#(and only like $10 more so i was already spending a fuckton on a gaming pc so i said fuck it and then got it home and was like WOAHG)

[bosspigeon]

something i think is very funny about veilguard is the black sclera FINALLY being an option now

i know i was pretty fuckin loud about qunari/vashoth NEEDING to have black sclera back in the day (it sets them apart a bit more as something more than just "taller humans with horns) , and i still stand by that, tbh, but upon playing da2 (the game with the first Solid Qunari "design"--even if it was like three models reused ad infinitum) for the first time in several years on a bigger screen and higher definition, i've come to a realization

i don't think the qunari actually ever had black sclera, i think their eyes were just so deep-set and shadowed by their brow (because THE HORNS FOLLOW THE BROWBONE, VEILGUARD!!!!) that it just looked like the da2 qunari's sclera were black!

so, we were wrong the entire time

but i WILL keep doing it regardless😤

[bigskydreaming]

Height discourse confuses me so much, because I, a 4'9 21-year-old Asian perceives anyone taller as tall. But reading international posts saying 5'6 is small makes me double-take, like, "Wut?"

LOL, ahh yes, the infamous “How Tall IS Dick Grayson Actually” discourse. I feel you. And I can definitely see how it would be bemusing as hell given your perspective, lmao.

And I mean, its definitely up there on the list of “Things I Can’t Believe There’s Actually Discourse About” buuuuuut I’m not really judging because I know damn well there’s a fuckton of shit I’ve Discoursed about on pretty much everyone else’s “Things I Can’t Believe There’s Actually Discourse About” list. 

*Shrugs* But I also do get why it exists, if you scratch beneath the surface - as is often true of a lot of seemingly inane discourses. Its not really about height so much as it is about the why’s of writers specifying certain heights for him, and stereotypes associated with height.

On the one hand, you’ve got the fans who look at writers who make a point of writing Dick as particularly short, or the shortest of the Batfam once all of them are adults, and think: this is because of fandom’s fixation with writing Dick as effeminate or the least ‘manly’ of the Batfam, and thus I dislike it and do not trust this writer’s take on him.

Then on the other hand, you have the fans who look at objections like this and think: this is because of bullshit fostered by the toxic masculinity and sexism that’s so present in society, even women can be guilty of perpetuating the idea that there’s anything TO object about there, that a man being effeminate or less ‘manly’ than his brothers is some kind of insult or slight against him in the first place.

But then go back to the first hand.....

And on the one hand, of those fans, you’ve got the fans that don’t actually think there’s anything insulting about a man being effeminate or less manly themselves, but given that the bullshit fostered by the toxic masculinity and sexism in society is so everpresent, even women can be guilty of perpetuating the idea that ‘shorter = weaker’ etc, etc.......its not him being written as short that’s objectionable to them, its what they believe the writer is implying by making that distinction that they’re objecting to, like that it reads to them as though its being used as a smokescreen to create associations in readers’ minds, with the idea of him being weaker or softer or whatever the fuck compared to his brothers, without those writers actually having to SAY what they’re getting at there and spell it out. Plausible deniability kinda thing.

And then on the other hand, you have those fans who object to writing Dick as short because they actually DO buy into that bullshit and they ARE simply objecting to the idea itself because of toxic masculinity and sexism and etc etc.

But then go back to the original second hand.....

And on the one hand THERE, you have the fans whose responses to people objecting about writing Dick as short are based on exactly what they say they are......pointing out that its only objectionable if its viewed as insulting and the only reasons its viewed as insulting are toxic masculinity and sexism which they’re calling out as being perpetuated here.

And on the other hand there, you have those fans who DO buy into the associations between ‘shorter = weaker’ and actually ARE writing things that way with the intent of hoping to form that association in the minds of any readers who similarly buy into those lines of thought or are susceptible to it......and are simply using ‘arent you the REAL misogynist here for thinking shorter equals more feminine which equals weaker or frail or whatever’ arguments that are simply typical flipping the script tactics and hiding behind buzzwords they don’t actually believe in themselves but know are effective in getting people to back down, etc, etc. The plausible deniability thing.

And I’ve been out of hands here for awhile now, obviously, but you get what I mean. Round and round and round it goes, with the true point always hidden juuuuuuust beneath the surface, and more than a little tedious to have all unpacked and catalogued like here, which is a major factor in why so many people rarely dig beneath the surface of a seemingly inane discourse to get at what people are REALLY arguing about but nobody wants to ‘lose ground on’ by being the first to admit to.

As for me, again, this really isn’t a dicourse that I spend much time on because I’d rather cut straight to the point of an argument in general, and this isn’t an discourse that’s particularly amenable to people doing that, obviously. 

And also, I honestly just don’t care that much. LOL. Yeah, I often read works where Dick is singled out as being distinctively shorter and feel an author is trying to ‘imply’ something and its the implications of that which are the source of any ‘Not Good, Scoob’ feelings rather than because I agree with what’s trying to be implied. But y’know......when an author IS playing that game and they actually do buy into toxic and sexist stereotypes.....I mean, there’s literally always other indications of this in their work, giving them away all over the place. So there’s honestly never really a time when his height itself is actually what that hinges upon, y’know?

So my big takeaway from all of this is: headcanon and write Dick as whatever damn height you feel like and if you want to imply something about him just fucking say it directly and if you want to accuse someone of something just fucking call it out directly.

*points to the above unpacking of this particular discourse and how fucking tedious and unnecessary so much of it is and all just because people won’t just say what they actually came to say or lay claim to what they actually said*

ANYWAY.

Personally, regardless of how Dick is written in a fic, I will always headcanon him as somewhere between 5′10″ and 6′1″ for reasons that are entirely irrelevant and meaningless to anyone but me, pretty much. LOL.

In my head, Dick obviously has to be that height because he’s walked a runway as a model before. That’s it. That’s the whole reason my mind automatically goes to that span when picturing him or reading something about him.

(As most people who have followed me for a bit know, I spent a number of years working in the TV industry. There were a couple years there where I did a little bit of print modeling too, nothing major at all, but enough to know that the fashion industry has a Very Definitive Thing about male runway models and height: If you are a male runway model, you are between 5′10″ and 6′1″. If you are not between 5′10″ and 6′1″, you are not a male runway model and you never will be. Its a Thing. And not one the industry is shy about. 

Because of the fact that the fashion industry is mostly centered around women models with name recognition, and very few men who model have star power specifically in terms of modeling, rather than because of crossover/overlap with acting, there’s a major difference in how designers tend to approach designing for models. Most designers designing runway looks for women do so with specific models already in mind. Most designers designing runway looks for men do so without specific models in mind because there simply aren’t enough male models with the kind of branding/name recognition that does a designer any good. 

