#(be kind. I've haven't written lyrics before)

[sgiandubh]

It all starts with a smoke alarm

This wasn't supposed to happen like that, of course. It was supposed to happen with an ”allow me to introduce myself”, at the least. But hey, I am playing the cards I've been dealt, and since an anonymous ask on Tumblr does not allow pictures or links, this will have to do. We'll have plenty of time later.

Yesterday, I said that reading that Single Report reaped benefits. I have screen capped and summed up all the things that made me rise an eyebrow, to make things easier. Hopefully, this is going to be short: who would wax lyrical about a septic tank, after all?

I did not use my superpowers to do this, but simply the link provided by a very active Anon on several shipper blogs, in order to properly stir shite, I presume: https://corumproperty.co.uk/wp-content/uploads/2023/05/HomeReport-31.pdf

Armed with my wits and a virtual highlighter, I started to carefully read the whole document. Ownership details aside - this, I discussed yesterday -, I remind you that it should give any prospective buyer a good, detailed idea of the available fittings and current condition of the house put on sale.

In Europe and elsewhere, I guess, inspections of this type are rather a dull and thorough affair. And these people did an excellent job: they checked every single nook & cranny, used binoculars to have a closer look at the roof tiles and listed it all on these papers a good researcher should read, before dropping to conclusions.

This is how we know, for example, that the inspection happened on a rainy day:

.. and that the guttering was overflowing. Does that sound like a well loved, lived-in house to you?

Thought so.

This brought a smile. And the image of a Christmas tree left near a London dustbin in June. Home, sweet home?

Like all properties, this also comes with burglar and fire alarm systems. However, apparently not much has been done, in this respect. Or at least, not recently. Not since February 2022, to be accurate: otherwise, they would have been upgraded. Yet, no such thing: it's up to the buyer to do and pay for the upgrade.

Lived-in? Certainly not after February 2022 and probably even earlier, would be my best guess. But lived-in at some point in time, most certainly.

You see, since I was on the real estate agent's webpage, I also took the virtual tour of the house. It is available to everyone, here: https://my.matterport.com/show/?m=AFKibrk8QiD

Now, I don't know about you, but when I visit somebody's house for the first time, I always check the bookshelves: yes, I am a shameless nerd. I am also well aware that the rest of the furniture was staged, it looked that sad, clinical way it does all over the world. Did not expect to find any books in there, to be honest. And yet, there they were.

I didn't bother with the fashion coffee table books, although I thought they were a nice nod to Ms. B's past, and totally the kind of things she might have on her credenza.

A built-in bookshelf in the basement caught my eye. That did not look staged. It looked as she might have left some of her own books in there, like an afterthought, if you want. And people's choices of books are always speaking volumes to me, about who they really are.

It did not disappoint.

More fash-un. And yeah, Tiffany & Co! I knew it!

A Tina Turner bio or memoir. Awww:

Bette Davis and some feminist literature. Her books, I am pretty sure of that:

And, to save the best for last, lo and behold, what do we have here?

Bear Grylls?

That Bear Grylls?

Hahahaha. Of course. I have all the reasons in the world to believe the music producer/PA/whatever is into masculine thrillers written by a world-renowned survivalist, haven't I?

Not a chance in hell, to be honest. I grinned like the Cheshire cat because, ladies, we do know WHOSE book is this, don't we?

Judging by its jacket, well-read. Not a prop.

Belonging to someone with a dry, wicked sense of humor who apparently also left this gem:

A Captain's Duty. At this point in time, I wasn't grinning anymore. I was laughing like an idiot, of course.

Slàinte mhath, ladies. We'll have time for a proper introduction later.

[crepesuzette2023]

What We Need Is A Schedule

After the fun and games of one year ago, John and Paul are no longer fooling around. Lennon & McCartney talk about their job, songwriting. from THE BEATLES BOOK MONTHLY, No. 33, June 1966

JOHN: Now that Paul's back from his holidays, we're getting ready to do quite a bit of recording. We have to get two songs for a new single in the next couple of weeks and we've got to start work on another LP album. That means we want nearly twenty new numbers- allowing for a couple of spare ones in case something doesn't really work out when we get in the studio.

PAUL: I think song-writing is like any other kind of writing. You tend to put it off until somebody tells you it has to be finished by a particular date.

JOHN: When we're on our own and we think of an idea for a song, the main thing is to get it down so that it isn't forgotten. Words you can write on bits of paper but it's not that easy with a tune. We've found the best way of all is to use a tape recorder.

PAUL: With a tape you can put on the voice and add bits of guitar and things later when you get a good idea in your mind for a guitar phrase or an introduction.

JOHN: And it doesn't really matter if you haven't got all the lyrics worked out. You can just hum or go "la-la-la-la" for the bits you haven't written yet.

PAUL: Then John and I get together and play over the tapes we've made.

JOHN: Paul's much more of an expert about recording his songs. Some of his tapes are fantastic--they're dubbed and everything so that you get the full group sound--not like mine which are just my own voice and one guitar.

PAUL: Just like any other kind of writing, it's impossible to walk about doing other things and suddenly say to yourself "Ah, l've got a song coming on. Here it comes now" and rush to your tape recorder.

JOHN: I dunno. Sometimes you can start off a new song like that. It depends.

PAUL: We've been talking about this and we've decided we ought to force ourselves to arrange days for songwriting together in advance.

JOHN: It's too easy to put it off if we just meet without any plan and say "Shall we write something today?". If you do that you feel as though you're losing a free day. What we're going to do is make dates beforehand and sort of say "Right Wednesday and Friday of this week are for songwriting. And Tuesday, Wednesday and Thursday of next week". Then we'll know it's something we've to keep to.

PAUL: We'll try to fix times and keep to them. Get into a room with guitars and a piano and a tape recorder and work things out.

JOHN: I said at the start we would need twenty new numbers. Actually, both of us have some half-started stuff which needs finishing. Some of Paul's tapes are almost complete too. We'll probably get five or six songs out of these and then begin thinking up new ones.

PAUL: One of the only real differences between the way we prepare for recording sessions now and the way we did it years ago is that we know more about recording techniques.

JOHN: Earlier on we'd go into the studio and George Martin would say after he'd heard something "Well, that's going to be O.K. but why don't you try putting a so-and-so in there." And he'd suggest an organ sound or double-tracking on something. Now we know just how much can be done in the studio we can think up new sounds and different instruments to use before a session.

PAUL: Means we should get more done at a session.

JOHN: Ah, I've got a song coming on. Here it comes now!

PAUL: Right! Let's get back to work.

Photos accompanying the taped "interview" (J & P talking to tape recorder)

[darkmatters-ghost]

Day 5: Singing

I want to put a TW, but I think the warning would genuinely be more extreme than the oneshot itself. Uh, don't read this if you're under 8, I guess. Though if you're under 8 I'm not sure you should be on Tumblr.

(If anyone who reads it thinks I should, lemme know)

Don Quixote is pronounced "Key-ho-tey, btw. It's a surprise tool that will help us later.

Enjoy what is quite possibly the most fluffy, romantic thing I've ever written!

Amy Rose wasn't used to Shadow being so perky. But it was a lovely surprise.

He perked up when they moved in together. Well, after he got used to his new surroundings. It had been a few months and everyday she came home from resistance-clean up and find that no matter what she had accidently ruined or made messy the night before was spotless when she got back. He was a real sixties housewife.

Last night, she had made a real mess of the kitchen while "rage-baking" as Shadow called it. She was so frustrated that she'd officially resigned from the resistance months ago, but still had files to organize for her replacement. And she didn't want to take it out on the poor girl newly in charge. At least the crepes were good.

But when she walked into the kitchen, it wasn't the clean counters that surprised her. Nor the dishes he was cleaning.

Shadow was singing.

She blinked.

Shadow was singing.

It wasn't like anything she'd heard before. His voice was deep, but not too deep. Sweet, but not too sweet. There's was a light carefree feeling his voice as he sang. She didn't recognize the song.

"Dulcinea, Dulcinea, I see heaven when I see thee, Dulcinea." Dulcinea... She'd never heard a name like that before. "And thy name is like a prayer an angel whispers, Dulcinea, Dulcinea..."

She tried to be slow and quiet, as she stepped closer to him. Unfortunately, there's no sneaking up on the Ultimate Life Form. One of his ears perked up, and he turned to her.

"Hello, Rose," he said happily.

"I didn't know you could sing like that," she said.

"Lot of free time on the ark." He shrugged noncommittally. He turned back to grab another dish, but she stopped his hand before he could get there.

"Why haven't you sung like that before now?"

He didn't seem to have a good answer for that.

"... Never felt like it before."

"What's it from anyway? Hardly sounds like a pop song."

"Man of La Mancha. The musical hit Broadway while me and Maria were on the ark. It's one of my favorites."

"Oh! What's it about?"

Realizing that she wasn't gonna let him keep washing dishes, he faced her and smiled.

"It's about this guy, who calls himself Don Quixote the knight."

"Okay."

"And turns out his just some old nut-job."

"Um... Okay? Does he become a knight later in the story?"

"No, he's just insane. Knights weren't even a thing in his time period."

"You're making it really hard to like this story," she pouted.

"Don't worry, he finds this woman who he thinks is a princess."

"And she's not." Amy said dryly.

"Not in the slightest."

"Then who is-"

"She's a prostitute."

"SHADOW!" He smirked. "Wh- how is this your favorite musical!"

"Well. When he sees her, he asks her name. She says her name is Aldonza. He decides that royalty such as herself could never-"

"She's a prostitute," Amy said, deadpan. Shadow's good mood didn't falter.

"... Could never have the name of a peasant."

"He says, to her..." Shadow then took her chin gently in his palm. She met his Ruby Red eyes, so full of love. "No one as beautiful and kind as you should have a name like that. Your name should be a name befitting of royalty. Like, Dulcinea."

"And... He sings her that love song..." Shadow nodded. "It... Is a beautiful song..." She admitted. Though she wasn't sure if it was the lyrics or just his voice that made her find it so lovely.

Shadow smiles. "He calls her Dulcinea for the rest of the show."

"What does Dulcinea mean? Exactly?"

"Melodic. Sweet, elegant, idyllic... Whichever you prefer." He said all those words like he meant that they defined her.

"Huh..." Amy shook her head, and Shadow pulled away. "But she's just a prostitute."

"She's not just a prostitute. She's a person. She was desperate. She didn't enjoy her life. The place she lived wasn't good. And the work she did wasn't pretty."

"Then why not run away?"

"Running requires money."

"Oh." She looked up at him. "This story sounds sad!"

He shrugged. "A little bit."

"The guy's insane! The girl is miserable, how is this your favorite musical!"

Shadow didn't speak for a moment.

"Well, the man saw things that nobody else did."

"Because he was crazy."

"Sure, but the things he saw weren't bad. He didn't see the world as it was, but he saw it as it should've been. I think there's value in that. Being able to see good in things no one else can. He saw good in her. Even when she didn't see it in herself."

