2FBobby_Sweet_Tooth_001.jpg%2Frevision%2Flatest%3Fcb%3D20150813115735&cdnurl=https%3A%2F%2Fth.bing.com%2Fth%2Fid%2FR9afe180591dabbc753cf11a82b42f482%3Frik%3Dmzl1M4eO9vjnRw&pid=ImgRaw&exph=616&expw=647&q=sweet+tooth+comics+bobby&simid=608026455638091252&ck=7A4DBACCF6BFE43E3B1E799F7F88C55A&selectedindex=0&adlt=demote&shtp=GetUrl&shid=3fb5000d-4d63-494a-986d-006fedeb28d5&shtk=Qm9iYnkgKFN3ZWV0IFRvb3RoKSB8IERDIERhdGFiYXNlIHwgRmFuZG9t&shdk=Rm91bmQgb24gQmluZyBmcm9tIGRjLmZhbmRvbS5jb20%3D&shhk=NjRWN4Jv1KDrxu8T30I3UN0IQ71oVtCAEnsLIeSmFl4%3D&form=EX0023&shth=OSH.nyb0RMh%252Bnm%252B%252B%252FIH1cnkhHw

Okay, kid does sorta look like a gremlin mixed with a Furby in the show, like one post said, but I’ve seen worse. https://www.bing.com/images/search?view=detailV2&ccid=F9mlBjUo&id=49C0257935E4A941563E579C7E9DCF48B72BEC01&thid=OIF.eyTVbAuEqt0R%2bKFmrIK4gA&mediaurl=https%3a%2f%2fepipoca.com.br%2fwp-content%2fuploads%2f2021%2f06%2fE3NUK2kVoAE5Ct_.jpg&cdnurl=https%3a%2f%2fth.bing.com%2fth%2fid%2fR17d9a5063528805f1ade0ea77464df86%3frik%3d%26pid%3dImgRaw&exph=675&expw=1482&q=sweet+tooth++Bobby&simid=297111136187&ck=7B24D56C0B84AADD11F8A166AC82B880&selectedIndex=49&FORM=IRPRST&ajaxhist=0&ajaxserp=0

Sometimes stuff goes over my head. I had no idea that the babies were being born and not made in a lab. When they showed them in the maternity ward, I genuinely thought they had been experimented on and didn’t come out of the womb like that. Apparently I missed that it was a maternity ward in a hospital. That’s my other problem with this show I forgot to mention: It defies logic and you really have to turn off your brain to accept the hybrid concept. I’m guessing the virus or other means (possibly according to the comics, I tried to avoid big spoilers), mutated them in utero. That still doesn’t satisfy me. Thankfully, Gus was somehow lab created, so that helps. (More information and context would be appreciated. Was it, like, they were experimenting with in-vitro or what?) Edit: This article https://screenrant.com/sweet-tooth-theory-purple-flowers-cure-sick-virus/ explains that putting the virus in a chicken egg produced Gus. Which makes even less sense. Edit: This MAY or MAY NOT be right. Someone on YT pointed out they never said this in the show.

 IRL, Virus + chicken embryo=would never randomly produce a human/deer hybrid baby. It’s so freaking random it sounds like nonsense or the delusions of a madman, not a rational comic book author with a presumably sane mind. Just...I’ve said it before...things have to make sense, even in fiction. 5 step process of anything cannot equal random result. It goes against all science, right? And made up worlds have to have rules, even silly worlds. Like I said, you have to turn your brain off, but this stretches even my disbelief. Hybrids, I get, fine, but that? I’m sorry, what? *headdesk* I don’t know, maybe the comics had something I’m missing since I never read them.

I’m eager to learn the connection to the kids and the virus as we go. And if we don’t get a season 2, I’ll be getting the comics to satisfy my thirst for this show.

Gus is my baby and I don’t understand how a kid could be that cute. Jeppard is the GOAT (lol) Bear could use better line delivery at times, but her acting will improve I’m sure. Nice to see Diana Ramierez acting again, her character is likeable. Wendy is cute, but kinda just there for me. Needs more traits or character development to get on my favorite characters list. Bear also needs more than just backstory and a tough girl persona. She’s not bland, she just needs more spark to her as a character. More personality, if that makes sense. 

Lastly, I wanted a tiny bit more from the make-up department. Wendy and rabbit kids (yes, I took note of this detail and I love bunnies) make-up is on point, but the rest look like kids dressed up in dollar store feathers and fur for a school play. Get more creative if you’re gonna show these hybrids, even if it’s just for a few seconds. You have the budget!! (But I think most of that went to Bobby’s puppetry/CGI and Jeppard’s baby, to be honest.)

I wanted a cat girl or boy, because the lulz for the anime community (Also, because I have 2 cats and stuff), but at least we got bird kids, even if they weren’t cockatiels like mine. I’m ready for Season 2, hurry Netflix!!

I can see why people wouldn’t like this show or wouldn’t recommend watching it, but I see many have embraced it. It’s either you’re thing or it’s not, but you should give it a chance and see. Just don’t shoot it down if you hate it, there’s enough wet blankets out there and we all have different tastes.

Edit: One last thing. I do have a problem with hybrids being half-human. Like, you would think that being half-human, they’d still have all the problems humans have with causing wars and all. I know it’s a dark story with a good outcome, but there’s something too saccharine about hybrids having “The best parts of us.” What exactly are those best parts? Last I checked, humans are selfish and vain at their core. Even the most altruistic, giving person can be greedy about something or want more. It’s like Genie said in the new Aladdin, “You can have all the money and power in the world and it still won’t be enough”.  Wouldn’t bird people and pig people and deer people all want to side with each other instead of living in some grand utopia? Fighting over land and resources? Portraying hybrids as taking over the earth after people are gone from extinction and everything going peachy doesn’t quite work for me. Not that I’d want it to still be dark, but, eh, they’d have to have SOME problems, wouldn’t they?

[sevlgi]

the special one

requested: yes

group: mamamoo

pairing: moonbyul x fem!reader

genre: fluff, angst

contents: vampire!moonbyul, bartender!reader

warnings: blood, weapons, vampires

synopsis: Moonbyul was always used to getting her way. So encountering an entire bar warned against her powers, and led by a surprisingly feisty human, wasn’t exactly on her bucket list.

a/n: lowkey wanted to wait for byul’s birthday to post this but i couldn’t wait :D enjoy!!

word count: 3.3k

As soon as she stepped into the bar, Byulyi could smell the thing she had been craving for the past month. Well, two things: blood, and some good alcohol.

She paid no mind to the hands grabbing at her as she slid through the crowd, skillfully evading being pulled into a dance circle by a group of admittedly pretty girls. Sure, they were easy targets for feeding, but there needed to be some alcohol in her system before she dealt with horny foreigners.

“A bottle of your finest soju, please.”

She smiled at the waiter who turned around, a girl probably barely 20 years old. A perfect target, then- someone who didn’t know the kinds of creatures that frequented the darker bars of Seoul.

It wasn’t even an egotistical thing to say that no one had been able to resist the allure of Byulyi’s gaze for centuries, and she never expected an almost teenaged girl to be the one to break that record. To her surprise, the kid looked down instantly, voice sounding odd as she polished the glass in her hands. “One second, ma’am.”

Pursing her crimson-stained lips, the vampire checked her clothing for the unlikely chance of bloodstains on the black fabric. Maybe it was the dark smeared eye makeup? But usually, all her looks did was draw more people in, even without using the power behind her eyes...

“Another one of you, eh?”

When her eyes shifted over to the staff door that the boy had entered, she found a defiant gaze, eyebrows cocked and hip jutting to one side. Unlike the earlier bartender, you stared right into her eyes without a change to your expression, no lust or euphoria seeping into cold irises. “I’m sorry, you are?” Byulyi asked, sending you a small smile. 

You remained unimpressed, flinging a dishrag onto the bar counter as you slammed your hands down onto the stone and leaned in closer. In close proximity, you were interestingly beautiful, the lack of sympathy attractive in some twisted way. “Y/N. Manager, and a strong hater of you vampires. See yourself out.”

The short-haired woman shrugged, leaning back in the barstool and crossing her arms. “I don’t think I will, manager. Tell me, did you train the kid how to recognize people like me?”

Taking a good look at the points of Byulyi’s nails and the glint to her teeth, you evidently decided not to fight her, gritting your teeth instead as you matched her stance. “Ryujin’s smart. She isn’t as strong as me, maybe, but she knows enough to not be caught in your trap.”

Every word spat out of your mouth sounds like a barbed and poisoned insult aimed right at the vampire’s heart, but they make no impact on stone skin. Still smiling, Byulyi waved a hand at the alcohol littering the bar. “Well, since you know not to fight me, how about that soju?”

You bristled at being ordered to do something, but set an ice-cold bottle of the soju down on the counter. “The most expensive in the house,” you hissed, shoving it over at her. “And you’re going to have to pay. No one else is coming to serve you tonight, now that I know what you are.”

“See you soon, manager,” she saluted, cracking the soju open with a simple flick of her wrist. Even if nothing else resulted from the night, she’d found another first.

You were going to be the first person that Byulyi won over by herself, without the influence of any powers whatsoever. And yes, she would win you over somehow. Eventually.

At first, Byulyi had been confused by the vendetta you seemed to have against vampires. It was true that she didn’t fit in with the clan system that most vampires in the city (or world) tended to adopt, but she didn’t think that anyone could be bad enough to make you quite so wary.

And it just so happened that the next time she dared to visit your bar, you were dealing with the difficult ones.

“I told you that we don’t allow vamps for a reason,” you scowled, eyes flicking between those of the five girls who stood with their arms crossed before you. “I may not be able to control you, but I sure as hell won’t let you feed on innocents.”

Irene exchanged a glance with Joy, who was just about to step forward when another voice interrupted the conversation. “Hey. Are you giving the manager trouble?”

You glared at Byulyi as well, though there wasn’t the venom that you directed at the clan. “Rogue. You’re going against us?” Seulgi asked, head cocked to a side. “Isn’t it in your best interest too to get rid of this... human?”

Strolling forward with her hands in the pockets of her pants, Byulyi sighed. “Look, manager here is stronger than you think. And if I want to remain in her best interests, be able to come to this bar sometimes, I’ll do what she asks. Including throwing you out.”

Despite the numbers of the clan, there was no possible way any of the five could match up to Byulyi’s sheer experience. She wasn’t violent compared to some, but she could certainly hold her own in a fight. You were silent behind the bar, but the stare you directed at the clan spoke volumes.