So designers literally JUST design runway looks for men in that height range, and anyone outside that range would require tailoring that could feasibly throw off an entire runway look. So they just don’t do it, to the point that an agent or manager sending them someone outside that height range to consider for a job means that agent’s not getting called back, because they just gave themselves away as a clear amateur by not knowing better.

Of course, keep in mind that my experiences with modeling are based on the industry re: ten years ago, so it could be that things have changed in this regard since. But that was the status quo then.)

So yeah. Dick Grayson walked a runway for Cheyenne Freemont, thus in my mind he’s obviously between 5′10″ and 6′1″ lolol, because any up and coming designer trying to make a name for herself would absolutely know better than to send out someone shorter than that and still think anyone in the industry would take her seriously.

LOL. I told you it was inane. But in my defense, plenty of people headcanon that Dick HAS to be small because he’s a gymnast, and uh.....that is not how that works. Anyone can be an amazing gymnast, its just that smaller body types lend themselves to gymnastics better than bigger, bulkier bodies. And thus the competition oriented gymnastics SPORT heavily favors cultivating and training gymnasts on the smaller side, because coaches and endorsers are looking for literally any advantage possible.

(Being shorter means you have a lower center of gravity which is a help when balancing, or stabilizing yourself. Its easier for a shorter gymnast to keep their balance or to stick a landing. But it doesn’t become impossible just because someone’s hit six feet tall. It HELPS to be shorter. It doesn’t determine whether or not you can do a trick at all, much like being short and having a lower center of gravity by no means GUARANTEES you have good balance.)

And of course, though Dick excels at a ton of gymnastics, he is not and never has been a gymnast per se....he’s an acrobat. From a family of acrobats. Who have been doing this as a family business generationally, thus.....why would they have future height requirements when training their son in the family business? And being from a family of acrobats doesn’t ensure you’re going to be short, if your family members are not already short to begin with. Evolution does not give a fuck about future employment opportunities when selecting which gene sequences to flip on while in utero.

The correlation is ‘most gymnasts who excel at gymnastics feats are small,’ not ‘to excel at gymastic feats, you must be small.’

I am absolutely and completely just rambling now and have been for awhile so I’m gonna go beat up my insomnia until it caves and lets me go the fuck to sleep.

[sally-mun]

I had a fun day at the arcade today~

So I went with my friend Ivan to this amazing arcade today, and in addition to all the games the place also has a FUCKTON of claw machines, with all sorts of prizes inside. After walking past an enormous machine that had some 3ft Yoshis inside, I made some off-handed comment about how “it’s always Mario dolls that get licensed out. Why are there never any Sonic dolls?” A bit later after playing some games we check out the claw machines, and LO AND BEHOLD there’s actually a machine full of Sonic dolls!!

I really, REALLY wanted the Knuckles doll. I mean look at it, look how cute he is! So I spent like half my game credits just on the claw machine trying to get him, but I just couldn’t seem to get a hold of one. I eventually gave up and tried for Shadow instead since there was one in a reasonable position, and I managed to nab one! In the midst of all this Ivan had apparently disappeared for only like a minute and reappeared with a Boris plushie; I was so engrossed with the Sonic crane that I completely missed the fact that there was a Bendy crane just two machines down. (Ivan is kind of a wiz at claw machines, what can I say.)

So we go off to play some more games, and eventually we use up almost all of our game credits. It’s not until THIS point that Ivan and I suddenly remember there was another claw machine we’d meant to go back to: Another big one that had anime figurines in it, and he was going to try for one! Since we just got paid the other day, Ivan puts more money on his card and we head back to the machine to try for his prize. It’s definitely not a standard claw machine; it’s like a flattened oval and it has one claw, and you can only move it left once, and then back once. After you move it, the claw extends upward (so you have to account for the changed shape in advance while you move it) and THEN it moves down and will sweep the claw forward to the right. The prize (the anime figure) is balanced on two bars all the way to the left, and you have to manipulate it to the right until it’ll fall. It takes some trial and error, but between the two of us nudge it enough that it finally falls off the bars and he gets his figure!

However, now he’s got like $10 left over on his card, so we decide to go back to the Sonic machine and try again for Knuckles. Since we’ve been making a good team so far anyway, we work together and take turns flipping that same Knux around, and eventually we actually get him! I was so excited I jumped up and down! All of a sudden we realize there’s a girl next to us, and she congratulates us, then asks if we can help her. She said she really wants either a Sonic or a Shadow plushie, but she’s bad at claw machines and wanted to know if we’d try to get her one. So we’re like, of course we will! She’d swipe her card and then we went back to the same back-and-forth pattern we had before, but after a while Ivan stopped her and started swiping his card instead, because he wanted to burn up the leftover credits anyway. After only a few tries, we managed to get her a Sonic plushie! It was a really great moment and she gave us each a piece of her candy as a thank you for helping. It was extra satisfying for because I had decided that, if we couldn’t win her one, I would just give her my Shadow plushie (I mean I’d gotten the doll I originally wanted anyway), but winning the Sonic was even better because then -she- got that moment of “WE WON WE WON!!” and that’s just really special.

So we head into the prize area (despite our arms already being full of prizes) to spend the “tickets” we won (it’s still just data on the card you swipe). Earlier Ivan had been playing this Kung-Fu Panda game that he was REALLY good at, and he’d won over 1,000 tickets just on two plays of that game. While we’re looking at the prizes, most of which require waaaaay too many tickets for anything good, I got taken in by this little Kiki’s Delivery Service box, which it turns out has a pair of hand towels. It was like 940 tickets or so, and Ivan offered to get it for me with his winnings, since he’d easily made that many tickets at Kung-Fu Panda. I had started to tell him that he should spend the tickets on a prize for HIM, and he just hugged me and said “You’re my prize~”

So yeah, incredibly fun time. We also played some rhythm games, and this AMAZINGLY immersive Luigi’s Mansion arcade game. I’ll have to take pics of that one next time, it’s really incredible. All in all, very good day~

[thortunes]

Don’t mind me, I’m self-soothing

WHAT WE DON’T ACTUALLY 100% KNOW YET

why Loki took the Tesseract at the end of Ragnarok

why (or even if) Loki is handing it over to someone, let alone whether or not that someone is Thanos

whether or not the shot of (presumably) Ebony Maw walking among the dead (Asgardian/Sakaarian?) bodies will turn out to have any connection to the very next shot of Loki

the events that transpired immediately before the two seconds we see of Loki in the trailer

where in the movie those two seconds take place

whether or not Thanos considers Loki to be in his debt after the events of the Avengers

how much Loki does or does not know about Thanos, the Infinity Stones, and/or Thanos’ plan to collect them

WHAT WE KIND OF MAYBE KNOW THAT ONLY COMPLICATES WHAT WE DON’T ACTUALLY 100% KNOW

Tom didn’t seem to spend much time filming IW and/or A4, but both films are still filming (IW is doing reshoots, A4 just extended principal photography into January).