That's when it clicked. He saw good in her, even when she couldn't see it in herself. Amy saw good in Shadow. He didn't believe her. She really had to fight to convince him. It's hard to pinpoint exactly when he changed his mind. But it took years.

"Has this... Always been your favorite movie?"

"Always been up there, but I've recently found a new appreciation for the moral of it all."

"I think you're more like the knight."

"That I'm crazy?"

"No, doofus! That you're kind and romantic!"

"Am I?"

"Yes!" She leaned in for emphasis, grinning. "And you also go around, hearing what everyone calls a girl, only to call her something else because you think it's prettier."

"I have no idea what you're talking about, Rose," he said with a smile.

"How does it end?"

"Why would I tell you that? It would ruin the ending."

"Well you told me everything else!"

"I definitely haven't told you everything else. You hardly know anything."

"Well I know enough!"

"Then why are you asking for the ending?"

"Well, I- ugh!"

"There's a movie version. Why don't we watch that tonight?" Amy stopped to think. She didn't have anywhere else she needed to be. She could just relax with him on the couch until she fell asleep.

"Have you seen it?" She asked.

"Parts of it."

She giggled. "You're on."

Watched that movie recently. I loved it. The person who suggested it to me loves it, and I get why cause it's really good, but also when I first watched it I was just WTFFFF the entire time.

Don Quixote loses a fight with a windmill.

[juneberrie]

you always have been

thinking thoughts. *ೃ༄ this is very self indulgent im not sorry <3 btw the formatting is terrible 😭 also this is 1.5k words im so proud of myself its literally the longest fic i've ever written

pairing: jj maybank x fem!reader

fandom: outerbanks

warnings: swearing, mentions of being drunk, reader kind of pushes jj away, insecure!reader, stressed out!reader, mentions of jj's trash dad, fear of abandonment, sort of a smau? science hw (yes thats a warning science hw sucks), love confession, hurt/comfort <3

jj's instagram is a mess. it alternates between pictures of random objects, pictures of himself, and pictures of our friends.

lately, all of his pictures have been pictures of him and the pogues at keggers and on the boat. without me.

the most recent one is a blurry shot of him and kie at the boneyard. his hair is dripping wet and kie is holding up a red solo cup, beer sloshing over the side. the caption reads, "my brst girl 😋 ilysn kier.carrera" its so misspelled its obvious hes drunk, even without looking at the picture.

—————

↳ comments

-> jb.wifirouter ong your so drunk. ↳ heywpope its "youre" not "your" 💀 and you're durnk too ↳ sarahcamer0n lmaooo durnk

-> kier.carrera lol ilyt jj 💀 ↳ kier.carrera wsit wring emoji ❤️

—————

i groan and shut my phone off. kie knows i like jj. she's heard me rant about him since eighth grade. its fine, though. i need to focus on school. i get up and silence my phone, putting it into a drawer at my desk before going back to the papers sprawled on my bed.

science isn't my best subject, but i need this extra credit to bring my grade up. and, no pressure at all, this stupid extra credit is due by monday, at its literally sunday night. at least its pretty easy. all i have to do is write an essay about newton's laws and how they function in the "real" world. i sigh and open my textbook to the page on the first law, inertia.

as im scribbling down the beginnings of the paragraph about f=ma, my pencil breaks. well, how fucking dandy. i get up and head to my desk to grab a sharpener, and i pass the mirror next to my door.

i cringe away, then force myself to look back. the girl staring back at me is... not kie. not sarah. she's wearing a big oversized t-shirt she stole from jj and some shorts. her nail polish is chipped and her hair is practically crying for escape from the worn scrunchie.

i tear my gaze away and grab the sharpener. the clock on my desk reads 11:11 pm. i remember something kie said about making wishes at 11:11, so i think, why not give it a try? i squeeze my eyes shut and hope my wish gets to whatever magical star angel being is listening.

after i finish my essay, its 12:23 am. i grab my phone from the drawer and see a flurry of texts and instagram notifications assaulting my lock screen.

i ignore the texts — six from kie and eight from jj — and click open instagram.

my homepage is filled with pictures of the pogues at the kegger they're at. i can't help the pettiness that surges up inside me and i click on jj's most recent story, a video of him, kie, pope, john b, and sarah screaming the lyrics to bohemian rhapsody around a campfire.

—————

you replied to their story

yourinstagram looks like you're having fun :)

—————

i feel slightly terrible, but whatever. every single kegger they've been to this past week, i haven't been invited.

a text notification comes down onto my screen. it's from kie. the preview reads "im soo sorru"

what the hell? i immediately click on the text and i almost start crying.

—————

kie kie ml ♡

bro so dnt be mad but like i accidentally told jj that u liked him

im sorry

answer me please idont want yu to be mad

i dd;t mean to i swaer

y/n?? are you mad??

y/n pleeaas answre

im soo sorru

bro wtf.

ik im sorry but we were playing truuth or dsre and plpe asked if i had acrush on anybody and i sadi no i didn't but ik you did and the n jj asked who and im sorry :)

:(*** SORRY

whatever. go enjoy your kegger.

—————

what the everloving fuck. i specifically told her not to tell anyone, especially jj, and she goes and tells everyone and their mother. i've gotten a flurry of texts from pope, john b, sarah, and other pogues i suppose are at the kegger, all asking me if it's true i like jj. and, speak of the devil, jj himself has been texting me nonstop for the past thirty minutes.

—————

golden retriever lookin' mf 😋

haha kie jus told me the funnist shut

wait is she for real

wait n/n yuo like me

like fr fr?

brp answer me pls

y/nnnnnn

are you asleepo r somethinh 💀

y/n if you dpn't answer rn rn im going ovet to yiur house

—————

shit. jj can't come over right now. i look like a mess, and now im fucking crying. my gaze drifts back over to the mirror; my eyes are red and puffy and tears are streaming down my face and dripping down onto my (jj's) shirt.

—————

golden retriever lookin' mf 😋

jj please dont come over just stay at the kegger and have fun

nooo y/n im already on my wsy so its fine

—————

shit shit shit.

i throw my phone across the room and scream into my bedsheets. the pogues already didn't like me anymore; they had been going out and having fun without for weeks now, and now kie tells jj i like him? my life is fucking falling apart.

a knock at my window wakes me up from whatever sad haze i was trapped in for the last twenty minutes. jj's peering in and he smiles when he meets my gaze. i shake my head and turn away from him.

no bother letting him in, he'll probably just tell me that he doesn't like me back and to never talk to him again.

another knock, persistent, sounds from the window. i sigh and turn back.

i open the window but leave the screen up, so jj can hear me but he can't get in. "go away, j."

"nooo. wait, why are you cryiinggg?" he asks, the booze slurring his words.

"nothing. no reason. go away, please, jj," i say, my voice cracking.

his face softens and he seems to sober up a bit. "n/n, please tell me what's wrong. i hate seeing you sad," he whispers. fuck. i can't, i can't with the fucking blue eyes and the soft looks and the whispers. i open the rest of the window, and jj climbs in.

i crawl under the covers of my bed and face away from jj. i feel the bed dip next to me and he lays a warm hand on my back. its so casual, so domestic, that i want to laugh.

"sunshine, what's wrong? is this about what kie said?" he asks, gently rubbing my back.

the dam breaks. tears start flowing out of my eyes and i started shaking.

"it is about what kie said. i like you, jj, i really like you. no, i- i love you! i love you so much. i've loved you since i first saw you in mrs. williams' science class in eight grade and you laughed when she said that iron was discovered by the hittites. and i know you'll never love me back because— well— look at me! im not like kie, im not like sarah. i'm just... me! and i've been trying to pretend like you guys going to keggers everyday without me isn't a big deal because, hey, i'm swamped with school, even though its fucking intercession. and i knew if i told you, you'd hate me and you'd never talk to me again," i sob into my pillow.

jj is silent for a few seconds, still rubbing my back.

"i love you too, sunshine. i've loved you for the entirety of the time i've known you. and, you're right. you're not kie or sarah, but you're you. that's what i love about you. you are unapologetically yourself. and i'm sorry for not inviting you to the keggers. i just, i knew you were swamped and i know you don't really like parties 'nd drinking and shit. and i just want you to know that im so proud of you, honey, and— jesus, y/n. you're the only one for me. you always have been. you're the person who's been there whenever luke did something shitty to me, you've helped me with my homework, and gosh, dare i say it, you've helped me be a better person."

he chuckles. i feel him press a kiss to the back of my neck and gently bring me towards him so i'm basically in his lap. he wraps his arms around me and lays his head in the crook of my neck. we stay together in a comfortable silence for a few moments.

i sniffle. "i'm sorry, j."

"you're not the one who should be apologizing, sunshine. i love you, so much. i'm sorry if i made you feel like i'd never talk to you again or like you weren't enough; you are enough. you always have been."

[beautifulpersonpeach]

BPP, sorry if you've answered this question before but what is your best song from Face?

***

Hi @tabbypuppykitty

I’ve had a rethink. I think Face-off is now my favourite song on the album.

Set Me Free Pt 2 is still top 3, but Jimin’s enunciation on Face-off brings a smile to my face every time I hear it because that man is too damn sassy for his own good lool.

In the latest Suchwita episode, Hobi revealed that Jimin practiced live singing six hours everyday before and during FACE promotions.

Six hours. Every day.

That made me pause. I started thinking about everything that happened during FACE. I don't talk about this at all here because I won't ever share personal pictures and I know I was incredibly lucky and many other people here likely deserved to see him before I did, but I saw Jimin live during his very first shows for FACE.

He was so happy. The joy on his face and the way he worked the crowd... like a fish in water. He gave some of the best performances of the year during FACE promotions. The whole project and the thoughtful way he went about promoting the album, is noteworthy.

(You should watch this if you haven't already)

*

But then I remembered the BS, the way k-pop stans reacted to the album, to the MVs, to the encore stage, the way BTS akgaes indulged in their sociopathy on his account, how BigHit failed (the anger Jimin biases feel is justified but some of y'all are wallowing in it). I remembered a few of Jimin's Wlives, how so much has been going on for him this year, and then tried to fit 6 hours daily practicing into it...

I have to stop myself when I think about Jimin. He has such latent intensity, like a glamour, a force field around him... it's like a black hole that sucks everything, including you, into him and his world. It scares me.

I know I whine about Jimin biases but y'all amaze me ngl. It takes a special fortitude of heart to bias Jimin. This post already sounds incredibly effusive, but I don't believe I'm exaggerating when I say he's a truly beautiful person. It's almost as though the world does not deserve him. It's impossible to not love him, desire him, care for him... want more sooner for him. I see all that, but I also see that man is stubborn as fuck.

He took his time to start work on his solo album. The middle of the Vegas concerts is when he said he suddenly came to his senses, shook himself out of that trance, and earnestly started putting together the FACE project. He'd written songs before, but FACE was its own thing. The personal stories he chose to communicate, the care in lyricism and production, the quality... Jimin created art in FACE and trusted that those who care for nothing but the best, will love it.

That's sexy, but the way he went about it also betrays a conservatism in him. It's a shadow of the edge in him, that thing about him that causes a tinge of anxiety when you watch him too closely.