“Fine,” Yeri rolled her eyes, lips pinching together. “Come on. Survive another day, right?”

As they filed out of the bar, Byulyi’s eyes remained on them until the door swung shut. “You didn’t have to do that,” you said with your back turned, hands scrubbing at a bottle for no reason.

“Don’t worry, it was fun,” she grinned, sliding onto the barstool. “Is this why you dislike us vamps? Not all of us are like them, you know.”

You turned just to send her a half-hearted glare. “No, that’s not why. I always- I never liked you undead things, and being immune to your powers doesn’t help anything. But hoity-toity ones like them make it worse.”

The vampire leaned her chin on her hand, watching you work. The reddish glare of the bar’s lights only made the column of your throat look more inviting, but Byulyi wasn’t reckless enough to attack someone capable of resisting her. Besides, you were an interesting one. “I see. Well, if anyone tries to mess with you again, you call me,” she jested, smiling wider when you scoffed.

“Sure.” But contrasting your cold words, you slid a bottle of soju over to her, the same flavor that she’d liked best the last time. “On the house this time. But I don’t owe you anything after this,” you warned.

“Come on, a bottle of soju isn’t enough,” Byulyi pouted, laughing when you scrunched your nose. “You owe me a favor. I’m responsible, promise, I won’t ask for your blood or anything.”

You hesitated before agreeing, but finally allowed her to shake your hand. “Fine. A favor- geez, your hands are cold.”

She stared down at the pale skin once you had jerked away, a slight warmth from your human hands lingering. “I guess. I mean, I’m dead, what do you expect?”

“Dead, huh?” You almost look sympathetic for once, pouring out some soju for the both of you. “What’s that like?”

Byulyi raised an eyebrow as she clinked her glass against yours. “Being dead? Well, I don’t remember that. But now, it’s similar to being alive. My heart still beats, if that’s what you’re wondering. That’s what makes it hard for people to realize that we aren’t human too.”

“It still beats?” you frowned, scrunching your entire face at the taste of alcohol burning the back of your throat. “I always hear differently.”

She reached out for your hand, holding on loosely when you allowed her to hold it. “Come on, feel.”

You exhaled sharply when you felt the pounding at the pulsepoint of Byulyi’s neck, leaning in closer as if that’d allow you to hear it, too. When you looked down, though, you realized the position you were in. “If anyone looked at us, they’d think I was the vampire.”

“You’re right, aren’t you?” she smiled, only tilting her head more to expose her neck to you. “You could kill me right now.”

“Aren’t you already dead?” You bent down under the counter to hide the heat in your cheeks, your fingertips icy just from a couple seconds of contact. “How would I kill you?”

The vampire shrugged, “Wooden stake works on the weaker ones. Holy water, if you had any, but that one takes a lot to kill. For us older ones, the only thing that works is a sacred bullet; hard to come by for you humans, which is why you don’t know about it.”

Frowning, you looked over from the vault of good alcohol stored under the bar. “Huh. What else is fake?”

Byulyi scrunched her nose, looking remarkably like a cute and harmless hamster in a slightly bloodstained black outfit when she did. She was almost charming when she pondered your question, tapping blunt fingernails against her chin. “The mirror thing is, my friend Yongsun spends hours staring at herself. So’s the garlic allergy. I like garlic.”

“Good to know,” you chuckled when you stood up again. “Enjoy your soju, Byulyi  .”

She ghosted her own hands over your fingerprints marring the frosted glass of the alcohol bottle, bringing the entire thing to her lips. “I will.”

Seulgi’s grip was iron tight as she pulled your head back by your hair, your wrists straining against the duct tape holding them together as your scalp screamed. “I’ll ask you again. Where is she?”

Ryujin’s eyes were nothing short of terrified over the tape clamping over her mouth, but you remained firm with your chin jutting out. “I. Don’t. Know. I don’t serve vampires, and I don’t protect them.”

Scoffing, Irene scraped a fingernail against your cheek, the skin tearing under the serrated tip. “Don’t lie. She saved you from us last time, and Byulyi doesn’t risk her rogue status for just anyone.”

Glancing up at the ceiling, or the floor of your actual bar, Wendy mused, “I wonder if she’d hear you scream. If you mean so much to her, what would she give to save you?”

You sighed, going limp just to shake your head. “I told you. Byulyi protected me out of spite against you, not because she gives a shit about me. And I won’t scream. You can kill me in peace, as soon as you--”

Crashing into Wendy, the door to the basement slammed open with a kick from the very person you claimed to not give a shit about you. Byulyi finally looked like the vampire you feared her to be from the start, dark eyes ablaze with something that quite honestly frightened you. Her dark clothing swirled around her in the dusty air, pale brown hair glinting gold as her own nails cut the bonds holding Ryujin. “Go.”

She ran as told, too fast for Yeri’s claws to grasp onto the hem of her work jacket. “So it worked,” Joy smiled, cocking the slightly rusty pistol in her hand. Sacred bullet, you remembered, struggling more against your bonds when you realized what that bullet could do to the vampire glaring daggers at her opponents. “Stupid of you.”

In a sudden burst of strength, the duct tape ripped and you surged up, feeling at least a couple locks of hair remain in Seulgi’s fist. But in that rush, you tackled the tallest girl in the room, all breath knocked out of your lungs at the impact.

Scrambling for the gun, you screamed out at the feeling of sharp points sinking into your arm, hand faltering. “Let go--”

A harsh crack sounded by your ear when Byulyi’s foot stomped down on Joy’s ribs, her fangs pulling out just as your fingers closed around the gun. You panted as you twisted, blood dripping from your arm onto your face as you pressed the stone cold barrel into the girl’s pretty face. “Stand up,” you breathed, hands shaking as she eyed you. “Stand.”

The other four in her clan circled around you; despite the fact that you had no clue whatsoever about how to handle the weapon in your hands, you hoped that the fierce expression on your face was enough to convince them. Byulyi’s hand was surprisingly gentle on your shoulder, as was the expression on her face when she smiled at you. “Well. I believe you know what the blessed bullet in this gun does, and I’m sure you know better than to fight me on this.”

Irene hissed, fangs glistening under the dim lighting of the basement, “You don’t have Yongsun with you right now. What makes you think we can’t kill you, and your pretty human girlfriend too?”

Byulyi’s lips curved up in a smile as the cocking of another gun sounded by the basement door, Ryujin’s brow furrowed as she aimed. “Unlike this one, which I bet you only loaded one bullet into, that pistol over there has 4 bullets, straight from the hands of a priest,” the vampire explained with her hands behind her back. “More than enough to kill all of you, if I don’t get to you first.”

Yeri was already tugging at the wrist of Wendy, who stared futilely at the gun still pressed into Joy’s neck. Finally, Seulgi spoke up with a wavering voice, Irene not bothering to dispute as she asked, “What do you want? Money?”

“I want you to stay away from this bar, and with it, Y/N,” Byulyi gestured, deep voice smooth as she turned to you, sending a greasy wink that you rolled your eyes at. “And I’ll be telling all the other clans about this... incident. Sound fair?”

You breathed out a shallow sigh of relief when Irene nodded tentatively. “Good. Then get out, and don’t expect the pistol back,” you warned, waving Ryujin to get out of the stairway. “I don’t ever want to see your faces again.”

“I can’t thank you enough.”

Byulyi shrugged, clinking sojus with a grin on her face. She looked positively delighted, though she wasn’t the one with bite marks on her arm and a scrape on her cheekbone. “No need to. It was fun.”

“Fun?” you scoffed, downing the alcohol. “I wouldn’t call it that. But seriously, what do you want in return? That’s two favors I owe you now.”

“Is it?” she blinked. “I wasn’t keeping track.”

Looking out over the bar, you smiled at the sight of a vampire-free crowd, customers downing Ryujin’s specialty drinks as music boomed in LED speakers. “Yeah. Two favors. You better think fast, vampy.”

“There is one thing in mind.”

You raised an eyebrow and looked back over, head tilting when you realized that Byulyi wasn’t staring back like she usually did. “Yeah? What’s up?”

She cleared her throat suddenly, though you were sure that alcohol didn’t burn her like it did you. “I don’t want to use the favors for this, since I think that’d be immoral, but I... I want to be closer to you.”

Flicking your hand in the air between the two of you, you clarified, “What’s that mean? You wanna be friends? You wanna sit closer to me? Or sex--”

“No!” She held her hands out in front of her; to your satisfaction, you were sure that she’d be blushing if she was capable of it. “I may feel something for you. Not sexual, but something that I haven’t felt in a while. If I can, I’d like to use both my favors to call you my... girlfriend. Is that the term you use these days?”

“A girlfriend?” you laughed, shaking your head as you leaned forward in your chair. “That’s great and all, but you’ve barely known me for a month.”

Despite being a (not-so) human being, Byulyi visibly deflated. Without realizing it, your hand shot out and settled on her knee, thumb caressing the rough material of her jeans. “Okay. Then how about this: I will be your girlfriend. But it’ll be probational, like our alliance. As soon as you do something to piss me off, which I’m sure will be soon, I’ll decide if it’ll continue.”

She grinned, nose scrunching up as she offered you a toast. “Sounds perfect to me.”

The clink of the glass bottles was the chime of bells ringing in a new chapter, clear over the drunk energies of the night. Not wedding bells, of course- that wouldn’t happen for a good hundred more years. 

[thesmokingguns]

Wendy and The Lost Boys Chapter 12 - FINAL

Warning: Drug use and Sex so please 18+

Note: Thank you to everyone who read this. It means a lot. I need some ideas for what to write next so if you have a request I would love to hear it! Thanks everyone !

It felt stupid to be this happy. Yet everyday he felt like he had won the lottery. Sasha was always doing things to make his day. It didn’t have to be anything big but just the small things she added to his life were improving Nikki’s outlook. They had spent the last three months together pretty much nonstop, getting into a routine together. Nikki liked waking up and having Sasha in bed with him or finding her in the kitchen reading books on the counter drinking coffee. He loved when he’d come home after a long day she’d be greeted with her jumping into his arms to kiss him. He loved their baths together where they’d lay together listening to a record and smoking cigarettes until Nikki would need to flip it to the B side.

Sasha took care of him. She always made sure that he had clean clothes to wear and that there was food in the fridge. There were always little love notes around if she left before him to give him a rundown of what his day looked like. She made him laugh with her quirky ways and had him remembering how easy things could be. Nikki had learned what it was like to be loved by being with her. Gone were the fears of him having to be this rockstar with some sort of persona he had to fit; she was right there going out with him most nights. The nights that she didn’t go out he knew what he had at home and nothing was really worth losing that.