In this interview, Tom was asked about Loki failing Thanos, to which he replied: “I don’t think he would see it that way.”

In his response to the above question, Tom also said he doesn’t think Loki “was ever in on [Thanos’] plan.”

Tom could be bluffing

Marvel likes to fuck with fans and their trailers are very carefully crafted with deliberate misdirects

WHAT I DON’T WANT

for Loki to die, period. I’m selfish and I won’t apologize. Leave me with the impression that he lives out the rest of his post-MCU life writing plays and causing non-murderous mischief and occasionally being a somewhat decent advisor to Thor (who is also not allowed to die).

for Loki to die, ESPECIALLY not at the hands of Thanos, ESPECIALLY not within the first 10 minutes of this movie, and ESPECIALLY not as a way to show off Thanos’ ruthlessness. That would be a repeat of what Hela did to the Warriors Three at the beginning of Ragnarok. If it felt cheap or overly convenient to waste three relatively minor characters to prove a tonal point, imagine how much cheaper (not to mention repetitive/unimaginative) it will feel to see it play out yet again with a character like Loki. He deserves better, Tom deserves better, and I think it’s fair to say that fans do too.

for Loki to die a sacrificial death to save Thor or the surviving Asgardians, but if this happens it’s the option that’s the least difficult to swallow. It’s hard to imagine how going out in this manner wouldn’t feel cliche or redundant (to audiences AND to Thor, tbh--I’m burnt out on this from The Dark World), but at the same time I was really skeptical about how Marvel would find a place for Loki in Ragnarok that felt satisfying, so I’ll try to entertain the possibility of him sacrificing himself (for real this time) with a little more faith.

for Loki to be an outright evil villain. I’ll be so pissed if the character development we (finally) got in Ragnarok is entirely disregarded.

for Loki to be an outright hero. That’s just not who he is. Sometimes he does the right things, sometimes for the right reasons, and as fun as it is to imagine him fighting alongside The Avengers and GotG, that’s not his crew.

for Thor to be orphaned AND brotherless. It’s too much. Life is already enough of a hellscape, please allow me this one bit of escapism by letting them both live in relative peace.

WHAT I WOULD PERSONALLY FIND RAD

for Loki to use his manipulative prowess to throw a wrench or two in Thanos’ plan and not die in the process

for Loki and Thor to come up with a scheme to play the long game--they LOVE coming up with schemes, let them fucking do what they love--against Thanos and not die in the process

for Loki, who 1) loves Thor and 2) is his own worst enemy and 3) has attempted to reconcile 1 and 2 across four films, to achieve some kind of resolution within himself, especially if he exits this mortal coil

to see the full extent of Loki’s powers, even if he’s dying in the process

to know that whatever happens and regardless of how I end up feeling, Tom Hiddleston is happy/satisfied with how things wrap up for Loki. He put in the work. He created an iconic character. I hope there has been and continues to be some reciprocity somewhere in there for him.

Do I feel any better? I don’t know, and I’m sorry if I dragged any of you down here with me. I think we just want to see all of these characters treated with respect and thoughtfulnes. Loki is a wildcard who can’t stay in one box for very long. That’s what makes him so engaging, but I imagine it’s also a big part of the reason why there’s a lot of anxiety surrounding his fate. It seems like a fuckton of people expect Loki to die. I don’t think I expect it as much as I’m just nervous about the possibility. Maybe that’s exactly what Marvel wants, so maybe we’re in for something totally unexpected. Or maybe they’re just giving us fair warning so we can emotionally prepare ourselves.

It’s going to be a very long five months. I wish you all luck.

[racke7]

Me vs Bloodborne 2

On behalf of not feeding the ridiculously long post any further. I will give an update on my second character here instead.

Basically though, I only have the Research Hall and onwards left, and I’m pretty sure I’m overleveled for it. Like, potentially massively so (which has been an actual problems through this entire playthrough).

See, I wanted to grab the Beast Claw. Which means getting to the second layer of the Chalice Dungeon you get from Amygdala (and I stand by my earlier comment that she’s a really stupid boss). However, since I was aiming very much straight towards that as a goal? I ended up earning a fuckton of blood echoes whilst grinding for “Ritual Blood (3)”, and kind of ended up really high-level all of a sudden. (Shadows of Yharnam went down on my first go at them, oops)

Turns out I’m not very fond of the Beast Claw in use though, and by then I’d already managed to find the Whirlygig Saw (2nd character is strength-based) and well... I fell in love. Nevertheless, I decided to kill Laurence properly for his Rune-drop, and... uhh... I kind of hate Laurance more than I hate Logarius. By like, a LOT. So instead of charging into him and dying endlessly and yelling myself hoarse in impotent fury, I leveled.

He still kicked my ass enough times that I was kind of hoarse when I finally crowed my victory cry of “fuck you Laurence“, but... as a result of all of this I was suddenly kind of ridiculously overleveled for the rest of the game.

Like, today I walked through Micolash on my first go (not very hard, I know), continued onwards and killed my way to Mergo’s Wetnurse (didn’t trigger her), killed my way through the Upper Cathedral Ward on my first go, killed the Celestial Emissary (he actually managed to hurt me a bit, which surprised me), and then went off to pick a fight with Ebrietas whom I also killed on my first go (went in with 15 blood vials, came out with 10).

And it’s just... I’m not sure if this is because the Whirlygig Saw is VERY different to fight with in comparison to the Blade of Mercy (which it is, because BoM has 0-stagger so you have to judge your opponents attack super-well, whereas WS just causes everything to stagger almost all the time), or if it’s because of the skill of experience, or if it’s because I keep managing to get ridiculously overleveled all the time, but I just keep getting this feeling that this game is a lot easier than I originally thought it’d be when I bought it.

Like I remember watching let’s plays where they carefully aggro’d an enemy out of a group, one at a time. And I’m just gleefully leaping into the fray, swinging my weapon wildly and not dying horribly (most of the time). But then I’m guessing most let’s players came into Bloodborne from the Souls games, and their mechanics are supposed to be quite different.

Also, my first playing through the game, I was using BoM, so quickstep was EVERYTHING. And now I’m so used to quickstepping into attacks that I can’t really help myself. Not to mention that I actually have AoE-attacks now so I don’t have to spend the entire time jumping around like a crazy person.

It’ll be interesting to go up against Lady Maria soon though. Hunters generally get partially-hit when they do their quickstep dodges, so maybe she’ll be even lovelier this time around (since I won’t be able to visceral attack her).