I'm not sure if I'm making sense, but what I mean to say is you need a special kind of courage to bias and love Jimin. I recognize that. When I write what I do here, I always remember that. I also have very little respect for solos. And those two sentiments aren't mutually exclusive.

But taking it back to Face-off, my favourite thing about it is Jimin's sense of humour and skill coming through in the song, as well as how he enunciates his words. To really hear the switch in his tone, you need to stream in this order:

Like Crazy > Alone > Set Me Free Pt 2 > Face-off

By the time you get to Face-off, Jimin's voice has already gone through every variation possible, but then he brings out a tone I've heard only one other artist do well (Rihanna), and that tone is disgust.

Pure, refined sass. And he's already got the sauciest voice in k-pop.

The melodic and tonal choices Jimin makes at these timestamps fucks with my head:

1:53 - 2:08;

2:16 - 2:25;

2:41 - 2:56....

(lol, at this rate you might as well just listen to the whole song again.) Jimin is fantastic in the whole thing.

Europe is where Jimin belongs, but America would eat Jimin up too. The country already does if we're being real, America already loves Jimin. But given the right concept, Jimin would devour because he always does, and the world should get to see it. I hope I get to see more of it. As I've said before, if you feel inclined to communicate that to BigHit, I strongly suggest you do.

During Suchwita, Hobi showed how he's planned content for fans almost years in advance. It's possible Jimin does this too, planning music and content for fans to see months later... (So we might not learn why he went to London, for months...)

Yeah... I don't have the strength of heart to bias Jimin. Good luck to y'all.

*

...that was kind of a lot lool. So to calm down, Jimin:

*

*

*

*

*

*

*

Anyway, sorry I rambled. Face-off is a really good song and Jimin did an excellent job on it. The whole project is very good so I can't wait for the next songs we get from him. Shit can't get worse than BB deleting D2C sales so on the bright side, we can only go up from here, and for Jimin who already owns the record as the first soloist in history to debut #1 on the Billboard Hot 100, up will be a good spot to be.

Stream Like Crazy, Seven, All Day, and HUH?!

[sharedramblings]

Don't Blame Me

Summary: She wasn't suppose to see it, but Larissa caught you having the performance of your life.

Warning: Second-hand embarrassment might be felt.

Author's note: This is the last fic I've worked on before deciding to create this blog! There's actually another version of this that's already written because I can't make up my mind. So, would anyone be interested to see it?

Edit: The other version

—-—-

Your day off was currently being spent reminiscing and smiling to yourself as you were busy looking through pictures upon pictures of you and Larissa, in various dates and scenery.

A lot of the images are solo pictures of her. Some she's aware of and is smiling at the camera, others you took without her knowledge. You equally cherish both. How the former allows you to see that sweet smile you so love any time, and the latter grants you different versions of her– how she observes and looks around, how she looks when she can barely contain herself, how she is when she's caught off guard– among many others.

Then there were pictures of the two of you, beaming at the camera, holding each other's hands, hugging, selfies, a few candid shots, shared kisses forever captured thanks to the photo, and a whole lot of standing on landmarks you've visited to commemorate that specific day.

A dreamy sigh escapes you, overpowered by the love you have for the woman. A love that runs so deep, ever growing and expanding.

The music you chose as you swipe through the pictures lingered in the air, and you let yourself zone out, the emotions you have for the principal still swirling actively inside you.

You're sure she's in her office, busy working and running the school. It's still hours from lunch so you can't exactly just go up and about to visit her. You don't want to bother her when she's working, especially since you know how important her job is for her. But you can barely contain your feelings for her. Looking through the photographs triggered such a drastic flow to your emotions. You needed an outlet, and no, it couldn't be the woman who got you feeling like a lovesick teenager because one, she's occupied, and two, your restraint and inherent shyness are still intact and firmly holding you.

That's when the song changed to another, Taylor Swift's voice ringing in the quiet space.

Don't blame me, love made me crazy

If it doesn't, you ain't doing it right

Lord, save me, my drug is my baby

I'll be usin' for the rest of my life

That's exactly what you feel right now. Your whole body is thrumming with adoration for her, and it's making you feel crazy and lightheaded. You look at the time, ensuring that you've got plenty of it before you go have lunch with the said gorgeous lady you happen to be with.

And so you've decided. You can't truly contain the emotions within you any longer. What better way to release it all than to sing it out with a song?

The next lines don't really connect with you. No, you haven't been in many relationships, let alone with guys. You have been in exactly two before Larissa. One when you were in university, and the other one is just an almost kind of thing, a mutual understanding of sorts. Despite that, you still sang along, restless in your feet as you feel the beat of the song.

For you, I would cross the line

I would waste my time

I would lose my mind

They say, "She's gone too far this time"

Thank heavens that Larissa's quarters– no that's not exactly right– your shared space were a bit far off the busy part of the academy. The thick walls also allowed for a great amount of privacy, one that you're more consciously aware and thankful for as you started growing loud in volume.

You gradually let the lyrics carry you, your movements free of your usual calm and collected demeanor.

Don't blame me, love made me crazy

If it doesn't, you ain't doing it right

Lord, save me, my drug is my baby

I'll be usin' for the rest of my life

You were so caught up on the song singing your heart out that you can't help but close your eyes, mind racing with thoughts of her. You were certain that you're about to lose your mind, and oh what a delightful reason that is– to lose your mind because of love. Because of her.

—

Larissa walks the path towards her quarters, quite lost in thought as she thinks back where she could have placed the missing folder. Maybe she forgot to take it with her after bringing it home last night. It won't hurt to check. The reason for her spontaneous trip back to your shared home was a hassle for her, but the prospect of surprising you makes her smile.

Once she's in front of the door, she did her best to stealthily open it, careful not to make any noise that could have given her presence away.

Her eyebrows shot up when she heard you singing loudly, the music only slightly heard in the background. She made her way towards the bedroom where she suspects she can find you, the excitement she felt for possibly surprising you turned into excitement of seeing you like this.

She stopped at the doorway, her heart immediately bursting at the sight of you. Your left hand serves as an impromptu microphone, while your right hand punctuates every word with their unrestricted movements.

She only seldom sees you so carefree, so full of energy, and so uninhibited, that moments like this are something she deeply treasure. You don't always burst with this kind of energy, but when you do, she loves to watch and indulge you. Nevertheless, she loves you either way. She loves you when you're quiet and reserved, and she loves you still when you're buzzing with excitement and has lots of mischief to do.

Hearing you sing aloud like this was a first. Sure, she's heard you sing. But it's more of humming a tune, whispering the lyrics, mumbling along when you're not that familiar with a song yet. This one's a lot different than that. She can hear you stress the words and feel it like it's yours.

I get so high, oh

Every time you're, every time you're lovin' me

You're lovin' me

She follows your every move to the rhythm, and all she wanted was to kiss you senseless but she held back. No matter how difficult it was. She'd rather hear you through the end of the song than interrupt you so abruptly.

Trip of my life, oh

Every time you're, every time you're touchin' me

You're touchin' me

You suddenly turned towards her, and she couldn't stop the sudden sharp intake of breath at being found out. Her body went rigid for a second, but relaxed once again as she saw your eyes were closed.

There was a beat of just the instrumental before you sang again.

Every time you're, every time you're lovin' me

God, it's taking every ounce of restraint to stop herself from running to you. She bites at her bottom lip, eyes shining with love and admiration.

You took a deep breath, preparing for what she feels is an intense part of the song.

Oh Lord, save me, my drug is my baby

I'll be usin' for the rest of my life

Usin' for the rest of my life, ohh-oh

You sang that last line as if your life depends on it, all your remaining emotions poured in. Your head was tilted upwards, right arm extended outward.

Don't blame me, love made me crazy

If it doesn't, you ain't doin' it right (doin' it right, no)

This was when you opened your eyes, immediately being made aware of the presence on the doorway. You visibly jumped, face heating up with embarrassment when you see Larissa beaming and grinning at you. You scrambled to pick up your phone and pause the song, but the hand that snatched your phone has other plans.

She was so close, and you feel like you're going to die out of the embarrassment of being watched. You were so caught up in your own world that you haven't noticed her presence like you normally would.

"That's a lovely performance" You bit your lip as you slightly pushed her away, your breathing uneven from the exerted effort in singing and from her sudden appearance.

She caught your arm before you could retract it, pulling you even closer. You didn't dare look at her, aware that her gaze is on you.

"How long have you been there?"

"Sadly not long enough for my taste." You groaned at her response, hiding yourself from her in the crook of her neck. You've already embarrassed yourself enough in front of her, you'd rather not give her the opportunity of seeing how flustered you are.

She chuckles and you circle your arms in her waist, her arms wrapping you in return. Her hands rub your back, and for a while you thought she'll let it go.

"Was that dedicated to me?" Her question made your eyebrows knit in confusion.

"Who else would it be?" you whispered, your breath skating over her skin.

"Hmm, just wanted to hear you say it." You thought that was the end of it. That the following seconds would be spent in a silent and warm embrace, but you're wrong. Because she's only started.

"Is this truly the trip of your life, darling?" You whined, feet stomping on the floor once you realized what she was referring to. You didn't think it was possible but your face heats up even more. She can feel how hot your face was and relishes at the feeling.

"I'm your drug?" she gasped as she felt you pinch her side but she was relentless. "Oh, and I'm your baby? Hmm, please tell me more" Her voice was so full of light teasing it's further digging the already deep bashfulness you're feeling.

"Stooop!" Your one-word reply was muffled in her skin and she giggled as she felt the second pinch. Oh, how quickly she can turn you into such a lovely mess.

"May I know when's the next one? I'd love to be earlier to watch from the beginning" You only shook your head, biting her neck lightly. She lets out a yelp, not expecting that bit to happen.

You lift your head in its hiding place, finally having built enough courage to look at her. "You weren't supposed to be here"

You busy your teeth with your bottom lip when she doesn't respond. She was just staring at you, lovingly, softly. And you can't and don't want to break the moment despite the lingering embarrassment you still feel.

"What are you doing here?" Now that you've calmed a whole lot, your mind has finally had the time to assess the situation.

She shakes her head, "Doesn't matter." The papers in her office says otherwise, but that's not important right now. Her hands went from being clasped around your back to cupping your cheeks.

"Can I kiss you, darling?" She didn't have to ask. She could just go for it and you'll allow her completely. So instead of answering, you decided to close the distance. She picked up on it and met you halfway, her lips seeking yours in a passionate kiss.

The emotions she felt as she watched you earlier were poured in that kiss. Long, passionate, and absolutely addicting. She kissed you with so much fervor that you're slightly dizzy when it ends.

"I love you" your heart melts with how soft she said it.

"I love you too, Larissa" you placed a kiss on the left of her chest where her heart lies. Something you always do when those three words are uttered. Like some sort of seal on the promise of what that love entails.

"I'll see you at lunch?"

"Of course." she replied. You smiled at her, only for it to be changed into a glare and a pout when she added, "Any chance of knowing the title of the song?"

You pushed her away and she laughed at your reaction.