But now things were about to change in the little house they had set up because the guys had just gotten a break to open up on tour for Kiss.

Nikki frowned looking  at his watch. She was running fifteen minutes late on the worst possible day to be late. They were supposed to go see Bad Brains at the Whisky tonight before the tour and he was looking forward to the show. All of a sudden he saw her sprint towards the car, waving frantically as she ran in her Jean shorts and Keds, a Crüe shirt Nikki had cut up for her swinging in the breeze. Her hair and makeup were already done and that cherry red smile was driving Nikki crazy as it shone across the parking lot. She was jumping into his arms and playing the merry fool he was spinning her, pressing his lips to hers in a heated kiss.  Sasha smiled being set on her feet.

“I got ready here so I won’t need to go home. So don’t look so stressed out about the time.” She knew him too well. Her finger wiped at his bottom lip and she was slipping inside his Porsche, pushing her school bag into the backseat. He hadn't expected her to be ready and a sense of relief washed over him knowing they had saved an hour he had planned for.

“What are we going to do with all the time we have?” He asked, driving them towards the Strip. She leaned across kissing the side of his mouth having a few ideas of what they could be doing together. He was tense under her touch and she could see the wheels spinning in his mind, “Are you going to be okay?” He felt her squeeze his bicep and her head on his shoulder. He wouldn’t be gone for that long from her. Especially since she would be going to Irving tomorrow with him and taking the bus to LA where she would be dropped off in LA for four days with Nikki going to Phoenix and then Las Vegas. She was fine with him coming home after all the dates but he had asked her to come see them in Vegas because they had some new songs he wanted her to hear them play for the first time.

“Are you going to be okay without me?” She shot back, he tensed as they stopped at a red light. He could turn and give her attention now. Sasha couldn’t believe  how serious his face was about everything and she really did worry if he was going to be okay, “It’s only a few days, Sixx. What the hell are you going to do when you’re touring Europe?” She teased. Nikki was holding her face in his hands.

“I’m going to play shows at night and during the day when I’m hungover I’m going to take you around to see everything.” He loved the way she smiled at that. He believed that’s really what they would do together. A loud beep behind them broke up the moment they were sharing together. Nikki gave a glare to the person behind them before driving forward, his  hand on her thigh, “As long as you want to be with me I’m going to make sure that you’re along for the ride. I want to make sure you get to be here because you’re the one for me, angel.” It was easy to get lost in his words. Even though they hadn't said it yet it was obvious they both were in love with each other.

He watched her at the bar, her easy laughter with their friends and the way she was sipping on her beer occasionally throwing looks his way. She was so easy to get along with and he could see how a group of people could always be drawn to her. He watched her pull out a cigarette, her favorite party trick, and the amount of lighters reaching out before she even had it to her mouth made him shake his head. There was this agreement around them about jealousy and people. They both knew there were always going to be people around both of them and they had made sure to talk about what expectations were around that. If they came together they would leave together and they both knew that. Nikki sipped the bourbon looking away from her for a second to talk to someone. When he went to go check on her at the bar again she was gone.

Laughter and chatter filled the women's room. Girls pushed shoulders gently applying lipstick and helping girls fix their hair. The comradery of a women's bathroom was one of the best parts of shows. Sasha finished brightening up her lipstick, fluffing out her hair, turning to pull her shorts up higher to give even more of her ass to hang out the bottom. Her eyes caught sight of girls doing lines and her body suddenly craved the white powder. Tommy hadn’t ratted her out to Nikki about the cocaine she had been using before moving in and to her credit she had quit well she had been with him. Even though he would party she knew the way that he worried about her and it would be an issue.

“Do you want a bump?” the girl was holding out a red glass vile, smiling at her. Sasha chewed her lip, feeling her skin suddenly burning wanting it. She held out the side of her hand letting the laughing girl tap out the white powder in a small line. Before she realized what she was doing she had her nose sniffing across her finger, her whole body coming alive. She shook her head, smiling as she licked her finger to get any trace of the drug off.

“Oh fuck.” she rubbed her neck and laughed along with the girls, her heart racing as one of them dragged her out of the bathroom. Since she had gone to school and had gotten sorority sisters it had become so fun for her to have a group of girlfriends around at all times. Even if they were just strangers from the bathroom.

The group of girls had been drinking at the bar, the loud laughter as they shut out guys trying to walk up to them. Sasha, who was usually blossoming with confidence, was even more high on the attention. She leaned over the bar smiling down at the bartender and waving him over.

“Frankie, can I have the whole bottle of vodka? Please?” she put on her pouty face and when he tried to look up, probably trying to see where Nikki was so he could reel in his girlfriend, she grabbed his face, “My eyes are right here.” the girls in the group all were teetering and when the man sighed giving her the bottle she smiled her award winning smile. “Are you girls ready to have some fun?” she asked, tilting the bottle into her mouth.

Sasha was climbing up on the bar, stepping over drinks and dancing along to the music. A few of the girls had followed her up onto the wood space but weren’t casually using the space as their own dance runway. Whenever someone would complain she’d bend down, tilting their head back as she poured vodka into their mouths. Nikki spotted her and thought she was absolutely wrecked. He was pushing through the crowd wondering how in the half hour he lost her she had gotten this wasted. He watched her pour vodka into her mouth guzzling it down in a way that would make Mick proud.

“Angel.” she heard her nickname and turned quickly, bending down to where the bassist was at the corner of the bar. She tried to pour the bottle down his throat but he quickly took it from her, handing it back to the man tending bar. Watching with a slight smirk as she gave him this little pout. “I think it’s time to go.” she gave him a look and he saw her bloodshot eyes. Obviously she had drank way more than he had given her credit for. She placed her hands on his shoulders letting him lift her down off the bar. Sasha knew better than to fight to stay out. If he was ready to go home that’s where they would be going.

It was quiet as they walked back to the car and she was worried that he was mad at her. Even though Nikki had her wrapped up in his arms the silence gave her a little bit of worry. She ran her hand down his arm, resting her head against him as they walked.

“Are you mad at me?” she asked, finally getting the courage to speak. She heard the rumbling of a chuckle and looked up to see his amused face looking down at her. Nikki held her face in his hands leaning down to kiss her . The fear she had melted away from this action.

“I love how fun you are.” he eased her fears with his words and she felt better knowing that she wasn’t on his bad side. “Now, cmon, angel. If we’re leaving early I’m going to take advantage of the time that I had with you.” The smile was over both their faces as they went to the Porsche and headed home.

Tommy’s eyes narrowed, his gaze on Sasha who seemed a little flustered as the drummer of Kiss pinned her in the corner. Her usual cool demeanor changed as her eyes shifted around the room, trying to look past the man. When her eyes landed on him,, Tommy was pushing through the crowd, trying to find NIkki in the chaos backstage but needing to get to her. She reached out a hand when he was close letting Tommy yank her away from Eric. The man turned, stunned to see him giving her a once over. The way her eyes were looking made him know that she was shaken up.

“Hey man, aren’t you guys supposed to go on?” Tommy swore, he was right. He couldn’t find Nikki because he had probably already grabbed his bass and headed towards the stage. He grabbed Sasha bringing her to the side of the stage. He could see the way she was looking behind her, hugging Nikki’s jacket together around her. She was uncomfortable and had nervous energy radiating off of her.

“Listen, stand right fucking here. And if that creep comes near you, you just step onto stage. Don’t let him get you alone. I’ll deal with the prick.” He looked up at the guys on stage and sighed rushing out.

It was only the second show of the tour and Sasha already wasn’t sure if she was cut out for being on the road. As much as she loved seeing the band play and partying it was like being at a restaurant and she was the main course. Nikki was shooting glances at her from the stage. He had seen the way Tommy had placed her and had a feeling like something wasn’t right. He looked at Sasha again, smirking when he saw her singing along to the songs he had written. She was wrapped up in his jacket, covering up the tight black dress. He wished it would always be like this, the feeling of being on the stage with so many people singing his music and the cherry on top was having his girl there.

“Got ya.” The hands on her hip made her jump, her heart sinking as she realized that she had let her guard down again. She was being jerked back, her eyes leaving Nikki who had just been looking at her a second before. Her eyes went to Tommy who was slamming the drums so hard he couldn’t pay attention to her, “I’ve heard stories about the band and how they share their girls. I’m sure you wouldn’t mind helping me out.” He was pressing her hand against him as she tried to yank away. “Don’t play hard to get, sugar. I’m not into that shit.” He was pulling her towards the dressing room and Sasha was thinking if she should scream. Her eyes looked around and the last thing she wanted to do was fuck that up for them.

“Let me go.” She hissed through gritted teeth. She was trying to tear away from him but this just made the drummer hold her wrist tighter.

“I’ve warned you once.” He was by her ear, hissing in annoyance, “We only have twenty minutes before I have to go on and I want those pretty lips wrapped around my fat cock.” Sasha slammed her heel down on his foot, the spike literally piercing the boot and causing him to scream out, his hand loosened and she was kicking off her shoes running back to the main area backstage. “YOU FUCKING BITCH!” She saw the guys coming off stage and rushed over practically knocking Nikki over as she jumped into his arms.

“Hey , Angel, you disappeared for a few minutes there.” He was sweaty from the stage but he held the girl close, kissing her as she looked up at him with her wild blue eyes.

“I wasn’t done with you, sugar.” A hand was grabbing her forearm and Nikki moved her behind him stepping towards the Kiss drummer.

“What the fuck do you think you’re doing?” Nikki growled, he didn’t know who the duck this guy thought he was putting hands on his girl. He could see T-bone walking up next to him and realized now why the drummer was late to get on stage.

“Listen man, it’s your life. We all share.” Nikki felt his eyebrows furrow together. It was so easy for this guy to talk about his girl like that and he did not like that, “You can’t bring your groupie girlfriend to shows and not expect to have to share her with everyone.” Tommy was stepping up now. Touching Sasha’s shoulder to let her know it was okay before saying anything.

“That’s my fucking sister, asshole.” He realized now that he had really messed with the wrong girl.

“And that’s my girlfriend. If you touch her, fuck, if you even look at her again I’ll break your hands so you never play drums again.” Nikki warned. He turned looking at Sasha who was nervous. “Cmon, Angel.” She let him tuck her into his side as they left the building. Nikki got her into the bus and turned pulling her into his arms tightly. “Are you okay?” He whispered into her hair. His heart was pounding and all that he could think about was he was going to be leaving her for a few days alone.