(And no, I totally don’t at all perfectly understand Sophia’s reaction. Not at all. *tsun-tsun*)

[binsofchaos]

The Tail End

e made a fancy PDF of this post for printing and offline viewing.

Buy it here.

In a post last year, we laid out the human lifespan visually. By years:

By months:

And by weeks:

While working on that post, I also made a days chart, but it seemed a bit much, so I left it out. But fuck it.

The days chart blows my mind as much as the weeks chart. Each of those dots is only a single Tuesday or Friday or Sunday, but even a lucky person who lives to 90 will have no problem fitting every day in their life on one sheet of paper.

But since doing the Life in Weeks post, I’ve been thinking about something else.

Instead of measuring your life in units of time, you can measure it in activities or events. To use myself as an example:

I’m 34, so let’s be super optimistic and say I’ll be hanging around drawing stick figures till I’m 90.1 If so, I have a little under 60 winters left:

And maybe around 60 Superbowls left:

The ocean is freezing and putting my body into it is a bad life experience, so I tend to limit myself to around one ocean swim a year. So as weird as it seems, I might only go in the ocean 60 more times:

Not counting Wait But Why research, I read about five books a year, so even though it feels like I’ll read an endless number of books in the future, I actually have to choose only 300 of all the books out there to read and accept that I’ll sign off for eternity without knowing what goes on in all the rest.

Growing up in Boston, I went to Red Sox games all the time, but if I never move back there, I’ll probably continue at my current rate of going to a Sox game about once every three years—meaning this little row of 20 represents my remaining Fenway visits:

There have been eight US presidential elections during my lifetime and about 15 to go. I’ve seen five presidents in office and if that rate continues, I’ll see about nine more.

I probably eat pizza about once a month, so I’ve got about 700 more chances to eat pizza. I have an even brighter future with dumplings. I have Chinese food about twice a month and I tend to make sure six dumplings occurs each time, so I have a fuckton of dumplings to look forward to:

But these things aren’t what I’ve been thinking about. Most of the things I just mentioned happen with a similar frequency during each year of my life, which spreads them out somewhat evenly through time. If I’m around a third of my way through life, I’m also about a third of my way through experiencing the activity or event.

What I’ve been thinking about is a really important part of life that, unlike all of these examples, isn’t spread out evenly through time—something whose [already done / still to come] ratio doesn’t at all align with how far I am through life:

Relationships.

I’ve been thinking about my parents, who are in their mid-60s. During my first 18 years, I spent some time with my parents during at least 90% of my days. But since heading off to college and then later moving out of Boston, I’ve probably seen them an average of only five times a year each, for an average of maybe two days each time. 10 days a year. About 3% of the days I spent with them each year of my childhood.

Being in their mid-60s, let’s continue to be super optimistic and say I’m one of the incredibly lucky people to have both parents alive into my 60s. That would give us about 30 more years of coexistence. If the ten days a year thing holds, that’s 300 days left to hang with mom and dad. Less time than I spent with them in any one of my 18 childhood years.

When you look at that reality, you realize that despite not being at the end of your life, you may very well be nearing the end of your time with some of the most important people in your life. If I lay out the total days I’ll ever spend with each of my parents—assuming I’m as lucky as can be—this becomes starkly clear:

It turns out that when I graduated from high school, I had already used up 93% of my in-person parent time. I’m now enjoying the last 5% of that time. We’re in the tail end.

It’s a similar story with my two sisters. After living in a house with them for 10 and 13 years respectively, I now live across the country from both of them and spend maybe 15 days with each of them a year. Hopefully, that leaves us with about 15% of our total hangout time left.

The same often goes for old friends. In high school, I sat around playing hearts with the same four guys about five days a week. In four years, we probably racked up 700 group hangouts. Now, scattered around the country with totally different lives and schedules, the five of us are in the same room at the same time probably 10 days each decade. The group is in its final 7%.

So what do we do with this information?

Setting aside my secret hope that technological advances will let me live to 700, I see three takeaways here:

1) Living in the same place as the people you love matters. I probably have 10X the time left with the people who live in my city as I do with the people who live somewhere else.

2) Priorities matter. Your remaining face time with any person depends largely on where that person falls on your list of life priorities. Make sure this list is set by you—not by unconscious inertia.

3) Quality time matters. If you’re in your last 10% of time with someone you love, keep that fact in the front of your mind when you’re with them and treat that time as what it actually is: precious.

[idunlikegirilikebah]

Blez: Zen, but then she falls in love with V and kinda forgets about him a little when the V route is released. She’s kinda lazy when it comes to the four days before each route, missing a bunch of chatrooms. Before she branches the path she usually replays a few to get the person she wants. Her first party she didn’t invite any guests (she was gonna wait until right before the party to answer all the emails but accidentally entered the party anyway). Was PISSED about the secret ends. She fell even more in love with V at that time.

Blee: She gained interest in Mystic Messenger from Tuesday and Cecilia through osmosis. She probably got a lot of bad endings for neglecting the chat rooms. (Stupid Blee, not adjusting her sleeping schedule for the RFA.) But once she started taking the game seriously, she tried to romance 707 even though she was in casual mode. She ended up going on Jaehee’s route instead, and she fell in lurv. Later on, when she FINALLY unlocked deep story mode, she went on 707’s route and fell in lurv with him too. She’s so conflicted about this. Help her.

Tuesday: She was the first among the Gen1 gang to play Mystic Messenger. She literally only downloaded it to romance Jaehee, but she ended up becoming Mystic Messenger trash instead. She sets alarms so she can get all the chat rooms without spending hourglasses. Whenever a chat room is unlocked, she drops EVERYTHING she’s doing to complete it. She cried like a bitch when V’s route was revealed. Also, Jumin is her husbando. (existential crisis intensifies)

Cecilia: Of course, Cecilia was the first to hear about Mystic Messenger from Tuesday. She was constantly bombarded with screenshot and fan art, but mostly, she only pretended to care cause that’s what good girlfriends do? Tuesday finally convinced Celie to download the game. However, the fILE WAS TOO BIG. “Just delete some stuff from your phone,” Tuesday insisted. Once Cecilia finally got it downloaded she skipped through the prologue without much thought, telling Tues it was okay. As she completed more chat rooms, though, she came to realize that it was pretty interesting. She didn’t give much thought to her choices in the game, and ended up getting Yoosung. She considered deleting the game at this point, because Yoosung definitely wasn’t her first choice. Then she got the feelins for him. How could she not? He’s such a sweet little gaming college student. She missed chat rooms sometimes, but never spent her hearts or hourglasses. She’s a HOARDER. As time went on, she began to fall in love with the one character without a route: Unknown.