"Darling, you know I won't stop unless you tell me"

You shook your head stubbornly. It's better for your sake if she doesn't know. You were certain you'll hear the song playing again and again if she got her hands on the title. But you were also sure that she meant it when she said that she won't stop.

"Alright. I'll just ask you again later. See you after..." she checks her watch, "two hours. I'll be in my office" You nodded and accompanied her to the door after she retrieved something, exchanging a sweet peck in the lips before bidding her bye again.

You close the door when her retreating form was no longer visible, leaning on the back of it with a sigh. You can't believe you were caught, but her charmed reaction almost makes up for it. But then again, the whole thing happened because of her so you decided it's quite alright.

You can vividly imagine now how lunch would go. It would include Larissa humming the tune of the song as best as she could remember, asking you how a certain line goes, repeatedly inquiring for the title of the song, bringing up something you did while you're singing that she simply can't get enough of, and you would be glaring and whining and smiling as your face flushed from her insistence. You shook your head fondly as you feel your heartbeat speed up. You can't wait for lunch despite how you imagine it going.

[cherrylng]

Upcoming Victories UK ‘00 - Muse - Matt Bellamy interview [BUZZ (November 2000)]

"'Compared to dance music, nothing great ever comes out of rock music, no matter how many years we wait. I'm going to start a new rock scene here.' That's what I thought when I started MUSE."

Out-of-this-world heaviness, out-of-this-world dramaturgy. What is the frustration, sense of purpose and impulse of MUSE and Matthew Bellamy to shake up a situation where only sing-along music can survive?

Text by Shinji Hyogo Interpretation by Makoto Takami

I noticed that in every issue I wrote things like "The new UK bands today are all sing-along bands that haven't been able to escape the influence of Oasis even though it's been years since their breakthrough" or "their sound is not as strong as dance or American heavy rock". There are issues where I don't write about it, but I write about it in the JAPAN record reviews that month. Do I want to make enemies with UK rock fans? Do I really hate them that much? When Coldplay's new album arrived, I was happy and listened to it every day. I also liked the new REEF stuff. I praised Placebo in the record reviews in the previous issue, and I love Oasis to begin with. What's so bad about it, me?

I thought about it and realised that the point is that I don't like the "same" thing. I've written about this before, but when I listened to the songs of creators from all over the world who uploaded their own work to MP3.com, I felt really depressed because they were all Aphex Twin imitations. Why do they go to the trouble of being "the same" or "under the influence of XXX" when they are in a field where they can do whatever they want with their music? Isn't it a waste? Isn't it uninteresting for both the performers and the listeners? First of all, you can't win if you do the same thing. I can't say that I haven't been influenced by someone else, or that I haven't written similar texts to someone else, but I think so with a sense of self-discipline. This was the lead sentence of an interview with MUSE. It is said that Radiohead and Nirvana have a strong influence on the band, and they admit it, and in fact, when I listen to the band, I certainly think so. However, I can't help but feel that I can see "beyond" the dramatic, dynamic, heavy and loud feel of their songs, the fragile beauty of their melodies, the sheer skill of their playing and vocalisation, and above all, the swell and dynamism of their sound.

There are strong sounds. MUSE's sound is strong too. However, the fact that this strength is different from alternative, (current) punk or American heavy rock is clearly expressed in the first album "SHOWBIZ" released earlier this year and the Japanese compilation "RANDOM 1-8" released in time for the band's visit to Japan in the middle of this month. Whether in melody, lyrics, or sound, what MUSE is aiming for is a sound with an intensity and drama of a type never seen before. And that's what makes you want to expect "maybe they'll change the current status quo". Matthew Bellamy answered.

I think the loud, heavy feel of MUSE's sound is what sets you apart from other UK guitar bands. 「Yeah.」

And I think there are two reasons for that. One is that American heavy rock and dance music are first of all overwhelming in terms of the intensity of sound, whereas UK rock today is not, so you had to get the intensity of sound to match it. And the second is that you needed that kind of strong sound to give form to the world that you genuinely wanted to express. 「Yeah, I think the second opinion is right. I needed that kind of sound to create what I wanted and to make music that accurately expresses my feelings, how I feel about life and so on. I've tried to make the sound as intense as possible in order to make music that is sincere and honest. I also want to convey my feelings and emotions in a way that I can enjoy. So yeah, I think you're right about that. But it's not that I felt the need to do it to get rid of the weakness of the UK rock sound. We were born and brought up far away from the mainstream British music scene, so it was a very natural progression for us to start playing this kind of music. In fact, we didn't really know much other than this kind of music growing up. I think the main reason is that we grew up in a remote and isolated place where we were shut out from the outside world. When you grow up in a place like that, you develop a unique worldview.」

Like a rare species of animal that evolved on its own on a remote island? 「(laughs) That's terrible. No, I listen to all kinds of music without preconceptions. As far as I remember, the first music I liked when I was a kid was blues music. I think I was 10 or 11 years old, and I was first into blues piano, like Ray Charles. And I learnt guitar by listening to Robert Johnson. Then, when I was 13 or 14, I became interested in more indie British music, like Wedding Present, Senseless Things, Mega City Four, and Sultans of Ping FC」

What?!?! You liked the Sultans? (Note: A B-grade band that existed in the mid-90s and was like a combination of early Manics and Iggy Pop and the Stooges.). I've interviewed them a lot. 「Oh yeah? Did you like them?」

I loved them, but when they didn't make it, I thought, "I knew it" (laughs). 「Hahahaha. So yes, I was almost exclusively focused on British music at the time. But when I was around 15 or 16, I started listening to American music too. Like Nirvana and Sonic Youth. Then I travelled around continental Europe for a while, and that's when I started listening to a lot of European folk music. I got really into Spanish flamenco guitar and started studying it myself. And also Greek music. I was also influenced by a lot of Eastern European bands and Southern European music, as well as a lot of Irish folk music. My mother is from Ireland, so we had a lot of folk music from there at home. So yeah, I've been open to all types of music.」

All of this is reflected in the sound of MUSE, isn't it? 「Right? (laughs)」

So it wasn't just a subconscious thing like, "I grew up in a remote area, so this is how it is," but you actually wanted to play music that was completely different from the mainstream scene? 「I think so, yes. The music scene in the UK was getting pretty boring at the time. There was some good dance music coming out, but there wasn't much interesting stuff going on in the rock scene. So I think that was definitely part of what inspired me to think, "I want to put out a record. No one's going to come out any time soon. Then I'll start a new rock scene here". So much was missing in rock at that time. I'm happy that some good bands have finally started to emerge recently.」

Also, I think MUSE's music and sound are very complete and dramatic. Is this something that comes naturally to you? 「Hmm…… No, I don't always make music with conviction. So it's not like I do it intentionally, it just comes naturally, or that when I make music, it sounds that way. It's not like I want a certain sound and plan it out in advance, I just write songs that honestly express how I feel. So for me, it's very personal music, but maybe new listeners will see a completely different perspective, or a dramatic side to it, like you said. For me, it's a very personal piece of music that expresses my own thoughts and feelings in the sound. However, the album I'm currently preparing will contain many different types of songs. For example…… There are some songs on there that have an unusual positivity to them, which I can't really describe. What I mean by "unusual" is that they actually sound very positive when I sing them, but they're also the hardest and most emotional songs for me to sing in a way. Maybe it's because it's so positive that it becomes hard. There will be some songs like that on the next album, and it's the first time I've ever approached songs like this, but I'm really enjoying it.」

If that's what happens when you make it naturally, doesn't that mean that your life and your life itself up until now has been dramatic in a way? 「Yeah, it certainly hasn't been normal so far. I feel like I've travelled a very long way. And I feel like I've come this far without really being aware of what's going on. I don't really know where I'm at or where I'm going. But for me, that kind of situation feels really good. I really enjoy getting lost and not knowing where I'm going. I don't know how it's going to end or when it's going to end, so it's kind of fun in a way. It's like my emotions and everything else is a blur, and that's what's really interesting. Even now, I'm so busy that I can say I don't have time to rest at all, and I feel like I don't know what's going on, but I think the more chaotic it gets, the better the music gets.」

Do you feel that you are becoming more and more sensitive to those vague and unpredictable states? 「I think I'm becoming more and more aware of them. And what I like about that feeling, and why I like it, is that I'm the kind of person who thinks that situations where you can predict what's going to happen next are uninteresting. As soon as I'm in a situation like that, I get bored and start looking for something else to do. That's why…… Yeah (laughs).」

So you're the type of person who likes to put yourself in unpredictable situations on purpose. 「Yes, that's true, haha. That's for sure (laughs).」

I understand (laughs). By the way, you've said in the past that you have a great distrust of "communicating through some kind of system", whether it's the media, the internet or religion, and it shows in your lyrics. What is the reason for your dislike and distrust to such an extent? 「Hmm…… I think it's because I grew up with a constant sense of "something's not quite right" about developments and changes in the world. But I can't really explain what that "something" is. So I'm trying to learn more about the world, about the system of government, about the system we grew up in, so that I can explain it better. Why is it that the power structures, for example, the World Trade Organisation (WTO), seem to be more and more in step with America? I'm trying to learn about the impact of that kind of system on the rest of the world. Maybe in doing so, I'm trying to learn more about that sense of "something's wrong" that I've had since I was a little kid. I'm looking at it carefully, trying to find out if it's just a fantasy or if it's real. But I think anyone can feel that kind of discomfort when they watch the news, or read a newspaper. You can feel it from all media, and you can also feel it when you talk to people who don't understand the hidden, subtle messages the media give out. When you realise that there are so many people who can't read what's being said, who don't realise that there's another movement going on behind the scenes, it makes you realise that you have to learn more.」

Does this mistrust stem from structural problems in the system? 「It's largely down to how people are informed. For example, the other day there was a huge demonstration in London against the WTO, and 26,000 people marched through the streets of London. By the way, I think 50,000 policemen were mobilised (laughs). Anyway, the media misreported that march. All the news programmes said that "everyone was at the demonstration for a riot". And that "hardly anyone turned up". They deliberately downplayed the fact that it was a very small demonstration. This is a classic example of media control of information to the public, which they probably thought was harmful to the state. Also, in the UK we have recently had a fuel shortage problem, and when the price of petrol went up, everyone started to strike at once. And what happened was that people barricaded themselves in refineries all over the place. And at one of the refineries, the police force opened the gates of the refinery and let the trucks out, and the press photos of the scene showed the gathered crowd cheering and clapping, as if they were happy that the petrol was being taken away. But in fact they were on strike there, trying to stop the petrol from being taken out. But the press just happened to film everyone clapping and made it look like they were happy that the petrol was being taken out. There were hundreds of other refineries protesting, and only one of them happened to be on the news, and they just happened to take a picture of the crowd applauding as the petrol was taken out. It was nuanced, as if the strike had failed. In fact, after the photo was published, all the refineries bowed to the pressure and stopped protesting. So, I think that in certain areas of news, the people who are involved in the press are manipulating information, especially in America, and I think it's done on a much larger scale.」

"I'm acquainted with the sing-along type bands like Coldplay, and we're actually good friends. I think it's great that they've had success. But when it comes to music, we're definitely marginalised."