“I’m fine. Nothing happened. That guys just a dickhead. You’re crushing me though.” She added poking her head out and looking up at him with a reassuring smile. He had such a serious look, a frown etched on his face. “Nikki, stop worrying about me. I’m going to be fine. I’m going to drive your car too fast, go out every night with the girls, do tons of drugs, and maybe even do amateur night at the Seventh Veil to pay the rent.” She teased him.

“If you do amateur night I want to be there.” He smiled, picking her up and moving towards his bunk. “Why don’t you help me break in the bunk and we can say our goodbyes properly?” He laid her on the bunk pulling the curtain closed behind them. “We don’t have a lot of time, angel, so let me have you. You’ve been taking your pills like a good girl, right?” he watched the way she blushes when he calls her a good girl but Nikki has realized his girlfriend is quite submissive and likes it when he talks to her like this. She nods her head and he smiles, stroking her cheek.

Sasha is shimmying out of his jacket trying to maneuver in the small space. The jacket is off and Nikki is pulling up the short dress, moaning with approval as he sees her bare pussy. Before she can think he’s running two fingers along her wetness, pushing into her core without warning and coming out covered in her honey. He’s licking hungirly, tasting her on his fingertips.

“We don’t have long.” she warned him because she can see Nikki getting carried away with all the things that he wanted to do with her. His eyes flash to hers and for a second she thinks he’s going to warn her not to rush him but instead he nodded his head. His fingers unlacing his pants.

“I’m going to take you hard and fast, Angel. You’re going to be sore tomorrow but I want you to ache for me.” she nods her head as he moves over her. Sasha reaches up, pulling him down into a kiss, tasting him. The cigarettes and whiskey overwhelmed his senses. Nikki is pushing into her, the thickness of him stretching her as her body molds to him.

“Fuck, Daddy.” he pulls away, this devilish smirk on his face hearing her call him this new nickname. Her eyes are fluttered half closed as he’s moving himself into her. HIs hands grip her hips making it so she can’t move an inch. She was always loud during sex but Nikki is kissing her now because he’s sure that if there are fans outside the bus they can hear her. He wants more of her and is ripping down the front of her dress, watching as her tits bounce as his body slams into hers. He’s never this rough with her but it’s very apparent that she’s loving it. Her wetness is slipping out of her body onto the sheets. He’s going to smell her every day he’s gone.

His fingers brush against her clit and she’s loud in the gasping moan that comes out, her mouth in a perfect circle. Needy in the way she’s pushing against him, demanding more without speaking a word aloud. Nikki feels her thighs, shaking against his body as she’s already starting to lose control.

“Cum for me angel.” he  growled out, his hands phishing her back down to get her ass to go up higher., “I’m going to fill you up. You’re going to be dripping me out on your taxi ride home.” her blue eyes flash up at him and she’s so lost in the pleasure of him fucking her that she was not shy. Her usual blush was just flushed cheeks from her pleasure

“I want you to fuck me harder. Please, daddy.” She knows she got to him because NIkki’s groans loudly at her words. Not the usual pants or moans he’d barely get out. The sounds of their bodies meeting with hard wet slaps was filling the bus and her skin was raw and red from his aggression.

“Get on your hands and knees, angel. If you want it rough you’re going to get it.” Flipping over she arches her back, her ass in the air, wiggling it suggestively and gasping out when the hard slap Nikki lays on it stings her.

“NIKKI!” she looked behind her shoulder, mouth slightly open from the surprise spank. The bassist is smiling, grabbing her hips and bringing her back against her cock. It’s deeper in this position and he can hear her soft groans into the bedspread as she adjusts to him at this angle. Her fists are in the sheets and he brings her hips back. Nikki  pushes up her dress, hand on her back as he’s ramming into her. She has nowhere to go and her body is shaking as drives himself deeper. HIs hand slaps her ass again, watching her head toss back and the small smile she gives him.  

Her ass is rosy red from him getting over excited and slapping at it. He tells himself he needs to stop or she won’t be able to sit in the cab on the way home from the spanking. His fingers slide between her legs and he’s not sure if she’d ever been this wet for him. He let his two fingers press against her clit, feeling the motion of himself rocking into her. The sticky wet sounds filling the bunk along with her muffled pants and moans. He circles her button, opens his fingers and slides it between tugging at her nerves and feeling her seem to lift up at this.

“I want you to cum for me now. I’m ready to fill you up and I want to feel you squeezing every drop from me. Deep inside of you. Can you do that like a good girl?” She's a mess of blonde hair but he sees her nod. He wants more time to play with her and explore all the things that make her shake for him. Instead he;s rubbing her clit side to side with his other hand going to her stomach; he knows when she finished she was going to collapse. “Tell me where you want me to cum,angel. You tell me what you want.” This feral need to hear her want him is filling Nikki, as he’s trying to keep himself steady and not lose himself in her.

“I want you to fill my pussy.” He hears her gasp out as he pressed her and then she is coming apart. He watched her elbows fall and her ass is higher as he feels her squeezing around him, drawing him deeper. Nikki’s hand slides to her back to steady himself as he pushes into her, his cock twitching as he starts to fill her.

He was switching out of horny mode as he pulled out of her, his eyes smirking as her ass slid down so she was laying on the bed. It was red from his hands slapping against it and he knew it must sting. Her eyes were sleepy and he knew this was where the usually aftercare of sex came in. He felt guilty knowing she couldn’t shower and clean up right away or come into bed to wrap herself around him, letting him kiss the hickeys and marks he lovingly made. Part of her love language was the need for him to take care of her after sex.

“Angel-“

“I know I need to leave so you can leave.” She muttered, adjusting herself so her dress covered her again. Nikki laid down next to her taking her hand in his, running his thumb over her fingers. “I need to go. Sixx. You’ll be fine.” She teased nudging him out of the bunk.

Nikki helped her out, making sure to grab his jacket and wrap it around her. He could see she was uncomfortable and his mind was racing thinking of what to do or say to her. Before he could get a word out Mick was walking onto the bus.

“Your cab is outside.” Nikki felt this weird compulsion where he wanted to ask her to stay but he was afraid because she would say no. It wasn’t that she didn’t want to go but it was that she had her own dreams that she needed to meet.

“I’ll see you in Vegas in a few days. Try not to get arrested. Please watch Tommy for me.” She asked with a small smile. She was in tip toes kissing him, letting him wrap her in his arms before she got off the bus with a small wave and left him to go tour.

Sasha was pulled from the hotel room, her nose slightly bleeding from all the coke she had been doing with the girls. Her sorority sisters had convinced her to get on a flight Wednesday afternoon with them to go to Vegas. She was supposed to fly in Friday morning to be with Nikki but after class that day they knew she was done for the week and had met her in a cab to drag her to the airport.

Now they had been drinking and doing drugs for the last five hours and she was so fucked up. The red leather dress she was wearing clung to every curve and left very little o the imagination. The night sky was illuminated with neon lights and they all stopped for a second to look around. It was cooler at night and she wished she had brought a jacket but before she could say anything her arm was looped with her friend Jamie and they were headed out down the Strip.

“Are you good?” Her friend asked as they went into a packed bar. Instead of giving an answer she just laughed rushing through the group and out to the dance floor, plucking a drink from someone’s hand as she went. Her body twisted around people, her head spinning as she laughed. Her friends were all around her, dancing together as they enjoyed the night with just the girls.

The phone was ringing for what seemed like the hundredth time without someone answering the damn thing. Nikki slammed the receiver down reaching for his cigarettes. She was supposed to be home hours ago. Nikki hadn’t spoken to his girlfriend in twenty four hours and was now losing his mind. Tommy burst into the room, not knowing why they weren’t out on the town together. He saw the grouchy look on the bassists face and knew what was bothering him before he even said anything.

“She’s probably out with her friends, like you should be.” Tommy motioned for the door and Nikki sighed. He should go out with the boys and enjoy Vegas. There was the chance she had picked up extra shifts at work or she was out with her girlfriends. Maybe she was going to a roller disco or spending too much  money on the clothes she would tease him in until he was ripping them off. “C’mon, Sixx. There’s a nightclub downstairs and you can make fun of everyone and we can get wasted and charge a bill to one of the dudes in Kiss’s room.” He was getting up following the drummer out of the room.

“This better be fun. And she better not call when we’re out.” Nikki grumbled as they got in the elevator. He had talked to her about their schedule and there was no reason that she should be missing. Tommy did have a point about her having her own life. He wanted her to be able to have time with her friends but he was feeling codependent. And she was the first person in his life that he really missed.

He hated the music but he sat at the bar drinking anyway. Tommy was trying to find girls and blow for them well he people watched. Sasha would love it here. He could imagine her dancing to the shitty disco music, her laughter as people clapped along to songs. He was missing her so much he swore he heard the sound of her laughing. His eyes scanned the crowd and his eyes narrowed as he saw a girl that looked like one of her friends. Nikki was standing up moving through the dances in a fog. There was no way that she could be there but sure enough he saw the tight red leather dress, her hand out as her friend tapped a bump of cocaine out and her sniffing, rubbing her nose after and downing her drink. As if she sensed him, her eyes looked up meeting Nikki’s.

“Oh Shit.” he heard her mutter, the girls looked up as he got closer and they all had the sense to scatter instead of dealing with him, “Hey, Sixx. Fancy meeting you here. Lets dance.” she joked in reference to the Bowie song playing. Here she was, partying, nose red from all the coke she had been sniffing, in this tighter than life red leather dress looking like a dream. All the fears of her being dead were gone and Nikki couldn’t help but lean forward kissing her. She wrapped her arms around his neck, wiggling her body and he rolled his eyes.

“One song, angel.” he warned, watching the pure delight on her face. He grabbed the red glass vile she was holding tapping out some powder on his hand and sniffing it up. “What happens in Vegas stays in Vegas. None of this shit when we get home.” she knew he meant the drugs so she nodded. Her hands raised in the air as she wiggled closed to him.

“Let's dance, Sixx. And then you can take me up to your hotel room and give me all the love that I earned after the tour bus. I couldn’t sit right for a full day.” she gave him a pouty look and he was kissing her again thinking of dragging her up to the room now. He wanted her, all of her and it was all that he could think of.

“I wish you were wearing a white dress.” he was dragging her close.

“Way to make a girl feel good about herself.” she muttered. A teasing smile on her lips, “I thought you’d like my rock and roll outfit. I was going to rewear this for your show on Saturday but I guess not.” He looked nervous and she suddenly wondered if they had both were too fucked up. “Hey, let's just get out of here.” She was pulling him off the crowded dance floor but Nikki had this look on his face like he was realizing something.