Clay: “uuuuuuuu mystic messenger is GHEY”

Zenn: It was love at first sight for him. Yoosung was just so precious, he told himself that he would never love any other character more than him. (Especially not Seven. I mean, he’s the most popular character. Seven was too mainstream for him.) However, when he did Seven’s route he was completely and totally in love. He loved how energetic and happy he was, his depth of character later on in the route. Honestly, he found that out of all the characters, Seven was the most relatable. He replays Seven’s Christmas and Valentine’s Day content a lot. When he plays another route, he can’t help but get hearts from Seven. (“ugh i need to play his route again after this”) He spends a fuckton of money on hourglasses because he HAS to be in every single chat room no matter what. Has the after endings, Valentine’s Day content, and all the dlc for every character. Tried doing the bad endings but couldn’t bring himself to go through with them. (except for the bad ending in the christmas dlc)

Jase: Jase don't have a favorite he doesn't like the game. He got like two bad endings before he decided that he didn’t like it. “Why don’t you like the game, jase?” “i keep getting bad endings, therefore it’s trash” “did you play at least half of the chat rooms?” “nah” “did you get a lot of hearts from the character you were trying to get?” “nah, i kept breaking them” “did you get at least 10 people to come to the party?” “nah” “well, maybe if you gave it another chance--” “NAH”

Jess: She enjoys talking to Jumin a lot (are we sure the people in this app are fake? She cries) She wastes no time in finishing Zen’ route (which was who she got first), stashing her hourglasses and buying the deep route stories to see her husband. She finishes Jumin’s and feels empty inside. Literally cries to Sacra about her fake husband. “It’s not fair,” she sniffles, “he just needed someone to be there for him and understand. HE’S NOT A ROBOT HE HAS EMOTIONS TO-” “jess…. I’M TRYING TO SLEEP” She decides to take her mind off of Jumin and plays Seven’s route. She’s not too interested in him, thinks he’s a little annoying. She becomes interested in Vanderwood, however. Even more so during the Secret endings. By the end of it she’s left clutching her phone, emailing cheritz the same sentence over and over. “I NEED A VANDERWOOD ROUTE”

Danny: Danny does not wish to play because “that would make him gaayyy”

Sacra: Started playing way later than everyone else. His goal is to get all the endings. (WOO!) Wonders if he’s technically catfishing the RFA, and is amused by the thought. He didn’t aim for anyone’s route in particular, and ended up getting Zen. Hasn’t even played the other routes yet, but he’s already claimed Zen as his husbando. Gets really invested in the plot line for Zen’s route, literally cries to Jess when Zen gets depressed after Echo Girl’s false accusations. “I’m just so worried about him, you know? HE DOESN’T DESERVE THIS.” And Jess just pats him on the head. Poor Saccles.

Kael: Jumin, because he’s hot and likes cats. What more could he possibly want?

Atlas: (shrug emoji) He don't play the vidya.

Blythe: Yoosung’s her fave, but she wishes he’d stop talking about Rika. Every time Yoosung does that, she’s like “(grumbles) if you miss her so much why don’t you just marry her?? fuckin Yoosung (picks the nice and supportive option)”. Gets extremely upset if she breaks anyone’s heart, even if she doesn’t like the character. “YOOSUNG NO. I DIDN’T MEAN THAT ABOUT RIKA (dies)” Selected the wrong options for most of the emails on her first run and barely got ten before the party.

Sparrow: Sparrow loves Yoosung because she's creepy and she always goes for the young, innocent ones. She completed every route in a week because she bought hourglasses for the 24 hour thing. She obviously completes the emails quickly, but she usually only just barely gets about ten guests.

Jax: Team Honey Buddha and PhD Pepper? *sits in a corner staring into seven's eyes* He loves both Seven and Unknown by the time he finishes the game, however. Frequently checks to see if there's a new chatroom when he's awake, and when one opens, he drops what he's doing to complete it. Sometimes uses hourglasses to unlock them for the next 24 hours. Sleeps with a 707 body pillow.

Kiro: Zen. Hottest Hari plus hottest RFA member equals… happiness? YES. Answers emails immediately after getting them, and never needs to look up walkthroughs to get those guests to come to the party. (Except for monogamy. He didn’t suggest they buy handcuffs for their girlfriend. WHO DOES THAT???) Gets THE FEELS like nobody’s business when he gets that phone call from Zen on day 9, where Zen talks about marriage and how Zen had imagined what their child would look like.

Enzo: fuck I don't want enzo to like any of them. It's like… he contaminates them with his… enzo… ness. I can't see him liking Jaehee, Jumin or seven. *sobs* he's a V man. He also has a thing for Jumin’s father, Chairman Han.

Armelle: She didn't like any of those fucks. She wishes there was a Glam Choi route.

Elodie: She starts the game and thinks Zen is super cute. However, as she’s playing, she feels bad for Jaehee and how hard she works, and ends up getting her route first. Hates Jumin with an undying passion because of it. She also gets more feelings for Zen because of Jaehee’s route, and plays his next. Literally apologizes to Jaehee out loud when she gets close to Zen. She tries really hard to save hourglasses but when she sees she missed a chat that Zen or Jaehee was in, she can’t control herself.

Bodford: His fave does not have a route. It’s the omelette Yoosung made. And omelette Yoosung too. He plays the April Fools dlc over and over so he can see his love and protect him from pigeons. Now, if only there was porridge in the game…

Dex: “ECHO GIRL ROUTE WHEN?” Doesn’t like the game, but he’s petty as fuck. He went on a campaign and sent spoilers to the rest of the cast until he got blocked by everyone. Except Tuesday. “Hey Tuesday, [SPOILER]” “wut. I already know that lolol.” “But what about [SPOILER]” “I completed Seven’s route four months ago” “V gets a route in august” “wtf that’s not a spoiler. That’s official news. You’re annoying, i’m blocking you”

Michael: *cries late at night bc Yoosung and Jumin aren't real* *i mean I lOVE YOU ZENN* Nah but for real if Jumin or Yoosung were real he would leave Zenn. Was one of the first to buy the newly released body pillow covers (Jumin’s of course), and bought Zenn the 707 one as a gift. They share custody of the emoji pillows. Michael keeps up with the chats. He barely ever misses any of them

Ursa: (squees about Yoosung with her girlfriend Blythe)

Johnny: Only downloaded Mystic Messenger because Tuesday kept crying over these fictional Korean men and wanted to see what the deal was. Oh boy. He loves the April Fools dlc okay. Tells everyone Jaehee is his favorite, but it’s really Unknown. He got the prologue bad ending right off the bat, and it was love at first sight. Made a squee of joy when Unknown called him cute. Got Unknown’s phone call in the Christmas dlc, and was like “wow I love Christmas now”. Johnny is a gayboy

[defunctblogtobedeleted]

5/12/17, 11:11pm - gettin cucked up

me and a particular group of my melee friends have been using the word cuck a lot still and I never really thought about where it came from. Like 4chan probably repopularized the use of the word because I saw that cuckold porn became a really big trend on there, but the way we use it isn’t like cuckoldry exactly, it’s more like getting fucked over, or stood up, or most specifically teased with a promise of a good time and then having someone back out at the last minute.