So for you, does the process of pursuing your music and expressing it as a piece or performance involve a feeling of being in struggle with someone or something? 「I think it does, yes. I get confused and sometimes I don't even know how I feel or what I'm thinking about. You can think about love, or religion, or science, or the meaning of life, or simpler things that are not that complicated, but when you have to make decisions, when you have to figure out what is the right thing to do, you can get confused. Moral standards are not as clear-cut now as they used to be. In the absence of religion, moral standards become ambiguous. So there's a lot of confusion when you have to make the right decision, and confusion about what the right answer is, and that's what I'm trying to express in a lot of our songs.」

You could say that rock ‘n’ roll has been singing about themes like "despair" and "confusion" for a long time now. However, such an approach tends to lead to a dead end at some point, but I think your music is unique in that it doesn't sound claustrophobic in that way. No matter how naïve the songs are, the sound is always bold. 「Yeah. That's probably…… I just think that…… Hmmm…… I think it's because the music is flowing with me. I don't know, it's always flowing, or it's always reflecting the situation at the time. So as long as interesting changes and unpredictable things keep happening, I think the music will always be interesting.」

For example, the new bands that have been coming out of the UK recently, such as Travis, Coldplay, and even Toploader, are all sing-along bands in the vein of Oasis, Manics, and Verve, without the intensity and aggression. What do you think about that situation? 「I still can't find a band that plays the kind of music we do. Like you said, I think most of the bands are sing-along type, and that's been the trend for most UK bands for a long time. But of course I know people in those bands, and they're all very nice guys and we get on well, and I'm honestly happy that they've had such success. It's not the kind of music I really love, but that's fine. I prefer music that makes the listener more passionate, more energetic.」

Are you aware that you are quite marginalised in the current scene? 「I don't think it's the same as being "marginalised". I know them and we get on well with them. But when it comes to music, yes, I think we are marginalised. Because there is no one else.」

I think the intensity and heaviness of MUSE's sound can be attributed to your experience of American alternative rock as a listener, but having seen you live twice, my opinion is that there is actually a strong heavy metal influence. What do you think? 「……Heavy metal? I think it's one of the two extremes…… Wait a minute…… Hmm…… I don't really know, Chris and Dom listen to a lot of that kind of music, so maybe that's an influence. But I've never really listened to heavy metal. I like playing heavy music, sure (laughs). I like the dynamic transition between playing really heavy and playing really mellow. One minute you're standing still on stage, the next you're flying around. In short, I just like doing different things. I guess that's why some of the songs sound like they're influenced by heavy metal. But I don't think there's any band that I actually listen to on a daily basis that I would call that.」

I understand. But your main guitar is based on the Music Man's Eddie Van Halen model, isn't it? 「Yeah, yeah.」

I think it is very rare to find a British guitarist who uses a Floyd Rose nowadays (Note: Floyd Rose is a tremolo arm that was very popular during the metal boom in the mid-80s). 「Hahahaha. That guitar. I actually smashed that guitar at a festival in Leeds and threw it into the audience*. So, well, I don't have that guitar anymore. And in terms of stage performance, when I used to go to see bands as a kid, I always wanted to see a show where the band was just jumping around like crazy and giving everything they had on the stage. That's why I'm so fed up with British bands these days. They just stand there and look bored, like they're not enjoying themselves. But in my case, when I go out on stage, I really enjoy it, and I think that joy shows in my desire to let everyone know that we're having fun too. I think having fun is a wonderful thing, just as much as pursuing intensity and seriousness. In the case of MUSE, the music itself is often very serious and intense, so I think it's interesting to contrast that with a positive, energetic stage show. I think it makes a good contrast to the music.」

Translator's Note: This is my first time scanning the pages from BUZZ magazine, a now defunct magazine issue that was a subsidiary under ROCKIN'ON. The shape and quality of the magazine are more akin to a photobook with interviews included, really. But overtime, it really did became more of a photobook before it was sadly discontinued.

* Finding the guitar that matches Matt's description was a bit hard, but my guess was that it was a Peavey EVH Wolfgang. Matt owned two of such guitars back then, with the differences being that one was partially covered in grey tape and the other was completely covered in black tape. It was the one with the grey tape that Matt smashed it and threw into a crowd. A photographer picked it up, sold it on eBay, someone repaired it, and it was auctioned several times up until it was last seen on auction in 2018 before its listing was removed.

Now, finding when and which festival in Leeds that Matt smashed and threw the guitar to the audience is harder. There were 2 festivals in Leeds that Muse performed in August 2000 that were just 3 days apart and there are no descriptions available to pinpoint the event down. So it either happened on August 26th during Carling Weekend or on August 28th during the Leeds Festival.

Do support me on my Ko-fi! ☕

[wellhalesbells]

20 questions for fic writers

Tagged by @piratefalls! Yay, wasting time - I've been doing so much of that today and thank you for giving me another way to! (Seriously, I would've just been watching more Youtube compilations without you.) That's probably why these answers are so long. Procrastination? Wellllll don't mind if I do!

How many works do you have on ao3? 154

What's your total ao3 word count?

1,280,205

What fandoms do you write for?

Primarily Teen Wolf and Harry Potter. HP was my original homeslice and I kind of sharpened my teeth on fic-writing in general there, found what I liked and didn't like, how to engage with fandom, what I found attractive and what turned me off (for characters and plot beats), honed my craft and made my mistakes there and then with the advent of AO3 and the finding of Teen Wolf, I feel like I blossomed and built a home and am hopefully making fewer oopsiedoosles. Though I have also written a fic or so for: Hannibal, The Meg, Mr. Robot, X-Men, Star Trek, and Breaking Bad.

Top five fics by kudos:

There's Monsters at Home, Sterek, Teen Wolf. (15,285)

Time to Eternity, Drarry, Harry Potter. (8,416)

Option C) Some Bad Guys are Werewolves, but Not All Werewolves are Bad Guys, Sterek, Teen Wolf. (7,759)

Of Bananas, Babies and Buzzkills, Sterek, Teen Wolf. (5,134)

Instructions for Dancing, Sterek, Teen Wolf. (5,099)

Do you respond to comments?

Not anymore. Occasionally one that asks a direct question I'll answer, if that answer isn't already somewhere on or in the fic.

Though the last one I answered was someone who didn't read my tags or notes, telling me I didn't warn for something that was in the tags and notes, and I was so polite, like, "How can I make this clearer?" instead of saying, "#!@%^&$@$@#^$%&$^&^&$%^@#$%" like I fucking wanted to and they then said: "Oh yeah, I didn't read any of that, guess you don't need to change anything." Which was exactly what I expected would happen and I took the time to answer because I want more than anything to teach that person a lesson, even though I am absolutely certain they learned nothing from the interaction. But I tried, I did my part, and I wasn't even an asshole about it. (Please, please, please, the amount of times I've been told in the snarkiest damn fashion to tag for something that is already fucking tagged...... like, how do I have to say: read the tags before snidely chastising me for what isn't in them?? And it's not like.... I used different language or anything, they will ask me to tag for the EXACT DAMN TAG already on the fic. My collection of these comments is genuinely getting out of hand.)

And there is one I kind of want to answer that I got in the last month or so because it's one of the nicest and most vulnerable things I've ever been told but there aren't enough letters, or strong enough ones, or big enough ones to hold all the gratitude and care that wants to pour into them so I just... haven't.

What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

Hrm, I think these are just the most obvious of those and if I actually had to sit with this and go through my catalogue of fic, I would come up with a way more off-center answer because the angst is much subtler but harder hitting but that sounds like it would take brain power and, wow, is it that late already *coughs*

Either I Smoke My Friends Down to the Filter or But the Mess Prevails. I think maybe the latter because it's kind of triumphant in ISMFDttF, Stiles stands up for himself, but in BtMP they both want to be together but it's just another way for Derek to punish himself if they are.

What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

Similar caveat to the one above as I'm not really focusing on ending (because more brain power) as much as just happy overall. Either [Hilary Duff Lyric Redacted] or Instructions for Dancing - they are both just fluff bombs almost entirely from start to finish.

Do you get hate on fics?

Mostly no. There's one fic that I have comments turned off on (THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR THIS FUNCTION, AO3, 10000000% THIS FIC WOULD NOT STILL EXIST IF NOT FOR YOU) because people would yell things at me I already explicitly stated I agreed with? Like I wrote a fic for a fest (back when I wrote in a lot fests, lol), it was a dark prompt and I can't remember if the prompter wanted a happy ending or if it was a stipulation of the fest that it couldn't end badly but it's a dark prompt so while I could get the two characters to the point of co-parenting, I did not get them back together. And the comments I mainly got were: how dare you get them the fuck back together? To which I was like: um, I didn't, also if I was forced to keep going with this fic, this character would end up with this one instead. And then I got a deluge of comments that were like: how dare you get them back together!? And for a while, I explained that you read into it, which is understandable as - to satisfy whomever's requirement - it is an impression I wanted you to walk away with, but as you'll notice at no point are they back together or romantically involved again, they're in the same room and have reached a ceasefire, that's it. And that's as friendly as I see that relationship getting, and no one read any of that and kept yelling at me for the same reason and mentally I was like: fuck all of you, either the fic goes or I do so I turned off the comments so I wouldn't delete it. I find since commenting is off (or "hidden" rather, I can still see it and have the option to approve or nuke it), people have to really engage with a) what I've already replied before and b) whether or not it's worth it to leave a review that will literally only be seen by me. Suddenly everyone has reading comprehension and no one is just yelling to yell because the only one you're engaging with is *jazz hands* me, and I am obviously not the audience for that.

Do you write smut?

Yep!

Craziest crossover:

I have a Hunger Games/TW one that is one of two unfinished fics on AO3 because every time I even think about it, it intimidates me. And since I don't read crossovers, I have no idea how you're supposed to do them or how much of the other IP you can take on without it seeming like you've just rewritten with different characters or how much you should change when everyone knows what you're working from anyway - it's all a mystery to me and I am flummoxed by it.

Have you ever had a fic stolen?

People post my old HP shit that no longer exists on the internet to Wattpad quite a bit and I am not savvy enough to figure out how to get it down. The few times I've contacted people who posted it under my name to take it down, instead just remove my name and fully pretend it's theirs. On some, I've found the people on LJ who have saved the fic in question and are giving it out and quietly asked them to stop because they were ending up as stolen fic on Wattpad.

Have you ever had a fic translated?

Yes, many!

Have you ever co-written a fic before?

Em and I have started one but never finished - it's me, I'm Mr. Ambrose: "I start, I don't finish things."

All time favorite ship?

I think it's Stiles and Derek, man??? I don't know, I have a lot of niche ones too that I feel like if there were more content/interest, they would be it but there isn't sooooo....

What's a wip you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

That THG/TW fic - it scares me so much. Like, who was that confident girl who didn't understand things at all and was like: yeah, that's fine? Don't know her. PvW - I have a lot written in the future and for the next chapter, plus an outline, it's just a matter of getting my attention to stay on it and I have the next chapter of WDHGsGA written and an outline for the next two, I just don't want to post it until it's totally finished so I don't have to worry about losing the atmosphere/tone again and, again, I just have to get my focus back to it but the chances of me letting that writing go totally down the drain? Unlikely.