“Would you marry me tomorrow?” He asked as they got over to where the bar was. He was looking at her and realizing things he had been taking for granted. Sasha laughed while sipping the water she had ordered to cool down.

“Of course. You know how I feel about you.” They haven’t said the words yet but she hoped he still knew. Nikki was looking at her still, the intense gaze throwing her off kilter. “Why are you looking at me like that? You’re making me nervous.” She admitted but he was grabbing her hand and not seeming to realize he was acting like a complete maniac.

“Do you know how I feel about you? Do you know how much I love you? Because I do love you. I love how you take care of me without me even realizing you’re taking care of me. I love how you gas up my music and make it seem like we’re topping the Billboard charts. You always show up, even when I was an asshole you’d come to shows and be there for us. You love me outside of the stage makeup and rockstar shoes. You love me in the kitchen making dinner or on Sundays when I watch football. You love me and not who I need to be. You know me so well and you don’t resent me. And you trust me.” He was ranting but she was listening, her eyes on him as she took in everything he was saying to her, “You’re the first person I’ve ever missed. It’s a big joke about how pouty I was leaving but, my god, when you’re not around it sucks. So please marry me tomorrow, Angel. We can elope in a little church and start our lives in true richer or poorer fashion.” Sasha realized that he was serious and that he really did want to marry her.

“April 1st. I’ll marry you on April 1st. That way you never have an excuse to forget our anniversary.” She teased. Nikki scooped her into his arms, her legs wrapping around him as he carried her into the hotel room. They had less than 48 hours to plan everything.

“Where the fuck is Tommy?” Sasha asked, turning to look around the small room she and her girlfriends were in. They were all crammed into the Vegas wedding chapel and there was this weird unspoken question with everyone wondering if this was just an April fools joke the couple was playing on everyone. But the girls had gone out to help her find the vintage lace tea length dress she was wearing. They had all gotten the red dresses to be her stand in bridesmaid and they made sure she had a bouquet of flowers. They seemed to realize when she bought a wedding ring for her soon to be husband that this wasn’t a joke for her.

Tommy burst into the room holding a couple boxes wrapped in newspaper and balancing a bouquet of pink roses on top. Sasha rushed forward grabbing the flowers before he dropped them, smiling as she sniffed the fresh buds. Tommy had on a white shirt that he had tucked into leather pants and his usual beat up Chuck Taylor’s on. He had a pink rose pinned to the denim jacket that he was wearing.

“Your groom has sent you some gifts.” He said putting them down on the table. Before she could open them he was pulling her aside, “Are you guys seriously getting married because Nikki is putting a lot of effort in and I can’t decide if it’s all just an April Fools joke or

not.” He seemed confused by everything that was going on and his head was spinning. Nikki had been so dead set against relationships and now he was going to marry Sasha after only being with her officially for maybe three months. It seemed crazy.

“You’re walking me down the aisle and I’m going to marry Nikki. But first you need to give him this.” She handed him a box that was wrapped in white paper, a gold bow on top that she made and probably took her a half hour to tie. Tommy groaned after being the errand boy. “Here, take a shot with me before you go.” She was pouring out Jack Daniels in healthy amounts into the glasses, shooting it back as he left.

Her attention shifted to the gifts on the table and she grabbed the smaller box first. Inside was a pair of Keds, she smiled seeing Nikki’s neat hand writing ‘Mrs.Sixx 4-1-83’ on the shoes. A small note inside the box said this was for her to not get cold feet. She slipped the Keds on, glad to get rid of the heels. The next box revealed a leather jacket where he had put a Motley Crue patch, a few pins, and on the back was Mrs. Sixx. Another note let her know that it was for the concert tonight. She couldn’t contain her smile thinking about how she was going to be his wife. She was so excited and didn’t have any fear in her about him. She wondered if she was stupid for not taking a second and thinking about what it would mean to be his wife. She had just wanted to be with him and she was going to do it.

Nikki tied the black boots she had bought him, smiling at how they both had very similar gifts. Instead of giving him a jacket she had made him this scrapbook. It had a ton of stuff from the start of the band she had saved, making him realize how she had been there for it all. And then there were pictures he didn’t know existed of the two of them. Images of them in the morning at the original apartment with her sitting on the windowsill and him I’m talking. There were pictures of Halloween with her in her bunny costume, a random hand that he was sure was Vince’s creeping into view to grab the tail well he had his arm around her. His favorite picture was this one where they had been talking, sitting on a stone wall and he was cupping her face. They had been talking when Tommy had snapped the picture and he had turned to look for the photo but she was looking at him with pure love.

He knew that he wouldn’t ever feel the way he did for Sasha with anyone else and as much as he joked about not getting married until the late 80s it felt like then to elope in Vegas. He still wanted to be in the band and get big and he wanted her to finish college and have her life. The marriage wasn’t going to stop either of them from having their goals but it just cemented them together. Nikki loved her. He wanted this whole life with her and he wasn’t going to rush everything else like kids but he wanted her love selfishly to himself. He wanted her to be his wife and for everyone to know that she was off fucking limits. He looked at the time and knew that it was time.

Nikki was standing at the end of the aisle, next to Elvis. He hadn’t wanted to get married by Elvis but this was really their only option in the city. Plus when they had been asked if they wanted Elvis Sasha had laughed so hard thinking it was a joke and when they had told her it was a serious option she couldn’t say no. Mick and Vince were beside him and her girlfriends standing across from them. He gulped hearing the wedding song, pulling at his leather jacket and running his palms over the black denim. He was thankful she had asked for pictures to be taken because he never wanted to forget the moment he saw her. Her vintage dress was exactly what he had imagined her in, the Keds he had made for her showing as she walked down the aisle holding his drummers arm. She gave him this smile about halfway down and Nikki was walking towards her, leaning down to kiss her before he knew what he was doing.

“Dude you’re supposed to wait until I hand her off to you.” Tommy said shaking his head, but Nikki was taking her hand walking her up to Elvis. She handed her bouquet to one of the girls and he took both her hands, kissing them.

“You’re gorgeous.” He loved seeing the pink in her cheeks and the way her blue eyes sparkled at his compliment. “I love you.” He had waited too long to say it and now he couldn’t stop telling her.

“I know.” She retorted with that big smile. Her eyes shifted to the man that was marrying them and suddenly everyone was waiting for the big April Fools announcement. But the couple was staring at each other with such intensity and saying I Do.

“I now pronounce these two hunka hunka burning lovers, as Man and Wife. You can kiss your bride.” Nikki held her face in his hands, feeling her hands on his biceps. A smile on both of their faces as they pulled away.

“Hello, Mrs. Sixx.” Nikki said softly, watching the way her blue eyes flashed in excitement.

“Hi Mr. Sixx, are you ready for your concert?” She asked as he weaved their hands together.  The pair moved out of the church, rice being thrown at them like a weapon thanks to the boys. Sasha grabbed the jacket Nikki had given her, shrugging it on.

“You two really got married. That wasn’t an April’s fool joke?” Vince asked, stunned as he looked between the pair of them. Nikki had his arm wrapped around His wife, a smile on his face. The photographer was still taking pictures of them.

“I’m Mrs. Sixx now, Vinny boy. That means no more goose honking my ass.” She warned looking at the lead singer. The blonde man looked crushed by this fact. If he had known this wasn’t a joke he would have honked all morning.

“I told you it was real.” Mick told them. The couple were smiling at each other not seeming to care about the argument that everyone was having around them. Nikki kept spinning the ring on her finger. She had on a sapphire ring with diamonds around it because she had been obsessed with the Royal Wedding the summer he met her. Obsessed to the point Nikki found a hoard of magazines about it. He loved feeling the ring on her finger and loved how she looked in the leather jacket with his name on it.

“Nikki.” She said his name softly and his attention was all hers. “This is the best day of my life. I love you. I’m always going to love you. I just wanted you to know that.” The bassist had felt alone for so long and he knew now that it was them in it together.

“You and me, Angel. Forever.” He promised, sealing the deal with a kiss. They didn’t have anything but dreams and each other but they both felt like they had it all.

[radiorenjun]

H e l l o !

W e l c o m e !

here is radiorenjun’s official nct dream masterlist!

A n g s t - ♠

F l u f f - ♡

S u g g e s t i v e - ⋆

•〖。M a r k  ��L e e。〗

- [22:41] ♠ ♡

- [03:14] ♠

- [12:04]  ♡

• 〖。H u a n g   R e n j u n。〗

- [15:47] ♡

- [15:21] ♡

- [13:41] ♡

- [12:23] ♡

- [16:47] ♠ ♡

- [12:23]   ♡

• My first and last  ♠ ♡  

 Huang Renjun was born on the coldest day on earth, which causes his heart to be frozen solid, requiring a replacement. The makeshift Doctor, Madam Wendy, who provides midwifery and medical services to the poor and the desperate of Edinburgh, grafts a miniature cuckoo clock in order to save it. However his newfound cuckoo clock heart was so fragile that it could end him in a terrible fate of death if he does not follow the three rules said doctor had provided for him. One of which was he must never fall in love. Do come and enter this adventure through Renjun’s eyes as he falls for a street singer who hates wearing glasses despite of her poor eyesight.

• nightmare surfs  ♠ ♡

 you've been suffering from random nightmares as of late. You didn't know how but when they get too far, you're glad you have something (or rather, someone) to seek comfort.

• bury me at makeout creek  ♡ ⋆

->  Your enemy/rival, Huang Renjun, kept teasing and flirting with you during a party Haechan dragged you in. And you couldn't help but fall deep in love and get addicted to him after this momentous night.

• eine kleine  ♠ ♡

-> your selfish, ignorant parents had sent you off to be wedded with a stranger you’ve only met once to save your kingdom from falling into poverty. Fortunately for you, the Huangs welcomed you into their family with open arms, except for their stone-hearted son (alias your fiance), Huang Renjun, who believed that you were just after his family’s wealth and fortune.

Will you manage to finally live the happy life you’ve been craving for all these years of neglect?

Will you manage to thaw his heart like an ice cube in the summer heat?

Or will you crumble under the pressure of being wedded to the cold hearted prince?  

• carnations have thorns too ♠ ♡

-> after years and years of hopelessly pining for your step brother's best friend since you were six years old. life for you had gone from stealing roses from mrs. wong's garden to having sushi picnic dates on the park every thursday. to stop you from getting small  for the sake of giving him roses, an eight year old renjun told your six year old self that he preferred carnations instead of roses. what he failed to tell you at that moment was that carnations have thorns too.