More on that later I guess. This week’s been so hectic. Wtf it’s only been like 5 days it feels like it’s been weeks already. I’ve restrategized my Get Your Shit Together (4.0) list, and the big three things are 1. pass the RPSGT, 2. get moved out of my apartment, 3. get some surgeries. 

Tony actually wrote my letter for real, so I put in my application to take the test this week! My cpr aed certification is outdated so I got an online one and I’m not allowed, so I have to do a course this weekend and fix that, but otherwise I’m all set. Gotta study hard, I’m pretty fucking pumped to get a raise. Glad I’m not dying for the money rn though, the $500 to take the test and get a new cpr cert would have me stresssssed the fuck out, dude.  No progress on getting someone to take my room just yet, my room’s a fucking mess, I need to do laundry, I’m kinda putting all this shit off for now tbh. We’ll wait until I’ve taken the exam I’ve got vacation this week anyway. And I talked to my dad, who gave me his blessing so to speak to get a vasectomy. I fudged a number that I told him, said that it’s 90% reversible (most numbers say 95% or greater w/in 3 years, about 50% at 10), but with the potential for in vitro fertilization even if the reversal fails I’m sure that’s about right. He told me that my mom had told him that she wasn’t trying to get pregnant for a year or so and then ‘was practically pregnant the next day.’ coupled with how mom was talking about being pregnant at their wedding I can see that lol. He basically told me that he loves all of us a lot, but yeah I would’ve definitely done that because it’s worth it to not have that kind of surprise when you can’t make money for a kid. I definitely can’t make money for a kid right now lol that would kill me. So I’ve already called the doc to get a referral and I’m gonna get a vasectomy. Gotta figure out how much my septum surgery will be too, but that’ll be a lot more -_- Me and dad were catching up for a bit and I helped him get in touch with Dr. Bruce to fix a hernia so he’s gonna be giving me some more money so that’ll help with that too though. Plus I’ll FINALLY be making sleep tech money. I’m so fucking pumped.

Plus basically the past 3 days I’ve Actually just been working. 3 patients a night for the first time this week was stressful as fuck. I mean not exactly. Just time consuming and pretty frustrating. As jimmy said “if you were still trying to get through Zelda you probably would be dying right now.” Made it through fine and that should sweeten up my paycheck just a smidgen.

Still haven’t eaten french fries, but definitely gave up on cigs. Practically like two days later. I was out drinking for Josh’s birthday and smoked a bunch. That shit was so fucking cash omg. I got blackout drunk for the first time in forevvver. Was hanging out with Jimmy, Josh, Ian, Jack, ran around with one of josh’s friends trying to pick up chicks at a bar after smashing beers into our head and shotgunning them. I have a video lol I’ll try to upload it once I have internet. Was trying to ‘flirt with all the ASA bitties’ but got too drunk and ended up boxing someone in Josh’s friend’s basement (w/ boxing gloves) lmfao. Reminded me of middle school boxing Cory Winters and having our little fight club ring lol. Drunk snapped a bunch of people, ian drove me home, it was a great fucking night. Oh and at Josh’s friend’s I ran into one of my asian friends who I could not remember for the life of me. I wasn’t sure if he was a league friend or one of brosciouss friends or a smash friend I was just so lost, but played it off really well (as always) and did jager shots with him. Fuck. Ing. Lit. First time I felt so happy and natural to be drinking in forever, too. Even got to see brett3 for a bit. Nice to be back in chapel hill. Especially when they’re good old drinking buddies like Jack. It’s so strange that I don’t really talk to anybody else from chapel hill, but then again it really isn’t. 

The date with Brianna went pretty meh. We met up and joked around a bunch and thrift shopped and I bought a whole fuckton of new pants to ease the process of spring cleaning and two new sweatshirts so I’m not wearing fuzzy shit all the time now that it’s getting warmer. Ate at Ms. Winner’s and it was some delicious ass cheap fried chicken, might be my new go to in gboro now. But she like barely wanted to kiss me at the end of the date idk what’s up with her, I’ve kinda bailed out since she’s all preoccupied with her family anyway.

Instead ive gone back to what I call my “harem strats” You see, by chatting up as many girls as possible (right now juggling 4-5) I divert my attention and stay aloof enough that I don’t seem like a crazy fuck. Instead I’m just an asshole who’s two timing girls, but yknow fuck you stop judging me.  This girl hit me up on snapchat saying I looked cute in my story and that we should smoke sometime. With the snapchat name Smokeahontas I could’ve sworn it was Kat, so I just go along with the convo. But then I see kat has a diff username and I was like wtfff who is this lol. I didn’t ask her though, just played along and eventually remembered when she asked for my insta that it was this girl I matched with on tinder months ago that I never followed up with (like most of them), probably because I got lazy lol.  Had a sort of date with Jamie, we got some food because she was getting off work, we smoked a bit, but she was like texting the whole time and fuckin bailed out after just an episode of south park to ‘go to the beach with her roommate.’ I still have been talking to her a bunch, but Idk what the fuck is up with that, kinda whack. Super cucked by how that went. Especially because when I walked her out to her car I didn’t even get a kiss goodnight it was this weird lasting embrace like she pressed her cheek into mine to make sure I didn’t try to kiss her I guess, but still held me tight for a really long time, I was like rubbing her lower back hoping she’d like loosen up and kiss me but hooooly shit it all felt super fucking awkward. I’m hoping she’s just really conservative about dudes since she’s such a cutie, but idk. it makes me actually not give a fuck about her. I have a date tomorrow night with the other textiles girl idr if I wrote about her, but she’s cute, going to ncsu. “allergic to smoke” lol I told her I quit. (I mean I had that day before but I lied and said I did two weeks ago hahah goddamn I’m kind of a twat maybe.) Also actually got cucked by smokeahontas. It was like a situation that was too good to be true though, to be fair. She didn’t have anything to do yesterday night and wanted to hang out; when I told her I was stuck at work and said she should just smoke with me in the morning she said she actually wanted to and would stay up all night to meet up with me when I got off. Ofc she fell asleep, and when she woke up she said she wanted to go back to bed, so I flippantly said “well you could always sleep over here.” and surprisingly enough she said she was actually game for that, so our smoke and horror movie date turned into a naptime date. But an hour passed while I was eating breakfast and in the shower so I was like ‘wtf is up’ and she said she got sick and threw up. Figured I was super cucked once more by another flaker, kind of a bummed out, but not as bummed as after the dates with Jaime and Bri both went so poorly lol. Just happily told her we can try again another time, and now she’s saying she wants to do the same plan for tomorrow morning. 