What are your writing strengths?

Um, I think I have a good understanding of how humans work. I think writing is definitely made a lot easier when you have a handle on the psychology and a gut sense for people. It's not hard to craft fake scenarios when you have a pretty decent understanding of how people would react in them.

What are your writing weaknesses?

Grammar-wise, commas throw me completely. I have no idea where they're supposed to go and I do my best, okay?! I really only got Florida public school education on this and it was: wherever you feel like you should have one, do that.

More generally, I also feel like I don't have the same needs to satisfy as a large percentage of readers - I need a relationship at the core of a fic to feel significant and weighty to want to write a story about it, but that doesn't mean it needs to survive to the end of said fic or that characters need to hit certain relationship milestones for it to feel worthwhile to me. I think this sometimes leads me to endings that some people feel are unsatisfying because I got what I needed but maybe some readers didn't?

Thoughts on dialogue in another language?

Totally neutral. Doesn't bother or thrill me to any extent.

First fandom you wrote in?

Harry Potter.

Favorite fic you've written?

Favorite? That's hard. I'm, as mentioned, super shitty at finishing things so the fact that TMaH is completed - even without going into any of its content (all of which is made to order, absolutely my favorite stuff) - makes it a top contender.

I also still really love A Fine Foray into Fashionable Fellatio, the last Harry Potter fic I wrote, which was Draco/Ron. I love that to kick my brain into gear, I would start mentally painting the scenes, from oranges and reds to beiges and cool winter blues - I don't know I've ever used color so much in anything. It hasn't worked since and I think it's because - having been away from those characters and that fandom for so long - I had such a crystal clear image of them and because Draco, especially, was so different from how he's usually pictured in fic/fanart (curly-haired, absolutely swank as fuck Muggle style) that the lines were so defined it was easy to paint within them.

And I think my favorite writing piece right now is He Speaks in Petals. It's such a short fic and I reread it in the last year or so and it's so much more lyrical than I remember. I knew that was what I was going for and I did not think I managed it but it's got some really soft, kind whimsy to it that I like a lot and find very calming and reaffirming.

No pressure tagging @kikiroo, @rosieposiepuddingnpie, @literaryoblivion, @yodas-yo-yo, @clotpolesonly, @callunavulgari, @andavs, @i-sveikata, @alocalband !

[puropoly]

Hi!!!

I love your DN art so much, it gives me will to live, it gets me through the day.

I wanna draw like you oh my god you have this storyboard artist kind of style. Effortlessly expressive and dynamic.

Can I worship you? Jk jk (or am I?)

Your A is the best interpretation of this character I have ever seen. I love her.

I have some questions if you have a minute or two 🥺

Can you give me 3 favourite DN fics?

Do you have musical associations for characters (especially B)?

How do you personally feel about L and about Mikami?

What is your favourite food and day of the week?

Please never stop clowning ! 🤡❤️

This is extremely nice of you, thank you !! it's been ages since I've drawn canon DN stuff...

Thank you for the sweet message, I know I still have a long path ahead in terms of improvement as an artist but I value your words immensely as they motivate me to go on now, THE QUESTIONSSss...

Fics I remember killed me on sight

This is how I disappear. (gen) 10/10, work of art, made me sit at the edge of my seat. I recommend everything from this author, definitely DO MIND the tags though! it's dark

If you're into AUs and Lawlight, here's one where Light runs for presidency (Those who stand for nothing fall for anything) and one where he's a cryptid investigator (The forest holds strange creatures), they're both awesome in unique ways. Both are explicit, take that into account

If you're interested in reading different interactions and a very unique twist to the canon events where Naomi is the protagonist, Silent Partner, Unifinished Business is amazing and very suspensey

This one is long, immense, ultra suspensey, with a lot of different characters interacting in interesting ways I never thought before, very lawlight and very explicit, (but I read it all in like 3 days because it caught me BAD and was foaming at the mouth during the entire course of it), also was the founding inspiration to my BB brainrot and design-> Nights

I also made a masterpost of all my favourite meronia (melloxnear) fics back when I was balls deep into it

Finally, my AWESOME friends have made abbie x my BB fics for me back in the days which I treasure with my heart, I feel a bit schoopid sharing them because they're basically my OCs and their story remains a secret but they're beautifully written and. I die. I die everytime I remember they did these for me -> First Christmas (explicit), Stand under my Umbrella (short n funny), Just Another Day (sad and short, based on a comic I did years ago)

ANd also, same author as Silent Partner, wrote Dead Letter Office as a gift to me once, and it melted me into a sugary puddle in the ground

Characters and music

Like every other BB kinnie / stan I have my fair share of associated songs, mostly by style and delusion and very few by actual fitting lyrics lol. But here's what I consider his theme song - and also, I headcanon HARD that he has Danny Elfman's voice

How I feel about L and Mikami

L is special to all of us, love the guy, haven't met a single DN fan who doesn't like L. He's just fun and unapologetic which is what I like about him the most.

Mikami I have a hard time caring about, he's just not my usual type of character at all. He's too rigid for me, although he has his unintentional funny side. I also felt he had no chemistry with any other characters, so that made him less interesting for me

Favourite day and week day

I've been very obsessed with cremonas lately : o]

And my favourite day is saturday now, cause I finally get to have some time for myself to exist!!!!!!!!!!!!! and not work!!!!!!!

[an-aphorism]

20 Qs for fic writers

Tagged by @ursae-minoris-world :D

1. How many works do you have on A03? 66 on my regular 31 on my dark account = 97 total

2. What’s your total Ao3 word count? 1,238,070.... oh my god

3. What fandoms do you write for? VLD, but I write the occasional fic for other fandoms when I want to read something and can't find it.

4. What are your top five fics by kudos? - Wildhearted, Balancing Act, What hath night to do with sleep?, Influx, Like Animals We Play Pretend

5. Do you respond to comments? On occasion! I wish I could respond to all of them, but between my day job and writing, I already have the beginnings of a repetitive strain injury, so I do my best to minimize what my hands do unfortunately

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending? The monsters we create, basically just an angst fest

7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending? Most of my fics are HEA. Hmmm maybe With your one wild and precious life, that one really centers around healing and finding happiness

8. Do you get hate on fics? No, actually. Even my dark stuff I think people are too intimidated by to comment lmao. I think I've gotten like 2 neg comments ever? And they just get autodeleted anyway.

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind? *stares at 500k word count on dark Ao3 account*

10. Do you write crossovers? What’s the craziest one you’ve written? Nope. Not against it, just haven't been inspired to

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen? Not that I'm aware of.

12. Have you ever had a fic translated? Hmmm not that I'm aware of?

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before? Many things with my favorite writing partner extra_nsfw

14. What’s your all time favorite ship? YALL KNOW ITS SHEITH

15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will? The Likeness. Could be such a fun idea but the inspiration ran away and hasn't been back. :(

16. What are your writing strengths? Atmosphere, feelings, and sex stuff. I come from a literary and poetry background so lyrical quality and vibes are like.. so my bread and butter and they're the things that are most often complimented too.

17. What are your writing weaknesses? Dialogue and continuity. I wrote spikemoss actually as a practice for dialogue because I have a habit of avoiding dialogue. I've gotten better over time, but it still sometimes just doesn't compare with some banger lines I've read by other authors. Continuity I'm bad at just because my brain can't hold all the details, but this is mostly fixed in draft edits :)

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic? I will run the lines by a fluent speaker. But if I'm writing in English, I use other languages in text sparingly because you will lose some readers who won't know what's going on. It's a balance between representing cultures and the way people really do speak, and not slowing down the immersive experience by a reader having to translate paragraphs of text.

19. First fandom you wrote for? ever? Danny Phantom back way in the years that show was airing

20. Favourite fic you’ve written? Spikemoss. It's my most impressive work to date and I'm really proud of it! I did some really great things in there and live-wrote it, so it was SO challenging to make sure I didn't drop any balls and get to where I wanted to go. It holds a special place in my heart!

Tagging anybody who wants to do this meme!

[faeriecinna]

WIP Questionnaire

Thank you for the tag @buffythevampirelover !

Project.Seraph :)

1. What was the first part of your wip that you created?

The character of Nevaeh was my leap of faith into this one. Previously I had only ever really written horror/thriller and I had always been too afraid to create my own fantasy world, but for some reason I just couldn't leave the idea of my broken little angel alone. The more I imagined her in different scenarios and fleshed out different characters and a plot, I knew I had to write it seriously or I'd never forgive myself.

2. If your story was a TV show, what would the theme song/intro be?

Honestly I really fuck with Plenty by Aeseaes for this one. The whole vibe is immaculate and it really encapsulates the mood of the story through the lyrics.

3. Who are your favourite characters you've made? Why?

I truly love them all for different reasons (except maybe Marco, fuck you Marco.) Though Nevaeh is my sweet innocent angel baby could never do anything wrong ever loml, and Queen Reinette is a favourite because I adore a good villain and I am very proud of the way I've written her character.

4. What other pieces of media do you think would share a fan base for your story?

I'm hoping the same kind of people who tore through Cassandra Clare's The Mortal Instruments will find my books to be worth of a good read. Also my fellow 'Merlin made me realise I was queer' pals. Not quite as high fantasy but I think P.Seraph is sometimes quite reminiscent of The Witcher too.

5. What has been your biggest struggle with your wip?

There are so many scenes that I've already imagined and desperately want to write, so writing everything in between to bridge the scenes together is so painful lmao. What do you mean I have to write about the journey to the castle before I get to write my big dramatic inciting incident???

6. Are there any animals in your story? Talk about them!

A lot of the first half is based in the woodland so many animals are encountered, though crows and various other corvids are a recurring motif. Also a lot of horses! Most characters travel by horse, including my little band of travelling thieves and the Queen's guards. In the marketplace there is also a very well known cat that belongs to the tavern-owner and likes to steal from people's stalls lmao

7. How do your characters get around? (ex: trains, horses, cars, dragons, etc.)

Mostly by foot, by horse, or by a carriage drawn by a horse.

8. What part of your wip are you working on rn?

Still the first draft rn but it's coming along smoothly. I have also been writing Project.Ink and fleshing out Project.Claw so I haven't been dedicating quite as much time to P.Seraph as I would like.