• 〖。L e e   J e n o。〗

- [16:41] ♡ ♠

- [12:45] ♡

- [11:12] ♡

- [17:32] ♠

- [23:58] ♠

- [03:00] ♡

•  Habits ♠ pt one. pt two

-> Your ex boyfriend! Jeno pays you a nightly visit after getting drunk and high alone.

•  kitchen frolics  ♡

->  you and your boyfriend, Jeno, decided to do a Christmas cooking live stream on twitch with no cooking experience whatsoever. It's safe to say you two were just two loud, idiotic simps obnoxiously trying to cook with 6k people tells you say to do.

• 〖。L e e   H a e c h a n。〗

- [15:21] ♡

- [17:12] ♡

- [12:15] ♡

- [06:13] ♠ c o l l a b w/ @dreamsafterhours !

- [11:21] ♡ ♠

- [00:00] ♠

- [06:39] ♠

- [11:27] ♡

- [03:57]  ♡

- [12:39]  ♡

- [11:27]  ♡

•  twisted strings  ♠

->   you and donghyuck were one of the rare soulmate couples unlucky enough to be cursed by your own string

• 〖。N a   J a e m i n。〗

- [01:21] ♡ ♠

- [15:21] ♡

- [18:54] ♡

- [21:23] ♠

- [23:09]   ♡ ♠

- [18:34]  ♡ ⋆

-  [07:24]  ♡

•   we fell in love in october  ♡ ♠

-> Na Jaemin, the youngest crowned prince of the Jung Empire, who constantly lived under his half older brother's shadow. Na Jaemin was a prince who used dark magic to turn his own heart into stone, thus eradicating his ability to feel emotions other than his life long pent up anger and hatred towards his family. Alas, even rocks break. His stone heart began to crack the moment he met a certain witch who could produce rare crystals out of her own tears and folds paper cranes during her free time. The witch who made Jaemin realise his self worth and encourage him to rebel for his own freedom.

Jaemin treating his girl like a p r i n c e s s ♡

I Don't Need It ♠ ♡

-> Na Jaemin despised the idea of soulmates, he wanted to fight against fate for choosing his soulmate for him. Even if it means his stubborn childhood best friend wouldn't stop trying to make him accept about the similar tattoos on their wrists.

• 〖。Z h o n g  C h e n l e。〗

- [08:11]  ♡

• Rain Rituals   ♡

- Chenle’s high school life was more than tedious to say the least. That is when he caught you screaming under the rain.

• 〖。P a r k   J i s u n g。〗

- [15:21] ♡

- [19:35]  ♡

•〖。r e a c t i o n s。〗

- finding out you're extremely rich after dating for a long time → ଘo(∗ ❛ั ᵕ ❛ั )੭່

[jlalafics]

“Wild”, an Everlark ficlet-Part 1 of 3

For @hungergamesfangirl02, who requested a high school pregnancy Everlark.

Hope you enjoy!

Summary: “Katniss never wanted children. She’s not maternal; the mom gene never developed in her body and it makes perfect sense that she should not go through with this pregnancy.” Rated M.

Trigger Warning: Abortion. Alcohol and Drug Use, Underage Sex

-----

“I just bought a new car

One where the top goes down

So we can see the stars

I wanna take you so far

Out past the Saturn rings

And into my heart…”

—John Legend “Wild”

 Wild

Part One: Months 1 to 3

“I don’t know why we’re even going to this party.”

Katniss reaches for the bottle of vodka, taking a quick sip before walking into Johanna’s closet. Her best friend’s closet is much better than her own paltry selection of clothing and she flips through the selection of dresses before settling on a short olive number with a corset.

“Because it’s Gale’s birthday and that guy has a huge boner for you,” Johanna replies, a rolled joint between her fingers. “He’s like, dying for you to welcome him into adulthood.”

“We’re friends; have been since we were kids.” Katniss pulls her shirt over her head, her jeans following it to the carpet. “I can’t even think about him that way without thinking that our children would come out with extra toes.”

“You’ve thought about children with him?” Johanna cackles as she stands to help Katniss pull the dress on.

“With disgust,” Katniss informs her. “I don’t even want children. My genetics—with the exception of Prim—prove that Everdeens should not breed.”

“I’m not talking about breeding with him. I’m talking about fucking him.” Johanna zips Katniss up before looking at her friend approvingly. “Nice.”

Katniss reaches for a bottle of vodka, taking a deeper swig of the alcohol. She could already feel the rush from the pills she’d taken before coming to the Mason mansion.

“Let’s get this over with,” she tells Johanna. “I don’t want to waste this high on you.”

“Fuck you!” Her best friend throws an arm around her. “You know you love me.”

Katniss grins, pressing a light kiss to Johanna’s lips. “I don’t love anyone else but you and Prim.”

“Sorry to burst your bubble—but I like cock.” Her best friend’s face sobers for a quick moment. “A particular one, but you know how it goes.”

A laugh escapes Katniss’ vodka-lined lips. “Let’s go and forget about cocks for one night.”

“Agreed.” They shake hands before grasping each other’s fingers, then kissing the tops of each other’s hands. “I think the Uber is here.”

They head out, the smell of liquor and weed permeating the room before Johanna takes one last toke of her blunt and closes the door behind her.

++++++

The Hawthornes own a moderately-sized home on the opposite side of town known as the Seam. The great thing is the houses are so far apart that no one even notices the large congregations of cars parked along the street.

The two-story farmhouse is filled to the brim with people. From what Katniss could gauge, it is most of the upcoming senior class. Johanna is already pulling her into the packed house, and Katniss puts up little resistance since the pills are causing everything to move in slow motion.

The calm steadiness from the medication helps her usually-frantic system. Without them, Katniss is hitting highs where she’s doing things like studying the ceiling of her room, counting every single speck on it (last count: 250) or hitting lows where she won’t even bother leaving her bed.

It’s really her mother’s fault for leaving her medications out—in their cabinet—where anyone could just sneak a pill or two.

“Katniss!” They turn to find Gale heading towards them, two blonds flanking his sides. One of them is Marvel, who was on the wrestling team with Gale. The other one is unfamiliar, but his eyes are so brilliantly blue that Katniss is sure that it’s the drugs making them that way.

“Hey!” She gives Gale a smile. “Happy beginning of the end!”

“She means happy birthday!” Johanna pipes in loudly since they’re next to one of the speakers. Katniss smiles at Marvel. “Hey, Marvel.” Then, she looks to the other boy. “Who the hell are you?”

“This is Peeta Mellark,” Gale says. “Just transferred from Capitol High. He’s the newest recruit for the wrestling team. We’ve all been practicing together at the school gym.”

“So, you can pin someone down?” Katniss suddenly asks the boy in front of her.

“I’m not that good, but I’m getting there.” Peeta holds out his hand to her, his blue eyes staring into her hazed greys. “What’s your name?”

She takes it, enjoying the feeling of his warm hand wrapped in hers immediately. “Katniss Everdeen.”

Johanna looks between the two, her dark eyes lighting up devilishly.

“Oh, you two—something’s going to happen here.”

++++++

Katniss hates when Johanna was right.

The thought rushes into her mind as she’s straddling Peeta in his car, the droptop open as they fuck in the middle of the woods twenty or so minutes away from Gale’s party. She can still hear the music as she rocks against Peeta.

It started so innocently.

They had started talking about the upcoming school year; they are in the same AP classes and she tells him about her plans to get the hell out of Panem to UC Berkeley, which is way across the country.

“No shit! I’m going to Berkeley!” Peeta tells her. “I’m planning to go into environmental studies. How about you?”

“Not sure,” she says, looking around the party to distract herself from the closeness of the boy. Katniss knows nothing about him, except for the fact that just standing next to him causes her body to come alive. “Isn’t that what your first two years are for? To decide?”

“True.” Peeta takes another sip from his cup, his cheeks already pink. Katniss thinks it’s adorable—or at least the vodka does. “Tell me about our classmates.”

“I can’t talk shit about them here,” she counters. “You have a car?”

Peeta nods. “Across the street.”

Katniss takes his hand, entwining their fingers. “Let’s go and I’ll tell you all about them.”

He looks to her as they head out of the party. “Gale tells me that you’re trouble.”

“Gale has been wanting to get into my pants for years,” she retorts when they reach his car. “Of course, he’d say that to someone I’m interested in.”

“You’re interested in me?” Peeta asks as he opens the door for her.

“I am trouble,” Katniss informs him. “And I am.”

++++++

They never get to talking about their classmates.

Instead, Peeta opens the top of the car and Katniss is immediately thrilled by the cool wind hitting her cheeks. She curls up in her seat, head thrown back as she stares up at the black sky filled with stars; they seem so much brighter tonight.

The car is speeding up and she holds her arms out unafraid—because she’s flying high with this beautiful boy beside her.

She looks to him and sees the hunger in his gaze as he watches her.

Katniss points to a clearing on the side of the road and Peeta immediately turns, the tires squealing as the car enters the forest.

As soon as he parks the car, Katniss is on him, her thighs straddling him in his seat as she leans down to kiss him. Peeta responds eagerly, his hand reaching for the nape of her neck to deepen the kiss and she moans, feeling her center twisting almost painfully.

Every part of her consciousness whispers in her ear: ‘Take him, fuck him, make him yours…’

“You’re driving me wild,” Peeta says against her skin, his lips going to her neck as his hands travel down her arms.

Her own hands are already reaching to pull his cock out from his jeans and she’s happy to know that he is well-endowed—thick and just the right length. She could really care less about length; it’s the width that she craves. She loves feeling of every ridge of a cock filling her up; she loves the fullness of her cunt hugging a thick one.

“That’s a good thing,” Katniss says as she strokes him, her hand moving rapidly up and down. He’s practically humping her hand. “Just let yourself feel, Peeta.”

She thanks her foresight for deciding on barely-there underwear as she moved the scrap of cloth away from her slit and plunges down onto his length.

“Fuck!” Peeta feels unbelievable and Katniss wants nothing more than to feel him as deep as she can. She rides him, listening to him moan and call out her name. His hands are on her hips, guiding her as he thrusts up. “Yes, like that Peeta…”

“You’re unbelievable,” he says against her ear. “Like you were made for me.”

The timbre of his voice, so thick with desire, drives her to move faster. She loses herself in the feel of him, telling him every dirty thing that she wants them to do together; how she wants him to fuck her mouth and how she wants him to ride his face till he’s drenched in her slick…

Peeta comes when she tells him that she wants to call him Daddy.