So There. Is. The potential for me to get laid twice tomorrow. Pretty exciting. I haven’t told anyone that I remade plans with her though. RIGHT after I told some friends about how the nap date got planned out she said she was sick. I FUCKING swear that every time I brag about one of my dates I have lined up it falls the fuck through the floor. So I’m gonna try to never do it again. 

Then there’s this other theatre major girl I started talking to yesterday. Talked about horoscopes and transitioned from talking feminism to her (woke as fuck teens smh) into asking if she ate ass (jokingly) into asking if she wanted to hang. Turns out she’s actually a really cool super geeky chick and I’m really excited to spend time with her since she wants to show me jurassic park for the first time and learn how to play melee. Kinda weird that she’s only 18 still though O.o oh you, tyler. 

SO yeah. That’s the sitch with that. Went from supppper fucking bummed a couple days ago about my dating situation into thinking that I’m the shit again. I think I want to establish that “i’m the best” mentality once again. Because I really am. I’m fucking amazing lmao. 

Ultimately though, I’m still getting cucked left and right and I have little to no faith that I’ll find anybody I actually care about ever again but we’ll see yknow. I think that’s the strats to how I fell in love last time anyway.

hmmm. what else is there... Work in burlington is still super shitty, my commute went from an hour to like an hour and forty minutes today bc people in NC can’t drive through a little bit of fucking drizzling. 

Idk that’s about all I’ve got. Next week’s lake week so gonna have to work again in a few days after some date shenanigans and hopefully I’ve got some more good stories and shit. 

[rueur]

Morning Pages #44 (23.03.2017)

Thursday 23rd March - 10:30 p.m.

Thursdays are always going to be rather draining for me, with the 6 a.m. start and the fact that my last lecture is two hours long, from 3:15 till 5:15. I tried catching the tram home today because I thought it would be faster, and ended up walking all the way to Bourke Street to do so. When I got there though, the trams were far too packed for me to deal with and I was starving, mind you. I didn’t have the energy to stand up like that, and I really wanted to finish ‘The Member of the Wedding’ before Evan comes over tonight, because he’s supposed to come over within the next hour. I wanted to be able to give the book back to his dad, because honestly I would like some more recommendations. I’ve finished the book now, and thought it was adorable, and kind of relatable. The way Frankie feels about her town is the way that I feel about Mill Park, and my being in Northcote very much feels like an escape from my real life. I didn’t understand why she thought her only way out was to latch onto her brother’s marriage though, because it didn’t sound like she was too close to her brother to begin with. I do understand the feeling of having no ‘we’ though; possessing no sense of belonging or a limited sense of self can be painful and it’s usually teenagers who have to deal with that whilst they still possess the belief that they’re going through it alone. That’s what makes it worse, that dual loneliness. What’s ironic is that they’re both constructed isolations rather than actual ones.

Anyway, I finished the book and now I can start ‘Treasure Island’ (or continue with it, I guess) OR I can get started on the ‘East of Eden’ letters and go out and finally buy myself a copy of the book too. Honestly though, I feel like I should read ‘Treasure Island’ first, just because it’s been a long time coming with that book too, and I have kind of already started it. But Evan got me the ‘East of Eden’ letters so I feel like I shouldn’t put it off. I don’t know! I also have a fuckton of uni work too, I mean who has time for pleasure reading during the semester anymore? I’m conscious of the fact that I’ve had a new book with me every week so far, and I do like the idea of maintaining that streak, but I just don’t know if I have the luxury of time to do that. I have to rewrite my news story because we were given some pretty wholesome feedback today and I realised that my entire story angle is seriously flawed. I went from 749 words to about 400 words today, but hopefully I can just cut and paste portions of the first draft into my final draft. I also need to write some sort of report on radio dramas, and write up my pitch for next Monday. I also have to research my Sustainable Development midterm essay, and my Stakeholder Assessment Map. What a ridiculous assessment task! I really hope that I can just get away with hand-drawing a chart because I honestly don’t want to have to deal with computer mapping. Excel and digital graph-making, anything like that. I’m not very great with it, and I thought I’d seen the end of it last year with the charts I had to make for Greening Landscapes.

Also, for the past few days I’ve been really tempted to buy some crop tops from asos, because they’re on clearance right now and they’re like five or six dollars each, and also I only just realised that my body is kind of pretty sweet right now. I’m wearing my FILA bra and my camo pants and I feel really good about myself. My hair is finally looking like itself again, I mean since I shaved it. It’s growing back thick and glossy and full of character and I love it. But that’s not the point. My point is that I want to add to my wardrobe, primarily clothes that I’ll feel comfortable going out in. I want to look really good for Evan too, I mean whenever I can. I want him to be able to show me off, I want him to feel lucky to have me. I just feel so lucky to have him. I was talking to Malith about this when he came over, about the fact that we both think we’re with people who are so together and good for us, because we are relatively not together in comparison. I don’t know why I’m talking about this right now! I was supposed to be talking about cute, cheap crop tops! I am growing increasingly tempted by it all, but that’s only if I can summon the dumb courage to spend the money. I’ve spent like three hundred dollars this month alone, which is not ideal. I only have about $1300 to live off of for the rest of this year, or until I get a job. I’m aiming to get a job after this semester, I think. I’ve been handing out my resume though, although it’s been rather sporadically. I’m more focused on getting through this semester academically-speaking, yes. The work is beginning to pile up. I think it also might be because I’m getting my period - or I should be getting my period soon - but I had absolutely no focus today. My head was all over the place, and I was painfully inarticulate in both of my tutorials. That and it might be my honeymoon brain too. It’s a likely combination of the two. I bought pads today just in case, because Clue says my period is supposed to come either tomorrow or the day after tomorrow, that is if it’s managed to stay on the 28-day cycle I was on back when I was taking the pill. It probably hasn’t though. I don’t think I’m pregnant though, even though Evan can sometimes be a little sloppy with his hands. I mean he’ll grab his dick then finger me or something, or maybe I’m just paranoid that he does that, but I’ve seen him grab his dick before sex and it makes me a little bit nervous. I don’t know why I’m talking about this.

I’m rambling. I just want to finish these pages before he comes over. It’s nearly 10 to 11 and he’s supposed to be here around 11. I was really tempted to go to his game tonight too, but I got home at like half past seven in the evening. Yes, it took me two hours to get home today. I’m not entirely sure why either! I didn’t feel like an hour and a half had passed between the end of the lecture and my being on the platform at Flinders Street. I did walk all the way to Flinders from uni, and I did stop at Bourke Street and also along Swanston Street at this Subway store where a man had collapsed. I stood there for a while in mute concern for this man, as a whole bunch of other people actually did something about it. I just didn’t want to leave until I knew he’d be okay, even if I could do nothing to help him. But then I realised that that was selfish of me, to stay in the way whilst he was being helped, or whilst other people who were more equipped to help him, were trying to help him. What was disconcerting to me was the fact that some people walked past without even realising a man had collapsed. I understand people who did double-takes or people who registered what was going on and walked ahead stony-faced, because the city can be a very isolating environment. But there were actually people who didn’t even notice, who were so caught up in the hustle and bustle that they didn’t even realise a fellow man was in peril.

So Evan’s over right now. He’s sitting on the floor at Emily’s place, petting what was a very affectionate Romulus. Romy was hiding under the bed for the past couple of hours because I had vacuumed today. I think I might wrap it up prematurely maybe, just because I am very conscious of this adorable dude sitting in front of me right now. He’s grinning over my laptop, because I may have just revealed that these pages are somewhat confidential. Okay, so he’s gone into the bedroom now because I was noticeably distracted by him. Okay, I’m going to finish this last page in record time because I want to spend time with him because he’s a sweetheart. Oh man I am disgusting. This is diabetes-inducing, honestly.

I had two twix bars today, because they were on special at Foodworks at Union House, one bar for $1.50. I have $3.10 in change so I said ‘fuck it’ and decided to treat myself, because I felt like chocolate. I have two mandarins and an apple and two twix bars for lunch, and oats in the morning. I had the rest of Evan’s curry for dinner with some of ammi’s rice. I messaged Lauren to see if she would eat the eggs, but she said she wouldn’t, which is a damn shame because I was looking forward to cooking for her for a change. But it’s also fine because at least I’m not feeding her something that goes against her principles. Evan just sneezed. I really want to be over and done with this page. I’m listening to Childish Gambino, 3005 but the Part Two version, the slower version. It’s nice but I’m kind of over this song, which is understandable I mean it’s like four or so years old now and even the original gets rather repetitive. I’m into Sober right now, because I recently showed Evan the music video for that song. I really just want to be over and done with these pages! He’s here! I want to just hug him and kiss him and ugh ugh ugh I really can’t wait, I really can’t wait to be done with these pages. This is actually ridiculous, but I need some discipline, I mean I have to get back into this. I didn’t write for TEN DAYS. That is inexcusable.

Okay, so I feel like I’m nearing the end of this! I scrolled down as much as I can and I can finally see the end of this blasted final page, so I’m feeling rather good right now. My hands are typing almost at a rabbit’s pace, fuck I just realised I paused here trying to describe how fast my hands are typing. These pages are useful in securing the discipline of writing every day, yes, but if I’m writing nothing of substance would this discipline still translate? I feel like maybe with time, these pages will start holding actual ‘flourished’ sentences. Bri said that on Facebook today, and I thought it was cute. She was talking about getting into writing, by taking a writing class or something. She’s doing a fair bit of dabbling, which is neat. I’ve been meaning to return to some drawing in my free time. I had the courage to show Isaac the drawing I did of him, and he said he liked it, even though it was rather basic. I don’t know what he thinks of me anymore, if he ever thinks fond thoughts of me. I don’t know, I just like the idea of him doing that, but I know I don’t want anything romantic with him. He’s a bit odd, and he’s been growing increasingly odd the longer I’ve known him. Sad and odd, and alone. I don’t know if he feels lonely, but I have a strong suspicion that he does, and he uses work as a vice even though work is the reason he mostly finds himself alone. His transience is also inhibiting him from securing a sense of belonging; in lieu of that belonging, he has boundless ambition. I know that he’s going to end up relocating to New York or something.

Okay I’m on the fourth page now so I’m going to go. See you bitches tomorrow, I’m going to go hang with my baby.

[curiositynes-blog]

CS:GO in a nutshell

1. there really isn’t THAT many russians in CS:GO, atleast from my experience. 

2. Most of the smurfs are mainly asians & russians, oh, did I say mainly asians?

3. I got past the Silvers, quickly. Just do your best in playing and you’ll soon be above them. P.S Improve your aim by using the suitable sensitivity for you, Ignore the people calling you a noob or some shit. Prove them wrong. Play on a decent gaming rig, atleast go past 30fps which is the “playable” framerate, don’t try to have a 144Hz monitor or some Razer shit that lights up or somethin’, just use a decent mouse and decent everything, you’ll do fine.

4. There’s a fuckton of callouts for EVERY map. You don’t need to memorize them, you’ll get confused and believe me, it’s confusing at a certain point. Just try to remember the most important ones such as “ct, mid, al (a long), as (a short)” and so on and so forth. 

5. Get used to the gameplay. This isn’t Call o’ dooty where as you ADS and get magical laser-precision accuracy. CS:GO, atleast at some extent, has a much more realistic bullet physics. There’s a spray pattern for every gun, excluding the knife & zeus (duh). For some reason, Valve didn’t implement usable iron sights, so you’re only gonna ADS in scoped weapons. Told ya to some extent only. 

6. Boosts. Ye boi. You don’t need to learn them until you’re playing on a daily basis and having a goal such as reaching a ‘high’ rank in CS:GO per say DMG. Won’t go into further details, YouTube already has the answers for boosts, also for the other ones I’ve discussed. Also Google. 

7. Skins, unless it’s Pay-to-not-to-win-but-to-instead-look-like-a-rich-fucker-that-has-a-dlore-or-just-damn-right-lucky, don’t buy any of them. Unless you’re chancy and wanna spend some dollars (or some other kind o’ currency.) and try your luck against the “unpredictable” case that cost less than the key itself.

8. Updates: NEXT UPCOMING UPDATE INCLUDES THE SHOE CASE (that costs less that a quarter with the case itself and 10 fucking dollars for the goddamn key) NOW YOU HAVE A CHANCE TO WIN an actually decent skin, OR AN EXCEEDINGLY RARE SHOE(S). NOW WITH ADIDAS, NIKE, JORDANS, AND OTHER SHIT THAT’S BASICALLY A WALLET BAIT FOR YOU GULLIBLE FUCKS TO BUY AND ENJOY.

That’s about it, but nonetheless, it’s still a great game. Play it for yourself, who knows, maybe you’ll be one of the players competing in ESL Cologne or MLG or Pax East or some shit. Good luck on your journey, either on becoming a smurf or a wannabe Global Elite. ;D