9. What aspects (tropes, maybe?) of your wip do you think will draw people in?

Who doesn't love a good enemies to lovers, right? This story absolutely reeks of betrayal, dark royalty, doomed love, war.... idk it has everything in it that I wanted to read all in one story and I hoped some people could relate

10. What are your hopes for your wip?

Obviously, I hope to be published one day, and if it is, my hope is that it will be one of those books that leaves people reeling after they've read it. I want people to connect to it, to cry over it, to read it so many times it doubles in size. I want people to be as violently in love with my characters as I am and I want people to relate to the story in whichever way they see fit. I want it to mean something to someone. One day. Eventually.

no pressure tags for @melpomene-grey, @goldxdarkness, @darkangel319 :)

Blank under the cut

1. What was the first part of your wip that you created?

2. If your story was a TV show, what would the theme song/intro be?

3. Who are your favourite characters you've made? Why?

4. What other pieces of media do you think would share a fan base for your story?

5. What has been your biggest struggle with your wip?

6. Are there any animals in your story? Talk about them!

7. How do your characters get around? (ex: trains, horses, cars, dragons, etc.)

8. What part of your wip are you working on rn?

9. What aspects (tropes, maybe?) of your wip do you think will draw people in?

10. What are your hopes for your wip?

[sunflowerseedsandscience]

Twenty Questions for Fanfic Writers

Tagged by @numinousmysteries! Thank you!

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

37

2. What's your total AO3 word count?

493,156

3. What fandoms do you write for?

The X-Files, pretty much exclusively.

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

By the Dim and Flaring Lamps

Ripper Weather

She's Beauty, She's Grace

Between Sorrow and Bliss

Someday Your Child May Cry

5. Do you respond to comments?

I do if someone has a question, or if someone comments on the way I've written something in a way that makes me feel like I should explain the choices I made (biggest example was a commenter on BtDaFL who seemed to be viewing the story through a modern lens without taking the time period into account). I wish I did respond to every comment but honestly I get so in my head about it that I end up paralyzed most of the time. But I absolutely read every single one and return to them frequently, especially when my self-confidence is ebbing.

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

Probably the short prompt where I gave elderly Mulder pancreatic cancer?

7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

Most of mine have happy endings but By the Dim and Flaring Lamps was probably the most unambiguously happy since everyone who dies in canon- Melissa, Samantha, Ahab, Bill and Teena Mulder- are all alive and well at the end of it.

8. Do you get hate on fics?

Not really? There was some out-of-the-corner-of-their-mouth sniping about Pequod (not to my face), but it was clear that person didn't understand how character arcs work. Someone sent an anonymous message that BtDaFL was boring, but lots of people find historical fiction boring.

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

Only if it fits into the plot of the story, and only if I can make it match the overall tone of the fic.

10. Do you write crossovers? What’s the craziest one you’ve written?

I have one short Doctor Who crossover on AO3. I also have a Harry Potter crossover where William is a wizard and a wizard friend of Scully's secretly adopts him when she finds out Scully gave him up because she recognizes the phenomena happening around him, but that's never seeing the light of day while I'm still alive.

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Not to the best of my knowledge.

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

Someone asked if they could translate one of mine into Russian but I'm not sure if they did or not.

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

No.

14. What’s your all time favorite ship?

Always gonna be MSR.

15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

That ballroom dancing lessons one is languishing and I doubt I'll get back to it anytime soon, mostly because I have no idea what the rest of the plot was going to be.

16. What are your writing strengths?

Dialogue, plot, and distinct original characters, I think.

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

I'm not very good at making my words beautiful or lyrical. I'm in awe of authors like @aloysiavirgata, @leiascully, and @slippinmickeys whose styles are so fluid and lovely. I feel like mine is often very matter-of-fact and clinical.

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?

I've had to do it once or twice.

19. First fandom you wrote for?

I wrote something about The Land Before Time when I was in elementary school, long before I knew what fanfic was.

20. Favorite fic you’ve written?

Probably But Always Together.

Tagging @leiascully and @mldrgrl if they haven't done it yet!

[annas-hair-donut]

My Favorite 2023 Fanfics

Instead of posting a master list of the fics I published in 2023, I'm just going to give you some of my favorites.

Knock on Wood (Kristanna, T)

“So, like, I’m not really a superstitious guy or anything, you know? But I saw this girl, right, and I’m about to ask her to dance.” He strummed a few times before stopping the strings with his hand and knocking three times on his guitar. “I don’t know, I figure every little bit helps. Couldn't hurt anyway.” A few people clapped and whistled as he strummed the opening to a song Anna hadn’t heard before. Then he smiled. “Maybe y’all can 'Knock on Wood' for me, too.”

I wrote this one for the FHWM Friday the 13th event. It was really fun because I got to set it in a time and place that is near and dear to my heart and I haven't seen many similar AUs. It's also a song fic, and I just had so much fun with it.

Pretty Please (Kristanna, E)

“Show me how bad you want it, Kristoff. Show me how bad you want me to spank you.” “You think I only want to sink my tongue into your $!@# so you’ll spank me?” His smile made her heart flutter as much as his words, but she tested him anyway. “Pretty men say pretty please.’” “You think I’m pretty?” he asked, each word punctuated by a sloppy, wet kiss on her thigh, "when I wear my lace panties?" When she didn't answer, he looked at her with lifted brows and puppy dog eyes. She cupped his cheeks and said, “You're not pretty, Kristoff; you're very pretty."

I wrote this one for the BDSM Exchange. It's not for everyone, but it's probably my favorite fic I've ever written (of all time).

Waffle Waltz (Kristanna, T)

Anna travels to Tromsø, Norway to attend her sister Elsa's wedding, and ends up renting a room with Bulda and her grumpy and resentful son Kristoff, who is the king of waffles. 1. Waffle, Noun: (1) A soft indented cake cooked in waffle iron; (2) Empty or pretentious words 2. Waffle, Verb: (1) Equivocate, vacillate; (2) To blather

This was for the Candy Hearts Exchange. It involved a ton of research and drew on my own knowledge of/experience with folk music and dance, and I consider it to be one of the best (quality-wise) fics I've ever written. I also really love the fun relationship between Anna & Hans.

Hey, Little Girl (Kristanna, E)

Loner Kristoff gets hired by cheerleader Anna’s parents to teach her how to drive because they’ve lost all patience with her. She isn’t what he expects, though, and when he realizes the feelings he’s been harboring for years are reciprocated, he lets down his guard. Then one thing leads to another... and quite possibly the hugest mistake of their lives.

This started as a driver's ed lesson and ended with a prom for Kristanna School Days. In between, I wrote Kristoff probably the most conflicted and tormented I've ever written him (other than Sophisticated Grace). And it was all set to songs by the Ramones! It really has it all, fluff, angst, high school drama, teen pregnancy, first times. Also some of the OCs were really cool.

The Chaise (Gaston x Adam, E)

Adam debates buying a small chaise longue at his local antique shop until he finds out it comes with an extra large delivery man.

I wrote this for my a friend, and TBH I'm still completely tickled by it. Adam seduced Gaston through flattery and it was just so much fun to write!

The Moment I Bit My Lip (Kristanna, E)

Anna shivered as she packed her suitcase. It was winter, the furnace was broken, and they’d run out of firewood. And Kristoff had run out of time. Based on "Love Me Harder" by Ariana Grande ft. The Weeknd

This was a reader request. It was a huge challenge because I tend to write more female-dominant stuff and the song lyrics screamed Kristanna, but at the same time didn't really fit with the kinds of things I usually write. So I had to get a little creative and I absolutely love that. Anyway, I came up with one of the coolest AUs I've written and I absolutely adore this piece.

Boom, Clap! (Kristanna, E)

A sharp pain sears across Kristoff’s face from the force of Anna’s hand slapping him to the present. Stars twinkle just inside his field of vision as he rubs his cheek, and his heart beats faster in excitement. He hasn’t felt this good in years. Until an irate voice says, “What the fuck?” Anna stands in front of him, angrier than ever, and he smiles a little more. “You think that’s funny?” she asks. The correct answer is no, of course, but the right answer is that he’s elated. He looks down to hide the smile he couldn’t make go away. That’s when he sees his brace and remembers his injured leg. The only pain he feels, though, is on his cheek. “I had it handled,” she says and shows him the red rhinestone-encrusted mace attached to her keychain, which her thumb sits on top of. He grins, and says, more bravely than he would have had he not been floating on Cloud 9, “Or you could just slap me again.” Her red lips slowly curve into a cat-like smile. She folds her arms and coolly leans against the wall. Her eyes glitter with mischief, and she purrs, “Well, now you’ve got my attention.”

I wrote this for Smut Week, but it's so much bigger than that. It was a monumental task writing about Kristoff, a war-injured vet, and Anna, the woman that uses pain to take away his pain, but so rewarding as their relationship turned into something so much bigger than h/c for them. It's two people bringing out the absolute best in each other, Kristoff healing in a way he never thought he could, and discovering that he was worthy of giving and accepting love. It's one of the most meaningful things I've written.

Rain Check (Kristanna, E)

Newly divorced Anna goes for a walk to work off some pent-up energy, but gets derailed by rain, a good Samaritan’s garage, and some really great D.

Another Smut Week fic, a follow-up to a cute little one-shot I wrote for myself last year (Future's So Bright, T) and wanted more of. I really love the way Anna and KB love each other. And Anna really goes for what she wants, but ultimately chooses herself and what she needs. I like this AU so much that I did a follow-up fic (Here Comes the Sun, E) and I'm also planning a 30+ multi-chap fic tentatively titled "And If I Change My Mind" to be published hopefully in the next few months.

Valentine Bear (Rydoff, T)

Kristoff gets some unexpected help setting up the Peeps Valentine's Day display at Weselton's Grocery Store when Anna, the assistant manager--and Kristoff's best friend--assigns Ryder to assist. Will Anna's Cupid's arrow strike Kristoff's heart? Or will it knock him down, along with his display?

I had this idea of Kristoff playing with Peeps and using his fake voice to talk for them. Who else talks for Peeps? Ryder of course! It's such a fun concept and I loved writing for them so much that I wrote a short multi-chap sequel (Mint Jelly and Onion Jam). Oh, and I got to explore Anna & Kristoff as adorable best friends and Anna/Hans (Alive and Burning Brighter), also a first!

Behind Adjoined Doors (Kristanna, E)

After seeing her recently engaged ex at her cousin's wedding, Anna sneaks through the adjoining door of her hotel room to have meaningless sex with Kristoff - because it’s not possible to fall for someone you can’t stand, right?

I wrote this one for Smut Week and it still tickles me. Cocky Kristoff is just so... he's a bro. Sort of. At least it seems like he is. And Anna has to open her eyes (and her legs) to see the diamond in the rough hiding right next door.

What's up for 2023? I'm working on a Kristanna Valentine's Day fic (short multi-chap), finishing up All Tied Up and Head Over Feet. Chugging along with The Refugees, and my new upcoming long fic "And If I Change My Mind," set in the Bandana AU.

[aquadestinyswriting]

When Forever Comes Songfic

Summary:  You know what? Since I've been giving some thought to the way the early parts of the Selene/Edwin relationship is going to unfold, I might as well post the songfic I did for this song on my playlist for The Wizard's Tale. I haven't written a songfic for nearly 14 years, so this doesn't live up to my usual standards. However, I am way past caring now. Green text is for the parts Edwin is "singing", purple is Selene. I've also modified the lyrics a little to make the song for this fic make sense.

Words: 1,189

Warnings: some spoilers for To Heal a Broken Soul and Confessions of a Troubled Heart. There's nothing graphic in here, just fluff and a little angst.

tags: @druidx, @sparrow-orion-writes, @warriorbookworm, @mariahwritesstuff, @writeblrsupport, @ashirisu, @thesorcerersapprentice, @blind-the-winds, @philosophika, @the-down-upside-finch

The flowers gold Will softly sway To reunite the lost And lead us on our way

Edwin frowned as he tried to figure out what on Titan Selene meant by Daffodil Field, at least until Chrackle started squawking ‘Yastie’ at him over and over. Thanking the bird, the cleric cast his Scry and waited for his old friend to pick up on the other end.

The glow of soul Will light my face The river's current Flows inside each act of grace

The light of the Cure spell lit up the cleric’s face as he cast. He smiled as the gash on the little boy’s leg healed over. Selene waited in the doorway until he was done, the young boy hugging the new Abouna gratefully before dashing off with a happy wave.

Walk the garden breathe the scent of life Take this moment just to feel Comfort in my tiny paradise A place for lonely hearts to heal

Edwin had just finished tending to the back half of the Garden of Galana and was walking around to the front to work on the rosebushes by the front doors, when he noticed a shock of auburn hair out of the corner of his eye. Startled, the cleric looked over to the oak tree in the corner only to find the Grand Magus sat underneath it, her nose stuck in a book of some kind and totally oblivious to the world around her.

And when forever comes to be Will you remain inside? A little light of empathy To keep us unified Let me inside

“I know you’ve never been one to talk about personal matters with other people, Sel.” he said, “But this is getting completely out of hand.” The wizard shook her head,

“I can’t… not right now anyway.” she replied, her voice tight, “Look, just drop it. Please.” Edwin noticed the tension in his old friend and relented. Heaving a sigh he rubbed at his forehead,

“Alright, fine.” he agreed with a grumble, “But you need to talk to me sooner rather than later. You can’t keep carrying the weight of… whatever this is by yourself.”

The warmest smile A waiting hand A friend to free my heart And help me understand

Selene glared up at the laughing man above her. Edwin shook his head, a warm smile on his face as he extended his hand and helped the wizard up,

“Sorry, but...your face.” he giggled. Selene’s glare lifted as she too started laughing as she stood,

“Yeah, well don’t expect me to save your sorry behind if you end up in the same situation, mister cleric.” she retorted.

Through life and loss Through thick and thin You help all others Face the pain they hold within

“How do you even do it?” Edwin looked up, a confused frown on his face as he looked up at Selene,

“Do what?” he asked. Selene gestured to the door where the grieving family had left a little earlier. Edwin shrugged,

“To be honest, I never really thought about it.” he admitted, “It’s just something I’ve always done.”

Eyes of greed are ever watching me Lonely rooms and broken time Plots and plans to pluck the petals free To drain them of their golden shine

~I can’t get him involved in this Chrackle. It’s bad enough Schreiber has it in for me, I don’t want him getting rid of the only other one of us left!~

~You honestly think Schreiber doesn’t know he was with you guys? His statue is in the plaza outside along with yours.~

~That’s not the point. Edwin isn’t on the Council so Reginald has no real reason to feel threatened by him.~

~You really think that once he gets word that the new Abouna is another Hero of Toreguard that he’s really just going to leave the man alone just because he’s not on the Council? Schreiber wants you all gone, or did you forget that little detail?~

And when forever comes to be I will remain inside A little light of empathy To keep us unified I’ll Keep you outside

“What happened?” he asked, keeping his voice low and body language as relaxed as he could manage. For several long moments there was no reply, or even any indication that the woman had heard him. Eventually, however, the wizard shifted a little, and buried her head in the crook of her arms,

“I don’t want to talk about it.” she muttered, her voice muffled.

When I learn of the loss that defines me Can I hold to the promise that binds me And carry on into tomorrow's sorrow

“No, damn you! You can’t do this to me, not now!” he cried, falling to his knees and burying his face into the bedding as Selene’s body finally relaxed, rattled out a sigh and stilled. Edwin squeezed the rapidly cooling hand he still held tightly, ignoring the sharp pain in his palms, “I love you.”

When I'm facing the ghosts of my destiny Will I turn or remain in the memory And choose to stray or choose to follow

“Alright then, let me rephrase.” she said, “You said that I was still needed but that heading back or not was my choice. What then, is the point if either one of us ends up dead for good shortly after?” she asked. Greg looked up at her through his highlighted fringe with a soft smile,

“Then you make the most of the time you have.” he replied easily.

And when forever comes to be Will you remain inside A little light of empathy To keep us unified

Edwin frowned, worried, as the pink tinge in Selene’s face darkened somewhat and spread to her ears,

“Selene are you..?” he was quickly cut off by Selene waving her free hand,

“Nono, I’m fine.” she assured him, “It’s just… she trailed off, flailing a little as she tried to find the right words, “Cur ita velim Durus.” she hissed in Draconic. Edwin’s frown deepened, having no clue what it was the Wizard in front of him had just said. He took both of Selene’s hands in his own,

“Ok, breathe. What’s the matter?”

I’ll let you inside

“I heard you, you know.” she said quietly. Edwin’s head snapped back round, his heart skipping wildly in disbelief.

“You… wha..?” he stammered. Selene squeezed his shoulder to stop him from babbling, took a shaky breath and continued, “That’s why I came back. I didn’t want to leave this world before I got a chance to tell you that… I love you too.” she finally admitted…

[ineffable-snowman]

Fic Tag Game

Thanks for tagging me @gingiekittycat 💜

I already did this a few months ago (and somehow managed to find it on my blog, wow!), so I've copy pasted most of the answers and updated some of them.

How many works do you have on ao3?

fifteen

2. What's your Ao3 word count?

403,077

3. What fandoms do you write for?

right now I'm not writing much, just occasionally trying to work on my Good Omens wip.

4. What are your top five fics by kudos?

Maybe Someday - 1,114 kudos

Trouble Man - 853 kudos

Pet Psychopath - 738 kudos

Match Made on Earth - 616 kudos

Partners, Accidentally - 571 kudos

5. Do you respond to comments?

I try, because I think interaction is important to keep a fandom "alive" (even if often I don't know what to say apart from "thanks for reading and commenting"). That reminds me that you, @gingiekittycat, sent me the nicest comment and I still haven't responded yet, will do now right away!

6. What's the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

I don't write angsty endings. But some readers didn't agree with me that Match Made on Earth had a happy ending, so I will pick that one here.

7. What's the fic your write with the happiest ending?

They all have happy endings, but the ending of Four Chord Songs and Sentimental Lyrics is particularly sappy. I was wondering if that love song in the last chapter was *too much*, but then I thought: nope, it's Anakin, *too much* is his personality trait.

8. Do you get hate on fics?

Some months ago I got two very rude anon comments on one of my Obikin fics accusing me of horrible things. The accusations felt pretty generic and did not fit that particular story at all, so probably from someone who had not even read the summary, but they still left me a little shaken. Fortunately, the people in the Obikin discord were really kind about it and helped to cheer me up.

Back on FFNET I received the occasional "ew, they're not gay, why would you write that?" Also there were some people who were angry at the way I wrote Obi-Wan, saying things like "how can you say he's your favourite character and then characterise him as weak/flawed/incompetent... and make so many bad things happen to him?"

BUT, all in all, fandom has been a positive experience and the many good interactions far outweigh the odd rude comment.

9. Do you write smut? What kind?

Does one awkward sex scene per multi chapter fic count? (No.)

10. Do you write cross-overs?

No.

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

I don't think so, not that I know of.

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

Yes, a long time ago on FFNET when I still wrote Harry Potter fic.

13. Have you ever cowritten a fic before?

Yes. Would love to do it again but I'm a very slow writer and would hate to leave someone waiting for too long.

14. What's your all time favourite ship?

I feel like Obikin is the "correct" answer because I always come back to them.

15. What's your WIP you like to finish, but doubt you ever will?

Step into Christmas with me. So far, I've managed to add two chapters every season. If I continue at that pace, I might finish it in two more years...

16. What are your writing strength?

Beginnings and endings.

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

The long middle parts that always become too long and repetitive.

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language for a fic?

I don't really like it because it takes me out of a story. I don't want to check footnotes or use google translate in the middle of reading. I prefer if it's done with descriptions or dialogue tags matching the perception of the pov character, for example, if the character doesn't understand Spanish but I do, it's better if it's written like "...she said something in Spanish that sounded like a question to him" instead of writing down the actual question in Spanish.

19. First fandom you wrote for?

Just for myself: Harry Potter. Posting online: Star Wars.

20. Favourite fic you've ever written?

Servants of the Force is definitely not my best writing but it's still my favourite fic anyway because I've never put so much effort into a fic before and I'm proud that I finished it.

tagging @chanihobbit, @saddybildaddy, @sky-kenobye, @ineffableobikin (no pressure tags!) and everyone who wants to do it (again).

[beautifulpersonpeach]

Are we getting your review on set me free? The real question is and you know it Did he make the bias list?

***

Hi Anon,

I already reviewed Set Me Free Pt 2. I've written more about SMF Pt 2 than I have about any other song actually. But I'll provide a summary here for you:

My expectations before listening to it - here and here.

My initial reaction immediately after listening to it - here.

My review and Jimin's interview - here and here.

Initial response to panicky asks in my inbox + fan art - here.

Yet another word on the subject of autotune - here.

Alternate perspective on 'opps' - here.

And on the question of if Jimin is now my bias... well, the answer is,

Yes, I think he is.

I mean, I've been in a daze since Friday. It's been more than 24 hours and my body still feels as though it's on fire every time I listen to it. This man dropped the best song of the year, in March. Like Jimin doesn't need to do anything else the rest of 2023, he has already dropped the song of the year.

I haven't mentioned this yet, but one of the most impressive things about SMF Pt 2 is the backup dancers. It is very difficult to perform high-intensity moves for longer than a minute (according to a friend who dances professionally), but in SMF Pt 2 the dancers start doing HIIT push-up moves 2:30 minutes into the song. They'd been dancing for over two minutes and ratcheted up the intensity later on in the song. It's crazy difficult. And yet that's the minimum of what is required to keep up with Jimin. Because he executes every single move perfectly.

And then there's the lyrical content of the song that just sealed the deal for me. I'll explain: the rapline are my loves for life because the way they speak reminds me of myself, sometimes. It's one reason. They have an acute awareness of who they are, and they've explicitly communicated it to everyone through their art. To do that well requires a peculiar kind of energy. That's an energy I relate to on a fundamental level, and I usually feel it only from the rapline. No other member. Until Jimin in Set Me Free Pt 2.

*

I say "I think" he is my bias because there's still a chance he's not. I mean, I'm still able to write about him. My brain isn't misfiring at the thought. Etc. So maybe I'm just in shock, but Jimin in this song is all I've been able to think about for hours now. I've listened to his song on three different earphones, one headphone, and three speakers. In the car too. He sounds only more incredible every time. His pronunciation of the lyrics tells me he fully believes every word coming out of his mouth. The song is a masterpiece. An auditory delight.

He's such a beautiful genius.

Nasty too.

But that's what I like.

So here we are.