She climaxes, feeling his come fill her, his blue eyes wild and lost in his own orgasm.

As they come down, they cling to one another, not quite ready to move, just enjoying the feeling of togetherness and feeling like there’s no one else in the world right now but them.

++++++

School starts without a hitch and Katniss and Peeta’s little tryst is put aside as they enter their senior year.

The morning after was not awkward at all; she simply kissed him and offered to pay for breakfast. They drive up to a Wendy’s and eat in the parking lot before he dropped her off at Johanna’s house where she was supposed to be sleeping over.

Peeta asks for her number and she gives it to him before kissing him chastely goodbye.

They even have classes together; they get paired together in Miss Trinket’s World Cultures class. They work on their presentation on Brazil, her hand moving along his thigh with their ankles twisted together.

They never fuck, though—on more than one occasion—one of them catches the other alone for a mind-blowing kiss in a deserted hallway.

She goes to wrestling matches with Johanna on the pretense of supporting the team, but it’s mostly to watch Peeta. She can tell that Gale is pissed at her; he’s not exactly looking at Peeta like a friend anymore ever since Johanna pointed out how Peeta left with Katniss during his party.

“Oh Katniss…I can see why you let him fuck you,” Johanna says as they watch Peeta wrestle someone from the opposing team. “Look at that ass.”

She sighs, her nipples aching in remembrance. “I never got a chance to do anything with his ass, but if it’s as good as his cock—then it’s best to leave it as it is.”

“You should let him take you out,” Johanna tells her.

“No. We’ve got a good thing going on,” Katniss insists. “I don’t need anything more.”

However, she embarrassingly stands up and cheers when he wins the match.

Their eyes meet and the smile he gives her tells her that she’s playing with fire.

++++++

Another month has passed, and Katniss realizes that she hasn’t had her period.

Her breasts hurt, but the blood has not come.

“How could you not realize that you haven’t had your period?” Johanna asks as they sit in her bathroom, waiting for the test results on the store bought pregnancy test. “Also, have you not heard of emergency contraception?”

“I spent the rest of that weekend in front of this very toilet,” Katniss tells her tightly. “I wasn’t exactly in the right mindset.”

“How are you going to tell your mother?” her friend continues to prod.

“I’m not,” she replies. “I’m just going to have it taken care of—if I am.”

“You are.” Johanna picks up the test to show her the bold pink plus sign. “Are you going to tell him?”

“No—” Katniss coughs back her tears. “I told you. I’m taking care of it.”

However, when her best friend takes her in her arms, she can’t help but cry.

++++++

“How’s school?” Katniss asks Prim, her younger sister, over breakfast.

“Okay.” Prim digs into her pancakes and looks to Katniss. “Aren’t you hungry?”

“I have toast.” Katniss holds up the piece. The nausea has come full force and so she’s sticking to things that won’t make her head fall into a toilet for the millionth time. “Anything cool happening?”

“How many cool things happen in middle school?” her sister retorts with a smile. “We are having a school dance next week.”

Katniss sits next to her. “Do you have a date?”

“I’m going with Rory and Rue and bunch of our friends,” Prim informs her. Rory is Gale’s younger brother and Rue has been friends with Prim since Pre-K. “Hey Katniss? Who’s Peeta Mellark?”

“A guy at my school,” Katniss replies in surprise. “Why?”

“Rory says that Gale’s all bent out of shape because you two apparently were together at his party,” her sister informs her. “And he called this morning.”

Katniss had stopped replying to his texts after finding out she was pregnant.

“I heard that his family is rich,” Prim tells her. “Like, they have some big real estate company and own most of the retail lots in Chicago and Washington D.C.” Her sister bounces in her seat, blonde hair moving with her. “Does he like you?”

“He’s nice and we hung out. That’s about it.”

“But he called you and seemed really nice on the phone,” Prim continued. “Rue and I looked him up on Facebook. He’s really cute.”

“I agree. He is cute.” So was his cock, but that was neither here nor there. “But you know relationships with boys like that never work out with girls like me. We barely make enough for rent and Mom has to work all the time. I’m just lucky that I got a full scholarship for Berkeley.”

“You’re like Star-Crossed Lovers!” Prim squeals, her blue eyes dreamy.

“You know they die at the end,” Katniss points out.

Her sister snorts. “You’re no fun.”

++++++

The Friday of Prim’s school dance, Katniss finds herself at Johanna’s again. There’s no weed or vodka tonight. Instead, she is sitting in her bathroom; her best friend giving her a moment to herself. Katniss sits on the lid of the toilet, two packets of pills in each of her hands: mifepristone and misoprostol—or Pill 1 and Pill 2 for her convenience.

There’s an unopened bottle of water next to her; she’s wearing her favorite pair of sweats and the oversized sweater that she kept that was her Dad’s. It was the only things she kept of his after he died. She is prepped, wearing a pad as the clinic instructed and Johanna has a heating pad if she needs it.

All she must do is take the pills.

It had been unbelievably easy to get them, a simple exam telling her that she’s entering her third month of pregnancy and that the blood tests look fine. She’s been screened for STDs and has come out clean—good to know—and is in perfect health.

The doctor at the clinic tells her that it’s better to do this somewhere comfortable so she goes to Johanna’s—she can’t imagine being at home waiting to abort—and she needs her friend’s support.

Johanna welcomes her—they have always had each other’s backs.

She opens the first packet of Pill 1 and then places it on the counter before opening the bottle of water.

Katniss holds the pill in her hand—she easily finds her way to pills…but something holds her back.

“You have to understand.” She’s not sure who she is reasoning to. “I’m only seventeen. I barely know your Dad. You will ruin everything…” Katniss says the last part shakily. “I don’t mean it like that. I mean—I have so many plans and I don’t know how to fit you into them.”

Her hand reaches for that first pill and her fingers tremble.

“Just fucking do it!”

Katniss has no idea why she is crying. Maybe it’s because she can picture her father’s sad eyes staring at her before they morph into Peeta’s lovely blues. She can already tell that Peeta might love her—but love is for suckers and she knows she only has the capability to hurt.

She’s already hurting him—the one in her stomach that she’s supposed to be getting rid of.

Katniss never wanted children. She’s not maternal; the mom gene never developed in her body and it makes perfect sense that she should not go through with this pregnancy.

She tells herself this as she flushes Pill 1 down the toilet.

“You have no idea what you’re fucking doing!”

Katniss tells herself this through her sobs as she takes Pill 2, opens the case, and flushes it down the toilet as well.

There’s a buzz on her phone; it’s Peeta.

Perfect fucking timing: ‘Please talk to me.’

She responds immediately, ‘I’m at Johanna’s house. Can you pick me up?’

Texting him her friend’s address, his response comes in less than a minute:

‘I’m already outside.’

End of Part One

 *I should be updating this every other day. 

[nalufever]

do you have any more nalu fic recs?

Sorry, not sorry - you’ve unleashed more than you could’ve guessed. ^^ Always happy to Recommend a List of Fics ~ And thank you for asking! Admittedly there’s a few Recs that aren’t Nalu - I got excited to share my favs. ;)

A Girl Worth Fighting For: Natsu navigates unspeakable horrors to win Lucy’s love or Natsu goes shopping, looking for the perfect white day gift. 

A Lesson: Natsu and Lucy can’t keep themselves from expressing their passions - and the results are bed breaking. Short but smutty - smexy in fact. ;P 

A Solidly Constructed Kiss: Erza strong-arms Lucy and Natsu into working the Kissing Booth to raise funds for a school trip. Lucy’s never been kissed and Natsu acts like he’s never entertained even the idea of kissing another person. Things naturally come to a head when Lucy and Natsu are given the task to build the actual booth; will they fight over construction or build themselves some kind of relationship? 

Fairy Tail Week: A collection of drabbles from tumblr prompts to celebrate Fairy Tail. Fairy, Ladies, Lads, Magic, Guild, Ultimate Team, Stronger, Mashima, Tail. Only rated teen to err on the side of caution, family friendly content featuring most of the Fairy Tail Guild! 

Feathers and Scales: Angel/Demon AU. Devils are more than they seem and Angels no less. Pitted against each other in a never-ending battle for souls, a single Angel and Devil trade mercies and fall in love. Warning: major character death(s). 

Full Moon Secret: Natsu had wanted to tell Lucy his secrets, to share his family history with the fey…it had just never been the right time. Tonight the truth was going to be revealed, one way or another. 

Okay, I could just keep hyping all of my own fics individually - but I won’t - other than to just put in a link to ALL OF THEM. ;) Fair warning, I have a few other fandoms works in all the Fairy Tail stories - from Brooklyn 99 to The Flash, Snow White with the Red Hair, RWBY, Blue Exorcist, Teen Titans and some Hakuouki. Yes, I’m a shameless self-promoter. Speaking of that - one more I need to rec!  Natsu’s Stars in Lucy’s Sky. I swear Imma finish this. 

I also have more than a few favourite authors who write for Fairy Tail (and other fandoms) ~ some have not contributed lately to Fairy Tail or chosen to concentrate on other fandoms - but I like them and their excellent writing. 

ObsessedwithNalu: One of my first fandom friends and pretty much any of her FT stories is gold. @obsessedwithnalu  

Christmas Treats: Admittedly a gift to me and very cherished for that fact - and - it’s frigging awesome. Lucy does a little holiday baking at home before Fairy Tail’s Christmas party. Natsu, as always, is there. One thing leads to another… 

Thanks, Krov: When Krov decided to relax at his favorite bar after work, he never imagined that he’d be seeing some of his old guild members, especially since he thought they had died long ago. Nalu fluff. 

Edo-Nalu love fest: Submissions for the Nalu love fest week of 2014. But instead of regular Nalu, these ones feature Edo-Nalu. Smut-tastic and delightfully mature. 

ImpracticalDemon: Another early fandom friend who’s still writing this, that and the other thing - and she’s just GREAT. Again, a link to all her works and a few that are special to me follow. XOXOX @impracticaldemon  

May the Best Man Survive: “Gray would never have in a million years thought he’d host Natsu’s bachelor party (Nalu pairing). Why is it his job to herd the bunch of rowdy mages from bar to bar, ending up at the guild where the real surprise party is? Oh yeah, the idiot had asked him to be the best man at his wedding. Hijinks, chaos and hilarity ensue.” ^^ A prompt supplied by me and I’m smirking so wide because the fic Imp came up with delivered more awesomeness than I could have hoped for! 

A Star At His Side: “Accidentally Fall Asleep Together” for Endragoneel on tumblr. Natsu and Lucy spend the day together at a festival in Magnolia. Natsu ends up watching more than just the stars when the festival is over… 

Christmas Gifts: When Erza walks Wendy home from the Guild’s Christmas Party, Wendy realizes how alone her friend and mentor is feeling. She sets out to recruit Lucy, Natsu and the rest to break Jellal out of prison for just one night, as a Christmas gift for Erza. Meanwhile, Natsu has accidentally burned some of Lucy’s writing. Will she forgive him? 

Dark Shining Light: One of the best and most welcoming writers I have ever interacted with! I’m still gobsmacked she’s a friend! She’s a legend and I don’t know what else I could add to any discourse about her writing - but the classics are classic for a reason, yeah? Here’s a few of my personal favourites of her works and just know there’s too many to list them all! AKA @ff-darkshininglight 

Mischievous Cat: Let’s just say there have been a few incidents where Happy has come in at a bad time. 

What Belongs to a Demon: Everyone knew she belonged to the great demon lord and she would prove that she deserved to stand by his side. 

The Truth Revealing Cards: Lucy should have known if there was a card that would reveal her secrets, Natsu would want it. 

Eliz1369: Got introduced to her for her Hakuoki fics but she’d dipped her toes into FT as well ~ and this is a great fic. ^^ @eliz1369 

The Light of Fairy Tail: The members of Fairy Tail may be their own brand of crazy, but their hearts are always in the right place. 

rougescribe: Shame on me for not reading more of this author’s works! @rougescribe  

Fire Sprite No 5: For him, Heaven wasn’t a place or a single moment in time. It was a feeling built on memories upon memories, past and present and a hope for future ones all tied down together. All sharing one common denominator: Her. Nalu. Tumblr Valentine’s Event. 

Fallen Ark Angel: Admittedly I only have interacted from afar with this writer. I mainly read Nalu fics but I love her take on Mira and Laxus and her next gen offspring characters. She’s got a lot to offer and it’s all superb. @fallen029

Loving Satan: Loving Satan is never easy. But when she loves you back, its twice as bad. 

Madartiste: Another one-sided love affair with someone else’s writing. And her stories are all wonderful and prolly appear on hundreds of Fic Rec Lists - but here’s one of my Favs! @madartiste  

Hoarding: Getting interrupted gets old fast. 

UranoMetria: I added her to my stable of fav authors 05-03-2014. Wow. Eons ago and even if I’m not sure she’s still active in the fandom, I salute her. Kudos. 

The Goddess Gate: With six years of partnership, Natsu and Lucy are torn apart by a mysterious visit from a secret magic council. Lucy is kidnapped and her memories suppressed. She fights her way back home to regain her life - with a startling secret revealed as she begins to remember. The lives of all Earthland hang in the balance. **Okay, this is a wicked old fic - but amazingly written and fuelled my own desires for writing. Last updated in 2018 but who knows? Some current attention may slay any demons on her back in regards to writing - and even if not - the hours of enjoyment reading this is worth giving a comment just to say, ‘thank you for writing.‘ 

Wild Rhov: Do I even need to say anything about this author? Famous, famous, famous. Excellent. Writes a lot of pairings and fleshes every relationship into something REAL. I Can’t Even. @wildrhov  

Beastly Possession: Something is murdering people in Magnolia. When Lucy is attacked, Natsu goes on a rampage to find the culprit, and everyone in Fairy Tail wants revenge. But could this bloodthirsty attacker be someone they know? Warning: High octane nightmare fuel! Do not read while eating, and beware of red eyes in the dark! 

Shell1331: Introduced via Imp. This writer is in a few fandoms and is worth reading. @shell-senji  

Juicy: Impulsivity and poorly chosen words get Natsu into more trouble than he’d expected, which is saying something for him. 

AbsentAngel: Everyone should know this writer. Been stalking her since 2014 so that says something. Tho, it’s prolly just that I’m creepy. ;) My suggested fic here is being re-written/has been? into something original and worth being purchased when it becomes available and re-read over and over. No, I am not being paid to shill but I am open to having senpai notice me. @absent-angel  

To the Flame: She stares, transfixed, as the blood runs down his fingers and begins to pool in his palm. He holds his hand up to her lips in offering, and she tears her eyes away from the blood to study his face. He is smiling softly. “Go on Luce, I didn’t cut them for nothing.” [Vamp AU] 

HawkofNavarre: Loved for awesome and delightful Gruvia content. Looks like there’s a tumblr but I can’t manage to link it. :(

You Stole the Rain: He just wanted to be friends; fine, she just needed to change his mind. Gray x Juvia 

Ricardian Scholar Clark-Weasley: Not sure I spelled that right even after checking three times! I usually short hand that to RS-CW in my head. And she’s prolific - has a tonne of fandoms and is a tower of talent. Is anyone reading all my fangirl gushing? 'Cause she follows one of my fics and comments (sorry I haven’t updated that fic in a while) and it’s a source of happiness that someone who writes so well happens to enjoy some of my content. Okay, bragging over - back to the Recs! 

Tales of Fairies: A collection of oneshots exploring different friendships, ideas, sad themes, comical scenarios, and lots and lots of pairings…but mainly Nalu. 

snogfairy: Another giant in the FT fandom. Impressive talent. @lineffability  

naughty nalus: smutty nalu oneshots B) ***Mature content!*** 

Rivendell101: Another giant in FT and other fandoms. This author would be considered required reading if I ran a fandom course in a University setting. Just sayin’ @rivendell101  

Crave: /krāv/ Verb. To feel a powerful desire for (something). They crave each other. And satiation doesn’t come easily. He growls against her again. “Beg for it,” he demands, lips ghosting against her. 

Lakerae aka @hidetheremote : Did you think I’d forgotten you? Ha! Gotcha good! You’re an inspiration to me because you’re working so hard to publish your children’s books. Kudos to you li'l sis! You’re busy but still make it a point to talk to me and I love you for that and everything.

The Gift of the Magi: A Gajevy Twist: A retelling of the classic Christmas story “The Gift of the Magi,” with your favorite Fairy Tail couple Gajeel and Levy! It’s Christmas time and Gajeel and Levy exchange gifts. They both are surprised what they receive and learn a lesson of the true meaning of Christmas. 

I could add more and more as I search my saved favs on FF.net ~ and I’m sorry to not include all of them - but this is crazy long as it is. If you read and like any of the recommended fics, please be sure to let the author know. To the authors of these and all fanfics, Thanks for everything.

[luvuwite]

all ov them rn

i think i hate you

01: Do you have a good relationship with your parents? 

i love my parents wtf

02: Who did you last say “I love you” to? 

@sugarbreadz

03: Do you regret anything? 

yeah

04: Are you insecure? 

prOBABLY? im not too sure

05: What is your relationship status? 

single 

06: How do you want to die? 

hopefully not in agony

07: What did you last eat? 

wendys

08: Played any sports? 

swimming ones in freshman year, floor-hockey in 6th

09: Do you bite your nails? 

when im nervous yes

10: When was your last physical fight? 

never fought before

11: Do you like someone? 

shRUGS love is a weird subject for me

i like my friends tho they’re pretty wicked..

12: Have you ever stayed up 48 hours? 

please dont do it its one of the most painful things you can ever do

13: Do you hate anyone at the moment?

uhhh not that i can think of no

14: Do you miss someone?

yes

15: Have any pets? 

my sister

16: How exactly are you feeling at the moment? 

my heart is going doki doki and im very excited and happy rn

17: Ever made out in the bathroom? 

n- 

NO WHAT

18: Are you scared of spiders? 

no not really i just hesitate to take action

19: Would you go back in time if you were given the chance? 

im not sure, life is goING and yknow its going ight rn and im habby with that

20: Where was the last place you snogged someone? 

what does snogg mean

21: What are your plans for this weekend? 

i don’t have anythign i believe

22: Do you want to have kids? How many?

if my other partner wants some sur, im in between 

23: Do you have piercings? How many? 

6

24: What is/are/were your best subject(s)? 

math

25: Do you miss anyone from your past? 

no not rlly

26: What are you craving right now? 

hmmmmm 

chip

27: Have you ever broken someone’s heart? 

yeah

28: Have you ever been cheated on? 

yes

29: Have you made a boyfriend/girlfriend cry? 

yes

30: What’s irritating you right now? 

more of annoying than irritating 

31: Does somebody love you? 

i have

no idea

but q loves me im pretty positive on that

32: What is your favourite color? 

i like the COLORS OF THE RAIN- purple

33: Do you have trust issues? 

im not sure? kinda i think tho i dont wanna be like “OMG I HAVE TRUS-” you get where im coming from

34: Who/what was your last dream about? 

HMMMM one of my irl friends

35: Who was the last person you cried in front of? 

uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

36: Do you give out second chances too easily? 

honestly yeah i think so

37: Is it easier to forgive or forget? 

easier to forgive since its always the small thigsn that come back

38: Is this year the best year of your life? 

no

39: How old were you when you had your first kiss? 

im not a KISSER. I NEVER. KITHED.

40: Have you ever walked outside completely naked? 

n- NO WHAT THE HECK

51: Favourite food? 

SOUP and strawberries

52: Do you believe everything happens for a reason? 

i think decisions lead to consequences, have it be good or bad

53: What is the last thing you did before you went to bed last night? 

charge my phone LOL

54: Is cheating ever okay? 

nope and you will never change my mind with that

55: Are you mean? 

can be

tho im probably not that intimidating HAHA

56: How many people have you fist fought? 

057: Do you believe in true love?

mayb

58: Favourite weather? 

thunderstorms or snow

59: Do you like the snow?

yeSSSSSSS 

60: Do you wanna get married?

marriage.........

61: Is it cute when a boy/girl calls you baby? 

HOENSTLY i didn’t like it at first but i kinda grew into it slightly

62: What makes you happy? 

wendys, sweaaters, my sister yknow the usual

63: Would you change your name? 

no i like my name 

64: Would it be hard to kiss the last person you kissed? 

why.. woULD I KISS THEM that kinda gay

65: Your best friend of the opposite sex likes you, what do you do? 

treat them as the best friend they are wtf is that gonna do

“haha u have a penis now you’re useless to me?” gtfo they are my friend

66: Do you have a friend of the opposite sex who you can act your complete self around?

nO??? there’s Strange but i treat him just ask all my other friENDS??

67: Who was the last person of the opposite sex you talked to? 

Strange

68: Who’s the last person you had a deep conversation with? 

uhh omi

69: Do you believe in soulmates? 

mayb

70: Is there anyone you would die for?

my SISTER shes mine no one touch i will :knife: